ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 1st March 2023

Episode Date: February 28, 2023

Silly Little Poll!  Top 6: Animal Movies  That Didn't Happen!  Vaughan got Snaked  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Start your day with a great tasting McCafe coffee made just the way you like it. Now, you will notice in today's podcast, if you listen to any part of the live show, you might not notice because it is so subtle, actually. We've had a lot of fun today. We've had a is so subtle actually. We've had a lot of fun today We've had a lot of fun today

Oh yes, because yesterday producer Jared messaged the group chat I'm just trying to find the exact chat There he is Look at him He's handsome isn't he? Is that why we're looking at him? I wasn't going to say that, I was going to say

he cracked the whip yesterday, didn't he? Tuesday, 11.27am, I found the conversation. FVH, that's how we're addressed as a collective. Who's watching maths? And I said, Jared, I'll say this once, fuck off. To which Jared said, this is not coming from me, it's coming from Ross, so I'll be sure to pass it along. And I said, be sure to.

Hayley then said, yes yes i'm watching maths jared responds sick lots of eyes ross wants us to mention it for more reasons because it's popular and stuff he said are you guys talking about maths in the morning and i said ha ha ha no and he, no. And he said, could they? And I said, I can talk about how much I hate it. Yeah. And Carwin said, ooh, it's a terrible season. I would rather grate my genitals on a grater than watch Meredith. No, it's so good.

And then Farron said, I think as a challenge tomorrow, we can seamlessly mention maths at least 10 times. I did. So then we agreed that we would try to mention it every single time we talked and we would ring a bell every time we did shannon at the social media desk i believe is going to create uh a little something something a visual a montage i believe how many times did you count us seamlessly, subtly mentioning Married at First Sight today? I think I haven't counted properly, but we're probably close to 40. Yes!

And within those 40, there were multiple mentions. That's 40 moments. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm editing quickly. So what we've done here is we've related to the listener who is watching Married at First Sight and then in turn they relate to our radio show now better.

Oh, boy, do they. And they're like, I will never listen to another radio show because those guys love maths and I love maths. And I love maths. We've got things in common. We're the same. Yeah. Now, I think when you do the video,

the video itself should almost be a reaction video where down in the bottom corner is a video a counter in one corner but in the other corner it's Ross's face as he watches the video of us taking his advice for the show and this is his job and us being immature little shits being like

you want us to talk about that? Master you motherfucker we haven't heard from him this morning usually when we take something he says a little too literally he'll message us during the show

and say guys you cheeky bastards you bastards it was a lot of fun I had a lot of fun now I just rang a bell for a different reason because usually this bell

is when a hot person walks past the studio somebody did message in this morning saying are there a lot of hot people walking past the studio oh god she looks like

she'd read your bloody aura you probably would I'm not marrying her Are there a lot of hot people walking past the studio? Oh, God, she looks like she'd read your bloody aura. You probably would. I'm marrying her. It looks like she wants to align your bloody chakras, mate. I do need a chakra align. I think that's what I need in my bag. Are you talking about what you're getting aligned at the end of the week?

Jesus Christ. Stay tuned Monday. There's a little tease for you. This is going to be very interesting You wouldn't see this on maps This is not a fun radio bit, I'm trying to take it very seriously But we'll see if I'm able to Monday's podcast

Yeah, you can explain I'll share with you what I'm doing on Friday Have we ticked off Meredith First Sight For fucking ever now? I think we've done enough I can't stand that fucking show It's terrible and I think it's irresponsible That these people are qualified professionals

and they're being bullied by producers to make bad matches for the drama. And then they let people crucify themselves on television. I know. I would say there are two relationships. I'm watching it. I'm hooked. But there are two relationships so far in the season, and we're only up to like 12 or whatever,

that you would call abusive. Like emotionally so. Oh, really? It's so cooked. Don't watch it. But you see, you're behind in Last of Us. Great writing, this television show. I'm behind in Last of Us because I'm watching Physical 100.

And so I can't watch that until I've caught up with Physical 100. But I can't catch up on Physical 100 because I've been watching maths and trying to get that. I'm up to date. So today, Physical 100. Tomorrow, Last of Us. I'm back. You haven't even up on Physical 100 because I've been watching maths and trying to get that. I'm up to date. So today, Physical 100. Tomorrow, Last of Us. I'm back. You haven't even started on Bluey.

Fuck off. Okay, tomorrow we'll seamlessly mention Bluey in every voice. He does it anyway. He does it anyway. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Thank you, Sam. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

Good morning. Someone a little tired today? Yeah, I stayed up very late catching up on maths last night. Maths. I'm obsessed. Tonight's episode of tell you what. Tonight's episode of maths is going to be the best episode of Mavs you've ever watched. Probably not.

It's a bit of a rubbish season. How dare you? No, I'm kidding. Have you watched the last of us latest episode yet? Well, I was too busy watching Mavs. Are you kidding me? I had a choice to make. I had a busy day yesterday.

I got a little drunk in the afternoon and had to have a sleep. Do you remember when I was like, do you want to come to the gym with me? She's like, no, I'm so busy. You went over to the pub and had a drunken nap. She was busy having a date. What's the question? Day date. Aaron wanted to take me out for a date and then we ordered food.

Wasn't that nice? Yeah. Then we ordered food and it took an hour and 45 minutes to turn up. So all we had to do was just keep ordering the wines. That's what I'd do if I ran a restaurant. Just make the kitchen deliberately late with the food. No, because then they won't come back. Oh, yeah, that's true.

Repeat customs. That's why I keep going out of business with my restaurant ideas. Yeah, I do. Yeah. I'd load it up with MSG. You love MSG. God damn, I love MSG. We were all told it was so naughty.

No, it's not. But it's so yummy. I follow so many cooking channels that just use it as a normal ingredient without the taboo of it. It was like, didn't it get looked into? It was racist. The MSG bashing was anchored in racism, wasn't it? My goodness me. Because third world countries and it was like a predominantly Asian.

Right, but it wasn't bad for you. No worse than salt, right? No, it's just a type of salt and it's delicious and you can buy it and put it on your food and it makes all your food

taste better. Man, it makes you thirsty. There is nothing like it. Have a glass of water. I'll pan half a dozen beers if I'm out for dinner and it's MSG heavy like the Chinese.

This is what happens when I have that stir-fry goop. Always thirsty after a stir-fry goop. Always thirsty. Lion sodium and MSG, but yum. Wake up the next day a little puffy. Coming up on the show, the top six. Well, on the back of the success of cocaine beer at the US box office. Yeah, Meth Gator has been announced by the people that bought a Sharknado.

So if animals are on drugs, I've got the top six other animals on drugs that would make great movies. It's art, you know. It's just art. They're just making art. They're making art. I've heard nothing but good things about Cocaine Beer. Same. Yeah.

Fun. Well, we spoke to your friend. The cocaine beer. Coming up on the show, I am one of the people, I'm one of the people that have been receiving two census letters.

Are you going to be a naughty boy? And do two censuses? Yeah, play around on one. No, I was just going to, well, I've got the answer

if you've accidentally, quite a few New Zealanders have received two census letters. Right. I've got the answer. If you've accidentally... Quite a few New Zealanders have received two census letters. Right. I've got the answer what to do if you did. All right. Did you get them on the same day? No, like a week apart.

Huh. Yeah. Silly little poll is coming up. Are you top or bottom? Now... Bunk, bunk. Are you top or bottom bunk? Good thing you stopped me there,

because I was about to reveal something about myself. You're a big bottom. You're a big bottom. I'm a big bottom. I don't even know the last time I slept in bunk beds. Was it at an Airbnb that we went to? Probably. Yeah, mine was when I was like touring a show and we had no money and

stayed in a hostel. Creaky. Okay, well, the silly little poll results are coming up, but next on the show... This is wild. You know, the future is coming, and particularly for cars. One car in particular is promising something abnormal.

Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. The Ford people, the car makers, Ford, have applied for a patent. Patent? Patent? Patent.

I say patent. Is it not? Patent. Hayden Patentier? Yeah, it's Hayden Patentier. They've applied for one of those things, for some technology for the future of Ford. Now, some of it is like a system where in the future, a car, if you've missed payments on it, would repossess itself. So if you've borrowed money against this car,

the car will know or whoever you lend the money to will put that into your car. And then if you miss payments, the car will just literally drive itself off. Back to the Ford centre. I've got to tell you about my mate who had his identity stolen. What? A ticked up $20,000 car.

What? What? I don't know if he wants it. How did they do this? It's currently like being looked into by... Dude, it's insane. Oh my God, this is like your worst nightmare because there's nothing you can do.

How did someone do this? He said it's harder for him to prove he's him than it was for them to prove they were. Yeah, wow. He's like, I didn't do this. And they're like, yes, you did. And he's him than it was for them to prove they were. Yeah. Wow. He's like, I didn't do this. And they're like, yes, you did. And he's like, no, I didn't.

And then the onus is on him because he's got to. He has to prove it. He's got to go and what, find footage from the car dealership of whoever signed up for this car? You're a private investigator? It's expensive. They never, the person who lent the loan never met the people. What? Dude.

He's been, he told me two days ago, he's like, what is this area of Auckland like? And I was like, why? I'm like, you're not moving there. You live in bloody paradise, mate. What do you want to move to Auckland for? And he's like, no, it's... And then he's like, I'll tell you. And he told me that, yeah, this is the area,

this is the address of these people that have, like, tried to get farmer's cards, queue cards. Like, you know. Using what, though? Like an ID or a? He didn't know. And it turns out it's his driver's license, which he's never lost. Really?

And he's like, the only time my driver's license has ever been out of my possession was when I was getting a rental car. They took my details. He's like, but I've never used my details. So he only found out because he's building a house and he went to the bank for like the last bit of the tick off the mortgage. And they're like, oh, so what's this? And he's like, what do you mean?

What's this with another loaning place you've got for a loan? Oh, that is my worst nightmare. And you've applied for all of these cards. And he's like, no, I haven't. No, you haven't. Oh, my God. Oh, my God, that could ruin your life. Like, will seriously affect Affect Your credit rating

Yeah Yeah You gotta have good credit He said it's just Yeah this admin nightmare He's like He's pretty sure it'll All get wiped

But in the meantime The admin's just That is wild Yeah Oh my god I'd hate that I was trying to think If I've ever lost my licence But the only time I've ever

Uploaded my licence to anything Other than for like a home loan, was I bought cigars once for Aaron's 40th birthday. Oh, you had to prove you were over 18. I had to prove my age by submitting identification. Well, and that's the thing. If that database gets hacked, which is quite easy to do, it happens all the time.

And I don't blame them. I'm gorgeous. You are, yeah. What I'm worried about is, is this going to affect his ability to get on, you know, travel internationally because his dream is to be on the TV show Mavs? Yeah, so...

