ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 17th October 2022

Episode Date: October 16, 2022

Manners  August & the Chocolate  Top 6: Supermarket Signs  Hayley Sproull: Celebrity  SoupHayley & Koru  Producer Jared dyed  Monday Maestro's!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to MacCafe. Download, scan and play the Monopoly game at Mac has to be in to win. Vaughn, you're a simple man. I am, yes. Thank you, Vaughn. Simple pleasures are drawn from simple things.

Yeah, they are. And can really turn your day around. You know, sometimes if I'm feeling a bit low, you know what I do? What? Was that the way that Hayley and I both looked at you? Like, what? Where's this going? Are you feeling a bit low?

Sometimes when I'm feeling a bit low, do you know what I do? And then you're expecting, you know, like some serious answer. Call my mother and... I say, mother, am I a good boy? No, I will lie on the floor of the hallway and flick the doing thing that stops them.

Oh, yeah. Love that. Doing, doing, doing. Don't go... That's... If you want to... You've got to kind of try to get it to go circular.

Yeah. So you don't just go one side to the other. We've got one in the entire house. They're not in vogue. No, I've got the other. We've got one in the entire house. They're not in vogue. No, I've got the knob. I've got the knob in the floor. I know, it's boring.

Yeah, like you push it back and it's a soft plastic and it gives a bit of a... No, not that. It's just a hard rubber. No, but it'll bang your door. Knock your doors. No. Mine's a little bit softer. It's a little bit like...

You've got them screwed into the floor with a rubber thing around them. Yeah. Oh my God, hotel much? Yeah, what is this, an office? God, have a touch of Have a touch of lived in You know Oh yeah no

They're great They're great Fletch Corp Yeah The headquarters of Fletch Corp Yeah nice Living in the industrial age Well I mean I'd love a

Doinga doinga doinga But they don't suit I need an in floor I need an in floor knob Yeah you do You do Not a side They're too far away.

Right. So you like your knobs hard and in the floor. Hard and in the floor. Yep. And quite wide, too. Yeah, girthy. Yep. Not boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing,

and wall-mounted. Okay. Well, no, the reason I bring this up is because simple sounds do bring me joy. Yeah. Like the doi-oi-oi-oi-oi-oi-oi-oi. Same. So imagine my extreme pleasure. Somebody sent me a link to this.

This is a clip from Modern Warfare 2. The game? Yes. Yep. And there's a new sniper rifle in Modern Warfare 2. Ooh. And one guy thinks it sounds like a popular song. Here we go.

Wait, it sounds like what? My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. Mmm. Oh! Listen, listen. My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I also love it. This is true.

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. It does. It does. How good. How good. Wow. It's so satisfying. And I think I like a bit of when it was

Being like boom chika boom chika boom My milkshake brings to the bars of the yard I love the things that, that's what Kelly sounds like My milkshake brings, my milkshake brings to the bars of the yard This is almost as good as when the goat fell down the stairs And it sounded like the drum break on Deer Tonight No, the deer, the deer climbing through the kids' playground Have you got that? That is good Find that, find that Deer on here tonight. The deer climbing through the kids' playground.

Have you got that? That is good. Find that. Deer. He like stumbles through a kid's plastic playground. And what's it meant to sound like? You'll hear it. Okay. You'll hear it.

Oh, here we go. You'll hear it. The deer's just approaching. Here we go. It's about to fall That's good, that's good Oh, it satisfies me too much That is good stuff

Alright, well back home for you to play with your doinger doinger Yeah, I'm off home for a little fiddle with the doinger Give yourself a bit of a doing in the hallway. Yeah, but well, I'll probably... Shouldn't we get a light out the floor of the hallway for once? I like the wrist. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Thank you, Sam.

Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. What's up, guys? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? Sup?

Sup? Yeah. Can you just start sorting? What's up? Sup? Sup? Penta Star sorting out all your gym classes for the week? I'm sucking down a terrible gritty protein shake. I will admit, guys, I absolutely fell off the bandwagon this weekend because I went to Christchurch. It's hard when you're away. Yeah, it's hard to have a journey to health. Oh, my God, I have to say Christchurch was beautiful this weekend.

Yeah. Like, the willow trees were willowing. Were they willowing? They were willowing. Quite hard. What time of the year again is it? Cherry blossoms. Oh, yeah.

They were cherrying. Were blossoming. Well, they were blossoming. Yeah, yeah, not cherrying. Got my verbs confused there. The sun was shining. Summer shining. Beautiful.

It was just gorgeous. The wind was... Howling. Howling. At some moments it was. Summer shining. Beautiful. It was just gorgeous. The wind was howling. Howling. Some moments it was. Howling. I had a lovely weekend in Christchurch but I did eat so much naan bread. Yeah.

We've got some really good, authentic authentic Indian good naans. Did you go garlic and cheese naan or just plain naan? I tell you what, I went onion culture. Thank you. Go on. Onion culture.

You know the cultures? So it's like kind of thicker and sometimes it's like stuffed with onions and garlic. Oh, yeah, yeah. What do you say they call cultures? Culture, like, uh, K with a K? Oh my god, I'm sorry. Yeah, culture. K-U-L-C-H-A. Right. I'm sorry to our Indian

listeners. They're like, oh my god, it's an onion culture. But god, it was so good. Yum. Tell you what, Mumbawala and Christchurch. Well, it's taken just a couple of minutes into the show and we're already on food. Damn it, damn it. Journey to health, though. Coming up into the show and we're already on food. Damn it. Damn it. Do you need a health though? Coming up on the show, the top six.

Yeah, the top six budget-friendly ways to show people you are ready to make love in the supermarket. Not in the supermarket, but you're in the supermarket when you're picking up at the supermarket. Yeah, you know, your traditional ones. There's a lot of traditional ones involving produce. Well, that shit's just too expensive to be playing around with these days. Oh, like your bananas if they're up in the trolley. Yeah, you put your bananas on the edge and on the certain face in a certain way. That means, you know, you're keen, but you can't afford to be tangoing with a group of nans nowadays.

God, no. So I've got some more budget-friendly ways to let people know you're ready to tango at the supermarket. All right. Got a silly little poll as well coming up soon. Really testing the trustworthiness of the nation, the honesty, I should say, of the nation. The integrity. The integrity. Yeah.

It's coming up. Next on the show, though. I am Hayley. And next up, I tell you what, it's a break that's going to blow your mind. What I'm going to do is we're going to play a song and I'm going to read about it. Because I can't tell you what it is now, but boy, oh boy. You know what we call this? You've pulled a Vaughan.

It's pretty popular, pulling a Vaughan. I'm loving it, Vaughan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm flying by the seat of my pants right now. It's a lifestyle. It's not for everybody, but people that have adapted, they love it. Well, don't go anywhere because I tell you what, one hell of a break coming up next. And you told someone off at the airport.

I did. Oh, here it is. Here it is. I did. I tried to teach someone some manners. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. I did mention slightly earlier that I went to Christchurch. Yes.

And I will say Christchurch Airport, it's got to step up its game a little bit, just because a lot of it was closed. Well, yeah, a lot of, that's the same with a lot of airports. Yeah. What happened? Post-pandemic. Yeah.

They just haven't, like, kicked off, have they? Because the numbers aren't there, I guess. Well, more importantly, the pop. Oh, you believe in that, do you? What? Pandemic. I believe it's done. It's over?

Yeah, it's finished, right? I believe it's done. Right. Oh, you bought into that line. Yeah, there's no big wave coming. Just a flu. Anyway, so I went there yesterday because I filmed. I was working all weekend

Yeah Oh what a hero Yeah thank you very much Yeah What a great work ethic Thank you so much Yeah Paying a bit of GST

Keeping the country afloat Working all weekend What is GST? Ladies and gentlemen I do a job They pay me They give me GST And then the government says

Give it to me Yep And then I give it to you Only if you haven't spent money on your business. We'll just go tick up stuff on your business. Correct. But then you... You still have to pay most of it back.

Then the person you're giving the money to owes the GST. Oh, okay. What is it? They always want money, don't they? It feels like pass the parcel. It is parcel. You give me GST, I give it back to the government, the government gives it back to you if they claim it,

I'm claiming it. Anyway, what was I saying? Okay, I was working this week. You're a hero. Like an absolute hero. You're a hero. A freelance hero. Yeah.

And afterwards, we finished filming. We had to rush to the airport, Christchurch Airport, and I got there and I was like, oh, that was a big weekend of work. Let's have a beer. Okay. The only pub at Christchurch Airport is closed at the moment. It's a Max Brewery.

What's the deal? It's just closed. It's closed. So I found one of those like cafes, you know, that has a little wine or something. And I went in and there was a very young boy there behind the counter. And I reckon he'd rather be anywhere else but at work on that day. Well, so would you though.

Given his demeanour. Right. So would you though. And I saw how he was interacting with the other customers and I thought, come on, mate. Times are tough. You know, you've got to give it a little something. So I came to the till and he stared at me

and I said, hello. And he didn't say hello. He just waited for my something. So I came to the till and he stared at me and I said, hello. And he didn't say hello. He just waited for my order. So I said again, hello. And I stared him in the eye until he said hello. Because he felt uncomfortable. This is your thing. You don't let people get away with it.

He's not acknowledging you back. Acknowledge me. I'm about to give you my hard-earned cash. I've been outside in the sun all day. He's probably earning minimum wage. He's working on a Sunday. He's probably hungover. Yeah, but his manager would care if I took my business elsewhere.

It's not his bar or cafe. If the manager cares so much, why isn't he working on a Sunday? Yeah. Or she? No, no, I know for a fact it's a he. Do you? Close personal friend. Oh, my God, no.

A woman would be too frazzled to run a cafe at the airport. Anyway, I just couldn't stand for it. You told him off. It was such a mum. This is what my mum would do. This is such a mum thing to do, which is like, just staring at them. Hello.

All right. That's what my mum does. If we walk into a store, if she needs something from that store, if we walk into a store and they don't immediately say, hi, hello, hi there, she'll walk around being like, well, I'm not bloody buying any of it anyway.

I'll just have to... What does she care? And she says it nice and loud, I'll just have to take my business elsewhere if I'm obviously taking up... I'll just have to be obviously taking up your time, your precious time, if you don't have enough time to say hello to me? So you've turned into your mum. Yeah, I absolutely have.

