ZM's Bree & Clint - ZM's Bree & Clint Podcast – August 1st 2018

Episode Date: August 1, 2018

Free Flow Friday locationsClint think he knows the Secret SoundWhat’s your best break up advice?Birthday BangerHow cheap is your mate?Can Ross Boss judge the pie awards?#GirlProblemsThe truth about Instagram discoveryBree’s apartment failStolen sharkSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Brie and Clint on ZDM. Kia ora New Zealand. Welcome to the show, 4 o'clock, Brie and Clint. Hi Brie. Hello mate. You recovered from our large lunch yet? I actually surprisingly am feeling okay. We had a buffet lunch. Five courses later for myself.

Yeah, you had five courses. I didn't even undo my pants. No. That's a win for me, mate. You sound like it's some kind of achievement. It is. Today on the show, of course, we are attacking the secret sound again. At 5pm, there are 29 days

left to guess. I don't want to get people too excited, but I think, perhaps, and this is no build-ups, I think I may have figured out what it is. The secret sound. I love that you think you have and then I also think I have. Well, I have audio of mine. Right. I have an audio case to present to the people at 4.20. Now, obviously, I'm not allowed to guess, so I can't run it by

Annabelle and say, have I got it correct? But I can give it to you. And if you think it's close enough, then you're welcome to use my guess at 5pm. Are you catching on with what I'm saying here, Bree? I'm catching on. I love that if someone does that and then it's not it and they waste their guess. Yeah, well, no. But that's the risk you take.

But what if they do do it and they get it? How much money do they owe me? Nothing. No, that's completely up to you. We'll go on good faith if you do get it. I'll give you what my secret sound guess is at 4.20 this afternoon. Up next, though, we've got all the details you'll need to know about our Free Flow Friday.

That's right, we're giving away tampons, people. We'll give you those details after, Lord. Bree and Clint, ZM. ZM's Bree and Clint. Mate, in a radio world first this Friday, we're dishing out tampons in Free Flow Friday. Because I'm free. Free flowing.

Bree and Clint's Free Flow Friday. You know, I originally hated the name. But you love it now? I love it. It's, I originally hated the name. But you love it now? I love it. It's so good. It's fantastic. So literally this Friday in a Radio World First, we don't know if that's true, but we're saying it is,

we want to fight period poverty in this country and we've organised with the help of a very amazing Kiwi branded company, OI, the Organic Initiative. They've come on board, they've given us the tampons, and we're now going to have multiple stations around New Zealand to give out these tampons. This is out of the blue, by the way. This is just, you saw an article.

We talked about it. They came on board and said, here's how much we can give you guys to give away. No one's making any money out of this. No, this is all organised by us here at this show. So those guys who are coming out of their own pocket at OI, that's massive. Thank you. Huge. And they're such a great company who are willing to come on board and

try and make a small difference. But you know, everything helps. Big difference to some people. Massive difference to some people. So, the information you need if you want to jump on board, we've got five locations around New Zealand where our Black Thunders are going to be dishing out tampons.

Well, boxes of. Boxes of tampons. Not individuals. Not singles. We're not that stingy. We're going to dish out boxes. We'd give them to more people if we did them in singles, but no, we will treat you to a whole pack.

So Friday, this Friday, at 4.30 it's going to kick off. In Auckland at Countdown Manukau, Hamilton, Kmart, Te Rapa Strait, Wellington, Cuba Street, Christchurch, the Crossing CBD Centre and Dunedin, the Museum Reserve. Now, there's something else we're doing with this too, which is important. Because we thought, you know, obviously we want them to go to people who really need them and of course people who are listening as well. And we thought we'd dish out half at those locations where you can go and get your free tampons,

but we're also, half of the tampons that Oi have given us are going to be dropped at all the local women's refuge places at each region. Because that's kind of the best way we thought of being able to get them to people who can't come down or wouldn't come down or maybe aren't listening or whatever. We'll put them in the hands of that service, the Women's Refuge Service.

Which is so amazing. Yeah, and they'll know where they need to go. Yeah, because that's something, you know, an item that women's refuges, you know, they get a lot of food and this and that, but that's something that women need. And we thought let's provide that and take a bit of the pressure off. So this Friday, 4.30, one more time,

this is where you can go and find the thunders and get your free temples. In Auckland, it's Countdown in Manukau. Hamilton, it's Kmart Tirapa Street. Wellington, it's Cuba Street. Christchurch, it's the Crossing CBD Centre and Dunedin Museum Reserve. The details are

at zmonline.com if you missed those. One more time. Come on. Because I'm missed those. One more time. Come on. Sing it with us. Feels good, mate. ZM's Bree and Clint. Of course, Secret Sound's on at the moment.

Thanks to Save My Bacon, the jackpot currently at $20,000. Soundkeeper Annabelle is in this time. She's created the sound, and if you can guess it, in the next 29 days, you take 20 grand, maybe even 50 grand when it jackpots. So it's all different this time,

because obviously we used to have Soundkeeper Gary, but Annabelle was just someone who decided she'd make her own sound and submit it, and here she is. I never worked here when Soundkeeper Gary was doing it. Oh, it's a punish. I have also never been a part of a secret sound before, so I don't know the rules. It's a big operation.