So if he can't get to Australia, how's he going to do it? Well, that's the thing. It could affect his international travel. J-Piffs. Oh, you've got to keep me updated with this story because that is just wild. And it's not like it's...

But I'm not going to say who the loan was through, but it's not just some like loan sharky situation. It's like a big place. Yeah, big company. When he said it, I was like, I've heard of them. I've seen them advertised. Like. I'm trying to think about the process because my dad used to own a finance company

and like there is a big process to identify people and you get bank accounts and all this kind of stuff. And they did it all without seeing him in person. And then they, how do you buy a car without seeing someone? Like an actual brand new, from a dealership. Buy now, trade me. Is this car still exist?

Because you've got to get a license plate. They've got a license plate in the VIN. Where's the car? Go and get it! But then they probably flick it off straight away as well. Well, that's what I was wondering. Well, you have to go and trade me and see if that car's there. Oh my God, that's a wild story.

That's awful. And do you know what? It's probably not the only person it's happening to right now. Probably hundreds. That's what he said. Oh, hell yeah. He's like, how many people have this happened to? And the people he's dealing with are like, you'd be surprised.

Jeepers. Well, hopefully their car drives itself off to the wreckage. Drives itself home. Drives itself home. But there'd be great technology. Good technology. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Silly little poe. Silly little poe. It is so silly, silly, silly. That silly little poe. Silly little poe. Silly little Pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that Silly Little Pole. Silly Little Pole. Silly Little Pole. Silly Little Pole.

Silly Little Pole. You are Silly Little Pole, top or bottom bunk. God, this sounds like one of the questions they ask you when you're auditioning for a hit Australian reality TV show, Maths. Yeah, they probably would. They probably would. It's something you probably need to know about your future husband or wife.

Great little question to ask a potential partner. Great little show. I think the last time I had the choice of top or bottom bunk was at an Airbnb. Yeah. And I think I went bottom because it was one of those ones where the bottom's like a double and the top's a single.

Yeah, of course. It's obvious then. But also, I'll go for a midnight wheeze and I know you're the same. Chronic. Like a 2 or 3 a.m. wheeze. Squeak, squeak, squeak. Yeah, and I don't want to have to

climb down the ladder. Yeah. I'm just too big for a top bunk. It's ridiculous. And also, too tall. Yeah. Too close to the roof. Well, people agree.

71% say the bottom bunk, please. 29, however, will do top. A lot of bottoms in New Zealand. A lot of bottoms. It's great for the tops. Bottom nation, they get their pick. They get their pick, don't they? Hannah says top bunk is superior.

Only weak links who might need to use the bathroom in the night sleep on the bottom. Okay, she's called it. My bladder feels personally attacked. You've only got one heart, liver, kidney. Half a heart. Yeah. Probably not much of a good liver left and one kidney. One kidney, one kidney.

That's a kidney. It's a kidney thing. Yeah, probably. Maddie McLean, TVNZ's Maddie McLean and Celebrity Treasure Island finalist. God, can we wait? Maddie McLean. Cannot wait for that show to be over so he stops bloody posting about it. Yeah.

Yeah, shut up, Maddie.Lean. I cannot wait for that show to be over so he stops bloody posting about it. Yeah. Yeah, shut up, Maddie. Shut up. All right, we know you're in the last four. Oh, wow. He doesn't answer if he's top or bottom. He just says, oh, do come on. Laugh face, laugh face. I think he's misread it.

He's misread it as... Quick intro. If I might. Yeah. Homosexual 101. Okay. From an absolute ally in the community. From I might. Yeah. Homosexual 101. Okay. From an absolute ally in the community. From a big community ally.

Now, when two men get together, it's generally discussed if one will be the top and one will be the bottom. Now, you can work out what the top does to the bottom. Yeah. Now, not always. Can you be both? You can be both. Versatile. You're a verse.

But a top or a bottom. And I've got big top energy, I'm told. Really? Big top energy. No, you don't. No, you don't. Do you think I'm a big daddy bottom? You've got big daddy bottom energy.

Everyone thinks I'm big daddy top, but then I'm like, I get to the bedroom and I'm like, big daddy bottom. Yeah. Well, I mean, maybe that's more a silly little pile. It wouldn't be a top or a bottom. Maybe. It's not. And we wouldn't talk about this's silly little pile would more be a top or a bottom. Maybe. It's not. And we wouldn't talk about this if it wasn't still 6 o'clock in the morning.

Happy Pride Month. Happy Pride Month. We had a Pride. Well, it's the 1st of March. Are we not proud anymore? We're not proud anymore. Because it's going to say the... Get rid of the rainbow flag on the logo.

It's gone. Oh, yeah, yeah. Good. There'll be no more gay content on the show. Let's get back to heteronormative, please. Do you know what I love? Men. I love a man.

I love war. I love woman. Yeah. I love steak and I love woman. Yeah. You were literally just saying you were a big daddy bottom. I'm a huge big daddy bottom. Yeah.

In February only. In Feb. Where you will also find my name has always got rainbow. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but now it's just back to a plain logo. We're done with that now. We're back. So where was I at?

Okay, so the top says what it was. I think that was all I wanted to say. So I think that's why Manny McLean's... Yeah. Get your mind out of the gutter, Manny McLean. Yeah. Disgusting. You won't win Treasure Island with that.

That's more of a maths attitude. Yeah, exactly. That's kind of smart you get on that show. Yeah. Caleb says, long-time listener, first-time responder. Yes. Welcome. Welcome, Caleb. That's kind of smart you get on that show. Yeah. Caleb says long time listener, first time responder. Yes. Welcome. Welcome, Caleb. No, my. Hi, to my. I'm a big unit and ain't no chance I'm

climbing up top. Yeah. And we move and it goes the whole thing. Because bunks are never that. They're for kids only, aren't they? Have you ever made love on a bunk? No. No. You'd go bottom. Bottom. You might do a little light frottage on the top. Hands only. No. You'd go... Bottom. Bottom. You might do a little light frottage on the top.

Hands only. Hands. A light frott. Hands up top. A light frott up top. The big funk, the bottom bunk. The bottom bunk. Okay, Lisa says,

Always top because as a kid I was younger so never got to be on top. Even though those couples underneath me in that hostel made the top bunk sway, Lisa's been up top for a light frock. Oh my. The big funk on the bottom bunk. That would vibrate. That would shake the whole ordeal. And they're usually made out of that tin,

like the metal. You know those punks? The metal pipes, the tubes. The metal tubing. The red tubes. Yeah, and it's... Yeah, and the curvy. Powder-coated metal tubing. Oh tubes. The metal tubing. The reed tubes. Yeah, and it's... Yeah, and the curvy. Powder-coated metal tubing.

Oh, God. Ricketing. Hannah says, I'm fat, brackets, working on it, admittedly. Close brackets. But I don't want to fall through and squash my bunk, mate. Don't talk about yourself like that, Hannah. Please. Get up top on that pipe and you'll be absolutely fine.

No, wait a minute. That didn't sound right. Get up top in the pipe and you'll be absolutely fine. No, wait a minute. That didn't sound right. Get up top in the, yeah, whatever. But remember, light front up top, big funk in the bottom bunk. Who the hell can be bothered climbing to bed? That's what somebody else would be like. Some people live in a loft. Wise words.

But that's what our friends that live in a tiny home. When they show me the tiny home, I was like, that's like a bunk every night. Because they climb up to their bed. I know. I could not do that with the amount of wee's I have to do in the middle of the night.

Oh, same. I'd just fall over and have a little window in the tiny home and just whittle, I'd just lean over, open it, whittle out the window,

shut the window again. I'd have a funnel with a tube. A shiwi. I'd have a shiwi. Bronte says, I chose bottom, but on a cruise ship and flea cabin,

I chose top bunk. Easier to do some rumpy pumpy as there's more space above. Just my experience. Who are you rumpy pumping on the cruise ship? So a cruise ship is not a light front up top. One of the dancers. Oh. It's been bunk in both bunk.

That day. That day it's the DJ. Because I knew someone that worked on a cruise ship. Climbing into a little nook. You have to. I knew someone that worked on a cruise ship. You're not have to. I knew someone that worked on a cruise ship. You're not allowed to sleep with the passengers. What fun is that?

Apparently you'd get fired if you got caught. So you'd have to sleep with the crew. I just had a memory. Yeah, I was going to say. Her eyes roll back in her head. Have you been on the P&O, what do they call those ships? The ocean of the Pacific? No.

The Pacific Sea Princess? You've got a memory from the Odyssey of the Pacific? No. The P&O Moist Princess? More military. More military. Oh, you got in the barracks. I simply couldn't share.

She got in the barracks. I simply shouldn't care. In the Oman barracks. Not in Oman. Oman. Jeez. You'd be bloody. I simply couldn't. She got the barracks. I simply shouldn't care. In the Oman barracks. No, no, no. Oman. Oman. Jeez. You'd be bloody hung.

You'd be in big trouble. Jeez, we've had some fun on the show. I just stopped the show. I'm having fun. I'm having fun. It's 6.24. 24 minutes in. I can't believe we've had this much fun in 24 minutes.

It's wild. CBF with Ladders. Now I'm over 30, says Josh. Joe says, if you're innocently talking bunks top, but if we're specifically talking about bunks per se, I'm a big bottom. Oh, okay.

So they'd be like you. Two bottoms don't make a right. Yeah, yeah. You have a lot of threesomes. There's just some negotiating today. Adapt or die, you know. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley. Well, yesterday when I got home, I had a little peek in the mailbox.

Give it a little peek. I'm like, oh. I have to open it to like fully see him, but I had a little peek and I was like, oh my God, there's a letter. Oh my God. Because you do all your bills online. Yeah. So it's not a bill.

I never get anything. I never get anything. And then I was like, oh my God, I saw I opened it and it was a census letter. The code to do my census. Yes. Which I'd already received to do my census. Yes. Which I'd already received like a week ago. Oh. And I was like, oh.

So they've looped back. Yeah, and so it's a whole different code to the household of my address. Do you think that everyone in your apartment got two? You know, because they've been dropping them off sort of willy-nilly. Yeah, so I just kind of chucked it on the bench. I was like, ah, I'll just use one of them. And then saw a story on stuff yesterday.

They'd been contacted. Apparently quite a few people have received double up letters. And apparently it's a small amount of people that have a symbol or a hyphen. So because I'm in an apartment and there's always a dash or a hyphen. So because I'm in an apartment and there's always a dash or a hyphen,

that's kind of screwed with the system by the sounds of it. This is how we got out of paying a power bill once when we were flatting. We were 88 bar one, but they were billing one bar 88. We don't live there. That would imply that there were 88 houses

on number one. Do you remember when my neighbours were paying my power for like four months? That would imply that there were 88 houses on number one. Do you remember when my neighbours were paying my pal for like four months? Because they moved in and they were like, yeah, that's our metre. That's right. And that was like a one hyphen dash away from my metre. Wow, that's lucky. But yeah, so if you've received one, just use any of them.

