ZM's Bree & Clint - ZM's Bree & Clint Podcast – 14th June 2021

Episode Date: June 14, 2021

Post Covid lifestylesWhat’s your tattoos origin story?Clint was on TinderMind Blow Mondays!Birthday Banger!Inspired & UnemployedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, welcome to the Berean Clint Podcast. G'day everyone. G'day everyone. Today on the show, you're going to hear about it, but I've been doing some tindering and I think I'm pretty good. I think I'm good at the tinders. I think if someone put me in charge of their tinder, I would turn up some goods for them. You'll find out.

You talking about tinder, I've never thought to myself, God, you sound old, but you sounded old. Well, yeah. I'm out of touch with the Tinder. You're definitely out of touch with that part of life. Yeah, yeah.

Which you should be. Let's hope you are. No, I should be. Let's hope you are. Red flag, mate, if I'm like, oh, if I get on your Tinder and I'm like,

swipe, swipe, swipe, zing, zing, zing, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, if I get on your Tinder and I'm not answering that question you're both very different we'd find you different people eh ok actually you know what oh yeah yeah there's that but I think that Clint is probably how I'm how I would currently operate my dating apps whereas

Bree I would probably go for you because you will chuck some spice in there and like push, I'm not very good at pushing myself out there. Yeah. I'm a safe pair of hands on your hinge. You're more of a rogue operator. Which hasn't worked for her so far. You're more of a rip shit and bust.

Well, no offence, but I'm just saying, but you also don't want it to work. You're young, you don't want to find a serious relationship. I know that it is successful for people who like knuckle down, talk to people, want to find a serious relationship. I know that it is successful for people who knuckle down, talk to people, go to heaps of dates. Put in lots of time and effort. Yeah.

To be honest. To set up the spreadsheets. I went on hardly any dates from dating apps. Oh, brag about it. My sister made a great guy. Oh, happily in a relationship here. One and done. That was the opposite of a brag.

Oh, brag about it. I hardly went on any dates. Oh, yeah, yeah. Do you pay for any of your apps? No. A friend of mine sent me a porn account that she uses the other day. Sent me her logins. Is she paying for a porn account? Yeah.

Wait, what? I'm not going to say. No, don't say ho. No, but so it's actually really cool. Is this a woman's one? Yes. Oh my god. Everyone's talking about that. No but So it's So it's actually really cool It's like a Is this the woman's one? Yes Oh my god

Everyone's talking about that Because I think it's a great idea And it's a very inclusive Kind of Content made for females That isn't degrading And isn't You know

All the stuff that Let's be real Porn kind of is Oh yeah It's for men Yeah it's for Oh so I And it's made

for women but to be honest i hope that's the way that industry goes where it you know um what's it called um hold on it's got a weird it's like italian or something right my friend was talking about the other weekend hold on i'm just asking for a friend i will tell you what it is. It's called Bellessa. Yeah. B-E-L-L-E-S-A. Right. And do you have to pay for it? I think so. Oh, you have to pay for it.

I'm pretty sure it's a paid subscription. People are real scared, I imagine, to sign up to paid porn apps because you don't want it to ever come out that you've been paying for a porn app, eh? You don't want your credit card history to come out. I mean, if it's a tasteful one like this one, then I don't, to be honest, I'm not one of those people. I'm not ashamed. Like, obviously, I'm not someone who watches it a lot,

but I have watched it in the past. It's pretty normal. But you know what I'm saying? If you're applying for a mortgage and the bank goes, what was this transaction to BigMilks.com? That's why you pick one like Balessia or Balessa, which obviously you wouldn't be able to tell what that is. That's an Italian restaurant in Cairo.

You could say, yeah, that's a new collagen powder from the foothills of Venice. And they're like, wow, you go through a tub a month? And you're like, yeah, look at this skin. That Balessa, Balessa, whatever, that you could make anything. There are some other ones That you couldn't be like That's my new vibrator

Oh this is a This is a This hub is a A mall How many people do you think We're sending to Bellisa Right now Probably quite a few

A lot of girls are talking About it at the moment Is it an app Or an app and a website I think it's a website But I think it's a Safe like Space for women

And men And men to be honest For men as well Hopefully space for women and men, to be honest. For men as well. Hopefully for men. Not all men want to watch real predatory shit on their porn. Everyone wants to go steps into it, stuck in the dryer. A lot of people feel weird and awkward about it because of that reason. Because that's all they have, that image.

It's not very nice. I'm in that position. So I think it's really cool. I think it's an awesome thing and a great movement in that kind of industry to go that way. Yeah. We were having a chat about OnlyFans on the weekend, me and some friends.

Oh, my God. Someone messaged me about doing stuff on OnlyFans the other day. It was an email. Someone emailed me. Yeah. It's becoming more We think you could be A top influencer

And I was like Oh no Did you know Do they want you to be on OnlyFans Or do they want you to get people To use OnlyFans I don't know I think it was

I'd have to check It's becoming more and more normal But like You've still got to do it Right You've still got to I could never In a million years

I mean I could post pictures Of my feet But no one post pictures of my feet, but no one wants to see my feet. Well, no, people do want to see your feet. There's the thing. No, trust me. Once they saw my feet, they wouldn't want to see my feet. But do enough people who want to see your feet,

does it warrant doing it? Because then you're a foot-packed person and you're like, oh, I made $200. There's that friend of ours that does actual, yeah, she actually has an account and posts regularly. For feet? Yeah. Just for feet? Just for feet. Buzzy. Yeah. On OnlyFans. Do they have nice feet?

They've got amazing feet. Yeah, right. It works for them. They go and get pedicures and stuff like they make content around it too. And you know what? Those pedicures, tax deductible because it's a business expense. Oh yeah, true. The Uber to the pedicure place.

What's the biggest stretch that you've claimed something on tax where you've been like, oh, this could be in this category? You know, in Australia, and maybe this is wrong, so maybe someone will call me out for this, but I'm pretty sure. So in Australia, if you're a radio broadcaster like you and I and say you take a trip so say i took a trip to wherever say we were in brisbane and i flew to sydney for a trip yeah and i come back the next week and then i tell a story about that trip on the radio becomes

tax deductible a certain a certain amount of that trip is tax deductible yeah and that's just that is the same here right but if you ever get audited they'll want to see like yeah they'll be like if you so if you say 20 of that trip was to gather the story they'll go okay prove it show me you didn't do anything else for the radio we can't do that for in terms of radio stuff can we um oh no because you don't you're not a contractor to the radio Exactly No it's my day job Let's not give out I don't want to give out Tax advice

I mean I don't know If it's correct To be honest I'm the last person And I feel like Clint You're not the best person either You know Actually you know

Way more than me I ask you for advice I pay an accountant Because I'm too scared Of how tax operates I don't ever want to be On the wrong side Of that ledger

Shout out to my accountant Pay the accountant And I say to the accountant Just make me pay Whatever I need to pay And I don't care How much my accountant Char wrong side of that ledger. Shout out to my accountant. And I say to the accountant, just make me pay whatever I need to pay. And I don't care how much my accountant charges me. Just make sure we're safe. Actually, if my accountant is listening, I do care how much,

and I appreciate you keeping it the same. If you want OnlyFans advice, though, or porn subscription. Ben is your man. Well, no, you're our man. It's you. You're the one with the login. No, I'm not OnlyFans. Oh, right. I'm not on OnlyFans Oh right I'm not on OnlyFans

And to be honest I haven't used it She just gave it to me Sure Because we were talking about it Sure Don't you porn shame me Don't you porn shame me

Google's Bellissima On their work laptop Yeah Odd someone Alright Who wants to play Well I'm on a home laptop But on the work wifi

I can give it a wifi Go on you google it Bellessa Can you not get it on ours I don't reckon it'll open Do you reckon I'll open it How do you spell it I can just say it was an Italian restaurant B-E-L-L-E-S-S-A

Oh it's free Free porn videos for her Bellessa porn for woman I don't think it's free They're HD and erotic. Huge text. Good tagline.

