ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 10th February 2023

Episode Date: February 9, 2023

Flip Phones  Top 6: Toy Story 5  Silly Little Poll!  Maisie Peters!  Why are you Grumpy?  Final Rankings!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Drive through and get a cup of barista-made McCafe coffee on the go. We can kiss my big fat dumper goodbye. Both of you. Figuratively?

Kiss my ass, is that what you're saying? Get prepared to see it shrink. Uh-oh. I've been ditched. What's that? I've been broken up with. I've been dumped. You've been dumped. I've been ditched. I've been broken up with. I've been dumped. You've been dumped? Or you did the dumping?

I've been dumped by my PT. Why did they dump you? They're following another career path. What are they going to do? Flight attendant. Yeah, I know. It's a dream of hers. You've seen the world.

Did they do flight attending before COVID? No. They've never done it Before in their life Never No they're doing The training now I just can't I can't imagine doing it

Why I could Being a flight attendant Why Yeah Have you met humans Yeah I mean That would be the worst part

But she's a PT So she just deals With humans all day So she loves humans She loves people And she's so personal She's such like a nice I'm going to miss her so much. We've been together

for five years. Oh I'm sorry to hear about this breakup. That's a big breakup. It's going to take some time to move on. It is going to take some time. Are you going to get another PT? Or are you just going to use the apps and stuff? I feel like I'm cheating. Yeah. I might have to use the Chris Hemsworth app. Is there someone at your gym that you could walk

past at some stage, like someone that works there, and you could just say, oh, if you could just keep an eye on me in case I'm really dogging this technique. No, but you've been doing it so long, you know what to do. I know, I know. And you're not unmotivated. But she pushes me. I know, but I can't get. That's why I say say goodbye to the dumper.

She built this dumper. I didn't do the work. She built this dumper. Boom, boom. She built this dumper. I didn't do the work. She built this dumper. Boom. Boom. She built this dumper on rocks. What does she build it on? Pits, rocks, and thrusts. Squats, squats, and thrusts.

Pompadom. Pompadom. Pompadom. It's a beautiful day and across the bay, that big fat ass is a big slice of cake and I want to slap it every time I see it. Now I have to like piddle around the gym. I think I'm probably the same as you, Warren.

I couldn't do the PT thing because of the money. Like the money and I just, I'd be like, you don't tell me what to do. Two more. Fuck you. And I just end up having yarns with them, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we yarn, but we've become friends over the last five years as you do.

Right. But we get it done. Yeah. But you're maybe we yarn, but we've become friends over the last five years, as you do. Right. But we get it done. Yeah, but you're not unmotivated. You can go to the gym and do stuff by yourself. I don't like it. I get bored. We'll do some classes. I'm not fucking going to the classes of you anymore if you clip cloths.

You know how I feel on that. Get an iPad and watch telly while you do cardio. It's the absolute key to cardio. You forget you're doing it. But I don't like cardio. Neither. No one likes cardio. I like to lift to cardio. You forget you're doing it. But I don't like cardio. Neither. No one likes cardio. I like to lift things up.

You like to lift things up. Watch me lift this desk. I'm not a huge lift person. I think you'll find that it's bolted to the floor, but okay. I was going to say, she's heavy. Haven't found much I can't lift these days. That's heavy.

That's bolted, is it? Yeah. It's good to know. Something's happened at my butthole trying to lift that up. Wait a minute, what? Have you pooped or a pop? Or have you hemorrhoided?

I think I've popped. You've popped a little hemi. I think I've popped or pooped. Can you just check? I'm not going to be able to leave the audience. Jesus Christ. Oh, she's sticking her fingers in. I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

I would rub my cheeks together if I was unsure if I'd shit myself. Is it a hemorrhoid? No, I'm kidding. There was nothing wrong with my butt hole. The hole. Thank God. The hole's fine. You know I've been having issues.

You've got an itch or something. You've got an itchy. Yeah, my chafe was kissing again and I couldn't tell if it was. The marching tights because you wear 12 layers of marching tights. You've got to talc up or get a vas down there or something. Yeah, get a vas. My whole fitness regime is out the window. I'm leaning in.

I'm leaning out. I've just got this wedding to do this weekend, and then I'm keen for a lean out. Model dimensions. I reckon for a couple of weeks, I'm ready for a hard lean out. Let's lean out, man. And then after my birthday, I lean back in. Right.

After Smith birthday seizure. Season. I hope not. I'm not leaning out that hard. Season. I'm going to lean back in. All right. Season. I hope not. Am I having one now? Not one I'm leaning out that hard. Season. I'm going to lean back in. All right. Yeah.

Play ZM's Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. Thank you, Sam. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. Hi. Friday, Friday, Friday. Happy Friday. Burt Bacharach's dead.

Oh, mate. 90% of the people listening will have no idea who Burt Bacharach is. I always remember, I found out who he was because my granddad used to, like, my granddad had a few good jokes. You'd tell him about something, not jokes, but just quick quips. Yeah. Like, I remember once I was telling him about the Nintendo when I was a kid. Someone got a Nintendo, and he's like, I used to have one of those,

but the wheel fell off. And that's what he said a bit when you're talking about technology he didn't know and if you were listening to music he'd always say is this Burt Bacharach's latest when it was like Green Day right

is this Burt Bacharach is this where you get your humour from this is where I get my quick quips and humour your humour quick quips and humour wasn't he in the Austin Powers movie

he was he was in one of the Austin Powers movies when they're having a river on top so he wrote lots of music for other people. Yes. One of the most important composers of the 20th century. Which one was the last one? He wrote I Say a Little Prayer.

I'll be a little prayer for you. Forever and ever. Anyway, it was 93. Welcome by. Yeah. I mean, it's what, 93, 94? Good innings. Great innings for the double B. Yeah. See mean, it's what, 93, 94? Good innings. Great innings for the double B.

Yeah. See you, BB. All right, coming up on the show, the top six. Yeah, Toy Story 5 has been announced. Now, I thought Toy Story 4 was a push. I enjoyed it, but it was unnecessary. Toy Story 3 was the perfect finish to the trilogy with a whole lot of little side projects and the little mini movies. I felt we were perfect. That was our perfect Toy Story 3 was the perfect finish to the trilogy with a whole lot of little side projects

and the little mini movies. I felt we were perfect. That was our perfect Toy Story. Toy Story 4 came out. Now they've announced Toy Story 5. Sometimes you're going to know when to fold them. Correct, which I thought they did with Toy Story, but Woody's out of the game.

Yeah. If you saw Toy Story 4, Woody's out of the game. Is Buzz there? Buzz went with the little girl who owns all the toys now. Right. But what is out of the game? Him and Bo Peep. Okay, spoiler alert.

Yeah, wow. I haven't seen any of these. Where's Andy? Andy's dead. What? He's an alcoholic. COVID. He got COVID.

Oh, he might have got COVID. God. No, Andy gave the toys away at the end of Toy Story 3. Jesus, where are you at? Toy Story 3, one of the most emotionally tormenting movies I've ever seen. That's the last one I saw. So Toy Story 4, Buzz is gone. I know, Woody's gone.

So I've got the top six toys that should be in Toy Story 5. Oh, okay. We need a new lead. We do. Yeah. All right, it's coming up in the top six. Next. All right. It's coming up in the top six. Next on the show.

You are not happy about this. I can't believe it. This means I'm old. When things that I had are now back in fashion. Yeah. Retro fashion. Kind of ironically as a retro move. And this one here, I never thought I'd see the light of day again.

I'm getting sick of this. I'm getting sick of the low-rise jeans and the tube tops and the whatever you call them. We used to call them S-strands, you know, the little strandy bits and the butterfly clips in the hair. All this stuff that was unironic when I was growing up is back in fashion. And now this is the final straw.

I'm done with you, Gen Zers. You're really firing shots at Gen Zers. Well, their new trend is to try to get their hands on a vintage cell phone. All right, just that sentence hands on a vintage cell phone. Alright, just that sentence alone. A vintage cell phone. Vintage flip phones are the new craze. So think your Razors,

your Motorola's. That was a good phone. Did I have a flip phone that Tom Cruise had? No, you had a slide phone that Tom Cruise had. I was pretty pretty cool. So it's all over social media, absolutely flooded with videos of people showing off their new flip phones. Didn't Motorola relaunch the Razr as a smartphone?

Or as a, am I wrong? Oh, did they? I don't know. I feel like a year or two ago they tried maybe. Yeah. So it's like an anti, so it's ironic they're putting it on TikTok because it's like an anti-social media craze.

Right. So they're going like, do you spend too much time scrolling on this? Dating apps, da-da-da-da, get a flip phone. It's got none of that. But it's like, but where are we watching this video, babe? You can download polyphonic ringtone via WAP. Hell yeah.

Remember WAP? Yeah. And you would get your favourite song, but it would be like. Yeah. Yeah. It was good stuff. I mean, I guess the idea is that you're taking away all of the apps and everything that drain your time. Like you can't be on TikTok.

What are you supposed to text? This is the expensive option. Yeah, but they're not paying 20 cents a text, are they? And they've only got 100 of them. Do you remember when you had a $20 top-up card?

Yeah. 100 texts. Yeah. But now you get unlimited texts. Unlimited now, right? So here's a Motorola Razr and I think the whole... Is it a foldable screen?

Oh, yeah. The whole thing is... Samsung's is it a foldable screen? Oh, yeah. The whole thing is. Samsung's got the old foldable screen. Yeah, so it's like $800, but technically it's just like a smartphone. It's a smartphone. So you might as well just buy it. No, if you get the original one, that's the other thing that people are posting is the pictures that flip phones took, which were just the grainiest, smallest, stupid things.

That's an aesthetic now. Yeah. Whereas we just had to put up with it and go like, who's that in the photo? This is the best we have. I can't even tell. Oh, I just can't. Where is it going to end?

Was this the cell phone you had from, was it Tom Cruise, Mission Impossible? That doesn't look like it. Was that maybe, I think so. That was a Nokia. Yeah, that might have been a Nokia. Because he always, in Mission Impossible, had the latest phone that whatever company was prepping.

It was a bit of product placement, wasn't it? Yeah, a bit of product placement. Well, if you were smart enough, because I had the hot pink Razor. Yep. I had the black Batman Begins version. Wow. But if you were smart enough to hold on to it. You just chucked them out, right?