But don't do both. Don't do both. Because then we'll think there's more than five million. We confuse it. It'll be the same as sort of eight and a half million. Yeah. And it's important

that we all do it because then they figure out stuff like Who's gay? Yeah. Who's gay? Who Who loves Jesus?

Who loves Jesus? Yep. What else is there? Who watches maths? Yeah. Is that a question? Is that a question? Is that not a question? Your habitual television watching isn't a question.

You would have to say you're watching Married at First Sight, aren't you? You're absolutely hooked. Okay. But yeah, very important that we do it. Karwen got sent an actual form. I'm jealous. Oh, you got paid before. You got an actual booklet to fill out.

Yeah, I got analogue census. Can I have a question? Oh, dude, that is so retro. Wow. That's like we're all vaping and they sent you a ciggy. Yeah. Yes. I got a dumb vape.

Yeah. We're all on smartphones and you're rocking at a 3310. Are you allowed to do it online? Yeah, it still had the code with it. But I filled out the forms. You didn't have to come and pick it up and stuff, don't they? No, you just post it. Wait, so you've already done yours?

Yeah. So it's next Tuesday that is the day we're capturing. Yeah, but they're asking on this day, where are you going to be? But what if my plans change? Yeah, what if something happens? You know me, I roll with the wind. If I'm not at Harry Styles, then something's gone very wrong. Horribly, horribly wrong.

Is that why you filled it out a week early? Yeah. I need them to know. Ready for Harry Styles. Okay. I don't know what I'm going to be doing on that day. We're doing some recording for our weekend podcast. That's in the cow.

I think you just fill it out as if it's Tuesday. Nothing else has changed. But I don't know what Tuesday's going to hold, and I want to be honest. The vital information isn't going to change. You're both still living at your house. What if I fill it out now, and between now and Tuesday, I meet God, and suddenly I'm a believer? What am I going to do then?

Then it's going to be wrong. What if I leave Aaron and find a beautiful woman? And then you're single Yeah or I'm single Yeah Or I'm with a woman Yeah Is that going to change

When I put Very quick Very quick Turn around Well you don't muck around Do you have someone in mind Especially lesbians They don't muck around

They don't muck around She'll be moving in by Monday Oh yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah

Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah

Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah

Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Look My father-in-law Has been watching These movies for years Do you remember His DVD collection That time I showed you

My father-in-law Is Thai He's from Thailand He would go home To Thailand And bring back A suitcase full of the shittest DVD movies you would never... Yeah, and nunchucks. Velocipasta was one.

Velocipasta. A pastor, like a church leader, somehow became a velociraptor in a certain condition. Yeah. Oh my God. Velocipasta. And he'd eat all the people that didn't believe in Jesus? Something like that. Yeah, okay.

So the Velocipasta, 2018, after losing his parents, a priest travels to China where he inherits a mysterious ability that allows him to turn into a dinosaur. Yes. This is incredible. Yeah. He had them all. Sometimes those movies are so ridiculous.

They're good. They're good. Like Sharknado. No, Sharknado. No, Shark... Yeah, the first Sharknado we did, how many did it get up to? Five?

Yeah. I never saw it. Well, Cocaine Bear is absolutely smashing it at the box office in America at the moment. We spoke to your friend who plays...

Alan Henry. Yeah, he plays the bear. He is the bear. Although that's less Sharknado, that movie. That's actually... Got some integrity.

Like, yeah. It's well done. Quite well done. Yeah. But the people that have made Sharknado, that movie. That's actually... Got some integrity. Like, yeah. I think it's well done. Quite well done. Yeah. But the people that have made Sharknado have announced a new movie. Yes. I guess with the excitement of Cocaine Bear at the moment.

To add to their library of classics like Mega Piranha and Titanic 2. Attack of the Meth Gator. Fantastic. All right, this will be set in Florida, surely, right? Similar premise to Cocaine Bear. It finds a big stash of meth. Gets into the meth.

Runs amok. Runs amok in Florida. Kills some people. Yeah. Oh, my God. I'm just looking down. It doesn't look nearly as charming. Yeah, right.

If I might call Cocaine Bear charming. What are the top six other animal drug combinations that would make great movies? Number six on the list, marijuana hyena. Those guys are laughing anyway. Oh, my God. And there'd just be a lot of laughing. Less of a ha-ha-ha, more of a ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

And now they've got rid of Scar. I mean, they're their own bosses now. They can just hang out and have a bit of fun. Blaze in the sun. Number five on the list of the top six animal drug combinations that make great movies. Jurassic Park ketamine. Oh, yeah. Okay.

All the dinosaurs are on ketamine. A little bit more of a chilled experience. Yeah, okay. I watched a TikTok live last night of some guy in Britain snorting ketamine. Oh. What? You're so addicted. I saw it too.

The ketamine guy, the guy on TikTok Live, he was sniffing ketamine. Look, it looks suspicious. Why are you guys watching this? I was just flicking through TikTok Lives. I love flicking through TikTok Lives and being like, why are you on Live? You're trash.

Couldn't you spend your time watching something more wholesome? Like maths. Like maths. Like Married at First Sight, the latest season. You are loving it. Yeah, I didn't have time to be on TikTokolesome like Hayley like maths like Married at First Sight the latest season you are loving it yeah I didn't have time to be on TikTok live I was watching maths damn

and you're watching people doing ketamine in Britain ketamine's such a trash trash drug the thing about maths is all drugs are bad Hayley

all drugs are trash I know they're all bad but that one's got a real trashy vibe yeah play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. This is a shame, really.

Shout out to our ketamine listeners, but just, you know what I mean, like. But do better. It's a bit trash. If you just want to try harder and, I don't know, give them. Have some respect. Yeah, have some respect for your nostrils.

Gosh. Yeah, this guy on the TikTok, I was just like, what? And his eyes were like, wow, wow. And everyone's just like, dude, what are you doing? Vaughan literally sends five messages a day to our group chat with links to Facebook,

to TikTok lives. I was in a TikTok live the other day and it was just trash city. And I was like, the guys have got to see this. And I clicked share, unbeknownst to me, it pops up in the comments, being like, Vaughn has copied the link. And this girl is like, Vaughn, where are you sharing this to? And I was like, ah! And I swear to God, I ran out of the TikTok live.

But it just makes me, it shouldn't, and I know that sounds like elitist and horrible and bad, but I watch it sometimes and I'm like, ah! But it's why anyone watches reality TV. It's my Tinder. It's your Tinder. Right. I'm better than you. Yeah. You wish. Yeah, right. You wish you'd get my eyes. And then doipe. Right. I'm better than you. Yeah. You wish.

Yeah, yeah, right. You wish you'd get my eyes. And then do you get sad when they're better than you? I get sad when I run out. Okay. Anyway, where was I up to? That's right. Number four on the list of the top six animal drug combinations that would make great movies.

Vika and Vultures. Jeepers. Just because they just like plummet out of the sky. Yeah. And vultures It's just scary Number three on the list Of the top six animal drug combinations That would make great movies

Anteaterphetamine Anteaterphetamine An anteater that's on methamphetamine Wow And he's just like Like just rails He's got no symptoms No rails of ants It happens Because the ants Carry all the meth And he's just like, just rails. He's got no sense of the law.

It happens because the ants carry all the meth back into their thing and then he's in there just like, tongue in the mouth. If they were on methamphetamine, you'd just see whole pieces of food go past carried by one ant. Yeah. You'd imagine they had to have superhuman, super ant strength. Yeah. For a short time. Yeah. And then they'd feel so anxious the next day. And then he's

eating them and getting it all as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a horrible cycle. Number two on the list. You think Paul Rudd would be up to play that? Yeah. I think so. Like a darker side of Ant-Man? A darker side of Ant-Man. Maybe he was the one to put it in there. Number six on the top. No, number one. Number two. Oh, Han hon Have you had a stroke?

No, I got excited Because the next one's MDMA And it made me think of MAFS My favourite song Number two on the list Of the top six animal drug combinations That were in movies

MDMA Anaconda Oh, okay Oh, yeah Yeah Because it had an anaconda What was the anaconda movie? That was just anaconda Anaconda

It was just Jennifer. It would be grinding its fangs down. But it has no hands to touch things and see what they feel like. So it's just wriggling on the ground. Wriggling on people's woolen sweaters. Being like, what is this made of? While it's strangling them. I must say, as I'm squeezing the life out of you, your fur is so soft.

I think, like, we've made a connection and I love you. Oh, my God. What have I said? Did I make a fool of myself? Can I get a glass of water? And number one on the list of the top six animal drug combinations that would make great movies, just a really, really drunk elephant. Yeah.

Just a really boozed elephant. Remember when those elephants got into, they were eating fermented something. Yeah. Just a really boozed elephant. Remember when those elephants got into, they were eating fermented something. Yes. And then they were just like stumbling through a village and they were just like

through, people were like, ah, coming through their little huts and houses. And then they were like leaning against power poles and then they had to roll around

in a field. That's good stuff. That is today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Now, if you're thinking of applying for the next season of maths, you're going to need some flirtation techniques. Yes.

Now, there is a new study that has been published in the Evolutionary Psychology Journal that has found the number one most effective way to flirt. What do you think it is? Squeezing your tits. Squeezing. Give them a little taste. Give him a little taste. Give him a little taste of the after game.

Is this imagining you're on like a first date? So if you're on a first date and you're trying to get your flirt on, maybe you're at a bar and you're trying to pick someone up. Is it a sexy look? Oh, a little wink. Is it a wink perhaps? Did that work on you when I just... Did you not hear my pants hit the ground?

Yeah, yeah. That was them. Yeah, okay, great. I know, it is make me laugh. It's a sense of humour. Oh, but that's a very subjective thing. Yeah, it is. Well, it does depend on the type of comedy.

And just take it easy. Yeah. Don't go like extreme gag. A tight five. Yeah, you don't do a tight five to kick off the entrees, you know. So they used as an example Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Great film.

Disney classic. I mean, there's been funny movies since. I wonder if they could have done something a little bit more modern. Nope, 1988. Last funny film. Bob Hoskin. Bob Hoskin in a lead man role.

That's right. Remember, Roger is a frantic, anxious rabbit with a penchant for mischief. Whereas Jessica is a voluptuous vixen. Not even a rabbit. They call her Jessica Rabbit, but...

