Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - "What we THINK, We BECOME" || MORNING MOTIVATION || Best Motivational Speeches 2022

Episode Date: July 22, 2022

"You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending" - C.S. Lewis

It's not about what happens to you. No one escapes adversity. No one lives free of discomfort or misfortune or struggle. No, it will always be about what you do with what happens to you. In other words, it's not the event, it's the response. Not the obstacle, but the ability to navigate around it. Not the wave, but the ability to ride its momentum to something greater. It is not what happens to you.

It is what you do about what happens to you. The famous Roman emperor and stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius said, you have power over your mind, not outside events. realize this and you will find strength. And I think this realization comes down to the fact that there is always a way, buried underneath it all, something powerful to leverage. But getting to the value calls for rewiring. A change in the questions that we ask.

Not how could this happen to me, but how can I be better tomorrow than I'm. I am now because of what happened to me. Not can I still be that person or accomplish what I set out to. But I am that person. Now how will I adjust my path so that I get there? We're operating within a world of value, limitless opportunity. The difficulty simply pushes us to that value faster. expedites the process.

It forces us to open our eyes and see that the world works for us. So you take, for example, the fear of starting something new. That fear, it doesn't have to be an end point or a red light indicator. Fear doesn't mean you're not qualified or prepared or equipped. It simply lets you know.

that you have finally acquired the courage to step out of the safety of the only world you knew and into the turbulence of growth. On to the path of something better. And where it's easy to move away from that feeling, to turn your back on the chaos and retreat to something simpler, maybe something more predictable or contained. What if you viewed the fear as the price that we all have to pay? to pull the curtain back on the best things life has to offer. Changing the question from will I be afraid to instead this is important, this is meaningful.

Therefore, it's inevitable that I will experience fear, but what will I do about it? How will I conduct myself amidst the fear? Will I continue forward? Those are the questions that contain that. value right I can't keep the water from rising or the walls from caving in no that's an inevitability where I'm going the worthwhile road always has its adversity but will I use that water to learn to swim the walls to climb to adapt and scale what will I make of this that's the question that becomes the difference and sure you could

stay away, you could choose not to take the path that presents the danger and the turbulence. You could attempt to contain the world around you by simply refusing to experience it. But then, of course, you become presented with the question, why intentionally refuse to cash in a winning lottery ticket? Why diminish your gift in such a way? If it's not what you look at, it's what you see. Why see you see you? the world as an adversary. Why see yourself as less than you are? The saying goes, when you fight for your limitations, you get to keep them. You'll never exceed the person you've decided yourself to be. And yes, the world can feel intimidating. It's unknown. You in many ways can't

control the characteristics that make life what it is, but you can always control you. Just like you can't control the wind, but you can adjust your sails. You can't control the tides, but you can predict and plan and execute accordingly. You control you, and that is where the power is. And of course there's going to be times where that's hard to see, when it's not your first instinct to find the value. Take for an example, a change, a loss, the end of a relationship, the point where people tend to feel their lowest. It hurts to have something and lose it. To have what you were once so sure about challenged, what you once believed in called into question. But this doesn't have to be a referendum on you as a human being, right?

Sure, you made your mistakes, but you have the opportunity to dwell on them or to acknowledge them and ask the question, I know what I know now, how can I be better than I've ever been in my life? How can I position myself to get more of the good and less of the bad, same idea, different context? When those walls feel like they're crumbling down, you have to know there is more on the other side, just beyond what the eye can see. And this isn't just an idea I play around with my head. I make a concentrated effort to think this every time something goes wrong. When my first

reaction is emotional, my first emotion is anger or frustration. It's like take a breath, compose yourself, and start looking for the value. Because here's the truth, the world is not going to end today. There's going to be a time down the road when I look over my shoulder and right now is a distant memory. What will I have done with it? And it's the times that might have broken you that contain the greatest transformation. I like to say the greatest tragedies or the hardest times made me who I am today. The losses taught me that I had everything I needed.

The failures showed me what I'm capable of enduring. The times I was let down taught me to depersonalize the shortcomings of others, but to simultaneously hedge against them. The times I was lost showed me we only discover or meet our potential when we leave the little day-to-day realities that we create. Why? Because we are in control. Not of the external, but the internal, and that ends up being a bridge to a reality

that means something. So when you find yourself at the base of a mountain looking up, understand that there are two ways to perceive the climb. You can see it as the gravity pushing down on you as Earth standing in your way. Or as an opportunity to ascend to a version of yourself that previously not only didn't exist, but wasn't available. This is your opportunity. The same opportunity that the vast majority of the world would disregard or misinterpret,

that most would feel fear of and be dissuaded by. Most would live in the stories about who they aren't and what they aren't capable of. But not you. You didn't place that mountain before you, but you sure can't extract the value from it. All you have to do is decide that you're capable and that the meaning and the value and the freedom of tomorrow means more than the discomfort of today. If you allow that for yourself, you will become truly unstoppable. Not because the path simplified or got easier, but because the traveler trusted himself to walk down it. What does it mean to be a little better every single day?

James Clearers noted that if each day you improve by only 1%, you'll be a full 37 times better in a year. That's an almost unfathomable number. Unbelievable transformation. Imagine being 37 times better at what it is you're looking to improve on. 37 times more efficient or skilled. All because of a 1% per day commitment. Almost sounds too good to be true.

Here's the catch though. 1% doesn't seem like much. Which is good, one might think. You know, that should make it easier. Well, sort of. The easier and more seemingly trivial something is to accomplish, the easier it is to dismiss it as well. We've all been there that,

maybe not today, maybe tomorrow. No big deal. We don't lose anything. And that's what we must learn to wrestle with. Jim Rohn puts it this way. He says being successful is easy. The issue is that being unsuccessful is easy too. Saying yes to the little things you know you need to do is easy.

But so is saying no. Putting your phone away to work on something of substance, yeah, that's pretty easy. But watching just one more TikTok or Instagram or YouTube video, that's easy too. Putting your shoes on, going for a walk or run, heading to the gym. Hey, procedurally, pretty easy. Not that complex, but talking yourself into just going tomorrow instead. Also a rationalization that's pretty easy. And that's essentially the question, which easy are you going to go with?

How do you put yourself in position to select the right easy? Well like so many things, it starts with the worldview and flows out to the tangible actions we take in support of that worldview. things first. We have to know that the biggest advantage available is seeing the small things as so much more than small things. It's refusing to fall victim to the disappointment and burnout associated with hoping for one huge jump, a miracle solution, the answer that will change everything. That's deceiving. Winning looks small and consistent. Progress is boring, it's mundane, it looks like deciding on what matters,

and then making a pact with yourself every day to keep your own promises. When most would fall off or push things to tomorrow, it's seeing your commitment as everything, knowing that the people who manufacture significance in their lives, they treat what others would call silly and trivial, as life and death. They make the details into the whole storyline. So yeah, it might be easy for someone else to walk away.

But when you have given yourself no other option but to succeed, the little steps to make it happen requires zero thought or internal deliberation. The person who gets into shape over the course of six months, they're not going to be the one who found a secret diet, bought a piece of equipment on Amazon. They didn't do the necessary thing here and there when they had their fleeting moments of inspiration. No, they made better, consistent decisions. No to the soda, yes to the water, no to the alarm, yes to the run, no to the Netflix and yes to the gym.

Both options were easy in the moments in which they arose. But each time only one option mattered. And that's what it's about. tying the prolonged gratification to something that means the world to you, where each step is not just a step, but one step closer to the moon. So no, it's certainly not that a can of Coke or dessert or the day off will kill you, but flip the narrative. It's that when you do stay true to your mission and the promises you make to yourself,

you get something so much more back. It's not, oh, what will I lose by skipping this 1%? No, in a world where excellence compounds, it's look what I am becoming. And this decision is an investment too good to pass up. And every decision to move forward, to embrace the things that align with your true North, is a nod.

to that future self. The world, it needs you. But it needs the real you. Not the one with the mask looking to blend in, nor the one making all those concessions to avoid being left out. No, the real you. With your flaws and your insufficiencies,

your strengths and your gifts, your hopes and your dreams. It needs the you that so often hides away underneath that blanket of caution and skepticism. The you that's coupled with vulnerability. More easily ignored than brought to life with conviction, but that's the you this world needs. When I was younger, I seemed to separate life into two categories.

me in one and everyone else and the other. And guess which of the two categories I assumed had it all figured out? In my mind, I was the one, the only one who didn't know. The one who was winging it, stumbling my way to reach and every day. All those other people, though, they not only had plans, they had the right plans. They knew the right details. But I didn't. And so in my head, me being right required I necessarily look to them.

I follow their lead. Since there exists an established, correct path, that must be where I steer the ship. But then some time passes. You grow older, maybe pick up a little wisdom along the way. And you realize that no one really knows what they're doing. doing. There are very few objectively correct roads that must be traveled. Life is not a paint by number, it's a blank canvas. And understanding this changed the image in my head from one of me knocking on the door of a party everyone else was at to visualizing almost 8 billion individual souls

running around trying to figure things out in the limited stretch of time they have here on planet Earth. I realized I had at times felt small only because of the gravity I attributed to people who were just trying to figure it out themselves. And the point, certainly not to diminish anyone else's journey, it was to give myself permission to embark upon my own. It's just hard to do that when you view everyone else is one collective all-knowing entity.

As opposed to 8 billion people just like you with thoughts, fears, hopes, and plans. The question is not what is the right thing to do here. The question is, when will you allow yourself to venture out into the world and find what the right thing means for you? That's what's required. And the world will be better for you. You having found it, because after all, no one sees life like you do. No one has the background or worldview.

The universe has conspired to put you as you are here now. Almost an impossible occurrence in and of itself. How easy that is to forget. We were born on the summit, yet the inclination for some reason is to keep our eyes closed. No, open them. Take it all in. Allow the view to propel you forward. The world needs you. It needs you with your mistakes that have helped you evolve into the person you could never have been without them. It needs you with your worries and your fears. Conquering them will be pivotal in your evolution.

It needs you with your flaws and blemishes. How else would life convince you that the things that make you different are the things that you are the evolution? are the same things that make you strong. It doesn't matter how many people tell you or try to explain to you the magnitude of what's at your feet. Life does not begin until you allow yourself to start living. Until you realize that yesterday does not define you. And the categories in which you've placed yourself,

they're transitory. The past is not the reason you can or can't begin again. It's not who you are forever. No, it's the advantage you now possess as you move forward. Should you choose to move forward? It's in realizing you are bound by nothing that you free yourself. And for the one wondering, why does it matter what I think? Why should I start or try or risk anything?

Why should I pick up the brush and start painting on that canvas before me? Well, because that step is where it all begins, the meaning, the purpose, it's all predicated upon our willingness to pick that brush up and start painting. You ask what's the point? The point is everything. One detail at a time, we dismantle our previously held notions about what life is supposed to be and finally start living one that matters. No one's masterpiece will look like yours.

No one's depiction of life will follow the same parameters you've etched onto that canvas. In fact, there are people that will be changed forever because you chose to live your life fully. There are lives of those around you that will be transformed because you picked up the brush. There are stories that will now end in triumph because you found the courage to start, to see light in yourself. being fulfilled and the world being better off they're not two different things when you live a life true to yourself when you let go of the half-toes and step into the get-toes the world experiences the luxury of the beauty that comes next when you fill your cup up first you're able to then replenish those around you

that's not nothing so who are you the characterizations, beneath the roles you've taken on, beneath what you feel you're supposed to be. All that. Who are you and will you give life to that person? Will you be that courageous? After all, that's what life is. It's not a game of right and wrong so much as it's a game of courage.

The ones willing to take the leap end up worlds away from where they began. So my ask of you is that you begin tearing down those walls created in your head. The ones that accumulated over days and months and years. The ones that box you in or keep you out that suggest you are anything other than that one in four hundred trillion miracle. Ready to embark upon the right of a lifetime. And sure, it means shedding the comfort of obscurity. the safety of projection.

