ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 22nd November 2022

Episode Date: November 21, 2022

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The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCaffey. Great barista made coffee on the go. What date is it? Today is the 22nd of November. Great, well this is late.

June 18th, November 2022. You've got a pile of bills. On the 17th of October 2022 at 2.33, your vehicle was driven in a bus lane on Khyber Pass Road. No. Yes, it was technically because it got photos. However. Who's driving?

When they send you the infringement, they send you the photo. Yeah, they send you photos. Can I look at the photo? How clear is it? Are you on your phone? Picking your nose? Not on my phone.

Not picking my nose. But you can't see who's driving. Oh my God. But look at your car is literally in the middle of that green square. So what happened is, what happened is, I was, Newmarket, right, in Auckland, is a chaos to try to find a park where you need to go. So I was looping around the block and I came out of the side street by, what is it, Doolin, Danny Doolin, Danny Doolin's Irish pub.

And I came out and I turned to come into the lane and then the guy didn't let me in. He just like kept driving. So I had to pull into the bus lane and I didn't drive in it. I stayed there indicating. Oh, contest. Because your indicator's on. Yeah, your indicator's on.

I did it to pull into the next lane, but no one was letting me in. Contest. Don't pay. Contest. Fucking will. Fucking contest! $150! Because the last photo, you're not in the lane, are you?

You're in the normal lane. I'm contesting. Contest! That's the thing. That's what they count on. People not contesting. People not being effed with it. Just paying with it. Contest. Do you know what I did last night? I sent a picture of my boobs. Did you? I can do that. Here's a picture of you in the bus lane. You're like, here my tutties.

I think you'll find these are well within there. See, I came out of this street and they didn't let me in, dickos. And then they were at a red light so then I had to pull into the bus lane and now it's cost me $150 and it's late. Right, what's this other one? No, it's the same one.

It's the same one. Okay, right. Is it? Yeah, it is the same one. Have you had a ticket yet from the speed camera outside work? No, it's the same one. It's the same one. Okay, right. Is it? Yeah, it is the same one. Have you had a ticket yet from the speed camera outside work? No, because- It's bullshit. I reckon it's a cardboard box.

I've driven- It's a shoebox. I drive past it. I drive in between the two speed checks at 40 kilometers an hour, no more. I don't.

But it's amazing how many cars fly through it. You're like, oh, no. Yeah, I don't think it's a cardboard box. But you still haven't got your ticket. So I remember

I was in Vaughan's remember we were in my dad's ute in your dad's ute and we were in the bus lane accidentally and then Vaughan wrote them a letter

saying he was from the little old hey I'm from out of town I was in the beach smelled awful confused like I once got

$440 in one day because I had no warrant no rego and I was parked over time so $440 in one day because I had no warrant, no rego, and I was parked over time. So $4,200, $200. Oh, wow. And I wrote to them and said I was a drama student and I had no money either. Yeah. And they let me off.

Did they? Yeah. Not to my money. My rich mummy helped me write the email. But I got off. So I think I am going to. I'm going to. Contest it.

I'm going to contest. Because I got a bill This week from GIST I don't know who they are Oh yeah Apparently I was late Paying GIST And I was stung With a GIST fee

Really GIST fee GIST A GIST late fee I hate GIST Fuck you GIST Fuck you what are ya You give it to me

And I give it to them But you like You like everything That tax gives you though though, like health care. No, GIST doesn't make any sense. What does GST give us? That's what my income tax is for. It gives us a false sense of money in your bank account until they ask for it back.

Yeah. And you go, whoopsie, whoopsie, I spent it. Yeah. On a fucking parking ticket when I didn't do anything wrong. Good luck with that. Thanks. Thank you, Lee. Good morning.

Welcome to the show, Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. Three minutes past six. She's back. She's back and better than ever. She's back. She's back. On the antibiotics. On the anti-Bs.

You popped a couple of those this morning. I did. You got the Difflam spray. I've got a throat infection, guys. Don't know how I got it. It's not strep. That's what I thought it was. And it's not contagious.

Not contagious. I mean, maybe if you tongued the back of my throat, but I don't think we're going to get there today, guys. I don't think so. I don't think today's your lucky day. I don't think so. Today's not the day. It's just the only thing that gets me out of bed in the morning.

It's today the day I get to tongue the back of Sproul's throat. But if that doesn't get you up at back of Sproul's throat. But if that doesn't get done Wait a minute. Does this change your mind? Choro Club card. Oh.

Somebody's opened the mail and they've got their company purchased Choro Club membership. That's a company purchase.

That steals away a little bit of my Jenny Say Quant. Oh, do you want to have the ear of a man who pays for a quarter? No, not really. I don't think anybody would believe that. What are you going to do

the next time you're in the lounge? Where are you heading first? Eggs. Always eggs for breakfast, isn't it? Yeah. Rush from work to get there in time for eggs. Oh, yum. Now I want eggs. Now. As well as then. I had in time for eggs. Oh, yum. Now I want eggs. Now.

As well as then. I had mints for breakfast. Yum. You're hanging out like a single man, old man, microwave meal. Frozen meal. I ordered these microwave meals as like a backup because we're renovating, right? No kitchen and sometimes you're on the go. Yeah.

And we haven't eaten them yet. So I grabbed one out of the freezer this morning because there was no brekkie options. It was good. Oh, so these weren't meals that you had made previous and frozen. No, no, no. These were purchased. From a company. Oh, okay. It was pretty good, man. Okay. What is it? Like the

Benis Mene? We just want to make sure you're looking after yourself. Healthy choice? I am. I am looking after myself. Yeah, it was a keto option. It was a low-carb cottage pie. A breakfast cottage pie. Cauliflower on top. I don't think anybody should be smelling mints at 5.30 in the morning.

Yeah, I've really minced out the studio. If you smell mints, you've either got a great start to the day or something's gone terribly wrong. It really has. Option D for me. Coming up on the show today, we're on 7.30. We'll give you the chance to get to Symphony next year, 2023, at Auckland's Domain. We've got a double pass.

You've got to guess the song that Hayley will be playing on the electronic keyboard. Is that what you call that thing? Or electronic piano? Just a keyboard. Keyboard, on the keyboard. On the keys. Okay, because you were sick yesterday. Vaughan? Just a keyboard. Keyboard, on the keyboard. On the keys. Okay, because you were sick yesterday. Vaughan and I had to play a pre-recorded one.

I thought you were going to say Vaughan and I had to play it. I was like, what did you do? A little duet? We toyed with the idea, but it's a lot of effort for a Monday. Yeah. So 7.30. And then I tell you what, have we got some celebrities lined up after 7 this morning? Thank you for holding off on Monday Maestros.

Well, yeah. I've got a huge get. Thank you for holding off on Monday Maestros. Well, yeah. I've got a huge get. Do you? Okay, well, the challenge was come to the show with a huge celebrity, the most famous celebrity you know, get them on the show. So after 8 this morning, we've all got somebody lined up. Mine's going to shock you. But there's somebody even more special joining us after 7.

I think celebrities be damned. We've got a show favourite after seven this morning. Max is coming in. Yeah. The octopus number nine. Octopus night. Our so-called octopus night. Yeah, we've been following his journey with the school production.

Last week was the school production. Yeah. So we're going to get an in-person review on how it all went for octopus nine. That's after seven. Coming up on the show, the top six. Yesterday, it's so cute. We've got a Supreme Court. Do we?

Yeah. Yeah. Do we? Not just America. I know, it's real cute. I know it's nice that we've opened our courts to sponsorship by elite clothing brands. They all wear the white shirts with the red box with Supreme written in it. Yeah.

And they just look absolutely dope. They do. They look dope. They look dope. They look dope, y'all. Sick. So they've said that the voting age should be 16. Yeah. Which doesn't mean it's going to be.

No, because it'll still have to go through parliament, and they don't think that's going to get through because old white guys are worried that young people don't have the same political sensibilities as them. Yeah. Okay. So the top six dealing with this. Yeah.

Top six things I'd have voted for at 16. My breakfast mince is repeating on me a little bit. I just said sort of a hiccup burp full of mince. Now, I think it was last week, it was a week ago actually, almost exactly, that Joe Lycett, comedian, British comedian, very funny guy, made an appeal, an online appeal to David Beckham, footballer, married to Posh Spice, to end his relationship with the Qatar World Cup

because of Qatar's terrible human rights. Yeah. In particular for him it was like Qatar's rules, I guess laws around homosexuality and he was going, you have been an ally for years

and by you being the face of this World Cup, in which how much was he getting paid? Like David Beckham was getting paid millions and millions and millions of dollars. It sort of goes against what he stood for in the past. And he said he would shred 10,000 pounds of his own cash in a week if David Beckham didn't pull out of the partnership.

And then a week went on and time was sort of ticking. The World Cup started. The World Cup started. The World Cup started. David Beckham was there. Yeah. So obviously, and David Beckham never responded. And so last night, there was this amazing video that Joe Lysett posted and he's wearing a rainbow tulle pom-pom top.

