ZM's Bree & Clint - ZM's Bree & Clint with Matty McLean Podcast – 17th March 2022

Episode Date: March 17, 2022

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The ZM Podcast Network Happy St. Patrick's Day everybody and welcome to the Breein Clint Podcast with Matty. Matty. The luck of the Irish be with you today. This is a fantastical bit of Irish music. It is. It's like Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance. Yeah, makes me think of a leprechaun on a mission. Yeah.

He's like jogging to get to the pot of gold. I say that and I appropriate that Irish culture with love. Totally. And with Irish blood coursing through my veins. Yeah. Oh, I show and work this out, like what percentage of whatever you are. And my grandfather was from Dublin, which means he's full Irish. Yep.

Which means my mum is half Irish. Well, her mum wasn't Irish. Yeah, half Irish, so you're a quarter. So I'm a quarter Irish. Yeah, there you go. Which quarter? Who's the hottest Irish person? Jamie Dornan. Oh, Ooh, Jamie Dornan.

Oh, yeah. Jamie Dornan. I was going to say Colin Farrell. Oh, yeah, Colin Farrell's hot. Ronan Keating. Ronan Keating. Where are the ladies? Oh, there's those two sisters out of Bewitched.

Yeah. There's, uh, who else? Gillian Anderson. Is she Irish? I think she might be. Ben's Googled famous Irish people. Is Ed She Is she Irish? I think she might be Ben's googled Famous Irish people Is Ed Sheeran Irish? No

Who's that kickboxing guy Ben From The UFC Oh Conor McGregor Conor McGregor Niall Horan

From One Direction Yeah Saoirse Ronan Who is Saoirse Ronan? You know her She was in like The Lovely Bones Oh yeah She was in like The Lovely Bones. She was in Little Women.

Yeah. Bono. Bono. Okay, it says Dwayne The Rock Johnson is Irish. I'm starting to doubt this list a little bit. Again, him. Which part? And Graham Norton.

Oh yeah, he's Irish. I saw a really good tweet one time. I think it was Eli Mathewson. It might have been Chris Parker. One of them was on holiday in the UK. And there was a... Oh no, it wasn't even the UK. It was here in New Zealand.

It was a TV3 billboard for Graham Norton. And it said, Graham Norton, straight from the UK. And they wrote, pretty sure he's gay and from Ireland. That is good that is so good brilliant here's today's podcast

everybody enjoy it treasure it relish it savour it yeah take it in really spend a moment with it take it in

suck it up you've had a hard day you've earned this podcast, okay? Treat yourself. Run a bath. Light some candles. Get some wine. Can you eat in the bath?

Yeah, absolutely. You can get those little trays. Yeah. To keep a dry hand. Totally. And enjoy it. We'll see you guys back tomorrow. Bye. What time is it?

One, two, three, four, one KCM's Bree and Clint With guest host Maddie McLean Good everybody, good afternoon And happy St. Patrick's Day Yes May the luck of the Irish be with you I'm doing a jig

May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind be always at your back. Oh, that's beautiful. Did you make that up? No, it's an Irish proverb. Yeah. Oh, you knew. Yeah, I did make it up.

It's because I'm Irish. I am. Are you actually? Yeah, I thought everyone was a bit Irish. Oh, you probably. My grandfather's from Dublin, so I'm genuinely Irish. But I thought everyone was a bit Irish on St. Patrick's Day. I thought you'd definitely be a little bit in there.

Yeah. Especially if you've got a Guinness in your hand. And I will have later as well. Yeah. But I thought everyone was a bit Irish on St. Patrick's Day. Oh, there'll definitely be a little bit in there. Yeah? Especially if you've got a Guinness in your hand. And I will have later as well. Yeah. So that'll be good. You Irish? I think there must be a little bit. Yeah.

Yeah. I'm in McLean. I'm mostly Scottish. Oh, yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah. But I'm sure there's some Irish in there somewhere. The Irish and the Scots get on, don't they?

Just those bloody English that we don't like. Yeah, you bloody English. In the middle. We'll call an Irish pub today and just check in on the people, you know, see how everybody's going. See how... Who's the drunkest guy

at the Irish pub already? Contractually, the pub will have to go, no one. Everyone is fine. And we're responsibly drinking. Everybody has had one water,

one Guinness, one bowl of fries, one water, one Guinness, one bowl of fries. Today on the show, two shots at guessing the secret sound for $100,000 today. It's double or nothing day on The Secret Sound. Imagine if you get through today.

A friend of mine from home in Rotorua sent me an audio clip last night on Facebook. He's like, bro, this is The Secret Sound. And I think he thought I knew what it was and I'd be able to confirm. And I said, look, I've got no idea what the sound is, but yours sounds very accurate. It sounds spot on. Might as well just share it, because someone might be able to use it. Yeah, absolutely. Central locking inside

his car. He reckons it's the central locking system inside a car. Have a listen to the secret sound. Can you hear central locking in there? Yes. You're welcome to steal that guess if you want it At 4 o'clock if you can get through It's a very good guess and it could win you today Because it's Thursday

$100,000 Huge We'll start the show with Tradiverse Lady though If you want to win $50 cash Thanks to our mates at KFC You need to call us right now 0800 dial ZM Brian Clint with Maddie

Brian Clint Come for Tradiverse Lady at KFC. You need to call us right now. 0800 dial ZM. Bree and Clint with Maddie. Bree and Clint. Come for Tradie vs Lady. Bree and Clint. Tradie vs Lady. The ladies are on a three day streak. They've won Monday. They've won Tuesday. They've won Wednesday. Actually,

I hadn't put that together, but that's correct. They are killing it. Can they go the whole week? And to be fair, they needed to because they were falling quite far behind. But they're making good ground. Let's meet our lady first today. She's 26. She's from Tamaki Makaurau and she's a teacher. Welcome to the show, Jen. Hello.

Hey, Jen. Hello. Happy Thursday. Thank you. How's your Thursday going? Yeah, busy. Are the teachers on the pizzo for St. How's your Thursday going? Yeah, busy. Are the teachers on the pizzo for St. Patrick's Day yet? It's three o'clock, surely. No, not quite.

Yeah, right. All right, well, there's still time. Let's meet your opposition today. He is 21. He's from the Garden City, and he reckons he's ZM's biggest fan. Welcome to the show, Nick. G'day, guys. How are we?

G'day, Nick. G'day, guys. How are we? G'day, Nick. If you're ZM's biggest fan, name a Dua Lipa song. Go. We're good. I don't know if that's true, but I'm going to give it to you. Thanks, mate. Unfortunately,

that was not a tradie verse, lady question. Are we getting a thumbs up from Anastasia? It is. It is. You pass. You pass. Only no levitating.