Looking yourself in the mirror and saying, I am worth it. And there's more out there means without question you are taking off the training wheels, dancing with vulnerability. But it also means when that time comes and you look back on how you lived your days,

you can say I truly, you can say that the world needed me. And I had the courage to heed. it's calm. I made it part of my morning routine to go outside, have a cup of coffee, and listen to this app

that gives you basically 15 minutes summaries of books. It kind of randomizes it for me. And this morning, the one that came on was called How to Talk to Anyone. And there was a part that really stuck out to me,

talked about being methodical about who you interact with. particularly in a social setting, the idea being that you don't need to be some type of polished politician to be able to navigate a party or work a room. And it goes into, you know, planning. The idea, like eating before the gathering or parties. So while you're there, you can focus on connecting with the people you want to connect with, getting the most out of your time there. That type of thing makes sense. But the line or the way it was summed up that really got me was in that situation,

be the chooser, not the choice. Pretty powerful framing there, right? Think about how often when we don't ask ourselves what an ideal ending is, what we want, and we simply show up and go with the flow, we're actually forfeiting our ability to shape the outcome of the evening. It's instead going to be shaped by the people who do have a preference and act accordingly. In other words, we're willingly signing up to be a part of their plan. We're signing on to be the choice and not, as the passage says, the chooser.

Like so many things, you know, you can take a single idea or concept from one area and pointed at something else, right? It applies across the board. How many places in our lives are we just going along without any visualized outcome or goal? In what areas are we showing up to the metaphorical gathering with no ideal outcome in mind? Hoping the right people come to us. The right things appear to us. And of course, life is messy. No plan's going to be perfect.

But there's plenty of truth to that old saying, you can't hit a touch. target that you haven't created, that isn't there. And if you don't take the wheel in these little segments of your life, you can't then be disappointed when things don't happen, when the car doesn't go where you wanted it to go. No, the one holding the wheel will determine that. Now, let's be real. Identifying what you want and pursuing it is definitely more challenging, right? It takes more effort and sacrifice.

It's emotionally taxing. because now there's something at stake. But you also position yourself to now get something worthwhile out of the situation. A situation that you otherwise would have had very little control over, right? I've referenced a few times my eighth grade teacher telling us never to hold our hands up to the sky. And he would clasp his hands together to make this little bowl and hold them out. But he'd say never just hold them out and hope something falls into them. As the saying goes, hope is not a strategy, and I think there are different levels to this for sure.

It's one thing to never think about what you want in life at all. It's another thing to walk into a party and snack on the pretzels instead of connecting with someone, right? They're very different. But when we understand that underneath both of them, underneath all of it, the same principle applies. We can at least recognize where there are. happening in our lives, some small, some bigger and perhaps more important, layers to a cake. Why wouldn't it always be beneficial to ask yourself, one, what matters, and two, what can I do to bring me closer to what matters? At least then you're cognizant. I think often the greatest

opportunities lost are lost simply because we're not aware of them. So if we make ourselves aware and we miss the opportunity, let's make sure we missed it because we looked it in the eye and chose no. We met that additional layer of resistance and still said no thank you, right? There's intentionality to it. I remember reading Darren Hardy's book, The Compound Effect, and he's someone that is apparently incredibly meticulous about everything he does to the point where he would write out a description for his future significant other.

Like if it were a dream world, the exact person he was hoping to spend the rest of his life with, from her eye color, hair, what she enjoyed doing, all that stuff. And, you know, it goes to show you the difference a few years can make. The first time I read that, I thought, well, that's way too extreme. I skipped right over it. Now I look at that and I'm like, yeah, he's just creating an ideal. So that in the real, tangible world,

he can put himself in the best position to attract that person. He's creating a goal. Otherwise, what's the alternative? You just kind of walk around and hope someone appears around a corner someday who aligns with you and what you want and your interests and it's rolling dice. There are just too many variables in life to constantly be wishing or crossing your fingers, leaving things up to chance or fate. There has to be some general sense.

of direction. And I've had this kind of miniature epiphany in many aspects of my life. For example, you know, business, I've been asked, but what do you want it to look like the next five years? It used to be, well, five years a long time away. Do I really need to know? And it's like, if you don't know, then what are you doing today? You're just repeating what you've always done? Are you acting randomly? And hoping it takes you somewhere that will make you happy down the road? No, you have a vision and as Bezos has said, you hold the vision and you continually adjust the process. Again, life is messy. Things will change five million times and that's okay, but there's a better chance good things will happen to you if you identify what they are and seek them out.

Even smaller example, Boston, my home, I lived there, I love the people there. But, you know, five years ago, I was at a point where my work was remote, my team was remote. So rather than simply endure, you know, November to June every year, I ask myself, well, what's my ideal lifestyle like? What if I design around that? Why not move somewhere that really excites me? Now I can run in the heat in January in Miami. That's not a small thing in my life.

That makes me a lot happier. And so it's little things like that. You know, you get the point from the big things to the tiny details. If you don't choose what you want or choose your path, life will simply choose it for you. And that may or may not be in line with what makes you happen. Or the idea, as many of us have heard in a different way, if you don't pursue your dreams, you will undoubtedly spend your days working to help someone else build theirs. Without you taking control, taking initiative, life will, and you will become a pawn on the chessboard of life.

So ask the questions. You know, look in the mirror and delve into the aspirations of the person looking back at you. From social events, sure, to your significant other, to your work or business, to your overall life goal. What matters to you? In these various arenas of your life, what does success look like? What is fulfillment feel like? And once you have that blueprint in your mind, you are now on the road to ensuring its construction.

The construction, not of a world you were given, but of a world you chose. There's something to the idea or act of stepping out of the limelight to work on yourself. To quote unquote disappear for a particular period of time, so that with a laser-like focus, you're able to build and develop the skills

that will make you great at what it is you want to do. In a sense, we're not created out in the world, as much as we're created by what we do behind the scenes. The thousands of hours spent dedicating ourselves to a craft. We enhance our value and capability doing the often monotonous, un-glamorous things day in and day out, and those results out in the world are merely a reflection of that work. And that's what makes excelling in any given area so challenging.

There's something counterintuitive about performing to an audience of one. Dancing to no applause, exhausting time, and energy, resources, so that, you know, you can cling to a promise. But that's also why excellence will always be reserved for a few. Open to everyone. But ultimately, a few end up there, right? The same way a finish line is open to everyone. But ultimately reserved only for those willing to put in the hundreds, if not thousands of practice miles,

to start the race, run the race, and complete the race. there's a substantial amount of sacrifice involved. The outside world is its own chess game. It requires courage and innovation and a willingness to step into its great unknown. But ideally, in doing so, one would be armed with the competency they've acquired when no one is looking.

It's a result of their own dedication and commitment. And I actually started thinking about this during a Q&A I did recently, where someone asked if I had any thoughts on how they could start a speaking career. I'm actually happy to give my thoughts. First and foremost, understand it's a long play. So be willing to endure that bumpy road, that journey. There's no magic formula that makes you an MLK-esque order overnight, right? You work forever to capture a fragment of that excellence. and someone kind of chimed in,

given me a hard time. You know, we know, we know, Eddie, you hate marketing. And I'm like, marketing, it took me a second to connect the dots. How is this related? And the light bulb went off, and I kind of laughed because I do bash marketing quite a bit. And I think what they were getting to is I'm always talking about the long game, right? I'm always talking about working on yourself, the back end, the deep work, chiseling yourself into something. that's unique, authentically you, extraordinary in its own right.

Or being so good as the saying goes, they can't ignore you. But at the same time, it would be pretty ridiculous and stupid for me to say marketing is not important. Marketing's pivotal. Engrained in some capacity in everything we touch, you have to be able to effectively communicate why something is valuable, obviously. But I think there is, I mean, misconception and genuine misunderstanding in today's day and age with regard to adding value. With regard to rising to the top of a niche or making an impact, you know, we see flashy

posts and ads and videos and think, ah, that's the target. But that's just the mechanism for communication. That's the bullhorn. That's not the value ad. In Cal Newport's deep work, He mentions how difficult it's becoming for us to break away from the social media and the push notifications and the emails and in solitude do the kind of work that really moves the needle that propels our greatness and makes us better at what it is we're looking to be great at. We officially exist in a world of distraction. where perhaps the greatest challenge now is how do we disconnect?

How do we turn off? How do we slip into a state of deep work so that we can grow as people? And then, sure, you market that competency once it's acquired. But the goal is not to be a society screaming into a void trying to sell boxes of air. We simply can't afford to leave substance behind. Value is ultimately what makes the world go round, and it's created, again, outside of the limelight. And look, there's going to be some bias to my approach

based on the path that I chose to take. This has worked for me, so I stand by it. I advocate for it. And surely there are some very talented people that disagree with me, and that's great. But I've always had the arrow pointed at what I want to do, what I want all this to mean at 45 years old, 55 years old. And right now, looking back, it's all the hours I spent writing in solitude, or giving speeches to a wall in a studio apartment, recording and re-recording, adjusting my approach.

It's reps, reps, reps, that to me is what matters now. That's what I'm most thankful for. And some time is past, and as I transition into a new phase, now sure, I can get help and start blasting posts all over social media. That's easy. But the important thing is that I have a foundation to stand on. The posts are not the product. The craft is the product.

And I want everyone to at least, whether they agree with me or not, understand that distinction. The million-dollar question, the differentiator is what is your value at? If you can ask yourself that, right, what is the one thing I want to be the best in the world at? Where is my North Star? And then spend every day,

at least some time every day, chipping away at that, you'll be unstoppable, but truly chipping away. Not feeling the need to share every detail with an audience or capture every second of what you're building behind the scenes. Now, turn the cameras off, breathe, focus. Be private for at least a portion of your day.

I think you'll find in that space this beautiful opportunity to reflect and build and step into an evolved version of yourself. Don't be scared to disappear and come back better equipped. Don't be hesitant to go work on your own. yourself. If you're talking substantive impact, true value add, it's always the people willing to put in the hours to do the things that most people are not willing to do, target, identify the areas that make the difference, and then hammer those repeatedly. And look, I get it.

You have to, in a lot of cases, give up some of the now in order to reach an ambitious goal in the future. It's a tradeoff. It's hard. But life is about trade-offs. And maybe this message isn't for everyone. But if you're listening to this and you want to achieve some semblance of excellence in a given area, it's inescapable. It means falling in love with the pursuit that's time intensive. It means showing up and putting in the hours often for little short-term validation.

It means solitude, because getting better is more important than attention. One of my favorite quotes is, confidence is earned. Will you earn that confidence by showing up and committing to the things that truly matter that make you stronger? Sometimes we must step back to leap forward, disappear as we are in order to reappear as we wish to be real work happens when no one is around you can you trust yourself enough to bet on that process believe in that road in that journey if yes you'll position yourself for opportunities and experiences that exceed your wildest

imagination it makes perfect sense in our busy lives that we sometimes lose sight of fundamental truths. At least from time to time, that's part of being human. And I want to talk about an important one. The tendency to forget that parts make a whole. Sounds simple, sounds obvious, not so much. That pieces make a stack, that little actions create big change. And I can tell you that every time in my life I've found myself in trouble or overwhelmed or intimidated,

It's because that very simple concept has eluded me. You know, and all I can see in the moment is how far I have to go. All I can see is this big, intimidating result, and I'm not there. And I want to tell a quick story to provide some context. Those of you who have seen my videos, you probably guessed it, it's running related. But if you're not a runner, hang tight because this is not in any way specific to running, specific to running. It's just a good way to articulate the message and you'll see that. So the realization occurred a few days ago doing a distance run down A1A, which is just a long,

straight stretch down the coast of Florida. It's perfect to kind of zone out and just run. And that's exactly what I must have been doing, zoning out because as I'm, you know, pretty far along, realize that they were kind of closing off the street. There were people lining the sidewalks. There was some kind of organized event, realized that I couldn't go back the same way that I came up. So had to run up the beach. And it was one of those things where we've all been there, right? The idea was great. Our body didn't necessarily like it. It just was one of those days. It did not feel good. And I was really trudging my way forward. And I noticed that every time I thought about the distance I needed to travel, I felt worse.

