ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 24th March 2023

Episode Date: March 23, 2023

Silly Little Poll!  Top 6: Celeb Locomotives  Vaughan & Jared are doing some Charity  Final Rankings: Hangover Drinks  Lizzo!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, good morning, welcome to the show Fletch Vaughan and Hayley, happy Friday. Hello. Lizzo is on the show after 8 o'clock this morning. Personal friend. Lizzo. Just announced her show a couple of days ago. Exciting.

Coming to New Zealand Spark Arena in July. We'll catch up with her at 8 o'clock this morning. We've just found out Hayley doesn't like Feejellers. Yeah. Vaughan's got a huge bag. Brought in a lot of Feejellers. They're hard. They're going to need a couple of days in the banana bowl.

Oh, yep. And then they'll be right and ready to go, the old Feej. Oh, I'm going to take home a heap of those. As many as can fit in my bag. I can sense them in the room. That makes me want to leave. I think they're the most feral fruit. They're so yuck.

Have you had a bad experience with Fiji-O-ers? Yeah, when I was 16 I... Fiji-O-Vodka. Had absolute... No, no, absolutely. No, 42 below. 42 below Fiji-O-Vodka.

42 below put us all off a lot of Fiji-O-er there for a couple of years. They did, yeah. And I just ever since have not been able to handle them. I just think, oh, no. Wow. That's like me and Midori.

Midori. I can't do Midori. It just doesn't sit right. Yeah, I vomited green all over the carpet. You never forget these moments. No. And they change you as a human being. They do. So no Fiji- they change you as a human being. They do.

So no feature hours for you today on the show. Absolutely none, thank you. We've got the top six coming up. A train in, is it Switzerland? Or Austria? Yeah. It's around, it's in Europe. One of those happy countries. One of those happy places. They named their

train Shania Train. Now that's good stuff. She even, she's on board with this. There's a photo of her with Shania Twain. Yeah. Train. Shania Train. I have approximately 48 minutes to come up with the top six other celebrity transport name puns.

Fantastic. I'm excited for this. What about just train? The band. After the band Train. There's an easy one. That's an easy one. I think they've got to be celebrities.

Individual celebrities. What are you saying? Train haven't earned the right. I mean, Drops of Jupiter is a great song, absolutely. Oh my God, is it my Friday flashback? It is, yeah. Drops of Jupiter is a great song, absolutely. Oh my God, is it my Friday flashback? It is, yeah. Drops of Jupiter. Really?

I'd be burned to the stake. Not really a Friday bop. We're going to need a banger to take us to Lizzo. So, good luck. Back to you. You've got until 8 o'clock. Next on the show, you've listened to a podcast about this. Yeah, Ozempic?

Yeah. Is that what it's called? Ozempic? Ozempic? It's the weight loss injection drug that has taken Hollywood by storm. Now it's everywhere. And apparently, it's making its way to Aotearoa. Medsafe, who is New Zealand's sort of medicine regulation body.

It's Medsafe, they keep the medicine safe. They keep the medicine safe, they keep the people safe on the medicine. Yeah. They have given consent, they've approved the use of a Zempik in New Zealand. Now, a Zempik is a hype word at the moment because lots of celebs are being either accused of being on a Zempik, which is a drug specifically designed to help people with type 2 diabetes. Yes. Either being accused of it or admitted to using it.

Elon Musk was the big one. He lost like a ton of weight and everyone was like, how did you do it? He was like, it was Zempik. Yeah. And apparently Chelsea Handler is another one. And, you know, remember when with the Met Gala, with Kim Kardashian dropping all that way, a lot of people were like, yes, she didn't eat food.

Yeah. But she also would have got a little Zempik injection. So Zempik. How did it decide it? Ozempic. Ozempic. O-Z-E-M-P-I-C. So, I listened to a podcast the other day about ozempic,

and I'm not saying it's completely warranted. It can help people with type 2 diabetes. There's science behind it. It's not just like witchcraft. But one of the main reasons why people are losing weight on it is because it makes you feel so sick. It makes you so nauseous. Yeah, I'm just reading the side effects.

It sounds horrible. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you throw up, you shit yourself and you feel so nauseous you don't want to eat and then you're like, oh my god, miracle, I've lost weight. Vision changes. Kept any food. Mood changes. Pounding heartbeat or noticeable fluttering in chest.

A light-headed feeling like you might pass out. Signs of a thyroid tumour such as swelling or a lump in your neck, trouble swallowing, a hoarse voice, feeling short of breath. Signs, symptoms of pancreatitis, severe pain in your upper stomach spreading to your back, nausea with or without vomiting and a fast heart rate. Gallbladder problems, low blood sugar, kidney problems, swelling, urinating less, feeling tired or short of breath, stomach flu symptoms, stomach cramps, vomiting, loss of appetite,

diarrhea. I mean, to be fair, a lot of those side effects, they put as side effects of like every drug, right? Like nausea, diarrhea and all that kind of stuff. But so many people have been talking about experiencing these side effects, particularly the nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. People are like, oh, my God, it just makes you feel horrible. Or hence why people are saying they can lose a couple of kgs quickly.

Yeah, because you just poop it out. But then you're going to put that back on, right? 100%. Unless you keep taking this. Yeah, which, like, you wouldn't. You could inject yourself every day just to be skinny. Was this, like, obviously given to type 2 diabetics and then all of a sudden a lot of them were like,

oh my God, I'm losing all this weight as well. It was released into the market for type 2 diabetes like 13 years ago. Oh, wow. Like a long, long time ago. Right. And then obviously with type 2 diabetes, sometimes weight is an issue and losing weight, it gets really hard because of your insulin resistance. Yeah. So a lot of people need assistance to help manage type 2 diabetes, sometimes weight is an issue. And losing weight, it gets really hard because of your insulin resistance.

Yeah. So a lot of people need assistance to help manage type 2 diabetes with drugs, which is fine. But if you don't have type 2 diabetes and you're sort of like cashing in on a medicine, this happens all the time. They'd be like, oh, there's this heart medication that's really important for people with heart disease. But also if you take it, it gives you great skin. And then everyone's like on it. You know, I just find it so weird.

I don't feel like we should be taking medication that's not made for our issues. Also, do you have to inject this yourself? Yeah, it's like... Oh, no, no, no, no, no. It's the same type of needle as like an insulin shot. Yeah, so diabetics are used to injecting themselves. Yeah, yeah, into the tummy. Pinch the thing.

It doesn't hurt. But like, yeah, into the tummy. Yeah. Pinch the thing. It doesn't hurt. But like, yeah, I feel like. Wow. And now it's coming here. It's been approved. For type 2 diabetes or for general weight loss? Well, I think for type 2 diabetes. Right.

In 2020, a semaglutide, which is what the... So Ozempic is a brand name. Yes. Okay, right. So semaglutide was the 129th most commonly prescribed medicine in the United States. That was in 2020. Now, I've just found the list of the 50 most commonly... Oh, my God. The 50 most filled prescriptions in 2022.

Surely it's a penny. And this is in America. This is... It might be worldwide. Okay. God, I can't read it. It's just like looking at somebody's just pulled it, poured out the Scrabble water and just tipped out the letters. Yeah, serine, letipatine, and clemdamantine.

There'll be a lot of pennies on there because you get them free. Paracetamol. You get the big free paracetamols from the doctor. What's the other one? Antihistamines. Because antihistamines are expensive. No, it's not on the 50 most list. Cialis is 30.

Oh, okay. What's that? Stiffy pills. Yeah, boy. Yeah, boy. Get it, boy. I don't realise, I don't recognise any of these other ones. I just, I don't know.

Medicine? Oh, so number 24 is Viagra. Yeah. So that's two stiffy pills in the top 30. Yeah, I don't know. Medicine? Oh, so number 24 is Viagra. Yeah. So that's two stiffy pills in the top 30. Xanax at 12. I recognise that. That's like a anxiety. Antidepressant. Adderall

at six. Adderall! That's ADHD medication, right? I don't want to point this out, but Vaughan's brother would know this whole list. Would he? He probably will. He probably will. He's a pharmacist. Amoxicillin is the second most prescribed.

I know that that's a penicillin. Yeah. It's like an antibiotic penicillin. What's number one? Vitamin D. You can just buy that at the. You can go to bloody. Go to Fletch.

You'll give you a bloody prescription of vitamin D. Wink. Eh? You give out a few prescriptions of vitamin D, don't you? Oh, my God. Cheer. Wow. Retire.

That's your most... I'll give you a bit of vitamin D. That's your most filled script, isn't it, son? Oh, my God. You're not even a pharmacist. Ding. Next. Prescription ready.

Play. ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Moving in with a lover, a new partner. Big move. Have you ever, did you, because I've never lived with anyone else other than Aaron. Other than flatmates. I've never lived with a partner before. No, neither.

Nah. Nah. Fletch. Yep. Margaret. It's just Margaret. Gentilentry Margaret. Margaret.

Margaret was shockingly messy Oh Margaret's a slob She was such a beautiful Well presented woman Yeah Margaret doesn't exist Margaret's a slob Not anymore

She was a slob She was a pig Oh Now I think You've taken it a step too far Well I didn't mean to call Margaret a pig Wow

Maggie I'm sorry She doesn't exist Well she Well that's up for debate Yep That mess was mine Yeah pig. Wow. Maggie, I'm sorry. She doesn't exist. That's up for debate. Yep, that mess was mine. Yeah. Anyway, relationship therapists, couples therapists have been chiming in on the three questions, or the three sort of

topics of conversation you should have with a partner before you move in with them. Now my conversation was we're both broke and our lease is up. So this is a necessity. A sort of a necessity, before you move in with them. Now, my conversation was we're both broke and our lease is up. So this is a necessity. Sort of a necessity, yeah. Yeah, it kind of made sense at the time. Aaron's lease ran out.

He moved in with me and my friends at our flat. And then our lease ran out and we're like, well, I guess we'll just go together somewhere and it's cheaper and we can. And you've trapped him. Go halves on pasta. And you've trapped him. I'm going to marry this man. He tried to leave so many times.

Yeah, but he couldn't get out. Not today. Years later. Okay, so the number one is your expectations. Now, the relationship therapist says a lot of people's expectations when they first move in with someone are the same as what they've grown up with. And sometimes that's not good.

For example, if you lived in a household, say where your mother always had dinner ready for dad when he came home from work at 6pm. Yep. Is that your expectation of how this is gonna, this is gonna go in your flat with your partner? No, okay. Yeah, true.

So you have to set out your expectations. Now we're sharing a bed. We're gonna hump every day? Last one out of the, I was gonna say last one out of the bed makes it. Yeah, that should be a rule. And I've been wanting

to bring that up for some time. Dude, when you work, that's the one sweet thing about working mornings because even on the weekend, I always wake up before Sade. And I couldn't tell you

the last time I made the bed. Yeah. She's also a fussy little bed maker too. Yeah. Because I just go, flick. And I flick it a couple of times until it bed maker too. Because I just go flick. And I flick it a couple of times until it settles flat.

Because do you top sheet? Yeah. Yeah, we top sheet. Do we? You don't know if you top sheet? You must have a top sheet. I think in winter we top sheet and in summer we don't top sheet. Oh, yuck.

