ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 15th February 2023

Episode Date: February 14, 2023

Silly Little Poll!Top 6: Confectionery Heists  What did your Grandparents teach you?  Hayley & Eating in Bed  When did you take Criticism badly?Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Start your day with a great tasting McCafe coffee made just the way you like it. Guys, I need help. I've utterly stuffed my Instagram Reels algorithm.

I literally just opened it in preparation to talk about this. John 3, 16, talking about training up your child to know their biblical verses. Because what? Hayley finds Psalm talk hilarious and likes to send preachers and stuff doing the weirdest things.

Can we preface? Everyone is entitled to their own religion. And if you follow Christianity or any kind of God religion, good for you. I don't. And if you follow Christianity or any kind of God religion, good for you. I don't. And I find the earnestness of it rather entertaining.

You find the... Here's one. I am delivered! This is what I was about to play for you. Yes, play this one. If you can give me some sound here. Here's a man. He was once a homosexual.

I'm not gay no more. I am delivered. I don'm not gay no more. I am delivered. I don't like men no more. I thought I liked women. Women, women, women, women. Women, women, women. I said women. I'm not gay.

I'm not gay no more. I am delivered. I'm delivered. Have you seen there's a guy who's a death metal drummer And he put like a big death metal drop behind Oh my god Anyway so I have been sending them to YouTube Endlessly

Yes you do And now yesterday I just went on for an innocent scroll And it is all Christian content Well then you know what that'll teach you that'll teach you i just tried to refresh it it is a woman singing a testimony to god i can't i can't get it i can't get rid of it the next one is two kids saying bless the lord and singing a worship song to the lord you You've absolutely cooked your algorithm. I don't know how to get out of this. Can you uncook your algorithm?

It'd be good if you could have a reset of your algorithm. Yeah. That would be nice. Here's one. This one makes my heart explode. This baby knows God knows God. Here's her prayers. This wrecked me. Children that intercede. It's a child. You get the power of Christ moving through her. She's absolutely

feeling her. Well, you've pissed off the Lord, and so it's your fault. Well, you're singing, and then this happened. Everyone's got their hands up in the air. It's just church. The thing is, I was enjoying the funny ones, and now I've got very earnest Christian content. Maybe you need to search for, like, hole filling or, you know. Hole filling?

Jesus. I mean, you go from one end of the biblical spectrum to the other. No, you know when they fill like, you just watch plasterers and they fill holes? Oh, yeah. Yeah, or like rug cleaning. Oh, my God, rug cleaning. Although sometimes the rugs never end up that clean. But they're so dirty.

Because they don't pre-warn you that it was a really old rug. Yeah. They're like, this rug's dirty. And you're like, oh, this is going to come out looking nut, but it's all faded and such. Oh, Google, like, water blasting driveways. Yeah you're like, oh, this is going to come out looking nut, but it's all faded and such. Oh, Google water blasting driveways. Yeah, that's a good one. That's a good sign. And then you'll get onto those stuff,

and it'll give you the less of the Christian TikTokers. So I just need to watch more content that's not Christian-based. Yeah. And it will reset. But the problem is there'll always be a little bit of Christian in there, and you'll stop, and you'll laugh, and then you'll send it to us and it'll re-screw the algorithm. I know because I don't want to miss out on my favourite clips.

For example, I am delivered. I don't like the men's no more. I like women, women, women, women, women. It's only the guys that go on about that they don't like men. Sort of an over compensation sort of thing. Overcompensation, yeah.

I'd say he was utterly strutting across that stage there, wasn't he? Yeah, he was absolutely peacocking with an orange bow tie. Thank you, Sam. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleets, Fawn and Hayley. Morning. Wazzup! Wazzup! I don't know if we need that. Morning. Whazzup! Whazzup!

I don't know if we need that. It's Whazzup Wednesday. Is it? Ring, ring. Every Wednesday I get a whazzup. Ring, ring. Okay. Ring, ring. Whazzup!

Whazzup! Whazzup! Whazzup! Ring, ring. Hold on, Fletch is wiggling his chin. Can I go back to bed? Ring, ring. I'm not answering.

I'm not answering. Ring, ring. Ring, ring. I'm not answering. I'm not answering. Ring, ring. Ring, ring. I'm not answering. You better answer that. Ring, ring. Hello, you've reached the voicemail of Carl Fletcher. Please leave a message and I'll ring you back.

Beep. Whazzup! Whazzup! I'm not clearing that voice message. Ring, ring. Wow. Ring, ring. We're ringing again.

Oh my God, hello. Ring, ring. Whazzup! Whazzup! Ring, Carwin. Ring, ring, ring, we're ringing again. Oh, my God, hello. Who is it? Ring, Carwen. Ring, ring. Carwen. Who is it?

Oh, my God. Okay. One of the best movies of all time. Sorely robbed at the Oscars. I cannot believe it that they didn't get an Oscar for best comedy, for best horror. Best horror comedy. Best director. Best movie of the year.

Best lead actor. Best costume. You name it. Well, I don't know. Neither do I. It's crazy times, isn't it? Thanks for joining us for today's three-minute show. Have a great day.

What else can you do but was up in times like this? I know. I've just been scouring the news and the footage of the floods. There's shit news out there. It's so horrible. It's absolutely terrible. It's toast, my dudes. So, yeah.

Take care out there this morning. You've also forgot your wife's birthday. No, I haven't forgot my wife's birthday. I just haven't got her anything for her birthday. So now we're on Google. I bought myself something for my birthday, So now we're on Google. I bought myself something for my birthday which is in five days time.

I'm going to start sending you some links because I feel like Sade and I we like similar things. Get her an Anini Bing hoodie or whatever she likes. No, no, no.

I saw a girl the other day walk past me with an Anini Bing hoodie and I was like how much did that cost? I know. So much money. I've just sent a link for a Frank Green drink bottle to a different Vaughan.

He'll love that. Does she have a drink bottle? She needs a new drink bottle. Well, there you go. There's an Anine Bing drink bottle for $135. What? For a drink bottle? This woman.

She'll love this. Anine Bing a piss. Who is Anine Bing? Who is Anine Bing? Who is Anine Bing? She's an American lady. Is she? She has taken the piss. Is she rich as all hell?

Yeah, hell yeah. And she's cool, man. Is she? Yeah, I follow the Anine Bing on the gram. Right. What about this Los Angeles Anine Bing tan cap? I can see the wife in that. She wouldn't wear it enough.

And how much does that cost? It's only $120. Only wouldn't wear it enough. How much does that cost? It's only $120. Only $100 for a cat? $100 for a cat. Just get her a Kmart drink bottle. They leak. Big claim there. I'm sorry.

What about the Frank Greens everybody talks about? And then I'll also get her one of those $3 plumbing fittings so she can use her. Oh, don't do that in this day and age. There's a lot of plumbing issues around. There's a hell of a lot of plumbing issues. They won't even be taking someone's adapters

in this store. Mother Earth needs a good re-plumbing. Oh, God, Vaughn, let's go shopping after work. Do we all go shopping after work? I really don't want to. Coming up on the show,

silly little poll. Would you rather be on washing or drying when it comes to the dishes? It's easy. We talked recently about the foam, leaving the foam on dishes. Feral behaviour. Feral behaviour.

Strip dry or towel it. That's coming up. The top six as well. There's been a confectionery heist in the UK. 200,000 cream eggs. I can't believe that there's that many zeros. I know. But 200,000 cream eggs have been heisted.

You'd need a forklift. Yeah, they'd be heavy. It would all add up. They'd be heavy, yeah. You'd need more than a forklift, I think. You'd heisted. You'd need a forklift. Yeah, they'd be heavy. It would all add up. They'd be heavy, yeah. You'd need more than a forklift, I think. You'd need trucks. You would need trucks. I'll work out the exact weight of 200,000 cream eggs.

Yes, good, good, good. Not including packaging. But I've got the top six other historical confectionery heists. All right, guys, coming up on the show. Next on the show, though, you're a gamer, Vaughn. I am. When you play against gamers, you're a game of one. I game. When you play against gamers, everyone's got an avatar, right?

Yes. Or you see them in the game. Correct. What's your avatar? It changes a lot. Is it always a man? Nope. Is it female or male?

Sometimes I go female. It's just what looks cooler. This is an interesting stat. How many men play video games as females? Fulfilling a fantasy perhaps. Sometimes, well I just think

most of the gaming I've been doing lately has been Fortnite. Not that I've been playing much that lately either but it's sometimes their costumes are cooler. Sometimes it's just cooler. What, a little bra and hot pants? A little. Alright. What, a little bra and hot pants? A little. Alright.

What's next? ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Some stats have come out. A study's been done about online gamers and their habits and their avatar. I thought this was

especially interesting. 60% of men play as female characters. So if you're playing against a character and the avatar is female or... Female. Female adjacent. You know, sometimes the avatars are like, I don't know, like aliens or... Or like an animal monster thing

Yeah an animal monster thing But they've got But they've got a female Double D chest Yeah yeah It's Hot It's a guy

It's quite Like a monster With like an itty bitty waist Yeah yeah Six foot tall Yes Double D Hot

What did you say I didn't quite catch that last So it's like a monster Yeah Real leggy. Yeah. Like monster face. Tiny little waist.

Double Ds. Yeah. You got a name? Cassandra. Weird name for a monster. Cassandra the wolf. It's more likely to be. Cassandra the wolf.

This is the most mixed up character I've ever heard. She's an alien. She's an alien. Wolf alien. Wolf alien. She's a wolf alien. She's a wolf alien. She's a wolf alien. What are you not understanding

about what I'm saying? Yeah, exactly. Does she struggle running? She does, but she's got like a leather corset that really like straps them into place. Good, okay. Well, so 60% of female avatars.

She's got a high armour class too. Oh yeah. That little itty bitty leather bikini. Does it? I'll tell you what. Holding in those monster wolf jugs. Do they stop arrows? Oh, you betcha.

Oh, do they? What about lasers? Space lasers. It can stop anything. It's by the power of the moon. Right, okay. Older men are more likely to be playing female characters as well. Okay, well, am I an older man?

