ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 25th January 2022

Episode Date: January 24, 2022

3/5 Need a sugary treat  Top 6: Ambulances  Phat Dumper  Silly Little Poll!  Potluck Weddings  Brad Olsen  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. Thanks to McCafe, try their refreshing McCafe iced coffee, available now at Macca's. How are your oats going? Don't get me started. I'm working through this glue in my bowl in front of me. The nutritionist said soluble fibre post show because the break between a 5am smoothie

and a 1pm lunch is too much. It's asleep. The body's burning. So she said soluble fibre and then try some oats. So I tried the overnight oats and you know how that went. They tasted like semen. You guzzled them down like a hungry old boy, didn't you?

I didn't even have to wash the jar. It was clean. I licked it. It was a deep jar too. My tongue came out like a nectar-feeding butterfly. Oh, my God. I just put it straight back in the pantry What is this flower It tastes like semen

So I tried the Vaughan Smith Special The sachet oats Half a cup of milk in the bowl What do you call that Porridge Did you hear that Slop Hang on What do you call that? Porridge Did you hear that? I don't know if you can hear that

Slop Hang on That sounds like semen That was a semen experience Now if you've got a bag of burger rings Pop those open and give those a sniff And you'll smell semen Really?

Well No, I don't do it with milk I don't do the oats with milk Because milk doesn't always agree with me I'll fall short of calling myself lactose intolerant You get a bit tooty, don't do it with milk. I don't do the oats with milk because milk doesn't always agree with me. I'll fall short of calling myself lactose intolerant. You get a bit tooty, don't you? I get a little tooty, but I just don't like the milk. So I just put in, up to the line on the outside of the bag,

boiling water and then it only needs 40 seconds in the microwave. So you're putting the bag in the microwave? No, no, no, no. You pour the... Okay, sorry. Somebody grew up with a butler making them breakfast every morning. So what you do is you put the bag in the microwave? No, no, no, no. You pour the... Okay, sorry. Somebody grew up with a butler making them breakfast every morning. So what you do is you put the oats in. Was there a breakfast buffet at private school?

The way that Bernie used to make them when we were kids. Bernie! Bernie Hen is hungry. What would Madame like for breakfast? I want eggy bready. Right-o. And then you pour the oats in and then you use the bag to measure out the water. You fill it up to the line.

There's literally a line on the bag that says water to here, fill to here, and then you pour that in. But you said boiling water, so you're getting a tiny paper sack and filling it with hot boiling water. I burnt fingers when I was first learning it, but now I've perfected the technique. And then you pour it in, and then you stir it. Now, that's a 40-second job, but if you're doing that with milk up to the line, just over a minute.

But you can't overdo it, and it goes gloopy. But great foliable fiber, a way to start the day. I would use this to make a fence, a brick fence. Hold the bricks together, but a mortar. Have you finished it? No. You ungrateful bitch. Bernie went to so much bathroom.

Who's going to do all my dishes? I suppose I will. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Thanks, Rachel. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Three minutes past six. I hit a button.

You hit a button. I couldn't hear you and I went in full panic mode. I'm back. No, figuring out the buttons. Figuring out all the buttons. Proud of you. Thank you, babe. It's an on and off button.

Okay. I just think you're setting the bar too low for her. That was a very varying response to my achievement. I showed Hayley yesterday morning how to turn down the loud music that sometimes she doesn't like. That was the best message. Because often I am here first and I get in and the music is blasting. I don't know why.

And I just sit here in the dark going, can someone hurry up and arrive? And yesterday the air conditioning was broken. The message was like, what was it? It is stinking hot in here and I can't turn down LAB. Will someone please help? So this is the turn down. That's the turn down. And that's your on off.

That's the on off. Yep. Good stuff. We are ready to go. The top six is coming up on the show. Yeah, the top six reasons I'd be great as a stand-in ambulance driver. Oh, no, thank you. And the, what's this variant called?

Omicron. Outbreak, yeah. So they're saying that they may have to use civilians to help out. Man, man. Woo! But ambulance drivers, are they going to have paramedics in the back? You're just going to drive? That's the thing.

If numbers are down, you'll need the professional in the back. That's why I just said ambulance driver. And I know that paramedics don't like being called drivers because they are people that save lives. They save lives. Very skilled people. They are a paramedic. But no, you will simply be a driver. Okay.

Scott Morrison would be nasty. He probably reckons teenagers could have a whack at this. Why not? 14-year-olds. If you've got your learners, you just need your mum or dad next to you and before 10pm. Man, it's about to get wild, eh? You can feel it bubbling in the air, eh?

Yeah, I mean, we've all seen what's happened in Australia. Has everybody stocked up? Have you got your panadol? We got a kit. We completed the kit yesterday. Your gloves. We got the new code of masks. Where did you get the posh masks from?

We just ordered... Oh, they're all gone. This is it. Sade made a reorder of the masks last week, and then all the news is that these aren't good enough anymore. Yeah, so we got the new ones that are approved. Yeah. They're quite full on. You need a UB40 or something.

Yeah. With a UB40. Well, I'm taking the old cloth masks and using them as sort of a testicle hammock when I'm spray tanning. Lovely. What do you hook them to? I just hold it with one finger. Okay.

Loop. Yeah, yeah. The genitals sit in the mask part and then the loop, I hold with a finger. That's what I like about you. You're always reusing and recycling. Yeah, and then I sand and I slowly turn for a full spray tan. That's beautiful. And then it always exfoliates the elbows.

It's a lovely image. Otherwise you get tiger stripes, don't you? You do. Tiger stripes with your elbows. Coming up on the show, free fuel again this morning, six, seven o'clock and eight. Listen out for the activator. Get through, play Zed Empty Tank.

Coming up, I've got some, I guess you could call it financial advice, actually. Oh, okay. A young mother has cleared all of her debt and is putting her kids through school, and I'll tell you how she's going to do it. All right, next on the show, though, three in five adults can't get through the day

without doing this one thing. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Imagine Dragons, Enemy on ZM, Fletchvorn and Hayley. It's nine minutes past six. Well, a study's been done. Imagine Dragons, Enemy on ZM Fleetspawn and Hayley. It's nine minutes past six. Well, a study's been done. Three in five adults can't get through the day without sugar.

Oh. That sugary hit. Yeah. Whether it's a treat, some lollies, chocolate, some coffee, or a sugary energy drink. Do you know what mine is? It's fizzy Coke bottles. You know the lollies? Yeah. I can't. I just. Do you know what mine is? It's fizzy Coke bottles. You know the lollies? Yeah.

I can't, I just. Do you have a big supply? No, I shan't. Otherwise, I'll just eat them all day, every day. Yeah, see, I. But that's my vice. I'm like you. I can't have stuff at my house.

No, no, no, no. Like, if I need it, I'll go buy it and eat it all. And like, get it in and just deal with that. Yeah. But I'm a little bit like this. If I'm really hungry, I always crave savoury. But after every savoury, I need a sweet. So I have a breakfast and then I need a little breakfast dessert.

And then I have lunch and I want a little lunch dessert. And then I have dinner. What's your breakfast dessert? Well, I went for a sweet smoothie today. So I did a two-foot. Right. Right. So that took both of us.

It was a chocolate-based. Yeah, okay. So I don't need a sweet on top of that now. See, we're the opposite in our house and our kids are even like it. There's still an Easter egg from last Easter. What? Like, how crazy is that? I would have eaten that at the weekend. That wouldn't survive in our house.

And they just don't seem to worry about it. And there's this jar of lollies that never gets... Are you all psychopaths? No, because like last night Sade said, I need a little sweetie. Yeah. And then she went to the cupboard and she didn't even consider the jar of lollies. Oh.

What's wrong with her? I don't know. That's really weird. She can't want a sweetie then. She can't want that sort of sweetie. We're not a huge lolly, we don't run a huge lolly based economy in our family. We're not like lolly centric. I'm very lolly based. Biscuits though. Oh yeah. We're not a huge lolly we don't run a huge lolly based economy in our family. We're not like lolly centric. I'm very lolly based. Biscuits though.

We'll go through biscuits. The minute that bag's open it's pretty much empty. So three fifths of people can't get through the day without it. I mean it makes sense. There's sugar everywhere. There's sugar in our burger buns. Do you remember what was that um Oh yeah that's good.

That's worth it. What was that movie remember? Everybody watched that's good. That's worth it. What was that movie? Remember? Everybody watched that movie and then everyone stopped eating sugar? Oh, wasn't it called Sugar? No. White Death? What was it called?

That Sugar Film. I was just about to Google the Sugar Film. It's That Sugar Film. That Sugar Film. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That got everybody all hyped up for a while there, didn't it? Everyone was all jazzed about it. No sugar.

Yeah. And then they forgot that stevia tastes like shit. No, it doesn't taste like shit. It makes you. Does it? Oh, man. You know those,

what's that brand? It's not, certainly it's not Double D's. Double D's? The boobies? There's a brand of artificial sweetener lollies and it always says on the back, it's a brand of artificial sweetener lollies,

and it always says on the back. It's a white and pink, and it's nodding her head, white and pink brand. Yeah. But it's the same with Haribo beers. Ever had a few too many Haribo beers? Far out. Whoa, it's evacuation station.

Get out of my way. Yeah, the Haribo beers absolutely wreak havoc in there. Yeah, and it really stuffs up your guts. I remember I was doing a live show. It was a solo show, so it was just me talking. Not a lot of noise to cover the noise of my stomach. And I had a whole bag of these, I'm sure it's double Ds, lollies. And I was acting and it was going... That was the sound.

What do you do when you're in a solo show and you need to shit your pants? Brace. Brace, brace, brace. Engage the pain. Make it part of the performance. There's a woman in the UK who's come up with a creative way to help her family live the life they want to live. She's a mother of three.

One is a newborn. They had $30,000 worth of debt. They could never take a holiday. They were working weekends, working their little patooties off to try to provide her family with the life they wanted. And it wasn't working. And then she came up with an idea. She started, and this is not a new idea, an OnlyFans page. Okay. And we've heard these stories before of people making incredible amounts of money just sharing slightly saucy photos on

OnlyFans. But the way she's made her money instantly, very quickly she paid off her entire amount of debt, is by making videos of herself pumping breast milk. And not in any particularly

sort of sexy way. Right. She's not selling the milk. Not selling the milk? Because don't bodybuilders do that? They like a bit of that. They love the natural juice. So she makes about $13,000 a month selling videos of herself pumping breast milk.

She does wear some lingerie, but she doesn't do anything other than pump breast milk. And she's filling up bottles. Filling up bottles. And guys are like, subscribe. She said it's actually quite wholesome. Most people just like the sound of the... The milky machine. The milky machine.

Yeah. And the visual of her wearing this nursing bra, you know, the ones that have the machine attached, and they pay money just to watch her pump her, do her natural thing. I wonder if your dad's missing a trick here, Vaughan. What, setting up an OnlyFans in the cow shed? In the cow shed, yeah.