You chucked them out. Yeah, we used to bit them. You should recycle them. They've got gold in them. You should recycle them. I don't think we knew about that, though, back then, did we? No, because the planet was fine in the 2000s. The planet was fine.

It was absolutely fine. Back when weather events were, you know, weather events, not just weekly occurrences. Yes, yeah. And so if we'd just popped those old Razor phones in a drawer, we'd probably be making some money right now. Yeah, I know, but, like, you'd go through, because they were so flimsy, You'd break them all the time.

They used to literally snap in half. Yeah, if you sat on them wrong and they're in your pocket, they'd snap at the hinge. So you couldn't keep them. They were just flimsy whimsy. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Well, Valentine's Day is Tuesday? Tuesday. Tuesday. Have you chosen a Valentine's? I choo-choo choose you. I choo-choo Tuesday. Perfect year for the Ralph Wiggum Simpsons card. Yeah. Tuesday. Have you chosen a Valentine's? Oh, I choo-choo-choose you. I choo-choo-choose you. Perfect. Perfect year for the Ralph Wiggum Simpsons card.

Yeah. Yes. Have you chosen a Valentine's, Vaughn? Like who I want to be my Valentine's? Yeah. No, I'm keeping my options open at this stage. Fletch? No.

No Valentine's? No. I'm looking good. You're looking... Okay, Sade's had So many consecutive Valentines So I was just thinking This year I might just Leave it open to the ladies

Ladies Gents Ladies gents Ladies gents I'm 41 I'm 41 in 10 days time It's about time I started dabbling

Yeah Ladies Dabble man Are you in a dabble Why not Right okay Valentine's Day Find him a boyfriend

It's my midlife crisis Did I show you my MX5 And my hair extensions No you didn't No You're gonna turn out With some sort of Rough looking plugs

Oh Vornay Can you imagine How rough these plugs It would be a lot Yeah And it'd look like Little patches of You know when people

Re-grass Yes Like my lawn You get a roll out lawn and parts of it start dying. Yeah. Bloody patchy. It'll look like that. It'll look horrible.

Well, Valentine's Day on Tuesday, and some research has been done into people that use dating apps and how they find them. 42% of daters think that apps like Tinder and Bumble make it easier to find a long-term partner. Yeah. Because I genuinely don't know how you meet people now. Well, yeah, and even if you go back like 10 or so years,

like it was kind of like, how'd you meet? Oh, let's lie. Let's definitely not say it was Tinder. Oh, yeah, online dating was like poo-pooed. And now think about how many weddings there would be where they met on Tinder or an app. I know. It'd be like...

I think the... Well, I don't think this is any great secret, but I think the wedding I'm going to this weekend was a week... Tinder. No. Yes. Yes. Tinder's...

Okay. They had been at the same parties, but Tinder was like how they met. How they met. So chatting one-on-one. Yeah. Right. I just think it's just the new way to do it. So 40% of adults think that dating apps make it easy to find a long-term partner.

Only 22% said apps made it harder. Under 30-year-olds feel a little bit differently. 35% think apps make it easier to find a serious partner. While 33% said it's harder. 43% of men say they use dating apps to date casually. May not be a surprise to women, that one. If you flip that round, 48% of women said they're using dating apps

to find long-term partners. Only 37% using dating apps casually. Do people still go to the clubs and make eyes? That's how we used to do it. Make eyes? You go to the club. The club, yeah. And you hit the dance floor.

Yeah. And then you maybe meet eyes of someone. Yeah, and maybe do a little bump and grind. Yeah, yeah, right. To get just a taste of maybe what's to come. Oh, my goodness me. And then follow through. Yeah, yeah. Oh, absolutely. I'm sure And then follow through. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, absolutely. I'm sure that does. Yeah, I'm sure. I mean, but you can imagine it's just easier at home on the couch. Yeah. Yeah. 88% of adults are disappointed by what they've seen on dating apps. Dude, I, anytime I jump on, because I also think like the dating apps are changing, right?

There's all these different versions. Yeah, yeah. The last time I jumped on Tinder for a friend, I was like, holy moly. It's rough. It's rough. Wang. It's rough. No, no, not Wang.

Just like, what is that photo? What are you up to? Yeah. So 90% of women, 87% of men say they're disappointed by what they've seen on the apps. Yeah. More than 55% of men say they're disappointed by what they've seen on the apps. More than 55% of adults feel insecure by the lack of messages that they receive. Yeah, 54% of women feel overwhelmed by messages on dating apps. Only 25% of men feel the same way.

So women definitely getting deluged and undated with messages. Whereas guys probably a bit more on the quiet side. God. Yeah. Another stat, 35% of app users have paid to use a dating app. Only fans. Is that a dating app? No, no, no.

So, like, they'll only give you a certain amount of likes per day. Like a premium. Like a premium. Oh, God. It's like Candy Crush, eh? You got so many energy bolts a day or whatever it was, and then you had to pay for more. Yeah, you don't want to wait till the next day to get your candies.

That's only like $2.69 as well. Yeah. I'll just do that. Just pay it. It's not that much. You can't put a price on true love. No. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley from the bustling ZM Think Tank.

This is the top six. Hello. Frozen 3. Tick. I'm down. I'm down. Sweet. Love me a Frozen.

Zootropolis 2. The first one ruled. I haven't seen it. I'm ready for another one. But I'll trust you. I think you'll like it. All right. It's got Jason Bateman.

Jason Bateman's in it. Oh, yeah, but it's a little Bateman boy. I am, but you've got to stop watching kids' movies. No, these aren't kids' movies. Grow up. These are beautiful. And these were announced yesterday by Disney that are on the board to be done. And Toy Story 5.

Toy Story 5, says the Independent. Why didn't they stop at Toy Story 3? The AV Club said Toy Story 5, undermining another perfect ending. So there's a lot of questions. Tim Allen's coming back to play Buzz, but of course Tom Hanks, Woody, he's kind of done. He's gone, yeah. He was done. Maybe have a guest role, maybe have a little bit of a flashback sequence, but I don't know.

Both Tim Allen and Tom Hanks have aged so much. You know, like, we can't just sort of, they don't have the same voice anymore. They're older gentlemen. But do you know who's making the movie? Who? Disney. And do you know who has the best de-aging technology?

Both visually and audibly. Can they do it audibly? Yeah. They can de-age your voice. Can they? Yeah. Oh, my God, they've just done it to me. And I grew up in Britain reason you're brash.

And I grew up in pretty. You're brash. But they're going to need new toys. So I've got the top six toys

that need to be in Toy Story 5. Okay. Given that Woody's not there. Yeah. Number six on the list, the homegrown

classic, the Buzzy Bee. Oh yeah. Get your tie around it. It'd be lovely. Clackety, clackety, clackety, clackety.

Could it be Jason Gunn? Being Bumble. Being Bumble the Buzzy Bee. It'd be lovely. Clackety, clackety, clackety, clackety, clackety. Could it be Jason Gunn? Being Bumble. Zzzz. Being Bumble. It's Bumble. It could be. Jason Gunn would bloody love that.

Love that. Love that. Bloody love that. What are they? $32, though. That's not bad. I thought there'd be more. For a wooden toy, it's pretty good.

And the wing always broke. Yeah, it always came off. Because the wing was the plastic thing, and when you dragged it, it spun round, but it always, like, cracked, and you had a half wing. Yeah. And then the antenna was a spring just glued into the wood. That would come out. Yeah.

And then you'd choke on it. And the kid would chew on the arse end of it. Yeah. And so the paint would all come off. Hopefully not lead paint. Was that toxic paint? I feel back in the day it probably was. Oh, back in the day it would have been.

That's why we're made of harder stuff. Yeah. Unstoppable. Number five on the list of the top six toys that need to be in Toy Story 5 to replace Woody are Dad's Harley Davidson. You know, Mum's always saying he's a bloody child out there with that toy. Yeah. He never rides it.

He just revs it up in the garage because he's scared to take it on the open road. And fair enough. They're terrifying. And number four on the list of the top six toys that need to be in Toy Story 5 to replace Woody are Chatter Rings. Oh, yeah. That would be one annoying movie. Unless you were doing it, and then it would be fine.

That was a rule with Chatter Rings. You're doing it. It's great. But the minute you weren't, it's like whistling. When somebody else is doing it, it's very annoying. Number three on the list of the top six toys that need to be in Toy Story 5 are Tamagotchi. Yeah. Pooping everywhere.

Yeah. Dying everywhere? Yeah. Dying every day? They forget about it for five minutes and it dies of starvation or something? Or gets really angry or misbehaves? Just reset and start again. Yeah. Get a pin or a ballpoint pen and push that button in on the back and get yourself a new Tamagotchi. Number two on the list of the top six toys that need to be in Toy Story 5,

the villain has to be a Furby. Oh, okay. Those are demonic. They were satanic. Because they'd kick off in the middle of the night, wouldn't they? Yeah. They're furbish. Horrible.

Very scary language. Very scary. And number one on the list of the top six toys that need to be in Toy Story 5 to replace Woody are that toy in Mum's bedside drawer. Mr. Rabbit. Mr. Rabbit. Mr. Rabbit. Mr. Rabbit. The seizure-pr prone latex man.

Fluro smooth rabbit. That's all he can say. Yeah. Quick, they're coming. Are they? What did you just say? You're turning yourself off. No, I think. The humans are coming. You they? What did you just say? You're turning yourself off. No, I think the humans are coming.

You've got to turn it off after they're coming. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've got to turn it off. Jesus. You really. You walked right into that one. I'm innocent in this. You are not innocent.

I'm innocent. You're a nerdy, naughty, naughty, naughty little boy. That is today's self-sex. Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. You're a nerdy, naughty, naughty, naughty little boy. That is today's Top 6. Now, I think this is more for the people that put their, if you're travelling overseas, you know when you put your wallet, your passport in the hotel safe? Yes. Very easy if you've got an early flight or you're rushed or flustered,

just to rush out the door. Oh, yeah. You check out, you get to the airport and you're like, oh, that's right. My passport and my money are all in the hotel safe. Yes. Her tip, this flight attendant, she says she does it every time she goes away. She puts a shoe, one of her shoes that she wears, in the safe with her passport and her money. So she goes to leave and she's like, where's my other shoe? That's right, it's in the safe. It wears in the safe with her passport and her money. So she goes to leave and she's like, where's my other shoe?