Gene, your buzzer is lady. Jen, your buzzer is lady. Nick, your buzzer is tradie. First to three correct answers gets $50 cash thanks to KFC. Good luck, everybody. All right, question number one. Pete Davidson has tattoos of his girlfriend, Kim Kardashian, including a branded one of her name. Who is Kim's ex?

Lady. Yes. Jen. Kanye West. Got it. He's one of them. We will? Lady. Yes. Jen. Kanye West. Got it. He's one of them. We will take that. Congratulations.

One to the ladies. We also would have taken Ray J. Ray J. Also, who's the other one that she married? The basketball player? Yeah.

Nick something? 72 days they were married for, I think, but I can't remember his name. He's old news. Anyway, doesn't matter. She got Kanye.

Question number two. Today is St. He's old news. Anyway, doesn't matter. She got Kanye. Question number two. Today is St. Patrick's Day. Which country celebrates this holiday? Ireland. Ireland. That's correct. Although we celebrate it too, so you could have said New Zealand.

Thanks for the clue there, Jen. That was really helpful. Question number three. Ed Sheeran announced his New Zealand tour yesterday. Name an Ed Sheeran song. Lady. Yes, Jen. Don't.

Don't? Yeah. A nod, yep. That's the one that goes da-da-da-da. That one, eh? Yep, well done, Jen. Yep, good stuff. All right.

Dua Lipa's my specialty category, so. Jen, you could win it right here. Question number four. The New Zealand women's cricket team have won two from four matches in the World Cup so far. What's the team called? Trudy. Nick. Whitehands.

Got it. Well done Scores are level This is for the win Tie breaker question Number five Cabinet is reviewing traffic light settings next week What setting are we currently in?

Trady Lady Nick for the win Red We're in red and you're the winner Got it Red. We're in red, and you're the winner. Nick, the 21-year-old Christchurch tradie, ZM's biggest fan. Congratulations.

You get 50 bucks cash thanks to KFC. Thank you so much, guys. Thank you. You broke the lady's streak, Nick. Next on the show, we're going to find out who's fitter, me, Matty, or a 94- 94 year old man from christchurch there's a guy in the news today called keith partridge who is 94 years old he lives in christchurch and he still lives on his own and he's revealed what his fitness secrets are right okay uh the things he does to keep his mind sharp his body active and the thing that means he can be

94 and still living an independent life That's quite incredible really We're not just talking like doing a sudoku In the paper No we're not talking aqua jogging classes Although that'll be fun That'll be a great bit of fitness in your 90s I'll be up for that, I'll be keen for aqua jogging in my 40s

To be honest Yes you say that except I have gone to the pool before And done a little bit from time to time yeah and you do feel like a bit of an umpteen like people doing hot laps in the pool and then they watch you just trying to like jog through the water well also because aqua joggers have a pace right there is a pace at which you aqua jog it's usually you and one of your friends absolutely it's all about conversation. It doesn't matter. Yeah, it's like going for a wander around the block with your friends.

Yeah, then you get in there and you go full tip. Trying to turbo lap something down the pool. Everyone else is like, what is he trying to prove? It's aqua jogging, bro. That's how competitive I am. Good fitness, though. Keith Partridge from Canterbury is 94 and he's not an aqua jogger. He's got a very active fitness routine.

You and I took this on today. He says six times a week he will run to the letterbox to get his mail in back. He also does 20 jumping jacks and between 20 and 30 press ups. That to me is insane. It is eh? Well it's insane now because when I heard it I was like oh yeah

20 jumping jacks is fine. 30 push ups, surely I can do that easy enough. It's so hard. But you say that as a man in your 30s. I know. That's a 94-year-old bloke giving this a go. Yeah. So if he can do it, we should be able to do it, right?

Well, you'd think so. Me and you took this on today. This is what it sounds like, us taking on Keith's workout. Here's Matty just towards the end of his workout. 20. 20. Oh, God. us taking on Keith's workout. Here's Matty just towards the end of his workout Oh my god I'm dead. And this is me just towards the end of Keith's workout. Do a nine. 30. That wasn't us doing indoor gardening, by the way.

That was actually us exercising. I was going to say, do you reckon Keith sounds so sexual when he does this? I hope so. 94. Still got it. Still got it, baby. Free and Clint. If you've been following the news recently, you may have come across a man called Tane Hatwell

who's been on a quest to find Red Swift Girl. It's a petrol station love story in the making. It's kind of the nicest thing to happen at a petrol station in recent times. It's such a nice, they call this a meet cute. Totally a meat cute. Yeah.

The man on a quest to find Red Swift girl is Tane, and he joins us on the phone right now. Good afternoon, Tane. Yeah, g'day. How we doing today, fellas? We're all right. You are the Rolleston Romeo. Oh, mate, stop it.

I wouldn't gas myself up like that. Gas yourself up. I like what you did there. So what we know of it is you had a fleeting experience with a lady in a Red Swift at a petrol station, and you've been on a quest to find her ever since. Is that right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I was just doing my standard thing, filling up on a Wednesday afternoon, and I looked to my left, and there she was, hanging out, waiting to queue up for a pump. And what was it that you noticed about her? Probably the red swift. Is that what does it for you? Is that what you're looking for in a woman, fuel economy?

I mean, she had a mask on, but she was very pretty from the eyes up. Yeah. Her beautiful eyes. Okay, so what we know of it is you were chivalrous, you let her have the pump that you were going to use, and then you used Facebook to try and track her down? Is that what it was? Yeah, well, I mean, I thought,

you know, it's a tight enough knit community. Surely someone knows of this girl that was at the server. To be fair, a red Swift is not exactly a rare car. No, that's pretty common. But you put it up on the Rolston community page, right? Hoping that someone might be able to identify her. Yes, yes. Well, I mean, we were there Wednesday lunchtime.

I can't imagine, like, I must say on the group chat message where all the red Swift owners pulled up Wednesday lunchtime. God, if they did, you'd be there. Oh, mate, like, somewhere, brother. This thing has gone bonkers. You've ended up in the newspaper. Media outlets have picked up on this, trying to help you find Red Swift girl. We're now talking to you as well.

People want a love story like this to happen, right? Totally. They want a happy ending. They want serendipitous love to still be a thing that can happen. So Tane, the petrol station romancer, tell us, have you managed to find Red Swift Girl? Red Swift Girl did reach out to me. Oh. Unfortunately, I've got to say goodnight my sweet parents and she

is in a happy relationship, she said to me, but she wished me well. It's that happy bit that really guts you out. Because if she said I'm in a relationship, you're like, I can work with this, I can work with this. There's wiggle room, but if she's happy, you've got to leave it alone, right?

It was just a punt in the dark. Worst case scenario, we'd all just have a bit of a laugh. Best case, I've got myself a beauty and a red swift. Totally. But, Tane, look, you're on national radio right now, so maybe we can help you find a girl. What's your type? What are you looking for?

