ZM's Bree & Clint - ZM's Bree & Clint Podcast – August 6th 2018

Episode Date: August 6, 2018

Have you won a car?Do Bree & Clint sound drunk?Facebook datingBirthday Banger!What’s better than sex?The Hotness pay-gapFerrero Rocher tasteMax Dad momentExpensive wigClint’s giving Alexia another chanceSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Brie and Clint on ZM. Kia ora everybody. Thank you to Mobile, our show sponsor. Great to have you guys on board as always. Hi Brie. Hello mate. How was your weekend? It was good. Yeah? Tried to have a quiet one.

Yeah. Got halfway there. Yeah. Apart from Saturday night. Yeah. It's okay, I don't need to know what you did, where you went, what you drank. The way I can gauge how your weekend was, how much Uber Eats did you get on the weekend? I didn't get any Uber Eats.

No Uber Eats? I actually visited my favourite Uber Eats establishment, which was this Italian restaurant that I've been ordering Uber Eats from for ages. Oh yeah. And turns out it's in a food court. We had that the other day, remember? We went to take our producer Ellie out to lunch and we're like, we'll take you to your favourite place that you get Uber Eats from.

We always get it here at the show. It's called the show chip. Yeah, we get the chips from that place delivered here. It's amazing. So we're like, great surprise for her birthday. We'll take her there. Turns out it was in a shipping container. Yeah, probably should have Googled that

before we took her there for her birthday. So your favourite Italian place, was it like above board? It wasn't like... Oh, it looked, yeah. It's just in a food court. I mean, I still ate it. Yeah, good. Yeah, it it like above board? It wasn't like... Oh, it looked... Yeah. Just in a food court. I mean, I still ate it. Yeah, good.

Yeah, it was great. Yeah, good. Delicious. Yeah, good. Okay. How was your weekend, mate? Nothing, not as good as that. You went out like adventuring or something.

No, I just went for a walk on the beach. Oh. But yeah, yeah, we'll take it. Yeah, yeah. You could have taken your GoPro though. You know, I got there all the way there without my GoPro and I was like, why do I even buy a GoPro if I'm not going to bring it to situations like this, you know? I hate to say I told you.

No, no, no, there's good footage coming. Oh, is there? Yeah, I'm going to book like a paraglide or like I'm going to learn how to skateboard or something. Can you learn how to drop into a half pipe? Yeah. That would be amazing actually. What do you mean learn?

What are you saying? You already know. I'll be able to do it. Okay. I'll be amazing, actually. What do you mean learn? What are you saying? You already know. I'll be able to do it. Okay. I'd be all right at it. Can we isolate that audio, please, Producer Ben? We'll use it for later. Right, cool.

If anyone's got a skateboard that has training wheels. Also, if anyone's got one of those fully padded suits that Clint can wear. Next, someone has won a car. Yeah. How exciting is winning a car? Probably the most exciting thing of all time. The car's over 10 years old, but still, it's a car. And they've done a lot to get it, mate.

I'll tell you about it next. Here's five sauce. This is young blood. Bree and Clint. Zed him. Zed him. Bree and Clint. Clinton, did you hear about this story of pure determination

over the weekend by a student at UCOL Wanganui? Her name was Eva Harkness and she was prepared to go as long as she could in the competition called Hand on a Car that the UCOL was running in which they would win a 2005 Ford Festiva. Wait, wait. Oh, no, sorry, Ford Fiesta. Ford Fiesta.

If that changes it. No, I don't think it does. No, it doesn't. Still a 13-year-old car. She literally, the competition started at 7pm on the Friday over the weekend and it took 38 and a half hours where she was crowned the winner of the 2005 vehicle. That's impressive determination.

That's two nights where she did not sleep. Look, look, a car's a car, okay? A car's a car, but there's a prize. Come on, you've got to give it, like, when someone says- At least give her a new one. Well, when a place is giving away a car, you just kind of expect that it's new, right? So apparently they do it every year. Yeah.

And they always get, like, a donated car that's secondhand. Do they get it serviced first? Are they like, congrats. I hope so. You've won yourself a 2005 Ford Festiva. It needs three new tyres. It's got an oil leak and the steering rack is shot, but it's all yours.

And it's not going to pass any kind of roadworthy test. It's your problem now. It's useless pretty much. You're going to have to pay to get rid of the thing. Like the car's fully drivable. Okay, That's good. So she can actually drive it. And apparently, cause she's a student, she was driving around a Corolla that was literally on its last legs. Oh, there is no such thing as a Corolla on its last legs. I know, right? They go forever. They go forever. And I was like, how do you sit there for two nights without sleep? Cause you have to keep your hand on the car.

Can you sleep with your hand on the car? Like if you put yourself in a position that means your hand won't flop off? Not worth a day. You might as well just stay awake. No, because you know what happened? It got down to the last two people. It was her and another girl. And obviously you'd be so mentally drained after 30-something hours

with your hand on this car. The girl that she was against accidentally took her hand off the car to put her hand in her jacket. Oh, because she got cold. Because she got cold. Was it outdoors? I think so. It'd be freezing.

