ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 10th February 2022

Episode Date: February 9, 2022

Sex & Calories  AirBnB Cat  Top 6: Potato Milk  Silly Little Poll!  Bet I Can Guess Your Mums Name!  Dumb Injuries  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fleets, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fleets, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. Thanks to McCafe. Try their refreshing McCafe iced coffee. It's available now at Macca's. We've got to keep this short because we're off to a photo shoot. Yes, we are.

We're going to get primmed and primed and plucked and pruned to look nice and good. I hope their Photoshop's good to take this grimace look of pain on my face. Yeah, the back's still going. Yeah, Boone, can we get you to stand up, sit down? If we could get you to do a cartwheel, if you could just do a jump, if you could kick this thing. We're going to do one, two, three. You're all going to jump in a year.

And I'll be like. I haven't decided what faces I'm going to pull. I have a limited amount of faces. Right. And any time in a photo shoot, if it goes on for too long, I always say, no, no, those are my faces. We're done. You've got them all.

You've had them all. You've got them all. Maybe we can try. No, no, no, no, no. But we've been here for three hours and we've let you do your stuff, but now I'm going to chuck at you 50 more recommendations. Yeah. What about, oh, your dog's just died.

There you go. What kind of photo is that being used for? I'm not sure. Shock. Yeah. Yeah, right. Absolute shock. Yeah.

Fletcher's got limited faces. I do a lot of thumbs up. I do a lot of thumbs up in photos. Oh, yeah? Yeah. I do a lot of open mouth, raised eyebrow. Yeah, I love What's your number? What do you go to? I do a lot of thumbs up. I do a lot of thumbs up in photos. Oh, yeah? Yeah. I do a lot of open mouth, raised eyebrow. Yeah, I love an open mouth. Ah!

I'm so excited! Yeah. I just hate photos, eh? I hate them. Yeah, same. And I've got a bung eye, because I've had that accident as a kid, and I've got a scar across my face.

It's all tight, so when I smile... You see? Oh, yeah! Mine does cut a little bit of a situation, too. Yeah. I've got an eye that... Yeah, but you didn't have an accident. What's your excuse? Ugly. It's all tight So when I smile You see Oh yeah I got a little bit of a situation too Yeah I got an eye that Yeah but you didn't have an accident What's your excuse

Ugly Just like So did you just In a way Call me ugly Fucking ugly No You're beautiful

Because your scars and memory I'm just Fucking I'm alright You're beautiful I don't need your pity You're beautiful No matter what need your pity You're beautiful No matter what they say

Oh you just turned my James Blunt into a Christina Aguilera Wow Oh my god have we just You're beautiful No matter what In every single way Oh my god Mash up

The mash up nobody wanted Play it James Fletchford and Hayley Hayley G'day Hayley Thanks Rachel shop nobody wanted. Thanks Rachel. Welcome to the show Fletchborn and Hayley it's two minutes past six. Another muggy sweaty humid start to the day for a lot of the country.

Yeah it is. It's not nice to start the day already sweating. Especially when your day starts at 4am. Yeah. Unless it's in like Thailand or because you're on holiday. You're just like, yep. You can go get a rub.

Yeah. But you're waking up at 4am but it's like 10am back home. Yeah. Remember jet lag? Oh, I'd love a bit of jet lag. Oh, what a bit of jet lag. What a bit of jet lag. How's your of jet lag? What about a little bit of jet lag? How's your arm?

Boosted We're boosted Hayley and I are boosted Turbo boosted Turbo boosted Sore arm It's like I've got the biggest dead arm You know like a school dead arm

Yeah Or a fight with your brother dead arm Can I punch it? That's what we used to do at high school You'd get your vaxxers And then you'd get a punch Do you remember that? No

I've severed the form I had to punch you in the arm. Oh, they didn't have to. No, they quit in August, they did. I don't think it was in the curriculum. They weren't getting points towards the end of the anniversary by punch me. I was prepared yesterday to spend the whole day on the couch because a lot of people said that they got a bit knocked around by the booster.

Yeah. I'm a spring chicken. You are. Just apart from the arm. When are you getting yours? Monday. Valentine's Day. Okay.

Cute. And the day before my wife's birthday. So it looks like I might be out of commission. Oh, no. I can't put in too much effort because I'm immunized. Was that on purpose? Let's call it a happy coincidence. At this stage? Let's call it a happy coincidence. At this stage?

Let's call it a happy coincidence. Your chance to win cash again this morning. 7.30, we'll do Ice 5, famous New Zealand landmarks, all thanks to OPSM. We've got a $200 OPSM voucher up for grabs and $250 cash. Add to cart returns again today. You haven't had a peak yet, have you? I haven't had a peak.. I haven't had a peak.

Don't. 8 o'clock is the first item that we'll give you. You've got to collect the items across the day to win everything this afternoon with Bree and Clint. The top six is coming up. Yeah, the top six milks of the future. Step aside. Oat, soy,

almond, coconut, rice, cow. Yes. Traditional. Because potato is joining your ranks. Oh, yeah. Would it be like a really runny mashed potato? Oh, yeah.

Would it be starchy and bleh? I don't know. I feel like it would coat the teeth. Yeah. Did you ever have to peel the potatoes for mum before she got home from work? Yeah. Yeah, it'd be like that water that you put them in. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Kind of greeny. Because you It'd be like that water that you put them in. Yeah.

Kind of greeny. Because you had to put it in the water otherwise they'd go brown. Yeah. They had to stay submerged. And then she'd pour that out and get some hot water in so it would boil quicker. Yep. 100%. Yep. Well, the top six. That's disgusting. The top six dealing with potato

milk. And the other top six milks of the future. Up next there is a new online calculator, which will tell you which sexy fun time positions burn the most calories. The Men's Health website from Mars have created their own online calculator that estimates how many calories you can burn whilst having sex. If you're tracking your calories

like you're into your Apple Watch, closing your rings, or whatever the Samsung version is, or Fitbits. Don't say that Hayley. This is great because there's no option on your smartwatch. For sexy time? For this, unless you say it's cycling.

Or dancing. Or dancing, yeah. Or just other. Other. Just put everything as other. Is there other? There's other. Oh, okay.

And it kind of bases it on your heart rate. Right. More than your movement, I think. Well, they've sort of done something similar, like done a lot of tests, and they've come up with a calculator. You go onto the website frommars.com forward slash sex dash calculator,

and there's a number of positions to choose from. So you can't enter your own position. Right. And I do want to point out, straight out the gate, missionary is absent. What is the closest thing to it? You can't forget the classics. It's a classic, yeah. The closest thing to it on this

website would be, I reckon, spooning on the side? Just spooning laying there. No, no, no, spooning position. Oh, right, okay, right, right. Spooning position. I'd say that's the closest to the missionary. Okay. You've got all sorts of options right. Spooning Pazish. I'd say that's the closest to the missionary. Okay. You've got all sorts of options here.

It doesn't have another name, does it? Missionary. Missionary has only ever been called missionary. Well, no, there's not because there's little diagrams. Oh, beside them. Little, like, human cartoons. Okay. Doing the Pazishi.

So we've got, you know, we've got your reverse cowgirl. Okay. We've got your standing. Standing. We've got your standing. Standing. That must burn some calories. Yeah. We've got the squat, which is whoever's on top just sort of squatting down. 69's there. Wow. The lotus. So what

they've done is they... The lotus? Yeah. So they've put a little list before you use this and they said the number one calorie burning position is the butter churner. The old butter churner. Do we want to know what that is? What time is that?

My friend Bruce used to call that the froggy dip. The froggy dip? The froggy dip. I guess the person churning the butter is a froggy. And they do it in a dip. Yeah, right. In the pot of butter. How many calories per hour?

So per 30 minutes. 30 minutes. Jesus. 200 or 11. Per hour. Because everything's calories per hour. You know what I mean? Yeah, I know.

But then even they've got it by half hour. Yeah. No, no, no. So they've gone. No one's going to be able to keep the froggy dip up for too long. Even Bruce, froggy dip champion. So the number was, so they've just pulled out the butter churner as the highest.

For those brave enough to try it, the butter churner, also known as the squat thruster, and then it describes how it is, which I'll leave off radio, burns the most calories at 211 for every half hour or seven calories a minute. Right. So then if you go down on the calculator, you can go to all the different styles. So let's say you've done your deed and you

want to go and you want to log. So you go, okay, well we spent 10 minutes in standing. Jesus. Then we moved into, I'll say three in the kneeling wheelbarrow. You're not going to be able to do the kneeling wheelbarrow with your back. Not at the moment. Even standing, I don't even know. We dabbled, I'll say two in the kneeling wheelbarrow. You're not going to be able to do the kneeling wheelbarrow with your bath. Not at the moment. Even standing, I don't even know.

We dabbled, I'll say, two minutes in the eagle, and we finished spooning for one minute. Let's just say that. I'll just check. I might be able to froggy dip. Yep. Oh, no, no, right at the top. You've done your back in there.

It was a little pinch. Shall I add, just for fun, one minute in the butter churner? Yeah. Okay. So then you add all that in. How many minutes all up is that? So 1, 10, 11, 14, 16, 17. Okay.

Okay. 17 minutes, yeah. After that 17 minutes, moving through the positions, I go calculate 103 calories in total. Oh, not enough. Yeah, but to add that to your daily calories, it all adds up. And if you could probably put the heater on or something, make it sort of more of a Bikram situation.

How many calories? 100 calories. So 103 for doing all those things. And you can clear it and then add your other things. So let's just say that you did, you just went full spooning the whole time for nine minutes. Okay. Calculate. Just 30. Just 30 calories. That's more about the whole time for nine minutes. Okay. Calculate.

Just 30. Just 30 calories. That's more about the love than the fat burning. Okay, so then I've got snacks afterwards that are 100 calories. Okay. If you're looking to keep it all even keel. So you're going to want to at least butter churn for 60 minutes to burn that. Well, I was going to say I just looked up I just looked up snacks for a hundred given that regime

that we just figuratively put ourselves through. One cup of blueberries or a hard-boiled egg. Okay. No, it doesn't scream sexy when you've just... Nothing like getting up after a steamy session and saying, I'll put the pot on and chuck a couple

eggs in there for us. Or you could have a half a cup of oatmeal. Oh, that would probably be easier. Quick oats. A handful of almonds. That's my breakfast. How much butter churning did you do to earn? None.