Yeah, I understand that, and there's a lot of secrecy. However, I feel like as a show, we're on the people's side, and we want to give people as much chance as possible to win it. Is that fair to say? I love being about the people. Yeah. I think I might have figured out what it is. The sound.

Yeah. I've said from the start that the secret sound, this secret sound right here, sounds to me like it's spring-loaded. Yeah, I think so too. That there's some kind of mechanism in it. Like it's something that you're pushing and then it's springing back.

And then it comes back. And we've heard that. We've heard that in people guessing car door, airplane baggage latch, gear shift. Those things are all spring loaded. Yep. I have found an item around my home. Okay. Again.

Was it when you were using this thing and then thought, hmm, that sounds similar? It was when it was being used. Okay. Now I'm going to give it to you. I'm going to give you what my guess is. We're not allowed to guess, obviously. We're not allowed to put a guess to Annabelle. But if you're listening right now and you want to take Clint's guess. It's yours. You can do that. I can't win it. I work for the company. I can't win it. So someone might as well have it.

This is the sound here. This is the secret sound. And this is the sound of the item around my home, may well be in your home as well, which I believe sounds remarkably similar. Okay, give it to me. That doesn't sound similar at all. Do you know what it is? Go again.

Is it the doorstop? Close. It's the cat door. Cat door. Right. Now you don't think it sounds that, I can see it in your face, you don't think it sounds that similar. What about when I speed it up a little bit? Now one more time. Secret sound. Cat door.

Slightly sped up. Secret sound. Cat door. No, this is closer than you're giving Slightly sped up Side by side, side by side Here you go, side by side comparison Mate, I love to be supportive of you

Now, so we're clear No, no, no, listen to me Don't laugh You're losing me No, no, no, no The guess is not I'm not telling you at five o'clock to call up and go Now, so we're clear. No, no, no, listen to me. Listen to me. Don't laugh. You're losing me. No, no, no, no. The guess is not, I'm not telling you at five o'clock to call up and go,

is the secret sound Clint's cat door? Okay? I'm suggesting it could be a cat door. Okay? Yeah, no, I got that. Everyone's cat door operates differently. I'm saying it is similar enough that if you said cat door today, it might be worth $20,000.

Mate, still not similar. Zinni is Bree and Clint. We were having lunch today, you and I, Bree, and Bree picks up her phone and she goes, ooh, I've got a notification from Breakup Boss. And then I said, do you guys want to know what it is? And I said, no, we need to talk about this on the radio. So first of all, before you tell us what the notification was,

what's Breakup Boss? So Breakup Boss is an app that you can download on your phone and it helps you through a breakup, okay? Which you've just been through. Yeah, recently. Well, recent-ish. We're talking two months now. Yes.

Verging on two months. But I downloaded this just after. So I was literally struggling. Yeah. Oh, and you were struggling too. You were on Struggle Street. I was struggling massively. And I was like, I need to do something.

I was doing everything I could. And so I downloaded it. And you do after a breakup too. Yeah. You're like, what's going to make it better? Is it a new hairdo? Is it a CrossFit membership? Is it a leather jacket?

Is it that guy? I don't know. So it's an app that helps you through a leather jacket? Is it that guy? I don't know. So it's an app that helps you through a breakup. How does it do that? So it does a few things. It actually sends you these things called pep peps. Pep peps. Pep peps.

And it's just a little like reminder, just a little thing that it'll send you every day where you might, you know, not even be thinking about it, but it'll send something that kind of helps you through it. That's nice. Yeah. Like a little quote or- Is that what you got at lunch today?

Yes. Can we have what it is? So today my pep pep was happy relationship memories use way stronger glue than bad memories. Make sure you are truthfully assessing your relationship when you start to wish for it again. K, thanks, bye. Ooh, that's deep. So essentially it's saying you remember all the good things. But you don't, but you're not thinking about the...

The bad things. Right, okay. I got you. But it's got like a lot of uplifting stuff. Yeah. Which, you know. Is it a dating app too? Like does it help you get back on the horse?

No. So to speak? No. You can't link it into your Tinder and no, it's not Bumble enabled. No, that's fine. What was the name of the app? Breakup Boss. Good.

Do you want some more advice? Oh no, here we go. Just, you know, if you're still using the app and you still need it, totally fine. But if you need some more advice, there are a lot of- And let me guess, you're going to use our radio platform to get it. Albrey, there are a lot of wise, insightful, inspiring people listening to this show right now.

Well, a few of them at least anyway. And they all have advice and everyone's been through a breakup and maybe they have something that can help you. Yeah, well, you know what? Actually, I wouldn't mind it because I'm still, you know, not quite there. Yeah. Okay. Okay, good. So I'm open to it, mate. 0800 dial ZM. No joke.