Oh, how gutted would you be? But the minute you saw it too, you'd go, she didn't, she took her hand off. Yep. It's my car. I win. It's my car. I win.

I'm driving this 2005 Ford Fiesta off into the sunset. Congratulations. I mean, great. If the car can get ZM and you're listening to us right now, can we say on behalf of the Brian Cleen Show, well done. A car is a car. I'd be stoked with a car.

But obviously there's people out there that have won a car before. Yes. I want to hear from those people this afternoon. Whether it be a second-hand car, maybe you won a really nice car. Oh, you just want people who have won a car. Yeah. It's a hell of a prize. It's a niche group of people.

Not everyone's won a car. I feel like heaps of people. I don't know anyone who's won one but I feel like, you know, Lotto's giving away cars, personal laundry detergents giving away a car. That's true. They're giving away a car on the block. And how many seasons of the block have there been?

There's been a few. There's got to be some people out there listening right now who have won a car. We've got to find them. 0800 DALS at M. We want to hear from the listeners who have won a car. It's a pretty simple one this afternoon. I want to know what sort of car it was.

Maybe Eva with her 2005 Ford will call up. Maybe Jackie Thomas from X-Factor can call up. Zinni is brilliant. So her name's Eva. She's a student from Yuko, Wanganui and they ran this competition where you had to put your hand on the car to win and last

person standing was going to win a 2005 Ford Fiesta. She ended up being on the car for 38.5 hours. That's impressive. That's a long time. That's without sleep, which is important to say too. Two nights without sleep. Yeah, for a 2005 Ford Fiesta.

And I thought, is it worth it? Because I did the math on it and I looked up how much a Ford Fiesta 2005 you could get on TradeBeat. Oh, yeah. So you can actually buy one. I found one for $1,800, which I don't know if it would have been as good a nick as this one. Well, you don't know how good a nick this one's in.

So technically, for $38 around about hours, she was getting paid $48 an hour. It's not bad. Not too bad. It's not bad. A car for a weekend's work is not bad. I mean, I would have wanted, if I was winning a car, it to be a new one. But, you know, a car

is a car. A car's a car. A car's a car. We want to know this afternoon, on 0800DALZM, have you won a car? Because not many people get that chance in their life, right? Nicola, hi. Hi. Hello. Hi. Have you won a car before, Nicola? I have won a car. I'm sitting in it right now. Damn. What. Hi. Have you won a car before, Nicola?

I have won a car. I'm sitting in it right now. Damn. What did you win? A Suzuki Swift. Nice. And how'd you win it? I entered one of those Kit Kat, is there a car in your bar competition.

I bought two Kit Kats for $2. Yeah. And neither of them said that I'd won a prize, but I entered the online draw. Oh. And I completely forgot about it. Yeah. And then months later, I was thinking about how we were about to lose my partner's work car. And I was thinking about how we'd just borrowed my mother-in-law's Suzuki Swift. Yeah.

No way. I was listening it and thinking, that would be perfect, a little Suzuki Swift for zipping around town. And then the phone rang, literally, the phone rang a few minutes after I thought this. And this woman called Charlotte sounded super happy, and she said, do you remember entering the car in your bar competition because you've just won a Suzuki? That is fate. That is. That is amazing.

Because I didn't think anybody ever won the second chance ones, too. I thought it was just like. I don't think people ever win anything ever. Is it nay? I think it's Nell. Nell? Hello. Hi, Nell. Hi, Nell.

Did you win a car? I did win a car. How'd you win? So it was when I was at uni, and the Otago NPC team and, it might have been Vodafone, ran what they called scabs. So they were scarfy cabs, and they were free cars that they had graffitied up with the NPC team and a graffiti artist and they were

free taxis from Dunedin out to Carisbrook. And every time you took a ride, you went in the draw to win it. And at the end of the year, I was the proud owner of a 1974 Holden Belmont. Oh, how good. You won a scab. Now, just

no disrespect to your scab. Did it smell like Dunedin student vomit? I'm not too sure, but we didn't keep it. I mean, I don't have it anymore. Did it cost you more to get rid of it now than what it was worth? No, but we did sink 50 bucks worth of gas into it, which probably got us about three hot laps up to George Street in Dunedin. Yeah, yeah, yeah, nice.

And then I flipped it on, so I suppose I was up $550 because I sold it for $600. You can actually, in Dunedin, you can just park it on the side of the road and that's accommodation. Some student will pay you a lot of money for that. Finally, Jess, did you win a car? Yes, I did. What did you win?

I won a Toyota Corolla. Where from? Don't say another radio station. No, no, no. No, I actually spent about $400 on a cricket text message competition about 20 years ago. Wait, wait, you spent $400 on a text message competition? Yeah, yeah.