Very loud. With the sound of the machines of people like that. They are very loud, though, because that little machine that milks a woman, that doesn't feel right. No, it's milking. It's milking. That little one person

milking machine only requires that little amount of suction. Eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat, eat. And that is quite relaxing. Whereas the cow shed. But the vacuum required to do a 12-a-side hearing bone.

Yep. Four, you know, and four teats on each one. So four times 12. Yeah, but it's four times 12 the money, Vaughn. Four times the money. And Ian could wear some lingerie. I don't think that's a good idea. That's just...

Purely on occupational safety and health. No, wear the gumboots though as well. Still wear the gumboots. No, but you'd want the covering. Why? Well, your lingerie would get dirty because there's cow shit everywhere. Oh, but that's just a business expense. Acidic urine, that would work.

What are you saying? A fresh pair of lingerie every week. Because the people want to, if they're getting your videos, they want something different each day. It doesn't have to be expensive either. Pop to Cotton On, get a little lacy number. Okay, well, I mean, I can put this forward. Cotton On Body or Cotton On?

This might sweeten the deal, Cotton On Body. This might sweeten the deal. One of body. This might sweeten the deal. One of her followers offered her 100,000 pounds. Jesus. So what's that, 200K? Yeah. Creeps have money. To breastfeed him.

Creeps have money. To breastfeed him. Creeps have money. Straight to the teat. Would you do that? She said it was an eye-watering sum. For 100,000 pounds, what is that, $200,000? $200,000. He can suckwatering sum. For 100,000 pounds, what is that, 200,000 new dollars?

You can suck on my tip for 200,000 dollars. I'll even pop down to bloody bras and things. Never mind, I'm willing to spend a little bit of money. Spend money to make money. You're going lonely lingerie. No, no, no, I'm not going lonely. Oh, man, they're cancelled. They are cancelled. They are lunatics.

What do I do? It's hard for me to say because I know that, you know, when you become a mother, the breast milk is a sacred thing, you know, and is like a very loving thing. So maybe that would change my opinion. I'm not a mother. Hell yeah, I would for $200,000 breast milk a man. Absolutely.

Yeah. Yeah, maybe. But listen to that. She's living a comfortable life now. Good on her. And happy with her family. She's paid off all of their debts. They're having holidays and the life they dreamed of.

And all she's got to do is pop down and have it on. She's not going to be able to come, she's not going to be able to have off season. She's going to have to keep milking. No, just get some powdered milk. You put the machine on still. Just put the machine on and just shake it up. I probably heard if nothing was coming out. Yeah.

That's what I'm saying. The minute you stop, but if you can keep production going. Yeah, or just have another baby. Have another baby. And number four to the list. Yeah, but then you've got to stop. You've got to have a downtime to get pregnant again, don't you? I mean, that's not 100%, but it helps, right,

to get back into the fertility thing to stop breastfeeding. All farmers need a dry season so they can go to Rarotonga. Yeah, it takes six weeks, yeah. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the top six. Hey. How many Omicron cases in the public were there yesterday?

Eight. Eight. Yeah. Five in Auckland. Yeah. Two in Palmy. One in Nelson. What about the Mochueco?

Were they counted the day before? Yeah, day before. Yeah. Standby for a bloody Mochueco-based cluster. God, it's happening, guys. It's about to all bloody bubble over. There's a whole lot of things to think about in this. Looking to overseas outbreaks.

I mean, we've got a better vaccination rate. Yeah. But a lot of countries, we've held it off. Maybe we're prepared because we've done the working from home thing. We didn't overload the hospitals with Delta. True, true. And the vaccination rates came up in that time, which means less hospitalisations. Yeah.

So, you know, we've done pretty good. But we've got some, you know. There are some things to think about. Some obstacles ahead we're going to have to hunker down. Now, one of the things is that it has been suggested that civilians may have to drive ambulances. So I've got an article here. Somebody from ST John says if we experience... That's pronounced St John. St John, the ambulance company.

They say, if we experience extreme demand, we may bring on ambulance assistants who have been trained to drive an ambulance, safety lift patients, and perform effective CPR and partner them with a qualified ambulance assistant. Can you CPR? No.

Borny? I'll give it a go. What Can you CPR? No. Barney? I'll give it a go. What do you do? How hard is it? Isn't it? Everybody fucking in there. Everybody's talking and you're staying alive. Staying alive.

Yeah. Oh, there you go. Or is it a bit quicker than staying alive? I can't. I just go a bit quicker than staying alive because I think it's a little bit quicker than staying alive now, right? No, I heard it was slower. Slower than staying alive. Well, can you just find out quicker than staying alive now, right? No, I heard it was slower. Slower than... Well, can you

just find out before we have to man our ambulance? Woman. Isn't it Darude Sandstorm? home so that they can just get up in the morning and be ready and go straight to their ambulance to work. You'd hope you had off-street parking. I often think, I've got huge respect for paramedics and not just because I love that Australian show Paramedics. Oh, you do love that show, don't you? Where you see their personality but also

their dedication to the work. Yeah. I'm crying thinking about it. I love it when they have to cut off someone's really expensive jeans with those little cute scissors. I know, a pair of Subies or something. Yeah, yeah. Why are those scissors so... I understand why they're hooked on the end because you don't want to catch skin, but why are they so short?

Well, you're not sewing, Vaughn. You don't need sewing scissors. I want a long pair of mum's sewing scissors with a bit to stop the skin on the end. Yeah, maybe. You have to ask. Imagine getting your glide on through a good pair of jeans. Oh, yes. Oh, you just start a little thing and then you rip.

Oh, rip it right up. You start a slit and you rip. Rip it up. Love that. Anyway, so it might have to happen. And here are the top six reasons I'd be great as a stand-in ambulance driver. Okay. Number six.

I'm not afraid to have a little nang from the big tank at the red light. The big nang. The big nang. The big nang. The big nang tank. Yeah. Have a little Nang Nang So for what percentage

Of the drive Are you Nanging? Say we're on a Five minute drive From my house to the hospital Well you don't Nang and drive No I'll Nang when I get there Oh okay

Cause they While you're unloading I'll just be like That was intense We're gonna go No I'm good Where we going? Jeebus Number five on the list Of the top six reasons Be born, we're going to go. No, I'm good. Way to go.

Jeebus. Number five on the list of the top six reasons I'd be great as a stand-in ambulance driver. I would look after the ambulance because on the weekend I'd take it camping in Waipu. But you just said you get to take them home. You get to take them home, yeah. You get to take them home and you get weekends off, right? You get weekends off. Do they have the stretchers in them? Or you'd be able to use those for the beds.

But do they have like a cute little awning that comes out the back so you can... Yeah. Probably. Yeah, because when you see a St. John's ambulance at like a community event, they've got a little shelter looking little pop-up. Okay, good. Shelter, that'd be good. Yeah, good, okay. That'd be good.

Put the barbecue in the back of where you go. Yeah. Okay, yeah. Number four on the list of the top six reasons I'd be great as a stand-in ambulance driver. I'm not afraid to put a car through a car wash. So the ambulance will always look nice and clean. Can you put a tall car like that through a car wash? Would the roof one get a bit full noise?

I don't know. I don't know how to find out. Do you know the other day I saw a lady. She was pulling into the car park building. And she had roof racks on a van and she'd hit the thing that comes down, you know, the bar? The dangly, yeah.

The height dangly bar thing. So she was getting out of her van and putting a blanket under the dangly bar so it wouldn't scratch the rest of the van while she drove through. I've done it with a rental. I took a rental van on a marching trip into a supermarket. My mum was like, go! And I was like, yeah, it'll be fine. I took a rental van on a marching trip into a supermarket.

My mum was like, go. And I was like, yeah, it'll be fine. And then we just heard this. And it was the roof. All you can do is reverse out. Because insurance often doesn't cover roof damage, right? It doesn't. Oh, my.

How much did that cost? They didn't look at it. Because it's too tall. They never looked. They didn't look. Someone else got the blame. We never got charged for it. Oh, wow.

Why do I tell my secrets on air? Oh, you'll learn. Yeah. Number three on the list of the top six reasons I'd be great as a standing ambulance driver. I know a shortcut. Oh, you. Oh, here we go. I know a shortcut.

Like that shortcut when we were going to the ferry and we ended up on a gravel road in a camper. It was still a shortcut. It was less distance. It took about the same time, but it was less distance because it was a gravel road in a camper. It was still a shortcut. It was less distance. It took about the same time, but it was less distance because it was a gravel road. That was fun too. There's something very adventurous about that. Number two on the list of the top six reasons

I'd be great as a stand-in ambulance driver. I always manage to find time to pop through the drive-thru. Again, I don't know if an ambulance can go through a drive-thru, can it? If you're about to die, you want a good meal in your belly. Don't you? Yeah. I'll be on the way to the hospital. They'll be on the road sandstorm in the back.

I'll be like, what do you guys want? Nuggets. I'll be like, yeah, get that boy some nugs. Let's get some nugs in that mouth. And number one on the list of the top six reasons I'd be great as a standard ambulance driver. I'm very siren heavy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll never see the lights

without the siren. Yeah. Any emergency vehicle, fire, police, St John's, a Hyundai that's the lead vehicle in a truck that's moving a house. I don't think they have sirens.

I would put a siren on if that was me. Yeah, me too. You'll never go past, you'll never be disappointed by seeing the lights and thinking, oh, I'm about to hear the sirens and then you don't hear the s me. Yeah, me too. You'll never go past, you'll never be disappointed by seeing the lights and thinking, oh, I'm about to hear the sirens, and then you don't hear the sirens.

Yeah. That's never going to happen with me at the wheel. It's lights and sirens. That's a combo that always goes together. Yeah. Always goes together. Regardless of where I am, suburban do not give a damn. Wake you up at 2 a.m.

It's sirens and lights, baby. That's today's Top 6. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Went to the gym yesterday after work. Thanks. I can tell, too. Exactly the amount of courage I needed. Jacked.

Yeah, just ripped. Now, on the board with you, they're always writing stuff. Do you have a whiteboard? It's not a whiteboard. It's a Perspex board. It's a big Perspex thing. Right. And you can pick up like a chalk pen and they'll write.

Like a CrossFit gym. You know how they've got the wads? What are the wads? Work out of the day. Oh, no. And they write it up. Sometimes it's like a challenge, like a rowing challenge, and you put your name and how long it took you to do 500 metres. Sometimes it's like a push-up challenge. Sometimes it's just a challenge, like a rowing challenge, and you put your name and how long it took you to do 500 metres.

Sometimes it's like a push-up challenge. Sometimes it's just a range of stuff. At the moment, it's 2022 goals. And as a member, you're encouraged to write your goals on the board. Now, I won't do that. I can't ever imagine a world in which you get to the gym and walk up to a board and go, I'll write board.

Abs. Abs. Yeah. Yeah. Because then everybody's going to be like in, you know, April. Wear those abs. Wear those abs. Those abs aren't happening. Yeah.