No, she's not a rabbit. She's not a rabbit. Roger's a rabbit. Yeah, Roger Rabbit, but wasn't she Jessica Rabbit? She's a human being. Yeah. Yeah, because she married

Roger Rabbit. She's his wife. She took a surname. She's not a rabbit. Yeah. And then there's a private investigator, Eddie Valiant, says, what do you see in the guy? And she's like,. She took a sooner. She's not a rabbit. Yeah. And then there's private investigator Eddie Valiant says,

what do you see in the guy? And she's like, he makes me laugh. Weird. Why would they use Roger Rabbit as a reference for that? No.

If you're trying to pick up a rabbit in a bar and you're a human woman, all you want is to make them laugh. It's a little laugh. A sense of humour. Yeah.

Now this was only conducted on heterosexual couples, but it isn't Pride Month anymore, so I'm not going to apologise them laugh. It's a little laugh. A sense of humour. Yeah, now this was only conducted on heterosexual couples, but it isn't Pride Month anymore, so I'm not going to apologise for that. But they say for men... If there's some sort of light drizzle today and I see a rainbow, I'm going to be livid. It is no longer Pride Month.

Get out of here. What are you doing here? You're misappropriating the month. Get out of here. So for men, if they show off their sense of humour, it is found to be the most effective way to flirt whether they're

looking for short or long term. However, for women, being funny is the most effective tactic when looking for a long term relationship. Right.

But if you're just looking for a shag, enough with the gags. Does it say, like you say in a bar or you're around them, what does it say online? Because do you think

a lot of that's taken away now with online? No, because you've always got to start with a little charming quip. Something like that. And apparently humour is effective for both, well, for female and males, regardless of their attractiveness, regardless of their age, religious preferences, whether they're extroverted or introverted,

their attractiveness, or whether they're lookingroverted or introverted, their attractiveness, or whether they're looking for short-term or long-term. Right. It's a little joke. That shouldn't be news to anybody because look at comedians and they've got hot wives. John Mulaney. Such hot wives.

John Mulaney's a very funny man, but he's not like winning any model contests. Who's the guy who yells, I don't want to, blah, blah, blah, blah. He's got like a gorgeous wife. Oh, middle-aged white dude. Who's the guy that yells Middle aged white guy

You're not narrowing it down anymore Meta that owns Facebook Instagram WhatsApp Is teaming up With a company That specialises

In trying to remove things From the internet And they're going to develop Work together to develop this. So if you're nudes that you in the heat of the moment sent to a loved one and then that all fell

apart in an act of revenge, they put it somewhere or shared it to other people. Which is illegal now. Which is illegal. Take It Down is a service actually developed in the US by the National Centre for Missing and Exploited Children and it will

scour through Meta's properties, find the photo and erase its existence. Fantastic. Just gone. Would that work for things that aren't Meta Facebook? Like if it was on a dodgy website? Like if your ex had uploaded a video? things that aren't meta, Facebook, like if it was on a dodgy website,

like if your ex had uploaded a video. It was on NZ Herald. Made its way to the NZ Herald. No, I mean if it was like revenge porn. Yeah, like on a porn website or one of those websites. So Take It Down has an algorithm that matches your images with ones it finds online, like a reverse image search. Wait, so you have to give them...

You have to upload your nude, the one that's been leaked. Hang on, how do we know this is legitimate? Or are they just wanting all of our nudes? Through its algorithm, it creates a code, scans websites for that code, Facebook, Instagram, et cetera, as well as Pornhub and other sites that have signed up to be part of it and deletes the content which matches yours. That's great technology.

What if you have sent these nudes like 10, 15 years ago and you don't have the main image anymore? But then you would get it from wherever it is and be like, this is me. Oh, right. So if you knew it was on the internet. Yeah, because that's the thing. Someone said, what if it's cropped?

And they said, yeah, but just grab the cropped one and be like, this is the problem. That's fantastic. That's great. So you couldn't just go in and be like, this is the problem. It's fantastic. That's great. So you couldn't just go in and be like, hey, can you check that there aren't any nudes of me? Because I just did a quick Google search, Haley Sproul nudes. Nothing. Nothing.

You've got a safe search on though. Yeah. Oh, bugger. I'll do it. Also, deep fakes. Yeah. Which is going to become a big problem, isn't it? Yeah.

So this kind of, I saw this yesterday. And then also yesterday, I've been watching a show. I have been skipping maths. I want to binge it. You've got to catch up because tonight's episode is going to be insane. You've been deep into it, haven't you? Deep in maths. Now, I have been watching a program called Fleischmann's in Trouble.

Yes. On Disney Plus. On their Stars part of Disney Plus. Because it's not like animated cute stuff. I thought it started out as like this it was going to be like this New York based comedy about a guy in his 40s who's going through a divorce but it's actually like this very, very

confronting, especially if you're like around 40, this confronting situation about how different people deal with middle age. But he's got a daughter, relatively the same age as my daughter in the show, but he's got a daughter relatively the same age as my daughter in the show. And she's just been involved in like a nude, like she was like, I know. And I'm just like, this is insane.

So young. And she sent it to a boy when they were on camp and he sent it around all of his friends and like now she's like depressed and stuff. Yeah. And I was like at the gym watching this and I was like, I had this, I've got to go get them. I've got to go get them from school. I've got to protect my children.

We move. Today's the day we move to the bush. Today's the day we disappear from society. But I went home and when they got home from school, had a calm and balanced chat to them. That's so cool. About how things that happen in the heat of the moment can stay with you forever, especially now that the internet exists. Yeah.

I said, and I did bring up the fact that recently my high school girlfriend got in touch and said, these are some of the letters you wrote. And I was just like, and it made me cringe and feel so awkward. I said, but that's pretty much as bad as it got. Yeah. Before the internet. You couldn't send that on a Nokia 3310.

Absolutely not. It's so cool that you... You'd go bracket, space, space, full stop, space, space, bracket, and then do that again. Space, space. You've got wide boobs. Yeah, I was. They were bigger.

They looked bigger. Wow. And you'd send that. That was about as... Yeah. Or eight, equal sign, equal sign, equal sign, capital D. How did they take this chat? Pretty well.

I was like, this is, I said, this won't be the last time we have these sorts of chats. No. I said, I don't want anyone

to feel awkward or anything, but I just want you to know that it might seem like the best way to impress a boy at that moment. Yeah. But if it all falls apart,

I said, the same thing could happen if you send it to, you know what girls are like, especially at that age, it. But if it all falls apart. I said the same thing could happen if you send it to, you know what girls are like, especially at that age. It's all so tumultuous. Hell yeah. I was like,

if you could send it and then your friendship falls apart and they show their friends and then they send it on to people. Yeah. And they're just doing it because they're also like dealing with this hormonal brain

that's making like snap decisions. Oh my God. It's a wild time. You also hope that, I think it's awesome you have this conversation, especially early, because it's all happening earlier these days. But like, you also hope

that the other conversation is happening. Because sometimes like, girls or women take photos of their bodies, they feel really empowered by it. Totally. They're feeling hot and they send it. The conversation should also be like, if you do receive a photo like this,

don't share it. Absolutely. You hope that both of those conversations are happening at the same time. That's totally, and I said to them, if you get sent this and then you send it on,

you're distributing illegal activity. You'll be in big trouble. I said there's a Digital Harms Communication Act, but you're also sending around photos of a kid. Also, it'll confiscate your iPad. Yeah, and I will flick the Wi-Fi off and it will not be flicked back on. And we are moving to the bush. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Play ZM. Well, we're minutes away from Vaughn not being able to control himself. Oh, I know. Two idols. The new season of Mandalorian is out today on Disney+. Jon Favreau. Well, it starts today, yeah. I reckon you've got to unhook the eyebrows from the cat.

It's a little strange. I recognise Jon. I've got my hat around. I can feel it's pulling my face. Jon Favreau I recognise. The other guy. Do you know the other guy? No, you're probably not in the Dave Filoni wheelhouse.

I'm not. A lot of Star Wars. He worked on Avatar The Last Airbender, which is one of the greatest eight-minute series of all time. All I know is I told Aaron who we're interviewing and he fell off the bed, so. Really? He's excited.

Okay, well that interview. He asked if he could come to work today and I said it was a bit much. Wow, we're going to deal with one. Imagine that. Excited me and Aaron's in the background like sticking his head around me like, hi, hi.

Hi there, hi there, hi there. I said no. Interview coming up in about 10 minutes. This is an unreal story. background like sticking his head around me like Hi there, hi there, hi there. Interview coming up in about 10 minutes. This is an unreal story. This is unreal. So there was a family in China. Yunnan. I don't know where that is. China's a big place. Does China have

its own series of maths? Married at first sight China. Hang on. China. I on. China. I have to say the New Zealand one's the worst version. How embarrassing. That was terrible. The New Zealand version of what?

Maths. No, the only news about it is last year when there was a Chinese contestant. She suffered terrible racism towards her. Oh, goodness. Indeed. Anyway, so there is a family in China and the mother brought home a,

what are they called? There's big bears, like a Tibetan mastiff. Tibetan mastiff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're like big and hairy and all this. And they raised this dog for two years until someone looked at it and was like, that's not a mastiff, man.

That doesn't look right. No, this didn't happen. It's a bear. Is this an old story? It always like, that's not a mastiff, man. That doesn't look right. No, this didn't happen. It's a bear. Is this an old story? It always pops up. It's a bear. They had a dog for two years and found out it's a bear. Excuse me.

I got the story of Ladd Bible. What? The Bible of Ladds. Of Ladds. Must be right. It was a bear. Read from Chad415. A family raised a bear because they thought it was a dog.

No. And this isn't new. It's old and I always think this is just made up. You're a party pooper. I'm sorry to be the cynical one. You did this to me last week. What was I trying to tell you? Last week you tried to tell us that the bride bastard

who I groomed to be. What proof do you have that this didn't happen? What proof do you have that it did happen? Ladbible.com. You've got to stop reading Ladbible. This story is 2018. Nationalgeographicpeople.com reported it. ZNM for all your hottest, freshest news.

But I can't find anything. It's horseplay. Yeah, it's horseplay. It's nonsense. It's not. It didn't happen. It's a bear. A bear.

They look like the same animal. They don't look like the same thing. They've got a snout and they're furry and black and brown. Have you ever seen a bear? Like, Tabish and Mastiff is not a bear. This is another one of that didn't happen. Do you know what didn't happen? The Star Wars world.

That's all BS as well. Oh. It's all make-believe. But we know it's fiction. How do we know? It's enjoyable fiction. How do we know? There's no proof.

This could be a new segment, though. This didn't happen. That didn't happen. That didn't happen. And you bring a story. And we say that didn't happen. Farcical. I thought you were going to say so far.