What? Every time you, yeah. So you send like a text to message competition. Yeah, yeah. What? Yeah, so you send a text to this number and then it fires back all these questions at you, but every text costs 20 cents. Girl, you didn't win a car, you bought a car. Well, it was worth 22 grand. Also, wait, let's do the math. $400 you spent, 20 cents a text message.

Do you have arthritis in your thumbs? Yeah, mate, I do. ZDM's Bree and Clint. Got an Instagram DM. Nice one over the weekend, actually. Someone slid into the old Clint and Robert DMs, did they? Yeah, they did. What was their name?

A man called Daz. That's disappointing. It's from Daz. Hi, Clint. Enjoying the new show, bud? I listened to your podcast over here in Manchester. Oh, that's cool. How good is that? We're going global. That's awesome. Let Ross know. Hello to Dan

over in Manchester. He said speaking of the podcast, have you tried listening to your own podcast at 0.5 speed? Now first of all. Because it slows it down, right? Yeah, I can't think of anything worse than listening to my own podcast. To make it even worse, you listen to it when it slows it down, right? Yeah. I can't think of anything worse than listening to my own podcast.

To make it even worse, you listen to it when it's slower, so it takes twice as long. Yeah. He said, if you do it, Bree and yourself sound absolutely smashed. Give it a go. Regards, Darren. Do you want to hear what it sounds like? Because you can do this within the podcast app.

I think you can hit a thing that goes 0.5 faster or 0.5 slower. So this is going to sound like us at radio awards then. Yes, this is a live recording of us at 3 a.m. on Saturday night. No, this is from last week's show when we were talking. You were talking about New World. Okay, cool. This is what it sounds like. Clinton, what's your take on when you go to the supermarket,

you know, when you're rolling around the aisles, picking up something and eating it? Oh. And then paying for it at the end? I'll quite often do it with a drink. A drink? Yeah. Maybe a bag of chips.

You feel very semi-naughty but also quite, like, luxurious. You're like, the supermarket is my kingdom. Haven't even paid for it and I'm drinking it. How good is that? I don't think that was from the podcast. That was actually from Saturday night. That's us. You sound, I think, more hammered than me.

Just completely like you wouldn't even be able to stand up. That's us. Do you want to hear some other shows as well? I would love to. What have you got? This is Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Okay. This is from this morning.

Just them having a conversation about going for a drive. So you definitely can't drive to Byron Bay. Well, you could, but it would take you like eight hours. She's not driving, is she? At least. From Sydney. Yeah. So she would have flown with a sinus infection.

Oh, more like ten hours. Because that's only an hour from the Galdian stuff. And it takes, like, you get the idea. Why does Fletch, why does everyone else sound drunk, but Fletch sounds stone? And drunk.

One more. Who? This is from upstairs in our building. Oh, no. News Talk ZB. Not Mike. Mike Hosking. Oh, no. News Talk ZB. Not Mike. Mike Hosking. Oh, no. This is him talking about Donald Trump. Whether Mueller goes to subpoena him or not. And, of course, Trump as president has the power to close down the whole thing if he wants to.

But the political optics of that, as they say, are untenable. All of this will be covered off with Nick Bryan for you very shortly. I mean, me, he's... Please, Mike Hosking, don't sue us for defamation for playing that. I think that was an improvement for that show. Zinni is brilliant, Clint.

Singletons of the world, listen up. That meansians, Brie and Clint. Singletons of the world. Listen up. That means you, Brie. Yep. Anybody using a dating app, flirting with the idea of using a dating app, the whole landscape

of dating apps is about to change because Facebook are going to do dating. I read this and what exactly does that mean? So,

you have your Facebook profile already. You know, it's got your name, a little bit mean? So you have your Facebook profile already. You know, it's got your name, a little bit of information about you, your profile picture, all that stuff. If you are single, you can choose to turn your account into a dating profile. So other people who are single,

you will come up in their feed, I guess in the same way that Tinder works. I heard you guys talking about this off air. And apparently if you go to an event and there's other people that have tagged in at that event, it will tell you how many single people are there. Yes. So remember the old function

that you used to use on Facebook checking in? Yeah. You'd go, Brie is at the airport. Why do people not do that anymore? Because it was real braggy and it's like, we get it, you're going on holiday, leave us alone. We get it, you're at a fancy restaurant. So now you can go to like the Kygo gig and you can check in at the event

and go Bree's here and single and keen to meet. Ready to mingle. Ready to meet fellow Kygo fans at the event. Because of this, because Facebook is so dominant and everyone's already on there and you can have a dating bit and if no one's dating you, I guess they won't see the dating part at all. Like your mum doesn't have to look at your dating profile.

Right. That kind of thing. All these other dating apps are starting to crash in value because Facebook is just going to wipe them out. Yeah, I read something like Tinder lost a quarter of its share or something like that. Here's the issue that I foresee with Facebook dating. What?