No, but in summer we just top sheet. You just top sheet. You don't? Wait, when did you get rid of the top sheet? I thought you were vehemently against just going raw dog on the duvet. When do we top sheet? I'll go straight raw dog on the duve. No, but how often are you washing your duve?

Quite often. Right. But you can't wash your duve too much. You don't wash your duve. The duve is itself the duve cover. It'll fade. Yeah, it'll fade. That's why you've got the top sheet to soak up your muck.

And then the duve remains protected. You can wash them monthly. Because that was the deal. That's why you've got the top sheet to soak up your muck. And then the duvet remains protected. You can wash that monthly. Because that was the deal. Your top sheet would become your bottom sheet, and then you'd wash your bottom sheet before the days of fitted sheets. I always remember my Nana telling me that. Every Friday she'd wash the bottom sheet, and the top sheet would become the bottom sheet.

Tuck it in. And you'd get a fresh top sheet. But for fitted sheets, what a disaster. Loose. Those old girls, they could get a tight corner. Oh, yeah. I can't do it. Yeah. Oh, but forfeited sheets, eh? What a disaster. Dude. Loose. Those old girls, they could get a tight corner. Oh, yeah. I can't do it. Nah. My nana, like, even when she was old and, like,

had arthritic hands, Christ, she could tuck a corner. Yeah. Oh, those hospital corners on sheets. It's a lost art. I've got a fitted sheet that is really fitted. Oh, real tight. I've got a thumb in the mattress. How do you do it by yourself? Oh, it's like... You've just got to use strength.

We're not one that's so tight it's a two-person operation. No, you've just got to use your strength. Oh, well done. Brute strength. Brute strength. Because I try to buy the sheets with the deep, the deep, you know.

You've got to. I've got a thick bed. Yeah. I've got to get it over there. Anyway, expectations, that's the first conversation. Number two, household roles. Ew.

So like, are you Are you the rubbish Lawnmower Dishwasher Handyman, painter guy Or before you move in, are we going to have a chore wheel So when you move in, we've got a chore wheel Are we going to go your chores, my chores

Or are we going to split the chores, we're going to do chores together Am I the cook Am I the chief cook and bottle washer? You've got to sort it out before you get in there. Yeah, it's an old saying. Chief cook and bottle washer. That's what I always want. I've never heard that in my life, Eva.

I think it's a song from my Broadway or something. Is it? Bottle washer. I've heard that term before. Chief cook and bottle washer. It's like a housewife. Yeah, but what bottles are you washing? The milk bottles? Yeah, all the bottles.

Oh, they're all milk bottles because they used to put them back out for the milkman. Yeah, chief cook and bottle washer. And you had to wash them otherwise they wouldn't take them, eh? If you left manky milk on the bottle, they wouldn't take them. The husband's the career man and the woman is the chief cook and bottle washer. So the last question to ask is about your communication style. So

going like, now that we're in each other's space all the time, it gets harder to ask. Is about your communication style. So going like now that we're in each other's space all the time, it gets harder to communicate with people when you're in their space all the time. So setting up the way that when things are difficult, you want to communicate. Do we want to have a little meeting? Do we want to hone into it? Do I want to chuck a loaf of bread at your head?

Speak from experience? Do we want to calm things down by talking through text? Yeah. You've got to work it out. In different rooms. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sort of aggressively misinterpreting what the other person's saying because text is a terrible way to communicate. I found the song. Oh my god. Did you?

It's from The Rink. The musical, a new musical. Liza Minnelli was in this. Lucille Too. Lucille Too. My dear late husband and all his dear late family. Lucille 2. Lucille 2. A wrestling band. Should I try that? Yeah, you've got to go forward.

Get to the meaty bit. Tell me when I'm getting close, Sproul. I've got no idea what I'm searching for. This feels like it. Yeah, I can't even remember. We sang it. She's a cook and bottle washer. That's what I always was. Doing what the cook and bottle washer does.

I love the da-da-da. I was just going to say it's going to happen. Da-da-da. Musicals these days. Hamilton. Didn't have enough of da-da-da. Da-da-da. Well, isn't Hamilton coming?

Yes. To New Zealand? I'm not going if it doesn't have a rat-a-tat. It needs more rat-a-tat. It needs Liza Minnelli. I don't know. Is there room for Liza Minnelli? I don't think she needs Liza Minnelli.

Doesn't she have vertigo? Or was that just on the show? That was just on a recent development. That was just on a recent development. Rippling vertigo? No, she's very unwell. Because Lady Gaga helped her, didn't she? That's right.

She's a bit lost and confused. Silly Little Pole is next. In front of a crowd. Are you the chief cook or are you the bottle washer? Do we get the three? Yeah, we got all three. Okay, what was the three? Communication, expectations, household roles.

Okay. Before you move in with a partner. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Silly Little Pole. Silly little poe Silly little poe It is so silly, silly, silly That the silly little poe Silly little poe

Silly little poe Silly little poe Silly little poe Oh my God, stunning. Thank you. Ever since you got inspired by the musical theatre of days gone by. In front of a crowd, would you rather spell or do maths?

I'm terrible at maths. Not that great at spelling. I did spell in front of New Zealand. You did the Guy Montgomery spelling bee. Spelling bee, you're not allowed to write it down, are you? You just have to rock it off the top. Whereas I think if you're doing maths, you're allowed to write it down You just have to rock it off the top Whereas I think if you're doing maths You're allowed to write it down

You have to be able to Yeah So I'd Probably like to do maths But not one of those maths Here's You've got to like If it's just written down

Yeah I'll give it a blast But if it's one of those ones Where you've got to work out How it all works And then there are letters in there. Yeah. X and Y.

Oh, my God. No, thanks. Then there's letters. That's called algebra. Then there's letters. I thought this was math. That's when I clocked out of maths. One of the greatest pieces of maths solving that I've ever witnessed,

Hayley, you were there too, was Angela Dravid solving this maths puzzle on Have You Been Paying Attention. She was so unsure of herself, and she's like, I think it's this and that and, is it seven? She literally algebraed it. She algebraed it.

There was a long way of doing it. She was like, so if X is that, then she put brackets. X is half of Y, and Y is double A, and A is this. Then I let it work backwards. And we were just like, what?

And she's like, I don't know. Am I right? I was like, dude, that was amazing. She absolutely algebra'd it. I'd rather, yeah. You'd rather write it down. I think because you can write it down. If I could write down the spelling to see if it looked right.

No. I mean, I'd rather not be in front of a crowd doing either, to be honest. You need to be tested in front of a crowd. You've got to pick one. I'd go spelling. Okay, so what if there was a third option that's doing a poo-poo? I'd do poo-poo. I'd do a poo-poo.

Everybody poo-poo. I'd do a poo-poo. Just watch you. You can't stuff it up. It's your, yeah, every, every. Yeah. Everybody poops. Everybody poops.

What are the nations? In the words of REM. Everybody poops. In front of of REM. Everybody poops. In front of a crowd, would you rather spell 69% or do maths 31%? So spelling, absolutely romping home. Wow. Winter says. Beautiful name.

At least when spelling under pressure, you can hopefully at least come close, even if you're wrong, since there's only 26 letters in the alphabet. I mean, she's got a point. There's literally infinite numbers. at least come close even if you're wrong since there's only 26 letters in the alphabet. I mean, she's got a point. There's literally infinite numbers. Math is wide open view to miss by an absolute

country mile. Yes, you cannot argue with that logic. And then at least if you spell it phonetically, people are like, let's see how she got there.

Yeah, you can sort of sound it out. Yeah. Holly said, neither. I'd rather strip naked in front of a crowd than do either of those things. She went straight to strip naked. I wonder if she'd like to stop at the third option of poop.

Yeah, she'd poop. She went straight, like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. She's, like, taking her clothes off. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. There's a third option. You can take a poop. She's like, I'm naked. I'm honestly doing whatever.

This is sweet. You know when you're getting ready for the shower or whatever and you're naked and then you're like, I might actually need to poop. And you're actually, like, fully naked. It's'm going to do whatever's sweet. You know when you're getting ready for the shower or whatever and you're naked and then you're like, I'm actually in a pool and you're actually like fully naked. It's absurd, eh? It's absurd.

You're sitting there and you're like, oh my God. Imagine if someone walked in. I know and you feel so like out. Yeah.

It's weird, eh? Yeah. Like you're almost like, mum? Mum? Can you come out and wipe my bum? I'm a teacher and I

run my class every day. I write on the board that there's a reason I don't teach English, says Jordan. So Jordan's obviously got some spelling issues there on the board. Okay, yeah, right. Lucille, not Lucille 2. Not Lucille Bluth either. Separate Lucille, not suffering from vertigo.

Perhaps doing maths in front of a crowd would be the only useful use for my maths degree. A maths degree? Now you're showing off with a degree in maths. Oh, no. What do you do with a degree in maths, by the way? Teach maths, I think. I think you bang on a year at Teachers College and you teach.

Right. I've read books. Oh, I read books, not calculators, said Alicia. Except when I've written 531-8008. Boobies. And I flip the calculator upside down. Yeah. And then she did a shucker.

Yeah. She knows. That was a female that messaged that. That's the male antics, writing boobies on a calculator and throwing a shucker. Really? She spends lava boobies on a calculator. Do that. Well, I can't speak for... And you can write shell.

Alicia's sexual orientation. Oh, what an innocent boy. Yeah. I used to write shell, not boobies. Oh. Sorry, I'm more advanced. So, 7, 7, 3, 4, 5, upside down. Yeah.

Shell. Shell. Everyone's doing pictures of boobies and you're like, I can also write shell. What petrol station do you go to? Shell. Yeah, because it used to be a petrol station. I thought it was quite advanced.

Okay. Good for you, man. What a cool kid. Harriet says, because the last time I tried to do maths was when my partner, as a dig joke at my maths, asked me what one quarter plus one quarter was. And I answered one and a half. One and a half. One and a half. You're halfway there.

Yeah. I'd love to know where that one came from. Yeah, just adding a whole one. How do you add a whole one in there? Yeah. You should think of it like pizzas. Anytime I think quarters, anytime I think fractions,

I feel like I'm working it out in pizza form. But do you get a bit tripped up when it's one eighth? Because they don't do pizzas in eighths. Yeah, it's half of a quarter. Yeah, they do pizzas in eighths. What eighths is the pizza? What about one sixteenth? That's just slicing an eighth and half again.

What about one sixteenth? That's an eighth and half again. They don't give you 16 pieces. That's when your wife's like, I just want a little bit more pizza, but not a whole slice. And they do a half, and then they leave a half, and they go back and get the other half. Yeah, and then later on they eat their other 16th, and you're like, okay, how many pieces have you eaten since you said you were full? And they say a half, and then they leave a half, and they go back and get the other half. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then later on they eat their other one, 16th.

And you're like, okay, how many pieces have you eaten since you said you were full? And then they say one eighth. And then they eat your chips, which they didn't want to order because they didn't want chips. Those bastards. Chips, harder to work out. Fractions. Yeah, I ate 7 36ths of this bowl of chips.