Obviously a red swift. I mean, I'd like to say I'm not picky but my mother would say otherwise yeah man I just like you know

beautiful eyes and a pretty smile light hair dark hair I don't mind yeah okay I reckon we position you at that same MPD

petrol station in Rolleston at this time tomorrow afternoon and kind of treat it like a kissing booth. Obviously COVID appropriate no actual kissing. Ladies just drive past you and you can do like Tinder in real life.

Exactly. You can meet ladies like that. What do you think? It would be fantastic but I am working tomorrow lunchtime. That's okay. I was joking as well. Oh mate. I wouldn't say no if you weren't. Yeah, I know.

Hey, good luck on your love quest, Tane. I think you've been on a noble quest, and good on you for ending it now that you know that the fair maiden has taken. You shot your shot, and it didn't work out. It's fine. I mean, you get that on the big jobs, don't you? Bree and Clint. The latest.

From iHeartRadio, this is The Latest. Live from LA with Dean McCarthy. Dean, one of the most loved men in the world is turning from politics to television. Tell us about Barack Obama's new show. This is so awesome. He's going to present a five-part series for Netflix, a documentary on national parks.

Have a listen. Here is President Obama. A fish that can walk. Surfing hippos want to catch the waves. Species found nowhere else on Earth. Join me in the celebration of our planet's greatest national parks and wilderness. Got big David Attenborough vibes on that, doesn't he?

Totally. Yeah, totally. He is so well-liked. Netflix is so popular. I think it's going to be a really, really talked about and popular series. How cool. Very cool. Very cool. I've always wondered what someone like him does after politics. And this is a really good way of continuing to be influential without having to get into political arguments and things like that.

Totally. He's advocating for the environment by showing people... Yeah, climate change and everything like that. How cool the world is. Plus, he's got a good voice for a show like that as well. Doesn't he? Yeah. Yeah. Great gig to get to because you get to travel all around the world is. Plus, he's got a good voice for a show like that as well. Doesn't he? Yeah. Yeah.

Great gig to get to because you get to travel all around the world and it's work. Exactly. You know? He's nailing it. Michelle will be like, two flights, please. There you go. There's the latest on President Barack Obama with our Hollywood correspondent, Dean McCarthy. Free in Clint.

Hey, Clint. Yeah? Top of the morning to... No. No, sorry. Turns out I can't do an Irish section. That is cultural appropriation. And as an Irishman, I am here for it.

Yeah, totally. Yeah. Because it's St. Patrick's Day. It's St. Patrick's Day. Top of the morning to you, Dave. Happy St. Patrick's Day. Luck of the Irish today. You and I have both worn green today.

We have. And I would love to say that this was planned and that I'd thought about it this is just coincidence but maybe my subconscious you even wore green shoes I know

maybe it must have known on some level what colour are your knickers green there you go it's the day to even if you don't enjoy it because I don't think

many people enjoy it have a Guinness you know and just for the celebration of the day you just fight it down. You go, oh, yum. That's so good.

I know. And you have to, right? Yeah. You can't pretend. You can't say this is disgusting. I quite like a Guinness now. It's taken me 35 years to appreciate it. I'm still not there yet.

But I would drink it today and I would drink it down and suck it up. Or a Kilkenny. Oh, yeah. Same thing. Good. Yeah, it's exactly the same.. Or a Kilkenny. Oh, yeah. Same thing. Good. Or a, yeah, it's exactly the same. It's just a different brand. Totally.

I mean, some places go all out for St. Patrick's Day. You might have a green beer today. Chicago dyes their river green. See, that can't be good for the environment. I wouldn't have thought so. Right. But huge Irish population in Chicago. And looks great.

Yeah. Like it or not, the key celebration on St. Patrick's Day, in New Zealand at least, revolves around the pub, right? Totally. Going to an Irish pub. So we thought we'd better check in with an Irish pub today and just find out how things are going. It's the afternoon. Is it pumping? It's top of the

afternoon. Yeah. Is Tom the local, the drunkest guy there yet? How's he going? We're going to call Danny Doolins. Good afternoon, Danny Doolins. Megan speaking. Megan, hey, this is Maddie and Clint from ZM Afternoon Show. How are you doing?

Yeah, I'm good, thanks. How are you? Good, thanks. Happy St. Patrick's Day. Yeah, happy St. Patrick's Day. We thought we'd better call and just check in. How are things going? Yeah, good.

So far, we've got people out, which is good. Yeah. Celebrating. Has it been a bit quiet in the old Danny Doolin's Irish Bar of recent? Recently, it has. Yeah. It's not been the usual atmosphere on the viaduct the last couple of weeks. Yeah, definitely.

Has Jacinda come to the party and relaxed the rules for St. Patrick's Day? Because surely it's not St. Patrick's Day if you can't all stand arm in arm and sing a B-Witch song together, right? I mean, yeah. You can relax a little bit, I'd say, but I suppose we have to stick to the rules a little bit. Yeah, totally. Now, what's your take on a Guinness? What's my take on a Guinness? Yeah, you like it? Yeah, I do. I enjoy a good Guinness. Where are you from? Where are you from originally? I'm from

England, so I'm from Yorkshire. Oh, right. Ah, it's not your day. No. No, it's not my day. Are you allowed to be an English person in an Irish bar on St. Patrick's Day, or is that against the rules? Yeah, I think they bend it a little bit. Yeah, right. As long as you're

pouring the beers, right? We've got an important question for you on St. Patrick's Day before we let you go. Who's the drunkest guy there right now? Right now? Yeah. Oh, well, I'd like to say it's a bit early for that. Usually we'd have people in here drunk

because normally we'd be open from 8am but at the moment we actually haven't in here drunk because normally we'd be open from 8am but at the moment we actually haven't got anybody drunk Really? Tell them to hurry up I know yeah they need to sort themselves out I think you need to work a bit faster by the sounds of it

Happy St Patrick's Day Thank you very much for talking to us Oh good thank you have a good one You too there you go Maybe we're becoming more responsible as we grow up. I don't think so. Responsibility? How many Guinness have I had?

Happy St. Patrick's Day everybody from the Bree and Clint show with Maddie. You and I were talking on the show last week about whether or not either of us had ever had a mani-pedi. Had our nails done. And we came to the realisation that neither of us had ever had a mani pedi had our nails done and we came to the realisation that

neither of us have. And what have we been doing with our lives? Exactly. It would be such a crime for us to go any longer without having our nails done. Right, we're worth it. Totally. We're worth it. You're worth it too listening by the way. If you've got manky toenails go get them cut. Treat yourself. Yeah, exactly. Sit in the chair, get them

to buffer them down for you paint them if you want it might need an angle grinder but you gotta start somewhere so you and i are gonna go and have a cute little mani pedi date next week love it so excited about it but maybe my phone knows that we've been talking about it you know how often it's listening totally because um i've all of a sudden been getting all of these this nail content on my social media have you yeah did you have nail content on my social media. Have you? Yeah. Did you have nail content before we started talking about this?