You've had your Facebook page for what? How long have you had yours? 10 years? A long time. Facebook's been around since 2007. I think I've had mine since 2007. So it's like a Tinder account except on there is every ex-partner you've ever had,

you're tagged in photos with them. Every baby photo that your mum has uploaded, that's on there. Every bad haircut you've ever worn, that is now going to be part of your dating profile. Every stupid status update you decided to put up at the time. You know the cryptic ones people

used to put up? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've all been there. Yeah, so get ready for that to be part of your dating profile as Facebook launches dating. Hey, on the bright side, I guess the person will know the real you and not the highlights real. Or the Facebook version of you.

Yeah, I'll never get a date. ZDM's Bree and Clint. It's my birthday. It's my birthday. Bree and Clint's birthday banger. We take the people's birthdays that listen to this show and we figure out what song was topping the charts on your 16th birthday. We reminisce. We pick a song to play. It's great. We generally was topping the charts on your 16th birthday. We reminisce.

We pick a song to play. It's great. We generally find that we land on the best song, I feel. Most of the time. Through discussion and elimination. And sometimes we pussy out of it and make someone else make the decision for us. Yeah. But, you know, we get there in the end.

We're being pressured from Ross Boss. That's why. First up, Hayden. Hi, Hayden. Welcome to the show. Hello. Good afternoon, guys. What's your birthday, Hayden. Hi, Hayden. Welcome to the show. Hello. Good afternoon, guys. What's your birthday, Haydes?

It's the 19th of April, 1998. All right, Hayden. You were 16 in 2014 on the 19th of April and top of the charts was this. Ah, the wonderful ginger man, Ed Sheeran is your birthday banger. Are you? That's pretty good.

Can I just ask you, Hayden, as a man born in 1998, do you refer to yourself as a 90s baby? I like to refer, say, later 90s, because then it's not 92 or anything, you know? No, true. I mean, you don't remember any of the 90s whatsoever, but good to still claim it, right? Yep, still claim it.

Yeah, good. Okay, very good. Next, we're going to go to Kayla. Hi, Kayla. Hi, Kayla. Oh, no, no, Kayla. No, very good. Next, we're going to go to Kayla. Hi, Kayla. Hi, Kayla. Oh, no, no, Kayla. No, we'll go to Kayla next. Let's go to Laura.

Lana, hi. Hello, Lana. Hi. What's your birthday? 3rd of November, 1974. Okay, Lana, you were 16 in 1990 on the 3rd of November, and this is your birthday bagger. Check out the hook while my DJ revolves.

Oh, Lana. Oh, my God. Oh, Lana. Oh, my God. Yeah, Lana. How does it make you feel? Old? Yeah. I like it, Lana, though. Yeah, it could be worse.

You could have got an awful song from the year 1990. You got... Yeah, I could have. I mean, an awful artist, but a great song. Wait there. Last up to play birthday banger with us, Kayla. Hi, Kayla. Hi, Kayla.

Hi, how are you? Good, thanks. What's your birthday? 28th of May, 1997. Okay, Kayla, you were 16 in 2013 on the 28th of May, and on that day, this was number one. I need these blurred lines. Oh, no.

Kayla. No, you. Kayla. Can we, of good conscience, play Blurred Lines in the current climate in 2018? I would go for us, maybe. Yeah, Kayla. We're both on board, mate. I love how diplomatic you are on someone else's birthday banger. And I think she's right.

Do you agree? I totally agree. Oh, yeah, it feels right. Hey, Lana. Yeah? For the first time since 1990, Vanilla Ice is about to get played on ZM. Oh, that'll impress your boss. Ross is going to love it.

Here's birthday banger. Turn it up, Ross. Bree and Claude, ZM. ZM. ZM. Bree and Claude, that is the winner of Birthday Banger. Did you say 1990? That was 1990. Vanilla Ice.

Vanilla Ice. When was his other hit after that? Sad to Vanilla Ice. Yeah, he was here a little while ago too. How funny was Lana giving it to Ross Boss? Yeah, turn it up, Ross Boss. Yeah, turn it up, mate. No sign of him.

No sign of Ross Boss this afternoon. Maybe he's quietly into that one, but he can't be seen to be into it, you know? He has to maintain the aesthetic of, you know, hits, hits, hits. He's the boss. Or it could be because we're blackmailing him with that information we have about him. You know what I'm talking about.

Zinni is brilliant, Clint. I got onto this interesting Twitter thread the other night, Clint, where... God, you're really getting into Twitter, aren't you? I know. There's some good stuff on there. I told you it's good. There's some alright stuff. And people were using the hashtag.

Next you'll be retweeting Trump and doing some crazy Kanye tweets. Hey, you never know. And I got onto this hashtag. People were using the hashtag, what's better than sex? And it's all non-sexual things. And some of the ones I was reading were pretty funny. And as I was reading them, I found myself thinking, yeah, kind of. Yeah.