Okay, well, you've got some butter churning to make up for it, buddy. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley Well a California cat owner Is in a flap After Airbnb Guests took his cat And it's not like It's just a mangy tabby Just a moggy

You are such a cat snob Yeah you are With your pedigree I say that because The cat's like got a bit of a He's got some chunks missing You know cats when they get into fights. Adopt, don't shop.

Yeah, oh totally. That's where I got mine from. Yeah, yeah, yours was a rescue. Yeah, Trade Me's adoption, right? Yeah. Yeah, that's what I thought. And you pay them lots of money and they... Yeah, yeah, she'd be like a couple of grand. Yeah, yeah, sure. Yeah, not quite. Well, this family was in this Airbnb

and saw this cat and they were like, oh, no one's looking after it. Oh, because it was all looking all chunky. Because it was just a tatty, chunky tabby. And so they took the cat and then this guy that lives next door and rents out the Airbnb was like, that's my cat. And now they're in this big fight for who owns the cat because the people in the Airbnb were like, it was neglected.

Oh, okay. I didn't know that it was neglected. I thought they just fancied the cat and just went, I'm going to take that cat. I've thought about it before with some cats. I've gone, that's a lovely cat. Well, yeah, we used to flat next to that cat. He looked exactly like that ad.

Henry. And the old lady called and it was like that. The whiskers cat. Yeah, the whiskers cat. He like that ad. Henry! And the old lady called and it was like that. The whiskers cat. Yeah, the whiskers cat. He was really cute. That was a British short hair, wasn't it?

Yes, it was. But if they thought that it was genuinely, I mean, they shouldn't take it. They should have called animal protection. I think it was just old and it's been microchipped.

Yeah. So this is like this ongoing thing and the sheriff's involved and this guy's like, give me my cat back. It's mine. You can't just take someone's cat. Well, you just said you wanted to take lots of people's cats.

I'm jumping around a bit. She's resisted the urge though. I'd be so upset. I don't think you need to worry about it. Why? Huh? Because it's a $100 mongrel. Is that why?

Yeah. No one ever steals them. Well, I mean, I stand corrected because these people stole a muchy thing, didn't they? Yeah, but where I live, on the local community page, constantly people have their cats going missing. Did you see Seven Sharp last night? Your cats were being shaved. Yeah, shaved.

People are shaving other people's cats. Yes. Is that because they don't like them on their lawns, eh? So they grab them, they shave them, and then the owners are like, I'm more likely to keep them inside or monitor where their cats go. Shaving them? What a silly thing to do. But then there was, like, a bit more investigation.

If your cat comes back shaved, there was this guy going around and he'd, like, lure the local cats in. And then if they weren't like de-sexed, he'd get them de-sexed and then just drop them back off again. Well, that's quite nice. Well, that's saving you a hundred bucks, isn't it? It is. And no one really wants to breed from a tabby, right?

Yeah, unless you wanted to breed your cat, you'd be upset. No. Yeah, but no one breeds a street cat. But is he like a vigilante vet? Or is he taking them to a vet? I assume there was a vet involved, whether he be the vigilante vet. I mean, you can't just be rocking a...

Is this the next Marvel superhero? The D-Sexer? Yeah. That's not a great title. No. It's quite a boring movie. He's just snaffling up cats and then... You would hope they'd take them to the vet

rather than have some sort of back of the van situation for a snip snap. Unless they're a vet in a van. Yeah. I don't know what de-sexing a cat involves. Well, I think it's harder if it's a female. Sounds like someone's got something to YouTube over the next song then. How to de-sex a cat. 20 past six.

No, I'm not teasing the next thing. How to de-sex a cat. Oh 6 I'm not teasing the next thing How to de-sex a cat Oh no it's photos You can't just do it yourself I watched my pigs get de-sexed That was pretty intense The balls get removed And then the tubes tied up The cats have balls?

Yes Imagine a cat But they just stick out the back, don't they? Yeah, they stick out the back. Have you never? Like a pig. Hang on, cat with balls. Our pig's balls, I don't know if they would have dropped significantly,

but they kind of poke out the back. Oh, yes, I've seen. They look like a butt cheek. They're so stupid. Get rid of them. Do cats back into each other? I don't know. Yeah.

Okay, that's good. Little tiny furry balls. Honestly, if you're up for a giggle this morning, please Google cats with balls. Next on the show. I'm on my work laptop too. You've been flagged by IT and it's not even seven. I know.

A 15-year-old has done something pretty extraordinary. He's travelled a long way all on his own. We're all gagging to get back overseas, aren't we? We were talking about it this morning. We'd love to be in Thailand. I'd love to be anywhere. Well, this humid weather is reminding us of Thailand. Reminding us of Thailand.

Well, people are getting impatient, especially in countries like Australia, New Zealand, who have been locked down a lot of the time and isolated and the borders have been closed. And of course, Australia opened up their borders recently, the international borders. And one 15-year-old, Hugo Beavis. Got to be hard at high school with a name like that. Hugo Beavis. I hope he doesn't have a friend called Butt-Head.

He wouldn't know. He's 15 years old. He doesn't know what Beavis and Butt-Head is. Anyway, he got sick of waiting. And so he had saved up all of the money that he got from his job at McDonald's and walking his neighbor's dog. Show sponsor. Show sponsor.

Not the dog walking, but McDonald's. And he bought a flight. McDonald's better watch themselves. The dog walkers will swoop in for a show. They've got a big money. Got a lot of money. Show sponsorship. Yeah.

He bought a flight, a $1,000 Australian dollar return fare with Singapore Airlines to London. And he just left. That's cheap, isn't it? Yeah. Oh, my God. I know. Imagine $1,000 return to London. And he left on his own.

This 15-year-old got on a flight and went to London. Had a solo trip. Saw the sights. Hopped on the London Eye. How long was he there for? I think only a couple of weeks. Would your parents have let you go to London by yourself when you were 15? When I was 16 I came up to Auckland from

Wellington with a group of friends to go to Taste of Chaos. You were always with your friends, right? Yeah, always with my friends, but my mum came as our chaperone. She didn't trust you. Did Patsy disguise herself as like a 16-year-old emo? Emo chick in the marsh. Yeah. She didn't quite go that far,

but she did notice when we topped up the vodka with water. That's absolute crime. She knew instantly. Where did you get, did Did you What do you mean? My mum had a bottle of vodka Your mum bought a bottle of vodka? Yeah for herself She's not going to be in Auckland

With like 16 With like 16 teenagers Where did you stay? My dad's friend has an apartment in Auckland So we stayed there The rest of us had to stay in some scummy backpack As if we went anywhere No no no

It was near the Hilton Oh. It was near the Hilton. Oh, God. It was near the Hilton on the waterfront. Right. But yeah, she came. She came and stayed. Because I would never have been allowed to even travel to Auckland on my own.

I was only allowed to go to Big Day Out on my own when I was like 17, maybe? And even then you would have been with friends, right? Even then I had friends that she knew. Yeah. And our parents had made plans together about what we were doing, where we were staying. Because, yeah, I remember you'd go away, but it was always with friends.

Always with friends. Yeah, and so your parents would be like, all right, well, you're with your friends. That's fine. Yeah, I couldn't imagine. My parents weren't like that because we were a bunch of dickheads. My parents were like, if you mess up, you're never going away again. You guys are a bunch of dickheads.

I'll let you go, but if you stuff it up. You're out. Would they have even let you go on a plane by yourself? I would never. Around the country? I don't know because I never had ambition to even be like, I want to fly to Wellington for the weekend. They would have been like, what for?

Let alone solo to London. Yeah. London's scary. I've Googled you unaccompanied minors, 5 to 11, for example. I've just Googled Australia. So this is one from Virgin. It says 12 to 15, you can travel by yourself. 12?

Imagine sending your 12-year-old off with no... I don't know if you could go international 12. I don't know if this is domestic. I don't know. But yeah, so he was able to go by himself. On his own. And he just bought his own ticket and everything. And he paid for it as well.

How much money did he save from McDonald's? Because he would have had to have spending money. London's not cheap. Where did he stay? I've got so many questions. And they're not in the article. I reckon he just full Paddington Baird it. Just turned up at a train station with a little suitcase

that said, I like marmalade sandwiches. Just hope for the best. His parents were like, he's an idiot, but you can't stop him. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the Top Six. Hello there.

Potato milk. Yuck. Potato milk is the new milk alternative set to dominate cafes. I mean, we grow potatoes, don't we? Yeah, we do, yeah. And look at all the milking sheds. I just can't see how this is going to taste nice. Neither.

Neither. Neither or neither? You went to a private school, so is it neither? Neither. Neither. Neither. Neither nor, either or. I say neither. Either or neither. Do you say neither? Neither. Neither. Neither. Neither nor, either or. Either or, neither. Do you say neither?

I say neither. Neither do I. No, I say neither do I. I don't know. Oh, now I'm confused. Either or. Either or. Okay, it all works. It all works. Literally, we're talking about potato. Someone's going to message in. Like the other day when we said Z instead of Zed.

Yeah. Are you Americans now? It instead of Zed. Yeah. How are you Americans now? It is not Zed. You do not go T-U-V-W-X-Y and Zed. It just makes the whole song not rhyme. Zed, now I know my ABC. Next time, won't you sing with Med? Well, you could make it rhyme that way. Yeah.

I like Z better than Zed if I can't remember the rhymes. Z-M. Way more than Zed. You're listening to Z-M. That's how that way. Yeah. I like Z better than Zeta for the con. Yeah, same. Rhymes are way more... You're listening to Z. You're listening to ZM. That's our American musicians when they get asked to record a thing saying, Hey, I'm a little John. Sure. Hello, everyone.

I'm little John. And you are listening to New Zealand's ZM. That's exactly how his one went, by the way. Imagine if Jay-Z changed his name to Jay-Zed. Just to appease. Just to appease the masses. The people, the British. Well, anyway, potatoes, which I believe is the correct pronunciation,

adding to the milk game. Okay. It's a Swedish company. Oh, yuck. When I went blah, I licked my microphone. So that's how I die. Yeah. A Swedish company came up with the idea

and apparently a British supermarket's stocking it. Oh. Apparently the CEO of Potatoes New Zealand, which is a role that I must have. I simply must become CEO of Potatoes. Do you think he walks into a fish and chip shop and he's like, I'm the CEO of Potatoes. God damn it, I want chips.