Well, maybe you got a funny one, I don't know. 0800 dial ZM or 9696 in the text. What's your breakup advice? What's your best advice for someone who's just been through a breakup? Share it with the people this afternoon. Yeah, come on. Help someone out. Group therapy. And I'll enjoy it as well. Z is Brie and Clint.

We're involved in a bit of group therapy at the moment. I found out today that Brie is using an app called Breakup Boss to help get over her last relationship, which is good. And I'm supporting you in it. I'm not making fun of you. Don't think that. No, I don't think that. I didn't realise you had to pay for the app, though.

Yeah, it's a one-off payment. And to be honest, mate, at the point when I bought the app, I was willing to do anything. Right. Because I was in a place that wasn't great. How much are we talking? $9.99. That's not bad. If it's one off it's not bad. It's a one off. What we're going to do though

is we're going to get some free advice for you and for the people. Excellent. Just setting some nice therapy music and the question for you on 0800DALZM is what is your best breakup advice? This music is so soothing. I know.

Do you feel comfortable? Do you feel safe? Not really because we're on live radio discussing my breakup. Maybe close your eyes. Okay. Bree, this is from the text machine. It's called a breakup because it's broken. An ex is an ex for a reason.

Enlightening. Good, okay. Bree, go and stay with your mum for a year. She will get you through it. A year? Poor mum. Every time you have a breakup, you're moving back in. My poor mother.

She just got rid of you. Bree, get back on the dating horse. Remind yourself how awesome you are. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, that's good. 0800 dial ZM. Lorna, hello. Hi.

Hi, Lorna. Share with us your best breakup advice. Well, Bree, when I said I'd write it for my husband, I was teetering on the edge for a little while and one of my friends told me that getting back with your ex is like trying to shove a poo back up your bum. Oh my God. And we all know, Lorna, that is very difficult. It is very difficult.

And messy. Am I right? Absolutely. When they were in there, they fit. And now that they're out. You've made my day. That is great. That was a rip up. Sophie, hello

and welcome to Group Therapy. Please share with Bree and New Zealand your best breakup advice. Doing something for yourself. After a breakup I signed up for a half marathon because one of my goals was to run over the

Auckland Harbour Bridge. That's a lot of work. Would you also say doing something for yourself is buying a very expensive leather jacket for myself? That's also a good option. Excellent. The nice thing about signing up for half marathon, I'd never run more than probably 5K in my life. But every time you had a bad week, you'd always achieve something for yourself. signing up for half marathon. I'd never run more than probably 5k in my life. But every time you had a bad week,

you'd always achieve something for yourself. Yeah, that's nice. You did all your runs. And you're super hot at the end of it because you've got a marathon body. Yeah, exactly. But also, every time you're out there training, in the rain, in the wind, when you're exhausted, you're just going, oh, that bastard boyfriend.

I'm not built to run. I'm a talker, not a walker, so to speak. Sophie, thank you very much. Thanks, Sophie. Appreciate that. One more bit of breakup advice for you. This comes from Shiloh. Hello, Shiloh. Hi. Hey, guys. How are you? Good, thanks. Man advice. Man advice. Well, no, actually it's woman

advice, but it's going to come from a man. Love a man. Here we go. Love a man giving woman advice. Yeah. Okay, well, from what I've heard from girlfriends of mine, apparently, the best way to get over a guy is to get under another one. And this has all come from women that you've broken up with, Shiloh.

No, no, just friends of mine. I haven't actually taken the advice myself as of yet. I don't know if it actually works both ways. Yeah, yeah. It's essentially rebounding, yeah. I find it very hard to lift them, though, to get under. Shiloh, have you recently had a breakup? Recent-ish, yeah.

No, Clint, no. Why not? Don't I know exactly what you're going to do. Shiloh. Here we go. Shiloh, birds of a feather. We're losing you. And there's something about shared trauma too.

I wish I knew which button it was to play the song. I'm pretty sure I swiped left at Australian. Hey, never say never. Well, this just got a whole lot worse, didn't it? Shiloh, thank you. Thank you very much. Give him a go. It was going very much. Give him a go. It was going so well.

Give him a go. It was going so well. Go on a date with Shiloh. All right. Don't force it. Bree and Clint, we are going to do birthday banger next. Yeah, so if you've got a birthday, sorry, I'm really thrown at the moment. Oh, getting absolutely rejected on the radio.

Loved it. Call us now and we will figure out what song was number one on your 16th birthday. ZM's Bree and Clint. It's my birthday. It's my birthday. Bree and Clint's Birthday Banger. That's right. We get your birthdays just to mess with the music here at ZM.

We figure out what song was top of the charts on your 16th birthday and then we pick our favourite one to play. Lisa, welcome to Birthday Banger. Hello, mate. G'day. What's your birthday, Lisa? 8th of December, 1983. Okay, Lisa, you were 16 in 1999 on the 8th of December and this is your Birthday Banger.

We were all terrified about the Y2K bug, and this weird computer animated dude was on TV. Blue, Eiffel 65. It's a banger. You like that, Lisa? It's perfect because blue is my favourite colour. Oh. It gets better and better. I love that song.