Yeah. A little bit harder. Kelly said, I would rather spell because I did cabbage maths at high school. I'm sure there's a better name for it than cabbage maths. We used to call it cabbage maths. What do they call it now? Remedial? Oh, okay. Remedial is the word that helps you. Wasn't

producer Shannon in purple? In the purple reading group. Purple spelling. That's right. Yeah, so there was a red group, a yellow group, a green group, and then Shannon was in the purple group. That's not even on the traffic light.

And what was purple? Like real shit. I think we can figure it out from the context. Was red better or green better? What was best? I can't remember. I never advanced. Green's got to be best, right? No, red's got to be best because it's like, I'm alarmingly good.

I would be more thinking about getting your child was alarmingly bad. Did you manage to progress through your school years? I mean, I did schooling, but I just never got there. You turned up to school. You went to school. I've got a degree now, but it's in talking. I don't need spelling. Who needs it?

Except now my job's social media and I spell break wrong on that page. I've got a degree of rolling on the floor, so don't worry about it. They're silly. All of the degrees are silly. Almost as silly as a bloody maths degree. I mean, I think people with health science degrees might disagree. To all degrees are silly. I think health is intuitive. I think your body

tells you what it needs. Your body tells you what it needs. Does it? Have you eaten a carrot? That'll sort it out. We can end there or we can go to Sally. I feel like we should end there. Oh no, we've got to Sally. Now you're teasing me about Sally. I was an annoying kid who used to flex my ability to spell supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

at age seven. I always wished I could do a spelling bee. Now I'm a teacher because once a nerd, always a nerd. Do you know who else was a nerd? Fletch and Shell on a calculator. That was pretty cool. Boobies was cool.

Play ZM's Fletch Vodaneli. Play ZM. Well, a woman on TikTok has gone viral, NotJennaRee. And she's gone viral for this. What's her name? NotJennaRee. It's like her handle. So she is Jenna.

That's Jennifer Reardon is her name. I was like, NotJennaRee. Is it not her name? No, NotJennaRee. NotJennaRee. Got you, got you. That's her user. So on TikTok, this video went viral.

She works in communications, and she has shared the question that she reckons gets her the job every time because every time she has asked us in an interview, a job interview, she's landed it. So she said you do the job interview as usual. You know, you answer their questions, and then right at the end, you know, they normally say, do you have any questions for us? Oh, I love that.

That's a challenge. Yeah. And so her question is, you say every time, do you have any concerns about me for this job that we can address now? But that's just throwing it back and forward. They say, question, question, question. Do you have any questions for us? Do you have any concerns about me? But then she said it's a way of dealing with, you know, because

after all the job interviews, you know, the people at the workplace are going to be like, okay, what do you think about Gina? What do you think about Vaughn? Hayley? I don't know. Hayley seems a bit much. So you want them to say in the moment you seem a bit much? Yeah. So then you're like, any concerns about me? Well, you do seem a bit

much. No, I'm not. You're a bit much. Yeah, so then you're like, any concerns about me? Well, you do seem a bit much. No, I'm not. You're a bit much. You're proving our point. Wow. I do like the, it's powerful, because I feel like there's the element of like, applying for a job where like, you're

begging, and they've got the power. But it might be something like, you might say to them, do you have any concerns about me? And they could say, well, we're a little concerned you don't have many years' experience. Thank you for bringing that up. While I lack in experience, what I have is da-da-da-da-da. But it just gives you another chance just to kind of persuade them

before, like a final argument. You voice the concern so you can erase it for them. And then you can say, well, you know, what I lack there, I lack in, I lack in. I bring a lot of enthusiasm and I've got great. Fresh perspective. Help. And I'm cute and I'm funny.

All these words that you're meant to use in job interviews because I've never, ever had a job interview. I think I've had like one. I think I've had one, maybe. Job interview. Yeah, I think I've had one. I mean, I suppose auditions are job interviews. Auditions would be job interviews every single time,

aren't they? But that's kind of a bit different. You're not answering their weird questions. You're just doing your silly voices and acting. That's what every audition is, just silly voices. Might I have this job, please? I remember my friend who was a freelancer. He was like a freelance producer in the theatre world.

He started getting bigger and bigger jobs and I was like, how are you doing this? And he said, I asked this question. And they'll say when it came to pay, they'd say oh look, it's a low budget production, we can only offer you $500 a week. And he'd say, thank you for that. I think what the experience I bring is a da-da-da-da

and then at the end of him saying I need more money, he'd say, what are you going to do about it? And I was like, that is so full on. He's like, it always works. What a power play. Yeah, so what are we going to do? What are you going to do about it?

What are you going to do about it? Because then it makes them feel like they're incapable. Well, this is a you problem. Well, I'm the employer, of course. You know that's not what I'm worth. I'm worth so much more than that. So what are you going to do about it? And if you can't afford me to pay, I guess that's. I'm worth so much more than that. So what are you going to do about it? And if you can't afford me to pay, I guess that's on you.

You're not good enough. Yeah, what are you going to do about it? I am good enough. Powerful. Try it. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. From the bustling ZM think tank, this is the top six.

Hello there. Shania Twain. 57 years old, is she? Eileen Regina Shania Twain. Eileen Twain. Doesn't roll off the tongue like Shania, does it? Shania Train is a thing now. It's a train named after Shania Twain. Yeah. She's stoked about it.

Very high tech. I was just reading about this train. It's in Switzerland. It runs from Lake Geneva to Interlaken in central Switzerland. Oh, I don't know about it. I don't know much about Switzerland, but lots of trains. Lots of trains. Beautiful place. I know, yeah, yeah. Per capita and per square mile, one of the most trained nation in the world, aren't they? Yeah, we get everywhere on the train. Lots of trains. Well, I have, off the back of Shania Train, the top six other celebrity transport name puns that should be happening immediately.

Okay. Number six on the list. If you're an Uber driver, you should rename your Uber Michelle Uberama. Oh, gosh. Here we go. Michelle Uberama. Here we gosh. Here we go. Michelle Uburama. Here we go. Okay.

Yeah. Number five on the list. If you're a Catholic and you've got a water-based leisure craft, you should rename it Boat Benedict XVI. That is Boat Benedict. I like that. Boat Benedict, baby. I like that. Boat Benedict, baby. I like that.

I like that. Better than Gone Fishing. Oh, yeah. Or whatever people name their boats. After your mistress. Yeah. Sea Mistress. That's what you do.

You name your boat after. Sea Mistress. Yeah. Right. Number four on the list of the top six other celebrity transport name puns. This one would work in Melbourne or for one specific mode of transport in Christchurch. John Tramvolta. John Tramvolta.

Come on, Christchurch. Do the right thing. Do the right thing. Name one of those trams. John Tramvolta. Yes. Or Tramola Anderson. Tramola Anderson.

We'll also accept. Let's name the Christchurch trams. John Tramvol Anderson. Trammela Anderson. Could be the other one. We'll also accept. Let's name the Christchurch Tramps. John Tramvalter and Trammela Anderson. Trammela Anderson. I love it. Number three on the list of the top six other celebrity transport name puns, George W. Buss. Oh, yeah.

He was the president of the United States of America. George W. Buss. Number two on the list. This came in via text. Did it? Wait, so you were gifted a free one? I was gifted a free one. This came in when we first announced what the top six Are you giving them credit for this?

Is there a name? There's no name, but there is a phone number that ends in 936. Oh, another one just came in. Not bad. Is it better? Is it better? No. Okay. Top six. Celebrity transport name palms. Gift from the text machine.

Lady Kaka. Yes, yes, yes. Lady Kaka. Lady Kaka. Isn't Kaka in Te Reo Maori poo? Poo poos, yeah. You've got to be careful. You've really got to hit the R.

Lady Karkar. And number one on the list of the, well, the other one that came in on text, surely Playing the Rock Johnson's going to make an appearance. Oh, yeah. I missed that one. I didn't do Playing the Rock Johnson. That's a bonus one.

Number one on the list of the top six celebrity transport name puns, let's rename the fairy to Waiheke Island, Jenniferianiston. I like that. I like it. You snorted. I like it. I like it a lot. Get aboard.

Whenever I go to Waiheke now. You're going to say you're taking the 1130 Jenniferianiston. Yeah. That is today's substance. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. This weekend, producer Jared and I will be engaging in some charity work. He doesn't like to go on about it. We had to force him to talk about this today.

Consider my arm twisted. Yeah. Consider my arm twisted. Please do talk about it, Vaughn, because we need to acknowledge the kind of charity work you do. I know this is great because you guys don't love talking about Dungeons & Dragons. But you do love talking about charity. So what a juxtaposition you find yourselves in right now.

Because Hayley and I don't want to block the charity. Because we're big on charity. We do so much. Except we don't go on about it. But we're doing a D&D livestream for Cyclone Relief. For resources, a Hawke's Bay-based charity helps people out. And obviously they've been very busy since Cyclone Gabrielle. Gabby.

Did I hear in the news before Rod Stewart called it Gabriella? That's tarnishing Gabriellas. Beautiful Gabriellas. Gabriellas, though, not your year. Did you see the total insurance claims are like $800 million? $890 million. Nearly a billion. And that's just what they've got to so far.

Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, that's what they can categorise. Feelings that that could go upwards of a billion dollars. I can't help but think, how will this impact me? You know? Are my insurance premiums going to go out the window? I think everybody's are.

I think everybody's are. I think everyone's are. Yeah. Yeah. It's going to go up. Just add that to that. Everything's... Add that to the cost of living crisis.

Everything. Yeah, everything. Is it going up? Everything. Everything's going up. Okay, good, good, good, good. But if you've got some pennies, we are playing Dungeons and Dragons

and live streaming it and raising money for resource. Now, this is on Twitch. This is on Twitch. Yes, well done. Because yesterday when we talked about this on the podcast, you called it game streaming website Twitch. Yeah. Which I don't know why I found it so funny.

I don't know why I found the word Twitch so funny. But, yes, it's twitch. Two o'clock on Sunday afternoon. So if people want to donate money and watch you nerds. There's prizes. There's lots of prizes. A lot of celebrity nerds are involved.

I had no idea so many comedians were nerds. You didn't? No. You met Ray O'Leary? Yeah, he's okay. He's not playing, but he has played and he knows how to play. God, he'd be good at that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. New Zealand's favourite nerd. Who else is involved?

Yourself and producer Jared. Yes, Rhys Mathieson's playing. Brinley Stent's playing. Harris, who is organising it, is playing. And Adam. Adam King from Viva La Dirt League. Oh, yeah, big oh yeah big time player big time nerds

big time nerds okay oh there's some prizes here yeah there's lots of prizes so we watch to the Dungeons and Dragons so we watch on Twitch and we could win prizes

yeah you donate and you can win prizes and stuff how do we donate? there's just a link there'll be a link you can pre-donate before the game starts

and you can be like I want to donate this but and then you get you know in a tel starts, and you can be like, I want to donate this. And then you get, you know in a telethon where you used to be like, I want to see Simon Barnett drink a raw egg. Yeah. And Simon Barnett would risk life and limb for salmonella for that $10. Yeah, he risked so much salmonella in the years. Can I do that?

Can I pay any raw egg consumption? Can I give you $10 now because you don't want to watch? I've got a $5 note. I don't watch. Well, I'll give you the link. I don't have Twitch. Is it on Sunday? I'll give you the, it's on Sunday at 2 p.m., yes.