Should I click on it? Nah. Nah, don't. Not at work. Trust me. Why would you ask?

Hey guys, shut up. Don't click on it. Trust me. You're going down a hole you don't want to go down. There's always a

one. It's one of those games like there's someone watching you know like test it alright well go on click on it no wait

go on click on it I dare you nah go on I dare you go on I'm not doing it go on I'm not

oh don't be don't be so party pooper no I don't go on go on wait no we're not leaving until she does it

Come on I'm not going to You can do it No I'm scared Anti-climax so to speak And more ways of one Hey Google What's the time?

It's 3pm give or take a minute Alexa play ZM on iHeartRadio Playing ZM on iHeartRadio. Playing ZM on iHeartRadio. Hey Siri, when are Brie and Clint on? Brie and Clint are on air in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Good morning everybody, welcome to the show, it's Brie and Clint. G'day guys, happy Monday. You know what sucks about this week?

What? It's a full week. Oh God. It was last week, four days. Well, it's not a full week if you take a day off. That's a full week. Oh, God. It was last week. Four days. Well, it's not a full week if you take a day off. That's a very good point. Shuck on having a sick day. I don't think I've got any sick day.

Oh, no. Well, we can't say that we're going to take a sick day and then pretend to be sick. You can say you're starting to feel a bit off at the moment. That's a good way to plant the seed. Yeah, that's a good... I feel a bit iffy in the stomach, actually. Hey, I'm sure there's hard-working people

who have been at work since nine o'clock this morning are keen to hear us planning to chuck a sickie at three in the afternoon. Yeah, why not? People need to support each other. Today on the show, your chance at 20 grand if you can open the box. Another clue today,

although it's not really a clue, is it? It's a clue that there's a clue coming soon. It's a clue about the clue that there's a clue that's coming soon. Yeah, it says, the game is rather hard, so I offer you a boon. You are searching for a secret word. It is coming soon. Has anyone tried boon? That's a weird word to put in the sentence.

That is a weird word. B-O-O-N? Could that be the word? What is it? What's the numbers for it? Don't know. We'll check them out. We're going to do a guess at 4 o'clock.

If you want to have a go at that 20 grand. I'm probably going to put that word in before 4 o'clock, though. Boone? Yeah, just for my own. I'm playing the game on my own now. All right, we'll eliminate Boone. And if it is the word, we'll really strongly encourage you to use that word at 4 o'clock. We'll start with 50 bucks cash.

Thanks to KFC, though, with Tradiverse Lady. If you would like to win that, you can call us now. If you haven't heard it before, it's just a bit of trivia. If you think you can beat someone else, then give us a call now. 0800-DIAL-ZM. We'll do that next. Bree and Clint, ZM. Bree and Clint.

Lady. Bree and Clint. Tradie vs. Lady. All right, the Tradies vs. the Ladies. The Ladies still way out in front on 51. The tradies sitting at 36 for the year. Can they pick up one here this afternoon? Let's meet our lady.

She's from Queenstown. She's 43 and she's a barrister or a barista. You're a barrister or a barista. Which one is it? Amber? What do you want me to be? Oh, I like that. Give us options.

If you're a barista, I'm less keen to give you $50 cash because I assume you've got enough money. If you're a barista, I'd like to tip you $50 cash. Okay, go. I do love a barista. Yeah. Quite creative baristas, I think. Our barista today will be taking on our tradie, who's also a lady.

She's 28 years old and she left teaching studies to become a timber joiner. Welcome to the show, Kayla. Hi, guys. Kayla, when did you make that decision? About three years ago. How far into the degree were you? I had probably half a year left. No way, Kayla.

Change up. Okay, here we go. Amber, your buzzer is lady. No way, Kayla. Big change up. Okay, here we go. Amber, your buzzer is lady. Kayla, your buzzer is tradie. First to three correct answers wins $50 cash. Thanks to KFC. Good luck. Here we go.

Question number one. A house plant went viral over the weekend for selling on Trade Me for a whopping $10. Lady. Oh. Lady. Amber, you haven't even heard the question. I think it's a monster. I'll finish the question.

No, no, good to get in there, Amber. For a whopping $27,000 plus, what is the plant that is the unofficial national emblem of New Zealand? Oh, come on. Ladies. Amber. Come on, Amber. Tautokawa.

Come on, guys. It's onukawa. Come on, guys. It's on the All Blacks jersey. It's on the... Tradies. It's on the All Blacks flag. Kayla. Silver Fern. It is a Silver Fern.

I was about to say, it's on the Silver Ferns jersey. Shit. Oh, sorry. Okay, one point to the Tradies. Here we go. Question number two. Finish this TV show title. It's Always Sunny in...

It's Always Sunny in... It's Always Sunny in... No. The answer is Philadelphia. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Very popular show. I was going to say the dark. I just want to give you a point for that.

All right, still one to the trade is question number three. Over the weekend, Novak Djokovic gifted a young tennis fan his racket in the crowd. The video has since gone viral. Name one other current tennis player. Ladies. Yes. Amber. Rafael Nadal. Ladies. Yes. Amber.

Rafael Nadal. That is correct. We will give you that. It's one apiece. Question number four. Who sings this song? Don't show up. Don't come out.

Don't start caring about me. Come on, you two. Oh, my God. I'm so bad at this. Trady. Oh, Trady, yes. Kayla. Is it Dua Lipa?

It is Dua Lipa. Oh, my daughter's going to kill me. Right, two to the tradies, one to the ladies. Question number five. The shortest day of the year is next Monday. Is the name for that day Winter Solstice, Winter Sol Cycle or Cinco de Mayo? Ladies, Cinco de Mayo. I wish it was Cinco de Mayo next Monday, but it's not.

Kayla, do you want to guess for the win? What was it? The other two options are Winter Solstice or Winter Sol Cycle. Winter soul... site? How do you say it? I'm not going to give that to anyone. It's winter soul cycle.

All right, this point is for the win. All right, here we go. Question number six. Name one of the teams in the Super Rugby final this weekend. Ladies. Amber. Canterbury Crusaders.

Oh, my God. No, Crusaders. Oh, my God. No, they lost. Oh, my God. Kayla, for the win, name one. Blues. Yeah, well done. The Blues is right. That was a real Monday game, everybody.

A real Monday. Can we find Amber some KFC chicken dollars, please? She was a bloody good time. And, Kayla, you did very well. The 50 bucks coming your way. Love you guys. Well done. See you, team.

I got an article which was talking about, I really like to reflect these days. I think it's as I've gotten older. You should start journaling. No, I don't know if I'm good at that. It's the ultimate reflection. Is it? It forces you to write down stuff

that's happened to you and then you can go and look at it. I say this as a non-journaler. It's extra work. And then I always see in movies or TV shows. Someone reads your journal? Someone reads the journal or they get what's named framed because of their journal. I don't know. The journal's just never... If I journaled

it would be the first three days would be there and then there'd be a gap of about six months and then there'd be another entry and go, sorry, I haven't journal. The journal's just never- If I journaled, it would be the first three days would be there, and then there'd be a gap of about six months, and then there'd be another entry and go, sorry, I haven't journaled for a while. Sorry, I've been too long. Yeah. And then that'd be the end of the journal.

Very long in between journaling. And when I die, my kids would find it and go, man, Dad didn't do much. But this is a study that's been done, and it's a good reflection on what people and Kiwis are like now after, you know, obviously all the lockdowns and the really bad stages of COVID. Are we the same, aren't we? And how it's changed people quite a lot.

What's different? Well, the first one is it talks about who's leading the way with financial caution. So who's looking after their money a little bit more, being a bit more, you know, cautious about their saving and stuff? Yeah. What generations do you think that would be? Millennials.

Millennials are one. Yeah. Gen Y. Yeah. So we are leading the way in terms of financial caution, whereas Gen X, not so much. Yeah, well, they're still at uni, so. Yeah.

Oh, no, not Gen X. No, they're the old ones. No, that's above us. Apparently Gen X. Millennials are being cautious because there's no jobs around. That's the problem. Has everybody halved the workforce when COVID happened? And so all these people graduating with these degrees and they're like, what am I going to do?