It was a whole lot, wasn't it? It was a lot. And there was like a close-up of 10,000 pounds cash, so 20 grand, New Zealand, and a wood chipper, would you call it? Yeah, like a garden shredder. Oh, okay. And then he walks into it with his rainbow pom-pom top,

picks it up, shreds it, and then he's just like, I told you. I said I'd do this, and you didn't respond. Everyone was like, wow, he did it. And then just, I think it's just like I told you I said I'd do this and you didn't respond and everyone was like wow he did it and then just

I think it was even like overnight right he's released another video and he said like wow this is my final message to you David Beckham I didn't do it

so it wasn't real he didn't shred it it was fake money well he said something like the money was real but what came out the other end wasn't

so it was all kind of like organised and he didn't do that and he said something like the money was real, but what came out the other end wasn't. So it was all kind of like organised and he didn't do that. And he said in fact, even before he made that first appeal, he'd already donated it to LGBTQ plus charities. Oh wow, okay. And then what he did shred in the end, well it was really, it's actually

very clever. He said what the money, like obviously he made a donation he said the whole thing was just to have a conversation like it's just a publicity stunt and he's admitted it and gone like yeah this has just sparked

a conversation which it has very much so it popped off online that's what somebody said even if he did shred the money someone said

you should have donated to a charity in the comment section of one post and somebody said well if you think of this as an awareness campaign, like he's generated millions and millions and millions

and millions of dollars of publicity for this. So what he did shred in the end was he called out the fact of David Beckham's relationship with the LGBTQI plus community, and then he took the cover of Attitude magazine, which is kind of like our express. Yeah, right. Like the gay magazine of the UK. In 2002, David Beckham was on the cover about being an ally

and he shredded that instead. Ooh. Shots fired. Anyway, it's been such an entertaining, I mean, it's not an entertaining topic, I guess, but it's been a very like entertaining watch to see how he's kind of curated this. Yeah.

The latest episode of John Oliver's Last Week Tonight, which I love watching every week, it's on Neon in New Zealand. His deep dive this week is into the FIFA World Cup and how corrupt it is and how the human rights are in Qatar. Yeah. How many people died building stadiums.

I know. Did you see the opening ceremony with Morgan Freeman. Yeah. How many people died building the stadiums? I know. Did you see the opening ceremony with Morgan Freeman? Yeah. Bizarre. But, I mean, once you've slept with your step-granddaughter, I don't think your name can be too much. I don't think you care too much what the world thinks of you at that stage. He slept with his step-granddaughter. Didn't he?

Morgan. That's what he did, eh? Because there was a list the other day. It was like, actors no one hates. And it was Keanu Reeves and him sitting at a table. I'm like, what? He's got a cool voice, yes, but didn't he do something really weird? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Well, a woman has done a tell-all interview with the Daily Mail about the last two years of her life in the pandemic lockdown. She started an OnlyFans. Lots of people did. A lot of people did, you know, earn a bit of extra cash, a bit of a side hustle. I saw a TikTok yesterday about two sisters that started a flower farm. That's nice.

And they started small and then last year it was bigger and this year it's even bigger. It's like 20 times as big as it was in 2020. That's nice. And they started small and then last year it was bigger and this year it's even bigger. It's like 20 times as big as it was in 2020. Yeah, right. And they didn't have to show their fanny to a single person. I was going to say, are they naked amongst the puppies? You reclaim your body, babes. You do you. But I'm just saying not everybody needs

to go on OnlyFans. There's other options out there. Well, yeah, I think that most people wouldn't be making as much money as she is. So two years on, she is making, I worked it out, New Zealand dollars, $49,000 a month. Get... A month.

So she says she puts in about 30 to 40 hours a week making content. Jeepers. And messaging fans. Too many hours a week. No one should be working that much. Yeah, but she's got to pay the bills somehow. So it's either work in an office for 40 hours or more a week.

Yeah. Or work at home for 30 to 40. Why is she doing so well? She's mega hot. She puts it down, and this is why I said you couldn't do this. She puts it down to her hairy armpits. Oh, damn it. And the fact that she doesn't wear deodorant.

Now, I know you wear deodorant. You can't smell that on OnlyFans, though. No, you can't. You can imagine. Use your imagination. Yeah. As top tier. As her top tier OnlyFans, she's sending a little sample out.

Oh, yeah. She'll wear a hanky under her arm for the day and then. Well, maybe. Send it out to you. Famously, you've lasered it off. So you've lasered off the moneymaker. I've lasered off the moneymaker. I'm a slippery eel.

Damn it. I would have kept it if I'd known it. 50K a month. Yeah. That's a lot of money, isn't it? To put it in perspective, my OnlyFans, I made nothing. In fact, I owe them money. And now... You owe them, I owe them money. And now...

You owe them, yeah. You owe them money. You're in debt. It was so gross. They said you have to pay... They said, sir, you've taken up a lot of server space. Yeah. With your constant uploading.

Yeah. Because I read Shakespeare, but what I did is I put some googly eyes on my bum and then just opened my bum my bum was the mouth and I decided that is the question

wow yeah like that the whole thing and all the entire works of William Shakespeare you can imagine quite a lot of video

a lot of content a lot of content yeah it's really surprising that didn't take off because you know other OnlyFans models show you know, the butt. Yeah.

Butt's a big money maker. Might have been a bit hole heavy. Really quite zoomed in as well. It started the cheek and the shape and, you know, the alluringness of the butt. So this was very hole heavy. She also says in this interview, just moving away from your Shakespearean OnlyFans. Out, damn spot, out! She also says she does interview, just moving away from your Shakespearean fans. Out, damn spot, out.

She also says she does special requests for fans, including sitting on cakes. You could do that. No, that's quite whole heavy. Squishing cake. What would the Shakespearean actor be just taking a small cake break during that? Yes, yes. Okay. And the other thing that she often does is humiliate men about the size of... What?

Love this shit, eh? What's wrong? This is crazy. So if you've got a small ding dong, you pay money to get her to say, you've got a tiny ding dong. Yes. And humiliate you. And she's making $50,000 New Zealand dollars a month.

We're not here to kink shame. No, not at all. I'll sit on a cake. Listeners, do you want me to sit on a cake? I'll sit on a cake. Okay, don't, because people will. You know this. DM me on Instagram.

And then she'll smush your feeties in the cake. Yeah. Oh, the feet people will love that. Yeah, I'll get one of those cream sponges. Yeah. In the supermarket. Put my feet in it. Yeah. In the supermarket. Put my feet in it. Yeah. Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing of attempt.

Oh my God. Om, om, om, om, om. That's my butt. It's a hungry bum. Yeah. He's hungry. He's eating so much cake. Play.

C.D.M.'s Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the Top Six. Hey! Today's Top Six are dealing with the fact that the Supreme Court of New Zealand has said that it isn't fair

that 16-year-olds aren't allowed to vote and we should give that a rethink. It has to pass through Parliament, which we believe will be the big stumbling block. Because as these two text messages that were meant to be sent to News2XZB but came into us, this is your average white

middle-aged man's opinion. While my 16-year-old daughter would be fine with voting, her friends don't even know what left and right means and wouldn't be able to explain the difference between communism and democracy. They'd vote on a pretty smile and great teeth. That was meant for upstairs. Communism and democracy. They'd vote on a pretty smile and great teeth. Wow, okay.

That was meant for upstairs. Right, right, yeah. Do we have a similar text number, do we? Yes. To the hosk. We're 9696. That's ZBZB. They are 9292.

I thought he would have gone the opposite, been 6969. Nice. I thought he would have gone the opposite been 6969 Nice So these are the top 6 things I would have voted on at age 16 If you were given the If I was given the vote Yeah okay Number 6 on the list

more sleep-ins Yeah Love to sleep in at 16 Yeah later school start like 11am Love to sleep in Number 5 on the list of the top 6 things I'd have voted for at 16.

Less hours at school. So yeah, if we're getting there at 11, maybe we still leave at three. Leave at two. Does this mean we could have... It was pretty hot in those summer months, wasn't it? Yeah, man. About two o'clock. Does this mean we could have a 16-year-old MP?

If you can vote at... There would be a youth MP, right? Like a younger, teen MP. I'd probably skew the age a little bit younger, but probably not. Yeah, but you're opening the door to some TikToker being a 16-year-old MP. That's cool, man.

I'm down with it. Gotta have that TikTok representation. You gotta have it. Let them be speaker of the house. Yeah. No cap, no cap. This session ain't busting. And if they're behind

it, we have no choice. Yeah. But to stand our green queen. Her green queen, Chloe. Number four on the list of the top six

things I would have voted for at 16. Make it easier to get a driver's license. What? Just give them out? Just this waiting rigmarole.

Just let me. Oh, yeah waiting rigmarole. Just let me drive you, you know what I mean? Number three on the list of the top six things I would have voted for at 16, this would have been 1998. I would have voted for Green Day to make another album immediately. Yeah. Loved me a little bit of Green Day in 98.

Loved it. Just off the back of Dookie. Nimrod, actually. Nimrod was the 97 album that really got me into it, and then the back of Dookie. Nimrod. Nimrod. Actually, yeah. Nimrod was the 97 album that really got me into it. And then you had your Dookie. Oh, that was a bloody good album too. Number two on the list of the top six things I'd have voted for at 16. Take the tax off those big bags of farm-baked cookies. Because then maybe mum will buy more of them

and me and my brother can just keep smashing bags of them after school. I think it was the orange one? Yes. Orange choc chip. God, they were big units of Smith boys, weren't they? We weren't afraid of a, tell you what, we weren't afraid of a carbohydrate. No. Half a loaf of white bread and some five-eight cookies.

And number one on the list of the top six things I'd have voted for at the age of 16. Make the internet free and fast. It seems like a great tool, but bitmaps take three minutes to load and it's $10 an hour. Again, it was 1998. Young Vaughan got his wish, though, didn't he? He did. Had to wait a little bit. Had to wait a long time.

