ZM's Bree & Clint - ZM's Bree & Clint Podcast – 12th April 2021

Episode Date: April 12, 2021

Tradie V LadyBree calls her hot brotherLA deal breakerThe Latest with Kim CrossmanHow many undies do you own?Bree’s genius ideaReal V Fake Name GameDid you find out they were your cousin?Birthday BangerKim’s acting class Ft. Mumma DiRadio BuffetThe Latest with Kim CrossmanSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello everyone and welcome to the Bree and Clint podcast. This afternoon we have Harry, Music Man, producer Anastasia and Kimberly Crossman. Very different line-up this afternoon, isn't it? A fun line-up. A fun line-up. It was a very fun show today. I had heaps of fun, apart from being very sweaty in here. Can we all agree that we're all very sweaty? Because I definitely agree with that. I'm not going to lie. I've definitely got slight swamp ass. Well, lucky you've got enough underwear to go home and have a change.

Yeah, I'll definitely need to change these. Actually, I've just had a bit of an idea. Yeah. You want to swap underwear? Not a good idea right now, Anastasia. I wouldn't want to swap with me. There's a lot of underwear chat going around. We make our own underwear.

Okay, no. See through underwear. No. Let's play a special edition of Bree String podcast edition with everyone in the room. So you've got three contestants here, three people that, you know, we're not always on the Not always on the show, but I mean, you and I are. I'm going to start with producer Anastasia.

I should know this because I room with you a lot when we're on tour. But I would say there's a I dabble in both. Oh, that makes it tough. That makes it tough. You're going to have to go from today's.

Look, knowing you, I feel like you and I are quite similar. I feel like you do appreciate a comfy brief. I'm going to look in brief. Actually, no. Actually, stop. Let me see what you're wearing first. I feel like that's fair. I can see what you're wearing.

You're just going to look for an undie line. No, I'm not. I just want to see what type of outfit. What pants are you wearing? Is it pants? Is it black pants? Oh, no. I'm changing it. G-string. Do we have a drum roll? Ibram, drum roll. You are correct. Yes!

Okay, I'm one for one. I'm going to leave Harry to last. Kim Crosby shared with us that she wears three different types. A lot of nude underwear, but she's not at work. This is technically work. Yeah. Not the same kind of work she uses. I know, but not the same.

Do you think that she rocked up? Yeah. Like, prepared for it. You never know when you're going to act. I may have to. For an acting scene. You could always need to act. You never know when a TikTok might pop up.

TikTok opportunity. I've got another idea for a TikTok actually. I can do that after. I'm going to say you're in a brief. Why? You just strike me as someone who dressed for comfort, not style. Yeah. G-strings aren't necessarily stylish i just think with the type of pants you're wearing which is a normal jean you look great

don't need to wear really wear a g-string i'm gonna say brief well done yes you're crushing it i'm crushing it that's two from two can finish it? Obviously he's wearing a G-string. Obviously a G-string. Lock it in. No. Damn it! I was so sure. I'm going to say you wear a boxer brief.

No. Wait, what's a boxer brief? Are they like shorts? What's the shorts? Like the tight shorts. Oh, the tight shorts. What if I told you I wasn't wearing any underwear? Ooh!

I'd be into it, but I've seen you. We did a lot of dancing. I feel like that'd be. No, I am wearing boxer briefs. Boxer briefs. Yes! I got it right! Three from three.

Three from three. Talk to me. Did you at any stage go through a silk novelty boxer phase? No, I never found them comfortable. I did. I think I did over top of an undie with my dickies. Yeah, with your dickies on. Now you guys have to guess mine.

Because I never get to play. You're not wearing a G-string. I am wearing bike pants today, Anastasia. Oh, free ball. Oh, my gosh. But I thought you'd never. What do we reckon, guys? Is she throwing us off the seat?

She was away for a week. I reckon rock back to work on a Monday and be a bit spicy. I reckon it's a brie string. A brie string. Love it. Nah, I'm going to look at undies. I reckon undies too. You're all wrong.

It's commando. What's that? I'm just kidding. You just said you had swamp ass.ando i'm boring i'm wearing briefs another day i am i have what color black that's actually impressive brave who is wearing no just a normal bikini brief but are they like seamless Because you don't have an underline. Yeah, they're quite good actually. I do recommend Do you want to drop the brand? Bonds. Your normal bikini black brief. Loyal to Australian brands.

I quite like all of their stuff. Quite comfortable. Well, that was fun. Well, that was good. I had fun. Did you guys have fun? I did actually. I'm worried there might be a few weirdos that catch wind we're talking about underwear chat all day on the show and just tune in to this specific episode. Well, they can pay extra. Guys, we'll take all the listeners we can get. We'll take anyone.

And if you are that person, welcome. Thanks for joining us. And tomorrow there probably will be no underwear chat. But it doesn't mean never again. Alright, I want to go home because I have quite sweaty underarms. You have totally just done a clean. I never sweat under my arms. That's a fun fact, huh?

I heard your stomach rumbled before. I think you're hungry. I am. Garlic bread tonight? I had garlic bread last night. But hey, two nights in a row. What are you going to have for dinner? I think I'm going to have a chickpea curry.

What are you guys having? A chickpea dal. Are you going to make it? Yeah, or maybe a dal. I do make a good vegetarian dal. Can I come over for dal at some point? Hey, come over any time, dal. Alright. What's everyone else having?

I've got to try and make HelloFresh, but my family can't crack 90 minutes, so it's always an endeavour. Is that making food or other activities? There's usually some wine involved, and then everyone talks about it. It's just, yeah, we just can't stay focused on the task at hand. So you're not going to be on the TV for the ads anytime soon. Do it like this family. It's you guys fighting each other. I actually did a HelloFresh ad

and I had to chop the onion. And how did that go? And they go, cut. They go, that was hilarious. Okay, can you do one but like less comedy in it this time? And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you guys see my life hack I posted over the holidays for cutting onions?

Yes, I did. Genius. I have a life hack. You should shave your knees sideways. Why? Because then you're not going against the grain. So if you're shaving your knees, you go from inside to outside. I do that for my flaps.

Free. Amazing. Are we going to have to put a – No, flaps is a body part. Hey, here's a question for you guys. Who's got a dog? Me. What do you call their privates?

I call Whitney Houston's vagina her foofa. I'm like, show me your foofa. The horses, we always call them their willies. The willies? Yeah, because they get them cleaned by the bit. Yeah, they have to because they're so big. Have you ever seen a horse's penis? Yeah It's quite large

And they get really crusty Do they? Yeah What makes them crusty? And they get infected What makes them crusty? Uncleanliness Cheese

I think you're talking about some of the horses you've been at university What makes a horse's willy crusty? Oh just you know being out in the open Exposure to the elements Not wearing briefs You know These things happen How do you cure that?

Do you reckon that's applied to females too? Oh the female horse? No, they don't wear undies when they wear bike shorts. Absolutely, absolutely. You need to cover that, you know, have some protection from the elements. You just got to. Like you're wearing bike shorts. Yeah, bike shorts, risky, but I do have a brief on underneath.

Don't wear anything. Why would you do that? You are asking for a camel toe. I've seen girls where I'm like, this is – You've seen – I've toed hard in front of you. Yeah, a camel toe. Huh? A moose knuckle for a guy.

That's what it's called. Walking down the street and something caught my eye. A growing epidemic that really implies. You know when you see a female and you're like, you've done that to yourself. Like, come on. Heaps of people are proto though. Proto?