Yeah, wow. And this poor kid just wants to get through his shift. Just say hello. But also, it goes both ways, right? I was just reading about this cafe overseas that if you use your manners, they charge you less. So they make like chai tea. Yum.

Chai tea. Yeah. So if you say to them, Desi chai, it's five pounds. Right. If you say, Desi chai, please, it's three pounds. If you say, hello, Desi chai, please, it's one pound 90. Wow. And they've got a sign there. And on their Instagram, it says, being polite It's £1.90. Wow. And they've got a sign there.

And on their Instagram, it says, being polite goes a long way. Wow. So if you just come in and you're rude and you don't know about this. Yep. Hi. It'll be £5. Oh, no, don't even say hi. Chai tea.

That's rude. Who could say that? Like, I bet people do. Even if you're a shitty, who could be like, try. Like, lots of people would, I reckon.

I just can't imagine saying, not being like, hey, long black please. Yeah, but you're a polite boy. I was raised,

I was raised right. You were raised by the power of the hand. Because if you didn't say please, you would have got a hiding. Flip around the ears.

Play, Zed M's, Fletch, Vaughn, and Hayley. Watermelon sugar. Hello. Watermelon sugar. Hello. Hello.

Hi. We had some friends over for a dinner at the weekend. Now, Hayley and I can't help but notice we were invited. We were invited. You were invited. I was invited. I was here.

Hayley was invited. I was here. Oh, so you were always like... You were at a party. You were at a housewarming party. You always say, I hate hanging out. I just want to do my own thing.

We never hang out outside of work. And now you've just got all these other friends hanging out with you. Man, I had a weekend full of chores. Look, I was really looking forward to it. Trimming hedges, mowing lawns, zipping around. I know. That's how I like to spend my time.

I find it therapeutic. Put on a nice Dungeons and Dragons podcast that's like eight hours long and I just get into some work. I love chores. Were these social engagements thrust upon you by your wife? Yes. And then she said, I want you done by four. Okay. First of all, she said they're going to be here at three. I said, want you done By four Okay

First of all she said They're gonna be here at three I said Are you mad? She was lying That's so early No no She said any time from three

So I had to be done by three I said no no no Tell them later Okay And so she said I want you done by four And then at quarter to four She was out like this

With her hands on her hips Tapping her foot Tap tap tap tap Tap tap tap I was like what? I'm not finished. And there were piles of leaves from my hedge trimming expedition. She's like, leave them for tomorrow.

I was like, but it'll be messy. So I wanted to spend more time. But anyway, yes, a social occasion was thrust upon me. And the people that came for dinner bought like a salad. I don't know. You know, people bring things. What should I bring? a salad. I don't know. You know, people bring things. What should I bring? A salad.

It better be a good salad if you're bringing a salad. They said they don't bring meat to our house because I turn my nose up at it. Oh, yeah, you're a meat snob. No, I've brought a salad to your house, but it's got to be a fancy. It's got to be pomegranate seeds. We know because Sade said she was already taking care

of the pomegranate seed salad. Oh, for God's sake. Why do white girls love a pomegranate salad? Because it adds colour, it adds crunch, it adds sweetness, and it makes it look fancy. The seeds are too hard. No. And some of that cheese.

Halloumi. I don't know what's in there. No, no, no, I'm anti-halloumi, so she wouldn't have put that in there. Halloumi, asparagus, prosciutto. Too squeaky. This is a bougie salad you're describing. Yeah, thanks. I'd love to be invited to a barbecue to share it with.

So, Alfred, it'll happen. Except no halloumi. Too squeaky. So, they bought dessert and bought this box of chocolates. Now, I hadn't seen one of these before. I've had to look it up. It was a Nestle dairy box. Okay. It was a Nestle dairy box.

Okay. It was like the Continental. You've never heard of a Continental box of chocolates? As a kid. And you'd open up the flap and there was a layer. Yeah, and then there was a key on the inside. Did you not have these growing up? That is a rogue choice to bring to dinner. I know.

I was like, interesting. I hadn't seen one for years, but as a kid, I loved it because you'd eat one. And you could play it two ways. You'd eat it and then have to work out which one you just ate in by the flavor. Well, then your brother had to go second. Yes. And then there was always like it would get down to the hard ones.

In our one, it was the rich orange one that was always left behind. Oh, I love orange. Which is now I love them. But at the time when you're a kid, you're like, no, I want... In our one, it was the rich orange one that was always left behind. Oh, I love orange. Which is, now I love them. But at the time, when you're a kid, you're like, no, I want the gooey one. There's always the hard, like, that toffee favourite. Or, no, what are those? Yeah, roses.

But these ones were like posh roses because they came in a plastic tray, right? When you're a kid, they're continental. Yeah, they're not wrapped. Ooh. And you'd feel like the Queen of England picking at a chocolate. And you'd be like, I want the hazelnut praline.

Oh, what must be like to be royalty? So I hadn't had one for ages. Yeah. And a couple were had on the night and then last night I said,

do we still have that box of chocolates? Shardie said, yeah, there's a few left. How's that journey to health going? Well, I always take the weekends off

and I will make no apologies for it. Good for you. My journey to health is a Monday to Friday. That's fair. You've got to live a little. Yeah. So August went and got the box of chocolates and we opened it up and I was like, look and then this one's hazing. Was it her first time

with like a chocolate key? Yeah. It was. She was like amazing. A map of the chocolates. She's had favourites, but that's different because it's all you recognise it by the key. Yeah, it was. She was like, amazing. A map of the chocolates. She's had favourites, but that's different because it's all, you recognise it by the wrapper. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It tells you what it is. You don't care what it's required. And so. It's almost like a teaching thing, isn't it? It's a real teaching moment. It's a real teaching moment. It was, it felt good.

Like how to teach them the picture. Yeah, identify that. And that corresponds to the. Read what you want. Yeah. And then, you know, pick the one you want. And then so there was

one last one left and she said, last one, the one you want. And then so there was one last one left and she said, last one, you can have it. And I said to her, last one, and I put my fingers under the top layer and revealed the second layer

of chocolates because it's one of those ones as well, which you may remember from the Continental. There's two layers and you're like, oh, second layer. Surprise.

Oh, what is that? To be the queen. You should have seen her face. I wish I'd recorded it. I was like, there's second layer. Surprise. Oh, what is that? To move the queen. You should have seen her face. I wish I'd recorded it. I was like, there's a, and I pulled it up and she was just like, oh, secret chocolates. I was like, yes, secret chocolates. Now she knows, though.

You shouldn't have told her. So that. Because you as a family could share this box. The top layer. And then you say, goodnight, girls, and you go, aha. Aha. Also, she was like. A chocolate, my love. She was letting you have the last one because it was a shit one. Yeah, it was a flavour she didn't want.

Yeah, gross. She just identified that she didn't want it. Then did she get back into the good flavours? Oh, yeah, she was back into it on the bottom layer. Yum. And then we absolutely polished off the bottom layer, too. Was there a layer under that one? Oh, we really hoped there was, but we looked and there wasn't.

It's so sad when you PK and then it's just like the glue starts coming up. You're like, aw. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Ailey. Play ZM. From the panoramic ZM think tank, this is the top six. Well, howdy.

Today's top six deals with this situation at the supermarket where you let other people know that you're kind of keen for it. Apparently, this comes from star of The Bachelor Australia, Brittany Hockley. Oh, yeah. She said she wasn't super well aware of this, but she's on her podcast has talked about the different ways in the supermarket to let other people know you're keen. You know, the traditional

one of the bananas. Yep. Up in the trolley? Up. But also on the side, is it? Something like that. Like straddling the... I don't want to bruise my bananas straddling them on the trolley. Straddling their nose? It's the way of keeping the bananas out of harm's way. So nothing heavy falls on top of them. You can straddle them and that's what

my nan always did with the yoghurt pottles. Yes, oh my god, on the edge. Yeah, yeah. Put them on the bar so that they didn't get stomped or squashed. Yeah, in the middle. But she said there's other ways, like the bunch of bananas. There's this one apparently woman can do for men

is where you just pop a peach in his trolley. Peach? What if it's out of season? You're out of season, man. How expensive are peaches to just be tossing about? Yes, willy-nilly. What if this man doesn't notice and goes to the supermarket and then to the checkout and then it's $1.50?

And you bankrupt the guy. Yeah, for a single peach. That's the $1.50 he couldn't afford and now he can't pay his bills and now he's getting evicted from his flat. And you did that just because you wanted to shag him. Yeah. Now the upside down pineapple pops back into here.

Okay. This is sort of a universal sign for swingers, isn't it? Yeah, I didn't even know that was a thing. Oh, right. You put it on your door if you want to, if you're open to swinging. And if you get a shirt that's upside down pineapples, now that's the green spiky bit down. Yep. That's letting people know and that also

counts for the supermarket as well. Right. But all this is very expensive. It's expensive produce. Peaches, bananas, pineapples. We can't be afforded to play like that. So I've got the top six budget friendly ways to let other singles know that you're DTF. At the supermarket. At the supermarket. Okay. Number one, get a white loaf, a $1

white loaf and put the crust on your head like a hat. Yeah, DTF. Do you just open that in the supermarket? Yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. Pop that out and then put the, um, just the end bit, the crust, on your head like a little bread hat. And that's who's saying she's crustin'.

She's crustin' for a thruster. Ooh, yeah, baby. In the bread aisle. Number five on the list of the top six budget-friendly ways to let people know that you're DTF at the supermarket are a bag of macaroni elbows on your shoulder. Oh, okay. Great value for money in the macaroni elbows.

Yeah. You know. And you just perch a beer on your shoulder. Yeah. Oh, that'd be hard. Like a macaroni elbows. Yep. So, you know. And you just perch a bear on your shoulder. Yeah. Oh, that'd be hard. Like a macaroni parrot. Okay. You call that albonin.

Albonin. Yep. Macaroni albonin. Number four on the list of the top six budget-friendly ways to let other singles know you're DTF at the supermarket. A bottle of Dairydale milk in your back pocket. Oh, yum. It's a big pocket. Yeah, it's got to be a big pocket because Dairydale milk in your back pocket. Oh, yum. It's a big pocket.

Yeah, it's got to be a big pocket because Dairydale don't muck around, do they? It's value for money, that stuff. Oh, Dairydale. It's the same milk. It's the same milk. It all comes from the same cows. Yep, same animal, isn't it?