But underneath it, there was only one thing written because it was new yesterday. Okay. So only one person had written one thing. I'm so embarrassed for you. And what, this is their goal for the year? This is their goal. And now it didn't say, I would like. Okay. So only one person had written one thing. I'm so embarrassed for you. And what, this is their goal for the year? This is their goal. And now it didn't say I would like. It just said two words. Did it have a name? No name beside

it. It's an anonymous goal. Okay. Fat dumper. P-H P-H-A-T space dumper. D-U-M-P-E-T Right Space Dumper D-U-M-P-E-R

Fat dumper Fat dumper Now I looked at that for a bit And I was like Fat dumper Fat dumper And I So I thought

But it said P-H Which is the good fat I thought people went to the gym To lose fat But not fat No but some people Want to put on some Yeah

So then that's what I thought. Is it the dumper? Yeah, the bootay. It's the bootay, yeah. To take a dump is to poo. So the dumper is the buttocks. But is it the dumper

from the action? The verb has been turned into the noun. Yes. Right. That's my dumper. That's the dumper. Sit your dumper down and listen to me.

Yeah. I'd never thought about dumper. Right. So they just want a bigger bouton. They want a fat dumper. They want a big butt. I mean, most people would put like grow the glutes. Yeah.

But fat dumper gets to the point, doesn't it? It does, yeah. Shape the hiney. Yeah. Plump the dump. Oh, I'm writing. Today I'm writing plump the dump. Plump the dump. Plump the dump.

Right. Plump the dump. But is that across the board? Do you want a plump dump? I wouldn't say no to a plump. When I was a kid, I had a fat ass. Did you? I don't know what it was, but yeah, I had a big...

Now, in the 90s, it wasn't cool to have a plump dump. It wasn't cool to have a shapely bottom, especially as like a 13-year-old boy. But I had a dump on me. I did. I had a real... Did you really have a bootay? We're going to hear from somebody I went to school with

about my big dumper. Yeah, right. And I don't know where it came from either. I wasn't like squatting, playing hockey. So maybe that was a lot of like lunging and like getting low. But I think just genetically I had a pokey out ass. I spent so much of my teenage years like in a posture that tried to pull the ass in. And now, of course, I've got no ass to speak of.

With your fat dumper when you were a teenager, did you have a little snatched little waist as well? I did. That really showed it off? Yes. It came in, especially if you looked at me, profile. Padonk. You would see the padonk and then it would come into the small of the back. And now it's gone.

And now I don't have a fat dumper to speak of. When did this happen? Puberty. Did you get rid of it? I don't know. I think it was like late teens, early twenties that it really happened.

But I don't know why, but yeah, my ass was like, not at the time, but like looking back, fat dumper. I had a fat dumper. You had a fat dumper. I was bootylicious before the song was released. Yeah.

Well, maybe in 95, six years. Or could you find this I was bootylicious like before the song was released yeah like a good four okay well maybe 95 like six years or could you find this anonymous gym goer who's got the goal of the fat dumper maybe some tips

I reckon a lot I mean that's very on brand now with fitness isn't it for women in particular fat dumpers everybody's just doing squats everybody's just doing squats

and the ones where they sit on the um yes the thrusts. What does that do? Works your dumper. Your glutes.

Does that work the dumper? Nice and fat. And your back of your... What are these things called? Hammies. Hammies, yeah. Yeah, so you lie with your back on the bench and you put the barbell across the vaginal area.

And then... You get little bruises on your hip bones. Yeah, right. And that is, I think I might know who wants the fat dumper. Because it was pretty fresh. Yep. And there was a girl doing that thing. Is that like quite, you go to a woman's only part of the gym, eh?

I do remove myself from the larger part of lessons. Because I was using a piece of, I was using the pull-up bar. Now, line of sight is that straight at the bench where they do the fat dumper. Are you a gym pest? It is my worst nightmare that I am considered a gym, I am so freaked out. Like, sometimes, you know when you're like,

I don't know, but on the treadmill, sometimes I get a, like, you need to stretch your neck, so you turn one way. I turn and I see someone and I'm terrified. I'm like, they think I'm a gym pest. So I'll go back the other way and hold it longer the other way. Now, if someone's on that side as well, guys or girls, I don't want anyone to think I'm looking at them at all.

It is my worst nightmare that one day someone at my gym goes, hey, can I just grab a quick word? I'll just be like, oh, my God. They'll be like like somebody just said somebody just said when you were doing pull ups you were watching them do the vag thrust

yeah and I'm like I wasn't it's the only place you tried looking any other way than straight ahead where am I supposed to look

because the hip thrust is a it's a very personal move it's a personal move and you tuck it at the top I know I don't want to I don't want to see it

hump the ears I'm glad you need some blinkers. Hump the ear. Some blinkers. But then that would make it look even worse because I'm looking straight at him anyway. I'm such a sex pest. I'm such a gym pest.

I don't want to see anything but your fat dumper exercises. It's my worst nightmare. It is my worst nightmare. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. You might be thinking that Squid Game was the biggest TV show of the year last year. Came out in September. That's what we were told.

Yeah. And between September and the end of 2021, it racked up an impressive 16.4 billion minutes of viewing. That's insane, isn't it? Yeah. Especially when you think about how violent it was. I know, it was so dark. The storyline was very dark.

Very political. Yeah, yeah. A lot of traits, political, gory, scary. That many billions of minutes, cumulatively Means 31,202 years I could do it Yeah

So 31,000 years That's insane isn't it However it wasn't the most popular Because It came out late in the year It came out late in the year And the show that bit it Had it's 6th and final season

So it got really popular It was just on Netflix. It wasn't an original Netflix, I don't believe, but they had six seasons to watch. So what's that? What show is that? It was Lucifer. Oh.

Now, I watched the first couple of episodes when it first came out a long time ago, and I believe he's Satan, right? And he's up to shenanigans. Jared's watched like five seasons of it. Producer Jared. Is that a general idea? And he becomes a detective?

Yeah, he's the devil, but he's on holiday. He's taking a break. It sounds silly. Wait, so he's on a break. The devil's on a break, but he also solves some cases. Yeah, he's on a break from, he's on a holiday from hell. So he comes up to Earth to do

some detective stuff. He works on his holidays. Different sort of work, though. It just sounds so silly. Is that really the number one watched Netflix show? Yeah, so that totaled 18.3 billion minutes, which equates to about 35,000 years.

But again, more episodes. More seasons. That's the vibe. So less people watched it, but they watched more of it. More of it. Have you guys seen that show that's had a resurgence? It's in the top 10 manifest. No. I? It's in the top 10. Manifest? No.

I saw that yesterday in the top 10. It looks very losty. And apparently that's been like, it's three or four seasons. And Netflix has kind of revived this show that was like kind of lost on 3D Air TV in the US. Yeah, apparently it's very binge worthy. I've heard. I don't recognize any of the actors in it. I'm halfway through the latest Ozark. Don't say anything I haven't gotten into. I haven't recognize any of the actors in it. I'm halfway through the latest Ozark.

Don't say anything I haven't gotten into. I haven't even gotten into Afterlife yet. I'm still, I hate to say it, but I am watching in just like that. There's sex in the city. Oh, really? It's so bad. Dongs, eh?

You were telling me. There are lots of dongs. Schlongs. Schlongs and dongs. Schlongs and dongs and bobs and all bits. Yeah. Okay. That's not why I'm watching it.

I'll just catch the highlights. I'll just catch the highlights package. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Play ZM's ZMD Tank. Tyler joins us this morning to play ZMD Tank. Good morning, Tyler. Hey, how's it going?

Good, good. What's the fuel tank on at the moment? Are we full? Oh, yeah, she's looking pretty empty at the moment. Pretty rough. So it's a good time in the week. All right, well, let's see if we can hook you up with some free fuel. At any stage, the fuel pump could just cut you off and buzz out.

But if you would like the dollar amount, just say stop before you get cut off. Okay. All right. Good luck. Let's go. $10. $85. $110.

$130. $130. What were you shooting for? What was going to be your magic number? Oh, 150, I was looking around. So 130 wasn't enough? I thought it was going to come up. I thought I'd had one more.

Well, that's the thing. Sometimes it's cut off at like 80. Sometimes it's cut off at like, yeah, 300. Yeah. Well, that's the thing. Sometimes it's cut off at like 80. Sometimes it's cut off at like, yeah, 300. Yeah. Well, unfortunately, Tyler, yeah, we've missed out, but we do have another chance for you to fill up at 8 o'clock with ZMD Tank. Coming up, I've got the personality trait that'll get you more lover lovers,

more romantic partners. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. or romantic partners. I've got a hot little study here for you about the dating world and how you may be able to get more long-term and short-term lovers, partners, fun times. Okay, do you need more? I'm sick of having just one Looking to sort of expand your portfolio?

Yeah I'm an investor Yeah So they've looked at a certain personality trait That is most alluring to people And therefore attracts more partners It's about the number of partners you're having And that personality trait is

Playfulness more partners. It's about the number of partners you're having. And that personality trait is playfulness. How would you describe playfulness? Like, examples. Playfulness is like a whimsical kind of more carefree nature. As opposed to someone a bit more serious, I guess.

Someone a bit more stern. Okay. And there's lots of reasons as to why people find that one of the most desirable qualities, which therefore attracts the most lovers. For men who are more playful, it is often a signal that they're non-aggressive. Oh, yeah. Which I guess men can sort of be seen as sometimes, a bit more of the aggressive gender. Yeah, because stern people, driven, can come across a little bit like no nonsense and grumpy.

Yeah, and then the interesting one is for women who come across as playful, it's sort of a sign of youthfulness and thus fertility. Oh, so that's the old primal attraction. It's the primal attraction. So going like if I'm sort of feeling young and whatnot, I've still got plenty of life of living and plenty more babies. Right. A few eggs on board.

For holding my womb. Yeah. Playfulness. Lightheartedness. Lightheartedness. Intellectual playfulness. There's all these different types of playfulness I didn't realise.

Intellectual playfulness. What's that? Crosswords and stuff. The tendency to enjoy playing with ideas and solving problems. That's probably why everybody goes a bit weird around you when you're playing Wordle. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Doing your newspaper crosswords. Everyone gets a little bit weak at the knees when I'm three guesses in and I've got a couple of green squares on Wordle. There's light-hearted playfulness. I think I'm a light-hearted playfulness. The tendency to see life as a game and not worry too much about the future.

Yeah. Is that an attractive trait in a person? I'm running for the hills. It is fun, right? But then, like, later on, if they can't be serious about some stuff, it might not be long-term as much fun. Oh, piss off, Siri. She thought I said Siri when I said serious.

No, serious. And the other type of playfulness that they measured was whimsical playfulness that assesses the tendency to find enjoyment in strange situations. Oh, I like that. I like when shit's going really weird and fleets start smoking out. I just enjoy riding the waves of chaos. That's the one that in the study they did, they said it's for women who like men and men who like women.

But lighthearted playfulness and intellectual playfulness are attractive traits from women in men. But men like whimsical playfulness in women. They're like a chaotic woman. They're like a bohemian little runabout who doesn't wear shoes. They do, don't they? Yeah, there's caveats.