What's a proto? What, they got the toe on show? Yeah. Well, there's girls that do like. Are there little inserts you can put down there to amplify the sort of. I don't know. Yeah, there are inserts. You can be proto. I would think that would be a of. I don't know. Yeah, there are insets. You can be proto.

I would think that would be a thing. Well, you know who would be proto? The people who are getting their bits vajazzled. That's who's proto. Because who else is getting vajazzled? What's the boy version of vajazzled? Pajazzled. Ball jazzled.

That would be like shaving a particular emblem or sports team into you. What? Vajazzled. Ball jazzled. That would be like shaving a particular emblem or sports team into you. What? Pajazzled? For a boy. Don't they do that sometimes? Oh, do they? Not here. No, I don't know if that's a thing.

Cool, cool. I think I'm close to the normal line. Just your ex-boyfriend's game. Oh, you're a Saints fan. What's it today? When the Saints come marching in. Oh, when're a Saints fan. What's it today? When the Saints come marching in. Oh, when the Saints. Play ball.

Literally. Anyone got anything else to add? Hello, everyone. Here's today's podcast. Nice, Anastasia. I was going to say thank you. Nice, take a step. This is producer Anastasia Nice Take us out This is producer Anastasia's

First podcast So if this doesn't go up At the normal time Don't blame Anastasia Don't blame me Be nice to her She's done very well today Few thanks

Thank you Music Man Harry You've been absolutely fantastic today You're welcome You're a dream to it Producer Anastasia You've been amazing Running around there Doing everything

Because producer Ben's away And mention to Intern Els Who was helping us out as well Producer Anastasia, you've been amazing running around there doing everything because producer bends away. And mention to intern Els who was helping us out as well. And Kim, always a pleasure. That's the end. Well, not the end of the podcast. Here's the start of the podcast. Yeah.

Hey, Google, what's the time? It's 3 p.m. Give or take a minute. Alexa, play ZM on iHeartRadio. Playing ZM on iHeartRadio. Playing ZM on iHeartRadio. Hey Siri, when are Bree and Clint on? Bree and Clint are on air in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. G'day New Zealand, happy Monday and no, it's not Bree and Clint this afternoon. Clint will be back on Wednesday so no one panic. He's just doing a few more dad things, you know, like buying a bum bag and wearing socks with Birkenstocks. And until he's done all those things, got them

out of his system, Kim Crossman is going to join us for the next couple of days again. I know. I'm so excited. Thank you for having me. No, you're welcome. I have a question for you before we get into today's show. Have you ever thought about how we've never really told our dogs what our names are? Have you ever thought about that? No, but that's a great question. Like, does my dog know my name? Probably not.

She probably knows you as Mum. Yeah. Well, I don't know. These are the questions that we will answer on the show today. Oh, my gosh. You know, all in-depth stuff like that. But first, let's give someone 50 bucks with Tradie V. Lady. Free and Cleanse.

Tradie versus Lady. You know the deal. And if you don't, 50 bucks up for grabs in a trivia-based quiz. It's the tradies versus the ladies. But you can play no matter who you are. We'll take anyone. 0800 DIAL ZM. Kim Crossman will be your quiz master, and we'll play next.

Bree and Clint. Bree and Clint. Tradies versus ladies. $50 on the line. All you have to do is beat out your opponent in a trivia quiz. First to three questions right. We'll take it home. Kim, you, of course, are our trivia queen.

Are you ready to go? That is my favourite way to be described, actually. Trivia queen. I saw it on your LinkedIn and I thought she likes to describe it. Self-proclaimed. Yeah, trivia queen. Queen. I saw it on your LinkedIn and I thought she likes to describe it. Self-proclaimed. Yeah. Trivia Queen. Alright, the contestants this afternoon for the Tradies. He's from Invercargill. He's

40 and his nickname is Wombat. Welcome to the ring, Troy. Yeah, g'day. How you going? Good, mate. How are you? Well, I'm getting a bit wet, so yeah. Typical South and weather, but all is good. I'm a bit nervous. Hey, Troy, I needam weather, but all is good. I'm a bit nervous. Hey, Troy, I need to know, nickname Wombat, where did that come from?

Well, it's a long story that I have to tell you about over a few beers, but it happened because I went to Australia and played a bit of rugby over there. Oh, nice. Okay. That leads me into the story, then I'll wait for those few beers. All right, Troy, you'll be taking on for the ladies. Her name is Sam. She's 29.

She's from the Waikato. She's got 60 indoor plants. Wow. Welcome, Sam. Hey, how's it going? Good. 60. That's a full-time gig.

Yeah, it takes a lot of watering. And what do people say, Sam, that have never been to your place and they come in and they see the rainforest? Can I take a guess? Do they say nice indoor-outdoor flow? Yeah, they say I'm living in a bit of a jungle. I can only imagine the mosquitoes inside. Very interesting fact. All right, guys, the rules of the game.

You need to buzz in Sam with lady if you think you know the answer. Buzz in Troy with Tradie. The first to get three questions right will take home the $50. Kim, when you're ready, first question. All right, question number one. Who starred alongside Leonardo DiCaprio in The Titanic? Lady. All right, Sam, you're in.

Kate Wins Titanic. Lady. All right, Sam, you're in. Kate Winslet. Correct. Fun fact about my holiday, guys. On Good Friday, I pulled my mattress into the lounge room, watched Titanic and drank a whole bottle of red wine. That's beautiful. It was a great time. All right, one to the ladies.

Question number two. And now this is multi-choice. Question number two. And now this is multi-choice. Question number two. Well, good luck. Yeah. Which Pixar film did Ellen DeGeneres participate in? Is it A, Finding Nemo, B, Up, or C, Cars? Lady.

Sam? A, Finding Nemo. That's an easy one. Of course it was. Followed it up with a sequel, Finding Dory. All right. She's got two. Just keep swimming.

Just keep swimming. Troy, mate, you need to stop Sam with this one, okay? Come on, mate. All right, here we go. Question number three. Question number three. Where is Billie Eilish from? Is it A, New York City, B, Atlanta, or C, Los Angeles?

I have a guess, Troy. Yes, Troy. Los Angeles? I have a guess, Troy. Yes, Troy. Los Angeles. Yes, Troy! You got one, mate. All right. Two to the ladies, one to the tradies. Question number four.

Question number four. How many keys does a classic piano have? Is it A, 107, B, 64, or C, 88? Ladies. Oh, Sam just or C, 88? Lady. Oh, Sam, just got you there. For the win. C? 88?

Yeah, I'm guessing. Correct. She's a lady. Oh, oh, oh, she's a lady. Strong the whole time. You've picked up the 50 bucks. Nice work. Awesome, thank you. Unlucky, lady. That is strong the whole time. You've picked up the 50 bucks. Nice work. Awesome.

Thank you. Unlucky, Troy. We'll see you next time, Wombat. Yep. Have a good one. Cheers. See you, mate. Sam, 50 bucks coming your way and a great game. Bree and Clint.