But this year, yeah, with Starlink, I finally got my wish. Living in the country and having fast internet. That is today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. fast internet. That is today's top six. I reckon the worst part of going to the dentist is the injection. I hate injections in the gums. Yes, but it's done quickly and then you don't feel

anything. The worst part of going to the dentist is how much it costs on the way out. You wouldn't even know. You've got to do a payment know. You haven't been. You've got to do a payment plan. You haven't been for 12 years. You've got a temporary crown and you're still going. Yeah.

You'd be an absolute mess under there. Yeah. Yeah. Don't do it. When it starts smelling is when I'm going to take care of it. You don't have bad breath. No. And I always check.

I check for shut-eye often. I'll never forget the time I had a cap taken off, a crown, and the smell. Lofty lofty. It was like something was dead. It was all sealed under there, wasn't it? It was sealed under there, yeah. Fuck.

It doesn't hurt or anything. Nah, gross. I'm okay, I'm okay. Well, you can get a different type of injection now at the dentist. This is in Australia, which doesn't surprise me. Okay. Because they love a bit of the Botox. The women are keeping it tight.

Especially in Sydney and Melbourne. Yeah. The last time I was in Melbourne, I was like, holy moly. What, does everyone have a... Everyone's got plastic surgery. But Botox keeps it... Toy. Toy.

But fillers are the puffy ones. Puffy ones. Puffy stuff When people look like a different person. You get a cheek filler and suddenly their eyes can't open anymore. Yeah, because doesn't Botox

just like that? It stops you moving. Yeah, it stops you moving. Maybe stops a wrinkle from forming or something. Yeah, some people go a bit far with that too. Yeah, it's the slippery slope,

isn't it? Yeah. I heard what you're saying. You know, if that's how you want to look, you look like a... I won't say it. Anyway, so apparently more dentists in Australia

are performing cosmetic injections, like Botox. Well, I guess it's that kind of their area of face, right? The face is their thing, dentists. So they're going one-stop shop. They know a face better than anyone else, they say. Better than, like, because usually you go usually you go to a beauty treatment place. I'm not saying they're not trained. They are.

But they're going, we've literally learned every muscle in the face in our dentistry studies that they know a lot. And a Sydney dentist, he said that 30% of his customers, of his patients, are now adding this service on. So you go in for a, maybe he's a hygienist. Right. So you go in for like a scale and a polish. Oh, yeah, okay. Which I love.

Yeah, how good do your teeth feel after a hygienist? You wouldn't know. Did you ever go to the hygienist? Yeah, no, no, no. No, I don't go to the hygienist because they're not going to tell me to go to the dentist. But I have been to a hygienist. Yeah, they don't see you until the dentist is seeing you. Yeah.

Make the bloody mess of your gums afterwards, right? Yes, exactly. Well, yeah, so you go in for a scale and polish and then you might get a little z-z-z-boomp behind, you know, between the eyebrows. Yeah, because how long does Botox last? I don't know, a few months. Because would you do that every three months?

You'd just get every six months. Well, I go to the hygienist every six months. Just get your Botox and your hygiene done at the same time. How long does Botox last? I want to say three months. Three to four months. Yeah. He knows. He's had a couple of shots. Well, no, because I've seen my friend you know, Maddie McLean's mum does it.

Yes. Yeah, I've watched her. Oh, she injects, eh? Yeah, yeah, she does it. I don't know. I hook up a little Mates Rates. I've never had it. I don't know if she does Mates Rates, but yeah. Yeah, I've watched her. Oh, she injects same? Yeah, yeah, she does it, yeah. Oh, I don't know, hook up a little Mates Rates. I've never had it. I don't know if she does Mates Rates, but yeah. Yeah, I remember Edna Swart from Boss Babes. You know her? She's an influencer and an entrepreneur.

She was on Celebrity Treasure Island a season ago, didn't she? I remember when I first met her in person and she asked me if I'd had it because I'd keep it tight. And I said no. And I said, no. And I said, why have you? And she said, yeah. And she was saying that she uses it as a preventative. She doesn't have wrinkles yet.

That's what they say. You get it done young. Before. To stop the wrinkles, the crow's eyes. I think it's too late for me. Oh my God, you're well and truly past it. You can't. What are you going to do with that?

You'll need to go straight for the nip-tuck, babes. Staples. Pull back behind the ears. Yeah. We can do a lot. I just want to get a sharpie out and draw some lines on your face where we'll make the incisions.

Okay, yeah. Pull back. I reckon it's a bulldog clip. Yeah, on the back. The back. Just get it back. Yeah, that's it. That's it Good stuff

Yesterday After work I was at the gymnasium Okay The gymnasium with the Fitness equipment Yeah And

I saw that you had a big workout yesterday Do you still get those notifications? Yeah I tried to turn them off Because I didn't want to like Rub in how well I'm doing And I... I saw that you had a big workout yesterday. Do you still get those notifications? Yeah. I tried to turn them off because I didn't want to like... Robin, how well I'm doing. Because I took a week off the gym. That's my little motivation. I wanted to finish and send you an immediate alert.

Yeah. To let you know I just finished a workout. Yeah, you did a biggie. Yeah, I think it's paying off in the glutes. Can I just take a moment? Oh, okay. My wife complimented the glutes. Did she?

Well, the jeans. These jeans were falling off the other day. That's a problem. Yeah, right. Well, that's not good for the glutes if your jeans are falling off. No, but at the bottom I'm getting a bit more. Yeah. Oh, yeah, okay. Good stuff.

Slap it. Slap it for mummy? Slap it for mummy. Oh, there you go. Thank you. It's three for you. So I was there and I got a notification and then I had a new email and it popped up

and it was from the girls' school and it said, this school has entered lockdown. And I was like, what? Wow. Because the school a little while ago had a practice lockdown of what would happen in a situation. And the kids were like, because I guess we never talked about it. Yeah.

Yeah, and it hadn't been on the radar. And, of course, they can't tell the kids they're about to do it because the idea is in a drill, like a fire drill or whatever, is that you need to know how to react. Yes. And so they did a drill a little while ago, like a lockdown, and they told the little kids there was like a dog on the field, like a dangerous dog.

They told the older kids that there was a suspicious person. I guess they just kind of catered it. They told the older kids that there was a suspicious person. I guess they just kind of catered it. They told the older kids there was a drugged out gunman. And the oldest kids were told it was the zombie apocalypse.

It was, you know, they scaled it. They teared it. They teared it. But yesterday there was an actual lockdown. Yeah, if you saw one of the news,

that was my kid's school that went into lockdown because of a firearms incident right by their school. so it's around the block wasn't it yeah and the police raided a house yeah yeah yeah a house right next to a kindergarten which is where you want your firearms yes yeah um so you i saw that and i messaged shadow and i was like is this another drill and she's like no because they told the parents about the drill yeah right i was like oh and then I looked out the window of the gym

and there's the helicopter doing the rounds. And then I just watched these, vroom, vroom, wee-oo, wee-oo, police cars flying past and everything. Were you scared? I don't, like a little bit, but my main thought was, thank God we don't live in America. Because if that happens in America, like- This was very American though, wasn't it?

Well, someone's gone into the school in America. This was just in the neighbourhood of the school. I guess I was a little bit scared. Because the NRC to parents, like stay away from the school. You weren't allowed to get in there. You weren't allowed to drive to the school or don't call the school. Right. Because, you know,

the protocol from the Ministry of Education is to trust the teachers in the situation. You didn't think about getting the bulletproof chimney in there? I thought about doing it. I thought about gathering up the local dad's vigilante page. Yeah. You know, just a whole bunch of rickety old farms of shotguns

and.22s out the window and storming the school. And evac the kids? Nah. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I was a little bit worried, but I guess what can you do? I just waited and trusted the process. How long were they locked down for? They were locked down for like two and a half hours.

Far out. What did the girls say at the end of the day? The August was stoked. They got to watch a movie. So wait, they were just watching a movie? They had to lie on the floor. So you have to lie under the window level. Oh, because bullets.

Stray bullets, I'm imagining. And they have to lie down there and they turn all the lights off and if you've got curtains, you pull the curtains and... That sounds like a fun day at school. Yeah. And then you just chill on the floor and you watch a... They watched a movie. Chill on the floor. Chill on the floor and watch a movie. In case of Mad Gunman. Yeah. That terrifies

me. And Indies class. I think they just did, yeah, they did some art and stuff, grabbed some paper and they said it wasn't... Because they'd done the drill, they were kind of like prepared for it. Right. Yeah, but it was pretty, yeah. But the main note of don't come down to the school was completely ignored

by a lot of parents. They went down. They went down, yeah. I don't know, yeah, if you were people were saying that it was very anxiety inducing. Yeah. So what happened? Do we know? Because then when I finished at the gym and I drove past,

there was like news cameras and stuff, and I was like, oh, my God, my daughter's going to be on the news, and she's going to be like, how was it? And she was like, it was bussing, no cap. And I was just like, oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no.

She's gone and gone. Full lingo on the news. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. She's gone and gone. Full lingo on the news. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole.

Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly Little Poll. Silly Little Poll. Silly Little Poll. Silly Little Poll. Well, today's Silly Little Poll. After the news yesterday, the Supreme Court of New Zealand. We've got a Supreme Court. Who knew?

Who knew? Who was in it? Who was it? Mushrooms, ham, cheese. Capsicum. Capsicum. Yum. Bacon bits. Everything in the pizza. Yeah. Yeah, that's on the court. How is it supreme?