There's caveats, which of course is, can you make a decision though? Yeah. There won't be playfulness, but can you pay the bills? The whimsical, as you put it,

barefooted bohemian. Is it the thrill of the chase as well? Yeah, I guess so. Because this looks at both attracting long-term and short-term partners. But you have more of them if you're playful.

Well, I think if we want to talk to one person here about the success in attracting a short-term partner, we look no further than Carl Peter Fletcher, who attracts absolutely no shortage of short-term partners. It's because I'm whimsically playful. I don't wear shoes to the supermarket. Are you whimsically playful? More than intellectually playful?

I'm certainly not intellectually playful. Are you light-hearted playful? You think life is just a game? No. You don't think too much about the future? He's a big stern daddy. He's a big stern daddy. He's a big stern daddy and he specializes in people with horrendous father issues.

You are out of control, Warren Smith. See, this is me enjoying my whimsical. It is, it is. Play. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn, and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn, and Hayley. Silly little boys. Silly little boys. It is so silly, silly little pole.

Do you believe in horoscopes? God, you can just hear the cynicism in your voice there. Aquarius, Pisces, Aries, Taurus, crabby one. Cancer. Scorpiscorps. Libra. Waggle baggle. The tampon.

Which one's the tampon? That's Libra. That's Libra. The hot twins. Gemini. Gemini are the hot twins, eh? Yeah. What ones have I missed? Which one's the two? That's Libra That's Libra The Hot Twins Gemini Gemini are the Hot Twins, eh? Yeah What ones have I missed?

Lion guy Scorpion? I see a scorpion Yeah Saggy bum Saggy bum Anyway, there's a whole lot of horoscopes I'm more of a fan of the Chinese Zodiac

The one where you get an animal And it's only because I'm a dog Oh, right I wouldn't be so canon if I say a rat I'm more of a fan of the Chinese Zodiac. The one where you get an animal. And it's only because I'm a dog. Oh, right. I wouldn't be so canine if I say a rat. I'm a snake. Ooh. 1989. That's a good one.

That's a snake. Yeah. You. What are you? 1970. 1970. I'll fuck this off. I am not.

I'm just looking. I'm a goat. You're the goat. No, the goats are good. Greatest of all time. Greatest of all time. Okay, yes. What are you, 81?

82. I'm a dog. I was the very start of the very end of one of them. It's Chinese New Year. It fluctuates a little bit. I've got a daughter who's a dragon, and because Shadow's dad is of Chinese descent, although from Thailand,

that was a big deal. That was a massive deal. He had a granddaughter that was a dragon. Was he proud of that or ashamed of that? Huge, hugely proud. Would he have been ashamed if his granddaughter was a rat? Or a pig? No, his daughter's a rat.

Oh, okay. Sade's a rat. It's a fun one. Yeah, right. Because you get to mock your friends that aren't the coolest animals. Okay. Okay, that is, Okay that is I like that

But you don't believe in Do the Chinese Zodiac Do they have in their local newspaper Like today you've come into some money If you're a dog Yeah So there's But it goes

Animal And then Four elements Oh yeah So like I think I'm a I think I'm a wood dog I'm a wood dog So it's a load of rubbish

Like the other ones Yeah yeah Totally Totally Yeah So do you believe in horoscopes And we didn't We didn't specify I'm a wood dog. So it's a load of rubbish like the other ones. Totally. So do you believe in horoscopes? And we didn't specify these. You know the horoscopes? I say our horoscopes.

The horoscopes, like the month of the year, the ones I just said before. What's the Greek origins? I've got no idea. What's the origins of horoscopes? Didn't someone just start them in a newspaper to fill up some columns? Or it must have come from a culture. The Egyptians? I don't know. It must have been somebody.

The origins of horoscopes. Just imagine Cleopatra in a bath reading her horoscope. Yeah, because it's all based on the stars. Cleopatra in a bath, but she's reading it off a stone tablet. And if she drops it, it sinks. Yeah, it is It is Greek It's a Greek

The origins of It became popular in Egypt Which at the time Was under the control Of a dynasty Of Greek kings Oh okay So do you believe

In horoscopes Do you believe In horoscopes No I do not 70% of people said no Yeah 30% of people said no. Yeah. 30% of people said yes. Sensible people.

70 to the 70%. And the other 30% just latch onto the vageties. The vageties. Yeah, well, I'm going to have a look. Today's Libra. I'm a Libra. Yeah. I'm such a Libra too.

I'm such a Libra. Today, one of my horoscopes today, good day to start with some healthcare. A healthcare routine. But every day is a good day to start withoscopes today. Good day to start with some healthcare. A healthcare routine. But every day is a good day to start with healthcare for everybody. Your savings might dwindle

to a bare minimum. I bought some new shoes yesterday. Again, everybody. Face the financial issues. Okay, I might read these off here. Libra family. Your family is your teacher. No.

Career. Learn some new techniques. I learned about the button. Oh my God, that's right. Horoscopes are right. I learned about the button. Oh, my God. That's right. Horoscope. All right. I learned about the button at work today and the volume button. Uh-huh.

Major impacts on your professional life during the day. Maybe I'm going to get fired today. That could happen. So people responded as well. They didn't just vote. They thought, I'll chuck you a response. Steph said, I think they're a load of bullshit, even though I have mine tattooed on the back of my neck. Oh didn't just vote. They thought, I'll chuck you a response. Steph said, I think they're a load of bullshit even though I have mine

tattooed on the back of my neck. Oh no, babe. It was my first tattoo and I can't see it so who cares? Your hairdresser. Leah writes, no way, dude.

I honestly think if I was born in any other month I'd still hate people as much as I do. Ain't no sky, ain't no stars in the sky changing that. That's a fair call.

That's a genetic thing, isn't it? Yeah. Apparently not believing in horoscopes is such a Capricorn thing. Because I've met so many people born in January that are Capricorns who couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery when you're born. Doesn't give you traits or skills. Yeah. So that's fair, fair.

She's a strong denier there. Soph kind of sums it up. I only believe in them when I like what it says about my day. Absolutely. Yes, totally. Okay. So the majority of people, 70% of those surveyed in Silly Little Poll said, no, we don't believe in horoscopes.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I have a question about discount codes on websites. Ask away, sir. And I think if you run a website, you might be able to answer this because it's just something I wondered yesterday when I was buying some protes, brah. Yeah, the gains. I can see the gains.

Some gains, yeah, some protes. I was low, so I was like, well, I'll do a quick order. And it got to the checkout. Did you get some pre-workout? Nah, I didn't get some pre-workout, brah. I don't play with that. Vaughan's had a bad experience. He had a free sample and nearly had a heart attack. Yeah, it was horrible.

An old lady thought I was on methamphetamine. You basically are. I know. It really felt like I've never done meth but if it feels like that. Yeah. No thanks. If there had been an axe in my vicinity, I would have used it for nefarious purpose. All sorts of reasons.

So I get to the checkout of this protein powder, this website. Yeah, bruh. Yeah, bruh. It's got the classic coupon box. Oh, yeah. And I don't have a discount code. So I'm like, well, I'll just try a couple.

Try a couple options. Where do you start? This protein with this website used to have a couple of codes. They didn't work. And then I tried like 10 off. And then I tried like welcome 10. Oh, I love welcome 10. Yes.

Welcome 10 is an absolute hoot. Like sale 5, sale 10. Summer 15. Yes. Yes. So I'm trying like 15 and nothing's worked. I even try like. Did you try gains?

Gains 20? No, I didn't try. Did you try Proats Bra 15? No, that didn Did you try Gaines? Gaines 20? Nah, I didn't try- Did you try Protez Bra 15? Nah, that didn't work. Gaines with a Z 20? Nah, that didn't work. Okay. And-

Spot Me Bro 15? Gaines on Gaines? Yeah. No, none of these work. Fat Dumper? Fat Dumper 15? I did not try Fat Dumper. Glute specific protein.

Yeah. Fat Dumper. And nothing's working. And then I'm like, imagine if there's someone sitting in the office. Receiving them. Receiving a printout of all the codes that people try on websites that don't work. Yeah. How embarrassing would that be?

In America, they have, because I've always gone, I'll go like whatever brand or shop I'm shopping at. And I'll try to Google like country road discount codes. But in America. But there's sites that are just absolute. There's sites. But they seem to just either be mostly duds. Or just mostly American companies. I'm like, I don't want this. But you've got to just put in a basic name.

Yeah. 10. So, like, Hayley 10. So you're saying you're rolling the dice on an influencer having a code. I'm just going, I mean, you know,

you're Simone 15, you're probably going to get something. You're probably going to get something. Strong bet. Hayley 20. I got a discount code yesterday

but I don't think if it's for a product you'll use. What's your discount code for? Naughty things. Naughty things? Adult things. Are you influencing

naughty toys? What's the discount? It's not naughty influencing naughty toys? What's the discount? It's not naughty, is it? What's the discount? Hayley 20. 20% off? Yeah, 20. That's a good thing.

I'm not embarrassing my name with anything less than 20. Sometimes when I see it, Hayley 5, oh my God, Hayley, don't get out of bed for less than 20. And I know you're not taking a cut, but come on, put some value to your bloody name for Christ's sake. Don't put your name beside 5 or 10, only 20 or above. I want to Vaughan 80. You want to Vaughan 80?

I want 80% off. That's absurd. I want an 80% saving. Even if they jack the price, jack at 80%. Feels good though. Yeah, yeah, so that you still feel like you're getting the 80% discount. So Website Simply Codes have analysed millions of codes and websites on the www. And they have found the top.

I've got like a hundred of them here, the top popular ones. But I'll give you the top ten. Spring, various variations of that. Like spring and then add 25 or 10. Next, BF. BF. Oh, like best friend Like best friend, yeah, like best friend 20

Okay Or maybe the year, so different like variations of that Love is the 8th most popular coupon code Summer is the 7th Yeah Ship, 6 Ship, so that'd be like free shipping Yeah, so you could add free or you have free ship, free ship, 24 ship, 29 ship

Whatever, new Yeah Is number 5 You can add free or free ship, free ship, 24 ship, 29 ship, whatever. New is number five. Free is number four. And number three, welcome. So, you know, like sign up. Yeah, sign up. Welcome 15. Welcome 15.

Save is the second most popular coupon code online and different variations of that. And off is number one. So 10 off, 15 off. 20 off. Do you feel like it's like when you're logging into something you try so many times they block you out? Or could you just sit on your sports

wear website trying 90 different codes until you get 15% off? Yeah, just try it. But I want to know if somebody gets like, if someone runs a shopping website or a business website, do you get to see the codes that people are trying on? Maybe not. I just thought that could be quite fascinating to know that.

Somebody said an easy way to find a discount code is to go to that brand's Instagram and they'll have photos of influencers that they've used. Then you get that influencer's name and put that influencer and a number. And they usually keep like if you're a proper influencer, you keep it in your highlights reel.

What your codes are or what brands you work with. But I'm not really buying anything like bras and stuff from influencers. Are you sure they're so comfy? Right, yeah. They're so comfy, honestly. Download the Honey Chrome extension, Fletch. It searches the internet and tries all the discount codes for the website and applies the one that will save you the most.