Like some of them were really good. Okay. But some of them that people were writing were leaving work early. Oh, that's good. Better than six. Oh, it's pretty good. Yeah, it's pretty good. Food in general, pretty good.

Pretty good, yeah. What about getting a super close car park? Oh, how good is that feeling? A new car smell? New good, yeah. What about getting a super close car park? How good is that feeling? A new car smell? New car, yeah. I mean, these are all right. They're all right, yeah. They're okay.

But you and I were having a think off air about some of the things that we think are probably nearly up there. I've got a few. Can I set the mood for you a little bit? Yeah, go on. Before you duck into your... So these are things that you would consider...

Better than sex. Than sex. Or close to. Sure, go on, hit me. Depends who it's with. What about doing a wee when you've been really,

really busting to go. Oh yeah, that's definitely better. That's good. Can I say this is hugely offensive to the people that we may or may not be having the said sex with. Can I just say these are things that I think are better than sex with me. Right, gotcha. I was going to say none of my exes are listening,

so I'm in the clear. The wee one, especially if you've been out the night before and you have managed to go the whole night without getting up to go to the toilet. Oh yeah. That's a good time. What about, you know when you get a new iPhone?

Yes. The feeling of peeling that plastic off the screen for the first time. Oh yeah. It's a good time. What about getting a seed or piece of food out of your teeth

that's been in there for days? Oh, can you start flossing? True, but how good is it when you've been working on it for days and it finally comes out? And you get it and there's remnants of three other meals on it too and you're like, oh. And you're like, oh, I feel that clean space between my teeth. Okay, non-sexual things that are better than sex.

Yep, what else you got? What about when you're changing lanes on the motorway and you manage to do it unintentionally without hitting any of the rumble bits? Like you don't hit any of the cat's eyes. OCD people will be absolutely fizzing for that one. Melt into your car seat. How good is that?

Turn the AC down, baby, because it is steaming up in here. What about taking your bra off at the end of the day? I've heard that's very good. Oh, mate. And especially, wait, if it's a strapless bra. Are they extra painful? They are extra painful.

What about one of those stick-on chicken fillet ones? Is that the similar feeling to when you peel the thing off the iPhone? Exactly the same. I wonder if we can take some calls on this. I'd love to know from people on 0800DALZM, what non-sexual things do you think are nearly as good as sex? Call us now, or you can text in. Zinni is brilliant, Clint.

This afternoon, Clinton, we're asking you the people, what do you think is better than sex? I said, I believe when you're really busting to go to the people, what do you think is better than sex? I said, I believe when you're really busting to go to the toilet, you need to do a wee real bad and you finally have that magic moment. Someone texted in about that one. They said, I 100% agree with you guys on it. They called it a, I think it's okay to say. A what?

A pegasm. 100%. It's like that euphoric feeling. People have absolutely flooded the text machine with their thoughts on what's better than sex to the point that I don't think anybody even likes sex listening to this show.

Keep them coming through. 9696. We should turn it into a list of the best ones. From the text machine, better than sex when Mac has put an extra packet of chips in your order. Oh, yeah. Itching that itch that you've spent a long time searching for. When you get home after spending a whole term at Ngā Tāwa Dio School.

Okay, all right. That's specific. That feeling when you cut into a perfectly ripe avocado. And it's like absolutely pristine. Yeah. There's no brown bits. No brown bits and it's soft right to the centre. Just enough.

Oh, take me. Oh, yeah. Give it to me. Georgia. Hi. What's better than sex, Georgia? Itching your ear with a bobby pin. Oh, yeah.

What about a cotton bud? A cotton tip? No, a bobby pin's better because you can get it, like, right down the back. All right, that is incredibly dangerous for your eardrum, but... If you've just joined us, we are talking about non-sexual things that are better than sex. Finding money that you didn't know you had in a pair of jeans. Peeling the plastic coating off literally anything shiny.

Because I said iPhone, but you're absolutely right. You can peel it off a heat pump. Doesn't matter. So good. Food? Just garlic bread. I'm a dairy farmer, and there is nothing better than the feeling of coming home

and taking off your gumboots and your socks. Oh, yeah. And your feet are being kind of moist. All right. Well. Jazz, hi. Hi. Hello, Jazz. What's the Well. Jazz, hi. Hi. Hello, Jazz.

What's the feeling? So I've got three. One is McDonald's, the original chicken nuggets and sweet and sour sauce. Amazing. They were good, weren't they? They're amazing. My second one is a hot shower after a long day. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. And your fresh pair of Kmart socks. Kmart socks? Kmart socks? Kmart socks. Yeah, Kmart socks or any type of new socks. Yeah, new socks. Any new pair of socks and it's just like that fresh feeling and you're like, oh my God, it's amazing.

