Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - The Power of Persistence: Dance Until It Rains

Episode Date: January 31, 2025

Success isn’t about luck—it’s about persistence. Like a rain dance that works if you dance long enough, life rewards those who refuse to stop moving. The question isn’t whether the effort will pay off, but whether you’re willing to keep going until it does. Every step forward creates momentum, and as long as you’re moving, you’re still in the game. Failure only exists when you decide to stop. The truth is, the road to success is built on resilience, commitment, and the courage to keep dancing—especially when the rain feels far away. So, how long are you willing to dance? Because the rain will come, but only if you refuse to quit. Monday Motivation Newsletter: https://www.eddiepinero.com/newsletter Free Ebook: www.eddiepinero.com/ebook  YouTube: www.eddiepinero.com/youtube 

Rain dances work 100% of the time. If you dance until it rains. Someone kind of jokingly said this to me recently at an entrepreneur event, and I thought, man, I get it, it's clever, but there's actual genius behind that. You tend to get what you're looking for if you don't stop looking.

Right, like you eventually arrive where you need to be if your feet don't stop moving. The question we often find ourselves asking is, did the dance work? But the real question, the question of value, is how long are you willing to dance around that fire? How much of yourself did you put into the pursuit? You know, it's both liberating and terrifying to find out that there is no failure in life. There's simply the permission we give ourselves to move forward. That trajectory we continue on

up until we reach a point where we look around and say, no, thank you, I'm done. Because if you're moving forward, you haven't failed. You have not lost. If you're moving forward, everything is possible. If you're moving forward, you are creating reality. The question is not, have you failed? the question is, are you still willing to move forward?

It's not did the rain dance bring the rain. It's, were you willing to dance around that fire until the sky's opened up? I often think about the stoic idea that there are things we can control and there are things we can't. And knowing that difference is wisdom. The same idea that has become,

as many people know, the serenity prayer. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. It's certainly powerful to understand the difference between what we can control and what we can't, but it's also worth noting that those things we cannot control, even when they seem to make life harder, when they're not what we want, when they're frustrating and difficult and exhausting, They can be brought into your world and leveraged as tools to ultimately get you where you need to go. Slinghot to something better, right?

There's value in all of it. And if you're looking at life through the lens of I'm not stopping until X happens, well, then everything that occurs around you is just a vehicle taking you closer to X. Put simply, you can't always control what happens. but you can always control what you do with what happens. And that's power. That is strength. So using a tangible practical example,

right around the time COVID emerged in 2020, I was speaking about five or six times a month. I had video production clients, and my own personal content creation was relatively minimal. And so that hit to a lot of, our way of life, the one we all endured, took a lot of companies' budgets, right? That uncertainty

prevented a lot of people from spending the marketing money they were spending. And on its face, it's a bad thing, right? It took a lot of business for me. But I look back now and I'm like, that pivot, you know, 10xed, 20xed my digital footprint. I was able to reach more people from my home studio. I adjusted, right?

And that was the beginning of the most important transition of my business. To be honest, perhaps even my life at that point. You can't control a virus. You can't control the public's reaction to it. But you can take the pieces and make something with them. You can dance around that fire until it rains and dance around it I did. And by the way, so many people I know today did the same thing. Adversity has created more masterpieces, more miracles than calm ever.

could because it makes a step back and look at our creation in a new way. Remember, quitting is not something that the external world projects upon you. Quitting is looking around and saying, wow, this is a lot. This is more than I can handle. I'm done. This is the end. I don't want to walk into this storm. I'm not interested in embracing the chaos. And I want to take a second to remind you that if you put your head down and just continuously step into it, if you can remind yourself, I didn't make this situation, but day by day I can make something valuable from it, you're making yourself powerful beyond measure. It's not superhuman strength or some godly intellect that makes the difference at the end of the day. It's a willingness to understand,

right, that if you do not stop, if you're willing to adjust and keep moving forward, you become invincible. There's a lot you can't control, but you can control what it all means and how you'll navigate it. That understanding is greatness. So dance around that fire until the rain falls, because if you dance long enough, it surely will. The world, it need you. But it needs the real you. Not the one with the mask looking to blend in, nor the one making all those concessions to avoid being left out. No, the real you. With your flaws and your insufficiencies, your strengths and your gifts, your hopes and your dreams,

it needs the you that so often hides away underneath that blanket of caution and skepticism, the you that's coupled with vulnerability. More easily ignored than brought to life with conviction, but that's the you this world needs. When I was younger, I seemed to separate life into two categories. Me and one and everyone else and the other. And guess which of the two categories I assumed had it all figured out. In my mind, I was the one, the only one who didn't know, the one who was winging it, stumbling my way through each and every day. All those other people, though, they not only had plans, they had the right plans. They knew the right details, but I didn't. And so in my head, me being right required, I

I necessarily look to them. I follow their lead. Since there exists an established correct path, that must be where I steer the ship. But then some time passes. You grow older, maybe pick up a little wisdom along the way, and you realize that no one really knows what they're doing.

There are very few objectively correct roads that must be traveled. Life is not a paint by number, it's a blank canvas. And understanding this changed the image in my head, from one of me knocking on the door of a party everyone else was at, to visualizing almost 8 billion individual souls running around, trying to figure things out in the limited stretch of time they have here on planet Earth. I realized I had at times felt small only because of the gravity I attributed to people who were just trying to figure it out themselves.

And the point, certainly not to diminish anyone else's journey, it was to give myself permission to embark upon my own. It's just hard to do that when you view everyone else as one collective, all-knowing entity, as opposed to 8 billion people just like you. you with thoughts fears hopes and plans the question is not what is the right thing to do here the question is when will you allow yourself to venture out into the world and find what the right thing means for you that's what's required and the world will be better for you having found it because after all no one sees life like you do. No one has the background or worldview. The universe has conspired to put you as you are here now. Almost an impossible occurrence in and of itself. How easy that is to forget.

We were born on the summit, yet the inclination for some reason is to keep our eyes closed. No, open them. Take it all in. Allow the view to propel you forward, the way world needs you. It needs you with your mistakes that have helped you evolve into the person you could never have been without them. It needs you with your worries and your fears. Conquering them will be pivotal in your evolution. It needs you with your flaws and blemishes. How else would life convince you that the things that make you different are the same things that make you strong? It doesn't matter how many people tell you or try to explain to you the magnitude of what's at your feet. Life does not begin until you allow yourself to start living.

Until you realize that yesterday does not define you. And the categories in which you've placed yourself, they're transitory. The past is not the reason you can or can't begin again. It's not who you are forever. No, it's the advantage you now possess as you move forward. Should you choose to move forward? It's in realizing you are bound by nothing that you free yourself. And for the one wondering, why does it matter what I think?

Why should I start or try or risk anything? Why should I pick up the brush and start painting on that canvas before me? Well, because that step is where it all begins, the meaning, the purpose, it's all predicated upon our willingness to pick that brush up and start painting. You ask what's the point? The point is everything. One detail at a time we dismantle our previously held notions about what life is supposed to be and finally start living one that matters.

No one's masterpiece will look like yours. No one's depiction of life will follow the same parameters you've etched onto that canvas. In fact, there are people that will be changed forever because you chose to live your life fully. There are lives of those around you that will be transformed because you picked up the brush. There are stories that will now end in triumph because you found the courage to start, to see light in yourself. being fulfilled and the world being better off they're not two different things when you live a life true to yourself when you let go of the half-toes and step into the

get-toes the world experiences the luxury of the beauty that comes next when you fill your cup up first you're able to then replenish those around you that's not nothing so who are you Beneath the characterizations, beneath the roles you've taken on, beneath what you feel you're supposed to be. All that. Who are you and will you give life to that person? Will you be that courageous? After all, that's what life is.