Yes. Is that a New Zealand thing, though? Does that apply to a New Zealand website? I don't know. I don't know. If there's no capture thing, then no one's checking because bots will be hammering it. Gotta love the bots.

The bots will be hammering the discount code. I've never had to put in a capture, like select all the pedestrian crossings and then enter your coupon code. That's the, yeah. No, so that's what they're saying is that no one is checking it because if it's an open box, the bots will be hammering it with all of these options trying to find out the code.

Okay, well, I need a coupon discount code hammering bot. Yeah. Immediately. That's all you need to get the most out of your shopping experience. The Chrome extension. All right, well, you're welcome, New Zealand. What store would you like me to hammer for a discount code today? You're what you need to get is a discount code

to buy your discount code hammering website bot. Do they cost money? Robot 15. Robot 15. Hammerbot 15 money? Robot 15. Robot 15. Hammerbot 15. Hammerbot 20. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

I found a little article here and it's actually making me feel a little bit sad. Now, I knew that loneliness was a terrible thing that's sweeping our planet at the moment, but I didn't realise how bloody deadly it was. It's an epidemic they're calling it, loneliness. I know for old people it is, right?

They say it's unhealthy as well. Was it a pack of cigs a day? Chronic loneliness can be lethal, the equivalent impact of 15 ciggies a day on mortality rates. Isn't that crazy? Wow. I guess it's a whole mood thing and an energy thing. You have to feel lonely though because some people like being alone.

Is that fair to say? Yeah. Yeah, definitely. My pop did. My pop loved it. We got carers in, you know, like to help him with his medications and stuff, my pop, before he passed away.

And he hated it. He just wanted to be left, you know. Left alone. Yeah, old mates. Old mates. Old mates. Yeah, exactly. Played pool once a week with his old mate

and that was enough. And went to church on Sunday. That was it. That's a social life. That was a socialising. old mate and that was enough. And went to church on Sunday. That was it. That's a social life. That was a socialising. Wow. My granddad would have been the same. But this article is about why we find it so hard making new friends as adults.

It is hard to make adult friends. It's because I don't want any. It's because I've got too many. I don't have any time for them. I have to say I'm leading this chit chat but I do not relate. I make friends so easily. I make friends

with whoever is selling me a muffin, whoever is cleaning my car. Are you one of those people have said you're a bit much? Not the words I was going for here.

Friendly, warm, open. A bit much is how that is otherwise interpreted. Are you one of those people that go to a party and then people wake up the next morning

and you're their Facebook friend and you've organised to do something? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got everyone's number on my phone and I'm like, let's do coffee. I don't drink coffee, but I love making friends and I just cull. That's why I've been engaged for two years.

We can't invite everyone to the wedding. It's getting too big. Yeah. No control. Do you cull when you make a new one? Do you cull? No, but I guess you sort of just naturally things right all the way yeah because how many friends someone worked out how many

friends you can have right you're gonna have 150 people that you like know that's what the human there's a part of the human brain was it a malcolm gladwell book we're into that yeah we only have that much capacity. We've got that capacity for a village. Unless you're one of those like- 150. 150. Yeah. Unless you're one of those businessy, networky people that wants to know everyone.

But then they're costing themselves quality. Yeah. Because they want quantity. Yeah. But I know I've got it all and I'm exhausted. Anyway, I'll stop showing off about this because this article is about how hard it is to make friends and it's not my fault that I can't relate. It is.

So they're saying as we get older, there are two things that predominantly get in our way of making friends. Number one is we stop trusting people. We're jaded, basically. Oh, yeah. Like I've always said, never trust anyone. Ever. Ever.

Full stop. Ever. There's no second part to that sentence? No, just ever. Just never trust anyone Full stop Full stop Ever

Ever, full stop Ever, another ever Great Yeah Well, it's a challenge of trust I guess we've lived longer We've been hurt more We're not

Like, why would we at this age Open up ourselves to more sort of And it's like I've said Everybody that you meet Is just a remix of someone you already met Like Probably You don't need Two lots of that in your life to more sort of... And it's like I've said, everybody that you meet is just a remix of someone you already met. Probably. You don't need two lots of that in your life.

Well, that's the number one... Pick your favourite. The number one challenge, lack of trust. The second thing is, and it's a problem because friendships need time, is lack of time. And that's where I am a little bit. You're going like, I don't have enough time to invest in a new friendship. You've got to work and then, you know family yeah and other friends exactly that's what i find

is like i've already got i'm already struggling to give the friends i have the time they deserve to nurture the relationship so popular it's honestly been hard my whole life what i mean like this is why people say she's a bit much. So you need roughly 50 hours of shared contact time to move from acquaintances Hey mate, how are ya? to casual friends. How many shared hours?

50. To be a close friend? 200 hours. Oh wow. All up. Till I will say this is one of the closest friends. Do you,

if you're one of these people because I know people like this that have so many friends you just, you feel like you're one of these people, because I know people like this that have so many friends, you feel like you're in a second tier friendship group. No, no, no. I've got very close friends. I have our best friend, who the best friends is we're three.

And then I've got a real- But that's impossible. We've only known each other for a few years. Oh, Vaughan. Are we not best friends? Oh, babe. It's not you. Oh my God.

I was only kidding. I was only kidding. I don't like- Oh. Oh, Vaughan. This is primary school. You can't trust anybody. We haven't reached down to 100 hours yet. This we definitely have.

This still happens. That when you said primary school, this still happens. Like best friends. And I just said to my daughters, I was like, don't tell anyone they're your best friends. It will never end well. They'll weaponise it against you, they'll weaponise it against other people. Just say you've got friends. Did you tell them to never trust anybody?

I've also said, you remember what? The happiest, friendliest man in our lives always says. The man we look to as sort of an ambassador for how we want our relationships to be when we grow old. Never trust anyone ever. I know, best friend, it's hard.

But we were a unique case, me and my best friend Jess. Could we take some calls this morning about those times when you made an adult friend as an adult? As an adult? Like those heartwarming stories. How you did it, because that's the thing, when we're young, it's so easy because we get put in these circumstances. Sports and school and all our hobbies and family friends.

Now we go to work, we go home. So we've got our workmates and our family. And then you're not often, you know. But there could be people looking to make adult friends that have the time. Don't come knocking on my door. She's a full boy. I've got enough. My books are full. My books are full.

My books are full. But yes, I would love to know how you met and made your adult friend. Adult friend is sort of weird because it sounds a bit sexual. It's like asking someone out, isn't it? It is. Almost. Do you want to become friends? Yeah.

Do you want to be out of work friends? And then there could be like rejections. You've got that fear. You might get together outside of the place where you met, be it the gym or your workplace or whatever, and realise you actually have nothing in common. Yeah. Oh.

Yuck. That's a pit. That's horrible. And you're out of dinner going. Yeah, like, oh, how long do I have to sit here? Yeah. So we're talking about making adult friends. Yeah, apparently it's very hard as an adult to make friends

because we don't have time and we don't trust people anymore. So, I don't know, maybe you moved to a new city. Yeah. Don't bring up my sad story. I was telling these guys off here that when I moved to Auckland from Wellington and Aaron didn't move up with me until like eight months later, that I used to get a bit anxious and sad and I would just drive around Auckland for hours

because I felt like I had no friends. Even though you've literally just spent the last 20 minutes telling us that you've got too many. You've got too many. But geographically, were they all still in Wellington? Well, my sort of closest friends were all in Wellington. And I didn't want to sort of arrive in Auckland and then be like, hey, can we hang out?

I'm feeling really anxious. Oh, you're burdening a casual acquaintance. Where was your favourite place to park up and cry? I was living out in super south Auckland so I used to just drive around out south. You can drive forever. Ramarama. A lot of drives out to Ramarama. The botanicals used

to walk through the bush having a cry. Lovely place for a cry, the botanicals. Any city gardens, beautiful place. And you're watering the flowers at the same time. Yeah. Some messages in. Someone said, I do musical theatre. The best way to make adult friendships is to spend so much time together.

Almost too much time. Can you imagine how irritating it would be to be in a group of adult amateur musical theatre? I'm not on board with this rant. It's a room of Haley's. It's a room of Haley's. It's a room of Hayleys. One day more. More. And then everyone's like,

go again. These are my people. Improv, improv time. This is why I have so many friends. It'll be like, Laura, how did you make an adult friend? Hi, good morning, guys. Morning.

Morning. Sorry, just a bit rattling here. We moved to New Zealand from South Africa in 2019. Seemed up my husband out first to come check out everything here. And so I booked him an Airbnb with this amazing couple out in Rolleston. And this one late night here, this Viking of a man, my husband showed up at their door and they were petrified of this man with the deep boys with an accent and just standing there with awful beard.

They let him in the house luckily. Yep. And three weeks later, the children and I followed. And to find an Airbnb for a full family for two weeks is, you know, expensive. And so we ended up with them, stayed there for 10 days, Kiwi versus

South African. They're raising their children, we're raising our children, and yes, so eventually after that we left, they never left us. They came back to our new rental with no furniture. Offered us a TV, hallway, table,

bedding, playstation just to get us up and running. And they're nice. They brought food. They brought Kai to our house, sat on our carpet sharing pizza from Domino's and they never left us.

And since then, it has been just amazing learning each other's cultures, taking us to the beach. That is just a beautiful scene. Inviting them for a bride, doing birthdays, Christmases, sharing, you know, our local culture. And we've never left each other.

And every time we sit and talk about it, I nearly cry sometimes. And over the weekend, I just say to them, what if we never meet you? What if I never meet you? No. Don't think about it. You can't think like that.

You wouldn't be thinking about it. And I mean, meeting Imogene and Tim Kyle, man, they are rock hard Kiwis. They show us the Kiwi ways, the slang, the food, the festivities, the batch, the, you know, the days. It's just, they show us the Kiwi ways, the slang, the food, the festivities, the batch, you know, the days. It's just amazing. Laura.

You're making an adult friend. I'm sitting here on the sidewalk dropping my children off, and I'm just smiling of this amazing adult friend that I made at the age of 28. Wow. I'm so happy for you and your whanau. Very heartwarming. Laura, thank you so much for sharing. It was a sermon, wasn't it?

A sermon about a good Kiwi family. See, there you go. We won't make adult friends. No. I don't want to borrow that. I won't. Thanks, Laura. We'll get to more of your texts and calls next.

Talking about how you've made adult friends. We had a heart-wrenching story just before, didn't we? Beautiful. Moving. Some text messages in. If you just tried ringing me, I was brushing my teeth. I met my new adult friends at a cult I joined. A cult?

A cult. Yeah. Apparently this cult is called F45. And there's lots of clapping and like back pats. Wow. Compliments on your fat dumper. Was in the same kind of, you know. Yeah.

Yeah. I met my adult friend by swearing at my kids who were fighting over a drink bottle. We bonded because they had previously sworn at their children. Oh, nice. That's good to know you're on the same page on how to speak to your children in frustrating situations. Yeah, anonymous, how did you make an adult friend?

