ZM's Bree & Clint - ZM's Bree & Clint Podcast - 6th April 2023

Episode Date: April 6, 2023

Happy International Burrito Day Speaking of, Clint eats 1kg of burrito We have a What's The Plot WINNER Do you have a dedicated side of the bed? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Alright, here we go! I don't feel very good. I don't feel very good at all. Why? He had a colonic. I had the opposite of a colonic. You need a colonic now. I need a colonic.

Is that the pita pit? What? No, it was burrito. A burrito! A pita pit from yesterday. Sorry. It's coming back. Whatever. Just trying to keep the jokes rolling. Some jokes are not for the radio, Ella.

Yeah. Have a think about what you're saying. We only eat KFC on this show. It's our show sponsor. Sponsor except for today when I ate a lot of burrito. But you'll find out about that later in the podcast. There was a reason for it.

There's a reason why I feel awful. There's a reason why I feel... He tried to shelve a burrito, okay? Again, the opposite. And he nailed it. It's time for one of these though. It's my birthday. It's my birthday.

Brian Clint's birthday thing. The podcast. Yeah! You tell us your birthday in our Bree and Clint podcast family Facebook page, which, is that page growing? Are we getting more members of the podcast family? How many members do we have? Oh gosh It's about 3,000 last time I checked. I think it's like 3.7

Or maybe I'm wrong 3.8. Damn I checked. I think it's like 3.7. Or maybe I'm wrong. 3.8. Damn, girl. Damn. Someone who is a member of that podcast family is Richard Eden from Birmingham. That was pretty good, wasn't it? Yeah. Really?

Yeah. That's what a Birmingham accent sounds like. Birmingham is Peaky Blinders, isn't it? Yeah, it's Birmingham. That's pretty good. No fucking fighting. I've done worse, let's be real. Rita Hall is back.

Okay, Richard, you were born on the 24th of July, 1988, which means you were 16 in 2004. And Richard, here it is, your birthday bang. Yes, Richard. Yes, Richard. Yes, Richard. I re-watched Usher's NPR Tiny Desk performance for, I'm going to say the ninth time the other day.

That's so funny because I watched Usher's sex tape for the ninth time he would have one he would um the to be honest with you the npr tiny desk performance is not far off a sex tape anyway it's very i might go watch that it's got i'll add it to my collection he's the goat in my opinion okay let's do's do one for Jason Smith from Brizzy in Australia. G'day, Jason from Brizzy. You were born on the 30th of Jan, 1991, which means you were 16 in 2007. And, Jase, here's your birthday banger. Let's go. I could be whipple, I could be purple,

I could be anything you like. The Good Mika song. Yeah. Are you implying there's. The Good Mika song. Yeah. Are you implying there's only one Good Mika song? Do you like that one? Everybody's gonna love today. Love today, love today. I a little bit do, yeah.

Do you like the song Big Girls, You Are Beautiful? I love that one too. Is it not a bit condescending, that one? No. Yeah, I kind of feel like I don't want to hear it from a real skinny man. The big girls are like, we knew we were beautiful. Like female big girl empowerment. Did someone say we weren't beautiful?

Actually, we were being harsh on Mika. He was just trying to bring us ladies up. Did you watch when he hosted Eurovision? Was he good? Oh my God, so good. So fun. He seems like a fun-loving type of dude. Let's do one more for the lady with the greatest last name I've hosted Eurovision. Was he good? Oh my God, so good. So fun. He seems like a fun-loving type of dude. Let's do one more for the lady with the greatest last name I've ever heard.

Diane Wines. Diane Wines. W-I-N-E-S. Yes, roll through, Diane. She's from Maryland in the US, but she's currently living in Cornwall in the UK. Middle name, Pino Grigio. Nice work, Diane. No, middle name, should we have a few?

Diane, you were born on the 19th of Feb 1972, which means you were 16 in 1988. And Diane, here's your birthday banger. Oh my God. Kylie. I saw the most incredible video of Kylie Minogue from Formula 1.

Did you see it? The DJ plays the Kylie song? Yeah, so the DJ's playing the Kylie song, and then Kylie's kind of standing there, and then she walks up to the front of the DJ, and there's this big crowd around her, and then she's going like she's getting the crowd hyped up and then hits the drop.

It was sick. I was like Kylie. Imagine DJing Kylie Minogue, and then Kylie Minogue appears on the dance floor. So good. So good. So good. Still voting for Usher.

Yeah, I think I'm going for Usher. Confessions part two. Watch this. Oh my God. It's raining here today in Auckland. I'm going to go do some Usher dance moves out of the rain. This is the perfect song for it. Video it.

Yeah. Watch this Or you can imagine it We're off for a long weekend Four days Have a great Easter everybody We'll catch you back soon Eat lots of chocolate

Bye Bye Should I sing it? You going? Oh no I've got too much burrito in me Oh no Could have been burrito all over the desk.

It's Brie and Clint. Kia ora everybody. Welcome to the show. It's Brie and Clint. We're all of a sudden, it's March 2020 and everybody here is trying not to get COVID. It's April. Yeah, I know. I said it's March 2020 and everybody here is trying not to get COVID. It's April. Yeah, I know.

I said it's March 2020. That's when COVID started. I was like, mate, March was a few weeks ago. Oh, and 2020 was even further ago. It was. Yeah, you're right. Everyone's going down with COVID. Typical.

Typical. The long weekend. I just saw Vaughan post on Instagram that his family's got COVID, which means their long weekend away is cancelled. Mate, if there's anyone that shouldn't be getting COVID, it is you because your brother's wedding's this weekend. I got my brother's wedding this weekend. I can't get bloody COVID.

Can we get the bubble wrap in here, please? Let's put Clint in a bubble. He'll be the boy in the bubble. Can I get the bubble wrap in here, please? Let's put Clint in a bubble. He'll be the boy in the bubble. Can I get a respirator? And that's good, too, because he's been dropping farts all afternoon. I have not. Imagine the boy in the bubble. It would just stay in the bubble.