Because I don't even really think about it. I'm just like, wow, that's a cool new avatar you've unlocked. Play a bit of that. Right. Right. Jared, producer, Jared's a big gamer as well. What do you play? Is it a bit of that. Right. Right. Jared, producer Jared's a big gamer as well. What do you play?

Is it a female or a male avatar? I don't have a preference. I just pick the cooler one. Like I'm more likely to pick a cool knight over a random dude. Can ladies be knights?

Yeah, of course. Of course. Can we? It's 2023. Yeah. You can be anything you want. Yeah, you can. Oh my God.

My whole world just opened up It's 2023. Yeah. You can be anything you want. Yeah, you can. Oh, my God. My whole world just opened up. Screw radio. Yeah. I'm going to be a knight. Do you find this when you're playing against characters, would most of the females be guys? Yeah, I'd say a high percentage. Like, one of my mates, when he picks his, like, avatars,

he'll pick a female character. But that's more because he'd prefer to look at a lady's butt than a man's butt. Oh, right, because you're behind them. Because your camera's usually behind them. Right, third-person camera. Oh, right. So he's just perving at a wolf.

Alien wolf. An alien wolf with double d's. Yeah, we never really talked about the butt. What does the butt on this alien wolf look like? Like those dimensions, you know, like the waist and the bust. The waist is small and the bust and the hips are the same. Like an hourglass. I've got a question.

Boom, boom. Go ahead. Tail? Hell, there's a tail. But it's out of the way. It's high, so you can still see the butt. Right. Yeah, because you don't want your tail clouding your butt.

If there's anyone who listens to the show that is in any way able to draw, could we please have a character? Cassandra the wolf. Cassandra the wolf from the planet Howl. Can the tail also fire a machine gun? It's got a laser tip. It's got a laser tip. It's got a laser tip.

You guys do not know what you're asking for. It sounds sexy. I think she's, yeah, she's all shiny. I don't think I want to delve anymore more into the study about men online playing. What is it, Rule 29 or 34 of the internet? Oh, I'm not sure. 34? Yeah, you did know.

Are you familiar with Rule 34 of the internet? No, what's that? No. That's for your own time. Yeah, fine. Okay. Don't Google on work time. You'll set off the alarms upstairs.

And I probably will. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley's. Silly Little Pole today to do with the dishes, washing or drying. We were debating whether or not we've done this before as a Silly Little Pole. I think we've done dishes related Silly Little Poles, but I can't remember if we've done specifically. You know what, it's a question for all time. So whether we've done it or not, it's still relevant. And the people are still passionate about this. You bet.

Even if you have a dishwasher, there's always stuff that you've got to hand dry, like your pots and stuff. Wooden spoons. Don't put those in the dishwasher. Oh, I do my wooden spoons. Should I not be? No, you shouldn't.

Can't remember why. They soak up too much. Yeah. And they take ages to dry. Oh, yeah. That's true, I guess. Dishes. Oh, yeah. That's true, I guess. Dishes. Washing wins.

79% of people would rather wash the dishes than dry the dishes and then turn the dishes over. Because it's easier? It's easier. And also, the drying is two parts. You've got to dry them, and then you've got to put them away. But I like drying because nothing rules more than throwing something back at the person washing and being like, that's not washed properly. That's filthy. There's a crust

on there. And if you cook like a real cheesy situation and they've got to scrub the oven dish, you're done. You're done. And I always made the rule, while I'm drying, if I catch up, I'm done. Yeah, right. If I catch up, if you're taking so long that I catch up and there's nothing on the thing, I'm done. And mum would say, Vaughan, you're not going anywhere. And I'd say, Philip's taking so long to dry the dishes. Yeah, right. If I catch up, if you're taking so long that I catch up and there's nothing on the thing, I'm done. And mum would say, Vaughan, you're not going anywhere.

And I'd say, Philip's taking so long to dry the dishes. Yeah, we just do something in the meantime. What am I supposed to do? Stand there with a finger up my arse? Don't say that to your mother. I'm not talking to her. I'm just speaking about the situation in general. Get this mood.

Whack him. Whack him. Anyway. A little shite. That was 30 years ago. Still raw. Still raw. Raw.

Well, some feedback from lovely listeners. Indeed, Julie says, fake tan girls will always choose drying. Oh, yeah. Oh, okay. White hands, tanned arms. The palm olive wash off the tan? Yeah, because if you wash your hands too much,

that's why when I get a fake tan, spray tan, I don't wash my hands for the whole time it's there. Lasts about three weeks. Yeah, you're right. You don't wash much at all, do you? No, I don't even shower. You want to make it last. Yeah.

But yeah, if you're like this in a sink for ages, it'll fade faster. It'll wash off the fake tan. I did not know. Thanks, Julie. Brittany says, dry if no gloves. I've got shit eczema skin. Wash if there are gloves.

I didn't wash dishes for like 10 years when I had terrible eczema. And Aaron would be like, oh, do you want to do the dishes? I'd be like, mmm. My fingers. Would he chuck a towel at you? Yeah, chuck a towel at me. Dry it up. Yeah. Libby says, because if trying to stack the systemic containers after you dry them,

wash them, wipe your hands clean, and then that's somebody else's problem. Yeah. Yeah. One job. One job. One job with the wash. Courtney says, what am I, poor? Dishwashers, so neither.

But your pots And your pans And your sheets She is 100% I put the pot In the dishwasher Person Yeah and just

I reckon she's Higgledy piggledy Yeah I'd like to see this Rich bitches Dishwasher And really cast judgment On how it's all stacked

Joke's on us If she sends a back photo Of her Photos of her help And her cleaner Yeah yeah Jeeves is doing it Yeah Daniel says I'm tall Oh, joke's on us if she sends back photos of her help and her cleaner. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Jeeves is doing it.

Yeah. Daniel says, I'm tall, so my back gets sore landing over washing the dishes, so I'll dry, please. Okay. Fair call. Fair call. Fair call. I hope one day, Daniel, you get to build your own kitchen and you build it to your dimensions. Yeah, ours is a little high.

A little higher kitchen. Sink and meet in two metres off the ground. Perfect. Yeah, up to everyone else's sort A little higher kitchen. You could sink a meter, two meters off the ground. Perfect. Yeah, up to everyone else's sort of collarbone. Yeah. Now reaching up into the sink and Daniel's just like, finally. I would do that just so Daniel would do his share of the dishes. Yeah, same.

If I was... Be like, fine, I'll build you a kitchen, babe. Yeah. Do the dishes and then everybody else has to have one of those little tortoise stools that boys use to learn how to do wheeze in the toilet. Yeah. Jane says, I'll wash it

because other people don't wash them properly or use enough hot water. They should be hot enough that you leave them to stand and they'll steam themselves dry. Yeah. I want to scold.

Yeah. Scold it hard. Wash them, and then rinse the bubbles off your head and then let those bad boys drip dry. None of that tea towel crap

left all over my dishes. No. If you're getting tea towel fluff on your dishes, time for a new tea towel. It sounds like you've got a really fluffy, cheap tea towel there.

Yeah. Go for 100% cotton and give those a hard, hot wash before, and then a dryer to fluff them up before you start using them. Yeah, you've got to wash

before you use. I have to wash them, says Shell, because I'm an absolute crazy person and they aren't clean unless I clean them. Lisa says, I do, because I'm an absolute crazy person and they aren't clean unless I clean them. Lisa says, I do both because I hate people in my kitchen.

F off with your nidder natter and leave me in peace to clean my kitchen. Drying is also putting away. So that's two jobs. Washing is less work. And I grew up with seven siblings. Washing is a lot quicker. Seven siblings. You'd have to do shifts.

Yeah. I'll do the first lot. So many dishes. Move it on. So many dishes. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Now, there is only one person in this room currently. No, not you.

Sorry. I'm not interested. I'm not interested. No, you are the only single gentleman in this room. Okay. Oh. Okay. Are you single currently?

Haven't taken a lover? Yes, I am currently. Like a long-term lover? I'm currently single. Right. Do you think I would not tell you? I don't think you would. I could imagine.

You'd just been like holding this relationship on the side and didn't even tell us Rude Very rude It would be so rude We want to put them through A very Tough

Vetting System Yeah definitely Definitely Definitely Make sure they're good enough For our boy Yeah

Well if And you know how your friends Gather around and help you Compose like Messages to someone Yeah yeah we'll do that Yeah we'll do that No Yeah, we'll do that. No, absolutely not.

You will not. We'll work out the best angle for a photo of your penis. Yeah, and we'll do the shoot. Are people still doing a penis picture? Yeah, we'll do the photos. Yes. As friends. Is this your tip?

Tuck the balls, tuck the balls, tuck the balls, tuck the balls. Vaughn, get in there and move his balls to the side. I'll go behind him and hook his balls from behind him, pull them back up. You tell me when. So the willy's looking good just on its own. Yeah, yeah. Let's get some, let's get a trim. Let's go down to Rodney Wayne and get this thing

trimmed up. No, we'll do it. We don't have time for that. We'll do it. Okay, you do it. Careful with the scissors. Did Rodney Wayne do that? They used to. Do they? Okay, they used to. Yeah, the ones in the mall, you just pop in there and down trowel. Right. That's what that little sink's for. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Is it? Oh, right. You park up on the over sink. I'm going to wash it first. I thought it was for shampooing. Dual purpose. Dual purpose. Yeah, shampooing.

And pubes. The pubes. Right. No, dick pics is not the tip. No, you win the whole thing in it, don't you? Well, you need something for it to be relative to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

You want to see it all. No, put a dog in your profile pic. Is that how you get the honeys? How you get all the hot fly honeys. Okay. Cassandra the wolf from Planet Howl? Would she be an okay dog to have in there? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Probably a little sexy. A little too sexy. Draw the attention away from you. The cleavage is too much. Yes, yes, yes. Don't put your dog cleavage in there. But if you have a picture of a dog in your profile pic, a cute pup, then people are two-thirds,

two-thirds of people were more likely to want to match with you because you've got a little puppy. Wow. What if you don't have a puppy? Do you just find one at the local park? No, just find a puppy. Just go down to the SPCA and get a mangled one. You know what I mean?