Yeah. Get into a bit of Dairydale. Number three on the list of the top six budget-friendly ways to let other singles know you're DTF at the supermarket. You know how she was dropping peaches. Yeah. Drop a $5 frozen pizza into somebody else's trolley. But it's got to be meat lovers.

Oh, yeah. Drop a frozen pizza in there. Haven't the frozen pizzas gone up? I saw people online the other day. Is that because the base is made from the wheat from your phone? Yeah, and everything, yeah. I saw some people online the other day saying frozen pizza. It's outrageous.

The last bastion of affordability. Yeah. The frozen pizza. So disappointing. Number two on the list of the top six budget-friendly ways to let other singles know you're DTF at the supermarket. Get a 20-cent paper bag, you know, when you're going to leave. Yep. Cut some eye holes in it and wear it around the supermarket.

Yeah, okay. Let them love your personality, you know. Yeah. Yeah. They can see your eyes. Your personality will shine through. It will shine through that paper bag. You have to scan it when you get back to the self-service checkout, though,

because that was 20 cents. Yep. And number one on the list of the top six budget-friendly ways to let other singles know you're DTF at the supermarket are stand at the muscle cabinet. You know the muscle cabinet? Yes. And press the stop water button

so no water's going onto the muscles. And then when someone hot walks past, go, ah, and then let the button go so the water starts going again. Wow. I think you're going to get trespassed from the supermarket if you do that. Ah.

Ah. That is today's top six. that. Ah. Ah. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. Shhh.

Shhh. Shhh. Shhh. That is today's top six. Play it. CDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Silly little pole.

Silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly Little Pole. Silly Little Pole. Silly Little Pole. Silly Little Pole. Today's Silly Little Pole. If you scan something at the supermarket

and it comes through cheaper than you expected or what the price had previously told you, do you tell the store? 92% of people said no. So do you know what yesterday, because you know I've got that supermarket with the narky checkouts with the, like they scan the fruit, and then if you've got the wrong fruit,

it narks on you at the end of your thing. I put in, I got some yellow kiwi fruits. Our favourite. The gold, the favourite. They're not yellow kiwi, golden. Well, they're yellow, they're not green. No, but no one calls them golden, the gold, the favourite. They're not yellow kiwifruits. Golden. Well, they're yellow. They're not green. No, but no one calls them golden.

They don't shimmer gold. They're called golden. No, they're more of a yellowy gold. They're more yellow than they're gold. They're more of a fluoro yellow than they are gold. I'm not debating the colour. He's wrong, but also they're yellow. I'm debating the title.

They're also yellow. So, and then I was like, oh my God, it's going to knock on me. I accidentally put in green kiwi fruit. Mankey. And then when I got the lady over to reverse it, and I put in gold kiwi fruit, they were like twice as much. Yeah. So, I actually just should have shut up and just.

Did it knock on you or did you admit it before? No, because I admitted it. I got the lady over because I'm a good citizen. What a good boy. I'm a good boy. What a good boy. I'm a good boy. Is it too far to say that he's an angel? Yeah.

An angel amongst us? Probably not. Not too far. Saint? Yeah. Saint? God himself? That's a miracle. I only need one more. And then I can be one of those. Canonised. A canonised. You can be canonised. What if God was one of us?

Could be. Scanning Kiwi fruit like one of us? Could be. Scanning Kiwi fruit like one of us. Doesn't have a car, catches the bus. Or a lambskull turtle. Okay, I think you've given Hayley a great idea for Hayley's version this Friday. Oh, absolutely. As Fletch and Angel. Yeah. Danielle says, would you say something for Scanmore?

Yes. No different to me. So she's on her high and mighty bloody ivory bed is all over there. Do you ever have that thing where it scans and you're like,

I swear this was less. Yeah. And then you're like, ugh. I do it. And sometimes if you say to them, can you check? Because this had like

a sale price on it. Yeah. They'll be like, oh yeah, that sign should have been taken down but they have to give you the price that it's marked at.

And then in the meantime, they've gone over... Did it seem like it's also getting a little bit of trouble for that? Yeah. For like things not scanning the same as the shelf. Yeah. It's false advertising. Yeah, there was enough for people to be like, this is happening more than it should.

This is like a digital system. Hannah said if it scans at the cheaper price, then I would take that as, take that as the intended price, and the display just has not been updated. Oh, okay, yeah, fair call. But if the display says cheaper than the scanned, you bet I'll be telling the store.

So there you go. Michael, depends on the store personally. Supermarkets and big stores like that, I would not tell them. Smaller shops, I would for sure. Yeah, same. Can I just, Michael Trotter, hero of a small business. He's an angel. He's a, what if God was one of us?

Although I do remember when I was like 15 or 16, I was buying some cricket gloves from the local sports store. Oh, RIP, the local sports store. RIP, the local sports store. And I think they missed a digit. I think they were meant to be like 68 or 80 something and they charged me like $7.69

instead of like 87 or 77. Can we just have a moment of remembrance for the small sports stores? Things called like Thompson's Rackets and Bats. Like when sports stores had a surname in the title. Oh, we miss them, don't we? Anderson's Rackets and bats. Yes. When sports stores had a surname in the title. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, we miss them, don't we?

Anderson's rackets and bats. Yes. McMurray's gloves and socks. Oh, you've missed gloves and socks. Very confusing

sports store, that one. Yep. Smith, shuttlecocks and tenpins. You've gone very specific. What do you mean? You've both been very specific. No one has gone Smith, shuttlecocks and tenpins. You've gone very specific. What do you mean? You've both gone very specific. No one has called Smith shuttlecocks and tenpins.

No one buys tenpins. The tenpins are at the place. They sell tenpins to the bowling alley. They usually do. And they sell shuttlecocks to the badminton players. Just like Janice's tees and karate belts. Golf tees and karate belts. They don't sell any. Barry's karate belts. Golf tees and karate belts. No.

Barry's balls and bits. No, that's a different shot, mate. Barry's balls and bits really, when Rebel Sport came to town, they pivoted. Yeah, they did. Barry's better than ever. God, I tell you what, Rebel Sport and those big chains really destroyed. Off a shame. Yeah. Speaking of which, have you been to Costco yet?

No. Speaking of the destruction of small business? No, but I'm shame. Yeah. Speaking of which, have you been to Costco yet? No. Speaking of the destruction of small business? No, but I'm keen. Okay. Rhiannon says, no, but I'll take the win. No, I won't tell them I'll take the win, but if it scans higher, then yes, I will be alluding them to it. Unless it's a small business effort. Yeah, like Barry's, Shuttlecock's and Tenpins.

You've got to tell them. Oh, I miss that store. Always had a good sale rack. You know? Fifty dollars and under. For shuttlecocks and ten pins. Yeah. Great repeat business too.

Because you're always going back in for more pins. You are. Kids, where's your puncher? I found ten I found eight of my ten pins. You bloody kids, stop touching my pins. Dad, you're just bowling on the driveway. Enough of that. Enough of that.

Tallulah says, you've got to take the rear winds when it comes to bargains. Tallulah from? Tallulah do the hula from Hawaii. Yep. Rose, as someone who's worked in retail, no, because it's annoying when people tell me because then I have to do something about it. Please keep your thoughts to yourself. Yeah, take the win and run.

Tash, if it's majorly wrong, like it scans at $8 instead of $80 or it was a cashier error, then a yes, but not if it's a small amount. Oh, like back in the days of cash money and people would give you back the wrong change by a lot. Yeah. There's always that pause where you go i no no not today she should be concentrating not today so overwhelmingly yeah 90 odd percent of new zealanders won't say a thing keeping it hush hush i was filming something down in Christchurch this weekend

and after a long day of filming, we went to the airport and we were sitting there. This is maybe, yeah, we were sitting there and there was a big, a massive group of school kids. Oh yeah. And shout out to the Auckland ice hockey kids that I met at the Christchurch airport yesterday. Right.

There were like 70 of them. God, that would have been some oversized luggage. Oh my God, yes. And we had all of our filming stuff, so we were like racing to beat them to the oversized check-in. And we did. Eat my dust, kids. Anyway, so they were all in this group

and we were sitting at this table having some lunch, which I'll talk about later. Yeah. Okay. Right, so they were all in this group and we were sitting at this table having some lunch and which I'll talk about later. Yeah, okay. Right, okay. That's a little tease for later that I was eating amongst the people. Right. And I was eating my lunch and these kids were like, they were a ruckus. They were loud. I mean, there were

so many of them. Were they ice hockey players? Were they punching each other? Ripping each other's helmets off? No, they were playing. There's a giant chess set there and they were sort of throwing's helmets off, giving each other a boof. No, they were playing. There's a giant chess set there and they were sort of throwing the pieces around. Oh, they were good bastards. No, they were good fun. They were good fun, these kids.

Well, until they break something. And then there were a lot of exhausted dads and a couple of exhausted mums around as well who were just like, ugh. But they did have bronze medals around their necks.

Okay. So congratulations. Who's got gold? I don't know. Probably the Canadian Mighty Ducks, I reckon. Yeah, probably the Mighty Ducks. Who's got gold? I don't know. Probably the Canadian Mighty Ducks, I reckon. Yeah, probably the Mighty Ducks.

It's the only other team I know. Anyway, so at one point, we had this camera sitting on the desk and they're like big film cameras. They're quite fascinating. And one kid came up

and he was like, what's that? What do you reckon? Dickhead? I hope you heard of that. Hey, hey. I hope you heard of that. Hey, he was not a dickhead. Anyway, he goes, what's that?

We said, it's a camera. He said, what are you filming? We said, oh, we've been filming an ad. And he goes, oh, yeah, what for? And we told him, do-do-do-do-do, stay tuned. And then he looked at me and he was like, I know you. And I was like, yeah. I hate an overconfident child.

I hate him. I hate him. That would have been you, wouldn't it? No, I was pretty shy.. I hate an overconfident child. I hate him. I hate him. That would have been you, wouldn't it? No, I was pretty shy. You would have liked him. He was like this while he was talking to me. He had his hands out like this. And one hand was a bunch of Doritos and the other was a bunch of Burger Rings.

And he was literally going like, one. Oh, so they weren't in a bag. He just had a greasy handful of orange corn snacks. It was really sweet. And then he was like, I know you. And I said, do you? And he said, you're on the TV. And I said, yes, I am.

