Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero - WHEN NOBODY BELIEVED IN YOU | Powerful Motivational Speech

Episode Date: August 24, 2022

"If you don't believe in yourself no one else will."

Just one more day. The power is in just one more day. Don't need to have the whole book written. Stories told or city built. It's not about one universal solution to all your problems. It's about continuing forward until the breakthrough. It's about knowing that when it feels most hopeless to go on, that's precisely when it's most important to do so.

The world is not asking of you everything, just something. So give it something. Keep yourself in the game. Keep your head up and your eyes open. Keep your feet moving, even if you don't know where they may be, leading you. You need not a billion answers, but one breakthrough. One breakthrough. See, we all fall, we all lose our footing. Life can be tough. And being that this is par for the course, the contract we signed before we breathe our first breath of air, it's a fool's errand to exhaust energy on

the occurrence, to be angry at the situation, to feel bad about yourself for wandering there. No, it's about recognizing where you are and then finding it within yourself to step away. One foot closer to the breakthrough, to recapturing what matters. When things become too big, we simply shut down. Complexity is crippling. But truth be told, the path is not complex. Our manufactured interpretation is what's complex. So simplified.

Step forward one more time, a little bit closer to the breakthrough. A little bit nearer to the light at the end of that tunnel. Remember, there is no all-encompassing formula. What there is is the strength that emerges from one's willingness to inch forward. When all seems dark, when temporarily you've forgotten what that sense of excitement feels like. When the thrill of progress seems foreign, shut off the mind. This isn't the time to weigh pros versus cons or this versus that move into the haze

trusting that what you need will reveal itself. Because as long as you don't stop, it most certainly will. You'll find yourself again, your path again. Things will make sense again. But that right is earned now. When we're tired, worn, in our solitude, beaten down, we might not be able to see it in the moment, but that's when the beautiful things are made. So trust that you are the designer you've been looking for all along.

Sometimes all we need is a reset. A new beginning. Fresh start, a transformed perspective. Do you remember those pictures that used to make their way around from time to time and looked pretty obvious at first glance? But if you really examined it, you would see that the picture of the young woman or whatever it was, was also an older woman, right, differing based on how you looked at the lines. And depending on who was looking, they might have a proclivity towards seeing one or the other.

But when made aware of the picture's duality, they could always see both. And there's something to this. This idea is something we should lean on, because I'll tell you what. Sometimes our natural proclivity is to see the thing that's not helpful. The first thing we see is an excuse or self-pity. The first thing we see is a list of insecurities or doubts. And we have to remember to take a step back and look again, to examine harder. Because it's amazing how differently things evolve when you make a point to see their value.

For example, let's say someone has something you want, something you wished was yours. Maybe your default is, you know, you are less than. Your life is not what it should be. But if you step back and looked again, you would see a few things. One, we're all running different races. You're competing against you, not anyone else. Two, think about everything you do have that someone else would give anything for. And three, if you truly do want that thing, how about applauding yourself for having goals, for having desires, for wanting to push the boundaries of life?

Now the question is, can you seek to truly understand? understand what that desire is and map out your path to bring it into existence. This is nothing but an opportunity, right? And how could it be anything else? Life's challenges, life's losses, they are wins. They contain within them the DNA to create change, to progress. But one must be able to move beyond the instinct to label it a problem or a net, next There are and will always be wins where you choose to see wins. As I've heard Tony Robbins mention on many occasions, this isn't closing your eyes and saying,

there are no weeds, there are no weeds, there are no weeds when your garden is full of them. No, it's understanding a simple truth. You'll never leverage value that you don't believe is there. Seeing it is always step one, because it gives you a foundation to stand on as you build. It's picking up the pen and starting that next chapter. It's choosing your worldview. If you lose money, how would one react to? I can't believe it's gone.

Things will never be the same. My life is over. Versus, okay, obviously I learned how to acquire it in the first place. place, time to do it again. I'm wiser, I'm more aware, and life is abundant. The person that wakes up thinking the former would probably have a hard time getting out of bed. The person telling herself the second story would be motivated to go make things happen. Her worldview has incentivized her. That's why thoughts become things. How we think directly translates into how we act and our daily actions become our reality.

