You're Never The Only One - Still Think About The One That Got Away? You're Never The Only One...

Episode Date: November 5, 2025

This week - in what is sadly the last episode of Season 3 - Cat leads the conversation and it's all about the one who got away...although for legal reasons (and because Jimmy might read this) Cat wants to make it clear that this is not something she has experienced herself 😆 The girls discuss body count, scrambled organs and Emma (for once) is the one who loses her shit...over Oasis tickets!----------------------------------------------------------------------Despite this being the last episode of the season, the girls still want to hear your thoughts and stories. Send them in!Email: [e-mail]: [phone]DM: @yourenevertheonlyone----------------------------------------------------------------------🙏Thank you to Their Nibs for sponsoring this episode. Use the code YNTOO15 for 15% off, sitewide, at www.theirnibs.com

You're never the only one who thinks about the one who got away. And I have to say, this didn't come from, like, me still being in love for my exes. Donnie's my third. Johnny's my third. He's also number three in body count, too? Oh, no. And he's like, smell it. Hello?

Hey, only me. Hey, babe, how are you? I just wanted to say well done on another incredible season of the podcast. Oh my God, yes, this is the last episode of season three, isn't it? It's pretty fitting that our sponsor for this episode is Their Nibs. Such good planning. And are you wearing your Their Nibs pajamas right now?

Babe, I am never not wearing my Their Nibs pajamas. Fun fact, I actually used to work with Fiona who founded Their Nibs. I didn't know that. Yeah, Fiona has been building this business for years. and to see her success is such a joy. I mean, it's easy to see why their designs are just so fun and colourful and joyful and you know I love joy and I love their take on the traditional striped pyjamas

I'm wearing one right now. Not to mention great for Christmas. And New Year and January. And then in summer, I reckon I could get away with this as a cohort. However and whenever you want to wear you all their nibs pyjamas, you can get 15% off with the code Y-N-T-O-O-15. Oh, it's like a little goodbye present from us to our listeners.

It's a way of saying thank you to all our amazing listeners and support they've given us this season. So they just have to head to TheirNibs.com and use the code Y-N-T-O-O-15, get 15% off. Anyway, night, Cat.

Night, Emma. Hello, and welcome to the podcast forward slash trauma TED Talk. We call it, you're never the only one. And I'd like to think, Cat, by now,

that they kind of get the premise of it. I think they've been around but long enough, but there may be some of you that have wandered in at episode 10? I mean, that literally makes my eye involuntarily twitched, do you know what I mean? The idea of somebody going, I'm going to start episode 10.

Yeah, I couldn't imagine. I have to go right from the beginning every time. But let me kind of fill you in of what's coming up. You're in for just under an hour, if we can keep it tight. If we can keep it tight, just under an hour of unfiltered confessions, unsolicited, oversharing, and the ramblings of two unqualified, commentators whose only goal is to remind you that whatever hot mess express you've had a ticket on

and thought, is it just me? It's not because you are most definitely never the only one. It's so true. I'm feeling very hot mess today. But you're also seen quite Zen. It's really confusing me. It's unnerving me if I'm on it. Is it? Is it the, is it the... Well, it's because it's 5.30, 6 o'clock now. It's because it's late. I'm not a night hour. No, no. We've discussed this in the last season. Anything beyond 3 o'clock. And I I haven't had a nap today. No, no nap. And you've been running around town,

which is knackering. That's coming up in the next bit. I've got to roast you first. Oh shit, go on then. Yeah, so Emma Niclay. Yeah. Love you. Go on.

Here she is again, by my side as always. And despite her surname, she's about as French as a frozen croissant from Liddle. She's less, oh, la la, and more, oh, I just wet myself. Less, jeunise ce qua,

and more jeuniseepa, what the fuck I'm doing? So, Emma, what the fuck have you been doing? Hold on, don't I get to roast you? I thought that was your option. No, no, no, no, no. I've got another one for you. Oh, go for it.

I've got another one. I'm making, I've actually got a list. So I sit there and pick which one am I going to go with today. That's great. Yeah, well, this, I think, is quite gentle. It's always a pleasure to be joined by you, Kat Sims. I mean, by now, you'd all agree. She is the perfect co-host.

She also has the ingredients of the perfect dinner guest. Almost, almost, because she'd bring the wit, she'd bring the conversation. Unfortunately, the only thing she won't bring is an appetite. It's true. It's true. I did have a cheese and egg and salad cream Marks and Spencer sandwich on the way here Also, I heard this the other day

somebody was going on about how they're friends are Ammanjaro and they're not eating and they're just not fun anymore And I was just thinking that's wild To think that because somebody's not shoveling Like I can go for dinner. They said they were the end of dinner parties. No, no, this is a new one. Oh, is it?

Yeah, this was a new one today. Somebody was like, oh, they came to dinner and they didn't eat very much and so they're just boring. No, that wasn't the narrative. That was the narrative. They're boring because they don't eat. It's jealousy. Everybody's jealous.

Right, moving on. on, listen, my week. Yeah. But I'd done nothing really except fuck everything up this week. Okay, cool. Yeah, it's been spectacular. Go on, let it out. Let it out. I literally booked, I literally booked myself in to do about 745 things today. I don't know what happened.

I got the dates mixed up. I didn't realize it was already the 10th of the month. It was a lot. Anyway, I've had to let down 742 people. Very, I'm very sad. I'm supposed to be at Kavana. Do you remember Kavanaugh from the 90s? Give me the song. I can make you feel good. I can make you feel good.

He's a fitty. He's a fitty. He's still a fitty. He is a good friend of mine and his book's out tonight. He's doing his launch part. So I was like, yeah, I'll come to that. Yeah.

