ZM's Bree & Clint - Bree & Clint's After Party - 12th July 2024

Episode Date: July 12, 2024

We spill our most embarrassing dating stories... warning it's roughSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years in the 1970s, the Mr. Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of plague. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Clark would have threatened him. Go and kill him. If you don't, I'm going to kill you and your wife and your son. This is Mr. Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your son. This is Mr. Asia A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. The ZM Podcast Network

F-Pod F-Pod F-Pod Don't even start us. That's what I want to say to this day. Don't even start us. We've had a day. It's been start us. We've had a day. It's been a day.

We've had a day. But we're at the end of the day. Yeah, we've done it. And people don't want to tune in and listen to us win. So let's perk it up a little bit, shall we? All right, perk it up. Who has what is the most embarrassing, awkward dating story you have? Go, Ellie. Okay. One time, now it wasn't really dating but I was at a party. You might know this one.

I was at a party at university and I was talking to a guy, you know, getting men's and I felt a fart coming. And so because I didn't want the stench to stay in my underwear for the night. I know this story. Yeah, I thought you might. I decided to pull my undies away from the anus to let the air out. Just, you know, let it out, free it out. But never trust a

fart because I shat on the kitchen floor. No, you didn't. I'm not shitting you. Pardon the pun. No, I'm not kidding. And I looked at this guy and I was like, don't look at me. He's like, what? I was like, I'll just shit on the floor. He's like, what? Did you say it? Yes, because I panicked and I was like, nothing. Just don't, don't look look at me i ran to the bathroom because it was in a like boys flat in hamilton like 10 years ago they only had like two squares of toilet paper left so i had to take them that wasn't going to do anything use that to wipe the anus use the towel what couldn't even find one and then my shits are you doing it was just a little like a bird poo it was still like a and then i my friend comes in i'm was just a little like a bird poo it was like a and

then i my friend comes in i'm like bro i've just shit on the floor i'm really self-conscious about how i smell she grabs someone's roll-on deodorant rubs my ass like this is all true we were obviously drinking no this is all true no no it is she rubs on my ass i'm disgusted and then we run out i know and the only thing I could find Was the kitchen sponge So I had to use that To wipe it up And I rinsed it But I didn't throw it away

Because my brain in the moment Was like You throw it away I know But my brain in the moment Was like don't throw it away Because then it will be suspicious Oh yeah

And that's the main thing Yeah that's the main thing The whole kitchen Not you telling the guy, we've just had people come into the studio because they can't believe this story. You're a dog. I know.

I know. I know. I was like 21. I was in my uni days. And I panicked. But I still went out for the night. There's so many things in this story that you've just flown through.

I know. I know. First of all, what? No, no, it's true. I know. know i know i'm not even shitting you and the thing is like i it wasn't really a dating story but i was actually flirting with this guy and there was another guy at the party that i was keen on when when you said i've just shit on the floor he literally was like what and then i tried to lie and so then he kind of walked away kind of like shuffly i but when i came back into the kitchen to try and clean it out all the guys guys were like, Ellie, shit on the floor!

And I'm like, no, I didn't! I just farted. But they couldn't believe me, because you know how pure shit just smells real bad? It breaks. Yeah, it's like real bad. Like when you smell dog poo, like in the house, like you can automatically smell that it's there. Yeah, more than a fart.

So, were you expecting that dating story, or? I forgot that you had that story. Yeah, more than a fart. So were you expecting that dating story or? I forgot that you had that story. Yeah, I was not. Sorry. I'm coming a bit hot there. Yeah. What about you Ella? I got something but not that bad. Yeah, go. Make me feel better

about myself. Go on. So back in my uni days, had a sleepover. Oh yeah? And it was fine. Whatever. The next day, I hear the guy talking to his friend about people wearing socks in the bed. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Because he's like, is that weird?

Do you do that? I'm in earshot thinking, I left my socks on. And they're discussing, you don't wear socks in the bed. Oh, did he think it was weird? And that's something you do avidly? Yeah, and it's always just stuck with me. I love that Ellie shat on the floor and Ella wore socks during sexy times. Well, I haven't shatted.