Look, we've all found ourselves in situations where we struggle to see the good in things where life knocks us down and the opportunity seems to hide itself. But that's exactly what it's doing. Hiding itself. It is there. It's always there. It's there when you've lost something. It's there when you've taken a wrong turn.

you get the point. And I'm going to differentiate here between simple and easy because the idea of stopping and forcing yourself to find the positive it's simple. But it's not easy. It's oftentimes not the natural thing to do.

But if you can ask that of yourself, you will find the wins that others walk right by. You'll be the change you want in yourself because the outside world will act as the toolbox to make that happen. Remember, we often can't control what the world gives us, but we can always control what we do about it. And that ability is what I believe separates human beings and their level of growth, success, and achievement.

Next time you find yourself down and out, sure, do your thing, handle it how you must. But don't forget that golden rule. It's not what you look at, it's what you see. And when you examine the world around you, point to one, however small value add, that will pick you up, get you back on your feet, and move you forward to that more ideal reality. There's often a vast distinction between what we think is holding us back. and what is actually holding us back. And that may even be putting it lightly.

Most of the time we're just plain misinformed. Most of the time, we're looking externally at irrelevant discrepancies between ourselves and someone else. We're looking at things that happened yesterday, possible outcomes that may be may happen tomorrow, we're creating entire stories, crafting narratives, building hostile worlds that simply don't exist, when what we need is simple to give ourselves permission, to let ourselves walk out that front door and towards what we long for. And this came to light recently. I shared a simple 20-second message on TikTok where basically I highlighted John Green's quote

about the best things in life occurring after we find the courage to depart or leave where we are, right? To build again. And as I was looking at the response, it was both beautiful and eye-opening. Hundreds and hundreds of comments from people saying that the message helped them feel empowered to do what they've been putting off.

And some called it fate. Some called it what they needed to hear at the exact moment. They needed to hear it. And as I'm going through, I keep thinking the same thing over and over and over every single one of these people. They already knew in their hearts

what needed to come next. They knew what would make them feel alive. They knew where the compass was pointing. Yet their default led them to the same place we've all been, waiting for external permission, waiting for life to give us a reason to say, okay. The light is now green. You can go. The time is right.

Now, don't get me wrong, it means the world that a simple message can shift one's perspective that way. I've been on the receiving end. I'm stock looking for some type of guidance we all have, but I think we'd all agree that if that guidance helps us get back on track, then the real question should be, how do we live so that we can stay to the best of our ability on track? Find ourselves less prone to those occurrences, more confident in ourselves, in our dreams, in where we're going. For me, it's been understanding that in my life, I am the one that creates signs and sends the

permission slips. I say go. And when I remember that, I'm free to do what's best for me. I'm simultaneously the architect and the pieces, the wind and the sail. See, you don't need a reason to walk out of a relationship you're not happy in. You don't need a reason to leave a job that's not pushing you to be who you most want to become. You don't. You don't need a reason to leave a job that's not pushing you to be who you most want to become. You don't need a reason to change a habit or reinvent yourself or begin again. Know all you need is the courage to green light what your heart already knows it wants. We think that the external world has the answers for us when in reality we've had them the whole time. We just want something to point to, to say, see, I was right.

But we don't need to be reactive. We can be proactive. You can be the one that lights the fire. When you follow your intuition, your heart, your sense of purpose, life conforms because it has to conform. When you become an immovable object, life around you moves. It makes way. And if it doesn't, then you go back to the drawing board. or you adapt and adjust.

And that's the beauty of life. That's how we build meaning, trusting ourselves to walk into that resistance. Because the friction and the headwind is never what's holding us back. Are they uncomfortable? Yeah. At times, does it scare us?

Sure. It's supposed to. But it's not what holds us. holds you back. Waiting for someone or something to come along and green light your journey through life is what holds you back. And it's funny, I think we again and again overlook the simplest of truth. The hardest part is starting.

It's convincing yourself that one, it's possible and two, you're worth it. Everything else you face from the second you walk out that front of you're not. door can be conquered. In fact, we ourselves grow along the way so that we can rise up and meet the demands of life, but it's unquestionably doable. That thought as you look out the window, right? What if the worst case scenario happens? Can't. Because the worst case scenario is sitting in that seat your whole life, looking out the window, and imagining a world where you found the courage to be more, to explore, to live life as it was meant to be lived.

But let's say, let's say that what we fear does come to fruition. Then I ask, what are the odds, it's reversible, probably high. Let's say I want to start a podcast, and I finally work up the courage, and I get my mic, and I start my show, and no one listens. But I keep going, and I keep going, and nothing sticks. And most importantly, I learn, look, I'm really not. that crazy about this idea. It wasn't what I thought it was. It's not me. Okay, perfect. Now you know, and sure it took time to learn that lesson, but you have the rest of your life

to continue the beautiful experiment to search for what lights you up. But you found the courage to explore, to try, to begin, and you are now better because of it. That's your worst-case scenario? Sounds a lot less scary to me than a life lived sitting there looking out the window. See, we can't let the fear of an unlikely worst case stop the possibility of that, oh, so coveted best case. Don't let the virtually zero percent probability of losing everything overshadow the opportunity to gain everything. Let's never allow ourselves to get caught. standing still waiting for the universe to give us the answer as though we're waiting for a letter in the mail no give yourself permission to see the upside to

make your own decisions and most importantly to live your life there's a quote from Henry David Thoreau that I've learned to love over the years he says we are constantly invited to be who we are meaning essentially there is always a hand, you know, reaching out to invite us to leave the confinement that we've allowed to become our lives, the pressure of the outside world, and attack a world that means the most to us, not obligatory, but for the opportunity. Because it's there, it's perpetually available, and that's what Henry David Thoreau means. And what's interesting is the second we lose sight of this,

Our lives become consumed with things that really have no relevance to our goals or our objectives. In fact, the daily routine becomes the goal. It's the box that needs to be checked to feel accomplished. We do things because, well, isn't that what you're supposed to do? Adher to rules and processes and guidelines, almost like we forget why that routine matters. Like we forget the car has to go somewhere of relevance. You don't just get in and drive it to drive it. That doesn't make sense.

And a friend of mine recently showed me this book of insights from different photographers. It's called The Photographer's Playbook, and it's life lessons that helped each one of them along the way. And one that stood out to me specifically was Andrea Parleto. And she talked about a concept called hibernation or cutting off, temporarily leaving your day-to-day or your craft, so that all the have-toes and the should-bees can dissipate. And you can ask yourself the question that we so quickly lose. The question that should be the target, that should be the foundation we build upon. Who do you want to be?

Because when all is said and done, and you're looking back, that's what will matter. That's what will dictate your happiness. Not that you were five for five on your checklist every day on your 20s, 30s, 40s, and on, right? No, what does it look like when you peel that back? What does it look like under the surface? What makes you you? And sometimes we have to step back, go away, leave the day-to-day world we've created

to see life from a different angle. Eliminate the steps, the requirements, the technicalities, and what are you left with? When you put your head on the pillow at night, what makes you smile? Brony Ware states in her book, Regrets of the dying that not living a life true to oneself was one of the greatest regrets people experienced.

Isn't it worthy of your time, your attention? Don't you owe it to yourself to make sure that your vision is defined and your actions support that? See, anyone can move just to move and anyone can breathe just to breathe. With the ones who make the most of each step, each breath, they put themselves in position to live life differently, to accept the invitation to be who they truly are. To take their inspiration, their gifts, and their dreams, and never look back.

For a handful of years, I'd made this annual trip to the desert in Utah. I'd take some time to be solo to clear my head, leave my phone in the cabin, which didn't have service anyway. I'd grab a backpack with some food, my camera, and I'd just go exploring. From the time the sun came up to the time I went down, I'd follow trails through the canyons, climb over rocks, wedge myself between boulders, traverse open fields, I would get lost in something so far outside the realm of my standard day-to-day that life, well, didn't feel like life. It felt surreal. One day I was out there and I guess it got kind of carried away. making a running video. I looked down at the map as the sun was setting and realized I was miles

from the car in the desert. Not a good place to be. And this panic set over me, right? It was a mix of fear and annoyance with myself for letting something so stupid happen. This was precisely the vulnerability that the routine of our day-to-day lives seeks to mitigate. This is Society 101. We pay taxes and stop at red lights. In exchange for the certainty that we won't die in the middle of a random desert, but hey, look, life comes at you quickly. Suddenly, that safety net wasn't there to protect me.

Now what? I started running in what I believed to be the general direction I came from. Backpack full of camera gear and empty water bottles bouncing up and down with each step. My heart was pounding so fast that it felt like a movie.

It didn't feel real, and as the sun lowered itself behind, the mountains I wasn't quite sure what it would leave for me. Look, we know obstacles hurt, but the unknown really hurt. In the sky, it turned this beautiful blue, purple, otherworldly color. I guess it was the landscape saying goodbye before it faded to black. I knew it would be black, black, like can't see the hand in front of your face black. And as I continued on, the night sure validated my concerns. I had to stop running. Had to walk because I could no longer see the bushes and rocks I was stepping over. Eventually I paused for a second, reeled myself in,

put my hands on my hips, side, looked up. Notice something I never really had before. The sky. Well, that makes zero sense, one might think, considering I'm a human being and I live on Earth, where there's very clearly a sky, but no, not like that. Not like Utah Desert Sky. A trillion tiny candles that felt so real that I felt for the first time nothing separated them from me. I was a part of it. I was immersed in a blanket of stars.

If I could live for 20-something years and never see that, imagine the smaller miracles I've been blindly dancing around. Imagine the beauty that isn't hanging directly over my head. It was out there and I vowed from now on I'd find it just like this path home, but hey, let's start there. And perhaps in the moment was that I felt part of something bigger than my mini crisis. Or maybe it was because common sense had finally set in.

But I got this feeling of calm. By momentarily losing myself in the stars, I came back down to Earth. I understood everything would be okay, that worst case, I'd just pace back and forth until the sun came up. I mean, sure, it wasn't 100% everything would be fine, but is it ever? I proceeded to walk forward. Eyes fixated on the ground in front of me, using the screen on my camera as a guiding light.

Perhaps this wasn't the right path, but at this point it was the one I had committed to. Some time went by, and I saw in the distance what I was pretty sure was either a cell phone or a flashlight, which I know what a concept. I followed it more sure of myself with each step forward, eventually passing a sign indicating that the trailhead

was a quarter of a mile in the same direction. I paused again and smiled to myself. Ultimately, I found the parking lot, hopped in the car, just as the odds suggested I would. And I departed from my mini-adventure. As I was driving back, windows down, headlights cutting through the darkness, the only sound, the tires making their way over the gravel below, I sat there thinking and realized I actually felt sad.

I felt like I wasn't ready to depart that little journey. That I needed that uncertainty in my life. I needed to conquer something new. I thought about the abrupt panic, the wolves, rattlesnakes, and scorpions that dance danced around in my head. And how such a small, almost laughable step outside of my comfort zone felt like a tremendous leap. I guess our most important moments come when we least expect them. And while I learned a lot about myself that night,

I learned that there will be times we find ourselves wandering through the darkness of life. Maybe ill-prepared, angry at ourselves for not foreseeing that things would unfold the way they did. But these obstacles are most likely solvable and small in the grand scheme of things, and that's not even the most important part. They are the gateway into our souls. Into the ecstasy and the adventure that live outside the confines of parameters and checklists and routines.

They remind us to look up and see what really matters, to peel back the manufacturing. or must-haves we erroneously bow down to. I'd live that moment to understand what it meant, to see that the things we most fear are the things we most need. That real dreaming it happens when we're awake and that anytime you feel abandoned or lost or alone, look up at that blanket of stars.

Realize they're not against you, but a part of you. A beacon of hope along the way. And no, they can't promise you answers or guaranteed outcomes. But I can promise you, you wouldn't want that anyway. We all fall down. But only a few choose to get back up. A few depersonalized failure. A few understand that falling is the cost of greatness.

Your reality is not what happens to you. Your reality is how you internalize what happens to you. Or obstacles stop signs, or are they checkpoints along the way to something greater? Checkpoints that make you stronger, build you up, become your armor, that is ultimately the difference. What we misinterpret in life is the meaning behind that difficulty, that pain, that suffering. No one gets a pain-free life. No one gets a free ride.

Suffering is inevitable. As Nietzsche says, to live is to suffer, to survive is to find meaning in the suffering. And what's changed my life, and I don't mean here and there, I mean truly transformed the course and trajectory of what's is simply redefining that which is difficult. I grew up watching the Kobe's and the Brady's of the world. I remember thinking, how do these guys get better when things get difficult? I mean, as a kid, I could feel the pressure watching from the couch, but they somehow elevate themselves when the odds are stacked against them.

Same exact situation that causes most to doubt, to run, to lose their self-belief. What they see that alludes most is that in every pressing moment, there's opportunity. Every loss has something to gain. In every failure, there is victory. Everyone has the same rulebook. It's just that some people only see what is right in front of them. Others learn to read between the lines and create outcomes that have not yet arrived. When things are hard or challenging or uncertain, it's not that you should keep going.

It's that you must keep going. Everything good, everything rewarding, worth having is on the other side of that struggle. Everything meaningful is built from the days you felt like there was no possible way to move on, but did anyway. That is the core of greatness. forward when it would have been easier not to. When you feel the hurt, the emotional turmoil, and I get it, we all do, but beyond that feeling, what are you willing to see? Beyond the ashes, what are you willing to build?

What are you willing to do with those pieces? Because it can be nothing or it can be everything. It all depends on how you choose to step back. to step back and look at the world. Your perspective becomes the roadmap for your reality. So understand that feeling down or lost is normal, but staying down is a choice. There are no problems.

There are stepping stones. The very situations that make you who you are. The little decisions that over time equip you to step up, When it matters most, when the pressure's on, the odds are against you, the rest of the world says no. No matter how hard it gets, there is an answer. Rise above the emotion, the chaos, the present moment, and see the big picture. Not only will you survive, you will be better because of this. Because you kept moving forward when it wasn't easy.

No matter how hard life got, you never lost sight of the opportunity. And that made all the difference. You weren't put here to live in the shadows of life. To exist beyond the sun's grasp, to stay on the outside, looking in. No, you weren't put here to live in the shadows of life. to live in the shadows of life. It's important to remember the difference between now and forever, the distinction between today and tomorrow,

because from time to time they look deceptively similar, especially when we inevitably find ourselves in the darkest of times, when despite our best efforts, our world is reduced to shadows, void of hope. When tomorrow and today have merged into one endless entity, it always seems to be in these times, that we forget that right now is just a moment,

not an assigned permanent, but a bridge to something great. As Victor Frankl says, if there is meaning in life at all, then there must be meaning in suffering. We all suffer, we all hurt, We all go through periods of time where we can't see or hear or feel anything beyond the darkness we find ourselves in, but it's there. Darkness cannot be defined without light.

It's in the definition. Darkness is a partial or total absence of light. They need each other darkness and light. The one thing that can bring darkness to its knees is out there, everywhere, all over. around it. And if there was ever a reason to be hopeful, enthusiastic, if there's ever a reason to believe, it's that a new life is always a light switch away. It's that darkness is as temporary as the day. And the antidote requires only that you believe it to be true. Only that you find the resolve to reach one foot out, to remind yourself of the sun's warmth and the infinite beauty

of a world beyond this temporary darkness because you weren't put here to live in the shadows of life but to re-emerge like a rocket through the earth's stratosphere to swing from star to star like life is a playground and you make the rules

and I think when we look back we'll be nothing but grateful for those times of darkness they in a sense prepared us for the road ahead by giving us what we need most. Perspective. Life lessons. A roadmap to follow.

Because you don't appreciate the light. The sun. The clearer blue skies, the wind on your face, the sound of the waves, the chirping of the birds. No, you don't see the beauty in any of that until even if for a moment it is taken away. You don't learn. about life's abundance until you come face to face with scarcity. You don't learn to give until you've had your world taken away. You don't learn to love until you've experienced heartbreak.

You don't learn courage until you've been overcome by fear. You don't learn to grow until you've been truly stuck. You don't learn to believe until you've looked in the mirror in doubt peers back. You don't know who you are until you learn what you're not. See everyone finds themselves having wandered into the dark, sometimes of their own volition, sometimes of fate. But like leaves changing color in the fall, the earth on its journey around the sun, a wave emerging and falling back into that which it came. It is not an end, but a beginning. Life's way of preparing us for what's to come, introducing us to the infinite possibility of tomorrow because you weren't put here.

To live in the shadows of life, but to emerge from them. To light up the world. No, you weren't put here. To live in the shadows of life. When the ground beneath us shakes, We crave stability. When the heavens open up and rain pours down and we run for shelter. When life presents us with vagueness, with flashes of possibility, we long for mastery.

It's more instinct than anything else. But could it be that that instinct that we run to, like moths to a flame, is leading us astray, that it doesn't have our best interests? interests at heart. Could it be that we're so worried about protecting and maintaining an acceptable image for the world that we forget to build something internally that's worth protecting? What if that's shaking is what brings down the foundations that held us back? What if that rain washes away the limits of yesterday as we evolve into something more?

And what if those flashes of possibility require of us not mastery, no, not yet, but a willingness to be the fool? And what if that willingness isn't an unfortunate dead end but a beginning? In one of his lectures at the University of Toronto, Jordan Peterson said, if you are not willing to be a fool, you can't be a master. In the cycle that is self-discovery, that is growth, we have to at some point step into an arena that's foreign to us, that we don't yet understand. We have to be willing to operate with inadequate resources, trusting that they'll be picked up

along the way. And that's a lot to take in. It's painful to know that others are going to have knowledge and skills and competencies that you won't. that you'll willingly inject yourself into the bottom of some hierarchy with nothing more than aspirations. But that willingness is your vehicle. And what's clear is that everyone wants the moon, but very few people have the courage to start constructing that spaceship. Very few have the courage to be the student.

That's why our inclination is to quit when we can't snap our fingers and magically. beyond our way when we can't leap past that wandering around the unknowns. The reality is we have to fight to scrap to obtain that sense of belonging in a particular competency. And just talking about it brings me back. It's an obstacle that we all face. It's super real to me. I remember being featured on a podcast where the host literally asked me, why should I listen to what you have to say? Right. Like, who are you? Why are you roadmapping your journey? Right. I remember fighting for relevance in an area in which, you know, at the time I knew almost nothing about. And I love how Peterson articulates this battle. He says at some point, you'll want to make a change

and you'll feel like an imposter. And guess what? You are. But you have to be. You'll ultimately feel worse if you don't do it. That's imposter syndrome. Feeling like a stranger in your own body. And guess what, it's not wrong, it's just a beginning. I like explaining it like jumping into a cold pool. Feels uncomfortable at first. It feels out of place, but then things normalize. They become comfortable. And what's the other option?

To fear that minute of discomfort and never jump in? It's what we need to tell ourselves when we want something but the climb seems too steep. Right? That climb is manageable. You'll acclimate. The adversaries. pushing beyond that fear of starting anew, taking your limited understanding, bringing it to

the base of that mountain, a new Goliath, and looking up with confidence. And the question is, can you be foolish enough to do that? And once you've made that ceiling, your next floor, will you be foolish enough to do it again and again and again? And breaking through that fear, knowing that stumbling around, for a period of time doesn't kill you, it's required. It's the inability to show weakness or appear vulnerable. That's what chips away at you for a lifetime.

If you want more, immerse yourself in that cycle of mastery. Start at the bottom and ascend. And when you approach the top, separate yourself and find another ceiling to chase. Replant a seed. Play the role of the fool again. This is the formula for growth, for prosperity, for fulfillment. This is the pathway to anything of substance. You take your L's, you embrace your critics, you swallow your pride,

and move towards a tomorrow that far exceeds today. As your reality changes, your perception changes, the company you keep changes, you'll start to see that what's around you is made by people who are willing to fail and fail often. Our world is when devised by those who could put pride on hold. By those who were humble enough to crawl through the unknown long before they ran anything. Who knew that before they played for any title or championship, they must first play the fool?