You know that feeling when you're uncomfortable? It's the thought of having to endure that for a long period of time that's most taxing. Sure, right now it's uncomfortable, but what creates the anxiety is that it goes on for a long period of time. We don't see an end to the immediate. We can't stop thinking about the space between where we are and where we have to be. So I'm continuing along and, you know, my mind sort of makes its way back. to my freshman year in college. And this is an important part in my life,

specifically because it's when I really learned what it meant to work hard. I had no idea. And I speak about this often because I went through high school. I had good grades. I was a decent athlete. But I didn't understand what it meant to truly work. You know, my first month in college

as part of the rowing team there was where I learned that just because you're suffering just because you're hurting doesn't mean you're entitled to anything. Someone else out there is suffering just as much. The difference is they might be getting more out of it. They're not feeling sorry for themselves and that mentality was eye-opening for me.

It's not look at me, I'm a hero for putting myself through this. It's, yeah, it's uncomfortable. She's also uncomfortable. Which one of you guys is going to turn that into results? That's what defines winners. And I remember, you know, the first workouts I did. I remember doing jump squats and wall sits with my teammates

and emphasizing ways to break down the exercise into simple pieces. Mentally, right? Little pieces that the mind was okay with that weren't so scary. A two-minute wall sit is pretty intimidating. A 20-second wall-sit, that's not so bad. So do six of those. Say something funny, between each set. Find a way to tear down, you know, the mental obstacles because the body can

take so much if the mind lowers its defenses and simply allows it. So anyway, I'm making my way forward up the coast, and I stopped thinking about how far I had to go. I just stopped. I did not let it enter my brain. My focus went very specifically to every two steps, counting one, two, one, two, one two, because anyone can do anything for two steps. It's not hard. Again, it just so happens that they stack up and create miles, but miles is not my concern. I'm not physically able to leap a mile. No one can do that.

What I'm capable of doing is taking steps. That's all I can do. And it's manageable, and I can say without a doubt, that that changed my experience. It took the pressure off. If you don't feel like you're in control, you will have a very tough time generating results. Because again, no one can leap a mile.

And so a big part of success is rearranging the deck so that you have that control. You're behind the wheel. Sometimes it's just reminding yourself that the little things create the big things, the pieces stack up, and every single thing in life can be broken down in those little pieces. And guess what?

They're not scary. When you take the cover off, they're not overwhelming. Most importantly, they're completely within your control. On a similar note, a friend of mine recently asked the other day about YouTube. He's got a follower base of entrepreneurs. A lot of them are looking to take their business onto the platform. It was asking me some questions. And he asked, you know, what was the moment that sparked your channel's growth?

And it's a funny question because the 100,000 subscriber mark was something that, you know, right from the get-go, the onset that I was looking forward to. I was aiming for. But there was never that mile leap, right? There was no single video that changed the trajectory of my viewership or channel or business. That's not how it happens. It's a step-by-step process. You can't jump to 100,000 or 500,000 or a million subscribers. And starting out, all I would think about is how far I had to go.

I'd get all worked up and stressed out and, you know, disappointed. But you learn lessons as you go through things. And I realize that you don't get X many subscribers in a day. And if that's your focus, of course you'll be overwhelmed. Because you can't control that. But what you can control. is every thought, every video, every interaction with someone who cares about your message. And if you stay true to that, your consistency manifests itself in the form of a growing subscriber base.

You know, and the point is it doesn't matter what you're doing, right? Talk about running, talk about YouTube, could be sports, it could be relationships, it could be anything. Yes, you want to understand where you're going. know your target, you want to lock in a direction, then let go. Goals derail us because we forget what they're made of. They're made of little vulnerable pieces. To get to the top of a mountain, you have to climb it rock by rock.

And when you're looking up from the base, yes, it's demoralizing. It might even seem impossible, but no one can cover that distance. It's about the steps to the top. And then at some point, so long as you decide not to turn around, so long as you remain committed to overcoming each tiny obstacle, each barrier, you'll be at the top looking down at everything else, everything below you. Why?

Because you didn't see the stack. You saw the pieces that were laid on top of each other one by one. And that makes all the difference. Success is seeing what's beyond the surface. What's past the thing staring you in the face. And if you can manage to do that, you'll see that nothing in life, nothing, is too big or too tough for you.

Normality is a paved road. It's comfortable to walk, but no flowers grow. Vincent Van Gogh. What is normality? Well, according to the dictionary, normal is the usual average or typical state or condition. Common. Normal is also a decision. There's a quote by Robin Sharma, and I've looked to this for years, it states,

if you want what the 5% have, you need to be willing to do what only the 5% are willing to do. What they obtain is not definitely. Definitionally speaking, normal, it's uncommon. And what they do to arrive at that outcome is also uncommon. They play by a different set of rules, and in doing so, end up with an entirely different outcome than most. To put it simply, we arrive at normal when our effort level is normal. You put in normal hours, or give average effort at work?

But most likely your results, career progress, compensation will be normal. You pay moderate attention to your fitness, your health. Well, your level of physical fitness will be normal. You dedicate typical levels of effort to your relationships. Your relationships will be normal. Not terrible, but not remarkable. I'm sure you get the idea here, the pattern. generally over time, what we get starts to reflect what we gave.

And here's where the self-assessment comes in, the awareness. You have to ask yourself in pursuit of something greater whether your actions are aligning with your goals and objectives. There's nothing so futile is telling yourself you're going to achieve miraculous, larger-than-life outcomes, and then putting in average typical normal effort. If normal goes in, normal comes out. And as I was thinking about this recently, you know, as it pertains to my life, I had a little epiphany.

Right. So fitness is a big area of focus for me. I run or do some type of strength training six days a week. As far as I can tell, that level of effort is beyond normal. Right? I go above and beyond in that area of my life. But even though I'm aligned on my mission to be the 5% there, I realized there was a gap. I realized my diet was very normal, completely unextorinary. It's just easy to convince yourself to eat whatever you want after a really long run, right? Why not pizza? After all, it's the normal thing to do. But I had to remind myself that what I wanted in that area of my life, holistically,

not normal. Therefore, the inputs cannot be normal. It was time to start standing up to those things that are very easy to say yes to, to rationalize. And that's the idea here. I pick my 5% categories where I truly want to excel and make sure there's nothing normal about their development. You want top-tier results. You have to be able to give top-tier effort, make the sacrifices, map out the path. You know, I've come to see this differently over the years. It's not an indictment against you as a person for choosing normal, but know that it is indicative of a choice.

The output eventually comes to align with the input. All the actions or lack thereof stack up to resemble something. It's up to you to decide what that is. And so the next question, perhaps somewhat of an obvious one, is when it comes to the things that matter most to you, why stay confined to normal? It's the above and beyond, the peak experiences, the times we overcame, fought and won,

took the risk and came out on top. That's when we are at our best. That's when we get the most from life. So is normal the end of the world? No. It's just that abnormal is the beginning of one. What if there was one mental shift you could make that would completely transform your life? Because I believe there is, and it's completely underutilized.

It's not talked about, not leveraged nearly as much as it should be. It's simple. We have so much more control over our lives than we think we do. Every single one of us, everyone watching this operates with some semblance of a learned helplessness in their lives. Some things that we've accepted as just the way they are. Maybe we're not happy about it. It doesn't invigorate us, excite us, doesn't do anything for us, but it's life. It's the way it goes. So we'll leave it be. And I think if we train ourselves to identify those things and realize we're capable of changing them, you know, life completely transforms. It's just giving yourself permission to do that.

Jim Rohn has a quote where he basically says, and I'm paraphrasing, but, you know, we often can't control our circumstances. Can't control the seasons. Can't control the wind, but we can change or control ourselves. And that's where the value is. Life is an inherently unfair place, right? We often can't control our backgrounds or the things that happen to us, the things that surround us. But the strength and the gift that we have is the ability to change things now. We can make things better now.

everyone can the question is will they right and that's where the whole locus of control thing comes in it's like it's hard man it's hard to look in the mirror and say this is on me this is my fault this is my responsibility but i can tell you with complete certainty that once you do you get something that you never had up to that point which is upside You get to experience life. There's this human tendency to want to avoid pain more than we want to pursue pleasure, more than we want the best of life. We'd rather avoid the worst of life.

And that scarcity mindset keeps you contained. It keeps you in one place. I guess it inhibits your ability to see that life is malleable. You know, I came across a study where basically we're basically, Researchers gave these people in long-term relationships journals and said, hey, for this amount of time, any time there's a conflict or fight or anything, document in your journal whether you apologized or took control of the situation, how did you handle it? And what the study found was the people that believed life could change, the people that believed

their personality, their situation was, you know, adjustable, were also the same people that took responsibility, right? There's a direct link between taking accountability of something for something and believing you can change your life for the better. They go hand in hand, and it makes perfect sense because you can't control the car from shotgun. If you're riding in the passenger seat, you have no control over where that thing's going. You could sit there and look out the window and put your feet up. You don't have to worry about getting there or navigating, you know, making the right turns. Sure. You get that stress, mitigated. But wherever that car is going, you have to be good with it because you're not behind

the wheel. The second you make the move and get behind the wheel, again, now you have the added stress. Now you're the one responsible for making the right turns and getting there and navigating. But wherever your heart wants to go, that thing is going. And to me, that's just, that's the beauty of life. And how easy it is to miss that is astounding. But I think, again, in some capacity, we all walk right by it. You know, I can talk about different periods in my life. I can talk about driving to work an hour every day, joking around with my buddy, hoping the thing would get a flat tire just so we'd be, you know, we could delay two hours, three hours before walking into the office. Why? Well, because that's life. That's what happens.

You're supposed to hate Monday through Friday, right? And then go enjoy yourself for two days. That's what adults do. That's life in the big city. And you would think that it would be obvious. You would think asking yourself the question, wait, is there a better way? Do I want this? Can I change this?

That would have been at the forefront of my mind. But it took me literally to my mid-20s to say, hey, you don't have to accept this. This is not you. What is you and how can you start moving that way? Completely change. my life, the freedom that I feel because I gave myself permission to feel it is mind-boggling to me. And every single one of us can have that. You just have to go through that very uncomfortable period of looking around you and saying,

you know, I'm not happy with this, this, and this. It's on me. And I'm going to make changes. And I think, you know, collectively there's no more important time to be talking about this. I want to scream this message above anything else from, you know, the rooftops because I believe, and I've talked about this before, collectively, we're moving into a world that incentivizes things differently. Right. It doesn't, we don't incentivize personal responsibility. We don't incentivize doing the hard thing. It's like the attention and the currency is now saying, hey, I'm the victim. I was wronged here.

Him and her hold me back. They over there kept me from being what I want to do or being who I want to be. And then you get that coveted attention. You get the likes and the reshares. You get the, oh, you poor thing. That's what we're being taught is worthy of our time. And what people don't realize, right, when they give into that, is that what you're doing is you're taking the rug out from under you and pulling it.

You're making yourself helpless. It might feel really good to say those guys over there are the reason I'm not where I want to be. It might feel incredible in the moment, but it makes you powerless because you cannot fix it. You're perpetually riding shotgun, and you cannot be happy riding shotgun. You cannot be happy because you're not in control. You cannot be happy because you're building a world and a life of learned helplessness. And I understand, you know,

I always want to emphasize this that we are not the same. Every single human being has different abilities, different backgrounds. We're just humans are different. We're not all dealt the same hand, right? But every single one of us has the same right now to do something with.