Kimberly Crossman has been invited back. Shocked as I am. I'm as shocked as you, mate. No, Clint will be back on Wednesday but we're very lucky to have Kim back on board this week for the next couple of days and this is why, because you said something

very bizarre to me earlier today and it was a class that you said you've been taking. Yeah, so I've been taking an erotic writing class That is so niche. I know. It's very niche like have you been are you into like are you going to write an erotic novel anytime soon like is that on the cards? Definitely not so part of my journey as an actor is I am really

uncomfortable with anything kind of sexy. I run away from it I lean into the comedy and so when the opportunity came up to take part in this class I was like that might be the most uncomfortable situation that I've ever been in that I'm surrounded by people at least two to three decades older than myself what kind of people are taking part in this class? I think I would say a lot of people probably own. Actually, I don't know if I want to know. I think most of them would own a dream catcher. That would be, I would say they're probably all in the position

or have recently had a dream catcher. Right, right. Well, you know, as your good friend, I'm all about supporting these endeavours that you're on. And I figure, you know, let's put it to the test. You've taken this class, you know, but don't test it on me, your erotic writing, because I will probably laugh.

Let's test it on someone who would probably be your audience if you were to release a book. And that person is my mum. Let's give her a call. So you're going to have to read a paragraph that you've written, okay? Let me lead you into it. It's fine. Hello?

Hi, Brianna. Aidan. Hey, did you try and call me before? Yeah, I did. Just got one thing to talk to you about. Yeah. You're at work? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm at work, but this was pretty important. This was quite important, actually. I just, see, the thing is, I just called to tell you that I love you. Oh, okay. I love you. Oh, okay. I love you too. Oh, that's nice there. National Sibling Day. That's all I just thought I'd...

Oh, is that what it is? Yeah, and I just thought I'd call you and tell you that I love you and I miss you very much. Oh, that's nice. I need a day for that, to be honest. Oh, well, I'm glad. Do you know when you're coming home? I hope I'm

coming home in a couple of weeks, but I'm going to do my absolute best. For the 25th? Yeah. I'm going to do my absolute best because that'll be mum and dad's 40th wedding anniversary. Yeah, yeah. Because I might have to look at trying

to get a couple, well, maybe another day off. Yes, yeah, even if it's one day. Yeah, well, sort of depending on what you're doing, I'll, yeah. Okay, cool. Well, I'll let you know as soon as I know. Yeah, please, because I'll put that in then. Great. All right, well, that was really nice.

I'll talk to you. I'll talk to you later. Love you. All right, see you, Brian.. Great. All right. Well, that was really nice. I'll talk to you. I'll talk to you later. Love you. All right. See you, Brian. Love you. Bye. Aw.

That was so sweet. I know that was for radio, but I feel really good about it. You should feel really good about it. Call your siblings and tell them that you love them. That's what everyone should do today. And if you don't have a sibling, tell yourself that you love yourself. Or if you have a good friend who's like, you know, the family that you choose.

Yeah, and if you don't have any friends, cry. Call us. I'll wait $100 in here. Right now. We'll talk to you. Bree and Clint. I love having you in here, Kim, because you give these little nuggets of information about what it's like to live a glitz and glam lifestyle of a struggling actress in LA.

I was wondering where that was going. I'm like, oh, she's definitely got the wrong idea here. But you do live in LA part time. You've been living here for a little bit, but you've been in LA for quite a while. And you said something really interesting to me about the dating scene in LA. Yeah. So I guess in any city, there's a few deal breakers that perhaps are really specific geographically. And in Los Angeles... Is it if you haven't had plastic surgery? Deal breaker. Deal breaker. I can see. No lip fillers? Deal breaker. Yeah. Deal breaker. No, it's actually a deal breaker is if you don't go to therapy or haven't been to therapy, people do not want to date you in Los Angeles. Really?

Wait, so if you're not paying a massive amount of money to talk to someone, then people are like, no, you're not for me. And I was like, that is ridiculous. But I investigated a little further and it kind of makes sense. I think people in LA have the mindset that if you're not taking care of your own baggage, I'm not responsible for it. So if you're not taking care of it yourself, I'm not going to even deal with that. Is people's like Tinder bios like, you know, Scorpio, 6'1", therapist name gerald coppinger or what's what

is it is that what they're doing um i don't think it's as specific as bios but yeah it's a it's a real deal breaker if people don't take accountability and are seeking help to undo i mean we're all imperfect people from imperfect parents i'm actually really on board with it i think it's me too but i'm just shocked that that's a deal breaker because I've never heard that before. You know, deal breakers for me are like if you don't have a driver's licence or a job or, you know, depending on your situation. Sure.

I'm pretty open, although I am in a relationship. So moving on. Sometimes I don't have a job, Brig. Today I do. Yeah, right. Welcome back. That's quite interesting. um yeah so it's quite interesting another big trend at the moment is that people are hiring accountability coaches so they're hiring someone and paying them a monthly subscription to basically keep on them for their working out

and their food and these what does that entail accountability coach so what are they doing trying to lose weight or something you would hire an accountability coach you would have to send them your workout for the day a screenshot of your apple watch and your food for the day and if you don't do it by a certain time in the day this company will continue to take your money but they will ghost you what so it's like having parents again pretty much you're paying for it but some people need that kind of financial i guess motivation that if they don't do something they're're still going to have to pay for it. That sounds like my worst nightmare. Like when I get an email or a phone call from a gym

that I haven't been to in like a year, I'm like, oh, my God, everyone hide. No one answer my phone. Like I just don't want to be held accountable. Well, then maybe you are ripe for the picking. For Sid, you can pay me a monthly subscription and I'll keep you on track. Look, here's the deal.

Okay. I'm going to go to therapy first and then we can talk about the other. Okay, good. Bree and Clint from iHeartRadio. This is the latest. Right, Dean McCarthy away this week on holidays. It was his birthday the other day. So we've given him some time off.

I know, he's always on a boat, shirtless. So Kim Crossman, you're bringing us The Latest this week. Shirt on. Shirt on, yeah. Yeah, so last night the Australian Dancing With The Stars kicked off and there was a huge backlash about one of the contestants. So when Chappelle Corby took the stage, the internet was divided. Basically, people were commenting, saying things like,

oh, I didn't know that being convicted drug smuggler led to being a star status. Oh, shots fired. Shots fired. And then the other people being like, she's served her time, you know, it's fine. Give her a break. Give her a break. Yeah, move on. So, yeah, Australia and today all in the media,

everyone feels really passionate about this. Oh, people feel passionate about Chappelle Corby. They always have. What are your thoughts on it? Oh. Oh, you haven't thought about it? Well, I was actually, I was like, well, what do you think? Because I, well, I think that she should be part of it

and I actually think it's quite clever from you know Dancing with the Stars because having someone controversial is amazing. Let her dance. I mean I'm not a super massive Dancing with the Stars watcher but I would watch it if she's on it I'd love to see her compete and she's already been I feel like

this is her new career path because she already did that SAS show and then now she's on Dancing With The Stars. I just hope she sings that song, Blame It On The Boogie. That would be an absolute moment in time. Well, she's still on it currently. Blame It On The Boogie. I reckon she should just do that.

I reckon we should try. I'm going to send her a DM. She might not read it, but I will. I'll do that right now. Sorry, that joke was just too good to miss. I had to do it. I had to do it. Let me just go straight out with it, Kim.

How many pairs of underwear do you own? Well, this is a difficult question for me because I have underwear that split. I like how Harry, who's doing the buttons for us today, is very uncomfortable. He's so uncomfortable. He's like, ooh, ladies talking about their underwear. Why I split my undies into three categories. Right, ooh, this is interesting. What have you got? So I've got work undies.