Really? Yeah. Have you searched up any nail content? Maybe I did. Maybe I did. Maybe I started looking up places that we could go and get our nails done. Oh, that'll be it. Yeah, that'll be it, right?

And so this video came up from a nail technician in the US who told the craziest story about someone that she did nails for okay have a listen to this and try and figure out who you think she gave mani-pedi to summer of 2015 I was working in a nail salon in Beverly Hills we had a lot of a-list clients which meant we did a lot of alcohol when I spoke to them they said they wanted the make and model of my car they wanted my license plate number and they wanted my first and last name so he said i need you here at 2 30 you cannot be early you cannot be late so i'm let in and no one in the house is talking that's me in the front door there's still a lot of people no one is speaking

he said he will sit here you will sit there and it was with my back completely to the windows like i was a human shield and i asked yes what is the person's name and he said oh you will not address him and he said if you talk to him which will be as little as possible you will call him sir so he sits down puts his feet on my stool and I say do you mean to cut them short or any nods so I do it so then he comes back and he points to a little corner of his toenail that I need to smooth out and then they get up and leave and walked me downstairs to my car they paid a hundred and fifty dollars in cash gave me my car keys and i drove away

all that to smooth out one toenail exactly i mean she cut them all 10 of them but yeah came back in to finish the job right who do you think that might have been so they have to be a huge diva a guy a guy a hollywood celebrity kanye west no is it not? No. John Travolta. No. One more guess? One more guess. I reckon it's a Hollywood nice guy that you wouldn't expect. Jimmy Fallon.

Not Jimmy Fallon. Okay. In fact, it's actually no one from Hollywood. He must have been there on some sort of diplomatic event. Really? It was Vladimir Putin. Oh, God. I thought you were going to say Barack Obama.

Isn't that insane? Yeah. I get it now. Like, no talking to them, give us your rego, all that stuff. They took her car keys off her and made her go and wait in the bathroom for him. How terrifying. So terrifying. Especially if you didn't know who it was. Yeah. And made her go and wait in the bathroom for him. How terrifying. So terrifying.

Especially if you didn't know who it was. Yeah. So the whole time you'd be on edge. Who's about to walk through the door? Who's about to walk through the door? That's like mafia stuff. I know. Right?

Yeah. Crazy to have that story now too. Exactly. With all this stuff going on. Obviously this hasn't happened now. He's... He'll hate that this story's out there. It's not good for his ultra macho brand. He's like, I did not have

a mani-pedi. I hope it does go viral though. I hope the Ukrainians hear about it and I hope that some of the protest signs now include some sort of mani-pedi totally. We need to get that TikTok to Vladimir Zelensky ASAP so he can share

it on Ukrainian television. Exactly. Bring down Russia one toenail at a time. Kia ora, I'm Jane Yee. I'm Alex Casey. And I'm Duncan Grave. We're the hosts of The Real Pod and Confession Cam Time. We bloody love reality telly. If we sound like your type on paper, join us each week for your fix of reality

TV news, recaps and gossip. On The Real Pod, it's perfectly fine to like reality TV. It's a safe space, so let down your walls, wear your heart on your sleeve and remember, it is what it is. And what it is, is The Real Pod. Brought to you by the Spinoff Podcast Network and available wherever you get your pods. Free and Clint.

Hey, I hate to be the bearer of Sad bad news But New Zealand has lost A Guinness World Record Oh no This is like that time we found out We didn't have the world's steepest street In Dunedin Although then did we

Have we got it back Yeah we got it back We got it back We were so bitter and twisted about it We sent someone to Wales To measure their one And we were like You're off by We're're so petty, eh?

So petty. Although they were petty in the first place by questioning it. To be fair, though, Wales has Tom Jones, the Prince of Wales. They've got heaps of stuff over there. They don't need it. What have we got? Nothing.

We've got the steepest street in Lorde. So don't you dare try and take either of those things away from us. No, this world record we've only held for less than 12 months so far Last year Colin Craig Brown said he had uncovered And this was record breaking The world's biggest potato Do you remember this? Yes I do 7.8 kilos

They dug it up in their veggie garden It's enormous It looks like a dinosaur turd World's biggest potato. Do you remember this? Yes, I do. 7.8 kilos. They dug it up in their veggie garden. It's enormous. It looks like a dinosaur turd. And him and his wife named it Doug. I mean, it's hideous. Oh, no, it's ugly. It's not a potato I think you'd actually want to eat.

It looks like a radioactive baby. It really does. Yes. Doesn't it? Yes, it really does. Kind of like hunched over, curled over. It's like a womb. Yeah, doesn't it?

Well, they have heard back from Guinness, because they sent the potato over there. It has to be verified. Yeah, it's strict, right? It's very strict. You can't just say, hey, I've done this thing, or I've got this thing, and then they go, yeah, cool. I guess we'll trust you.

They're very specific. The unfortunate thing is that Colin and his wife had already done a lap of honour. They'd already done all the press, all the media. We had them on briefers. We had them on the radio. They're on all the newspapers. Photos of them holding the world's biggest potato. I'll read the response from Guinness.

Dear Colin, the email begins. Sadly, the specimen you supplied is not a potato at all. And it is in fact the tuber of a type of gourd. For this reason, we do unfortunately have to disqualify your application. No! No!

Not now. Not right now. We don't need this, okay? We've got no Rugby World Cup. We've got no um... Oh, we did it right at the Winter Olympics, I guess. We don't need this, okay? No've got no Rugby World Cup. We've got no um, oh we did it right at the Winter Olympics I guess. We don't need this, okay? No, we needed a win. We needed a win. Um, what even is a gourd? What's a gourd?

I'm glad you asked. I've been googling it. Um, a gourd is a fleshy, typically large fruit with a hard skin, some varieties of which are edible. I am looking at pictures of gourds. They kind of look like a squash or kind of like a pumpkin.

Right. Either way, this is a big one, but it's not record-breaking, and they didn't submit it as the world's largest gourd. They couldn't change their mind and be like, okay, we enter us in the gourd category. Yeah, I don't think so. But then I don't think it would be record breaking because you know how big pumpkins can get, right?

I don't know what a tuber is. No, neither. Don't ask me that. Damn it! Unfortunately too, the couple who dug up the potato said they tasted it before they submitted it and they said this is definitely potato. They have now had to admit that they've actually never tasted gourd before.

