ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 27th January 2023

Episode Date: January 26, 2023

Top 6: Elton John Transport  Final Rankings: Fingers  Jazz Thornton!  Vaughan spat at fans  Hayleys Version!  Jason Momoa Spotted  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Try their refreshing McCafe iced coffee available now at Macca's. If I sound somewhat distracted... You are. Sorry.

If I sound somewhat distracted Yes It's because I'm looking for a wedding dress Not a wedding A wedding outfit To go to a wedding For the wedding tomorrow For the wedding tomorrow

Because You can't I can't You can't wear the same thing I've been to heaps of weddings this summer Have you done three? Yeah I've done three This is number four

So many I know. So I need something to wear and it's going to be 29 degrees down in Christchurch. I think you can wear the same thing. Excuse me, I'm tearing up here. Are you?

Oh my God, you're such a feminist. You're right, I can wear it. No, I just said it to blow my nose. No, you can wear the same thing. No, I also don't want to. It's a nice excuse to buy a new dress and it's going to be 29 degrees

so I've got to think natural fabrics, I think natural fibres. Absolutely. Breathable, flowing. Your linens or your silks. That's kind of what i'm limited to or maybe 100 cottons but it'd have to be a formal shape if you're wearing cotton because it's too casual cotton on have you thought of cotton on to i just slightly i respect um your input into this process a little too casual well you said cotton yeah yeah yeah a shocking amount of cotton on clothes aren't cotton you know i was

in a department store in the United States of America? Like, I think it was Bloomingdale's or one of those, like, Macy's or whatever. No, it was, like, a nice department store. And they had a thing. It was a lot. So it was in Costco. It was low. No, you know how they had the different, like, they have a Tommy Hilfiger and they have,

like, a Polo Ralph Lauren. And then they had a cotton on. And I was like. Cotton on? Is it Australian? And they also had a polo Ralph Lorraine and then they had a cotton on and I was like cotton on and they also had a rod and gun which a rod and gun but then the cotton on I was like do Americans know that this is like

cotton on yeah cotton on's Australian eh Australia and New Zealand also rod and gun are you guys rod and gun men yet not yet Vaughn is. It's just the price that stops me being a Rod and Gun guy. But it's also,

it's the next tier of life, I feel. Like, you guys are both too youthful. You know, they always do those cross-section things and then one axis will be named, like,

age, and the other one will be, like, maturity. Yeah. Those are quite similar. It might be, like,

classiness yeah i feel like rod and gun is up on age but it's also up on like classiness yeah whereas you can like go to barkers like yeah you've been recently and middle classiness a bit less middle age yeah i'd just rather wear sweatpants from cotton on to be honest yeah yeah that's young and trashy yeah i'm gonna go to the mall but i I'm going to go to the fancy mall. So it's a mixture of cheap and fancy. Okay. And you're going to this wedding solo?

I am going to this wedding. Aaron got ditched. So you'll be DTF. Why did he ditch you? I'm DTF. Aaron ditched me because, and I told the truth to the bride and groom. Yeah. Our cat is not happy at the moment.

Rolly is somewhat anxious and depressed. Because of the house renovations. Because we're removing the house at the moment, the back end of the house, doing demolition. He keeps showing up and he's like, where it at? And he's so confused and he's been a little uneasy and depressed. I don't ask my cats how they're feeling because I don't give a fuck. No, he is my life.

They get fed twice a day. They meow incessantly. Because they meow incessantly because they're upset about something. And we try to listen to him and figure out what is at the bottom of it. And I can feel in his spirit and his soul that he's upset. And we don't feel happy leaving him behind. So the bride and groom get a call from you. They're like, oh, Hayley's calling.

You're like, hi, look, my fiance's not coming. I know you've probably paid for the catering. I know. But our cat's anxious. To be fair, I'm more the guest. He knows them both very well. And one of them he knows very well indeed. It's part of the theatre industry.