So I was having a bit of a sad day, actually, in my late 30s, which obviously doesn't really happen that often, but I went out and had some drinks alone. A little, you know, too much. Decided to walk home at night and ended up falling over. Bang, straight on both knees. Oh, the knees!

Yeah, the knees. And when I looked down and I saw the blood just pouring down my legs, I just lost it. And I literally fell backwards on the side of the road, just crying for my life. And it was pretty tragic. And this lovely, lovely couple came past and got a blanket and they had bandages and they sat with me for over an hour

talking to me and bandaging me up. And, yeah, we've been friends since. Oh, wow. They've been with me all the time. I'll say it. Guardian angels. Yeah, and so vulnerable. I know.

I could help someone if I saw someone, but I don't think I'd want to be friends with them afterwards. This is what I was just thinking, because they're in a position of power. They're not drunk or crying and bleeding on the street. I had to prove that I wasn't crazy, so I had to meet up with them a few days later. That would have been a lot of work.

We are normal. I'm quite normal. You're like, oh, look, I'll come, I'll catch up, I'll bring six bottles of wine. Anonymous sexy call. You're like, oh, look, I'll come, I'll catch up, I'll bring six bottles of wine and we'll sit down. Yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Anonymous six, you call Amber.

How did you make adult friends? Hello. So I was in the mall one day, you know, finding my own business, spending the money that I didn't have. Thought nothing of this, but I went to Starbucks because I quite enjoy Starbucks and I was like I need my tea I was looking at like the little the little takeaway cup thing thinking oh yeah this is cute my younger sister turned around and she was like hey they want to look at the cup so I moved out of the way thinking they wanted to look at the cups. The person was like, no, I really like your cardigan.

Taylor Swift is amazing and all this sort of stuff. And I'm like, oh, thanks. Like, oh, my God, someone's talking to me. I'm going to crawl into a pool and die. I am too much of a socially anxious person for this interaction right now. How did you follow up the Taylor Swift cardigan compliment? So I took, I blessed Twitter. I took it to Twitter because I felt so bad.

And I was like, Twitter, someone just complimented my Taylor Swift cardigan. And I did not catch their name. SOS, send help. And it turns out someone that I was following actually knew of the person I was talking to because they had put it on their Instagram that they had spotted me in the mall and was like, oh, my God, this girl's wearing the cardigan. I need to talk to her.

Yeah. It was the cardigan. Yeah. The magical cardigan from the music video. Like, just Taylor Swift. Let's say it's not the cardigan. It's Taylor Swift. If we break it down a step further,

it's Taylor Swift that brought this friendship together. Yeah, it is. Yeah, pretty much. Are you still friends with this person? Yeah. I'm gone out for breakfast, gone to Taylor Swift club nights, and got drunk and sung all too well

at the top of my lungs. You need to go back to Twitter and tag Taylor Swift in this story. Oh yeah, she'll love this. This is the kind of thing she'd do, one of those video calling some people and giving them a T-shirt. I feel.

Yeah. I think you should. Amber, thanks for your call. Some text messages. Good morning, sunshine. I'm a dairy farmer and it's hard to make friends. Unless they're cows, I guess. Yeah.

Right? You see them a couple of times a day. Friends are friends. And you're very hands-on with their boobs. So, you know, you and the cows are friends. Very personal. But I made a friend after rejecting them after a hookup gone wrong. Oh, okay.

So they, what was this sort of like, because when you're on Tinder in the country, you've got to spread that radius. Yeah. Just due to sparsity of population. So they, how did this hookup go wrong? I'm very interested to hear. So they became friends after they tried to hook up.

Yes. And then they were like, oh, no, no, no. Or there was some sort of cross-wired situation, but this hookup went wrong and now they're friends. That's good, though. That's a miracle. Yeah. Any sort of bad hookup.

I don't even want to see them again. No. Made adult friends via a mutual love of Singles Inferno on Netflix. I don't know. I don't know what Singles Inferno is, but that's like a TV show there. It's a TV program. Yeah.

Oh, it's like a too hot to handle. Gotcha. My name's Amanda. I met my friend through work. She always talked about walking around the local lake. One day I asked her if I could walk with her. And then she said, yeah, sure. And after that, we've been roller skating.

Okay. We've bought food together. we've been roller skating. Okay. We've bought food together. We've been chilling at her place. I'm 23. She's 40. We're chums. Blossoming friendship and adult friendship. It's lovely.

I do love that. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Zed Empty Tank. But right now, chance to win some free fuel. Erica, good morning. Good morning. All right. Okay.

How big's your fuel tank? Is she a ghost? That's a question you ask a lady. How big's your fuel tank? It's not too big, but it's definitely low. That's for sure. Okay. All right.

So we need some fuel. Erica. Everybody we talk to is driving around on bloody no petrol. Do you know the one that drives around the full tank? We're all too scared to go to the pump. Yeah, exactly. I do 20 bucks a time. Okay, well, Erica, you can say stop at any stage,

and that fuel is locked in, and you win it. Otherwise, if you get cut off and the fuel pump buzzes, you lose. It could cut out at 80. It could cut out at 300. It could cut out at 300. We had a greedy guts last hour, didn't we? We did have a bloody greedy guts. Greedy guts with 150 bucks, was it? That was where he was going to tap out, eh?

Yeah. All right, well. Greedy boy. Say stop at any stage. Let's go. $15. $35. $15. $35.

$130. Stop. Oh, my gosh. Oh, I couldn't take it. $130 is where it buzzed this morning. It did, yeah. Erica, let's see how high it would have gone. You've got that $130 locked in. $165.

$190. Oh, wow. $205. $235. Erica, you should have been a greedy guts. You should have been greedy. I didn't want to. I was listening earlier and I was like, I am too scared to do that.

I know, and then we greedy shamed you. We shouldn't have done that. I know, I know. Well, congratulations, $130, Erica. Cool. Thank you so much. Another chance for you to win some free fuel tomorrow. What are you doing?

Are you shoveling? She's shoveling. She's shoveling the shovel. I am watching the 2IC shovel. I told you it was shoveling. I knew it. What's a 2IC shovel? The second in charge.

She's the big boss. No, he's clearing crap from the underpass. We're farmers. Yeah, Eric is the big dog. Yeah. And the 2IC is her hairy. You know, the person that she

bosses around and tells her to do things and then she shoots off, she's got to shoot off and do something. She shoots off on the motorbike and just goes and has a snitch.

Japers. You've got Vaughn all revved up. Shuffling. Shuffling. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley.

Well, the lovely Karween at the social media desk brought up this morning that she's off to a wedding soon and Karween there's a bit of a

conundrum you're faced with Are you getting married? No Are we invited? I'm not getting married If you got married would we be invited? You don't have to answer that

I'm just Are you going to bring good gifts? I'm forcing an answer Pretty good Pretty good But that's not the conundrum is who to invite or what gift to bring. But what dish to bring as it's a potluck wedding.

Yeah, yeah. So I think it's quite a small wedding. I'm just a low-key one. But yeah, it's potluck. But what do I take? I've never ever heard of a potluck wedding, but I'm on board. I've been to a couple. You've been to a couple?

Yeah. Because I went to drama school, and so a lot of my friends are theatre actors. We're not made of money. Poor. Is that it? Poor. Yeah.

Basically. I actually think I would prefer a potluck wedding. Yeah, it's also a cultural thing as well, which is like sharing food, bringing food. That's your gift. Yeah. I loved it. I loved it so, so much.

And the best thing about the potluck wedding, and this is the note for you, Cowan, bring your A game. And everyone did. So it's not like if you go to a potluck or go to a potluck at Vaughan's and you bring a tiger cob loaf. Why wouldn't you bring your A game

if you're having a potluck of mine? I'd bring a pack of, you know, Bring your A game. I'm putting on my A game. I had the last potluck I had at yours. I just brought some from the supermarket. You bought Mama Fialoni's garlic bread, the shittest garlic bread.

No! And it was noted. It went off. That garlic bread. It went off because it was garlic bread, but he can afford the good garlic bread. I can't afford the good garlic bread. You're cheaped on the garlic bread.

You could have got that. I had a whole log to myself. It was good. That was good garlic bread. You could have had the notice. It's not garlic bread myself. It was good. That was good garlic bread. It was bloody good. It's not garlic bread shame him. Just because you made fancy smoked meats.

Turn up with your bloody tinfoil roll of garlic bread. Two to a pack. The last potluck I went to was their most incredible thing. They set up two trestle tables and you just brought, it was like you brought a dish

and she sent out a form basically to say, in categories. So it was like, if you're attending, it was like meats, breads, sides, salads, desserts. And you would tick and say, I'm going to do a meat. I might bring like a lamb on the bone.

I might bring a thingy. Because I get a bit anxious when people have a potluck and they don't organise who's bringing what. Because what if you end up with too many salads? Yeah, especially for a wedding. But that was the thing. It's not a salad. No one got a big mixed bag of creamy coleslaw. They went all out. They, especially for a wedding. But that was the thing. It's not a salad. No one got a big mixed bag

of creamy coleslaw. They went all out. They were your Nadia lids. Well, that's because Spencer wasn't invited. If he'd been invited, we wouldn't have even got the super slaw.

You would have got the cheapest slaw that comes in a bag. There would have been a pack and save barcode on the lid. He had to take the lid off because I got it from the deli.

Oh, and this is what you should do because this is, this last wedding I went to, this went off. So everyone brought their A game. I'm talking ceviche, legs of lamb, tacos. It was amazing. Oh, wow.

So there was no theme to the food. Curries? This is what went off, is her uncle went to the local Indian restaurant and got one bain marie of rice and one bain marie of butter chicken. What's a bain marie? Speak English. Speak poor people, not Queen Margaret. Like the big traysmarie of butter chicken. What's a bain-marie? Speak English. Speak poor people, not Queen Margaret.

Like the big trays that had a flame underneath. What? Like a buffet. He bought the trays. No, the Indian restaurant gave him the trays.

He had to take the trays back though. Yeah, he could take the trays back next day. Okay, because if you go to John Chan Takeaways, he'll just

chuck in a tinfoil bad boy and you're good to go. You don't have to have to pay that back. It was so easy. Basically because he didn't have a kitchen

or time to do it. Yeah. And it was probably a cheaper option. It was so good. Basically because he didn't have a kitchen or time to do it. Yeah. And it was probably a cheaper option. It was so good. Cowan at the social mini-desk, what do you think you'll take to the potluck wedding? Oh, you're a vegetarian! I am. The worst? Well, I don't know. Do they know that when they invite you? Big slabs of tofu.

Probably not. Well, usually when I do potlucks with friends and stuff, I'm usually on dessert and make a mean brownie or something. Take a pud, take a brownie. Is that alright for a wedding? Okay, here's my question about a potluck wedding. How many people go?

