ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 1st February 2023

Episode Date: January 31, 2023

Top 6: Water Logged AFTs  Silly Little Poll!  Carbonara  Hayleys Sexy Content  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Drive through and get a cup of barista-made coffee on the go. Hi. Hello. Hello.

Hi. Hi. Hello. I just got a piece of mail. You're going to love this. Am I? What is it? What did you get. You're going to love this. Am I? What is it? What did you get?

You're going to love this. Dungeons and Dragons dice. Oh my gosh. Tabletop roleplay game dice. Somebody saw that the boys and I played for the first, jeez, I've got a few sets here. I thought it was going to be really exciting. I thought it was jelly beans.

When I saw the colours. You thought it was jelly beans When I saw the colours You thought it was jelly beans I'm really excited It's from Totara Hobbies God it's good seeing people Doing their little Side hustle still hey Yeah it is good

That's pretty neat But yeah They saw that my wife Was whinging and complaining online That the nerd herd Had overtaken her kitchen table Oh god I felt so sorry For your wife

And You should have Evacuated her to your house For some wines and complaining online that the nerd herd had overtaken her kitchen table. Oh, God, I felt so sorry for your wife. You should have evacuated her to your house for some wines. I thought about it when I saw that, but she had a mate, didn't she? She didn't need any encouragement to evacuate for wine. She absolutely got on the wines. Most people have been evacuating because their houses have flooded, but Vaughan's wife wanted to evacuate the nerds that have flooded the lounge. Yeah. But have you rolled these dice?

They're fun. They're a fun dice because they're not a traditional six-sided die. You know, we talk about dice, and you're probably used to the six-sided dice or the D6. Jared's trying to wheel behind you to get a better angle of the nerd die. So that's your traditional six-sided dice. Yeah. Give me a funky one. This is a 20-sided dice.

So it's more fun because there's 14 more numbers you could possibly roll. We've probably lost so many listeners just in the last minute. If I roll this one a 17, Vaughn, you have to come to breakfast and pay for it. Oh, yeah. We're gaming now. I like this.

17, Vaughn has to come to brekkie and pay for it. Well, let's all pick a number. And whoever's number gets rolled has to pay for breakfast. What's my number? Okay, you're 17. Seven. You're seven. Yeah.

I'll be... Twelve. Twelve. Okay, go, go, go, go. Nine. Oh. We're all paying for our own breakfast. See, we risked there.

There was a certain risk element involved in the dice. Okay, one more, one more. If I roll an 11, you each have to tell me and all of our podcast listeners a little secret. Okay, okay. If it doesn't, I'll tell you one. This is what we should do for the podcast intro. We should have a list of 20 things and we roll and whatever comes up, we do and then cross it off and have to come up with another one. Stay tuned.

Yeah, okay. Okay, if it's an 11, you've got to tell me a little secret. And we'll come up with some sort of name pun for what we're doing. Yeah. Okay, I like that idea. 11, 11, 11. See, the dice were fun. Now, I did interrupt that with the boobs to try to stop it falling off the desk.

Yeah, that's fine. It's 14. Okay, so now you have to tell us a secret. The other day I was in an Uber and I was painting my fingernails in the back on my way to a wedding. Yeah. And I didn't want him to see,

so I was like kind of hiding. And at the end, I didn't want to put the nail polish in my handbag for the wedding, so I just left it in the back of his car. I thought you were going to say you spilt it on the floor mats. I was waiting for that.

No, no, no, no, no, not that bad. I said a little secret. A little secret. So there's some Uber in Christchurch driving around with a bright purple. In the back of the seat? Yeah, OPI nail polish in the back. Okay. Prius?

Prius. Rolling around in the back or in the little pocket in the back of the seat? It's in the door, little nook. You know how like if you've got a handle thing, there's a little nook, like a little swell, little tray? Oh, there you go. It's in there, free. A little freebie for you.

I quite like this dice, just for fun games. It's fun little games. Okay. We'll come up with a list of 20. Yeah. In fact, we should just get the podcast family to do it for us because I'm all about outsourcing. Yeah, same.

I'll put a post up on the podcast family. Yeah, lovely. You give us some tasks and we will allocate them to a number. Okay, there could be questions, tasks. Oh, you were going

to answer questions? No, thanks, silly. I don't want to have to get off my chair. Oh, no, no, no. It's chair-based. It's chair-based. Everything will be chair-based.

And vocal. Chair-based tasks. Chair-based vocal antics. Yes. Chair-based tasks. Like meowing like a cat. Yeah. And then we'd give our best cat impersonation.

No, because that's not going to fill out this start of the podcast. That was when I was angry. And I could chase a string. My cat says Aaron's name. He goes, Aaron, when he's upset. No, that's every cat is going, Aaron. No, it is my specific cat looking at his father and saying

Ow, fat cat when you pick it up and put it out at night that's right I put all the animals outside at night. That's so mean you put your cat out at night.

I put it in the laundry it can come and go from the laundry as it pleases but it's not having free roam of the house it scratches on the door it's fat

and it wants to be fed at ridiculous hours. And you pick it up off the couch, it goes, It was on the couch watching TV too. Yeah, you'd make that same noise if I just picked you up off the couch. Yeah, like a bouncer picking you up and dragging you out of the club. It wasn't me, mate. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan

and Hayley. Thank you, Sam. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley as more rain falls on the North Island. God, leave us alone. I had to put on my, I had all my wet weather gear from Elton John,

which is nicely dried, and I was like, well, this will be fun. Went quite nicely with your Birkenstocks. Yes, the Birkenstocks part of that. Birkenstocks. All-weather outfit. Yeah, wet weather gear, jacket, pants. And the only thing wet, my Birkenstocks.

Absolutely soaked to the core. Oh, my God. Yes, nothing like wet leather. Squelchy leather. Squelchy cork base. You know what? That's the worst of it. Some horrible flooding out there.

We're getting reports already this morning of people's places flooded. Vaughan, you engaged the four-wheel drive. I was driving the Jimny this morning. Because when I was driving just slightly ahead of you, I was getting, you know, the pull from all the little puddles of water. Well, there was quite a bit of surface water and a sidewind. Yeah, so take it easy out there this morning. Vaughan, you've done it again.

Every time you put on a T-shirt, you swipe your little deodorant armpit back. Oh, yeah, I always put deodorant on after you put the T-shirt on. Yes, it's always on that side as well. Must be the way you put it on. Yeah. Right, well, Vaughan, Stiotta and Mark aside, we'll keep you updated this morning, throughout the morning, with

all the developments. Yeah. Any road closures. And I'm sure we'll know more once daylight. Once we get some daylight. I hope we still get to go away tomorrow. People wake up. That'll be fun. Well, yeah, and Wellington Airport yesterday had some fog issues. A lot of flights didn't get in and out. Yeah. That'd be fun. Well, yeah, and Wellington Airport yesterday had some fog issues. Fog?

A lot of flights didn't get in and out, yeah. Good Lord! Is it the end times? Is it the end of the world as we know it? Is it winter? What's happening? Yeah. It's warm winter.

It's warm winter. That's what we're calling it. Welcome to warm winter. Yeah. Fun times. That would actually be, because I remember there was, you know, it was proposed that we play REM's It's the End of the World As We Know It for a Friday flashback when Russia invaded Ukraine,

and you said it was a little on the nose. Is this a little on the nose again to play it this week? It's probably a little on the nose, yeah. It could be. It could be a little on the nose. It still feels timely, though, doesn't it? Doesn't it, Jams? It's a great song, too.

It is a great song. The top six is coming up on the show. Yeah, a shop that sells adult equipment, shall we say, was a victim of the floods and had to put a whole lot of waterlogged, non-waterproof bits and pieces in the bin. Lingerie, for example. Oh, yeah, okay.

Yeah, some satisfaction machinery. Oh, yeah. Lingerie. Yeah, some satisfaction machinery. Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, they wouldn't survive that. You've got to go waterproof. But they're saying that someone dumps the dove and stole a whole lot of it out of the bin. Is it stealing, though, if you dumps to dive? I think we established it's not illegal in New Zealand.

It's not illegal. But they are saying careful purchasing these sorts of things off online marketplaces because you might be buying one that's waterlogged. So we've got the top six signs. Your Valentine's Day sex toy has been underwater. Okay. It's coming up next on the show, though.

There is a 100-year-old woman who has given some life advice on how to live a long life. It's not one of those 100-year-olds that drinks every day, is it? Yeah, who's like, a shot of tequila. Yes. No, it's not that. It's something different this time. Play.

ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. There is a woman who has just turned 100 years old, and before you ask, she did receive a letter from King Charles and Queen Camilla. Is that what you call her? Queen Consort. Queen Consort Camilla. Sounds weird, doesn't it? You're not my real queen.

You're not my, no. You'll never be my real queen. Yeah. I asked Father not to marry her. Are you doing his audio book? That was, yeah, yeah, yeah. My todger had a little bit of frostbite on the end. And I thought, mummy!

Mummy, I took acid and had a wild time. I shot so many Taliban. Yeah. Killed a lot of men and shelved a lot of drugs up my anus. Then watched the box set of suits. Thought, I want my own bit of that. Oh, you're a nice guy. A bit of common, isn't he?

Yeah. Oh, I want my own bit of that. Oh, you're a nice guy, but come on in there. Oh, I want my own bit of that. This book does seem like a wild read. Do you know anyone that's read it? No, I mean, I've seen a lot of people online who have read it and who are saying that it's a bloody good read. Right, okay. It's a hard no thanks from me.

Oh, it's Michelle Obama's new book. It's the next book on mine. I bet it is. You know, man, M-O-B. Yeah. Michelle Obama. Okay, M-O-B. Yeah. Michelle M-O-B. Obama.

Okay, got you. Yeah, right. Anyway, this 100-year-old lady who lives in the United Kingdom, a lot of people do this. When they turn 100, they ask for, people ask for life advice.

Well, how did you get it? What's the secret to a long and happy life? Because she has known, this woman, for a sense of humour around the home. Family put her in a home. Well, you're 100.

Come on. Yeah, I know. And her life advice was to avoid talking to strange men and you'll be just fine. Not bad advice. That's it. Not bad advice. It was her go-to advice. Avoid talking to strange men and you will be just fine, she promises.

Was she not into men? No, no. She's not a lesbian. She had a husband. They met at church. They travelled the world together. Lived in Singapore for a while. Oh, lovely.

Okay. Must be nice. Must be nice, yeah. Yeah, no, she loved him. I mean, he's dead now. Yeah, she would have outlived him by quite a while. The women usually do. Yeah, no, she loved him. I mean, he's dead now. Yeah, she would have outlived him by quite a while. The women usually do. Yeah, they do.

But the home that he used to always buy her every single year, an Estee Lauder perfume, Estee. I don't know what type it is, but you probably don't want to smell like a 100-year-old woman, so I won't plug the brand. It might have done the full loop though, you know. Ah, because the grandma look came back for a while. You know, like big granny glasses and grey hair.

Yeah. That was fashionable for a while. During lockdown anyway. So you could have an Estee Lauder stench to you. All she got for her birthday was an Estee Lauder perfume and a box of Lindau balls. Linda, Lindau. Lindor.