And then another girl joined him and was like, oh, my God, you're from the Great Kiwi Bake Off. And I said, yes, I am. And she said, I'm a huge fan. And then suddenly, you know, everyone caught wind and we were swarmed by these children. I mean, I can see why your celebrity status is going to your head. Oh, absolutely. And, of course, I wasn't in the Kauri Lounge,

which we will talk about later. Right. I want to come back to that. You're a woman of the people. I'm a woman of the people. After this, I don't think she's going to ever go in the Kauri Lounge again because no one makes a fuss in the lounge. No one makes a fuss in the lounge.

Everyone's famous in the lounge. Yeah. Out with the people. Call me Lady Diana. You know what I mean? You're out there clearing landmines with Mother Teresa,

I assume she's also there. Just blessing children. Yeah. Blessing children. Kissing them on the foreheads. And then, so a swarm started and then one girl

was truly a Bake Off fan. She was saying, oh my God, you know, I hated when Kihei left. She was my favourite. Well, you know, what happened to Madeline left. She was my favourite. Well, you know, what happened to Madeline Sami? And all these things. And it was really lovely.

And she said, can I get my dad to take a photo of us? And I said, absolutely. No problem. I was looking good as well because I'd just been filming all day. And then so the dad took a photo with me and then they kept chatting, kept chatting. And I was trying to get my dad. And eventually my producer who was next to me, who I just want to sort of preface,

and producers, I say this proudly, she's an absolute nobody. Right. You know what I mean? She's just a producer. You're right. Not like you. The children aren't there to talk to her

about television production. No, exactly. Yeah, so she said, maybe it's time to go back to mum and dad. I mean, I wouldn't have the audacity. I was charming the children. Someone's got to be the bad guy, though. They left.

Anyway, and then Aaron calls me on the phone, and so I was talking to him, da-da-da-da, and then this really, like, young, small, shy girl came up, and as I was talking to Aaron, I heard her say, I'm a really big fan. And then she was talking to the producer, and the producer goes, oh, look, Hayley's just on the phone at the moment,

and she goes, oh, and she had this terrible look on the phone at the moment. And she goes, oh. And she had this terrible look on her face. She was devastated. Doesn't get to meet her idol. You know? I'm not going to withhold that from this poor child who wants nothing more than to meet Hayley Sproul from the Great Kiwi Bake Off. So I said to Aaron, quite loudly as well,

so the producer knew what a hero I was, I said, oh, look, babe, this poor, sad, young child. This pathetic, this pathetic nobody child, really. The look on her face. I can't. Disgusting. Babe, I'll call you back in a second. I'm just going to go have a photo with a child who's dying to meet me.

Anyway, I hang up the phone and I sort of give myself a zhuzh and I walked over to the girl who was now sitting sort of like slumped on the chair like this, sad, next to her father. And I said, hi, darling, do you want to have a photo with me? And she looked at me sort of confused and was like, yeah, but also with her and pointed to the producer. And I was like, OK. And so I went and got our producer, Megan, and I said, oh, the kid wants to have a photo with you as well. And Megan was like, surely not. And then the kid came to have a photo with you as well and Megan was like

surely not and then the kid came in to like came over to where we were and she put her hand immediately around the producer and not me and I said then I sort of slipped into the photo and put my hand over the kid and was like well I'm the celebrity here right this is the money shot that we wanted to get in this photo. And they took the photo and as the kid walked away, she didn't say goodbye to me. She sort of looked at the producer and smiled and walked away. And I think... I think she just caught wind that

there was a famous person sitting over there. She looked over to the table, saw two women and picked Megan, the producer, as being the famous one. Because she looks more TV? Maybe. And then I was an absolutely nobody. So now she's got this photo of this Hayley character who just assumed that I was the one she wanted a photo with, but I don't think she wanted a photo with me.

She didn't want a photo with you. And now she's going to be so disappointed that, oh, this me, Miss Sproul, has ruined her photo with my producer. Who she thought was on TV. Who she thought was on TV. So, yeah, a little bit of all this. Well, that was humbling, wasn't it? I want to see a photo of this Megan.

She sounds like a real go-getter. She sounds like a real future star. Oh, look, she's got a face for television. I'll say that. Yeah, right. I'm the celebrity. She's a behind-the-scenes woman. Humbling.

Really humbling. Really humbling. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I'm going to preface this by saying, look, I'm a feminist. But sometimes, sometimes. That sounds like a, I'm not a racist, but.

Yeah, it's a little bit, I'm a feminist, but. Look, I'm a feminist. Over the weekend, two female protesters, I think they just did an absolute shambles of a job. They were at the Metropolitan Museum where a very famous Van Gogh. It's the flowers. The flowers in the vase. The sunflowers.

It's a bit of, it's messy. I don't like it. I thought it was best work. I wasted, how many hours did I waste at Amsterdam going to the Van Gogh Museum? It's too many. I didn't recognise any of them. Well, anyway, they performed a protest, let's say. Security.

Security. Security. So here's my issue with their protests. Security! Security! Security! So here's my issue with their protests. I'm all for a good protest. One, what did Van Gogh do? You know? Took his ear off. Yeah, exactly.

He's not doing anything wrong. He would never have got away with sending an ear to a girlfriend in the modern climate. Can you imagine that? It'd be cancelled. It's pesty. Here's my ear! Man, it's absolutely roasted online. climate. Can you imagine that? They'd be cancelled. It's pesty. Here's my ear! It's absolutely roasted online.

They'd be pesty. The thing I have, the issue I take with this. So what do they do? What we're hearing in that audio there is them getting a tin of Heinz tomato soup. Yeah. Not even Campbell's. Heinz tomato soup and throwing it over the Van Gogh painting.

Which is then you hear the tin dropping. And then you hear security. What were they protesting? Sunflowers. So here's the thing. So you've got Van Gogh. Then we've got a tin of soup. Yep.

Then they've got t-shirts saying just stop oil. Okay. Then they put glue on their hands and they glue themselves to the wall what kind of glue do they use i bet it was pv a bit of pva no no it looks like bloody gorilla glue oh don't put that oh no you'll never get that off and then they said what is worth more art or life is it worth more than food worth more than justice than justice? I'm already confused. We're about food. We're about justice, art. Are you more concerned about the protection of a painting

than the protection of our planet? Okay. So now we're at climate. Just stop oil. Soup. The cost of living crisis is part of the cost of oil crisis. Which one is it? Which one are we protesting here, gals?

Right, so you're more upset with the fact their messaging's all over the place. Yeah, fuel is unaffordable to millions of cold families. What's with the soup and the Van Gogh thing? And the glue to the wall? Keep it simple, stupid. Keep it simple, stupid. One idea per protest.

I mean, they've got great points on all of those things. I know, but I think instead of... You're not saying that they don't have great points. Oh, no. All right, Russell Norman, come on. I think the message would have been clearer with some placards. Right. And less glue and less soup.

Right. Less glue, less soup. Do you know what I mean? That's her feedback. Girls, well done. And I appreciate your passion. Right. In future, I say placards with a clear message on them.

Less glue, less soup. Do you think if maybe someone's wanting to chain themselves to an oil rig or a shipping tanker or a service station, they should maybe run their plans past you just for a... Yeah, but I'll go if you oil... If you chain yourself to an oil rig, for me, the message is clear. Yeah.

If you're chucking soup at a Van Gogh wearing a stop oil T-shirt, then you glue yourself to the wall and then you talk about the cost of living and how people can't afford petrol. I'm confused. You're all over the place. I'm really confused.

Less soup. The soup's really done it for me. Because wouldn't you have been better to glue yourself to a supermarket or a service station or a politician's house? Or a whale. But if it's about the cost of living and then stop oil. I don't know. Just stop oil.

But then how's the stuff going to get to the supermarket? It's even got electric trucks yet. Exactly. So they're like, people are hungry, but just stop oil. They'll be even hungrier though if they stop the oil. If we've got no oil. Yeah. And what's with the glue to the wall?

I don't know. Did the glue work? Or did the security? What's the van go message? Is the van go okay? Surely that's behind it. It's fine. It's got glass over it.

Oh, right. There's a little bit. So they've been charged, right, for aggressive trespassing and damage to something because the frame's slightly damaged. But the frame's not original. It's fine. Right. Okay.

But they said that they've pled not guilty, even though they've actively done it and it's all filmed. Yeah. Because they were like, no, what they've been charged for is like intent to damage something, you know, something property. But they were like, no, they know that there's glass on it. So in that, you know, you're not even doing anything with the soup. Less soup.

That's my final statement. Your big heart. Less soup. No, yeah, drop the soup. It's sloppy work. Sloppy soup. Yeah, sloppy soup drop the soap. It's sloppy work. Sloppy soup. Yeah, sloppy soup, sloppy work. So the journey continues.

I was in Christchurch this weekend, as I've been mentioning this whole show. I mentioned it more than I've mentioned the fact that I went to Bali. I don't know if you have, actually. They do call Christchurch Bali of the South, don't they? They do, yeah. And for good reason.

It was a balmy day. Anyway, we're working down there and we got to the airport and I was with four people. No, I was with three. We were a group of four. And I mentioned this morning to you guys that I was having some lunch and I was talking to these kids, right? And you said, why weren't you in the Kauru Lounge?

Because we have a Kauru membership through work. Very lucky, aren't we? We're very lucky and I enjoy it. It's another world. It's another world. It's another. Another world. Another world.

And I was gagging for a wine as well. Free wine, free muffins. Oh, my God. Free cheese. And the chutney, that was gagging for a wine as well. Free wine, free muffins. Oh my God, free cheese. And the chutney, that's been around for a hot minute. Spicy chutney's not bad. Yeah, that's not bad. Anyway, but I didn't go into the lounge because the three people I was with didn't have koru.

And when I mentioned this to you, and this is why I wasn't digging for it, you said I would have just gone in myself and left them out there. 100% I would have. To starve. There's free wine. There's free muffins. Yeah, I know.

There's free coffee and biscuits. But I couldn't do it. I'm a woman of the people. I stayed out with my people. The story you told before about meeting the young children, that was Princess Diana. This is further Princess Diana. You are indeed, I think, the people's princess. I'm not going to leave these people out in the young children. That was Princess Diana. This is further Princess Diana. You are indeed, I think, the people's princess.