So, yeah, I understand that one. One of the other things that the study revealed is that over a third are exercising outdoors more than they were a year ago. Oh, yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. That's a great statistic. Yeah, let's see how long it lasts.

That's so good. 51% of New Zealanders are optimistic about travelling overseas in the next year. Oh, yeah. So over half the population. To Australia or Vanuatu. Still counts. Yeah, yeah.

Still counts. Over a third of New Zealanders are saving more money than what they used to. Oh, yeah. Which is great. Yeah. Well, good or bad. Eight out of 10 Kiwis are making do with the food they have in the cupboard.

Yeah, okay. Instead of going and buying everything. No, no, no. There's a reason for that. You know why it is? Why? Because everybody stockpiled in lockdown and now they've got 15 jars of peanut butter, 45 jars of canned

tomatoes, more coconut milk than they know what to do with. And so they have to, they have to make room in their pantry. So they're just eating the pantry. You know, that's the one thing I would stockpile. Like if there was an actual apocalypse, I'd be like canned tomatoes and pasta. And you're good to go. And rice. Rice is a good one too. Over a third are reading more online news and watching more TV and listening to more radio than they were a year ago. Well, as people who work at a radio and newspaper company, can we say thank you very much?

Great statistic. Probably my favourite. Bree and Clint from iHeartRadio. This is the latest live from LA with Dee McCarthy. Coming to us live from country Queensland, not quite Los Angeles today, Dean McCarthy, with details on a Friends cruise. Yes, well, hi there. G'day, g'day.

Okay, so here's the deal, right? I've been in the country for a minute, so I've transformed. But I have some very exciting news for Friends fans. It's going to send them into a Friends frenzy. Basically, they are going to do a Friends celebrity cruise line cruise. So it's happening next year, right? And it's leaving from Fort Lauderdale.

And there's this big cruise liner. It's called the Equinox Celebrity Boat. You know those fabulous big cruise ships. They're like 10 stories high with swimming pools. It's one of those. But it's a Friends-themed cruise. There's going to be Friends dress-up parties. Come as your best friend's character.

There will be trivia night, games, all these kinds of things. But unfortunately, I can confirm there will be none of the cast on there because can you imagine what Jennifer Anderson would charge to go on a cruise with a 2,000 fans? She'd never do it. She'd never do it. There's nowhere to happen. There's nowhere to escape.

No. If she gets mobbed, she's stuck on a boat with these crazy Friends fans for what? Seven days? Nine days? That cruise sounds like hell on earth to me. And also, are we going on cruise ships after COVID? Are we going back onto cruise ships? Well, they were definitely not the place to be when COVID started to hit and a lot of people got stuck.

They got stuck on them with COVID. Yeah. Yeah. In cruise ships. Look, I don't think that that is for me. I'm a massive Friends fan, but I'm going to pass on that one. There's something in it, though. They'll start doing themed ones.

They can do a Seinfeld cruise. They can do a Big Bang Theory cruise. Just don't do a Titanic themed cruise. Oh, too far, mate. Whatever you do, just don't do. Too soon. Don't do Titanic. Don't do Battleship.

Don't do. Kate Winslet nearly lost her life on that boat. That's the latest on ZM Bree and Clint. Bree and Clint. But speaking of money, there's been a graph release that shows how much money you need to earn

to be able to afford to buy just the average house in your area. Why do you always bring these stories up? Yeah. Because you own a house. Yeah.

You don't have these worries or someone's calling you. It's probably your mortgage broker looking at your next rental property that you're going to add to your portfolio. Not now, man. I'm on the radio. As someone who doesn't own a house and probably believes I will never be able to afford a house now, I don't want to know.

Why do I bring it up? I want to know. Well, good point. Is it good news? Is it good news? There is some good news. Yeah, there's some good news. That means a lot.

Let me go through the data, okay? Let me go through the data. Okay? Let me go through the data. Okay, all right. You tell me. For all you prospective first home buyers out there who are out shopping for houses, this information is based on a 4% interest rate, a 20% deposit, and a 30-year mortgage.

So like the lowest you can do, the base, base, base. So to be able to afford a house in, let's begin at the bottom. Let's go to Southland. To be able to afford a house in Southland, the bottom Let's go to Southland To be able to afford a house in Southland You need to be earning $60,000 Okay Realistic

Achievable right Let's go to the west coast of the South Island As we know you always start with the lowest No not true So it's only going to get higher Let's go to the west coast of the South Island Home of Gloria Vale Okay

Grey Mouth Hoke Digger Yeah you can afford a house there If you earn $41,000 a year. Okay, that's good. Let's jump over to Christchurch in Canterbury. How good is Christchurch in Canterbury? To afford a house there, you need to be earning $85,000 a year. I told you this isn't good news.

Let's go to Otago, Dunedin, home of the Highlanders. Go the Highlanders this weekend in the Super Rugby final. To buy a house there, you need to be earning $110,000. Where was that? That's in Otago. $110,000. Let's go to Wellington where there is a notorious housing shortage currently and a land shortage to buy a house in Otago.

Currently, based on a 4% interest rate, 20% deposit and a 30-year mortgage, you need to be earning $131,000. That's for Wellington. Yeah. Oh, let's bring it down a bit. Let's get cheaper. Let's go to the Waikato, Hamilton. You need to be earning $110,000 a year.

In Hamilton? To be able to afford a house, yes. It's $110,000. $110,000. It's a great place. I know it's a great place. Oh God. And Auckland. Tamaki Makoto. The city of

sales to afford a house. I've got the details here actually. Your first born child. Or $171,000. Get out of here Clint. You and your big ivory tower bringing these stories in. Yeah.

That's craziness. You better call us and show them all that money that's in the box, yeah? I think it's going to be easier for my firstborn child. Bree and Clint. If you're not following Britney Spears on Instagram, you should. Yeah. Because she actually does a lot of posting on her Instagram. Oh, yeah.

She put up that red fridge. Yes. That was good. She does fashion shows of posting on her Instagram. Oh, yeah. She put up that red fridge. Yes. That was good. She does fashion shows when she gets new clothes. There's a whole podcast which talks about what they believe she's actually trying to say through her Instagram posts. The secret messages in there. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's quite interesting. Do you believe that there are secret messages in the posts? Maybe not all of them. Maybe some of them. Okay. I don't know But recently she has put up a picture of herself in a hot pink leotard Where she's revealed a tattoo that is on the very top of her neck Just below her hairline

Did we know of any tattoos that Brittany had before this one? It says here in this that she's known to have a number of small tattoos on different parts of her body, including an image of a dice on her wrist, a triangle on her right hand, and a fairy inked on her lower back. Got it. Okay, so it's not the first tattoo that we're hearing about. No. No, good.

No, no, no. Anyway, she says on the pose, hot pink makes my tan pop. Have you seen the tattoo on the back of my neck before? It's Hebrew. It's a language written backwards. It says mem, hey, shin and means healing. It's my favourite tattoo but ironically you never see it. Who knew she was Jewish?

I didn't. I don't think she is, is she? Oh, I don't know. She's getting Hebrew tattoos tattooed on her. Yeah, but then a lot of people get Chinese writing on them too. Are those people not Chinese? I don't think so. Wait.

I'm pretty sure some of them aren't. Wait a second. I know. How do they know what it says then? Yeah. Didn't David Beckham get Chinese lettering? He's definitely got Chinese symbols. And didn't it say the wrong thing?

Like, didn't he get something written on there? I feel like this is everyone's, like, you're asking for it. Especially if you're a tattoo artist of Chinese descent and some person comes in. Have some fun with it. Yeah, and they've got no respect for the culture or no knowledge of what they're getting. And they go, hey, man, I want you to write infinity in Chinese language on my arm.

And you're like, cool, Cantonese or Mandarin? And they're like, what? And you're like, don't worry about it, man. I'll take care of it. And then you just write ball bag on their forearm in Chinese lettering. I'm sure it happens a lot. Anyway, so there you go. There's a tattoo that we didn't know Britney Spears had.

What does it mean, sorry? Her one? It's in Hebrew, but it means healing. Healing. Yeah. Okay. So maybe, you know, I don't know why she got that or the story behind it.

Do you think it actually says healing? Or she said to the tattoo artist afterwards, she said, how does it look? And he said, good, it's healing. And she's taken that as going, oh, great. Now I've got a tattoo that says healing. He's like, no, it says, you know what, don't worry. It's fine.

That's what it says. It's on the back of your neck. You're not going to see it. It's healing. Don't worry about it. It's healing. I want to ask people this afternoon, do they have a really weird tattoo origin story?

Yeah. Like a real weird reason they got a tattoo or a really weird story behind the time they got a tattoo. But I mean, most of my tattoos are off a whim. What's the origin? You've got that New South Wales Waratah and you're from Queensland.

So why did you get that tattoo? What's the origin of that one? I'm not even acknowledging this shit joke anymore. That's what it is. It is a crap joke. And when you got the Taylor Swift 13 tattooed on there, which album was it from, I'm not acknowledging. Which album was it from? I'm not acknowledging. You can't even ask me about it because you don't even have any tattoos.

Because you know what Clint said to me? Not that you've seen. Clint said to me, he goes, you know why I don't have any tattoos? And I said, why not? And he goes, you don't put bumper stickers on a Ferrari. And I said, jeez. And I think that's some of the best advice I've doled out. And I said, you drive an Audi.

What are you talking about? No bummer stickers on that either. What's the origin story of your tattoo? Yeah, do you have a weird one? Is there a weird reason behind your tattoo? You can call us 0800-DIAL-ZM or text us on 9696. What's the really weird origin story of your tattoo? I've got a friend of mine and she became friends with one of my other friends

and I was like, okay, you know when that happens, you're like, that's a bit strange and you see them hanging out together and all that kind of stuff. Especially when they cut you out of the loop. Yeah. You're like, you guys only know each other because of me. I got a bit cut out of the loop and I was a bit butthurt over it and they were super close for this short period of time. Yeah. And I remember watching on social media

that this one weekend they were having an absolute bender and they got these matching tattoos. You should have been invited to get that tattoo. I know. They already know each other because of you. I know. Anyway, they got these matching tattoos. You should have been invited to get that tattoo. I know. They already know each other because of you. I know. Anyway, they got these matching tattoos and now I think they both regret it massively. You should go and get the same tattoo and just show them

and be like, hey guys, I got our tattoo. You know what the tattoo is? What? So it's a bird cage with birds flying out of the cage but then the tattooist forgot to put a door on the cage. Oh, right. So it's just birds with an open cage. That's not a cage.

No, there's no open. It's got no door. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, so how'd the birds get out? Exactly. Oh, right. Well, maybe don't get that tattoo.

We'll talk to Niamh. Hi, Niamh. Hi, Niamh. Hi. Is this the Prime Minister's daughter that we're speaking to? I hope not, if she's tattooed. I was going to say, I don't think she's got any tattoos yet, or if she has, she hasn't told Jacinda.

What's the tattoo that you got, Niamh, that's got a weird origin story? So a couple of weekends ago, it was really rainy in Christchurch and my dad was down to visit, and we couldn't come up with a rainy day activity, and so he suggested we went and got matching tattoos. So we got matching capybara tattoos, because he looks a bit like a capybara. You and your dad got matching tattoos? Your dad sounds awesome.

That is so cool. And wait, just to check, a capybara is that weird-looking hamster thing, right? It's the world's largest rodent, yes. And your dad looks like the world's largest rodent? Oh, that's a bit mean. No, so he just looks a little bit like a capybara. Right, right, yes. And your dad looks like the world's largest rodent. Oh, that's a bit mean. No, so he just looks a little bit like a capybara. Right, right, right. They're quite cute, but they do look like a giant rat.

Cute. You've got a dead capybara tattoo. I love that story, Niamh. You're not going to regret that. Yeah. No, because people say, what did you get a tattoo of? And I say, I got a tattoo of my dad. And they say, what?

And then I lift up my, like, my legging. And I'm like, thanks. It's a capybara. Yeah. I really like it. That's good.bab bar. Yeah. I really like it. That's good. Jaden's here. Hi, Jaden.

Hi, Jaden. Hey, guys. How's it going? Good, thanks. Can you top that? How did you get a tattoo? What's the origin story? So my family, for Christmas, we do the old secret sander where we put the name out of the hat.

Yeah. And I got my stepdad, who pretty much has everything. So I thought, you know, it would be funny, I got his nickname tattooed on my shoulder. What's the nickname, Jaden? His nickname is Teabag. You got Teabag. Did you get a teabag or did you write teabag?

I got a teabag, but the one that goes in the cup. The one that goes in the cup. Oh, thank God. Okay. I mean, still, you got teabagged on your shoulder. You got teabagged for your stepdad's secret Santa. Is that correct? Jaden, I applaud that gift.

I applaud that. It's very good. It was hilarious until Boxing Day, and then I was like, I can't return that. Yeah, no, you can't return that. And he can't keep it either, so. No, he can't. It'd be a bit weird if he did.

God, it's going to be hard to figure out a better Christmas present for next year, isn't it? Hope you don't draw him again. Yeah, how do you top it? I'd love to get Jaden for Secret Santa. Get a face tattoo for him, Jaden. Big weekend, big weekend for me over the weekend. Bree, I got back on Tinder.

Did you? Yeah. Does your wife know? Have you told her? No, I haven't told her that I was back on Tinder. That's probably a bit wrong, isn't it? I was on Bumble as well, actually, over the weekend. What's your favourite?

I feel like Tinder people are looking just for a bit of fun and Bumble people are a bit more serious about a relationship. That's my interpretation from being back on it over the weekend. And you've got to understand, I haven't been on Tinder since. Ever. I was on it very briefly in 2013 when it first came out. And then I met my wife. You got banned and then you weren't allowed back on until now.

Yeah, I got suspended. What did you get suspended for? Too many DPs? Too hot. Too many DPs. Too many matches. Too many offensive photographs. Not true.

And look, I was on Tinder over the weekend. I was on my friend's Tinder. We went to the rugby and afterwards we went to a bar and he's single, my friend Paul, and he was actually Tindering at the game. And I was like, come on, man, put the Tinder away. No, that's pretty normal to Tinder at a game because you would know if you were actually in the world of dating

that it's a good opportunity because there's a lot of people within your radius that will pop up on your phone and you know that they've got a common interest because if they're at the rugby, then you might have that common interest. Do you close your radius down to like one kilometre kind of thing? You can if you want to. See, I should know that because I was on the dating apps. A few observations from me and this is helpful for anyone who's out there on the dating apps.

Here's an outsider's perspective. Stop calling it the dating apps. Okay. Those are people who are out there on the apps. Is that what I call it? Just say Tinder. Or Bumble though. It's Bumble as well.

I was bumbling. I mean, people know what you mean. I'm right about Tinder versus Bumble, right? The Bumble is they're looking for a relationship and the Tinder is looking for a, you know, a little bit of... No, I think that's Grindr Bumble is they're looking for a relationship and the Tinder is looking for a little bit of that. No, I think that's Grindr is the one you're looking for. Were you on that too? No, not on Grindr, no.

Did you jump onto Grindr? No, my friend Paul is looking for a female. So there's nothing for him on Grindr. Just for yourself, did you jump on Grindr? He'd go great on Grindr though. God, he'd be a hit if he was on there. This took me a long time to get my head around. Left is yes

and right is no is that it? is it left to say yes and right is no? no I'm pretty sure left is no left is no

right is yes whatever it is figure that out first is my first bit of advice don't swipe up because I did that accidentally because I thought that meant look at more of their profile

do you know what up is? super like so I ended up super liking these people that accidentally because I thought that meant look at more of their profile. Do you know what up is? Super like. So I ended up super liking these people that my friend Paul actually had no interest in. Now you've used all of Paul's super likes. And then I used his super like, yeah. And then what else was interesting about my time on Tinder?

How was your chat? Did you chat to anyone? So the chat bit is the main bit, right? That's the thing. I cringe at the thought of you chatting up women. Like, I just, I can't picture it. Well, I said to Paul, I said, get me out of this swiping game, man. There's too much.

There's too much. I want to get into it. It's a bloody meat market out here. Did you say, I want to get into a more serious relationship with someone you've been chatting to? Oh, yeah. I said, let me loose on the combos

because, look, mate, I talk for a living. Let me loose in there. Pretty good. I reckon I went pretty good in there. Here's the problem. You know the only people that say,

I think I went pretty good? Who? It's the people who are out of touch. No. No, I reckon we're pretty good. It was late at night.

No one was responding. Okay, what was one of your pieces of banter? see, this is my thing. This is my thing and this is my observation.

Not appropriate for the radio. No, no, it's not that. I think there's too much pressure on the chat. And everyone's like, oh, I've got to come in with a hot one-liner. Got to open the chat with a bit of banter. Please tell me. There's so much pressure. Did you open, was one of your opening lines, hi?

Or hey? Yeah, I was like, hey, so-and-so, how's it going? Swipe left. No? Swipe left. No. Swipe left. No. Left. Boring.

Bree and Clint. What's their name? What's their name? His real name ain't some shady real or fake name, baby. What is their real name? All right, the real or fake name game. Producer Anastasia gives us the name of the celebrity. You have to decide if it's their real given birth name Name game. Producer Anastasia gives us the name of the celebrity.

You have to decide if it's their real given birth name or a name they've given themselves. We play as teams with you guys. Artika is here first. Would you like to be on Team Bree or Team Clint, Artika? Team Bree. All right. Jump on the Bree train. Keegan, that means you and I are working together, okay?

KFC chicken. It's fine. I did want Team Bree, but that's fine. Oh, Keegan, there's no need to say it after, okay? KFC chicken. It's fine. I did want team Brie, but that's fine. Oh, Keegan. There's no need to say it after you've already lost out on Brie, all right? No, she's just not successful, you know? Yeah. Artika, do you want to come on team Clint?

I'm happy to give Keegan to Brie. No, thank you. Oh. Savage. Nah, it's a kill point. We'll win this. All right, Keegan. I hope we lose, man.

Let's go Anastasia What's going on? So basically You guys I'll give you a real Or fake Celebrity name

And you guys have Five seconds With your teammate To decide whether or not It's real or fake Who would like to start today? I'll give you the choice Clint can start

Awesome Are you excited Keegan? Are we going to win this Clint? Yeah we're going to win this Keegan Awesome Yeah, we're going to win this, Keegan. Awesome. All right. Let's do it. The first celebrity is Sher Lloyd.

Sher Lloyd. Fake. No, I know that's fake. Yeah, it's fake. We know it's fake. That's a real name. No, it's not. It's real.

Keegan. No, it's fake. It's fake. You should have gone on Brie's team. That's her real name. It's real. What? Yeah, I know.

She was born to be famous. Keegan, are you sure? Alright, Brian and Artika, let's do it. Okay, come on Artika, let's do this thing. Celebrity number two is Emily Blunt. Emily Blunt. Artika, what do you think? I think real. I think real too. I think it's a real name.

Her family invented the umbrella. Okay. That's correct, girls. Well done. Got one on the brushing it. Keegan, this is as much on you as it's on me, okay? Alright? It's 50-50 work right here.

Alright, Keegan. Show Bree she missed out on an excellent teammate. Celebrity number three is Becky Hill. Oh yeah. On lots of songs. Who? On the Nitsky song. Fake. Fake.

No, that's a real name, guys. It's a real name. I don't even know who she is. Yeah, it's fake. She's a fake person. It's a real name. We don't know who it is. It's definitely a real name.

All right, boys, you're not doing too well. It's fake, isn't it? Wait, what's the answer? It's a real name. It's a real name. Oh, Keegan. That means Artiega. Who is she?

If we get this one right, we win. All right, girls. The fourth celebrity is Marilyn Monroe. Real. What? Real Artiega? Yeah, real. All right, lock it in, real.

I don't know about that, though. Unfortunately, that's fake. Her name it in real. I don't know about that, though. Unfortunately, that's fake. Her name's Norma Jean, isn't it? Yeah, it sure is. The Elton John song. Goodbye, Norma Jean. That's exactly what it was.

She just changed it when she became famous, essentially. All right, now let's go to tie break. Oh, no, actually. No, they have to get this one to stay in it. Okay, okay, you guys have to get this one to stay in. All right. What do we win? 50 KFC chicken dollars, Keegan. All right, Keegan.

I need that. I'm not going to pay you until tomorrow. Good, Keegan. Come on, mate. Celebrity number three is, sorry, five is George Michael. Oh. He's the singer, right? He's the singer.

He's real. Real? Okay, Keegan's confident. It's real. The singer, eh? He's the singer. He's real. Real? Okay, Keegan's confident. It's real. The radio, real? Real. If they get it wrong, Artika, that means you and I win. Yes.

I'm hungry. It's real. Come on, Keegan's hungry. Michael's real name is Georgios Karagos. Yay! Okay, that was good. Keegan, you're bloody hilarious Artika, 50 KFC chicken dollars coming your way Yes, thank you

Bree and Clint said it Bree and Clint It has happened again This keeps happening A new record sale price for a pot plant on Trade Me was achieved last night Yeah, it's the new type of hit thing on the block for marijuana, isn't it? No, this is not marijuana. Marijuana, arguably...

It's not even a marijuana plant. Arguably marijuana more useful than this. What do you mean, arguably? Well, the people who are buying this variegated minima, which sold last night for a stupid amount of money, are hoping they can do cuttings and then they grow it and they sell it on.

So it's a business. Yeah, so they're looking at investing in a business plant. It's the most expensive. It's not a business plan. It's a business plant. Yeah. Money doesn't grow on trees. Grows on variegated minimas.

Last night, one with nine leaves sold for $27,100. I mean, shout out to my community, the Indoor Plants NZ group. We're a tight community. And I saw them going crazy about this on that page over the last couple of days. Yes. $27,000. Well, they're all excited because they're all hoping they're sitting on a $27,000. Some of them will be whipping up a variegated minima in there.

They'll be doing a variegated something. Why though? Why so expensive? Even if you can do cuttings from it, why? Because of the colouring. Because it's half white, half green. And it's a mutation. Look, I know it's confusing,

but I also know that you've gone from being someone who got quite angry about these sales to someone who's now part of the New Zealand indoor pot plant community on Facebook. No, I love the community. It's a great page to follow. I learn a lot of things, but I've found that a lot of people on this page

and this community agree with me and think that that is crazy money. It is crazy money. And it's stupid. We, this afternoon, want to encourage your indoor pot plant habit, Brie. And that's why we've got something for you. Have you got me a variegated minima? No, we've got you a standard orchid.

Oh, no. That we purchased from the florist. So what you're receiving here is a healthy flowering orchid. It currently has one, two, three, four, five flowers on it and one, two, three, four, five buds that are about to flower on it. I love an orchid. Yes. It's one of my favourite flowers.

Yes. Do you know how many of these I've killed? All of them? A lot. Yeah. I even looked after one one time for my friend when she went away for two weeks. Two weeks.

Killed it. So this is your challenge, Bray. They're so hard to keep alive. Four weeks. Your challenge is to keep this orchid alive for four weeks. And if you can, Ross Boss has said that he will send you and one ZM listener on a $500 indoor plant shopping spree.

No. You can buy pots. You can buy soils. You can buy gloves. You can buy flowers. You can buy philodendrons. You can buy monsteras. You can buy ficuses.

You can buy rubber trees. Whatever you want to buy. So I get to like reward someone. Yes. And take them and they can spend whatever they want. Yes. You guys get to go shopping together. But this orchid must be alive and in as good condition as it currently is.

What's technically alive? The flowers are still on it. What if it drops them? We'll know if it's alive. Okay, you'll be able to tell. So we know that the orchid is not being changed out for a fresh one, like parents do with dead goldfish. The orchid is going to live here in the ZM Studios.

Oh, that's rough. It gets sunlight. It gets a constant temperature, okay? And all you've got to do is keep it alive. So if you would like to partake in the $500 shopping spree with Bree, all you've got to do is text us right now with your best advice for how to keep an orchid alive. I feel like, you know, this is my opportunity

to show my community at Indoor Plants New Zealand. Yeah, that you're worthy. I'm worthy and I'm meant to be in this group. I don't think I will succeed but I will give it a go. No, and neither do I. We haven't bothered finding the $500 yet. Bree and Clint. All right, guys.

It's time for Mind Blown Mondays. On Mind Blown Mondays we attempt to blow your mind first of all and then you try to blow our mind. It's not an easy thing

to do, right? Because you have to kind of line up a coincidence that hits at the exact right time and makes us feel like whoa!

Because if it's not quite right and it's not quite there, the feeling, the euphoric emotion isn't there, you'll get the fart. It's such a brutal fart too. It's a very, like it's vicious. It's vicious. You have time to sit in that fart and think about what you've done. I would call that a violent fart. Now you're going to go first?

Yeah, this is crazy because we struggle to find these stories for this segment and I open up and I'm doing my work this morning and I'm looking for stuff and I was like, oh my god, this is the perfect Mind Blown Monday. So it's not a personal story, right? No, it's not a personal story. So I will feel better if I need to give you the fart.

Okay. Okay? But I think it's good. Okay, good. I think it might be worthy. I want it to blow my mind. And I've got audio. Okay, you've done your research.

To go with it today. So I'll give you a bit of background. So the story is about a woman who she has gone thrifting. So she's gone to, you know, like- Op shopping. Op shopping. And she's gone to go buy some bedside tables for her room. Yes.

So let's pick up the story here. She explains what happened. I bought these nightstands for $12.99 each at Goodwill today, okay? And I go through the drawers and I find this little crumbled up paper. It legit says Carly's home number and mom's cell phone number. It has my mom's cell phone number and our home phone number from like 15 years ago. Like, what?

My youngest sister's name is Carly, and that's our home phone number. We have not had a home phone probably like 10 to 15 years. What are the chances of that? I go thrifting, and I end up with nightstands owned by one of my little sister's friends. Oh, no, wrong one, wrong one, wrong one. No, that was an accident.

So to break it down... What are the chances? If you didn't really follow, she went out to, you know, op shop and she bought these bedside tables. Inside the drawer was a crumpled up piece of paper with her sister's name and her mum's mobile number. From when she was a kid. From when she was a kid. From when she was a kid and their own home phone number.

So like one of her sister's friends owned those bedside tables. And their numbers were in it. And had written down her best friend's home phone number and mum's phone number and stored them in the back of the dresser. Come on. And there was nothing else left in the dresser except that one thing. And then that girl just happened to buy them and happened to find them. What are the odds?

See, that's where the limit is. It makes you go, whoa. And I found this story today on a mind-blown Monday. Yeah. Don't push it. Oh, okay. Oh, $800 at M. Do you want the chance to blow our minds?

Do you have a coincidence that's happened in your life which just you can't work out you can't put it down to anything other than it's just too mind blowing yeah

how coincidental it is give it a go we want you to win we want you to we want you to we want you to get the explosion we do

and we want to hear your stories as well so 0800 dials at M but people don't always get the green light from us, all right? But it's all done with love. And like we said, we want you to succeed. So call now 0800DIALZM. It's a Mind Blown Monday.

Where you have the chance to blow our mind with a story, a coincidence that's happened in your life. But be careful, because if it doesn't blow our mind... You get the fart. You get farted out. And it's all in good fun. We love you. It's done with love.

Yeah, we don't want to fart you out. But we have to be real. We will if we have to. So the first brave person to step up and tell their story is Paul. Hi, Paul. G'day, Paul. Howdy, how we doing? Good, thanks, Paul.

Tell us, what's your big coincidence story? So I started dating this girl about five years ago. We're now engaged had our first son about three months ago so you could say it's going reasonably well. Yeah, it's on track. Nice work Paul. Yeah, on track. Congrats. Cheers, cheers. Hey so we're looking back through old family photos. We're about three years into the relationship at this point, and we pulled out a family photo of a fifth birthday party

that we were both at about 30 years ago. Both of me, her, and her brother all sitting around enjoying some cherry toast. Wait, wait a minute. Paul, this will make or break it for me, and I think probably for Clint as well. Whereabouts did you grow up? Christ's church. Oh, come on.

It's New Zealand, Paul. It's New Zealand. At some stage, we've all shared a sausage with somebody, you know? Yeah. I get the vibe for you guys. You would have been like, oh, my God. That's wild. Yeah.

But it's like my sister and her now husband, they saw a picture of themselves at a birthday party together back in the day. But, I mean, there's only, you know, four people that come from Stanthorpe. Sorry, Paul. Sorry. Good story, though, Paul. Lame. L, Paul. Sorry. Good story, though, Paul. Lame. See ya.

Still cool, though, Paul. Let's get Janine on. Hi, Janine. Hi, Jeannie. Oh, Jeannie. Hi, Jeannie. Hi, how's it going? I don't think Paul took it very well.

Promise us you'll take it better. If we're forced, if we're forced to fart you out, okay? Okay, but I bet you you won't. Okay, good attitude. Come on, Jeannie. Come on, give it to us. Okay, so I took my about seven, eight-year-old daughter on a school trip which was making art out of recycled stuff,

junk, and she went along all the way down this long thing all the way down the room and chose the piece of thing that she wanted to make her art out of and brought it to me to show me. And it was my dad's scuba diving flipper that he threw out in the inorganic collection years prior. And you were at a random junkyard. This wasn't on your property. It was actually, it was out in West Auckland where they do art and they'd just basically

gone out to the chip and got a whole bunch of staff and then brought it in. How did you know it was your dad's? Because it had his initials, BD, written on the front of the flipper and I grew up looking at those flippers.

There's enough distance, there's enough removal in that story that it's like... It's gone away from the complete environment and then somehow

managed to come back to you. Yeah. Do you think that... She chose it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're... She was drawn to that. But she chose it out of the whole thing. She was drawn to that thing. For some reason, she saw that thing and she went, I need to pick this flipper.

Because why would a kid pick a flipper as well? Weird thing to choose. I believe in people sending you messages. Do you think that was your dad sending you a message? Oh, well, yeah, absolutely. And you should have seen his face when we took the finished art back to him and showed it. Oh, he's not dead.

No, he's not dead yet. Oh. Well, yeah, absolutely. And you should have seen his face when we took the finished art back to him and showed it. Oh, he's not dead. Oh, he's not dead yet. No, he's not dead yet. Well, good. That's great news, Jenny. Good. Okay, right there. I feel like I should be farted out for that. The dad could still be sending messages.

The dad could have gone, hey, when you go to the junk shop, I've got an old flipper out the back. I'm just going to hold on. I missed that flipper. I'm just going to remove my foot from my mouth. Is it Shaya? Do we say Shaya? Hi, yeah, it's Chaya. Chaya.

Okay, Chaya. We're one and one. You will make or break the segment as to whether we get a success or a failure this week. When you're ready, blow our minds. Alrighty, I've got a goodie. Okay, so in high school, there was a new guy that started at my high school. One thing leads to another. We ended up going, we're dating, and I ended up bringing him home to meet my parents.

And I walked into the room with him, and my mum looked him dead in the eyes and said, I know what your name is. This is exactly what your name is. Your birthday is March 6th. That's my birthday. You were born in the hospital room over from my daughter, Chaya, who you're now dating, and you're an hour, you were born an hour after her, and your mum was still out

and screaming and really put me off my game. Wait, wait. Wait, so you're dating, you were dating the guy that was born an hour after you in the same hospital, near the same bed. And how did your mum know? Has she kept in contact with that other mum? She met his mum after he was born. And, like, I don't know how it all works, but she met him,

and she was like, yep, this is your mum's name. I remember meeting her in the hospital. I know exactly who you are. I recognise your face. People say he's got a real baby face. Yeah, well, Yeah, he does. This is the important detail because we farted out the first guy for a fifth birthday coincidence.