So it could well have been gourd all along. Hey, you win some, you lose some, New Zealand. You've got to try. There's a Rugby World Cup in a couple of years. We'll be sweet. Man, things are expensive at the moment. Petrol, rent, groceries.

Man, I got smoked at the supermarket last night. I mean, given I bought four cartons of oat milk Yeah, that'll do it for you And one of those Dosenco proteins But still, man, it was expensive I also bought dishwasher tablets Those are always good

One of those shops You're living a bougie life, Sam Sounds like it, eh? That's your problem There's a guy in the States who's taken things into his own hands And he has said his work does not pay him enough money To rent a house and commute to work as well. So he has decided to move into his work.

Oh. He's going to live there. He's like, you guys don't pay me enough to live anywhere else. I'm going to live here. He's going to live in the office. What, just set up like a little day bed in the corner? So he has moved his whole life into the cubicle. He's put the food that he eats into the work fridge,

taken a corner of the work fridge. He's made a little bed underneath one of the desks in his cubicle with a little privacy sheet. And he's gone, I'm just going to live here. That's sweet. I'm here anyway. I might as well use your power, your shower, all that thing. Have a little listen to this. This is the guy in the States who's decided living at work

is the way to fight inflation. I'm moving from my apartment into my cubicle at work. You're not paying me enough to do both. So as a matter of protest, I am just going to live at my job. In the second building, we have a men's shower in the bathroom. Okay, we got towels and we got two showers. Come on now. I thought this out, baby.

I mean, I can't fold his logic. No. I don't know the legalities of that sort of thing. Well, I mean, surely the work can't really do much about it. Is it really, is it impacting them? Like, is it doing anything to them? Well, there's a guy living in there. Yeah, but.

You know how things are a bit more grotty when someone lives there? They've probably got some hygiene issues. He lasted four days before they evicted him. Right. But I mean, four days of free rent is good. Totally. We know someone here who could do with four days of free rent. Welcome to the show producer Anastasia. Hey guys. It's hard, right? Yeah, it's tough out here.

I love how you guys recruited me. Well, not me. I've got a perfectly nice house to live in. Yeah. And Maddy's got an inner city apartment. I'm on that TV money, baby. Yeah. You, though, you like to go to the gym across the road. It's a good idea for you. Yes, yes it is.

I think you should call Ross Boss this afternoon and just ask him if you can move into work for financial reasons. Yeah. Or convenience reasons. It's totally up to you. We all know how expensive it is. Oh, it's expensive. Hello. Hey, Ross. It's totally up to you. We all know how expensive it is. Oh, it's expensive. Hello.

Hey, Ross. It's just Anastasia. How are you? Good. How are you? Not too bad, thanks. Hey, obviously, you know, petrol's been expensive at the moment. Cost of living.

You can't stop talking about how much it costs to go to the supermarket and everything. I just wanted to ask you a question. Yeah. to go to the supermarket and everything. I just wanted to ask you a question. Obviously, renting in Auckland is not a cheap exercise. Don't have any family here to live with or anything. I was wanting to float the idea with you of maybe moving out of my flat just to obviously save a bit of coin and maybe move into work because obviously we've got all the facilities here. We've got the showers, the fridges.

I could just bring in a mattress at night, put in the studio. I have to say, I thought you were about to ask to move in with me and my family. So this is a real big relief. Okay, good, good. That's what I was hoping that I would be doing with this proposition. I'm not causing any issues with you or anything. I'll just go about my own life

at work. So you know how though, like, I'm calling you out here, we've had conversations where you're like, I love getting home when the birds start chirping. What about when you're doing that and Mike Hoskins getting into the building or Pitchfork and Hayley? Those are different birds to be chirping at you when you're doing that and mike hoskins getting into the building or please run hayley like those are different birds to be chirping at you when you're getting home

uh yeah that's a good idea but but really what what you could you could turn this into a um a really good opportunity for work and that if i was getting home when they were starting work and the birds were chirping i could just start working working. I could start, I'd be on that buzz, the party buzz, no need to sleep. I could just start producing. I'd pick up the phones, I could get Mike coffee. While you're steamed. I mean, I think there's some legality issues here,

both in just how long you can be working each day, but also we do have some impairment policies. I see. What's an impairment policy? You don't need to worry about that, Matty. You're an angel. Ross has got a great point, Anastasia. Have you ever thought of like you're finishing a big bender

and then you walk in and there's Tony Street? It'd be like walking in and your mum's there. Totally. It would be the best street. It's lovely. She'd make me a cup of coffee. No, she'd be like, you're getting home at this hour Again Anastasia

You're grounded And you know what Actually in result She would say I'm so sorry for you That's so awful That you can't afford rent And she'd offer me her place

Which would be The right thing to do Alright and Ross You've made your own bed mate A bunch of Gen Z's Are about to move Into the ZM offices Over the weekend

Cool Enjoy it I will do Some more remote working. It's time for The Dilf Factor. A weekly quest to establish once and for all who's a dilf and who's not. The good news is I tend to know my dilfs. You've got a good dilf radar. Yeah.

Dilf dar. I can spot him. I can spot him. A Ray Dilf. It's from all that time I've been walking up and down Ponsonby Road. Dilf, Dilf, Dilf, Dilf. On Ponsonby Road it's just like Dilf, Dilf, Dilf, Dilf, Dilf. Okay, you will not be playing alone. Here to

identify Dilfs with you this afternoon is Jess. Kia ora, Jess. Hello. How are you doing, Jess? Good. Ready to identify some delfs. Do you know your delfs? Yeah, definitely. Do you know a delf when you see one? Definitely.

Definitely. Okay, so just to clarify, this is not a game where we're just rating whether someone is hot or not. This is to specifically determine whether a celebrity is actually a legit dad or not. Do they have kids? Okay, all right. You'll be working with Maddie this afternoon. The lady holding all the dilts is Anastasia. Anastasia, when you're ready,

give us our first male celebrity. So your first male celebrity is How I Met Your Mother star, Neil Patrick Harris. Oh. Oh, he sounds like he'd be a Delph. He does. And do you want to trust me on this one, Jess?

Yeah. Yeah, because I know the answer to this. He is definitely a Delph. I'll definitely trust you. I don't really know who he is. Good call. Throw it over to Maddie. You're starting strong.

He is a Delph. Oh, whoops. He's got two kids with his husband, David. Yes. Twins, I think. Double DILF. Yeah. Amazing.

Awesome. So that's one point. You need three to win a chicken dollars for Jess. Awesome. All right. DILF number two. DILF or not DILF number two is Denzel Washington. Oh.

Surely. He's got to be, right? You reckon? Yeah. He's got to have kids. Okay. You guys want to lock that in? Should we lock that in, Jess? Oh. He's got to be, right? You reckon? Yeah. He's got to have kids. Okay. You guys want to lock that in? Should we lock that in, Jess?