Oh, Lindor. It's been a Lindor ball. Lindor. It's not Lindau. Lindor. Oh, Lindor. Lindor balls. Lindor. Lindor balls. L-I-N-D-O-R. Linds. Lindors. The balls. Linds. Balls are called Lindors. Oh, are they? Yes. Right. Yeah. They're quite delicious. Sponsored by the Great Kiwi Bake Off. I love those. It's terrible. On the back of the Great Kiwi Bake Off

set, they have these ginormous cylinders full of the Lindor balls. And yet we last season during filming didn't see a single ball. I don't remember seeing a single ball. Did I bring in some balls? You brought in no balls. I didn't see any balls last year. I didn't see any balls.

I gave you balls. I'm sure I gave you balls. You didn't bring any balls. You brought enough of your own. Surely you're a man who can find his own balls. Surely. I mean, I could go to the supermarket and buy some Lindor balls. Well, I promise you, this year I'll bring you some Lindor balls.

Are they sponsoring again? Well, I would assume so. I would assume so. Well, it's a highly popular show, isn't it? This is all business talk anyway. I'll let you know. People like a peck behind the curtains every now and then. Yeah.

Well, there you go. I'll bring you some Lindor balls, as this old lady seems to enjoy. Well, she's 100, so a Lind ball can't hurt you. And make sure today that you don't talk to any strange men. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. A lot of rain has fallen overnight, continues to fall in Auckland, outside our window. Look at that.

As heavy as it was when we came to work this morning, which was as heavy as it was when it was Friday afternoon and Elton John. We were heading to the Elton John concert. And it was insane. It's hitting from a different angle this time because last time it just came straight down, north to south, really slow moving,

coming in slightly from the west. So that's why we got hit out west Auckland first and then it just super slowly moved in and hit central. Yeah. This time it's coming in from the east and it's got a bit of wind behind it. Now, getting reports in, Producer Carwain, you've just taken a call

from somebody on the Auckland motorway. Hello. Yes, I have. What was the situation there? So she was saying that she was at the Green Lane on-ramp, sort of in that area of Countdown, and it was completely flooded. By Ritchie's Café. Yeah, sounds like a good place. Is Ritchie still on Café?

I don't know if he still does Café. I think he might do. I would say that's one of my favourite McDonald's. Well, it's the McDonald's, isn't it? It leads on to the motorway. It's the McDonald's. Is it still considered one of their flagship stores? It's a beautiful McDonald's, and I will say the show is thanks to McCaffer,

and they do have one. You can drive through and get a cup of barista-made coffee on the go. Because on a day like this. Now is a good time to plug the show. Can I say when it was better? When it used to have the best McDonald's playground in the country. I know. It was leagues ahead of other McDonald's playgrounds.

Well, we are giving important information now about the road conditions, Vaughan. I'm trying to load the traffic cameras. Well, I'm looking at State Highway 1 Market Road southbound. That's kind of our area that we're talking about. What did this person say to you, Carween? She said that her car was quite stuck, possibly. Oh, God. Jeez Louise. Yeah, and she and one of your

silly cars, the electric leaf or whatever it is. The aqua is not silly. Ironically, the aqua wouldn't last long in aqua. No, I did drive through that area this morning and did feel like I was floating a little. And that was at 5am. Yes.

So she said that it was like flooded quite all the way to Manukau Road, which is quite far. So just be careful around there. Yeah, it's a long way on a boat. If you can work from home today, that's what they're saying. If you don't need to be out... What, are you everybody's boss, are you?

Who made you the boss of New Zealand? I'm sorry, but are you just giving everybody permission to work from home? I don't think he's got the authority. I don't think you've got the authority. Who's they? The people, the government people. Say them! I don't know. I don't know. All right.

I mean, go to work. Get your car stuck in a motorway. No, don't do that either. You don't have the authority to tell them that either. You've got no rights here. You are neither their employer nor Transport. I will say State Highway 1 is also closed north of Auckland. Brinduwin's, Waipu.

Is that still shut? Yeah, so that is still closed. Waka Kotahi have an amazing list of all the roads that are closed. So if you are travelling anywhere across the country, Coromandel especially. Did you see that road over from Kopu

over the hills is completely gone now? Yeah. Gone? Gone. Like not a patch job? It was a little bit of a slip, then it was half the road gone, now the whole road's slipped. Yeah. Like not a patch job. It was a little bit of a slip, then it was half the road gone, now the whole road's slipped. Yeah.

So it's a long way for a while. Laugh out louder with ZM. It's important to keep you updated with these things, isn't it? It is, it is. Well, here's a little bit of light fluff to distract from these terrible weather events. So, you know, skims, Kim Kardashian's, I don't know, what do you call it? It's like shapewear, Spanx. She does bralettes, thongs, socks, everything now.

Do you own any of these? I don't, I can't afford it. Where do you buy them in New Zealand? Do you have to buy online? Or do they sell them in stores? I feel like David Jones did some for a while, or like Kikoldian Stains and all those kind of places. That's pretty nice.

Thank you. But no, they're really expensive. But I do have friends that own some of them and say that they're amazing. Right. Like love the body suits and love the pants and stuff. But she does all sorts of things. And the latest thing she's created

has caused some chatter online. It's called the Micro Thong and the micro bralette. Okay. Micro meaning... Tiny. Tiny, tiny, tiny. Now, I went on the website to have a look at this, the actual skims.com,

and I'll just show you the thong bit because... Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. And is that the bra on the top right? Oh, my God. That's like... The size of your average nipple on a lady. Yeah, but with the straps.

What is this? This is providing zero support. So I think it's supposed to be kind of playful and I don't know that you'd wear it to the beach. Unless you want all the little kids seeing your nips. The bikini bit is, that's the debate online, is where are you supposed to tuck it all? You know?

There really is no room for lippage. And there was, if you go on the different colours of the things on the website, I will give her kudos. Did Lippage upset you somewhat? It's true. But she's not wrong. I don't know how else you can describe it.

None of the women in the room. That's the best way of putting it. Yeah, no. There's no room. It would engulf it. Yeah. Mine would at least. That's all I'll say.

I mean, maybe next time use an analogy. Right. Yeah. I thought Lippage was being soft. Yeah. Mine would at least. That's all I'll say. I mean, maybe next time use an analogy. Right. Yeah. I thought lippage was being soft. Anyway. It would be like trying to, you could say it would be like trying to, what do you call it when you put tape across somebody's mouth? To duct tape them. To shut them up. It'd be like

trying to, what do you call it? Gag. Gag. It'd be like trying to gag someone with tooth floss. Yeah. And their mouth is wide open. Yeah. It's just not going to work.

It's not going to work. The scale of it. I will say that, so on the website of hers, that she's used, like on each different colour, she's used different models. And on one I'm looking at here, which is the silver glittery one, she's used like a lovely curvy lady and like she looks great. Yeah. But she's posing in a way in which we

all the dangerous areas are well hidden. She looks articulated. She looks like the string undies make it look like a Barbie, you know when you get a Barbie and it's articulated and you can see where the joins happen, that's what it looks like. She's been cut in half.

She's been segmented. So there was a lady on TikTok who bought it to try it. And I would say she would be like a New Zealand size eight. So quite a petite woman. And she got it and put it on. And then to give a size comparison, she got some corn chips. Oh my God, that's like a Dorito.

That's the size. So if you think of a classic corn chip triangle Dorito shape. That is what would cover the breasticle. That's how much you've got on each nip and the whole downstairs. Yeah. So if your nipples or

private area don't fit within a Dorito, these aren't for you. Or you can try before you buy. Buy a bag of Doritos, which is much cheaper than this micro set. Oh, please tell me someone on TikTok's already put string on Doritos. Get the Doritos, do a lip check, do a lip check, and then

buy with caution. Right. Do a lip, do a lip, and then dip. And then dip. Because you might as well, you know, eat that Dorito with some salsa. Finish the chips. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. From the bustling ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hi there, a adult fun store. A purveyor of perversion.

A retailer of randiness. A shop of sin, the fun sin, has said that they had to chuck a whole lot of stuff out after the floods. It was water damaged, flood damaged. Right. But someone has gone through the skip and grabbed a whole lot of stuff. That's good. So they're saying, just be wary buying Valentine's Day sexy stuff online. Online, Facebook marketplace, Trade Me, et cetera, as it may have been in a flood. Because what people don't think about is, oh, sure, that might have been wet, that packaging, but it might have been wet with poos and stormwater and, you know, yuck.

Things you don't want to be putting in that area. No, yuck. Things you don't want to be putting in that area. No, definitely not. But I did wonder after the floods slash the floods continue today, sadly, what happens, like, if you have a retail store, like I saw shop owners that just absolutely devastating saying I've lost all this stock. Yeah. Like they get paid out if they've got insurance for that stock.

But then do they chuck that all in the bin? Because to me, like, surely some of that can be used, right? I know. I went to a fancy furniture store yesterday in Newmarket, and they'd been flooded, and all of their furniture was just stacked on the side so they could fix the floor. And I was like, are we going to have a little sale?

I'd buy a little soggy couch. I'd buy a water-damaged Land Rover Defender if I only had to spend, you know, half. $20,000 on a new air. Yeah I only had to spend, you know, half. $20,000 on a new air. Yeah, or something. I don't know. Yeah.

No, but it makes you think. Like, yeah, I mean, do they just chuck it all out? Sometimes you do have places that do like a damaged stock sale. Yeah, oh, there'll be lots. I reckon there'll be a fair bit of that coming up. Who owns that? If you're claiming insurance and getting reimbursed for all of the stock, the insurance company owns it. But is the insurance company going to come and pick it up

and have a sale or something? They'll have an assessor that would come out and say, is this worth us doing anything with or is it just going in a landfill? Because it does, in this time of, you know, we're trying to recycle and, you know, not waste things and there's so much trouble getting stuff into the country anyway. I know, but Vaughan loves going to the dump shop.

It's going to be fully stocked, babe. It's going to be popping off. It's so sad, though, isn't it? It's terrible. It's really terrible. Yeah. We don't need this. We're going to have to dig a new hole for our landfill.

Yeah. That would be my prediction. Where? Your place. Don't do it out my way. Out your way. Don't do it out my way. Underneath.

There's more land out your way. Oh, not our way. No, we'll go your way. Not in my backyard. No your way. Don't do it out my way. Underneath. There's more land out your way. Tunnel it. Oh, not our way. No, we'll go your way. Not in my backyard. No, no. Somebody else's. We can't dig in your backyard,

aka Auckland CBD. Seems like a good place for the trash to me. Out of the top six signs your Valentine's Day present is from a flood damage to the skip. Okay.

Alright, number six on the list. Your lube has a brown watery look to it and a bit of leaf in the top. Ew, don't. Nothing kills the mood. Your lube has a brown, watery look to it and a bit of leaves in the top. Ew, don't. Nothing kills the mood faster than a bit of leaf in your lube.

A bit of leaf on the lube. Leafy lube. What's that? Yeah. Oh. Oops. Number five on the list of the top six signs of your Valentine's Day present is from a flood-damaged skip.

Are your new lingerie smells like wet carpet? Yeah. Not in a good way. No. It's got a pong. Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six signs of Valentine's Day presents from a flood-damaged skip. Your new sexy handcuffs have some surface rust.