This is essentially a first birthday or a zero birthday coincidence. This is the clincher. Has your mum kept in contact with that other mum at all or has she recognised your boyfriend from a baby? Yes. Well, funny thing is, is my dad actually grew up with his mum. So my mum's not from Auckland, but his mum actually knows my dad as well,

and she's kept in contact because she knows my dad. Wait, where was this? So this is in Auckland, but my mum is from, like, far north, Northland. But this happened in Auckland? Yeah, this people in Auckland, but my mum is from like far north, Northland. But this happened in Auckland? Yeah, this happened in Auckland. And you were born in Northland? Yeah.

Oh, that's pretty. You know what, I'm going to do it, I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. It was touch and go. It was touch and go. Oh, it was touch and go. No, no, yeah, it was a big coincidence. No, absolutely big coincidence.

Absolutely big coincidence. We're just trying to keep the bar high. Oh, man, this is so hard. Thank you, Chai. Thank you for calling out. We really appreciate it. Do you think it was your dad or your mum's way of sending you a message? Oh, well, it didn't last long.

He dumped me over text a couple months after that. After all that, you were born together. Bree and Clint. Hey. It's my birthday. It's my birthday. Bree and Clint's birthday banger. We're not, like, you know, tore up about it.

We don't think about it, obviously. Oh, obviously, we don't dwell on it or anything. No, no, no, no. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, not at all. Let's go to Hester. Hi, Hester. Hi, Hester.

Hello. Hello. What's your birthday, Hester? 2nd October, 88. All right, you were 16 in 2004 on the 2nd of October. And in 2004, this reached the top of the chart. Oh, banger. Great music video as well.

Sierra and Goodies. Hester, do you like it? I do like that, yes. Yeah. Pretty good one, Hester. Okay, wait there. We're going to go to Aaron. Hey, Aaron.

G'day, guys. How you going, man? Yeah, good old Monday afternoon. Yeah, I know. Are you on your way back to the house? What are you up to? Just got home, so looking forward to cooking dinner. Hey, Aaron.

Aaron, what are you cooking? Oh, steak. And a beer. A bit of steak and mashed potatoes. Going to down it with a beer, Aaron? Maybe two. Oh, don't talk dirty, Aaron. What's your birthday, man? What's. Oh, don't talk dirty, Aaron. What's your birthday, man?

What's your birthday? 5th of March, 92. All right, you were 16 in 2008 on the 5th of March. And Aaron, here's your birthday banger. You got me begging you for mercy. Why won't you release? Great song. You got me begging you for mercy. Duffy and Mercy. Great song.

Duffy and Mercy. Would that go well with a steak and some mashed potatoes and a couple of beers, Aaron? Maybe an extra beer. I like Aaron. Okay, wait there. Zoe's here. Hi, Zoe. Hi, Zoe.

How are you? Good, thank you. How was the Monday? Out of 10? Was it, you know, solid? Or was the boss a bit of an a-hole today? Oh, look, I'm glad to be driving home. That's all I'm going to say.

Yes, Zoe. Okay, Zoe, give us your birthday. Same here. Ross Boss, what a tool. What's your birthday, Zoe? 9th of September, 1988. All right, you were 16 in 2004 on the 9th of September. And on that day, this was number one.

Mr. Second Place on the first season of New Zealand Idol, Topor's finest, Michael Murphy. What do you think, Zoe? Is it horrible to say I've never heard that song before? You've never heard Michael Murphy? You're more of a Ben Lummis girl, were you? I know who Michael Murphy is, but I've never heard that song. Yeah, right.

Okay. Not much cut through this song, apparently. Well, number one, but I think only briefly. Okay, Zoe, wait there. It's between Aaron's Duffy, Zoe's Michael Murphy, and Hester's Goodies. Are we in a Duffy mood? Usually I would go Sierra and Goodies, but I feel like I Are we in a Duffy mood? Usually I would go Sierra and goodies, but I feel like I might be in a Duffy mood.

You're going to go up the Duff. I want to go up the Duff with Aaron today. I loved Aaron, the dirty guy. I'm going to go goodies Sierra. Okay, you're going to split the vote. We will go to a decider. We haven't done this for a while. The deciding vote goes to producer Anastasia this afternoon.

Anastasia, pick the winner of Birthday Banger. When I turn your microphone on, pick the winner of Birthday Banger. Were you pre-thinking that I wasn't going to say your vote? Because I'm definitely going for goodies. Yes, Anastasia! Shouldn't have turned my mic on, mate. Yes! Well, that's decided it then.

Sexy, independent girl. The winner of Birthday Banger is Hester and Sierra and Goodies. Yeah. Yeah, girl. Let's go. Brian Clint, ZM. I got my sick repetition. ZM, Brian Clint, the winner of Birthday Banger today is Sierra and Goodies.

We're just in the studio watching the music video. It's a good video. If there is a woman that oozes sex appeal, it's Sierra. Oh, yeah. And just effortlessly. What year is this song again?

Um, Goodies. I'm scrumptious. I'm going to say 2005. 2004. Yeah, right. Just so, just like attractive and cool. Whereas I'm the complete opposite of that.

So when I see women like that, I'm like, how do they do it? You do you, boo. How do they do that? Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the studio fellow Aussies, Matt and Jack from the Inspired Unemployed. Welcome to New Zealand. Thank you. How's that applause?

I know, it feels good. Yeah, we have a crowd that's out there in the booth that just does it. Just give them a little wave. Thank you guys. You have to come in every day and make us feel good. Yeah, yeah, it's good for us. It's good self-esteem. Speaking of feeling good, do you guys feel all right after getting tackled

by the All Blacks? Feeling pretty rough to be honest. I was just worried about this nose ring. I just got that put in. So the nose ring is part of what you guys

have been doing with Uber, right? It's the this or that thing where people decide what you have to do. What was the other option? I got my nipple and he got his nose.

Oh man, it hurt. Well, Clint would know. Haven't you got the gooch piss? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No way. Give us a look. Give us a look. yeah. No way. Give us a look. Give us a look.

That's a lot. Give us a look. We wanted to do something similar with you guys this afternoon. So while you're here, we thought, why let the fun stop now? Even though the Uber part of it is over. Uh-oh, what's going on here? What about some more this or that? I thought we could play a bit of a game where we come up with, you know,

the this or the that, and then you guys can pick the this or the that for each other. Okay. Who wants to go first? Yep. Get it over and done with. You're in, Jack. All right.

So your first option in your this or that is you can either do a shot of anchovy oil. I thought Monday's the day where we're done. Producer Anastasia. Why do you even bother coming in here? This is way fun. So that's one of your options. It doesn't look great.

No. What is this? Or. Or is my spring in. So that's one of your options. It doesn't look great. I'll be honest. No. What is this? Or, or, or, who is the most famous person in your phone right now? I'll do the shot.

There's no one famous, that's why. All right, you ready for the shot? You're actually going to do it. Okay. It's fresh though. It's fresh.

It's just come from the supermarket. Am I going to die or what? No, no, no. Fresh out of the jar. It's like a Mediterranean diet. It's good for you. I don't have to eat anchovy in it's fresh, it's just come from the supermarket today Am I going to die or what? No, no, no Fresh out of the jar It's like a Mediterranean diet, it's good for you I don't have to eat the anchovy in it No, no You just do the shot

You just drink the appetiser Drink their liquids Jack from the Inspired Unemployed Can we get a bit in here? Get that, get the last bit Oh dude, that tastes like shit Well done, well done, that was bloody good Can we get a bit in here? Get that. Get the last bit. No, no, no. Oh, dude. That tastes like shit. Well done.