Like when you're panicking, you don't know what to get. You get a supreme. Get a supreme. Yeah. It's sort of everything. Well, yesterday the Supreme Court saying that 16 year olds, 17 year olds, should be able to vote in New Zealand elections. Jesus, not me when I was 16. Holy moly. Who would you have when I was 16. Holy moly.

Who would you have voted for at 16? Marilyn Manson. There used to be a party. God bless them. They were a fun time. I think they stopped just before I could vote. Or maybe they were there the first time I looked. The McGillicuddy Serious Party. Yeah, and every election. They were like these crazy dudes that rocked around in Scottish

outfits with bagpipes and stuff. Cool. They always had ridiculous policies. It was pretty fun, though. It was, yeah. I don't know what ever happened to them. I think they said, if we don't get in this time, we're out. And then they didn't get in, so they were out.

Who was the spaghetti party? The spaghetti monster? Flies? Wasn't that the census? Or the religion of the fire? Oh, the religion. Yeah, the past thepharians. Yeah.

Well, we wanted to know with our silly little poll today if your first vote was influenced by your parents. Mine was. Because we were talking about this and we thought, well, let's see if the...

Because we had a friend as well who her dad like basically said, you're voting national. Yes, she was instructed. My parents didn't instruct me. And no one said in terms of she wished to keep receiving the student allowance. Yeah, yeah, you're voting national or that's it. I just didn't follow politics at that time in my life.

And so I was just like, I knew my parents voted for national, I'll admit it. And I voted national in my first. But that's the thing about giving the vote to 16 year olds. If they're not interested and they don't want to vote they're not going to vote anyway.

But there are some that wish to be involved in the future of their country that they will stand to inherit. Yeah.

Good on them. I don't see a problem with it if they care enough to do it. But I honestly think the majority of which will just be

parents just saying yeah I'll vote for this one. Yeah they'll get two votes. Or filling it in and sending it in for them.

Yeah, on their behalf. It was like when women first got to vote and their husbands were just voting for them. It was pretty wild. Progressive.

You can't be trusted. You can't be trusted. We can't be. We're mad at the hormones. It's the hormones. And it's very confusing, home. All those boxes and tics.

All these tics. Which one of those are tics? Yeah. All right, silly Which one of those are ticks? Yeah. All right, silly little poll. Did you, in your first voting in the election, did you vote the same as your parents? 65% of people said yes.

Yeah. 35% said no. So that's two-thirds said yes, basically. Do you think it's because you just grow up in that household and they're either yelling at one of the prime ministers or leaders of the party? I remember it so much growing up because I grew up with a bunch of farmers and they would say horrendous things

about David Lange. And I was like, I don't even know who he is but I know that I've heard nothing but bad things from all these national voting farmers. I just never learnt how politics affected me until I was older. So I didn't care.

I was like, I don't know. Or it affected everybody else. I didn't know how it worked. Yeah, no. Emily said, Auntie Helen was offering up Interest-Free Student Alliance. Couldn't pass up on that.

Oh, yeah. And the artist benefit. She had the artist benefit. Yeah. She loved spending money, didn't she? Sorry, that's a little bit of that farm.

Yeah. Ironically, imagine how much of that artist benefit helped the people that want concerts at Eden Park that she doesn't like. Full circle, isn't it? That's a full circle moment. Be careful what you wish for, Helen. You've funded these hippy-dippy

doodars. Ashley, my first vote, my parents told me to vote Labour. I rebelled and voted for somebody else. You should have seen their face when I told them. Alex says, nah, I'm a Greens baby through and through. Okay. Oh, this one's anonymous.

I'm too dumb and bogan at 18. I voted for the Red Party because I was into Holdens and not Fords. Cringe. Oh, gosh. You voted on colour?ords. Cringe. Oh, gosh. You voted on colour? They voted on colour. Oh, wow. If you were in the Bloods, could you vote for National?

I don't know. Which is the Bloods? The Bloods is red. The Bloods is red. The Crips is blue. Oh, okay. I think they've probably got their own internal voting system. Yeah.

I don't know who, though. That's all I'll say about Bloods and Crows. What are you in? Do you know, do you? Maybe. Maybe. Morgan said yes because I had no idea who to vote for, so I asked them.

No word if that's still who Morgan would vote for now. Okay. I was split as my parents always voted differently from each other. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Controversial. Could you be with someone that was so far opposed to you politically? I mean, if it was far, far, far away from my politics.

How would you do it? If you were both sort of centralist, but just a little bit left and a little bit right, I can see how you'd make that work. Yeah. A little bit of light banter. But if you were extremes, it would be quite hard. Especially in a country like America, right? You'd be like, you just couldn't. Abby said, yes,

I did and I'm still embarrassed about it. I felt obliged to vote what was best for them and didn't have as solid of views as I do now. Sarah said, no way, my dad's a big time gnat and I'm 90% Labour with 10% green. Just a sprinkling of green thrown in. It's quite interesting because some people did take this as us saying

that we don't agree that the voting age should be 16, 17. Oh, no, that's not at all. When we put this poll up. No, it was simply asking. Yeah, but a lot of people were influenced by their parents, weren't they? Yes. That's very interesting. As you are when you're a teenager, even though you've told them that

you're not the boss of the area. You don't know what it's like. You don't know what it's like. You don't know what it's like. But yeah, you don't know what else is out there, so you just do it. I wish I was never born. Then you want to vote for the Greens. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Today's fact of the day is about the habanera pepper, not the habanero. Oh, right. The habanera. Okay. The habanera was developed by scientists To have the taste of a habanero Without any of the spice Oh what's the point? It's called a capsicum

It's like a capsicum that tastes different yeah Okay So the habanero pepper Hot that's a hot one It's a hottie That's a hottie Hotter than a bloody jalapeno. Yes.

Not as hot as, I've planted some this year that have got crazy names. Really? There's ghost. Oh no, that sounds terrible. Yeah. What are you going to use it for? Have you planted the gooch tickler? The gooch tickler is planted.

That one gets you on fire. The ring burner, the tongue sweater, the gut rumbler. All of them. No, thank you. Another one's got death in the title, but I can't remember what one it is. I'm going to be good. I'll just stick to the sweet chilli sauce when I come around to your house. Yeah, you love the Thai sweet chilli.

I'm going to need some milk. You know what? Exciting week for me because I get to open my new 5 litre sweet chilli container. Jesus. How long does it take you to get through 5 litres of sweet chilli? Not long. Not long. Good. He loves his sweet chilli. Well yeah, Habanero is for people that like the taste

but don't like the heat of the Habanero pepper. It was invented by scientists who basically wanted to see if they could do it. Okay. And they did it. How'd they do it? They, I believe, mixed a Habanero with a capsicum. And they took all the, they bred the capsicum out of it. That's the hot stuff.

Okay. That's the stuff that gets you onto the Scoville scale. Right. And they bred that out of it. So, yeah, you can now taste the pepper without burning your mouth mouth. Perfect for mum and dad. Yeah. Famously, mum and dads don't like a lot of spice, do they?

But I think it's all up here. Yeah, right. Sometimes even a capsicum might get them going a little bit. Yeah. They might need a little drink of milk. Yeah, but today's fact of the day is there's a pepper out there for you if you love the taste without the heat. It's the habanera.

Fact of the day, day, day, day exciting day. An exciting moment for all of us, in fact. We have long been following the journey of young Max, who first auditioned for the role of Costco voiceover. Correct. With us. Yeah. Which is where we learned that he had not been cast

in the role he desired in the local school play. We absolutely lost it, didn't we? We did, yeah. We were beside ourselves. I apologise for my actions. I raged. He did. He nearly flipped the table.

And then we touched base again during the last long weekend group tour in which Max and Mum absolutely nailed it. And then we found out that Max was auditioning for what we believed was the Octopus Knight, but we were quickly corrected. Octopus Nine. Number nine, yes. That performance has happened and joining us in studio is the Octopus Number Nine himself. Max, welcome.

Hello. Okay, Max, we're so excited to have been following your journey as a young actor. Cool. The question we have to ask how was the show? It was amazing. Was it amazing? Yeah. Tell us why it was amazing. It was like the main characters

got these cool mics that came down from their ears and they came down to their mouth. Like a Britney Spears microphone. Yeah. But the worst probably was we had to wear makeup. You don't like wearing makeup? No.

What kind of makeup did you have to wear for Octopus 9? We had to use foundation. Everyone had to use foundation. The boys' brown lipstick. Why? You didn't like it? No, and then black eyeshadow and then eyeliner. Oh, wow.

The full face. That sounds like a glamorous octopus. Yeah. Did you get a microphone? Nah, we got shotgun microphones. This is a posh school production. We just had to yell. You went to yell as well. To the back of the hall.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. All the way to the back. Did you nail all of your lines? Yep. Perfect. Can you remind us your line because you did perform it for us. All right. That's brilliant, Tentacles. How exactly was it returning the sea blue?

Yes. Nailed it, nailed it. It's even better in person. It's on stage right now. And obviously, we've been sharing this journey with all of our listeners. Have people been sending you

good words of encouragement? Yeah, everyone, the day after the long weekend group they all surrounded me Max, we heard you on the long weekend group too and everyone was saying that, like a lot

of kids and then there was this kid who was like, oh it's not that hard, I've been on the newspaper. Sorry! Give me this kid's name back! I'll ruin his life! No, you can't.