And that's where I think that sort of tough love message needs to come in. You know, don't fall for that, you know, that brief moment of satisfaction to be able to get pattern on the back pointing at somebody else. You're doing yourself a disservice. Always doing yourself a disservice. To win, you have to look yourself in the mirror, ask the tough questions, identify what you want and start moving towards it because you're capable. You're capable of making that change. One of my favorite stories, and this was a lightbulb moment for me very early on in my entrepreneurial career was someone I was doing business with pointing out my limitations, pointing out that I had, you know, this sort of learned helplessness

when we were doing business transaction, incredibly successful, established guys. And, you know, me being new in the field, it was just like, this is great, this is awesome. I just want to chat, right? I'm excited to work with you. I don't care, you know, what I charge you, right? Let's just be in the same room. And him being like, if that's how you value yourself, Eddie, that's how the world will value you. You're operating here because you've learned that here is right or where you're,

need to be. You're not even thinking about, you know, quadrupling your income, growing your company. You're not even thinking about what's out there because you're playing so small. You've accepted this as life. For whatever reason, whoever I was blaming, whatever I assumed was just the way. And it caused me to look around and go, you're right. No one's ever going to value me more than I've That's just that's how the world works and so where in my life are the places that I'm doing that Where in my life am I unhappy? Where in my life have I settled? Where can I up the ante or change things? There's so much out there you can be so much more fulfilled than you are and That's the idea. It's like if we're not aware of what truly makes us happy

If we're not aware of what we want And we'll always be in a situation and we'll always be in a situation and where we're blaming other people for not having it, where we're looking at the world and seeing it as this stale, limiting place. And it's not. It can be so incredible in this infinite opportunity waiting for you. But that's what it's doing. It's waiting for you.

It's waiting for you to see it as that. It's waiting for you to identify goals and targets and see yourself as the person that can close that. gap. So the one thing you can do right now today in this moment to change your life, realize that you can change your life. Realize that you are in control. Step out of the passenger seat into the driver's seat and take that thing somewhere incredible. George Elliott has said it's never too late to be what you might have been. And this is a message that I 100% stand behind.

I will always believe that to be true. Why? Because you always have the now to start moving in that direction. And a skeptic or someone playing devil's advocate could say, yeah, well, not me, right? The timeline for me has expired. Or I missed the age requirement. Maybe life circumstances have made Plan A impossible. it is quite literally too late.

Okay. But here's what I believe we frequently misunderstand in this department. I think we misidentify what it is we really want. And sure, that sounds presumptuous for me to sit here and imply that maybe you miss the mark. How would I ever know what you want? Well, hear me out.

Because I think too often we confuse the vehicle for the destination. That thing we thought we wanted, in actuality, wasn't really what mattered to us. We wanted where it would bring us. We wanted how it would make us feel. We wanted what we'd become when we engaged in that thing. That thing was simply the ride to the destination, not the destination itself. And that's incredible news.

because vehicles are interchangeable. It's always possible to find a new route or new ride to this show. And this is why self-reflection is so important, because it's easy to get so caught up in the vehicle that we forget where we're going. For example, I get a ton of inquiries about keynote speaking, and that's fantastic. I think it's really cool that people want to do that and see me as someone to help guide them.

But when I hear that question, I can't help it. My first thought is always, okay, but why keynote speaking? And it's not personal. Why should always be the first question we ask? Is that truly the destination? Do you feel in your soul you have a story to tell? Do you get a high from the audience interaction? Is it how you feel you can best serve the community?

Like, what is it for you? Or maybe it was more of an arbitrary decision. where what you're looking for is, you know, generating impact, adding value to others. Maybe it's some type of financial incentive. All these things are valid, and they could all come from speaking. My point here is not to tell you what you should or shouldn't be pursuing as your goal. My point is that we need to understand why. Because when we get to the core of what we really want, the best path to get there

often looks way different than we thought it might. I use this example often, but perfectly relevant. There was a point in time where I used to think songwriting was it for me, right? My heart, my plan. Until I realized pretty quickly that I could live without it, and that surprised me. I wasn't quite sure what to make of that, but that what really made me sad to let go of was the storytelling piece, the expression, observing and philosophizing about life.

And that when I took that emotive storytelling, I could bend it and reshape it a million different ways. That I actually love the freedom of being able to express myself or make a point without being totally bound by rhyme scheme and rhythms. I found that point where I could help others in their difficult times, maybe see things from a new angle by helping them to look at the world differently, right? vehicle in a way was almost expendable. And that was a giant epiphany for me. You know, songwriting was not what I wanted. It was bringing me closer to what I truly wanted. That helps me

reshape my plans, my approach, my strategy. And hey, maybe you're different. Maybe you are right on the money. Maybe you've thought this through and things couldn't be clear. But hey, people tend to speak from their experiences and, you know, that awareness to me was no small accomplishment. Getting there and understanding that, right? If that 1,000-foot view does anything, it exposes how multidimensional the playing field is. And how our proclivity is always to box ourselves in. Smaller, smaller, smaller, often leading us to walk by and miss quite a bit. It's also true that understanding what the destination is, making a point to really comprehend. that doesn't mean you have to scrap what you're doing.

It could simply lead to that light bulb moment. So now you go, oh, you know, there are additional ways I can arrive at that destination. Maybe I've been so focused on a particular element of the journey, so tied to a particular vehicle that I've been limiting myself. Right? It expands your options. In the book Decisive by Chip and Dan Heath, they talk about how one of the biggest problems we have in decision-making is unintentionally narrowing the scope.

That we have numerous additional avenues available to us. But we don't see them because we become so fixated on a few choices. I think of that point often, you know, challenging myself as to why I'm doing what I'm doing, especially when activities are time intensive. You know, there needs to be a happy medium, obviously. If you challenge every single thing you do, you'll be walking around in circles all day. But the ability, the ability that the, the, power to drill down the question, what is it I'm really looking to obtain here?

Is such a tremendous advantage? If you can get a true handle on that and you're willing to expand your mind, open your eyes, think about the big picture, reduce the attachment to that dreaded phrase, the way I've always done it, you get to live in a world of endless options. You see that your path is simply that, one path of many. In the business world, you hear stories about people all the time that were unable to separate the goal from the medium. Couldn't look outside the parameters they'd created for themselves, the blockbusters of the world. You know, when it should have been hold the vision but adjust the process and readjust over and over again.

Our tendency is to hold on to that process so tightly that it becomes a weight around our ankles. When it comes to relationships. People stay in toxic relationships all the time because that's the person. This is the group I hang out with. This is my network. Well, what are you looking to get out of a relationship or group or network? Because no, it certainly shouldn't be betrayal or chronic stress or limiting beliefs being imposed upon you.

So if that's the case, detach and find a different way, a different person, or a different group. Again, you're confusing the vehicle with the destination. Another example, college, right? Which for some people makes perfect sense for others. It doesn't. I loved in Matthew McConaughey's book Green Lights when he realized he wanted to be an actor. And to make his parents proud, to do it was traditionally right. he went to acting school

until he realized his most valuable experience was everything he was doing outside of school that the classroom was one vehicle of many to his ultimate destination was ultimately expendable he had that foresight someone once told me

when I went to get my first car that the buyer is in control because they have the greatest strength a superpower the ability if it does not serve you to walk away to change course. You can always do that. So when you feel stuck or stagnant, try asking yourself,

is this a vehicle problem or a destination problem? What is it that I want more than anything else? And what is it this journey is bringing me that gets me there? That gets me excited in the morning that inspires me to my core. Because I find that when you can detach the goal from the method, it often exposes some valuable information that helps you reestablish momentum. Maybe it's taking resources from one place

and adding it to another. Maybe it's a slightly adjusted approach. Maybe it's cutting a few small things away. Maybe it's a pivot, maybe a total revamp. Who knows? But the idea is it's never too late to get where you most want to go. Because when you identify the destination,

when you realize what the finish line is, There are always numerous roads that lead you there. We just have to make sure we don't get so caught up in a particular path, or exhaust so much energy trying to jam that square peg into the round hole that we miss the infinite number of wide-open doors, waiting for us to notice their existence and walk through. It all starts with a thought. You didn't ask for it.

You never wanted it, but it's here. And now the game has changed. Because that thought is not your friend. It's not telling you how strong you are, or reminding you that you always find a way. No, it's informing you that you're finished, tired, weak, chanting that you'll get them tomorrow, kid. softly at first, than a little louder and a little louder until the message becomes unmistakable.

And in this moment, it's not your legs that become vulnerable. It's not your lungs. This situation transcends the physical. You are in the ring with your mind. This is when the gloves come off. It's fight or flight. And in your gut, you're You know it's nothing more than a front, intimidation. Life's way of separating the average from the exceptional, but this is not about knowing the truth. It's about having the courage to stand up to it. Because that voice is continuously showing you your distress, your pain, your fatigue.

It's pointing to an empty well, telling you that you have nothing left. And perhaps in a different universe you'd listen. But in this world, the well always goes deeper. There is always more to give. That moment when you begin to hurt, the second that voice pops into your head, you have only given a fraction of your maximum effort. When you meet resistance, your limits haven't even been tested. do not make the destination any more or less real,

they simply call for an adjustment. So adjust. See, time stops when you stop. Goals stop when you stop. Dreams stop when you stop. And in a world with infinite possibility, there's simply no reason to relinquish that control. So let your first.

Forward progress, silence the dissenting voices. Let those on the sideline talk about their empty tanks and fantasized limitation. You are not running on empty. My friend, you are simply running. The other day, I went to check out an open mic. And basically people sign up to share their short stories, their poetry, stuff like that. And I'm sitting there, soaking it all in, enjoying each one as they went up on stage. And eventually this girl makes her way up.

The first thing she does is she tells the room, hey, I've never done this before, but I've always wanted to, so here I am. She takes out her phone and begins reading some of her poems. And pretty quickly, two things stuck out to me. One is she was brilliant. It's just so incredibly talented that I'm thinking, man, if she keeps doing this, she's going to find herself in some crazy places,

she's really going to make an impact. That was the first thing. And the second, as I sat there and watched, was that I noticed that her hands were visibly shaking. I was pretty close to this stage. And I could see this happening to the point where she had to place one on top of the other, right, to keep the hand that was holding her phone

from bouncing around while she read. That's how visibly nervous she was. And immediately my mind went down this road, reflecting back on the moment I've had just like that, because, man, I've been there, where you're both determined and terrified at the same time, but somehow the desire to try outweighs the fear just enough for you to find yourself in that exact situation.

just enough that you step into a foreign world, still wondering whether you made the right move, you know, every step of the way from the car, the building, onto this stage until you hit the point where, okay, well, now you can't turn back. Now you're here, you can't leave. And the thing is, and this is what was so beautiful to me, she was never forced to do this at gunpoint.

No one made her step into that chaos. It was self-created. She could have stayed home. She could have closed her journal or the notes app on her phone, and that would have been the end of that. But no, not today. Today, one yes would lead to another. Would lead to another and another.

And despite the nerves, the sweaty palms and shaky hands, she would open a new chapter in the story of her life. Proved to herself that she's bolder than she thought she was just a few hours ago. That there's upside when you confront those unknowns in life. And as I sat and watched, I was so incredibly moved, so proud, so impressed. Partly because I know that to many of the people in that room, it might not have looked like much. You know, it's like, okay. Okay, great, round of applause for the new artist or poet.

Welcome. But I knew the gravity of the moment. I understood how big it truly was, and regardless of what words came out of her mouth or how well they were assembled, that night was not about the performance. No, it was about new beginnings. It was about outstretched wings,

opening one's eyes to the learned helplessness and pinpointing the opportunity that was simply waiting for that first step to occur. And see, that's what I want to emphasize. That's what I believe every single one of us needs to understand, to fully get the biggest moves we make in life. Well, it's easy to convince ourselves that they aren't necessary or worth it.

The things that transform us hide themselves. A lot of the time, they don't feel urgent. They aren't life or death decisions. They can be the stages we never step on. The people we never talk to, the chances we never take. Because, well, what happens if we simply stay right where we are? Say thank you, but no thank you to those fleeting opportunities. Nothing.

Nothing happens. More of the same. And realistically, nothing is far less scary. and all that other stuff. We don't fear nothingness. We don't intrinsically fear more of the same. No, we fear stepping onto the stage. We fear vulnerability.

We fear messing up, looking stupid, being judged. And yeah, when you do nothing, you get to skip all that. Avoid all that discomfort and that potential pain. But you also miss the feeling of victory. of closing your eyes at night knowing how badly you wanted to just let that ship sail, how terrified you were about what could go wrong, but you did it anyway. You get to feel you have earned the rush of stepping into a chaotic world. And even if temporarily you tamed it, that's what life is about.