A mangled one. Yeah, a mangy mangled. I'm pretty sure you'd want a cute one in your photo to up the chances. No, because that makes you look like, oh my God, he rescued a dog. He's not getting a designer pup. Right. He's getting a rescue. Do you think the SPCA, I'm just trying to think if they'd be on board or not,

or any sort of dog rescue place, you could come and they had a green screen there and you paid 20 bucks. And they could change the background, have a photo with the dog, the money raised, supports the dogs. Yeah, and it's like, need a new profile pic?

Don't give away this amazing business idea for free. Oh no, I'm that sort of guy. It's a charity though. It's a charity. It's a charity. I'm going to rip this charity off though. I'm going to be in the paper for embezzling from a charity. Right.

Because we'll have poking machines there too. And that's free money. You just open them up and there's all the money there. I think you just take it out the back. It's like a laundromat. You own the machines,

you get the coins out of them. Exactly. Yeah, right. Good luck IRD. So dog owners, they say, are seen as more social, active and empathetic.

Right. Also, you've got a cute puppy. Yeah. And they want to give that puppy a scratch on the belly. Yeah. But also, I would look at it and be like, oh, well, they've got to be at least a little bit responsible because dogs are pretty high maintenance.

You've got to look after them, yeah. Yeah. So if you have a dog, at least they know that you can keep something alive. Yeah. You're not a total. If it was like a chihuahua or something. Oh, no.

Or one of those. What was that dog that won the world's ugliest dog last week? Crested. Chinese Crested something. It's like underbite. You're not going to be swiping right on that, are you? No. Oh, I just feel like my feed is inundated with golden retrievers.

There you go. Get a golden retriever. I'm trying so hard not to. I mean in your profile photo, yeah. Oh, yeah. No, no, I want one. I want one. You'll just end up dropping it off at Vaughan's

and then it'll become Vaughan's. I'll just have another dog to feed. Oh, I want one. You said yes. Could I have it as a puppy? Could I have mine as a puppy and just enjoy the puppy and then when it got big and sort of smelly, you could take it?

Yeah, as long as you train it. So I don't mind getting an adult dog if they've got good manners. You'd train it to make you Aperol Spritzes. Oh, my God, yeah. How cute would it look walking in the drinks trolley? And it's got, like, the base of the cocktail glass in its mouth. Soft bite. That's the good thing about the Retriever.

Soft bite? Soft bite. I'm going to get one. Now, I know that we made a very exciting announcement the other day that Pink was coming to New Zealand. Yes. Now, I first saw Pink in 2001 when I was 11, and it was so exciting. So the idea of seeing her again, even though she's still been going this whole time, is very exciting.

And then we were talking this morning about the Vinger Boys. They were here. They did the town hall. And I knew that they were coming. And I was like, oh, it doesn't interest me. But I walked past. People were dressed up as like sailors and like all of their costumes and it was a huge night apparently.

Yeah, I bet it was. And that kind of retro resurgence, that buzz is back. That's happening. And now one band who I am very excited about has made an announcement. We are very excited to say that we are going back out on tour in October. We're just so excited to get back out there and sing our hearts out and perform. We're celebrating 25 years, which is just crazy.

And I think in today's times, you need a bit of positivity. You need a bit of picking up. So that's what we're here to do. 100%. Now we hear multiple voices there, multiple women, multiple men. Who could it be? Get down tonight. Come on.

Yeah. Get down tonight. Come on. Yeah. Get down tonight. S on, yeah Get down tonight, come on Everybody get down tonight S Club 7 S Club S Club went from S Club 7 to S Club 5 To S Club

To three of them that were just S Club So who's involved in this reunion? The full seven The whole lot Wow All of them are back Including the, who was it who? Hannah

Hannah They all come back when the money dries out, don't they? Yes, she said that she found herself a bit homeless recently. Is that the one that was? Yeah, the blondie. Oh, right. Tina, Rachel, she's doing her thing. Joe, the one that can sing.

Hannah, Bradley, John and Paul are all coming back. And so John and Paul, Ringo and George are going to be there? Ringo's unavailable. Unfortunately. So have they announced, like, dates? Yeah. And so... Do you want to pull Ringo and George going to be there? Ringo's unavailable. Oh. Unfortunately. Yikes. So have they announced dates? So at the moment, it's UK, Ireland. Yeah.

But... Surely you'd tour. I think they're going to do more. You'd go down under. You'd have to. It would be amazing. I would go. Would you go?

In a heartbeat, I would go. Do we think it would be good, though? Well. Like, was it ever good live? Yeah, Jo was the only one that could sing. Right. The blonde female. Excuse me, as a big Rachel Tina fan,

I think they could sing, couldn't they? Horse getting down on the floor While Hannah's screaming out for more Rachel sing Wanna see Rachel do her thing Then you got Joe Okay, you'll be front row, won't you? Get ready everybody

Cause here we go This will be such a good night out It's amazing those lyrics survived your emo phase And your goth phase They were in there beforehand They were burnt in in the 90s And then they went down But at what stage did you drop S Club?

When you started going through your dark? Well, probably when they dropped. Yeah, right. You know what I mean? Yeah. Because they had that one massive album

and then their second one wasn't as good. No. And then you found Evanescence. And then I found Evanescence. But you only need one good album because they were so big

in that time. It was a real time for like British pop groups. Yeah, it was. Pop groups on a whole. Because that was like Sugar Babes, same time. Sugar Babes. Spice Girls. Yeah. In that time. It was a real time for like British pop groups. Yeah, it was. Pop groups on a whole. Because that was like Sugar Babes, same time. Sugar Babes. Spice Girls.

Yeah. Blue. It's funny looking at them all. Everyone's like, oh my God, they've aged so amazingly. I'm like. What? What is nobody saying? Just a little snip, snip, tuck, tuck.

Oh, right. There's been a few injections. A little bit. I mean, Joe's face looks so tight you could lance it like a blister right

you know yeah well if they end up touring we'll make sure we give you the details and Hayley

will be front of stage please S Club come to New Zealand play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley blah blah blah blah blah blah this is the Hello, today's top six dealing with the theft of 200,000 Cadbury cream eggs in Britain.

Yeah, so they were stolen from an industrial estate. Police were notified and started the egg hunt. What? Started an Easter egg hunt. And they found, they pulled over a guy on the motorway and found the cream eggs in the vehicle. I don't know how you get 200,000. Would that be, would that fit in a big van?

Did you figure out the weight? Stacked well. No. So the price, they were 40,000 pounds, so $80,000 of cream eggs. What was the motivation? Why the cream egg? Sweet tooth. Just hungous.

Hell of a sweet tooth. They're worth like a dollar each, a pound each, aren't they? Yeah, but where are you going to sell black market cream eggs? You know what I mean? Like, are you going to have a stall at the market? Yeah, I don't know. How much does this cream egg weigh? You unwrap them.

Yeah. Yeah. And then... Oh, you probably melt them down. Yeah. And resell them as another egg. So it would weigh eight tonne. Because they're 40 grams each.

40 times 200. And that's not including packaging and boxes. No. So, wow. Wow. That's a big load. No. So, wow. Wow. That's a big load. But they got them back.

Today's top six historical confectionery heists is what we're looking at. Okay. Number six on the list, the Haribo Hold Up in Hamburg. Yeah, I remember that. Haribo beers. I remember that. Massive, wasn't it? Yeah.

They traced the person who stole them by the insane amounts of diarrhea squirting out of them because those things will go rip right through you. Artificial sweetness. You eat too many of those little gummy bears and you will be shooting yourself. Yeah. Shooting. Number five on the list of the top six historical confectionery heists. We all remember this.

The Bounty Bar break-in in Buenos Aires. Oh, my God. Yeah. That was devastating, actually. Yeah. Hell of a time for the coconut industry. Really was. A lot of coconut.

Hell of a time for the desiccated coconut industry. Desiccated? Decimated. Desiccated. Desiccated. Desiccated. Desiccated is more what we're doing at the moment. To our planet.

Yeah. We're decimating the world. You desiccate your coconut. Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six historical confectionery heists. Do you guys remember this was two? They went in for two things. The Kit Kat and K-Bar caper of

Cape Town. Yes. Because they wanted things in sort of a long finger shape but they wanted a soft chewy toffee and a Kit Kat. Have a break at Kit Kat. They sell Kit Kats in South Africa, Kat They sell Kit Kats In South Africa Kit Kats in South Africa

Huge Oh I didn't know that Didn't you know that No I had no idea Okay Number three on the list Of the top six Historical confectionery heists

Remember the lollipop Larceny in London Yes Who could forget Who could forget that In London And they found it all In Big Ben didn't they

Yeah they did I hid them in plain sight. Yeah. Number two on the list of the top six historical confectionery heists, the Flake Five Finger Discount of Florida. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Classic. That was a classic. Five Finger Discount. Oh, my God. I forgot about that. Where'd you get that from? Five Finger Discount. Five Finger Discount.

For flakes. That's five flakes, five fingers. Love a flake. Number one on the list of the top six historical confectionery heists. Who could forget it? The great crunchy bar

train robbery from that TV commercial. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Fulham, Fulham, chuck, have a crunchy hokey pokey bar.

Crazy crunchy hokey pokey bar. I'd love to see them do that now, but they'll probably have to take a rail bus replacement. Yeah. Yeah, they would.

Well, they're working on the rails this weekend, so the crunchies will be transported by Auckland bus. Now, that's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Gabriel. Babies. Will not be called this for a while, I feel like. No.

No babies for a batch. There's going to be a Gabby Gap and baby names. That's what they call it. It moved its way down the country. As you said, Hayley, people in Whangarei in the north, the weather might not be as bad as it was, but certainly not out of the woods. No.

Completely cut off. A lot of people without power. Power, phone, internet, all the things we take for granted every day, and then it swung its way down the country. The East Cape up there, that looked, John Campbell was up there last night on the news. Oh. Atrocious. But we don't have anybody up there we can talk to this morning. But in Hawke's Bay, we've lost a whole lot of radio frequencies.