It's custom made. Ben, hi, welcome to Birthday Banger. Hi, Ben. Hey, mate. What's your birthday? 4th of October, 98. Okay, Ben, you were 16 in 2014 on the 4th of October and this was Top of the Charts.

Because you know I'm all about that bass. Oh, yeah. Megan Trainor. Oh, hey. Met her. Absolutely lovely. She is. Was she?

Yeah, she's absolutely lovely. Do you want to pick up that celebrity name you just dropped? Oh, okay. I'm just joking, man. I've heard she's really nice. Do you want to pick up that celebrity name you just dropped? Oh, okay. I'm just joking. I've heard she's really nice. Do you like that one, Ben? I'll put him on hold. Oh, no.

I think he does. I think he was disappointed. No, I think he was disappointed. Kelly, hello. Hello, Kelly. Kelly. Kelly. Yellow Kelly.

Kelly, don't make us go back to Ben. Hello. There she is. Yellow. What's your birthday, Kel? 28th of December, 94. Okay, Kelly, you were 16 in 2010 on the 29th of December, and on that day, this was top of the charts.

Maybe you're a boy, you were. Oh, boom, boom, boom. Katy Perry. Maybe go out, out, out. This is the one with the line about feeling like a plastic bag, eh? Hey, still a banger, mate. You know a song is amazing if there's a line like that and it can still go platinum.

What do we want to hear? We want to hear I-465, Meghan Trainor or Katy Perry. Didn't think I would be into Katy Perry so much, but you can't go past Blue. Are you kidding? Oh, thank you. I was like, I thought you were about to go. All right, mate, chill.

We can play Meghan Trainor another day, all right? No, no, no, I'm with you. You bestie. Here we go. This, Lisa, is your birthday banger. Yes, Lisa. Hey! Hey!

What are we doing? Here you go. Bree and Clint, ZDM, Secret Sounds up next. ZM, Bree and Clint. It's the winner of Birthday Banger from Eiffel 65, number one in the year 1999. What a good year. It's good text.

What a banger. What a way to finish a working day on Wednesday. Cheers. ZM's Bree and Clint. What a good year. That's good text. What a banger. What a way to finish a working day on Wednesday. Cheer. ZDM's Brian Clint. From $20,000 to people who don't want to spend any money at all, you know when you've got that friend in your friend group who's just known as the cheap one? Yeah, the stingy one.

The tight one. The one who doesn't, who has money or is on the same sort of rung of the financial ladder as you, doesn't want to spend it. There's a difference, can I say, from being stingy or cheap to being poor. 100%. So different.

100%. You're talking about someone who's just in your age group. Maybe they don't have any dependents. We're all in the same boat. Yeah. But for some reason, they are going the extra mile just to really not spend a cent. Just to save a buck.

I caught up with a friend last night who I've known for ages and he's always been that person in our group. He's always been the cheap one. There's always one. But I think he's got worse. I think he's really, as he's got older, he's really leaned into it. He said to me, and he's quite proud of it too,

as if it's a life hack. He said, mate, you know what I don't it too, as if it's a life hack. He said, mate, you know what I don't have in my house anymore? I said, what? He goes, phone chargers. Why? His phone charger is now on his desk at work. The reason being, he doesn't pay for the power at work. So he decides to charge his phone at work. So the company is paying for it. And in his eyes, bada bing, bada boom, that's like a pay rise. Wow.

If his phone goes flat at home. That is next level. Should his phone die at home? He goes, well, too bad. I used it too much. I have to wait till I go back to work tomorrow to charge it. Can I ask, is this friend of yours in a relationship? No. Oh, not surprising.

Whoa! He charges his laptop at work as well. I don't know what other devices he would have. If he had an iPad, he'd probably charge it there, but I doubt he has an iPad because I don't think he'd want to spend the money on one. Too expensive. Not worth it. But you know those people. And they take pride in it too.

Maybe they only drink the work coffee. Yep. Maybe they only- They only have coffee at work and it has to be instant. Yeah. Maybe they've trained themselves so well that they only go number twos when they're at work so they use work toilet paper. Actually, I have stolen toilet paper from work at one point in my life.

Not here. They're locked here. How did you get it out? There's ways. I actually, I was telling you off air, one of my mates, oh, she was good. She was so sneaky and so like conniving about it. Yeah. I remember we were out on a night out once and we were, I was standing at the bar and she was known within our friendship group. Like, you know how you buy the group around? Yeah. And then obviously it's your turn and then it's the next person's turn.

She would never, never buy around. She would always strategically put herself at the end. But this one night, and you always try to stay away from her when you're at the bar because you'd end up buying her a drink. Yeah. And so one night I was standing at the bar and I was buying my mate, Tennille, a drink. And I was like, what do you want?