Yeah. Let's lock it in. Yeah. That's correct. He's got four kids. That he knows of. He brings big DILF energy. That's my mum's celebrity hall pass.

Is it? Really? Is it? He loves Denzel. Oh, what a good hall pass. Okay. Awesome. All right.

Two from two. Well done, DILF hunters. You only need one more. The third celebrity is Robert Pattinson. Okay, awesome. All right. Two from two. Well done, Delf Hunters. You only need one more. The third celebrity is Robert Pattinson. Oh, Batman. I don't reckon he's got kids yet.

Yeah, I don't think so either. I think you're on He's got big Bachelor vibes, eh? Yeah. Yeah. Do we know if he's got a partner? Like, has he got a celebrity partner that we know of?

No. No, that's Tony Tannen. He was with Bella Hadid. He was with Bella Hadid? Yeah. There you go, Jess. All right, well, you seem to know you're Robert Pattinson, so I'm going to trust your instinct on this.

We're going to lock in no. Awesome. That's correct. He currently has no plans to have kids while he's young, or he said that when he was young, because he doesn't have any experience with them, apparently. So that's three points. So that's it.

Well done. You won the deal factor. So that's it. Well done, you won the DILF factor. So good. Congratulations Jess, you're officially a capable DILF hunter. You got your DILF licence, well done. Thank you, what a title. What a title. You also get 50 KFC chicken dollars.

Thank you so much. You're very welcome. Today, the Prime Minister announced that New Zealand history, Aotearoa New Zealand history, will be taught in schools. Which is cool. So good. I mean, it's about time, right? She made the announcement at Sylvia Park School. It's weird to have a school at a mall, but I guess that's the way they're going, right? I thought you were going to say Sylvia Park Mall is where she made the announcement. Nah, school. I think it's next to have a school at a mall But I guess that's the way we're going right I thought you were going to say Sylvia Park Mall

Is where she made the announcement Nah school I think it's next to Culture Kings Just underneath the Nando's Just as a quick aside At Sylvia Park Mall Where Ryan and I had our first date Was it?

The number of times my wife and I Have run into you and Ryan at Sylvia Park Mall Like you should have your wedding there It's funny you say that Sorry we've gone on an absolute tangent here. But I once did a live morning on breakfast out at Sylvia Park Mall. It was in the lead up to Christmas and we were

talking about how you can come and get your wrapping here and we had Santa and all this kind of thing. So the marketing manager for Sylvia Park was there and we were talking about how long Ryan and I had been together for and she said, are you going to get married? And I said, oh maybe maybe this is before we got engaged. And she said okay, are you going to get married? And I said, maybe, maybe. This was before we got engaged. And she said, okay, if you want to propose

because you had your first date here, this is what we could do. And they were talking about lowering me from the roof in the centre of Sylvia Park Mall to surprise Ryan. They said they could have a flash mob. I was like, you do not know

us at all. And the fact that you didn't do that is so disappointing. I know. For everybody except your fiancé, right? He would have said no. It would have been the end of our relationship. Anyway. Anyway, it's not about Sylvia Park Mall today. It's about Aotearoa New Zealand history being taught in schools, which is important

to know our own history. Why do we learn about Tudor England? Who the hell gives a crap about that when we could learn about everything that's happened here in this country? So I thought to celebrate today, Maddy, I would give you a New Zealand history quiz. You sigh. And I get it.

You and I weren't taught New Zealand history in school. No, no. And I did take history, but I was, as my report card would suggest, quite chatty. Right, okay. And didn't necessarily always pay attention. Well, let's see how much you retained. Okay.

Okay, we'll start easy. Maddy, for your New Zealand history quiz, what date was Te Tiriti or Waitangi signed? 6th of February. Well done. 1840. Oh, wow. Bonus points. Okay, yes. Well done 1840 Oh wow bonus points Okay yes Well done You got that one

It's my sister-in-law's birthday Oh okay cool Yeah Okay next question for you In our New Zealand history quiz Can you name for me Five living Current or former

New Zealand Prime Ministers? Okay. We've got Jacinda Ardern. Correct. John Key. Correct. Jenny Shipley.

Yes. Bill English. Yes. Helen Clark. Yeah, well done. We would have also accepted Jim Bolger and

Geoffrey Palmer. Right. Those are the other two available according to Wikipedia. We would have also accepted Jim Bolger and Jeffrey Palmer What? Those are the other two available according to Wikipedia Is Jeffrey Palmer still alive? I don't know, maybe someone needs to update that page Ben, can you keep score? He's two from two Here comes the next question in your New Zealand history quiz You can play this in the car by the way

Let's see how good your New Zealand history knowledge is Where is the original capital of Aotearoa New Zealand? Russia. Yeah, correct. Yeah. I'm doing all right. You're killing this. Three from three.

Okay, let's get a bit harder. How many Rugby World Cups has New Zealand won in the history of Rugby World Cups? I'm giving this the same importance as Tetanus or Waitangi by the way For a lot of people it would be I'm going to say three Well done Thank you

Don't ask me to name the years 87, 2011, 2015 There you go That's what I was going to say Okay can you go four from four Name the 2012 reality television show that followed the lives of Maori New Zealanders living on the Gold Coast.

The GC. Yeah, absolutely. One of the Rosanna Arkell from the GC was in my team on Treasure Island. Yes, she was. That's where she came from. Exactly. It was the New Zealand's original reality TV show. Yeah, it was like the Jersey Shore. I remember being at a party in 2012 and two of the guys from the GC showed up,

and the girls went crazy. Because they were so ripped. Yeah. And they had so much Dax Wax. It was one of those shows where everyone went cringe. I can't believe we're doing this, but also I'm going to tune into every single episode. I can't look away. Yeah.

Okay, there's two more questions. Great. Four from four. If you get six correct. I'm a New Zealand historian? Absolutely. Question number five. Which former government minister was rebranded Dildo Baggins after a sex toy was thrown at him at Waitangi?

Who could forget this? Stephen Joyce. A.K.A. Dildo Bagger. It was a good shot, too. It was such a good shot. Straight to the face. Final question. If you can answer this,

you are the most qualified New Zealander in the country. You should be teaching the curriculum. Last question in our New Zealand history quiz this afternoon. To celebrate New Zealand history being this afternoon. To celebrate New Zealand history being taught in schools, Matty McLean, where is Clark Gayford?

Shit. It's a curly one. A lot of hypotheses on Twitter. He's pulling pints down at Danny Doolin's for St Paddy's Day. I can't verify that, so I'll take your word for it.

It's either that or Rimutaka Prison. Congratulations, Matty. You have passed your New Zealand, your Aotearoa New Zealand history quiz. I'm so smart. Are you going to a wedding any time soon? I know you're having a wedding, but are you going to any soon? Literally this weekend. Right.