I was like, wow. F-ing stupid. So stupid. That didn't happen. That didn't happen. I just like to give people the benefit of the doubt. The benefit of the doubt. You'll be paid for a fool every time.

All right. Like the story last week. That didn't happen. The story last week of the guy'll be paid for a fool every time. All right. Like the story last week. That didn't happen. The story last week of the guy that caught his fiancee breastfeeding. That's right. No, that's what we said. She caught the guy breastfeeding. That was that.

Imagine that. That didn't happen. Imagine that. It didn't happen. Imagine that. It really ruined a wedding day. It wouldn't. If it actually happened.

Your husband debased on the teeth of his old mother. It's a lie made up by a podcast that was trying to get people to talk about them. Well, this is going to get people talking about our podcast. There was a family in China that raised a bear as a dog for two years. Mandalorian is out today. Big interview next. Cannot wait. Jon Favreau, Dave Filoni, writers, directors, legends of the Star Wars universe.

Okay, stop. You stop talking now. Lightsabers at the ready. That was enough. Lightsabers at the ready. You are not allowed to bring up lightsabers. Roger, roger. Roger, roger.

What is this news? Play. ZDM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Well, forget Married at First Sight because it's out today. The Mandalorian Season 3 on Disney. Our people are scattered like stars in the galaxy. What are we? What do we stand for?

Being a Mandalorian is not just learning about how to fight. You also have to know how to navigate the galaxy. Well, they are here. I can see them. Jon Favreau, Dave Filoni. Vaughn, stop pacing the room. He's very excited. These guys have been teasing me because I'm very, very excited to be speaking to you.

I am a Dave Filoni animated Star Wars fan from way back. Thank you so much. I saw Katana was my favorite Jedi. I'm just going to get that out there right now. Here we go. He's been so scrambled. You were like. He's wearing the shirt.

Yeah. He was like, should I sit? Should I stand? Do I speak? What do I do? We're just going to pass it over to Vaughn, I think. We're on limited time. I've got questions that need to be answered.

Let's go. Speed round. Is season three of The Mandalorian going to have as big a reveal as the reveals that were Grogu, The Return of Boba Fett, or Luke in season three? That would be a big reveal itself. I don't know if you could go bigger than that. Those were pretty, those were pretty,

now people are expecting things. So it's, they're kind of laying in the weeds, waiting to see what we do. But we like to have surprises every week. We like to have something unexpected happen because we love the conversation. We love people like you who have some thoughts about what's going to come and then show,

and then sometimes live up to them and sometimes maybe make a slightly different choice. But we love the conversation. This weekly release of it allows for a lot of conversation to shake out over that week and then hopefully building to a season ender that pays off all of people's expectations. Yeah, I'm just going to take the clippy answer where you said, I love people like you.

I know, yeah, yeah. That's in the bank. That just happened. Now, New Zealand, we had Taika Waititi as our connection to season one, Uncle Tim in season two. Does New Zealand get a connection in season three? That's a good question. Are we plucking in any straws of any New Zealanders?

But we can't, like anything, we can't answer that question because if we answer that question, that's actually giving information and saying, well, who's in it and who's not. So it's a very clever... We can't talk about... The Peter Jackson cameo. I can't...

I won't even confirm anything. I've been around too long. It sounds like we've got to get PJ in there at some point to live up to our... You never know. Always in motion is the future. And Vaughn, maybe even season four, because Vaughn does a lot of characters, don't you? I do a lot of characters.

I'll be anything. I'll pay for my own flights. I'm not a part of a union or anything. You smash me, hit me if you want. No, the rules don't apply to me. I'll be there. I'll be there. Now, it's impossibly hard to imagine if it wasn't Pedro Pascal.

But if it wasn't, who would it be? Like, he's so good. I say this about every role that Pedro plays. You're going to think I'm just saying this because you're asking, but I think you would have been. Oh, my God. There we go. John, you're stuffed up there because he's never going to let this go. We will not hear you. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. There we go. No, John, you're stuffed up there because he's never going to let this go.

We will not hit him. Oh, my God. You just ruined those two's week that this guy said. Yeah. Thank you. You can tell by the look on their face what you just said is going to be the conversation for the next month. It's going to be the bumper every time they come back from commercial.

That's fine. You know, I came to Celebration last year. Oh, good. And at Disneyland, I bought the Darksaber. I bought a lot of lightsabers, and my wife was so angry at the amount of money I spent on lightsabers. But now that I'm the Mandalorian, I rightfully own the Darksaber. You needed one. You needed one.

No one can take it away from me. Are you willing to take responsibility for making Pedro Pascal the Internet's biggest daddy? He is a daddy. Yes, he's the dad of the year, father of the year between the two shows. Amazing. Yeah, he's great.

He's good. He's very protective over the little ones, which is good. Yeah, no, he's been wonderful. He has been kicking around for so long and now all of a sudden

he's like this overnight success after working for decades in the business. I know, I know. He's been doing, I mean, you think of Game of Thrones and Narcos. That's just the beginning of it. No, he's having a moment and, you know,

it's great to see him being recognized for all the work he's been doing. Now, deep Star Wars question. I'm sorry, that's all the time we're going to have. Oh, my God. Oh, no. Answer one more. Let's answer Dave. Let's hear it.

Just real quick. How do you decide, like, with the lore, you included, like, things like the N1 Starfighter, the Mandalorian new ship, which people, deep Star Wars fans would know from, like, the prequels, and then you, like, pop in a droid that was in, like, the background shot of the original trilogy or, like, a background cult character.

How do you decide which ones you're going to use? Well, we, you know, our big thing is to make sure that even new Star Wars fans are welcome here. Like if you've never seen anything, hopefully you're able to enjoy the show. And no matter what your favorite Star Wars is, we want to have something for you. So if you've been watching Star Wars since you're 10,

like me, and you're seeing it since the original film came out, or somebody came up with the Clone Wars, like we want to make sure that you know that we're into all of it's being acknowledged here. But that should be just part of the fabric and the background of it. So if you know what the ice cream maker is from Willow Hood, you'll appreciate what the Camtono is. But if you don't know what it is, it doesn't interfere.

It doesn't demand that level of knowledge. But we want to reward people who read all the books and all the comics and all the guides. We have things that were toys that were never in the show that we made in real life, like Bib Fortuna's staff and the transport that carried the end of season one, right? The transport that carried all the stormtroopers. Those are things that were never in real life but only existed as toys. So, you know, that's part of the fun here is to just breathe life into it and bring all Star Wars fans together.

John, Dave, you have made this man's life today. I've just had the best five minutes with you guys. The show hasn't even out yet. Hope you like it. I don't care. I don't care. I have Star Wars pumping straight into my veins. I just love it so much.

Thank you so much. Thank you so much, guys. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Now, this is a news story you've found because you love Bali. I love Bali. And I fondly remember when Daz and Tiff went on their honeymoon from Married at First Sight, season two. Daz and Tiff, tumultuous couple.

They broke up soon after. Yeah. But that Bali honeymoon looked beautiful. And I've been to Bali. It was gorgeous. What season of Married at First Sight was this? Season two. Might have to re-watch.

You've got to go, if you're running out of episodes for season 10 because you're all caught up like I am. Go back, go back, go back, go back, go back, go back. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Keep coming, keep coming. Yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Stop, stop, stop. Don't do season one.

Well, this is your barley warning. It's to double check the prices on menu items. If something seems too good to be true, it might be worth asking the question. I would say this is a warning for wherever you travel. Especially in Europe. Restaurants are really bad at scamming tourists. Yeah, but genuinely and generally in Bali and January,

in Bali things are almost too good to be true. Yes. You go have the fanciest meal in Bali. Tell you what, I had some good food when I was there last year. It will cost you the same as like a very average meal in New Zealand. Yeah. That's what we got. The buckets, the Thailand buckets when you're on the beach

and you're having a party and you're getting a little bucket and you're like, oh, yeah, I'll have the... Bucket of mojitos. I've always got a weird name. Yeah. Big Gay Steve. Yeah. I'll have a Big Gay Steve.

You bet. And then they turn around and Big Gay Steve's supposed to be chocolate with Karuba. Yeah. But you've got to see them open the Karuba and pour it. Oh, you're getting a second rate wrong. Because they have the stickers over the bottle lids. Yeah. So you've got to get a legit liquor. Yeah. Otherwise you're drinking, you're getting a second rate wrong. Because they have the stickers over the bottle lids. Yeah. So you've got to get a legit

liquor. Yeah. Otherwise you're drinking ethanol and you'll wake up blind. Yeah, which has happened to tourists. Oh man, we had heaps of Arak in Bali. Arak is Bali's bad alcohol. You're better than that.

Yeah, I know. It's good though. You're rolling the dice here. Absolutely. Cuts you in half. So what happened was this wasn't a big guy Steve in a bucket. This was a bottle of, what is it called? Domaine Le Flava Chevalier Moncher. Champagne. Right.

Straight from champagne. Whoa. Legit. This isn't Bubbly's. Okay okay. Straight from champagne. Whoa. Legit. Wow. This isn't Bubblies. Okay. This is legit champagne. Now, it said $170 Australian dollars. Well, for a big occasion, though.

Why not? Like if it was your honeymoon or something. Yeah, for sure. And then apparently the waiter said, are you sure, sir? And he said, yeah, absolutely. Like, no worries. Of course. How dare you?

What do I look, poor? How dare you? I've just come straight from the mines of Perth. Yeah, no worries, of course. How dare you? What do I look poor? How dare you? I've just come straight from the mines of Perth. Yeah, I'm cashed up. Yeah, I'm making so much money. I can do whatever I want. Yeah, I'll die young, but boy, am I rich. Then paid the bill at the end of the night.

Didn't check the bill. The next morning, checks the bank account. That dinner cost over $2,000. Jeepers! Was it $1,700? $1,700. Oh, no. Not $1 cost over $2,000. Jeep! Was it $1,700? $1,700. Oh, no. Not $170.

$1,700. I would never buy a bottle of wine that's even over $100, let alone $1,700. Now, I'm just having a look to buy in New Zealand. Yeah, it is $1,800. What? To buy in New Zealand, this wine. This is a very, very... See, give me my

$16 on special Bottle of Prosecco Any day Over that No you've got a Bloody bargain On winesearcher.com In New Zealand dollars

It's $2,960 For a 750ml But do you think That was on purpose Leaving a zero off Because consumer I mean I don't know What consumer law

Is like in Bali But if that happened In New Zealand That's the advertised price. That's what you're paying. Yeah. If it was 170. I've also seen overseas where it'll have the numbers written down,

like the price, but the comma will be in the wrong place. Oh, yeah. It'll say 170,0. Yeah. Rather than 1,700. Oh, yeah, and sometimes they put commas instead of decimal points. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's always worth a double check.