And then obviously we had to... Because he was at yours, wasn't he? He was. He was. He was. We had to jiggery, pokery with all the stuff this week because it's the end of term and everything's fucking mental

and sports days and summer fairs and graduations. It's worse than Christmas. It does feel worse than Christmas. It does feel worse than Christmas. And we're doing it in the end of Christmas. the kind of heat that is scrambling my body from the inside out. Do you mean like when you, yeah, I feel like I'm being scrambled from the inside out. It's like a jalapino's armpit.

It is, it is too much. It's too much. So I'm feeling it's been a lot, but I got hypnotized today as well. Okay. Which may be where the Zen thing comes from. Are we talking about what you got hypnotized for? Yeah, I was hypnotized for smoking because I was hypnotized for smoking June last year and it worked. It was brilliant.

It didn't smoke for like whatever it is from June to Mars. much like 10 months something ate my I don't know but then that guy got stabbed outside my house and the first thing I did was going by a packet cigarette right and I just haven't been able to knock it on my head on the head so I went back to my hypnosis guy big love to Tim Smell he is a genius and he hypnotized me today but he also has this thing in his office yeah that he's he has a bottle of water and in it he's put one cigarette and this cigarette has fermented in there for months. Yeah. And he's like, smell it. It is the single worst thing I have ever smelt in my entire life. I literally had to swallow down sick. I get...

You look at it! Hi. Look at it! No. Are you a gipper? The worst. Are you a gipper? I'm not great. I'm not great with really bad smells, like vomit, I can't do. If somebody else is sick, I'm probably sick. Okay. If I get going, it's hard to stop. Okay. I can already see what's like rattling through your brain. Don't do it.

Anyway, that's my week. I'm just feeling a little bit scrambled. Mentally, physically, it's a lot. And I'm ready for... Bed. I'm ready for the summer holidays. I'm not ready for those either. I'm not even close to ready.

Not ready for that shit shows. No. So, yeah. You said I was Zen before. I've talked myself out of Zenness. And back. This is another level. This is another level.

Mine's been pretty similar, if I'm honest. I never feel like it's as full on as yours because I just feel like what you're doing holds more gravitas and the stuff that I... Well, that's all a load of nonsense. I know, this is... I was telling myself that as I was thinking about it. But it's been a lot of ball dropping.

There's a lot of plates falling off whatever they're supposed to be spinning on. I don't even know. I don't even know if I started spinning. I think I just tried to balance them. Yeah. And hope for the best. I've got one tucked under the arm.

Yeah, one between my legs. You know, when you're like walking along with something between your legs because your hands are full, that's kind of where I'm at with my plates. I think my toxic trait is that I just like to overstretch myself. I think that I can do it. And I just, yeah, I've said, yeah, I can do this. Or what can I help you here? And I'm always trying to help other people.

Yeah. We're really similar like that. We overstretch ourselves, but also we overestimate our organizational capabilities. Yeah. So we're over busy. Yeah. And we're woefully underskilled to manage it. Yeah.

I mean it went down last week I left here and I put the wrong pet did you see my stories I haven't even spoken to you about this I left here and I put I put unleaded in the diesel we knew that was going to happen didn't we I can't believe it I was my head was all over the best thing do you know what adds insult to injury I knew I needed petrol from the minute I left the studio and I went to three different petrol stations and I moved on to the next one because each one was out of unleaded and I didn't even need unleaded I needed diesel and then I got there and I was like fucking hell there's something wrong because it's an old car I was like there's something wrong with the petrol cap thing there's something sticking in the way.

No, that's a really expensive mistake. What I'm going to do is I'm just going to drizzle it in. So I stood there for ages. And just before I've been like asked the woman, can you move? Because she parked across two. And she went, just take it. I won't be a minute, dear.

I went, and know how long it takes to fill a car. And it's not a minute. So she would part, you know, in between two petrol pumps. And that was it. And then I called Johnny. And I was, as I'm about to leave, I called him. And I said, there's something wrong with the car petrol. And then I went, oh.

And I just realized, you know, As I'm saying it, I went, I'm really sorry. And he was. And you filled it up? I'd filled up because luckily I was drizzling it in. I thought I just need enough to get home. So I put about 30 quid in. Right.

Anyway, four hours later, sat by the side of the motorway, you know, wait. Anyway. Am I right in thinking it's better to put unleaded in a diesel than it is diesel and unleaded? No, I said this when the guy arrived and he was like, no, it's not. I heard the same thing. And then in such injury, he was like, oh, it's going to take a while because this is one of the trickiest car to do. I'm going to, of course, fucking in. So that included me.

Is that the stinky car too? Yeah, it's a stinky car as well. Like, and I was really embarrassed. You should have, honestly, just have left. I would have just left it. I'd have been like, you know what I? He was like, do you want to give me the keys? I was like, I don't want to hand the back if I was like, not really.

I don't have much option. It smells of my dog's asshole. I didn't even tell him. I just, I just ignored it. And just like, yeah. But anyway, that, that was interesting. So that was a shit show because I had to call my mother-in-law, say to a look, I'm not going to be there to pick up Molly because. because, you know, she had stepped in last minute.

It's a catalogue of errors. Somebody to pick up Bali from school. They had to let the dog kennel know that I'd be late to pick them. Anyway, it was, and then I said, oh, God, I've got to realize I got a foot appointment at the hospital, Molly. So I had to call my basically, like, blind mother-in-law and say, hey, do you think, it's just eight minutes walk from your house. I'm going to send you a map.

I'm going to put pictures and Molly's going to follow it. They called me just as the AI guy was arriving. We've been walking around for 45 minutes. Batty's getting really up. upset. And I was like, I'm so sorry. And then they went, then they found it. Appointment was the wrong day. It was, it was next week. Yeah, this is, this is exactly. This is exactly the sort of stuff I'm talking about. And that's when it started. Totally. And it always happens at once. It's not like you just miss an appointment one day. It's like you miss an appointment when you've put the wrong petrol in the car, when you've only got your blind mother in law to help you. Like, it's a lot.