I don't know, the big tower must have fallen over or something. There was only two left, so we've let ours out for the day. We're subleasing. We're subleasing. We're subleasing. We're subleasing the frequency. Have we checked with the landlord that we're allowed to sublease? We are.

We're subleasing. Don't make a mess of the frequency, please. Adam and Megan join us from Hawke's Bay Hits. Good morning, guys. Good morning. Good morning. Don't be surprised if you have no listeners after this, but we're doing our best.

Are you hijacking? You're going to take this from us? Are you sabotaging? Is this sabotage? It was all part of the plan, guys. We've never been so popular. Now, a lot of people have friends and family that live in Napier Hastings

and they just cannot contact them. Yeah, and this is the really traumatic part for people. You know, no one can get in touch with anybody. We can't get in touch with anybody. We're trying to get official communications out from people that know stuff. No one knows anything. So that, I think, has just made it really, really difficult and just incredibly worrying for so many people here.

What's the weather like now, today? We've actually got pretty lucky this morning, woken up to what could only be described as a reasonable Hawke's Bay day. No wind at all, and the sun is shining through small parts of blue sky. It's mainly, it's on the ground where the issues really lie. The rivers are still massively flooded. We've had urgent evacuations happening in some suburbs just this morning as the river keeps pushing through its banks.

And, you know, the stop banks have done a wonderful job, but in some places it was just too much. And so we do have suburbs underwater. Yeah, that's the thing, isn't it? It's like as soon as the weather clears, it's not over. No, it's not over, but at least you're not fighting that as well. You know, this is when people can get out and kind of rescue efforts are a little easier.

Yeah, that's right. And the rescue efforts have been, you know, amazing. We've had Defence Force, of course, coming in and rescuing people. You will have seen the images from rooftops and things like that. My own mother-in-law had to be rescued, you know, by a boat. She was standing out on her porch and it was up to her neck. And, you know, and that's just so incredibly stressful as you can imagine. So, yeah. And then, of course, it was Valentine's Day. So we just had dinner by candlelight, which was not the kind of Valentine's candlelight we wanted.

Sort of unintentionally romantic. So what kind of things did you guys see on your drive to work this morning? This morning, things are actually reasonable. We're both reasonably central in Napier. So the surface flooding on roads has disappeared. A lot of the trees that are down the crossroads have been cut down. I mean, just citizens of Hawke's Bay have been getting out and getting stuck in on their own.

There's chainsaws popping up everywhere. You never know how many people have a chainsaw in the back of their car. And one's got three. People with a chainsaw love an many people have a chainsaw in the back of their car. People with a chainsaw love an excuse to use a chainsaw in public. I say don't wait for an emergency. If you see a tree that kind of looks like a little wonky, get out there and put it down. There could be a power line entangled in there.

Common sense. Have you had any word on communications? Are they obviously saying it might be a while before we get, like... Still no official word. Like, the cell towers are down. So I know that they are trying to get satellites in here. But, of course, that's a bit of an issue as well.

So they're trying their best, but we don't know. And the electricity's the other big one. I mean, it's a frightening prospect to have your freezer, your fridge off. It's coming up 24 hours now for people. And the official word is days or weeks so no one really has a set time as to how long we're going to be without power.

I remember hearing this, if you lose power and it's not your choice or it happens, you can claim everything that's in your freezer You can claim insurance, you can, yeah. That's why we love you guys, that's great information. But also, how long can you keep your freezer shut if you don't open it? Will it say, oh, not too long?

Oh, no, like a day. Like a day. But that's if you don't have kids in the house. You know, if you tell a kid not to open a fridge or a freezer, what are they going to go and do? They open that fridge or freezer 56 times. Of course they do. Well, they were hoping food was going to magically appear, Mum.

So what are you guys doing today? I mean, obviously you have to address this and help keep people informed, but also keeping people's spirits up, I guess? Yeah, there's a little bit of that. You know, we've been really lucky. We have lots of great texts and things coming through. We've been able to talk to a lot of people. We were on air for, you know, 10 hours yesterday,

so I imagine it'll be similar today. And we're just hunkering down in here because there's power in the studio, so we probably won't leave here for weeks. Wow. Wow. Wow. Well, thank you for keeping us updated this morning. No worries, guys. And stay safe.

Adam and Megan are from the hits in Hawke's Bay. Using our frequency. We have granted permission. With sub-lease, sub-lease. Yeah, sub-late. We'll send the bill. Just vacuum it before you bring it back. That would be my only thing.

Yeah, give it a clean. Leave it there that you found it. Yeah, that's it. It's like borrowing a chainsaw you know yeah fill it up fill it up bring it back

clean it out sharpen the blade play ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley yeah yeah oh yeah yeah yeah so

the queen the queen has returned yes she hath returned what did you just tell us she's 34 years old

and it's her first live performance at Super Bowl. This is Rihanna. She's 34? In seven years. So last time she performed she was in her mid-twenties. I'm 34 this year. Do you have a billion? She's so much hotter than me. Are you a billionaire as well?

She's keeping it so tight. I don't think she'll ever tour again, right? Like Super Bowl or one-off special performances for Saudi Arabian princes will be the only thing She's keeping it so tight Yeah She I don't think she'll ever tour again Right like Superbowl Or one off special performances For Saudi Arabian princes Will be the only thing she does Right Why would you

Like It's her birthday I forgot We're birthday twins That's right you are too Rihanna and I It's her birthday in five days Yeah

So she She doesn't get paid for the Superbowl Whenever you perform for the Superbowl No matter how big you are It's free It's free Which is Really mind blowing Every time the Super Bowl. Whenever you perform for the Super Bowl, no matter how big you are... It's free. It's free. Which is really mind-blowing

every time the Super Bowl happens. And people are like, what? What? Because it's such a huge show, but they go... I mean, when they didn't pay Maroon 5, fair enough. Are you kidding me? That's top of my list.

His hair's taken its toll on me. She said goodbye. Beautiful. Guys, we're nailing things back. Too many times before. Beautiful. Stunning full points. Pay them for the Super Bowl.

Pay them what you want. Anyway, so they don't get money for it because the Super Bowl goes, this is the biggest show in the world. This is the amount of billion people watching it across the world. And every time you perform at the Super Bowl, you get heaps of money through your other revenues. So you get huge spikes in your streaming, record

sales, tour sales if you're going to be touring. For Rihanna, for example, this song, Be Better Have My Money, it went up 2,600%. 2,600% streaming.

Good song. I've got some other stats. Streaming overall though went up like Overall streaming was up 640%. Wow. But there's some huge songs. So this one 2,600. Diamonds shot up 1,400. Rude Boy streaming increased

1,170%. Great Valentine's Day song too, Rude Boy. So with streaming what should pretty get $400 for that? So probably, I think like around $300. Yeah. So like that's like a good week's groceries. Yeah. There's a launch metrics.

You know Brad Olsen would go Bad News Brad. Oh, Bad News Brad would love this. We saw Bad News Brad yesterday. We ran into him at, Brad. Oh, bad news, Brad would love this. We saw bad news, Brad. Yesterday we ran into him at our breakfast. We had a little breakfast after the show. Did you pass on our regards? Uh-huh, we didn't. Always pass on our regards.

No, I didn't. He would have been proud of me, though, because I wasn't spending money on breakfast. Yeah, I know. We felt guilty because he caught us spending money on breakfast. But do you know what he did tell us on Valentine's Day? What did he say? Taxis.

Yeah, he said flowers and jewellery obviously get a huge spike in sales, but also taxis. Which we were trying to figure out why. Which I'm assuming would come under Uber as well. I guess people just taxiing to dates. That's weird. Taxiing, they both drink. Or taxiing someone late to your house because it was a bad Valentine's Day and you've just got to get some joy out of it.

Yeah, taxiing away. So some stats, Launch Metrics is like Brad Olsen's company but in America they look into this sort of thing and they work out the media impact value.

Yeah. This is like how much a brand gets out of certain exposure in different media. Yeah. Like being in a movie or something.

Yes. Because I'll just say I've got some new Fenty knickers that I just purchased after that. Did you get the ones with the hole?

Yes. What are they called? The garters attached to it? They're so hot. So Google searches for her products, Fenty, her brand. And is it Savage Fenty, her lingerie? Her lingerie. Went up 833% on Google.

Wow. For searches. So she wasn't paid. Apple Music apparently paid $250 million for the rights for the Super Bowl halftime show, which went straight to the NFL and Super Bowl. But they think the fact that her backup dancers were wearing Savage Fenty had an impact

of $2.6 million of media impact value. Yeah, because they looked so cool. They looked rad. And the product placement for her beauty, which was on- screen bugger all. She like put a bit of, she would like. Powder on. Powdered herself up.

They think that was $5.6 million of additional media impact value. Yeah. So it's huge. And the other thing is it's like for Rihanna, like not that she's irrelevant, but she hasn't made a lot of music. No. She's only released one song in the last however many years. Yeah.

And now it's just this little boost as well to be like, she's back. So when they say... Now people are going, where's your album? Yeah, I know. They don't know how much of their own money she spent on this, on the halftime show either. But surely the Super Bowl paid for... They're given a $15 million budget to spend on production costs.

That includes everything that they have to pay for. And when The Weeknd did the halftime show, he spent $7 million of his own money. Yeah, I don't think that would cover it. Did you see the amount of dancers? As you were saying, Vaughn, it's like, there's the dancers, zoom out more, more, more, more, more. Every time you changed the angle, there was more.

And those floaty stages and everything. I mean, $15 million wouldn't go far in that scale of things. Yeah. I mean, we'll never know her sales, will we? Her Fenty sales and makeup sales. Probably not. But they'll have a good year. I think they'll have a good year.

You'll probably know, won't you? Maybe at the end of the year. Is it a publicly listed company? Oh, yeah, true. I don't know. I don't know if it is. I mean, either way, when they're doing it for free, they're cashing in. So don't feel bad.