There's an event on Facebook. If you search for Fantasy Fundraiser. I'm actually going to be outside. I might put the link on your socials. I'm actually going to be outside. Isn't it raining on Sunday? I think the new marching season's already kicking off. I used to wait for you a week after nationals.

Okay, well, there you go. Sunday, if you can help out and watch on Twitch. Search Fantasy Fundraiser on Facebook. It'll pop up. It'll be on your Instagram, won't it? Yeah, I'll put it on there. Spells and Dragons are the guys running it, and they help kids learn.

They help introduce children to Dungeons and Dragons, but it also, like, boosts their confidence with maths. Oh, sorry, neither. Yeah. Isn't that a nice thing? That's lovely. Maths can be intimidating, but if you're having fun with your friends while you're doing it,

hey, maths can be fun too. Was that a good sell? Yeah. That was a good sell. That was so good. Next on the show, final rankings. And today, we do this every Friday. Today, we're going to rank hangover drinks or cures.

I know mine immediately. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. It's the final rankings. Well, every Friday we do this, we rank something. Normally food items. Yeah, typically we're focused on food. Today the rankings we will discuss hangover drinks.

You've got your Powerade's. Blue. My favourite. I can't do a Powerade. It's too sweet. I'm the same. But when I do, and if I have in the past, it's always green. Do they still do green Powerade? Yuck. Yeah, they do. What do you mean yuck? That's the one.

No, blue is that hangover Powerade of the people. No, it's not. Trust me. She is a common folk. I had one on Wednesday. I had one on Wednesday. Because all marching girls know this as well because every hangover

I've had I've basically had to go to marching afterwards and you always, if someone turns up with a blue Powerade, you're like, oh hon. Oh hon, hon. We get it, we get it. What happened?

Oh, you'll be alright. We'll get through it. It's got to be blue Powerade. For me, I know mine straight out the gate. Number one is pulpy orange juice. Oh, yum.

Because I'm not a coffee drinker. I need something to like, it's like health. Vitamin C. Yeah. Pulpy, thick. It's going to be cold.

Ideally, it's some kind of cafe. I don't want to pay $7 for it. I'll hoon a pulpy orange juice straight from the bottle. Yeah. Yes. To me, there are different stages of the hangover and different hangover drinks though. Like first up, when you wake up, you're going to need some water,

and then either a Powerade or, in my case, love the coconut water. A bit of coconut water before bed, and in the morning, that helps the hangover. Nature's Powerade. Nature's Powerade. It's too thick for me. That makes me want to, like, chunny. Coconut.

Coconut. Water. Yeah, coconut water. It's a bit, like, viscous. want to like chunny. Coconut. Coconut. Water. Yeah, coconut water. It's a bit like viscous. We should call it coconut juice, by the way. It's a juice. It's the juice of the coconut. It's the water.

It's probably put into that packet by monkeys too. Probably. Do you hear that? I've got to have something to do. Slave labour monkeys. I'm putting coconut cream into cans. How do they get it into the cans? We've got to get the monkeys off the streets.

They'll get into ram raids next. It's good they're paid a payment. They're not stealing tourist handbags. Yeah, correct. I'm going to go pulpy orange juice, number one. Water, number two. Can't get enough. Water.

Icy cold water. Unless you've taken it way too far. You know when you're super crook, you're like, little sips of water. You can't get a good skull on. And number three Blue Powerade that's me sorted for the day I don't need any more liquids

one for me number one water number two black coffee number three pulpy orange juice

doesn't doesn't black coffee doesn't it send your tummy churning a bit it's you need it you need the coffee but it's

it's a catch-22 because it dehydrates you. Coffee dehydrates you. Yeah, but he's number one watering. Yeah, you're making up for it. I'm watering. But yeah, I'm with you. Coffee would be, what,

two on the list, I reckon. Yeah, but you're milky. But sometimes a milky coffee or like a blended coffee. Milk and a hangover. That's where you've gone wrong. Oh my God. Dude, you want to hear some of these text messages?

Okay, go. My hangover cure is a Barocca and two Panadol before you go to bed. A Barocca rules. Barocca rules. That might be a placebo, but a Barocca rules. You're getting some vitamins there. Yep, and two Panadol before you go to bed. That's three panadol.

Or take a couple of Panadol. I'm hungover. I need a Panadol. Half and half apple juice and water. Oh, okay. They're watering down their apple juice.

But do you know they're just getting cheap apple juice? You're just getting sugar there. You're just getting some sugar. That's what just juice.

Yeah, nah. Listen to this one. This almost, when I read this, prep yourself for a little vomit in the mouth. Okay.

And the next time you're hungover, you're not going to be able to think of anything other than this. Absolute monster's answer to the best hangover drink. 100% a blue Powerade. And then when you finish that, hit a cold chocolate milk.

Oh, you know, I get that. Sometimes I like a chocolate milk or an iced coffee when I'm hungover. Sade will either be, if you're new to the show, that is the woman I've been married to for a thousand years. She will either be in the mood for a banana milk or a tomato juice. It's one or the other. Nippies banana milk is the best banana milk. I think she's a primo.

Sade, I just lost respect for her. Oh, my God, it's all gone. Well, I don't know. It's just whatever there is, she's like, nanny milk. Nanny milk. Nanny milk. Nanny milk. Bubby, mummy need your nanny milk.

And then I've got to drive to get the nanny milk. Does she say Bertie? Bertie need a, Bertie, Tati need a nanny milk. Nani milk. Nani milk. And then I've got to drive to get the nani milk. Does she say Bertie? Bertie need a, Bertie Tati need a nani milk. Oh my God. That's what she'll say. I'm vomiting everywhere. Milk on a hangover. What are you doing?

Okay. Oh, it's another. I'm loving the suggestions. Number one hangover drink. Thanks to your show sponsor. Yeah. Macca's banana fig shake. Oh yeah. Yum. Bertie Tati need nani milk. I want a fig one from Nani. thanks to your show sponsor yeah Macca's banana thick shake oh yeah yum

Bertie tartineed nanny milkshake from non-worlds see I'd rather do chocolate I'd rather do chocolate but yeah yum what else have we got here everyone wants thick

yeah there's something you do to fitness because it feels like food water fizzy from the 3am takeaways so they've got some left over fizz.

Maybe they got half the way through that. They put it in the fridge. Maybe an Earl Grey tea. Gross. Yuck. Coconut water. Hydrolyte. Ginger beer.

Any sort of juice. Ginger beer's good. I forgot about the hydrolyte tablets. You put a hydrolyte tablet in a glass of water before bed and one in the morning when you wake up. I'll probably wet the bed. Any sort of juice. Ice coffee. I'll probably wet the bed. Any sort of juice, ice coffee, Powerade, waters.

Yeah. Oh, God, they're ingesting a lot of liquid. That's all one person. That's all you need. You've got to get the liquids up, yeah. Chocolate milk. Thick homegrown orange juice. Homegrown does do good juice. Yeah, they are the best.

That's the best juice. And they overtook Charlie's, let's be honest. They have overtook Charlie's. Charlie's dropped the ball. All since Mark Ellis tapped out of Charlie's. Mark Ellis stopped squeezing the juice and we... Yeah. You can't taste Mark Ellis anymore.

It's gone. It's lost that, you know. Yeah. It's lost that larrikin additive. What about a frozen Coke from Nonald's? That's me on a hangover. Yeah. Because it's so cold and you feel like cold's going to be the cure.

Yeah. Ice cold water with a lemon squeezed in it. I was so hungover after my 21st went out for breakfast with the fam and felt so sick, and a lovely waitress brought me an ice cold water with lemon squeezed in it. I swear by it ever since. Oh, okay. Yeah.

I mean, shout out the person who suggested having a beer. Yeah. I'm not encouraging that kind of behaviour, but every now and then, like at lunchtime the next day. Yeah. Just a light beer. A Guinness absolutely hits the spot when you're hungry. Nah, it's got to be just a lager.

Well, thick Guinness. That may help you this weekend or it may not. Wow, people are really coming in. Now that's food. That's frozen liquid. Even just a glass of grapefruit juice. Yum. But I'm on the pill.

Yeah, I'm on the pill. Yeah, we can't be having that. Is this Here Comes the Bride? Yes. Well, there is no bride at the wedding today. Oh, cancelled. I'm sorry, do you have a problem with same-sex marriage? Yeah, sounds like it. Two men.

I'm sorry, do you have a problem with two mensex marriage? Yeah, it sounds like it. Two men. I'm sorry, do you have a problem with two men proclaiming their love to each other? Sure sounds like it. Wow, here comes the bride. Just because there's two men, one of them isn't the bride. Yeah, which one's the girl? You don't say that. Which one's wearing the frilly frock?

It's not 1992, pal. Wow. Just change the, here comes the groom. No, the groom. You've got to go for a gender neutral. I've got a gender neutral. Okay. Okay, sure.

But a cannon. Cannon in D. That's what it's called. It's classic. That's exactly what it's called. No, it sounds like you're in Hobbiton or something. This is like every classic wedding down the aisle. Yeah, it sounds like we've gone on a walk with hobbits.

Sounds like we're about to graduate. Are you marrying hobbits? It does sound like vitamin C graduation. Wait, oh my God, play that song. Yeah, that's what they, that's what she used. Are you kidding me? Oh my God, guys. Did vitamin C not write that?

No, Parchabel wrote this. It's very, very old. Wait, did they get away with that for free because it's so old? Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Better song. Way better song. As we go on.

It's to the tune of Cannon and Dee, guys. We didn't do music. We don't know these things. I didn't know these things. That's beautiful. Well, anyway, my friends aren't graduating. My two friends are getting married. They asked me at the engagement party nearly four years ago.

Wait. Yes! Would this be a fitting Friday flashback? It would be. So good. And then we could do the sunscreen song. Let's do the sunscreen song. Yes.

Anyway, my friends asked me. I didn't have my marriage licence, and they said, can you do it? And I was like, yeah, sure, and I got my marriage licence, which was quite difficult, and then COVID happened, and I've just been renewing this stupid thing.

It was just like small flu. I haven't heard of it. Kidding, it was a deadly virus. Was it specifically target? Gay people. Homosexuals. No, it didn't. Well, it certainly ruined their wedding

so why did it turn off why did it possibly ruin their wedding um because lots of people died and lots of people

we got locked inside do you not remember where were you in 2020 drunk I think the covid's affected

his memory oh he's got the long vid oh dear remember we've told you about the pandemic yeah

okay thanks Fletch Fletch yes Fletch. Yes. You guys have been friends for like 20 years? 20 years? Yeah. No, I don't think so.

He keeps calling us Grant and Polly. I'm so confused, Grant. No, I'm not Polly. No, we're not. They've moved. I'm Hayley. No, no, no, no, no. You're not.

Legendary broadcaster Pauline Gillespie. No, no, no, no. New broadcaster Hayley Brown. You're not Nick Tansley. We're on ZM though. Yes, we are, but you're not Nick Tansley. We're on ZM though. Yes, we are. But you're not Nick Tansley. Put the baked beans down.

Who am I? Vaughn. Vaughn Smith. Vaughn Smith. Yeah, you are. Don't freak out, Vaughn. Sometimes we have to remind him about the current day. You've got two children.