Are they doing a wishing well at that wedding? I'm not sure about that, actually's no registry though so i'm assuming that's kind of the the idea it's a done thing now right yeah you go just a little chip in well it used to be that people when people went to weddings they had a registry because they were literally starting to set up their life together yeah you'd need like a microwave microwave all that kind of thing but now most people have already lived together and have set up a home together. So you'd need like a microwave, microwave, all that kind of thing. But now most people have already lived together and have set up a home together. So like help us pay for the bar tab.

Totally. I get it. I think it's legit. Um, do you know what the accepted, like standard amount of money to put in that wishing well is? I don't. And it's a horrible,

it's, it's awful. It's awful, right? It's so stressful. Cause you don't want to be the stingy one. Totally. But at the same time, times are tough and you've got to put in what you can afford.

So what is the amount of money that people largely accept as the right amount to put in? There's an Australian podcast who have tried to answer this question. You might listen to the Shameless podcast. Yep. They've got tens of thousands of listeners. And they've polled their audience on that exact question take a listen i have a public service announcement so if you're like the girls in our office you are wondering how much money does the average person

put in a wedding wishing well we decided to poll our community more than 15 000 people have gotten back to us and here's what they said 15 000 people it's a good survey number good cross-section and it's good because it's australian so it's very similar to us so it'll even out right so before i give you the answer what do you think i know i'm gonna sound real i'm either gonna sound like a moneybags or super stingy i think well how much are you planning to put in the envelope this weekend i reckon as a single person and if you're it probably depends if you're like if Anastasia's going to a wedding it's probably different to if I'm

going to a wedding. Definitely. Because we we're different ages, we earn different amounts I would say like a hundred bucks You'd put a hundred bucks in there? Yeah. Okay let's go to the other end of the spectrum, sorry to refer to you as that Anastasia but you are in this situation. You go to a lot of weddings too how much would you put in the wishing well envelope yeah

100 would be about right 100 bucks yeah i don't want to sound rude but like i would be kind of thinking about how much i would spend if i was going out that night aka dinner oh yeah yeah which would be about 100 again yeah i'm essentially paying my way. So am I stingy in this? Well, if you're comparing incomes, I think you are. As a percentage of total income. I would have put you down as a $150, Maddy. This is as a single person, but if me and Ryan are going together, then I'd double. That's a great point.

If it was two of you, what would you put in there? Probably $200. $200? Not $150 for a couple's discount well let's get the answer shall we what does everybody think is the right amount to put in the wishing well 23 said 50 bucks 56 at 100 and then 17 150 3 200 or more so guys 100 bucks there's your answer bang on you guys nailed it 100 dollars nice round 100 bucks

it seems fair I think yeah unless you're someone that's super super close to the couple yeah

or they know that you're rich because if they know that you're rich you have to bump it off totally or you have to chuck in like an ecoy a candle

or something to go with it too yeah there you go everybody 100 bucks you'll be sweet at the wedding free and clint time for a birthday banger it's my birthday it's my birthday free and clint's birthday banger your birthday put into our big old computer we figure out the number one song on your 16th birthday we play that and then the best one gets highlighted and played in full

people love finding out their birthday bangers as well. It's so nostalgic. Yeah. Like it takes you back to such a good, well for a lot of people 16, good time in life. Totally. And a really specific time in life as well and it just brings back so many memories. I love it. You're on the cusp of adulthood. You think you're so much older than you actually are. It's good. So let's meet today's contestants. Amy's here first. Kia ora Amy. Hi, how are you? Good. Are you immediately transported back to the age of 16 right now? Yeah, absolutely. I love it.

Okay, let's figure out your birthday banger. What is your birthday? Cool. I'm the 10th of November, 1997. All right, Amy, you were 16 on the 10th of November, 2013, and this was your number one song. I'm friends with the monster, the son of my bed. Get along with the voices. Sounds good. It's a great birthday banger. Yeah, that's good.

Yeah, that's awesome. I reckon, and I say this without having done my research, I reckon this was the last great Eminem song. Yep. Do you reckon? Yep. I'd say that. He is great, and he will always be great.

But after this, it was a bit, eh. Everything up to this point, yeah, bloody good. And add Rihanna into the mix, and you're going to win it. Okay, you like it, right, Amy? Yeah, I love it. That's great. Perfect. Okay, hold there.

We'll do a birthday banger for Jack. Hi, Jack. Hi there. How's it going? Good. How are you doing? I'm good, thanks. I. That's great. Perfect. Okay, hold there. We'll do a birthday banger for Jack. Hi, Jack. Hey there. How's it going? Good. How are you doing? I'm good, thanks. Just chilling around. Nice. You're going to go and pour yourself a Guinness later on for St. Paddy's Day? Oh, that is the plan, but my parents are in town, so hopefully they'll just join me. Nice. I thought you were going to say, so I have to sneak it.

Yeah, Mum will get on the Guinness, won't she? To be sure, to be sure. Okay, Jack, what's your birthday? It's the 1st of Jan 2001. Oh, New Year's Day. Alright, you were 16, Jack, on January 1st, 2017, and this was top in the chart.

Banger. So good. Banger. Soldiers. Bruno Mars. Fun fact, produced by Skrillex. Really? I didn't know that. Yeah. You get 24 karat magic.

Do you like this, Jack? Oh, I'm actually a bit of a Bruno stan. So is my mum. Are you? You and mum? Yeah. We went and saw him live. Did you?

Yeah. That, we went and saw him live. Did you? Yeah. That's cute. Well, get on the Guinness with mum, and then whack on This Is Bruno Mars on Spotify, and you guys are in for a hell of a Thursday night. Yeah, you're in for a good time. Okay, wait there. We've got to do one more birthday banger for Dave. G'day, Dave.

Hey, Dave. Yep. How are you doing? I'm good. I'm good. How are you? Good, thank you. You having a good Thursday? Yep. Very good. Very good. So far I'm good, I'm good. How are you? Good, thank you. Having a good Thursday?

Yep, very good, very good. So far, so good. Nice, Dave. Let's find out your birthday banger. When's your birthday? 24th September, 1972. All right, Dave. You were 16 on the 24th of September, 1990,

and this is your birthday banger. Bon Jovi. Cool. And Blaze of Glory. Does this bring back some memories, Dave? Yep. It does. You on your motorbike.

With a guitar slung over your back. Wind blowing through your hair. Do you like it? Yep. Yeah. Thank you so much. Okay, good. Wait there.

We're going to decide on a winner for birthday banging this afternoon. Rihanna and Eminem, 24 Karat Magic, Bruno Mars or Bon Jovi. I hate Bon Jovi, so I'm not voting for it. It's not that for me. But the other two are both bangers. Both bangers. I think I'm going the monster. Are you? Yeah. I'm full Bruno Mars on this one.