Yeah. A double check on that one. Or maybe just don't buy champagne and barley. Stupidly expensive bottles of champagne. Yeah. But these kind of scams happen all the time. Like Europe's pretty bad for them

where like they'll charge $200 for a bottle of water, sparkling water or some sandwich. You'd hope that was Sam Pellegrino. Even if it was. This guy didn't think he scammed. He just thought it was

a typo on the menu because the guy did say to him, are you sure, sir? Yeah, right. Like, did double check and he scoffed at him. Have you got the money, sir? And then he didn't check

his bill when he left. He only found out the next day, always check your bill when you leave. Always check, always check. Run the finger down it. But then what are you going to do?

Give it back to them? So that's $2,000. Yeah. That's how much the whole bloody... Well, that's what he said it cost more than a holiday. Is he good for it?

Did he pay it? Did he just lump it and live with it? I think he's getting the value out of retelling the yarn. I have found one for $1,700 online.

Well, it's not a competition. Let's go Glingaris. Glingaris Ross Glingaris. Are you 18? Sure am. I've been snaked. Bloody hell. I've been snaked by the gays.

And I'm livid about it. I'm livid. After endless unquestionable, unquestioning support. Lesbians, off the hook. Yeah. You're off the hook. Okay, right. You're still.

The buys? Buys. As long as they're not guys. Are okay by me. Okay. That sounded weird. Keep that in mind for the context of the story. Right.

Because you've been hurt by men. I've been hurt by the homosexuals. And you've been hurt by homosexual men. I've been betrayed. Yep. Give me some context. What's happened? I'll tell you what.

Well, Hayley Sproul, it is time that you know in an effort to support your side quests in the arts, we will be travelling to the New Plymouth Arts Festival. Is that what it's called? The Taranaki Arts Festival. The Taranaki Arts Festival. The Taranaki Arts Festival. I do apologise. Keldon, New Plymouth. Because you have, this is at the end of June,

you have a show. One-off show. Yet to be announced. Yet to be announced. And tickets will go on sale. Am I allowed to announce it? While it's happening. Well, what happened yesterday,

it wasn't the Taranaki Arts Festival, it was the Taranaki Drama Festival. More was the Taranaki Drama Festival. More drama than your average episode of Married Apps. First sight. So, you're, and this is also the time where we tell you we're not doing the road trip down that you posted because none of us people are driving. Oh, my God.

We're flying. No, the road trip was going to be flying. We're flying. I'm not driving that road. You're driving because you've got to take a piano and a big boy. I do have to take a piano and a big boy. And a big boy. So, we decided we're going to be fun. We're flying. We're flying. I'm not driving that road. You're driving because you've got to take a piano and a big boy. I do have to take a piano and a big boy. And a big boy. So we decided we're going to fly down.

Also, by the way, I said to Sade, Vaughan's wife, because whenever we take Vaughan somewhere as a group, you just have to organise it with his wife. I've got a work wife and my life wife. Yeah. And Sade messages me out of the blue after saying, yeah, we'd love to come down. I said, yeah, we're going to drive down after the show.

And she's like, hey, what are flights like? You lazy turds. Great question. It's a beautiful drive to New Plymouth. It's just long. No, it's stunning though. The distance. That's why we can get a little drunk on the way there.

Have a few drinks on the way there. Yeah. Without, you know, feeling sorry for the driver. Well, now I'm going to feel like I'm left out in my dumb car. Yeah, you're in a dumb car. Here's what happens. Sade is in... Because this is also your birthday celebration.

Let's not brush over the fact this is also, like, your birthday weekend. Well, it's how it came about because I said, oh, it's on your birthday weekend and I'm performing in your hometown. Why don't you come down? Yeah. And so now it's been open to a whole bunch of our mutual friends. A whole bunch of gays. I've invited so many people.

I've invited our friend Alice and Brad from Christchurch. Fantastic. Come on up. I'm just inviting everybody. Absolutely. Love this. This is why New Plymouth is going to be popping off. They are not prepared. Watch out. Insert bar here. What's that?

I don't know. I don't know which one. The Mill. Last time I was there, I broke it. The Mill. The Mill. That got condemned in Christ. It's a liquor store in Wellington.

The fat lady's arms. Yeah, watch out, grumpy mole. Watch out, shooters. Other bars from the early 2000s. We'll find a bar. So Sade is organising this and I said, well, if we're flying, check that everybody can get on the same flight. And then we can transport to the airport. Yeah.

And then we can transport back. And when we get there as well, we'll just get on a big shuttle. Make sure everybody's on this flight. So Sade's like, okay. And on this flight, everybody, Fletch then sends it out to other people. To the gays. To the gays. Send it to the gays. To the gays. Send it to the gays.

To the gays. To the gay friends. The gays snake the seats on the plane. What about sneaks on the snakes on the plane? What do you mean? What about sneaky gays? We had the seats ready to be like, bye, but I said to Sade, we'll make sure everybody can get on this flight,

waiting for them to be like, yeah, there's seats, and yes, I'm available for that time. Bye. These sneaky gays went in and bought the seats, so then when Sade clicked yes, it was like, these seats are no longer available. And we went back, we're now paying more. Wait.

Like $45 each. But the gays didn't buy you a flight. No, the gays didn't buy me a flight. We were all buying our own individual flights, but we had them reserve. They were very cheap flights. Yeah, the gays didn't buy me a flight. We were all buying our own individual flights, but we had them reserved. They were very cheap flights. Yeah, the gays got the cheap ones, and then Vaughan and Shana had to pay $45 each more.

Each way, each person. $90. That's nearly $200. $90 back. The gays have cost me $190. They're going to owe you a lot of drinks. This was a, are we all all right to go on this flight check? Fast walking gays.

Straight in there. On the internet. New tab. We travel and book things aggressively and quick because we don't have children to think about. But they do. These are the same gays that Pink announced at a concert and then I just get a message saying, I got you a ticket. And I was like, I didn't even know if I wanted to go. Yeah, they got you a ticket.

Yeah, I know, it's beautiful. They did the same with Florence and the Machine. They weren't looking after the heteronormative couple with children when it came to booking flights. No. They were all just, hmm, Pride Month, they said. Pride Month, it's our month. Well, French, we owe you a thank you

because you're coming down, one, to support your friend as he grows old, and two, to support your other friend as she lives her dreams as a comedian. And it's costing me a fortune. Also, the tickets to my dreams as a comedian. And it's costing me a fortune. Also, the tickets to my show are $59. And it's the gays' fault. Yeah.

I'm livid. I know you are. Wow. But you did mess around. We didn't mess around, Bo. I think it was literally 15 minutes where those flights went up. Do these flights suit everybody? I'm imagining there's like 20 seats on the plane at that price,

but then when it gets, because of supply and demand, you end up paying more and they snuck in and got the cheap seats and now I'm paying more to go there. Here's how we're going to remedy this. Because I was a considerate heterosexual in Pride Month and I said, does this suit, does this, hello, homosexuals. This is your platform. I dare not speak on your behalf.

Here's how we're going to combat it. I just looked at my contract before and I get two complimentary tickets. Now the tickets are $59. It's rounded up to 60 for maths. $120 for you and Shada to attend the show. Maths or maths? Oh, sorry.

I said math-a-ser with a T-H. Not maths. But we can talk about that later. That's my favourite one. $120 I'll save you by giving you my comps and make the gays pay. Make the gays pay. Make the gays pay. You're going to'll save you by giving you my comps and make the gays pay. Make the gays pay. Make the gays pay.

You're going to make the gays pay. The mighty pink dollar has just been its match. The head troops are getting comp tickets. But then Vaughan and Sade won't be able to sit with the big group of people, including the gays. They don't want to sit with you anymore. I don't want to see them all weekend. Wow.

Okay. Did you book accommodation with everyone? Or are you getting snaked there as well? I'm already going to get them all weekend. Wow. Okay. Did you book accommodation with everyone? Or are you getting snake there as well? We're going to get snake there as well. You're going to have to get the twin room with the two single beds. That's all right. We'll push them together. One big bed.

One big bed. One big bed. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. As the plane that loads from the back, don't go 1A, 1B. Okay, hang on. Well, ifch Vaughan and Hayley. Is the plane that loads from the back? Don't go 1A, 1B. Okay, hang on. Well, if you've just joined us,

there's a big weekend in New Plymouth coming up. Do they have exit row in these? It's in June. I meant June's going to be here. Well, if you know it. Hello, it's March. I'm here. I know it's the first of March today.

Do they have exit row for long legs on a tiny plane? No. Okay. But it loads from the back, so you don't want to be stuck right at the front. Okay. Hang on, I am going to do this, but I just need to make sure.

What is the leg-est seat on an ATR? Yeah, review and pay. Sorry, you're just going to have to wait. I don't want to miss this. Okay. I would like to issue a formal apology before I ranted. I included all the gays. You said the gays had snaked you on the cheap flights.

I've been snaked by the gays. Yeah. Now, I've had some messages. Okay. From self-considered, considerate gays. Okay. They're like, we would never have done that to you, regardless of your sexual orientation.

You would have waited until you'd booked and then booked. Yes, and they said, and we're gays and we have children. Of course, I said the gays don't have children. Now, that was specifically indicative of the ones that snaked me yesterday. Got snaked, didn't you? And maybe, you know what? I shouldn't tar everybody with the same brush. No.

And I think I'm learning and growing. You are. And that makes us all better people. So apologies to considerate gays. Snakey gays, you're still on my radar. And collectively, if we could do a whip around, I think it was about $180 they put me out. I don't know if there's some sort of gay fund I can dip into for that

to get that back. I don't know. There's some sort of gay fund I can dip into for that to get that back. I don't know. There's lots of gay funds, but it's not for that. It's not for that. Hey, guys, my flights are booked. We're good now. Okay, you're booked. There is a guy whose shirt on TikTok has been hailed a genius

yet simple tactic, I guess, little hack, to find out if you can expose your partner for cheating. Now, this is a wild, like, I don't know how anybody can go through with this. Yeah.

You'd have to be a good actor. So what he does is he says that you, you go and get a little water bottle from say, a Goodwill or a Kmart, something cheap,

doesn't have to be amazing, but it has to be like a reusable that would belong to someone. Like a Frank Green or a Taylor Spool? If you've got a lot of money to burn.