But I'm more the guest. And Aaron, you know, I don't think Aaron would have maybe had a standalone invitation anyway. I don't want to use this excuse to get out of shit. I don't want to go to. Oh, I've just been talking to the bloody golden retriever. He's beside himself. I'm not going to go stay and give him a pat. He's having a mental health day. Yeah. I did think about

finding an excuse, but I was like, they don't even care that he's not coming. You know what I mean? They're very casual, cool people. So I was like, I'm just going to tell the truth. My pig's recently been diagnosed with gonorrhea. Well, not gonorrhea. I was thinking more of a depression. He's a depressed pig. I can't go. Seasonal anxiety. I've got something to go to tomorrow. I'm going to use this to get out of it. I don thinking more of a depression. He's a depressed pig. I can't go. Seasonal anxiety.

I've got something to go to tomorrow. I'm going to use this to get out of it. I don't want to go. It's on birthday lunch. I don't think it's a good excuse. I don't want to go to some birthday lunch. I'll get sad. That's the person that nobody wants to talk to. Because I will be farting around parking the car or whatever. Shut it. I'll run in. Bags up seats. And they'll all be there

because we'll be late. My own fault. I'm always late. And the only certainty is going to be the guy I'm going to have to tweet out. My pig has bipolar. And they'll all be there because we'll be late. My own fault. I'm always late. And the only certain is going to be the guy I'm going to have to tweet out. My pig has bipolar and I can't go anywhere. Why not? Use it.

Yeah. My goat, a nervous wreck with anxiety. I just don't feel comfortable leaving it home by myself. My cow,

some past trauma. Yeah. Don't even get you started about your schizophrenic chickens. Oh my God, they're talking to themselves.

They keep looking over their shoulder and be like, pardon? Yeah. Can you seriously get more chickens? Because eggs are fucked at the moment. Oh my God, please. But if you said that even the price of chickens has gone crazy, I might go and look some. You can get a hot one for like $14.

My neighbor's got something I could steal you one. I have an ugly one. I don't need a hot one. I want a hot chicken. With honey soy all coated on it. No, no. I saw some hot chickens Over the holiday

Like designer chickens Showed chickens Designer Like grey fluffy You know They're not always egg Are they an egg laying breed I don't care

They were hot They're more like your bantams And stuff You don't want those Bantam eggs are smaller With bantam Bantam Bantam chickens

That's what they're called Yeah Bantam hens So to wrap it up. Yes. Hayley's DTF. I'm DTF for the wedding this weekend. Her cat's got anxiety.

Yep. I don't want to go out for lunch. And you need all the more chickens. My animals are riddled with mental health problems. And you want a hot honey soy chicken. Yes. This has been a productive week, if that's how we're going to use it. This is pretty good.

Fantastic. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Thank you, Sam. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Some, well, some close news here with the asteroid. Well, we've got the power to stop them now, don't we? Don't we just shoot it with a laser?

Oh, no, I think this one's too fast and too close and too small, isn't it? Too fast and too furious. So the rock will scam 2,500 miles above the Earth's surface. And as Sam just mentioned, that's closer than orbiting satellites. I don't like that. I don't like that. Who's going to see it? And the size of a double-decker bus.

That's large. It's quite large, isn see it? And the size of a double-decker bus. That's large. It's quite large, isn't it? Well, if it knocked you. Are we going to see it? I don't know. Here in God's zone. Here in God's zone? I'll tell you what.

Oh, I thought you were saying here in God's zone. The God's zone. Are we living in the God's zone? We're living in the God's zone. You have entered the God's zone. Welcome. Are we living in the God Zone? We're living in the God Zone. You have entered the God Zone. Welcome. Are we going to see it? Right, I think even if it was,

apparently it would be nothing to worry about. But it's just got people. I don't know, if it hit your house, it would be something to worry about. A double-decker bus. Oh, hell yeah. But insurance would be quite good at this point. If you're around.

Do they pay out for asteroids? Is it an act of God? So they always love a loophole insurance company. Imagine that. You get hit love a loophole insurance company, don't they? Imagine that. You get hit in a one in bajillion chance by an asteroid, and bloody AMI is like, no, you didn't read the fine print. Yeah, that's God doing that. God, that was a good movie, wasn't it?

The Man Who Sued God with Billy Connolly. Do you remember that film? I do remember that film. From the 90s or something? So asteroids smaller than 82 foot burn up in the Earth's atmosphere. And this one is between, they reckon, 12 and a half to 28 foot long. Good Lord. Is that smaller than a double-decker bus?

I don't know. This is in feet and miles. Tell me the feet again 28 28 foot long Oh that might be as long as a bus How many subways is that? 28 foot is 8 and a half metres long

Oh yeah Yeah Maybe one of those mini buses Mini double decker Like a little school bus Like a little school bus maybe A little school bus Yeah but that would

If it was going to hit us It would burn up Oh I don't even know Why we're talking about this. There's nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about at all. Famous last words. Yes.

Coming up on the show today, you've got a Hayley's version. Sure do. Eight o'clock, ten past eight. Yeah, I'll sing you something. Okay. And all I'll say is get your tissues ready. Okay. Oh, it's a sad one, is it?

Yeah. Okay. I thought I'd end, it's a sad one, is it? Yeah. Okay. I thought it'd end the week on a sad note. Coming up on the show, the top six. It's imminent. Yeah. Tomorrow night, Elton Jonathan will play in Auckland. And tonight, because I'm going to the tonight one. But I'm not talking about tonight's one.

I'm talking about tomorrow's one. Yeah, but you made it sound like he's only playing tomorrow. Well, you didn't let me finish my sentence. Yeah. Elton Jonathan, tomorrow night,, you didn't let me finish my sentence. Yeah. Elton Jonathan, tomorrow night, Elton Jonathan is playing in Auckland. Yes. And exclusively tomorrow, there's an issue with transport. Right.

But no issue tonight? No issue tonight. Okay. Your issue tonight is probably going to be how much rain and wind is happening. Oh, my God. And that old queen is going to get blown straight off stage. That old queen will be soggy at the end of it. Love a soggy queen.

His feather bows will be just soggy. We have no choice but to stan an old soggy queen. Very wet tonight, but tomorrow, no buses. How inconvenient. Is that a cool way, like no bus? No, no, no, not like the, no cap. He's bussing, no cap. I'm saying no buses, he's cap.

Oh. Yeah, unfortunately. So I've got the top six other ways to get to Elton John tomorrow night in Auckland. That's good, I haven't given it any thought. Next on the show. An OnlyFans model has made a very large gesture. There is a OnlyFans star model called Rebecca Goodwin. She's from the United Kingdom.

She makes around $175,000 a month, New Zealand. That is insane, eh? She's beautiful, that's for sure. That always helps. She looks like, you know, Jessica from Looney Tunes. Jessica Rabbit. Jessica Rabbit. No, she's from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Yeah, that's right.

She's got red hair and the same stunning figure. A voluptuous copper top. Voluptuous wee carrot. Yep. So she makes... Wait, how much? A hundred... And 75,000 New Zealand dollars a month.

A month. We're in the wrong Kmart. Got to get my ta-tas out. 175,000 times 12. Do they pay tax? That's just over two mil. They have to pay tax for wherever they were. Ask Shakira.

You have to pay tax for wherever you spend most of your year. And if it happens to be Spain, you go into jail. I'd move to the Cayman Islands or Dubai. Yeah, move there. But you have to physically spend time there. It's not like having a business space there. I can physically spend time in the Cayman Islands, although I don't think getting my baps out on my balcony in Dubai

at my apartment would probably get me a real well. Would it still go down well? Yeah, that's $2.1 million a year. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's $2.1 million a year. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's her average. Anyway, so she has started what she is calling an affordable housing scheme. She's recognised that the cost of living in the UK, terrible. A crisis they're calling it.