Don't feel bad they're not getting paid because they are getting paid. Play ZM's Fletch Vornanalee. Play ZM. The University of

Mississippi. M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-P-I. You put three P's there. Why'd you go P-P-P-I? I did P-P-I. M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-I. M-I-S-S-I-M-S-S-S-I-M-S-S-S-I-M-S-P-P-I. You put three P's there. Why did you go P-P-P-I? I did P-P-I. M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-I. Mrs. M, Mrs. I, Mrs. S-S-I, Mrs. S-S-I, Mrs. P-P-I.

See? No, you're thinking of Matilda. Mrs. M, Mrs. M, Mrs. F, Mrs. Y, Mrs. C, Mrs. D, Mrs. I, Mrs. F, F, Y, Mrs. C, Mrs. U, Mrs. L, T, Y. Difficulty. Anyway, the University of Mississippi conducted a study looking at the effects of a breakup. Okay. And what they found.

Oh, this is harsh after Valentine's Day. Isn't today the day that the breakup's happening? Yeah, because you can't dump on Valentine's Day, so you wait for the day after and then be like, jokes. Or the day before to save the present. Money saving. Money saving. Cost of living and everything. and then be like, jokes. Or the day before to save the present. Money saving. Money saving. Cost of living and everything.

Especially in this time, yeah. So they looked at the effect of a breakup, reflecting on past relationships, feelings of belonging, self-esteem, meaningful existence. Asked them about all these feelings. And what they found was that if you have been ghosted... What about that funny feeling you get in your tummy when you go over a bump on the road what about funny oh you mean when the car lifts

off the ground yeah yeah similar to that right or when you're gonna or you're gonna swing for the first time in ages and you're like i went on a swing the other day i went for a walk and there's a swing at the rugby club by my house and i was like I'll sit and have a little swing. It was good fun. Yeah. Quite dangerous though. Well you can't go too high. Yeah. I've broken my arm on a swing when I fall backwards. Anyway so what they found was that all these feelings of not feeling

meaningful and not feeling satisfied and da da da da were amplified if the person had been ghosted rather than if they had had a sort of communic communicative breakup and then they found that at least 60 percent of people have been ghosted in their life at least once i've been ghosted well so technically you're just dating someone and then they just disappear and then they just stop talking to you no more talking no more texts you say hey what's up nothing hey

how are you nothing and then you're oh, you're looking at the text history. You're like, this is a one-sided conversation. Yeah. Yeah. I was seeing a boy in Wellington and he was a DJ at a techno club. Well, can I just stop you right there? Can I stop you there?

I'm already getting a couple of red flags. Yeah, see, I hadn't seen them at this point. Oh, no, how do you sprawl? I know. What club was he at? I'm already getting a couple of red flags. A couple of warning signs. I hadn't seen them at this point. Oh, no, the Hattie Sproul. I know. What club was he at? It was a bar called Sandwiches.

Now, Wellington people will remember this bar. Did it have sandwiches? No, it was a drum and bass club. Wait, okay, so he's a DJ at a bar that promises sandwiches that has no sandwiches and they play drum and bass music. Yeah. Sandwiches with no sandwiches. Okay, carry on. Three red flags. So we were seeing each other and he didn't have

a car. Fourth red flag. How did he get it? I don't have a car. He transported his crate of records around. Yeah, I know. Well, I guess he relied on people like myself. Fifth red flag. Yeah. So one morning he was playing late and this was before the, you know,

3 a.m. close thing. They'd play to all hours in the morning. Sixth red flag. And then he was said that he'd be finished about 5 a.m. in the morning. I was like, you know what? I'll come pick you up. Oh, wow. And then I got in my car at 5 a.m. in the morning.

This is before 5 a.m. existed to me. And I got in my car and I started driving around. I was like, hey, just let me know. Like I'm kind of hanging around the Courtney Place area. Let me know when you're done. Nothing, nothing, nothing. And just never heard from him again. Ever?

Ever. So I was driving around trying to pick up this DJ from outside a club at 5 a.m. on a Sunday morning. This guy's got more flags than the UN. He does. Oh, sweet, Hayley Sproul. How old were you? Oh, I know. This was literally just before I met Aaron because he was my

lover at my 21st birthday. And then I met Aaron when I was 21 later that year. Wow. You've done better. You've done better, yeah. I've upgraded. He's a man with a lot of green flags so still to this day have you ever seen him pop up anywhere do you know i saw him a few years ago at a train station and he was in a fight with who i don't know some other person oh not like a fight with like not like a yelly screamy fight with a partner like a physical

punch up in the heart. And I was like, I said to my best friend, I was like, oh my God, do you know who that is? She was like, hold me, shine. Had somebody been waiting for the train bad mouthed Drum and Bass? Drum and Bass, maybe. Like, Drum and Bass is dead. And he was like, just let me put down my milk crate of records. Yeah.

And I'm like, I'm going to kick your ass. But yeah, that was my only time I got ghosted, but I think it was for the better. I wasn't too cut up about it. Yeah, so it's the way you look at it. Just move on. I don't know because at 21, gas was precious to me. I didn't have a lot of money. God, it was probably a dollar 20 a litre.

He was thinking that you were out. Had you been home and he knew? Yeah, no, but he knew you'd been home or he thought you were just... No, he knew I was home. He knew that I wasn't out that night. I had just offered. And he said, yes, I'd love a ride home.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. Now, have we got time to go through all the people you've ghosted, Fletch? 23 minutes to eight. No, we don't. We're out of time. I mean, it's already February. We need the rest of the year.

It's slanderous. There's a granny on TikTok dealing out some life advice. Just little handy tips. Some of them super... I didn't know this one about the floors. Listen to this. This is if you've got a dent in your hardwood floor. If you've got hardwood floors,

boiling water and you drip a little boiling water into the dents and you leave them. The idea is that the wood soaks up the water and expands slightly. But if they are hardwood floors, you must put vinegar in with the water or you'll end up with black dents, which will affect your security deposit even more.

I've got my granny. Granny's so helpful. Who knew? What a good lifetime security deposit even more. I've got my granny. That's so helpful. Who knew? What a good lifetime of advice in there. I've got hardwood floors. And a hardwood bench. Well, I got told with the hardwood bench that I should take an eye into it.

Same thing, I guess it fills with steam maybe and it'll pop it out. The heat expands the wood? Yeah. Expands it. Great little tips. She's got the TikTok. And so she's gone crazy on TikTok.

You know, these are the tips that you always see like tip top. And so she's gone crazy on TikTok. These are, you know, these are the tips that you always see like bundled up into a video of like five house hacks. Yeah. Except she's delivering it with that posh

British accent. Oh, I know. I love that. Yeah. Feel a little bit more. It's also stuff that you just go like, grannies know this stuff

and like mums know this stuff and always like, at what point do you know this? Because they didn't have the internet. So they just got taught it.

When we trot tar on brand new bathroom tiles and we're like, how what point do you know this? Because they didn't have the internet. So they just got taught it. So they couldn't be like, when we trod tar on brand new bathroom tiles and we're like, how do we get this off? Internet. Internet. And it was margarine. Like that time you spilled that hot candle all over my carpet. Yeah, because I walked in and I said, what's the smell? I picked it up and it had just been blown out and it just went slosh.

Sloppity-doppity. Do you know how to get candle wax out of a carpet? You let it dry and you shave it off. No. You put a paper towel over top of it and then you iron it. And it melts the wax and it soaks it up. It soaks it into the paper towel. So you'll probably go through a whole roll of paper towels.

Wow, and it works. 100%. No wax in the carpet at all. I love these things. Before the internet, what you would have had to ring Nan or Granny or Mum and be like, Mam, Gran. Granny, Granny, Granny.

How do we get this stain out? It's always stains, like dings. And grandparents always have the better stuff from the older times. Yeah. The better hacks,

the better tricks. And that was what I was wondering we could talk about this morning is what did your grandparents teach you? Oh, this will be nice. This will be wholesome. This will be nice

on a day like this. Yeah. My granddad taught me how to march. He was a marching coach in the 70s. And my mum marched for him. So my granddad taught my mum how to march. And then my mum coached. And then I was like, I want to march.

And she sent me up to Dargaville. And my pop got his little tape player and plugged it into the church and put that out the window in the church car park. Taught me how to march. And now look at you. I travelled the world with it. You marched. If you go to his house, well, not anymore.

He's passed. But if you went to his house, it was like a marching shrine. Wow. All set in the Dargaville Methodist Church car park. They do a good car park, the Methodists? The lines I tell you what. They're not afraid to go a good straight line in a Methodist car park. And you need that when park, the Methodists. The lines I tell you what. They're not afraid to go a good straight line in a Methodist car park.

And you need that when you're learning how to march. You would have learned a bit on the farm from your grandad. Lots. Yeah. Well, both of my grandads were very practical men. Yeah. Learned to drive at the tender age of six. Yes, my grandad taught me how to drive a manual. Yep. But were you six?

No. Farm kids just always learn to drive. But you're allowed to? Because they had to feed the hay off the back of the ute, so he'd point it in the right direction and pull the throttle out, and you'd just have to steer, and then he's like, go up a gear, and you pump that in and crank that down. Amazing. Yeah, I remember driving real young.

How to use a chainsaw. At six? Probably eight. Lots of you just kind of how to pretty grim, but how to kill a chicken. Like we used to do the home kill of the chickens. They're eating chickens. Wow. And our job was to chase them and catch them when they had no heads.

When they go squirty squirty with the blood. And you'd finish at the end of the day, you'd walk inside all looking like Patrick. Was it Patrick Bateman? Oh my God. The Christian Bale character. Do they still do that on like Survivor and Celebrity Treasure Island? They have to kill a chicken and eat it? Or is that frowned upon?

I think it's frowned upon now. Yeah. I don't think they do that. Right. But they did, though. Yeah. Honestly, Maddie McLean passed out chopping her head off a chicken. Yeah, same.

What did your grandparents teach you, Fletch? They're dead, aren't they? Yeah, but when they were alive. My granddad was not the ghost of my granddad teaching me to drive. I know, because one of mine died quite young, and then the other one I didn't just, yeah, nah. Not much. I can't remember, not much.

Is that why you're useless? Well, now you've got a TikTok granny. Yeah, that's why I'm useless. That's why I'm useless. Yeah, you're the TikTok granny. You are a bit useless, aren't you? We want to take some calls now. 0800 dials at M9696.

Text us in. What are those like skills or little tips that you learned from your grandparents? Yeah. Yeah, let's learn. How to get a stain out of a shag pile. Exactly. Someone might be listening with another one of these how to get a dent out of a hardwood floor situation.

Yeah. We want to know. Learn with us. Maybe how to get a dent out of a hardwood floor situations. Yeah. We want to know. Learn with us. Maybe how to kill a Nazi. Yeah, probably. How to make a good pikelet. They did that. Yeah, and then they made pikelets.

Yeah, those family recipes. Yes. But they always have the good baking tips too, don't they? Yes. Never use a recipe though, do they? Well, they couldn't nip down to the bloody bakery in their day, could they? Yeah. Because it was Germans.

Yeah, the Germans. Because it was Germans. Yeah, the Germans. Because there were just Germans everywhere. Bloody Germans. There's a granny on TikTok with some just insane tips and hacks for life. Yeah, she's great. She's great. And she's taken TikTok and the internet by storm. We were asking this morning, and right now,

like what you learn from your grandparents, those little life hacks. Nana taught me to roll a nice tight ciggy. Oh, you've got to keep it tight. You've got to keep it tight. But not too tight. And not too wet on the lick. I don't know, but that's... Yeah, you don't want to be smoking a wet rollie.

The skills, eh? My grandad taught me the perfect shandy ratio. Oh, God, I love a shandy. Yeah. Do you go with Sprite Zero? I haven't had a shandy in years. I'd like this perfect ratio shandy ratio. Oh, God, I love a shandy. Yeah. Do you go with Sprite Zero? I haven't had a shandy in years. I'd like this perfect ratio shandy recipe, please. My grandparents taught me to play poker.

They loved card games, though, because they didn't have, like, internet. Yeah. Yeah. My granny tried to teach me how to crochet. Then would yell at me every five minutes for being left-handed. I mean, she did try. Left-handed people love that. They used to smack the left-handed out of you.

They did. They missed me. We'll get to more of your texts next. We're talking about the skills your grandparents taught you. They know some bloody good tricks. Yes. Bloody good tricks. A few grannies on TikTok just absolutely educating the world. Granny talks.

Granny talks. Huge. There's ask your auntie, ask your granny, ask your grandpa. Amber, what did the grandparents teach you? My grandmother taught me that when you're at the supermarket and you're getting stuff out of the freezer, your frozen goods, your ice cream, whatever, you don't take the top one. You go a couple of levels down.

Is it because the top one is more likely to have a temperature fluctuation so it might be a bit more icy? Could be. I didn't even think about that. Wait, you don't know why you do this? No, she didn't actually explain why. To be fair, I was probably quite young. But that makes sense.

It's the thing that I always remember. I think it's the temperature fluctuation. Because back in the day, a lot more freezers at the supermarket were open, whereas most of them have lids now or their doors. And then back in the day, they could have been sitting there all day. And then you grab the top one.

It would be more... I know that that's true of milk and bread because they stock them from the back. So you go through the back to get the freshest milk and the freshest bread. Yeah, the longest expiry date. The freezer, I didn't know.

When you get in deodorant, you go right to the back because the front ones are probably being tested and sprayed. Opened and sniffed and sprayed. They always are. And you're getting a couple of less squirts. Interesting, Amber.

Amber, thank you. Emma, what did the grandparents teach you? Hey, guys. How are you going? Good, good. Really well, thank you. Good, good. Well, it's probably something everybody knows to do,

but with roast potatoes, you parboil them first. So five, ten minutes in boiling water, dump the water out, chuck some butter and salt in, fluff them up and then roast them. Of course, yes. I know, but it's so good when you figure that out because how many years were you roasting potatoes being like, what is wrong with this?

Yeah, why are they not crispy? They're not crispy at all. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, so it's just a cold banana. What do I do? Yeah. Isn't it great? I don't hold your bloody horses, everybody.

There's something to do with corn flour or something as well for extra crispy roast potatoes. Oh, yeah. Almost a batter. Oh a bit of a, almost a batter. Almost a batter. It's just a sprinkling of cornflour. Would you say a dusting? A dusting? A dusting?

A sprinkling? I'd say a dusting. A light dusting or a sprinkle. And then when you roll it around with the butter and salt, and I tell you what, good time to put in some garlic powder. Chicken salt. That's getting way too bougie for Nana. You're getting too fancy for you, Emma.

Some rosemary? Well, for Nana. Nana would be bougie as hell. Yeah, my Nana was simple, but she was a kumara gal because she lived in Dark Hill. Kumara and butter and salt and pepper. If you can crisp up a kumara, then my hat's off to you. Good luck to you.

Say impossible. Amazing. Thank you. Some messages in to finish. I've got to find the tab Because now I've got Perfect roast potatoes Open on multiple tabs

When are you going to do a barbecue And do us some like Sexy meat Some slappy meat Where you give it the old Somebody messaged me The other day on Instagram And said it's been a while

Since you slapped the meat And I said no It was this morning What are you talking about And they said They said No on the barbecue And I said You're, it was this morning. What are you talking about? And they said, no, on the barbecue. And I said, you're dead right. It's just, to be honest, it's just not been a summer conducive to barbecuing.

It's been too windy and too wet. Yeah. Okay. As soon as we get into our 8 a.m. break before the news, we're opening up the cows. All of us. Because I want to go. Oh, the calendar.

Slap some meat. Slap some meat. Some other things grandparents have been the teachers for? Somebody said, my granddad taught me how to pack his pipe because I had the perfect little fingers. This is the smoke, this is the tobacco, getting it in there. My granddad smoked a pipe before I was born.

I never saw him smoke a pipe, but how does it work? How hard do you have to pack in the... I don't know. The backy. Yeah. Pack that in there and get it going. My grandparents taught me how to make delicious chocolate eclairs. My name is Marlene. Chocolate eclair from scratch.

She knows what she's doing. My granddad taught me how to make his favorite cocktail. It was a whiskey-based drink. I was five when I made my first one. Yum. So you got to train and that makes me want to have a kid. Yeah. Well, your kids are good at Aperol's, aren't they?

Yeah, they make a good Aperol's. Yeah. And Negroni. And Negroni Spag a kid. Yeah. Well, your kids are good at Aperols, aren't they? Yeah, they make a good Aperol. Yeah. Negroni. Negroni Spagliatos. Yeah, good. They make a good one of those, too. Nana taught me that peeing in a bucket, then pouring it straight on the roots of the lemon tree, you'll end up with amazing, healthy lemons.

I know. You're not going to problem with my lime tree. I don't. I will not accept your limes. If I will. Yeah, I've got good wheeze. You see that I drink a lot of water. It's nitrogen.

It's weird. I have nitrogen in my wheeze. I thought that was what made it good. The ureary. I don't know. It feels weird. The nitrogen. The wee limes.

Your wee limes, yeah. Grandparents taught me how to fight. And you've got a fungal infection. Sorry? The limes have got a fungal infection. Oh, I was like, no. Yeah, that's what they said. You've got a fungal infection on your limes.

Yeah, not me. She's all clear. Not my wee. It's not that area. Okay, good. I'm clear now. My grandparents taught me to play poker, and just like the way they taught me to play poker

was just cleaning me out of the buttons we played with until I learnt the rules. Wow. Wow. Yeah. It was good. I work in a retirement home so I get lots of tips. You got Granny's on Tap.

You should make a TikTok channel. Granny's on Tap. That'd be great. Go and get their tips. My favourite was when I was pregnant and suffering from

restless leg syndrome. I was up all night pacing up and down. My legs were exhausted. The oldies told me to put potatoes and or bars of soap under the sheets

at the end of the bed. I slept like a baby for the rest of my pregnancy. What? What's going on there? What is the potato? Potatoes. What? And then take the potatoes, parboil them, roll them around with some butter and some corn flour and some garlic salt.

Yes. And roast them. So yesterday I admitted to you all that I had a three hour nap Wild That's not a nap, that's a sleep That's a deep, deep sleep You know what, I just got home and we'd had a big bricky And I just wanted to hop into bed for a bit

And it was stormy outside and it's like I've lost all motivation I know Haven't been going to the gym, we've got takeaways I've been drinking wine during the week I feel like been going to the gym. We've got takeaways. I've been drinking wine during the week. I feel like that's kind of the nation's mood at the moment. Just this week doesn't count. It's not real.

This is just like a bad nightmare and we'll just start again next week. Anyway, so my nap was broken up into two parts. One and a half hours apart. Okay. And the only reason it wasn't a continual three-hour nap slash sleep was the of Aaron eating some fricking toast next to me in bed. I like the man at his toast. In bed? Toast in bed?

That's a crummy food. So crummy. We've got fresh sheets on the bed and everything. And I was like, ugh. Did he have a plate? He had a plate. food. So crummy. We've got fresh sheets on the bed and everything. And I was like, ugh. Did he have a plate? He had a plate. Big plate? Dinner plate.

Dinner plate. He had a dinner plate. And to be fair at the moment, we don't have any other furniture in our house other than the bed. Because you're renovating. Because of the renovation. That was the only place he could have eaten the toast. Well, no, there's camping chairs in the lounge. Right.

Plonk your butt on that and eat your crunchy. What was on his toast? He eats very grainy, seedy toast. Also very crunchy. I mean, he had Vegemite and cheese. Vegemite and cheese. Yeah. Pungent.

But very crunchy toast. Right. And then I saw this stat that said only one third of adults ban eating from the bedroom. Meaning the majority of us are just slip slop slapping our food around in our sexy space. Well I think it was different when I, because living alone I just eat on the couch. So if I'm watching movies or whatever I just eat on the couch. Whereas when I was flatting and I wanted just to watch movies in my room. You'd have to

eat on the bed. I'd just eat on the bed And I'd just be like, I don't care But in the bed or on the bed? In and on Yeah In and on Definitely in and on It was definitely under the sheets or on top of the sheets

Under the sheets, yeah Right There'd definitely be the odd time when you'd wake up and find a Malteser Yeah Flattened But if you're having a meal, you have to sit at the end of the bed No, no With your meal on your lap

No, see, I would never do a meal. I'd either do it at my desk or in the kitchen. Right. Yeah, no, I don't even eat meals in bed. Sometimes if we take away pizza, we'll eat it in bed and we'll put a towel out. To soak up any residual grease. Because you need the spray if you get some pizza juice on your T-shirt. On the duvet, yeah.

No, we can't have that. I'm not a huge fan of eating in bed. I thought there'd be more people banning eating in bed. Yeah, it's only a third. Two thirds of people say that it's not a hard rule in their relationship. Other than when it comes to soup, pasta and stir fries. Soup's a spill. Pasta's sloppy. Stir fry, you're going to get a rogue bean in the bed, aren't you? Yeah, bean and rice sometimes. Soup's a spill. Pasta's sloppy.

Stir fry, you're going to get a rogue bean in the bed, aren't you? Yeah, bean and rice sometimes if you've got it with it. You're going to get a saucy bean, slip slide down somewhere into the sheets. Good luck ever finding that thing. Or a rectangle carrot. Yes. From the stir fry packet.

Or carrot julienne. Slip, slip, slide. But what about brekkie in bed? That's nice. Nah. No, because that'sie in bed? That's nice. Nah. No, because that's sloppy as well if it's cereal. Yeah, you eat cereal like a child. Any good breakfast.

I mean toast. But then if you're making someone a breakfast in bed, you can't give them toast. It's got to be a little bit more. It's got to be egg-based. Yes. Egg as the hero. So I don't know what scrambled eggs.

I'd rather just say, we're cooking you breakfast, and I'll say, I'll come to the kitchen when it's ready. Yeah. I'm into that. Sure, that takes the romance out of it and all that, but. Ice cream in bed was okay. Chocolate, I suppose when you've post dinner and you're in bed. I haven't eaten chocolate in bed for ages.

But it rules. Like drop a little bit. I mean, we used to do that at hotels, have a bit of chocolate on the bed, drop it. It looks like poops. Yeah, it looks like poops. You have to leave a note for the cleaner saying, that's not poops, I promise. I didn't poo the bed, it's chocolate.

What about a drink in bed? Yeah, yum. Rules when you're like, well, I want to go to bed, but I also want one more drink. I will pour it, and I'll drink it while I'm in bed. Do a little bit of both. How very luxurious. Goodbye, Internet Explorer. How very luxurious. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley.

Goodbye, Internet Explorer. We talked about this when they announced. Can we have some sad music? Internet Explorer. Have you got some Fix You? Some Coldplay or something? Yeah, something Coldplay-y. So I've just thrown that on you there.

I've got my sad songs to cry by. Do you have a playlist called Sad Songs? I've got two of those. I would love to hear that. Music to cry by. What's in your playlist? Here we go. Oh, this is always on TV shows, this song. To build a home.

Yeah. That's the name of the song. Okay, let's start then. Internet Explorer, it's out today. I know there's a lot happening in the world I know we've got bigger things to worry about

yeah we're flooded it's huge though Internet Explorer's final day such fond memories yeah the E with the going around

and because it was you'd always get a computer with Windows it was the default browser unless you downloaded something else like Netscape, Navigator or Firefox back in the day. Or Mozilla. Yeah. So today, the last day of his existence.

Today's the last day, yeah. It's going to ping off your computer and be gone. And then we all laughed at Bing, didn't we? Microsoft Bing. But that's more of a homepage, isn't it? No, Bing's a search engine. Search engine, yeah. It's the default search engine

You'd have to go into settings Mum, go into settings Where's settings? It should be at the top It's been a while since I've used a Windows computer But at the top there's settings And then it should say default search engine Click on that

Where it says Bing Yep, highlight that And then, right, right, Google. G-O, no, G-O-O. Not Google. No, that's Goggle. Yeah, G-O-O-G-L-E dot com. Yeah.

And then press enter and go back, and now it should have changed. Joke's on us because Bing's got AI now, and apparently it's going to be amazing. Yeah, I know. It's going to get us. It's going to get us. It's going to get us. Foot rebrand. They're just going to just quickly change to some of the sad music.

I felt like that one was building up a little bit too much. Do you know, I've got these playlists as well, because remember last year we talked about songs that make you cry. Yeah. So I've got Tear Jerkers, the saddest songs of all time. And then I've also got sad rock songs that make you cry, featuring Linkin Park and the likes. What Linkin Park song makes you cry?

Let's have a look what they've got. Numb. That's not a crying song. In the end. In the end, it doesn't even matter. Yeah, it doesn't even matter. I don't know if that one will. Creep by Radiohead.

Zombie the Cranberries. Oh, yeah. Bit of Cranberries. Bring me to life. Evanescence. Just to have a cry of some Jeff Buckley. So there was a Valentine's Day software update and that permanently disabled the browser.

Why did they do that? Literally, that last update was the lethal injection. Yeah. I didn't even see it coming. It's emotional, man. Yeah, so it's going to be gone. It's going to be not working. Not working anymore.

It's an RIP. But, I mean, nobody's been using it for ever anyway, have they? That's why they got rid of it. I feel like the last website I visited on Internet Explorer was dollsmania.com. Dollsmania. Dollsmania. And you could dress up these sort of little characters. Or Neopets probably

A bit of Neopets action Did you ever have a Geocities blog? No I didn't have a Geocities blog Too young I wonder if my Neopets are still alive They'll be bloody starving at this point I reckon they will have gone feral I reckon they will have gone feral

And eaten each other And only the strongest will have survived Yeah you'll have one left Yeah Username it was like Groovy baby or something. Is Neopets still functioning? I think it's got an app.

It's got an app for Neopetting. No, Neopets Fairies Hope Play Today, available from the Apple Store. Oh, so your Neopets are dead? Time for more sad music. Oh. I'm so sorry for your Neopets. What were they called, your Neopets? I can't remember them.

That's even sadder. Wow, you're a terrible parent. I can't even remember their names. Thank you, Johnny. What were their names? Probably like... Probably named after a boy you liked at the time. Yeah, I had a crush on Pat.

Pat. Wait, you had an 80-year-old man. Patrick. Oh, Patrick. Yeah. Patty would have been more. No, he went by Pat. He went by Pat.

He went by Pat. Not Rick. He wanted to be. He was older than me. Like a couple of years older. And he lived around the block. And he had a skateboard and dreads. He had dreads.

Yeah, baby. What year are we talking? I heart Pat. 2003. I feel like bomb funk MCs were responsible for a lot of dreadlocks. Yeah, the biggest, biggest Jane. But those dreadlocks

on this Pat sound like they were getting towards the end of the acceptable term of dreadlocks on a white guy. Shout out to Pato Sullivan, man. Pato Sullivan, is there a more Irish sound? Did he come around? Oi, I'm going skateboarding. Would you like to come skateboarding with me, Hayley? I'm going to wear me dreadlocks. I'm going to jump on Facebook, try to find it.

It's never too late. Everyone's going to be searching for Patrick O'Sullivan now. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. I'm sorry, did we interrupt your yawing? Yeah, you did actually, sorry The worst of times How very rude Today's fact of the day

You know we did the fact of the day about the pirate William Dampier Who wrote down their first English guacamole recipe. This is a great fact of the day from you. Somebody else said, did you know that a ship captain, someone messaged me. Oh, yeah. Saying if that was of interest to you,

you may be interested in Captain Shaddock. Shaddock? Captain Shaddy. Captain Shaddy. Okay. Sailing around the world, he found a citrus, a pomelo citrus. He took the pomelo citrus home, planted it next to his orange tree.

Hmm. Cross-pollination. And, hello, the grapefruit. Wow. Is that the fact of the day? Today's fact of the day is the grapefruit was a happy coincidence. All these facts about captains. Captains. On the day that Captain James Cook was.

Yesterday. Today, America. Today, America, Captain Cook was killed in Hawaii. Were they called the Sandwich Islands? They were, yes, Fawn. At the time. Correct. Named for Lord Sandwich.

Yeah. Who the sandwich is named after because he liked. I'm just chucking you facts. Bonus fact. Bonus fact. He wanted food that he could eat with one hand so he could continue to play cards. Brilliant. So they put it in bread and they made it a sandwich,

in the sandwich. Yeah, right. And he said, la, la, la. Oh, la, la, la. And then the sandwich islands were also named after him, but they're modern-day Hawaii. So, yeah, he just planted a pomelo next to an orange tree, and then the cross-pollination gave us the grapefruit.

You love grapefruit. I love grapefruit. Except when I'm on the pill. Yeah, you can't. It'll interrupt it. It'll interrupt your... The pill's chemical is something. But any high dose of vitamin C will.

Will it? I don't know. Will it? And the kiwifruits and red capsicums, they any high dose of vitamin C will. Will it? I don't know. Will it? And the kiwi fruits and red capsicums, they're riddled with vitamin C. Oh, I eat capsicums every day. I do eat capsicums every day. I'm sure it's the vitamin C and the thing that can tango with the pill. Yikes.

But also the pill has many, many, many, many, many things that can throw it off. Yeah. Like forgetting to take it. You know? Yeah. That absolutely. Yeah. Like forgetting to take it. You know? That absolutely. Oopsie baby. Oopsie baby. So today's fact of the day is the grapefruit is the result of a happy coincidence when Captain

Shaddock planted his new pomelo tree next to his orange tree. Fact of the day. Day, day, day, day. Yeah. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. I'd like to right now ask if there has been a time in your life where you've taken criticism badly.

Maybe it's a co-worker that said maybe there was a better way for you to do something. Yeah. And you flip out. Yeah. And you flip the desk. You flip a desk. You throw the computer monitor across the office. Yeah, perhaps.