Gives a scoop. Yeah. Chris Claridge, which isn't nearly Irish enough sounding for me. No. Chris Claridge. Patrick O'Flaherty. Yeah. I'm Patrick O'Flaherty, CEO of Potatoes.

But he said it could be made here. Right. We'd like to make it, he said. It sounds wonderful. Of course he'd say that as a CEO of potatoes. He's a big potato. Yeah. It's a technical process to make potato milk.

Dehydrated potatoes are turned into a liquid and then emulsified with grapeseed oil. What? It's not as simple as squashing potatoes and getting liquid out. Oh, okay. No, that's potato juice. Yeah, yeah. Not to be confused with potato milk. Potato milk is twice as good environmentally as oat milk

because it only needs half the land to get the equivalent amount of oat milk, and potato's pretty hearty. Okay. So anyway, with that in mind, the top six other milks of the future. Number six, twink milk. Remember twink, not twinks. I was like, that's...

You're not milking young twinks. Do you still have the pens? I'm saying twink as in the pens, yeah. It's already a white liquid, so it's halfway there. I like the way it smells. Would you brush things like your pencil case? Yes, I used to do my fingernails. With twink? With twink. So it's halfway there. I like the way it smells. Would you brush things like your pencil case? Yes. I used to do my fingernails.

With twink. With twink. You know, you said the way it smells, which immediately made me think about Fletch sniffing Vivids. Yeah. Whiteboard markers. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. Indy, our daughter, recently 10, came out to dinner last night

and she had a black mark on her nose. I'm like, what's this from? And she's like, huh? I was like, look in the mirror. What's that from? She's like, oh, I was smelling that Vivid. Have you ever smelt a Vivid? I'm like what's this from and she's like huh i was like look in the mirror what's that from she's like i was smelling that vivid have you ever smelt a vivid i'm like yes yes and she's like i quite like that i was like you don't anymore that's our new rule you can't sniff vivid why not i was like it's really really bad for you oh and she's like oh okay i wasn't like

like i just sent oh yeah i was, yeah, okay, no more. No more of that. Number five on the list of the top six milks of the future are vape milk. Everyone loves vaping. Yeah, they do. Why not have a little vape on your corneas? Vape milk. It would smell nice, wouldn't it?

It would smell like apple or honeycomb or something. Number four on the list of the top six milks of the future, PVA glue milk. Oh, yum. It's already pretty much milk. Don't they use PVA in commercials for milk sometimes to make it all cereal? Yeah, they do. Yeah, they do. It has played the part of milk.

It's milk's understudy. Oh, wow. So we could do some more stuff to it and make it completely drinkable. Number three on the list of the top six milks of the future, it's another one, paint milk. And then you can go in and you're like, can I have one litre of half white or can I have one litre of black white? There are so many white paints.

So many white paints. I never knew that. So many colours and so many flavours for milk going forward. Number two on the list of the top six milks of the future, we've all heard of coconut milk, but what about the other white nut milk? Walnut milk.

I don't know if it's possible. Why not? Well, they're milking every other nut, aren't they? Totally milk. Cashew. That's a very oil. Pistachio milk is a thing.

Is it? Is it? That must be so expensive. Pistachio milk. Yeah. Yeah, it's lightly green. Kind of want to try that. I feel like it would be a good dessert.

You can make walnut milk. I feel like it would be really fatty. Yum. It's an oily old nut, the old walnut. Tastes. And number one on the list of the top six milks of the future, Jif milk. Are you just naming white things? Yeah, pretty much.

Pretty much white liquids. A little bit grainy, that one. Gritty milk. Gritty. But get the job done. Don't need to clean your teeth either. No, it would spoil you at the teeth. Yes, wonderful idea.

Don't, though. Don't. Don't drink any of those. Wait till it's in milk form. Yeah. Not chiff as it stands. That is today's top six. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley.

Back with Funny Bone. I'm not going to cry on here. Oh, anyway, Apple. Apple has a new, well, they're working on a new feature. It's going to be released later this year. It's called Tap to Pay. And what it means is like businesses can just have their iPhone. So if you're at a market stall or like a shop or whatever, instead of having PayWave, you can just like tap phone to phone,

iPhone to iPhone, and money will go through. Isn't that crazy? Well, sometimes if you're at a market or somewhere like that, they've got that thing they plug in or a little. Into their phone. Yeah, yeah. But no, that's still like a pay wave or a swipe your card or, you know. That's not just phone to phone. That's not straight phone to phone.

No, no, yeah. That's card to device to phone. Yeah. And send those out, eh? You had to apply for one from your bank. I imagine this will be like, you know, when you double clerk and then your visa comes up and you go like that and it will just go straight into their account via their phone.

Right. So at the moment it's just for businesses, but I imagine you'll be able to do it in the future, like you and me could just like tap phones and I'll just take all your money. Because that's what Venmo is in the States, right? Yeah, Venmo me. Yeah.

It's just like a really quick way of... Which is great if you're out for dinner. And you know when you have a BYO and there's like 10 of you? And they're like single bill. Yes. And then so one person could pay and then you could just quickly all pay that one person. Yeah, as opposed to like the Monday following being like,

hey guys, I'm really going to need that $33.50. Yeah. I shouted 20 people $33.50. And also three people haven't owned up to the garlic bread or the corkage fee. Susie, I saw you honing that and you haven't put your hand up. So I've just allocated $2 of that to you. I know you smuggled in a hip flask and you were just ordering cans of Coke and pouring it in. But everybody saw you doing that.

There's corkage. Producer Jared apparently has an idea for this. They should call it tap-le-pay. So instead of tap-to-pay. Tap-le-pay. Tap-le-pay. Apple and tap. And then you merge the two words together for tap-le.

I'm glad we went to Producer Jared then. That's a really good start. You'd be able to go to shops and be like, do you guys have tap-le? It sounds like schnapple. Was it schna have Tapple? It sounds like Schnapple. Was it Schnapple, the apple drink? Schnapple. Schnapple.

No, Schnapps is one thing and Schnapple was another. Can't we already do this now, though? Like easily transfer between friends. Don't some banks do that? Yeah, you can text. Oh, yeah. You just text to their phone number, eh? I just do the old school payments on the banking app.

Yeah. And copy and paste. And you pay, eh? I like to actually go into the bank and make an in-person transaction. I write out the form. Yes. I like to write them out a check at the end of the night. Yeah, that'd be good because who could be bothered cashing the check?

Yeah, they'll just throw it in the bin. Yeah, they'll lose the cheque. Yeah, yeah. And you'll be like, oh, can you wait a couple of weeks to cash that? I don't even think they do that anymore. Do cheques exist? I think they're all gone now, aren't they? Do you know why mum used to write a cheque at the supermarket?

Yeah, mum used to write a cheque at the supermarket and do the line, line. Line, line. Non-transferable, but they just scribbled up in that corner and it became known as non-transferable. Kids, if you're listening and you've got no idea what we're talking about, boy oh boy, the supermarket used to be ages at mum writing out the check.

Oh, I know. She had to write out the numbers and then she had to write out the numbers in words. Like if it was $258.34, she had to write two, T-W-O, hundred.

Oh my God. It's a wild ride. And you're just standing there like, Mim, Mim. $50 only. You had to write only at the end so no one added more. Oh my god And you're just standing there like Meme Meme Chocolate man Only You had to write only at the end So no one added More money

And then you Did scribbles so that And then you had the stub That you had to then write What it was For when you were doing your books Wild times Wild times

Bring them back I reckon And credit cards Yeah Didn't used to be Yeah they used to get this machine out and put it on the bench and put your credit card on it and like a chunk, chunk if you've wondered why

even now the numbers and everything are raised. Because they wouldn't even need the raised numbers now would they? No. It's printed on. Not embossed is it? It's the opposite. Embossed is like they popped out. They had that when I worked in retail only printed on. Not embossed, is it? It's the opposite. Embossed is like dented in. I just raised. They had that

when I worked in retail only, oh no, that was 14 years ago. I remember F Pons was down one day and they were like, these,

I can't remember where it was but there was a young person on the checkout and they were like, we just don't know what to do, we don't know what to do, do you have cash?

I was like, nah, we don't have cash and she's like, Karen, Linda, help. And this old lady comes out with this thing and she's like, we just don't know what to do. We don't know what to do. Do you have cash? I was like, nah, we don't have cash. And she's like, Karen, Linda, help. And this old lady comes out with this thing and she's like, and drops in front of the kid and the kid's like, I don't know what that is. And she's like, watch and learn.

Load in the carbon paper, put it in, shonk, shonk. This kid was just like. They wouldn't even do that now, would they? They'd just make you go to the ATM and get cash or just suck it up. Automatic bank transfer. I've done that in a shop before. I've literally gone into my internet banking and gone like, there you go.

See the transaction. And then cancel it when you leave? Yeah, and then I'm like, reverse payment. Bye, thanks for the call. Breathing. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Nobody enjoys the process of ageing, especially not Vaughan at Hayley. Play ZM. Nobody enjoys the process of ageing,

especially not Vaughan at the moment, 10 days away from turning 40. I hear my back's just curling me. You've been on the floor for most of the morning. Yeah, I've had a floor roll. Yep, you've been to the physio, you've been to a shaman, haven't you? Though I haven't been to the shaman yet.

Oh, okay. But if proof comes back I'm refutable proof that it's my evil deeds That have manifested themselves directly at the base of my spine Then you'll see the shaman then I'll get a karma session at the shaman Right okay But you've had people poking around and prodding your back

Yep Physio, osteo, all the O's Yeah right So you're, instead of 40 being the new 30, your 40 is feeling 70 odd. Feeling a bit 70 odd-ish. Yeah. Well, you're not included in this study then. There's

been a survey done looking, interviewing over 60s. Okay. This is in the UK. And nearly half of them are saying, they're insisting that 60 is the new 40. They took a, on average, people aged 60 or over in this survey feel at least 12 years, five months younger than their actual age.