Oh, yeah. Already. Already. Yeah, they've been wet. When have you ever seen a pair of sexy handcuffs that have been made out of any sort of decent metal? It's always just... Joni Law Enforcement. Yes.

Yeah, but they're not sexy ones, are they? They're stainless steel. They won't rust like... You don't want to be restrained in the boudoir and be getting tetanus. Joni Law Enforcement. Yes. But they're not sexy ones, are they? They're stainless steel. They won't rust like, you know. You don't want to be restrained in the boudoir and be getting tetanus on your wrist. You really don't. No tetanus. A great reminder.

A great reminder. To get your tetanus boost up. To get your tetanus boost, everybody. Every 10 years you should have that. Ooh. Number three on the list of the top six signs Your Valentine's Day presents from a flood damage skip You've just got this real inkling That your butt plug has been lodged in a drain And likely caused some flooding Oh, okay

They got swirled around And if there was a little bit of guttering And it went in That would have blocked the ability for the water to escape And added to the flooding Terrible And you can just get a real feeling for that Sort of like a spiritual connection with the butt plug.

Yeah. Number two on the list of the top six signs your Valentine's Day presents from a flood damage skip. Your new leather spanking paddle

and the leather in your new swing is all swollen and it looks like it's been wet. You know when leather gets wet you can always tell

it's been wet? Yeah. Oh, my burps this morning. Yeah. They'll take a while. Take a while. I have to put them in the I don't have the hot water cupboard.

Oh dear. I do, but I don't really want your shoes in there. I am lending you my old phone, but I can't get into it. You owe him. My phone, we should talk about this because I think it's a phenomenon. My phone's got a big patch of the touch screen

that doesn't work anymore and it never fell in water. Were you using it in the rain though? I was using it in the rain, but these are supposed to be waterproof. has got a big patch of the touch screen that doesn't work anymore and it never fell in water. But it got, were you using it in the rain though? I was using it in the rain but these are supposed to be waterproof.

Yeah, well I say that. Yeah. And number one on the list of the top six signs of your Valentine's Day presents from a flood damage skip, your Satisfyer Pro 2 works

because it's the waterproof model but it came without the packaging. Yeah, you need the package. If you get a Satisfyer Pro 2 sans package, either it's secondhand, or the packaging was damaged in the flood.

Nobody's buying a secondhand one of those on Marketplace, are they? Or it comes wrapped in glad wrap, maybe, and you think that's silly. Oh, for God's sake. Or it comes in a shoebox, and they're like, I took it out of the packaging because I wanted it to be a surprise, but of course the packaging's very well known.

Yeah, right. Like, I'm in a box of favourites at Christmas. Yeah. You can tell by the shape of the box. Yeah. That's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. Play ZM.

Well, I'm just reading this story, Gen Z's latest cancellation. They should cancel the rain. Because when they cancel things, boy, oh, boy, Play ZM. Well, I'm just reading this story, Gen Z's latest cancellation. Are they going to cancel? They should cancel the rain. Because when they cancel things, boy, oh boy, do they go away. Everybody freaks out and just agrees, don't they? I don't want to be on the wrong side of history. Well, this is terrible timing,

given that my daughters have just started their candle business, but candles are cancelled. Why are candles cancelled? No, no, this is day two of us having a candle in the studio and feel the mood. Did they do something in the 80s? Racist tweet. Did they racist tweet in the 80s?

They burnt down some houses. Which, by the way, is probably alright for cancellation. Yeah, yeah, probably alright. So, no, it's lighting the candle that's the problem. Okay. So instead, you have a candle, but you have, or you don't need to have a candle. You can just have scented wax, no wick.

Okay. And you put it in a candle warmer, and it warms the candle so that the fragrance is released without the danger of fire. Okay. But there's a certain romantic element to watching a flame flicker. I know. And I find it quite erotic because to watching a flame flicker. I know. And I find it quite erotic because I'm a little bit of a pyro.

Yeah, you are. So is the candle warmer, is it something that you plug in and it... You can get them like, they're like lights. Yeah, it looks like a light. But then your candle wouldn't go down. You wouldn't waste your candle as fast. Well, maybe this is a great idea. They're money savers.

I'm all about the candle. Candle life for life. Well, maybe this is a great idea. They're money savers. I'm all about the candle. Candle life for life. Yeah, there's some, yeah. How long does a candle smell for if you keep heating it? Like, does it eventually run out of smell? Yeah, they're like 40 hours, aren't they, or something like that? No, that's if you light them. But if you're just a candle heating them.

But surely the fragrance, because, yeah, my girls have been making candles and they bought the concentrated fragrance. Yeah. And not much at all goes into each candle. Yeah, drip drop. Like a couple of drips. No, bugger all. Right.

Because it's so potent. Yeah, right. Like when they open the bottle to get the concentrate out, I'll be in the lounge and the minute they open it, it's like a beautiful fart. Yeah. That's just spread through the house so quickly. Yeah, right. Yep, that's open. That's happening. fart. Yeah. That's just spread through the house so quickly. Yeah, right.

You're just like, yep, that's open. That's happening. Wow. Yeah. Wow. Oh, don't cancel candles. Yeah. I feel at this stage it's a natural time to plug their business,

which the Instagram account is open for business. I followed the Instagram account. Thank you for that. Yeah, I followed too, but candles are done, mate. They need to get onto the candle. Well, those candles can be set in a candle warmer. But how do you, does it warm the glass? The container? It must do.

How hot are these warmers? Well it's got a light on top but the one I was looking at also had some sort of base thing that maybe provided an ambient warmth. Like seat cushions in the car. Yes. But I keep accidentally banging on in our family car and I think of Poodle Pants. Oh I hate, I hate heated seats.

I don't have it in my car because I'm a woman of the people. Yeah. But I hate it. It makes me feel sick because you're freezing cold but your butt's hot. Your butt's warm.

Yeah, it's a weird feeling. Yeah. I mean, I've been in like an Uber or someone's car that had it and I was like, ugh, don't like it. Accidentally knock it on

and you're like, oh, did I have a little rumbly of the tumbly? Yeah, gross. Yeah, but if you would like to, if you still want to light a candle or maybe just warm a candle, indy.and.august on Instagram for the candle drop. Absolute nepo babies.

They're nepo babies. They're nepo babies. Although I did see they are raising money for the dog. Chain dog rehab, where we got Richie from. So they're going to, she's our garden retriever. And they've got, that's just worth a plug as well because they've got a whole lot of dogs that they look after and a whole lot of dogs that they get from fairly,

like, terrible circumstances. Yeah. And so they've constantly got massive vet bills. I think their vet bill this month was like $14,500. Jesus. To save dogs' lives. So you can buy a candle and donate or you can just donate. I nearly had a golden retriever at the Sproul residence.

I know. Seriously. You go away too much. You don't need a dog. I don't need a dog. You can drop it off at Vaughan's. That's what a kennel's is for. They go and play with other dogs.

Have a great old time. No, your cat's anxious when you're renovating. That's the only reason we're not getting a dog. Anxious cat. Yeah. Can I have some photos of these dogs, though? Yeah, we'll get an update on those cute photos of the dogs. Play.

ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Silly little po. Silly little pole. Washing hands every time after using the toilet, yes or no? Every time. Every time. Even if it's just water after a wheeze.

Oh my God, yeah. Just a quick hand rinse. Just a rinse after the wheeze off you. Might not always be soap. Sometimes, when I pee in the middle of the night,

I will do a quick like, you know, like rinse the hand. I don't do a full soap moisturise because I'm quite allergic to soap, so I have't do a full soap moisturise because I'm quite allergic to soap so I have to do

a full moisturise afterwards right it's a rigmarole I always wondered who used the other thing beside the soap

the lotion itchy dry people like myself yeah because we've refilled Sade bought this one because it was aesthetically pleasing

yeah I know the brand they linked in like that yeah and then one's soap and one's hand lotion. Charizer. Yeah. And all I ever use is this.

We've refilled the soap about 12 times and the lotion has got a crusty bit over the spout. I hate when you're in a posh bathroom and you think the moisturizer is the soap and then you've got to wash the moisturizer off. Moist soap. Moist. Yeah.

I'll do that in a posh bathroom. I'll use the hand lotion because it always smells. Oh, do you? It's real nice. Wow. You know that brand you bought but then you just keep

filling it up with cheap palm olive? Excuse me? Aesop. Aesop. Yeah, it's Aesop Mollop. No, it's not. Why is it bright orange? Because it's antibacterial Aesop Mollop.

Okay, Aesop Mollop. Okay, Aesop Mollive. Okay, let's get into some of these disgusting comments. Because you will not believe the amount of people that don't wash their hands every time. Oh, I didn't tell you the portion. He keeps forgetting the actual poll. He does, all week. 75% of people said yes every time. Which I'm also allowing a 5% lie buffer in there.

Let's go 7. So let's go 70. Yep. And how many of them are actually washing them? Rather than just giving it a quick rinse. Tap rinse. 25% of people say no, they don't wash their hands every time they go to the toilet. I thought the pandemic had sort of like taught us a new way of washing our hands.

Well, maybe if we'd done this pre-pandemic, it would have been slightly even higher. Yeah, or higher, yeah. So this person wants to remain anonymous. But I can tell you the last time they took part in a silly little poll, they said sushi is disgusting. So this, I'm beginning to question this person. This person's an idiot. Okay, but thanks for listening.

Anonymous, please. If I don't get any wheeze or poos on my hands, I see it as a waste of time washing them. I know I'm disgusting and I'll never change. Okay, it's probably a good thing they don't get any wheeze or poos on my hands, I see it as a waste of time washing them. I know I'm disgusting and I'll never change. Okay, it's probably a good thing they don't eat sushi because you sometimes eat that with your fingers. Yeah. So raw fish and pooey hands is not good.

Is that person a male or a female? And then they'll get sick and they'll blame the sushi. Yeah. You know those people? Yeah. They blame the food, but they've got poor personal hygiene. Or that person has incredible, like, iron guts. Iron guts. Is that person, are you iron guts. Iron guts. Iron guts.

Is that person, are you able to tell if they're a male or female? It's a female. Oh, I didn't expect that. Wow. The fairer sex. A female hating sushi.

Yeah. Is she Pakeha? No, a female not washing her. A Pakeha, a female not loving sushi. Yeah. And not washing her hands. That should be

the most shocking to you. Absurd. Yeah. The next, also female. I can't believe the amount of people in your poll that don't wash their hands. Have they not heard of a pandemic? Yeah. Sometimes I pee outside and there ain't no water to wash.

I mean, I try not to put my hand in the lolly bag afterwards, but if someone offers me, you know, they don't care. What are you going to do? That's from a male. That's from a male. But it could have been from a female with what we've been dealing with so far. I don't wash my hands every time as I'm allergic to soap. Me too.

But you need a bit of Oaty Terraza. If you're out at like a mall or a bathroom, a public toilet that has like real nasty soap. Yeah. I'm, yeah. What did you say to wash it with? Oaty Terraza. Oaty Terraza. An Oaty Moisturizer. Yeah. Yeah. What did you say to wash it with? Oaty chorizo. Oaty chorizo. An oaty moisturizer.

Oh. Yeah. I thought you were taking out a chorizo with you just to... Yeah, yeah, because the fats and the oils rub off on the hands. Great for you. I always think about giving my kids a vomiting bug and how much I'd regret not washing my hands and how I'd be riddled with guilt if it ever happened.