No, you can't. Sounds jealous. He sounds jealous. Sounds a little bit jealous. So now that you've performed Octopus No. 9, what's next? I'm actually so happy now. It was so tiring. Yeah, I bet.

He needs a little break. This is important. The big Hollywood bear. He needs a little break. He said, break, this is important. The big Hollywood stars have a break between massive projects. Because we were the second to last dance. So we had to wait for all the dances and then second to last dance and then all the curtains shut and then we went off, had our lunch and came back and did our dance. Jeepers.

It's a long day. Because do you know in the industry though, in the live performance world, the better acts are at the end. So you've always got your warm-up acts and there's your headliners are the best to last. I found out I won the best. Everyone was kind of getting a bit lame. They'd just come behind the curtains.

Yeah. But then my group of octopus, there are two lines, my line and Ava's line, and we would come down the stairs and then, like, Archer goes up the fire of the reef, Awaken, come forth, up the fire of the reef, Awaken, come forth,

and all that stuff. They should have been the Archer. They should have been the Archer. Yeah, yeah. Nah, I can't do it. Yes, you can just do it. Well, you just did. Next time. It's not all that. That's not all of it. It good that was? Yeah, yeah. Nah, I can't do it. Yes, you can just do it. Well, you just did. Next time. It's not all that. That's not all of it. It's much harder.

Oh, okay. I don't think I can do it. Do you think now, though, that you've taken on this smaller role and you've nailed it and had such a good time that next production you might be able to do a bigger part? Yeah, when I'm year six, I'll give it a go. Yeah. What year are you now? Year four.

It happens every two years. Does it? Yeah. Do you know what the next production will be, have they said? No. No, okay. Or anything could happen.

They could do Hamilton. Yeah. Or Troilus and Cressida. I think the rights might be a bit much for primary school. Yeah, the rights might be a bit expensive too. Oh, right. They're not up yet. Yeah, no.

Right. Priscilla Point of the Desert. I think the rights are up for that. Yeah, that'd be a good one. For local production. It's an easy step though because then you go, what year?

Year six? It starts year two, year four, year six. And then you're year eight. Then you go to high school and that's where it gets really serious. Then you go to drama school

like I did, Max, and you have to roll around on the floor for three years and pay $40,000 to do that. Jeez. Yeah, I know, Max. Don't do that, Max. I don't know, Mum.

Don't do that. I have to know, Mum. Don't do that. I have to say my parents did chip in, so Mum might have to help out on that one. And then you're off into your career as a famous actor, I reckon. Yeah. Is that what the future holds, or have you got another job in mind for when you grow up? No, when I grow up,

I'm thinking to either work for my dad's business or become one of you guys. One of us. Oh, yes. This industry will be well dead by the time you're ready. Radios at Diamantium X, run. Yeah, you listen to it and you alone. Well, thanks for coming up.

It's been great to have you in the studio. It's been so fun talking with you guys. Well, I doubt this is going to be the last time either. No, heck no. Following your journey with great interest and in two years' time, don't be afraid to go for that bigger part. You've got the chops.

True. I reckon it could be Aladdin. Yeah. If it's Aladdin. Maybe not Aladdin. How do you make a carpet fly in a school hall? On a skateboard. Okay, right. Problem solved. Skateboarding on a leaf blower underneath to make the carpet fly in a school hall? On a skateboard.

Okay, right. On himself. Skateboard and a leaf blower underneath to make the carpet, like, jiggle and wiggle a little. Maybe he could be Bert and Mary Poppins. Can you do a good Cockney accent? Like, hello, Mary? Nah. Yeah, give it two years.

Give it two years. Give it two years, but accent-wise. Yeah, Max, thank you so much for coming in. It's an amazing experience with you guys. Thank you so much. Aw, Max. Anytime. Anytime, our friend.

Now, yesterday after work on the way home, I popped into my tent. I'm sure we've got something more interesting to talk about. I'm pretty sure we'll cover this. What else have we got? What else is on the sheet? I needed a couple of things. That's what I say when I just want to stop in and see what I need. Okay.

Find something that I need. And I was heading towards the plumbing department. I rounded the corner into the aisle with the latches and hinges on it. Yeah. And window catches, et cetera. Yeah. And who do I come face to face with? None other than Hayley Jane Sproul, who yesterday had a sick day.

Wait, so after the show would have been about what, 10? Yeah, I think it was 10, 10.30. 10.30am? Between 10 and 10.30. Wow, okay. We're just like moments ago when you were at work. Yes, that's correct. Yeah, right, okay.

Look, what I have is not contagious, and it's not even that bad. It's just painful. So I did go out, and I ran some errands. I also went to a cooking class last night. Wow, I had a big full day of that sick day. I had a productive day. Yeah, it was actually good not coming to work, because I got to get up around about 7 and start painting the house.

Right. So it was really good to start painting the house. Right. So it was really, it was good to just not be here. Right. So you had a sick day and did... Well, I'm not, I wasn't, I'm not sick. I just have a throat infection that's very painful when I swallow. But not, well, I sound

okay. It's very sore. Very, very sore. Right. It's sore. It's sore to talk. A little bit more, a little bit more toy ficado there. A little bit more acting school. I want you to feel about how much you paid to go to the acting school and then put that pain into the film. Yeah, like that.

I did. I was out and about. It was so good when I walked around the corner and I was like, man, that girl looks like Hayley. And then she looked at me like, and I was like, ha ha, it is. Busted. looks like Hayley and then she looked at me like and I was like haha it is busted I was recommended by the doctor that I paid

$150 to go and see because it was a weekend emergency to have a sick day to have a little to rest the voice

I understand I get that if you've got a sore throat this is a throat heavy industry one of a few I can't think of any other industry quite as throat heavy as. One of a few. I can't think of any other industry quite as throat heavy as this industry.

You're not wrong. You need your throat. Opera singing. Opera singing, yes. Radio. And rock concerts. Rock concerts. Singers.

Rock concerts. Yeah, Dave Grohl, he has a Monday off every now and then. Yeah, and he still pops down to the Mitre 10. Yeah, he pops down to a Mitre 10. I need some window latches. He doesn't need to sing at Mitre 10, does he? No.

No, exactly. And I thought I was going to make it out of there without having a conversation, just resting the vocal cords. Ballsy, though, on a sick day, to be out running chores and going to a cooking class as well. My builder said this to me as I was leaving.

He was like, aren't you pulling a sickie? And I said, well, no, I've got this throat infection. He was like, yeah, but people are going to see you and know who you are. Yeah, because there are rules to having a sick day. You're not allowed to leave. I mean, you go to the pharmacy or the supermarket, absolutely. Don't go to a Japanese cooking class and not attend to get

window latches. No, or do painting. But the windows don't have latches. What are we going to do about it? Yeah. You know? Off the pub. You can't go down the pub. I didn't go to the pub. Didn't go to the pub. I love when people get busted on a sick day, and this is what I want to open up the phone lines to now.

When did you get busted on a sick day? Was it by a workmate in a hardware store? Was it in the crowd at a sports match? Was it in the back of a news broadcast? Oh, yeah, that's good. Maybe you were just being as productive as heck. Yeah. Making the most of a news broadcast? Oh yeah, that's good. Maybe you were just being as productive as heck. Yeah.

Making the most out of your sick day. God, I did. I undercoated two whole rooms. Well done. I mean, I think if you can undercoat

and go to a Japanese cooking club. Oh, okay, mum. The vocal cords. Mum's here. Mum's weighing in with a little... If you're good enough

to undercoat a room, you can be at work. I've got throat infection. I'm antibiotics. Well, we enough to come to work. I've got a throat infection. I'm antibiotics. Well, we want to take your calls. 0800 DARS at M. Text as well, 9696. When did you get busted on a sick day?

Where were you? What were you doing? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Ten minutes away from eight. Well, yesterday, Hayley was busted at Mitre 10 while having a sick day. I have a non-contagious throat infection that requires vocal rest.

Actually, I'm actually at 750. I'm running out. Somebody said the absolute key to never getting busted on a sick day is not living in the same town that you work in. Brilliant. I mean, your commute's a little rough. Brilliant. Am I supposed to go to like Mitre 10 Whangarei or something?

I listened to a podcast with a teacher And the teacher's like Never live in the town you teach You can't get away with anything Yeah because the kids would see you everywhere Yeah It was on Conan O'Brien's podcast And this teacher got busted

The first week that she started at a new school She was living in the area And she shopped at a mall And walked into three students outside She'd just been to Victoria's Secret. Her sexy bars. And then she got back to school on Monday

and everyone was talking about her sexy knickers. So I remember the history Ted, she got busted going into the video Easy Adults Only section. See, you can't live in the same,

I mean, you don't need to go into the, good luck finding a curtained off area in any video store, let alone a video store. Yeah, well he maintained he was looking for

World War II movies to show in class. Which aren't appropriate for kids, so sometimes they're behind the curtain. Exactly, because of the Nazis. Before we go and blow up a Nazi base, how about we take off our clothes? That's my World War II pornography.

Some messages in. I took a sick day to volunteer to build a patrol tower for my local surf life-saving club that I'm involved in. And I ended up rescuing a boy from the surf and ending up in the local newspaper. Hero, volunteer hero, takes day off, saves life. How can you be in trouble?