Yeah, but he wouldn't smell them after a while. Just be rolling around in there. So they say you can't smell your own house. He wouldn't be able to smell the inside of his bubble. Smell your own house. Everyone's house has able to smell the inside of his bubble. Smell your own house. Everyone's house has a smell. Does it? Yeah.

Yeah. But you can't smell your own house because you live in it. You just think that's what normal is. Like every person has their own smell. Exactly right. Like their own pheromone. The boy in the bubble would not be able to smell his bubble. Yeah.

Hope not. Poor boy in the bubble. Did you guys ever remember those pheromone perfumes I don't remember perfumes what do you remember putting your own pheromones on different parts of your body

before a night out how do you do that oh yuck that's yuck but people do it there's pheromone perfumes where they say they've made these perfumes with the pheromones and it attracts people to you. Yeah.

What a load of BS. Today on the show, there's $500 cash up for grabs. Thanks to Cookie Times Cookie Sandwiches. But we're going to play Tradiverse Lady right now where the ladies are slightly ahead and they have the chance to cement that lead ahead of the long weekend if they can win again. Can they do it?

Is it going to be you? You've got to call now 0800-DIAL-ZM. We'll play next. Bree and Clint. Time for tradie versus lady. Bree and Clint. Tradie versus lady. All right, here we go.

The tradies versus the ladies. The right, here we go. The Tradies versus the Ladies. The last game before the long, long weekend. Can the Tradies even it up and win today? They're on 28. The Ladies, they're on 29. They might pull away further. Our Lady is calling us from the Tron. She's 20 and she's doing the Tongariro Crossing tomorrow.

Please welcome to the show, Lily. Lily, RIP to you. I welcome to the show, Lily. Lily, RIP to you. I've done it and oh my God, never again. I'm really looking forward to it, but we'll see how it goes. Can I just give you a little bit of warning? Bree's like, don't be excited. Don't do it. Don't do it.

Don't do it. But if you knew me, Lily, it's not my thing. You could absolutely love it. The worst part for me was after walking up the steepest hills. The devil's staircase. It was the downward part. Yeah. Like my shins were just burning.

Did you try going down backwards? Oh, I did. And then I nearly tripped and fell. And I would have died, so. All right, Lily. Well, good on you. You're taking on our tradie today. He's calling from Dunedin.

He's 34. And he has a vasectomy. Oh, he had a vasectomy 45 minutes ago. Welcome to the show, Nathan. G'day, Nathan. Are you on ice right now? No, I'm in the middle of driving home. Wow.

Did you not get a travel ice pack? No, no, I didn't. They gave me a complimentary travel ice pack for my one. Damn. You don't want to hear that right now, do you? All right, well, get those gonads on ice ASAP. You're going to need it. Nathan, your buzzer is tradie.

Lily, your buzzer is lady. Your brother is also. First of three wins 50 bucks from KFC. Good luck. Here we go, guys. Question number one. Your brother is also. First to three wins 50 bucks from KFC. Good luck. Here we go, guys. Question number one. Chloe Swarbrick has been called a crybaby in a group chat by a member of her own party.

What political party does Chloe belong to? Yes, Nathan. Greens. That is, of course, the Greens party. Nice work. One to the tradies. Question number two. What colour is an emerald? Lily.

Yes. Lily, we will give you one, but your buzzer is lady, but yes, you can answer. Sorry. Green. It is green. Two answers that are green. Both green.

Nice work. Are we going for three in a row? Who knows? We're one apiece. Question number three. Clint's green. That is correct. Which member of the Avengers

also goes by the name... Green. Yes, Nathan? The Hulk. I mean, worth a shot. Sticking with the green theme. No. Worth a shot, Nathan. Nice work. The rest of the question, I'll read it again.

Which member of the Avengers also goes by the name Tony Stark? Lily. Lady. Lily, that would have been yours if you'd used the right buzzer. Nathan? Iron Man. Yeah. It is, of course, Iron Man.

Two to the tradies, one to the ladies. Question number four. Buzz in when you can tell me who sings this song. Hey, I just met you. Trady. Yes, Nathan, you're just in. Carly Rae Jepsen? He's got it.

Oh, he's a working ass man. Nathan, I'm so glad that that operation hasn't affected anything because you're on fire. Balls are on fire too. Literally. Have a great weekend on the couch, Nathan. Thanks for playing. We've got 50 bucks from KFC for you.

Cheers, guys. All good. Bree and Clint. Guys, it is a big day. It is huge. It is the international day of... I have no idea. Stop asking me.

I've waited for this day, can I say, for, well, 12 months since this time last year. Yeah, the producer said you had them put a special appointment in the calendar. Today is... Not my calendar, though. No, not your calendar because it's a surprise for you. Guys, please stand with me to celebrate International Burrito Day! It is officially

International Burrito Day today. One of my all-time favourite foods and yours, Clint? Why are we all doing some culturally inappropriate dancing? I'm just doing a dance. I love burritos. I love burritos. You do love burritos.

And it reminded me of something. They call me the burrito. Yeah, me too. Because I just eat them all. It's funny you say that because I recalled something you said on our show. And this was a while ago. And to be honest, I feel like it was before you had your nose surgery. So you sound a little bit different in this clip.

It would have been a long time ago. Yeah. Six months ago. It was last year. It was last year sometime. So you do sound a little bit different. But you said this on the show. Roll the clip.

If I had to pick one food to eat forever, I feel like it would be burritos. I could just eat so many burritos in one go. Hey, Brie, did I ever tell you about the time I ate a one kilo burrito in 20 minutes? Oh, bullshit, mate. That did not happen. There is no way you could do that. Nah, mate.

For real. I'm totally not joking. I swear on anything. I absolutely killed that one kilo burrito. All right, Clinton Roberts, I guess we'll just have to take your word for it. It was like it was yesterday. Yeah, I definitely said that, yeah. And I thought to myself, Clint, if there ever was a day that you could prove this outlandish statement you definitely made, you on the show, the audio's there, it's proof.