So there you go. The guilt is making someone wash their hands. That's good. Good. Yes, at work. No, at home. I tend to piss a lot at home and I'm the only one

who fingers my mouse and keyboard. Quaint. That's from William Shakespeare. That's a modern day Shakespeare. Fingers my mouse and keyboard. Somebody said, I always wash my hands

but seeing your poll results makes me think I need to wash my hands even more to make up for the people who aren't washing my hands. When I have no skin on my hands, that is on them. This is how the Last of Us bacteria bug will start.

Yes. Zombie. Yeah, the end of humanity. What the actual F? I get that people don't always listen to Harold the Giraffe, but how did you go in the caravan and not learn about washing your hands? It's the Life Education Trust. We learned a lot in there.

Hand washing was definitely a pre-pandemic necessity. And finally, someone said, I'm super concerned that this is sitting at 25% right now. One quarter of the population are absolute filthy creatures. Not wrong. Not wrong. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, just when we thought travel was getting back to some kind of normal.

Yeah. We can go overseas if we want. Yes. You just did. Flights, flights, way more expensive. I think we talked, what, last week about international flights being 19% dearer than they were. Oh, that sucks. Yeah, like this time last year or pre-pandemic.

I think I saw an ad for specials to Europe in summer and it was like $2,900 for flights. Special. And that was a special. Okay. So gone are the days of like $1,600. And yeah, there are fewer flights and the Auckland airport floods over the weekend have caused problems for some travellers

because some travellers are stuck in Singapore because flights were just cancelled over the weekend. Because Auckland International, which is our big international airport. Underwater. Underwater. Those photos from the main terminal.

Wild days. That was insane. Wild photos. Yeah, that was insane. And there was a Dubai flight, an Emirates flight that flew 15 or 13 hours, got halfway here and then turned around, landed back in Dubai,

a 13-hour flight to nowhere. An American Airlines flight stopped in Hawaii instead, was it? hours, got halfway here and then turned around, landed back in Dubai, a 13-hour flight to nowhere. An American Airlines flight stopped in Hawaii instead, was it? Yeah, and a lot of planes were diverted to Christchurch and Wellington and the likes. But now some passengers have been told they won't be able to get to New Zealand, back to New Zealand because of the backlog, until March. It is the 1st of February today. So they're just stuck in... So there's a lot of people stuck.

Our new New Zealand flight from Singapore didn't make it. And there was, I was talking to a friend yesterday, she had a friend in Dubai and she was told the same, March. Wouldn't be bad though. Like a little month, a forced month off. No, but it wouldn't... If you had travel insurance, they could pay for your accommodation. But like a lot of people will be coming back from like Christmas holidays.

Yeah. Or holidays and you've already taken all your leave. You've got to get back to work. What are you going to do? What can you do? You're between a rock and a hard place. You can't do anything. So some people have found like they've been able to bounce around through weird countries

like going to Papua New Guinea and Brisbane and getting back to Auckland. Oh, that sounds awful. You just want to get home. I just probably stay in Dubai for the month. Same. They're like, I just couldn't possibly get home. Yeah. There's just no way.

And then a friend found business class airfares, but then they were like, well, will the travel insurance pay for this? Because it was the only seat. Oh my God. If they did though. Yeah, but you've got to pay for it and then it was the only seat? Oh my God. And then if they don't... If they did though. Yeah, but you've got to pay for it and then they pay you back.

And if they don't pay you back... Well, you've had a once in a lifetime experience. In business class. Yeah. Getting home. But yeah, all these people are stuck. So, I mean, so many bear in mind

if you're heading away soon, it's, you know, we're not out of the woods yet. Nah, this will all blow over. That's coming from absolutely no data or no research. I was going to say. It was just wishful thinking. Purely wishful thinking.

Nah, she'll be all right, mate. She'll be all right. Honestly, by the weekend, we'll be back at the beach. I've always had a huge advocate of she'll be right, and it is the Kiwi attitude, but I don't know if it's... I don't know if she will be. Does she'll be right work when you're stuck in Singapore or Dubai and they're telling you there's no flights for four weeks? Yeah, she'll be right, mate.

She'll be right. Nah, you'll get home. You'll find a way. Does travel insurance pay for you to stay somewhere for four weeks? They pay for you to stay somewhere if your flight gets cancelled, but a couple of nights. Yeah, because it's only up to a certain amount, right? Dollar-wise, depending on how much.

And then there would be people that don't have travel insurance. But the airlines don't have to because it's weather. That's on them, though. You should always get travel insurance. You're a crazy dum-dum if you don't have a season in the modern age with zero travel insurance.

Do you think people would give to my give a little for my month in Dubai at a hotel? Help me, I didn't get travel insurance. I made a silly choice. Help me pay for it now. We have already spoken about the fact that my parents paid for quite a bit of my stuff up until recently. Up until Christmas. Christmas, yeah.

But one thing I've always paid for, for them, is, well, not paid for, they have a hoon of my video subscriptions. What are they called? Streaming services. Streaming services. Subscriptions.

I'm the same because I just don't think my parents would, my parents wouldn't have it otherwise. So it's not like it's costing Netflix money because otherwise they just wouldn't use it. They wouldn't pay for it anyway. They wouldn't do it. My parents just got Fiverr. I was like, you need to be all over this.

And they've still got the Sky subscription. I'm like, nobody does that anymore. Get the satellite off the way. It's all on Neon anyway. Don't worry about it. But mum's like, I've got my stuff on my MySky. Oh, my God. My parents were so into MySky.

Happy Valley? Oh, probably. I'm about to stream all of that because the last episode's out next week. Mum loves Happy Valley. What else is on there? Have you ever seen that? It's a great show. Oh, yeah.

I watched the first episode of the new season. It's so brilliant. Zero content. Well, you haven't seen the previous. None. Oh my God, go back and watch this. That's why I stopped watching it. That's a great show.

She's fantastic. She's Coronation Street lady, eh? She's a good actress. Yeah, she's brilliant. But mum loves a bit of Blue Bloods. Loves a bit of Tom Selleck and Blue Bloods. Oh, and Mark Wahlberg's brother. Donny?

The other Wahlberg, yeah. The other Wahlberg? Yeah, mum's got a full MySkype. Does she like that show? Loves it. Loves it. Loves it. But they don't understand that it can be all on the streaming. Yeah.

Because it's all on the streaming. But anyway. Yeah. Tried to explain it. I told my dad he'd love Drive to Survive, the Formula One series on Netflix. I said, you would love this. They've got a tennis one now. Yes.

What's it called? Strikey. Strike the ball. Your parents watch The Crown. Why doesn't he watch that on Netflix? Or does your mum need to be there to press play? Oh, that's so cute. He doesn't watch stuff without mum.

Break point is actually I need to add that to mum's list. Break point on Netflix about tennis dad will love. Sorry, just doing some life admin. Anyway, so Mum texted me the other day saying, what's decent on TV for us to watch? Oh, yeah. And then we did a little bit of an exchange, and I was saying, this thing on this streaming website

and this thing on this, and she kept saying, do we have that? And I was like, yeah, yeah, you're on mine. Yeah. You know, do we have, do we have, I don't know. Do we have neon? yeah, yeah, you're on mine. You know, do we have, do we have, I don't know, do we have neon? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're on mine. What's the password? Same as always, and I'll

send it to you again. It's like literally saved on the smart TV. Yeah, yeah. Just click into it. Just click into it. No, neon's a shocker for logging you out. Oh, I had to log in last night actually, yes. Neon's a shocker for logging you out. Yeah, on the telly and you're like, oh my god, and then you've got to go click, click, click, click, yes. Neon's a shocker for logging you out. Yeah, on the telly and you're like, oh, my God. And then you've got to go click, click, click, click.

Up, up, down, find the – Oh, God. Let's get this off your chest before we launch the secret sound. We love Neon. We love Neon. It's number one. No, you're going to be wrong. Content.

Amazing, yeah. Log me out on my own smart television so I've got to go through my long password and go uppercase and across and then some numbers and say – Yeah, real first world problem, problem. Yeah, I know. Really hard. Anyway, and then I said, oh, the boys have been watching something. Then I said, oh, have you got

my Apple TV log and we can watch Slow Horses and da da da. And then I said Mirror of Kingstown, which you guys have been watching. Jeremy Renner? R.A.P. Well, he is resting in piecesP. He's not dead. Well, he is resting in pieces, though.

He's very broke. He's resting in pieces. Resting in millions of pieces. Yeah. And then I said that, which is on Prime, right? Yeah. And then mum said, do we have Amazon Prime? And mum said, do we have Amazon Prime?

And I said, yes, you're on mine. And I know this because I'll go in and I'll see the stuff that she's watching. Do you judge her? No, no, no. Does she have her own profile or do you see? No, no, she just uses mine. Oh, okay.

And then, oh, we had a quick chat about Moochie. What do you think about this? What's her clothing brand? What size are you? I like the belt. I said, I've got that. I'm a medium. She said, I need that.

What size is your mum? She'd probably go a size up. From what? Medium. Oh. She'd be like a larger, I reckon. In the belt. Well, she could rock a medium. It depends if she wants to wear it on the hips or the waist. It's beside the point. Anyway, and then she sent me a screenshot

later that night, and it's an email from Amazon saying, Patsy, it's time to renew your prime membership and she's already got a membership so she was she she was paying for one but using yours but using mine well that's all right that's fair i know but then i said check the others she said i think i've got a netflix too oh jeez so just been... I don't... Is it not in her passwords notebook that she keeps beside the computer? Shh.

I just assumed she did because that's what every mum does. I could see how she thinks, you know, she sees the payment go out, she has it, so she doesn't draw the, you know...

But she's... They only... They use all of mine. But I don't understand how people do this. But we've both been paying for it. But then, like, do it for things Like the gym

And they forget That they haven't They've been paying For the gym Or for a subscription Or if they don't go To the gym People know they're

Paying for the gym And not going No but some people don't They get a text message Every now and then From the gym Being like Are you alive

Yeah Have you suffered A debilitating injury That means you haven't Been coming in Or are you just Being a lazy shit At the moment

It's always when you're Halfway through a packet Of biscuits Yeah Or chips And you've got to Get all the dust Off your fingers So you can open up that means you haven't been coming in or are you just being a lazy shit at the moment? It's always when you're halfway through a packet of biscuits. Yeah. Or chips and you've got to get all the dust off your fingers so you can open up to see who's texting you and it's the gym and you're like, well, this stinks. Hey, Hayley, we haven't seen you in a while.

Yeah. Get some sweet deals to bring you back. The bottom of a tube of Pringles has seen me. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Cabanara Vodden Ailey. Play ZM. Cabanara is a type of pasta. What? Just your mic technique.

Yeah, I'm in the middle of trying to transfer my phone onto a different phone. Oh, I hate that process. It never goes the way that it's supposed to go. Because I've got a long streak down the left-hand side of my screen that's dead now. Like, I can't press the letter A or shift. What do you need that for? Or if I go into something like on Instagram, oh that was

let me finish this sentence then remind me to get back to that. I can't press the back button because it's in the upper left hand corner and it's a dead part of the touch screen. Right. And when you're scrolling Instagram the heart to like photos is on the left hand side of the screen and every now and then it'll just take on a life of its own and I was scrolling Instagram, the heart to like photos is on the left-hand side of the screen. And every now and then, it'll just take on a life of its own.