Wow, okay. 22% of them claim to be 20 years younger, and 46% insist they feel more sprightly and more able right now than their parents did at the same age. I totally get that because my parents seem younger than my grandparents did at the same age. Yeah. And have you ever seen photos of your great-grandparents

when they were like 50 and they looked 80? Yes. Yeah, right. Like, yeah, there's photos of my great-grandparents and it was, you know. But maybe you'd look older if your photos were black and white. But totally. It's black and white. And the fact that they're always,

any time that someone got a photo, a camera out, they were like, wait a minute, I've got to put on a three-piece suit. Yeah. Don't take any photos until I'm back in my suit. They all got dressed up for any sort of photo or occasion. So it was all like, they looked really old in days. And they worked outside and they didn't wear sunblock like we wear sunblock. Yeah, no sunblock.

Well, they didn't have a lot of chain gyms either, did they? Yeah, and not a lot of oil of Olay. Yeah. That's the thing that's missing. And they loved ciggies. Oh, they loved cigars. Oh, man, they loved pipes, they loved ciggies, they loved cigars. And the doctors told them it was good for them.

Yeah. And they are. People are living longer now. Yeah. And they are. People are living longer now. Yeah. Well, this research suggests that old age used to be aligned with when you started getting the pension or retirement age around 60 to 65. They're saying it now starts old age when you're 76. Yeah, I kind of get that.

My parents are both 60, 61. Yeah. And they're definitely not old. They've never seemed old to me. They haven't hit that kind of like, oh, my parents are getting old. Yeah. You know?

Yeah, totally. Well, this is good. So what does that make me? Am I in my 20s still? Am I a sprightly 20-year-old? Yeah. Are you feeling 20 years younger? Me?

Yeah. No. Not at all. Not applying.. Are you feeling 20 years younger? Me? Yeah. No. Not at all. Not applying. What about you, Fletch? Are you a sprightly 20-year-old? I'm ready for one of those old people beds

that in the morning you press the button on the remote and it sits you up. And so you just have to turn sideways and get out of bed. And somebody's made you a breakfast or a dinner that's mushy. Yes! Oh my God, take me to the ramen. Wow. Today's silly little poll poll we asked you on Instagram. It is silly, isn't it?

Is it okay for your partner to follow models on Instagram? Maybe we should have asked different categories, like New Zealand local models or international models. Or hot girls down the road. Hot girls that they saw at the flat down the road. A girl I went to high school with who is now a model. 76% of respondees said, yeah, of course. Did you say respondees or respondents? It's respondents.

I was playing it up a little bit. Responders. First responders. 76% of respondents said said yeah, of course. 24% said nope, no way. That's quite a high percentage actually for people being like no. Yeah. Especially if it's just an overseas model that's so unattainable.

Yeah. Like your partner's never got a chance in hell. Yeah, it's cute that Steve thinks he stands a chance. Yeah, exactly. Like some Victoria's Secret model is going to fly into Auckland and then Steve goes, hey, well. I follow you, and she's like, well, let's have sex then, Steve. I follow a lot of hot, hot hotties strictly because they're hotties

on my Instagram. Jason Momoa, is that one of your faves? Because he's a unit, isn't he? Oh, my God, he's an absolute unit. What's his thing? Gypsy. Pride of gypsies. Let's have a look what he's a unit, isn't he? Oh, my God. He's an absolute unit. What's his thing? Gypsy. Pride of gypsies. Let's have a look what he's up to.

Is he riding his motorboat without a helmet on again? I'm going to worry about him. Because would you look after him if he had a motorcycle accident and he became a vegetable? I'd look after him, as in, like, switchy-doo. Switch it off, yeah. You know what I mean? Have you guys had that conversation with your family before

About at what point You know, let me go Yeah, same You've got a tattoo, don't you Do not resuscitate You've got one in place already Under any circumstance, do not resuscitate Now I've got a pretty watertight

Contract with my parents About smothering them with a pillow But making it look like they passed naturally. Yeah. Yeah. Same with my in-laws. They don't know about it, but it's in place. It's in place.

Yeah. I mean, I don't want our inheritance being drained by, you know, high-end care bills. Retirement village, sure. Yeah. I'm not paying for the... Luxury, though. It's got to be luxury. Yeah. I'm not paying for the... Luxury, though. It's got to be luxury. Yeah.

Some messages in. Shay says, I don't care if they follow, like, or comment on an InstaModels page, as long as they're way out of your league. Yes. But don't let me catch you liking some girl you went to school with in a G-string bikini. Yes.

That would be a fair call, right? Olivia says, My boyfriend reckons he follows Emily Ratajkowski because she posts about insightful things and mostly just read her posts. Well, Vaughan, you also follow her. How insightful is she? Well...

She's had a baby? She's more insightful than you probably think. Okay, yeah. I think she's quite a clever girl. Good on you for being a clever girl. That sounded real condescending. But she's not, she's not like an airhead by any means. You justify it however you want.

She's extremely attractive. Yeah. But she's also like posts a lot of interesting. Oh, Hayley, why are you screwing up your face? I'm just looking, I just went on Emily Ratajkowski's Instagram page. She is stunning. No doubt about it.

But she's also one in eight Jillian. So don't compare yourself. There's just a photo of her last year at some fashion awards. That's just after she had a baby, right? She's got like the most sort of cut. Yeah. Yeah, she bounced back quick. Don't worry about that.

That's not... Don't compete yourself. Don't compete yourself. Don't you do yourself. I haven't had a baby. Grace said, he's already punching. Oh, my partner's already punching.

No way he thinks Mia Khalifa will be DTF with him. Okay, he's not following a model. He's following someone who's done pornographic. Oh my God. I love that all the women are like someone who's done pornographic. Oh, my God. I love that all the women are like, go for it, babe. Yeah, good luck if you can.

Gemma says, what's he going to do? DM them both fall madly in love? Leave me? Run away together? Pfft, you're dreaming. So basically, we're fine with, or women seem to be fine with men, their male counterparts following Instagram models because they know that they...

Out of their league. Way out of their league. They're never going to have a chance. Oh, look at this. Bailey message. My missus was watching when I looked at this, so don't count my vote. So Bailey voted, no, it's not okay,

but that was only because they were being watched. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, Candice said, I rip on him every time he opens Instagram and there's some half-naked chickie at the top. I'm like, what would Anne think if you opened that in front of her aunt's mother?

Well, there you go. You can follow away, but just know that it's never going to happen. Yeah, the vast majority of people. 76% said, follow away, babe, because it's never going to happen in this lifetime. Next on the show, guys, I don't know if you've seen the news. A lot of things dominated the headlines, COVID-related protests, etc.

The weather. But quite a bit of fridge news coming in on the news channels overnight. That's good. That's a nice change. A warning if you've got an old fridge in the garage. That's me. And somebody's come up with a definitive list of what should and shouldn't be in the fridge.

If you're going to say eggs belong in the pantry, I'm leaving. Tomato sauce? In the fridge! I think things could get quite heated next. Yesterday,

a Consumer New Zealand report came out warning about old fridges in the garage. You know, you have an old fridge in the garage. It used to be the main fridge or it was your parents' old fridge. Yeah. And it's in there because you keep your beers in there, maybe some fridge overflow. Yep.

Free some meat. Well, depending on how old the fridge is, an example, they use a 20-year-old fridge in the garage just as a spare fridge can use up to $200 extra power a year. Worth it. Absolutely. Pay twice that for a cold beer. But you've got it. Your fridge is, like, so full.

Last time I was at your house, I was trying to find some room to put something in. It's a double-door, massive fridge, and it is, like, packed. Yeah, but we're a family. I know, I know. That's why, like, yeah, we always had a massive packed fridge at home growing up. People would come around and be like, good God. And my mum was just like, yeah, but look at these teenage boys. These big boys.

Yeah, we'd be in the lounge on our second bag of biscuits and be like, are you ready, Brad? We're a toxic sandwich, man. Do you have a lightly packed fridge, Fletch? You shop every day. But yeah, I shop every couple of days, so I don't have a lot of stuff, Fletch? You shop every day. But yeah, I shop every couple of days, so I don't have a lot of stuff in my fridge. Yeah, no.

Like condiments and all that kind of stuff. Condoms? Condiments. Keep them cold. No, that's not good. Is it not good? Keep them chilled. No, I thought not in the glove box.

Not in your wallet. Definitely not in your wallet or the glove box. I don't know about the fridge. No. No, condiments and like eggs and stuff? Condiments. What's in my fridge? I'm really bad at doing a big shop.

Yeah. And then chucking out half a drawer full of vegetables. Wasteful, wasteful. Floppy, soggy carrots. Do you have a spare fridge though? Yeah, we've got a beer fridge in the garage. Right. But do you use it all the time?

Yes, chocker. But why don't you just have a few beers and wine in the main fridge? I don't think you know how quickly we consume alcohol. Yeah, I think you do. Well, that's a warning from consumer. And also, more fridge news overnight. Thank God. So much fridge news.

I know, it's everywhere. The things to have in the fridge and not. This comes from an article in the UK. By the way, you can totally keep a condom in the fridge. I just Googled condom temperature range as long as it never goes below zero degrees Celsius. Would it feel nice? No, not in the freezer. Certainly not in the freezer.

But sitting in a moderate, maybe four degrees in the fridge. Slightly chilling before it heats up to body temperature, I'm not sure. That could be an interesting roll on. Could slow the process, calm things down. To fridge or not fridge, bread. No, it goes so dry. Oh my God, when I first started dating fiancé Aaron, he would put

fridge in the bread all the time. He put fridge in the bread? Fridge in the bread. Bread in the fridge. Bread in the fridge. Bread in the fridge and it would go so dry. So they say if you're only going to toast it, you're probably fine. No, put it in the freezer. Yeah, put it in the freezer and it would go so dry. So they say if you're only going to toast it, you're probably fine. No, put it in the freezer. Yeah, put it in the freezer. And break it off as you need it.

Snap it off. You've got to chisel a slice off in the morning. But yeah, they say keeping bread in the fridge makes the starch molecules crystallise so the bread toughens and it dries out. So it's lousy for sandwiches. At a pinch, you could toast it. But yeah, they say if you're going to use your bread quickly. You need a bread bin.

You need a bread bin or leave it on the- With a roller door. Did you have a bread bin with a roller door growing up? God, they were a bit posh. We didn't have one, though. Eggs. Fridge.