Always remember that we have a natural proclivity to avoid pain, not to pursue the things that make us feel alive. Deep down in our DNA, there exist instructions, instructions to run away from the things that could hurt us, embarrass us. Our minds will race, our bodies will kick and scream, our hands will shake, that's just the way it goes. And so we prove to ourselves that it's all conquerable, that reality can be reliance, It's a layer of resistance that has to be faced and then dismantled.

Why was I so moved that night? Because I got to watch in real time someone dismantling that fear on their way to something incredible. It's courage. Stepping into the arena. Not for the people next to you or anyone else, but for you. Because you know there's more. You know that where you are, you know that where you are, that where you are pales in comparison to where you can be.

I'm definitely one to look back from time to time and reflect, and I'll tell you what, I'm incredibly thankful for the hard times that shaped me, the challenges that were forced upon me and made me who I am. But beyond that, and perhaps even more so, the times I stepped out on my own accord, terrified, and manufactured change. The times that the fear of staying the same

eclipsed the fear of failure. The times I could have stayed home, woken up the next morning and lost nothing, but instead saw what there was to be gained and threw myself into that metaphorical fire so that confidence could be forged and new chapters could be written. Let's all remember how out of focus,

the present moment looks. Remember how inclined we are to look at life through a lens of scarcity. We are trying to avoid, avoid, avoid, but if you can even briefly find the strength to step back and ask, what is there to be gained? You see that not going is the real danger.

And those stages that seem arbitrary, that seem like optional, stops along the way, while they're just as imperative as the air you breathe. They are not some things. They are everything. We all hit a point where we look back on the roads we traveled and see the culmination of footsteps that have come to constitute our lives. And we want that moment to feel full.

Like no stone was left unturned, like we put it all on the line. So will you step onto this stage of life? Stand your ground as the curtain opens, read your poems to a foreign audience. Will you share your voice even though it trembles? Because if you do, you're giving yourself permission to truly live, to feel. Look, we're not here for a long time. This is a very short ride. So why not give as much of yourself to the world for as long as you possibly can?

Why not step out knowing that the difference between nothing and everything is what you do with shaky hands? There's a saying that just because you spent a long time making a mistake doesn't mean you need to continue making it. There's an incredible advantage in life for those who can separate past and future. Who can recognize sunk costs and walk away, walk away from the past, move on to new things. But here's the challenge, right? Like so many things our instinct is to preserve. It's, yeah, but I've invested so many years. I've spent X amount of dollars and maybe I don't like where I'm at, but look how long it's taken me to get here.

Well, here's the reality, that time is gone. That money is not coming back, no matter what you do or what direction you take from here on out. There's no reason to think you have to maintain the same trajectory or hold on to a specific identity or pattern of behavior yesterday isn't the focal point here, the goal is simpler. What matters now and how will you get there now? You've grown, you've evolved, you've changed, and you're changed. targets have shifted, so why shouldn't you? The idea of sunk cost is so important because it's essentially realizing that you're not indebted

to the resources you've spent or exhausted. There's no need to be a slave to previous decisions that you've made. No, just chalk it up as an integral step in your learning process, an aspect of growth, and move forward to what matters, to what you can. about. And if that seems obvious, I challenge you to think about the decisions you've made over the last year and I guarantee you you've let factors affect your decision making that are irrelevant to your goals. Because we feel this camaraderie with yesterday like there's a debt to be paid, but man, life is too short to run in place. If it's not pushing you forward, drop it. If it's not what you need,

forget it. In other words, Don't be one of those people that wakes up and makes the same mistake every single day because you've spent a long time making it. See, reality only exists in your head and that's why it's beautiful. You can unlock the cell door and walk out. Don't lose sight of the greatest gift you have. The new beginning that lives in every second where you can take a turn you've never taken before, remove the mask and play a role you've never played. Let that sense of

excitement pull you to new things. Let go of what you can't change and pursue what you can. Forget the time spent. Think of now. Where can you invest now? Your surroundings didn't magically arrive. You chose them and you can just as easily take that wheel and leave. Simple formula. What is best for you and how do you get there? Not where you feel obligated to be or expected to be or pressure to be. Where do you need to be? Everything else is noise. Everything else is a rope keeping your ship on shore and you are not confined to that harbor for yesterday's destination. You're built to chase the horizon. Follow your curiosity into the sunset. You don't make decisions based on yesterday's You sculpt it with tomorrow's possibility. We spend a lot of time asking ourselves, what if things don't work out? What if I fall, fail, or miss the mark?

What if I have to head home empty-handed? Diminished pride, defeated. But what if we've simply been asking the wrong question? Imagine flipping the story. flipping the script. What if everything worked out better than you could have ever imagined? What if you learn in going that you have barely scratched the surface of your potential? That you've been accepting too little, leaving too much on the table?

What if you learn that you are powerful beyond all recognition? Not because someone told you so. No, but because the very steps being taken prove the point. What if the things that held you down can be dismantled? The thoughts that held you back can be demolished. Why is it? We don't ask more of those questions. Generally, you get what you look for.

What you ask of life is what you shall receive, or so the saying goes. So my thought here is perhaps we need to ask for more. of the world but of ourselves. There's an ocean of opportunity before us, enough of this pointing out in wishing for more while we wade in water that is waste deep. First steps will always be believing that more exists, that the world might not be able to see it. It might not exist to your left or right, but it exists in your head, and that is enough.

That is where all great accomplishments start. It's the necessary beginning. And to disregard a perceived outcome because it's only in your mind it hasn't materialized yet. It's like disregarding a seed because it's not yet a tree. The two are forever intertwined. They need each other. Simple formula. See greatness and move towards that greatness.

Nothing else is relevant. And sure, you'll have your struggle from time to time. time, no question. But that's not failure. That's what happens along the path to better things. That adversity is simply the price that must be paid for dreaming, for taking the ideal and bringing it to life. And at the end of the day, that price is a bargain. So ask yourself, what if things do work out? In fact, what if they work out better than I ever imagine? What if the current norms can be transformed, reality altered?

What if this is just the beginning of the best life has to offer? You change the questions, you change the outcome. And today feels like the perfect day for change. Eight lessons to live by. For one, remind yourself to see those things we've taught ourselves not to see. The things that don't directly correlate to money or status or ascension up some social hierarchy, underneath those things are what keeps us alive. Keep our souls lit, our eyes open, our days meaningful.

We don't think we need music to invigorate the soul. We don't think we need wind on our face or sand on our feet. We don't think we need to shut the world off so we can hear ourselves thinking. Now we fall into the trap of believing that beautiful is a luxury. It's not. It's why we're here. And it's not about being anti-money or status or whatever your goals are. But it is about realizing.

that those things without beauty and art and nature and calm are empty. There are a plane without wings, lungs without air. The things we have taught ourselves not to see are the things we need above all else. Number two, you are stronger than you think you are. You are made to endure. It's a pave, a path, find away, rise. to the occasion. And we know this when it's easy, but we forget when it's not. When the world feels stacked against us. When you're writing things, no one reads, saying things,

no one hears, making things no one sees. When you know you have somewhere to go but aren't sure where that is, no you need to evolve into something but have no idea what. This is when you need to know that you have everything you need. It's not about finding new pieces. It's about arranging the ones in your hand. Like smoke expands to fill any room, your potential can expand to conquer any obstacle you are stronger than you think you are.

Number three, some things are beyond our control. But being ready for the opportunity when it comes our way is very much in our control. And maybe it takes a day, a month, a year longer. You can't control that. You can't control the path of that firefly, but when it lights up and comes your way, you can have the jar ready and the lid off.

You can be well-read, well-prepared, rehearsed to the point of confidence, reliance on repetition and not hope. No endeavor is a coin flip when you use a double-headed quarter. One of the most valuable questions I've learned to ask is when and where in my life can I create those magic coins. Number four, we are at our best when we are moving towards something. Inaction has an opportunity cost that is more expensive than anyone wants to pay. Places I haven't gone, risks I haven't taken. They're the loss.

The dragon has the gold for a reason, and to avoid the former is to forfeit the latter. If we are not growing, we are dying. So as Emerson suggested, find a star to hitch your wagon to. And even when the world forces detours upon you, inserts roadblocks or temporarily covers that star up altogether. Remember that it's still there. as bright as it ever has, waiting for you to reorient yourself. Remember who you are and carry on. Number five, when it's your fault, you are in control. I used to hide behind the

notion that bad grades were because of a bad teacher. That missing the promotion was because of the boss. That an inability to influence was because the world didn't understand. And To whatever degree these things may be true, we win when we dial them back to zero. If your bad grades are completely your fault, you'll better prepare. If your lack of promotion falls entirely on your shoulders, you'll find ways to add more value. If your inability to influence is because you're missing the mark, you'll stop projecting yourself onto the world and start asking the world.

how you can serve. Before it can become an opportunity, it has to first become your responsibility. To grow, we have to plant roots where it hurts, where the eagle lives, where we have to first be humbled, then we can accelerate vertically. Number six, if it means something to you, there is value. It's not stupid. Because they don't get it doesn't mean that they shouldn't. Just because it's not happening today doesn't mean it won't be tomorrow. Life is a lot like six-year-olds playing soccer. Everyone chases the ball because that's what we're told. That's where the attention is.

That's what's flashy. But as an outside midfielder most of my life, I know that some of the most potent attack sequences manifest on the outside of the field and then are re-centered. To run up the sideline without the ball is to see what happens before it happens. The magic is created in the empty space before it translates to the high traffic, high reward areas. And just because you're metaphorically running without the ball doesn't mean you're not in prime position to have monumental impact. You're not reacting. You are creating. Don't forget that.

Number seven, nothing is mandatory. Everything we do, we choose, where we are, who we're with, how we spend our time. And it's easy to look around and think we are programmed to exist between specific parameters. We're not. And often we don't see until life forces a change upon us how much flexibility we have in life. Now, sure, change obviously brings with it its challenges. New questions, uncertainties. new places to map and people to meet, but as Mark Manson says, there is no problem-free life.

No, the beauty of life is that we get to choose which problems we will spend our time solving. Problems to solve are what make life meaningful. So if you're looking around and not seeing what you want to see, you're not stuck. You're simply solving the wrong problems. Perhaps it's time to find some new ones. In number eight, tomorrow is not your answer. It's your problem. Tomorrow is your excuse to wait.

To hold off to rationalize stagnation. Tomorrow is the status quo. It's a fresh new coat of paint on a car that won't run. We're a new roof on a house with a cracked foundation. Tomorrow can only tell the story that has acted out, That means without stepping into the limelight right now, in the immediate, in the present, there will be no story. If stories aren't made tomorrow, they're made now.

So let's stop expecting the messenger to be the author, and let's take fate into our own hands, write our own headlines during the only moment we'll ever have, the present one. So let the rest of the world dance around tomorrow. That's not where your mind should be. You should be working on the melody of today. Everyone wants to change the world, but no one wants to change himself. This was written by Leo Tolstoy in reference to people's proclivity to point out at the world and project blame rather than to point in at themselves and ask, why?

What can I do? How can I be better? Which when you think about it is basically a shark forfeiting its bite, right? Or a bird giving up its wings. Our personal agency is without a doubt our superpower. Yet from my vantage point, sometimes feels like we're walking away from that superpower, a tiny step at a time. Little by little, day by day, we're allowing greatness to fade.

while bringing about the death of the hero. And well, that's a pretty big claim. What could I possibly mean by this? It's funny, when people ask me what I'm most proud of, my mind pretty quickly goes to my work, the brand that I've dedicated the last almost decade to building. But I don't think that's right. I think it's a product of my answer,

but it's not my answer. What I'm most proud of is chipping away at the monster that is the victim mentality. You know, my default when things went wrong for so long was to feel bad for myself. It was easier to be the victim and sulk than it was to keep taking the hits. It's like a cheat code. When you can just bask in your sorrow and hate the world, you don't have to do anything. It's like a giant ibuprofen. and for the discomfort that is life.