And I was scrolling, and it was just literally like, like. And I was just scrolling. It was like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like. Every photo I scrolled past, it was liking. Was it? Well, you're just lucky. Was it really liking all those posts? It was.

But I only followed people that mean so much to me, you know. You're just right. Remember the days when you could see what people were liking? God, I miss those days. They were the best. Well, you never like. You lurk. Lurk but don't like.

I lurk, Dad folder. If we're talking about it, it's a lurk. Okay. Not a like. The New York Times has divided the world by posting a cabanara recipe that has tomatoes in it. Now, I'm a meaty, tomatoey, pastry guy. Those are my pastas.

I'm not a creamy. Now, Cabanara is a creamy. It's a creamy. It's a white pastry. The one that I like. What was the one I liked in the packet? You'd add a little bit of butter and milk and water. And it's bacon, mushroom.

Oh, my God.'s bacon mac and cheese. Mushroom. Oh my god, bacon and cheese. And either microwave it or put it in the pot for 10 minutes. Man, that stuff was good, eh? Yeah, it was really... Man, that stuff was so tasty. It certainly filled a spot. So traditionally, Cabanara is an Italian pasta dish from Rome made with eggs, hard cheese, cured pork,

you said bacon, and black pepper. Yes. Yum. The cheese is usually pecorino, romano, parmigiano, reggiano, or a combination of the two. Yum. A hard Italian cheese. A bit of grated Colby if that's all you've got in the fridge. Yeah.

Or again, the packet stuff is fine. Yeah, or just some slices, Chesedale. Slices on top. Yeah, that doesn't melt very well. Jamie Oliver. I've just clicked on his. This is the top result when you search for Cabanara recipe. Eggs, cheese, higher welfare pancetta.

What does that mean? Happy pigs before they're murdered. Ah! Okay. I like that. You can taste the happiness. What does that mean? Happy pigs before they're murdered Okay You can taste the happiness Dried spag, garlic Only one clove of garlic? Who was I talking to about this recently? Oh my god no it's five

Exactly Gotta have a lot of garlic On Monday night when I got booze with my mates We were talking about garlic And how if it says one clove of garlic You're putting in five Yeah Or one teaspoon of minced garlic

You're like no half, half the jar. Never enough garlic. I want the garlic burning my eyes. So what was the New York Times recipe that has divided the internet? It had tomato in it, changing the entire colour of the pasta to a spaggy, like a spag bowl. No, absolutely not. I love a tomato pasta, but if you're calling it carbonara,

it's bacon and cheese. Yeah. It's white. I just love tomato. Tomato's one of my absolute favourites. When people are like, I'll have the burger, but no tomato, I'm like, what's wrong with you? I don't like tomato.

It's a bit sloppy. Unless it's in a sauce. Pickles totally belong on. It's got terrible integrity, structurally. Tomatoes. Yeah. Aren't they exciting? They're acidic and yuck. Just a quick flash poll this morning. It's got terrible integrity structurally. Tomatoes. Yeah. Aren't they exciting?

They're acidic and yuck. Just a quick flash poll this morning. Do tomatoes belong in a carbonara? Only 6% of people saying yeah. That's sick in the head. And 94% nah. So, I mean, people have spoken. I don't think the people that said yeah know what a carbonara is. They're probably thinking it's a spag bol or something.

Spaghetti carbonara. The five rules to make real carbonara according to They're probably thinking it's a spag bol or something. Spaghetti carbonara. The five rules to make real carbonara according to Italianspurn.com. Well, we can trust them. They're Italian. Choose the right pasta and cook al dente. Traditionally, it's made with spaghetti. But I like when you're making something and you run out,

like you haven't got enough spaghetti to do spaghetti bolognese, so you add in some macchi. Some penne. Some elbows. No, I don't like, I like the flat for cabanara. Oh, no, but if you don't have the right pasta. I love a spagbog with like a penne or some kind of weird thing.

It's got all different sort of stuff in here. Lasagna sheets at a pinch. If you want to create an authentic spaghetti cabanara, you should use guanciale, an Italian cured pork product from the cheek. Yum. The pork cheek, ladies and gentlemen. The pork cheek is the unsung hero of the body of the pig. Otherwise, if you're vegan or vegetarian, use some leaves or something.

Yeah, they make bacon out of... Bacon. Banana leaves. Okay, yeah, yeah. Banana skin. There you go. Honestly, you couldn't tell the difference. No cream, Okay, yeah, yeah. Banana skin. There you go. Honestly, you couldn't tell the difference. No cream, milk, or extra ingredients.

The secret to a real carbonara starts with the right ingredients. Pasta, pancetta, lard, or butter, but no milk. No, it's eggs that make it creamy. When you said lard, I got a little bit excited. I love lard. A little lard. Yes, good stuff. All right, well, there we go. Ah, we're out. La la la la la la. La la. Yes. Good stuff.

All right, well, there we go. Don't put tomatoes on. And safely say no tomatoes in the Cabinara. No. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Now, there was a couple that took to Reddit to ask a question. Something that people, their friends and stuff were saying that's a bit odd and so they wanted to

put it to the internet for the real answer. Never ask the internet. Always ask the internet. Never. And their question was about the fact that they're going on holiday soon. They were going to Barcelona. Okay. Oh, Barcelona. Oh my god, Barcelona. Oh, the food.

Delicious. Anyway, so they were going on holiday. Oh, the food. Delicious. Anyway, so they were going on holiday. Oh, the food. I just remembered the tapas. Tapas. Tapas. But what about the people? Oh my God, the people still laugh.

What about the people and the sound from the music? The tapas in the Barcelona. We will dance. We will dance. The forbidden dance. Oh. In Barcelona. I shall meet you on Las Ramblas.

Oh, Las Ramblas. Where our hearts became intertwined. I don't think you'd make it out of Barcelona with all that food. And roll into Barcelona. I roll out of Barcelona. Have they finished Sagrada Familia yet? No, it's an ongoing situation. Don't you dare ask if we're finished. Sagrada Familia.

We've been having a fiesta. No, with all this fiesta, we can't. We haven't done many Tabatha. Anyway, they were going to Barcelona, and they had decided that they don't have similar interests't all been to Tabatha. Anyway, they were going to Barcelona and they had decided that they don't have similar interests in terms of things they like to do while travelling. She likes to have a shop and, you know,

look around some of the pretty bars and whatnot. And he likes to go to the military museums and maybe do a bit more people watching. And these are just different ways that they choose, well, that they like to enjoy their holiday. Right. So they said, instead of me ruining your day, like me ruining your shopping day

by coming along and being like, oh God, can we go? I'm hungry or whatever. Or the other person going to a military museum and being like, I don't care. Yeah. They decided to take it one or two days each in each city that they were going to be exploring

to just separate and go and enjoy the day how they please and then meet up later. Probably on Las Ramblas for some beautiful tapas. Were they staying at the same hotel or staying apart? Yeah, so they were staying together. I don't see that as being odd. I know, but a lot of people were like,

why? It's like, truly you're not making enough effort to get into that person's interests. We just said before how expensive it is to go overseas. You're going to tell me if we go to Paris and you want to go to the Louvre Museum and I want to go shopping? Well, you just said how expensive it was and you want to go shopping. Why are you out to absolutely bankrupt us on this holiday? Nothing will stop me. But do you know what I mean? Like that we're going to spoil each other's day by knowing that the other

person doesn't want to be there. Some people aren't that independent. Like they would freak out travelling alone or walking around the city alone. So those kind of people wouldn't handle that. Yeah. But then I'm the same. I don't want to, I wouldn't like a holiday where I was sitting on a beach for 10 days

on an island and you couldn't go anywhere else in there. See, I think we'd holiday well together. Yeah. Because I like to mix it up. I like to sort of maybe start in a pool and then end the day by the pool. But in the middle, I need to be doing something. Some hustle and bustle. I can't just sit around.

Trying to think, like, I think maybe once or twice when Aaron and I have travelled together, we've gone, well, I'm just going to go over here. If you want to go back to the hotel for a nap, I might just walk around for a bit on my own and try not to get mugged. Don't feel bad if I do because you need a nap. Yeah, yeah. But so what did the internet say? Some people are like, I think this is a great idea.

You know, like, why not? They're both adults. They're entitled to have their own fun. And as long as they sort of meet up at the end of the day and, you know, they're not losing each other, why not? But then a lot of people are saying, yeah, it's lazy and stupid and you should go somewhere you both enjoy. A lot of people don't understand it.

So I wanted to know and take some calls of what you have in your relationship that maybe people don't understand. Or find a bit unusual because some people do separate beds. Some people do separate beds.

Maybe you're married. I know a married couple that don't live in the same house. What about, do you know anyone that they holiday but at different times

individually? Like, would you ever go? I did lots of overseas travel without Aaron when we were first together. But you were marching. I was marching. And then he went to clown school in France

and I didn't go. Don't laugh at clown school. It's a very serious school. Yeah, that sentence, just for listeners, that sentence was real. It was real. It was real. He's been numerous times.

It's real, yeah. Yep. 9am, how to attach your red nose. 10am, clown icons. Yeah. Ronald, yeah. Yep. 9 a.m. How to attach your red nose. 10 a.m. Clown icons. Yeah. Ronald McDonald 101. Yeah, they did Ronald.

How big were his shoes? Did he still have... No, it's like French clown. It's not like American clown. Oh, okay. So he's... It's very prestigious. Put a mime there in the afternoon.

Put a mime. Put a mime there in the afternoon. Put a melodrama. Put a mask. Yeah. So some couples would, yeah, holiday together. Some would have separate afternoon. Put a mellow drama. Put a mask. So some couples would holiday together. Some would have separate beds. Some would do things individually.

Yeah, is there something in your relationship, a way that you guys like to be, that people find hard to understand? Well, there'd be couples that have passcards that some couples wouldn't understand. Absolutely. When you're out of town. Have open relationships.

And yeah, someone's away, they're like, well, if you're away, have fun. Have a little tootie poopie. And the other person's like, yeah, I love that. It's all good. Absolutely. And we don't need to talk about it when we get back. We'll just do the dishes and watch some TV. Yeah. And it's not, you know, traditional. So people will struggle to understand it. Well, 0800DARLS.M. Give us a call now.

Text her as well. 9696. What do people struggle to get or understand about your relationship? Yeah, maybe something you do differently. Give us a call. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, we'll update you soon with the news at 8 o'clock. The rainfall overnight in Auckland,

Northland, the Coromandel, there has been a lot of rain. They were just tweeting that over the past 24 hours the Western Springs Climate Station, so right by the zoo, Western Springs in Auckland, had 71 millimetres of rain in the past 24 hours. Now that's as much as one month.

Again. What's happening? What's happening? And a lot of that was in three hours. I saw yesterday some people putting up some old, like 1930s photos of flooding in Auckland when it's happened before.

Yeah. And all these people were being like, oh, I thought climate change meant we'd have floods that only just started in the last 10 years. I don't believe in climate change

and this is the proof. It's like, no, because it's happened twice in 18 months. Yeah. Ask people out west of Auckland that have been flooded twice in 18 months and lost everything. Yeah.