She's like, I'll have this. And then all of a sudden my other friend pops up. She goes, oh, the line's really long. Can you just get me this drink? And I was like, actually she said, can you order me this drink? Yeah. So I ordered it and we were chatting and I was having a good conversation with her. Literally as the bartender walked over, put the drinks on the counter,

she goes, that'll be this much. I've turned nowhere to be seen. She's gone. She literally smoke bombed. Yeah. As I've tapped my card to pay, boom, there she is, grabbed the drink. She wants to hang out with you. She doesn't want to pay.

Good from you. Good from you. That's ninja level. That is stinginess level expert. That is cheap ninja level. Call hang out with you. She doesn't want to pay. Good from you. That's ninja level. That is stinginess level expert. That is cheap ninja level. Call them out this afternoon. You know, let's really put a name to them. You don't have to use their last name if you think that's offensive,

but you're welcome to. If you want to give out their address. Oh, 800-DIAL-ZM. You can text them in to us on 9696 as well. We will read them out. Our question for you this afternoon, how cheap is your mate and who are they? Zee, Ian's brilliant Clint. We're asking the question this afternoon.

Are you ready for this? I'm ready. This is our question. How cheap is your mate? Cheap is your mate. How cheap is your mate? We really want to know. Sorry, that's something we just came up with just then.

How cheap is your mate? I've got a mate who's only charging his iPhone at work. You know, I've done the sums on it. I've figured out how much it costs you to charge your iPhone at home. Oh, here we go. This is based off the US price for power, but I've converted it to New Zealand dollars. And how much is he saving?

To charge your iPhone, the amount of power it is drawing out of your house per year is just over a dollar. Oh my God. So your opportunity this afternoon to dob in the cheap person in your friend group. I like how in the break you said that toilet paper couldn't be stolen

from our workplace. Yeah, look at you. And I literally went to the bathroom and here's my toilet roll. Well done. I'll be taking that home tonight. You've just said that on the radio and you're on camera, but yeah, well done. We've got some great calls. We're just about to go to the phones, but just quickly, someone's texted in and said, my mate is so tight that when we go to the snow and

we're driving in his car, he charges the occupants for fuel. That's to be expected. But then he also hits us up for wear and tear on the engine, tyres and oil. So he calculates... Why? Why? My nan.

Oh, cheap nan. My nan will return grocery items if a competitor has a couple of cents off so that she can go and buy it from the other place and save the money. That's different though because that's a pensioner. Yeah. Different. But I always go cost over effort. Yeah, that's true.

As their gas involved, someone said, oh my God, I dated a guy who was like this and I couldn't do it anymore. We would go to KFC and in the drive-through, he would say, hi, can we please make two separate orders? Even though I had paid for the previous date. Whoa. Oh, 800 dial ZM.

I mean, KFC, not the most expensive outing, you know? No, there's the other bit too. Treat yourself. Oh, $800. Cora. Hello, Cora. How cheap is your mate? Hey, guys.

How cheap? How cheap are they, Cora? Oh, my God. Okay, so it's not even my mate. It's my sister. Oh, no. We've not spoken since Christmas. She is so cheap and tight that rather than actually

turn up to functions, like family functions, holidays, birthdays, things like that, she'll start an argument so she doesn't have to, like, buy anyone any presents, any cards. Oh, my God. We've not spoken since Christmas because we had the same lights on our house. She would rather

be in a fight with you. Tell me, like, oh, you know, you're no good. I'm super positive now. You're being too negative for my life. And then as soon as like Christmas is done, like Boxing Day, she'll call us up like, hey, want to hang out? Cora, you know it's August.

Yeah. Do you live in the same place? No, thank God. But see, that's the thing, like, because she's over in Aussie and we're here in New Zealand, we will fork out for the flight, pay for our accommodations and all that. When it's her, she's like, nah. Mate, over in Aussie, she'll fit right in.

That's expert. Junior, kia ora. Oh no, Junior's gone. That's okay. Roma. Hi, Roma. Hello, Roma. Hi, how are you? How cheap are they? Well, my mum, it's not necessarily cheap. She's kind of conniving. Every time we'd go to a restaurant or something like that,

if our meal was, you know, like a little bit more expensive or something like that, she'd take a steak knife or take a wine glass or something like that to try and counteract the difference on the meal. That's not cheap. That's criminal. Yeah, that's theft. It was the same with my auntie, though.

We were having my birthday last year, and I got into the car, and they both pulled out the exact same wine glass and looked at each other like, ha, ha, ha. And you're like, oh, my God. It's a family trait. Oh, my God. It's hereditary. Roma, you know your next day.

You know you're going to get to the tipping point. My ticket discount is going to happen. Yeah, you're going to be at Valentine's sticking those little packets of butter in your handbag. Watch out. Hell yeah. Speaking of restaurants, and we said you're welcome to name them today, by the way.

Someone's texted and said, my mate Sam took a first date out for dinner. He took her to Breakers. Okay. Only took her there as he had a supermarket checkout voucher for two for one. Oh, mate.