It's not a game of right and wrong so much as it's a game of courage. The ones willing to take the leap end up worlds away from where they begin. So my ask of you is that you begin tearing down those walls created in your head. The ones that accumulated over days and months and years. The ones that box you in or keep you out that suggest you are anything other than that one in 400 trillion miracle. Ready to embark upon the ride of a lifetime. And sure, it means shedding the comfort of obsession. the comfort of obscurity, the safety of projection.

Looking yourself in the mirror and saying, I am worth it, and there's more out there means without question you are taking off the training wheels, dancing with vulnerability. But it also means when that time comes and you look back on how you lived your days, you can say I truly, you can say that the world needed me. And I had the courage to heed its call.

Sometimes I wonder why. Why does this season of life feel like it's one undesirable outcome after another? What happened to the law of averages? When is the wind? Where is the light at the end of the tunnel? Why would I continue going in this direction? When it feels like that spot on the horizon I've been chasing has a little. I've eluded me.

Why? Why are my results not aligning with my output? It's hard to wake up and do this. It takes all of me to give this much. Sometimes I wonder where is the delayed gratification everyone speaks of. Where's the fruit of my labor, the arm on my shoulder that says this is why it was all worth it?

Why hasn't the payoff shown itself? shown itself. Why? And why does it seem like every curveball materializes at the worst possible time? Why won't my body cooperate now when I need it most? Why does my mind play with the worst case scenarios? Why does an already challenging path have to be more difficult than it is now? How many ways do I have to feel pain? Why does discomfort follow me around? Why won't life let me shake this? Why?

Just maybe it's to show you how strong you are. What you can endure. Because deep down in your soul, you know you are the 1% Because if you can push through this, you can push through anything. And I don't know why life gives us its lessons when it does. Why the world seems to stack it on when we're at our most vulnerable, when the ground beneath us is most unstable. But if you can find the courage to step back and see this for what it is,

If you can hold on to the idea that this is happening for you, you'll come out of this a different person. You don't need to perform a miracle when you're at your lowest. No, the courage, the power, the strength is in showing up. You need to continue forward. Let go of the week, the month, the year. Sometimes we are tasked with pushing through the moment, the hour surviving the day.

And sometimes there is nothing more courageous than that, nothing more powerful than seeing what it turns into down the road when we look over our shoulders and are grateful we never stopped. So yes, this season might seem like a non-stop barrage of obstacles and misfortune. Why? Perhaps because it's life allowing you to plant your seed now So that when spring comes around you are provided something you've never had before You arrive at that spot in the horizon you've been aiming at

And yes the results might not feel like they're aligning with your output Why? Perhaps because when the compounding reaches that magical point that point of statistical significance And the desirable things happen then, as quickly as the difficult ones do now, it'll all make sense. You'll appreciate it, value it, and be equipped to handle it. And yeah, life might seem to be throwing you curveball after curveball. Why? Perhaps because if you can trudge forward now, when your body's tired while navigating the trivary,

and tribulations of life. When you can bring greatness into existence under duress, just imagine what waits around the corner. Imagine how you'll perceive those seemingly impossible obstacles that slow everyone else down. There'll be nothing more than a cool breeze and a sunny day as you move towards your best self. Look, it's hard to understand when we are in it.

It's hard to make sense of the day, dark and the chaos and the hurt, but find a way to remember. No matter how hard it seems that this life is happening for you and not to you. This is the seed in the palm of your hand that will mean something that matters. So hold on. Hold on to see that seed begin to rise from the ground. Hold on to feel the warmth of the sun. Hold on through the storms of life, they will be why when you look back years from now. You'll have gotten from life that which was once merely a dream. There's something to the idea or act of stepping out of the limelight to work on yourself. to quote unquote disappear for a particular period of time

so that with a laser-like focus you're able to build and develop the skills that will make you great at what it is you want to do. In a sense, we're not created out in the world as much as we're created by what we do behind the scenes. The thousands of hours spent dedicating ourselves to a craft We enhance our value and capability by doing the often monotonous, unglomerous things day in and day out, and those results out in the world are merely a reflection of that work.

And that's what makes excelling in any given area so challenging. There's something counterintuitive about performing to an audience of one. Dancing to no applause, exhausting time, in energy, resources, so that you can cling to a promise. But that's also why excellence will always be reserved for a few. Open to everyone, but ultimately a few end up there, right? The same way a finish line is open to everyone. But ultimately reserved only for those willing to put in the hundreds,

if not thousands of practice miles, to start the race, run the race and complete the race, there's a substantial amount of sacrifice involved. The outside world is its own chess game. It requires courage and innovation and a willingness to step into its great unknown, but ideally in doing so, one would be armed with the competency they've acquired

when no one is looking. It's a result of their own dedication, and commitment. And I actually started thinking about this during a Q&A I did recently, where someone asked if I had any thoughts on how they could start a speaking career. I'm like sure happy to give my thoughts.

First and foremost, understand it's a long play. So be willing to endure that bumpy road, that journey. There's no magic formula that makes you an MLK-esque order overnight, right? You work forever to capture a fragment of that excellence. And someone kind of chimed in, giving me a hard time. You know, we know, we know, Eddie, you hate marketing. And I'm like, marketing. It took me a second to connect the dots.

How is this related? And the light bulb went off. And I kind of laughed because I do bash marketing quite a bit. And I think what they were getting to is I'm always talking about the long game. Right? And I'm always talking about working on yourself, the back end, the deep work, chiseling yourself into something that's unique, authentically you, extraordinary in its own right. Or being so good as the saying goes, they can't ignore you. But at the same time, it would be pretty ridiculous and stupid for me to say marketing is not important.

Marketing's pivotal. Engrained in some capacity in everything we touch, you have to be able to effectively communicate. why something is valuable, obviously. But I think there is a misconception and genuine misunderstanding in today's day and age with regard to adding value, with regard to rising to the top of a niche or making an impact.

You know, we see flashy posts and ads and videos and think, ah, that's the target. But that's just the mechanism for communication, for communication. That's the bullhorn. That's not the value ad. In Cal Newport's deep work, he mentions how difficult it's becoming for us to break away from the social media and the push notifications and the emails and in solitude do the kind of work that really moves the needle. That propels our greatness and makes us better at what it is we're looking to be great at. We officially exist in a world of distraction.

Where perhaps the greatest challenge now is how do we disconnect? How do we turn off? How do we slip into a state of deep work so that we can grow as people? And then, sure, you market that competency once it's acquired. But the goal is not to be a society screaming into a void, to sell boxes of air. We simply can't afford to leave substance behind. Value is ultimately what makes the world go round,

and it's created, again, outside of the limelight. And look, there's going to be some bias to my approach based on the path that I chose to take. This has worked for me, so I stand by it. I advocate for it. And surely there are some very talented people that disagree with me and that's great. But I've always had the arrow pointed at what I want to do,

what I want all this to mean at 45 years old, 55 years old. And right now, looking back, it's all the hours I spent writing in solitude, or giving speeches to a wall in a studio apartment, recording and re-recording, adjusting my approach, it's reps, reps, reps, that, to me is what matters now. That's what I'm most thankful for. And some time is past, and as I transition into a new phase, now, sure, I can get help and start blasting posts all over social media.

That's easy. But the important thing is that I have a foundation to stand on. The posts are not the product. The craft is the product. And I want everyone to at least, whether they agree with me or not, understand that distinction. The million dollar question, the differentiator is what is your value? If you can ask yourself that, right, what is the one thing I want to be the best in the world at? Where is my North Star?

And then spend every day, at least some time every day, chipping away at that, you'll be unstoppable. But truly chipping away. Not feeling the need to share every detail with an audience or capture every second of what you're building behind the scenes. Now, turn the cameras off, breathe, focus. Be private for at least a portion of your day. I think you'll find in that space this beautiful opportunity to reflect and build and step into an evolved version of yourself. Don't be scared to disappear and come back better at least. Don't be hesitant to go work on yourself.