But it relieves this symptom, not the cause, and to understand to overcome this worldview is like being gifted with a new pair of eyes. And what I learned was that self-pity, it gets you nothing. It leaves you resentful, disappointed, envious, wandering down a path that is not your own. What I learned was that my story needs. needed a hero.

That's why as I grew I spoke about the power and the beauty of doing the difficult thing. Running in the rain, chasing the metaphorical fireflies, taking the last train home, see, until you immerse yourself into that vast unknown, you stay in a cell of your own making. You build walls of limitation and you exist entirely within them. as time has progressed. I look back, there are two things worth mentioning. One is that we find life's meaning in the difficult thing. And two, there is a fundamental misunderstanding,

and even from time to time contempt for what the difficult thing means, for those who speak of the difficult thing, as though hard truths are in some way inconsiderate, Like diverging from the comfort of one's feelings implies a lack of empathy. But that's wrong. If you love someone, if you care about someone, if you care about yourself, you say what is true. And what is true is that the shelter and the temporary comfort of victimhood is a high not worth the withdrawal, not worth the suffering.

It got me nowhere, it will get you nowhere, and that is a reality that will never cease to be true. We live in a world that's been shaped entirely by those who found the courage to do the difficult thing. Everything around us is a product of the courageous decision to take the now and bend it. And that means taking hits, it means being criticized. It means by definition you are choosing to be uncommon. common. You're choosing to change things yourself and by default the world around you. There's nothing wrong with being common. Quitting is relatable. Failure is relatable. Falling short is relatable. We're all human and we've all been there. But these stock features of humanity they are not worth

celebrating. We don't put on pedestals the familiar. No, we put on pedestals the times that we've reshaped the familiar and a world of participation trophies is a world that has disincentivized that which makes life worth living. It cripples the very pursuit that ignites the soul, a push towards the extraordinary. It's time we resurrect the hero. See through the facade of short-term comfort that leads to long-term emptiness. In a world where attention is currency. It's time we acknowledge the payment we receive when we play victim buys only despair. Sure we're flawed. That will always be true, but we are capable of manufacturing greatness. We're capable of capturing hearts and captivating minds. If you could only see within yourself

that story unwritten, if you could feel the greatness that awaits, the roads to be traveled and mountains, to be climbed, there would be no debate. There'd be no hesitation about that march to the belly of the beast. If only to show that our demons exist solely where we allow them to. Resurrection the hero. Fight those battles that light you up. Blaze your trail through the valley of darkness. Take that path unknown to the common man,

unseen to those who live within the confines of what is. Resurrection that hero because you need you, because the world needs you. There's no time to be down or sad or dwell on the mistakes of yesterday. There's too much on the line to pretend that settling was the plan all along, or to point at the obstacles with disdain and hatred while life rotates around you, No, resurrect the hero. Resurrection your answer, resurrect the person you were meant to be. It may not be simple or intuitive.

It may cause you to give more than you knew you had. It may not be easy. But my friend, Easy never changed the world. Every once in a while, for a brief moment in time, we need to pause. We need to take a breath and ask ourselves who we are. Of course, not in the literal sense, not the reflection staring back in the mirror, but in the context of the road you've already traveled, how far you've come. Because it's easy to become consumed with what's ahead.

Especially when you can start to feel that finish line. You can see the top of the mountain. When you know everything is about to be on the line, your greatest test await. But here's one of the greatest secrets I've ever been told. That test is not about right now. It's not even about the future. It's about the foundation.

you've already been building and trusting yourself to be you. It's all those times you could have said no, but you didn't. How you like so many others could have taken that easy road, but you opted for something greater. No, my friend, this obstacle before you is not where you prove or make or create yourself. It's where you simply verify who you already. are cash in on a prize that's been years in the making. It's where you validate the price you've been paying for as long as you can remember. And what you need to take with you, what you need

to understand right now more than any other time is that you aren't here to simply survive or navigate foreign territory. No, you were made for this moment. You were made for this moment. moment. There's a saying that pain is temporary, but quitting is forever. And that simple quote has got me through some of life's greatest trials and tribulations, most challenging times. Because to put it simply, when we're overwhelmed or we're amidst life's chaos, our minds don't scream out, oh hey, you've gotten through this before, and you'll get through it again. They don't remind us of our strengths or reassure us of our dedication. No, when we feel like we are neck deep in chaos, all we see is what we're not. That's why people quit. They become consumed

with the dark, forgetting that the answer is a light switch away, overlooking the fact that they already have everything they need. So let this be your reminder. That getting across the finish doesn't require some miracle, doesn't require you to do what no one in humanity has ever done before. No, all it asks is that you believe in yourself to hang on when others would let go, to continue forward when you most want to turn back, because it's always darkest before the dawn, most challenging at the peak. When the roar of the crowd becomes audible and the trophy visible, find it within yourself to rise amidst the pressure,

not to shrink, but to expand, to be the most powerful person in your life, you. Because right now, in this moment, you have arrived. years from now, when you look back, make sure you remember one thing about this moment. That you gave everything you had. That you leaned in on those late nights and those early morning wake-ups. The hours upon hours in the books, the preparation, dedication, and the resilience, that you

knew who you were and let it manifest and lead you into the future. We all find ourselves at this fork in the road, the one where we have a decision to make. Will I survive or will I thrive? Will I exist or will I truly live and in the race of life? It's when our hearts hounds in our chest. The blood flows through our veins, our lungs cry out for air, our minds beg us to stop, down relax it's in that moment that we must carry on we must be our best we must put all those little pieces together to create our masterpiece to breathe

life into the foundation that you have been standing on this whole time see this moment is yours if you're willing to endure to hang in just a little little bit longer, give just a little bit more if you're willing to put all of yourself into the task before you. You may just be amazed at what life gives back. I was recently on a flight to Boston and the plane lands were taxing to the gate and eventually we get there. Plain stops, the fastened seatbelt light goes off and as soon as this happens and I'm just sure, you know, everyone's seen this, a large number of people in the plane jump up and they go to stand in the aisle, where at that point they proceed to stand there for about 15 minutes

depending on where they are in the plane. And I've always gotten a kick out of this, right? Everyone has their thing, this is my thing. I think it's hilarious. You watch people just standing there. They're kind of annoyed. They're cramped. You know, they're reaching over each other to grab their carry-ons and, you know, find a way to stick them between their feet. It's amusing, right? Certainly not a life or death situation. There's nothing serious about it, but it is a lost 15 minutes of reading or listening to music or whatever the

case may be. The moral of the story is that it's a prompt decision made without much thought and not much value is provided in return. And I turned to my brother who was traveling with me and made a joke. We started talking about kind of the irrationality of human beings.

Why do he do things like this? Our lives are filled with things like this. And we sort of carry on like mindless drones. And then it hit me, right? I'm certainly not immune to this type of thing, and I don't think anyone is. Maybe I don't stand up in the plane for 20 minutes,

but there are certainly parallel situations. Which prompts this question. Imagine if they can be recognized and weeded out. Like, what are the airplane aisle moments in my life? When am I actually? just to act without thinking about it or doing things that, you know, they're not helping me, but they're around, maybe because there's this, you know, manufactured urgency I grew up with or I'm seeing everyone else do it. Like how many things that I do every day aren't getting me

closer to where I want to be? Impulse versus what's best. And they can be small. Like, my impulse is to check my phone first thing in the morning. But that's probably not what's best for me. Actually, I know it's not. But I could easily see a situation where I never, think about that or recognize that and just continue doing it. The world doesn't end, but I'm missing an opportunity to be a little better. My impulse is to think and worry about things I can't control. That's my impulse, but that's not what's best for me. And sure, I can see a world where I don't take time to think about that or recognize that

and just mindlessly keep doing it my whole life. But I'm missing an opportunity. These things can also be big, right? things that we all do, they're commonplace, they're hidden in plain sight, limiting yourself because of what others might think of you. We hear that so much, it almost feels like a cliche, but we do it, right? If you've ever retracted or not done what feels right in the moment because of that inherent fear, that nervous feeling in your stomach, because you're worrying about standing out or being different, that is your airplane aisle decision. If you've ever

made a life choice so that you can feel adequate or feel like you're keeping up with the Joneses next door, that is an airplane aisle decision. If you've ever wanted to or done something to bring others down, right, so that you can stifle the competition so that your insufficiencies feel smaller, that is an airplane aisle decision. If you've ever spoken or reacted from a standpoint of emotion, rather than taking a second to collect yourself to stop and to think about, about what's best for you, that is an airplane aisle decision. And these things matter. Because if you truly thought about it,

you'd know that when you're old and you're looking back on your life, the great tragedy won't be these little things, won't be these shortcuts, or who said what or when. No, they'll be having neglected to live authentically. Neglecting to do what's meaningful so that, what, you could appease people that don't care about you. It matters because your happiness doesn't come from the Joneses. And that impulse to fit in, it derails the special gifts you bring to the world.

It's cutting out your own feet from under you. It matters because there's always room at the top for anyone who works. And building people up will always come around to be more beneficial than the alternative than trying to cut people down. when you go out of your way to do that, you don't make yourself better, which is exactly what you need to do. Make yourself better. That's what gets you a result.

It matters because emotional responses usually aren't the right response. And if you don't take time to think in the heat of the moment, you act irrationally and you give up a tactical advantage over everyone and everything that happens around you. And my point is absolutely not to call anyone stupid or make anyone feel inadequate.

As I stated, we all have our thing. We all act on impulse. Without thinking about it from time to time, there is a point in your life where you do that, whether you like to admit it or not. My point is simply that, why don't we take time to think about it? They say simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

And imagine, just imagine if our lives could be streamlined to do the things that matter to us, that make us happy, that are productive, and that's it. Our lives would look a lot different. So question, question your life, question the decisions you make, question the things you do, especially if they're done every day. Almost like a business analyst walking into an organization and studying it, calling out the inefficiencies. In my prior life, I dabbled in that world.

And something I learned was that the beauty, the value of a consultant or business analyst is that they come in with fresh eyes, fresh perspective, and then smooth in the process. They get more out of the pieces that are already there. So be that in your own life. Examine. Even if it's one or two things, even if it's small. Standing in an airplane aisle, this example is silly. It's small, it's not important, but who knows removing it could reveal untapped value. It's funny, small things always seem to become big things at some point in time.

And that example I gave, not looking at my phone in the morning. That can be big, right? The morning's quiet time. I'm not rushed into problems or focusing on things that other people put in front of me. No, I can focus on what feels right to me. It allows me to collect my thoughts, which allows me to decide how the day will go, which prompts me to conquer the things that matter,

which prompts me to feel good about myself and my work, which prompts me to identify as someone who wins every day, and so goes the pattern. It's just about not being blind to your actions. That's all it is. So when you're commuting or you're in between classes or you're at lunch, whenever it is, just take a second. Think about what you do and see if you can identify any of those moments. Work on them.

Success is becoming who you want to be. It's defining yourself, not letting the outside world, not letting your senseless actions or lack of clarity define life for you. On the surface, it was only one. Essentially, worthless. One strand of DNA, one word in a sentence, one ant in a colony, a trivial existence. One would look on and wonder, where is the value here? But like many things in life, the answer is complex. Because sure, one strand of DNA, it doesn't do anything.

But many together will they bring about life? In one word can't tell a story, but many words create language, and, poetry and one ant is defenseless but a colony can swarm an enemy create complex structures and living bridges see some things are more than the sum of their parts and as numbers grow capabilities expand emergent properties manifest properties that didn't previously exist they couldn't be seen when the individual pieces were examined in your differentiator is the ability to look around you and understand that the extraordinary is always broken down into these little ordinary pieces. The same little ordinary pieces that are built back up

to become the extraordinary. One attempt, one trip, one try, one shot. Sure, they don't mean much, but they are not powerless. Because each repetition is like collecting a strand of DNA, creating a new element of life and it's not luck in the air or ghosts in the machine it's using the simple to create the complex and from the complex becomes your answer for many nothings comes your something so don't fixate on what the singularities fail to provide it's not about your one shot look at what is created when those singularities those actions are multiplied when attempt after attempt pile up New characteristics are born.