It was today, National Burrito Day. I don't even know what a one kilo burrito looks like. Well, do you think you could do it? Yeah, I do. Because we have blocked out the next 20 minutes of the show. It might be arrogant, but I do believe that I could

eat a kilo of burrito. We have here a fresh, delicious chicken burrito. She's girthy. She's weighty. Oh, did I mention they couldn't put it in one burrito? Oh, shit. So they had to put it across three burritos. Three?

I was shocked enough at the idea that it would be two. I've got the last one here. So that there, those three burritos equal a one kilo burrito. So when we're ready, start the timer. Clinton Roberts is going to prove to us that he can eat a one kilo burrito. That's portion down to three. Are you sure eat a one kilo burrito that's portioned down in three. Are you sure this is one kilo? Positive.

Far out. Positive. In 20 minutes, you have on the clock. This is bigger than like three kebabs that you would get on the way home. It's a lot of food. It's a lot of food. 20 minutes on the clock. Can you start with the chicken one? Because in case you don't get to the pork one, I want a lot of food. It's a lot of food. 20 minutes on the clock. Can you start with the chicken one

because in case you don't get to the pork one, I want to eat that one. Okay. No, that's the pork one. How do you know? Because I know. Alright, that's, yeah, that one. Start with that one. 20 minutes on the clock to see if Clint can prove what

he said on the show a year ago. Right. Ready? Claudia, start the timer. He's away. First bite down. Yum. Is it delish? Good burrito.

Where is this from? They're nice and fresh. A Mexican shop down the road. Yum. Good burrito. All right. We're going to go to a song. And Clint is going to have 20 minutes on the clock to see if he can literally fit three of those burritos.

Can I get a Corona? Yeah, whatever you want, mate. Can I get a side of corn chips? No, dumb idea. To be honest, I'd save the space. We'll be back after this to see if he can do it. Brie and Clint, yum. Brie and Clint.

ZM, Brie and Clint, that's one republic and I ain't worried. Maybe I should do the back announcing for this part. You do it. Bree and Clint. Yum. Bree and Clint. ZM, Bree and Clint. That's one republic and I ain't worried. Maybe I should do the back announcing for this part. You do those. Okay, cool. Welcome to International Burrito Day, everyone. Happy International Burrito Day. Happy International Burrito Day. Look, it's one of our favourite holidays here on the Bree and Clint show,

starting from today. And I've been waiting for this day for a while because Clint on the show about a year ago said, do you have the button to play the flashback? Yeah, I do, yeah. Clint said this on the show. So I'm doing this one-handed while I eat burrito. Can you, here we go.

If I had to pick one food to eat forever, I feel like it would be burritos. I could just eat so many burritos in one go. Hey, Brie, did I ever tell you about the time I ate a one-kilo burrito in 20 minutes? Oh, bullshit, mate. That did not happen. There is no way you could do that.

Nah, mate, for real. I'm totally not joking. I swear on anything. I absolutely killed that one-kilo burrito. All right, Clinton Roberts, I guess we'll just have to take your word for it. We're not going to have to take his word for it because we have ordered

three burritos which makes up one kilo's worth of burrito here this afternoon. They're massive. Each one of these three burritos is big. They're quite a hefty burrito. I've just got to the spicy bit. And he is almost at the bottom of burrito number one, but as we know, the stomach starts to fill up.

Can I get a time check? Claudia, can we please check the time? How long has he got? Officially, it's been four minutes and 20 seconds. Okay. You're going pretty well so far, but the first one's always the easiest. Can I get some, like, messages of support?

Can you get some of my, like, family members on to, like, cheer me on and maybe a message to my kids? Go on, Dad. You're eating a one kilo burrito. You're not going to the Olympics. Settle down. Burrito Olympics. Burrito Olympics. Alright.

He's nearly at the bottom of burrito number one. We're four minutes into the one kilo burrito challenge in 20 minutes. Can he do it? Stay tuned. We'll be back. Bree and Clint. Here we are.

If you've just joined us, we are in the middle, in amongst the one kilo burrito challenge in 20 minutes. Clint is on the ropes at this point. I just requested a bucket. There is three minutes left. We need to go to a song because when we come back, you'll have 30 seconds to get this done. Let's go to Kill Bill Scissor.

You're on Brian Clint. Can he do it? Will he be victorious or will he vomit? My stomach feels hard. It's one of the two. I feel pregnant. Welcome back to the one kilo burrito in 20 minute challenge. Ouch.

How are you feeling over there? We are at the back end of this burrito challenge. I feel a bit defeated because there's quite a lot of burrito left in my hand. You have a lot of burrito. But people can't see how much burrito I've eaten. I mean... I've eaten so much burrito. I'm going to say you've eaten 750 grams.

Quite a lot of burrito. Well, actually, I'm not even going to give you that. What do you think, Producer Claude? How much has he eaten? Because he's got nearly a full burrito left. No, this is not nearly a full burrito. That is almost nearly a full burrito. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

What are you saying? He's not good. He's not good. Alright, we're down into the last seconds now. Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, he's throwing in the towel, five, four,

three, two, one. It is all over. Call your mums. Call your daughters. Call your brothers and sisters and tell them. Can you please? Can you please?

It's an epic fail here this afternoon. I did actually want to complete this. Did you though? Yeah, I did. It was a lot of mucking around. You felt my tummy. This is so hard. How do you feel this?

I feel like. I'm not touching that. I don't want to trigger anything. He had a tantrum in the middle of it, and then he was questioning whether it was one kilo of burrito or not. You all... Oh, he spats him out. Just that last mouthful, because that's pointless.

Can I ask? Yeah. Because I did want to give this my all. I'd love to win the one kilo burrito challenge. It's always good to have something to train for next year. Yes. Can you weigh this last bit so I know how much

I did? Yes. Because I need to know what a PB, I need like a baseline. We will weigh the last bit. I think we need to go to a song. That is off. Alright, there you have it. The result, a fail for this year. Oh, wait, this is underwhelming.