24 karat magic, which means we need to go to a split vote. Producer Anastasia, what is the winner of birthday banger this afternoon? I'm going to go team Maddie today, the monster. There we go. We've got a winner. And Amy, congratulations, you just won birthday banger. Oh, that's awesome. Thank you so

much. There you go. Coming straight out of 2013, this is your birthday Banger. Oh, that's awesome. Thank you so much. There you go. Coming straight out of 2013. This is your Birthday Banger on ZN. This seems greedy, but Netflix are cracking down on password sharing. No. If you are on mum and dad's Netflix account, but you don't live at home anymore, Netflix have gone, help us, we're poor and they're going to force you

to give them, what is it, 12 bucks 15 bucks a month they have said Netflix, we've always made it easy for people who live together to share their Netflix account with features like separate profiles and multiple streams in our standard and premium plans

while these plans have been hugely popular they've also created some confusing confusion about how you're meant to share your netflix no no no there's no confusion netflix they've come out and said that password sharing is impinging on their ability to create movies and tv shows. Oh, come on. I think you're doing okay. You're being greedy. You are the biggest media company in the world. Like, they're bigger than, surely they're bigger than the BBC. Absolutely.

Right, they're a global. Totally. And they're competing. They're winning Emmys and Oscars and all the rest of it. But no, they want your 12 bucks. They want it. We have rest of it. But no, they want your 12 bucks. They want it. We have to have it. Please.

They are trialing a premium service which allows you to share your password. They reckon they've got new technology that will prevent you from sharing it for free.

I have no idea how it works, but they are currently trialing in Chile, Costa Rica, and Peru the ability to share it. And they are currently trialing in chile uh costa rica and peru uh the ability to share it and they're going to charge you an extra between three and four dollars fifty a month to share your password with someone that's not too it's not too bad it's not too bad i just don't understand how they're going to enforce it no i guess they go they know where the ip addresses and they go

this house is in invocago and this house is in Invercargill and this house is in Brisbane. Totally. We know what you guys are doing. We have to stop it or something like that. We do have quite a good arrangement with Ryan's sister. We do one, she does another. My father-in-law has floated the same idea. Yeah, it's great.

We're on all the things, the Spotify's and all of that. Yeah. Surely we should each be paying for a family plan and then adding each other to the family. Because there's only so many of us. Surely that's a good way to do it. It makes sense. Although every now and then it's annoying when you log in

and you realise that I've been accidentally watching stuff on your profile. You're like, why are you watching this show? That's rookie though. I always turn to Ryan and I'm like, why are you watching this show? That's rookie though. I always turn to Ryan and I'm like what are you watching? And he's like it's not me it's the kids. Or at least he wants you to think that. Well watch out if you've got a password

that you're still using from an ex oh that's another one. If your ex is still on your Netflix. That's great revenge isn't it? True. If you want to get back at your ex change all of your passwords. If you think that they're still on your Netflix or your Spotify or your Neon,

change your password because they'll be so pissed off. I saw a really good story of someone who didn't realize for such a long time that actually one of the profiles on Netflix wasn't a settings button. It was the ex who just changed the profile picture

to one of that the wheel. The settings cog, yeah. The cog. That's very clever. Brilliant. Very smart. We went and visited

some friends recently and their five-year-old wanted to involve Ryan and I in her playtime, I guess. Oh, yeah. That's cute.

Super cute. And so she was using her imagination and cooking us lots of food. Love that. Asking us for our orders and we'd say, oh, bring us a burger and she'd go away Super cute. And so she was using her imagination and cooking us lots of food. Love that. Asking us for our orders and we'd say, oh, bring us a burger.

And she'd go away and pretend to make a burger. How were her fake burgers? So good. Delicious. Juicy? Juicy. Yeah, good. And had really nice aioli.

Vegan options? No, this was straight meat. Yeah, right. Yeah, but that's okay because I eat meat. Yeah, well, good. A lot. Lucky. Lucky because that's all that was on offer in the imaginary kitchen.

Anyway, so at one point she came up to us and she was holding a stick. Right. And she said, look what I've got. And we said, oh, because she'd been making us stuff in her pretend restaurant, we said, oh, is that for stirring? Is that for cooking with?

And she goes, no, it's for killing. Whoa, whoa. Definitely not a vegan option there And we thought Well that's second turn And it was just one of those moments Where I went Your kids are kind of creepy sometimes

There is no filter No filter And quite often they'll say Like it's fine if you know That they've picked it up from somewhere Like if they accidentally saw a TV show or something It's really creepy when there's no motivation for it And they've

just shown their murderous streak. Totally. You know? Yeah. Oh, God. So, in quite a funny coincidence, I found this thread on Facebook on a page called Mouth of Mums. Right.

And someone posted on the page the question, what is the creepiest thing your kid has ever said to you? Hundreds of response from parents. Because I'm sure as a parent, you must have stories as well, right? Definitely, already. Yeah. The most common stories were always about kids seeing people in the room who weren't there. Those ones are amazing to me.

Yeah. Because do they have Some kind of connection To the supernatural That we aren't aware of As adults Yeah So I thought I'd share Some of the creepiest ones

Go on One night I was on the toilet And my then three year old Came running in Closed the door Put her fingers to her lips And said Shh

The man is coming And then she turned The lights off. Oh, that actually gives me goosebumps. The mum said, glad I was on the toilet because I shat myself. That's the place for it. Hopefully the toilet has a lock on the door. Another one recalled, who's that man standing at the door?

Of my bedroom, we were home alone. Again. See, I'm getting all tingly so creepy like from a kid i know and it's like you don't know if the kid is just really imaginative or if they're seeing things on like a different spiritual that's what i mean the adults just don't see uh one dad told a particularly spooky story of his young son being scared of the man in the road shouting at them while at 2am while waiting for roadside assistance when their car had broken down he then asked to come into the front with us as the man was shouting at his window again

no one there see that's so scary yeah that's freaky that's hayley joel joel osmond the sixth sixth sense kind of stuff, right? Yeah, that's scary. Closest I've got is my two-year-old daughter, Tui. Over summer, I was putting her down to sleep. And I don't usually stay in the room to wait for her to go to sleep. But we were staying at her grandparents' place. Everything was a bit different.

So I waited in the dark with her until I knew she'd drifted off. And I'd been in there for about 15 minutes and I thought she was asleep. And she hadn't moved. And then out of nowhere, she just stood up in the cot, looked at me and said, Dad, I'm crazy. But it's fine because she is.

I was like, yeah, I know. You're like, tell me something I don't know. Go to sleep. And she did. It's been fine ever since. She's legit crazy. It's sweet. Play ZM's Brand Clint

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