Yeah, you can't be. How can you be in trouble? I mean, but that's right up there with Hayley going on a cooking class. To a cooking class on a sick day. No, that is hero because I'm going to make you a beautiful agarashi tofu next time you come around. No, I don't want tofu. Now you're the villain. Alright, keep

your texts coming in. 9696 0800 dials at M. Get to your calls next. We want to know when you were busted on a sick day, like Hayley was yesterday at Mitre 10. Trina, good morning. Good morning. When were you busted having a sick day? Well, it was a little while ago now, but when I was in my early 20s, I had an office job

and I had a sick day from that. But I also had a part-time waitressing job and I kind of felt okay in the afternoon. I thought, go to work. Go to a second job. So I did. And then my boss turned up and sat at one of my tables, so I had to serve her. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, that's not a good look, is it? No, no. Did you get in trouble?

Oh, yeah, yeah. She gave me the death stare like nothing else, and I'm like, I'm feeling better now. And, yeah, it wasn't a pleasant shift at all. And then the next day at work, she pulled me into an office and gave me a right rule of bollocking for going to my other job when I was sick for her job.

You see, Hayley, this is how there are repercussions. But I found out later on, I didn't know much then, I was pretty young, I found out later on that it was actually okay because it was outside of the hours of my normal job. Oh, okay. My daytime job. Yeah, you're entitled to do what you want.

So it was in my private time. I can do what I want in my private time. Wow, okay. Trina, thanks for your call. Olivia, when were you busted having a sickie? I was busted having a sickie because I called him on a Saturday and we're heading around to my parents and then ended up coming across some protesters

and flipped on the bird but then rear-ended a car at the same time. Oh, dear. Oh, dear. No. Not my finest moment. Right, and so how did they know, though, that you had a crash? I got interviewed by staff. Right.

So you ended up on the news, basically. Basically. Yeah. Got pulled into the office following Monday. It wasn't too good. Oh, no. See, Hayley, all these repercussions. Yeah, lots of repercussions.

Paige, when were you busted pulling a sickie? Hi, guys. So it wasn't me. Isn't that what we all say? Yeah, sure, sure, sure. I used to work on a farm, and it was shared accommodation. And the girl that I lived with, nobody really liked her that much, to be totally honest.

But she said she hurt her hand, and she couldn't carry on milking the cows and stuff. So the boss sent her home and then we noticed that after the boss had left the shed, had noticed that one of the contracting boys had pulled up in our driveway and we managed to finish milking early and we got home and she was busy having hanky panky. Panky. Panky. Yeahy? Panky? Yeah. It might have just been a throat infection though. Could have just been a throat infection. You said you've been quite good to do other things.

Yeah, I've been fine doing other things. It's just vocal rest. Might have been the other hand too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Could have been. Yeah, true. Paige, thanks. You caught a couple of text messages. I got busted at Hamner Springs. I was only not only was I busted but I was in my togs

face to face with a work colleague who was in a senior position to me. Oh no. Oh no. That's juicy. Pool based.

Somebody else was like, back in the days of why we were at a hot springs. I was there and I was just having a great old time and then a manager

was looking at me and I pulled a sickie to get out of work that day. Why were they there though? Was it after hours? Yeah, I don't know. I took a sick day because I out of work that day. Why were they there though? Was it after hours? Yeah, I don't know. I took a sick day because I wanted to go to the chocolate factory. This is from Charlie Bucket.

Did they win the golden ticket? They must have. And on the tour of the chocolate factory, my manager was on the same tour of the chocolate factory. What are the chances? A friend went to the horse racing with another friend who had a share in a horse.

The horse won, so they got to go to the winner's circle and then the picture was in the paper and it was all over work and they came back in the next day. Went to the beach, pulled a sickie, went to the beach,

got very badly sunburned. Oh, yeah, you go to work and you're all red. Tried to lie and say I was having an allergic reaction to the medicine I got at the doctor's, but I didn't really buy it. Especially two days later when you tan up quite well.

Yeah, you bronze right up. Yeah, meds don't do that, do they? Yeah. Somebody said, I'm a teacher. Called in sick. Jumped on a flight to the other island. On the flight, the principal was off to a principal's convention. I love this.

Have we learned anything from this? Yeah, I want to go to the islands. Play ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Play ZM. Fletchvorn and Hayley's Monday Maestros. Well, we've set the task for Monday Maestros to bring on the show, each of us, the most famous person we could find. This is, I really enjoyed this task because it really made me think.

I was going through my phone for a while. It's a bit empty in here. A bit void. Right, okay. And then I remembered I had a connection to Hollywood and I utilised it. And now you're going to utilise that next. I'm going to go first and then Vaughn is going to go third. Oh, headlining, are you?

It's the way it's been drawn. Yeah. Look at this smug little you're up to something. What have you done? What have you done? We'll see. I would like to welcome, now we have had this person on the show previously,

I would like to welcome to the show, Jeremy Irvine, who... Holy shoot! Friend of the show. He started his career as a horse in Steven Spielberg's War Horse. He played a horse, I believe, and was nominated for several awards for the horse. Yeah, Horse of the Year. Horse of the Year.

At the annual Horse Awards. Yes. He's been in several movies and TV shows, including, and Carl Wayne at the social media desk now, the executive producer was fizzing when she learned that he was in Mamma Mia. Weren't you, Carl Wayne? Guys, you're embarrassing me. Mamma Mia, here we go again.

Jeremy Irvine, good morning. Welcome to the show. Good morning. Thanks for disappointing every single one of your listeners. No. You've got a blue tick on Instagram, Jeremy. You're famous. I've got a blue tick,

but the only people I'm famous with in the whole of New Zealand are a redneck called Vaughn and Fletch. And they're the only people that know me. I've actually got the pip with you. Oh. Oh, yeah? Because Hamish and Andy went to England and Jeremy showed them a bloody grand old time.

Oh, look at me with Andy Lee. I was like, you remember who your original bloody Down Under podcastians were, please? I know. I've had a bit of a weird... Well, actually... Oh, God, I hate to disappoint you. I think I've known them longer than you guys.

Get out of here. Oh, wow. Hang up on him. Hang up on him. I hate to disappoint you. I think I've known them longer than you guys. Get out of here. Oh, wow. Hang up on him. Hang up. I know. I know. I know. I'm actually talking to...

Oh, go on. Go on. Are you about to flag off another of my movies? Absolutely not. I came on your show to promote, I think, Malamir 2, and then I remember listening to the podcast a few weeks later and just hearing an absolutely slating from Fletch. Well, it wasn't my kind of movie, but I did, I mean, it was silliest.

And this is what I wanted to get you on the show for, because you must know some really famous people that we could get on to boost this up. Oh, here we go. So what, you got him on the phone to play middleman to a more famous? And the real reason, the real reason for getting me on comes on. Here we go. Mamma Mia.

You just... I mean, Piers Brosnan, Meryl Streep, Cher, Colin Firth. Amanda Seyfried. Amanda Seyfried. You must have some numbers. Aren't you good friends with Dua Lipa? No, I'm not friends with Dua Lipa. I thought you were.

I must have got my wires crossed, Jeremy. That's an in-joke that we're not going to share with you. Oh, no. I don't know this, Jeremy. Please continue.

Hang on. So you've got me on purely to raise my contacts on my phone. Even though you're probably my... Actually,

I've only got two fans in New Zealand. You're one of them, and you don't even like my film. That's rude, eh? No, no, Jeremy, three. I'm here as well. I'm a big fan. Thanks, Hayley. Thanks, Carwin.

Yeah, there's a few fans here. I asked Pierce Brosnan for his number at the Miami Rat Party because I thought we were getting on pretty well. I think I got a fakey. Did he get a fakey? He gave you a fake number? He gave you a fake number? Does it not go through

to anything? It was so ridiculous. I mean, it was just so many digits and none of them... He actually got like 849-777-332-1234-56. He doesn't know you've got like an49-777-332-123456.

He doesn't know you've got like an amazing memory, but... Well, I think I was a bit of a pest with him. Who is the most famous person's number that you have on your phone? We're not going to piss them. We won't piss them. You'll do. This sounds like making me ripe for an iCloud hack, doesn't it? Yeah.

Do you not have two factor on? I chat to a guy called Vaughan Smith every now and again. We talk farming. Yeah. Well, I don't actually know, Jeremy, but your Wikipedia, your actual last name is Smith. And Vaughan was a little offended that you didn't take that as a screen name, but I said it's very plain. Yeah, Jeremy Smith.

It is. Yeah. Yeah, it's boring. Yeah. Yeah, see, I take that as a screen name, but I said it's very plain. Yeah, Jeremy Smith. It is. Yeah. Yeah, it's boring. Yeah, see, I've got an exciting first name, so the Smith balances it out nicely. Yes. Yeah, it does. Well, Jeremy, thank you so much.

That's my... My pleasure. And I hope things get better from here on. No. I'm genuinely shocked that Fletch... Usually, Jeremy, Fletch absolutely phones these in, to be fair. Uh-huh. He's done well to that.

Also, can I just say, Jeremy is currently at the pub that was in hot fuzz. Oh, I see. I am. Isn't that the most English thing you've ever heard? That's so British. What are you drinking? Are you having a pint? I'm having a pint of, do you know Jeremy Clarkson?

Yes. I'm having a pint of his lager. They should pay me for that, shouldn't they? God, that is so British. You're at the hot fuzz pub drinking Jeremy Clarkson's lager. I know. Very British. Jeremy, it's so great to have you on the show again.

It's a pleasure as always. Thanks so much. Thank you so much. Love you guys. Bye. Take care. See you soon. Bye always. Thanks so much. Thank you so much. Love you guys. Bye. Bye. Take care. See you soon.