And you just slip into them and you're like, oh damn. I can't relate to this one. Someone's just texted in and you might agree with it, Jazz. The feeling of climbing into fresh sheets with shaved legs. Oh my God, I agree. I agree. I love them. Men, if you're listening, if you're listening,

you need to try that at least once in your life. Shave your legs. We should do it with you, Clint. You should feel it. It's amazing. From Carolina on the text machine, when you undo your belt after coming home from a three-course meal and a bottle of wine at the restaurant.

That's me all the time. That's you during the show. That's me all the time. That's you during the show. That's me in general. What have we got here? What about, I've thought of one, probably one of my favourite things ever. You know when you've made plans and you really don't want to go and then they message you and they say, sorry, can't come. Oh, you don't have to be.

Mike on 0800DALZM, what's better than sex, Mike? I reckon getting discount on Auckland fuel prices. Oh, that. Hey, Mike, I'm so with you. That gets my motor running, so to speak. Holy hell. Oh, mate, honestly, cringe. Can you just picture Mike standing at the pump just melting into a puddle?

When you whip out the docket and you're like, yeah, give me that discount. That's me, yeah. Going to a guttle and then pulling out like three different forms of discount and then looking out which ones are there. Hell yes. Someone said playing. And then figuring out your saving. Oh, savings.

I can't relate to this one. Someone said playing Fortnite Battle Royale and winning a solo match. Yeah, that's fine. It's good. Sounds good. Popping. Oh, and this is for the pimple people. They said popping a really full. That's fine. It's good. Sounds good. Popping. Oh, and this is for the pimple people. They said popping a really full.

That's gross. Don't worry. Still good. Let's go to one more. One more. Nathaniel. What's better than sex, Nathaniel? Oh, getting a win on Fortnite, that is.

Oh, there he is. Do you have a girlfriend, Nathaniel? Yeah, she's in the car beside me. Would she agree or would she hate you playing Fortnite? Oh, well, what do you think? Well, Nathaniel, it probably has to be better than sex because you're probably not having any after that. No, I'm getting more wins tonight, actually.

Get it, Nathaniel. ZD is brilliant, Clint. This is going to piss some people off because now not just the gender pay gap do you have to compete with, but some researchers believe there is another pay gap in effect in all workplaces around the country. And the pay gap, they have called it the hotness pay gap. What?

So hot people, I'm assuming, get paid more than average-looking people. Yes. Is that what you're saying? That's what they're saying. Right. So it's very hard to prove because hotness is subjective and attractiveness is down to the employer. You don't know what they're into.

But as a general rule, they believe that good-looking people, once you average it out over all of them and if you can categorise them in some way, are likely to earn 12% more than people who are not deemed hot. 12%? 12%, yeah. Oh, that's a fair amount. They reckon there's like some unconscious bias that goes on in your mind as a person,

as an employer, just as a human being, that with hot people, until you get to know them and learn that they're a bit of a shit person, If they are, if they are, that you subconsciously believe that they are more personable, more trustworthy and more friendly just because they're good looking. Really? Something in your mind goes, I like them. I like them. That's the sort of person I'd like to be. And you're saying this is here in New Zealand.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is happening here in this country. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. What's your take on that? Do you think hot people have it easier? I don't know because there's a hot to dumb ratio as well, you know? Like there are people – no, no, that's absolutely true. There's a graph and there's literally hotness on one scale

and then dumb on the other. And it's not everyone but some people just get by on their locks. You must know people like that who at some stage have gone, you know what, I'm really hot. I no longer need to develop my personality, my social skills or any other part of myself as a person because I'm just going to coast through as a hot person. I'm going to use these encyclopedia pages to wipe my bum

because I don't need it. I don't need to learn anything. I used to work with this guy because, you know, there's different levels of hotness, right? Yeah. And it's all subjective as well because, like, you know, some people would say it doesn't matter about looks. It's to do with personality.

This guy had both. He was one of these people, right, where he was so good looking that people used to stop in the street when we were walking together. Like you could feel people just looking at him everywhere we went. The kind of person you see them and you go, he's got to be in a movie. Legit. He looked like a young Brad Pitt.

Was he fit? Super fit. Super fit. He had the rig, he had the looks. And I remember one time him and I went to this TV station and him and I were both going for this presenting gig and I had more experience than him. And as soon as we walked in, the lady that was there goes,

oh, like you could just tell she was literally, and I was like, I'll just leave, I think maybe. It's got a name. They call it the halo effect. It's like there's some invisible halo hanging around these people. And you know what's worse than the one who's good looking and smart as well? And he had both. Yeah, you know what's worse though?

What? When they're nice. Oh, I hate them. Zinium's brilliant, Clint. Clint, I always thought radio was my dream job and I love coming to work every day, but I feel like I've found my actual dream job. Ferrero Rocher are looking for 60 people

to take part in a taste test course where you will taste all of their products as a job. How good is a Ferrero Rocher? Like, is there any fan How good is a Ferrero Rocher? Like, is there any fancier chocolate than a Ferrero Rocher? You know, if you're at a house and they bring out the Ferrero Rochers, they're rich. They're rich. So rich.