That's right, it's in the safe. It's in the safe. But what if you've got multiple pairs of shoes? Now not only have you lost your wallet and your passport, but also one of your favourite shoes. Well, there's that too, yeah. Because I do this if I've made breakfast for myself, I put my keys on it. Right.

You know what I mean? And then when you go to leave the house to lock the door or whatever or open your car, you can't because you don't know where they are and then you find them and you're like, that's right, I made a quiche. I made quiche. I made quiche. I've been having pastry free quiches this week.

Haven't forgotten it once. I would never have put pastry on a quiche. Quiche has pastry. No, you're making a pie now. No. No, a quiche doesn't have pastry. Yes, it does. No, it doesn't have pastry. You're thinking of a frittata. No, no, no.

No, frittata's a meaty a quiche. Quiche. One moment, please. Oh, my God. Crust. It's got a crust. No. A French tart is a quiche.

If I don't want to forget something, I'll post it notes. We talked about post-its. I just need to clarify. If you can shut your face for a minute, we're arguing whether or not a quiche has pastry. A quiche? A tart has pastry. You moved on to a tart. I won't listen to you. I don't want you two finding over this.

A quiche is a French tart consisting of pastry crust filled with savoury custard and pieces of cheese, meat, seafood or vegetables. Custard? No, that's a sweet. That's what egg is. Custard? Yeah. No, custard is vegetables. Custard. No, that's a sweet. That's what egg is. Custard. Yeah. No, custard is custard. Egg is egg. Egg is scrambled egg. Custard is

like mixed eggs with sugar. I've never had a quiche. I've never had quiche with pastry. Savory custard is just like milky, creamy egg. Beaten and scrambled egg. Without the sugar. Yeah. I will never in my life call that a savoury custard. That's egg. Yeah, we're not debating the custard part.

We are. We've added to our debate. A quiche has pastry. A frittata is pastry-less. Right. Please flip. So how do you remember? A frittata is a media quiche.

How do you remember your frittata or quiche in the morning? I put my keys by the quiche. Yeah. I put my keys by it so that when you go to leave, you go, oh, my keys. Yes. They're with the quiche. Because I'll do that too. I'll put the keys on something that I need to remember.

And then it's quite nice when you pick up the keys, you're like, ooh, chilly. Yes. They're quite cold now and fresh. Wait, you put your keys in the fridge? Yeah. Hang on, the bigger question is, are you putting your quiche on the bench top? No, I'll put a post-it note on my wallet to say quiche. Quiche in the fridge.

There's so many methods here. But then you'll forget about it and you'll go out to a shop and you'll go like, oh, that's $5.50, please. You go, hang on, you pull out your wallet and it just has a label saying quiche on it. Quiche. People are going, did you forget your quiche? Yeah.

I think we'll clarify it. A lot has happened in this break. A lot has happened. Quiche has pastry. I will never, I will never,, I mean I'm looking at photos now and Queesh Lorraine has pastry and Queesh has pastry but I grew up with a pastry-less Queesh. That's a frittata.

Well it wasn't a frittata. It wasn't bulky enough. A frittata is a pastry-less Keesh. To me a frittata has got a lot of stuff in it. You grew up with a naked Keesh. I grew up with a naked Keesh. Poor. God your mum must have had to scrub some dishes. There was Nana always made the quiche.

Oh, right, okay. Nana always made the quiche. Yeah, right. And mum now makes Nana's quiche. And if I was going to make a quiche, I'd never put pastry in it. She would have had to have had a lot of steel wool. How did she stop the pastry from going royal doggy? It was a pre-cook.

Parbake. Parbake the pastry, then pour the egg mix in, or this savoury custard mix. Yeah. Jesus. Well, take off one of your shoes, put it in the fridge. With the quiche. With the quiche.

Put the shoe in the quiche. Yep. And then you won't forget your passport and wallet next time you're at a hotel. Now, some messages in. If you've never had quiche with pastry, Vaughan, you've only ever eaten a frittata.

It's a dry pastry. It's a frittata. I'm sorry. It's not a frittata. It is. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Fletch Vaughan and Hayley

Silly little poe Silly little poe It is so silly, silly, silly That the silly little poe Silly Little Poll. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little poll. Silly Little Poll. Silly Little Poll. Silly Little Poll. Silly Little Poll.

Today's Silly Little Poll is do you watch Bluey? A great animated Australian animated kids show. It's like seven minutes per episode. How'd this question get through? Do you know what? I was at home scrolling and I was like, we didn't talk about this.

We didn't talk about this. Is this Chanelette Pajamas? Have you teamed up with Vaughn Smith here? You don't need to do everything Vaughn says. You don't need to do everything Vaughn says. I had so many responses the other day when my wife put up a video of me watching Bluey and eating my lunch. And then I shared the post and just everyone's like, yes, how good's Bluey?

And then people were warning me about episodes that'll make me cry. And I appreciate the heads up. That's not what the poll is for. It should be for like, do you put on your pants before you talk? Exactly. Bluey is a blue healer. I'm just ignoring these two. Bluey's got a younger sister

Mom and dad Did he threaten you If you didn't post this Have you been bullied into this No no no I'm down on the Bluey train I know about these I know about these Gen Z's

I know what's cool with the kids I'm Tik Tok'ing I'm bit bopping I'm flip flopping I don't know what to do here Do you watch Bluey Do we walk We could walk

We could Well we could just Go to the We could go get brunch We just go to the cafe. I like to think, whilst 26% of people say yes, 74% said no. I'm like to think

it'll be at least 50-50 after this poll because everyone's like, I must look into this Bluey. TVNZ Plus on there. Ad-free because it's for kids and they can't target advertising towards children. What's that? It's for kids. Oh, that is's for kids and they can't target advertising towards children. What's that?

It's for kids. Oh, that is a meme. Ben and Holly was another one when my kids were little. Ben and Holly was a fantastic show for children, but there was many a joke in there that the mayor in Ben and Holly

was based on Boris Johnson. Right. He was a bumbling fool. Brittany, Brittany says, are you an adult? If so, you don't watch it. And then judgy face. And you know what? That says more about her than it says about anybody else. Yeah If so, you don't watch it. And then Judgy Face. And you know what?

That says more about her than it says about anybody else. Yeah, look, I'm not Team Brittany. I'm just not Team Bluey. Brittany's mean. Did anyone else message in? Yep. Marie says, it's relaxing. We had one response.

It's relaxing content. First you're watching it with the kids, then it's five episodes later and your kids aren't in the room anymore, but you're watching it and you feel so wholesome. Very wholesome. Very wholesome content. First you're watching it with the kids, then it's five episodes later and your kids aren't in the room anymore, but you're watching it and you feel so wholesome. Very wholesome. Very wholesome content. I have two kids under five. Bluey is literally life, says Henry. Right. Bluey is

life. Ali. Oh, Jesus. Here we go. Absolutely not! I had to listen, watch it on TV in the after hours in the middle of the night for four hours on repeat. Oh, so she's trauma. It's trauma.

It's trauma for her. Her kids would wake up screaming because they wanted to watch Bluey. They had it. They just had it on TV and Zed On Demand, and it wouldn't stop playing, and there wasn't a child in sight. What? I had to listen, watch it, watch it play on TV at the after hours. Oh. Not after hours. I see. She was working the after hours. Oh.

Not after hours. I see. She was working an after hours doctor or nurse. Made worse by the fact my phone was flat for three of those four hours. Give me an infomercial on Thin Lizzy or an Ab Circle Pro over Bluey. Yeah. I don't know, Ali. Those infomercials are terrible.

Nothing's worse than when you put on TV and it says down in the bottom what's on and it says infomercials. I know, Ali. Those infomercials are terrible. Nothing's worse than when you put on TV and it says down on the bottom what's on and it says infomercials. I know. And you're like, oh, God. I've got abs of steel. Thanks to those infomercials. You do.

Bridget says, no, because I'm 46, not four. Well, I mean. There's a bit of a pile on. It is. The age of themselves, though. Yeah, I'm sorry that we were a bit vague. Well again, yeah. I mean, I just wonder

if we should have done this. I wonder if it's relevant. Sean says, no, but my American friend does and he said he thinks our pass the parcel game is stupid. So I said,

you're stupid. Do they not play pass the parcel in America? They can't play pass the parcel. They've never played it. Pass the parcel rules. With so many layers. It's like a America. They can't be a pass the parcel. They've never played it. Pass the parcel rules. There's so many layers. It's like a prison.

In every lane, you get an onion. It's like a fun, it's like an onion with prison. Or a bangle. It's got to be flat. Or a wand. It's got to be a flat gift.

Becca says, I work at a daycare and we'll play Bluey episodes any time they even slightly relate to what we're learning about. Love that show. Educational. Wholesome.

Good time. So wait, so we're paying to send kids to these early education things and they're just chucking the tally on. They'll chuck a bluey on. Having a durry out the front. Yeah, they'll probably ask about it.

Keeping an eye on them. The producers actually consider the realistic side of parenting and make it funny. I don't even care when my kids wander off and I'm left watching it alone, says Shannon. Big bluey fan.

And Erin said, it's the best show of all time. My kids have gotten a bit bored of it now, but my husband and I still pour a wine and have an easy Friday night in front of the telly. Watching Bluey. I wish I was married to Bandit. Bandit is the best dad in TV history. You know, dads are always like the bumbling fools.

Yeah. Bandit is like super fun. And he plays with the kids at the drop of the hat and sometimes he wants to watch cricket. Best TV show in history. It's pretty great.

Heard of The Sopranos. Slightly different audience. Breaking Bad. Yeah. The Wire. I haven't heard the C word in Bluey yet. I doubt I will.

Death, murder, a lot of murder. No murder. Strip clubs. No strip clubs. No, no, no, no, no. Nothing like that. Nothing like that. Okay. murder, a lot of murder. No murder. Strip clubs. No strip clubs. No, no, no, no, no, no. Nothing like that. Nothing like that.

Okay. Well, not in the episodes, obviously. Anybody getting a whack? No one's getting whacked. No one's getting whacked. No one's getting whacked. Well, you've lost me. There's silly little pop.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's it? That's all you wanted to say? That was all I wanted to say Go to the next song then You were talking the other day About red velvet cupcakes

No Cupcakes Hot cross buns Where did you see them? They popped up in Australia They were in Australia Australia's gone real bananas Don't mess with a classic

With the hot cross buns this year I love it Cinnamon Fruit filled Super zesty Hot cross bun A dense heavy hot cross bun Supermarkets I love it. Cinnamon. A fruit-filled, super zesty hot cross bun. A dense, heavy hot cross bun. Cross bun.