First and only date. And he's loaded as well. Oh, that makes it even worse. Yeah, but you know what rich people say too. They go, well, I didn't get rich. There's a reason I'm rich. I didn't get rich by wasting my money, did I? Mate, my uncle, who's a multi-millionaire,

my dad's older brother, he gave us for four years in a row, McDonald's toys. I'm not even joking. No BS. Rhiannon, how cheap is your mate? Hi, guys. I have a work colleague, and we work, we'll often go out for lunch,

and he will either take his packed lunch and sit at the table while everyone else is having lunch at the restaurant. He will eat his packed lunch or he will say, hey guys, I've actually forgotten my wallet like every second time. Can you get it for me and I'll pay you back? But anytime he pays someone back, it's one cent less. You're joking.

He's down to the... And I know it's only one cent But he reckons he's going to make so much money One day from this Again Rhiannon Is he single No I know

Alright sing him out How cheap is your mate How cheap is your mate How cheap is your mate I How cheap is your mate? I really want to know. It really is an art form. I'm actually a little bit impressed. It's a lifestyle, yeah. I know it's sad.

I'm going to take this toilet paper from work and I'm going to have a good time at home. Zinni is brilliant. Someone who features on our show every now and then is our boss, Ross Boss, and he's a bit of the, you know, fun police sometimes. Oh, he's a cool guy. He's a cool guy. I love Ross.

One of our good mates. And I noticed some disturbing stuff on his Instagram story earlier today. Did you see this? Yeah, I did see this. He's having a big old whinge. Yeah, he was having a big cry and said that he wasn't invited to the New Zealand Supreme Pie Awards. Oh, these happened last night, and they happen every year. All the bakeries around the country submit their best pie,

and they crown New Zealand's best pie. It's mega. It's huge, and he was devastated that he didn't get the call-up. For one, he didn't get an invite, and two, that he wasn't a judge at the pie awards. Yeah, that's how much he rates himself. He reckons he's got that much experience. He's on the phone right now. Hello, mate. Well, let's how much he rates himself. He reckons he's got that much experience. He's on the phone right now.

Hello, mate. Well, let's be clear. You've seen my stomach. I have the experience. We don't doubt it, mate. We don't doubt it. Ross. What are you doing?

As we're good mates of yours and we want to help you, we actually put in a call earlier this afternoon to the organisers of the Pi Awards. This is the kind of action I was hoping for. Yeah. This single act of kindness, Ross, may secure our contract here at ZM for the next decade. I think you'll be excited, mate.

It's been wobbly, I'll tell you that much. Ever since Whitney Houston, we've been on... Oh, we played Eiffel 65 today, by the way. Yeah, blue. Okay, cool. It was great. You're great. That's awesome. Thank you. Yeah, blue. Okay, cool. It was great. You're great. Awesome.

Thank you. Shush, baby. Shush. This is radio, mate. This is our gift to you, okay? Okay. Have a listen. Hello, Natalie speaking.

Can I help? Hi, Natalie. My name's Bree. I'm from the ZM radio station. Hi. Hi. I'm here with my co-host, Clint. We do The Drive Show. Hi, Natalie. My name's Bree. I'm from the ZM radio station. Hi. Hi. I'm here with my co-host, Clint. We do The Drive Show.

Hi, Natalie. Congrats on the awards last night. Amazing stuff. Thank you. Nat, we have a bit of a problem. Here at work, our boss's name is Ross. We call him Ross Boss. And he was actually really upset earlier this morning.

He's put it all over his Instagram. He was having a massive whinge, a bit of a cry, and he got really upset because he didn't get an invite to this year's New Zealand Supreme Pie Awards and he thinks he's the biggest pie expert. I think he's probably lost in cyberspace because we thought we didn't receive his RSVP. If anything, he would have been the first to reply if he got it.

You're talking to a man here. He's a pie a day. He's a V a day. He literally thinks he's the biggest pie expert in New Zealand. No, we're so sorry he missed his next pie. You know how some people say they're paleo? Yeah. He's pileo.

He's literally pileo. He ate a pie a day. He called it, what was it? Pie July. He ate a pie a day. He called it, what was it? Pie July. He ate a pie every day for July. That is commitment. He's got a lot of commitment. Anyway, what we were after from you today, Nat,

we thought we'd call you to see if we can get him on the guest list for next year's pie awards. Absolutely. Nat, seeing as that was so easy, what he really wants is the chance to judge. He thinks he's good enough. He thinks his palate is so refined. He has his ideas of who should have won Supreme Pie of the Year. What's the chance of him joining the judging panel? Well, that would probably have to go through management to go through his CV, you know, just to make sure that his commitment and not his pies is there. Nat, his CV, you know, just to make sure that his commitment and his pies is there.

Nat, his CV is actually his stomach, his belly. He's got a lot of experience, Nat, can I say? You might need to send a photo. He's got a big CV. He's got a big CV, Nat. Quite well-rounded. We're being so serious though, Nat. He thinks he deserves a spot.

Okay, all right. Then we'll try and sort something out then for next year. If not, though, we can confirm Ross Flahive will be on the guest list for next year's Supreme Pie Awards. Top of the list. Mate. Guys. You're welcome.