Or- Because you always get the eggs. Pantry. Is it America? Eggs in America, you always get them in the chilled section. Yeah, but not in New Zealand.

Whereas in New Zealand, they're always in the oils. They last longer when they're chilled, right? But if you get fresh eggs, we'll just get them in the chilled section. Whereas in New Zealand, they're always in the oils. They last longer when they're chilled, right? But if you get fresh eggs, we'll just get them from the chickens and then just in the pantry, we don't refrigerate them. Yeah, I'm a fridge girl. Yeah, they say keeping eggs

in the fridge extends their life from around two weeks to two months. Two months? I wouldn't eat a two month old egg. But then they also say cold eggs, and I know this, if you're going to do baking like a cake, you leave the eggs out. Room temp. Room temp eggs. Yeah. Jam? Fridge. Yeah, same fridge.

Yeah, fridge. We'll go mouldy. But they say that there's so much. That's an ants thing for us though. Ants. Oh, do they come in? Get a bit of jam around the lid. Get a little bit of jam dribble. Ants will absolutely move into the cupboard. Well, they say that it can actually say out of the cupboard because it's got so much crap in it. Right. That it would last. Doesns will absolutely move into the cupboard. Well, they say that it can actually say out of the cupboard because it's got so much crap in it that it would last.

Doesn't have to be refrigerated. Sauce, ketchup, tomato sauce. Got to go in the fridge. Yeah, we're fridge on the sauce again because of like just ants. Right. Apparently spice levels, taste could fall if it goes in the fridge, but they're saying that it's fine to go in the fridge, but it's perfectly safe if it's not.

Wow. I would never put my sauce in the pantry. but they're saying that it's fine to go in the fridge, but it's perfectly safe if it's not. Wow. I would never put my sauce in the pantry. Here's one. Tomatoes. Fridge. It's a vegetable. Fridge or not. Well, no, apparently tomatoes never put firm tomatoes in the fridge.

It stops the flavor developing. Oh, yeah, that's true. And gives them a mealy texture. Right. It's because if we buy cherry tomatoes from the supermarket, they go in the fridge, but fresh tomatoes from the garden live on the bench. Yeah. Wow, really?

Potatoes? Pantry, dark pantry. Yeah, that's what... So then if you don't get to them, they start growing those little creepy roots and then you can plant them. Yeah, because they go soggy. Same with bananas.

You'd never put... No, absolutely not. Onions? Only if you cut one and you're keeping a little bit for later yeah because that will just stink out the pantry yeah well i'm on board with most of these other than sauce in the pantry get a grip the the one they haven't put on the list is um you know when people have butter in the pantry no but i get it no you can get those butter bells it doesn't do anything though it's just a dairy product no i know if it's cheese or cream if you't do anything though. It's a dairy product. You can't leave cheese or cream.

If you get a butter bell, you know what a butter bell is. Yeah. So you put the butter in there and then you plonk it upside down on a plate and it seals it. And it means the butter's spreadable. Does it seal it though?

But it's all warm and stuff. Stick it in the microwave for 10 seconds. From the fridge. We'll get one of those semi-soft. You would never put a bottle of cream in the pantry. Do you go semi-soft? Always go semi-soft. A spreadable.

Yeah, I love a spreadable. But not that spreadable that's spreadable because it's got canola in it. Too much canola in it. That's what I don't like. How did it become spreadable? You tipped on towards margarine there, friend. Don't even mention that word around me. Margarine.

Well, you went to a private school. You probably never grew up with margarine. No, we were an Olivani family Oh the posh margarine What was the one with the sun on it? Sunrise Was sunrise a margarine? I don't know if it was posh

No I'm saying it wasn't the posh one Oliviano was the posh one Oliviano Or there was just straight up table spread It wasn't even good enough to call it South Marjorie. No. We don't know what's in that, yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

We're talking about whether or not you should arrive at someone's house unannounced. And this is coming on the back of a bit of an odd story from the UK. There was a couple of friends and one of them came across fresh flowers. Okay. And so she texted her friend and said, hey, you've got these beautiful fresh flowers. Would you like a bunch of them? And the friend was like, oh, my God, I would love that. That's so nice.

I'm home at five. Come drop them around. And the girl said, I'm actually going to be passing around your house in about 30 minutes. Why don't I drop them over? She said, well, I'm not home, but just pop them on the porch the girl said, I'm actually going to be passing around your house in about 30 minutes. Why don't I drop them over? She said, well, I'm not home, but just pop them on the porch. She said, great. Anyway, the friend with the flowers got to the house

and it was raining, bucketing with rain. Right. And then she remembered she had a key for emergencies to her friend's house. Okay. So she let herself in, popped the flowers down, and then left.

And then about a few hours later, when her friend got home, she got a text from her saying, thanks for the flowers, but why did you let yourself into my house? That key's for emergency zone. So she arranged them nicely in a vase. Yeah, no, she just popped them on the table. Right. Inside.

And then, yeah, got this sort of defensive text from her friend. So she went to online being like, have I done something wrong here by letting myself in? And it's a bit of a mixed response. People saying like, no, you don't ever let yourself into someone else's house. You don't know. It could be an absolute mess. They could have their bloody personal swing set up in the lounge that they

haven't dismantled. But then if your friend's close enough to give them a key, I'm imagining they're close enough to be like, oh, I saw your sex swing. Hee hee hee. Yeah. Hope you had a great night. Hee hee hee. Like, you've got a key to my house. My apartment, Vaughan. Yep. For emergencies. Correct.

If you were dropping something off and you were just like, I just let myself in and put it in there, I wouldn't care. But without, like, so even if Vaughn didn't say, hey,

just letting myself in or something. No, I wouldn't care. Well, this woman did. I think I wouldn't care either. If it was a friend

who was close enough to have a key for emergencies, which a couple of our friends do. Yep. I'd be like, oh yeah, okay. Yeah,

some people are just, if people are coming around to their house, everything's got to be spotless and perfect. Just so. And they get quite anxious about that. It's like people, and this is what got us on to talking about this, is when people just turn up. Unannounced. To someone's house.

Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock. Yeah. Hi. We were just around the corner. I thought we'd say hi. And you're like. Hi. That's my wife's worst nightmare.

I hate that. Even if I'm like, oh, someone's coming around. She's like, when? I'm like, I don't know, half an hour. She's like. Yeah. Sometimes I've just turned up with Vaughn and it hasn't gone down well. Oh, really?

But I don't care. That house is a mess. The house isn't a mess. The house is never in a mess. No. And even if it was, I wouldn't care. Yeah. Like, I'm not there to judge.

I haven't had a chance to light the candles. It is slightly different, though, if you've, like, I have this, like, if you've turned up with Vaughn and Sade's like, why didn't you mention that? Fletcher's coming around. Yeah. It's one thing. But if you just turned up and Vaughn wasn't there

and it was just Sade and you're like, hi, it's even worse, I reckon. You've got no kind of, no warning. Right. Oh, yeah, tuning up on it. But I remember as a kid, we'd just be driving somewhere and Dad's like, oh, so-and-so lives around here. All right, that's their house. And we'd just pull into their driveway.

And as a kid, I was just like, this is wild. Yeah. This is wild. And then we, yeah, in the country, we had a long driveway and we were on the hill. So you'd see cars come out the driveway. You'd be like, Dad, in the country, we had a long driveway and we were on the hill. So you'd see cars coming at the driveway. You'd be like, Dad, car's coming! And he'd be like, oh, who is it?

And he'd try to work out who it was. And then these people would stay all afternoon. And you're like, where was the forewarning? Yeah, and do they bring anything? Do they bring a slice to share? Yeah. But then bringing a slice, A, you've bought something, but B, it's presumptuous that you're staying.

But also you've probably sorted out what you're going to do for the day. Say it's a Saturday. You know what you're going to do, right, roughly. Yeah, even if it is like I don't want to talk to anyone and I'm just going to be on the couch in my knickers all day. And then your friend just knocks on the door. I can't stand that. Actually, that happened the other day.

Someone knocked at the door and I was like on the couch. And then by our door is a window into the lounge and I was laying on the couch in my undies and I sprung up. Who was it? It was my neighbour. Oh, yeah. Dropping off some wine.

Right. But, you know, you need a bit of an announcement, don't you? We asked Instagram, showing up to someone's house without warning, question mark, 78% said nah. Don't do it.

I think these days you can text, right? It's so much easier to make contact with people. Hey, we're around the corner. Yeah. Previously, it would be a mobile phone call to a landline and your dad's not paying $2.49 a minute. He'll just turn up and save himself $2.49. Exactly.

When are you going to pop around to Executive Internania's house when you're in the neighbourhood? Yeah. When was that? A couple of weekends ago. Not often we find ourselves halfway to Whangarei, but we were. And I said to Sade, Executive Intern Anya lives around here somewhere. And she said, what are you talking, what are you suggesting?

I said, I'm suggesting we pop in. We haven't seen their house yet and I suggest we pop in. And Sade's like, absolutely not. She won't do it because she hates it when people do it to us. Right. But you would have been welcoming,'d imagine absolutely yes always ready yeah are you a hostess yeah i would have had mint slices i would have had some mint treats ready major coffee yep you're always welcome so you're a-okay with this i'm fine with that i would prefer like a 10-minute text if you were like well i way. Well, I would have heads up because I needed a confirmation of address.

That too, yeah. And we were down the road, so I reckon if I'd messaged, it would have been at least 10 minutes. How long does it take to dismantle a swing though? Oh, honestly. I won't have done it a few times. And you can't get it through the doorway, so you've got to dismantle. I think the only reason you would be able to show up unannounced

at someone's house is if you were literally busting to weasel poos. And you'd be like, hey, sorry, I have to use your toilet. See, even then I'd probably rather public toilet it. What if there wasn't one around? In a bush. I couldn't turn up to somebody's house for the sole purpose of relieving myself. Oh, my God, I'm busting, can I go to the toilet?

And you're like, oh, yeah, and you rush in there and they're like, oh no, it's not poos, is it? Yeah, get out. It's poos. Yeah. The University of Kansas has done a study looking into hookup culture, as they are calling it.