What time is it, Grant? I'm not mad. Can you rest assured, Vaughn, you've got a hot wife? Yes. Every time you go home, you find out you've got a hot wife. That would be the one good thing about losing your memory. Yeah. For me anyway, walking in and being like, we're married?

Get out. How did I do it? Give me some of that cake. Yeah. I've got to look at my pants. I'm like, no, that's still not any better. Anyway, I feel like my friends have entrusted me too much because literally yesterday I did Google legal requirements of a marriage just to make sure I knew exactly what it is.

And it's really simple. There are still some things you have to say, right? So you don't have to say like in sickness and in health, I do the, the, I do when and all that. Yeah. The two things you have to say, and if I don't say them, they're not married. One, I have to refer to them by their full name at least once.

Right. And then after that, I can just say Carl or Vaughn or whatever. Are we getting married? I mean, I know my memory's not great, but I don't think. Am I not your type? Well, I can't remember. He doesn't know his type. He's going to go out exploring.

So I'd have to say at least once, Vaughn Alan Smith, Carl Peter Fletcher, Hayley Jane Sproul, and then I can call you... Wait, stop! She just married us. Not yet, because there's one more thing I have to say. Yeah, now Vaughn's going to prison for monogamy. No, what is it? Mahogany. Mahogany. Breaking mahogany. Breaking mahogany. Stunning mahogany. And what's it called when I have to say. Yeah, now Bourne's going to prison for monogamy. No, it was mahogany.

Mahogany. Breaking mahogany. Breaking mahogany. Stunning mahogany. And what's it called when you have polygamy? Polygamy. Yeah. And then the other thing you have to say is, like,

some kind of sentence that indicates that you are willingly taking you to be your lawful whatever. Because if you're being held hostage, that's the time you're going to be your lawful whatever. Because if you're being held hostage, that's the time you're going to break your silence. Yeah. That's your out. So it used to say, I don't want to be held hostage.

It used to be like I do's, right? Like do you, Vaughn Alan Smith, take Carl Peter Fletcher as your lawful husband to have and to hold? I'm not saying it because I don't want to accidentally end it. Because I'm an extra celebrant. Wait, do I? No, no, no. I home. I'm not saying it because I don't want to accidentally end it. Because I'm an extra celebrity. Wait, do one. No, no, no.

I do. I do. It's too late. I've already done it. Yes. You're married. And then the other thing is the paperwork. That's what I've got to do.

I've got to sign at the witnesses and all this. So it's your first one today. Exciting. I know. I feel terrible. The mother of the groom who was my first friend before I met his husband-to-be, she was like, so how many weddings have you done? And I was like, zero.

She was like, oh. So have you had a rehearsal? Yeah, we did like a step through yesterday. Oh, okay, that's all right. You'll be fine. You're an actor. I'm an actor. An actor.

Get a bit of improv there if you're still. Maybe chuck a yes and and then drop into character. Yeah. Oh, can I get a household appliance, everybody? And a holiday destination. Toaster! Rarotonga! Okay.

Rarotonga. This food in Rarotonga is not really suiting me. May I have a piece of toast? Well, good luck. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. A man in North Carolina, an Amazon delivery driver

has gone viral on TikTok because he has accidentally wandered into an hours-long police standoff to deliver his Amazon package. What do you mean he wandered into it? From what I can see on the TikTok and the news stories that have come out, it's like an apartment block.

There's no police cordon tape, but there are like a dozen police cars, lights on, dozens of police, armed police. He just walks through the police cars up the path to the apartment block. He's stopped by a police officer. He hands the police officer the package and then takes a photo, because you know how they have to take a photo to prove it's been delivered? Yeah. And sign for it, and then he leaves.

I mean, what dedication? Like, shout out from his bosses. They should give him a bit of a raise for dedication to the job. Absolutely. Yeah. I mean. But he had no idea he just wandered into this huge armed standoff. Or maybe he did, but he didn't care.

Delivering my package. Or he didn't know how bad it was. Yeah. And he just all of a sudden finds himself in the middle of this police armed standoff. Did they not have a better cordoned off area? No, there was none of that tape. You know the police line do not cross or whatever the tape says? Yeah.

None of that. Good Lord. But I wanted to ask the question this morning, when have you accidentally wandered into something? We're not talking about police standoffs. No, not police standoffs. To the extent, because I love arriving somewhere where a couple's like arguing. Literally stop the argument.

Oh my God, you can like still hear the ring of it in the room and you're like, oh, crazy prank. G'day, guys. Oh, if you two had an argument, that's what you always say too. Yep. Or any kind of disagreement with friends and yeah, they stop or they carry on. Yeah.

Yeah. Wandering into an awkward situation or your hushed conversations in a bathroom at a party. Yeah, you walk into a... Don't you do it. Don't you do it. Get out. Oh, sorry, guys.

I just want to use the toilet. Oh, no, that's fine. Yeah, that's all good. I'm just in here. Yeah. Doing... Or maybe... What were we doing in here?

Or maybe you just walked into the middle of an event and you didn't know. Or a breakup. A breakup? Yeah. I've just walked into the middle of an event and you didn't know. Or a breakup. A breakup? Yeah. I've wandered into a bit of a situation in the green room

of a theatre, but I don't, what time is it? 7.44. Nah. How are you going to explain that to your kids? Oh,

well, an adult situation. An adult situation. Oh, with people that we would know? No, no, no,

no, no, no. Oh, right, okay. No, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no famous girls. Wow, okay. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no famous guys. Wow, okay. I just walked in and was like, what? I've never been walked in on. Neither. No, neither.

All right, well, we want to open up the- Touch wood, touch all the wood. Touch the wood. We want to open up the lines this morning. 0800-DARLS-AT-M. Give us a call. Text as well, 9696. When have you accidentally walked into an awkward situation?

This makes me want to cringe so bad. An argument, whatever it was, something super embarrassing. You walked, maybe someone didn't lock the toilet door. Would this be included as you get into a lift and someone's done a big stinky fart and you have to just stand in it together and go, you did that just seconds in it together and go, you did that just seconds before I got in, didn't you?

Unless somebody did it, dropped it and walked out and left that person for the blame. Well, that's what you're claiming. That's what you're claiming. That's what you claim has occurred. It's a weak claim. 0800 Giles at MSN number 9696 text. When did you walk into an awkward situation? We are talking about the wild and

awkward and weird situations that you've accidentally walked right in the middle of. An Amazon driver's gone viral after walking straight through a police line into the middle of an hours long armed standoff to deliver an Amazon package. Looking for

Mr. Bryce. Get out! get out. Okay, there are some wild messages coming in. I once accidentally walked into the middle of a gang jumping another gang in the US and got held up at gunpoint. Oh my gosh. Horrible. Terrifying. Horrible.

They're obviously still here or they're not texting from heaven. Well, you don't know. Or the afterlife. There's 5G in heaven apparently. There better be. I walked into my parents. No.

Yeah, you're pointing at something that's on the phone, but there's so many stories. And you know what the weird part about it is? The majority of people seem to be eight years old. That seems to be the age that happens most often. Cam, this has happened to you. You walked right into the middle of your parents having fun times. Yeah, yeah.

I was quite proud that I'd done my homework, and so I went in and was standing there, like, looking down at my homework, telling them what I'd done, and then I heard a scream, and I kind of looked up, and, yeah, terrified. What did they say to you? telling them what I'd done and then I heard a scream and I kind of looked up and yeah terrified what did they say to you um yeah it wasn't really a discussion that we sort of talked about it we kind of left it at that and I didn't really and how old were you yeah I was eight I was eight you got an eight-year-old lock lock your damn door. Lock the doors.

And that still obviously has traumatised you to this day, Cam. Yeah. Yeah, we... Yeah. It's one of them. It's one of them. You can hear him seeing it in his head. Yeah.

And we're sorry we did that to you. Well, an Amazon courier driver just accidentally walked into the middle of a police standoff to deliver a package. It was delivered. Photo taken. We want to know the awkward, weird, embarrassing situations you've just accidentally walked in on. Just wandered on in, do-do-do-do-do, and then your whole day changed.

I'm just running a filter over these. Yeah. Just sign for this one. My embarrassing moment is I walked into my parents' bedroom. My mother was lying flat on her back back naked with her eyes closed and a smile on her face. Now somewhere else was my father's head. Oh my. But then they say somewhere else

he was lying beside her with a smile also on his face. I saw my father's head. I was shocked. I still see this vision. And then they say I was aged 40 then. But wait, do you think they mean they still see the vision aged 40 or they were 40 when it happened?

It's not 40 when it happened. Oh, it's got to be 40 when it happened. Because then your parents are like. We're going to need a text in too. Yeah, if we could just have a clarification of that phone number ending in 417. Were you 40 when you saw it or are you 40 now and it still haunts you? Wow. Question mark.

Full noise. Yeah. We were having a party at my flat. One time haunts you? Wow. Question mark. Full noise. Yeah. We were having a party at my flat. One time I walked into my room there was a couple fighting they were having

a massive argument and they broke up. Oh. A week later I was at another party I went to the bathroom and I walked in on the same couple

having makeup in the shower. Oh wow. One of those couples. Okay, one of those couples. Oh my gosh. Everything. And they've got to restart the counter. They've got to restart the clock.

100%. Maeve, what did you accidentally walk in on? No, I wasn't walking in. We ended up rowing through a really significant sailing regatta. Rowing? Rowing through the sailing. Yeah. So it wasn't ideal.

Was everyone like, why are they so slow? Yeah. Look at that dud boat. God, they're going slow. But also, like, they're trying to get to the, what, the markers to go around them. The buoys. You're getting in the way.

Yeah. So there was just, yeah, a school crew just going for a nice little row and, yeah, ended up getting fairly verbally abused by quite a few of us. It was nice to have a wholesome message and call in, wasn't it? Yeah, thank you for keeping this clean. It was. It was. Babe, it's getting filthy in here.

Thank you, babe. We may have to read out a lot of these on the podcast only. Yeah, perhaps. That's actually a good idea. Because there's some wild stories coming in. My friend walked in on me during a moment of wellness. Self-reflection. Oh, yeah, right.

Self-reflection. Self-wellness. But he didn't leave. He just sat down around the corner where he couldn't see me and we just started talking. Oh, it was so awkward. He didn't know what to do. Yeah.

I'm on snorting today, but it's so awkward. I took a wrong turn while I was towing a boat. Ended up driving through the finishing part of a very large cycling race. With a boat. Sorry, sorry, excuse me. Play ZM's Fletchford and Ailey. Play ZM. And now we've just inserted ourselves back into the podcast.

We've thumbed ourselves in. Thumbed ourselves in here for some extra messages that we couldn't read out on air. I've got to say, my energy level's different to what it was moments ago. What is it? What happened? You just hit a wall, haven't you? I had a stretch and a yawn, and I just felt comfy. Would a scone help?

I think it would only make the situation worse. Okay. What about if we brought in a whiteboard marker for you to sniff? Yes. Jared. Here we go. Here we go. Shannon's got one.

Thank you. Bring some options. We've got a Sharpie. We've got a good Sharpie. Oh, a Sharpie. What brand are we talking? Do you have any spray paint? Expo.