So when you're an actor, you have to wear nude colour jean. Do you? Can I say that? Do you actually have to wear nude colour underwear? Yes. You should. It's advised. Why?

Or they'll provide it for you often. Why? Just because with costumes and things and what you're seeing underneath it. Gotcha. So I've work undies. Then I've got me old faithfuls, which have been around a long time. Been around too long. Not skitties.

Did you say skitties? I said you skank long time. Been around too long. Not skitties. Did you say skitties? I said you're skanky underwear. Like the ones that have been, you know, worn a bit too long. When you hold them up to the light, you can semi-see through parts of them. But super comfy. And then I've got undies that someone else might see. Right. And I'd say about evenly spread across.

I would say in around the 20 mark for each category, I'd say. Can I ask as a fellow lady, so I feel like it's appropriate. So the different categories obviously work. Let's take work undies out of it. So pretty much let's go your comfies to your other underwears where you want to impress someone maybe, you know, those type of underwears. Are they different cuts? Of course.

Is one a boy leg and one a – It's a spectrum. Something someone will see are smaller than something that's comfortable. Got it. And it's a real spectrum. Right. So wait. So the ones that people will see, are they all one type?

Yes. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Well, I find this really interesting. I find people's underwear interesting. And I'm sure your listeners do too. On any given day we know if she's going to show anyone or not. So that's a good thing.

If someone ever goes out on a date with you and, well, they don't know if it's a date, a good way to find out. Also consent. How much coverage you got. Yeah, it's important. My flatmate last night let it slip because he's been packing up some of his things and he goes to me, oh, I need to, you know, pack up my underwear and do all that stuff.

And I was like, oh, well, you know, how many underwear do you have? It shouldn't take you too long. He's like, yeah, I've only got seven pairs. Only? Seven pairs of underwear, I said. And I said, what, that are clean? And he goes, no, all together. What?

Now, is this someone who doesn't always wear an underwear? Well, that's a great question. Because I know some people who don't wear an underwear. Free ball it. Even with a jean. With a jean, you say? How uncomfortable. Because sometimes the seam in jeans can be quite aggressive.

You need a barrier. And you want a pair of underwear on, you know? Seven in total. Do you think that's enough? No, that's disgusting. What if you're only doing washing once a week and then you have an accident? Well, I would say it would be more likely that they would run out

because you haven't done washing unless people are having more accidents than I'm aware of. Yeah, right. I want to ask people listening to the show, you know, what do you think is an acceptable amount of underwear to own? And I'd like people to have. A range. Yeah.

A low number, a high number. You need between. That's good. A range. And we'd also like you to have your input. Like if you think yours is the right amount or maybe you can be honest and you can say this is, I think, the acceptable amount and I'm outside of that range.

I think I'm going to come up on the high end here. Okay. Well, we'll wait. I'm going to ask how many underwear you have and I'll share. We'll do that next. 0800 dial ZM or you can text us on 9696. How many pairs of underwear do you own and what's the acceptable amount? We're discussing how many pairs of underwear is the right amount because my flatmate over the

weekend dropped the bombshell on me and said he has seven pairs of underwear. And I thought that was too little. I'm going to be honest. I think, you know, you've got to factor in things that happen in life and sometimes you may get swamp arse at work, you know, and that's where it's a sweaty situation. You don't know what the temperature's going to do. Yeah.

You personally, Kim Crossman, what do you think is the right amount? it's a sweaty situation you don't know what the temperature is going to do yeah um you personally kim crossman what do you think is the right amount i would say anywhere between 20 to 60 pairs is safe 60 pairs yeah for different occasions how many costumes yeah well hey yeah that's another that's a story for another time how many pairs of underwear do you have? Hey, that's a story for another time. How many pairs of underwear do you have? I would say around 60, I reckon. Okay. No, to be honest, I need to think about it. I probably have between 40 and 50 pairs, I'm going to say.

But let's go to the people on the phones. 0800 dials it in. What's the right amount? Let's ask Keanu. Hello. Is that how you pronounce your name? Keanu? Keanu. Keanu. Oh, well. Yeah. Sorry, Keanu. Hello. Is that how you pronounce your name? Keanu. Keanu.

Oh, well. Yeah. Sorry, Keanu. That would make sense. They've written it phonetically on the board here. Keanu. No, I've definitely heard of the name Keanu. That's pretty normal, that name.

Thanks, producer Anastasia. Nice work on that one. Keanu, totally normal name. How many pairs of underwear do you own? Fourteen. Fourteen. Okay. Is that cutting it a little close? Okay. Wait, where

are you losing your undies? I don't know. I know. I know what might be happening. Maybe in the dryer with those extra socks. All right, so 14. Better than seven, I think. More acceptable. It's better.

It's dangerous, though. You're really... Living on the edge. You are. It's crazy. You might miss washing day one week and then, boom, you're in trouble. Let's talk to Robert. G'day, Rob.

How's it going? Good, thanks. How many pairs of underwear do you have? About 60. Nice. You have 60 pairs of underwear, Rob. Yeah. You've got to have some for the special occasions and then when you're at work.

I like that, Rob. You seem like you've got your things together, stuff in order. Can I ask, what type, are they all different types or are they one particular brand? They're all jockey. Okay. And how much are we talking for a pair of jockey underwear?

About $25. Okay, so $25 times $60. You've got about $1,500 worth of underwear, Rob. Yeah, that's what my wife told me too. Nice one, Rob. Thanks for sharing. Let's go to last, Christy. G'day, mate.

Hey, how are you? Good, how are you? Yeah, good. What do you think? What are your thoughts? How many pairs of underwear do you own? They're quite a bit different. I own about six.

You have seven days in a week, Christine. I know. And we wash twice a week, so it gives you one for each day, plus a day or so to dry off, and then you've got an extra one or two up your sleeve. But that's cutting it so close. That's so dangerous. What if you had a day thing and then you have a shower

and then you have a night thing? Pass. It just works. It makes it work. What happens if you spontaneously decide you're going to go swimming in the river and then you use one pair up there and then next minute you're down a pair, you're in big trouble? Ah, dryer. I can have a dryer.

No issues. No, I like it. I like your attitude because I feel like it mimics your life attitude, which is like we're just rolling with it, which is very cool. It does make me incredibly anxious. Me too. If anyone's listening and they recognise Christy's voice, if it's her birthday coming up, buy her some underwear.

It won't be weird. She'll appreciate it. Or maybe not. She doesn't need them. There you go. I reckon what are we landing on? 20 is acceptable, I think. I would say at least, minimum.

Depending on your situation. But then these people sound cool who are just running wild. Yeah, maybe I'm going to chuck out all my underwear. Let's do it. Let's have a haul. Let's give them away. No, that's weird. We'll be back after this.

Bree and Clint. You have quite a few holidays, don't you, Kim? If we call them that. Most people refer to it as, is it the French word, unemployment perhaps? I mean, you know, same thing. I take it you have a lot of annual leave, whatever you like. I recently last week had a holiday and I was in the lovely Coromandel and beautiful spot and I feel like I've come up, even though I was on holidays, my brain's always ticking

Kim and I feel like I've come up with a really good idea. Okay. I don't know if I could sell this or if I could make it into an app. I don't know how it works, but I'm going to pitch my idea to you that I've had whilst on holiday and you tell me if it's good or not. Okay. So, um, was at the batch at the family batch and, um, me and a few other people. And there was times where all of us would go down to the beach or we would go for a walk or, you know, stuff like that that you do on holiday. And none of them like to lock the house. Everyone kind of just lives free when they're away on holiday, you know, at the beach and they all just kind of walk off and they shut the doors, but they don't

lock them. And I'm the type of person where I just lock everything. I'm always panicked about that stuff. I'm like, we need to lock up the house and um that's when i had a thought where what if you could have a playlist on spotify that would actually deter robbers from coming into the batch like horrible music that they would go oh yuck i don, gross. Is that what you mean? No, no, not exactly. I've done up a little bit of an example where, so picture this. Say you've gone out, and this could work in any situation where you just pop it on if you're not there. Okay.