Ferrero Rocher is so good that it's a Christmas present on its own. You can just give someone a case of Ferrero Rocher. I'd be happy with that. I'd be stoked. So there's a few things involved with the job listing. It was posted over in Italy where you will have to move to a place called Alba, which is where- You've got to go to Italy.

You've got to move there. Well, you're Italian. And, mate, apparently you need to speak Italian, which I mean kind of. I kind of do. So I tick that off. It also says you can't have any allergies. I don't have any allergies to nuts or anything.

You're good. Perfect. And you need to be able to use a computer. I mean, I'm the perfect candidate. It all comes down to your ability to be able to taste correctly though. This is true. I want you to live your best life. I've organised a Ferrero Rocher taste test for you this afternoon.

So if you could pull that blindfold down onto your forehead. Can I just say before we begin, my taste buds are a little bit off over the years from shots of tequila. That's okay. That's okay. If you want the job, just pull that down. Right. And now what we're going to do.

Blindfold is on. Fantastic. If we could get Georgia from Snapchat to come in now, she is going to help us facilitate Oh, this is a stitch up, I can tell. No, no, it's not. It's not? Ferrero Rocher taste test. Okay. We have several products from the

Ferrero Rocher company. Right. And what we're going to do is Georgia is going to spoon them into your mouth. I've crushed them. I've crushed them so the texture is you know, so you can't tell. Oh, it's round. It's a Ferrero Rocher.

Got it. Okay, Georgia, when you're ready, please put a spoonful of the first product into Bree's mouth. Where is she? She's there. Don't you worry about it. She'll find you. Okay?

All you need to do is open wide for the aeroplane. Product number one, in the mouth. Can you identify that product? Oh, it tastes like Nutella, but also the inside of a Ferrero Rocher. I think it's a Ferrero Rocher. Ladies and gentlemen, she has correctly identified Ferrero Rocher. Can we please send this off to Ferrero as my job application, please? If you get three from three. Okay. Georgia,

when you're ready, please spoon the second product into Bree's mouth. Have you put these through a blender? I just crushed them with a spoon. Right. Beep, beep, beep. Now, no clues. No clues. You just let us know when you think you know what it is. I don't think I've ever even

bought one of these before. Oh, no. I think I've had it probably once or twice. Is that a bueno? That is a kinder bueno. Yes, it is. You're doing fantastic. Oh, my God.

I'm two from two. Three from three. I'm moving to Italy, Mum. Three from three, and you basically get this job straight away, okay? So, Georgia, when you're ready, can we please have product number three spooned into Bree's mouth? Bree, you're doing fantastic. Good luck. Oh, yeah, yeah mouth Brie you're doing fantastic Good luck

Oh yeah yeah No you're alright And then we go into the mouth Don't look Don't look It's baked beans Correct it's baked beans But it's not a product from Ferrero Not just baked beans But cold baked beans. Correct, it's baked beans. But it's not a product from Ferrero.

Not just baked beans, but cold baked beans. Congratulations. Do you know what it takes to be Ferrero Rocher? Thanks a lot. Another one. Ew! Zedian's brain clenched. I was talking to my mum just before the show.

She's a teacher. Well, she's an RTLB, which means she's a teacher who works in multiple schools around the area. So she's like a sub? Kind of. Kind of? Goes around different schools

and works with students. She works out in like South Auckland. And so because she's moving around, her phone's quite important to her. She was out this morning and I think she was midway into her morning and she realised,

I can't find my phone. And so she's freaking out and she thinks that she's left it on the roof of the car, that sort of thing. It's gone missing. You go into a panic, don't you? Oh, and you know how many times you pat your pockets and you go through your handbag and you're like... It's like you're doing some weird dance and you're like, where is it?

Retrace your steps, drive all around South Auckland trying to find it. Anyway, gives up on it, goes home. Dad wasn't working for her. Oh, she didn't find it? Retrace your steps. Drive all around South Auckland trying to find it. Anyway, gives up on it. Goes home. Dad wasn't working for her. Oh, she didn't find it? No. Oh, now I'm panicking for her. My dad wasn't working today.

He was at home. And he gets home. And mum gets home. And he goes, you left your phone at home. Oh, thank God. And she goes, oh, my God. I've been in a panic all day. And he goes, yeah, it was here the whole time.

Why didn't you come back and get it? And she goes, well, I didn, I've been in a panic all day. And he goes, yeah, it was here the whole time. Why didn't you come back and get it? And she goes, well, I didn't realise that I didn't have it. I didn't know it was here. I didn't know it was here. And he goes, what do you mean? I text you. Nice one, Dad. How good is that?

Nailed it. The phone would have beeped right there and he's still... He goes, I've been calling you all morning. Remember last week when we talked about those thieves that made off with a baby shark? Yeah, they stole it from an aquarium, put it in a pushchair like it was a baby. They wrapped it up in a wet blanket?