Expo. Expo whiteboard markers. Okay. Oh, yeah. That's a start. Daddy likes that. Which one's best? Remarks doesn't have the markers. Okay. Oh, yeah. That's it. Is that good? Daddy likes it. Remarks. Daddy likes that.

Which one's best? Remarks doesn't have the scent. Okay. So give that Expo. There you go. He's back. There he is. He's back.

So we talked about him today. Your left eye's just dropped down. Just for the record, we were joking then, and we do not encourage sniffing of solvents or whiteboard markers. People don't have to explain things to their children on the podcast. Oh, okay. On broadcast, terrestrial broadcast radio. Sorry, I just got into that whole saving the balancing the break.

Yeah, no, no, no. The internet's the wild west. No, we can go utterly rogue on this. Sniff them, Arthur. Okay, well, no, no. The internet's the wild west. No, we can go utterly rogue on this. Sniff a marker. Okay, well, if we can. 5G towers. Okay, what are your thoughts? Have you guys heard about these?

I've heard about them. Tell me more. Yeah, they're messing around brains. Every time I get close to it, though, I black out and I wake up at home in bed. Those are the whiteboard markers that you're sniffing, not the 5G. Speaking of black, I fell over the other day and I cut my leg. My blood came out. It was black. It's the vaccine.

It's the vaccine to make your blood black. Watch this. Oh my god. That's the sound of a spoon sticking to my arm in the spot. Oh my god. And I can't get it off. Okay, weird joke, but what were you saying before? Like, so many kids aren't getting vaccinated this weekend. That's wild.

My daughter's school, school yeah um they got their boosters so their tetanus their herping cough and their diphtheria boosters and their first hpv vaccine shot yeah life-saving yeah and she got hers and handled it like a champ yeah and so she got made runner so she'd go to different classes and be like these are the children that need to follow me to the hall. Good girl. And there were all these kids getting vaccinated. And then, yeah, some kids were like, oh, my name shouldn't be on that list. My parents said I'm not getting vaccinated. Like some kids were getting it done at the doctor. They said they had a family doctor and they were going to go to the doctor and get it done because the doctor knew them.

The doctor lives in a yurt, you know what I'm saying? The doctor lives in a yurt You know what I'm saying The doctor lives in a yurt And their vaccines Are rubbed with a crystal After a full moon But they Yeah lots of them Opting out of like Vaccines that have been around

For a long long time And like really important ones too Yeah HPV man That causes cervical cancer And cervical cancer Kills a lot of women A lot

Of women So yeah they Yeah yeah They were opting out a lot. Yeah. Opting in a lot of that. Okay, so we've gone a little. We're right.

Yeah, we went deep, didn't we? But anyway, we did get a lot more messages. On what you walked in on. Yeah. You had a refresh, did you there, Han? Yeah. On your computer screen. Where do we talk about this?

At a very inopportune moment. Okay, quite a few people walking in on their parents going at it. We kind of covered that. Yeah, we did. Eight since they were the age. I walked in on my best friend giving my boyfriend a BJ once. So I think what they've missed there is the PBJ. They walked in on their boyfriend giving their...

Ain't nothing wrong with a peanut butter jelly sandwich. There's nothing wrong with that. A PBJ. I'd always be giving my best friend's boyfriend's PBJs. That would be the worst thing to walk in on. Your best friend and your boyfriend. Enjoying a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and you have not been invited? How rude.

Rude. I walked into the Globe Theatre. Oh, yeah. I've been there. Have you? Yeah, I have. What did you do there? Midsummer Night's Dream.

Oh, who were you in Midsummer Night's Dream? You were a tree. Helena. Helena's the tall character. I was not a tree. I'm not that tall. She's very tall. She's very tall. She was a tree. She played the Eiffel'm not a tree I'm not that tall She's very tall She's very tall

She is a tree She played the Eiffel Tower Oh I've been to the Globe I walked into the Globe Theatre As an oblivious tourist Got caught up in a crowd And ended up seeing Shakespeare For free whoops

Oh there you go That's a good not a bad thing To walk in Oh Jesus fucking boring Um My sister walked into a funeral So fucking boring My sister walked into a funeral

Thinking she was going to see an art show. But it was a person's wake after their funeral, and she was there for a solid 20 minutes looking at the art on the wall. Oh, my God. She was like, it's weird they've got sandwiches. And the vibe in here is down. This is a down bus. She was a funeral crasher.

Yeah. Wow. I just walked in yesterday to my boss telling my colleagues they were being made redundant. Very awkward. Horrible thing to walk in on. Yeah. Wow. I just walked in yesterday to my boss telling my colleagues they were being made redundant. Very awkward. Horrible thing to walk in on. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah.

I was 18. I was having a shower. Got out drying off. Didn't realize the door lock was broken. My brother's best mate walked in. The minute I put the towel down, he couldn't look at me after I got dressed. Oh, okay. He was probably stoked about that, though, wasn't he?

Yeah, yeah. A little stoked. I walked in front of the bride and groom at Edgewater in Rarotonga just after they'd been married. I honestly wanted to die, but also, in my defence, they shouldn't have walked through the outside seating area of a bar. Yeah, bastards. Yeah, I mean, that's on them for having a public place wedding, isn't it?

You can't control that. First time I smoked weed, me and a mate walked across a field at the Auckland domain. All of a sudden, people were yelling at us, and we realised we were walking across a cricket pitch of an active weekend cricket match yes

oh my god oh man the grass is real short on this bit oh man why is everybody in white ow

somebody just hit me in the head man um promise can't read this on air well we're on the podcast now, motherfucker. We fucking can.

Fucking fuck. Oh, whoa, whoa. Sorry, guys. Sorry. I'm sorry, guys. I'm sorry. You got carried away. I got so carried away.

You are the silliest of boys. You're like a child whose kid has just left the room. I'll tell you, you fucking fuck. I went around to drop some stuff off to my father-in-law and he's really deaf. I could hear the TV up quite loud, so I knew he was high and walked in. Door wasn't locked.

He was holding a novel in one hand and his penis in the other. A novel? He was masturbating to literature. Now that is what we in the business of masturbation call old school. Old school. It is old school, yeah.

I would love to know what novel he was reading. Too late now. To words. So old school. Too late now. It is old school I would love to know What novel he was reading Too late To words So old school Too late You know what I can reply to them They'll get it in real time

So by the end We might have received What novel was he reading What novel was it Okay Any idea I'll send that now We'll come back to that

When I was about 10 My brother and I went on the bus to Hamilton, from Hamilton to Rotorua to stay with family and friends. We got there and the police were in the house we were staying at, using it as a stakeout house to the house behind. Oh, dear. We and mum had no idea. They did the raid two days later. We were suggested to leave.

We got back and there were guns, police dogs, helicopters. The house had 32 holes in the glass from tear gas. And it turned out the guy living there was a two-times attempted murderer. Obviously not very good at it. What a lovely neighbour. Two-times attempted murder. Yeah, two times. God, third time a charm.

Just can't get the knife in them. We got to go off-roading and luging while they did the actual raid, though, on the police dollar. So that was quite fun. On the taxpayer dollar. Yeah. No quite fun. On the taxpayer dollar. Yeah. No bloody way. Yeah.

Go to the park for free. We shouldn't be paying for that. No, we shouldn't. I'd been with my partner for three plus years. We'd lived together and everything. We were hosting his extended family for the unveiling of his grandparents. His uncle was perfectly nice. Where were they?

The unveiling. Yeah. They were on a plinth in the middle of the museum. Oh, right. No, the unveiling. Yeah. They were on a plinth in the middle of a museum. Oh, right. No, the unveiling of the headstones. Tradition a year after burial. Yes. His uncle was perfectly nice to me.

However, when he got drunk later on, I was in the bathroom, and then I heard yelling. It turned out he was in the kitchen having an argument with my partner about how my partner's ex-wife was a much better fit with the family and how he should just ask for her to come back with him. I was trapped in the bathroom, had nowhere to go, had to wait it out and then calmly walk through. That's horrible. It's very obvious

I'd heard something. There's the story about the mother lying flat on her back, naked with her eyes closed. My mate walked in and me playing with myself. I walked into the dairy in the middle of it being robbed. As a child I was selling marshmallow Easter eggs door to door for school fundraising.

I walked into a massage parlor and saw a man's willy as he walked from one room to another. Was he like, I'll take half a dozen? And the lady in the reception said, get out, get out. You can't be in here. Get out. Massage parlor, eh? So no Easter eggs there.

Yeah. And no word on what novel that guy was reading. That person hasn't texted us back yet. I guess we'll never, ever, ever find out. What a erotic novel. Also, just before we leave, I do want to say that next week on the show, we will have three more flights with Next Flight to give away. So if you'd like to register, do that over the weekend.

ZM Online, it's thanks to Air New Zealand's Grab a Seat, Grab Life by the Seat. Check out grabaseat.co.nz for amazing deals on flights now. Well, the international listeners won't be able to. Well, no, but the local listeners absolutely will be able to. That's what we were saying. You love ads. And look

at you now, wedging one in. A freebie. I'm doing the job. Thank you. Absolute client service. In July, all the ticket details are at ZM Online. She is coming back to New Zealand. We love her.

She loves us. Hello, Elizobeth. Hey, guys. Hey. Hello, Elizo. Oh, I miss the Kiwi accent so much. I mean, you say you miss the Kiwi accent. You're going to be hearing it all around you in July.

You're coming to New Zealand. Oh, I can't f*** you up. Wait, like, no, you guys, y'all know how much I love the NZ, baby. Like, I live my life there. I have so much fun. I just feel like when celebs come to New Zealand, they say that we had Ed Sheeran recently, and he was like, if he could live anywhere else in the world, if it wasn't for his job, he'd live in Wellington, New Zealand.

Why don't you just come over? You know why? We all have a dumb reason. It's Lord of the Rings. We all saw that making of the movie where they were in New Zealand and it just looked like utopia. And we all think that we can just be hobbits

and live in New Zealand. Have you been to Hobbiton? Are you going to go when you're here? Listen, I wouldn't go to Hobbiton. You don't even know. I wouldn't go to hobbiton are you gonna go when you're here listen i don't even know i want to go to hobbiton so bad like i didn't get to go last time i don't think we were there long enough i went to the beach i would live no don't go to the beach our beach is famously uh full of human waste we you don't go to our beaches you gotta go to hobbiton it's like a drive away from

auckland you could do it. We'll take you. A drive is how far for you? Like three hours maybe? Two and a half? Okay, we can helicopter. We can helicopter. Oh my gosh, she's Lizzo.

I'm so embarrassed. I'm like offering to drive her in my car. We'll get you a chopper. You ask Lizzo to chip in for gas at the petrol station, you're like, ah, just 20 bucks. I get the snacks at the gas station. You're on snacks. Good, good, good, good, good, good. Now you've

been touring. You've got more tours coming up and New Zealand. Is there anything you take on tour to make it easier? Because you must just be it must just be hotels performing, hotels performing. Is it hard? You know, I had my favorite thing of all time, my favorite stuffed animal, my man, this last tour.

It, like, literally made the European tour feel like a vacation. What's your stuffed toy? Did you say it's a man? It's a man. It's a man. How tall is this man? Wait, how big is this man? What are we talking?