You're the most innocent, sweet human in the world. Oh, okay, well, here's another one. Not another one. I another one i was just gonna say i took a photo of my shit once and sent it to my boyfriend did he like it did he rate it well he laughed and that day he proposed to me that's a keeper he's a keeper that's romantic he is a keeper that's nice actually you should do this with your partners and like when you're hanging out with family you can't say anything. So that's the pact. You have to promise that you can't react. And so if you're hanging out with whoever, wherever,

you show them a photo of your shit as they're in a conversation. Oh, yeah. And they have to keep going and act as if nothing happened. And it's just a game between you two. That's fun. I want to play that. I'm bringing that home. He did it with me and I was talking to his mom

and he just shows me his shit. And you have to keep going. I'm bringing that home. He did it with me and I was talking to his mum and he just shows me his shit and then I'm like. And you have to keep going. Like you can't acknowledge it. I love it. That's amazing. What a ripper. What about you, Brittany? Any embarrassing?

Oh, I think, I mean, I've told most of my embarrassing stories. Do you remember that story? And this happened to me since I was working here. This was years and years. Oh, no, maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was just before I moved here. I was in Brisbane at the time and it was a heat wave, a major heat wave in Brisbane.

It was like 40 degrees and me and some friends, we decided to go out clubbing. I was single at the time and we went out clubbing and it was like just a sauna inside the nightclubs. So it was blistering hot. So we were just like sweat. Yeah. Anyway, ended up maybe meeting up with a guy that I used to go out with.

Yeah. And we'd hit it off. He'd like had a glow up and I was like, oh, yeah, here we go. A bit of fun. Went back to his place. I was like blind drunk. Really, here we go, a bit of fun. Went back to his place. I was like blind drunk. Really? Oh, not blind drunk.

I was still coherent but I was definitely drunk. Anyway, went back to this guy's house and I was so sweaty. Like it was just swamp ass for me and I was not going to do anything until I had a shower. Yeah. And once we got back to his place, I hey can i have a shower yeah and because we knew each other was like it wasn't that awkward like i we kind of knew each other and he's like yeah that's fine he goes just go down to the main bathroom and there's towels in the bathroom

whatever yeah anyway so i've kind of stumbled into the bathroom do you not remember this story i don't know i stumbled into the bath stumbled into the bathroom and I was like, you know, got in. It was a shub. Oh, yeah. And got in there and I was washing myself. I was like, where's the shower gel? I was like, where's the shower gel? And there was only one bottle on the side of the bathtub. So I've got that, used that.

And I was like, okay, sweet. Went back out, went into the room. Instantly, within like seconds of me walking into the room, he goes, you didn't use that bottle of stuff that's on the side of the bathtub. And I said yeah, I might have. And he goes, oh that's

medication shampoo for my dog. No. And I reeked of just like this medicated shampoo. On your body or your hair? Everywhere. I washed all my bits and my pits and tits and bits. Everywhere.

That's amazing. Nice. Well, send us your stories in, guys. When did you poo on the floor? I have never shat my pants. When did you? Never. When did you have sex with a dog?

I mean, what? Anyway. All right. Have a great. Have you got a story okay go on all right film producer go on crazy all my friends know the story it's actually cooked okay i had to come in also tell you that your story was just it's gross yeah i know i know i was in a long-term relationship yeah we had like pretty much just broken up and i was like i need to get my mojo back on so we

went to town maybe we woke up this is how quick it was but we broke up on like the Tuesday and on the Friday we were like we're going out to town and I was like I'm gonna find somebody I'm gonna bring them home yeah town was like you know when you just go out and you just it's not a good night yeah we were like maybe we left at like four after uni and it was maybe like seven or eight and we were like nah not good but I was like we could we could probably take this person home yeah so i take this gal home and that same night my ex decided to come and drop off her key oh no oh no herself and oh no oh who knows the story now that she walked in and there was another oh no you poor oh my god both of you I feel bad for both of you

Nah I don't feel bad for me I feel sorry for her Yeah it sucks It sucks for both of you Yeah no you're an arsehole You're an arsehole That's my terrible And that's the only time

That I've ever had A one night sandwich What are the odds One night sandwich Love that What are the odds Oh what are the odds Well there you go

Take that into your weekend Worst dating stories We'll see you on Monday Yep Bye Okay Bye I'm coming in Well howdy pilgrims that into your weekend. Worst dating stories. We'll see you on Monday. Yep. Bye. Bye. Well, howdy pilgrims.