All right. Right now, though, talking about a couple that went to Reddit to ask if their relationship was a little odd. Yeah, because when they travel, they take plenty of time apart to go and do the things that they want to do without each other. Which I think is cool. I'm into it. So we want to know maybe the unconventional or the things that people don't understand about your relationship. Now Sol joins us. Good morning, Sol.

Sol-y. Sol-y. Sol-y. Sorry. Now what do people not get about your relationship? Well, we're happily married and we live in different apartments. Oh, okay. How long have you been married for?

Just over a year now. Why did you choose to keep separate apartments rather than a little romantic home together? Well, we're a little bit older and it just evolved and we just really enjoy it. We just enjoy having our own space. She's got her dogs, I've got my cats and you get to go home and

be ugly by yourself and then we get to enjoy each other's company each day. But you would say Sully that you've got a strong marriage. Like it's not a sign of not liking each other. Yeah, no, we love each other and she's the love of my life and we just

enjoy our time together. When we get together we go for a walk each day and then we spend the weekends together and we do a lot of fun things but our relationship is all about joy and happiness. Solid! I want what you've got! You'd be happy with what you've already got. It doesn't sound bad does it? But what about, so at night you're just on your own then during the week? What about snuggles on the couch? What about snuggles on the couch? Oh, no, we hang out together as much as we want to,

and then we go home and we talk over the text and we're just spread out and being ugly at home if we've had a rough day at work. I love that. And then I get to spread out on the bed and I get to snore away all night. True. So that's why. Someone's a snorer.

Is that why? So, like, thank you so much for your call. Some messages in. From people that have got something happening in their life that people don't understand in their relationship. Someone said that my partner and I have a girlfriend together. Oh, yeah. And people struggle to understand that.

Yeah, a third. Okay. That's not like, a third. Okay. It doesn't sound like it's equal footing in the relationship, does it? It sounds like they're a third lower tier member. Yeah, yeah, so there's the A team. Until someone gets feelings. Someone's always going to get feelings.

Keep your texts coming in, 9696 0800 dials at M. The unconventional things... In your relationship. Yeah. We've asked you if you and your partner have something unconventional

that people find hard to understand. There's a couple that travel separately. We're hearing stories. Natalie, you guys have some interesting cuddles. That's one way to put it, absolutely. So cuddles with two and three other people. Yes, that's right. That's probably a good way of putting it.

Do your friends know and do they just think it's absolutely outrageous or bizarre? They certainly do. There's different comments that come through. One particular friend who I thought would be the most accepting actually warned me against it and just outright said, don't do this. Don't do it. Really?

Was this something you established at the top of your relationship or something that slowly came in as an idea? I mean, it was never something that we always sort of thought would happen. But after the years gone by, actually, it came up in conversation. And yeah, let's do it. And ever since, I tell you what, it's brought us closer together as a couple and yeah where most people yeah more than

you'd believe I highly recommend it highly recommend the threes and the fours alright okay well extra people to cuddle I guess say no more

yeah say no more say no more say no more we really delicately danced around that didn't we proud of us I was lost

I didn't know what you two were talking about. Oh, vanilla smoothie. Three thumbs. Four thumbs. Three thumbs. Or golf.

Yes. I think they call it Ambrose. Ambrose, is it? She's doing Ambrose. I think we're just doing some Ambrose. Some messages in to finish.

My partner and I have separate holidays, somebody said. It was very unusual. It even took a little bit of getting used to from my side of the fence. But we just had really different ideas of what we wanted to do. And rather than argue about it, we said, well, why don't we just take separate holidays? You go to Canada and I'll go to Thailand.

Yeah. I'd love a trip to Thailand on my own. I would love it. You'd just be $5 massages all day. Massage, food, shop. Massage, food, shop. You don't do the feed and the fish, though. Don't do the feed and the fish.

I don't do feed and fish. I don't think they're doing the feed and the fish anymore. Don't do the feed and the fish anymore. I don't think we do that. No, we don't do that anymore. Yuck. Not because it's cancelled. You just, it's yuck.

It's a bit yuck. Yeah. My fiance and I went to couples therapy when nothing was wrong. What? Do you know what? Yeah. There's that podcast, Where Should We Begin? by Esther Peral, who's a very well-known couples therapist.

And she said, don't come when you're in blood at the end of your crisis. Come when you're good and just be like, we're doing a little tune-up. It's like a car. We're on a fitness. This couple went because they were going to have a baby and they just wanted to make sure their communications were, like, intact and in a good working order before the first baby was born. There was nothing wrong with our relationship,

but all we just wanted to help with communication before we got exhausted because by then it would have been too far gone. But that is something that people would find weird. Two years in, we've never had an argument because our communication's so good. We've organised a wedding, sold and bought a house and moved cities and had a baby and there's not been an argument in the mix. Oh, wow. Jesus, I can't even decide what we're having for dinner with that absolute...

You're saying, oh, fine then. Ding, ding, ding. You don't need to snap at me. Fighters to the her. Absolutely. Oh, fine then. You don't need to snap at me. Fighters to the corners. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. I've been absolutely delighting in just zhooshing up my new kitchen.

It's been renovating. It must be nice. But we didn't have anything to put in it. Like, no good utensils. Mine are all, like, turmeric stained and old. Yeah. What are you talking, like, not knives and forks. You're talking the big drawer utensils.

You're cooking utensils. Can I ask a question as well? Where do you get nice utensils from? Because I feel like I've been everywhere. We just go to Briscoe's and wait for a sale. No, I want some, like, nice ones. I want some nice. What's a nice?iscoe's and wait for a sale. I want some like nice ones. I want some nice. What's a nice?

Because they're going to be in display because I bought a little display. You've got to go to like artisan markets and find crafters. Like wooden, teak. Yes, yes, yes. People who get old, you know, floorboards and beams and craft them into spoons and such. When I've got old joists, Remo, you could make me something on the lathe. Okay, I could do that. Can you make me like a five set?

No, because then you'll be like one of those parents and little Timmy comes home from intermediate with some stupid clock or table and you've got to have it in your house for the next 30 years. It looks bloody stupid. I wish you got better on the lathe in time for this. Lathe.

Lathe. Lathe. We all have it at a garage. Now it's on the floor. But then I read, can you lat better on the lathe in time for this. Lathe? Lathe. Lathe. We haven't had a garage. Now it's on the floor. But then I read, can you lathe on the floor? And it's not recommended because it's a dangerously low. Very dangerous. Yeah.

Low height. What about like just wait for a 50%, 60% off Briscoes and get like all the KitchenAid utensils? They're pretty sexy. Yeah, I did get the KitchenAid pots at a 70% off. Oh. Could be, but I want them now. Right.

Veruca, sweetheart, I want it now. Sorry. Anyway, so I went out yesterday with a small list. I wanted a solid... Fletcher's or Gus's club? And I am Mike TV. You're definitely Mike TV.

I'm on the TV now. What is it? When he's like, can it, mom. Oh, the rude one. No, no, that's Mike TV. You're Charlie Bucket. No, he's not Charlie Bucket. I don't want to get sunk up the chocolate pipe.

You're the other guy. You're the other girl then. Veruca Salt and oh um violet's turning violet because i would probably take something off your conveyor belt and eat it yeah yeah yeah definitely yeah you like chewing gum definitely violent yeah have we just done a buzzfeed which charlie and the chocolate factory character are you yeah we have i think it's so obvious original 1970s oh absolutely absolutely watched Shit Again the other day. So funny. No, I still get scared when they do the roundy thing.

And he's like, and they're going down the thing. And he starts talking about how it's going faster. And he's yelling at the children. Where the row is going. Yeah. And it's so, so, so, so. And then there's like slugs on the walls and stuff. That's scowling.

They're like decapitated chicken. Man, they were on some drugs. Yeah, it was a wild movie. Anyway, how did we get here? I want it now. You want it now. I want these nice utensils now because I went into a store and I bought a utensil jar. Okay.

So I went and I couldn't find the utensils and I went and I bought tea towels. Yeah. Country road. Oh, must be nice. I had a $20 voucher so it cost me $4. And then I bought salt and pepper grinders. Yeah. Fancy ones.

I like a grinder. Yeah, I've never had one. Huh? No one? Salt, pepper, homosexuals, all of the grinders. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Himalayan. Because you know Peugeot, the car brand,

this was a fact of the day once, Peugeot before they were a car, were salt and pepper grinders. They still do that. They sent some in. To be honest, not that impressed. Really? One of them's already not worth really grinding anymore. Because do you know who's got a crunchy grind?

Pam's. You know when you buy the rock salt in a plastic grinder from the supermarket? God, they've got a crunchy grinder. I love it. Can you refill it? Yeah. Okay, good. But I just want to display ones.

Like, they're not to be touched. They're to be displayed. Do you want like a long paper grinder? No, I didn't want the long paper grinder. It won't fit underneath my... Say when. Grind, grind, grind, grind, grind, grind, grind, grind, grind, grind, grind. Sir, you're costing the restaurant thousands of dollars.

Shut up. Shut up and keep grinding. You said when and I did not say stop. So I went and bought the... I said, I've got a pot holder for the utensils. They're TBC because I can't find nice ones. Salt and pepper grinders and new say stop. So I went and bought the, I said, I've got a pot holder for the utensils. They're all TBC because I can't find nice ones. Salt and pepper grinders and new tea towels.

And then this is the, this is the level of sex in my relationship with Aaron. Yeah. I got home and I had the bags

of stuff and I said, hey Aaron, go sit in that chair. Oh. Now he might be thinking, lap dance. Yeah.

For the first time in his damn life. I bet it's exactly what he was thinking. lap dance. Yeah. For the first time in his damn life. I bet that's exactly what he was thinking. Lap dance? But no, I said, close your eyes. And I could see he was kind of peeking, so I put a blindfold on him. Now he's thinking. He's definitely thinking lap dance now.

Now he's thinking something else. But what I did was I set up the salt and pepper grinder and the little pot holder for the utensils and hung the towels over the oven bar. Yeah. And then I got him up and walked him to the best view of it. And I did a full reveal.

Now, in any other relationship, you'd be bloody disappointed, wouldn't you? Yes. When you thought you were getting a lap dance. And you're getting a salt and pepper grinder. He was elated. His first words were like, oh my God. As elated getting a lap dance. And you're getting a salt and pepper grinder. He was elated. His first words were like, oh my God, those are nice. As elated as a lap dance. To be decided.

Right, to be determined. They're not my language of love. No. Lap dancers. But he was truly, he gave me exactly what I wanted, which was a big ooh, ah, that's nice. But then he made an outlandish suggestion. He looked at the salt and pepper grinder, which is really...

Not to be touched. Not to be touched. They're French. Wait, so if I come over for dinner or something that requires salt, I'm... You use the Pam's grinder. I've got to use the Pam's grinder. Even though you've got a nice grinder. You've got a nice grinder, though.

But look at... Don't touch my grinder. We used to have the mortar and pestle in the old house. No, you can't touch it. Yeah, no, don't touch it. Or it'll get stained. the mortar and pestle in the old house. No, you can't touch it. Yeah. No, don't touch it. What, it gets stained? It's the late-making magic potions, isn't it?