How they did it was they took the usual rhetoric around dating, the traditional date night script where a man asks a woman out, pays for their meal and then initiates sex. That's the script that they followed and they compared it to the

participants' most recent dating experience and showed that actually that traditional sort of version of it only accounts for about 36% of the time that people go on dates. And what it discovered was a number of things about dating culture. 90% of dates are initiated by men still. However, those hookups are far less likely nowadays to end in sexy times

than if the woman initiated the date. So if the woman initiated the date, 63% of the time, it ended in a bit of hanky-panky. Okay. Is that because they were keen from the outset? They're like, this guy's for me. I guess so. I'm into this.

They hold the key to the kingdom. They do hold the key to the kingdom. Maybe it's, you You know there's been A lot in the last few years About consent And so maybe it's You know like people Sort of

Being more female driven In the heterosexual Dating scene Yeah Apps like Bumble The woman has to Do the initiating Yeah

Rather than the man But yeah I mean I think that old Traditional Sort of style of dating Yeah do the initiating rather than the man. Yeah, I mean, I think that old traditional sort of style of dating, yeah, no one does that, do they? Do men still pay for dinner? In a heterosexual thing? Would you expect the man to, would you just expect to go Harvey's? Absolutely Harvey's. Most would just expect to go Harvey's, wouldn't they?

Yeah. Or like you pay for food, I'll pay for drinks. I'm ordering cocktails. It's been a while. It's been a while, but I always remember in the dating world there seemed to be some reluctance from the females that I dated anyway to really go nuts when you're eating. So that was probably one of the reasons I knew I'd found my one with Sharts

is we went out for dinner and she ate. Yeah. And we continue. We eat. When we go out, we eat. You had the wood-fired pizza debacle, didn't you? I don't know if you know about that. I don't.

First date, wood-fired pizza. No expense spared. Wow. Not even a Domino's. A wood-fired. Wood-fired. We watch it be cooked in the wood fired pizza place. This is on Victoria Street in Hamilton.

I don't know if it was still there and I don't think it was called Baduzzi, but for some reason Baduzzi's popping into my head. Baduzzi. What's Baduzzi? I don't know. No, that's not right. That's on K Road, isn't it? Or is that Baducci?

It had a posh name and a posh pizza oven, and I said, knock yourself out, and you order what you want. I got this. And then there was no second date. It was wood-fired pizza. I was like 20 and earning nothing, and I showed this gal that I'm beginning to think wood-fired pizza's not enough

to make up for this awful personality. Oh, my God, that's horrible. I know. I thought it worked really well. It definitely wasn't the pizza. Yeah, but I don't think I'd give 20-year-old me a second date either. No. As 39-year-old, nearly 40-year-old me,

I wouldn't go on a second date with 20-year-old me. I'd have been like, this guy's a dick. Yeah. Plus, he keeps going on about wood-fired pizza. We get it, buddy. He loves the burnt crust. We get it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

Play ZM. ZM's Add to Cart. But it is time for Add to Cart, and we're going to add the first item to our virtual shopping cart. We're adding amazing items across the day, all day, all week. Hayley's just grabbing the envelope. So we'll give you the items at 8 o'clock every morning, and then again, Georgia will give you the next item at 11,

then 2, and then 4, the final one with Bree and Clint. If you're the first caller through this afternoon with Bree and Clint and you can name all the items at five, you win. Here we go. First item. Is this your cart, Vaughan? I don't know. Oh, is it?

No. No, it's not Vaughan's cart, but one would be not wrong in believing it was. It is a Weber barbecue. Oh, they're so great, aren't they? They're so good. Okay, so a Weber barbecue. That's item number one at Tecant today. Georgia with the next item at 11 o'clock this morning.

If you would like to play next, I bet I can guess your mum's name. Win some cash. 0800 DALES.M. Vaughan will have five questions to ask you about your mum, and then have 15 seconds to guess her name as he gets in touch with his psychic abilities. I might have a block today, the sore back that I've been experiencing for like, you know, 10 days now. I'm wondering if that's going to cause some sort of psychic block.

I certainly hope not. Blocked karma path or whatever. Hey, you on the phone, I bet I can guess your mum's name. Time for I bet I can guess your mum's name. Vaughan has five questions to ask a listener about their mum and then 15 seconds to try and guess that mum's name. Does it sound like a cat purring? Yeah, the P at the top.

It's more just the... As opposed to the... Yeah. Why are you purring like a cat? It sounds like a fart that's escaping ever so slowly. This has got Satisfyer Pro 2 buzz to it too as well. Jordan, good morning. Good morning.

Welcome to I bet I can guess your mum's name. Hey. Vaughan. Vaughan is being such a naughty boy this morning, Jordan. He's in a silly mood. His back's sore and he's grumps.

What's not recommended? Jordan, now Vaughn has five questions to ask you about your mum. Cool. What? What? What is your mum's

name? What's mum's age? How old is mum? Oh, mum's just turned 50. 50? Okay, okay. Spring chicken? That's a really good indication of, you know, the decade name.

72. Yeah. Just turned 50, like this year? Last year. So she'll be 51 this year. Okay. It could be more of a modern mum's name, it could be, couldn't't it Could be a Kate Yeah right

Holy But short for Catherine Or yeah Or just Kate But at that time You know you think About the 70s You're thinking

Post Summer of Love Yep Where people are like I don't need to call My daughter Catherine And then short it to Kate I'll just call her Kate Yeah

Or Rainbow Kate Yeah Should we chuck a Should we chuck a hippie name in? I don't reckon you need any other questions. Kate and Rainbow. You've nailed it.

You've done it. Rainbow. Yeah. There'll be a, like, it could be named after, like, a flower or a stone. Amethyst. Lily. I know, we're going too far down this road now. Yeah, I think too far.

Lily. That's a good one. That's a good one, because that's a name and a flower. That's my mum, Lil. Lil. Yeah far. Lily. That's a good one. That's a good one because that's a name and a flower. That's my mum Lil. Lil. Yeah. Lil Mummy.

That's my Lil Mama. Lil Mama. And Avril Lavigne. Don't put Avril on there. No, Lil Mama and Avril Lavigne did the boyfriend remix. Yeah.

Girlfriend, boyfriend. What was that song? Girlfriend. Girlfriend. Hey, hey, you, you, I don't like your girlfriend. Like your girlfriend. Little mama and Avril Levine. Hey, hey.

Remember? It was 2007. What are you taking for your back? Okay. Take those with food next time. Please. Now, second question. What is your mum's preferred 6pm news bulletin? TV1 or TV3?

Oh. Uh. Oh. TV3. She's a shover. She's a shover. What's a shover? News Hub.

Oh, News Hub, yeah. It looks like News Shub. Yeah, she's a shover. They call their fans the shovers. And she doesn't have any time for Simon Deload. No, no. Why not? What did Simon Deload do? she doesn't have any time for Simon Deload. No, no. Why not? What did Simon Deload do?

I don't know. What did Simon Deload do to your mum? I don't know. He probably offended her. It's probably not the time to answer that. He's probably offended her. He probably has offended her. Mike McRoberts, very inoffensive.

Yeah. Okay, so she's a team Mike McRoberts. What did Simon Deload do to your mum?. What did Simon Dallow do to your mum? Simon Dallow. Little mama and Simon Dallow. Hey, hey. Little mama and Simon Dallow. Hey, hey.

I hope mum's not listening. Wouldn't it be funny if Simon Dallow had slept with your mum, like when they were younger or whatever, and then she'd meet your dad and it's been empty. But every time that 6pm news comes on, he's just watched The Chase, your dad's like, change the channel. Because dad wouldn't want you.

And then your mum's like, I'd sleep with Mike Roberts. He's like, goddammit! Is there no news broadcast I can watch? We're moving to Prime. Okay, our next question. Oh, you got some names from that? Did that garner any names?

No, not enough. I spent too much time imagining anybody's mum's name. Next question. Oh, you got some names from that? Did that garner any names? No, not enough. I spent too much time imagining anybody's mind. You've got to say your list is looking a little short there. It's a limp list. It's a limp list. 71. What about Wendy?

Because of Wendy Petrie. Wendy Petrie. Or other newsreaders on TV3. Who are the... Samantha. I've got Samantha. That was the one name I got from her. Hillary. Hillary. Yep. Judy. Judy. Who are the Samantha I've got Samantha That was the one name I got from her Hilary Hilary Yep

Judy Judy Are we going for some I think 50s There's no Judy 50s No Judy in her 50s Yeah there'd be some Judys in their 50s

We'll put down Judy I know Judy Who'd be like late 30s So I'm just saying Judy's not a name That stopped Do you? Yeah.

Okay. Who's mum's celebrity crush? This is number three. Vin Diesel. Wow, okay. What's Vin Diesel's partner's name? Because he's been with the same woman for a very long time, hasn't he? Can you just Google that for me?

I don't like to Google during the segment. People will think I'm cheating. Okay. Paloma Jimenez. Oh, put a Paloma in there? I'm going to put a Paloma in there. Put a Paloma in there. Vin Diesel, though.

Since 2007. A bit Bogan-y. I might put in Michelle because he's worked with Michelle Rodriguez and all of those. Yes, Michelle's good. Yeah, okay. Put in Michelle. Actually, yeah, Michelle, Michelle.

Michelle. Okay. What are mum's siblings' names? Shane. Shane. Oh, Shane. Shane and Angel. Shane.

You want me to put an Angel? It kind of fits with the first question, too. Shane and Angel. Angel. Shane and Michelle. Shane and... I've got a Michelle. Have you got a Karen on there? Nah, you're right. Shane and Karen. Shane and Michelle. Shane and. I've got a Michelle. Have you got a Karen on there?

Nah, you're right. Shane and Karen. What about a Jenny? Yeah, Jenny. You've got Christine, don't you? Angela. I don't have a Christine. I can put a Christine. That's a Christine.

I'm just thinking those kind of names. Yeah, Shane and. Yeah. Shane and Paula. Yep. Shane and Paula. There she is. A classic couple.

A classic couple. A classic couple. Okay. And finally, what kind of phone does your mum have? A Samsung touchy one. A touchy one. Okay. Touchy wee Samsung. A touchy wee.

That was actually a nickname for Simon Dallow too. Why do you touchy wee Samsung? The touchy Samsung. Okay. So Samsung. Samantha. The touchy Samsung The touchy Samsung Okay so Samsung Samantha That's a stretch That's a stretch Sung

That's a weird question That's just a Korean name What were you trying to get out of this question? What was the angle here? On what kind of phones they've got? Is she an iPhone mum or is she a Samsung mum? Well, no, I just thought like an iPhone mum might be a bit jazzed up, a bit funkier.