And then Johnny fucked me off because then he was like, you shouldn't have asked mum to do that. And I was like, that's what we're taking from this. Not what I've, but I'm being through. And I also, I did that thing where I'm really good now because I'm not giving you excuse to go, why you such a cunt. Oh, I said it. Why is such an asshole? You said it before I did. I know.

And I was like, okay, I'm just going to let everyone know I'm due on. I'm due on. So I kind of feel like that should allow, you know, a bit of grace. There was no grace. No. I feel like I've been clamouring for cuddles and getting rejected. It's not, it's not been good. To be fair.

Yeah. I mean, putting the wrong petrol in is, he was calm about it. he was so chilled he was like don't worry do you know why should I tell you why he was calm because he was on a back-to-back 50th on across two days okay that were basically two rounds of golf two different parties two luxury hotels culminating in a free ticket to fucking oasis which I excuse me can I just say I queued like four hours on the phone to get a ticket for oasis okay then I got through to the ballot failed at that as well you throw into that my period of full moon and fucking

the heat I'm sorry but I No. Well, listen, you might get an oasis ticket at some point. You know, definitely, maybe. You bought it back. You bought it back. Thank you. Let's move on.

So, yeah. I did want to show you something. I went off on one then, but I had to show you something. Okay, go. And it kind of, it leads nicely from what we were speaking about the other week, about cat fishing. And you know, you were talking about loving Jennifer Anderson. You want to know what's going on.

I love her so much. She's exactly the person. If we met, I have a spider sense about these things. Me and Jen would be mates. Oh, 100%. Honey pee. Honey pea. So basically, I saw this news article and it's one of the things that managed to just ever so slightly raise a smile from me over the last week. I did actually tell my husband this morning, I put my head in my hands and I said, I feel like I just want to put you all under the patio and live here by myself. All right, Fred. Let's move on. So a British man has revealed how he was conned out of £200 by scammers using AI to impersonate

Jennifer Aniston, okay. Now before we move on, I want you to take a little look at him at the back. On the back, we've got a picture. Here he is. Paul Davis, 43 from Southampton, who truly believed he was in a relationship with Friends star Jennifer Aniston after receiving fake videos, a doctor driving license and a messages calling him,

my love, and asking for help with her Apple subscription. Do you know what? I want the confidence of that man. Because, like, I'm looking at him, and I'm thinking, sure he's love. Yeah. Obviously not the sharpest tool in the box. I'm sure he's lovely and I'm thinking there's got to be part of him that thinks he's not, this he's not just punching.

Do you know what I mean? He's like scrambling up fucking Everest to reach even her heel, the flaky skin on her heel. And the fact that there was part of him that genuinely thought, this was going, is just, I want that confidence. I want that level of confidence. And not one alarm bell rang, even though the fraudsters also posed as Elon Musk,

Mark Zuckerberg, sending Paul AI-generated videos and he got one by them all? Yeah, no, the same. They were all friends. They were all being friends of Jens. Oh, he thought he was in the group. He was in the in crowd. And they even sent him videos

claiming he won prices like cash and a rangerover. But here's the thing, right? So Jennifer Anderson, Elon Musk, Why do they need a couple of hundred quid from this guy? Do I mean, at what point did the guy not go? No. I mean, Elon, I can spot you a tenor, but like, I'm not sure I get it. Like, do you not have enough?

One of our catfish stories was talking about how their auntie was like getting done for, like, for Apple music credit. Last week, a week before, whatever it was. So this is what she was asking. She needed help with her Apple subscription. I don't know if you saw the picture of her holding up the I Love You So she's from Southampton So she needs her without a look of the words And she's gone to Paul Davis 43 from Southampton

Rather than I don't know One of her many I don't know, she just fell in love with him Obviously he's a technical whiz Anyway And yet not wizzy enough to spot AI Clearly not When it comes looking on his love door

And she'll always be the one that Paul 43 from Northampton feels that got away Okay, then I will leave Look at that, it's a segue It's a perfect segue That's why they don't pay me the big bucks Not yet Any more

So we are That's what we're talking about You're never the only one who thinks about the one who got away And I have to say This didn't come from like me Still being in love of my exes But it did come if I have to admit From me

Going through a period of getting quite interested in googling, like finding my exit. Like, you know, because we've got such access to people, haven't we? And they'll never, ever know. So I thought I'll go through the list. I was there for a month. I mean, although we've heard quite a few, so I'm still, I still can't stop thinking about the bald man in Berlin.

Yeah, I didn't, I couldn't pick him out of a lineup, to be honest. Anyway, so I've done a bit of Googling. And obviously, when I was Googling, there are some guys that I'm like really delighted to see you're happy, look like they're doing really well. Then there's some guys that I'm like, I feel like you probably do a bit, like I don't want them, I don't want to discover they run a really successful company and become super millionaires, so I mean they don't deserve that.

They're not that nice. Okay. Do you know what I mean? They weren't nice to me, therefore they do not deserve nice things. Okay. So it's not their nice people, it's because they weren't nice to you. Yeah, they were, yeah, isn't it the same thing? Not really, no.

So nice people can be mean to me. Yeah, because if they don't want to be with you, that's just like... No, it wasn't just saying I didn't want to be with me. They were like... Assholes. Okay, let the, yeah, assholes can, yeah. Anyway, and then there's obviously some that, you know,

if I'd have spotted, if I'd have spotted an announcement for a memorial service, it would have been fine too. Yeah, really? Wow. Yeah. Maybe in prison. That was, I was, there was a couple, I was like, maybe they're in prison. That's just disappeared, my ex. I can't find him anywhere.