Actual guests come over. They'll get to use the French ones. Are we not actual guests? No, no, no. I'm not trying to impress you. You get panned. It's a crunchy grind. It's a good grind.

It's a good grind. Anyway, but Aaron was looking at it, and then he made this outlandish suggestion, which reminded me that I am marrying his father. Yeah. He was like, I think we should iron the tea towels. What? Who?

He doesn't want you to iron bed sheets, does he? People that iron bed sheets? He would. And I was like, the point is that they're crinkled and it's warm and inviting. He's like, I don't like them. It's crinkled. So yeah, I'm going to marry a man who wants it. How crinkled are they?

They're like linen crinkled. Oh, linen crinkled. Oh, linen. If we're talking about Sexy stuff that happened In our kitchens yesterday Oh yeah I got home And my wife was as hungover

As I was yesterday Perhaps even more so We had a blowout Monday night Silly start to the week Yep Do not recommend Yeah

I got home And I said Oh what's this sausage for There was a sausage On the bench And she said A single sausage A singular sausage.

She said I dropped it when I was getting the plate of sausages out of the fridge. And I said, are there any sausages left? And she said, I ate them all and I rinsed that sausage under the tap and I ate it. Yeah, you did. Dude, there's a cost of living crisis. What, you're going to throw it out? I wanted the sausage.

And she was sitting at the table and she started going It dropped on the floor and she started going... It dropped on the floor and she started having a bit of that and I was just like... You had floor sausage. I had floor sausage. Man, what a...

Hot rinse or cold rinse? Wait, did you rinse it? Ooh, don't rinse the sausage warm. I rinsed it under the tap. No, warm, and then it heats the sausage. It was halfway between cold and hot, so I guess that's warm, isn't it?

Room team floor sauce. It was a warm rinse of the sausage. It was halfway between cold and hot, so I guess it's warm, isn't it? Room temperature sausage. It was a warm rinse of the sausage. A lukewarm sauce. Wow, what sexy afternoons we had. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. The NHS, the British National Health Sorcerer's Stone, have got a quiz at the moment where you can do a quick quiz and it'll kind of point you in the direction of how healthy you are.

You might look all right, you might feel all right, but what's around the corner? Yeah. Uh-oh, I've just got to the question. If you had to have one, which one would you usually pick? And option A is burger. Oh, God.

So it's called How Are You, right? Yes. And it asks you questions. How are you feeling right now? Really knackered, full of beans, can't run for a bus. Can run for miles. Wound up or calm. I'm answering. Sleepless nights

have it though. I always sleep like a baby. Not my best or fitter than ever? No. Down in the dumps, over the moon. I'm over the moon. Having a good day. Right. So this is a quiz that tells you how fit you are. Yeah. Now let's take a look at the strongest stuff. Do you drink alcohol?

Yes. Which days of a normal week do you drink? I have a drink. I wouldn't call it drinking. I have a... Okay, this is confronting. When you start making excuses like that for yourself, I feel like you need to be a little bit more aware of your situation. I'm at the part of, apart from not getting ill,

what are your top three health priorities? Fat dumpers not on here. Yeah, no, but it's fitting into jeans, so you could go to... I want to fill out the jeans. I want to fill out the jeans. I also feel like doing this after summer holidays is a bit confronting as well. Yeah.

Doing like, yeah, how much you exercise and how much you drink. Yeah, yeah. Very confronting. God. Let's have a look at what you're eating. What kind of choice would you usually make? Sugary drink, diet drink, water? I love a water.

Right. I love a water too. There's also a bit that says how often do you smoke? And do you remember you got drunk at the weekend and had three menthols, so you're going to have to. I had a couple of menthes. Yeah. Auntie Hayley was on the menthols.

On the menthe. Yeah. Every now and then. If youhos. On the menthe. Yeah. Every now and then. If you had to, which one would you usually pick? I got a 10. You got a 10. I got a healthy.

Plain porridge, whole grains cereal. I'll go plain porridge. Although there was a question that said, if you had to choose one of these, it was like chips, boiled potato,

roast potato, or jacket potato. I went roast, but I mean, if I had to, I'd go chips. I went D, all of the above. So you lied. I went rose, but I mean, if I had to, I'd go chips. I went D all of the above. So you lied.

You got 10, but you lied. Well, I love roast potato. That was my favorite. I only picked one. Right. But you said you'd go chips.

You said you picked roast potato, but you'd go chips. You're supposed to pick what you'd go. No, but I'm being healthy. I'll go for a roast. I got six.

One of mine didn't turn. Which snacks do you normally eat in a day? Some chocolate and sweets. Some unsalted nuts. It's not a bad idea. My eating and drinking was the problem. Do you drink alcohol? My moving and my not smoking was two green lights.

The other ones were orange lights. Which days do you normally do a drink? Thursday, Friday. It's not a bad little thing, is it? No. To give you an idea of where you can improve if you want to be healthier. Yeah. But it's not news to anybody.

No. Okay. So you can Google how are you NHS quiz and you'll find the link to it. I'm just going to quickly finish mine because I feel like I feel like you're going to be a 7 or an 8. There's no one quite as smug as someone who's never smoked. Like yourself.

When the last question is, do you smoke? Yes. How much a day? No, I quit. Or no, I never have. I say, as I've just clicked that I drink way too much. Did it say anything about vaping? Was that an option?

It wasn't in there. It wasn't in there, which was interesting. No question about vaping. Although maybe it's still a grey area medically. It also chucks in a couple of curly questions and they're like, who depends on you being healthy? Oh yeah, I just put my cat.

That was an option. I had pets, parents, children, partner. I had a lot. That was a heavy load of people that I'm trying to stay healthy for. They're trying to guilt trip you into staying healthy. Yeah, for other people. You got an eight.

Oh, seven. It's dropping. She's got a six, five other people. You got an eight. Or seven. It's dropping. She's got a six, five, four. Oh no, it's a countdown. I think I got a seven because of the menti, the menti.

The menti bees at the weekend. They had on the weekend. Alright, well you can Google that if you want to do it yourself. It's the NHS How Are You quiz. Yeah.

Play it. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. quiz. Yeah. Play ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. You okay? Yep. Great. Today's fact of the day comes to us from NASA. Who's saying? No. Okay.

NASA, North American Space, not the former captain of England. Yeah. And now commentator. Yeah. Okay. But he might know this fact. I don't know. But he's not given it to me.

Right. Today's fact of the day from NASA is that in the 60s Okay let me Take a step back 1960s Okay NASA Space race Let's get to the moon They said baby

Let's do it Let's get up there Had they invented the pillows Yet The memory foam pillows Memory foam pillows No not for general consumption Okay

By the public But memory foam was A thing at this stage Did I tell you I don't think I've told you But travelling with my Memory foam pillow Huge success

How was it Huge success Didn How was it? Huge success. Didn't leave it in any Airbnbs. Well, I would have. Huge success. Huge success. Huge success.

Is this the memory foam pillow we all got? Yeah. Huge success. I'm going to take mine away to Wellington tomorrow. Are you really? Huge success. For one night? Yeah, huge success. Huge success.

Great sleeps every night. I might take mine away because I'm staying in Wellington. I've got a stag do this weekend. I don't trust where we've booked. Tell my neck and back that. Oh, yeah, you're old. My neck, my back, my pillow and my backpack. When you said the P, I got really scared.

Same. No, I wouldn't say that because I'm a gentleman. And you've got a mortgage to pay. Pardon me? And you've got a mortgage to pay. Can't afford to lose this job. Oh, I can't afford to lose this job I know, same. No, I wouldn't say that because I'm a gentleman. And you've got a mortgage to pay. Pardon me? And you've got a mortgage to pay. Can't afford to lose this job. Oh, can't afford to lose this job. Yeah, right.

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Well, hydrogen, of course, is the propellant that sends the spaceship skywards for the people at NASA. Liquid hydrogen, hell of a fuel source. But if you've seen them when they go bad they're very explosive yeah I mean it's the explosive quality that makes it a great

propellant fuel but also flames from hydrogen burn invisible so it's just like so a hydrogen flame burns completely invisibly so if you had a leak

a leak in a hydrogen tank or a leak in a hydrogen pipe and it was on fire you wouldn't see it until it was burning you at crazy degrees. Right. So in the 1960s, this has changed now. Yeah. But in the 1960s, how the engineers in charge of the pipes

and all the hydrogen transfer would check for fires or they would walk around holding a broom in front of them. And if the broom bristles caught on fire, then there was a hydrogen fire. A broom? A broom. That was as simple as it was. Wouldn't the broom catch on fire quite quickly, though,

and run up the stalk? No, the bristles. It would be a long bristled broom. Right, and they'd just burn off. And if you saw that burning, then there was a hydrogen fire. And because it was so hot, although invisible, it was so hot, it would light the bristles instantaneously. Oh, so you're saying if there was a leak and it was on fire,

it wouldn't just be a leak that wasn't on fire. No, the leak is on fire. It's on invisible fire. Right. Because you'd hear the hissing, but you wouldn't necessarily see that it was on fire. Right. And wouldn't necessarily see that it was on fire. Right. And how you would see that it was on fire was

you'd walk around with a broom in front of you. Yeah. Sort of like the canary in the coal mine situation. Except the broom would then just burst into flames. How much was that guy getting paid? Not enough. Definitely not. Not enough.

Just walking around with a broom waiting for the thing to catch on fire. Yeah. And what do they do now? They've got something called hydrogen detection tape. And it's a tape and it's taped around places. And when it detects hydrogen, it changes colour. So you'll know that there's a hydrogen leak by the fact that, oh, the tape's changed colour now.

It's like the Tesla cars that change colour in the rain. I want to watch a rocket take offoff, like, around near Gizzy. That'd be cool. Oh, the Mahe Peninsula? Yeah. Do they, like, have a list of when they're doing that? Yeah, how do we get invited? Let's do a show from down there.

I don't know. Yeah, that'd be fun. Oh, we'll see you there. So I've never seen a rocket take-off. How cool would that be? No. Do they have a place in America and watch the Cape Canaveral as they take off? Oh, yeah, that'd be pretty amazing.

Yeah, that'd be cool. Okay. Okay. Interesting. But I don't know if Rocket Labs has a timetable of when it takes off. You can't book online?

For a seat? Probably take your own. Probably take your own fold-out BYO pick-up chair. Take out MacPacks. MacPack camping chairs. Yeah.

So today's fact of the day is to find hydrogen leaks and fires in the 1960s, it's crazy. We were sending people further away from Earth than they've ever been before, but our fire detection was a man walking around holding out a broom. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletchford and Hayley.

Play ZM. All right, the impossible phone-in topic. Hayley, you found something you think would be hard to beat. Yeah, really hard to beat. I really doubt that we're going to beat it. There is someone who has shared online, a traveller. That's what they do with their life. They have been officially to every country in the world.

Now, how many countries in the world? Oh, man. 218? 18? 200 and... Oh, 197. 95. 195?

Yeah. With some sovereign states or something. Yeah. There's some things that don't quite qualify as a country, eh? Yeah. Like Vatican City? No, but isn't that a country? That's a country.

But it's just the tiniest because it's within... It's within a town. Anyway, so this person has travelled the world, been to 195 UN recognised countries. So there you go. Okay. Around the globe. And I was just like, that's crazy.