If you're talking substantive impact, true value add, it's always the people willing to put in the hours. To do the things that most people are not willing to do, target, identify the areas that make the difference, and then hammer those repeatedly. And look, I get it. You have to, in a lot of cases, give up some of the things give up some of the now in order to reach an ambitious goal in the future.

It's a trade-off. It's hard. But life is about trade-offs. And maybe this message isn't for everyone. But if you're listening to this and you want to achieve some semblance of excellence in a given area, it's inescapable. It means falling in love with the pursuit that's time-intensive. It means showing up and putting in the hours often for little short-term validation. It means solitude because getting better is more important than attention. One of my favorite quotes is confidence is earned.

Will you earn that confidence by showing up and committing to the things that truly matter that make you stronger? Sometimes we must step back to leap forward. disappear as we are in order to reappear as we wish to be. Real work happens when no one is around you. Can you trust yourself enough to bet on that process? Believe in that road, in that journey. If yes, you'll position yourself for opportunities and experiences that exceed your wildest imagination.

The hard thing brought me through hell, but also to that which exists on the other side. The hard thing prompted me to question and doubt, but also provided the pieces I used to build my confidence little by little. It made me ask the tough questions, the ones maybe I didn't want to hear the answer to, but also gave me the power. to transform those answers I didn't like. The hard thing meant forfeiting being the expert in my world in exchange for the role of student in a foreign arena. It gave me new ladders to climb, new possibilities to reach for. It showed that true growth requires a willingness to be the beginner.

It took some people out of my arms, my circle, my work, and in some cases my life altogether, but always seem to open the door to those souls better aligned, to those conducive to the journey and the process. Let's remember what the hard thing is. Beyond the pain, because we all know it does bring that, beyond the challenges, because there are certainly many.

Beyond all that exists the hope and the change and the promise. Robert Frost says the best way out is always through. Through because it's the chaos, the haze, the darkness of night that shapes us. It's in being broken that we learn to rebuild our world with the pieces and perhaps most importantly. We learn that such a rebuilding process is possible to begin with, that the now is not mandatory or permanent. The hard thing, as it turns out, is nothing more than a transaction. Turbulence for the view above the clouds, fear in the moment for confidence in the future. It's learning that although life sometimes appears to paint a picture of conformity,

and helplessness, there's always a path leading to the very place we need to go. It just asks we find the courage to walk it. Churchill has said the pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity, the optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty. And this beautiful message rings true, because from the difficulty is, is the advantage. And sure, our first instinct is to see the problem.

Our eyes tend to initially fixate on that which is unfortunate. But beyond that is where we get the most incredible things life provides, as if one is removing the shell or outer layer in order to get to the nutrients in the center, the ingredients required for growth, the pieces necessary to experience life, at its fullest. And so we must be reminded that those opportunities, they're not rare, they're not reserved for everyone but you. They just tend to disguise themselves

as the things we're most inclined to disregard or walk by. But if one finds the courage to move into them, through them, if one can see the difficulty not as a deterrent, but as a bargain, They'll be given everything on the other side. Reality is not changed with the magic wand or the granting of a wish. It's from staring down the heart thing and moving directly into it one little step at a time. Move the lifelines. Eliminate plans B, C and D. Let the curtains close and the lights close and the light.

dim. See, the beginning of something new requires the ending of something current. So make life propel you into Chapter 2. Let the door slam and lock behind you throw away the key. With the boats burned and turning back off the table, we have to make it work. We have to have to figure it out. Well, how, we might ask, with only these pieces, with only this circumstance, with only these resources. Well, it's funny how when walking away is no longer a possibility, so many other possibilities are born.

When we're stuck between the wall and our demons, we roll up our sleeves and do that, which we have been, let's face it, running from. We fight. We become proactive. We take initiative. It was always there. We just never had to.

So if you can't do it on your own, make life make you. Because the bottom line is there are new horizons that await your arrival. They are always there. But they require you to make the trip. to look out over the vastness of what's before you and convince yourself that what's ahead can become your new normal. And oh, how I wish we weren't biologically preconditioned to preserve, to stay safe, to stay the same.

How I wish we weren't constantly being pulled to stay right where we are. Our minds, they love it here. With the rest of the world, the change, the hope, the progress, all on the other side of that window, all outside, all foreign to us. You don't need any of that, it'll tell you. Or maybe, after you conjure up a little courage, it might compromise. It might say, fine, it's worth a try. Put one foot out the door, but don't forget, you can always come back to me.

You can always retreat. It's warm here, safe here, it's predictable here. The mind wants you to know that when things get tough, mediocrity, and comfort are always right behind you, ready to embrace you with open arms. And it's for this reason that those boats must be burned, that the door must be locked, and that chapter must be closed. The journey before you, it's going to be difficult. There's no question about that.

Anything of value brings difficulty. And when faced with the adversity, the only way to defeat it is to know there is only one way. One option available to you. And that one option is forward. It's through. There is no backwards or compromise. There is no safety. Not if you want from life that which is extraordinary.

Not if you want the things we covet, dream of. whether they're interpersonal, financial, career-oriented, health-related, maybe you just know in your soul that right now ain't it. Any move to something better will present to you its obstacles. And my advice, if it's what you really want, is to have decided before you started that there is no other way. There's no negotiating with yourself. Because if you allow that door to be cracked, life will kick it open.

So point the compass north and dismiss any notion that what's comfortable is more important than what's meaningful. When you're cold, nothing is more appealing than that warmth. But warmth is deception, a short-term ploy for you to forget what really matters. An illusion. See, cold subsides. but victory is forever knowing that you pushed forward when most wouldn't is forever

transforming potential into strength when your knees shook is forever so burn the boat for no other reason that there is no way forward so long as there remains a way back make life make you win

And where most would look around and see evidence of defeat, you'll find again and again in the same quote-unquote evidence. The tools to build ladders to new beginnings and bridges to new worlds, there's a saying that I love. That most of life's successful people were too ignorant of the odds to know their accomplishments were considered at one point impossible. And I love it because it highlights that there was never a fallback option, a concern for the statistics. There was no worry or exhausted energy on what if. Rather, it was constant building and adjusting. Finding ways over, through, and around the walls that inevitably stand before us. There was no way home.

So they pushed forward. into their greatness. And so can you, whatever shape, form or color greatness looks like in your eyes, whatever mountaintop appeals to you, if you want it,

if you're willing to decide before you go that you will one day stand amongst the clouds peering out at that world you deemed wasn't against you, but for you, anything is possible. What does it mean to be a little better every single day? James Clear has noted that if each day you improve by only 1%,

you'll be a full 37 times better in a year. That's an almost unfathomable number. Unbelievable transformation. Imagine being 37 times better at what it is you're looking to improve on. 37 times more efficient or skilled. All because of a 1% per day commitment. Almost sounds too good to be true. Here's the catch though.

1% doesn't seem like much. Which is good, one might think. You know, that should make it easier. Well, sort of. The easier and more seemingly trivial something is to accomplish, the easier it is to dismiss it as well. as well. We've all been there that, and maybe not today, maybe tomorrow. No big deal. We don't lose anything. And that's what we must learn to wrestle with. Jim Roan puts it this way. He says

being successful is easy. The issue is that being unsuccessful is easy too. Saying yes to the little things you know you need to do is easy. But so is saying no. Putting your phone away to work on something of substance, yeah, that's pretty easy. But watching just one more TikTok or Instagram or YouTube video, that's easy too. Putting your shoes on, going for a walk or run, heading to the gym. Hey, procedurally, pretty easy. Not that complex, but talking yourself into just going tomorrow instead. Also, a rationalization that's pretty easy. And that's essentially the question, which easy are you going to go with? How do you put yourself in position to select the right easy?

Well, like so many things, it starts with the worldview and flows out to the tangible actions we take in support of that worldview. First things first. We have to know that the biggest advantage available, is seeing the small things as so much more than small things. It's refusing to fall victim to the disappointment and burnout associated with hoping for one huge jump, a miracle solution, the answer that will change everything. That's deceiving. Winning looks small and consistent.

Progress is boring. It's mundane. It looks like deciding on what matters. and then making a pact with yourself every day to keep your own promises. When most would fall off or push things to tomorrow, it's seeing your commitment as everything. Knowing that the people who manufacture significance in their lives, they treat what others would call silly and trivial as life and death.

They make the details into the whole storyline. So yeah, it might be easy for someone else to walk away. But when you have given yourself no other option but to succeed, the little steps to make it happen require zero thought or internal deliberation. The person who gets into shape over the course of six months, they're not going to be the one who found a secret diet, bought a piece of equipment on Amazon. They didn't do the necessary thing here and there when they had their fleeting moments of inspiration. No, they made better, consistent decisions. No to the soda, yes to the water, no to the alarm, yes to the run,

no to the Netflix and yes to the gym. Both options were easy in the moments in which they arose. But each time only one option mattered. And that's what it's about, tying the prolonged gratification to something that means the world to you, where each step is not just a step, but one step closer to the moon. So no, it's certainly not that a can of Coke or dessert

or the day off will kill you, but flip the narrative. It's that when you do stay true to your mission and the promises you make to yourself, you get something so much more back. It's not, oh, what will I lose by skipping this 1% No, in a world where excellence compounds, it's look what I am becoming. And this decision is an investment too good to pass up.

And every decision to move forward, to embrace the things that align with your true North, is a nod to that future self. Lead yourself first. Before we can influence, before we can ever persuade or change anything externally, we have to first lead ourselves. And that means delivering on the promises we make to ourselves. It means showing up when we tell ourselves we're going to show up. It means putting ourselves in an environment conducive to grow up. There's an old metaphor from Wayne Dyer about an orange where he essentially says that it doesn't matter what you do to an orange.

It doesn't matter how hard you squeeze it or how many you have or how you manipulate it. Grapefruit juice will never come out of an orange. Only orange juice can be emitted and similarly we can never give or contribute what we do not have inside ourselves. inside ourselves. We can't expect our lives to look like anything other than a culmination of the tiny action, steps, and decisions we make on a daily basis. The external world is a product of the internal world, and the internal world is not realized until we learn to rule over ourselves and our lives with conviction.

You can break this down in many different ways. Jacco Willink says discipline equals freedom. John Maxwell talks about a leadership lid where success levels can never exceed leadership capability, and sure it applies to teams, but it also applies to self-leadership. Are you searching for and committing to the little hinges in your life that, as W. Clement Stone says, swing big doors.

That make the difference. Are you taking responsibility for your shortcomings like leaders do? Are you learning to trust yourself? Are you seeing past the trap of perfection and committing to progress? Are you taking the little things seriously? Because at the end of the day, all things are comprised of little things and only little things. The bottom line is that we master nothing until we master ourselves. Trust ourselves.

The bottom line is that we win when we lead ourselves, to hold ourselves accountable for the little things that matter even when it hurts or we're tired, even though no one's going to come up and reprimand us for falling short. There are often no visible consequences when we let ourselves down, so let's manufacture that urgency. If you promised yourself you'd get up when that alarm clock goes off, it becomes no longer optional. If you promised yourself, you'd go down.

the road that scares you, it becomes no longer one road of many. It is now the only road. Even though it may be scary or intimidating, it's the darkness that must be confronted. You are more powerful than you know, you are more capable than you understand, but you must lead yourself to your potential. Those little things matter.

And so while the temptation is to brush them off is insignificant, while the rest of the world ebbs and flows through life like jellyfish with the tide, your superpower will be to see, harness, and multiply those little decisions like they are gold. Your strength is that when it's easier to run, you'll be the one that instead stands up and leads to you. yourself to greatness. Don't think so much. You might overlook the obvious. You might see past all that you've achieved. Don't move so quickly. You might overstep the moment. You might miss all the beauty you're created. One can wake up, get dressed, walk out the door thinking that they're on their way to a someday

achievable brilliant finale and simultaneously fail to understand the miracle of the now. It's in what you're doing now, who you're helping now, what you're becoming now. Your miracle is now. And you can't see your impact because it materializes behind you as your back is to it and you step toward those distant horizons. There's a direct link between always wanting to be better and never feeling like you're good enough. If you don't properly compartmentalize the two, you'll always be chasing something you can't obtain while you walk right by the brilliance you're piecing together in real time.

That carrot just outside of reach for the runner on the treadmill. And I'm not saying your goals and aspirations aren't incredible. I'm not saying you aren't one in a million. I'm not saying you won't shock, change, add unparalleled value to the world. No, that's most certainly possible. But I'm saying you're doing that now too. Like right now, you're not on a trajectory to someday be one in a million. You are one in a million on a trajectory to live life fully, to further expand, explore

as you should. But let's not lose perspective along the way. It's hard to watch someone who has changed your life feel like they're not good enough. It just is. It's hard to watch something so beautiful, feel like they must first evolve before they're worthy. And it's like, sure, I get it. We celebrate visible, tangible successes, the innovators and CEOs, world-class talents.

People who have built the present and will build the future. But notice, there are no ceremonies for the ones who lift others up every day, who lead by example, who show up again and again when they're going. going through their own private hell. There are no record books for them. But I'll tell you what, if there were you'd be there, and if I could remind you of that every day, I would. The small things you do do not feel so small to those around you.

In fact, your mere existence changed my life, and I know I'm not alone, not even close to alone. It's a tough world we live in. Tough enough to bring even the strongest amongst us to our knees. Yet you think you're flawed and insufficient. I ask, compared to what? A lot of people would have folded a long time ago. Wouldn't be fighting for a dream or standing for anything.

A lot of people wouldn't be giving so much of themselves. Again, I continuously run. into this question. Why is it that the ones who are changing the world, not with their social media follow account, but with their actions, so often fail to see their own value? Perhaps they're using the wrong measuring sticks.

Maybe their sights are set so high they don't realize all that they're making better along the way. Maybe they don't know that every soul they light up puts in motion a ripple effect, an exponential value add. But if you just lift your head up and look around, you would see quite the ripple effect. You would see quite the chain reaction.

You would see that you are not just working towards change. You are actively embodying it. Don't be the only one who can't see that. Why do I say this? Why spend the time? Well, because one, I think it's not something we say enough, the ones who truly change us or make our lives better need to be told that. There's just something tragic about keeping it to ourselves,

and two, because you don't give yourself enough credit. You're blind to the path you've traveled and the dragons you've slayed. I couldn't believe my ears when you apologize for being weak. Weak? Weak is retreating. Weak is being selfish. Weak is forfeiting your gifts. Those descriptions are antithetical to who you are. And sure, we all slip into them once in a while. We're human beings. We all endure our valleys of despair. But to fight with everything you have on your way back up,

that is not weakness. That's courage. I think our definitions might be crossed here. See, I'm a firm believer that absolutely we have to be our own greatest critics, no doubt. But the value in that, the actual in that. The expectation is that it's coupled with a commitment to also be our own greatest ally. Are you? Are you your own greatest ally? Because sometimes I'm not so sure. Do you see how much

light you bring to the world? How much better people around you are when you enter a room and smile, when you listen to them in their problem, when you inspire them. When you inspire them, by making decisions with so much at stake when you don't let the hardship of your past keep you down and I know how hard it's been I'm telling you this because maybe you don't know maybe you talk so much about what the future will be and how big and incredible things will become that you overlook the parallel world you are creating with each step along the way a pilgrim, a wanderer in search of an impact you are already making. So look, keep your head up and your expectations high.

You will do remarkable things. But don't be afraid to look over your shoulder and see that you already don't beat yourself up for not yet arriving at an imaginary place while you change the world along the way. Give yourself the same grace and compassion you would give to me. Allow that for yourself. Don't think so much that you overlook the obvious. You just might see past all that you've achieved. And don't move so quickly that you overstep the moment.

You might just miss all that beauty that you're creating. This isn't a pep talk. This is me holding up a mirror so that you can see the value at. You're not merely an IOU to some future self. You are all the people around you whose lives you make better every day, the lives you touch by being... There's an old idea that once you've started, you're halfway there. How does that make sense, one might wonder? Once you've started, you've only just begun.

And that's true, technically. But here's the thing. The journey, the ins and outs, ups and downs, trials and tribulations, they can all be dealt with. They knock us down from time to time, no doubt. But we learn, we adjust, and carry on as we move forward. Most success stories,

they're crushed, not because of that adversity along the way, but because they never begin. They never take shape or materialize. We can't make them real in our heads. We can't convince ourselves that they'll ever be anything other than fiction. We think that's for someone else.

We look around and assume that reality is different than my reality. And overcoming this mental constraint is always the most challenging step. And that's saying, the one I continuously find myself coming back to, human beings, always follow through on who they believe themselves to be, continues to be true. If you don't believe you're worthy of something, its pursuit is lost before it began. So while the mind tries to paint pictures

of how scary that road is ahead, how it's too different or big or complex, understand that should you move forward, you'll find all that complexity can be broken down. one day, one situation, one little step at a time. The only real demon here is the possibility of inaction because you couldn't make yourself believe it.

You couldn't see yourself at the top of that mountain. And so, the front door was never opened. Emerson says, hits your wagon to a star. A beautiful reminder that that star is proof Your dreams are real, and only as real as the conviction with which you move towards them. Green light, your own glory, your own contentment. Because contrary to what we might think, no one comes up and bestows that upon us. To live life fully is a decision.

Decision, Latin root words, cut off, it's removing and abandoning. your restraint in order to be more authentically you, in order that you'll give yourself permission to chase down that which makes you feel alive and soak up all that aligns with your heart and soul. Once you start, you're halfway there. And oh, that first step, often perceived as the beginning, but in actuality a point few ever give themselves. the luxury of experiencing.

Step one, believe it's possible. Step two, believe you're worthy. Step three, go. Everything else works itself out. You're capable of dancing through life's chaos, of managing the world's unknowns. So know that, understand that, but most importantly,

be one of the few who gives themselves permission to experience that. And it starts... We all enjoy the prospect of perfection. Everyone has an ideal outcome. We all make plans. But very rarely do they unfold

as they were drawn up. Why? Well, because life is predictably unpredictable. It's mysterious. Yet for some reason, we march on toward the acquisition of a flawless existence. Scared of anything but an undamaged, untarnished, immaculate reflection staring back at us in the mirror. But in the real world, you know, our happiness, contentment, growth, progress, they're not a product of perfection. They're built from the imperfection.

that we collect along the way, the trials, the tribulations. You know, when you piece all that together, like little puzzle pieces, they depict the beauty. They show the image that's always been so highly coveted. In other words, the process of rebuilding creates something more valuable

than the same pieces before they were broken down when they were untouched. In Japanese philosophy, there's a concept known as Kinsugi, which is the art of repairing broken pottery with a golden lacquer. It's the idea that we don't want to hide the damage, but we want to rebuild it into something more meaningful, more valuable, embrace the imperfect, own and cherish it. There's an old story about a tea master known as recoup,

and he was attending a Japanese tea ceremony with one of a Japanese tea ceremony with one of his followers. And the follower tries to impress Ray Q by buying this fancy clay jar and making it visible during the meeting. But Rai Q never once acknowledges it. The praise never comes. So the student, you know, obviously upset

by the lack of recognition, he pushes the jar off the counter. It falls to the floor. It breaks into a bunch of pieces. And another student ultimately repairs it using Kinsugi. He puts the pieces back together with a gold lacquer. And next time, Rick Hugh attends the tea ceremony as a guest of honor,

he sees the jar, rebuilt, and says now it's beautiful. Now it has character. He acknowledges its value. And this story reminds us about the myth of perfection. Life's not about dodging and avoiding the difficulty. It's about facing it head on. Because when we come out on the other side, we transform into something that was previously unobtainable and rise to a world beyond imagination.

See, we change not by running around life's obstacles, but by running directly through them. Like a muscle being repeatedly broken down and built back up, the pain, the exhausted energy is the vehicle. The micro creates the macro, the difficult becomes the exceptional. We need the very things we're inclined to avoid. Our shortcomings, they not only precede and establish our greatness, they are our greatness. Being broken is not a tragedy. It is a step along the way. It's the beginning of something new, a launching pad, a chance to be better than you have ever been.

Because look, here's the reality. If your status quo has never been shaken at its foundation, if you've never stopped and questioned the way things are, reality as it is, if you don't take risks, there will be no fragments to take and rebuild. You won't have the tools or capacity to change the world around you. And that is the thing of note. Beauty is not fearing the rebuild. It is the rebuild.

It's not feeling sorry or hopeless but hopeful, seeing your situation for what it is an opportunity. It is what you need, a blank canvas, your chance to make art while redrawing creative boundaries. If perfect is the goal, why take the step? Why take the chance? Why risk messing things up? It's never been about perfect. It's about picking up the pieces and rising again. We are in some ways helpless to what occurs around us. There are things that are beyond our control. But the gift we possess, our power, if you will,

is the ability to determine what we let in, how we internalize the externalities. We are responsible for being the gatekeepers of our minds, protectors of our worlds. There's a little saying that I aim to live by. It's incredibly simple. Basically, the idea is, if something is not a net positive on your life,

start working to eliminate it. If there's a person that is draining, creating more negative than positive, then they don't deserve to be in your world. Stop letting them in. If there's some place you're going that doesn't align with, what you value. Start working to eliminate that destination from your day to day. Stop letting it in.

If you find yourself constantly thinking about worst case scenarios, it's always, well, what if this goes wrong or that goes wrong? If you find yourself missing the opportunity and instead spotlighting the problem, start working to identify and isolate those thoughts so that they can be eliminated. Stop letting that stuff in. The great part about having so much control over our lives and our perspectives is that we get to choose what gets our time and attention. The tough part though, and it is tough, is that it means we also have to ask ourselves questions that perhaps we don't want to ask.

We have to be honest with ourselves. Like truly honest and the reality is sometimes it hurts to do that. to ask how am I contributing to this pain, this struggle? What am I letting in that needs to be kept outside the gate from now on? And what we often find is that the answers are there. The opportunity is there, sometimes even in plain view. But our attention is often diverted from it and instead allocated to the things that don't even serve us

or align with who we are. We've habitualized finding the problems and not the solutions. I can list examples of this over the course of my life all day, right? Epiphanies where I realized I needed to defend the thoughts that enter my mind and better cultivate a world where I can succeed, where I can be happy. Money, for example, to switch from seeing it as a sense. scarce resource, something that everyone's fighting over, how to outmaneuver the guy to the right of me, how to get my hands on this elusive object. Nope, block that mentality at the gate and let in

instead the idea that money is merely an exchange of value. How can I be more valuable to more people? Where value goes, wealth follows. Or as I've talked about before, the injuries I deal with, so frequently, right? Keeping the poor me, or I can't deal with this, or whining, I'm willing to put in the work, why won't life let me succeed? Keep all that outside the gate and let in, here's an opportunity to get better in other areas. I can't lift. Maybe I'll take a month or two to crush cardio, to eat better, to build mental acuity. Find a way. Or maybe it's that person who made their way into my life that over time became a net negative, that we've gotten to the point where our coexistence takes away more than it adds.

They no longer belong inside the gate in my world, right? Only let in people who do make your life better. And we have control over all of this. It's about accountability. It's about personally understanding the authority you have over what comes in and what stays out. A very few things in life are just because. Things exist in our day to day because we have somewhere along the line allowed them to be there.