But, mate, there's always next year. Happy International Burrito Day, everyone. Is that it? Mate. Is that it? Mate, I'm not the one that lost. Is this not the bit where you reveal to me that actually that was 1.5 kilos of burrito? You know, that would be a classic.

I was like, is that it? That would be a classic radio gag. But no, we gave you a kilo and you just failed. That was one kilo. We keep it real. When I was holding that plate, I was like, she's shitting me. She's pulling my leg. Mate, we keep it real on this show.

You know that. I'm sorry. I know it's not nice to fail. But without failure, you don't. I'm sorry, I know it's not nice to fail, but without failure, you don't know what success feels like. I told you that quote yesterday. No, I said the quote yesterday and you said that's a

great quote. Play the damn song, Claudia, I need to go to the bathroom. We'll be back. Brie and Clint. Brie just told me she didn't weigh the burritos. She told me that she has no knowledge of how heavy those three burritos were. She just winged it and thought three burritos would be enough.

So theoretically, I could have just eaten 1.2 kilos of burrito. Mate, I don't know if you know this, but I have a very good eye for these things. And I eyeballed it and thought three burritos equals one kilo. Brie's also eating the leftover burrito. Call ZM now to play Brie and Clint's What's the Plot? I have no regrets

about today. I feel like that went perfectly. Starting to feel like this was just a way for you to get free burrito. Mate, you got a free burrito. You got two free burritos. Yes, you got two free burritos. Yes, Claude? I have some information about the weight of the burritos.

Yes. If you'd like. I just called the place that we got them from. Please make it that it's under one kilo. I'm so sorry, Clint. How much does each burrito weigh? 500 grams. I just ate 1.2 kilos of burrito. Approximately, yes.

Hey! Congratulations! You've done it! Woo-hoo! Woo! Hooray! Success! We did it, guys! Success! We did it, guys. Woo!

I ate 200 extra grams of burrito for nothing. Guys, now that I think about it, we should double check these things and not just, you know, wing it. This is why I usually run the eating challenges, okay? I know, but wasn't this fun for everyone involved? I think so. If you want to start an argument in your car right now,

and I know a lot of people are stuck in cars right now. It's probably not a good idea to bring this up right now. The traffic is really bad. This is how you do it, okay? No one's allowed to Google the answer. We've just had the conversation. And we used Google and it was confusing enough. Here's the question to start an argument

on your card this afternoon. What's the difference between a raisin and a sultana? What is the difference? Don't Google it. Don't Google it. We want your answers on 9696. Text them through if you think you know. Don't Google it. This is an honesty policy, all right?

Hey, hey, hey, hey, here's something we can do. Before four o'clock, we'll give out the answer. Jeez. You can discuss it in the car for the next 20 minutes, and we will give you the answer after the ad break. If we don't win a radio award this year, I don't know what else we can do. Is Ross listening to this?

I feel like this is- That's pay rise stuff right there. This is 30 combined years of radio experience paying dividend. It's really just coming to fruition. That is some solid stuff. But seriously, text them through. Yeah, text them through. I want to talk about if you're spontaneous in the bedroom.

And by that, I mean, I find this conversation fascinating. Are you spontaneous with the side of the bed you sleep on? Like with your partner? Is it not a thing? Like do you and your partner not have a side of the bed and do you just spontaneously pick it each night you and i have talked about this before and even then i think we found that it was extremely rare very rare everybody that we've talked to it just goes no that's not a thing and can we just say it's not a thing for us it's not a thing for us brie and i don't share a bed

first of all um but but if we did in the beds that we sleep on. You would sleep on the side I'd tell you to sleep on. Correct. Yeah, I knew it. Correct. Because I don't care. Yeah. So in my bed with my wife. What side?

We have sides. Yeah. She told me which side. No, but what side do you sleep on? I don't know left and right. Oh. I sleep on the right side. Yeah.

Yeah. Possibly same. I always, yeah, you probably do. I looked into it and did a bit of research into what is the percentage of people in a couple that are spontaneous with the sides of their bed. It's got to be low. What do you think it would be? How many couples?

I reckon less than one in 10 couples are spontaneous when it comes to choosing a side of the bed. So that'd be 10%. 10%. Okay. The results are in the percentage of people that are spontaneous when choosing a side to sleep on, 4%. Wow. Well, it says less than 4%, so somewhere between

3 and 4. 1 in 20. That's mental. Very low. I know a couple. I told you about them. I went to their wedding, and I didn't find out until their wedding that this is how they behave. Did you meet them in the honeymoon suite? You know what, it's time to name and shame them. Jamie and Josie, if you guys are listening. Jamie and Josie, are you guys

alright? What are you doing? Love you both dearly, but what is wrong with you? Jamie said, and actually Josie said the exact same thing. She goes yeah, whoever goes to bed first just chooses a side. That's no. That is a no from me.

Whoever gets into bed first just picks a side, and then whoever comes to bed second sleeps on the other side. I reckon that sealed the deal for them. When they met each other and they were, like, dating, as soon as they found that out about each other, you don't meet people like that very often. No, no, no. And he was probably like, I've got to lock this woman down.

You know what it means to me as well, that they don't have their own pillows. Yeah, but no, I don't think about that. They don't have their own bedside of the table, like bedside tables. Well, I guess as long as they're on the same phone, they can have two matching chargers. No, but I have all my knickknacks. What knickknacks are you? My Ventolin puffer.

But no, actually, you're right. Your book. Yeah, like your book. I put my earrings in a little dish. Your retainers. My retainers. You know, all that stuff. Yeah, your personal effects.

Yeah. Buzzy, eh? I thought we could ask. We can go on the hunt this afternoon. I feel like, you know, it's below 4%, but there's got to be some people out there. Is this you? Are you a spontaneous couple when it comes to choosing the side of the bed you sleep on?

You do not have a preferred or permanent side to the bed. You switch. You swap around. Who knows what could happen? How does it work? Bree and Clint. Let's go to the phones. Jade.