I'm not going to leave these people out in the trenches. I would have put a Fergie and just gone into the lounge. Yeah, I know you would have, but I didn't. I stayed humble and I stayed out and I paid for a sandwich. So you just wanted to get on air and say you're a woman of the people because you turned down free wine. I wasn't going to bring this up. Right. I think maybe, was it you

Vaughn or was it you Fletch who said you're a hero? Oh my gosh, you're a hero. Hayley, we must tell the people. I can't remember which one it was. No, it wasn't me. I might have said it but it was probably quite sarcastic. You would have left people, I would have said, draw straws, one person gets to come with me. Because you're allowed one guest.

But that's terrible because then you're leaving two people out there. But also you don't really know these people. Was there a soundie there? Yeah. Leave the soundie. No. Leave the soundie. Leave the soundie and the cameraman, take the producer.

No, I simply couldn't. And then I thought about doing that thing where I went into the lounge. And smuggled them out muffins. Smuggled them out some muffins and some crackers and stuff. Against the rules. Against the rules. And I don't want to risk my corporate Kauru membership. Yeah, don't want to get work in trouble.

These people that, as you say, I don't really know. But I, you know, I just, I stayed out with them and I paid $12 for a panini. And, you know, I don't want any praise for it. And I know you're probably the text machines going, no. Yeah, there it is. Woman of the people. Yes. I know I do it.

I do it for the people. Oh, you're getting emotional now. Yeah. And just for me, you know, it's about connecting with people in these times. Yeah. And I wanted to be out there swarmed by children and eating this sort of cold. Overly confident children. If you've got an overly confident child, maybe just pull them back.

No, I was an overly confident child. This may shock you. Look what you've got on your hands. They'll come around there. She's claiming she's a hero because she didn't go into a lounge. I heard about this and I think this is a fashion alert. A fashion alert. A trend alert. A fashion alert. A trend alert.

A trend alert. Trend alert. Trend alert. Producer Jared told me he was going to be doing this. This was his plans for later in the day after I was talking to him. But he was going to be dyeing his partner's hair. Wow. Trusted.

Quite nerve wracking for me because I've never dyed my hair, let alone anyone else's. Anyone else's hair, yeah. She has quite a lot of hair, so I was worried I'd miss a patch. Wow, you really had to rub that into the three people in this studio's face, Jared, that she's got a lot of hair. You know that is something that the three of us struggle with. Carry on.

Heartfelt apology. Thank you. Yeah, I did it. I did a pretty good job, I reckon. There were no mis-coloured bits and nothing fell out and it was looking good. Those are the markers of a good dye job. No mis-coloured bits and nothing fell out.

What colour here? This is the trend alert. This is the trend alert. Copper. Oh. I've heard you saying you want to go copper. I'm going to do this. Is this what everybody's doing at the moment?

Well, I don't know. A natural redhead Anna, how do you feel about this? It's flattering, actually. Yeah. I would say a trailblazer. I was going to say it's appropriation. Do you reckon? Ginge appropriation.

Ginge appropriation. What if you call someone a ginger or a wrangler and they're not? Well, you shouldn't be calling anybody a ginger or a wranger anyway. We're not allowed to use wranger anymore. No. But the eyebrows will be the telling. I'm so sorry, and every morning she walks in to do our planning meeting and I say, what up, wranger?

Jesus. You've got to stop that. I know, I'm so sorry. Copper here. Copper here, yeah. Okay. The eyebrows are going to be the tell. The eyebrows are going to be out Copper hair. Copper hair, yeah. Okay. The eyebrows are going to be the tell. The eyebrows are going to be out.

Yeah, especially mine. Look at these whoppers. Is this like a celebrity thing? A celebrity's doing this? Well, Kendall Jenner did it for Gucci, Chanel, Prada. Thank you. We can't compare ourselves to Kendall Jenner, guys. What looks good on Kendall Jenner isn't going to look good on those of us.

That's what I'm thinking. Between these two. She wears those togs that are like a string around the top with a little curtain. I tried those on and my balls were hanging out. Not only your balls. Everything. It was very little fit behind the curtain, actually. That's very much like a Florence in the Machine orange.

Does it look good, Jared? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's a lovely tone. It's not like red. I mean, red's fine, but it's not like crimson. Oh, okay. She had dark colour.

Now it's like a copper, surprisingly. It's nice. Copper really shines through on people with blonde or light brunette hair She had dark colour, now it's like a copper, surprisingly. It's nice. Copper really shines through on people with blonde or light brunette hair because these shades have a lighter base, which looks beautiful when layered with warmish red tones found in copper. As a general rule of thumb, olive to dark complexions can benefit from darker shades. I see I'm olive, but I'm quite pale.

But summer's coming. I thought about just having some summer fun while I'm off air. Well, I'm not on TV at the moment. Yeah, right. Just go orange. Are we all on board with this? Me doing this? Do they not? They cop it. Anna, very silent on this. Do you not remember when I

dyed my hair? I was blonde when I first started working at TVNZ and then I dyed my hair brown for a job at MediaWorks because I'm a real network sleep arounder. Wow, aren't you? And then when I came back, they were like you've got to dye it back to blonde. And I was like, okay, so I did. And then I dyed it brown for...

And they had an absolute mirror about her. Right. So now I've been established as a brunette for a while. I mean, I don't think TVNZ is in any place to ask a woman to dye her hair a different colour at the moment. No. Kamal Santamaria! You want to move on, do you?

You don't want to linger on that one for too long, do you, Fletch? You don't want to dip your toe in a bit of defamation on a Monday. Well, look, I just think this is the time of my life to have red hair. And actually, I've been inspired by Emma and Jarrett. I think you need to ask Anna, though, as the... As a resident wranger. Yeah. Resi wranger.

Okay. How does a reszy ranger. Okay. How does a Rizzy ranger feel about this? Who's your favourite today? Because this isn't going to last for long. I haven't said it once. Slim picking today. That's because you've got a bit of ranger in your beard. I can't believe you're saying this to us.

Guys, we've got to drop ranger. It's not working for any of us. I've never used ranger in my life. I'm just jumping on board because I'm having fun. Yeah. No, you can die your hair. I'm happy for you to do that. I'm just jumping on board because I'm having fun. Yeah, no, you can dye your hair. I'm happy for you to do that.

I'm encouraging it and I think you would look great. I just can't believe that, Jared, you nailed this. I did just, I was so proud of myself. I think we need to have more faith in the salon of our partners. Do you remember over lockdown,

I actually live streamed it. Aaron waxed my mustache with hard wax. With hard wax. With hard wax. We melted it and then I slathered it on and I couldn't get it off. And I was like, Aaron.

And he had to come and like taut my flappy face and rip it off. He did an all right job. I'm not trusted with anything other than doing up a necklace. No. Can you do up this necklace for me? And even that takes a while because of my big clumsy fingers. Yeah, you're a buffoon. But I've got,

if you're going to get laser on anything, you've got to shave prior. How the hell do you shave your own back? So I've had Shadow do that. That must be the most disgusting thing in the world.

Oh look, I'll tell you what, it's not romantic. And you're standing under the shower and she's like rinsing off the razor and another one. Rinse this one off

and pass me another one. You're like, I'm so sorry about this. Oh, gosh. So we... Sorry. We wanted to take some calls and texts this morning

on this. When your partner has stepped in and been the beautician. Yeah. Maybe that, maybe, I know with a lot

of pregnant women, you know, when you stop being able to reach your feet because your belly's in the way, the partner's got to jump on the toes.

Do what to the toes? Clip them and paint them and... Well, that's what professionals are for, isn't it? What, are you going to have nine months of just having manky long toes? You don't want to be going to a professional pregnant. Those fumes are bloody... Yeah, no, no. They'll be growing a third limb.

The kid will never be able to do maths. Yeah. Basic or otherwise. We want to take your call. When has your partner had to step in and be the beautician? Maybe they help you regularly with something. Maybe they did such a great job at it that you're like, well, I'll just get you to do this for me.

Because wasn't this like, was it Emily Blunt? Or a celebrity couple, I'm sure. Oh, no, Ryan Reynolds and old, what's his name? Blake Lively. McGee. He died here over lockdown. But do you think there'd be a partner that trusts their boyfriend or husband

with a Brazilian? Far out. I mean, no one knows the area better. Yeah, but then maybe you have trusted them and it went wrong. This is what I mean. Like, successful or unsuccessful, we want to know.

0800 DALES at MSN number 9696. Give us a call now when your partner's had to step in and be the beautician. Good or bad story, ZM? Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Well, producer Jared did an absolute great job changing the middy's hair from dark brown to copper.

Paving the way for people like myself that have been toying with the idea. To go copper. Yeah, and then that reminded me of the time that Aaron had to wax my moustache off in lockdown, and now we're asking you when your partner had to step up into the role of beautician. Zoe, how did your partner help you? He actually wanted to have a go at giving me a brazzy. Oh, babe!

A brazzy. Oh, no. Okay, talk us through it. It wasn't good. I said yes initially because I was like, yeah, you're a precise man. You'll be all good. And he put a strip on and then it backed out massively. I couldn't do it.

And then I couldn't do it to myself. Oh, no, so it was just stuck there. No, I just couldn't do it to myself. Oh, no, so it was just stuck there. So I just couldn't do it. I was like, nah, I backed out, even trusting myself doing it. Oh. Yeah, and then so I went back and was like,

okay, you're going to have to do it, and just had to amp it up, and he ripped it off, and that was that. I couldn't do any more. So you just had one strip? Yeah. Jeepers. Did you go and get it sorted just had one strip? Yeah. Jeepers. Did you go and get it sorted out by a professional?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We got it sorted out. I bet they see people with strips come in all the time. Being like one hair-free strip going, you chickened out, didn't you? Yeah. I tried. I'd actually just let it grow up, grow out, so that you didn't have to go in and be all embarrassed. About the strap?

Yeah. I'd just smother it in near. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no. Near your depilatory cream, right? Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Zoe, thanks for your call. Anonymous, we need a partner to help you out.

Good morning. Anonymous. Oh, sorry. That was me. That is you. I was having a nap Anonymous. Oh, sorry. That was me. That is you. I was having an apple porridge. Oh, yeah.

And what have you got on your porridge? Plain porridge? Yeah, a bit of the old plain porridge. Oh, you don't add anything. Oh, so part of the story. I'm quite heavily pregnant. Oh, okay. So yeah, no, just plain porridge.