Like two. Oh, a bit short for me, actually, because I really, I go for the big boys. Yeah. So what is this? Is it a body pillow shaped like a man? Is that what we're talking about? I've got a man's face screen printed on? An actual man.

Oh, an actual man. Yeah, I've got one of those. Now I'm going to take him on tour. I'm a stuffed animal kind of sewer. I have so many stuffed animals. Let me show you guys. Oh! Oh, my goodness.

Yeah, Grogu Squishmallow. Oh, I've got to get me. Are these all Squishmallows? I don't know about these Squishmallows. They're all my children talk about. Oh, my God. There's another one, a bigger one. Mr. Smelly Nose. I one. Mr. Smelly Nose.

I've had Mr. Smelly Nose since I was, I don't even remember, like maybe three years old. Oh, my God. I love that. This is no still smell. Was he like a teddy bear that was like a bit of a scratch and sniff situation? Yes, he's a scratch and sniff.

Oh, my God, bitch, I can't talk. He's a scratch and sniff. Look how ragged he is. Lizzo, my teddy bear that I sleep with every night is so ratty and brown. My partner's like, get him out. Oh, look. This was all glitter when I first got him.

Not anymore. I scratched all the glitter off. Aw. Do you ever consider taking Mr. Scratch and Sniff onto stage with you? Oh, he has, no, he's super anxious. Oh my God, he's so sweet. What did his nose smell of?

I'm guessing strawberry, just on the color alone. Oh, nice. It smelled like Christmas. It was almost Christmasy, cranberry, you know, holly, pine needle-y smell. Full-blown Christmasy. Does your boyfriend, your aka 6.2-inch boyfriend, does he keep this beer in the bed with you? Does he keep what with me?

Does your boyfriend sleep with this beer as well? Beer. It's a beer. Beer. This is a bear. Bear. It's a beer. This is a bear. It's a beer. There's either the beer you drink or the beer the animal. Yeah, or I'm beer naked.

They're all the same. Beer and bear. But you say beer and beer. Beer, beer, beer. Beer, beer, beer. We do not give ours enough respect. We roll over them. enough respect. No. In our accent.

We roll over them. And the cargo does. They roll over ours like a Scottish. Yeah, they do. Brr, brr, brr. Give me a good phrase to say with a Kiwi accent, please. Um. It's cold.

Sweet as. Sweet as, bro. Sweet as, bro, is pretty. What about if I said, um, would you like to have a beer on my dick? What? Wait, what does that mean? It's like, would you like to consume a beer on my wooden porch? On my dick.

Dick. Dick. Your dick. Your dick. Deck. Deck. Dick. Your dick. Your dick. Dick. Dick. Dick. Okay, one more time.

Would you like to have a beer on my dick? Yes. Yeah, it's pretty good. Pretty good. It's pretty good. And then if I said to you, I would like that, you'd say sweet as bro. Sweet as bro. Sweet as bro.

Sweet as bro. Yeah. Yeah, bro. There you go. You got it sorted. Well, she's ready. I don't think I got it, guys. Well, you've got a bit of time to practice.

You're here in July, Lizzo. We're so excited to see you in New Zealand in July. We'll take you to Hobbiton. Yeah. And we can have a beer on the deck. Baby. Yeah, baby. We'll see you on the big deck.

Oh, my God, girl. I think it's called a stage. Yeah. Big deck. Oh, my God, girl. I think it's called a stage. Big big. Oh my God. Lizzo, thank you so much for chatting to us. Goodbye. And tickets, livenation.co.nz. The Live Nation pre-sale starts on the 28th.

General tickets on the 29th. But if you've got American Express, there's an 11 a.m. pre-sale today. All the details at ZM Online Plus. You can head to ZM's Facebook, Instagram page for more chances to win. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Last night before bed, in what has become an annoying routine, I go to get into bed and I discover my body pillow is missing. What? What the hell? I know how much that means to you. I think you and I, Vaughn, single-handedly increase the body pillow sales in New Zealand 485,000%. Me, you and pregnancy.

Yes. Because I love it. I put it on either side of it. I lie on my side and it keeps me from twisting in my sleep like a pretzel and giving myself a very sore lower back. My back's been okay lately. The body pillow is amazing. Everybody, your wife doesn't like the body pillow. It gets in the way.

She doesn't get as many. She will snuggle it after I leave. She'll snuggle up to the body pillow. But she doesn't. We think maybe two full body pillows in the bed might be a bit much. Right. Well, that's the death of sex.

Yeah. It's a double barrier. It's literally. It's basically, I'm South Korea, because let's face it, if I was going to be Korea, I'm fine South Korea. I'm cranking out Hyundai's and Samsung's left, right and center. And my wife's North Korea.

Because she's got missiles. She's got missiles and a little bit of an attitude. And then there's her wall, my wall, and in the middle of the demilitarized zone of North Korea. Which is the pillow. So, yeah. Because she's soft. Never signing a Friday night peace accord

with that sort of buffer in between you, are you? No, you're not. So just the one body pillow. Now, I said it went missing.

It's because when I'm having my pre-bed shower, my daughters will nick into the room, grab the body pillow and run and take it into their room.

So last night, What do they do with it? They both go on either side of it because they're smaller, they can both cuddle it. Right. They sleep in the same bed. Yeah.

Still. Yeah. Oh my God, weird. Do they have their own bed? They get on. They're siblings that get on. They get on. I know.

Do they have their own beds though? Yeah, they've got their own rooms and own beds. They just sleep in the same room. That's so weird. They're so cute. Yeah, it's really cute. Every morning when I leave

I make sure they've got a duvet up. Could you imagine sharing a bed with Philip? No, we shared a bedroom and 90% of the time we were like putting a tape

down the middle. I mean, I stare at my side of the room. Well, I can't get out the door. That's my brother's voice. I can't get out the door.

That's why he's not on radio. That's why he's not on radio. And I'd turn the tape a little bit so he'd have a thin corridor to get down.

And then I put twink in the eyes of his Ninja Turtles poster. The twink ran. I was just trying to do like see if I can get away with this and I pushed on the twink pen and it went and ran down the poster. I was like, well I am dead. And I got a hiding from him and dad. That's a double

whammy of a hiding. Wow. So last night I walked in and I said, give me the body pillow. And they both grabbed the body pillow to hold onto it tightly so I can't get it out. But I tickle them until they release and then I take the body pillow. And Andy said, you said you were going to buy us one of those.

You lied! Oh! Dad lied. Dad's a liar. Dad's a liar. Dad's a liar. Dad's a liar. I said said I'll buy you one next payday Which happens to be today That's today yeah And Indy's like a what? I said payday

And she's like what is payday? I'm like it's every two weeks on a Friday I get paid And she's like are you kidding me? I'm like what do you mean? And she's like, do they not just give you money every day? And I was like, explain to me how you, she thought I would leave work.

I'd be like, all right, guys, I'm off home. And I'd walk past the reception and be like, give me today's money, please. Give me today's money. And they'd give you a couple of notes and some coins. And I'd be like, ta-ta. And I'd put it in my pocket and I'd be off home. I'm leaving earlier today, so I'll take a little bit less.

Yeah. And she's like, they only pay you once every two weeks. I'm like, some people only get paid once a month. We used to get paid once a month, didn't we? I wouldn't handle it. Horrible. Horrible. You've got to pay like rent and bills immediately.

You put it all aside the minute you get it. Immediately. It's hard. It's hard. So she's like, how do you trust them that they will pay you? This is true. This is raising some questions for me. I don't know, I guess.

And she's like, so when they pay you for the two weeks, is it for the two weeks you've just worked or is it for the next two weeks? I said, I believe here it's the one week you've worked and one week in advance. Is that right? No. No, I thought it was the two weeks you've worked. We did it monthly here. It was two weeks.

It was the last half of the month and then the first half of the next month, and you were paid in the middle. Because I remember thinking that was really weird. You were being paid for something you hadn't done yet. Yeah. Sort of on the promise that you would. But then you could just leave, walk off the job. And you've been paid.

And you've been paid. Yes. But they'd probably have some holiday days, Oling. Exactly. They could take those, walk off the job. And you've been paid. And you've been paid. Yes. But they'd probably have some holiday days owing. Exactly. They could take dollars. Get you on that. Get you on that. And so she was just like, I just can't believe they're not paying you every day.

Like, you do your job for the day. Well done. Handshake. Money in the pocket. How weird would it be being paid every day? You know when you sign a contract and it's like, how would you prefer to be paid? Yeah. Daily's not an option.

No, daily's never an option. Like weekly, fortnightly, monthly. Weekly's the shortest term, right? No one gets paid. Yeah, otherwise payroll would become the worst job in the company every day. Literally every day. Oof, okay, oof. Yeah.

Put it all through. Oh my God, it's funny, the things that you don't know. Yeah, because growing up, I always remember we were dairy farmers. It was the 20th. The 20th. Like, that bill. 20th. I just remember growing up always hearing my grandparents and my parents always saying,

well, that bill can't get paid to the 20th. It's always the 20th. Write the check, post that at the 20th. Right. So no one can cash it before the 20th. The milk tanker dropped off the money. That was when the milk tanker took your milk but dropped off a whole treasure chest of cash. Because then it was the 10th and the 25th when I started working in Talley.

It was always 10 and 25. That's horrible. So if you missed the 25th, you'd have to wait until the 10th. If you missed the 10th. Oh, to put your invoices in to get paid. Yeah, I remember the 20th as well. Yeah, the 20th is always a big month. You're buying your daughter's body pillows now.

I've just purchased them, yes. Have they done anything to deserve these? Have you made them do chores? They're pretty good kids. Yeah, but at least get some chores done. Sure, this is the other thing.

We're talking about money. August walked in last night when we were watching, oh, we've started a new Netflix show. Oh, what one? Outlast. What is that?

It's like they've been dropped in Alaska and you don't get eliminated, you have to eliminate yourself. You have to shoot a flare gun and be like, come and get me. I'm a weakling. I'm a wimp.

Is it a reality show? Yeah. What if the polar bear gets you? Oh, there was a grizzly bear last night. Okay. There's a woman who was an ex-heroin addict, Fallon, who's been shot in the face with a.22. Now, I'd love to hear more about her story.

Oh, well, it sounds like you're about to find out. It's never happened to her. Shot in the face? With a.22 by an ex-part22. Now, I'd love to hear more about her story. Oh, well, it sounds like you're about to find out. She's shot in the face. With a.22 by an ex-partner. Now, that's never happened to me. I think she could take down a beer. The beer would just be like, she's like, I'm not scared of you, beer. The beer's like, I beg your pardon? She's like, I was an ex-heroin addict felon who's been shot in the face

by my partner with a.22, and it's not the worst thing that's happened to me. The beer would be like, I'll give you a wide berth. Yeah, yeah. I'm out of here. On with your day, ma'am. But we were starting watching that, and August walked in, and she's like, I'll give you a wide berth. I'm out of here. On with your day, ma'am. But we were starting watching that and August walked in and she's like, you owe me five bucks from four years ago.

She was four years and I was like, what? And she's like, I found some old an old book that I used to write in. Yeah. Like a diary. And she's like, no, it wasn't a diary because it was just like scribbles and pictures and stuff. But your name was written down there a lot. And she's like, no, it wasn't a diary because it was just like scribbles and pictures and stuff. But your name was written down there a lot.