This is a good water bottle. This is a good water bottle. Thank you. Hashtag gifted. I would never pay this much for a water bottle. Anyway, it says, pretend to discover it. So you're in the car now and you put it in your car, this water bottle, chuck it in the back like I do. Or chuck it at your screen

like I've done. And then you get in the car with this person, you pick up this and you go, oh, this is this water bottle, chuck it in the back like I do. Or chuck it at your screen like I've done. Yeah. And then you get in the car with this person, you pick up this and you go, oh, this is your water bottle. And the partner will obviously go, no, that's not my water bottle. And then you say, well, whose water bottle is it? This is the sort of manipulative BS you might expect from an episode of Maths. 100%. Very on par. You can imagine the drama.

You can imagine it. Imagine it. Oh, they tease it before every ad break. Now, they'll either admit that they don't know whose it is and they'll go, like, I don't know whose it is at all, or you'll see them panic and say, oh, no, yeah, that is mine. That is my water bottle. Oh, sorry, that is mine.

If they're guilty and they've been cheating, they'll be like, uh-oh. Yeah, and they'll probably cover for the water bottle, how it got there. Yeah. But then you'd have to assume if they were cheating that they were picking up the person in the car, right? Wouldn't you be better to do that at the house?

In the bed. In the bedroom. Whose water bottle is this? Whose water bottle is this in the bed? In the middle of the bed. I can feel it. Yeah. Under my legs. Don't do this.

This is insane. This is insane. I know somebody that said to her boyfriend when she thought he was cheating, I've got an STI. How did I get this? Who have you been sleeping with? Oh my God. And they said, oh my God, I'm so sorry.

No, they said, I haven't been sleeping with anyone. I think she was wrong. Oh, now he thinks she's been sleeping with someone. And then she's like, no, no, I'm so sorry. No, they said, I haven't been sleeping with anyone. I think she was wrong. Oh, now he thinks she's been sleeping with someone. And then she's like, no, no, I was just testing you. But I did use a public toilet. Yeah. That classic. I got it from the Westfield toilet seat.

How do you get chlamydia? Well, I went to the Lose the other day, so it would have come off the toilet seat. It must have been there. Into my genital. How do you, and then follow up with a, maybe I sit on toilet seats wrong. How do you sit on the toilet? And then they're like smearing it

all over the toilet seat. Yeah, I use the toilet seat to wipe my genitals. Yeah, they've taken it too far. Because I'm trying not to use toilet paper. But that's also very not recommended. No. I suggest if you think your partner's cheating, hey ask him. Yeah. Just give them you think your partner's cheating, hey, ask him. Yeah.

Just give them a little laugh. Honestly, they will lie. No one's ever cheated on me. That you know of. I'm so hot. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day the Dewey Decimal System. Oh, I love this.

In libraries. In libraries. Yeah. Named after Melville Dewey. I thought it was Dewey Lewis. Dewey Lewis and the Dews. Man, someone who was alive in the 80s loved that joke. And they are welcome.

Melville Louie Consonthe Dewey. Consonthe? Melville Dewey. Yeah. Consonthe. Not a great name. Well, here's the thing. I think we cancel, I think we cancel the Dewey system.

Oh, why? Well, on his Wikipedia page, he has quite the controversies. Oh, okay. Subtitles. Controversies. Sexual harassment. Anti-Semitism. Oh, dear.

Yeah, he had a few of them. And his American Library Association medal. So in 2019, the American Library Association voted to remove his name from its top honour, the Melville Dewey medal. Right. Let me tell you what he did. He would have unwelcome hugging, unwelcome touching, certainly unwelcome kissing with female subordinates

and others who worked at the library. What year was this? The 1800s. Right, okay. Wow. When women would apply to work at the library, he opened a school of library economy at Columbia College. He would ask for their bust sizes when they were

applying. What a pest. Was that in case they couldn't get the drawers open? Because they'd get in the way? And removing the microfiche. The boobs might get in the way of the microfiche. Constantly getting in the way. Newspaper displays.

He sounds like a pest He's a real pest He also required a photograph With each female applicant Since you can't polish a pumpkin As he used to famously say Oh my god So the guy that is responsible

For every The way that libraries organise books In every library in the world Correct Is an absolute pest Was a full blownblown pest. A 10-day trip to Alaska in 1905 for the American Library Association, a group which he co-founded.

Oh, he didn't club some seals, did he? No. Oh, for God's sake. He made unwelcome advances on four prominent librarians, and he was asked to step down from active participation in the ALA because of his attitude. Which, by the way, in 1905 was a big... Probably quite a common attitude. Yeah, and that wouldn't have been so common, would it?

No. I wouldn't have thought so. Also, on his racism, he belonged to the Lake Placid Club, which is like a country club, and was instrumental in writing the policy that kept out Jews, blacks, and other races. Wow. Jeepers.

So what do we, if we cancel this Dewey Decimal System, I'm quite a big fan. His name's literally Dewey. Yeah. Dewey. Dewey. Yeah. I'm a big fan of you just have to search the library for your book now.

I can just alphabetical no matter what the category. Yes, yes. So no matter if it's like non-fiction, fiction, or like picture book, design books, it's just alphabetical. Yeah, The History of Architecture by Daryl King, right next to Stephen King. Yes. Oh, you're going to be last alphabetical, last name.

Last name. Last name. Yeah. Or would it be under subject? Oh, look're going to be... Last alphabetical, last name. Or the last name. Yeah. Or would it be under subject? Oh, look, I don't know. Well, they've got to cancel this guy. What an absolute pest. Full-blown pest. Yeah.

Full-blown pest. The sort of guy, you know, if he was around in the modern age, you'd probably see him cast in the next season of bloody Married at First Sight. Oh, I know. More of a pest than Harrison. Am I right, Mavs fans? Was it Harrison this season of Mavs? Oh, God, he's an absolute a-hole. Oh, I know. More of a pest than Harrison. Am I right, Mavs fans? Which is Harrison this season of Mavs. Oh, God, he's an absolute a-hole.

Hot topical reference. Yeah. And a snake. Adam's a snake. Yeah. Harrison's a snake. So today's fact of the day is the guy that invented the Dewey decimal system and it is named after him was a real pest.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. Play ZM. The Kelly fam. Hi, guys. Welcome to our channel. Please subscribe. And this is not the Kelly fam that you would, this isn't the sort of family you would see on Married at First Sight.

It is more of a family of like, they're established, they're married, they've got the kids and everything. Right, right, right. They call them TikTok parents. TikTok parents. TikTok parents. Do they share a lot of like, if your son's being a bastard. No, it's more like just following them around.

Today we were going shopping. Well, I hate that. Timmy wants a slushy cup. My kids are like, will this Timmy get a slushy cup? Where are they going for the slushy cup? Don't you? Because your kids watch a few YouTube families, don't they? I'm sure they're a lovely family,

but the Norris Nuts are this Australian family. The Norris Nuts? I hear all too much about the Norris Nuts. Right. Are they a wacky family, They're actually, the kids are actually

very nice kids. There's no spoiled attitude about it, but I don't need any more family in my house. That's my family. This makes me never

want to have children. Honestly. It makes it close. This makes me never want to have children. Honestly. It makes it close. My uterus just turned to dust. I'm gone. Goodbye. Goodbye. I'm taking the eggs with me.

The Cali fam. Right, now we can go to the pub. Yeah, great. Can I come to the pub? What time are can go to the pub yeah oh great can I come to the pub no what time are you going to the pub no what time are you going to the pub

because I've got school pick up at 3 and then oh Andy's got dance so we need to take her to dance and then she's got to be picked up at like quarter to five oh yeah I could come to the pub for 10 minutes

I could come and grab our drink no you wouldn't be able to have a drink because I've got to drive again and I'm trying to you know this is just like more of a sort of non-children thing. That's pretty quiet.

My kids are pretty quiet. It's more of a child-free way of life. Right, is that okay? Yeah, that's okay. Sure. I'll just drink it up. I'm sure you get heaps

of joy out of the kids. I'm sure it's like super fulfilling and stuff. Oh my God, it is. Sure. I can tell you about it. Totally. I'm all good's like super fulfilling and stuff. Oh my God, it is. Sure. I can tell you about it. Totally. I'm all good.

So much stuff. No, now that sounds like I'm being silly. I love my children and I don't want to go to the pub. And I love not having children because I like going to the pub. We're different people and we live in different lives and that's A-OK. Now let me get back where we can all agree to bash this family online. Do you know they wouldn't match us together on maths? They wouldn't put us together.

Me and you. No, they would. No, they couldn't because I don't want children. You've got children. It wouldn't work. That's why they'd put us together. Can I get a maths thing, please? Thank you.

That's why they'd put you together because they want the drama. Yeah, the drama. Yeah. Two very different sides of life. So this family, if we could all just focus again All of our hatred towards an online family Of course Thank you With children included

We're hating them Well they were involved Okay So the TikTok parents The Kelly fam The dad's like We're going to Disneyland Oh

And it's going to be great But our problem is Our son is a little bit short For some of the rides Oh yeah Leave him behind Leave him behind So what we've done

We've bought him a shoe with a thick sole and now I've found a- Like a club shoe. That, but then that almost gets him there. So I'm going to buy, they call them flip-flops, jandals, cut the things off and glue the jandals to the bottom of the shoe

to boost them up a little bit more. He's going to be tall enough to go on a ride at Disneyland. So all of these are TikTok videos to kind of show the journey to get them to Disneyland. Well, no, that's just their family life. But this particular video is just like, I'll show you how to get your short kids on a ride at Disneyland.

Right. So everybody can enjoy the fun. Yeah. And he does this, puts it out there, doesn't remember that the internet will literally be like, someone's made a mistake. Someone's made a mistake. Yeah.

It's time to tell them they've made a mistake. It's time to scream at them. It's time to make them regret every life decision they've ever made. Quick, everyone, follow me. But last week this happened to me. But don't you want to do it to somebody else? I do. Follow me. It's a you want to do it to somebody else? I do. Follow me!

It's a drop of blood in the ocean. Yeah, and an online lynch mob just set upon this family saying, and rightfully so, it's a safety measure for a reason. The harnesses, you have to be that tall to fill them out or it's like a safety thing. Otherwise your kid slips out underneath and falls to his death. Yeah, it is bad. And then you're swimming Disneyland.

Yeah. But the kid's got Jandles glued to the bottom of his club shoes to try to get that height. So the internet sets upon them. It's a feeding frenzy. I keep imagining him in like those Melby pulp platforms, you know, that everyone was wearing in the 90s. The Spice Girls.

The poor kid like, oh my God. Walking on stilts, dragging the weight of them, dragging them around Disneyland all day. Great quads at the end of it. So anyway, they've deleted all the videos. All the videos are gone. And we were wondering this morning

if you would like to share with us either as a parent your questionable parenting moves or something your parents looking back now that happened when you were a kid that you were like that shouldn't have probably happened. I shouldn't have been. or something your parents, looking back now, that happened when you were a kid that you were like, that shouldn't have probably happened. Yeah. I shouldn't have been.