Supermarkets. I want it sticky on top. I want it glazed heavily. Supermarkets don't normally have the best ones. They're the cheap, bad sweet juice. Yeah, but they're good at a pinch. They're good at a pinch. You just need to add way more butter.

Yes. Half butter, half bun. But when an artisan bakery sets its mind to doing some hot cross bun. The ones we get. The ones we get. The ones we get. Yeah. Zing them. So good.

Will Costco have hot cross buns? Okay. Do you reckon they'll be massive? They might be massive because they do those massive muffins. In packs of like 40. Yeah. Okay. Literally, like one of their muffins, my mum is obsessed with them.

She bought a six pack for the girls. And I was just like, what are we going to do with these? Literally a quarter of them, you cut one into four and it squeezes into a lunchbox. Wow. America, right? It's like a cake.

It's ridiculous. Yum. But Coles in Australia have launched some new hot cross bun flavours. One of them I'd be down to try. Carrot cake. Yum. Carrot cake. It. Similar in the spice as well. Yes, I love a spicy carrot cake.

I love carrot cake. I can't say no to a carrot cake. A carrot cake can be quite sloppy and oily and dense. Have we done Friday rankings? Have we done cakes? Next week. Next week, put it in the log. Carrot cake's already won, but it'll be interesting what else is in the rankings. Banana cake. Carrot cake's already won, but it'll be interesting to see what else is in the rankings.

Let's just do it now. Banana cake. Carrot cake's number one. It's savoury. Banana cake with chocolate icing or banana cake with like a tangy lemon icing? Tangy lemon. Tangy lemon.

Tangy lemon. Yeah, tangy lemon. So a carrot cake hot cross bun, that's just not a mini carrot cake? How is it different? No, but it would be bread chocolate cake. Yeah, it's more bread than cake. So I reckon instead of the fruit, you'd have carrot,

and the spices would be slightly more carrot cake spice than hot cross bun, and then the top would be cream cheese. Well, you're not taking out the sultanas for the carrot. I'd leave them both in. It's an amalgamation. Nothing needs to disappear. I don't know about this. Not that you add.

Carrot, more spice. Can't keep adding. Less is more. More zest. No, more is more. Less is more. More zest. No. More is more. Less is more. More is more.

That is not the flavour. No. That has got people disgusted. Oh, I know. Because in a pack of four, available for Coles, limited edition is special burger sauce hot cross buns. This is a hot cross bun

with essentially a very heavy pickle flavour. Pickle-y, tomato-y. Now, I love burger sauce. I think, and I know this will upset some, but I think it should be the nation's sauce. It should take over from tomato sauce. No, don't be ridiculous. Oh, that's a big call.

You need to sit down. You need to calm down. Burger sauce. That's a big call. No. It's a huge call. You can't put it on everything. Yes, you can.

If you're a politician, that would lose you the election just then. Just then. You've lost my vote, that's for sure. Tomato. Whitlocks. Tomato. Maybe I'm ahead of my time. I'm not on the wrong side of history.

I'm just ahead of my time. Okay. You know? Burger sauce hot cross buns. Yeah. So is the sauce in the bun or the flavouring of the sauce is through the bun? The sauce is baked through it. It's not like a cold sauce is in it.

It's used as an ingredient in the making of it. But are the spices of the hot cross bun still in there? I don't... Your cinnamon, your nutmeg. No. Because they're a savoury bun with special burger sauce and added pickle pieces topped with indulgent, tasty cheese. Okay, so just imagine this.

You put them in half and then you use them as like a mousetrap or a cheese toastie. Put cheese on it. And you put spag on top. You put spag or something on top and then toast them. Why couldn't they just do that to a normal bun? Why are they going to come for the hot cross? I feel like the cross is just Easter-ing it up.

Yeah. The cross is what makes it Easter. This doesn't sound too much like, it sounds like a savoury bun. Somebody said previously one year Coles did jalapeno and cheese hot cross buns. I'm sort of back. I'm sort of back. See, I'm sort of back now too because if you come at it from a savoury perspective. I know, but it's hard.

Not a butter toasted perspective. It's hard to change my mind. I've just but it's hard. Not a butter toasted perspective. It's hard to change my mind. I've just been on, I'm on Nicole's website. This is a supermarket in Australia. They do hot cross buns, fruit free. Yeah, we do them in. What is that? At Countdown.

That's just spicy bun. Spicy bun without the sultanas and raisins. And fruit bread. Why bother? Why not just buy a bun? Yeah, but it's like people that don't like, they buy yogurt, but without the sultanas and raisins. And fruit. Why bother? Why not just buy a bun? Yeah, but it's like people that don't like, they buy yogurt but without the fruit. Oh yeah, I do that.

You don't need fruit. It's the same reason because you don't want the lumpy bits. Nobody wants the lumpy bits in yogurt. Yeah. I like the lumpy bits in yogurt. They also do hot cross buns chocolate. I know the supermarkets here do the same.

And they also do a Coles hot cross buns apple and cinnamon. You see, that makes sense. I like that supermarkets here do the same. And they also do a Coles Hot Cross Buns Apple and Cinnamon. You see, that makes sense. I like that. That makes sense. I've just scrolled further down in my Googling and come across a four and a half star recipe for Hot Cross Beef Burgers with Spicy Slaw, which is

a burger on a traditional sweet Hot Cross Bun. That would be quite good. Hot cross bun lamb burger is a five-star recipe on whisk.com. Oh, my God, yum. A delicious way to have fun with your hot cross buns this Easter. It just feels wrong. It just feels so wrong.

Because Jesus wouldn't have wanted it? Jesus would be so upset. How dare you speak on behalf of our Lord and Savior? I'm not. He's speaking through me. He's speaking through you. Sorry. You are the chosen one.

What does he think of the pickle hot cross bun? He's into it. Yeah, well, he doesn't judge, you see. He does not. That's what the modern Christian often forgets. The Lord was without judgment. For let he who hath not sinned cast the first stone. If you've just tuned in, it's not Radio Rima or Life FM.

But you asked what Jesus would think of his modern bun representative. He'd probably be quite upset with the cost of living at the supermarket. He'd be angry at the greed. He would be livid. He'd be flipping tables like he did in Sodom. Memory went to the markets. Okay, no one else was raised Catholic. No one stopped. It's what Sodom. Memory went to the markets. Okay, no one else was raised Catholic. No, Vaughn, stop.

It's what Sodomy's named after. Yeah. Sodom, the city of Sodom. I don't know if this is great content right now. Yeah, I don't know. At 16.7. You don't want to know the origins of the word Sodomy. I do not know.

I don't know that I need to. No. Well, you do now. Tough. Did he used to work in a hospital? Yeah, and he just had enough of people not bringing their plates back up because they were running sort of a small restaurant. So he called them all sodomites.

And then flipped the tables. Oh, wow. Drama queen. Why do you have to give it a read? Sounds action-packed, this book. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Ailey. Play ZM. But have you guys been on Jason Momoa's Instagram this morning? No.

New video. Where we going? Is that why you've been... He's working out. He's working out. He's working out. In New Zealand? I don't know.

I don't know. He's doing a little workout. And he's... It doesn't have a shirt on. Wow. Now I'm supposed to give you the five lies he doesn't have a shirt on. Wow. Now I'm supposed to give you the five lies you should tell in a job interview. I'm distracted. You are.

I'm utterly distracted. I've been told we're running a little bit late. I don't know what. I can't function. It's probably best you don't meet him. I'm drinking a libido drink at work. Why are you drinking a libido drink at work for? It's got ashwagandha.

Not ashwagandha. And I'm absolutely feeling the ashwagandha. Oh, no, the ashwagandha. You can't be drinking that. Just keep that away from Fletch because I've seen him on ashwagandha. It's a bloody. Oh, my God. I know he's unstoppable.

It's really something. I see a bloody... Oh my God. I know he's unstoppable. It's really something. I just need a little bit of cold water. A recruiter, a career coach has encouraged employees to lie in their interviews and she has given,

her name is Anna, 15 years of experience. All right. Not as much as you two have in your area. Chosen field. But she has given the five things

that you should lie about, you should lie about in a job interview. Okay. First, where you see yourself in five years. A very common question, I think, in a lot of job interviews. She said nobody wants to hear it. They don't want to see that you see yourself getting married

and having children. She urges job seekers to say that they see themselves at the company that they're applying for. Oh, wow. Very forward. Where do you see yourself in five years? I see myself here, working for you, providing you a fantastic service.

You see through that bullshit, though, wouldn't you, as a manager? This is an expert in her field, 15 years experience. I hate that question. Why do they even ask it? I know. Where do you see yourself in five years? I mean, ideally, if I win Lotto, on a beach, not here.

Not here at your shitty company. I want to own a boat. I don't know. Number two, lie about why you are looking for a job. So if you, maybe you're, because if you're leaving a company, maybe you hate the culture of your company, you're working and you're unhappy there, that's alarm bells for them because they're going like,

oh, they don't fit into a company mold. They have trouble getting on with people. I just need a new challenge. You know, I've outgrown my last workplace. Oh my god. She says, it's better to say you have outgrown your last position and are looking for a new challenge. See, I know

all the lies. There he is. He just walked into this job. Number three, how you feel about your current boss and co-workers. Love them. We all get on. This apparently is an inevitable question in every interview, but candidates often believe their prospective employer

wants to hear that they dislike their current job. So being like, I don't like it there. I want to work here. Far from the truth. I don't care if you want to work for the most, you know,

like nice person or terrible person. I want to know that you can work in any environment. Number four, what are your hobbies? Don't give a shit. Yeah. Basically.

You should already, your hobbies should align with your professional career, basically. So we don't want to, if you're applying for a job in radio and you ride horses, It's not going to work. It doesn't matter. Yeah. But what if you're applying for a job as like, I don't know, like you're entering data at a company. Love tech. An insurance company.

I love computers. I love data. I just love numbers. I love're entering data at a company. Love tech. An insurance company. I love computers. I love data. I just love numbers. I love Netflix shows about the insurance industry. There you go. Yeah, that's my hobby. That's the only one you should bring up. Yeah, okay, great.

The last one is your current job description and your title. She encourages job seekers to embellish the roles that they perform at their current workplace. It's like that time you said their current workplace. Everyone does that. You said you ran Shell. You were the CEO. Correct. But you were just the forecourt person.