Well, I would normally have booze in there, do you? Oh, God. Booze and raw salmon. Well, you've got a bit of the Chinese. Oh, God, no, just plain porridge. I would normally have booze in there, do you? Oh, God. Booze and raw salmon. Well, you've got a bit of the Chinese. Oh, God, I've got a rose to go good about now. Yeah, right. Okay, so how did your partner help you out last night then? So I'm quite heavily pregnant, and the big date's sort of not too far away, and I've been a bit scared to go in and get a wax because, you know,

you don't really know what's happening down there. You can't see too much anymore. Yeah. So last night, my partner fronted up and he shaved me for me. And he did the best job ever. Gave you a bloody shave, did he? He did. He did.

And he did a great job. Really good job. I was proud of him. It was a better job than what I would have done too. That's trust, eh? Gee. You don't want to do a great job, though, because he's going to have to do this every time now, isn't he?

No, I don't know too much about that. I think I'll be able to do that. Okay. Did he give you some aloe vera afterwards, you know, on the area? He actually asked afterwards. He was like, so do I need to moisturise you now? What do I need to do? What a horny, that's horny, that? What a horn dog. That's horny.

That's horny carry on. That's horny carry on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We won't talk about the moisturizer yet, but no, he did a great job. Oh, my goodness. Amazing. Did you enjoy your plain porridge there, you old horn dog? Horn dog.

Thanks for your call. Sheila, how did your husband help you? Well, I don't think I can follow that story, but I did a waxing course and i helped him i had to practice it was only a one-day course and i he's quite a hairy man and i was like can i do your back your chest your shoulders no no no eventually he caved in and said i could wax his butt cheek so on goes the wax and i thought that's not enough on goes a little bit more put the paper strip on it and ripped it off there was a real good ripping sound but the paper

had just ripped off one layer of wax and the wax was still stuck to his bum so he's then screeching in pain because he's a big girl the The dog was barking and running around in circles and my daughter was four at the time and she's screaming, don't, you're hurting my daddy. Stop it, stop it. So after all that, he decided he would soak it off in the bath, but there was so much wax on his bum that he stuck to the bath. Because it got hot again.

Yeah, so I've not been allowed to do it ever since. Fair enough, I think. Your band, amazing. I think so. Sheila, thanks for your call. Ask the messages in. Someone said my wife wanted to wax the downstairs

with the wax in the tube. She freaked out when I tried to pull it. She closed her legs and glued her cheeks together. She glued herself. Glued herself shut. I waxed my at-the-time boyfriend's inner bum cheek She glued herself Oh She glued herself sharp Jesus

I waxed my At the time boyfriend's Inner bum cheek Because he was too nervous To go to the beautician And he had a really hairy ass Oh yeah Inner bum cheek

Call it what it is It's the crack Yeah I did such a great job He said his favourite part was How few wipes he needed After a poo nap Oh my goodness

He doesn't get the dags Oh my god Years and years't get the dags. Oh my God, years and he's dagging himself. One wife takes care of it all. It's silky soft down there. Wow. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day is about jelly babies. You know jelly babies, the lolly?

Yeah. Guess what they were called before they were officially known as jelly babies. Little squishy bubblesbbers. Squishy babies. Squishy babies, no. Soft newborns. Edible newborns. Almost.

Really? Almost as bad. Really, what? They were called unclaimed babies. Oh my God. Okay. So you would buy unclaimed babies and eat them. Like how weird is that?

That's weird. That's bizarre. Apparently it was just not even really talked about that it was like bad. But unclaimed babies were just what they were known as. And you'd go into the store because they were always in a jar and you'd be like, four unclaimed babies, please. Oh, my gosh. Wow.

Yeah, and they'd put them in a little paper bag for you and you'd nom, nom, nom, nom. You'd take them away. You'd eat them. Some people started calling them jellied. Jellied babies. And then after that, jelly babies. And jelly babies stuck.

And they think it's because George Harrison once referred to them as jelly babies. Oh, okay. Jelly babies. Jelly babies. George Harrison of Beatles fame. Is that your George Harrison? Jelly babies. Jelly babies. Jelly babies? Yeah, jelly babies. George Harrison of Beatles fame. Is that your George Harrison? Jelly babies. Oh, once me a bugger, jelly babies.

Yeah. And apparently Doctor Who, one of the early Doctor Who, Tom Baker's Doctor Who, loved a handful of jelly babies and because of the popularity of Doctor Who, it became very, very popular. Right. They're not that popular in New Zealand anymore, jelly babies. I think we've moved to gummy bears.

Gummy bears. Gummy bears. Yeah. I think gummy bears. We've moved to gummy bears. Gummy bears. Gummy bears. Yeah. Just a little warning. Don't go for a whole bag of those Haribo gummy jelly beers. Why? Poop yourself.

Diuretic. Oh, yeah, okay. Big diuretic energy. Have they got sweetener in them rather than sugar? Yeah, yeah. Oh, dear. And just hoons.

I've done that before. That Double D's brand, the sugar-free. Oh, yeah. You know when you're like I've done that before, that Double D's brand, the sugar-free. Oh, yeah. You know, when you're like, I want to diet, but I feel like some sweats. Yeah. I reckon the reason they work when you're on a diet is because you cack yourself. Yeah, because they just hoon straight through you. Yeah.

It's diuretic. So today's fact of the day is before they were called jelly babies, they were called unclaimed babies. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. With a like us, you are trying to purge a year's worth of terrible food and booze.

Two years worth of pandemic food and booze. Three years worth of, yeah, pandemic lifestyle changes, like the amount we're drinking, eating, the lack of exercise. Or you're just trying to do something positive like

quit smoking maybe or spend less time on your phone. My word to you, don't bother. Okay. Because it's not going to stick. You might as well not try in the first place. Wow, that's a very defeatist attitude. Cue the next song.

No, but according to, they did a study in Britain and they say on average, the average person gives up on positive lifestyle changes after seven weeks. That's the kind of golden number, the most we can sort of stick to something. Is that because if you say it's fitness or whatever, after seven weeks, you're kind of back to where you want to be?

Maybe, but then... And then you decide, oh, well, now I can just have fun. Yeah, I know, these things aren't supposed to last forever. I feel like that's my, like, loop. 21% can only keep a positive new habit for a month max. Because what's the amount of time to form a habit? Isn't it three weeks? Three weeks.

Yeah, so three weeks of, like, if you gym or quitting smoking. I remember a few years ago I was having terrible gut health issues. So glad I've sorted that out. Not. Anyway, but the way I was trying to get rid of it was the low FODMAP diet. You know that diet where it's like you can't eat a whole bunch. My God, Vaughan Smith, you have found your light. Yeah, the sun's

pushing you. He's got some morning light in those eyes. I think your new habit is your skincare routine, sir. What is that? Do I need work? No, it's beautiful. Oh, okay. Thank you. I use soap. Anyway, but I had to do this. It's really popping those freckles on your cheeks. I got sick of

the face wash, so I just body washed all the way over my face. You are so terrible at compliments. Jeez, that sun's really popping your freckles. I like my freckles. Yeah, he likes his freckles. They're cute. Anyway, I had to do this diet, right?

And it was like so restrictive, the food that I was able to eat to try to sort my stomach out. And then the doctors said to me, three weeks, you've just got to make it to that three week mark. And actually I lasted seven weeks. And then you were like, boom, give up. On the dot, I like couldn't do it anymore.

Right. Does it say why people only last seven weeks? We just get bored? Yeah, it's basically just bored. And changing habits is really, really hard, especially long habits, like habits you've had for ages. Like smoke. I mean, smoke, it's got a whole different thing to it, doesn't it?

The addictive element. It looks cool. Oh, what? It's cool. Yeah, it's so cool. Yeah, it's so cool. Yeah, it's so cool. God, analog smokers,

eh? It's crazy when you see them. I know. You know what's weird? It's smelling them. Yeah. I was on a lift the other day with somebody

and that was fresh off a dart and I think it was a menthol and I was like, I couldn't help, I breathed in and I was like, which sounded like one of those passive aggressive ways

of letting people know that they smell. Oh God, my mum does that. Anytime, if we're outside at know that they smell. Oh, God, my mum does that. Any time if we're outside at a cafe or something, someone's smoking, my mum... Oh, God, it would have been nice to be sitting outside. With some fresh air.

Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. There is a Sydney mum who's caused quite a stir online. She's an influencer. I don't know what her reach is, but her name's Indie Clinton. And she's got a bebe and she was very pregnant with another one. And it was her induction day

because it was late. Oh yeah, that's when they make it happen. She gets a Hollywood Walk of Fame. Yeah, she's inducted into the Hall of Fame. They make it happen, right? Oh yeah, she's got like a quarter of a million followers on Instagram. What's her vibe? Give me, I want three different adjectives to describe her vibe.

Sydney. Yeah. You've painted a picture with one word there. Sydney. White, white, Sydney. White, blonde. Blonde. You can now pick that.

Lips. Lips. Yep. Is my other one. Right. But hey, I'm not, I'm not judging her appearance choices. It certainly sounds like you are. Look, it's not for me. It's not for you, sure.

It's not for me. I like a nice, tight, thin lip. Not a little bit weird. Look, it's not for me. It's not for you, sure. It's not for me. I like a nice, tight, thin lip. Not a big plumper. Not a plumper in the way. Anyway, so it was her induction that night. Yeah. And she shared on TikTok and her Instagram her getting ready to head to the hospital

to give birth to this baby. And what she did was she gave herself a mani-pedi, gave herself a blowout and styled her hair, a nice tousled wave, beach wave, you know, not too formal. She gave herself a coat of fake tan, let herself marinate for an hour and then had a shower, washed it out. Gave herself a full face of makeup before she headed to the hospital.

And people were like, what message is this? But then, I mean, yeah, this is it. Hang on. Because she's free to do whatever she wants, right? Who cares? Oh my God, absolutely. And you also, you want to look great, right? You want to feel good and look great.

She's probably having a photographer there. You want to feel great. Yes, you have a photographer there. You want to feel great. You want to look great. I think it was the message because she said like, by the way, my induction is happening. Why am I fake tanning for labour? Do I want to look

ugly when I'm pushing out a child? And I think that's what everyone was like. It's not about that. Yeah, that's the wrong word. But then when I read this this morning, I was like, well, my mum, right? So my brother's birthday is the 7th of October, mine's the 8th. But we're three years apart. So my brother

was having his third birthday party and my mum was deeply, deeply pregnant and I was late. And then the party wrapped up and my dad went to bed exhausted looking after children all day and my mum felt the beginnings of labour kick in.