Oh, right, okay. This is what you put on when you want to distract robbers from coming in. Okay. Hey, Damien, do you want a beer? All right, ask Jack if he wants a beer. Let's party. Hey, did you remember to get that bacon out of the freezer? We're going to eat that for breakfast tomorrow.

Yeah, cool. Bring it down to the lounge room. You can't walk in here all sandy. We've talked about this. You need a shower in the outdoor shower and then come in. Essentially, it sounds like there's music playing. You can't go do that to cows. But there's voices over the top of the music where people will be like,

wait, someone's here, what's going on? I mean, it sounds like I'm talking to myself, but they don't know. Yeah, you may have to get a few more people in on the recording. I can do that. Some staunch, angry voices. Yeah, that's easy. I like it. You could have a few different things on the playlist,

like a domestic dispute. Well, you know what else I thought? I thought I need to think larger, think more languages. So I've also got a Spanish option. Hola, como estas? No ingles, eh? Muchos gracias. Is that Spanish?

Por favor. Hasta pronto, amigo. Hasta luego. Muchos gastos. I mean... Hey, do you want uno, dos, tres, cuatro beers? Thank you, Mr. Worldwide. I guess I have a few questions about this now.

Is this my time to speak? Yeah, yeah, go for it. What are your thoughts? I mean, I'm an entrepreneur. I think the idea at its nucleus is genius. And what does nucleus mean? It's centre, right? In the middle, it's the conception of it is brilliant.

But. I feel like there's a but. There is a bit of a but. I think it's that you also sound really fun. Fun and young. And if I was a robber, I'd go, oh, well, she sounds welcoming. Maybe I'll go inside.

Maybe I should get Clint to voice it. Bree and Clint. What's their name? What's their name? His real name ain't Slim Shady. Real or fake name, baby? What is their real name? Don't have a name for this game yet.

I've been playing it for nearly a year, Kim Crossman. Your singing is so nice. I thought we could breeze past that this week. But all we have to do, producer Anastasia will give us names of celebrities and we have to guess whether or not it's their real name, their birth name or they made it up for a stage name. And we will be playing for people. Actually, we'll have a person on our team.

That's how this game works. Let's go to Camille first. Hi, Camille. Hiya. Whose team do you want to be on this afternoon? I think I'm going to be Team Kim. Sorry, Brie. That's all right, Camille.

Thanks, Camille. I've done it since then. I come here every day. Anyway, Lana, that means you get me. That's cool. That's who I was going to pick anyway. Excellent. Thank you, Lana.

I appreciate that. Lana, that's not what you told me off here. Hey! Hey! We got this, Camille. All right. Producer Anastasia, tell us the rules. So basically, you guys will just have to reach a decision within your team,

and then you've got to tell me whether it's real or fake. Kim started last week, so Bree, you're going to have celebrity number one. All right, Lana, are you ready? This is us. The first celebrity is Bradley Cooper. Lana, do you know anything about Bradley Cooper? Sounds pretty generic to me. Yeah, I think it's his real name.

Do you reckon? Yeah. You wouldn't pick Bradley otherwise, would you? True, yeah. Stink. Like, for example, Brad Pitt's name isn't Bradley Pitt, it's Brad Pitt. Okay. All right, Lana, are you happy?

Let's lock in his real name. Yeah. All right, lock it in. That's correct. Yeah. Nice, Lana. One step closer to those 50 KFC chicken dollars. All right, come in, Camille.

In your face, Camille. No, I'm just kidding. Don't worry, Camille. Whoa, whoa. Hey, it's a bit early for that. We haven't had Camille play yet. We celebrated whoa. Hey, it's too early for that. We haven't had Camille play yet. Celebrated too early.

All right, so celebrity number two for coming Camille is Jennifer Lawrence. Ooh. Camille, any thoughts? It feels like a real name. It sounds like a name. But I'm going to go. I reckon fake, don't you? She's private.

You know what? She is really private. She also feels like someone who maybe wouldn't have thought ahead for the level of fame that she got. I mean, when she was in Winter's Bone, I don't think she thought that that was going to be massive. But you know what? No, no, no, no.

Let's go real. Let's go real. Maybe. No, I don't want to talk you out of it. I was thinking let's just go bold. Let's try fake. No, I don't want to talk you out of it. I was thinking let's just go bold. Let's try fake. Oh, I feel the pressure is on. I don't know.

Now we do because she's in your face, Camille. Maybe her real name is Katniss. We don't know. No, you pick, Camille. I support you on either one. So we're locking in fake? What do you want, Camille? Let's lock in real.

Okay, lock in real. All right. You guys are correct.? It's locking real. Okay, all right. You guys are correct. That's a real name. Now you're a dream. Oh, Camille, you're good. She is. All right, Brianna. All right, Lana, our turn.

Celebrity number three is Ashton Kutcher. Ashton Kutcher. Lana, my... Oh. No, I don't know. I don't think it's real, eh? You don't think it's real? You think it's real. Kutcher. Would you really go, I'm going to. I don't think it's real, eh? You don't think it's real? You think it's real.

Kutcher. Would you really go, I'm going to name myself Kutcher? See, should you apply the Bradley Cooper rule to every celebrity now? What do you mean? What was the Bradley Cooper rule? That he wouldn't pick his name to be Bradley. Mmm. Lana.

Yeah, I think it's fake. I honestly think it's fake. All right, I'm going to need an answer, guys. Oh, Lana, I really think it might be real, but I'll go with you. Okay, well, if you think it's real, you probably deal with celebrities more than I do. I wish, mate, but I feel like we're probably on the same level. I'm going to go with you.

You think it's fake. Oh. All right, well, Lockie and fake. That is correct. Nice think it's fake. Oh. All right, we're locking in fake. That is correct. Nice, Lana! Yes! His real name is Christopher and Ashton is his middle name. He, like all celebrities when he was at a young age,

he wanted the cooler name. Right. See, Lana, it's all about trust in our relationship and I feel like we're doing well. You weren't trusting each other. I did, I just trusted her. I said, I'm going back in you in, Lana. All right, well done. All right, Kim.

Well done. All right, so we're sitting at 2-1. Now, Kim and Camille, your celebrity is Lady Gaga. Oh, what the hell? This is rigged. Yeah, it is rigged. That's fine, Camille. We're going to take it.

I mean, knowing her name is Stephanie, we're going to go with Lady Gaga. Well, Camille, let me consult with my teammate. Yeah, that's a given. Can't help but feel we are being robbed, Lana. Do I even need to answer? Obviously, that's fake. Her real name is Stephanie Joanne Angelina Giamonotta. Yep, and she is Italiano.

She is Italiano. All right, come on, let's get this show on the road. What's our last one? Sorry, this is a real one. All right, and when we go to tiebreak, because it's two all. Oh, that's right. It's a team buzzer, so someone needs to go Bree or Kim first. Lana and Camille, you can also buzz in.