How many people have been to previous potluck weddings? I think the wedding I went to would have been under 100. But how are you going to make enough for everybody to get some? Everything. But there's so much. If you think you're at a wedding of 80 people, say, there's 80 dishes, 80 of the best dishes. I'm for this. So no, you might not get one of Carwin's brownies,

but you might get some of Cathy's. But I want some of Carwin's brownies. I want a little bit of everything. And then, because remember what happened at Vaughan's wedding, the dessert didn't come out until like 10 o'clock at night because they were late. They were late on the puts. And you wouldn't be late with the potluck because they'd all be here.

It's there when you arrive. But my biggest issue is I'm not going to get enough of, I'm not going to get to try everything. But there's going to be so much out. So you might not get some of Carwin's brownies, but someone else is going to do a tiramisu that's going to blow your socks off, mate. But also, is it like bragging rights when your dish that you bought, the empty is the first?

Absolutely. I went back and I made, I think, like a Mexican-based salad. And it was pretty full. The bowl was pretty full. It's a good salad. Oh, yeah, you took a done salad. I had a little look and I was like. I wouldn't take a salad primarily for the fact that people will dodge a salad

in favour of. It was more of like a bean, corn sort of dip for chips. What are you doing with beans? Oh, no. Oh, wait. You can't dip your chips in a salad. Well, it wasn't a salad. It was more of like a Mexican dip.

Well, make up your mind here. You're very fiery on what you took now. I know, but if I could do it again... So you've never experienced that feeling of a potluck dinner when your dish is gone, unlike that time I took authentic French garlic bread. Not on a grand's. That bread, though. And then I took a whole loaf home as Not on a grand's. That bread though.

And then I took a whole loaf home as well. We ate it the next day. Yeah. Cold from the fridge. So then I took some out, like the leftovers to the pigs. And they said, who bought this? And I said, Fletch. And they said, I thought he was doing all right for himself financially.

I said, the reason he's doing all right for himself financially is, well, it cost him $2 to bring 10 loaves of this shit second-rate garlic bread. I got a special. It's reduced to clear. He's like, oh, I don't know if this is good garlic bread. Oh, you know this was cheap. The cheapest garlic bread. You son of a bitch.

All right. Next on the show. How to ask for a pay rise. So you can take good garlic bread to your friend's pot like dinner. We're joined in studio by someone, last time we probably unfairly labelled bad news, Brad. Let's see if we can turn it around. Senior economist, even though he's just a young man,

probably sick of hearing that too. Brad Olsen, hello. Thank you so much for having me. It is, how old are you? I'm 25. 25. Wow. And you're the go-to guy for economy chat on the news. It seems to be that way.

Look, I think people want to sort of be able to understand what's going on and economists are sort of like lawyers. We often talk in big words so that people can't understand. That's not really useful for anyone. Right. Young and approachable. Yeah, not dumb it down. I think that's important. I'm not trying to make things oversimple. It's just, look, if people at home can understand what's

going on, they can make better decisions. We're in the mood to dumb it down. I'd welcome that. Okay. Well, the big question is, this year, are we ****? And if we are ****, how **** are we? I mean, this has sort of been going on for a while, so, like, various degrees of it, if you will.

Right. I think, in all honesty, this year is going to be a different sort of challenge. Like the first two years of COVID were very much the health element. And that's true this year as well. But, you know, during lockdown, during level four and all that, we had a lot of the economy that could still operate. You know, people could either work from home or, you know, there are essential services. Yes, a lot of people couldn't work, but a lot of people could. This year, so many people are going to get sick and just have to stay at home for up to a month perhaps

that stuff just is going to grind to a halt a bit more. So I think the difficulty is going to be that we don't have an official lockdown, but no one is willing to go out. Everyone's too scared or they're too sick. Right. So that's yes, we're... Yes, we're...

Yes, okay. Good, good, good, good. Good, good, good. Good, good, good. Well, thanks for coming on. Hey, yeah, with the good news. Have I changed the way from bad news, Brad, good. Well, thanks for coming on. Yeah, with the good news. Have I changed the way from bad news, Brad, yet? Nope.

So in terms of the big resignation and people working, they might be, I don't know, looking for a pay rise. You've got inflation going up. And so technically a lot of people are losing money. Absolutely. Well, I mean, like wages have gone up 2.4% in the last year. Inflation has gone up 4.9%. It doesn't take a mathematical genius or an economist to tell you that those two numbers

don't match up. So people at home are paying more for their rentals, they're paying more for electricity, for fuel, for food. They're not getting as much money in the pay packet. And I think that's the big concern, right? If you haven't got a raise of 4.9% in the last year, the amount of money you've got to pay for the same stuff

has effectively gone down. And I think that that's a big one. That's really concerning for a number of households because stuff is expensive. I mean, tomatoes are like $7 a kg. Rentals are insane. Fuel is what, nearly $2.50? It's far, far too high.

And I think what you're seeing there is that people are going, well, hang on, I need to be able to live. I'm not going to sort of just sit here on poverty wages for the rest of my life. I want a good go of this. And how do they go about that? My ciggies aren't getting any cheaper, are they? I'll tell you, they are. I'm doing $35 a day.

You don't smoke either of you. I'm having a roll. My roll is real thin now. I've started growing my own. Drying it out. It's a long process. I'm gagging for a ciggie by the time it's dry enough. See, I feel like the more appropriate one for New Zealanders is like homebrew. Because, you know, you think about like beer and that. And I mean, that's expensive.

It's certainly not cheap for a lot of people. But, you know, there are options, I think, for a lot of New Zealanders. But the plain facts of the matter are that you don't have enough money to live for a lot of people. And I think this year as well, it's also like after two years of a pandemic, people are sitting there and going like, I am exhausted. I want to get paid fairly. I also want to feel like my company actually respects me and looks after me. So I think this time around, you're seeing people who are going, everyone's talking about the labour market being real tight. There are job opportunities in a lot of places. Maybe if my business is not making it worth my while to stick around here, if there's a toxic culture, if they're not paying me enough, if it doesn't feel like a good place, actually,

I've got other options as a worker, and people are starting to think about that a lot more now. It's very empowering, isn't it? Well, it is. I mean, scary, but empowering. It is a big change, though, and I think particularly for younger people, you know, we know during the global financial crisis, for example, that young people lost their jobs much more. We know that this time around the same thing happened. Youth unemployment was considerably higher. We saw the likes of women and minorities also, you know, got out of jobs a

lot faster. So I think this time around, now that the dial has flipped and you're seeing a much greater focus, you know, from the workers, workers hold a lot more power now, that sort of dynamic is meaning that people are going, well, hang on, I've got to work quite hard as an employer to keep my staff. Previously, the focus was really on, I need to grow my business, I need more workers. Now it's, I need to grow my business, I need to go and find new talent. But also people are going, I actually need to keep my current workers because they might run off because the competitor might be paying more

or they might be looking for a new opportunity. So that's a big shift. We haven't seen that one nearly as much. So it's not just the sort of job opportunities, but it is this resignation element of people going, actually, I might leave my current job because there is something better out there. Smells like the stank of communism to me, Brad,

as a white male doing all right for himself. I won't have it! Sounds like the market working pretty well, to be honest, a fair bit of competition. Yeah, healthy competition. So you've got to be working out your pay, four and a half at least percent. That's what you're wanting to look for at the moment.

I mean, we're going to get new figures quite soon that are going to show it going even higher. But I think the difficulty at the moment, right, is that a lot of workers are sitting there. We know that half of the New Zealand workforce last year didn't get a pay rise at all. And so, you know, in real terms, they've gone backwards. You know, they're having to figure out,

they're paying more for fuel and more for rent and more for power, more for food. They're having to figure out what do they cut. And I think that's the stark reality for some people is they're going, well, actually, I've only got so much cash. I've got my costs going up. My incomings aren't going on that much higher. What don't I pay for?

Ciggies and Avos. I can't give up my ciggies. I'll have smashed ciggies on toast. Two birds, one stone. You trying to make inflation go higher? That'll get you moving in the morning. The kids will never buy houses with all these smashed ciggies

on toast they keep eating at their flash cafes. So let's say someone goes to their boss and says, I need a pay rise and the boss is like, look, she's tough times, COVID, blah, blah, blah. What's like a simple line or like a good thing to say to nix that?

Look, I think honestly the first bit there is probably not to go in with such a hard sell immediately. It's a softer, softer approach is going to do you and the boss better. Making it clear, you know, I've been working some hard hours. It's been tough, softer approach is going to do you and the boss better. Making it clear, you know, I've been working some hard hours. It's been tough during COVID. I've been a loyal worker.

There are other people that are looking at me. You know, there's other opportunities out there. I'm keen to stay around, but I need this to be worth my while. Can we have a conversation

about, you know, how much I'm worth here? That was so eloquent. Because I would have said no to Vaughan just because he came in so hot, but you, I'm like, absolutely.

I was about to open up my wallet. I've got a tenner. I've got a tenner. I've got a tenner. I've got some ciggies. I've got some ciggies and a tenner. Look, I need the avocado first, though. Yeah.

You better resell the ciggies for more. That's not the economist thinking, is it? No. What's the situation if they just say, it's not possible? We can't do it. Well, I think in all seriousness, you can start casting around for those other opportunities.

You know, there are jobs. We know that Trade Me job ads are up, I think, 25% from the last year. So there are opportunities going. And also, you know, if you're currently in a role, you've obviously got some skills. You got employed in the first place. You've got something behind you. Not saying that you sort of just immediately quit, but you do sort of just start to go, okay, well, hang on.

If there isn't this sort of value here, maybe I need to start looking a little bit further afield. Are there other opportunities? And I think, you know, with COVID, you sort of go, is the risk as bad to change? Because previously you went, well, if I change jobs, I don't have that same job security and similar. I feel like at the moment, people are going, well, actually, there's something more to life than just the nine to five work. I need to find something that sort of fulfills me and, you know, gives me the money so that I can do the things I want to do. You know, go out on the boat on the weekend, go fishing, you know, go out with friends, whatever it might be.

Don't buy a boat in this economy, though. No, very expensive. Maybe if you don't already have one. Find a friend with a boat. Yes. 100%. And then just offer them some pittance for fuel. One avocado per ride.

One avocado or two ciggies. Brad, I don't know. I feel like I'm not ready to yet get rid of the moniker of bad news, Brad, because there was a bit of bad news in there. But there's lots of opportunities for young people, though, in don't know. I feel like I'm not ready to yet get rid of the moniker of bad news, Brad, because there was a bit of bad news in there. There's lots of opportunities for young people, though, in the jobs market. I think that's a bit of positive news. Optimistic Brad over here. Optimistic Brad, thanks so much for coming in.

Thank you very much for having me. Fact of the day, about Bruce Springsteen. Oh, I love him. The boss. I know you're a big fan of Springsteen. I think you even mentioned the song the other day because the Bruce Springsteen song is, I would say Bruce Springsteen's most well-known song.