That's also correct. She said especially if you've been working above and beyond your job description and you haven't been getting paid for it. So if you're working in a smaller role but you actually have been doing a lot of managerial things, then you should say I was a manager. Yeah. Okay.

So just lie, lie, lie. Walk yourself into a job and have a happy long career. Great tips. Built on lies. Yeah. Fantastic. The world is built on lies. It is.

Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Maisie Peters, who is with us right now. The world is built on lies. It is. Maisie Peters, who is with us right now. Thank you so much for joining us. Thank you very much. Hello. Hello. Now, can I just say, we saw Ed last week? Yeah, in Wellington.

In Wellington. And I was so blown away by you, not only because you're an incredible talent and I thought your set was amazing, but how you handled the situation of Wellington. That was a tricky one. So for people that don't know,

weren't there, 48,000 people were, some sound issues. There were some technical issues. At one point, you were like this and no sound was coming.

Oh, that's good. My God, I was just watching you going, what a professional. You were just, you didn't stop. You kept going stop You kept going You kept entertaining us

I wouldn't even hear you I would have had a tanty And yelled at someone Yeah No I didn't I was just sort of Merrily laughing to be fair It's all

It's all fun and games At the end of the day I was sort of I was I was having a good time I love though when you came Because you kept having to Leave the stage

And they were trying to Sort it out Obviously there was some Stress under the stage Oh you have no idea. And then you would come up and be like, I'm so sorry. I was like, Maisie, it's not your fault. It's whoever.

That's true. I was trying to be like, it's not you, it's me, but it's not even me really. Like, it's sort of a, it's a wider issue. Yeah. But you know what was funny? So everyone was so nice. I was saying about Wellington. I was, after the Ed show the next day, I was just exploring and I was on Cuba Street where

there's a lot of things. I know, I'm from Wellington. I kept bumping. Okay. So I Street where there's a lot of things. No, no, I'm from Wellington. Okay, so I kept bumping into a lot of people and they were so sweet and friendly and everyone was just like, you were great. Like, was really sorry about all the issues. And I was like, it's not your fault. We're sorry.

No, not my fault. Whose fault is it? Who knows? Are they sorry? And then there was one woman and she was so iconic and we all, she's become like our holy saviour. And there was this one woman and we bumped into her and she was like, hey, you know, I saw you last night.

She was like, oh, like, you seemed really great. We're really sorry about your sound issues. Like, we were just like this the whole day. And then demonstrated like putting her fingers in her ears. And I was like, oh. I was like, oh, I'm sorry about that. Oh, okay. She's like, no, it's not your fault.

You know, it was just like this. I was like, oh, cool, cool, cool. And then she goes goes and all my friends are there we're all just watching like this is amazing and she's like yeah but you know like i you know i looked you up after that and i'm thinking like i'm sure lots of people felt really sorry for you and looked you up and you'll probably you know you might get like a new zealand fan base from that and i was like yeah you're right like a pity fan base i would like i would like a pity fan base yeah and then uh pity fan base and then that was the end

of our conversation and we were like she is an icon so I love whoever she is in Wellington I hope she knows she's an icon

an icon well most Wellingtonians are what did you think of the bucket fountain when you were on Cuba did you like that okay I'm not gonna lie it was really hyped up to me

and it was a little bit underwhelming oh my god you can't say that about the fountain I don't know if you can say that but I mean like it was really nice still but did you get't say that about the fountain. I don't know if you can say that. But I mean, like it was really

nice still. But did you get the big buckets at the bottom because they really surprise you and have a lot of water in them? I can feel your tone

as you're taking the piss. I love the big buckets and the small buckets. You know what, I'm saying a lot of things right now because I'm saying all of this and I did

go back to the bucket fountain like three times. Oh wow. You know what, I'm sure it captured me in ways I can't even express or understand. But did you go back three times because you're like,

no, they did say it was good and I haven't seen the good yet, so I'm going to give it another chance. Or did I just go back because the street is like not that long, so I just sort of ended up back there, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But all of those reasons, it could be any of them. Now, you spoke about having to go off stage and go underneath the stage and people in Wellington would have seen the incredible setup that Ed Sheeran has.

Oh, my God. It's a circular stage in the middle of the field. It rotates. It goes up and down. What's underneath there? Oh, I can't tell you. It's a secret. Oh, my God.

I knew it was going to be a secret. It's really wild, though. Is it? Is it like a... There's moving parts. Is there very much like, don't put your fingers in there? Yeah, sort of circus vibes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Behind the scenes, dangers. Like lions, monkeys kind of things. Yeah, yeah. Can we take a step back? Because you started busking. I did. Then you moved on to online. Now you're playing to like tens of thousands of people around the world

with one of the biggest stars in the world, Ed Sheeran. How do you feel? Are you shocked? Are you in a whirlwind? Or are you like, yes, this feels right because I'm extremely talented? I think that I like to just sort of not think too much because you just sort of take each day as it comes and you just sort of try your best and yeah, do like as best as I can with the amazing opportunities that I'm achieving, that I'm receiving.

But it is really crazy for sure. Like if you ever like take a step and really think about it, I'm achieving, that I'm receiving. But it is really crazy for sure. Like if you ever like take a step and really think about it, I'm sure I would like spiral into all sorts of places. Don't do that. No, that's the thing. I just don't. I just simply repress and move forward. Yeah.

But no, it's amazing. And I'm very grateful. I'm very lucky to do what I do and get to like travel the world and see all these places and play to all these people. It's really cool. Final question. I know I'm hounding you. I'm just a very big and new fan of yours. Thank you. What's next?

You've got all these amazing bangers out. You're travelling the world. New album. Everyone's going to know your name. What's the plan, Stan? Well, I'm on tour with Ed. We're going to Australia next after these shows. Yes. And then I'm doing some shows in Australia and then I'm doing some shows in Asia.

And then I do have another album coming out this year. So I can't tell you when, but it is this year and it is vaguely soon. Sooner rather than later, some would say. I'm loving watching this tiptoeing. Yeah. Information you can't tell us. The thing is, is I have such a huge, huge, huge mouth

and I would tell you everything. I'm very conscious when I'm doing all these interviews to be like, don't. You know that meme of Clement? of information you can't tell us. The thing is, I have such a huge, huge, huge mouth and I would tell you everything. I'm very conscious when I'm doing all these interviews to be like, don't. You know that meme of Clare in the cloak being like, don't. That's how I feel, me to me. So more music

and hopefully some more touring. We get to see you again, chat to you again and follow you along on this amazing journey. I would love that. I'm very keen to come back. So hopefully...

Well, they won't want you back in Wellington after what you said about the fountain. You've absolutely dissed the fountain. Guys, I didn't diss the fountain. I had to come back. So hopefully... Well, they won't want you back in Wellington after what you said about the fountain. You've absolutely dissed the fountain. Guys, I didn't diss the fountain. I had to be honest. I assume like all interviews are sort of like the, you know, the justice system where you have to tell the truth.

So I just, I had to tell the truth. Yeah. On behalf of Wellington, we're quite upset with you, Maisie. I hate this narrative. I want no part in this narrative. I want to I want to

take it all back and say I love the Bucket Fountain I love the Bucket Fountain I love that well maybe you could call the new album Bucket Fountain

that's an idea songs from a bucket fountain I love ideas keep having them my friend it's just an idea you keep that one and you really really need on it

that's just for you Wellington's upset but the Maisie Peters pity party where we stoked you back. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. It runs on pure pity alone. There's

no respect for talent. It's just pure pity. That's what I love. It doesn't matter. Maisie Peters, thank you so much for joining us. Thank you for having me. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I was just looking up whether or not Mercury is in retrograde. And it's not.

So I just cannot figure out why everyone is grumpy at the moment. Yesterday, I woke up grumpy. And do you think there's been less people at the gym this week? Yeah. I said to my PT, like, oh my God, I'm finding it so hard this week. She's like, yeah, I've had a lot of people saying that. And then I said to someone, another friend of mine, I said, I'm so grumpy today. She's like, oh my God, I'm finding it so hard this week. She's like, yeah, I've had a lot of people saying that. And then I said to someone, another friend of mine, I was like, I'm so grumpy today.

She's like, oh my God, same. She's like, everyone I talk to is. I was like, yeah. Oh, shivers. Everyone I talk to is grumpy. Mercury's not in retrograde until April 21st. So seriously, I'm in a lot of trouble. Wait.

The moon is in Virgo. The moon is in Virgo. This is my other option. What does that mean? Mars is no longer in retrograde and it's in its post-retrograde shadow until March 15. No major retrogrades to report. But if you, are all of your crystals recharged?

Shit. That'll be it. That'll be it. What's your star sign again, Sproul? Libra. Let me check Libra. Are you googling why is a Libra good? Look at the stars for me.

Today's energies are good for relationship repair, dear Libra. Honesty and vulnerability in your interactions are integral to the growing and improving. Me and Aaron are both Libras. You may help someone through a problem. That was me. You helped me get to work today. I did. Because I am not the high-profile radio person who lost their license

and been four times over the limit just before New Year's. Yes, yeah. I am not. You've got to state that now. Hayley isn't either because she drove me. The other day you said I came to work.

I got a ride with Vaughn. You got a ride with Vaughn. I have not lost my licence. Suspicion. No, no, no, no, no. Yet. You may help someone through a problem.

That was me today. You gave me a lift to work. Pairing relationships. And an interchange can be most productive. I don't know what an interchange is. Like a bus interchange. Go to the interchange.

Even so, it's also a day where you should indulge in some downtime. You got some downtime planned? No, I'm partying. That could be your downtime. That's downtime for me. You said cocktails. Yeah, I'm going to do some cocktails. Yeah, good.

With the moon. I'm going to the Botanical Gardens tomorrow. That's downtime. We're going for a bushwalk. With the moon transiting the sign just behind yours all day, it makes sense to recharge and renew your energy. And my crystals. Yeah.

Well, look, I spoke to a lot of people that are grumpy. They're grumpy all week, even though it's a short week. I'm grumpy. I want to know, are you grumpy? We've done it. Are you sore? Now I want to know if you're grumpy. Why are you grumpy?