G'day, mate. Hi. How are you guys? Good, thanks. Is it you and your partner, Jade, that sleep on whatever side of the bed? Yes, it is. No, Jade. So, what happens is that

whenever I'm in like a stressed mood or something, I'm like a serial furniture rearranger. Okay. And it happens to always be every area of our house. My partner absolutely hates it. That's so stressful. A lot of the time.

It might be stress relief for you, but for me, who doesn't know where the TV is anymore, that's very stressful. Jade's like, I put it in the garage for a bit. He feels the same way, but we're a few years in now, so he just deals with it. But when it comes to our bedroom, I do the same thing. And I know I move it by the time he gets home from work, I've kind of picked

the side and we just kind of roll with that until I decide to move. But generally the rule is he would sleep on the side that's closest to the door. So, you know, he gets eaten by monsters first. So he can protect you in case there's an intruder. Yeah. I'm that person in my relationship. I'm always closest to the door. This poor guy, though.

Some days his feet are facing towards the door. Some days his head. Some days he doesn't know where he's going. Yeah. Jade, are you like this text? Because this buzzes me out. It says, me and my missus do this, but sometimes we will switch the end we sleep at

and put our feet at the headboard end. No, I haven't done that. Not quite there. I think that would tip them over the edge. Yeah, right. You don't want to go that far, do you, Jade? We've got another one. Claire's here.

Hi, Claire. Hi, Claire. Hi, how are you? Good, thanks. Are you one of these couples, Claire? We are, yes. You don't have a prearranged side of the bed? You guys just sleep on whatever side you want?

Yeah, so it sort of came about with pretty much since we moved in together, been pregnant, or we've now got a six-month-old and an 18-month-old. So for us, it depends who's on kid duty for the night and they sleep closest to the door so that they can get up easier. Yep. Or closer to the bed net. Yeah.

Yeah, so we swap. I'd hardly call that spontaneous, though, is it? It's more like a part of the shackles that you've been put in with young children that keep you locked in the house. Yeah, and I suppose I'd hardly call it sleeping. Yeah, exactly right. Let's be real, Claire. You haven't slept in four years.

No, not fully. Thanks, Claire. Someone said, I swapped sides with my partner about two years ago. We've been together for 23 years. Whoa. That would be such an interesting thing to do that far into the relationship.

That would be so weird. This person said they did it for their back scoliosis so that they could change up the position because they've been lying in the same position for 23 years. I totally get that because I've been getting pains in my shoulder because I'm a side sleeper sometimes and I've been sleeping, you know, I sleep towards the wall. Yeah. And so I've been thinking maybe we should switch sides. Also, variety is the spice of life.

So 23 years into the marriage, it'd be like, you know. Oh, yeah, crazy. Kinky. It's pretty much getting a red room. Stick with us. We will have the answer to the question on everybody's lips. What is the difference between a raisin and a sultana? Jeez.

We will have that for you. Play. ZM's Bree and Clint. We interrupt this broadcast to answer the question on everybody's lips. What is the difference between a raisin and a sultana? You know, I always thought I knew. I always thought it was different coloured grapes. It's not.

It's not? It is not. This is the answer you've all been waiting for. Okay. It's not. It's not? It is not. This is the answer you've all been waiting for. A raisin and a sultana are produced from the same grape, Thompson seedless grapes. The only difference is the way that they are dried. A raisin is dried naturally, but a sultana is dipped in veggie oil and acid and then dried. What? But the real question then is, what's a current?

Don't start on currents. My favourite non-Googled answer from somebody is to what's the difference between a raisin and a sultana? Somebody said one is like spicier. It is a spicier reason.

Brie and Clint. About to do a birthday banger for everyone stuck in traffic. We say that. I just checked the New Zealand Herald website, and there is a 40-kilometre traffic jam on Auckland's southern motorway at the moment. You've got to be joking. The traffic is at a standstill for 40 kilometres. No, don't laugh.

It's not funny. It's not funny. It's not funny. And now it's raining. And when it rains in Auckland, Aucklanders forget how to drive. What can we do to help this situation? I've got one idea. It's two words.

Birthday banger. All I want for my birthday is a birthday banger? Triple feature. Yeah. Just hold off on the triple feature, okay? We don't know what we've got yet. We don't know what we've got. So let's just see. Let's just see what we get first, guys.

Let's do our first birthday banger and go from there. We're going to start with Michael. G'day, Michael. G'day, Michael. Michael, you there? Yes, I'm here. Hello. There he is. Michael, you stuck you there? Yes, I'm here. Hello. There he is.

Michael, you stuck in traffic? Yep, stuck in traffic. Whereabouts, Michael, are you? Auckland CBD, just trying to get out of the city. Oh, you poor bugger. All right. Well, let's do your birthday banger, and we'll waste a bit of time doing that.

What's your birthday? 28th of March, 96. All right, Michael. That means you were 16 in 2012. And back on your 16th birthday, this would have been number one. It's Rees Mastin. Michael, you like a bit of Rees Mastin? Not really.

I thought it'd be Usher or something. Could have been. But no, it's Rhys Meston. That's wishful thinking there, I reckon, Michael. Okay, wait there. He's the Usher of Australia. Yeah, that's what everyone calls him. Jenny's here.

Hi, Jenny. Hi, Jenny. Hi. You stuck in traffic, Jenny? Oh, yeah, definitely. Oh, no. Whereabouts? Where are you?

Getting home to Ho Pi Kew Mew on the North Western. Oh, gutted, Jenny. Gutted for you. Well, let's get you there a bit quicker. What's your birthday? The 21st of February, 1984. All right. That means you were 16 in the year 2000.

And this had a number one hit. What a banger from Macy Gray. What a classic. What a classic. What an icon. A stone cold classic. And you definitely don't hear that song very often. You don't. And every time you hear it, what do you say?

Oh, I love this song. I love Maisie Gray. I wonder what she's up to. I wonder what she's doing. Okay. Good one, Jenny. Wait there, Jen. We're going to do one more for Courtney.

Hello, Courtney. Hello, Courtney. Hi. We're two from three stuck in traffic. Whereabouts are you? I'm at home, thankfully. Oh, lucky Courtney. Look at you go.

All right, well, let's do your birthday, Banger. What's your birthday? The 6th of April, 1987. All right, Courtney, you were 16 in 2003. And on your 16th birthday, this was at the top. I want to heal. I want to feel. Fire. I want to let go of the top. Fire.

Linkin Park. Somewhere I Belong. Oh, come on. You've got to love that, Courtney. Not my face. Not my face. Really? You went into the Meteora album?

No. No, okay. It's such a guilty pleasure for me, but I understand. I understand, Court. I really do. Wait there. We've got to deliberate between Macy Gray, Reese Mastin and Linkin Park.

Or do we need to deliberate? Triple play. Triple play. Triple play. Courtney play, triple play. Courtney, is it your birthday today? Yeah. Oh, sorry about that, Courtney. Happy birthday.

Happy birthday. Happy birthday. We didn't forget. Courtney, if you want a triple play, we'll do it for your birthday. Yeah, go on, do it. No, you don't want a triple play. You didn't even want your birthday bang to be played. She said we forgot her birthday and then to make up for it.

Let's start with one and see how we go. What would we pick out of the three? I feel like we all perked up when we heard that Macy Gray song. Yeah, I do love that song, eh? Producer Claude is ropeable. Oh, so is

Producer Ella. What do you guys want? Reese Matheson. Yes. want? Reece Matheson. Oh, yes. You both want Reece Matheson. Triple play, baby. I also love Linkin Park. I love Linkin Park. Yeah, I like the Linkin Park one too.

I also love Macy Gray. Where's the text machine? Where's the, come on. Yeah, what's happening on the text machine? Such a diverse range. Yeah, what do you guys want? Text us 9696. No, we're running out of time.

We're going to rock, paper, scissors this. No! You're Macy Gray. I'm Macy Gray. Claudia, you're Linkin Park. Okay. And I am Rhys Mastin. Are you ready?

That means Claude's going to lose on purpose. Three, two, one. One, two, three, shoot. Clint, Clint. Okay, it's between you and I. One, two, three, shoot. It's Rhys Mastin. Yes!

No one on the text machine has voted for Rhys Mastin. I'm a player anyway. You don't mess with rock, paper, scissors. Do we just achieve the worst outcome? Yes. A lot of text coming through for triple play. I mean, mull it over. Right?

I am the burrito champion. I am. I mean, did we get the time though? Respect me. When he finished the second one? You might have just been out of the time. I finished the second one after like 15 minutes. What are you talking about, woman? Once upon a time, there was a girl. She was smart, debatable, talented, eh, athletic.

Not really. But picking a movie title based on just the plot line, that she can do. Bree and Clint's What's the Plot? Today we're playing for $500 cash and all the movies are Mexican. I'm going to nail this. They're not, but we are playing for $500 cash. It's our movie guessing game.

And if you, Matthew, can get just two movie plots picked correctly before Bree does, you'll score that cash. Are you up for the job? Yeah, let's do it. Let's do it. All right. Good luck, Matthew. Good luck, Bree.

Thank you so much, Matthew. Sorry, I'm still a bit gassy from the burrito as well. Don't blame it on the burrito. Here's the rules. You buzz in with your name when you think you know the movie. You don't wait for me to finish the plot line. All right. Good luck, everybody.

Today, our real theme, seeing as the Barbie movie trailer dropped this week. The huge cast. Huge. Dua Lipa, Margot Robbie, Ryan Gosling, Will Ferrell, everybody. America Ferreira. Massive. We are doing movies with some of the most star-studded casts of all times. You could call them an ensemble cast.

You could call them an all-star cast. Or you could just call them big budget films. Okay? Okay. Good luck. Here comes movie number one. A single man who drinks too much. A father with three daughters who he rarely sees.

A guy who is overweight and unemployed. A hen-pecked house husband. A successful Hollywood agent married to a fashion designer. What do all of these five men have in common? They used to play for the same basketball team at school. I watched it literally last night. It's Grown Ups. Grown Ups is correct.

Oh! I can't believe that. Literally watched it before bed. Quite a good movie, yeah. Great film. Adam Sandler. Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider. David Spade.

David Spade. Salma Hayek. Huge cast. Maya Rudolph. Steve Busade. David Spade. Salma Hayek. Huge cast. Maya Rudolph. Steve Buscemi. Massive. Okay, Matt, you're going to need to get this next one, okay? Are you in it?

I'm in it. He's in it. Movie number two. Our hero is a man of action. Less than 24 hours into his parole from a New Jersey penitentiary this rock... Matt? Ocean's Eleven? Ocean's Eleven is correct. Oh, nice work, Matt.

Nice work, Matt. Very well done. Alright, movie number three. Star-studded cast. This is for the win. Whoever gets this takes out What's the Plot? And if it's Matt, he gets $500 cash. While shooting a war film,

the director attempts to liven up proceedings. Matt? Tropic Thunder? Tropic Thunder's correct. Haven't seen it. Would never have got it. Nice work, Matthew. $500 coming your way.

Awesome. Thank you, guys. Is that your first loss this year? Nah, I've lost before. You lost earlier this year. Yeah, I've lost a couple of times, but that was a good game and well-deserved win from Matt. Congratulations, Matt.

That'll see you right for the long weekend. Will do. Thank you so much, guys. Nice work. We will resume What's the Plot after Easter. Oh, we've got to start all over again. For a measly $50 cash. It's not about the cash, though. It's about the kudos, about the mana.

That's what it is about. It's all about that. I've found a bloody expensive cup of coffee today. How bloody expensive is it? All coffee's getting bloody expensive. Everything's getting bloody expensive. That's why I gave it up. You never drink it.

For 15 years, coffee was $4.50. And then all of a sudden they're like, oh yeah, we should really sort that out. Do something about that. Now it's like $5, $6, $7. You can pay $7 for an oat milk flat white. I honestly have saved my household so much money by buying an actual coffee machine. Yeah.