I've been to what I would say is a lot. Yeah. You know, I've been lucky enough to travel with my sport and for theatre and whatnot. Do you put on your Instagram 17 countries and counting? No. But I would need to

update it because I did go to Bali. I haven't added Indonesia to it. Yeah. Although, this is where you can pick holes in people like this that say I've been to every country. Have you been to every country or have you just touched a tiny bit of it? Like, have you been to every island in Indonesia? Have you done the North and South Island? That's impossible, though.

Yeah. But do you know what I mean? Like, some people just fly in. And like, what's a country and what's a region and what's a... Do you have, like, how long did it take them? They've been going since 2018, so five years. God, that's pandemic time. And also did they win a lotto?

Like man, how much did you spend travelling the world? Yeah. You've had some financial help at that point, haven't you? They're actually a couple. They're two women. They're in a relationship they said some of their travels were really difficult because they're in a same sex They said some of their travels were really difficult because they're in a same-sex relationship.

Yeah, they would have been like, this is just my friend. There are 70 countries in the world where same-sex relationships are still criminalised. That's insane, isn't it? That's a whole debate for another day. Isn't that just...

Yeah. Awful thought. You forget about things like that, don't you? I know. We're so free and gay here. And we just got our first gay all black. We did.

Yes. Well, not actively black. That's a great story. Did you see Brad Weber on the news last night? What a fantastically spoken young man. Yeah, he's great. He, yeah. It's great.

We've got a gay All Black. And he's like, this is great because some of the language that gets used in high school rugby would put people off if they were gay. Yeah, totally. And now that this has happened, let's start putting a stop to that and we can have more gay All Blacks. Because someone's sexuality shouldn't count against them on the field. You want the best team on the field, don't you? Oh my God.

It doesn't influence how you bloody pick up a ball. No. Or does it? Anyway. Anyway. Anyway. Or does it? Anyway, this got me thinking, surely no one listening can claim that they've been to every country in the world.

UN recognised countries. Which is 195, did I say that? No, 100 and... I mean, there may be someone that's come close. So this is my thing. So could we take a competition? If you think you might have been to the most countries in the world, even if your number is like 50, to me then I'm like, whoa, that's heat.

That's a lot. And we'll try to beat it. If you went all around Europe in a month or two, like people do, or on the L.A. to end up zigzagging all over Europe over a few, you're taking off a few, yeah. Same with Africa, right? Like you can go to like one kind of big continent and then go tick, tick, tick, tick with Africa, right? Yeah. You can go to one kind of big continent and then go tick, tick, tick, tick, tick

by just travelling around. So I don't even have a... I mean, Fletch, you've been to lots of countries. Do you have a ballpark figure? I don't even have a number, no. I feel like mine would be 20. Do you just look at a list of countries on Wikipedia and tick them off?

I guess you could do that. Been there, been there. Been there, tick, tick, tick. I don't know. I bought you that scratchy do that. Been there, been there. Been there, tick, tick, tick. I don't know. I bought you that scratchy thing that time. Yeah, I know. Scratchy map. And you scratch off the countries you've been to.

Scratching it. Yeah, I can't remember how many I scratched. Well, look, the starting figure can be 20. If you've been to more than 20. How close can you get to 195 countries? Or maybe you're listening, or you know someone that's been to every single country. Yeah. 0800 DARS at M, we want you to give us a call.

You can text as well, 9696. Have you been to the most countries? Somebody is bragging. I know. It's a little humble brag. They've been to all the countries in the world. Is that a humble brag or just a brag? That's just a brag, countries in the world. Is that a humble brag or just a brag? That's just a brag, right?

Yeah. That's just a brag. There's nothing humble about it. But in lots of the countries this couple, two women posed as sisters so that they didn't get arrested. Oh yeah, right. So we asked if you listening, who out of you listening has been to

the most countries in the world? Brooke, good morning. Hi, how are you? Good. How many countries have you visited? I think I've been to 56. Whoa. Okay, because I've just been going through the Wikipedia list of countries.

I've only just got a third of the way through it. And Hayley and Vaughan won't let me count airports where I've transferred but haven't set foot in the country. Are you counting airports which you've transferred? No, I haven't counted airports, but there's this app and it's called Bean and you can literally go through and like tackle your countries that you've been to and they're like

the UN countries or whatever. So it gives you like a percentage of how much of the world you've been to. What's it called again? Bean. Bean? Oh, Bean. B-E-E-N.

Yeah, just like B-E-E-N. Yeah, so you're like, been there, done that. So, Brooke, do you have a goal? Because you've got this app going and it tells you a percentage. Do you have a goal to go to more? Yeah, for sure. Like, I'll never stop travelling, I don't think. Yeah, I'm the same.

It's so great, isn't it? Oh, good for you. Brooke, amazing. Thanks for your call. Let'm the same. It's so great, isn't it? Good for you. Brooke, amazing. Thanks for your call. Let's go to Paula. How many countries, Paula? I'm thinking around 90. Wow.

That's a good innings, Paula. Is there a reason or just because you love to travel? Yeah, I'd love to travel, but I went over to Steve's when I was 20 and just got the bug and I just wanted to go everywhere after that. Oh, my gosh. That's so cool. And do just got the bug, and I just wanted to go everywhere after that. Oh, my gosh. Oh, that's so cool. And do you have the bug to keep going? Yeah, well, sort of running out.

You've got 100 to go. Yeah, but I know that, like, Oman and all those funny little... I don't know if I've been to Oman. It's beautiful. Oh, I want to go, but, like, Africa, there's 52, I think. I think I've done 26, and I don't know if I need to see the other 26. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, once you've seen Africa, there's 52, I think. I've done 26, and I don't know if I need to see the other 26. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, once you've seen Africa, you've seen Africa.

But like South America, when you're on the beans and rice, and you're like, how many old cities do I need to see? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, well, I was in South America for a year, and Africa was three years. I was working there, so I got to see a bit of it. What's your favourite country, Paula? Oh, people always say that.

It depends on experience. Me and Mar, I met a really cool Irish guy and we had a great time, so he made that really cool. Oh God, I love Irish men overseas, I tell you what. And Zimbabwe was great before Mugabe. It was dirt cheap. It was like 25 cents for a packet of cigarettes

and a dollar for a bottle of vodka. Darys and booze. That was good for the Darys, isn't it? Wow, God, that sounds like an absolute backpacker's dream, doesn't it? Yeah, Darys and hot Irishmen. And unrestricted medications to knock yourself out for those long bus rides. Have a little me-o-my and my-and-ma. Yeah.

All right, thank you, Paula. So 90 countries from Paula. Let's see if we can beat that. Have you been to more? 0800 DALS at MSN number 9696. Somebody's done all 195 countries. Good effort from Paula there, though. We want to know if you've been to more countries than 90.

90 is the mark to beat. Yeah. We've read an article about someone who claims to have gone to every single country in the world. Yes, the wandering lesbians. Now, Paula, the wandering lesbians. Paula. Is that their Instagram handle? I'm not sure.

If they don't have a blog called the wandering lesbians, I'd be disappointed. Now, Paula, sexuality, we didn't cover. Don't know if she's a wandering lesbian or what. But she has been to 90. So we're trying to beat 90 because the number of recognised UN countries... 195. 195.

And I've just been going through the list of Wikipedia of countries' independencies, and some of them are like the Norfolk Island, which is part of Australia. Australia. And then we've got the Chathams. That's part of New Zealand. So you can't count those.

Those are not countries. Those are New Zealand islands. I've done 40. I've just worked it out. 40, that's pretty good, eh? Shapers. There's so many. There's so many in Africa alone.

Why am I even looking in Africa? I know. Africa would be the hard one, right? Because even if you did a safari, you went into South Africa. Yeah. You're probably not going to touch too many, are you? Too many countries. Have you been to Brunei?

No. Oh, that'd be nice, wouldn't it? I don't know. Where's Brunei? Didn't they have that airline and they didn't serve booze? I'm not sitting on a plane for 12 hours and not having a cheeky tip off. Madness. No.

I don't even know. I haven't got that many. Liz, good morning. Yes. Good morning. How many countries have you been to? Well, it's not me. It's my friends in Queenstown. Okay.

I've been to 121. Wow. Jeepers. Was this all done on an OE? Well, no. In and out, in and out, in and out, all over. Oh, wow. Okay.

It's just over time. Yeah. Yeah, wow. Probably over It's just over time. Yeah. Yeah, wow. So probably over 10 years or more. Good Lord. So I don't believe you could do 195 since 2018. That's bollocks. Sorry.

Say that, should I? Well, no, they could, but to me, like, go to a country, you've got to explore it. You can't just be there for a day and take it off, you know? Yeah, yeah. They don't experience it in the country, are they, visiting? They just pass it off. Yeah, they're not experienced in the country, are they? No. They're just passing through. My friends have a world atlas on the wall. Yep.

And there's a green pin in every country they've been to. And there's a red pin in every country that they want to go to. And there's a yellow pin. I don't know what that means. Do they own this house? Because they're not getting their bond back. There's a lot of holes in this wall. If this is a rental.

It's a lot of holes. Oh, they seriously own the house. Okay, okay, good, good. Okay, fantastic. Liz, thank you. 121. Any beating that on the text machine?

No, but Liz bollocks them anyway. No, Liz has a great point. They didn't... Somebody said they read that Christopher Luxon, leader of the National Party, claims to have worked

in 193 countries. As what? Oh, what? Sending an email to bloody... China. When he was in... When he was working for Air New Zealand,

he would have travelled a lot. Yeah, but not to... Air New Zealand doesn't travel to 193 countries. Now, I'm not saying he did claim that, but a listener is claiming he claimed that.

No, that sounds wrong. It's a claim on a claim. It's a claim on a claim. It's a claim on a claim and I don't want to be the third claim. Did he a claim on a claim. It's a claim on a claim and I don't want to be the third claim. Did he do business in Iraqi Kurdistan and Andorra and Anguia? No.

And Ashmore? I don't know. And Bolivia? Yes. There's a guy on Instagram who's spent the last, I think, six years travelling to every single country in the world without getting on a plane. Wow.

Or returning to his home country. He's in the Pacific Islands at the moment and he's only got a few left. Wow. Where's he going to end? I don't know. Do you end it? But then, is Antarctica a country?

No, I looked it up. That's a continent. It is a continent that contains no countries. However, there are seven countries with what was the word it was like guardianship rather some aspect right

if you wanted to say that you've stepped on every continent in the world you'd have to go to Antarctica you'd have to get a but the thing is you'd have to do a cruise speaking of which

my dad and his wife who live in the UK are retired and permanently are literally on a perma cruise around the globe. Wow.

They're doing a year-long cruise at the moment starting this month. Started this month. Ending up in New Zealand to see me. They'll fly home and then

in 2025 they're going to Antarctica so they can say they've stepped on every continent. Wow, that's pretty cool. Yeah. Probably get norovirus at least four times.

Oh my God, so many diarrheas. On a perma-cruise? So many diarrheas. Oh a boomer cruise? So many diarrheas. Oh, another one in the bag. And it's a Versace bag as well. If you enjoyed that, give us a rating and a review

and be sure to tell your mates. You don't sound sincere there, Vaughn. I'm just reading what's written here. ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley.