ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 1st July 2022

Episode Date: June 30, 2022

Hackers  Sleep  Top 6: Whistling Scrotum  Silly Little Poll!  When should you have read the instructions?  Grace Palmer!  Hayleys Airport Experience  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Hello, welcome to the Fleeche, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe Graber Rich Smooth Barista Made Coffee. It's holidays time. This will be the last podcast for two weeks. Yeah. And then we'll be back after a two-week hiatus break. It's a mid-season break.

Peace out, mother effers. You know? Yeah. I wasn't even brave enough to say. You can say. It's the podcast entry. It break. A mid-season break. Peace out, mother effers. You know? Yeah. I wasn't even brave enough to say. You can say. It's the podcast entry. It makes me nervous. It's aggressive.

It's too aggressive. Well, it was very out of nowhere aggressive. I don't know where it came from. It was. Rage in me. We're about to go to the airport, aren't we? We are going to the airport together. We're on the same flight to Melbourne.

I know. We're going to hit the Longe for, I reckon, an early morning bubs. I'm excited to see. This is my first overseas trip for like nearly two and a half years. I'm excited to see the airport. Because you said it was a bit dead last time. Yes, but I went to Melbourne a couple of weeks ago and I was, like, everyone's still an arsehole.

Oh. You know, just travelling brings out the absolute inner arsehole in everyone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That still exists. Like yesterday when no one would put the bags through the fragile oversize. Oh, yeah, because we had broadcast gear, so we had to go through the thing. That brought out our inner arsehole. The dude at Wellington, he said, Air New Zealand doesn't let me touch their toys.

And then Air New Zealand, it was a whole lot. And then there was patience. And then Hayley was about to cry. To be fair, I was hungover and on my feet. And those things don't go hand in hand. So what do you mean you were standing? I was standing, waiting. Too much waiting. Everyone still sucks.

I wonder if I'll set off the beeper. You'll hear about that today. Yes, Hayley was touched rigorously at Wellington Airport. Touched by an angel. Today though, yeah, who knows what will happen. We'll see Hey fingers crossed For a little grope At the airport

Yeah I wish you well On your quest Absolutely get me going On my holiday moat I forgot to pack My squirty smellies Oh no

So what we need to do Is pretend to buy The one that I like Yeah And get a free I need to spritz myself For free Well and also

That's not going to last Two weeks though Nah it won't But I'll just Every day I'll go to Myers in Aussie Right and get a little test out We also want to smell nice

Because we've sort of strategically booked In our row of three The window and the aisle Hoping No one sits in the middle No one sits in the middle And we can spread I just had a look online

It's still open The middle seat is still open Come on Because it's giving me the chance To change my seat to that seat May the gods be ever in our favour. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show.

Fletch, Fawn and Hayley back in the studio this morning after our bangers bingo leg. Nice to be back. You got a ride to work today with Vaughan so you were as late as Vaughan. It's quite fun. Being late. Vaughn. It's quite fun. Being late.

It's living. It's living. It's living. I've got an extra 30 minutes sleep. Yeah, girl. Enjoy it. You earned it. But the thing is, Vaughn doesn't sleep in an extra 30 minutes.

He just faffs around so much at home. It's a bit of faffing. Like, do you have a half an hour shower? Something weird happened this morning. Oh, I woke up without an alarm. Oh no, that makes me feel sick. I woke up without an alarm. What do you mean, before you were on? Remember how I said, for the last couple of days

when we were on tour, I had an afternoon nap and I was like, I don't know what happened, but it didn't make a noise. And I suspect that it had something to do with connecting to Bluetooth. Oh, yep. Yes, speakers or whatever. Now the headphones were off, they weren't anywhere near. And last night I tested it and it was fine

but then this morning I woke up and it was two minutes after my alarm usually goes off and I hadn't made a sound. Oh no, that's terrible. But oh, let's all turn our alarms off.

Oh, let's do it. Yay! Group alarm turn off. Have you already done yours? Because we do have a couple of weeks holiday next week. A couple of weeks holiday.

Starting Monday. Have you already turned yours off? Yeah, I turned it off this morning. See, that's, I'm still in rookie era because you know when we've had a long weekend or something and it's like a Friday or a Monday, I forget. My wife does this because she sets an alarm to get up just before the kids to start getting ready for stuff.

Where's my sleep schedule? It's an alarm. It's right at the top of the alarm. So you go, you go, swipe down top right hand corner. Alarm. Yeah, I mean, we can do this later. No, no, no. It's really important. Everybody knows this is a nice way of telling everyone we've got two weeks off. Alarm.

A real break. Change. Edit sleep schedule. Yeah, and then just turn it off. Just down a little bit, you go. Wake up alarm, off. Oh, my gosh. See you in hell, alarm.

Fantastic. Gorgeous. Looking forward to a little holiday. Coming up on the show, Grace Palmer joins us this morning. My second favourite Palmer. Who's your first favourite Palmer? Eve Palmer. Oh, okay.

I'm absolutely gutted we couldn't get Eve in this one. The other star of Good Grief, season two. Which I loved season one. I need to check this out. I remember you raving about it. It was so good. I was kind of guilted into watching it because I'm friends with Josh Thompson.

You don't want to catch up with a friend who's had a recent television project and they kind of bring it up and you're like, I haven't watched that. Yeah, but that's Josh Thompson all the time. He's always had a recent project, hasn't he? Josh Thompson is the king of recent projects. I don't know where he squeezed this in. He's a busy man. Well, the new season is out and we're going to chat to Grace Palmer after

seven this morning. The top six is coming up. A man's had a wee whoopsie. And now his scrotum whistles. He's got a whistly, he's got a whistly scrot. How does, we can delve into this soon, but I don't know how that happens. Is there an airway in there? There's a, no. The same way a ranch loader whistles if you leave it open in the wind. Yeah, there's a gap. Right, okay. There's a no, the same way a ranch loader whistles if you leave it open in the wind.

Yeah, there's a gap. Well, this could be the most unusual top six ever. The top six songs, I'd like to hear that scrotum whistle. If it can whistle. Great. Alright. It'd be so good if some attractive person

walked past and your balls go I'm sorry, my scrotum is a catcaller. Very inappropriate. And that's been cancelled. Next on the show, though, there's a new scam alert. Oh, God. I always fall for this. All right.

So, there's a new scam. The FIBI are warning about this. FIBI? The FBI. Female Body Inspectors. Female Body Inspectors. People are not still wearing those t-shirts, are they? Are they not cool anymore?

No. The ones that are called the man, the legend. The legend, yes. With the arrow down to your... To the crotch. Yeah, to the crotch. Yeah, yeah. But there's a new scam.

And scams are getting so sophisticated. Hearing a lot in the news about scams that clone numbers, like you think it's your bank ringing because it's the bank's number.

Oh my God. Or a call from an Australian number, and my parents are in Australia, so you know, they're in their 60s, so I've got a little bit of an assume the worst attitude.

I assume they're dead. You are, so who's dead? Yeah, yeah, and they'll call me, some hospital's calling me. There's been two snake bites to the throat, I'd imagine. Yeah. Straight to the throat. Straight to the throat. And I answered and it was like, hello, PayPal

customer. And it was like an automated voice. Oh, right. The debit you have approved will be taken, blah, blah, blah. If this is not the case, press. And I was just like, you've got to care. How many people would fall for that? If you just made a PayPal payment, boom, you'd be like, oh, okay. I've got to do something here.

That's not the amount I said. I fell twice for the same one, which was that you have a package at customs. I'm a shopper. It's only a few dollars, right? Yeah, yeah. I'm an online shopper. So you pay the $3 and you're like, oh, shopper it's only a few dollars right yeah yeah i'm an online shopper so i'm like so you pay the three dollars and you're like oh well it's a scam but like they do that to you people like you a thousand times a day that's a lot of money that's thousands of dollars

but this new scam um at first i was like um i don't see the problem with this um but then i reading further, I was like, okay, wow, this is pretty insane. So people are now stealing people's identities. That's nothing new. That's nothing new.

Then they are applying for remote working jobs on their behalf. So say, for example, I stole your personal information, Hayley Sproul. I'd then apply for a remote working job, say in a call center or wherever. I would then apply for a remote working job, say, in a call centre or wherever.

I would then use video deepfake technology using your photos to do an online interview as you. I'd say I'm a diligent worker. I'm very trustworthy. I love dealing with people. I'm great at computers, skills, and blah, blah, blah. You'd then get the job. These hackers would get the job pretending to be you and then they've got all the access to company databases.

Whoa. So say they get a job at a call centre. They've got all this information. That is so extreme. But you're the bad guy. But you're the bad guy. Hayley Sproul's the bad guy because you're stealing all this company information.

No, I didn't steal anything. It's a real life version of when Tom Cruise wears the mask in Mission Impossible. Yeah. And then he gets in under the guise of being somebody else and then pulls it off and he's still Tom bloody Cruise. Yeah, I know. But now he's got all the access. Yeah.

Isn't that amazing? Someone could knock on your door and be like, why have you stolen all this company information? For which you could go to jail. You know, espionage or stealing. I have a question regarding the accents. Like, you'd have to find... No, but deepfake audio as well. Yeah, audio and video.

I didn't know they were doing deepfake audio. I thought they were only doing deepfake video. Yeah, it's like the Obama, the deepfake Obama. Oh my God. Someone does an Obama impression. Yeah, they just need enough audio. That was my Obama impression.

You think about if you were online and you were posting like TikToks and Instagram reels and videos. We were on the radio. Yeah, and where you talk. Somebody could just get all of that audio and have enough. Wasn't there that thing that like Alexa is going to let you have a personalized voice as the voice of Alexa and they only need a minute of audio to be able to copy your voice. Yeah, isn't that crazy? So that's kind of where things are heading.

There's nothing sacred anymore. I can't even own my own face. I can't even own my own voice. Yeah. I'm somewhat flattered, though, that someone would want to own my face. Someone wanted to be me, honestly. I get it. I get it.

You know what I mean? I heard scammers only pick the hottest people, so compliments. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Thousands of New Zealanders have taken part in the largest sleep survey in New Zealand. Are we getting enough? What do you think? What do you think? I'm going to say no.

No. And it's having a huge impact. There's some stats out of this survey. 48% of Kiwis experience difficulty sleeping every night. Yeah. Half of us. I fall in that category. Just worrying, you know.

I remember when I said that awful thing to my mum when I was 15 and it upset her. But why don't you just move on? It's been said. Just think about it that day. It was so terrible. The other thing I said to my friend, three in five Kiwis have trouble sleeping through the night, staying asleep. I do that.

But if I slept through the night, I'd wet the bed about five times. So that would be an absolute nightmare. I always have to go for one times. You have a one time wee. I have a one, normally about two o'clock, one or two o'clock.

I'm a three. I'm a three to four. Three wee. Yeah. Gosh, that really does interrupt the flow. You've got one lung. Kidney. Oh, kidney.

Lung's not, don't have a lot. They don't play a huge part in your urine frequency. So you've got an excuse for doing that. Yeah, probably. Two to three times. Something like that. Oh, God, when we're flying on a plane today to Melbourne, are you going to be up every bloody five minutes to go?

Who's got the window? Am I aisle or window? I think you're aisle. I'm aisle. We'll be fine. Oh, good. Okay. Because I will be. Oh, good. Okay. Because I will be asleep the whole time.

Okay. After a couple of whiskeys. Well, if you wake up in my kind of asses, because I'll do that thing where I just go over you. Oh, you won't wake me? I won't wake you up. Do you know me? Only because I know you. I wouldn't do that to a stranger.

You'd wake up a stranger? I'd wake up a stranger. God. I might wake up. I've got too much leg to do that shit. Excuse me. I've got to climb over. Yeah, yeah. Okay. A bit of a clamber. I've got too much leg to do that shit. Excuse me, I've got to climb over.

Yeah, yeah. Okay. A bit of a clamber. So a poor night's sleep, which a lot of us are having, is resulting in 66% of Kiwis feeling weary. Yeah. I'm a bit weary today. Interesting choice of words.

64% of us experience a lack of motivation due to our lack of sleep. 50% having difficulty concentrating or remembering. We're just all floating around in a zombie-like state. It just sounds like you've described him being an adult, really. Yeah, we do this to ourselves, though. We're on our phones too long, too close to bed. We stay up too late watching TV. We eat rubbish. So 42% of the most common factors contributing to our rubbish sleep,

42% using devices in the bed. Yeah. I mean, you know, phones. Surely that's more. It's got to be more than that. If you want to use devices in the bed, that's up to you. Well, just one. So I think they mean, you mean without screens.

Yes. Devices without screens. Screenless. I think those things will actually help you get to sleep. Absolutely help. Yeah. And actually most of them have a screen now, don't they? Yeah.

God, they're all high tech. None of this, oh, got to go get the batteries from the remote. No, but sometimes you've got to go old school. These new ones, these new fang dangled ones. Well, you plug it into the wall. What's that? You plug it into the wall. He uses an extension cord.

I wind it up. Like a watch, like a crank. Yeah, yeah, yeah, wind it up. It's got a spring in it and the spring slowly unwinds. That's just old school. That's not going to be this bloody wonderful screen. Got a virus last week, yeah, yeah. Winding up. It's got a spring in it, and the spring slowly unwinds. That's just old school. That's not going to be this bloody one with the screwing. Got a virus last week. Oh, God.

Went absolutely rogue. Went a UTI. Yeah. Jesus. Shit, we just went. Stress is ruining our sleep, 57%. Uncomfortable mattress, 53%. Yeah.

Not good. Being the wrong temperature. Too hot. Oh, a third of respondents had their mattress for over 10 years. Isn't it? That's about the lifespan, isn't it? Yeah, you're breaking it in there, aren't you? Oh, God.

Half a billion nights are lost to poor sleep every year. Half a billion nights. What does that mean? That's too much. Anyway, go to sleep. Everyone just needs to chill out. Put your screen devices down. Easier said than done, though, isn't it?

Yeah, I know. Listen to some Tibetan bowls. That's what I do when I can't sleep. What are Tibetan bowls? What are they sounding like? Oh, God, that was very... Can you bring some up on your feed? Yeah.

I see here some Tibetan bowls. I mean, not that that was a poor... When you hear it, you're going to be like, it was just as good. Oh, my goodness. Dude, this is me every night. So do you have this on when you go to sleep and then does it stop?

Or does it just go all the time? Yeah, I follow one that's like two hours or something of Tibetan bowls. The only thing is, every now and then, you'll be listening. Yeah. It's all going good. And you'll be drifting off, and then some dude will come in with a boing, boing, boing.

A big gonger. Mate, read the room. You didn't need your big donger in here now. Your big gonger waking me up. Leave me alone. That's very relaxing. He's holding this one. He's rolling it around.

That's why that sounds a little bit different. Are you watching a video? Yeah. That defeats the purpose. Oh, God, how good is that? Welcome to Tibetan bowls, everyone. Oh, that's the new way to fall asleep. That's the new way to fall asleep.

I mean, probably not ideal if you're just waking up and on your way to work, getting ready for work. God, imagine tuning in and hearing Tibetan bowls on ZM. I'd rather hear pudding bowls. Oh, yeah. And it's just sloppy jelly, like a sloppy... God, that's nice, isn't it?

Well, now I think I'll put Tibetan bowls up there with my favourite bowls, pudding bowls. Pudding bowls. Lawn bowls. And Tibetan bowls, yeah. And the skew bowls. And you're a good... Too bold. From the Panoramic ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six.

Hi there. What up? What's up? What's up? I reckon we need to bring that back. Do you know I watched Scary Movie the other day? Did you? Why did you watch Scary Movie the other day? It was on in a hotel.

It was like a month ago when I was away at a hotel and it was on, like Sky Movies or whatever. And I was like, I wonder how... Did you watch the first one? Yeah, it was the very first one. I was like, I wonder how this has aged. Terribly. But do you know what?

It's still actually quite funny Oh yeah, absolutely makes me laugh Take my strong hand It's Scary Movie 2 That's the best I like 2 better than 1 Is 2 dewy? Smell my fingers?

No, that's 1 That's 1 He puts it on his thumb Oh, it's a doofy or whatever Doofy But so many references to like old movies Yeah And just I thought at that age Not There were certainly some moments Oh, for the doofy or whatever. Doofy. But so many references to like old movies. Yeah.

And just, I thought at that age, not, there were certainly some moments I was like, you couldn't do that now. The bush? Yeah. No, that's two as well. Two's where it's at. No, the bush was. When they go and stay in the house. One was the explosion on the ceiling.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, the bush with the weed. Two was the bush with the weed whacker and the chainsaw and stuff. And David Cross is in it, right? David Cross is the guy in the wheelchair. Yeah. God, yeah, yeah. Oh, the bush with the weed. Two is the bush with the weed whacker and the chainsaw and stuff. And David Cross is in it, right? David Cross is the guy in the wheelchair. Yeah. God, yeah, that was wildly inappropriate. Yeah. Oh, I'm going to watch.

Maybe I'll download this for the player. Weather! Weather! Ah, okay. So a 72-year-old man from Ohio, today's top six, nothing to do with weather. He sought medical advice after experiencing a swollen face, shortness of breath, and his prime concern was a whistling scrotum.

How does this happen? Air accumulates in the scrotum, often caused by trauma. So then the air passes from one side of the scrotum to the other. And as it passes through the middle, it creates a whistling sound. So by trauma,

do you mean like you get a kick in the balls or you fall on something? Yeah, some sort of fall, they believe. He doesn't know. He doesn't remember. So he... And I don't know why we don't have the girls bike

with the bar down lower either No it's further to fall It's further to fall No but your feet stop here by then Not if you fall forward I'm all for the top bar The step through on a girls bike is 100% It's archaic

And the fact that women used to ride in skirts And they couldn't get the leg up and over Without exposing themselves Sometimes I want to ride with a skirt. Oh, God. You have a kilt. Yeah, I can't with him. Can you walk around in your kilt?

You've seen me on my bike in a kilt. It's good luck. Yeah. So he had some tubes inserted to get rid of air and pressure from this surgery. And then it got worse and I don't know, maybe his scrotum was prone to air accumulating there, and then it would start, it was whistling through the tubes. Oh, for God's sake. So did they put that whistle, the little whistle?

Yeah, from the party blower. He should put one of those party blower things on it, so the foil. Oh my God, so good.y blower things on it. So the foil. Yes. Oh my God, so good. With a little whistle on it. Well, if he's got a whistling scrotum, I've got the top six songs I want to hear that scrotum whistle. Of course you do.

Number six, it's an absolute classic. Okay. And it starts with the whistle, of course, Wind of Change. The 80s legendary song, Wind of Change. Do you have these songs or are you just going to whistle them for us? I can get Wind of Change. The 80s legendary song, Wind of Change. Do you have these songs or are you just going to whistle them for us?

I can get Wind of Change. I'm ready to go. That's an absolute 80s classic. That's an absolute 80s classic. Oh, yeah. You would win Britain's Got Talent in the first round, right, with that. If you were with Strattum was Whistler. Hard to deny.

Gorgeous clarity coming from the balls there. Brilliant. You're going to get... My balls are harmonising with your balls. We had good ball harmony. So yeah,

I'd like to hear them whistle that song. Another song that I would like to hear the Scrotum Whistle when it comes in at number five on the list of the top six songs I want to hear this man Scrotum Whistle is song. Another song that I would like to hear the scrotum whistle on, it comes in at number five on the list of the top six songs I want to hear this man's scrotum whistle, is this one.

Happy balls. Don't worry, be happy. Yeah, well, that's true. Don't worry if your balls are whistling. Is this like a rare medical thing? Oh, yeah. I don't know. Have your balls ever whistled?

No. I mean, I don't think so. I don't think I've ever met a pair of whistling testes. I've never come across any whistling testes. Whistling scrotum. Because it's not the testes, it's the scrotum. Do you happen across many? I can't say I do.

No. I can't say I do. Number, what are we up to? Number four on the list of the top six songs I'd like to hear the scrotum whistle?

Oh, a classic. What is this? It's sort of in the middle. Is it in the middle of the whistle? Sitting on the dock. Oh,

is there a whistling bit in the middle, is there? I just like that. It's an easy one to whistle. No, no, there's the little middle bit. Oh. Oh, was that it?

No, that was Hayley. Oh. At the end. Yes. Oh, great. This is very happy, relaxed testes, this one. Oh, mix this up with your Tibetan bowls and go to... What a relaxing time.

Have a lovely little sleep. Number three on the list of the top six songs I want to hear is Scrotum Whistle. It's a Christmas classic. Because, of course, it'll get to Christmas and you'll need to be... Festive. Festive. Festive. White Christmas by Bing Crosby. It'll be beautiful around the Christmas tree.

Yeah. Grandad, would you whistle us a tune with your scrotum? He's like, well, I've got to take my pants off because I can't whistle through my undies. Oh, yeah, I don't know. Well, close our eyes, granddad. Whistle us a tune. Number two on the list is... Okay, so I had the name of the song before

and I didn't write it down, but it's in my head. What's the one that's... Oh, my God, you're every... Fur Elise. No, is it Fur Elise? Edelweiss. Edelweiss. Oh, my God, you're every... Fur Elise. No, is it Fur Elise? Edelweiss. Edelweiss. Oh, that sounds terrible.

I'm not going to lie. Okay, good. Next one. That was great. Duality there. He's hating the whistle. You're setting dogs off. I'm getting messages on you setting people's dogs off.

And number one on the list of the top six songs I want to hear that scrotum whistle. Always look on the bright side of life. Because you've got to, if you've got a whistly scrotum you've got to have a good attitude. It'll get you through. You do. Where's the whistle in this one? Is it towards the end as well, eh?

Yeah. And what insurance company used this? State. State Tower. AA. Are you just naming interviews? Now you're just naming everything. Southern Cross. Southern Cross.

I can't believe you left off Florida Whistle. Flo Rida Whistle. That's going to be my Friday lunch bag. You can't expect you left off Florida Whistle, Flowrider Whistle. That's going to be my Friday flashback. You can't expect Grandad to whistle that with the scrotum. It's a modern classic. It is a modern classic, but he's 72. He's 72. That is today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Silly little poe. Silly little poe. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Today's silly little pole. How many towels do you own per person in your household? Options. One, two, three, four or more.

Well, I own six. I'm a one-person household. Are we including? Because we've got towels we use. Oh, and then secondary towels. Yeah. Yeah. And then a couple of beach towels.

I wasn't counting beach towels. I know beach towels is its own category. And then I've got like towels that I use for like when I go swimming or to the gym. But they're just in a wardrobe. They're not counted in the general circulation of towels. No, no, no, no. We're talking about bathroom towels. Bath towels.

Yeah, we're talking about towels that you dry yourself with. I hope people weren't including bath mats, hand towels, flannels, beach towels, any towel area. Paper towels. Yeah. I think we're three if I include... Per person. Two kind of not as good ones. Four nice ones. There's two in the household. That's three. Yeah. That think we're three if I include... Per person. Two kind of not as good ones, four nice ones. There's two in the household.

That's three. Yeah. That's normal. Okay, well, how many towels do you own per person? One towel? 2% of respondents own one towel. Give me another towel. Per person.

Risk goes. Two towels, 15% of people who responded owned two towels. Three towels, 26% of people, three towels per person. Four or more, a whopping 57%. Wow, a lot of towels. Per person. Is it because you might go through towels a bit and then you want to wash your towels together, right?

No, I just wash them with my clothes. Are you a monster? I don't, with my clothes. Are you a monster? I don't. I'm kidding. Are you a monster? I'm kidding. I wouldn't dream of that. So you want to kind of save them up and then do them all at once, right?

Yeah. You do a towel wash. You do a towel wash. Maybe I save up a towel because if you're like one you use and then three days later you add another to the towel, you're going to have a manky towel. Yeah, it's manky towels. Do you have, this is a question for you, Vaughan. Yes.

Do you and Sade have separate towels? Have nicer towels than the children. As you should. Yes. They should be grateful they've got a roof above their heads.

Yeah. You know, and food in their bellies. Do you guys shear a towel? No. Sometimes we shear a towel. I don't like, I get a towel very wet

and then Sade will say, you've used my towel. And I'll be like, how do you know? And she's like, well, it's wet. Why are you getting a towel so wet? I get a towel wet. I mean, Aaron's got big, long, curly hair. But yeah, because my hair. I've got a lot of surface area.

Do you not do that thing where you squeegee your body? I do squeegee myself. You squeegee your body with your fingers? I do squeegee myself. No, I do a little like dog like. Yeah, shake it all off. A little shake. I'll squeegee legs front and back I do a little like dog like... Yeah, shake it all off. A little shake. I'll squeegee legs front and back.

Squeegee front and then back. Oh my God. Treat yourself with more respect. You're not a glass surface. Yeah, do the arms. And then there's less water on the towel. Give yourself a Mr. Muscle and a paper towel. Yeah.

Squeaky. Somebody said they speculate you have so many towels because you often have guests Between wash cycles Well like I've got a guest at the moment My friend's staying in the spare room I don't think that's quite the guest That they had in mind

Oh is it not I have a guest here You want to give them a wash up Before you kick them out you know You'll be hearing from my lawyer It's pretty nice isn't it You'll be hearing from my lawyer It's nice to

It's nice to leave somewhere nice and clean again Very generous lover After the filth. After the mess that's been made. Alright, here's some feedback on the towels. Hayley says

shower towels two each. Cabin towels which are two old shower towels two each. Cabin towel. What is a cabin towel?

I've never heard that term. A cabin... You're googling? What is a towel? Oh my god, cabin towel racks? Cabin towel hooks? What is a towel? Oh, my God. Cabin towel racks? Cabin towel hooks? What is a...

It just sounds like a normal... Is it a bigger than normal towel? Hayley has also included beach towels, though. She said two beach towels each. The dog has five towels. Yeah, we've got some dog towels. Oh, yuck. We've got some towels just for rough dog wiping.

Oh, no. Cabin towels look like sort of thin, lightweight, quick-dry kind of things. Okay, a couple of cabin towels there. Alicia says, I own heaps, but only use like two each on rotation. See, I would say it's a time for a clan of the hot water cupboard there, Alicia. You lose valuable real estate to towels that, you know, don't really serve a purpose. Yeah, who's got all this storage? Incredible.

Francesca says, three sets to rotate through and extra for guests and the dog. That's too many towels. So three sets there. She's rocking three towels per purse. Mel says, we own so many towels. Every time the mother-in-law comes to visit, she buys new towels to match the new duvet cover she bought with her to put on the guest bed.

Other than that. That's a pair of sag. I've just got a new duvet for your spare room. BYO duvet. It's a bold move. Yeah. To assume someone's decor. Yeah. And then to buy matching towels. Ashley says, one

for my hair, one for my body, and then two more for when they're on the wash. So that's four towels per person. Oh, yep. Okay. Ashley's rocking there. Linda, only two people in our home. We have four each. That way we don't have to wash them every day. Yeah. What about the people we're hearing from that use one towel a shower?

What do you mean wash them every day? Towels last more than a day. No, we've heard from people that literally wash their towel every time they have a shower. That's towel suicide. You're just going to be tearing that towel to pieces. But you're clean. You're clean. When you come out and you use the towel, that towel to pieces But you're clean You're clean When you come out

And you use the towel That's the cleanest You've ever been Yeah yeah You're just getting water off You've got to wash your clothes Every time you wear them But that's because

They've been on you for hours Courtney One to use And one for the wash That's basic maths Yeah Three kids One adult

We have twenty-ish towels Says Mel New one per use Never ever reuse a towel. We can use six or seven towels a day. You know you're making work for yourself, Mal. You've got three kids. You've got to think about the planet.

You've got three kids there, so you're already a drain on the planet. You've got a lot of water here. Yeah. Go a couple of days there. I can't believe a mum of three is like, yeah, one towel in the wash. That's hanging your towel back up. Maybe she loves doing washing.

Some people love doing washing. Well, with three kids, there'd be enough clothes washing to do anyway. Good idea. Sure, there's plenty. Screams psychopath to me. Washing every time. Yeah. Well, if your towels are dirty after you shower, you're not showering.

Well, yeah, wash yourself properly. Scrub harder. Yeah, scrub harder. Dry softer. Okay. So, I mean, you're not showering right? Well, yeah, wash yourself properly. Scrub harder. Yeah, scrub harder. Dry softer. Okay, so, I mean, we're a big towel nation. Big towel. We're huge towel nation. We've been doing all this late night talking.

Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. This is honestly the wildest thing I've read. So, there's a woman who owns a bridal shop where you buy gorgeous, expensive, customised, made-to-fit wedding dresses. Yep. She shared a story on the talk.

She answered the phone one day and there was a groom who was utterly distressed. And he said, he was in tears, he said, I won't do the voice he said I need to reorder my wife to be, my fiance's wedding dressed exactly the same as it had been personalised

all the different fittings, I need to do it and they'd have the schematics right the schematics the hell is schematics the designs and stuff specifics? schematics? Well, they're designs and stuff. Specifics? Yeah.

Schematics. Schematics. The design, the measurements. The design, they'd have all the measurements and everything. Schematics. Schematic. I mean, I suppose it kind of fits. It's symbolic and symbolified a schematic diagram, in particular an electric or electronic circuit.

Yeah, I think schematics is slightly more electronic. Does it just light up? The schematics. Some of them do. It might. So show off with your fancy wancy words. They've got all the details, but this was super, super close to the wedding. She was like, wait, wait, what happened to the dress? Why?

Why is that he buried his wife-to-be's nana in the wedding dress. So this groom calls me today, frantic as hell. Can you help me? My bride bought her dress with you last year. I get that, but I need to reorder it.

So as I'm talking to the groom, the groom just breaks down and starts crying. Well, it's an unfortunate situation. You see, the bride gave the dress to my mother to go ahead and store in safekeeping. Well, two weeks ago, my grandmother died. So grandpa was buried in his tuxedo. Grandma wanted to be buried in her wedding gown. Mom told me to go get grandma's wedding dress out of the closet. So we did. We didn't know it was to get the box. We took the bag. So the guys took this dress and they dropped it off at the funeral home.

I mean, shout out to Nana for fitting, you know, this. Yeah. Her granddaughter's wedding dress. Even fitting her own wedding dress. Yeah. Round of applause. Oh, yeah. Shout out.

But then I guess if you don't fit your wedding dress and your coffin, they just probably just don't tighten it up at the back. Yeah, yeah. You don't see it. Nah, yeah. I'd get a bit of lipo. Oh, same. Suck a bit out of me before I go.

Yeah, I want to look hot. Tighten it up. A couple of staples here and there. But anyway, so yeah, this groom was like, I'll just go get the wedding dress from the thing, went into the wardrobe and grabbed the current wedding dress. This isn't his fault. He's not at all.

Oh, my God. His mother didn't say That's grandma's wedding dress He just grabbed the box Yeah but surely He would have given it To the embalmers He wouldn't have even Looked at it

He would have grabbed it Yeah But Nana's wedding dress Would have been Old An older fashioned thing He wasn't to know How it was to be stored

This is why you Shouldn't keep secrets Oh but then Isn't there a thing Where the groom Shouldn't see the wedding dress? That's why she gave it to his mother, I reckon, to get it out of their house so he wouldn't stumble across it

so he wouldn't know what it looks like. Not his fault. Yeah. I mean, it's no one's fault really, but oh my God. And so then he didn't tell her. He went to this woman who shared on TikTok

and said like, please just get the dress again. She was like, it was too close. They couldn't do it? They couldn't do it. They couldn't do it because it was all customised and stuff. So then he had to tell his fiance,

this is what's happened. Your nana is buried in your dress in the earth. Well, you've got to exhume nana, don't you? It's the only thing to do. The only thing to do. What if it was open coffin though

and then she saw her dress and went, what the? And then, would you take it off her? Well, grandma's dress is still hanging in a cupboard somewhere, that means. She could get into grandma's dress. You're clearly a similar size. Would you

take it off Nan if you saw it in an open coffin? No. I don't know. What, and then Nan's getting buried naked? Well, you just put a tracksuit on her. Yeah, an Eddie Dess. Or a juicy couture. A nice juicy, I reckon.

Oh, my God. Or just get to rip down the funeral home's net curtains because they always look a little wedding dressy, don't they? Yeah, give her a bouquet of flowers. Yeah. Anyway, the bridal boutique ended up getting her a new dress, but it wasn't the one she wanted. And the bride was like,

I'm starting to see the funny side of this. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. What about two weeks ago I ran out of some free facial moisturiser I was sent and that's my favourite sort of beauty product. One that I don't have to think about because

this is me and the aisle at the supermarket or the chemist when I have to buy something. What? Which one? But don't you have one that you've used that you like? No. You landed on something. Do the same thing, right?

How often are you facially moisturizing? Every morn. Are you? Yeah, every morn. Well, every time I, like, and then shower at night, I'll chuck one on. But I ran out of my Q10 overnight cream. Wow. I didn't pay for that.

I think Sade had some leftover ones. She was like, you can use that if you want. Right. How often do you moisturise? I don't moisturise. Piss off. What? No, like maybe in summer if I get like,

if I go out in the sun or something, I have a little moisty. Oh my God, if I don't moisturise, I'll crack in half. My face feels like a dry gal. Yeah, okay I don't moisturise, I'll crack in half. My face feels like I'm a dry gal. Yeah, okay. You can moisturise. It's naturally, I'm just oily, I guess.

You're not oily. I'm not oily. I don't know. Yeah, I just never use it. So I, two weeks ago, ran out of this one I'd been using for a while, and for a couple of days I just put my beard oil on my face as well. That seemed to work all right. Yeah, okay.

I don't know. I don't know if there's anything on this. You're putting hair oil on your face. Yeah. That seemed to work all right. Yeah, okay. I don't know. I don't know if there's anything in this. You're putting hair oil on your face? Yeah, but like what's bed oil? Hair oil. Yeah, but what's your skin? If not the home of your hair? Yeah, okay.

All right. I don't know. I don't know if your skin should be doing that. So I ran out of this stuff and then I started using this other pottle of stuff that I found at home in the bottom drawer on Sade's side, which often has leftovers, dregs, remnants,

ones she tried but didn't like. Okay. And, of course, we were away for a couple of days with work. Yeah. And at the moment, my toiletries bag is just like a plastic. Oh, my God. You are such a mess. I need to get a toiletries bag.

I don't know what happened to my last toiletries bag. It was too small anyway, but it's like a plastic bag from the supermarket before they banned them, that sort of bag. Okay. So I can see what's in there and stuff. And when I got home yesterday and unpacked, I just took that out of the bag and plonked it on the sink in the bathroom. Yep.

And then last night, Sade's like, can you put this away? I was like, what's the point? We're going away again at the weekend. That makes sense. Like I can just leave that there and then just grab it when I need it and I know everything's in there because if I use my toothbrush, I put it back in there. Yep.

And she was like, just put it away. And then she started pulling stuff out of it to get me in an effort to put it away. And she's like, why did you take foot cream with you? And I was like, what is the foot cream? What's the foot cream? She's like, this one. I'm like, what is the foot cream? What's the foot cream? She's like, this one. I'm like, that's my face cream. Oh, no.

You don't use foot cream on your... You mean girls yourself. What? You mean girls yourself. That's what they do in Mean Girls is they replace, what's her name, the popular one, they replace her day cream with foot cream. But this is like a moisturising foot cream for like,

I don't know, making your feet. The hard calloused feet. Making your feet feel nice. Yeah. That's my thoughts. If it can fix a foot, it can fix a face. If it can moisturise a foot, it must be capable of moisturising a face.

Okay. Don't use foot cream. Don't use foot cream on your face. It was a foot moisturiser. When you picked this up, did you even read it? It was like a hand, you know a hand and body lotion? Yeah. The face is part of the body.

I'll use a hand and body lotion on my face. No, it's not. The face is more sensitive. It's part of the body though. I don't want my face getting used to being treated too well. I want it. You need separate moisturisers for the hands, the body, the face and the feet. That's what I'm saying.

That's where I believe the conspiracy lies. I believe this is all the same. You're what I'm saying. That's where I believe the conspiracy lies. I believe this is all the same. You're paying more for a smaller pot that says face on it when you could be paying a lot less economically to rub your foot cream on your face. That's my risk, but I didn't read the instructions and that's when Shadow was like, you've got to read where these things go.

I said, I don't have to read. I refuse to learn. You could have been using like an exercise rub. You know, like a tiger balm. If it was burning, I'd know. An anti-flam. Imagine if it was all like a hydrocortisone product and your skin's just getting thinner and thinner

and thinner. Now, according to Cosmopolitan, 11 things you should never put on your face. Foot creams. Why? They are too rich, thick and sticky to be applied to your facial skin. They're formulated to break down thick calluses on your feet and often contain chemical exfoliants at percentages you should never use

on your face. Nah, this one didn't have any chemical exfoliants in it. Oh, it said all natural and stuff. That's why I was like, I'm on board. But it turns out I didn't read it because it was for the foot. Wow. So, I want to know from you listening this morning, and not only beauty products,

but all up when you didn't read the instructions, because we had a little bit of an issue recently with Sade's dad's new place with the washing machine. Oh, okay. Washing machines come with transport bolts in them. Oh, you've got to take them out. Yeah, you do. And we didn't,

and it danced all over the floor and took a big carving out of the wall Oh no It was like Bring those washing machines Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom On the wall Yeah

So yeah, take the transport bolts out Didn't read the instructions Gotta read the instructions Sometimes when you get something new Or you've got a product You're just so excited to use it You're like How hard can it be?

Yeah, I never read the instructions. You jump in. You only read the instructions. When something goes wrong. Exactly. You're like, I'll figure it out. How hard can it be? You know another one that people don't read the instructions on?

Hair removal cream. You veet. Oh, you've got that. I learned the hard way. Oh my God, when they're like, leave for seven minutes. You're like, seven? I'll make it ten. More like seven.

I'm a hairy boy. More like 15. And then you've burnt your nipple off. Yeah, all off. 0800-DARLS-IT-N. We want to hear from you now. You can text as well, 9696. When did you not read the instructions, but you probably shouldn't?

When did you not read the instructions? When did you not read the back of the container? When did you not follow assembly instructions? Oh, yeah. Foot cream on your face. Yeah. Someone actually said on, replied to our Instagram story, they asked me if I'd had Botox.

So that shows me that the feet cream must have been working. Because it made your face shiny. Shiny? Tight. No wrinkles. But you don't look like you've had Botox. Nah, I don't know. That's also not an insult. Maybe they were being sarcastic.

Yeah, right. It looked so wrinkly. Maybe they were more suggesting I should get Botox. I'm thinking about it a little bit. Really? Just a little bit, yeah.

Really? Only since I like went to have another procedure done. Yeah. And they said, you know we do a little bit of Botox for that thing there. They shouldn't say that. They said that. They shouldn't say that.

For what thing where? What thing? Something that had you even considered that was a problem? I mean, I know that I've got a frown line in between my eyebrows. Because I'm always second guessing everyone. I was going, what? Yeah. What did you say?

But no, it's just been in the back of my mind.? But you imagine if they took away your ability to do that. You'd be like, what? Also because I talk like this. Imagine if I didn't. Suddenly I'd be like, what did you say? What did you say? And everyone would be like, I can't read her anymore. Yeah.

Okay. Some messages in. Someone said, I was 10 years old. I used blister cream to brush my teeth because it came in the same tube. Didn't read. What's blister cream? Is it like a Like a soothing

kind of a thing. Oh okay. It might be slightly minty because you know mint's a good soothing agent. Oh yeah.

It could have been a minty or it could have just been that real like pasty grossness. Yeah. I didn't realise

you weren't supposed to use hair removal cream down there and I ended up getting chemical burns on my testicles. No, the skin's too soft and sensitive. Yeah.

I don't know if you get this targeted advertising, Hayley, but guys get this targeted advertising where there's a shaver and they put it on a kiwi fruit and it doesn't go through the kiwi fruit. Oh, it's the kiwi fruit, the testicle. So you shave your bits with the shaver. Yeah. Don't they put it on a balloon at some stage as well? Oh, maybe, yeah.

To show you that you won't get a nick down there? Because that's a real danger. I didn't realise that the testes was a huge part of the shaving process. Well, they get hairy. It just looks weird if you don't. Yeah, there is some, yeah, not as packed as thick. Not as much as the pubis. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, certainly not.

But, you know, it looks weird if you've done everything else and then there's a couple of coconuts hanging down, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, right. You know, you might as well give that a little tidy up while you're there. But there is an art to it. It's like shaving a chicken. Really, isn't it? It's like shaving a roast chicken.

I think you pluck a chicken. Yeah, right. Or more like shaving a pig, maybe. Yeah, because I don't have one of those shavers, so mine's like a game of operation. I think you're about to say you don't have a scrotum. No, I've got one of those. Ask what happened.

Congratulations. Got one of those. You don't have one of those shavers. No. That was invented by a Kiwi. What was that? A young Kiwi invented that shaver that... I saw a thing on him once.

I don't believe the advertising. I mean, I'd bet you can smash it into a Kiwi fruit and it won't nick. Yeah. Well, a Kiwi fruit doesn't bleed, so you wouldn't know, would you? No, but it would certainly put green juice everywhere. Yeah. Yeah, that's a good point.

That would be more terrifying to be tidying up down there and hit a green juice vein. Somebody said, I didn't realise that I was making a, I thought I was making a cup of soup. I didn't read the pack. I was making a whole cup of delicious gravy stock. Drink it down. Yum, though. Yeah, that's good for you. Drink it down.

Yeah, get that down. And then another report of hair removal cream. It got into my mucous membranes, and I had to sleep with an icy flannel between my legs. My husband had been away in the Navy for four months, so I was having to tidy up before he got home, and he came home to a blistered mess. It went in, it went in ya. Yeah. Oh my god. That's not supposed to.

It's a very delicate pH balance. Yeah. Someone said we're a deep heat household. Oh yeah. Gotta love a bit of deep heat. Yeah. Make you feel good. Reminds me of my rugby playing days. The liniment. The changing rooms. Wow really? I was a journey player at primary. No I. The liniment. The changing rooms. Wow, really? I was a journey player at primary.

No, I played at high school. Oh, did you play at high school too? Yeah, in primary. I was like, what kind of primary kid's deep heating themselves? That's why I was wondering too. When you're in primary school, deep heat hurts. Yeah. Scary.

Anyway, one day there was no deep heat, so we bought an off-branded deep heat and mum thought it was toothpaste. Oh, gosh. No, no, no. And she was mostly angry at dad because he bought off-brand of deep heat and mum thought it was toothpaste. Oh, God. No, no, no. And she was mostly angry at dad because he bought off-brand deep heat. Jeepers. And then dad was yelling, there was no deep heat.

It was a whole situation. I didn't know there was an off-brand deep heat. Oh, my God. I've just seen another text come through about me getting Botox for my brown line. Offering it. Do I need it? Let me look at it. She says, do I need it? As her forehead's all like, I'm kidding.

Wrinkled. No, I don't think you do. I do a little bit. That's from Dr. Lauren. She said Botox will clean up a frowny friend better than foot cream. We'll see, Dr. Lauren. Oh, God. We'll bloody see.

Sounds like Dr. Lauren needs a couple of patients. Yeah. I didn't realise it was such a talking point, this frown line. No, it's not. I think it's because you mentioned it and Dr. Lauren jumped at the opportunity to do... Is it that bad? No, it's not bad. I'm going to put this, Carween, I'm going to send

you this and people can tell me if it's that bad. I don't think you need the nation weighing in on whether you should get both of them. You don't ask people. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley Play ZM Grace Palmer In studio now

After she popped in Now she's popped into the studio She's popped in It's been a two stage pop in And popped in You didn't really give me much warning The song just stopped And then you just started talking

And we were live It's live radio Yeah You're quite rattled I am a bit rattled You guys are so casual. Hi. These songs are like bloody one minute, ten seconds long these days.

There's ads that are longer than the song. It's madness. Don't you voice most of the ads? Oh, no, no, no. No one can afford this. Not everybody, not every bloody Tom, Dick and client can afford this voice. Now, season two is out now. Yeah, yeah.

It's out now on TVNZ+. It came out yesterday. Good Grief. Good Grief. Good Grief. It was good to use that as the name. And also, oh, Good Grief. It's out already.

Now, for those that haven't seen season one, give us the synopsis. It's basically about two very different sisters who inherit a funeral funeral home and the very motley crew that goes with it and how they deal with owning that business and all the crazy escapades that come with being a funeral director.

Played by actual sisters? Yeah, played by me and my sister Eve. Have you guys worked together much before? No, just in life. Did you guys worked together much before? No. Just in life. Did you guys know each other very well? No, no. This is the first time. But it feels like it's been quite an intense period because obviously we ride it together

so we spend a lot of time together over this. How's that? Do you guys get on well? This is really boring and I tell everyone we get along so well. You're like siblings that like each other. Of us? Of us?

No, that you can work together because you put my siblings and me in a room, like literally in five minutes someone's going to be thrown. Someone's crying? Someone's crying. Someone has said something really inappropriate. I reckon, are you guys quite close in age? Yes. Yeah, so me and all my siblings are quite spread out.

Right. Mum was, it was a long time having children. No, so we get along because we don't really have a lot to fight about. Eve and I are five and a half, six years apart. Are you? Thank you, yes. She is a lot older than me. And people forget that.

They're like, who's older? And I'm like, Eve, by half a decade. By a significant amount. Wow. Yeah. I don't think it's a bad thing against you. It's a good thing for her. Yeah, thank you.

Yeah. But by proxy, that's a bad thing for you. Mm-hmm. Sorry. I mean, look, maybe we could both go get Botox. Yeah, we were just talking about Botox. Thanks a lot. No, I got the woman reference.

I don't need it. Yeah, Grace looked at me. She's like, do I need Botox? Do I need Botox? And a lot. No, I got the woman reference. I don't need it. Yeah, Grace looked at me and she's like, do I need Botox? Do I need Botox? And the answer is no. Never. How'd you get Vinny back

for season two? We asked him. But this guy's played a young Vin Diesel in the Fast and the Furious franchise. You're lucky to have his time. I know. We are so lucky to have his time.

To be honest, our entire cast is very awesome. Amazing cast. Really, really good cast and they're very busy people but I think they enjoy, like I have learnt that and you guys probably know this, doing comedies is so fun. I can see why Will Ferrell and they only do comedies. It's like you just laugh all day and it's such a great work experience.

You don't like, not like going to work. It's also, I mean, maybe this isn't true, but like less funded. We make less comedy. We love a drama. We love a murder drama. Yeah, we do. We love a broken wood. And so for actors, when they have the chance to get on set,

have a laugh and make a comedy, they like chomp at it. Yeah, yeah. So I think they just were pumped to come back and be a part of it. But we still every day felt so grateful to have Josh and Sophie and Vinnie there. Also, Sophie was like deeply pregnant. So on our publicity shoot, which was on our last day of shooting, she said, I think I might need to go. And we were like, are you?

She said, I think I might be in labour. I don't know. And so we just let her go I think I might be in labour. I don't know. And so we just let her go. She didn't go into labour. She's heavily pregnant. Like nine months pregnant, basically. Yeah, she's a champ.

An absolute champ. Amazing. And we were also seeing Josh Thompson, most employed man in the history of New Zealand. How he finds time to do an awesome,

fun project is bewildering. Yeah, well, if you haven't seen season one, you can catch up TVNZ. It's TVNZ Plus now, isn't it? It's TVNZ Plus. It's fancy.

But it is free. Don't forget. I think people think that it's not free. It's free, but it'll cost you. How? That's the tagline. Come on, I'm a company man here. Is that the tagline?

It's free, but it'll cost you. Hey! Why will that cost me? Because you'll be so distracted by the content. Have you not seen the ad where she jumps in the giveaway car? Oh, yes. That's a great ad but I didn't hear that line. Oh, but it'll cost my time.

It's free but it'll cost you because you're so engaged in the content. There's so much content. You're like, I'm a TVNZ girl. I'm a TVNZ woman. You are not. I'm back to the enjoy them for that one. It doesn't make any sense.

It's free but it'll cost you. It'll free but it'll cost you. Do you want my credit card details or not? No, they don't want them. Check it out. Good grief. They just want you to watch a few ads. Yeah.

Good grief. I'm happy to watch some ads. Well, that's what they're asking of you. It's free. It's free. It's free. It's free. Okay.

Season one and two now out on TVNZ+. And for international listeners to the podcast as well, it's going to be overseas, UK, US. And Canada, yes, on Sundance Now and IFC.

I don't know what those words are. Or mean. That's exciting though, I love it. We all love when a Kiwi show gets picked up overseas. We're mighty proud.

Mighty proud. I mean, Dream is the, you sell it and they want to do a local version, right? Because you're like, this is going to cost you. Yeah.

That's going to cost you. That's going to cost you. That'll cost you. It's free, though. It's free, but it'll cost you. It's a Friday tradition, arguing over our favourite categories, our favourite things. Before I even say today's category, steak. We are ranking barbecue meats today.

Oh, yum, yum, yum. Now, are we going to include things like your sort of slow, long-cooked, smoked things? I was just thinking slapping on... Yeah, slapping on a was just thinking slap it on. Yeah, slap it on a Weber. Look, it's such a... I mean, I've got the time, but I know Fletch doesn't want to sit here for the next 25 minutes

breaking down exactly the best way to slow cook everything. But also I think the average Joe blogs when it's like, hey, we're going to have a barbecue at mine, you just bring around... Saucies. Okay, so we're talking basic bitch barbecue. Chops, maybe. The BB, BBQ.

We're not starting at like 6am like Wanda's. We are waking up at the crack of dawn, baby. We're getting that room temperature brisket on there. A thermometer connected to an app. No, no, no. We are simply going to the supermarket at 4.30 on our way to your house and buying some chicken nibs. Can we go to the butcher? Can we go to the butcher?

Let's not go to the supermarket. Let's go to the butcher. Oh, I love the butcher. Let's go to the butcher. I don't even know where there is a butcher. Let's go to the butcher? Can we go to the butcher? Let's not go to the supermarket. Let's go to the butcher. Oh, I love the butcher. Let's go to the butcher. I don't even know where there is a butcher. Let's go to the butcher. We're going to the butcher. We're going to the butcher.

I go to the supermarket, I get chicken nibbles. Nibbles? Some saucies. And I'm happy. I'll do some hamburger patties. And done. I'm done.

That's me for a barbecue. Is he trash? He is trash. Is he trash? No, I'm the everyman. That's not the everyman. I bring... If you're having barbecue...

Burger patties, we're having burgers. No, sometimes at a barbecue you do just slap a patty on. It's like the equivalent of putting mince on the barbecue and you know this boy loves mince. Why do you have to put

mince on the barbecue? Why do you have to put mince on the barbecue? Oh my God. The mince has got to be something before it goes on the barbecue. I'm going away for two weeks and there's so much mince in the barbecue. And you know this boy loves mints. What? You have no mints on the barbecue? What have you got mints on the barbecue for? Oh, my God. The mints has got to be something before it goes on the barbecue. I'm going away for two weeks and there's so much mints in the fridge. Oh, my God. Where do you get your mints in the fridge?

I put them on the barbecue. Okay, so my number one is steak. Mine's chicken nibbles. You can't go past steak. Oh, my God. Monster. Let's go. Chicken wings are the best.

Barbecue chicken wings. I would put chicken. Skewer. Oh, no, no. Oh, my God. I forgot about skewers. Chicken wings are the best. Barbecue chicken wings. I would put chicken. Skewer? Oh, no, no. Oh, my God. I forgot about skewers. Chicken skewer. No, no, no.

It's top three for me. What about a prawn skewer? Yeah, but you're getting a bit fancy now. Because I don't do hot plate. I'll only do grill. And then on the chicken skewer, the skewer always catches on fire. You're going to win it. Just for some vegan and some vegetarian content, those crayon sausages.

Yum. Do you know what's better than a crayon sausage on a barbecue? An asparagus spear. Yum. What do you mean asparagus spear? Oh, what about asparagus spear? You roll it in like, oh, I think corn's the absolute shit. Corn might get an honorable mention in the top three, actually.

Leave it in its husk husk. Yep. Maybe open it up at the top and just push butter and garlic and stuff in there and then squeeze it and give it the old massage up and down the corn. Really work it up and down, up and down. Work it. Two hands, two hands. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Grab the bottom of it. Yeah, grab it on the bottom and work your way up and down. Okay. And then so the butter and the garlic are all around it and then cook it in there. Mmm, baby. Carl, when were you just recording those physical motions Vaughan was just doing? I sure was. Right. Just in case anyone those physical motions Vaughan was just doing? I sure was. Just in case anyone wants

to get prepared for summer. When the corn season's back. You won't get a good corn on a cobblestone. I love it. So you're a steak? Okay, top three. Just for variety, I'm going to go

steak, sausage. You've got to have a sausage. sausage. Got to have a sausage. You've got to have a sausage. It's a barbecue. I like chicken, though, but I was like, you've got to have a sausage. It's a barbecue, goddammit. We're going to have a pork and pork sausage. It could be a flash sausage, but it's got to be a butcher's sausage.

Don't give me a pre-cooked sausage or I'll slap your face with it. No, but sometimes they're nice. Edda Bunnings. Yeah. Edda Bunnings. You've got to tell me you're not topping for a little sawdust sausage? We're the every people. We're the everyday people.

I'm a chicken skewer. Yes. A sausage. Tied steak and corn. Now we're talking about corn. If we're going to put ties in there, I'd put chicken tied with corn. What about a chop? Love a chop.

Love a chop. Love a dry, overcooked chop. No, no, no. It's a dry yuck. No. Okay, so I would go wings. Bar a chop on the barbecue. Yeah, it's a dry, overcooked chop. No, no, no. It's a dry yuck. No. Okay, so I would go wings. Barbecue wings. Psycho.

I'd go... You want a pre-cooked sausage? Pre-cooked sausage. Yeah. And then I'd go a skewer. A prawn or a chicken skewer. Where's your steak? I don't do steak.

Where's your red meat? I don't eat steak. Oh, my God. Save the planet, man. How often would you eat a steak, Vaughan? Because I said to Pax... Twice a week! Pax Asadi, I said, I eat a steak a week.

I eat at least a steak a week. And then... How good was that beef Wellington that we had in Wellington? Oh, my God. And that was a steak wrapped in pastry. You ate way too much red meat. It's not good for your health. Is it?

Because when I had my colonoscopy, he said that thing was spick and span. It was whistling. Wow. It was whistling down there. Is that what he said? Yeah.

All right. Well, there we go. Barbecue meats. So who wins? Sausage. I don't know. Sausage? I think sausage.

Pre-cooked sausage. Not pre-cooked sausage. Booge. God damn it. Pork and finnell. Yes. Lamb and mint. Sausage. Some kind of booge sausage. A booge sausage. A boo it. Pork and finnell. Yes. Okay, right. Lamb and mint. Some kind of boog sausage.

A boog sausage. A boog sausage takes the barbecue crown. See, I would just say sizzlers. Oh, my God. Man, that's the closest I've come to swearing on the radio. I had to bite my tongue halfway through the word. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Yesterday at the airport through Wellington Airport,

which is one of the airports in New Zealand that requires me to take boots off. Yeah. But then I had my Doc Martens on. I took mine off as a precaution because last time I flew back from Wellington, they were like, we're going to need you to take your boots off. I was like, yeah.

You just did an ankle. Problem is I look too cute to be a terrorist. You're way too cute. You've got a gruff beard and a beanie. You look very Unibomber in a cabin in the middle of America plotting to the end of the world. It's actually my aesthetic. That's what I'm going for.

Sort of a reclusive genius, plagued by his own, you know, incredible smarts. Tortured by his own genius. Yes. Also writes poetry on the side. That's me. I didn't have to leave. I left my boots on. I got through airport security side. Yeah. That's me. So I didn't have to leave. I left my boots on.

Yeah. I got through airport security fine. Yeah. You didn't beep. I didn't beep. Yeah. I took all the precautions, belt off,

shoes off, everything off, jacket off. Yeah. Yeah. You were in your knickers. I was. I was stripped down right out to my undies.

I thought it was a bit much. He almost went to pull those off and the guy was like, eh. Precautionary. Yeah. And then I went to pull those off, and the guy was like, hey. It was precautionary. Yeah, and then I went through last, and I said as I went through, because one of these bangles has got some cheap metal in it. I don't know which one, but I can never be bothered taking them off. So I just beep, and then they give me a little one down,

and then you go through. So I said as I walked through, I'm a beeper. And it went beep, beep, beep. And then they put you in that little machine where you've got to stand You're through. You go through. Yeah. So I said as I walked through, I'm a beeper. Yeah. And it went beep, beep, beep. And then they put you in that little machine where you get to stand with your hands above your head and spread your legs. And it goes. Do you know like when those were first out, they could see your penis? What if she didn't have one though?

That's pretty rough. I'm mortified. Okay, well no, but they could see your bit. My lip. They could see your outline. Oh my God. Wow, I wasn't going to say that, but yeah. That's wild.

And then they had to make a generic, they made a, what did they do to fix it? They blocked it out or they made a generic image or something. It just changed. Right. But yeah, that would have been a great job, eh? Good Lord. God. Anyway, I went through that and then they said, you know, come over here.

Yeah. And then it brings up an image of a person. And there was this like big red, like, uh-oh, over my left breast. No. Which one am I? Yes, my left breast. To our right. Stage right. Yeah, stage right.

Stage right breast. So I was like, oh, I don't know what that is. Now I was wearing a jumper that had no metal in it, a t-shirt, and a bra that was wire-free, just, you know, like a stretchy. So I was like, I don't know what that is. And she was like, oh, what could that be? And I said, I don't know. And then so she said, do you mind if I give you a pat down?

And I was like, that's absolutely fine. And I was a metre away. And at this point, I turned around to see this happen. Yeah. And then because it wasn't like, you know, around my middle or anything, she had to absolutely, I'll use the word smear, she had to smear her hands across my titty. But she did ask.

So there was consent and she asked. But she was using the ask So there was consent And she asked But she was using The back of her hands Because I guess You can't grope someone If you're using The back of your hands Yes

But because I don't wear I mean that's not You can't take that To work today And say it wasn't a grope Susan It was the back of my hand Yeah No you can't

Susan's standing At the photocopier And she feels the back Of someone's hand Grabbing her rump She's like excuse me And he's like well I heard on the radio This morning It's not a sudden. She feels the back of someone's hand grabbing her rump. She's like, excuse me. And he's like, well, I heard on the radio this morning. It's not griping.

Sure. But because I don't wear a super, I hate bras. So I wear the bare minimum sort of stretchy thing. Because I don't do that, there's not a lot of support. I was gobsmacked to see this. She ran her hand over your brief. Up and down my boob. Up and down.

To the point where it was like my boob was moving. But they have metal detecting wands. They shouldn't be touching you. There's no need to do that. But she already beat you in the wand. No, I'd beat you in the machine. She was wearing bracelets. She just warned me. She was in the machine. She had to do the secondary machine where you put your hands up.

But the bracelets didn't turn up. That's the thing. On the body, because the bracelets would have been up here. On the body, it was the boob. So she gave it a good bloody jiggle around. Do you think there's a back, there's an overriding code if they want to fill up some hot chick's boob? Surely not. I'm sure they're very professional.

If you get off from smooshing the back of your hand into someone's boob. I don't know what people get off on, Vaughn. Have you seen the internet? It's 2022. People like everything. Well, and then you had a theory that I have an undisclosed nipple ring. Well, that was my next thing. I said to Hallie, is there something you need to tell us about your nips?

My nips? I don't have a nipple ring. How did it go off then? I don't know. How did it go off? I said to her, maybe I swallowed some metal and it's jammed in my rib cage. Oh, yeah, maybe you've still got a bullet from your time in Afghanistan. My time in Falkland.

Yeah, at the Falklands. Yeah. Oh, we fought hard. Yeah, I mean, that war happened before you were born, but maybe you were shot and you died, but you were reincarnated. Your mum might have been shot when she was serving in Vietnam. Got stuck in her uterus. Yeah.

And then when I was in the uterus, it came into me. Yes. You grew around the bullet. Well, let me just text Patsy to see if she served in the Falklands. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Ready for the big game this weekend? Will the All Blacks or Ireland come out on top? Okay.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. It's about downtime. Oh, that was good. Thank you, Rachel. That was good. That was great. Thank you, Rachel. That was good. That was great. Thank you. Rachel's in the studio like she always is.

Of course. But we just don't acknowledge you and we just carry on talking. Yeah. And you just walk out of the room most of the time, don't you? Yeah. Yeah. It's your last day today. It is my last day today, sadly.

I've had a blast here. Thanks, guys, for having me on your show. It's been awesome. But the husband has got a job opportunity in the Middle East, and so we are off. Oh, my goodness. People will know your husband from TV3, won't they? If they watch the news, I guess.

Yeah. Tom. Media power couple. Tom. Tom McRae, yeah. Oh, I thought she was married to Martin Rodgers. Oh. Lucky thing.

He's three or Samantha Hayes, I assume. Yeah, yeah. Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom. Tom, Tom. He's moving overseas to Last Day Today. Last Day Today, yep. So he will be going off to Al Jazeera and I'll be looking after the family over there,

making sure it all goes well. Right. Is there a job opening? Was there a job opening over there, was there? This was signed up months ago. This has been in the pipeline for a long time. Excellent. Nice.

Are you looking forward to the warmth? I think so. The endless warmth. It was 48 yesterday. What? 48 degrees? Yeah, so it might be a little too hot. But apparently their aircon is pretty top notch over there.

I was going to say, you're going to a conservative... You can't wear little skimpy shorts in a singlet when it's 48 degrees no absolutely no singlet shoulders covered at all times unless you're in your home what about topless sunbathing in your own home

maybe inside the walls of your home certainly not outside them oh jeepers are you allowed a naked shower preferably not inside in your bathroom

in your bathroom I don't think the country is that conservative it's a country of nevernudes that you have to wear togs in your own shower. Well, thank you so much, Rachel. I've really appreciated your work and we'll miss you.

Thank you so much. You guys are absolute legends. You're top professionals. You're so natural at what you do and you work so, people don't know how much work goes on behind the scenes. You guys are amazing. See, she read that script just like, she's reading the news, reading that script they wrote about how legendary we are.

Brilliant. Rachel, thank you. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Friday. Flashback. Flashback. Flashback.

Well, it's a Friday tradition. We take turns each week picking a song that's at least 10 years old. It's got to be a banger. It's Hayley's turn this week. Now, I've gone all the way back to 2003. Now, 2003 was my first year of high school. Yeah, me too. Same.

I don't think that lines up. What? I don't think that lines up. I'm eight years your junior. Anyway, so it was released in 2003. They called the genre alternative slash indie rock, but it was definitely the return of... We called it...

I worked at a station that played this sort of music, and we called it, like, the new rock and roll. Right. Because it wasn't rock. It wasn't 90s rock. It wasn't grunge. It wasn't alternative. It was this real, like, 70s-influenced,

80s glam rock influenced rock and roll. Yeah. Well, this did pretty well. I don't think it ever reached number one, number 40 in Australia so that's a good sign. Number 10 in New Zealand in the charts. A few people have already guessed it on the text machine so I won't

say any more. This is The Darkness. I believe in a thing called love. Yeah, it's your Friday flashback. On, sit in. My heart's in overdrive and you're behind the steering wheel Touching you Touching me Touching you Touching me I believe in a thing called love I can't touch you, I can to kiss you every minute, every hour, every day

You got me in a spin but everything is okay Touching you Touching you Touching me Touching you Touching me I believe in a big cold love Just a little diamond in my heart There's a chance we can make it now

We're looking for the sun goes down I believe in'm in cold love Ooh, ooh, ooh Guitar! Touching you Touching me Touching you Touching me Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you

Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you Touching you We've been looking for the sun guys don't I'm leaving the cold Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh

Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh It's the Darkness, your Friday flashback from 2003, I believe, in a thing called love.

Holy, I just, I wanted an honest feedback and it's not that I don't trust you, Vaughan, but I did just open the text machine myself and I accept these words of praise. Oh, is it praise? This took me back to belting this out on Wii Rock. That's a Nintendo Wii. Oh, yes.

My daughter now hates Friday Flashback after me blasting this and singing it at the top of my lungs. I mean, if you can get that last bit, Justin Hawkins,

was that his name? Yeah. There was a brother from the band. Was it on Sing Star or Guitar Rock? They had something on Sing Star.

Guitar Hero. Guitar Hero. Oh, yes. He could belt that out. Maybe that's the Wii. Yeah, the Wii Rock had that as well. Rip of a Flashback. Oh, yes. Yeah, you could belt that out. Maybe that's the Wii. Yeah, the Wii Rock had that as well. Ripper of a flashback.

This is so good. Someone in the capital letter says, yes, bitch. Oh, hey. Mind your language, please. In a positive. I'm confused by that because I feel like they're supporting me, but now they're calling me the B word. Yeah.

Ripper. Someone said, please stop this flashback. No. No. Wow, we won't. We're ruining our fun. Cheer up, it's Friday. Somebody said that reminds me, oh, there was a bar here.

This reminds me of the Fox and the Viaduct. Never went there. They must have cranked it. Somebody took me back. We were reminiscing when we were in Tauranga where we drove past the old grumpy mole. Oh, yeah. Remember the grumpy mole?

I remember the grumpy mole. How could you forget? Yeah. Well, good. Good, good, good. Now, you would have seen this probably because it was a very funny moment. It happens to a lot of women.

But Jacinda Ardern, as they loved to call her, was doing a press conference and a News Hub reporter in Europe, Europe correspondent, Lisette Riemer, was wearing the exact same dress.

The exact same dress. Now, the Prime Minister takes all the journalists because she's doing the big European tour at the moment. She's met all the leaders that are having a big NATO

or a Chogom or whatever they call it. Yeah, Chogom NATO. And they go on the plane, all the leaders at, they're having a big NATO or a Chogham or whatever they call it. Yeah, Chogham NATO. And they go on the plane, all the press, the Herald, the staff, the TV reporters, they're all on the same plane. So they fly to the different locations. Yeah. Yeah. Now you would think that this press, this journalist would have seen the Prime Minister in the dress first, right?

Yeah. And thought, I won't wear this now? I don't know if she got to that thing and Jacinda had gone and changed. Because Jacinda was in this dress all day. Right. So I'd seen a couple of photos of Jacinda in this dress, it's like a blue dress. And then to be fair, the reporter said,

well, I put on blue. I thought that was the safe option because typically Jacinda does not wear blue. Because it's the party. The colour of the opposition. Yeah. I thought that was the safe option because typically Jacinda does not wear blue. Because it's the party. The colour of the opposition. Yeah. I thought she'd probably be wearing red, so I wore blue. You won't see Christopher Luxon in a red dress.

That's for sure. Which I think, exactly, he's robbing us of an opportunity there. I'd love to, you know, have a bit of a go. Have a look at that figure. Yeah. Have a little look. So she asks her a question. The reporter, like, tries not to say anything.

She asks her a question and Jacinda just goes, nice dress. Now it's a New Zealand designer, right? Yeah, I think it is. I can't, I won't say who it is because I don't know for sure if it's that designer. But this is the thing with New Zealand designers. It's like

everyone in the media wears it. I love outfit snap. When I see someone wear the media wears it. I love outfit snap. I love when I see someone wear the same thing. I'm like, hey! No, I don't think people enjoy it as much as I do. Like at a wedding, that's everyone's idea at a wedding. When at a wedding you're rocking and you're wearing a Hallenstein's $200 suit and shirt combo

and another dude is and you're like, hey! I mean, but suits are sort of, you can't decipher one from the other. A lot of the time. A suit's a suit. But a dress, this is like a particular print, a particular colour, a particular cut. Happens to women a lot. Like, what if the dress that we were with the other day when you were shopping and you bought, you're wearing that to our school ball, our radio awards. Listen up, radio ladies.

I'm wearing Caitlin Crisp. It's a black dress. Your bag's got dibsies. Okay, so no one else is allowed to wear a black dress. Would you put this in the top five current global problems facing women? Yeah. We've got Roe v. Wade.

I mean, climate change. Climate change, yeah, very much so. Coronavirus. Wage gap. Equity. Gender equality Yeah And is there gonna be

Another chick wearing The same dress as me Yeah okay cool Top five Top five Roe v. Wade Dress thing Kind of on par

Yeah Right It's absolutely traumatising When this happens to you Anyway we wanna hear These stories of when You have had an outfit Twin

Maybe you've turned up To an event A clothing snap An absolute clothing snap. Because I think it is worse if it's, I mean, yeah, like a shirt or a suit, like you say, like very much the same. But if it's a dress.

Something distinct. I would want to go home. You guys often wear similar clothes. Especially in the summer when you're just rocking a t-shirt. Yeah, yeah. Well, when I used to play rugby, I'd rock up and there'd be bloody 14 other clowns in the same outfit as me. How embarrassing.

Wait, bloody hell. I get it. What are you guys? Snap. But I hate it because if they look better in it than you do, that is the worst. I know. If they don't look better in it, then you win. And everyone, it's always really obvious that one person is clearly rocking it better than the other.

And you know that everyone at this event or wherever you are is going like, huh. Yeah. It's more a her dress than a she dress. I know people, when you go snowboarding and you're in a massive queue for the cheer lift, if I see someone wearing the same jacket as me, I'm like, hey! I love it. People don't. No, don't do that.

No. Because everyone up there thinks that they're the only one with that bloody jacket. Yeah. We want to take your calls now. 0800 dials at M. Give us a call. 9696 to text us. When did you have an outfit twin?

We're talking about when you had an outfit twin. Europe correspondent for News Hub. So Missy Lissette's based in Europe. Yeah, she is. She wouldn't have been

on the plane. She would have been because they don't take them. If you're based there you've got to find your own way there. So do you think she had this, if it was a New Zealand designer, was sent over by News Hub

for her to wear? Yeah, probably. They'd send her wardrobe, I imagine. Oh, so embarrassing. So when have you had a clothing twin? Some of these stories are so funny. I would go home and change

for a lot of these stories. Or do like a Cinderella sort of thing. Or, you know, like go home and change for a lot of these stories. Or do like a Cinderella sort of thing or you know like go in and rip off a sleeve tie you know like tie something around the middle

in real life like a dozen fictional words. Cut the hem off. Yeah. Somebody messaged and he's like from the guy's point of view this happened to me

at a wedding once I was wearing the same shirt and suit as a guy quite an unusual shirt and we hung out we became mates and now I've got my best friend. Aww. Aww.

Hey, we're dressed the same. We should be friends. That sounds like a good idea. Let's be friends. That sounds like something you would do. I love to be friends. That sounds like something you would do, actually. Yeah, absolutely.

Claudia, when did you have a clothing twin? So my year 12 after ball, I had a girl wearing the exact same dress as me, like thigh-high socks and chucks. Oh, okay. Everything the same, but I made her look very flat-chested. Yeah, girl. Fill it out. What's you all these years later been like?

Absolutely, filling it out. Good for you. It helped that I didn't like her as well. Oh, right. So she was like your nemesis. You wore it better. Good for you. It helped that I didn't like her as well. Oh, right. So she was like your nemesis. You were it better. Yeah, right. She was just a teacher's pet, you know,

and I absolutely wasn't. I'm getting bad girl vibes off you. Yeah, I like you. I think you would have been nice. Big troublemaker. Claudia, thanks for your call. Hannah, this was a school ball twinsie situation as well. Hi.

Yeah, it was my year 13 leavers ball. So the last hurrah. Yeah. Oh, no. And so what was the same, the dress? Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, the funny thing that was is that a girl in our high school year group, she actually made a Facebook group to share dresses. So we didn't all like

so this wouldn't happen yeah but I thought oh you know mine will be fine I got it from like an obscure sort of shop overseas so um there would be no chance but um it happened oh no did she not share a photo did you not check the Facebook group um neither of us shared the photo so you both just thought I've gone bougie boutique? Oh, yeah, I don't need to share the photo. I don't need to do that. Oh, wow. I didn't say bougie, but yeah.

Did you make the most of it, or did you just kind of avoid each other the whole night? Yeah, oh, no, it was fine. Yeah, I mean, like, we weren't really in the same friend group, but, like, we got on, and she was absolutely fine. But she was like, oh, we should get a Fido high. And I was like, oh, no. Please no, I don't remember this moment. I would have gone out back and soaked

it in a bottle of Merlot. Bleach? Yeah, or tea. And then, yeah, bleach it and then you've got a white or a red dress. Yeah, but then you stink like Earl Grey all night. Or bleach. Or red wine, which for you 13 balls, probably not good either. Hannah, thanks for your call.

Cornelia, good morning. This happened to your mum. Yes, hi, good morning. Good morning. It was my graduation from high school. Yeah. And I don't know what the brand was, but she bought the most unique dress out there.

And then turns out my high school dean for my year wore the exact same one. And my mum's not the, you know, she's not the slimmest. And my dean is a very good body. So she was a bit gutted. So she's rocking it. And she's just sitting there having a few more wines than normal

kids. And then I dragged her over to my day and I forced her to get a photo He rocked it. Brilliant. Corns, thanks, you call. I don't know, are we going with that nickname? Corns? What's your nickname? Everyone calls me Corn. Everyone calls me Corn. Yeah, Corns, I thought so. We've been talking about this morning how much we bloody love corn. On the barbecue.

So we're big fans. Or the Korean corn with the chilli oil and the mayo. Oh, my God. Or the Japanese. Or the paprika and the chilli. Stop me now. Fantastic. Thanks, Corns.

James, good morning. This happened to you in the office. Yeah, yeah. So we had a bit of snap triplets. Wow. Yeah, turned up to work one day, and three of the boys all wearing the exact same long-sleeved, purple collared shirt.

Purple? Good for you. Looking like a bloody Teletubbies reunion. Abani, Abani. Is that Tinky Winky? I don't know. Yeah, yeah. I don't know which one the purple one was. Yeah, it was Tinky Winky. Gay Icon, though. Yeah, right. Gay Icon, the purple Tinky Winky? I don't know. I don't know which one the purple one was.

Yeah, it was Tinky Winky. Gay Icon, though. Yeah, right. Gay Icon, the purple Tinky. Or Grimace. But this is a problem when men get three shirts from three wise men for whatever it is. That's it. Or Barkers get a Barkers.

Yeah, I think it might have been a cheap special. You bloody tarot cash gang. Oh, purple. We had a game of who wore it best But I lost The other boys Oh, great No, well you Winners are now

It sounds like somebody Wants us to sing You are beautiful No matter what they say Oh, go on then Every day I'm going to start I wasn't going to start

Just go from the hook You are beautiful No matter what they say Words won't bring James down Beautiful, no matter what they say. Words won't bring James down. No, no, no. So don't you bring James down. Oh, you made my day.

You're gorgeous, babe. You're a gorgeous boy. Thank you, James. Gorgeous boy. You get out of here, you gorgeous boy. You purple boy. Purple treat. Christchurch Cup, you gorgeous boy. You purple boy. Purple treat. Christchurch Cup Day. Tarot Cash purple boy.

Beautiful little tinky-winky. Tarot Cash. Three shirts for 150 bucks. Beautiful little boy. Christchurch Cup Day. Ended up in the same dress as my friend's mum. She's very trendy though and keeping it tight. Oh, yeah.

That's catching on. Her mum's keeping it tight. Let's be honest. You don't remember a thing from about 11 a.m.? Oh, it's only a couple of hours till you soil yourself in it. That's it, really, isn't it? Yeah. Someone said my sister actually turned up to pick me up for Banger's Bingo on Tuesday

in the same shirt as me. Oh, God. We accidentally twin our clothes all the time, but... I don't think I noticed a double up at Banger's Bingo. No, they changed because she came to my house to pick me up, so I just nipped in and changed. Knowing us, we may have relentlessly teased him about it too. Yeah, we would have. Oh, we absolutely would have set up on you.

Like wolves on an injured elk. I was invited to a wedding, bought the dress from House of Pagani. Oh, good shot. And it turns out the bridesmaid had the same dresses. Now, this is a very common message we've had. And someone else here turned up to a wedding, immediately noticed the colour of the groomsman's ties

was exactly the same as the dress he was wearing. And I was like, to my husband, who, you know, knew them as well, I was like, you've got to go and ask them what colour the dresses are. He's like, don't worry about it. Don't do that. You're bloody worrying about nothing, mate. And they were the same. Yeah. That's happened to a lot of people. Don't do that. You're bloody worrying about nothing, mate. And they were the same. Yeah.

That's happened to a lot of people. Exactly the same dress. The trend of like getting bridesmaids dresses made is like done. Like no one is really doing that anymore. Big gowns and stuff.

You just store bought. Yeah, totally. Do you think, does it ruin the wedding if you post to all of your guests and say, here are the bridesmaids dresses? Yeah, you could.

Or at least the colour. At least the colour. Even I ask, I've got to make it in Mary next year. I was like, tell me your colour palette. You did. Yeah, I asked so many times. You did. Yeah, and it's good.

What's the palette? Yeah, what's the palette? I'm in the bridal party, but I can tell, Sade, this is the palette. You're not in the bridal party. You can be complimentary, but don't. But don't. Don't hit the brief too hard. Yeah, don't follow the brief.

God, a lot of young people, eh, dressing the same dress as old ladies. My sister's wedding, I wore the same Pagani dress as the groom's mother. I'm 30. She must be in her 70s. It was awkward. Oh.

Yeah. Shout out Pagani for just great sort of semi-formal wedding wear. Go somewhere boutique. What was that place? Chanton. Chanton. Yeah. Get out Pagani for just great sort of semi-formal wedding wear. Go somewhere boutique. What was that place? Chanton. Chanton. Yeah.

Get to Chanton. Carolina Eve. Guess the flowers aren't just used for big apologies. I guess I should have been more conscious how you spoke to me. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Guys, I come forth today on Friday with bad news.

Oh, no. Bad news. Oh, Vaughan. I hate to do this to you. Guys, I come forth today on Friday with bad news Oh no Bad news Oh Vaughan I hate to do this to you Who are you, Bad News Brad? Bad News Barry with some bad news about magenta The colour The colour

Magenta, is that like a Purply pink Purply, I was going to say purply pink Right Magenta's tucked somewhere between red and violet. Yep. But it doesn't exist. What do you mean it doesn't exist?

Of course it exists. No, it doesn't exist. Actually, magenta's got a Wikipedia page, so it exists. Fact of the day. Magenta doesn't exist. What? Because this is, I've read this a lot. It's about light, refraction of light.

Okay. So what would you say pink is? It's pink. It's red though, right? Pink is pink. It's like a whited down red. It's a sweet red. Pink uses the same wavelength as red.

So it's just red. Okay. It's our red. Our red. So I hate to say it, pink technically doesn't exist either because it's just our red. Right. Magenta doesn't have... Who's gonna tell her? Did Razine know

about this? They've got a whole colour chart. Oh, they're in on it right. Don't tell me they don't know about this conspiracy. Oh, here we go. So, no, it's actually scientific. So magenta doesn't have a wave length, thus it doesn't exist. You might be thinking, Vaughn, you're talking absolute pot, mate.

What about my printer cartridges that print in cyan, yellow, and magenta? And the blue. Well, that's red. That's an optical illusion. It's red. What do you mean it's an optical illusion? Magenta doesn't exist. But it isn't an optical illusion because it's how we see it.

So it's from opposite ends of the... So if you look at a rainbow, right? Somewhere right now there's probably a rainbow. That's quite handy if you can have a gawk at that. You'll notice that the two colours that make up magenta are red and violet and they're on the opposite ends of the light spectrum and the light spectrum isn't circular. No, it goes top to bottom.

Yeah, it goes top to bottom. It's linear. Yeah. So magenta is a mix of two colours that would never mix and don't exist on the same wavelength. So technically it doesn't exist. So your brain won't allow that. So it's like, I've got to work something out here.

So your brain will either see magenta as green, which doesn't work because we've already got greens. Yeah. Or it will see it as magenta. It's like, I'll just, I'll take care of this. This is great about the brain. So when some people can see green. I'm not going to worry the rest of the body with this.

Eyes, you just send me some info. I'll blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'll deal with it. I'll send it back to you. Interesting. Extra spectral. Yeah, it's extra spectral. It doesn't fit on the spectrum.

It's not on the spectrum of light. It's literally your brain being like, well, something needs to exist there. So we'll just pop it out. That's wild. So we'll just fill in the gap there. That's a lot of info for a Friday. Yeah, I'm overwhelmed, man. Very overwhelmed.

It's a lot to take on board, man. I don't like to be told that what I'm seeing isn't real. Yeah. But it is. But it isn't. I've shifted my whole perspective on the world. Well, I don very overwhelmed. It's a lot to take on board, man. I don't like to be told that what I'm seeing isn't real. Yeah. But it is. You've kind of shifted my whole perspective on the world. Well, I don't know. I have definitely had this conversation with Fletch, and I don't know if we've had this conversation,

that I don't know if what I see as red is what you see as real. Oh, yeah. How do blind people dream? In colour? What is colour? Yes. What is colour? Exactly. your perception

of green is different. We both identify the leaf as green but what I see as my green could be your blue or red. And then when you try to describe a colour you can't do it without using other colours or other tones. So you go like orange, it's sort of a warm

then what? Bright. Okay, again, this is too deep for a Friday. This is way too deep for a Friday. Yeah. I'm just saying, I don't think we should be rushed. What a blind BBC, man. I don't think we should rush. If you were born blind. I don't know, but this could help.

I don't know, man. I don't know. So today's fact of the day is magenta. I'm sorry to break this to you. It doesn't exist. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, Some people's app has turned into dark mode, like gone black background. I've always used dark mode. Dark horse in a dark mode. Have they done the update for everybody or they're rolling it out?

I don't have it, but I've got some of them. Yeah, so I've got a lot of these new layout features. So like the full screen, take up the entire screen a la TikTok? Like if you're scrolling through your feed, yeah, a video, if it's a reel, is full. And also, there's a lot more people that you don't follow.

They're just chucking reels in there willy-nilly. That's the one I hate. It's like, because you follow so-and-so, we thought you'd like this. I'm like, this is my curated space.

Get out of here. Another one is like, the inbox has changed place from top to bottom. So, for like, OG Instagram users, it's gone back to the layout it used to have. Mine's still up top.

Where the inbox is at the bottom and you get the little bubble if you've got a message, which I prefer. And that's also where you post now. You used to be able to post from the bottom as well? No, I'm posting from top and messages at the top. Yeah, it's moved all of that down. The only one left at the top is Love Hearts, your activity feed.

Yeah. And the options. Well, because we've got nothing more to complain about, everyone is just like taking to Twitter, a flawless platform. Yeah. And just absolutely bagging on it. We hate it.

Boycott. And saying boycott just for some changes. Yeah, some companies even, Shake Shack in the States was like boycott Instagram. What? Because of the changes and how it's all, yeah, it's like you're not choosing your own thing. This is like very reminiscent of Facebook in like 2010 when they changed how they did something.

Can you remember? Like, I don't like the new Facebook. Shut up. Delete it then. And you're supposed to go to the original one. You could go to the old. Yeah, you could go back to the last before they upgraded it. But you get used to it. You get used to it.

We're learning new things. But I don't understand how they choose who gets the updates and who doesn't because I don't have them. Other than my full. Yeah. It sounds like they're just trialling it on a few people, a few users. Yeah. Just, you know, like VIPs, select people. It's like VIPs. The VIPs have got

some of the updates. And then I guess that'll be all of us soon. Yeah. Just, you know, like VIPs select people. It's like VIPs. The VIPs have got some of the updates. And then I guess that'll be all of us soon. Yeah. Like you say, everyone's like, boycott, boycott, boycott. You'll get over it in like two weeks. Boycott, boycott, say the addicted phone users of the world. Yeah, absolutely. How else am I going to see your tush? Yeah.

If not on Instagram. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, somebody's worked out the average time people set their alarm for and the average time people snooze for. The average time people's alarms go off for the average, not for us. We've got to be here at, you know, five, don't we? 647 AM. That uneven number is really... 6.47?

Yeah, they've gone for average between 6.40 and 7 and 6.45 and 10 to 7. If you're setting a wake up alarm that has an uneven number it's either got to be a 0 or a 5, right? You're not going like 6.42 This will stress you out because

before I started a 4am alarm clock job, I set all sorts of alarms. So here's my ones for when I first started and I got nervous. There's a 404, 405, 510, 515, 525, 35, 33, 437, sorry. Oh, no. See, just go even. 451, 454.

No. 514. I mean, I'm screwed at that point, aren't I? There's no excuse. I, just go even. 451, 454. No. 514. I mean, I'm screwed at that point, aren't I? There's no excuse. I've got so many. The average alarm goes off 647, and people snooze for an average of 25 minutes. Yeah, absolutely.

You should be... Not at four in the morning, I don't, because I don't have that kind of luxury. But see, okay, you say you set your alarm for 6.45 and you're a snoozer for 25 minutes. Yeah. Just set your alarm for 7.05 and get the F up. Then I'll be late

because I'll probably just snooze again a couple of times at 7.05. No, you just get up and then you have beautiful uninterrupted sleep for another 25 minutes. No, because I'm a slow riser. I'm a natural riser. If I'm awoken by an alarm I'm a mess. So it's got to like wake me

and then I go back to sleep and then I wake up the second time and I'm better. So then on the third time I'm ready to go. But then next to you, your lovely wife Sade who is sleeping in until I'm imagining what, seven? Yeah, quarter to seven. Quarter to seven? She doesn't hear it. She's woken up three or four times. Nah, she

doesn't hear it. It's so you think. No, if it woke her up, I'd know about it. No, Aaron hates it. I'd be hearing about it. But so, he will hear it and wake up. And you hear me go he'll be like, okay, it's quiet then. Off it goes again. But the third one, he's like, get out. Yeah, but why don't you just

set it ten minutes later? Because if I set it ten minutes later, I'm going to do the same behaviour pattern just 10 minutes later. No, you just get up. Don't try to change your ear. No, I won't change. I refuse to change. I'm perfect. I'm flawless. There's nothing to work on. Oh my god, it really dulls my head. This article also says that

if you wake up at 4am, that is the key to being better at work and getting the most out of your day. No, you feel like a sack of shite in the afternoon. No, it's not because it's just about to be nine and I'm exhausted. So that's absolutely not the truth. If you don't have to get up at 4am,

do not do it. No. Don't do it.