Bye now. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. All right. So. Hey, Carwin.

Hey, it's your turn. Jeremy said love you. Carwin's blushing. I think that extends to the whole group. Carwin, be professional, please. And you're not allowed to save these numbers that you get. Okay. I know you're new to this role.

Now, look, Jeremy was a great get. I'm not going to lie. I'm impressed. However, you're not new to this role. Now, look, Jeremy was a great get. I'm not going to lie. I'm impressed. However, you're not going to believe this. So I went through my New Zealand slabs and I was like, you know, sorry, Madeline's Army, but no one cares. Wow. No, I'm kidding.

I love you. I love you. And then I remembered that Aaron worked on an American production and was very close with one of the producers. So I said, do you think that you would be able to contact this American producer and get hold of one of her friends who we knew was a friend? And Aaron was like, please don't make me do this. And then we had a fight and then I made him do it.

Yeah. And it's happened. So I would like to welcome to the show one of my favourite actresses. She's just won a bloody Golden Globe. Miss Jennifer Coolidge. What? Good morning, Jennifer. Hello?

Hi. Hello. Hi. Welcome to the show, Jennifer Coolidge. Hi, thank you so much. I'm loving White Lotus. Yeah, we're loving White Lotus season two. Yeah, yeah.

How did it feel to just win a Golden Globe for your performance? Look, I mean, it was amazing. Yeah, okay, yeah. Okay, good. Short film. I think it's all for an events program. Hang on, Jennifer. So obviously one of your more famous roles is Stifler's mum.

Do you still get called Stifler's mum? All the time. Wow. It's like constant everywhere I go. And, of course, the bend and snap from Legally Blonde. What's your favourite role you've had so far? I would say probably... I knew this was a fake!

She's just a lovely bubbly. Okay, Jennifer, I've just googled your Wikipedia. What's your date of birth? What month? I'm a Sagittarian. You're using an acting friend to try and pull the wool over the nation. You've got to set her up to deliver some famous Jennifer Coolidge quotes. What's one of your famous quotes, Jennifer?

Wow, you look like the 4th of July. Okay, you know what you get? Oh my God, it's Jennifer Corley. Did this person also pay $40,000 to go to an acting school? Yes. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome my friend Johanna Cosgrove. Hi. Johanna, thank you so much.

You were very great because for a moment I was like, oh, my God, you've actually got Jennifer Coolidge on the show. You were doing well, babe. You know what? It's because I couldn't do it without laughing and I'm sitting in my car just pretending to be Jennifer Coolidge and absolutely losing it. The person that can see me is like, what is going on?

Oh, look, we stuck in there for a while. There's something very Kiwi about that car that drove past at the start of the conversation as well.

I was like, no, no. We know it's a carol. It's giving Toyota carol. We can hear it. We can hear it. Amazing. All right, well, next.

Thank you, Jennifer Coolidge. Yeah, Monday Maestro is next, Vaughn. You're going to finish up for us. Yes. And you're promising a big Hollywood actor here. Correct. The biggest.

Well, not the biggest but big. He's a big deal. Like everybody knows Everybody will know this guy. Okay. Everybody in Hollywood is

connected to this guy. Hard to beat Jennifer Coolidge though. Fletch Vaughan and Hayley's Monday Maestros. It's been great so far. Jeremy Irvine. Jennifer Coolidge. Your friend from acting school.

Jennifer Coolidge. Doing a Jennifer Coolidge impression. But Monday Maestros was to get the most famous person we could on the phone. Yes. Delayed to Tuesday, and it took a little bit of wrangling. But no one stipulated in the rules that we weren't allowed to take advantage of promotional activity dropped at our feet. Oh, what? Now, my friends at Disney Plus said the Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas special comes out

on Friday. Would you like to talk to one of the stars of it? And I said, yes, I certainly would. And they said, would Kevin Bacon do? What? Joining us on the phone, ladies and gentlemen, Kevin Bacon. Hello, Kevin Bacon. Hi, Kevin Bacon.

Hello. Hi, how are you doing? I love the way you're using both my first and my last name. You are worthy of a first and last name. And a first and last name. We only just met. By the end of this, I want to be calling you Kev. There you go.

Kev is fine. Kev. Kev. Kev. We're big supporters of Ukraine. Kev. Kev. Well, you are in the Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas special,

joining the MCU as yourself, which is a very rare... I don't think anybody else has joined the MCU as themselves yet. I don't know. Is that true? Okay. Well, then I'm happy with that. You're a leader in it. Before joining, did you have a favorite superhero growing up

that you quite liked from the comics or ones from the recent movies? Oh, wow. You know, I mean, I like them all, but I mean, I have to say that I'm really thrilled to be part of the Guardians universe because I love the Marvel movies. I especially like the Marvel movies that are kind of fun

and don't take themselves too seriously. And that's what this kind of side of things in the Guardians of the Galaxy is. And I was name-dropped in the first Guardians movie, and it happened... I didn't know anything about it. I went to see Guardians opening weekend, just like I would, because it was coming out,

and it was a cool movie, and, you know, I read the reviews and wanted to go see it, and I sat there, and all of a sudden, they're talking about me. You can imagine how weird that is. It was kind of an out-of-body experience. Do you feel like you were just saying that? I called my wife.

Do you feel, though, we were saying before, we're looking at your social media. I've been a follower for a long time, big fan. But it looks like you're just having so much fun at this stage in your career and your life. I can see a guitar behind you. You've had such an amazing career that's spanned all decades. Now, when something fun like this comes up, is that what's cool about where you're at now? As you can just say, hell yeah, I want to do something kind of

silly and fun. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. And I've made a career, mostly, a lot of it has been based on doing really dramatic stuff and, you know and some pretty heavy kind of things. So to do something that is just silly, to make fun of myself, to make fun of actors and our self-involvement and the size of our egos is just, it's great. So when you were asked, there was no hesitation then. You were like, yes, I, Kevin Bacon, will play Kevin Bacon on this intergalactic space journey movie

that's also a Christmas special. Yep. There was no, not only was there no hesitation, there was no hesitation having never read the script. I said, yes, absolutely, without even taking a look at the script I knew what James' kind of sensibility was and

I knew that it was going to be fun and I was all in What do you look for when you get sent something because you always surprise me like I sort of went I love Kevin in these roles, as you say these dramatic roles and then I watched I Love Dick which is one of my favourite can I even say I watched I Love Dick, which is one of my favorite.

Can I even say that on radio? I Love Dick is one of my favorite TV shows of recent years. It is so freaking good. And it's so different. Not saying that you don't ever play a sexy role because the character is very sexy. But you're like this like country cool kind of guy. And now you're playing yourself. You play comedy roles.

Like what is it that kind of entices now you're playing yourself you play comedy roles like what is it that kind of entices you into a character well i think you said it uh which was you like it that i surprise you um i like to surprise myself you know i like to um do something that is i mean i became an actor so that i could walk in different people's shoes and And to be a character like the guy in I Love Dick and then do something completely different, you know, someone that's from a different world completely. You look at a guy like that and he barely, he doesn't talk very much, you know?

And then to do a character that just can't shut up. You know, I love to just keep it fresh. That's why I became an actor and I feel so grateful to be able to do that. You know, that was the career that I wanted and that was the career that I got. Well, I can't wait to see what you do next. I also can't wait to hear your next Taylor Swift cover

because I'm loving the cover you've done with your daughter on Instagram. It's bloody good. You're a legend, Kevin Bacon. First and last name. Or just Kev now. Oh, it's Kev.

Thank you so much. Yeah, we're Kev. We're Kev. Thanks so much for your time. I appreciate it. It's a pleasure talking to you folks. The Guardians of the Galaxy

holiday special 25th of November, so this week. That's going to be on Disney+. Yeah, Friday on Disney+. And you'd have to say we now have one degree of Kevin Bacon. You'd have to say Vaughn won that one. Well, you won that one. That's going to be on Disney+. Yeah, Friday on Disney+. And you'd have to say we now have one degree of Kevin Bacon.

You have to say Vaughn won that one. Well, you won that one. That's a win for you, Vaughn. I exploited my resources. Yup. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley. Well, an airline in the UK,

EasyJet, that's the orange one, isn't it? Yes. Remember there was a TV show? Oh, yeah. Remember when that was on? I loved that show. Yeah, all the Brits would be complaining. Airport chaos, people paying a pound for a flight and then having a meltdown when it was two minutes late.

Yeah. So they've done a study and they've asked people if they'd rather go away with their loved ones or their friends. I would go my... I've holidayed with both friends. Yeah. And just Aaron. Yeah. And Aaron and friends.

I'd probably go just with Aaron because you're so comfortable and, you know, like we share money and everything's kind of easy. There's no like, you get this one, I'll get that one. Yeah. Well. Nude all the time'll get that one. Yeah. Nude all the time. 72% sex. Yeah, how good is nude all the time? I spend a lot of the weekend nude.

Just endless. Yeah. No, it's too hot. It's too hot. And you're too hungover. You've just eaten. I'm too full. I'm so full of food on holiday.

So 72% would rather Jennifer Broad for a two-week sunshine vacation with their friends and not their lover. So a so-called makecation is more popular with... Women, I reckon. Men. Yeah. 78% compared to 65% of women. That's still a lot, though. Yeah.

I'm too old for an all-lads trip for too long. No, but you just go with your lads. You don't go with lads. No,'t want to. I'm too old for an all lads trip for too long. No, but you just go with your lads. You don't go with lad lads. No, no, no. I know you go with lads, but pieces of shit as well. I don't know. That's why I married Sade. She's the person that I believe I can be with forever.