I have one like that, completely gone. It's so weird. It doesn't surprise me. He was always a bit odd. Oh. It was a weird relationship It was why I shouldn't have gone anywhere near it But I did because I was a bit lonely and sad

Okay, lucky Jimmy Anyway, Jimmy's obviously For legal reasons I just want to make it clear That Jimmy is my person And I'm sticking with him His face, when you did the story on Instagram You chose to do it

Just so he was behind Doing something nice in the kitchen Honestly, it cracks me up He was very funny He was like, I'm right here I know And it's almost Because he's always like

I hate Instagram, don't make me do it, don't move it. And then there he was, they're in the background, making it all about him, smashed it, did a great job. Anyway, Jimmy is the only person I ever want to be with a better life than any, I could imagine, with anybody else. But I think also, there's a lot of, when you look back at those boys that you were with, there's a lot of remembering also that time of your life as well, like what you were like. And even though on a deeper spiritual level, I'd no fucking clue who I was, it was still. quite light and fun do you know what I mean there was lots there weren't responsibilities there weren't kids there was just like my job my mates and this guy at the time yeah yeah that's quite alluring it's quite you know when you fucking crumbling under the weight of the fucking mental load and

your kids and your husband and the work and the not getting anything right yeah there's something quite attractive about going back to that time when it was literally do I have enough money to get home. Yeah, I get it. It actually becomes less about the person and more about the time and the person you were. And also, those relationships when you didn't have that responsibility were much more simple. Like, it was

just sex and fun. Do you know what I mean? It wasn't like, we need to pay the fucking mortgage. Oh, God, you're making it sounds so great. Stop. I know. Anyway, yeah. So, I was going through, and I can put hand on heart say that I don't think,

if I was to break up with Jimmy, I don't think I'd go back and reach out to any of them. Right, okay. Do you? Do you have any that you think you might go? Oh, no. I mean, I haven't, I'm not that, you know, I haven't had that many partners,

so I'm quite inexperienced in that way. Like, by boyfriends, but I've only had like... How many boyfriends have you had? Donnie's my third. Johnny's my third. So you also number three in body count, too. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Thank God. For a minute, I thought, you think you know a girl. I'm still quite low though What is it? I don't know I'd have to think about it I've never really thought about it But it's not like loads

I think it's probably like just I could do on both hands Really? Yeah I think I'd need your hands My hands, his hands How many kids have you brought with you today? I've got three kids for me today

I probably need most of their hands too Don't bring my kids into your sordid Body count please But even though I am not Yearning for a love of yesteryear yes there are plenty of you who are i think this is going to need a bonus episode isn't it i don't know if we'll get through it all if we don't go through it all i have to say there's one that made me cry oh no and i made me cry this girl who is widely known to have a lump of coal

where our heart should be yeah anyway um Samantha emailed yeah i'm an ex-actress right obviously everybody needs you'll get i'll show up and i'll carry on right i'm not having a stroke today i'm an ex-actress and when I was younger I went to a drama group that a lot of northern actors got their skills honed at and many went on to work successfully yeah I was in love love love she says with a lad at the group he was funny talented and kind but also a bit troubled I had such a thing then for troubled boys I wanted to fix me too darling you're never the only one we had a few moments we were never together but a few things happened a bit of a finger behind the bike said too much don't know where that came from he was also really good friends with my older brother

so it was a bit awkward. I worked a fair bit in the old business and then he started to work. He was about to work on a show that I'd done the year before. We chatted a bit and I was trying to arrange to meet up for a coffee

when he was going to start filming. But he then ghosted me. I was gutted. I left acting and he has gone on to be a very successful actor as I knew he would because as I said he was talented

he just had that spark. For a long time I couldn't watch anything he was in because I just always wondered what if. I'm now happily married with two children. I adore my husband. He wasn't. troubled. I didn't need him to fix. I didn't need to fix him. He fixed me. I now do watch the one that

got away on various roles and I'm so happy he's succeeding. He deserved to. He's amazing. Obviously I went straight and Googled her name. I found her. Couldn't find where she went to, I couldn't do anything more. I was also very short of time. I think with a little bit more time. Northern. I could have got there. It's a northern actor then. It's a northern actor. I was like, is it Will Mela, I don't know, like, not that great is he. No, I don't think he's very, very successful. He's hosting, like, police who do crime. No, no, no, he was brilliant in the Mr. Bates.

He was great in that. He was amazing. His story about the cat is still my favourite story. Do you remember? No. Oh, he lost his cat. Will Mella, I mean, he tells it so much better, but he lost his cat and went off and everybody's really sad and whatever, and then this cat comes back.

And he's like, oh, great, but the cat doesn't look very well. So they take the cat to the vet. And the vet's, like, I'm really sorry the cat's got cancer. Like, he's like, but the kids were devastated so, of course, we ended up paying loads of money to try and save the cat. And we couldn't save the cat.

I had to pay loads of money to have the cat put down because that's not cheap either. He's like, and then, so we had the cat on the mantelpiece, like ashes. And then... No, the cat walked in. The cat walked back. Turns out, it wasn't our cat.

Our cat came back. He's like, I've paid for some other fucker's cat to have cancer and die. and my cat is now back. Oh, my God. Anyway, he tells it better. I didn't do bad job, but anyway. This is, do you want the tissues one now?

Should we go? We'll go through a few more short shots. Oh, shitting how? We'll go through a few short and sharp ones first. Okay. Okay, this was, as please keep me anonymous, I was in love with my high school crush from the age of 14. He was 16.

I admired him from afar for two years, but never did anything about it. 16, I went off to college and he went off to uni, both in different towns. We were back home on Christmas, had a few drunken snogs over the holidays. I tried to play it cool, but was secretly over the moon.

that something had finally happened. Both went back to college. He got himself a girlfriend. He went on to marry her and had a couple of kids and they're still together. I went on to have several failed relationships including two divorces

and I'm now a single mum. We loosely kept in touch via social media wishing each other happy birthday. We bumped into each other at gigs and I think about him often. I recently sent him a message out of the blue to see how he's doing

checking if he's still happily married. I was about to say. He is. Boom. She says. Anyway, we got chatting about the past and it turns out I did so well at playing it call.

after a drunken encounters that he thought I didn't like him he really liked me but said he was intimidated by me and thought he was and thought I thought he was an annoying loser so the moral of the story is if you like someone don't play a call

shoot your shot shoot your shot oh my god that got me that one okay this one blew my mind I met my one that got away in Miss Fitton's A level English class do you know who Miss Fitton is no I'm Miss Fitton

No you're not Yeah it's Mike's student It's not It is But how can they how old are they I was teaching in 2006, 2007, 2008 so they're like, they're like 30. We don't want to talk about it.

It's a lot. Okay, wow, okay. Anyway, she says, I met my... Oh, when you said on the... Yes, I was with serious. I didn't read it because I like to listen and... I met my one that got away and misfiton's A-level English class. Obviously, I was like, you're going to tell me immediately who it is.

She didn't. We dated after we left school for a couple of years, but unfortunately broke up because I'd gone to uni. He was in the military and we couldn't do long distance. We always stayed very close friends. And for the last 15 years, we would meet up for, wild weekends away. Oh, I like her.

But it's weird because I still think of her as like sitting in her uniform doing a GCSEs. So I'm going to, it's, it's hard for me to read. But anyway, if we're wild weekends away, if we were both single. And if we weren't single, we would meet for technically not cheating drinks. Last time I saw him was just after I left my ex-husband. He was planning several months long hikes across North America and I wanted to settle in the Cotswolds and have more children. So it was never going to work out for us.

he wouldn't have been happy settling down and I wouldn't have been happy following him around the world. I'm now very happy with my new partner and our three kids. The last time I heard from him was when he sent me a picture of himself kayaking in Alberta

asking when we were going to have one of our weekends again. Oh God. And then she didn't tell me whether she was having another weekend again. I don't think. He sounds like he's very unfulfilled. Yes.

Well, and also I can't think who it would have been but I will get the information. So we need to know the actor and we need to know the student. I don't mind it. I'm not knowing about your student. The act, I, that's got me, that's clickbaited me. Yeah, come on Sam, tell us who it is.

That's got you. Right, I'm going to do the sad one. Are you ready? Oh, God. I've got to find it now. Ben, have you got any tissues? Right, how do we say, I say tissue. I'm going to hold it again.

Do you say tissue? No, I say tissue. Tissue, okay, just fine. Okay, it's a long one, so it's going to be, it feels like it needs that music. Was it Simon Mayer that you said, Do, do, do do do, do, do. Yeah. Plansky's Romeo and Juliet.

Oh, right. Well. Right, hi, cat. Fair warning, grab your tussies. I just watched your hilarious post with Jimmy about wanting stories about the one that got away. And while this story is technically not my own, the reasons why I'm sharing it and not my sister-in-law will become clear. It's become a much-loved story in our family, and I thought I would send it to you.

My sister-in-law and best friend Francesca, who she also refers to as Frankie, dated a lovely guy called Mike in her 20s. He had a previous partner and a young daughter and hailed all the way from Canada. They were very happy together, but as often happens with relationships, life got in the way and the pull of creating a family unit with his previous partner and having more children, something Frankie wasn't ready for at the time, meant they split up. A few years later, Mike managed to overstay his UK visa and was deported back to Canada. Fast forward about eight years.

Frankie had had had a son but was not with the father. She got back in touch with Mike and had started to find ways to meet up with him. Her family is half Italian and they had a property in Italy so they would both book holidays there. He from Canada and she from the UK. She also flew to Canada when her baby was six months old and stayed with him and his family.

All seemed to be getting back on track to them rekindling their romance when disaster struck and Frankie was diagnosed with breast cancer. Being a single mother, working full time and battling cancer meant that her romance with a man that couldn't come to the UK and support her had to be put on the back burner. Again, fast forward another four or five years. Frankie had beaten cancer and was living life to the full,

but was still single. When the worst news any cancer survivor could hear came from the doctors after getting a niggling leg pain checked on, the cancer was back and it had spread to her liver and bones. It was terminal. From being diagnosed in 2015, it was only a few short years until 2018 when she passed away. But very shortly after her diagnosis,

she travelled solo over to Canada and asked Mike to marry her and come back to the UK. She personally sorted all the paperwork to get him a visa based on the fact that he was marrying a UK national and knowing full well that when she died, he would automatically gain full UK residency and be able to spend more time with his two girls who he'd had to leave in the UK when he was deported all those years ago. As I mentioned, she got the terminal diagnosis in the summer of 2015 and by July 2016 he was in the UK for the first time in nearly 15 years getting married to the woman he had loved all that time. They lived together for only two short years,

but packed in a lifetime of memories, and Mike still lives in the UK now is a much-loved member of Frankie's family and is in constant contact with Frankie's son and his two girls who regularly come and stay with him and get to spend so much more time with him now he's a UK resident. While this may not be the kind of story you had in mind, it may help any of your listeners on the podcast who are on the fence.

The only regret Frankie had was that they didn't sort of a viable way for Mike and her to be together soon. sooner. But perhaps the diagnosis made that an easier answer for her as to whether he was the one. Who knows? All I know is that they were a beautiful couple and those last few years of her life were made all the sweeter for her getting the one who got away back in her life. As always, thank you for your wonderful content. It really does make a difference and help me see that I am not the only one. She's gone. She's gone.

I was already gone about halfway through. It's gone. Oh, it's not much good. Can't talk. it's really sad but also they got those two years I know that's what I keep yeah they got those two years and two amazing years sometimes that's the way it has to be

better than a lifetime in a marriage that's mediocre or unhappy or do you know what I mean I just think yeah that's totally beautiful yeah I agree that's like that's like notebook worthy like kind of I know right film isn't it is it's a film there's a film there thank you for sending that in and sharing it with us

I have one for the podcast when I was 20 I was working at a temp agency doing lots of different office jobs one came up for a warehouse order controller my first day and i met a guy that i had an electric connection with and just couldn't get him off my mind at all when in his company i couldn't keep my hands off him people told us to get a room but he was married unhappily unfortunately for him we had a very passionate affair ending with me being sacked and him being given this is not a great story is it it's not the love story we were all looking for but let's see my end happily and him being given an ultimatum the kids or your thing on the side this being me i was young and he older i thought i had i thought it had no future so i told him to go

not wanting to split him from his kids fast forward 10 years later he had divorced and i had also escaped an abusive relationship and divorced only to reconnect with the past lover i never really got over and start afresh with him we've now been together 12 years married 11 and 12 years married 11 and have a 7 year old together best thing ever knowing you get to finish what you started yes um oh that's lovely i know i know i know where my ex is i struggle to know if it's him i miss or me at the time true story that's like what you were saying or me at the time that's true i don't want to say too much more in case his new partner is about i have to keep telling myself i let him go because there was

something not right i can't help but feel despite us both moving on that our past will cross again It makes me smile. It's also quite like, I sort of get it, but when I read them out, I also start to feel like it's, is it holding people back? I was thinking exactly the same thing. It feels like it needs unpacking for them,

like, as to, like, you know, the fact that she even started by saying, I don't know if it's me at that time that I'm missing or him. Yeah, I totally. That's what she said, didn't she? Yeah, how I misread it. But also, I just think it's, there's something else going on maybe.

Not all the time. Whoa, whoa, whoa, no, not that one. My first boyfriend, I was with two years and my older brother bought his mate home from work and I fancied the pants off them. I phoned my boyfriend up and dumped him. Hold on. Just because she fancied him,

she phoned up her boyfriend, even though she didn't know if there was any chance. She just phoned up her boyfriend. Now, I've actually seen someone that I fancy me way more than you, so. It's over. It's over. It's done.

He cried. The boyfriend. Yeah. Yeah. 25 years maybe more later and happily married, I phoned him up one day to apologize for dumping him. Yeah. I googled his business and found his number because of the guilt I carried but did check

that it was okay to talk first and did it during the day so it not to cause an issue. He was actually pleased I called. He's married and I did also tell my husband I was doing it closure all round. Do you know what that is? I did not expect any stories like that. What? That sounds like an amends. I like it.

It's like somebody's on the 12-set program and they're going to go and make their own amends. Oh, I like that, though. I love that. I mean, that is a really, actually, that's a great topic maybe for next season. Yes. Yes. The best closure you ever got.

Yeah, the amends that you wish you could make or something like that. Yeah, but imagine some great closure stories. All right, last one. And then we've got a voice note. Hey, ladies, saw your post, R.E. The one that got away and felt seen. Oh.

I have a wonderful partner now who I love dearly. And I'd hate to hurt him in any ways. literally marvelous dot dot dot dot dot like that dot dot dot dot dot dot i know it's the way you said it i know it's because she's like he's literally marvelous but there was another who got away a few years ago my first love post-divorce who will stay with me forever and i'll always wonder what if when i met him it's very poetic when i met him the earth shifted on its axis oh god what happens it's like it's like reading virginia andrew that's why you're loving it aren't you Yeah. When I met him, the earth shifted on its axis and I felt a soul connection like something out of a movie. We were together for a few years and I believe he felt the same way. But sadly, I had to relocate.

No. I thought we've gone through all this romantic, poetic language, but then I had to relocate. We'll circle back on that later, shall we? We tried for a while, but it was otherworldly. And I don't think it's possible to feel anything like that again. I think about him daily. And while we couldn't be together for practical reasons, I think I'll always be in love with him. He's also with someone else now. I'm such a romantic. I think that kind of, if I found a love like that, I just, the relocation thing. But is it love? Because I think, I think, go on. When I think about the boys that I had that, like.

So neggy. No, but there's like there's an infatuation, isn't there? Yes, but she said he felt the same, she thinks. Well, they felt the same, but it wasn't the same kind of love that I have with Jimmy now. It was like really, you know, that like, you're not quite sure. that quite insecure, like, that kind of like, I really like him, does he like me? Is he thinking about me?

Is he calling somebody else? Maybe he's not going to somebody else. No, why hasn't he written? You know, all of that stuff. Yeah. I don't get that with Jeremy. It's just like, I fucking know he loves me. Yeah.

Like, it's quiet. That kind of tense, it's stressful. It's not, is that. But isn't, yeah, but yeah, I guess that's about the man and the personality and. Totally. Yeah. Anyway, should we do the voice note?

Yeah. I haven't listened to this. Oh, gosh. It's a bit of a worry. Yeah. But I quite like. it going rogue. I'm Danny and there was one that got away and his name was Jay and I was 18 and I met him across a cloud a crowded dance floor in a really grotty nightclub in Leicester

and get this huge smile these blue eyes that lit up and this kind of smock of dark coloured hair and we almost instantly like our worlds collided and we started seeing each other. Bear in mind I was 18. I was about to go back to university for my second year. He was about to go for his first year. We dated for five wonderful weeks. Had this amazing one day where we went to Norfolk for the day on a day trip and all of those kind of wonderful things and then all of a sudden he broke it up with me but then it didn't stop there and it didn't end and we stayed in touch even though we'd got on with other people in the meantime and I had a massive like break up with one person and there was Jay and then he came up to York for my 21st birthday and we were about

to kind of rekindle everything but then I went back to the other person that I was with before and then there was a two and throw back and forth kind of thing where in my occasion message each other or something. But then, years go by. And I always wonder, what's he the one? Oh, my God. Do you know what I'm living for this content right now? Danny and Jay.

That's got a bit. Danny and Jay, we're talking about York. We're talking about Leicester. Yeah. We're talking about going to university. Like if Danny or Jay, if anybody who knows Danny and Jay listening. But surely, like, she could look him up in this day and age. But why did he, why did he down?

after Norfolk? I don't think Norfolk was the thing. No, no, no. I mean... I don't think he was like, listen, I've realised... I've not been to Norfolk. We're not good on day trips together. It's never going to work. I'm not saying that.

But like I feel like... Has she got closure on that kind of situation? No, he was breadcrumbing a little bit then. It sounds like he kept coming back. I was a big breadcrumb picker-upper up. Oh, are you? Yeah. I think I would have done anything for some boys.

You were the gretel of the dating world. Yeah. So that's what. what I want to know, why did he initially dump her and then, you know, kind of keep coming. Yeah, we need more info. I feel like I need to want, yeah, I want to know before I can say, go find your man. Go find your man. Right, listen, if you've got anything that you want to say about the one that got away,

please, please do not think you've missed the boat. We can continue. Are you rounding things up? Are you the way I was going to? Oh, where are we? What are we on timing? Oh, I mean, I've got a few more. Can we feel a few more, Ben?

Are you enjoying them? I like it. Yeah, I like it. I like it. Okay. All right, let's see. Now I'm confused as to which ones I've done and which ones I haven't done.

Take your time. Take your time. Then we've done that. That's my ex-student. Oh, my God. Oh, we haven't done this one. So many come through. So many.

It was a lot. I have one who got away story. I met him in Rio de Janeiro in 2012, age 28. Me married, him with a girlfriend. Whoa. Hold on a minute. Hold on a minute. Hold on a minute.

Yeah. You're on holiday with your husband. husband in Rio de Janeiro? Well, no, she doesn't say that he's there. She's married, but she doesn't say he's there with her. Oh, okay. She could be on a work trip, I don't know. Oh, okay, okay, okay.

I was just thinking, you know, on an all-inclusive and you're like, hook up with someone who's there with their girlfriend. It's a bit white lotus, isn't it? That's what I always say to Jimmy, I'm like, listen, if we're going on an all-inclusive, I'm like, whatever you do, don't fucking make friends straight out the gate. Why? Well, because he makes friends with everybody, and then you see them all the time. You can't be away from them.

You're trapped in a fucking resort with them. Oh, it's more awkward than seeing that same person on the road. You know, the head tilt and the nod. Yeah, that's awful. Yeah, but it's just like Jimmy commits too soon. Too soon. And then you end up dodging. You go, we can't go in that restaurant because look, who's there?

They'll see us. And then, you know, the boring Barney and Beryl that you made friends with. Hey, hi. This is my friend Jason. Want to see how my beers were doing. See, I was different. When we were away at Christmas, I was desperate to find somebody else to talk to. I felt like, because Johnny and I, what we do, when we go out, we go separate ways, like, have fun, and then we come back together and then we have like a little after party together.

Whereas this was like a constant after party and that dynamic did not work for me. Also, I wasn't sleeping with the cock blockers in our room, you know, the children. So like, I needed some kind of like fun outside of that. Yeah. Did you find anybody? No. No. No, you weren't, yeah.

Right at the last minute we did. Oh, yeah, they were leaving the next day. They're the friends that got away. They're the friends that got away. and I gave off a real air of desperation as well, like wanting to be friends. Almost a stench. Oh, yeah.

Oh, no. Reek of it, I did. Oh, no. I know that smell well. I sit next to you every week. Like that bag in the bottle. Oh! I cannot tell you how grim that was.

Oh, I can imagine. Anyway, so she's in Rio de Janeiro. She's aged 28. Yeah. She's married. He's got a girlfriend. We had a passionate, and I mean passionate affair. For four months until I had to leave and return.

to the UK, husband's job was ending. Oh, so she was. She was living there in Rio de Janeiro with her husband. They had a passionate affair for four months. Then he was going back to the UK. But he was the love of my life and he said he felt the same. We hatched a plan to split with respective partners and reunite back in Rio six months later. And one month into our long distance relationship, his girlfriend hacked his Facebook and discovered everything. Blocked me on all channels. so I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. After a year of the worst heartbreak I've ever experienced, I finally moved on,

although never stopped thinking about him and wondering. Did you, well, I want to know, did you leave your partner? Or did you think, oh, seeing as I've got busted, they might as well stick. Like, I'm not going to twist anymore, I'll stick. Is that what she, did you think she's still with your partner? I need to know.

I don't know, but I feel like if he wanted to find her and get in contact with her again, he could. 2012 I'm not I'm just saying like if you want but I'm just saying there's no 2012 it's not like there was Instagram name no but 2012 Facebook maybe another you could set up another account maybe anyway there's no names but if you are a man if you're literally the only man listening to this podcast and it just so happens that you're also the man that had a passionate affair in Rio de Janeiro in 2012 with a 28 year old girl

whose name I'm not going to say, for probably legal reasons, then get in touch. We can hook you back up again. I mean, if we don't find him based on that. I want to bring somebody back together. Come on. Who do you think you are? Oh, come on.

I need to live vicariously through someone. Where have we got? Can I be anonymous if you use this? Always. Oh, yes, we've done that one. Just listen, guys. Any stories, anything you want to send in, any voice notes. But you do have to be very clear that you want to be anonymous.

because otherwise I will out you. Hey, can we do, can we voice code, Ben? Can we make, like, make voices sound like they're doing on Crime Watch? Can we do that so you can augment their voice? We can. See, we can even car up your voice if you want to do it on a voice note. You see, anonymity all the way and guaranteed. Although, you know, it's more fun if you don't.

Okay, I thought about and mourned the one for more than five years. I was heartbroken. I found out he married somebody else eight months after he left me. Oh, that does hurt. Do you know what? That sort of happened. to me as well the guy who I was like drunkenly after four years of being messed around I was like I love you then he got up and left literally never saw him again apart from when he delivered a

painting he met a girl maybe the next weekend and married her it's mad that isn't he was the guy that was never going to commit do I mean I was his longest girlfriend mostly because I just fucking didn't have any self-worth and just did whatever he wanted me to do yeah but I was but he married the next one like yeah I was like when you know you know it's hard to get over that. Jesus Christ. But hey, look at you if that hadn't happened. Well, so anyway, you're going to be with Jimmy.

Well, listen, I found out married somebody else eight months after he left me. That destroyed me. Finally, his sister told me the wife was an alcoholic and she dragged him to Helen. Listen, is this, what? Is this like somebody who told me, is this my sister or his sister or whatever? He doesn't have a sister, that's fine. Finally, his sister told me the wife was an alcoholic and she dragged him to Helen back every single day and he was missing me.

Oh! That miraculously healed me. Oh, I'm not proud, but the Chardon Freuder. Yes. Yeah. And karma had my back and I'm better than ever, single by choice. Oh, great. Okay.

Happy with that situation? Yeah. I still want somebody to get back together. Yeah. But that wasn't the moral of the story, was it? The girl who died. Well, I know, but that was lovely and that was enough because actually the podcast topic was the one that got away.

Yeah, so I suppose it isn't about. the people that it's not but we can do one of those if you want if it make you happy I'm all right thanks are you sure yeah anyway I am honestly delighted with the response to it and we will definitely if you are listening to it we will definitely be it's not too late you can still get in touch so make sure that you do that and it doesn't just have to be about the one who got away you can talk to us about any of the other topics we've talked about this season last season or just any story that you think might make us might raise a titter.

Yeah, absolutely. To be honest. Well, you laugh at anything. Yeah, I'm pretty easy. Yeah, in that way. It would be great to get some ideas in for things you'd like us to discuss as well next season. In season four,

oh, in season four of, You're never the only one. We can get, if we can get Brian Blessed to do an actual voiceover, us let's manifest the fuck out of that please we need to get him to do an intro and go yeah and now it's time and now it's time for you're never the only one hold on i bet judy dench knows him and i think we've gotten in with judy haven't we yeah also jimmy knows him did i tell you about the time i was in cats i made that role my own is apparently how it finished

you didn't know that bit i found that out today speaking of finishing i think it's time we did I've really enjoyed this episode, Cat. I don't know whether it's because you're subdued or... No, well, I feel like I've messed it all up, so it's great. I don't even know what we're doing. I don't know what that says. So basically, as Katz-in, if you want to get in touch with us, about anything whatsoever.

And random shit, we just love it. Do you know what I mean? Send us some funny... Oh, oh, yes. We want your impressions. Did you put it out yet? No, because my phone's been not working either. Okay, it's all happening, isn't it?

Anyway, we want your impressions because obviously my Brian, and Blessed Impression is so good. But you will never know that it's Brian? Yes, you would actually know that it was Brian. It's not as bad as you think it is. It's better than you make out it to be. It's not as good as Jimmy's. Actually, he did redo it this morning and I was like, yeah, that's really good.

But what we want is we want your impressions. Voice notice your impressions and we want as many as we can get. I think it's a great bonus episode. It doesn't have to be you if it's a family member that does an absolutely cracking impression. Oh yeah, no, it doesn't have to be. We'll just, we'll take any of them. Even if a child does it, fine. Legally, can we, we do it? Yeah, we'll do it.

Yeah, we'll imply permission because the parents sent it in. Exactly. Either way, you'll need this number. And actually... Because there's also, there's probably other parents out there who like to exploit their children for, like, content. Oh, it's great. And virality. It's great. It's great.

There's probably loads of them. Yeah, yeah. Money to be made. Money to be made. Big, big bucks. The number, which you should save on your phone immediately. Have you learned it yet? No. I got enough shit going on, mate, okay? To let numbers. We know they're not my forte. It's true. Still haven't done a tax, by the way.

And you can't use a till. No, I can't use a till. I can't do anything to do in numbers. It's actually making me sweat, thinking about it. Why are you pointing at the sign? Because I'm about to say, you might want to save it in your phone because it's quite long that as a name in your phone. You're never the only one.

So I was thinking, you know, you can put it in your phone like we shorten it on our scripts. Y, N, T, O-O-O-O-T-O-O-T-O-O-T-O-T-O-T-O-T-O-T-O-O-T-O-O-T-O-T-O-O-T-O-E. Okay, okay, well, whatever, , whatever, whatever, this is the number. Maybe it's the important part. Shut up, here's the important part. 07-457-402-704. That is, 07-457-402-704.

I think I do know, I could do an impression. I could do the M-N-S woman. I'm going to work on that. Damn me, I gave it away. Shit. Come on then. Email? Oh, yeah, email.

You're never the only one at g-m-com, and it's Y-O-U-R-E. Well done. Thank you. You said that so much more succinctly than I could have done. Why-O-U-R-E. And then, of course, there is good old Instagram. You can DM us. And yeah, you're okay.

Will you tell us that you're okay? So you can... Oh, it's falling apart the fucking seems. It is falling apart. Oh, dear Lord, do you lot. Okay, so you can DM us on Instagram, at our account. You're never the only one. It's about the same way.

We don't give TikTok enough love. We're bigger on TikTok than we are on Instagram. We're bigger on TikTok. We've just got over 20... over 20,000 followers on the TikTok. It's much easier to grow on TikTok, isn't it? Yeah. But still, a win is a win.

Yeah, win's a win. We'll take it. Anyway, so you can go as on TikTok still. You're never the only one. And with that, I think it's time that we give everybody the grace of getting out of their ear holes because this is painful for everybody. Indeed. Bye. Executive producers are Katie Ray and Paramee Kodikara.

Podcast operations are managed by Shell Regini, who also expertly takes care of the podcast social media, and our theme tune Everybody Makes Mistakes is written and performed by the band Hot Salad. Never the only want Never the only war on Never the only world Don't live inside a shame Because everybody makes mistakes

Oh You're never the only one You're never the only wrong You're never the only wrong Believe inside your shame Because everybody makes mistakes Oh You know,