And she's like, do you remember four years ago you said by the end of the week if you could spell my name without looking, you'd give me five bucks. You never gave me five bucks. Do you know you didn't give her the five? I can't remember. Who am I to argue with the eight-year-old mafia? She's playing you. She'll neck at me in my sleep. She's playing you.

I'll wake up with a body pillow hovering over my face, and she'll be like, hey, what happens when we don't pay our debts? Play it. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it, did it. D'you know?

D'you know? D'you know? Today's fact of the day is the hottest man-made temperature ever created. I think you said the hottest man of all time. The hottest man of all time. The jury has voted. The hottest man-made temperature of all time was 250,000 times hotter than the centre of the sun. What? Or how?

How did everything not just melt? Where was this? It was teeny tiny. It was the fastest collision of particles. This was in 2012. Remember when the Hadron Collider was the biggest worry? Take me back! Take me back to when we were worried about some

Swiss, Swedish? Swiss. Swishus. That thing, yeah. Scientists with this big underground loop of, what was it? A collider. Yeah. A large hadron collider.

Take me back to the time when we all thought when they turned that on, it was going to cause a black hole. This is controversial, but take me back to Kony 2012. It's a long way to go back. It's a long way to go back. It's a long way to go back. That's the thing I cared about most then. Yeah. And now I've got so many more issues.

So many more. I think it's just, you know, growing up, getting older, isn't it? But it was 7.2 trillion degrees Fahrenheit. But it was so tiny that it didn't. It was tiny. It was two gold nuclei of atoms at near light speed. They collided, producing the temperature 250,000 times hotter than the Centaurus. What thermometer did they use?

The barbecue one. You stick it in the chicken to make sure it's 74 degrees. Not rectal. Not rectal. Right. No, not specific enough. Yeah. Okay. That's Yeah. Okay. That's hot. Yes, that is how it is best described.

Really warm. Now I'm going to go and do some light. I'm going to leave these people to their whatever they're up to now. Yeah. You probably want to play some ads. Ads, ads, ads. That's all you ever talk about. Well, don't blame the ads on me. Don't blame the ads on me.

If there's one person in this room that loves ads. It's this guy. It's that guy. It's this guy. You know what these people need? They need ads. We need a bit of revenue. What are you going to be doing?

I'm going to go and do some reading on what they've been doing at the Large Hadron Collider lately. It's in Geneva in Switzerland, by the way. Geneva, a great convention. A great convention. Human rights and suffering and such. So today's fact of the day. Is that the hottest man-made temperature Was 250,000 times hotter than the centre of the sun

Fact of the day Day, day my god, you know TLC? The living channel. No, TLC channel network, TV network over in America that always has like, my 900 pound life. Just trash. Life is a goblin. What's our equivalent?

I'm married to a vampire man. What's our equivalent? Like Bravo or something? Yeah, we had Bravo. Oh, Bravo's more reality. Right. We don't have anything like this. Right.

We watch this on YouTube. They've got a new series called Extreme Sisters, and one episode followed Bailey and Brooke. They're not even twins. I thought they were twins, but they're not. One's 22, one's 27. Significantly, one is the baby sister. Their entire life, they've shared a bed.

Now, we just talked about your girls sharing a bed as kids. Which they're going to get out of soon, right? Yeah, we used to do it all the time, me and my brother. We had like separate... Really? Yeah, we shared a room and stuff

and we'd always be like... We shared a room and we hated it. Oh my God, we loved it. We'd stay up all night talking and then get told off and be like... What would you talk about? We used to play a game called Talk Teddies.

And, like, I had Kweli and he had Little Ted and they'd go on adventures. They had cars and we'd be like. And they'd, like, go on these whole. And we'd just stay up all night. And then your mum and dad come in and you're like. They're like, for Christ's sake, Sam and Hayley, you're 24 years old.

Would you move out of home and stop playing Talk Teddies? Oh, Kweli, where are we going today? But how old were you when you stopped sharing a bed? Oh, yeah, like kids. Yeah. Because he's a boy. He would have gone through like a real awkward phase quite early. Yeah.

You know, whereas I was like still a kid. So these sisters. So they shared a bed their whole life. They're adults now. And then one of them, the older one, got, sorry, they're 24 and 22. When the older one got married. And then so moved in with her husband, who's 27. And then Bailey was like, but I'm coming, eh?

And then Brooke was like, yeah. And then they still share the bed, even though the husband's there. What? What? What? Yeah. It's just like when Kiwis go to Whistler to work on the mountain and snowboard and stuff and they're eight to a room and they put a little, like, sock on the door handle

being like, just need 25 minutes sort of situation. I don't know how they do it. But, like, they just said it's just their happy space, it's their comfort space. And the husband was like, yeah, I had no idea this was going to be happening. I had no idea. He's like, look, I was in the dark. He's like, I do not agree with this.

Oh, no. Are there some issues there? Yeah. She was like, you knew that she'd be coming into the bed. And he was like, I did not know that. This is not cool. Anyway, we wanted to know. This is wild.

We wanted to know if you and your sibling are, like, weirdly close. I know twins are. I like twins have that. Yeah,, like, weirdly close. I don't know twins are. I like twins have that. Yeah, where they're just like. I mean, I can understand. I just can't relate to any of these stories. Nah. Yeah, I mean, I'm not weirdly close with my brother.

Like, but there's not much I wouldn't tell her. Like talk about boy problems to your brother? Yeah, we talk about everything. Never. Never. No. Yeah. I don't know.

We just always have. It's from talk about everything. Never. Never. No. Yeah. I don't know. We just always have. It's from talk teddies. We talk about our own feelings through the teddies. You know what? I kind of think talk teddies might be a great way to get you to open up, Fletch. Talk teddies. Get your brother around. Well, what about you and Philip could do talk teddies?

You and me could talk teddies. We could do talk teddies. Everything you've ever wanted to say, you say it as if Kweli and Little Ted are saying it. Yeah. But it's really coming from your soul. So, okay, so you want to hear from siblings that are super close. Yeah, maybe you're in your 30s and you're still flat together and you're just, you know.

What about siblings that married or went out with other siblings? Siblings. Siblings. Yeah. Like twins that married twins. Twins that married twins. Twins to me are an anomaly though because they've been together since, you know, the division of the oven.

The oven, yeah. I know. So I can write a lot off to twins. Yeah. And I know they're twins. But like some people call their like brother or sister like every day or every couple of days. I'm like, why do you need to do that?

Somebody said you were doing TED Talks in your bedroom before. Someone just messaged in saying you invented TED Talks. Oh my God. The Sprouse siblings created TED Talks. Wow, that is good. Good from that listener. They're really, really good. Talking about how close you are with your sibling.

Like there's sisters that still sleep in the same bed, and they're 24 and 22. In their 20s, and one of them's married, and the husband's in the bed as well. Not in a sexual way at all. No. Just that sisters have to be close to each other when they sleep. Listen, this text message just came in. From one brother to another brother.

Shout out to Bailey from Levin. He made his debut for the Central District's cricket team. I think he'll be nursing a sore head this morning, but I'm so very proud of him and proud to be his brother from Ben. Oh! Isn't that nice? Oh, that's so nice. If I made the Central District's cricket team,

my brother would say he only made that because I stopped playing cricket. Oh, wow. I'd probably say the same. But you did only... Ben, Central District must be struggling. That's what I'd say. You did only make that rep hockey team because your mum was the coach. He did.

Yeah, yeah, for sure. Christine was like, I better pick my boy Vaughn. She became coach because I was on the team. Not the other way around. She wasn't sanctioned to coach us. You are a nippo baby and it's disgusting. I'm a nippo baby. My friends in their mid to late 20s are siblings who live together,

work with their other halves, work together. Oh, together, work with their other halves, work together. Oh, they live together with their other halves, work together and socialise together. Until recently they were on the same team at work as I was both of their PA. Oh God, all day with them. All day, every day. No, no, no. Twice a year is fine to see your brother. Too much.

My sister and I spent years. That seems a lot, actually. Once at Christmas, it is perfectly fine. Yeah, my little sister and I spent years tormenting each other as kids, but now we're adults. She's my person. I talk to her multiple times a day. Aww. How close are you

with your sibling? We're taking those stories. Jessie, this is super close to your sister. You live next door. Yeah, I actually used to share a fence with my sister We lived on the same street and our parents actually just live around the corner

as well on the same subdivision I would love that It's too close You've got to at least be a four hour drive away Oh my god Now we're older When we were younger It's too close. You've got to at least be a four-hour drive away. Oh, my God. No, no, no. Now we're older. Like, when we were younger, it was like I would never dream of living next to her.

But now it's so handy. Yeah. Free babysitter? Is it a free babysitter situation? Yeah, free... Free dog sitter. Oh, yeah. There we go. Also, when you're like, oh, I feel like making a banana cake.

Got any bananas? Just chuck them over the fence. Yeah. Well, keep your hands open. They're like, well, no, I was planning to do something with those bananas. They're like, oh, I've got margaritas, but I don't have any bloody tequila, lime or Cointreau. I'm doing all the heavy lifting on this margarita. You don't have all the ingredients for margaritas.

Right, okay. There's the leeching. Jessie, thanks for your call. Some more messages in. My sister and I were born a year apart and grew up like twins. We have twin telepathy. Telepathy?

Oh. What's in there? No, the telepacus islands. Islands. You're thinking of the telepacus islands. Yeah. And they have the giant turtles. Telepathy.

Yeah. Tortapolis. Tortapolis. Tortapolis. Yeah. We've got twin telepathy Telepathy Telepathy

Yeah telepathy And can tell what each other are thinking Without even looking at each other We also talk every day And we're now in our early 30s That's nice I can tell what you guys are thinking though Okay what am I thinking about right now

You've got naughty thoughts in your brain Always So do you, naughty boy. Oh, my God. The two of you. Clean it up, please. Stop pushing your thoughts into our heads. I used to be super close with my brother.

We did everything together. Then his wife had an affair with my now ex-husband. Now we only speak and see each other at Christmas. What? So she got rid of her husband, but it sounds like the brother kept this one on. Oh, wow. Oh, my Lord.

That's all for Christmas? Absolutely scandalous. I'm 29, married with three children and one more on the way. My brother is also 29 and my sister is 25 and they both live with us. Oh, no, no, no. Live with you. Get out. Get out.

Haere atu. Goodbye. Someone said, I can't ever imagine Sharing anything with my sister I still get such great satisfaction Of running to the house And locking the door Well you go home at Christmas

And she's right behind you You shut the door Shedlock That's so good Yeah That is good stuff Somebody else said No no no no no

People are living too close To their siblings You gotta have a good stretch of state highway between you and your family. Oh, my God. Yeah. I do. The cook's straight.

The cook's straight. Oh, yeah, if you've got a body of water between you and the family. Lovely. Oh, another podcast in the bag. The plastic bag. Are they back? No, no, still banned.

Okay. They never left. That's where you come in with the line, boy. Boy, man, if you enjoyed that. Okay. Oh, and if you enjoyed it, give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell all of your friends. God, I need some sleep.

Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.