Like I just know that the Samsungs, like my dad uses a Samsung. Mum's actually on a Samsung now because the Huawei wouldn't scan the QR codes, the COVID dresser apps. Are you sure? She couldn't find an app codes, the COVID dresser apps. Are you sure? She couldn't find an app for it. Oh, I think she's on the Samsung now and she's got the app for it. What about Joe? Joe loves the Samsung.

I've got Samantha on this list twice. Yeah. What about a Joe? A Joe. A Joanne. Yep. What about a Raylene? I don't have a Linda.

You want me to put a Raylene? Raylene. Raylene. What are you thinking? Love Songs Till Midnight? Yeah, I was. Okay. I've got Love Songs Till Midnight. Who else has done Love Songs Till Midnight?

No idea. Okay, right. You've got enough names? Do you want to chuck a Donna on there just to be safe? I won't be without a Donna. I'll tell you that much later. Okay. All right.

Well, Vaughan, you now have 15 seconds to guess Jordan's mum's name. there just to be just to be safe i won't be without a daughter okay all right well vaughn uh you now have 15 seconds to guess jordan's mum's name now jordan if you hear your mum's name on the list yell out stop that's my mum's name vaughn okay your time starts now kate rambo lily samantha wendy hillary judy paloma michelle angel karen jenny christine paula joanne linda raylene Wendy, Hilary, Judy, Paloma, Michelle, Angel, Karen, Jenny, Christine, Paula, Joanne, Linda, Raylene, Kerry, Donna, Susan. Stop! It's my mum's name! What?

Which one? Kerry! Kerry! How did you get Kerry? Because Raylene Ramsey did Love Songs Till Midnight, and who else did Love Songs Till Midnight? The lovely, but late, Kerry Smith! Oh my gosh, that was a last minute. That was a last minute addition.

That was like the last. And the last question. I didn't think you were going to get that. Jordan, she got it. I have just been told. My heart's racing. It's $100 there locked in. Yay.

I think last time I gave away too much money. I got in trouble. You got in trouble. You just. Oh. That has fired off the bonus round. The bonus round!

While you're on the phone, I'll have a go at guessing your dad's name. Now, one guess at the dad's name. No questions. We don't know your last name, do we, Jordan? No. Don't tell me. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Because I feel I want to run down Kerry Smith. Don't tell me. Yeah. Okay. Okay.

Because I feel I want to run down Kerry Smith. I want to run down a Smith path. Okay. You've got your end, Smith. I do have a funny story about one of the names that you picked, though. That doesn't give away my dad's name. Okay. Good us. So Rainbow is my son's last name.

Your son's last name is Rainbow? Yeah. What? That's crazy. I didn't know that was a last name, but then that does make sense because whoever made Rainbow's end must be called Rainbow. Yeah. No.

Yeah. Yeah. It's not the Mr. and Mrs. Rainbow. No, no, no. Made Rainbow's end? No. Their last name was End. Their first name was... Oh, the End no. Made rainbow ends? No, their last name was End. Oh, the ends, like Lorraine and End.

It was Lorraine and Bobo End. Jordan, I can't believe that you and Kerry have a connection to a rainbow that was on Vaughn's list. I tell you, there's something more to this. There's something more to this. Yeah, he's psychic. Okay, so dad's name. What is it? So let's riff some.

Kerry and Kerry and Ryan. No, that's too young, I reckon. John, I mean, you go for your classic John, Paul. Ringo. Yeah. George. George and Kerry. George and Kerry could go well.

Smith? Yeah. I want this so badly for you. Ivan? Ivan Smith. Where did you get Ivan from? I don't know. It's a very Nordic feel to me.

Ivan and Kerry. Does Jordan feel Nordic to you? No. Jordan doesn't ring Nordic bells to me. Okay, well, Vaughan, you have one guess. For another bonus $100. What are you locking in? I can't think straight.

I've got to... Take a stab. I've got to suck at kink. John Smith? John? What are you with the Smith? I don't know. See, I know there's no Smith.

I know there's no Smith. You're going to focus on Kerry. But I just got Kerry. I got Kerry because I got Kerry off the Smith. So I was thinking like Smith. Kerry and... Kerry and... Kerry and... No, it wouldn't be Kerry and Craig.

Kerry and Steve. Steve. Lock one in. Kerry and Steve. Kerry and Steve. Kerry and Steve. Are you locking that in? Yeah, I'm locking Steve.

Jordan, what is your dad's last name? No, first name. First name, sorry. William or Bill. Oh! Will Smith. No. What I'm saying is Will Smith, if I'd follow down the Smith.

Will Smith, the Fresh Prince. You haven't done it. Oh, no. But, Jordan, you still win $100. Bourne did guess your mum's name. Congratulations. Thank you. There we go.

And so your psychic. Will and Kerry. Bill and Kerry. Kerry and Bill. Yeah. Let it go now. It's gone. Will and Kerry. Bill and Kerry. Kerry and Bill. Yeah. Let it go now. It's gone. You've lost.

You've lost. Well, I won. Your psychic ability is not hampered by your bad back. I guess not. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Potlucks. Potlucks.

The dinner where everyone brings a dish and you all chow down and share these. Always confusing the rules of a potluck. You can't bring a bakery bread, a New World bakery bread. Why can't you? It's not enough work. You haven't put in enough effort. I'll do that with a pav. I'm like that lady on the ad.

I'll just buy a pav. And then give it a crack. Give it a crack. Put on some toppings. And I'm like, oh, God, I made this all day. No, that's good, but you put in the effort. Whereas if you just go and get a $3 tiger loaf from New World and slap it on the table in bag, it's no good.

It's a lot of pressure, the potluck. I feel like I appreciate a potluck where it's organised and someone's saying who's on what. Otherwise, I'm always worried that everyone turns up with the same thing. Four salads, no meat. Yeah, exactly. Well, Anna, you went to a potluck. I hosted a potluck. Oh, you hosted a potluck.

Oh, wow, where was our invite? You had a thing. I'm sorry, what? I'm sorry. Do you not want my Mexican bean dip? What are you bringing to eat with the dip? Nothing. That's someone else's job. I brought the dip. Wait, it's just beans? It's refried

beans, isn't it? No, it's like black beans, corn, tomato, cashew, red onion. Is it cheese? It's a fresh dip. Oh, no. Anyway, so... Have you heard of guacamole, the ultimate Mexican dip that doesn't require? Have you heard about just melting a whole thing of cheese? Oh, I have heard about it.

Just bake and a breathe. Yeah, exactly. So, Anna, you hosted a potluck. Yeah. How did it go? It was good. It was very successful. My friends all knocked it out of the park.

I was expecting a rogue garlic bread or maybe a chip and dip. If I'd turned up, I would have brought a lot of garlic bread. Fletch loves a garlic bread to a potluck. Yeah, no, everyone made dishes from scratch. It was really impressive. There was nearly a fight over a Greek salad because somebody had changed at the last minute and said, actually, guys, I'm going to bring Greek salad.

But one person hadn't piped up in the group chat and was like, shit, I've already got a Greek salad on the go. I'm already elbows deep in cucumber. Yeah. Got some church matter. As we speak. There was an issue, though, after the potluck had finished. Yeah, so there was 10 of us and it was a lot of food.

Like there was still, I reckon, maybe 50% left over from each dish. Wow. And I would like to raise the Like, there was still, I reckon, maybe 50% left over from each dish. Wow. And I would like to raise the question, Your Honour, as the hoster of the potluck dinner, am I entitled to the leftovers, or at least a portion, or does the bringer of the dish take that home? So you're saying 50% of 10 dishes, you want 5 full meals left over at your house. Yeah, if you host a potluck, you're not preparing or buying food

for the next at least 4 or 5 days. That's what I'd planned. But also, you can't hold it against an individual if they go to grab their casserole dish at the end of the night and the casserole's still sat in the same dish and they're just like, I just need to get out of here. Exactly. Did you provide Tupperware for them to place their leftovers in?

I didn't and maybe this is my error. Should I have had five open Tupperware containers? Yes, you need Tupperware and then when you're clearing the table, you just on the sly put in half of what, so they take home, you don't have to do the dishes, they take home their stuff and you get the leftovers. Taking your cut. Okay, that's a hot play.

Do you think I do that quietly? I don't announce. I'm actually just going to take a little bit of this. Or just at the start of, before the meal even starts, is you transfer everybody's dishes into your own bowls. Yes. And then you have all of their stuff washed and ready to go for the end of the night.

Yeah, that's hot. And so they would then have to physically go and get their food back out of your dish. Which is so naughty. Don't you think at some point one of your attendees is going to go, wasn't there a whole lot of food left? And I'll say, nope, there wasn't. But you've cleaned it up and it's in the fridge.

They can't see it. What about when we went to yours, Vaughan? You packed us each a meat bag with a bit of everything. Yeah. Meat sack takeaways. So everyone got a couple of saucies and some salad and some garlic bread

that was left over. There's a lot of garlic bread. Vegetable. Somebody really splashed out on some $2 garlic bread. Yeah. You could have like divvied it all out.

It wasn't $2. It was bloody delicious is what it was. I think it was $2.50. Next time. I reckon that's the best way is to say like hey everyone grab a Tupperware

so it's your fault actually that you don't have any Tupperware Okay I've got Tupperware I just didn't get it out Well what's it what uses it in the drawer Okay fair

No but also you don't want your Tupperware leaving your house because Tupperware's not boomerang very rarely does it come back Well that's where you get your own label maker Well that's what

we used to have, the Tupperware at home, and it had a plaster on the bottom with our Smith written on it on the Band-Aid. Yeah. Oh, yuck, a Band-Aid. Yeah. They've got to wash it.

They've got a Band-Aid floating around their sink. Those Band-Aids really did stick to Tupperware in the 80s and 90s, though. Yeah. They held on tight. So, I mean, I guess there's some lessons learnt here. Yeah, so I think next time I'll say BYO Tupperware with Dish, I will be taking 70% of each remaining leftover.