So before she woke up my dad to go to the hospital she had a glass of champagne and then jumped in the shower and shaved her legs. So there was that still there. She shaved her legs? They're like deeply pregnant with me. I was like bending over in the shower, like hacking at her legs very quickly,

like yelling at my dad, like, get up, it's happening. But then, yeah, she didn't want everybody seeing her hairy legs. Because like, you know, sometimes depending on your position, your choice, they're up. Yeah. And people are touching them and whatnot. So yeah, my mum had a quick little shave. We've really brushed over the champagne there, haven't we?

I reckon this is why I love champagne. I got a whiff of it when I was coming out the womb. Because that's why I like peaches. Because your mum loved peaches. Because my mum loved peaches when she was pregnant with me. Yeah. I mean, we all love, everyone loves peaches. I don't think it's that wild.

Some of my guys, I love. Crazy boy. I love licking cold water surf or anything like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, that's not bad, but yeah. But this, I want to know what you, what was the thing that you did just before labour or just before you gave birth that maybe was a little out of the box that maybe made you feel a bit better.

If you've got an induction date set and you've got in mind how you want it all to go, I don't see a problem with doing whatever you want to do beforehand. But then to say, I don't want to look ugly, indicating that if you didn't do this, you were ugly during birth. I know. That's problematic. Totally. But if you're like, I'm going to be Tuesday, 11 a.m. is when I'm going in.

So that morning I'm going to get my nails done, I'm going to feel good, I'm going to get into a good state, that's absolutely fine by me. Have a little foot spa. A little trim. Some reflexology. A little trim. Well, you get a little bit of reflexology, do you? No.

Didn't have you pinned for a pressure point lab? I was just thinking, like, what could you do? Your feet's kind of, you couldn't get a massage, could you, if you were heavily pregnant? Yeah. Not lying down. I know you can get pregnancy massages, what could you do? Your feet's kind of, you couldn't get a massage, could you, if you were heavily pregnant? Yeah. Not lying down. Oh, no, you can get pregnancy massages. Oh, you can?

But this year, I want to know what you did immediately before you. Did you? Yeah. After a big meal. Well, Sian, I got them both pregnancies. She had two each pregnancy. Yeah. A special like, I think it was like a hey mama or something.

A hey mama. And she said it was so good and I was just like, can I get one? And the woman's like, it's unconventional. But yeah, sure, we'll do what you do. It felt good. I was on my side. You don't get massaged on your side too often. No.

That's good. It sounds like a half-ass massage. I don't know, it was good. I was like, get in there. Yeah. They didn't ask me the questions, but apparently they say, any parts of your body that has been sore during pregnancy? Oh, my back.

My back. My little back. My ankles. What? My back. All right. So we want to take your calls. 0800-DIALS-IT-M.

You can text us as well, 9696. What did you do just immediately before you were giving birth? Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. So we want to know what you did immediately before giving birth. What was your last minute sort of zhuzh, pluck, shave, tuck, nip, whatever? An Australian influencer did a full makeover. Manny, Petty, blowout, full face.

Maybe it was something a bit unusual. Maybe it was. Is it insane? I tell like, I tell you what. Woman, eh? They are out there. They're out there. The silent warriors. Are you saying a positive thing or a negative thing?

No, no, no. Positive. Silent warriors. Silent warriors. Between contractions, I ironed my clothes that I planned to wear to the hospital. Jeepers. And when I went into labour, I went and bought the groceries. So I knew that there was going to be food at home,

and when I was out, I saw a dryer. I was like, we'll need one of those, and I purchased a dryer as well. Jeepers. In between. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. Midwife told me to come in in the evening, and she'd break my waters to get things moving.

And they just got a feed on the way. Just casually went through the dry throw on the way and got a big feed. Wow. Yeah. Jeez Louise. Anonymous, Joanne. So, Synonymous, what did you do just before Labor giving birth? Morning, everyone.

I actually made a batch of spiced popcorn and some shortbread with sprinkles and a tan square. Oh, can I just say? A tan square. Damn, girl, we're on a journey there. How am I going to be hearing about delicious homemade tan square? Tan square. Annabelle Langbine makes a great tan square.

Yeah, because I love her banana cake recipe. Anyway, we sidetracked here. Sidetracked by Annabelle Langbein. I just want to make clear, my noise was for her food, not her. I think she's lovely, but I wouldn't... You wouldn't... What have you got against Annabelle Langbein? Nothing, nothing, nothing.

I respect her too much to just make this noise about her. If I was to romance Annabelle Langbine, she doesn't need you romancing her. There'd be chivalry. Steak. How are you impressing her? You can't bake something. No, no, no, I'm doing tasks.

I'm winning the garden. We're getting sidetracked here by Annabelle Langbine. All I want to say is I've got a 40-point plan to win the hand of Annabelle Langlois. So, Anonymous, the pain of a child ripping through your organs down towards the party area. You decided to do three sessions of baking. Yes, yes. I wanted to make sure that my family had something to eat.

What a woman. Make sure that you've had something to eat. What a woman. They should make sure that you've got something to eat. Can I ask why in God's name did you put sprinkles on shortbread? I just like to decorate my shortbread. Everybody knows all the decoration a shortbread needs is a fork pressed in the top. Yes. Also, how do the sprinkles stick to shortbread? They don't stick.

You bake them in. You bake them in. Do you put the sprinkles on pre-bake? So they kind of work. It forms around the eyes. Yeah, pre-bake, pre-bake. I'd be happy if sprinkles didn't exist. Full stop on the planet.

Get rid of them. Ice cream, waste of time. I like eating ice cream feeling like I've dropped it in sand. Also, this woman is in labour as she's cooking these shortbreads. So she's out of her damn mind. Imagine the husband. She's cooking, she's in labour and he walks in and he's like, what have you put sprinkles in the shortbreads. So she's out of her damn mind. Yeah, no. Imagine the husband. She's cooking, she's in labour, and he walks in. He's like, what have you put sprinkles in the shortbreads?

Oh, my God. Anonymous, thanks for your call. He died that day. Some more messages in. He died that day. I planned to get a Brazilian wax but went into labour early so I quickly grabbed the veet and popped it on. Fear to say it burnt, but once I got to the hospital...

No! They did a check and the smell of the veet was so strong. And afterwards my husband was like, did you mean to have a rat's tail down the side? And I said... Again, that husband died that day. Just leave it. We had some...

Vaughan's had a veet incident. In the genetics? And it roasted my nipples. No, no, no. Dude, like my nipples weeped. They wept. Jesus and my nipples No no no Dude Like my nipples weeped They wept Jesus And my nipples wept All weekend Jesus wept

Jesus Liv said I fed 450 calves By hand So that would She'd be out there She's a dairy farming lady Oh right

She's got to feed those bloody calves Yeah right They'll go hungry otherwise Contractions have started But you've got to feed the calves Yeah Kelly said I quickly organised people to pack and move

my house the next day. Moving the next day. Don't be moving around you, baby. Time, that's a lot. Selena, what did you do just before birth? I was 15 metres dilated and walked nine holes of a golf course with my husband. What? Were you playing golf

as well or were you just walking? I wasn't playing golf. I'm not a golfer. So I was just trudging along. And this old man came up to me. He's like, you look very heavily pregnant. And I didn't want to tell him. You were literally open. I was literally open in preparation.

I'm about as dilated as that knife hole that we're just putting for now. You see that? That's bad. Also, like, Yes, you will. Also, like, again, your husband. Like,

why was, no, no, no, why was he playing golf? Is he still your husband? he is still my husband. The midwife, the labour was kind of stalling so I kind of got halfway and then

my contractions were slowing. The midwife said, oh, we'll go for a walk and my husband was pretty pumped to get onto the golf course. So we thought, well, that's as good as any. Because if you're two holes in and he's like two under par on each hole,

and you're like, it's going, we've got to leave. He's like, I can't leave now, I'm on a hot streak. Golf guys are built different. Selena, thanks for your call. Just to finish up, some messages. Keita said, not me, but my friend voted while in labour. You can't miss the opportunity. I wonder if she voted for Labour while in Labour.

Oh, yeah. She's got big national energy coming from that text. Do you think so? Oh, what if it kills me? The day before, my youngest was born. My wife tail-painted 215 cows. Dairy mating waits for no one.

Now, I'll need to explain this. What's tail painting? Tail painting is where you put paint on the top of the dairy cow's tails. Now, when they're on heat, when they're ovulating, they release a scent, and other cows want to ride them. So they ride them and rub off the paint, and that's how you know that that's their cycle. They've been ridden. Oh, okay.

You can mark their cycle for three weeks' time. That's when they'll be great for AB, artificial breeding. That's what Aaron does when my cycle's kicking in. He paints you. Gives me a little spray paint on the butt. Gives you a little tail paint, and he can tell you've been rubbing up against things. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley.

Play ZM. Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Fletch Vaughan and Hayley's Monday Maestros. Well, producer Anna sent us this task on Friday, and it is to learn a scene and act out a scene from the movie Bridesmaids. I will say as well, you can see the movie Bridesmaids on Neon right now. Do you remember they sponsored The Secret Sound? I do remember that. Yes, just only last week. Indeed.

And you can sign up now for your seven-day free trial at neontv.co.nz. T's and C's apply. I don't know if they want anything to do with this terrible acting that's about to happen. Speak for yourself. Also, I listened to the Smart List podcast when they interviewed Kristen Wiig and they talked about

the impact of this film, which originally was a box office flop for about a week. Was it really? Yeah. And then it caught on and now it is considered one of the best movies of all time. Because Bridesmaids is one of those movies just every now and again you'd be like,

I could just watch Bridesmaids. That'll cheer me up. Do you know what I mean? When you're flicking, you don't know what you want to watch. You're always like, let's watch Bridesmaids. Okay. Just flick them through. Bridesmaids will do.

It's not for me. I don't find women funny. Diddy, what a hangover, though. You guys do that. What a hilarious bunch of men. Because at the time That's what people Were saying right It's the female

100% Hangover Absolutely Bridesmaids Every time It's so hilarious If you love Bridesmaids Bridesmaids was written

By Kristen Wiig I'm a big Bridesmaids fan Kristen Wiig And Annie Someone Whose name I've forgotten And they They wrote a movie

Which they both star in Called Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar. So funny. That's newer, isn't it? Barb and Star. And they play their characters.