I mean, there was some loose parenting in the 80s and 90s. Oh, hell yeah. If you go pretty rural, I reckon you'll still find some. What, like when you were driving the ute around and you were eight? No way. Younger than that. My brother was like six when we were first in charge of steering the ute while my granddad fed the hay off the back on a hilly farm. Or like how you used to sit on the front bonnet and drive around for a little bit.

Yeah. Or you'd jump on the back of the ute and sit on the tray and drive into town. Yeah, or the trailer. Yeah. Of course you would. Because then you get to stick your head around the corner and it goes. Yeah. And you open your mouth and it gets full of all the air

and you're like faster grandad faster and he's like absolutely ringing out of Toyota Hilux alright well

0800 DARS at M we want to take your calls now you can text as well 9696 what is some of the more questionable

parenting moves you've either done or been on the receiving end of well the internet has set upon a TikTok family for... Questionable.

Questionable parenting. They glued some extra soles on their kids' feet. Yeah. So that they could get to the height limit of Disneyland rides. So the internet set on them. They've deleted all the videos. They've apologised and said it was a joke.

No, they totally did it. They it was a joke, even though it totally wasn't a joke. No, they totally did it. They totally did it. And we asked if you've ever been involved in any questionable parenting or been on the receiving end of it, and my lord, are we hearing from some people. Oh, there are some great messages through.

I want to run through every single one of them. Okay, hit us with a couple. In South Africa in the 80s, we visited the zoo and my dad reached over the tall fence and put me on the back of a rhino, took a photo, and then reached over and grabbed the rhino again. What? You're the most dangerous animal in the world. They kill so many humans.

I know. Imagine if you put your two-year-old on the back of a rhino, and then as you're taking the photo, the rhino bolts. And you're like, oh. The baby falls off, and the rhino turns around, travels the baby. And you're like, come on, get up. Get up and run for the fence. What are you doing down there?

Come on, you're going to get squashed by the runner. Stop being stupid. Get out of there. We're going to the shop for some piltong. Michelle, what were your parents' questionable parenting? It wasn't so much my parents, although it was probably questionable because they were probably pissed at the time that this was happening. As we all were back then.

On the day after Christmas, obviously Boxing Day, we would go out to my uncle's farm. We had a huge family get-together and it was grubbing time. And my uncle would get the tractor and hosey up a little metal tray to the back of it and would take our kids for a ride through. Fun! So you just, you know, you keep your hands and your feet inside the vehicle at all times. Oh my God, the Thistles.

Yeah, it was hilarious. But he got a job done and the kids were great and the parents were standing there with their double browns on the side going, yeah, boy! We heard from someone else that the tractor bucket is a good one as well. Yeah, that works. That also works. That's still happening. My husband takes our five-year-old for rides in the tractor bucket

and the one-year-old steers the tractor. Yeah, see? Farmers. Wow. I remember going through the – There was always a paddock with long thistles. And we'd go through it and you'd, like, grab – my sister and I would have to team up and grab our brother

and, like, slowly try to push him off. And so he'd be like, ah, out the side and the sisters would be like, smack, smack, smack, smack, smack, smack, smack, smack. Wow. I mean, he could have fallen under the wheel too. No, because you're behind the tractor and it's going forward. Oh, right. Okay.

Michelle, thank you for your call. Keep them coming through. One thing I've learnt working in radio this long is people love ragging on their parents. They do, eh? That's what my mum said. She said, since I started working here, she said, I want to charge you for creating so much content. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's fun. You rag on them and you kind of like try to embarrass them. And listeners do it as well. That's why whenever we talk about your parents, we always hear so many amazing stories. It's lighthearted and most of the time people are like, yeah, I love and respect them, but this was questionable. Now, we want to know your questionable parenting

techniques that you experienced or that you do. A lot of wild stories coming in from the 80s and 90s. Now, someone's on the phone with a wild story. Mel, this isn't Mel from Married at First Sight, is it? No. Are you one of the specialists? Different Mel. Not Mel Shelley? Are you watching married at first

sight mel i'm not oh what sorry guys hang up on this woman no mal please go ahead and go ahead and just around very understanding you should catch up yeah i'm dobbing in my mom so it's a good one oh yeah here we go let mom have it okay uh She used to line us all up, the three of us, and give us what she called nine-eyes medicine, which was Phenagan, to make us all go to bed early when Dad was looking after us so she could go to housing. What's Phenagan? Phenagan is not mucking around.

All the legs are 11. Phenagan, is Phenagan an antihistamine or a strong emotion sickness thing? It's an antihistamine, yeah. Yeah, strong ant-histamine. Yeah. Not the ones you get these days, which are anti- Anti-dozy.

Anti-dozy. Yeah. Non-drowsy. 4.30, she'd line us up and knock us out. 4.30? Oh, my God. We had friends that used to have to drive quite a way to see their family, and they'd finnegan the kids as they left the house,

and they'd sleep the whole way. What? Shoot. You can't miss the start of housing because sometimes they do an early bird and that's the one with the big prizes. That's where you want to get in. That's what gets you in. Wait, you weren't under five when this was happening, were you? Probably about five.

My father would have been under five, yeah. According to the medicines leaflet that I'm reading now about fennigan is that you shouldn't take it under the age of five. Don't listen to them. I will. Precious.

In the 90s and the 80s. Come on. Yeah. Exactly. They were rogue times. It's like kids these days are so soft. They're not getting fennigan from day one. That is wild.

It's a fennigan epidemic. We're happier here, Mel. Very happy to have you, Mel. Thank you, Mel. Courtney, good morning. Morning. You're not Courtney from maths? No. There happy to have you, Mel. Thank you, Mel. Courtney, good morning. Morning. You're not Courtney from Maths? No.

There is no Courtney on this season. Oh, I'm thinking season four, aren't I? Yeah, you are. You're right there. Sorry, Courtney. I'm watching it, though. I'm watching it. How good is tonight's episode going to be?

I'm a couple behind. Oh, sorry. I'm sorry. Don't say anything. It's all good. It's all good. I'm enjoying it. What are you behind on, Courtney?

Married at First Sight. Thank you. There we go. Now It's all good. I'm enjoying it. What are you behind on, Courtney? Married at first sight. Thank you. There we go. Now, Courtney, tell us about this questionable parenting. Yeah, so this is actually me. I'm dobbing myself in. We've got sips on the other end, by the way, so just be careful. Sips.

Oh, true. That's a good point. No, so she was probably around about four at this point in time, and we kept having a debacle with the pepper shaker. Oh, yeah. And so the pepper grinder. So she would always, at the dinner table, like grind it on the table. And I said to her, I said, if you do it again,

I'm going to make you eat all the pepper that you've ground. So sure enough, she did it again, and shes picking this Pepper And eating it And the next thing She just vomits All over the table

I mean that's on you mum That's on you So I was like I She learned her lesson And I learned her lesson too That's what With parenting

You always learn a lesson When you're dishing out a lesson as well Because after the lesson It's backfire on you Yeah You should have fenniganed it Absolutely You should have fenniganed it Yeah, might we recommend a touch of fennigan

Mashed potatoes and fennigan Thank you, Courtney Some messages in to finish Someone said, oh my gosh, I feel so much better I spike my four-year-old's milkshake with melatonin every night to get them to sleep Melatonin's alright, it's natural Melatonin's natural, right? And people do recommend it to get your cicada rhythm sorted.

Cicadian. Cicada. No, it's because you wake up when the cicadas start and you go to sleep when the cicadas start. I've had it on this whole time. I'm an idiot. It's your cicada system. Gosh, here's some good ones.

When Dad took us whitebaiting in the 1980s, the only drink available was from the flagon that he took with. So if you got thirsty as a kid, you were drinking a beer while you were out whitebaiting. Wow. Wow, yeah, why not? Mum used to hit us with the jug cord. Oh, come on.

You probably deserved it. Well, she couldn't afford the Fentagam. Yeah, we got the wooden spoon and the clad wrap roll. We got the cords. Which every time I go back and I make scrambled eggs for breakfast, it's the same spoon that you see. How do parents make kitchen implements last so long? I know.

Or they don't buy them for like a dollar, you know? We've got a fish slice that's been around since we were kids, a flipper. The handle's broken. But you just grip it a little further down the shaft. I know. You grab the middle bit. They could go to Kmart or the warehouse and buy a new one, but they won't. Why would they need to?

They've got a perfectly good one. My mum used to sneak hip flasks of bourbon into events. She'd put them in my Ugg boots because they knew they wouldn't be searching the Ugg boots of a 12-year-old for booze. Wow. Jeez Louise. My dad hid me in the boot of the car to get me into the rugby for free at the old Waikato Stadium.

He used to pay by the car. Oh, yeah. So all of us kids would get in the boot of the car to get me into the rugby for free at the old Waikato Stadium. He used to pay by the car. So all of us kids would get in the boot so Dad could get us in for free. Did he load you in the boot around the corner or make you drive the 5Ks from home? Oh, he's not going to pull over. It's just a hassle. He'll be all right. But they probably weren't wearing seatbelts

and they probably just folded down the seat as they were going and climbed down the way. Yeah, yeah. Because he's probably in a hurry to get there on time. My one-year-old's favourite game is a game called Drop Baby where she just truss falls out of my arms and expects me to catch her, which I'm fine with because I'm conscious of it. The first time at daycare, not so much.

Oh! My dad used to make me hunch up and squat while I walked through the Speedway turnstiles and say, I'm under five. And I was nine. Hunch up and squat. Hunch up and squat. Make yourself look five.

My mum used kerosene in our hair when we had knits. Would kerosene up our hair and then let us sit close to the gas heater. Jeep. Let's just burn him. That's questionable. Questionable indeed. We used to make saddles and reins out of baling twine and ride the sheep around the sheep yards. And someone opened the yard gate and the sheep jumped out first.

We were off down the road and it was Dad that opened the gate because he thought it would be funny. Gosh. Yeah. Oh, God. Oh, yeah. We were whitewater rafting. My family, my mum and dad had, like, a whitewater raft, but they didn't want to buy us one,

so we went on Lilos and other floatable devices that definitely had written on them not to be used as a safety device. We got separated from our parents once as they went down the river and we crashed into rocks and my brother broke his leg. Oh, no. You're making adventurous kids, though, aren't you? Yeah. See you, see you later. the broker's leg. Oh no. You're making adventurous kids though aren't you? Yeah.

See ya, see ya later. Actually I'm going to have to stop you there that's copyrighted. Susie Cato's a very good friend of mine. She's already sued me twice so if you could maybe

get her to drop her litigious action that would be great. Tell her I'll review her five stars if she does the same for this podcast and then she tells

all her friends. And if you're listening maybe give it five stars as well.