A world is created. It is like the state of consciousness that exists in your mind. You can't point to it, you can't locate it, but it is a power and a brilliance that exists because of many pieces at work. So don't be fooled into thinking your final destination doesn't exist because you can't see it. It's not reliance on shot one or attention.

shot one or attempt to or take 50, it's the product of everything. Many hours, extraordinary effort, collecting little pieces that allow the complex art to materialize. From the gray matter comes the consciousness, from the abyss comes the universe. Your answers are emergent. So put your head down and collect them. When you are tired, collect, when you are unsure, intimidated, scared, scared. Collect when you feel like the mountain has become too big to climb. Collect when you fail.

Collect when you win. Collect until those emergent properties you need are resting in the palm of your hand. Collect. Or day, it will come. Be that the answers to our most challenging questions are so small that they're brushed off as insignificant. That in pursuing that bulldozer we think is necessary. we think is necessary to knock the door down, we refuse again and again the key that would simply open it.

Why is our first instinct to think our next action needs to be as big or as glamorous as that intended result? Again and again my default has been to look for some brilliant monumental insight or some secret answer that would unroll like a scroll containing a treasure map, but again and again I learn and I relearn that what I need, what is required is so reasonable.

It's so accessible that it almost feels like the universe has a sense of humor, right? It's sitting back and chuckling while we run around with keys in our pockets looking for a sledgehammer to break the door down. This is kind of a funny story. So last year I had my first year old with then live event. And Evan Carmichael was one of the speakers and after the event we were talking

about YouTube, right? He says, why don't you swing by? We'll look at your channel. We'll see if I can offer any suggestions or pointers. And, you know, I gladly accepted the offer. And so I showed up later in the evening. He's got his laptop open. He's running all these tests, right? There's graphs and there's charts and comparison tables. And my first question is, obviously, what are you doing? And he says, I'm testing my YouTube titles and thumbnails, and I'm thinking, interesting. Here's the guy who makes so much content. He's got 378 million views, right?

Why are you exhausting time and energy on this? So I asked him, Evan, does it really matter? I mean, if your thumbnail pictures orange or yellow, or if there's a face on the left or right side, or if it's capitalized or not, right? If it's good, people will show up and they'll watch it. Isn't that what matters? Well, it turns out I was wrong.

In fact, I couldn't be more wrong. And when you're talking about a channel with millions of impressions, making a small change in color could mean your videos are clicked 1% more, which means thousands, if not millions, more views. Which means it's shared more, seen more, which means the channel grows. And that's not from him going back and recreating and reinventing the wheel. No, it's using the key he has in his pocket. right now. You know, and that's the reason I found this so incredible, because until that moment,

I'd always approached the platform with a sledgehammer, right, using our metaphor. I had this idea that, you know, I truly found to be an epiphany and changed the way I think about things, so I'd get really excited, I'd make a video about it, I'd release it out to the world, and maybe it wouldn't do so well, you know, people wouldn't watch that particular video, it would just kind of sit there and my thought was always, all right, hey, they worked for me, it worked for me, must not a hit for everyone else, that's life. On to the next one. Never did I think for a second that, hey, you don't need to recreate the wheel. You're looking for a bulldozer when you need a key. Right? You need to slightly adjust the titling or make

the thumbnail more appealing, right? And the idea is these little tweaks are sometimes all that's required. You know, we think we got to reach out and find some answer or readjust every aspect of what we're doing. And it's like, no, it's a little thing. and it's right in front of you, and it's very manageable, and it's very realistic. And believe me, especially for people that aren't content creators, and there's a lot of you listening to this right now. I get how trivial it seems. But isn't that the point?

And sure enough, within the next few months, I changed some thumbnail pictures around, and two videos that were just sitting there. I got hundreds of thousands of more views, and as I tend to do, look at the bigger picture. Well, how many times in life are you trying to find this monumental answer, And it's like, no, tweak here, adjustment here, change the way you are measuring success. And it changes your tactics.

Think about productivity, right? I've been in the same boat. I want to be more productive. So how? Well, maybe if I get better at scheduling, I'll get scheduling tools, maybe some time management apps. I know I'll do a daily checklist. That'll do it.

That's what I need. But in reality, the commonality when I have productive days is they all consist of me waking up not stressed, having time to think, reflect, plan, and moving on, and it flows into every other aspect in my day. It doesn't require me to buy some $1,000 productivity course. Big result often requires small, manageable action. And again, the point here is that change can feel overwhelming because I think the default mechanism is to assume the next step needs to be as big as that desired result. It's like, oh, I want to climb that mountain, so I have to figure out a way to jump that high. No, that's not true. You have to take small steps many times. And where we should be

looking for consistency or something within our grasp or looking for some small self-contained miracle. You know, everything feels bigger than it is. It's an interesting part about growing up. You realize everything's not as big and intimidating and shiny and sparkly as it appears to be. Now, we have the tools right now in real time. In fact, they're very ordinary, very unimpressive, and that's with goals just like people. You know, I grew up seeing pictures of my grandfather, who was an Admiral in the Navy, talking to American presidents and heads of state, and I'd ask them, you know, how was that?

What was that like? And he'd always say, look, they'd put their pants on one leg at a time just like I do, just like you do. Right? I think in a lot of ways, you know, we need to take the glamour and the mystique away from the things we want and the people we aspire to be like, right? Big goals are an accumulation of little steps. and quote unquote successful people

or ordinary human beings who had the courage to take those steps not for attention or likes or follows but because they cared and they respected the process enough to stick it out and so can I and so can you right you have everything

you need whether you're talking about creating on YouTube or putting yourself in position to conquer the day learning or emulating those you admire Nothing is otherworldly for you. Sure, you'll have your strengths and your weaknesses

because we all do, but there's no magic you need to find or acquire. No bulldozer or a sledgehammer needed to lessen the gap between real and ideal. Just the understanding that the key in your pocket, the one you already have, will get you through the door. It's not a commitment to perfection, it's a commitment to remind yourself yourself that every time you're stuck or overwhelmed or lost, that perhaps you're looking for miracles in the clouds when the solution is simple at your feet. It's not the mountain, it's one rock, it's not the forest, it's one tree, it's not the journey,

it's one step. And as time goes by, you'll find yourself moving beyond that previous reality, beyond those looking for the home run or otherworldly answers, and beyond the narrative that you don't have what it's takes because you do and you always did. You simply had to commit to walking that. Life is delicate, defined as easily broken or damaged, fragile. There's nothing around you that's forever. There's no permanence in our world and sometimes it's a difficult thing to grasp.

Certainly, it's why we long for patterns of consistency where we can find them. We do everything we can to manufacture some semblance of predictability for as long as we can. Doing our best to repress the idea that everything we know is as temporary as a setting son. I had a family member rushed to the ER a few days ago. And thank God she's completely fine. she's back home, she's doing her thing. But I can't stop thinking about the call, how it shook me to my core, how my walls of certainty and predictability were breached.

It was this unsettling reminder that life as we know it isn't guaranteed, that things we love, they're not untouchable. I had to look my helplessness in the face for the first time in a while and realize, well, just how little of the world is mine to control. Which brings me back to a conversation I had when I was younger. I talk about my grandfather often in my work, primarily because of a few impactful conversations that we had. And it's interesting to me how relevant they continued to be.

I remember a handful of times we talked from childhood, and it's like I piece them together retroactively. Things make sense as I get older and kind of figure out what it all means. One of my last conversations with him, we went to this little diner called Leos along the Cape Cod Canal. And he said to me, there are things now that seem impossible. But as you grow and you get older, they make sense, right? Even the most challenging things become manageable. And I get mad at myself for not understanding the context at the time,

or putting two and two together. But basically, he was diagnosed. Basically, he was diagnosed with the brain tumor, and he knew what that meant. Right? And was basically giving me a heads up, like, kiddo, this is going to be tough. But hang in there. That was one of the first times I've dealt with loss of that magnitude. And when you're young, so many things seem stable.

They seem certain. You don't yet get the fluidity of life. That stream is moving. And no matter what, it's going to continue to move. Sometimes that means it takes you places and presents realities that overtake the map that you created for the world, what you understood, what you hoped for, that little understanding of what life means. And I guess I wanted to pick up the baton from that conversation and pass it on to you with maybe a more comprehensive viewpoint. Because I think contained in those words is a message so powerful, so important,

that we really can't afford to miss it. It's like, yes, life is unpredictable. And yes, life can hurt and humble us and knock down what we thought was certain it can challenge what we believed and shake our foundations. It can make us feel small in a universe that stretches beyond comprehension. But at the very center of all of that, that. We are equipped with something that can't be broken. The only thing that can't be ripped

away. The sun around which everything else revolves your ability to endure. Your strength to carry on, to take one step forward. Whether it feels like you're entrenched in the depths of hell or swinging from the stars in the sky. Your resilience, your ability to not only handle life around you, but rise from the ashes of its turbulence and its misfortune, that will never leave you if you don't let it. Victor Frankel has said, everything can be taken from a man, but one thing, the last of the human freedoms. to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.

See, life might be more than weak in control or comprehend. But amidst the might and power of its ocean, our determination is unsinkable. And believe me, there are times when you hear this and think, well, okay, that doesn't affect me. I'm good. I'm doing my thing, right? Just like I did sitting at that table over eggs and bacon that morning,

and man, I hope that's the case, and I hope it stays that way. But life has a way of keeping us on our toes. It never lets us stray too far from the realization that to be human is in some way or another to suffer. It's inescapable, and that's not to scare you. It's to remind you that, one, storms will come, and two regardless of how heavy the rain falls or how loud the thunder roars it will pass and you are strong enough to hang on until it does

that as you grow and as you evolve you become more and more capable of seeing the inevitable not as the world's personal vendetta against you but is your time to dig deep and find within yourself the strength and the courage that was there all along. And that's what that morning was. A message that, look, what's coming will hurt, but you can handle it. And not only that, every time life brings you to your knees, you get back up stronger. That doesn't mean it's easy.

But the point is not that it's supposed to be easy. It's that you're capable of handling a word world that is not easy. You're capable of navigating a reality that is not simple, a sea that is not smooth sailing. You're equipped to handle the complex. And sometimes that little reminder is the greatest gift one can receive. There's so much I can't control, but my God, there's so much I can. The reality you have mapped out, the day to day, the things you've come to know and rely on. As much as we wish they weren't, they are delicate. Withering away with times susceptible to the intricacies, the trials and tribulations of life. But your heart, your soul, your world

within, that is untouchable. It's the divine, the sacred, it's strength limitless, it's breath endless. So remember, even in the darkest of times, you are the very light you long for. And as long as believe that there will always there's an African proverb states every morning a gazelle wakes up and knows it must outrun the fastest lion or it will be killed every morning in Africa a lion wakes up and knows it must run faster than the slowest gazelle or it will starve it doesn't matter whether or a lion or a gazelle, when the sun comes up, you'd better be running.

Because stagnation is losing. Because wishing is a sealed fate. Because immobility is regret. As David Goggin says, you are either getting better or you are getting worse. And in a world comprised of no finish lines, That really simplifies the picture, doesn't it? Because this has nothing to do with yesterday.

Or the self-defeating stories you used to tell yourself. It's about what reality can become. And the best news you'll ever hear is that the steps that brought you to right now, they are not the same steps that will carry you forward. Every single sunrise is a chance to chase down that which sets your soul on fire. Lion or gazelle, day or night, it is never too late to become what you have never been, to rewrite your story. Not for the doubters or the naysayers, but for you.

See, they'll never get it. They'll never understand that your progress is your happiness, why you'd endure the depths of hell twice to be five seconds faster, a little better to build a little higher. It's not nuance. It is survival, woven into your DNA, and just as much a part of you as the heart in your chest. See, today is a currency.

the most valuable entity you possess. Clay where dreams are molded. Light that turns unknowns into outcomes, impossibles into stepping stones. It's why each step is so precious. Because each one is a bridge to a part of you yet to be explored. See, Nietzsche said it best. One must still have chaos in oneself

to give birth to a dancing star. It is why we build these metaphorical arenas. Because without them, there are no dragons to slay. There are no mountains to climb or armies to conquer. It is from chaos that order is born. Every crack of the sword brings understanding. When the sun comes up, there is no wishing for a better world. There is creating in yourself the one who will make it better.