And even if you don't know why, just call them and say, yeah, I'm bloody grumpy Yeah, I'm grumpy Maybe we can get to the bottom of it Right Do you think it's just North Island people though Because like We've just had the news

No I've got South Island friends Are grumpy as well Are they grumpy as well? I've got some real shitty South Islanders Yeah No, but they've had the best summer I know they have

And they don't like it They don't like it But the North Island's finally Got something to whinge about Because they love a whinge down south Really? They love a whinge You think it Really? They love a whinge. If you think it's cold up there, try living down there.

Yes. I thought everyone in New Zealand loved a whinge. Oh, we do. We get that from our British. But they've had nothing to whinge about, so they're going to have a whinge about having nothing to whinge about. They're furious. That's why I'm opening up the floodgates here today.

I love it. Have a whinge. Guilt-free whinge. Are you grumpy? Are you grumpy? And why? Like, we need to get to the bottom of this. We might be able to find a common thread.

Why is everyone meh at the moment? Are you taking calls from people that are meh? I'll take a meh. You need a bit of St. John's wort. I wouldn't say I'm grumpy this week. I'm just meh. Flat. You're a crotchety old bastard at the best of times.

Crotchety old bastard. What's on you? What's making you a grizzly? I'm just meh. You're a bit meh. I'm just a bit meh. Meh. Meh.

Well, you called it grumpy. You were grumpy. I was grumpy. You were grumpy yesterday. You're a fine grumpy, though. You're like, I must apologise. This was when I arrived at work. You said to me, I must apologise, I'm grumpy today.

And then you weren't. You were the most grumpy. Aaron and I had to make the beer. We put fresh sheets on yesterday. How good's that? He pulled too fast as we were hooking the fitted bit, and my finger jammed the wall, and I lost it. And then I was putting on the pillowcase,

and it wouldn't go in, and I said, I'm absolutely done with today. So he wore it. It's weird. It's always the ones you love the most that can handle you at your worst day. Absolutely done with today. All right, well, give us a call.

We want to get to the bottom of this. Why is New Zealand in such a mood? Why is New Zealand grumpy? Why are you grumpy? 0800 DARS at Ebberson number, text through. If you're grumpy but you don't know the reason, we're great at barrelling down. Nothing is too pitiful. Nothing is too small

a reason to be grumpy. You bang your knee, it's fine. Why is everybody grumpy at the moment? Everyone's grumpy. Dude, everybody's grumpy. And do you know what? Some people have mentioned, you know, there is just one life-changing event or monumental event after another.

Sometimes you do think, I'm sick of living through this. Oh, jeez. Pandemic. Hang in there. It'll be over soon. Power cost of living. Yes. Bloody. It is stressful at the there. It'll be over soon. Power cost of living. Yes.

Bloody. It is stressful at the moment. Oh, totally. Yeah. But maybe that's not it. Maybe you're going, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know the world's stressful, but actually it's also just a vibe. But just the weather as well.

There just doesn't seem to have been a summer. Maybe your ponytail's too tight. That could do with a loose cut. That'll give you a headache. Honestly, you've just got one tight hair. So you wanted to know, Hayley, why everybody is so grumpy. I missed so many messages and calls through. Marie, why are you grumpy?

I genuinely don't know. This is ridiculous. Let's break it down. So I started my week on Monday and I had the day off. So that was great. Good. And I was out mowing the lawns and I finished and I came inside and I was like, for some reason, I'm grumpy.

I speak to my fiance just to he's up. For some reason, I'm grumpy. You've got to warn him. You've got to warn him. Nice of you to give a warning. Yeah, exactly. And I said, you know what? Like, it's not menstrual, but for some reason, I'm just grumpy.

And he's like, well, that's just bullshit. So, you know, I changed the attitude. Oh, now you've got your reason. Now you've got your reason. Is it the weather? I was a big girl and I was like, okay, just take me into breath. And I went into work the next day. I was like, right, Marie, you're going to have a good attitude.

You're going to go in and you're going to rock this week. Good on you, Marie. Yeah, so I went into work and every other person there was grumpy as hell and I was like, what is going on with everyone? And because everyone was grumpy as hell, everyone just goes an absolute half-assed job

and it meant that it all trickled down to the end of the week where we are now and it was an absolute shit show. You've answered your own question as to why you're grumpy. It's a snowball effect. Yeah. It started with your fiancé. That's what my theory is.

It's a snowball effect. And I don't know where it started. I live on the west coast of the South Island. We've had an amazing summer. Beautiful summer. Oh, now I'm grumpy. I don't know where that little trickle came from. So it's not the weather.

But it definitely didn't come from the west coast. It's got to be the moon, Marie. It's the only come from the West Coast. It's got to be the moon, Marie. It's the only thing I can think of. It's got to be the moon. Are your crystals charged fully? Well, I don't know how to charge a crystal, but now I might just have to Google it. I think you plug them into your car.

I think, yeah. You push it in the cigarette lighter. USB. No, they're USB now. Oh, are they? Yeah, they're all USBs. They come with a little toggle at the bottom. A little dongle.

Oh, well, Marie, I hope you cheer up. Yeah, I hope you have a better week next week, Marie. It's nice knowing we're not alone. Dude, we're not alone. Well, I'm not even grumpy. And I think that's making me happier that I'm reading about all these stories of grumpiness. I'm grumpy because I wasn't grumpy, but my missus is grumpy and now I'm grumpy. Maybe that was Marie's partner.

Maybe he told her to sort her shit out. Yeah. And that'll always make someone really, you know, whenever I'm told just to buck up my ideas and sort out my attitude, it definitely makes me want to. Oh, cheers me right up. Yeah. I'm grumpy because my husband's attitude sucks at the moment.

He's so pessimistic. Supermarket's so expensive. And my bloody kids won't stop fighting. Reason enough. I'm grumpy. Bulk buy and taser the kids. You can't taser children. We don't stop fighting. Reason enough. That's why they're grumpy. Bulk buy and taser the kids. You can't taser children. We don't do that.

I'm grumpy because my boyfriend isn't putting out. He's not putting out because when he cooked food, I laughed because he burnt two minute noodles. He had hurt feelings. And he's grumpy so he's not putting out. Also, that's not going to last. How can you burn two minute noodles? He's a dude.

I don't know how you do that. Show him the boobies. He'll forget the noodles ever happened. He will. Play ZM's Fletch for the

Nelly. Play ZM. Why is everybody so grumpy at the moment? I know. Everybody's grumpy. If you're not

grumpy, this isn't for you. If you're not grumpy, it must be nice. Watch, I'm going to, I just, I found some sage in the studio. Okay. Light it. It's in. Watch, I'm going to, I just, I found some sage in the studio.

Okay. Light it. In the office, I'm going to just light that. Okay, fantastic. And you found some calming music. Yeah, I've got some Tabetan healing bowls. Tabetan or Tabetan? Tabetan.

No, these are the ones I use to go to sleep. Okay, I'm just providing a calm energy. Calm energy. We're going to get rid of the grumpiness. We're going to chase it away. Why'd you turn off my... I didn't. You turned them off.

I didn't turn off my singing bowls. Your singing bowls. There you go. What'd you press there? I changed the window and it stopped them. You have to stay on the window. I pay for YouTube premium. We'll just leave it on the window.

This is making me grumpy because it's switching on It's switching on Please forgive me Lee Why are you grumpy? It's got to be the weather And it's not just because It's been really shitty weather

Everything's damaged and the roads are closed And you're sitting in traffic all the time I'm just so grumpy I'm shouting at everybody in my home. Yeah, I know. We've got a cyclone on the way, don't we? And another cyclone coming, yeah. And I'm supposed to be leaving on Monday,

flying out to Queensland for a conference and I'm not going to get there. Yeah. Can we go early? I was so bad yesterday. Yeah. Go early. And your phone reception's not the best. Yeah. Don't go early? I put that yesterday. Yeah. Go early. And your phone reception's not the best.

Yeah. Go get him. Go get him. Lee, good luck getting to that. Sweet Lee, hold on. I'm going to blow a little sage your way. I don't know if that does it. That sounds like a hitter right in the face.

Steve, why are you grumpy? I'm grumpy. G'day. I'm grumpy because, well, this morning I went out for milking the cows, dairy farming, up early, as I was about to hop out of the house. It was wet underneath my armpit, and it turned out to be cat piss. How did a cat piss on your armpit? So it's been happening for a couple of months now.

Me and my wife are going back and forth, and any time I leave a piece of clothing on the ground, the cat pisses on it. Yeah, marking its territory. You know its territory. The cat hates you. Your wife's cat actually hates you. How old is the cat?

Because this is a sign of cat dementia too. Yes, yeah, yeah. Well, we've had it all tested out and everything. But he's 10 years old. But he's, I think, nothing's wrong with him. We're talking to the vet. Nothing's wrong with him. I think it's more of a...

He's just a priff. Yeah, well, I think it might be a bit of a dominance thing in the household. Oh, alpha male. Big daddy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You should piss on him. Are you allowed to do that? Well, the conversation with my wife this morning is that

if it doesn't start sorting itself out or she knows how to train it or figure it out, I might have to start pissing on her stuff. So we'll see what happens. I think the only people that lose are you guys, really, in your house. Yeah. Have fun killing it. I'm looking at a list of ways to stop your cat urinating in the house. Not a single one of them involves urinating on the cat.

All right. Well, that's an absolute alpha move. Yeah, totally. Steve, let us know how you get on. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. It's the final rankings. We do this every Friday.

We take in an item. It's normally food-based. Aye. Objects, anything really, and we will rank them in order of our favourites. Today, final rankings, food court. Now, I'm just opening up a Westfield. I've just chosen a Westfield.

That's a rated two. I went to, what did you go to? Three, two, one opening up a Westfield. I've just chosen a Westfield. That's a rated two. I went to the, what did you go to? Three, two, one, St. Luke's. My God, we are twins. I mean, and there's a Westfields all over the place. Yeah, there's a Westfields. I was just going for your average. Yeah.

Because there's fancier ones now that have, like, way more options. The trend is fancy food court. And, like, bao. Oh, yeah. I got bao. I love bao. And I got fancy food court. And like bao. Oh yeah, you might get a bao. I got bao. And I got pho. I love pho.

So should we just go for your standard mall anywhere in the country? You always have the same things. So there's like a Japanese, there was always a sushi or like a Japanese bowl. Donburi. Now, are we going to include

show sponsor non-eats? Should we exclude them in order to make it fair? They would, of course. They always, the lines at McDonald's at a food court are always

three or four times more than anywhere else in a food court. Exactly. So let's exclude for this. We'll exclude them. We'll exclude them. Just because

it's number one for late fish. Yeah. I'll start. Okay. Three. I'm going kebab. I love a kebab at a food court. At a food court.'m going kebab. I love a kebab.