Yeah, I can't tell if they're idiots or geniuses. Nah, idiots. They got caught, right? Yeah, got caught because there was a baby in the pram. What are you going to do with a shark, by the way? Put it in your fish tank, I don't know. But do you have a fish tank in the car ready to go? Yeah, like how far does a shark travel?

Yeah. Anyway, I thought it couldn't get weirder than that. How far does a shark travel? Something you need to Google if you're going to steal a shark. How good is a shark out of the fridge? Is it like rice? Is it like a week? Or is it like chicken? Is it like chicken? More like a day. Maybe a day. How long has a shark out of the fridge? Is it like rice? Is it like a week? Or is it like chicken?

Is it like chicken? More like a day. Maybe a day. How long has this shark been out? Oh, no, it's only been out a couple of hours. Smell it. No, it's a couple of days. Just microwave the shit out of it.

It should be fine. You'll be right. So I don't think it could get weirder than that. But turns out thieves will steal anything these days. And there's a business over in India that is literally going to go into disrepute because a thief has stolen $20,000 worth of dead hair. Ew. What do you mean dead hair?

So they're a wig factory. Oh. And they make wigs. Do you know technically all hair is dead? Yeah, except for like the little tiny part that's in your scalp. They are dead cells that your body is excreting through your scalp. They're gross. Think about that.

And all you're doing is washing this dead tangly mess that's hanging off your scalp. You've got it on your face. I've got it more than on my face. Ew. I don't want to know. I don't want to know. So apparently, yeah, they made off with 500 pounds of dead hair from a workshop in India.

Did you know that wigs is a $300 million business in India? Yeah, well, there's a lot of people in India. That's where all the wigs come from. All the best wigs come from India. Ah. Did you know that? No. Because they do this thing over in India where it's like a religious thing

where they shave their heads. Yeah. And it's kind of like a, yeah, like a, they give it up for their religion. Sure. Kind of thing. Like a sacrifice. They have all the virgin hair there and they can just, virgin hair is a funny word, eh?

Also, one other thing about hair, why is it gross when it's cut off someone's hair and you're touching it, but it's not gross when it's still on their head? I have a question for you. Yeah. If you eat a meal and you find a hair in your meal and it's yours, do you still eat it? The meal or the hair?

The meal. Yeah, of course, 100%. If it's someone else's, do you still eat it? Yeah, because they have to be polite. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you ever get awkward when you're sitting at a restaurant and you find a hair in your meal and you're at a dinner party and you try and like get rid of it? Oh, no, no.

If it's a restaurant. Yeah. Send it back. Oh, send it back. Send it back and you'll get another dish and you'll get your meal for free. It's fantastic. But no, if I was at your house. Yeah.

And there was a hair in it, what am I going to do? Throw your pad tie back at you and go, oh, this is disgusting. No. Just quietly hair in it. What are we going to do? Throw your pad tie back at you and go, oh, this is disgusting. No. Just quietly suffer through it. So what do you do with the hair? Just wipe it on the chair. Just do what you've got to do to be polite. It's okay.

I've got laser. I don't have any hair. Zedian's brilliant Clint. Do you remember a couple of weeks ago I was telling you I was having an uncomfortable relationship with a lady called Alexa? Yeah, not your wife. No. No, her name's Lucy and we're fine as far as I know.

And Lucy's alive. Alexa, on the other hand. She's the Amazon voice assistant thing. Kind of like Siri, but for Alexa. People know what Alexa isa is yeah i hated her i hated the way she spoke the way she couldn't understand my accent you said she didn't communicate with you well no no no no no not at all and it's like she'd moved to new zealand she was new to new zealand and wasn't interested in being here at all like i would say to her alexa

how long is it going to take me to drive to the city? And she would go, I don't know what the roads are like here. It's your job to learn. Did it make you appreciate your wife Lucy more? Why? Because you've like realised Alexa, difficult female, and it makes you appreciate Lucy, not difficult female. No, not at all.

I didn't put the two and two together whatsoever. What? You're not putting a computerised home system up against your real life wife? Yeah, now I'm going, hey, Lucy, play me my favourite playlist. You keep pressing her? You keep poking her? She's like, can you not touch me?

I've decided to give Alexa a second chance. Really? Because what I did is I unplugged her and I put her in a cupboard. I was like, get out of my life. So this is like when you break up with an ex and you're like, nah, I'm done with them, don't even care about them, and then for some reason a couple of weeks or a month later you start to miss them and you're second guessing your decision.

Well, you just kind of go, what could have been, right? Yeah. So over the weekend I set her up again. There were some good times. No, there were none, but I thought there the weekend, I set her up again. There were some good times. No, there were none, but I thought there could be. I set her up again. And so far, so good. She's behaving better.

I think she got the message. She's starting to understand what I'm saying a little bit, I feel, maybe. But the bit that I don't understand is, is she always listening? Because she's permanently plugged in and permanently turned on. Mate, that's like all of us females.