The one who will leave himself and others who will find amidst the horizon the existence of a world within. I wonder how much of you has materialized. Like if what F. Scott Fitzgerald says is true and our lives are defined by opportunity, even the ones we miss, then how much remains in the ether? And I don't think it's about playing a game of what if. You know, that would be endless. It would be self-defeating.

No one's perfect. I don't even really think it's about making a right turn instead of a left. Because as long as you're moving and moving with conviction, life ultimately brings you where you need to be. But more, my concern is the steps never brought. to be. My ideas on the hatch, my opportunities I either knowingly or unknowingly left on the shelf.

Because it didn't seem real enough. Like a Broadway play between my ears that as a spectator I knew would end. After all, that's what stories do. How much of ourselves have we cast aside as simply the things we don't say out loud? At first, it's infinite. to be taught to limit because limits aren't things, their ideas, and ideas must be adopted. That's why they say some of life's best things were done by people too ignorant, to know they were impossible, too naive of the notion that they couldn't say them out loud. Then it's comparison, they have what I want, but it was meant for them and not me. How delusional to think I could have it.

How crazy to think that life has yet to be written. And I am an author. My date is with normalcy in the box where I keep those things we don't say out loud. Then we look around and we see highlight reels. We see awards and vacations and smiles, but we don't stop to think, maybe they're just like me. Maybe they're people who struggle and question themselves

and doubt the road ahead. No, it must be the past diverged. They took happiness and I took those things we don't say out loud. And then there's everyday life when things don't go as planned. When the world presents curveballs and you haven't learned to hit off speed so you feel small and you feel inadequate and ill-equipped. And you could reach out, but that's not cool.

That's not right. That's something that you don't say out loud, but we keep it in, like all in. And eventually if he comes the if only's and I wish I had, it's the quiet envy gazing longingly towards those who just cared less, who realized maybe life's not as serious as we make it out to be, who turn thoughts to things, not by burying, but by embodying them. And maybe that's the trick to unlock the gate, keeping your perceived reality from the possibility of a new one. could create if only you promoted your fleeting thoughts to forward progress.

See dreams can fail to come to fruition in two places in your head and outside of it. But at least outside it has a chance. At least outside you can take the common, normal, everyday background and make it the back drop to your movie where you play a lead role. But it must be accepted and acknowledged, not thought of or even whispered, but screamed so that the details and the trivialities that exist now work for you. That's right, they are now yours. Not because you thought about it,

but because you reached out a hand and you took. You asked the world for something. And in life, it will always be true that you don't get what you do not ask for. So when you find yourself staring up a wall comprised of self-defeating narratives and manufactured limits, be ignorant, be irrelevant, Be irrational, be the reason your dreams have a chance.

And when you look around and you see more and wonder why you don't have it, know that you can, you're allowed to, if you sacrifice you will, but you must believe you are worthy of it. Not in the back of your head where you keep your locker combo and movie quotes, but in reality where words bounce off lips. And when you feel like life is treating you unfairly, like they're happier or have it better, better know that life is peaks and valleys not just for you but for everyone in how you internalize

that and carry on makes the difference and when you feel lost or stuck you are not hopeless but in progress being broken down so that you can be reconstructed stronger better victory is not in hiding those struggles but accepting them as the difference as the reason you created the Miraculous, not because you had dreams, because you said them out loud. What can you be the best in the world at? Life is a complex place. Complexity sometimes means confusion. It means we forget the big picture.

What's our purpose? What are we chasing? What are we bringing to the world? What can you be the best in the world at? It's a little quote. I try and ask myself every day because I know if I stay close to it, my decision will have far greater impact. There will be more meaning in life.

See, it pushes away the things that are appealing in the short term but really don't take us anywhere in the long term. Because one of the coolest aspects of human nature is our ability to illuminate what matters and will mitigate what doesn't. Helps us focus on what's important. We need to go to the grocery store while we stay. Step out the front door, paying attention to nothing but the task at hand, not the objects to our left or right.

We don't know what colors the cars are where that passes by or the plants we walked by. We don't think about the blood pumping through our bodies, making it all possible as we walk to the car. We don't even see the car as its metallic components, as it really is. We see it as our portal to a place that has the food. See, we are blind. But at the same time, have this beautiful gift of vision. We see the path right.

to what's most important. So let's leverage that. And what I think we need to remember is to identify in our own lives what that means with regard to our purpose and the context of what we are becoming. See every day I hear people talk about followers on social media, right? How do I get attention? How do we get noticed? How do I market myself from my brand to the world? How do I stand out? And every time I hear that I always have this little internal reaction like a voice saying that's just so wrong and so backwards. You stand out by adding value to the world, by being good at what you do.

It's that simple. And so look at it like this. We'll take a specific example. To worry about the marketing and the attention and the followers first. It's like worrying about the transportation of something you don't have yet, or that's incomplete.

It's like spending all your time worrying about the logistics of a cargo van and having no idea what that van is going to transport. Isn't the product, most important thing. And that's the question I ask myself when I'm caught up in something flashy or maybe out of line with my big picture. To make sure I'm on track in this crazy world, if social media disappeared tomorrow, are you good enough at what you do that you could take that product or service or skill set to another platform and start again? And if you're not, fine. But are you

working towards it? Those are the parameters that we should all live between. Everything else tends to work itself out. Steve Martin's quoted as saying, Be so good they can't ignore you. And that's what I find so exciting. The opportunity, the chance to build something sustainable. That's why this is a long-term play. And in a world where so much emphasis is put on perception,

what's the reality? What's the story? The pictures are great on the surface, but what's the value that resides below that underneath? What are you working tirelessly? a night to be exceptional at? What are you reading to build yourself up as a force to be reckoned with? As a powerful, valuable individual. See, my world, a lot of what I do is immersed in social media, which is why it's so important that I remember the perspective that I step out. Social media is

not the product. I'm thinking much bigger than that, and I hope you are too, whether it's academics or sports or art. What is your thing? What's going to be your arena? Where are you unstoppable, where you add so much value that the world has to stop. We're sure, you can capture it on social media, but you can talk about it face to face with clients and family and friends and strangers on the sidewalk. You can write about it, teach about it, where it's so much a part of you that the phrase competent doesn't even do it justice. That's where greatness lives.

Not in screaming for attention or creating a facade, those things don't stand the I'm talking about being truly remarkable. And we all have that ability. We're all capable of mastery in some area, moving towards something that matters. We just have to make the choice to own it, to see the world and all its opportunity for what it is, to begin.

And what better a time than now. I once heard a metaphor that our existence that our existence is like standing behind a curtain with tears or holes, and reality becomes which holes we decide to look through when we're peering out at the world on the other side. What do we want to see? And this message, well, it's for whoever out there, feels like giving up or folding their hand.

Whoever's been waiting for things to change, but only sees the clock moving forward, this is a reminder that the very thing you need is on the other side of that curtain. And you don't need to change who you are. You just need to position yourself to see it. Because it's there and you're ready. When life hurts,

we might have every reason to be in pain, to feel lost or confused, but I always find it to be a beautiful reminder that we also have every reason to seek out from that. that pain, something we've never been before. Why is it that our greatest accomplishments come when our backs are to the wall? Our greatest acquisitions after losing something dear to us.

Why is it that we find ourselves in our way only after being lost? I've never heard someone say, thank God I never changed or left or tried something new. No, it's thank God the adversity forced upon me, the courage to even. evolve into something more. Pain is to our potential what water is to a seed. It's the beginning of everything unshackling, opening the gate and making us realize we were sitting on the answers. That adversity doesn't stop you, it makes you stronger.

That the down times lift you up. That when you lose yourself, you find a part of you. that can now become the bridge to your future. See, I understand that things are difficult and challenging. I understand they're not easy, and I'm not asking you to pretend it's not happening or ignore it or close your eyes. I'm asking you to find amidst all of this,

that one thing, one thing that will get you to tomorrow. I'm asking you to find the courage to say, yes, this hurts. Yes, I'm stretched thinner than I've ever been, but I'm still going to find a way. I'm still going to make it happen. Because at the end of the day, you won't remember what hurt or what stood in your way,

but you'll remember what you did about it. You'll remember how you arranged those pieces. How when your instincts said run, you stopped and built something you'll never forget. Pick your head up and open your eyes. I know how you feel. I know what it's like when all you can see is what's missing. I've been there before and most likely I'll be there again.

I'm not here to tell you life is perfect or easy or pain-free, but to remind you that life is happening all around you, forever changing. Its hope and its opportunity, never more than a stone's throw away, and that although it can seem tempting or even reasonable to think that tomorrow will just be more of today, that now is forever, don't. You're merely moving through the seasons of life.

The ups and downs that constitute our most prized possessions, our most beautiful memories. It's an invitation and nothing more. And what I hope you understand is that it's right now. In life's winter, when everything feels, well, dead, cold, black and white, that you have to see life in color. And look, we all know winters can be long, sometimes real long. But if you can find it in your heart to ride it out,

you'll understand that what's in front of you is a door left a jar separating this chapter and the next. It's no more a burden than a blessing. I've always found comfort in the idea that winter is officially a beginning. with everything ahead of you, spring-loaded. And during this time, as snow falls and coats the world in white, as the ordinary, even for a moment in time, becomes a surreal, a reset button, shaking every part of you like a snow globe on Christmas Eve,

winter has this beautiful way of putting its hand on your shoulder and reminding you the difficulty now means the best of life later. And so when you find yourself in the winters of life, remember they're impermanence, that while difficult, while trying, these times are starting blocks. And nothing of value comes to fruition without them.

And then there's spring. When that believing is rewarded, the seeds begin to grow. grow roots and emerge from the ground when for the first time progress evolves from a fairy tale to something tangible, something you can touch, its reassurance beyond the voice in your head. A sign that you've emerged from the valley you once feared was forever. That the color you desperately longed for now appears on tree branches, flowers, its bluer skies, clearer views. And when you find yourself amidst the springs of life, let it reassure

you that the real world always catches up to the one behind your eyes if you simply carry on. Let it remind you that pain becomes progress and that if given the chance life finds away. And then we get to summer. The culmination of all that is good you have arrived. All the waiting, all the suffering, the belief,

the hope, the patience, all manifesting into life at its best. Sand and saltwater regain their relevance. Days are longer. Worries are less. This is the peak, the summit. It's why we dream. And when you find yourself,

In the summers of life, don't miss a moment. Be grateful for every second. Breathe it in. Recognize its magnificence and its splendor, accept its invitation to see the world as you always knew it could be. But remember that summer, like everything else, while it slips away with time.

It's a call to simultaneously appreciate the now while refusing to live under the false pretense that winters can be mitigated, gone, forever, that life has no series of cycles. Endless summer is a state of mind. A state of mind that allows us to navigate through the trials and the tribulations. And the goal is to understand that no summer doesn't last forever. But you can always find. your way back here. There is always a place for you amidst the summers of life, even when

it's hard to see. Even when it feels impossible, cold, dark, and lonely, you are always on your journey back here. Always. My proof, New England in the fall, the reds, the oranges, the yellows, painting for us the most beautiful masterpiece imaginable, as if to signal its infinite presence. And as the portrait falls leaf by leaf, piece by piece onto the ground, yeah, it will be covered up, but it will never be gone. It's the same hand on our shoulder explaining that your world will change, it always has, it always will, but you have everything you need.

So whether you're in winter, spring, summer, or fall, and perhaps that's something only you would know, I ask that you see it for what it is. Another trip around the sun, another tour through those seasons of life. Find that fire so that you can endure winter's cold. Nourish that seed of hope as it springs to life from the ground below you. the summer sun as it lights up the sky. Appreciate those leaves as they float around you like paper planes because all of it.

Each and every part is you. Your story, your triumphant journey through the seasons of life.