I'm tight to my ass right now. Clear your schedule, mate, because you're judging next year. At the Pie Awards, it's you and just 100 pies. Can I just be clear? My CV's a little less rounder than it used to be. No. I've shaved some of the references off the CV lately. Yeah, it's gone in other areas, though.

Oh, look, you're great human beings. Wonderful employees. Is that a pay rise, mate? A what? A pay rise. Lock it in. Pay rise. Thank you, Ross.

We'll talk about it off here. Yep. Thank you, mate. Bree and Clint, doing nice things for the community since about July this year. Zine's Brie and Clint. This time on a Wednesday, Clint, we like to educate some of the males around New Zealand to help them out so they can understand us females better. Yeah, thank you for that.

Because we're a weird breed, aren't we? Thank you for a glimpse into that weird crystal ball. You don't want a bigger glimpse than this, I'm telling you now. You've given me more glimpses in the two months that we've known each other than I think I ever wanted into how women operate. What's that supposed to mean? I'm just saying, no, no, do you?

Do you? Love you. Yeah. Just there have been certain illusions that have been shattered. Sorry, I'm keeping it real. Yeah. I'm keeping it real. That's it.

That's it. There's bodily functions, mate. I just can't show, you know. Anyway, to make it more relatable and cater to our male demographic, we get some of the guys from around the office here to voice some of them. I believe you're on this one. Yeah, I do feature today. You did one.

I like it. So here we are. This is Hashtag Girl Problems. I am ready for anything today. Nothing's going to stop me now. I am woman. Hear me roar. Apart from this giant pimple on my chin.

Far out. Back to bed. Hashtag Girl Problems. Trying to cover my frip nips in a serious situation. Hashtag girl problems. One word. Periods. Hashtag girl problems.

There is absolutely no graceful way to put on a sports bra. Hashtag girl problems. Everybody hurts. Hashtag girl problems. Mate, the amount of awkward situations I've been in with a frip nip. Yeah. I can't even count. And we can all learn from this too. So, as a man, if your friend has a fripnip right now, lean over, offer to warm them up for her.

No, that is not a good option. Just really get on her level. Just let them be oblivious. It's way better. Just say, hey, I'm here for you. Hashtag girl problems. Hashtag creep problems. Zinni is brilliant. You know the Discover page on Instagram?

Yes. The one you go to when you hit the little search thing to the search people and it brings up a whole lot of posts from people you don't know. You mean the page that you go to when you've exhausted your entire feed, all of the stories, and you want to waste more time? Yeah.

Yeah, I know the page. I've got an issue in that I keep getting served the exact same sort of thing and I don't know why. What's being served up on your discovery page? Every time I go to the discover page, all I get every single day, nonstop muscle men. Just dudes. I was going to say bikini girls.

No, I wouldn't be complaining. It's just dudes and it's the most ripped dudes you've ever seen in your life. We're talking like 12 packs, doing chin-ups, sit-ups, dips, burpees, whatever, and having protein shakes. I've heard that that page is actually what you're interested in and what you look at. No, I'm not being no BS.

I'm telling you, that's what I've heard. Well, if it is, there's a problem because I don't follow any muscle. Yeah, because you're married to a lady. Do you have this though? Is there something that shows up in your Discover page? Especially recently, RuPaul's Drag Race, Ariana Grande, and Survivor. Yeah, but you like all of those things. Yeah, exactly my point.

To try and get to the bottom of it, I've brought in our social media expert. Now, this is the person for all of ZM and the whole company actually who sits over social media. Hi, Tina. Tina, is that your actual title? Yes, the whole person who sits over social media expert. Now this is the person for all of ZM and the whole company actually who sits over social media. Hi Tina. Tina, is that your actual title? Yes, the whole person who sits over social media. Yes, if anyone's gonna know, Tina's gonna know. She's the head of social media. You would think I would know. It's a big deal.

It's your job to be on Instagram, eh? It totally is, yeah. Why am I getting muscle men? I hate to say it, but Bree's right. I told you! I told you, mate. I'm sorry, Clint, but you must be secretly liking something to do with muscle men. Or, to be honest, there is actually one other reason. Yeah, please.

It's that your friends, people that you actually engage with, are liking that content. So it might not be just you. It might be your buddies who are interested in that stuff. Or his wife. Or your wife. So stuff that people you like, what they like gets pushed in. That's right.

Really? Yeah. How do I stop it? Because it's not even like a yuck dudes thing. It's giving me body image issues. Yeah, I can imagine. Like seeing these dudes every day. I don't need that shit.

When I'm lying on the couch and I'm like 15 Instagram stories deep and you know when the front-facing camera comes on and you actually see what you look like, your phone goes black and you see the reflection of yourself with all your chins. We've all been there. I don't need to see some perfectly sculpted man.

Is there a way to change it, Tana? Yeah, there totally is. There's an easy way to hack this and you don't have to sit there and like all stuff that you actually like. You can literally go and use a little ellipsis on every photo and you can just go click the little ellipsis and say, I don't want to see this anymore.