At a food court. Like a food court kebab, they stuff. On rice or in the wrap? In the wrap. Okay. Not on rice. It's weird because I've never had one of those before like 2 or 3 a.m. No, during the day you can actually taste the flavours more.

Yeah, right. You're more coherent to understand the subtleties of the chicken. Yes, and the way the tabbouleh works in with... The tabbouleh and the lettuce. The garlic yoghurt. Okay. The single slice of tomato, garlic yoghurt, it's perfect. Okay.

Can I just, at this stage of the game, pause momentarily to ask if we would include a kiosk on the perimeter of the food court? A muffin break, for example. Absolutely not. No. No muffin break. It's got to be in the court.

Absolutely not. It's got to be in the court. I will go to the show's sponsor, McCafe. Absolutely. No, but that's what I'm saying. No, we're not doing a separate cafe in the food court. They're in the court. What about Tank?

Oh, shoot. No. We're doing foods. Okay, No. We're doing foods. Okay. Because tank has never its own thing. That's always in the middle. You can't have it. And we're not doing lullaby kiosks.

It's got to be in the ring. In the ring. It's in the ring. It's got to be in the ring of restaurants. It's got to be in the ring of food. Okay, number two, I'm going Chinese smorgasbord. Don't come for me. Interesting.

Don't you dare overpack that, Paul. Sorry. It depends when you get there. If you're getting a fresh wok straight into the smorgasbord. A fresh wok of honey soy chicken. If you're going to the smorgasbord and it's 3pm

and you're getting some crusty orange chicken. You're between spikes. I'm not saying it's going to make you feel good afterwards. I'm just saying when I walk past famously greasy chicken or greasy Chinese always feels like a good idea and afterwards your stomach and your I'm not saying it's going to make you feel good afterwards. I'm just saying when I walk past. It's delicious. Famously greasy Chinese always feels like a good idea. And afterwards, your stomach and your bowel and everything that involves a poop is like, what have we done?

What have we done? Number one, more curry. More curry. I'm going your taste of India, your little Indias. I'm going for your flaming orange butter chicken, garlic naan, plastic rice. Okay. That Yep. Garlic naan. Plastic rice. Okay. That's what I'm doing. Plastic rice?

Yeah, you know the rice is always a little bit sort of like coated. It's been sitting under a hot... I love it. That's how I like it at the mall. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good stuff. Okay. Dirty, dirty, dirty. Over to you, boys.

I think my number one is Dombery. Love the Dombery. Love the Dombery. Yeah, it's good. I love it. Unless you get the owner-operator Love the Dombery. Love the Dombery. Yeah, it's good. Unless you get the owner-operator of the Dombery kiosk or whatever that kind of, just Japanese rice bowls, right?

Yeah. And then you choose your meat. Yeah. You are exactly describing a Dombery. Yeah, no, but some of them are actually called Dombery, but some of them have different names is what I'm trying to say.

Yeah, they're like salad bowls or something. Yeah, yeah're like salad bowls or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, you know, if you get the part-time student work in there, they don't give a... Tossing it on. A toss about how much meat they put on. But when you get the owner,

oh, it's like a tiny little spoon of meat. And a half a cup. Oh, you're saying he or she are pulling the budget strings. Yeah, and I'm like, give me more meat. Give me more, give me more, give me, give me more meat. Give me more. Give me more. Give me more. That would be my ultimate number one. More curry number two. Yeah.

Because yum. And then I've got a dumpling place. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No Japanese gyozo. Gyozo. Okay, I'll do... What did I say? Gyozo.

Gyozo. The guy with the Muppets with the curly necklace. The Japanese gyozo. Can I please have a Japanese dumpling? I would love the gyozo. I'll go more Chinese. More Chinese three,

Indian two, number one, Don Burrito. Bourne Smith, over to you. I'll tell you what's not on my list. Can I,

rather than final ranking something I would never go where never go near food court fish and chips oh the worst I just think

you block you block one nostril and you blow snot out the other the other one is the food court roast you know when they've got those roast places oh you've got

you're into it I'm kind of into it, but I hadn't even considered that. Yeah, right. No, I'm not into it. Okay, three. Oh, man. Because I have a really good pasta place in my bougie food court. Get out! And I've told you

that one day. We're not including Ponsonby. No, it's not. But I'm saying one day when I'm really hung over I want to get the mac and cheese that they do and then put a butter chicken scoop on top of it. Yes, we've talked about that. A sauce. And it's going to be amazing.

I can't wait to share that with you guys. I just invented Indian-Italian fusion restaurants, which will be the next big thing. Oh, far out. If we don't need it. Italian. We're taking the piss. Italian.

Italian. Yeah, I can't wait to hear what music is. Italian. Italian Italian Yeah I can't Italian Italian Italian Italian Yeah Yeah

Okay so What did I say was three Kebab Kebab Two Curry I'm a curry I'm a bit of a curry snob

I'm a bit of an Indian food snob I love going to an Indian restaurant And getting it all on So that always just looks Too orange No That's what it's about. It's too orange.

That's the experience. And the rice that you mentioned before, like the rice has been under a heat lamp. I love it. Not on steam. It's plastic. Plastic rice. Yeah.

I mean, to be honest, I don't really eat too much of the actual butter chicken chunks. It's more just the sauce and the plastic rice. Yeah. And the naan. So you're going kebab? Curry. And number one would be like a Donbury ricey sushi Japanese cuisine.

Didn't expect that from you. Didn't expect it from you. Well, I think because we all had curry. Is that our number one food court meal? That's going to be number one. Curry's going to win. Because that's the one we all included. Yeah.

And that smell. Yeah. You're walking up there to tank. Oh, I'm going to have a healthy day. And then you're just floating on the scent. One mild butter chicken peas. Is it still $10 for lunch special? Nobody's doing a $10 lunch special.

There's no one doing a $10 lunch special. It's 2020, 2023. I haven't been to a mall since 1987. I hate them. It's 2023. Did I not go to a mall? I haven't been to a mall since 1987. I hate them. It's $50 for rice and curry. Nah, not included. Seems fair. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Today's our fact of the day. We talked about the Moiraki Boulders. Aye. Didn't we? Yes. This was during the top six, I think we were talking about.

Because we were considering ranking rocks today. Yeah. We had a bit of banter about Schist, a bit of banter about Hinueta Stone. A bit of banter about Dwayne. The Rock Johnson. Scoria. God, you can't go past a bit of Scoria. Beautiful.

Well, somebody who actually works for the company sent me an email saying, interesting fact, I heard you talk about the Moeraki Boulders. Have you read this New York Times article? And I said, I haven't, Stephanie. Thank you very much for your email. And this is what I... Confluctacious. Do you need me to get it? Because I've got a subscription.

I don't mean to be a... I can read this one for free. What? It must be a freebie. Okay. It's good they're giving some people free ones. It's nice that they're reaching out. It's nice.

From the 8th of February, 2023, this story. Okay. Hot off the press. Extra, extra, read all about it. I can't read. That's my new character. The news boy that can't read. Yeah.

Little do they know. I can't read. So he doesn't know. He has to be told the headlines before he leaves the thing to go out and sell the papers. People are like, tell us the headlines, son. I can't read. Just take the paper, boss. So, it's about the Wainake boulders because they're a mystery.

They're a mystery, but we know they're about 57 million years old, these boulders. Perfectly round. Very unusual. Well, in 2017, the tide cracked some open. Yes. Do you remember this? I remember this, yeah. Do you remember what was found inside?

Lollies. Like a cake. It was a smash cake. It was a smash cake. It was full of Ferrero Rochers. Ferrero Rochers left there by the gods. Yes. Thousands of years ago.

That's how it works. Oh, my God. Fun. Inside the rock included some fossilized bones. Oh. How did they get in there? Well, it turns out they are the bones of an ancient and gigantic ancestor of the penguin. The penguin.

The penguin. The penguin. Were they swallowed up by a lava ball? Are they lava balls? I don't know. Somehow, whatever had formed that rock. Because if that had fallen into the lava, it would have burnt the bones, wouldn't it?

Absolutely. Isn't lava so hot it would just disintegrate everything? Would lava burn your bones? That's why I want to be thrown into an active volcano when I die. Okay, so the Modoki Boulders are said to have formed due to the hardening of mudstone, which was buried in the mudstone cliffs.

And over time, the sea's waves have gradually eroded the softer stone to reveal the spherical formation beneath. But how did the mudstone get so spherical? Because I thought spheres had to form in like perfect space, in the vacuum of space. Let me read this. Let me read this. Let me read this. Hayley's pointing out to God.

No, no. That's an easy way out. That's an easy way out. That's an easy way out, but it's not correct. Well, you science your way out of it. I'll sit back and watch. Well, these penguins weighed 158 kilograms. My goodness.

And stood at five foot two. Oh. Now you can imagine if you were 5'2". That's stocky. That's how the science describes it. Aw. Due to the fact that they were 5'2 and 150 kgs, they were a beefy behemoth.

Oh. Oh my God. Let's not speak ill of the dead. What a horrible way to be described, a minute if that was in your obituary. Body type, are you a pear, an apple? I'm a beefy behemoth. I am an ancient penguin.

I'm 5'2 and 150 kgs. So they are described as a hefty, a hefty, beefy behemoth. What are you reading about now? More about the Mordecai builders. Yeah, they just, I don't know, they just rolled around and they're round.

They rolled around and made them round. They rolled around and they made them round and then they... Fascinating. Fascinating. So these penguins were the size of a black bear,

basically. And they would have been a ferocious... Would they have been delicious with teriyaki? Just asking for a friend? Asking for a friend. They're a fatty bird,

aren't they? Because they... Yeah. Maybe more of like a slow-cooked meat. Yeah. Okay. More slow-cooked. Pop it in the slow time in the very cold water. Slow cooked meat. Yeah. Okay. More slow cooked.

Pop it in the slow cooker and away you go. No wonder there are none left. Yeah. They got eaten up. Well, no, they just died out because they were too big.