If you think you know, yell out your name, okay? Celebrity number five is Chappelle Corby. Brie, quit! Lana. You haven't got it right yet. I'm pretty sure Chappelle Corby is her real name. It is her real name. Lock it in.

Real name. Brie and Lana, you guys have just won the celebrity name game. Emil, I'm so sorry. We tried. We fought hard. She was quick off the mark. Oh, Lady Gaga wasn't fighting. All right, Lana.

Lana. Hey, that's why you're my partner. That fighting spirit 50K. I see chicken dollars coming your way. Awesome. Thanks. Thanks, guys. No worries.

Lady Gaga. I'm running out of celebrities. Bree and Clint. I feel like you might have a bit to add on this next story, but we'll see. I heard Fletchford and Megan actually talking about how they're all getting DNA kits done at the moment. Great.

Which you've had a DNA kit done, haven't you? Yeah, I did. It was awesome. There's a few different companies you can use. I used one called 23andMe that do a medical DNA on you as well. And it says specific things like. Prone to wind. No.

That's what I got on mine. Did it? It got like that I'm most likely to have wet air wax. True. To be a light sleeper. Also true. And various other things. I feel like this could also be like astrology.

You're like, that is me. That is so me. That describes me. But this story, I mean, isn't the best ad for DNA kits. Okay. Because a woman has shared her story online after all she really wanted was to get this DNA test done and see where her heritage was from and, you know, maybe reconnect with some relatives from overseas.

Who knows? But that's what she really wanted for her birthday. And her lovely boyfriend, I don't know how he did it, but he ended up getting her a DNA test done. And the results weren't the best. Let's just say that. When the results came back, turns out her and her boyfriend actually cousins. Happy birthday.

Give me a kiss. Well, and then what do you do? What do you do with that information? That's a really tough one. Like you've got your cousins and then you've got your first cousin and then your second cousin no but what would you do what would you do in that situation I mean if I love I mean you've been there before like tell us what happened I mean yeah I mean because your family all knows each other you know what I mean

I mean let's ask producer Anastasia what she would do in this situation. Producer Anastasia, what would you do if this happened to you? Oh, have we got her mic? Yep. There we go. What would you do? Yeah. Just hypothetically.

Hypothetically? I'd run for the hills. Would you? Yeah. Yeah. Why are you asking me? I don't know. Just'd run for the hills. Would you? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, why are you asking me? I don't know. Just when you mentioned before that you accidentally kissed your cousin. But you said the cousin that you... Was it dated or kissed?

Of course it is now. If you found out you were related to someone that you'd hooked up with, 0800 dial ZM. You handled that flawlessly. Text us 269. Text us. Could just call us. Just call us. Yeah, no, but in all seriousness, it was not a blood-related cousin,

was it? No, I don't know what you're talking about. Can someone just play us off? Okay, this was all hypothetical. None of it was true. Hey, this is a safe space. It's a safe space here and we want to ask you this afternoon on 0800-DIALS-IT-M, did you find out that you were related?

You know, maybe it's not by blood, but we just want your stories. And maybe, you know, you can share with us this afternoon what you would do or what you did in that situation. Oh, 800 dial ZM or you can text us on 9696. Bree and Clint. We're talking about times you didn't realise that certain people that you were related to and it's an awkward situation. And a girl it's happened to has spoken out on the internet

where she really wanted to do a DNA test for her birthday present. So her boyfriend, being the kind soul that he is, got that for her and turns out they're cousins. Happy birthday. Not the best birthday present, but what would you do in that situation? And we've asked you to share this afternoon on 0800DIALZM, has this happened to you or someone you know? Sam, hello. Hi.

Has this happened to you or someone you know? Someone I know. Okay, what went down, Sam? So they kind of knew and they just didn't want to... Yeah, hold on. Hold on, hold on, hold on, Sam. So they kind of knew? Yeah, they kind of knew, but they didn't... I don't know whether they didn't know,

didn't want to believe it or not. Sam? Yeah, they found want to believe it or not. Sam. Yeah, they found out that they are definitely related. So, Sam, when we say related, are we saying, you know, first cousins, second cousins, third, distant, distant cousins? A lot closer. Niece and uncle. And we'll leave it there.

Thank you, Sam. Appreciate you calling through. Definitely lock it in, related. Yeah, I think that. And that's a hard one not to realise that you were related. Well, she did say they kind of knew. No, they definitely knew. They knew, yeah. Anyway, a few texts coming through on this.

Someone said, not quite the same thing, but a girl added my brother on Facebook and he messaged her and said, hey, cutie, do I know you? She wrote back, no, but we are cousins. Oh, my gosh. Hilarious. Yeah, there's another one here as well. I found out Tinder date was a cousin because he said his dad had the same

last name as me. I looked it up and I found out we've heard cousins. We have that person on the phone. Are you kidding me? Victoria, hello. Hello. Tell us what happened, Victoria. So I went on this Tinder date with this guy who has his mum's last name.

Okay. He goes, oh, you just got the same last name as me. And it's not common last name, but there's like three different bloodlines with the same last name as me. And it's not a common last name, but there's like three different bloodlines with the same last name in New Zealand. So it's risky, but it's not impossible. No, but my granddad made a family tree book for a family reunion a few years ago. Got it. And I was like, oh, look it up.

Turns out we're third cousins. Right. And did you have a follow-up date? Oh, no way. Third cousin, though. That's pretty. I mean, pardon you. Kim, desperate crossman, is our third cousin, though.

Victoria's like, do you want to go on a date with him? What are you doing? Thanks for calling, Victoria. Let's go to Tony. Hello, Tony. Hello, how are you? Good, thanks. Has this happened to you or someone you know?

I went to school with someone, actually, to be honest. Okay, so what happened, Tony? She ended up together with her first cousin. They were together for probably 15 years. Okay, so not a fling. Not a fling. They even had kids. They never got married because they already had the same last name. Their fathers

were brothers. And we'll leave it there. Appreciate you calling through, Tony. I mean, saves money. Smaller wedding party. Saves money on the wedding. No need to do it.

You know, got the same last name. That's how it works. Anyway, time for birthday banger. I love how confident Tony was too. She's like, and they didn't have to get married. They had the same last name. Which is the only reason people get married anyways. Saves time. Bree and Clint. Hey. the same last one. Which is the only reason people get married anyways. Saves time. Brie and Clint.

It's my birthday. Brie and Clint's Birthday Banger. Alright. We do this at the same time every day. It's called Birthday Banger. We get three of you on and we figure out what was the number one song top of the charts on your 16th. And then we play our favourite one and we can all

reminisce. It's Kim Crossman's favourite segment. Yes, I love it. I'm so glad you said that because it's also my favourite. And let's welcome our first caller, Amber. G'day. Hi, guys. How are you? Good, mate.

How are you? I'm good. Tell us your birthday, Amber. 10th of July, 1993. Right. You were 16 in 2009 on the 10th of July, 1993. Right, you were 16 in 2009 on the 10th of July. And

Amber, here's your birthday banger. Better cascade her. Evacuate the dance. Not happy, Amber? Not the best. You don't remember that? Remember that? I do, I do, but not my favourite song.

Sweaty, maybe at a house party. Nope, just me. Well, let's see what else we get. Let's go to Grace. G'day, Grace. Hi, Amber. Are you there, Grace? Do you hear me?