Oh. Whereas your mates, you get sick of them after a little while. So many hours in the week. And then you're just like, I've had enough of you. Well, you're in the minority here. So they asked people why they'd rather go with their friends. 43% said it's less stressful than going with a partner. Nearly a third always argue with their partner overseas.

Oh, yeah. What's a holiday overseas? Isn't that a good argument over something really dumb that you can look back at later on and not admit you were wrong? A bicker, right? A little bicker of, a stressful bicker of, not admit you were wrong? A bicker, right? A little bicker of, a stressful bicker of, where's the bloody transfer? Yeah, yeah.

I thought you were organising it. I didn't. You said, just wait here. So 45% of people said they felt they could let their hair down more with their mates than when they're with their partner. Oh, interesting. Just weird if you can't let your hair down with your partner, right? You've got to get a fine partner. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, I think you've got to find, like, it's... That just sounds to me like guys want to go away and hook up with other chicks. That's their idea of letting their hair down. Yeah, pretty much, yeah. I agree. Not that I don't want to do that on a holiday. You know what I mean?

Let your hair down. Let my hair down. Kiss the ladies. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. I was tempted. I'm watching you.

You know when you're walking down the street and you're like, maybe I will. Maybe I'll go to the clubs. Kiss in the clubs. That's not what that means. You know when you're in Thailand and you're walking down the street and they go...

That's not what that means. That's not what that means. No. And they go That's not what that means That's not what that means Play ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley Play ZM I actually didn't know they were still dating Because I thought Wasn't there rumours that Harry Styles and Olivia Wilde Were like not that close at the premieres of something

And body language was off Because he spat on Chris Pine He spat on someone That was a wild time, wasn't it? We've forgotten about that. It was wild. Yeah. Well, it was Olivia Wilde.

I hate myself. We live here in wild times. Let's stop. Ted Lasso will be happy, though. Jason Sudeikis. No, but he wants nothing to do with her either. Yeah. Anyway, they've broken up. Officially. Harry and that

movie was rubbish, right? Everybody said it was rubbish. Yeah, so they're over. Officially over. And he's an eligible bachelor once again. Obviously very devastating for him. Yeah. But not for too long. He was very shortly after spotted

looking at a half a million dollar Ferrari. Wow. It's a Ferrari 812 Superfast at the Ferrari dealership in Beverly Hills on Sunday. Most of us would just get a big tub of ice cream. That's the stereotypical thing to do. A Ben and Jerry's. Yeah, exactly. A big, some lollies, some chocolate.

Some track pants. Yep. Some rom-coms. Some shower for a week. you just don't leave the house for a week. It's going to cost you 50 bucks in junk food. Yeah. Whereas he was looking at a $500,000

Ferrari. Wow. I mean, would that soothe the pain? It would help. What better place to cry than in a half a million dollar Ferrari? Too low. Yes, sir.

I'd scrape it going into Westfields. Yeah, you would. I don't think Harry Styles is going to Westfields. It's Westfield. I just love saying Westfields. I love how this is really pluralising Westfield. Westfields. You're right, though.

I think they would be a bit low for a Westfield. A bit low. Yeah, we've got a lot of speed bumps. You know, we're a very speed bumpy nation. We don't suit ourselves to a low Ferrari. I don't understand. I've always found these sort of sports cars on the road strange because the speed limit's 50.

So you can get to 50 quickly, but then it's 50. And also in New Zealand especially, if you drive an expensive car, everyone turns their nose up at you and says, who do you think you are? Yeah. Which is a wang thing. It's a wang thing. Must have a small wang.

What was the fancy car down in the garage? We had a photo shoot with it. Oh, that was a Lamborghini. That's the other thing Kiwis do. If there's a fancy car like a Lamborghini or a Ferrari or whatever, you sit on it and you have a photo. Yeah. Someone knows that I was at my gym.

It's upstairs and you park downstairs and you can see your car and there was some youths and they went to BK and then when they came out, one of them like leant on the car and one of them like, and they had a photo shoot with my car. I'm like. Your chimney. Yeah. So there's some kids out there with some photos of my chimney.

Wow. They were obviously taking those ironically, weren't they? Yeah, no one does that with my gray Mazda. Oh my God, I hadn't even considered that. Was it an irony photo shoot? Look at me,

look at me, I'm a dumb middle-aged guy having an identity crisis. Look at me, I'm a 20-year-old girl from the North Shore. Okay, let's go back

to the day you took delivery of the Suzuki Jimny. Yeah. You were so ecstatic. Oh, shit, I felt great, man. That's the first new car I've ever purchased. Yeah, imagine if that had been right after a breakup.

Would that have helped? It'd erase it. It'd go a bit of a distance, you know? Mine's always like a big boozy night out with the girls. Yeah. But haven't been dumped in a while. Here's hoping that doesn't happen soon. Still waiting for that wedding, though, aren't you?

Yeah, oh goodness gracious me. Now we want to know what was your purchase that helped you get over a breakup? Maybe you went out and got yourself a new set of boobs. You know what I mean? Was it a one-way ticket out of the country? One-way ticket out of the country. Bought yourself a house, got yourself

a shopping spree. Bought a dog. Yeah. Bought a dog. Maybe you bought a dog. Maybe a pet would help because a shopping spree, bought a dog. Yeah. Bought a dog. Maybe you bought a dog. Maybe a pet would help because a dog would take your mind off things. Absolutely. And, you know, be your best friend. But not for ages.

Yeah. Well, that's what they say. People buy pets on whims all the time. Yeah, yeah, an emotional pet purchase and then a few years later they're like, oh, now I want a twavel. I thought a husky would look like a wolf. I thought a husky would be a nice chilled animal that didn't drop all its fur over my furniture. All right, well, 0800DARLS.M, give us a call.

Text as well, 9696. I doubt it's a $500,000 Lamborghini or Ferrari. Hey, if it is, call us. But what purchase helped you get over a breakup? Harry Styles was going to buy a Lamborghini to make him feel better after his breakup from Olivia Wilde. So we want to know what purchase you made after getting dumped or doing the dumping even. Yeah, what cheered you up?

That made you feel better, yeah. Somebody said a dual-pleasure vibrato. Oh, yeah. That's an instrument, isn't it? Yes, it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Percussion. Someone said Tinder premium was the little thing I shouted myself.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Someone said tattoos. Oh, okay. Yeah, classic. Someone says a little tattoo. My missy mini, I don't know what that means, but it's followed by the hashtag, if you know, you know. So one can assume that's... I bought a project car, something to work on, take my mind off it, keep my hands busy.

Yeah. Bit of hobby? Yeah, travel, one-way ticket out of the country. Someone did. Yeah. Well, you just changed the busy. Yeah. Okay. Bit of hobby? Yeah. Travel? One-way ticket out of the country? Someone did. Yeah. Well, you'd just change the location. Yeah.

Find some new hotties. Yeah. All right, well, keep your texts coming in. We want to know what you purchased to help you get over a breakup. Harry Styles has been seen test driving a, what, a $500,000 Lambo? Ferrari. Ferrari. I mean, that's...

Fast car? Hot car? Sexy car? That'll help. I mean, that's the equivalent of a Suzuki Swift for him, isn't it? Yeah. I also don't think that Harry Styles needs anything to be sexier, but maybe he's feeling a little bit down in the dumps. He did buy that ugly house. Remember that ugly house by the sea?

Oh my god, yeah, from Grand Designs. Yeah. Which was, like, named like, UK's ugliest house. Oh yeah, and it's gonna fall into the ocean. Rebecca, what did you buy to get over a breakup? Hi. Hello. Hi.

Hi. What did you purchase to get over the heartbreak? I dwelled for a little while, and then I went and booked myself in for a boob job. Yeah, girl. And then I bought like the cutest bulldog puppy I could find. Oh, wow. Boobs and a bulldog.

And did that help with the pain? Oh, definitely. Wow. Yeah, both those things combined were definitely well worth the money. Do you know if he noticed the new tatas? The what? The bulldog. Did he notice the bulldog? No, did he notice the new boobies?

Oh, he was trying to get back with me, so he was telling everybody it was his as well. Oh, the bulldog. Oh, right. Yeah, right. Okay, wow. Okay, Rebecca, thanks for your call. Some messages in to finish. I bought a Porsche because he'd always wanted a Porsche and he cheated on me.

So I bought a Porsche and then I put a picture of it on my Tinder profile because I knew how much, knew that it would sit on there and then he liked it. Oh, that would annoy me. Yeah. We'd been saving for a house, but it turns out he hadn't wanted to pull the trigger on buying one because he was going to break up with me.

So when he left, I bought the house by myself. I know he'll never own a house, so that was great satisfaction. Oh, wow. Yeah, I bought James Blunt's first album and listened to it on loop. It's got his boobs and bulldogs and houses and Porsches. It's supposed to make you feel better.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, James Blunt sometimes does that for me. Makes you feel better. Yeah. Not his songs though. It's like his witty repertoire. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, another podcast in the bag. The plastic bag. Are they back? No, no, still banned. Okay. They never left. No, sorry. That's where you come in with the line, boy. Boy, man, no, still banned. Okay. They never left. No, sorry. That's where you come in with the line, Bourne.

Boy, man, if you enjoyed that. Okay. Oh, and if you enjoyed it, give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell all of your friends. God, I need some sleep. Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.