So today's fact of the day is in 2017 one of the Moidaka boulders cracked open and inside it was a fossil that led us to the discovery of a gigantic penguin. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. Play ZM. Could be citrus scab in the orange. Could be. That's what she's got on her lime. That's what I've got on my lime tree. Citrus scab. Yuck, you've got a fungus.

I've got a fungus. This is how we're all going to die, like in The Last of Us. No, no, no. You can still have the limes. You can still enjoy the limes. I'm going to let them drop off sort of in winter. You've got a scabby. Thank you to those that messaged me on Instagram

That was why You know when you get A scabby lemon Never knew that was like I thought that's just Homegrown lemons That's what homegrown lemons Look like

They always have a scab on them Turns out they're not meant To look like that And that's a fungus They're not meant to Have a perfect skin Who knew I'm not going to bloody kill you

Who knew You'll be right Yesterday I went to get A beard trim I'm going to a wedding This weekend So I went to get A little tidy up At the old beard-a-roo at the barber's. And I was sat in a seat getting seen to.

Yeah. And there was a little fella with his mum in the seat beside me. Oh, yeah. Now, I don't remember getting haircuts as a child. No, we just got the clippers at home. I'm pretty sure it would have been a... Mum just put a mixing bowl on our head and cut around it. Yep, come here,

sit there, snip, snip, snip. Or somebody did it but I don't ever remember getting haircuts until like later in primary. Yeah, it was a waste of money.

Well, we always just got a number four all over with a fringe. I had a very, I had a fancy bob, straight cut. Oh, fancy bob. Yeah, yeah.

And then when it got out of hand, my mum sent me to Parairi who was the local hairdresser, the only one in the village. And he did a good job. He kept it nice and sharp. He took care of it. Yeah. And then I hacked at my own fringe and chopped it off.

But did you ever, like, cry and carry on? This was a younger child. Yeah, I think younger I would have. Younger child. So, like, mum was doing her best and, you know, the kid just wasn't having it. How old was this kid? Young.

Okay. Four? Yeah. kid? Young. Okay. Four? Yeah. Four? Yeah, not five. So get the home clippers on a four-year-old. He was getting a bit of a swish-do, though. I don't know if Mum could do that at the time.

A four-year-old with a fade? A four-year-old. Well, he was getting a swish-do. Okay. He was getting the combing and everything, but he wasn't having it. Mum was trying to bribe him and I thought, you know what's going to happen here? Strangers. Oh, God.

So I turn and I look at him and I say, do you know I used to play up at the hairdressers and look what happened. My hair all fell out. And he just looked at me and his eyes got real wide and he was just like, yeah. And the mum was like, I don't think that helped. I was like, yeah, no, I don't think it's it. Maybe not. Sorry about that. Wow. You made a kid cry. I was like, yeah, no, I don't think it's it. Yeah, that wasn't. Maybe not.

Sorry about that. Wow. Maybe not. You made a kid cry. I made a kid cry. Did you use that voice? My hair fell out. Yeah, because you kind of want to, yeah, you kind of want to come across a little bit like,

I'm a little bit sick of hearing it, but a little bit like, here's a little joke for you, fella. So you're disciplining someone else's child. Yeah, but. Wow. Okay. I used to play with the hairdressers and guess what happened? It all fell out.

And now this poor kid's going to be like... Yeah. Thinking he's going to be bald. Yeah, he's going to wake up bald. You're like the guy from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. When he's standing outside the factory, he goes, nobody ever goes out. Nobody ever goes in.

And then he walks off, you know, giving sage advice to a child who wasn't asking for it. And you never see him again, do you? Never see him. He's a threatening old man. Yeah. I am the threatening old man. And so, yeah, he cried.

What a meanie. So I was wondering, this morning if we were to take some calls, when did you accidentally make somebody cry, child or otherwise? Oh, yeah, when you didn't mean to. You didn't mean to. Maybe you're trying a joke or you say something and you don't know what's happening in their life right now. A friend of mine showed me a photo of her as a kid once

and I utterly lost it. I just laughed and laughed and laughed and then she was sort of like, and then I laughed too long and she got upset. She was like, that's really mean. And was crying. What was funny about it? Was she an ugly child? Yeah,

just sort of... It was before she realised that she had a um, what's this thing? Thyroid. Thyroid issue. And so she was suffering greatly. And it was just so funny to see it. I know, it was bad. I shouldn't have

laughed, but it was truly a funny photo. It was like from the 80s initially. It was all blurry. Oh, 80s. I'm picturing like, okay. I shouldn't have laughed, but it was truly a funny photo. It was from the 80s initially. It was all blurry. Oh, 80s. I'm picturing like, okay. And it would have been a funny jersey. A jersey. A knitted jersey.

I just started crying. Oh, it morphed into a cry. Well, maybe you accidentally insulted somebody. Yeah. Maybe you were trying a joke. When did you make somebody cry? Accidentally. In public.

A stranger. Or a friend. Vaughn made a four-year-old cry yesterday. He's a mean man. That mean man made me cry. Yeah. You told him if he didn't behave, his hair would fall out. Barber's in... He just wasn't having a good time. It wasn't being

the worst kind of behaviour I've ever seen, but it was just, you know. So I just thought it'd help. You'd lighten the mood with a joke. With a joke. I used to misbehave with the hairdressers too, and look what happened. My hair fell out.

I mean, maybe genetically he was going to be bald anyway. Maybe he's got bald men all through his family. Well, maybe you've, yeah, kicked off some lifelong trauma. Yeah. We want to know when you've accidentally made someone cry. Maybe. Unintentionally offended someone. Wow, some amazing text messages. I was interviewing for a new admin person at work and I asked this lady about what interested her about the role

and she just started crying. It was really awkward and it was really hard not to laugh and I still don't know what made her cry. Pretty the stress of the question, maybe. Yeah, wow. Just got like a... Simplify the question. You want to know that a little bit too much.

Gina, when did you accidentally make somebody cry? Well, I was down in Beach Hop, where you drive around and around the roundabout. It's quite naff, really, but it's fun. And all the little kids hold up signs saying, can I come for a ride? So we pulled over, and this little kid hopped in. He must have been about seven or eight.

And you'll realize that I'm not a parent at the end of this story. Right. So he's in the car. He's really excited. And then all of a sudden it hits him that he's with total strangers and he's not with his parents. And so he says, you will take me back, won't you? And me being the childless one said as a joke, now we're going to keep you, you know?

And he started crying. And I'm like, I'm joking, I'm joking. We'll take you back. And yeah, it wasn't good. Now we're going to keep you. You do laps at Beach Hop, right? And people just stand around and watch the cars. It's all classic cars and stuff.

So you've got a nice classic car and he wanted a ride. Correct, yeah. But still weird that kids are out there being like, can I have a go for a ride without mum and dad. Stranger Dane, really? Yeah, yeah. And Gina sounds like a psycho. Don't I, Jess?

Don't I, Jess? I totally agree. I've never done it since. Did you calm his nerves with a Woodstock bourbon and a cigarette? 100%. Yeah, there you go. You want a durstock bourbon and a cigarette? 100%. Yeah, there you go. You want a durry laugh? Calm down, calm down, you bloody wimp.

Here, have a durry. Gina, thank you for your call. Some messages in. So many. I know. I'm a police officer. I make people cry all the time when I pull them over. It's not because I give them tickets.

It's just like a mum telling off instead. But as soon as you pull them over, they just start crying. Is it because they think that'll get them off a ticket? Like, would you put... No, I don't cry. Because you're a trained actor. You could easily cry. I turn it on. You could definitely turn it on. You know what I mean? Ma'am, you were going 90 in a 50.

I would want to go 90 in your 50. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You were supposed to cry, not... Oh, sorry. Sexually harass them. Sorry, I'll try again. Let's try that again. Ma'am, you were going 90 in, not sexually harass them. Sorry, I'll try again. Let's try that again. Ma'am, you were going 90 in a 50. How was I now?

Why are you taking your pants off? Oh, I can't do it. I can't do it. She's got a different sort of reflex to being in trouble. Is it the uniform? Is it the uniform? It's the arms. Yeah.

Especially when they bowl down to the pole. And when they've got tats down them. Oh, my God. Get it. Pop arms. Just a bit like that. Mine? Especially when they bowl down to the pole. And when they've got tats down them. Oh my god! Pop arms. My mum congratulated somebody in the warehouse for being pregnant and then spent the next 20 minutes trying to console them. It was the worst trip to the warehouse ever.

Were they pregnant? I'm assuming not. Don't ever die. No, no, no. They definitely were. My grandma was joking around when I was pregnant saying I'm assuming not. Don't ever die. No, no, no, no, they definitely would. My grandma was joking around when I was pregnant saying I should give my daughter her name as her middle name and I'd already planned on naming her and then told grandma jokingly back oh well, if you'd just shut up about it, you would've

had a nice surprise as I've already picked that name for her. Grandma started apologising no, grandma started crying uncontrollably and I was apologising but everybody was crying, and I felt like a big piece of crap. Oh, no. But she was probably crying because she was, like, overwhelmed, right? That's such a lovely thing for you to do to her.

I was five and a thumb sucker. My neighbour's grandad did what Vaughan did. He showed me his amputated thumb and said, I used to be a thumb sucker, and look what happened. I screamed and ran home and didn't suck my thumb again. It worked. It worked. Yes, it works.

It worked. It worked up., it works. It worked. It worked up. Still traumatised now, though. Yeah, trauma lives with you. Met some of my husband's friends at the darts where, you know, you dress up, go to the darts. What? It's like the sevens.

You dress up and you go watch British dudes play darts. Why? Because it's fun. I don't know. People do it. The darts is fun. Yeah. Okay. And I was like, fun. I don't know. People do it. Is it? The darts is fun. Is it? Yeah. Okay.

And I was like hey, this is pretty funny. You're dressed as a pumpkin. Let's crack up. And he said no, it's a carrot costume. But it was just funny. I later found out he was very He was very

very upset about it. Hey, remember how you just gave that Uber driver five stars because you wanted five stars back? Yes. Let's do that with this podcast. Oh, yeah. Review it five stars, tell your friends, and we'll do the same for you if you ever need a review for anything.

But where are you giving me my five stars? Well, I don't know. Do you own a restaurant or something? Yes. If you give us five stars on this podcast, tell us where you would like your review

and we'll review. We won't even go. We'll just review your thing. I don't want people to know where my restaurant is. I'm doing one of those secret restaurants. Oh, I was going to say

because that's exactly the opposite of how restaurants work.