Is that on or not? Born in the USA? Yep, you bet. Yeah. He's really good friends with the Obamas, eh? They do a podcast! Yeah, they do a podcast. How cool is that? Barack Obama and Bruce Springsteen do a podcast. I didn't know this about this song, but it's about the economic hardships of Vietnam

War veterans returning home. Oh, yeah. And how hard it was, even though they were born in the USA. How it shouldn't be this hard to go away and fight for your country and come back and then struggle in the country that you were born in and also fought for. Yeah, right. But today's fact of the day about this song is that this song did better in New Zealand than it did in the USA. Really? Yep. Wow. This song got to number

one in the charts in New Zealand in its time of release. 1984 it got to number one in New Zealand. It also got to number one in Ireland. Number two in Australia. The European Hot 100 Singles Chart saw this at number five.

In the Netherlands, it got to number five. Right. In the UK, it got to number five. But in the US, on the US Billboard Top 100, it only ever got to number nine. What? Yeah, it got to number nine. End of year song charts in 1985.

In Australia, it was the 16th biggest song of 1985 In New Zealand it was the 22nd biggest song of 1985 And in the US it was the 92nd biggest song of 1985 That is absurd Especially because it's such an anthem and such a recognisable song So insanely iconic right? Don't they have ears? How can you not love this song?

It's about you. It's about your country. But maybe they knew that it was about how hard it is to have PTSD after returning from serving your country in Vietnam, that they didn't want to sort of own that. Right, you're saying because it kind of sounds like a patriotic song, but it's a little bit negative about the country as well because I was born here in the USA.

But it's not negative about the country, negative about the people running it, perhaps. Wow. But yeah, so today's fact of the day is this song from Bruce Springsteen, born in the USA, didn't actually do that great in the USA. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. line yesterday, half of us, I reckon Within a month or so? Yeah. We're going to get it? It's coming. A couple of months. It's coming. Yeah, a couple of months February, March, April. We've

booked our booster in. We've booked our booster We're two weeks away from our booster So if we could just calm down until two weeks? Yeah I was just going to wimp off my way through this one, guys It's going to move to infrared sauna and wimp off my way through the pandemic Yeah, good luck with that this one, guys. It's going to move to Ravenout.

Infrared sauna and Wim Hof my way through the pandemic. Yeah, good luck with that. We're going to get boosted. Time for a chest freezer. Fill it with water. Let's do it. It's so cold. Oh no, it's a panic attack waiting to happen.

So with the announcement that Jacinda made on Sunday that it was on its way, it's a panic attack waiting to happen. So with the announcement that Jacinda made on Sunday that it was on its way, of course the panic buying began instantly. Well, yes, supermarkets stripped, weren't they, instantly. Can't get panty anywhere. Pantadol, off the shelves. I went yesterday and they had the one-person limit.

One pack per person. I noticed even some supermarkets on Saturday had, even before that announcement, had a limit on panties. These news stories kind of started a week or two ago about getting prepared. Yes, so about getting prepared to have

Omicron. Not to keep trying to avoid it, but how to prepare to have it. So when you get it and you're stuck at home and you can't go out. You need a little kit. You need a little kit. And I made my kit yesterday based on a couple of the articles I'd read. We got the new masks.

I can't remember what the code is. P2. P2. So either P2 or N95 or K95. There you go. We got some of those. Hard to get though. So hard.

But we went to a pharmacy and we got like six packs of them. Of course, your sanitiser. Don't go crazy, you don't need that much. You only need a squirt every time you touch something. A at-home thermometer. I don't have one of those. You can get them from a pharmacy.

Do I need one though? It will tell you if you've still got the virus going through. You'll be all hot and fever-y. I'll just know I'm hot and fever-y. And if it goes too high, you might want to go to the hospital. Yeah, because if it gets over 40, you're going to need a warm half ice bath. Yeah. Okay. Bring that temp down, baby.

And your cold and flu basics like your lozenges. Colds don't come for me because I go to it. Okay. Half. I'm so excited to see how this works out for you, Vaughn. I'm going to die. You are. You're going to need your lozenges and your cough mixtures.

Yep. You know, your Robitussins. I went Robitussin. Up to you what brand you go with. I like Vicks. What's the one that they cook in the chicken and on TikTok? Yeah, Vicks Formula 44. That's a NyQuil.

That's American. Sleepy chicken. Sleepy chicken. Don't do that. Electrolytes is one thing that's quite hard to find at the moment. We didn't get any. But to keep your hydration. You can get the, like, they look like broccol tubes.

Electrolyte tabs. Yes. Oh, okay. Because I've been sick before with, like, food poisoning, and you put a couple in a glass and they bubble up. Excuse my ignorance, is this like Gatorades? I mean, yeah. Yeah.

Something from Powerades. Gatorades would have more sugar. Lots of shugs. Whereas these just have- What are electrolytes? Salt. What are they? They're electrolytes.

What do they fall under? What umbrella of things do they fall under? I don't know. You're asking a hard question. You're asking a hard question. What are electrolytes? You have a look at that. So that's something else that should be in your kit.

In your kit. In your kit, you want to have some tissues that you're not using up your toilet papers that you don't have to stockpile toilet paper like a... Yeah. Medication for two weeks. This is something. So if you're on a constant medication, making sure you've got enough of it.

Yeah. For two weeks. Ice blocks. We've got some popsicles. What flavour? Lemonade. Okay. Because when you're sick, you need a little lemonade popsicle.

Yeah. And enough food for one week. You don't need any more than that. You don't need to be stocking up too much. One to two weeks worth of food. And also they say a buddy as well. And a buddy system. If you do need more food or anything, they can just drop it at your doorstep. So we went out with our friends

the other day and we made a little plan. Whoever gets it first, we'll cook for them. We'll do grocery deliveries. Unless you work, you all go down. Or starve to death. I Unless you work, you all go down. Or starve to death. I've been stockpiling guns. Okay. Right.

And a wheelie bin. Okay. Labelled guns. Not on the government's. Now beside that, there's a wheelie bin that says bullets. Right. That's the government's recommended kit list. Yeah, but see, I can just go shopping with my gun at the neighbour's house. This is a man that wants to apply for a gun licence so he's talking like this.

Give me some panties. I need a pack of panties and some batteries. If you're in control of who gets a gun licence in this country and you're listening, do not give one to Vaughan Smith from the wider Auckland region. Because he's building a fortress. He is. But yeah, get out there. There's still plenty of stuff. So just

buy what you need to make a little kit. I also encourage panic buying because I see on the news, they're like, well, people are panic buying, and they say it in that tone, and then that just encourages more panic. The other thing, one thing is like wipes, Dettol wipes or something like that, like antiseptic wipes so that you can keep your house nice and clean. Your bloody mate Madeline Sami told us all to flush those, didn't she? Well, she was wrong.

Ruined New Zealand's sewerage system. I will never forgive her. They're off the shelf, I know. You bring it up. I was just starting to forget, didn't she? Well, she was wrong. Ruined New Zealand's sewerage system. I will never forgive her. They're off the shelf. I know. You bring it up. I was just starting to forget. And then she sung that song about bring something new, New Zealand. Give something new a go.

But we can't because we're all done. How many strikes does this Madeline Sami want? Leave her alone. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. So yesterday, for the, I believe, the first time in my life, I saw a grown man with longer hair brushing his hair. I have never seen, because I grew up, my father,

I grew up, all the men in my life either had no hair or short back and sides. My papa probably had the longest hair of everybody, and he was a brush. He kept a brush in his pocket. If he ever went out and he was, he'd give it a brush. Right, okay. He was, but a comb. Sorry, a comb. A plastic comb. Yes, a comb.

So I've seen like a short to medium length comb happening. Yep. I have never seen a man with longish hair. I'm talking like, what's this? What do you call this? Shoulder length. Long bob. Long bob? Not quite touching the shoulders,

but in that vicinity. Yeah. I saw a man brushing his hair and... We're being a pest at the gym again. You're such a gym pest. Who was it? You're such a gym pest.

I was walking in. You're standing there naked in the changing room washing a man, brushing his hair. What are you doing? You know what I remember here? Jesus.

Give us a sniff. No, I was just walking in and there's this area outside where you get changed where there's a blow dryer and a big mirror. And he was standing in there and he was brushing his hair, but it was quite like feminine. But then I thought, A, I've never seen a man with long hair brush his hair. Yeah. B, there is no particularly masculine or feminine way to brush one's hair.

Yeah. Mostly because men I've seen with a comb do like short movements. I've never seen a man with long hair brush it. There's only one way to brush, really. This was a brush with a handle. Yeah. Like a paddle brush. Yeah. Not like one of those scruff comb things that- brush, really. This was a brush with a handle. Yeah. Like a paddle brush. Yeah.

Not like one of those scruff comb things that you can hold in one hand. Yeah, a paddle brush. Yeah, like a paddle brush. And he brushed. Why were you so amazed by this? Because it occurred to me as I watched it, I was like, why does that not quite look right? And it's because I've never seen it before.

I've never seen a grown man with long hair. But you'd watch your wife do her hair. She's not a man. I've checked. I checked. Last night. Yeah, right. I checked this morning.

You've checked quite a bit. Quick pat. Good for you. Good for you. Good for you. Well, Aaron's got very, very long hair. This is your fiance. Aaron's probably the guy I personally know would be the longest yes

but his it's maybe a different story because aaron has tight ringlets so very very curly here so aaron can only brush his hair when it's wet if he brushes it when it's dry it goes full yeah frizz afro so this guy was post gym shower yeah so weird yeah. So you've got to get the tangle out. Aaron brushes daily. He just got a new paddle brush, actually. I saw it in the supermarket shopping. What kind of paddle brush does Aaron have? So usually he went for like a slender one with very wide bristles.

You don't want a tight bristle on a tight curl. Right. Because again, it'll frizz. Yeah. It's more of a comb brush. But he just got a new paddle brush brush as described by you just now. That's what it was. It was a paddle brush.

Right. It wasn't one of those ones. My mum had a brush set growing up and I would sit in front of her mirror and brush my pretty head. Am I a pretty boy, mother? Mother? Oh my God.

No, but she had one that was like hundreds of thousands of... Yes, no, no, no, no. Ponytail hairs or something. Like a boar bristle. Yes, yes, yes, yes. It wasn't... It was like little plastic dudes. That'll make...

If you're a woman with like straight hair, that'll make your hair very shiny. So shiny. She had shiny hair. Just brush and brush and brush. Is this just hair porn to you because you don't have any? No, it was... It wasn't erotic. Is this just hair porn to you because you don't have any? No, it wasn't erotic.

It was just, it really piqued my interest because I'd never seen it before. It's a real self-care thing, isn't it? Aaron goes very slowly through this. I'd imagine it would be therapeutic in a way. Yeah. To brush one's long hair. So how long did you stand there and watch this poor man?

No, it was like I was walking. I saw him from maybe 15 metres away and I did a slow walk and watched it. Oh, so you used pest level. But he didn't see me because he was looking in the mirror and I was coming in from a tight angle. It wasn't pest. It was like literally a thin hallway.

Right. And then I went into the bathroom, slid the door shut, slid it back, opened half an inch and put my eye up to it and watched him brush the rest of his pretty hair I said Through the gap in the door I said Who's the pretty boy?

Who's the pretty boy with the pretty hair? Your swipe card isn't going to work at the gym when you get there after work You're banned