What's an ellipsis? Oh, the dot, dot, dot. The little dot, dot, dot. Yeah, that's the actual word for it. Remember you did that for my ex's profile. You're like, mute. Oh yeah, I muted her. You just need to mute all the muscly men. I can see fewer posts like this. Really? That's how you train it. Also, Tina, while you're here, do you know how to hack people's things? I actually tried to hack your Instagram today, remember?

Whoa, hey, whoa, whoa. ZDM's brain clipped. Remember a couple of weeks ago, it might have been last week actually, I was telling you about how I had my flat inspection. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Anyway, that was a fail. My landlord was over and at the time she told me a few bits and pieces

that I need to know about the apartment. And one of those was actually when the fire alarm goes off, there's a button that's at the front door that you need to press to stop the alarm or else the fire brigade comes to the apartment building. But why would you stop a fire alarm? Because if you burnt toast or something. Oh. Like if you accidentally set it off. I was like the purpose of the fire alarm is to get the fire service there. Yeah. Oh right. If you're if you're you know yeah okay cool.

If you're a bad cook like me. And anyway the button's at the front door. And I was like oh yeah yeah that's fine. I've lived there for six months. I've never had to use it. But I was like oh good to know. Because you never cook too. You just get Uber Eats. Well that's true. VIP gold member. Can't burn Uber Eats.

Am I right? You'd be surprised. Anyway, literally, I love how these things happen. They say, you know, what is it, the rule of seven or something? Where if literally she's told me this, two days later I've cooked in my kitchen. Oh, Murphy's Law. Murphy's Law. Yeah.

That's it. Murphy's Law. Yeah. That's it. Murphy's Law. If it can happen, it will. Yes. And I was cooking in my kitchen and I didn't think I was doing that bad of a job but there was a little bit of smoke and it was all kind of happening. My roommate Annabelle was there and next minute all the alarms

start going off. It was so loud. And anyway, in our apartment there's these massive fire doors that actually release Is that what those are? Yeah, so they're these huge doors I've seen them, they seal you in like you're in the bow of the Titanic Literally And you're like, we're still in here And I've never seen it happen

But the alarm's gone off and these doors have automatically closed us in. Closing us into the apartment to where we couldn't get to the button to turn off the alarm. And my landlord said to me, if you don't turn it off, when the fire brigade comes, it costs hundreds and hundreds of dollars. Yeah, I think it's something like $1,500 for a call out. And I totally get that. But also because your apartment is in the city,

if there's a fire call-out, it's minimum three fire appliances have to show up. So three trucks have to come. So, and not to mention like them turning up for the hassle of me not being able to cook a piece of steak. And 90% of the time, 95% it would be people who have just set it off by mistake. Literally.

Yeah, yeah. Anyway, I've went into pure panic because I was like, what is happening? These doors have closed us in. Yeah. I was like, there's no fire but why am I panicking? I was literally screaming at Annabelle. I was like, Annabelle!

I was like, open the doors for God's sake! And then I was like, get the cat! And she goes, we don't have a cat. Anyway, her and I have ended up together pulling on this knob that was on this fire door. Yeah. So like we were literally just tugging this thing so hard to try and get it open and we managed to just pry it open enough for me to squeeze past and turn this damn alarm off.

Far out. Did any firemen show up? Actually, now that I think about it, I probably would have liked them to turn up. Sounds like a horrifically designed apartment, by the way. Don't live with me, by the way. The magical house that traps you in a fire. I don't know if you could take it.

ZD is brilliant, Clint. Clint, when you think of something that a thief would steal, do you think of money? I think of diamonds. Diamonds? Yeah, diamonds. Jewellery?

Yeah. What about baby sharks? Baby sharks? No, I don't think of baby sharks. You don't think of that? Of course,

the Jaws theme. Do you want it or not? You don't have to have it. Literally, the greatestaws theme. Do you want it or not? You don't have to have it. Literally the greatest movie theme ever made with two notes. Do-do. So good. Thanks for that history of music and themes there. As I distinctly heard like four or five more notes.

Cinematography. What about the do-do-do? All right, all right. Let's get back on track. Thieves have stolen a two-foot horn shark from San Antonio Aquarium over the weekend. How do you steal a shark? Oh, wait.

Sorry, I was going to let that finish. Surveillance footage showed the horn shark being yanked out of an open tank, wrapped in a wet blanket and put in a stroller that contained an actual baby until a female suspect removed the baby and held it in her arms to make room for the baby shark. They put a shark in a stroller with a baby. Yes. What is going on? What is going on?

What is going on? Why did they want the shark? All I picture is later on they're pushing the shark in the stroller down the road and someone comes over and goes, oh, let me take a look at your little baby. And they open the stroller and go, oh, well, she's teethy. Have you seen Free Willy? Yeah. You know when they go and steal Free Willy?

Yes. And they literally go into the tank and they scoop out Willy and they put Willy in a trailer and they put wet blankets over Willy until they get, I'm saying Willy a lot now, until they free Willy. That's the same plan. I actually have another story about a free willy from the weekend. Are their teeth involved with that one too?

Zinian's brilliant clint.