So take some time to see yourself as the gatekeeper of your world. Audit what you're letting in and what you're keeping out. To do so will set you up for a life on your terms. A life that's not wasted. or even merely endured, but one that's lived to the fullest. Looking back and understanding what you might have done differently is a source of strength. Awareness is a currency of sorts, but being sorry for yesterday, dwelling on the days gone by, that is a waste of time.

See, those feelings of discontent, the emotions that rise to the surface as our minds sort through that catalog of regret, you know, the emotions that try and pull you back down into the very moment in which they occurred. If you let them lead you by the hand back into a manufactured hell, they will. And down you will go, reliving an expired pain that you can neither prevent nor do anything about. After all, it is the past. But alternatively, if we can do one of the hardest things for humans to do, which is depersonalize the occurrence, remove the emotion and find the value you stand face to face with an advantage in life that is exponential. Not only are you refusing to be defined or

tortured by yesterday, but you're creating a framework by which you can actually use that pain to make a better right now. You're acknowledging that your mistakes are not indicative of a current reflection in the mirror. They're not metal bars keeping you closed in. They're opportunities in disguise. A friend of mine once told me, from our pain comes our purpose. From our despair comes our hope. It's from the times We got it oh so completely wrong that we can now arm ourselves with the ability to get it right. To be better and faster and stronger and wiser. The reality, or life in the big city, as this saying goes, is having to fall in order to rise again.

Because if nothing falls, there are no ashes from which to rebuild. We change when we've lost. We evolve when we're cornered. We become more when life shakes our worldview. There's power in this suffering. That is, if you choose to find it. And that's always a decision that's ours to make. Again, those same memories that can pull you down if you let them

can also be used to elevate yourself. higher than you've ever been. There's just saying that life is 10% what happens to you and 90% what you do about it. And when you think about it, it's obvious. Because knowledge is only as powerful as our willingness to put that knowledge to work. Yesterday's pain, its lessons, can be the very reason you transform, evolve to a higher version of yourself, but that's only if you stop using those lessons as an attack on your self-esteem.

and start seeing them as the gateway to tomorrow. Otherwise, they'll remain that ball and chain around your ankle. Is the mistake that cost you your business, maybe the inaction that fractured a relationship, a swing and miss that hurt your pride somewhere along the way? Are they going to remain sources of pain in your mind, mental images or reflections of where you fell short? Or are they going to fuel the comeback?

sequel. When we fall, we're given one of life's greatest gifts, a part two. Armed with the knowledge we otherwise would never have had, armed with an understanding that with the failures comes the strength. As I've grown, I've placed more and more emphasis on thinking. How do I perceive myself? Because when that slips, life is never too far behind. But when you capture and maintain a healthy perspective, things seem to improve along with, not because thinking makes it so, but because how we think prompts how we act and how we act changes our lives. It's that simple. So the question, okay, that happened. Now what does it mean to you will always be crucial? What are you going to do about it now?

We'll always be imperative. And if you look, you'll find that opportunity everywhere. I was thinking recently about all the books. I've read all the podcasts I consume, and there are a ton, right? But how valuable is that information if I don't act? How much could any of it mean if it's consumed and then forgotten? A memory with an image and a title. I'd be better off reading one good book a year, listening to one podcast and injecting that wisdom into my life immediately, acting on it, using it to manufacture momentum.

If the acting is more important than the knowing, why have I not placed greater emphasis on the action? Like 90% more emphasis. And I think that's a question we should all be asked. And so let's move from the book example back to the thinking, reminiscing about our mistakes, the times we let ourselves down. What are our memories, if not just little novels, where we as the main characters, embark upon the hero's journey? Warriors call to something greater, leaving a previous world, facing our demons, learning about ourselves along the way, perhaps cut short. left without a conclusion, only in need of an ending. And these painful experiences are essentially us walking around with novels unfinished in our heads.

We've done the work, we've learned the lessons, endured the pain. And rather than continuing to revisit that discomfort of the moment, that stopping point, rather than dwelling on how we shut the book after the conflict occurred, Let's open it back up and integrate that value, that lesson into the present. Let's grow from it. Let's evolve because of it. That's what's so beautiful, so exciting about the future. It hasn't happened yet. It's in your control. You're painting that picture now in real time,

and so how convenient that you fell yesterday. Now you have an opportunity to be stronger today. and how incredible that you learned what actions or inaction was not in line with the person you want to be. Now you have an opportunity to root all that out. And how beautiful that you felt the pain of quitting, of stopping short, of throwing the towel. Now, as you push forward into that great unknown, you have a reminder, a benchmark. to compare with the difficulty of the present moment.

You can silence the voice in your head begging you to slow down because you now know what the alternative looks like. To put it simply, you are not the same person you were yesterday. Specifically because of what you've been through, you have those mistakes to thank for the meaningful road you will travel. And let that be the expectation. We don't get through life without mistakes. There is no perfect journey.

And the ones who move courageously into the future know that more than anyone. Life pushes back. The world has a say. And sometimes that means we must be humbled along the way. It means we swing and miss. It means plans fall apart. But you will prevail, maybe not immediately, but eventually, because you perceive the adversity as merely a cost of admission, specifically because you don't let it run loops in your mind.

Rather, you extract the value and transform it into momentum. You are not your past. You are what you decide to make of your brain. standing on that ledge staring out at what we know we need to do at the moment we least want to do it well that's where the future is shaped when procrastination feels like the answer or avoidance the optimal choice where does one draw their strength they say routine is a powerful tool in this fight and i believe that when something becomes habit or part part of the process instilled in the day-to-day, there's just simply less room for negotiation.

We show up with our eyes on the prize. But here's the thing, we are human. There's simply going to be days when the world pushes back. Life is a game of complexity. It's unpredictable. You want to talk about the good days, fine. It's easy to show up when we're feeling good. And thankfully those days outnumber the others, right?

Creating the bulk of our consistency, 10,000 hours. But not all of them. Life is about momentum. Myself, after coming off a pretty terrible weekend for a variety of reasons, I found myself on that ledge again. When the alternative route made itself known, where it felt mighty tempting to call it take a break where my worldview had come into question. I had to ask myself, who are you?

Really? It's easy to rationalize walking away in these moments. In his book The War of Art, Stephen Pressfield says, our job in life is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and becoming. Well, who would have known how much goes into that process of becoming? How committed we have to be to the road before us, and not only when it's sunny, but when the skies are dark and gray.

And how if we allow ourselves in those difficult moments to say, sometimes it's okay to wave the white flag, it's okay to walk away, then you leave the door crue. cracked to make that same decision at any other point in time. Quitting, conceding can very easily become a habit. And a habit we want to avoid at all cost. I have this little rule that no matter what, I can never leave dishes in the sink overnight. Never.

I treat this arbitrary little promise to myself, like it's life or death, which again, random, but hear me out, it's half practical, half symbolic. I know that if I say, okay, just this once, I've effectively removed the barrier separating order from chaos. If it's okay just this once,

then it's okay 1,000 times. And a messy sink becomes a messy kitchen, becomes a messy house, becomes a cluttered mind. Extreme, maybe. but critical, right? Here is where the symbolism comes in. I understand how fragile that divide, how when I'm tired or have a headache or I'm busy,

it's still priority because I want to hammer my subconscious with the understanding that I show up when it's inconvenient. That very moment when I could easily trick myself into thinking it's small or dumb or arbitrary, it's a sink, who cares? Right? That's the moment that I need to bleed into the rest of my life. And I think that's exactly it, right?

The floodwaters are always looking to come in. And how many cracks until the room gives way? You know, when you've had a few rough days, when you've lost something important to you, when you're sad or disappointed about an outcome, what then? When life calls you to exceed expectations, what then? Because the world around you will always give you evidence, support dialing it back, right?