Yeah. It's a newer movie than Brian's Mates. All right. Okay. Now, the scene that we're doing from Brian's Mates, it's the plane. It's the scene in the plane. It's the plane scene. Yeah.

And so I'm playing the role of Annie, who is Kristen Wiig's character. Vaughn, are you playing? I don't know. Lillian. Lily, you're playing Lillian. Oh, yeah, but is that my Rudolph character? My Rudolph character. Yeah, and I'm playing Helen.

Helen, and also? The male flight attendant. Why do we have to? I'm the worst at this. It's W, your chance to win. It's range. Range, okay. You want to see range, you want to see difference.

Okay, all right. Well, let's start the scene then. We're in a plane. Can you please turn up my computer? I've got my own. How you doing? Wow. Oh, no, hold on.

Hey, buddy. How you doing? Wow. Oh, no, hold on. Hey, buddy. How you doing? You can't just... Don't BS her, BS her. No, that was me. I'll go again. Hey, buddy. How are you doing dual voices at the same time?

I'm a ventriloquist. I'll start again. I don't know that I can work with this one. How you doing? I'm good. I'm really relaxed. Thank you, Helen. I'm just excited.

I'm relaxed. And I'm ready to party with the best of them. And I'm going to go down to the river. Hey, buddy. How you doing? Wow. Looks like someone is really relaxing now. What are you guys talking about up here? We're

going to a restaurant tonight, and I know the owner. Oh, you do? Munch Simpson, when did you get here? Don't ruin my acting. I'm sorry. It's beautiful character choice. Feed me the line again, please. We're going to a restaurant tonight.

I know the owner. You do? Oh, Helen knows the owner. Oh, big whoop. Wow, looks like someone is really relaxing now. You've said that? Hey, Annie, let's go take a nap. What do you say?

Yeah. Male flight attendant. Miss, you cannot be up here. Hello, Grandpa. I'm sorry. I just want to be up here with my friends because I'm with this group. Yeah. Can't she just stay up here for a while?

The sign's off. I think that's a good idea. Oh, wait a minute. You've gone a bit quick here for a while? The signs off. I think that's a good idea. Oh, wait a minute. You've gone a bit quick there, actually. The signs off. The swings off. The swings off. No, coach passengers aren't allowed up here in first class.

It's policy. Sorry. Oh, this is a very, very strict plane that I'm on. Welcome to Germany. Auf Wiedersehen, asshole. The sign's off. Oh my god. The sign's off.

I think... No, you gotta say I'm gonna go take a nap. I'm gonna go take a nap. I think that's a good idea. Catch it on the flip side. Mother effers. I think that's a good idea. Oh, wait a minute.

I'm sorry. She's... This is a free trial, as always. It's a free trial. Do they not let you do all the lines? Yeah, you can't like... Select specifically ones. This, curtains, curtains.

This should be open. It's civil rights. This is the 90s. Right, it's not. You're in the wrong decade. You are. Okay, it's not. You're in the wrong decade. You are. Okay, right, I am. I'm sorry.

She's... Oh, sorry. Holy shit. What did you give her? Okay, then... Sneaking in, sneaking in, slipping into the seat. Miss? No, no, it is not me.

Yes, it's you. Please go back to your seat. Oh, no, it is not me. Yes, it's you. Please go back to your seat. No, I am with him. I am Mrs. Iglesias. No, you're not. You were just up here and you put sunglasses on. Out. No, no. I don't want to.

Helen. I'm now Helen. She can have my seat. Everyone else here should experience first class in their lives. And I don't want Annie to miss out because she couldn't afford a ticket. Help me, I'm poor. Insane. Insane. Now, that was terrible acting.

I think naturalreaders.com online did very well. Wow. I've got to say, immediate feedback, actually. Anna, you're the judge of this. Wow. That was a lot to take in. I just had a busy weekend. You know, I had lots to do.

I didn't have time to memorise this. Whatever. Hayley absolutely killed it. There was a lot of line memorisation there as well, which I really appreciated. I told you I have a superior memory. I had good memorisation too. I don't recall Helen being from Taranaki and having a strong accent there.

Very rude. I will say I really liked the flight attendant. And I feel like you gave it 110% Fletch. Thank you, thank you. I feel like you really delivered those lines. You were projecting. Yep, thank you. You had passion.

Yeah. It's probably my stage training, you know, like we're real projectionists. Yeah, thank you. You had passion. Yeah. It's probably my stage training, you know, like we're real projectionists. Yeah, projectionists. No, that's someone that works at a movie cinema. Projectors. Projectors. We project. We project. Yeah. We project. I think your character work is really

paying off and I would like to give the win today to Fletch. Wow! Hi! I feel it's a pity win, it's a pity win, but I'll take it. It's not a pity win. You gave me a lot to work with. However, when I was looking, trying to connect with Vaughan, he was playing his game on his phone

and letting a computer do the lines for him. And that's not a lot to work with. I actually work in abstract theatre. I don't adhere to, you know, the, oh, hold on, I got an email. You're working in a more Brechtian format. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

It's Benson Boone and the Stars on ZM. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Oh, the way you said stars just then. Stars. Did you hear that? You said stars. In the stars. In the stars.

Well, it's sort of beautiful. Well, thank you. Really painted the scene. I just like to add a bit of Ginny Saquo. Ah, Ginny Saquo. Benson Boone, in the stars. I would put how you said stars on point with how a girl from Game of Thrones, House of the Dragon last week said,

Negroni, Spagliato. Spagliato. Spagliato. Negroni. Proseata. Spagliata. Spagliata. Negroni. Prosecco. Spagliata. With Prosecco. With Prosecco.

Sade would not let me buy mad cocktail ingredients, tomatoes at the weekend. She said you've already had too much to drink. Come over to the Courtesy Sprout Residence. I'll come over for a Negroni sabagliata. Spagliata. Spagliata. Like Timia. Spanglia paterata. Spanglia. Like Tim Curry.

Spanglia. I would love to see sales figures after. Dude, apparently like bars worldwide had to make them for the first time ever. Negroni. Spanglia. Spanglia. With bars. Imagine being responsible for like a worldwide trend.

I mean, I am. But she's not getting any kickback. I'd imagine she's getting sent a case of. Yeah. The ingredients. Champari. Campari. Campari.

Vermouth. Is that one where you do use the martini rossa, like the red vermouth? It is, yeah. Red vermouth. And then some Prosecco. And an orange. I don't want to talk about what we're going to talk about. Let's keep talking about this.

Well, you can't. You've teased us. Do you want to come over for a cocktail this evening? Journey to Hell. Yes. Yeah, I'll just do five minutes more on the stair machine, and then I've earned it. Come over and we'll make bloody spagliato. And then you know what?

You can sit outside under the stars. Oh. Stars. He's good. Drinking a spagliato. The other story is not nearly as exciting. California has approved digital number plates. Digital number plates.

So it's like, you know those, I imagine, is it like the price tags at the supermarket? You know when they're all electronic? Yeah. And they have the thing on them? Yeah. You're like, that's digital. And also more of like a QR code for scanning.

Yeah, right. And so cameras will be able to scan it and immediately be like, stolen. Oh, wow. That person's got fines, which they can do already, but you have to tap it in and it dials into the database. So if your car is stolen, can the license plate be like flashing red, say, stolen on it?

It could be anything. Wow. I guess it gets powered from your car, but your car would also need a connection. Yeah, right. So yeah, going forward, because we just got in Aotearoa, New Zealand, we just got the old black number plates with the white writing back. Did we? Yeah, you can get the first one.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I just asked you to please calm down, ma'am. Ma'am is very excited about it. Oh, man. Yeah, you know, my Land Rover's got one. Yeah, it does. It's the black plate with the silver writing on it, and it looks cool, but it's a new font.

But yeah, it's back, which I always think, because number plates, if you've got a black car, number plates are a little bit ghastly, because they're so like, wah, look at me. I've got a gunmetal car. Do you reckon it would go good, or am I better with white? Yeah. Oh, they do look cool, don't they?

Yeah, so cool. So you can redesign government-issued plates from 179 and then i'm guessing that yeah you get personalized plates yeah plates but so you got a plates kiwi plates no it's not plates that kind of it's kiwi plates yeah i would like to know how much you you pay to be in charge of personalized plates because surely you have to pay the government a bit of something yeah i don't know but the black plates do look awesome. Yeah, they look way better. But you don't have to have those. I think white's still the default.

White with black writing. Oh, I want the black one. Doodle. Fletch is just saying if doodle's available. Nah, this combination's not available. I can get a doody, a D-0-O-D-1-E. Nah, what about, no, you'd be better with the D-O. That's available.

No, no, no, the other one was better, where it was doodle except the E on the end was a three. What about two and a half thousand? Yeah, they're the same. Two and a half thousand dollars. What about D-O space D-I-L-L, doodle? Yeah. Oh, my God.

See, how good does the doodle look on that black plate? No, it looks like doody. Doody. You love drawing so much. You love sketching so much you're going to the doodle look on that black plate? No, it looks like doody. Doody. You love drawing so much. That's why, yeah. You love sketching so much, you're going to get doodle. People would pull up to the lights and be like, what's your plate mean? I'd be like, I love doodling.

Yeah, I'm an artist. Yeah, get a pencil. I'm a real doodler. Get a pencil sticker. Okay, so the doodle would be, standard black plate would be $1,049. Fantastic. Have you already had it? No, this is for me to get it.

Oh, okay. Why did you say two and a half before? I don't know. There was an option for two and a half. I don't know if that's a different plate. Right. Oh, yeah, that's if you go for one of those European fancy ones. They're a bit more.

That's like $1,200. They're a bit boosh. Or, yeah, if you go, it's two and a half thousand if you want a special number of characters, just two or three. Is it? Oh, I'm not filling in all of them. So if you just went like, hey, check availability, not available. That'll be gone, yeah.

That'll be gone. What about HJS? Check availability. That'll be gone. Heavy chain sprawl. Gone. Gone. What about LOL?

Check availability. Gone. Damn. I think I've seen LOL with my own two eyes. It's so good. I was like, what a waste of money. That's what I said to myself. But we must be due to run out, but we're getting through the number plates.

We're getting through the alphabet again with the three letters, three numbers. I want to see them go to emojis so I can ring the police and say someone just ran me over. It was like laugh, cry, wink, and then poop. Eggplant. Poop. Eggplant. Peach. S-R. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.