Is this speaking from experience? No. Oh, you threw a printer once, didn't you? When someone said you had a little lisp. I have rage blackouts. Someone said you had a little lisp. I have rage blackouts. I don't

remember what happened. Wow. I think if someone gives you criticism, you just tell them to, I don't know, you just I don't tell them to F on it. Oh yeah. Interesting. Don't take it in and then stew on it all day yeah

interesting thoughts why don't you write off Friday so yeah I don't know is there anybody listening that's had a time

when you've taken criticism badly 0800 DARS at M we'd love to hear your stories because this story and I'll try to keep it as listener friendly listener friendly as possible because it gets a little bit gross Love to hear your stories because this story, and I'll try to keep it as... Listener friendly?

Listener friendly as possible because it gets a little bit gross. A director of a leading German ballet company. Duh. He has been suspended. Duh, that's Russia. Duh. He's been suspended from his job because at the premiere of a new show, a journalist described the production as boring and disjointed.

Right. Yeah, well, that would offend me. He attacked her verbally. Yeah. Went up to her, attacked her verbally, and then produced a bag of dog feces from his pocket and rubbed the contents on her face. Oh! Yucky. He pre-planned it. On her face. He pre-planned it.

He pre-packaged feces. Either that or he'd just been walking the dog and it was in there. That's disgusting. Isn't that insane? Oh, yuck. A reviewer in Edinburgh once called my show empty. Was that because the theatre was empty? No, no.

Empty of any purpose or joy. What was the idea? What was this show? What did you do? I just sang songs and did jokes and stuff. I played a teacher. That's ridiculous. You played a teacher?

It was my first time. Edinburgh's weird, man. She called it empty. But it was your first time and they see that. Did you get any other good reviews or feedback? Yeah, I got great reviews

but there was this one little review. That was the one. This is the thing. I got great reviews. This is me, isn't it? I get a great review but that little one

and I remember being like and I had a really bad day, and then I cut it out, and it's in a scrapbook for my mum. Okay, well, there you go. So that's how you handle bad. Taking it back. Yeah, bad feedback. Yeah, I don't get a lot of bad feedback.

That we tell you. No, I don't get any. You don't say that in New Zealand because we like to fill gaps. We're gap fillers. She's not going to get any bad feedback. I've got a couple of thoughts. You don't invite it. You don't say that in New Zealand because we like to fill gaps. Yeah. We're gap fillers. She's not going to get any bad feedback. I've got a couple of thoughts. You don't invite it. You don't ask.

Yeah. I don't ask for feedback and I want feedback. I do struggle with feedback. It's a good thing about doing this show. No one reviews radio shows. You know, there's not like a weekly review. There's not a movie review or a TV show review. Yeah.

No one reviews it. Three stars. Here's my feedback on how it could be. What if someone burned their house down? I'd rub dog shit in their face. Here's a true colour. It's coming out now. Three stars.

They'll ruin the day. Two stars, I'll cut their brakes. So we want to ask this morning, 0800DARS at M, give us a call, text 9696. When did you take some criticism badly? Whether it was work or free maybe? Yeah, maybe it was big or small.

Maybe some friends said, hey, maybe you need to change deodorant. Yeah. I'd take that badly too. Hey, at least they're telling you though, right? No, yeah, that's fair. That's fair. Because you might not be aware. Yeah. And that's trying to help you out for other people.

Yeah. Yeah. Or, okay, maybe your friends said, hey, maybe don't sing as much. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, maybe you want to go get some lessons or something. I feel like the self-taught

thing's not really working. When have you taken criticism badly? So, this news out of Germany. A ballet director had some feedback, a review from his opening night show from a journalist. Boring and disjointed,

I believe, were the words. Yes, and vacant? No, no, mine was empty. Yours was empty. My review was empty. But you didn't message the reviewer, did you? No, I was young and wanted to be liked still. Nowadays, I'd message

them, or maybe I'd get a bag of dog feces and smear it on her face. Like this is what this guy did. He verbally abused her and then pulled out the doggy poo bag. Shmear, shmear, shmear on the face. She's smelling that forever. That's in your hair.

Ever stood a dog shit? That shoe needs to be burned. Yeah. So we want to know when you've taken feedback badly. Behave poorly, perhaps. What have you done? Anonymous, let's start with you. Good morning, Anonymous.

Always good. When did you not handle feedback? So it wasn't me. It was my mother. Okay. So she got called into her boss's office and her boss said, hey, look, some people in the office are finding you aggressive and confronting. I like your mother.

And she got upset, so she went around and asked every single person in the office if they find her aggressive and confronting. That's very aggressive. That's literally breaking the point. Everyone, of of course said no So obviously her manager had an issue with her Oh my god No I think she

Scared everybody so much Vaughn do you find me aggressive and confronting? No I don't No Fletch do you find me aggressive and confronting? No not at all Producers booth? No I didn't think so Good

Jot it down Amazing anonymous Thank you T Tasha. When did you not handle criticism well? So my husband took me to a beautiful Italian restaurant and was looking at the menu and said, Oh, gosh, I haven't had a good lasagna since my mom passed away. I'd made a lasagna the week before.

But to be fair, your lasagna wasn't as good as his mouth. Yeah, yours was sloppy. It was a bit watery. Yeah, yours was sloppy. Clearly not. And to save him from that, I have never made him lasagna again. She's making a little shitty. Wow.

No, I wouldn't. I wouldn't do it. She's making a little shitty. What should we have for dinner? Because God knows it won't be lasagna. No, exactly. Exactly. Okay, exactly. Exactly. Okay, and did he backtrack

when you brought that up, or? Completely. I looked at him, it took him a while, though. I don't think it should have taken him so long to realise.

What are you doing? He sounds neat. It must be your bishamal. I'm sorry you didn't enjoy last week. Oh, that's so sassy. It's the South African accent too. You feel like you're about to get clobbered.

Amazing. Tasha, thank you. Some messages in when you've handled feedback badly. My husband was micromanaging me and I didn't take it well, so I said F off, led into a whopper of a fight. And then I bought up all the stuff that I'd been storing up. No! We can't be storing.

Do you, when you do that, bring up the list like a little notepad on your app phone? It's a mental list. It's a mental list. It's a mental list. Oh, yeah.

No, no, no. Women don't need to write these things down. No, no. They're seed in there, are they? Oh, yeah. Oh, okay.

Oh, yeah. Wow, interesting. And then when they use them, they just put them back at the bottom of the queue. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they go, okay. Oh, yeah. Wow, interesting. And then when they use them, they just put them back at the bottom of the queue. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they go through all the other, it's like shoving a deck of cards. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You can use the ace of spades now, now put it at the bottom. Right. By the time you get back to the ace of spades, it's got a fresh feeling to it. Yeah. Wow. I auditioned for a show when I was 30 years old.

I was told I was no spring chicken and I'd need to lose some weight. Oh, far out. And was no oil painting. Oh, my God. Didn't take that well. I showed them. Now I'm 62 years old.

Now I'm a director and a choreographer. Yeah, hello. Well done. Yes. Suck it. I told the singer in our band after a gig to maybe stop playing tambourine until they could play in time better. An out of time tambourine though.

It's wild. Me if I played in a band. Yeah. She packed a shit and said she was thinking of leaving the band anyway. Yeah. I was flatting and I thought I'd mow the lawns. My then boyfriend and now husband said, shit, those lines are crooked and I've never done the lawn since.

We've been together 30 years. I love people digging in their heels. I just love it when they're like, okay, those lines are crooked and I've never done the lawn since. We've been together 30 years. I love people digging in their heels. I just love it when they're like, okay, fine. Just before all this rain, Sade mowed this. She said, I'll mow the lawns. I was away at that stag do. She's like, I'll mow the lawns. I'm like, okay.

And I was honestly fine with her doing it. Did you say it like that? Probably. That's got to tell. In my mind, the okay was, it's quite a big task. Yeah. Okay. Can you handle it?

Kind of. Wow. But she did it and she did it fine. Fine. Fine. Holy cow. She did it fine. Okay.

But every time I would go to the window and look out the window, she'd say, you're looking at the lawns, aren't you? And I said, no, I'm just enjoying the rural vista that we've got ourselves here. And then she made me redo them. And she's like, go and redo them. I was like, what? They don't need to be redone. She's like, go and redo them.

She's very persistent. So they did need to be redone. Oh, my God, it felt good to get them redone. Yeah, it was haggardy-piggledy. It felt good to do the proper, like, the edging around the trees felt good. Yeah, right. You know what I'm saying? I don't just do one height for the entire grounds. It's not good to do the proper, like, the edging around the trees. It's not good. Yeah, right. What I'm saying is that, you know, and I adjust.

I don't just do one height for the entire, you know, grounds. I'll adjust as to how I feel that grass is growing. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Mow it a certain way. She's never going to mow them again. Hopefully not. What did you say? My sister got so pissed off.

It's her birthday today. Happy birthday. Get her some lawn mowing lessons. I'm going to get her a how-to. How to mow your lawn for dummies. My first lawnmower. Dummies guide to mowing lawns. My sister got so pissed off with her husband

saying she wasn't holding a champagne glass properly, she put it on the floor and crushed it with her bare foot. Oh, my God. She needed a four-hour operation to repair her severed nerves in her foot. They're still together, but she always gets handed plastic glasses now just in case she gets pissed off again. Oh my god, that's Now if you're going to go full muzzle-toff,

you need a thick shoe and a towel over to hold on to the glass. I would do something like that. That's some anger. I've got such a short temper for that stuff. My husband once said the coffee was nice, it just wasn't quite hot enough, and I've never made him a coffee since.

I just love people holding on to this stuff. So good. Hi-yi-yi-ya. Hey guys, apparently being the company's most successful podcast isn't enough.

They want us to tell people to tell more of their friends. So people are clearly liking it but we have to tell them to tell others to like it. See, I would concentrate more on the shitter podcasts that the company makes. Yeah, same.

You know, the real losers out there. Same. No, no, no, we'll just... Yeah. Maybe we won't say nice. Maybe we should even encourage people to listen to other podcasts that the company makes. Yeah.

No, but only after ours. Yeah, nah. Nah, don't do that. And not more than ours. Give us a sexy little review, though. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.