Selling yourself short if that's the case you're looking to make. But here's the deal. Should you choose the inverse, you are strong enough to be better than you've ever been in those challenging moments. You can show up when it hurts. You can reestablish your why and carry forward even after the turbulence of yesterday. Life will never be easy. It will never all make sense. And this understanding has helped me to roll up my sleeves and continue forward. When I'm disappointed with yesterday or overwhelmed by the conditions or landscape of the moment,

when I question how much I have left. But I've found that when I look hard enough, there's always something to draw. And that's the message of note. That's what we must show ourselves. When you're on that ledge, this can be where you're at your best. This is where you get to uncover just how deep-rooted your greatness is. This is where you set the standard and the pace for everything to come. It's not about what happens to you.

No one escapes adversity. No one lives free of discomfort or misfortune or struggle. No, it will always be about what you do with what happens to you. In other words, it's not the event, it's the response. Not the obstacle, but the ability to navigate around it. not the wave, but the ability to ride its momentum to something greater. It is not what happens to you. It is what you do about what happens to you.

The famous Roman emperor and stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius said, you have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will feel. find strength. And I think this realization comes down to the fact that there is always a way, buried underneath it all, something powerful to leverage. But getting to the value calls for a rewiring. A change in the questions that we ask.

Not how could this happen to me, but how can I be better tomorrow than I am now? because of what happened to me. Not can I still be that person or accomplish what I set out to. But I am that person. Now how will I adjust my path so that I get there? We're operating within a world of value, limitless opportunity.

The difficulty simply pushes us to that value faster, expedites the process. process it forces us to open our eyes and see that the world works for us so you take for example the fear of starting something new at fear it doesn't have to be an end point or a red light indicator fear doesn't mean you're not qualified or prepared or equipped it simply lets you know that you have finally a required the courage to step out of the safety of the only world you knew and into the turbulence of growth.

On to the path of something better. And where it's easy to move away from that feeling. To turn your back on the chaos and retreat to something simpler. Maybe something more predictable or contained. What if you viewed the fear as the price that we all have to pay to pull the curtain back on the best things life has to offer. Changing the question from will I be afraid to instead, this is important. This is meaningful. Therefore, it's inevitable that I will experience fear, but what will I do about it? How will I conduct myself amidst the fear? Will I continue forward?

Those are the questions that contain the value. Right? I can't keep the water from rising or the walls from caving in. No, that's an inevitability where I'm going. The worthwhile road always has its adversity. But will I use that water to learn to swim? The walls to climb, to adapt and scale, what will I make of this? That's the question that becomes the difference. And sure, you could stay away. You could choose not. to take the path that presents the danger and the turbulence. You can attempt to contain the world around you by simply refusing to experience it. But then, of course, you become presented with the question,

why intentionally refuse to cash in a winning lottery ticket? Why diminish your gift in such a way? If it's not what you look at, it's what you see. Why see the world as an adversary? Why see yourself as less than you are? The saying goes, when you fight for your limitations, you get to keep them. You'll never exceed the person you've decided yourself to be. And yes, the world can feel intimidating.

It's unknown. You in many ways can't control the characteristics that make life what it is, But you can always control you. Just like you can't control the wind, but you can adjust your sails. You can control the tides, but you can predict and plan and execute accordingly. You control you, and that is where the power is. And of course there's going to be times where that's hard to see. When it's not your first instinct to find the value.

Take for an example, a change. a loss, the end of a relationship, the point where people tend to feel their lowest, it hurts to have something and lose it, to have what you were once so sure about challenged, what you once believed in called into question. But this doesn't have to be a referendum on you as a human being. Sure, you made your mistakes,

but you have the opportunity to dwell on them or to acknowledge them and ask the question, I know what I know now, how can I be better than I've ever been in my life? How can I position myself to get more of the good and less of the bad, same idea, different context? When those walls feel like they're crumbling down, you have to know there is more on the other side, just beyond what the eye can see.

And this isn't just an idea I play around with in my head. I make a concentrated effort to think this every time something goes wrong. When my first reaction is emotional, my first emotion is anger or frustration. It's like, take a breath, compose yourself, and start looking for the value. Because here's the truth, the world is not going to end today. There's going to be a time down the road when I look over my shoulder, and right now is a distant memory. What will I have done with it? And it's the times that might have broken you that contain the greatest transformation.

I like to say the greatest tragedies or the hardest times made me who I am today. The losses taught me that I had everything I needed. The failures showed me what I'm capable of enduring. The times I was let down taught me to depersonalize the shift. the shortcomings of others, but to simultaneously hedge against them. The times I was lost showed me we only discover or meet our potential when we leave the little day-to-day realities that we create. Why?

Because we are in control. Not of the external, but the internal. And that ends up being a bridge to a reality that means something. So when you find yourself at the base of a mountain looking up, understand that there are two ways to perceive the climb. You can see it as the gravity pushing down on you as Earth standing in your way. Or as an opportunity to ascend to a version of yourself that previously not only didn't exist but wasn't available. This is your opportunity.

The same opportunity that the vast majority of the world would disregard or misinterpret, that most would feel fear of and be dissuaded by. Most would live in the stories about who they aren't and what they aren't capable of. But not you. You didn't place that mountain before you, but you sure can't extract the value from it. All you have to do is decide that you're capable and that the meaning and the value and the freedom of tomorrow means more than the discomfort of today. If you allow that for yourself, you will become truly unstoppable. Not because the path simplified or got easier, but because the traveler trusted himself to walk down it.

In John Maxwell's book, The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, he talks about momentum. And how the saying, if you can't take the heat, then get out of the kitchen, doesn't quite get it right. Advocating that it should instead be, if you can't create the heat, then get out of the kitchen. And being that we are all leaders in our own lives, I think. he hits on something that none of us should overlook. The power of momentum, of not waiting but creating, reminding ourselves that we are not spectators, sitting in the stands and simply reacting to, or complaining about the events taking place below.

No, we have the ability to change the things we do not like and create the ones that don't yet exist when we know they should. Too much of the time we react to that metaphorical heat in the kitchen, as John alludes to, forgetting that we can dial it up or down. We're not only characters that have been created, we are ourselves creators. I talk a lot about mental shifts that have changed my life and there are plenty. But perhaps the most important was the realization that I can do something about the things I don't like. And I know that sounds simple, probably even obvious. But I look back at various stages of my life and I'm blown away by the amount of things I tolerated for years and years simply because I gave it no thought.

There were so many questions that I never asked, so many opportunities I never explored. until I realized, hey, you can stop accepting those things you don't want. It's amazing the power of a simple list that was created. Two columns. Left side, all the things that bothered me. That I wasn't happy with, or that I knew should be there that had been lacking. And then on the right column, what I'm going to do about it, every single item. Each one. What's the step I'm going to take?

And I just poured my heart onto that paper, and it's like you look down and feel like you have finally moved into the driver's seat. There's something incredible about knowing that you have taken control, something satisfying, knowing that you're not just accepting what falls out of the sky and lands in your hands. Especially since we seem to have this proclivity to box ourselves in. Human beings are amazing in their ability to adapt. But the danger is when we adapt to and normalize a reality that falls short of what matters to us. The danger is in forgetting that nothing happens without momentum, and momentum is self-made. One of my favorite stories is about a man walking through the circus. And he sees these enormous elephants.

each with one end of a rope tied around one of their legs, and the other end of that rope connected to a chair. The man, as he's walking by, he's curious, asked one of the trainers, Hey, isn't that dangerous? Couldn't the elephant easily break free and get away if he wanted? And the trainer says no. See, we started doing this when they were baby elephants. And when they were babies, they couldn't physically break free. They weren't strong enough.

And so over the years, as they grew and became bigger, stronger, it never dawned on them that by simply pulling on that rope or walking away, they could break free. These chains might as well be invisible. And that's what they were. Mental. The rope wasn't keeping the elephants to the chair. The elephants were keeping the elephants to the chair.