Well done. Well done. That was bloody good. That was very impressive. Very impressive. But, Matt, you're up next. All this, all that. The first one is you can either scull a beer and we put this shot collar around your arm

whilst you're doing that. Or you can go out into the office where you don't know anyone. You're a guest here at ZM today and you can announce to the entire office that you've just taken a big poo in the toilet. I might go tell everyone this is shit. Alright, let's get

on the line. Can I have a sip of your beer then? You take the beer to wash down the anchovy oil. There's a phone waiting out there for you. You go outside Grab the phone We'll put that on speaker It needs to be convincing So you need to be yelling this Like

Can I have everyone's attention And then announce What you need to announce Good luck Good luck brother Alright here we go Alright Here we go

Oh no This is bad Oh he would be so embarrassed Right now I'm embarrassed And I work here What am I doing Yeah it's not too late To come back and get the beer.

No, beer's gone. I've already finished it. All right, I'm about to go for it. Hey, everyone. I was going to let you know I just did a massive s*** in the toilet. It clogged and if anyone has a plunger. Oh, God, this is bad. That's disgusting.

I'm sorry, that's too far. I relate to her. Have some respect. Yeah, have some respect. 1.1 million Instagram followers and you do that kind of thing? It was bad. They all hate me. You're some egoistic dickhead that just walked out.

I'd be like, who is this guy? This guy loves himself. Way more cringe than what I thought it was going to be. Well, you should try listening to it, man. It was pretty bad. Matt and Jack from the Inspired Unemployed. That was bloody good. That was very good. Before you guys go, I'm Unemployed. That was bloody good. That was very good.

Before you guys go, I'm pretty sure, Jack, you and I are cousins. No. I think we are. So your last name is Steel with an E on the end. I don't know if you're joking or not right now. No, I'm not joking. I'm not joking. My mum's maiden name is Steel.

So I'd like some of the royalties of you. And excitingly, the last this or that is pass your cousin. Pass, pass, pass. It or that is pass your cousin. It's legal here in New Zealand. Jack with you in spite of unemployed. Bloody good to see you guys. Thanks guys. Cheers.

People are fuzzing at the idea of going, buying themselves some furniture in a box, going home, getting out their shitty screwdriver that they got as a promotional screwdriver with a box of going home, getting out their shitty screwdriver that they got

as a promotional screwdriver with a box of beer once. An Ikea flat pack is actually worse than a fart in the face. Exactly right. It's worse for your relationship than cheating. It's terrible. You do that with your partner, you guys are going to break up. I've always got leftover screws. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Always. You say to your partner, babe, look. But like after a breakup with a partner. All right, I knew we were going there. You say to your partner, babe, look. But like, after a breakup with a partner. Alright, that's there. I knew we were going there. Ikea have announced, there are some announcements for Ikea in New Zealand. This has been coming for a while and

I actually, being from Aussie, when you talked to me about it one time. Do you guys have Ikea over there? Well, I was like, what do you mean you don't have Ikea? Because that's something that's been in Australia for ages. All we've got is Kmart. Yeah, because we've also got Big W, Target.

Big W? Now you're just making up shots. No, that's a real shot. You're a Big W, by the way. It's a real shot. You're a Big W. That's how I refer to you. You're a little W.

Ikea. This is good. This is the news you want, okay? Ikea have announced. Yeah, this is what news you want, okay? Ikea have announced. Is it? Yeah, this is what you want. Is it? They will announce, they have announced they'll open their store in New Zealand in the next three or four months. Whoa! That's pretty soon.

Seems fast, considering we don't even know if they've begun building the store yet. But I assume the store is a flat pack that you can put together afterwards. It'll be like, you know, done in like two or three weeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There will be one full-sized IKEA store in Auckland where people can go in and access the entire IKEA range. They'll also have the IKEA experience,

which I assume means the cheap hot dogs. And the Swedish meatballs. And the meatballs. To be honest, that's my favourite thing about IKEA. If I'm completely honest, I don't want to get anyone's hopes up, but the best thing about Ikea is the $1 hot dogs and the cheap meatballs.

Okay, well, good for that then. Keen for those. That's a great time, I'm not going to lie. It is a little bit more expensive than what you'd imagine. Ikea is? Yeah, the furniture. So the whole idea of Ikea was it was cheap. Is it not? Well, maybe it's because I used to go there in my early 20s

and I was a student and had no money. But that's who they're targeting. Surely that's who they're targeting. I could never afford anything from Ikea. Right, okay. So don't go in there expecting to get a whole kitchen for, you know, $250 because not the case. They're opening an Ikea studio in Wellington

and they're opening an even smaller Ikea store in Christchurch. But the entire Ikea range is going to be available on their online store in New Zealand. Oh, so you can buy it online. So if you love Ikea, you can buy it online. So if you're from Invercargill, you can still purchase something online and get it sent to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, cool. You can buy your $1 hot dogs and they'll put it in a little courier bag. I can't wait to get the hot dogs on Uber Eats. Yeah, yes. Bree and Clint. From the people who bought you aviation news and maritime news comes some Bree and Clint. It's just awful time until I get the thing.

Space news. We've got space news, baby. There's been a lot of space news lately. Has there? Yeah, there was talks of Jeff Bezos, the richest man in the world, taking himself to space. Yes. And then there was talks of the guy who invented Tesla. Elon Musk.

Building a spaceship. Yeah. And then also, I don't know something else. Well today's Space News is about Jeff Bezos and his trip into space. So thank you for that. Thank you for that.

Can you imagine if just before Mike McRoberts is about to do the headlines, Samantha Hayes goes hey don't do the Jeff Bezos story because I've already heard it. Yeah I heard this a while ago, this one No, you haven't heard this This is an update on Jeff Bezos So he's off

We already knew that He's going on the first His is called like Galactic Blue Operation Uranus Yeah, something like that His ship is in the build process And the team has been assembled

He's on the ship But he was auctioning off one seat to be on the spacecraft. That's the story I saw. It's sold. The seat is sold. How much? So to go on the first commercial space flight,

the first time you, a layperson, can pay to go into outer space. Not since Lance Bass from NSYNC went bankrupt trying to buy himself a seat on the NASA spaceship. Has anything been so exciting? The seat has sold for $28 million. I mean, it doesn't seem like all that much considering the very first one.

Doesn't it? $28 million. You don't get to get out. You don't get to walk around out there. You go up. Oh, you just go up. You go up. Oh, you don't even get to get out. No, you're not landing on the moon. Wait, do I have to sit next to Jeff the whole time? Yes, it's a seat next to Bezos.

It's like getting put into first class when you're a commoner, like us. Yeah. Oh, no, wait, you're already in first class. It's nice up there. What's it like for you when us peasants come up and sit in first class? Not good. It'd be horrible.

Not good because it takes longer for my moist towelettes to get to me. $28 million. The buyer has opted to remain anonymous. They don't want to be named, which would be good. They can put their space helmet on and they won't be able to be recognised. Do you reckon it's – what's his name? The guy that just got a divorce? Bill Gates. Do you reckon it's Bill Gates?

Could be Gates. Gatesy could be spending some of that Bachelor money to go into space with Bezos. I can just picture them having a degustation up in space. But you know who it should be? Who? Elon Musk. Elon Musk should buy a seat, buy the other seat,

because he's going into space too. He's racing to get up there. Buy a seat on Bezos' flight and then ruin the experience for him. Just the whole time, just bug him, just be like, Bezos, can I touch your head? Bezos, Bezos.

Why does my Amazon shipping take so long to get here? Can you imagine Bezos' face? How fun is just it saying Bezos? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bezos. Bezos. I feel like he'd be the...

Do a fart on Bezos' spaceship? $28 million to do a fart on Bezos' spaceship. That's 100% worth it That's what billionaires do That's the sort of things they do for fun So there you go There is your signature

Brian Clint space news Thanks mate I hadn't heard that story at all Yeah right That was so enlightening Thank you mate ZM's brand Clint on Insta Facebook TikTok and live weekdays from 3 on ZM fed by KFC get the full menu delivered to your door

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