You can have 30. Yeah. I think that's fair. Good. That's a host fee. Yep. Resolved. Totally fair enough.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about New York City's rubber rooms. Rubber rooms? Ever heard of a rubber room? Never heard of a rubber room. Well, there was a 2009 article in the New Yorker about rubber rooms that really brought a lot of attention to the rubber room.

The rubber room is where teachers who were employed by the state of New York would go when they couldn't teach, but they also couldn't be fired. So they'd done something. Right. Not a fireable offence. Right. Due to old teaching union contracts in New York. Like some kids like blah blah and you throw

your pump bottle at them. Yeah. That's misconduct. Hitting, that's a, or incompetence. Oh yeah. And so they'd be sent off to the rubber room where they would sit in there for the length of the school day not doing anything.

But they had to be there because they were employed by New York State to be a teacher. Like a detention. Like detention. And what did they do in the rubber room? Well, it was completely up to them. They could do whatever they wanted but they had to be there. They could only leave for 30 to 45 minutes at lunchtime.

Right. Other than that, had to sit in these. Up to 1,500 people at any given stage. Now, in 2009, after that article came out in the New Yorker, the New York state said, this is something we're phasing out. However, in 2019, it was still happening, and they just changed the names of them in the locations and made them harder to get to in old warehouses and stuff.

So one ex-teacher, who was still technically a teacher, managed his real estate and rental properties from there, so effectively ran it as an office that he didn't have to pay power or anything for. Another teacher in a Bronx rubber room studied for LSAT and is now a practicing attorney.

Oh wow. Because they were forced to do something with their time there, so lots of people would just go, like, lots of them would just go to sleep as they were just getting paid to do so. But some of them... That's wild. Yeah, had it. So when their contracts ran out and they were no longer teachers and the union wasn't fending for them,

that they had something to do on the other side of it. Someone's made a documentary about it in 2010, The Rubber Room. Which is apparently based on the New Yorker article, which is going to lead to them getting shut down in the documentary even more so, but then in 2019 another investigation by the New York Post found out they still exist. So called

Rubber Rooms named after padded cells of psychiatric hospitals. Because they reckon you'd go crazy sitting in there doing nothing all day. Was there hope that the teachers would quit and end their contracts? I think so. Yeah, they pushed to the point of boredom where they're like, well, I'll just

opt out. And it was costing them a ton. An absolute fortune per year to keep these people employed. So today's by the way, I did a quick Google I can't find that New Zealand's ever had these. No, I wouldn't imagine so. Today's fact of the day is in New York,

there are rubber rooms for teachers who can't teach but also can't be fired. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. A woman in Sydney Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- Huntsman. Now, they're the ones that look evil and big, but they're not. They can be like the size of your head. But they're not poisonous. Not poisonous. Funnel webs are the bad ones.

Are the bad ones? Yeah. These are the, they can grow so, so big. So in the photo she shared of this huntsman spider, it was pretty large. I'd say size of my hand. Yeah. And if it wasn't, even if it's not poisonous, I'm out of there. Same.

So what she did was she sprayed it with bug spray. You know, didn't try to sort of scoop it out or get it out of there. She just wanted to kill it. Like coated it. The bug spray she sprayed so much, it would have had that white foamy cover to it. Yes.

Yeah. Awful. Anyway, so after she sprayed it with bug spray, she believed that it then lunged towards her. Well, you would do the same if you coated in a foam. Absolutely. Someone's trying to kill you with foam. Off the wall towards her and she freaked out,

jumped off the bed, landed on top of her stiletto, which went through her foot. Went fully through her foot. That x-ray is horrific. It's gone in on the outer side of the big toe and come in just between the big toe and the second toe. It's in there. It is bad.

And then she asked her flatmate to sort of pull it out and the flatmate rightfully declined. So she went to hospital. They had it removed. She's in a full boot. It's all wrapped up. The stiletto went right through her foot. Very stupid.

It's all because of the spider. Yep. I can't believe it was a stiletto that went through there and we wanted to know from you, what is your dumbest injury? How did you get injured? What happened? I know,

she just jumped off her bed. Jumped off her bed, stood on the end of a stiletto. That's got to be a pointy stiletto to go through the foot. Hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey. A very thin end. Yeah. It's always so, when you hurt yourself doing like the most mundane,

stupidest thing. Yeah. I remember I, um, um, put out my calf muscle and I was just running across the road. And I was like, because I was like, the light's about to go green.

I'm about to get run over. And then I was just like, oh my, and like all I did was just go and take off. That's just you being old. I like taking off. It was jandals.

I don't know if that's you. Oh, jandals. Running in jandals. I was in slides, yeah. Yes, we want to know from you, what is your dumbest injury? All right, how did it happen? The stupidest injuries you've got. Yeah, a woman was running away from a lunging spider,

and she jumped off her bed and put a stiletto through her foot. The dumbest injuries. Sherea, good morning. Hi, how are you? Good. What was your dumb injury? Half of my ex-partner mowed the lawns. I was doing the weeding.

He was doing the gardening. Next minute, he couldn't get the lawnmower started all the time. It kept cutting out due to him not being able to mow over the weeds properly. So we had no weed bag at the time. So I had to shake the wee clumps and nick minute my middle finger got chopped off well yeah no you don't do that oh no what yes the silly girl little finger as well yeah the whole tip so what is it down to the first knock yeah so how uh if you're giving someone the middle finger, it's just not as... Stubby. Well, it's F anyway, so it's the F-U finger and it's F,

but I can get a disability card with my middle finger. Yeah! You can see I've been parking. Shreya, you are a silver linings woman. Okay, how does not having the middle finger... Entitle you to a disabled car. Because she has to scurry into the mall in shame. If I can't hold the steering wheel properly.

Oh, of course. Because with the middle finger, you need it to grip things. I even dropped the plates in the dishes and had to buy new plates. I just think it was more the fact that when they said, how'd you do that? You said, I stuck my finger in a lawnmower. And they're like, she needs the parking. If she can do that, she could really hurt herself walking from a park. The dumb thing is,

is that it was my ex-partner, so I always have a memory when I look at it now. Yeah, that sucks, doesn't it? Yeah. Sherea, thank you for sharing. Oh, 800 dials. Let him miss a number. Your dumb injuries.

A woman in Sydney jumped off her bed straight onto her stiletto heel. Went through. Impaled the foot. Yeah, because of a spider. We want to know your dumbest injuries. Just the little things, the little movements that you made. Yeah, some messages in.

I broke my hand reaching for eggs. How do you do that? Smacked it on a metal bench, apparently. Oh. Don't know how that happened. I was having snuggles with my wife When I slipped off the edge of the bed That I was kneeling on

Kneeling on? Oh yeah Kneeling on the edge of the bed Slipped off and tore my ACL Would you lie on your ACC form about that? Yes, absolutely It was at the gym Yeah, because otherwise you'd be that statistic

Because you know there was really statistics. Oh, yeah. You don't want to be that person. Somebody said I was having a very hungover shower and I decided to lay down. Okay. When it was time to get up, I put my hand on the ground and pushed up

right on top of a razor, a shaving razor. Cut myself quite considerably. Lisa, what was your dumbest injury? Well, I was 12 And I was like Howling my parents veggie patch Whatever, with a garden fork And I was so exhausted

I put it down so hard To put it in the garden to finish But I put it through my foot Oh my god And I went I didn't even feel it. I went to walk away and my foot was stuck. You were stuck to the ground.

I was stuck to the garden and then I pulled it out and went and told my mum and she's like, that'll heal. That'll heal. Gave it a kiss and a rub and then just left. And did it heal or did you need to go to A&E? No, I didn't go to A&E. We lived in Macau so it was like, you know, no one out there.

I don't know if that's an excuse for not taking your child to a hospital if they've empowered themselves. Mum's like, we've got dinner, and then we've got my favourite shows on it. Yeah, shorties. Yeah, wash the dirt out and she's fine. Lisa, thanks for your call. Cam, what was your dumbest injury? I got a remote control plane, a big metre meat-a-long one, either way.

Oh, fancy. Yeah, it had a metal propeller on it. And I decided that it was a good idea to sit in front of it while it was on, idling, to adjust a couple of things on it, bump the throttle and slice my foot open. Cam. Oh! No, Cam. Oh, dude!

Wow! How deep did it cut you? To put it this way, I had to turn around to my kids and say, go inside and get mum and I hobbled myself in. All she did was take one look at me and said, that's a hospital trip. Yeah, whenever your dad said, go get mum, and it wasn't because

he was too busy to give you a hiding, it really meant business. Dads don't say that lightly, do they? They really don't, no. Cam, thanks for your call. Janaya, what was the dumb way you injured yourself? Taking a pair of jeans off. Oh, it's

hard. What did you break or injure? I broke my hand, two bones in my hand, and also crushed my hand. How? How tight were these skinny jeans? Well, they were the cuffed ones. They had like a cuff around the bottom at the ankle, and I was taking them off, lost my balance, lost my footing, fell, and then when I fell, I knocked over an oil-fin heater,

the biggest one you could possibly find in the house. That fell down, but as it was falling, I put my hands down because I was still falling, and the heater landed on top of my hand. I landed on top of the heater. The fin sliced my hand open and broke two bones and crushed it. Jeepers, Jane. All because of jeans.

The only thing I've ever injured taking off a pair of skinny jeans is my big ego. Jermaine, thanks for your call. Some messages to finish up. I was giving my friend a hug and I broke my pinky finger. I'm guessing you went in

and the finger lingered and then it just cracked in the round. I hate when you smash your pinky finger. Yeah, same. I was off work and then I went back to work and I was in a pinky cast for nine weeks or less. A pinky cast.

That's shame. You'd just be like, can you just do the whole wrist? Yeah. Go midway down the forearm. I slipped on grass in my first week of year nine during PE and broke my tibia and ended up in a full plaster cast on my hip. Had to go back to school in a wheelchair for a week before swapping to crutches,

but I just slipped on grass. Oh, you'd be, what would your nickname be? Tib Tibs. Oh, Wheels McGee. Old Slip Slip. Old Slip Tibs. Broken butt. Yeah, yeah. Quite a few people

since the pitchfork through the foot story have messaged in about a rake through the foot. Yeah. Um, I was walking through a door and I sneezed and headbutted the door. I got both concussion and my neck put out. Jeez. That's an intense sneeze. You got a big sneeze.

You got a big sneeze on you. Powerful sneeze. All right. ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.