Oh, now we got you. Grace, tell me your birthday. The 3rd of October, 1994. All right, mate. You were 16 in 2010 on the 3rd of October. And back in 2010, this had a number one hit. I feel like every girl listening has belted that on a night out. What do you think, Grace? Definitely.

I agree. Kim, what are your thoughts so far? I reckon I can get up and dance to both of these gems. Both are bangers. Yeah. But let's finish it off with Michelle. G'day, Michelle. Hello.

How are you? I'm good, thank you. That's good. Michelle, what's your birthday? 21st of July, 1983. All right. You were 16 in 1999 on the 21st of July. And back in the late 90s, this had a number one hit.

If you had my love and I gave you all my trust, would you come for me? Tell me, baby. With a J-Lo, If You Had My Love. What do you think, Michelle? Yeah, I think it was pretty good at the time. Pretty big banger. What would you pick if you had Yeah, I think it was pretty good at the time. Pretty big banger. What would you pick if you had the choice out of the three?

I'd have to go for my birthday. Yep, fair enough. Got to back in your own birthday banger. It's time to vote, Kimberly Crossman. I mean, I feel upset that Amber wasn't super jazzed about hers. I'm super jazzed about that one. I'm super jazzed about that too. I'm super jazzed about that too. Cascader, are you kidding me?

Cascader is a vibe. It is a moment in time. I think it's also, for me anyway, entry-level dance kind of genre. I feel like I was definitely underage at a bar somewhere. I definitely was underage at a bar somewhere. Got sweat curls, you know, in my hair. I used to take my shoes off.

Like, Kimberly, put your shoes on. You will get a staph infection at this bar. Put your shoes on. So I reckon I'm real jazzed about Evacuate the Dance Floor. These memories are locking it in. It's Evacuate the Dance Floor, Cascader Amber. Let's change your mind. Come on.

Picture us dancing. Give it a chance. I'll warm up to it. All right, girls. Let's get out on the floor. I like to move it. Come and give me some more. Watch me get physical, out of control.

There's people watching me. I never miss a beat Still the night, kill the lights Feel it under your skin Don't try, keep it tight Cause it's pulling you in Spit up, you can't stop Cause it feels like an overdose This ain't over yet

You're blind, you're in the dance floor I'm affected by the sound Outro Music I'm affected by the sound I found this weight is killing me Heated to freezing But it makes my bones numb My body's aching System overload Temperature's rising I'm about to explode Watch me, I'm intoxicated

Digging the show It's got me hypnotized Everybody step aside steal the night, kill the lights feel it under your skin that's right, keep it tight cause it's pulling you in bed up, you can't stop

cause it feels like an overdose feels like an overdose evacuate the dance floor I'm affected by the sound We'll be right back. Thank you. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. I was cascading. I was making way of the dance floor. You're on ZM. Oh, my God.

Because I'm here and I'm so excited, we're going to do an absolute what? Hey, hey, hey, wait, wait. What are you doing? I'm going to do back-to-back cascading. Hey, hey, wait, wait, wait. You have to let me. You feel like you can waltz in here. Your name's not even on the show.

I know. And you're asking for double plays. Yeah, but this is what the people want. Give me one good reason why I should let you play back-to-back. A worm on the floor. Huh? I'll do the worm on the floor. Let's play it.

I want to see that. Every time we touch, Kaskada, I love this song. I still hear your voice when you sleep next to me. I still feel your touch in my dreams. Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why. Without you, it's hard to survive. Cause every time we touch, I get this feeling. And every time we kiss, I swear I could fly.

Can't you feel my heart beat fast? I want this to last. Need you by my side. Cause every time we touch, I feel the static. And every time we kiss, I reach for the sky. Can't you hear my heartbeat? So I can't let you go. Want you in my life. ស្រូវនប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ប់ Your arms are my castle Your heart is my sky

They wipe away tears that I cry The good and the bad times We've been through them all You make me right when I fall Cause every time we touch I get this feeling And every time we kiss I swear I can fly Can't you feel my heart beat fast? I want this to last. Need you by my side. Cause every time we touch, I feel the static. And every time we kiss, I reach for the sky. Can't you hear my heart beat so? I can can't let you go Want you in my life There it is, back-to-back Cascader, every time we touch it.

It feels like I coughed up a lung. Like, back-to-back birthday banger. It does. You know what that song reminds me of? Lynx Africa, Gum and Sweat. Yes. Lynx. Oh, so good.

Yep. Absolute bangers. There you go. That's birthday banger. We do it every day at the same time. Brie and Clint. Kimberly Crossman back in for the next couple of days. Clint having a few more days off and there's one thing I love about having you here filling in

Kim. Just one thing. Just one. This is the main thing. The main thing. You do and say some really weird stuff and one of the weird things that you said to me earlier today before we started the show was that recently you've taken a class which doesn't sound weird but it was the type of class that you've been taking. Yes. Now tell the people. Don't be shy. I've been taking part in an erotic writing

class. Now, I'm not going to laugh. We're going to take this seriously. Why? Well, um... Are you releasing an erotic novel? Coming soon. Hey, I'd buy it. I'd buy it. No. So as an actor, one of the things I find really difficult

is I get really uncomfortable when I have to be, even I can't say it, like sexy, even now. I just kind of stare away from it. It makes me so uncomfortable. Not me. I love to be sexy. And you are very sexy. I always use humour, which is something you do as well.

That's what I do. I mask because it makes me uncomfortable. So I thought that this would be the most uncomfortable situation I could be in with people, you know, two to three decades older than me talking about their crazy wild fantasies. Sounds very uncomfortable to me. And, you know, but I'm your friend and I love to support you and what you're doing.

And I thought a good way to support you was for you to put this to the test, see if the class has worked, put you in a situation where you can get some feedback, not from me, because, I mean, what do I know about, you know, that kind of thing. Your target demo is someone more like my mum. Oh. Let's give her a call and you can test some of your material you've done in your erotic writing class.

This is not what you told me I was going to do. She doesn't know what's happening. And we won't tell her. We'll tell her the bare minimum. Rana, how are you going, beautiful girl? Good, mum. I'm very good. Kim Crossman's filling in again.

I'm back. I am my favourite actress of all time. My goodness, thank you. No, no, that's a different Kim, Mum. Different Kim. Not Kim Basinger. Basinger. Basinger.

How do you say it? Basinger. She's a singer, Brianna, not an actress. I'll take a compliment, Mum. Mum, an actress. I thought she was a singer. I'll take a compliment, Mum. Mum, hey, we wanted to call you because very important actually. Kim has been taking a writing class recently and I thought you have recently gotten into in the last however long reading books

and you do love to read a novel. So I thought Kim has written something and we're going to test her writing skill that she's learned in this class on you. So all she's going to do is read out a paragraph that she has written personally and then you need to give her some feedback, okay? Okay, I reckon I can do that. This seems appropriate. When you're ready, Mum, listen carefully. I always feel nervous before a trip. My hands are wet.

The air feels crisp and sharp on my burning skin. The echo of my breath drowned out the murder of my guests, the murmur of my guests. The pungent aroma of cinnamon blurs my vision as he parked his rocket in my space station. I took flight. Mum, this is serious. What kind of rocket is that?

Mum, she's quite sensitive about her writing, so just listen, Kim. Okay, sorry. That's all I had so far. Oh, I think your descriptions are just wonderful, but your mind kind of loses concentration after you go, the cinnamon and the rocket sort of thing. Why, where did your mind go to, Mum?