Oh, it's the best thing I ever bought my partner. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, it saves so much money. An espresso and a keep cup, takeaway cup, especially the keep cups that look like a cafe cup. Life hack. Yeah. Anyway, this is not that.

This is the opposite of that. The Emirates Palace in Abu Dhabi is currently selling a $34 cappuccino. $34? Yeah. Is there vodka in it? Is it a coffee cocktail? What is it? It's weird to me because it's not ludicrously expensive,

but it's also not affordable. Are you joking? It is ludicrous. No, no, no. Ludicrously? Ludicrously expensive, but it's also not affordable. Are you joking? It is ludicrous. No, no, no. Ludicrously? Ludicrously. Ludicrously? Ludicrously expensive.

It's a coffee. No, it is, but it's also in Abu Dhabi. I don't care if it's in Dubai or Abu Dhabi. The rooms in the hotel, they start at $2,100 a night. They come with a 24-hour butler service when you book a room in the hotel, they start at $2,100 a night. They come with a 24-hour butler service when you book a room in the hotel. That's fun. So the coffee is cheap by comparison.

That is out the gate. Like an espresso martini is expensive. Yeah. Are you sure it's not an espresso martini? It's a cappuccino with some chocolate syrup on top. So no alcohol in it? No alcohol, but they do put gold leaf on top of it. Can they put alcohol in it? No, they put 23 karat gold leaf on it.

I'd rather the alcohol. I don't understand rich people who want to put gold inside their body. It tastes like nothing. It tastes like nothing? It literally tastes like nothing. And does it make your poos go gold? It's like Salt Bae's restaurant, and they cover all their Wagyu beef in gold leaf. Yeah, why?

Wagyu beef in gold leaf. Rhymes. It's not the most expensive coffee in the world, though. I've Googled that. The most expensive coffee in the world is Black Ivory Coffee in Thailand. It costs $1,500 a pound, not a cup, but for a pound of coffee beans. Okay. The coffee cherries are fed to elephants where they are partially fermented

during the digestion process. Later, the beans are collected from the elephant's feces before being roasted and brewed. That's a thing in Bali too. There's a certain type of animals where- Monkeys. Yeah. Tree monkeys or something.

Yeah, it's a certain type of animal and they eat the coffee beans. They make them eat them and then they poo them out and then you get the poo and you brew the poo. And it's like a really nice cup of coffee. It's meant to be really nice. And I was like, I'll pass, I think. Is there a business opportunity for us to eat some coffee beans? Do you want me

to eat it? And then we pay someone, like, to sift through it and get out the coffee beans and have like a brie brew. Yeah, and a Clint brew. And, you know, we could start our own cafe

and instead of calling it cold drip, we just call it cold shit. I think we're onto something. Bree and Clint. Look, I feel like the long, long weekend, you're either going away, you're having a good time, having a break or you're probably going to be at home and maybe doing a bit of an autumn clean-out. Oh, no.

I thought you were going to say staycation. Autumn clean-out. That doesn't. I thought you were going to say staycation. Autumn clean-out. That doesn't sound fun. People like to do that. It's sometimes good to do it over a long, long weekend, and then you've got other days where you can relax and not do anything. Yeah, okay. I saw this article, which might help you out.

It's from the Queen of Clean, she calls herself. Her name is Lindsay Crombie. Is she the TikTok lady? Yesiktok lady yes i love her she's amazing um and i feel like she's really practical super practical and a lot of the stuff she talks about i i never knew so that's why i like she also says things like this doesn't need to be as clean as you think it does yeah she's like don't put your baking don't put your wooden spoons in baking soda yeah don't do it So interesting you say that because this one is more like some hard truths about items in the house that we all have that she says you probably

should be replacing more often than what we are. Okay, interesting. All right, so it's a list of eight things. And let's just go through the list. Producers, you can join in on this and everyone listening and just tick off which ones you think you are replacing within the allocated time of what she thinks is right. Or if we have ever replaced this thing.

Or that too. Okay, let's kick it off with towels. Bath towels? Bath towels. She says you should be replacing towels every two years. Oh. Like throwing them out and getting new ones. That's correct.

Oh. No. Because I do not do that. Never. That's a no from all of us. No from all of us. Yeah, same. That seems wasteful.

It does. She says the bacteria, though, that can breed. I mean, which towels would be a breeding ground? We said no, thank you. All right, number two, bed sheets. Queen of Clean says you should be replacing bed sheets every two years as well. What?

Yeah, I don't think I've, like... I think, like, of going and visiting my nan when I was a kid and the same sheets that were on the bed were there for my entire childhood. But you're not sleeping in them every night so then it prolongs the life. No, but I feel like my parents probably slept in them. I've got sheets that have holes in them from like where I've worn them out. Oh, what are you doing on your sheets?

Farts. Oh, right. Okay. I'm just kidding. No, I don't replace every two years. No. That's a no from all of us. No.

And Ella's mum buys her sheets, so no. I bought my sheets, thank you. At Briscoe's on Sunday. Did you get the My Little Pony ones I showed you? Yes. I thought so. This one blew my mind and it's quite gross and I have not done this. Toilet brushes.

Oh, okay. Should be replaced every six months. What? Interesting. No. Do you guys do that? So when we moved into our new house, they've got those toilet roll,

toilet brush holders that are fixed to the wall. Yeah. And so it came with toilet brushes. Gross. And my wife went, that's disgusting. We're not using someone else's toilet brushes. Do you know how hard it is to just buy the brush?

Yeah, I bet. If you don't want to replace the entire mount that's fixed to the wall, it's nowhere sells just the brush. You can buy them online. Buy, I bet. If you don't want to replace the entire mount that sticks to the wall, nowhere sells just the brush. You can buy them online. Buy them in bulk. I bought them bulk off AliExpress and I had a huge sack of toilet brush heads arrive.