And there's something there in that message for all of us. For some of us in this particular moment, maybe it's big picture. For others, maybe we're at a season of life where it's simply creating momentum in some type of smaller capacity. And I travel through these ups and downs personally all the time. I think that's a healthy thing. It's a sign that you're looking for that growth. You're checking the world around you for those imaginary ropes. Recently I went through a period where I just felt too long had gone by without something significant happening.

I needed to create momentum. And so I asked, well, who was I reaching out to? How was I pushing myself? What was I doing that scared me? What was I doing that was growing? How could I take things up a level? All these little levers of opportunity are all around us. But we have to know to look for them, to see them.

and pull. And it's truly an incredible thing. You do that and you start to feel the movement underneath you, the momentum, the excitement because you're trying new things, you're taking new risks, talking to new people. And that's how that snowball grows. We have to realize that we are mighty big elephants perpetually tied to these comically small chairs. We have to create that heat in the kitchen because we're not only capable, we are ready. We are equipped to move forward. See, the moment is never going to be perfect. The momentum will never come to be on its own. Those things wait. They wait for you to stop watching life go by and click start on the stop watch. Yeah, time has always ticked away, but it will never mean as much as it's about to now.

Tick whispers the opportunity. Signifying that in order to evolve, we must decide we are bold enough to go where we have not yet gone and strong enough to leave some things behind, to choose to accept some discomfort in its impermanence instead of a regret that is forever. And that's It's a trade that demands we look into the future and find value in the unseen. It's a move that says the seconds ticking by mean too much to dishonor them by not making the most of what's around you. And those answers are always there. At the end of the day, that's what it's all about, right?

We make decisions without even realizing we're making them. To accept the current moment as fate? is to choose what you're given over what is possible, over everything that's out there available for you. It's never too late to pull on that rope around your foot. To be who you, as the saying goes, might have been. Know that in your world, nothing consistently shows up or exists without your stamp of approval.

That will always be true. Nothing carries on without you allowing it. to do so and that understanding will be the difference between the ground level and the exponential heights you are capable of reach. The creation, the email, the phone call, the ride, the book, the period of time, the step out, the door, any and all of life's seemingly unremarkable characteristics. Within them is your ticket to greatness. Just know that you have to be the one.

that winds the clock. You are the sun around which everything else revolves, the architect that makes something of value from them. There will always be momentum where you decide there should be momentum. So pick your head up, open the door, and step out into the world of potential that await. I made it part of my morning routine to go outside, have a cup of coffee, and listen to this app that gives you basically 15 minutes summaries of books. It kind of randomizes it for me.

And this morning, the one that came on was called How to Talk to Anyone. And there was a part that really stuck out to me, talked about being methodical about who you interact with, particularly in a social setting. The idea being that you don't need to be some type of polished politician to be able to navigate a party or work a room. And it goes into planning. The idea like eating before the gathering or parties, so while you're there, you can focus on connecting with the people you want to connect with, getting the most out of your time there. That type of thing makes sense. But the line or the way it was summed up that really got me was,

In that situation, be the chooser, not the choice. Pretty powerful framing there, right? Think about how often when we don't ask ourselves what an ideal ending is, what we want, and we simply show up and go with the flow, we're actually forfeiting our ability to shape the outcome of the evening. It's instead going to be shaped by the people who do have a preference. and act accordingly. In other words, we're willingly signing up to be a part of their plan.

We're signing on to be the choice and not, as the passage says, the chooser. Like so many things, you know, you can take a single idea or concept from one area and pointed at something else, right? It applies across the board. How many places in our lives are we just going along without any visualized outcome or goal?

In what areas are we showing up to the metaphorical gathering with no ideal outcome in mind? Hoping the right people come to us. The right things appear to us. And of course, you know, life is messy. No plan's going to be perfect. But there's plenty of truth to that old saying you can't hit a target that you haven't created. That isn't there. And if you don't take the wheel and these little segments,

of your life, you can't then be disappointed when things don't happen, when the car doesn't go where you wanted it to go. No, the one holding the wheel will determine that. Now, let's be real, identifying what you want and pursuing it is definitely more challenging, right? It takes more effort and sacrifice, it's emotionally taxing, because now there's something at stake. But you also position yourself to now get something worthwhile out of the situation. a situation that you otherwise would have had very little control over, right? I've referenced a few times my eighth grade teacher telling us, never to hold our hands up to the sky.

And he would clasp his hands together to make this little bowl and hold them out. But he'd say never just hold them out and hope something falls into them. As the saying goes, hope is not a strategy. And I think there are different levels to this for sure. It's one thing to never think about what you want in life at all. It's another thing to walk into a party and snack on the pretzels instead of connecting with someone, right? They're very different. But when we understand that underneath both of them, underneath all of it, the same principle apply.

We can at least recognize where they're happening in our lives. Some small, some bigger and perhaps more important. layers to a cake. But why wouldn't it always be beneficial to ask yourself, one, what matters, and two, what can I do to bring me closer to what matters? At least then you're cognizant. I think often the greatest opportunities lost are lost simply because we're not aware of them. So if we make ourselves aware and we miss the opportunity, let's make sure we missed it because we looked it in the eye and chose. no. We met that additional layer of resistance and still said no thank you, right? There's

intentionality to it. I remember reading Darren Hardy's book, The Compound Effect, and he's someone that is apparently incredibly meticulous about everything he does, to the point where he would write out a description for his future significant other. Like if it were a dream world, the exact person he was hoping to spend the rest of his life with, from her eyes. color, hair, what she enjoyed doing, all that stuff. And, you know, it goes to show you the difference a few years can make. The first time I read that, I thought, well, that's way too extreme. I skipped right over it.

Now I look at that and I'm like, yeah, he's just creating an ideal. So that in the real, tangible world, he can put himself in the best position to attract that person. He's creating a goal. Otherwise, what's the alternative? You just kind of walk around and hope someone appears around a corner someday who aligns with you and what you want and your interests and it's rolling dice. There are just too many variables in life to constantly be wishing or crossing your fingers, leaving things up to chance or fate.

There has to be some general sense of direction. And I've had this kind of miniature epiphany in many aspects of my life. For example, you know, business, I've been asked, but what do you want it to look like the next five years? It used to be, well, five years a long time away. Do I really need to know? And it's like, if you don't know, then what are you doing today? You're just repeating what you've always done? Are you acting randomly? And hoping it takes you somewhere that will make you happy down the road? No, you have a vision. And as Bezos has said, you hold the vision and you continually adjust the process.

Again, life is messy. Things will change five million times and that's okay, but there's a better chance good things will happen to you if you identify what they are and seek them out. Even smaller example, Boston, my home, I lived there, I love the people there. But, you know, five years ago, I was at a point where my work was remote, my team was remote. So rather than simply endure, you know, November to June every year, I ask myself, well, what's my ideal lifestyle? like. What if I design around that? Why not move somewhere that really excites me? Now I can run in the heat in January in Miami. That's not a small thing in my life. That makes me a lot happier. And so it's little things like that. You know, you get the point from the big things to the tiny details. If you don't choose what you want or choose your path, life will simply choose it for you. And you know,

And that may or may not be in line with what makes you happen. Or the idea, as many of us have heard in a different way, if you don't pursue your dreams, you will undoubtedly spend your days working to help someone else build theirs. Without you taking control, taking initiative, life will, and you will become a pawn on the chessboard of life. So ask the questions. You know, look in the mirror and delve into the aspirin,

of the person looking back at you. From social events, sure, to your significant other, to your work or business, to your overall life goal. What matters to you? In these various arenas of your life, what does success look like? What does fulfillment feel like?

And once you have that blueprint in your mind, you are now on the road to ensuring ensuring its construction. The construction not of a world you were given, but of a world you chose.