Oh, look, Brianna, I've had a few rockets in my time. And that's where we'll leave it. Thank you very much, Mum. Always a pleasure. You're never coming on the show again. There you have it. Hey, that wasn't from Fifty Shades. No, bring her mic down.

That's enough. She's had too many wines. Thanks for that, Kim. Thanks. Thank you. Meant to be a stitch up on you and now I'm permanently damaged. Brian Clint. Kim, I thought we could do

a bit of a radio mash up and then you've given it the name The Radio Buffet. And will it stick? We'll wait and find out. I've unbuttoned my pants so I'm ready. Great. Which is where we're just going to talk about a few different things and hopefully something takes your fancy. The first thing I'd like to discuss is you came to the table today with an interesting thought about cards. Yeah, so we've had a few birthdays and anniversaries

recently and I realised that my mother spends an extraordinary amount of time picking the right card based on the words printed in said card and writes to the person from Jill. No, Jill. But she would really spend a lot of time for someone else's words and I'm like, that's insanity. I buy usually a blank card or that just says happy birthday and fill it with my own words.

I didn't realise that there are people. No, it's all about your own words. But maybe it isn't. Maybe Jill doesn't like the people she's buying cards for. That's all I'm saying. Mum? Or she's a busy lady. Oh, you're getting those cards.

That's awkward for you, isn't it? No, but there was time spent. What, buying the cards? Time is a currency. Picking specific words and covers and maybe it's a generational thing. Whatever you want to tell yourself. But you and I are the same. We buy the card to write our own words in the card.

Yes. I'd love to hear from people on 9696. Do you buy the card for people's written words or are you writing? Try not to sound so sceptical when you're offering that up for people. I mean, I think both ways are great. Okay, cool. We've ticked that off. Something else I'd like to tick off in the radio buffet is I heard

a very interesting piece of audio from the internet the other day and it was about the order in which you should make tea. Take a listen. There's a British scientist that says the secret to the perfect brew is to add milk before the boiling water. They say it gives your tea the superior flavour and it counteracts the hard water. What?

Disgusting. Foul. I would break up with someone and then I would go over to their family's house and I would probably fart in their living room. There you go. That's how much that offends me. I feel equally offended. It's tea bag, hot water, milk.

Absolutely. But this sparks the other order that apparently is controversial. You're laughing about farting in someone's living room, aren't you? I kind of blacked out for a second and then I came to and I was like, whoa, that really got to me. And I talked about going to a stranger's living room and

farting in their living room. Anyway, what were you saying? Well, okay, if you're going out for a night and you have these three things to complete, getting changed, doing your hair and doing your makeup, which order do you do them in? Oh, this is good. So getting changed, doing my hair, doing my makeup. Which order do you do them in?

I get changed. Oh, is that not the right thing? Keep going. And then I do my hair? Makeup. You reverse. Why? What are you doing?

What insane planet do you live on? You come out of the shower, you do your makeup, then your hair, and then you get changed. No, no, no. Yes, you do. Why would you put your clothes on before you leave? Because if you're doing your makeup first, then I get sweaty doing my hair.

What are you doing to your hair? Oh, lots of things. That is for another different Radio Buffet. We will discuss that. Okay. Topic number three. Topic number three, the last one, and we'll get to this really quickly. I read this fact online and it was talking about how there is one animal

and one animal only that can breathe with their butt. Did you know that? Turtle. How did you know that? Is that really? Yes. Yeah, that just came to me. And that's where the phrase turtle poking comes from.

I'm just kidding. There it was, the radio buffet. Bree and Clint from iHeartRadio. This is the latest. Clint back on Wednesday and Dean McCarthy also off today. So, Kim, you are stepping in. Who's available? Kim Crossman's available.

Now, you've been doing a great job and what news do you have for us here? Yeah, so Travis Barker, the Blink-182 drummer, debuted some new ink, actually, just on above his pick. Some more tattoos. I thought his whole body was already covered. Well, yeah, this one's interesting, though. He got the name Kourtney tattooed above his boob in celebration of his relationship with Kourtney Kardashian.

Yes, because they were rumoured to be dating and then they've been dating for a while now. There's a lot of news floating out there about them. Yeah, so this is, I mean, it feels pretty permanent. So he's got Kourt Courtney above his boob. And now here's my thoughts on it. As someone who has three tattoos on my body. You've got three, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

You have three tattoos for people. No, I have five tattoos. Three of them are for people. Wait, same person or all different? Not different people. Wouldn't you have learnt after the first one or maybe the second one? But no, you had to go the trilogy. Here's the thing.

They're white tattoos and so they do not last. So they're slightly non-committal from the beginning. And they're not names. Well, that's not a good sign from the start, is red flag i'm so committed but is she is she though it's a white tattoo and here's what i say and these and two of them are not uh relationship tattoos they're actually friendship tattoos wait and the friendship ended yeah oh see you know what i always say on this show people say do it for relationship like but friendships fine fine or sisters and stuff are fine. True.

Don't get a tattoo for someone else. That would be my advice. Yeah, because I always say on this show, you're setting yourself up for disaster if you get a relationship tattoo. Like, you get, it's cursed. You ask anyone and we'll probably see that. I mean, you know, the Kardashians,

when I think of lasting relationships, they have a great track record. So it probably won't happen with Travis Barker and Kourtney, but we will see. There you go. Learned something and mainly that Kim Crossman has multiple regretful tattoos. Bree and Clint.

There it is. The end of the show for another Monday. Kim Crossman. Do you love how I use your full name? I do love it, actually. You do? Does it make you feel like, you know, like a star? No, but I know you're definitely talking to me.

There's no confusion. No confusion. Not at all. Clint, back on Wednesday. Kim, we'll be back in tomorrow. We will be. Lucky me, eh? You thought you were done and dusted, but we've dragged be back in tomorrow. Will be. Lucky me, hey. You thought you were done and dusted,

but we've dragged you back for another couple of days and I'm so glad we did. What was your favourite part of the show today? I would say it definitely wasn't reading out erotic fiction to your mother. I thought that was a great idea and I really, if you missed it, I push people to go listen to the podcast. It's on all available platforms, including iHeartRadio. I hope that my teacher from my erotic writing class actually heard it

and I could get... Special credit. Yeah, maybe. What's the teacher look like in your erotic writing class? Picture the female teacher in her 60s. I was going to say, I'm not picturing her naked. Why are you making me do this? Just picture her.

60s, yep. You've got it. Got it. Sexy teacher. Yeah. Frizzy hair, should have a glass of something. Glasses? Does she have glasses?

Yes. Could have a cigarette in one hand. A cardigan that's peeled a little bit. Oh, costume jewellery. Not sure if there's a peeled cardigan. Not to say it's not in the wardrobe, though. How many more classes do you have? Four.

Well, good luck. I can't wait to hear about the erotic painting class that you take next after that. Do you reckon there's a class that exists where you paint someone's naked body? Maybe I'll start that up. There is that. Is there?

What are you talking about? No, you don't paint. You actually physically paint their naked body? Maybe I'll start that up. There is that. Is there? What are you talking about? No, you don't paint. You actually physically paint their naked body. Oh. Is there a class for that? Put some wine in there and that is a home run entrepreneurial business.

Sign me up. Hey, maybe we can go into business together. Yeah. You can paint me. We'll chat about that off air but right now we'll see you tomorrow.