Wrong size. Oh, no. I've got 24 toilet brush heads that don't fit. Oh, no. Not ideal. So every six months for a toilet brush. Toothbrush is every six months for a toilet brush. Toothbrush is every six months. Yeah. Which I feel like that seems like a little bit long.

Yeah, yeah. I'd probably replace it more often than that. I would aim for three to four months. Three to four months I think is good. Pillows, she says if you take care of them and wash them twice a year. Excuse me? Yeah, you should be washing your pillows. Two years?

How do you wash a pillow? They can last up to five years if you wash them twice a year. Excuse me? Yeah. You should be washing your pillows. How? How do you wash a pillow? They can last up to five years if you wash them twice a year. Wow, okay. Yeah, and look after them. Washing up sponge. How often should that be replaced? Weekly. They're gross. Weekly? They're disgusting. No, not washed.

Not washed. Replaced. They're gross. Nah, they go through the washing machine, hot wash. Fine, a month. Yeah, monthly. Threeplace. Get out. They're gross. No, they go through the washing machine, hot wash. Fine, a month. Yeah, monthly. Three months. A month. Really?

Yeah, one month for the washing up sponge. We've got two more. Chopping boards. How often should you be replacing chopping boards? Never in my life have done that. You've never replaced your chopping board? I'd buy another one and add it to the supply. I relate to that. Have you got wood ones?

I've got so many fricking chopping boards. I have two wood ones and one plastic one. So she says a wood chopping board can last up to five years but if they have a crack in them they need to be thrown away. Fascinating. Because mould and bacteria and stuff grows in the cracks and it can make you sick.

Yeah, so throw it out. Last one on the list, things you should be replacing more often, wooden spoons. Right. How often do you think? I don't think I've ever chucked out a wooden spoon. Never? I feel like a wooden spoon is for life.

Two years is the shelf life. She said they get wet and bacteria can grow and then you're stirring your soups with it. What if your wife puts your wooden spoons in the dishwasher and they're all like... That's straight away. Bree and Clint. I told you before that a family has found an item in their house that they thought was worthless.

Turns out it's worth megabucks. What is it? Because I'm going to go home and look for it. It's a painting. I don't own paintings. Yeah. Like, you know, is it one of those paintings? Because I remember growing up like at my nan's house or my nonna's house

and they always had these old random paintings and they were in their house their entire life. I always wondered, I was like I wonder where that's from. That's what this is. That kind of thing. Okay, so a French family has been left dumbfounded after the painting that they've had hanging

on the wall forever forever, for generations turns out it's worth heaps. It was a picture by an artist called Peter Brueghiel sorry to our arts community but I don't know who that is. He was a 17th century Flemish artist.

But they all believe that, they're like, oh, yeah, that's a Peter Brueghel. Yeah. Oh, I know a Peter Brueghel when I see it. They're like, it's a knockoff. They're like, it's not real. Right. It's not real. It's a print.

They know who the artist is, but it's not real. And back in the day, you used to get recreations. Before they could do prints, someone would paint a painting of a painting and then you could buy the recreation, knowing that it was not necessarily a fake, but a fake. But a fake. A version of it. It had been in their family since the late 1800s.

Jeez. Yeah, it had gone from family member to family member, from house to house, passed down to younger generations. And it was kind of just like this thing. That got passed down. It's a family heirloom. They all thought it was a fake. But someone who knew what they were talking about has been to their house

and said, no, I think that's real. I think everything I know about this artist, I have a strong feeling that this is real. You should send it to these people and get them to look at it and they can just tell you once and for all they'll send it back but they'll tell you once and for all whether yeah it's a fake like you think it is or if it's real well they sent away it's real and people stole it no oh they put it up for auction just sold for 1.3 million. Holy smokes. $1.3 million. Family heirloom.

They're like, shit. Imagine if you were the sibling when Nan was packing up her house and heading off to the rest home and she's like, do you want the broogie? And you're like, yuck, Nan. I don't want that dusty old piece of shit. I'll put it up in my crappy office then, I guess. And then you're the grandkid who's like, yeah, Nan, I'll take that.

$1.3 million. So the moral of the story is, I know that might sound crazy and unachievable. It's not. Visit your grandparents this weekend. Tell them how much you like all of their art. Get in the will. Doesn't matter how shitty the painting is. Doesn't matter if it's just a picture of sunflowers.

Get on the will because that thing could be your ticket out of this place. Yeah, see, I just don't think the one hanging up in my nan's family home is worth anything. Why? Because it's a nude painting of my nan. I'll give you 50 bucks for it. Sold! That's the end of the show and the beginning of the long weekend. The traffic is so bad, let's all go to the pub and we'll wait it out.

Let's go to the pub and wait it out. Let's go to the pub and wait it out. Producer Ellis Kane. Producer Claude Kane. We're going to the pub to wait it out. Guess what everyone's doing up at the pub? Waiting it out. Is it really?

There's a lot of people waiting it out. Have you just come from the pub where everyone's waiting it out? Waiting it out. No way. Oh, great idea. We're coming to the pub to wait it out. Wait for us. Oh, but the annoying part is you can only have one drink.

Yeah, I know. Because then you have to drive home. Yeah, well, is you can only have one drink. Yeah, I know. Because then you have to drive home. Yeah, well, then you can get an Uber. You're going to have to really wait it out then. Get an Uber. Have an excellent long weekend, everybody. Be safe. Be safe.

On the roads, especially. Yes. That's the main thing. And from the COVIDs. That's what everyone here at ZM is trying to avoid. Trying to avoid the COVIDs and do the speed limits. Why are we still getting COVID? Yeah, we're over you, COVID.

2023, grow the hell up, COVID. Is that enough? I think we all just start. COVID's from last decade. When does the testing stop? When does COVID stop? I'm so sick of putting the little thing into my nose. And it hurts.

And then a boogie comes out on it and it's gross. You've got to do it though. Do your bit. But enjoy yourself. I am doing it but I don't like it. Not you, I meant the greater you. Okay, everybody listening. Felt like it was aimed at me. Right, we need a break you guys need a break happy long long weekend have a good easter bye see you on tuesday

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