Probably similar to our own. People are struggling. And so she has started a scheme. She's buying, well, she started off by buying eight properties outright. Yeah. She doesn't need mortgages. She can buy eight houses. Two million dollars a year.

Yeah, and she's been at it for a while. And she's going to rent them out to low-income families that are struggling during the cost of living crisis in the UK. For very low. Just enough to cover the... Wait, so a woman on OnlyFans is doing what the government should be doing? Yeah.

Yes. Phenomenal. And they're not... She's been tweeting about it saying they're not terrible houses, they're great houses. Three-storey house, four bedrooms, three bathroom, off-road parking for two cars, fully furnished. How does she find these families?

Do she pick a couple of subscribers? I'm not quite sure. Maybe. Maybe this is how because she's got a lot of online followers. Maybe she says like... Or tweets out. Your dad's like, great news, we're moving into a new house. And your mum's like, how did you find this? And he's like, what? Yeah, a newspaper clipping.

Yeah, it cost me $19 a month. Yeah. But I belong to a subscription service which helps me find housing and other things. So she said that she earns enough from OnlyFans, her profit, that she has no mortgages. So the rent payments would be 100% profit. So she's going, I don't need it. She's got two points here. One is to help people so that all they have to do is cover the cost of maintenance and insurance.

Right. And then the second thing is she's got kids and she's going, well, you know, it's also an investment in their future. They can have them. Yeah, right. So the rent's not high either. It's just enough to cover. Yeah, no. The rent is super low.

That's why she's doing it. She's going like, I'll just help you out. I don't need the money. You need a house. Here you go. And she said that when she was a young mother, her and her kids lived off of food stamps. Yeah.

Well, food vouchers each week. And then she made it big on OnlyFans. And she was like, I'll just give back. That's amazing. Isn't that cool? I mean, the amount of money people make on OnlyFans is pretty extraordinary. Yeah, it's like when you heard about J.K. Rowling. When, you know, before the Harry Potter thing,

how she was struggling and then she got Harry Potter and she got rich and now she hates people that were born woman. In the wrong body. Yeah, yeah. Hates people that aren't cis woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, she does. Yeah.

She fell off the cliff pretty quickly, didn't she, with that whole... Yeah, she really, really did. She really did. She really did. So hopefully this woman just stays on the right side of things. Well, she hasn't made a comment on transgender people. That's always good. I think it's a good place to shut your mouth.

Just, yes. Wonderful. On something you don't know anything about. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, Australia at the moment debating dating apps and background checks for dating apps. Like police checks? Well, they're more mandatory

backgrounds, so I guess you would have to if you sign up to a dating app have some kind of maybe government ID, form of ID. Like a real ID or whatever. What a fantastic idea. Because if you were commenting on anything, even news stories or you were sending messages to people on dating apps,

and you were using your, you know, government ID. You are you. You are you. Yeah, you can't hide behind. You can't hide behind anonymity. You can't hide behind a fake profile. Yeah. It would change the way people interact.

Michelle Obama said it is harder to hate up close. Yeah. Vaughn. Wow. What do you mean, don't, Vaughn? That's Michelle Obama's quote. That was beautiful. That was Michelle Obama.

It was beautiful. Thank you. Yeah. Wow. But you always get that. Like, if people message in something here, and it doesn't happen a lot, but if you were to ring them or you were to hit them up and say,

oh, sorry about that. Oh, no, totally. Or they'd be like, that wasn't me. Oh, my cousin had my phone. Why? What did they send? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was a classic back in the day.

The moment you sort of put the onus back on you, eh? Yes. So if you have to be who you are. Michelle Obama said. Oh, my God. That was the worst part about lockdowns and everyone staying at home. Have you been listening to a podcast? I listened to a Conan O'Brien podcast with Michelle Obama.

Right. I'm just, that woman impresses me. She's amazing. I watched an interview with Michelle Obama the other day. Who was she having an interview with talking about marriage? Did you see this? And she's there and she was like, marriage is not equal.

You can never be equal in a marriage. Sometimes I'm 70, he's 30. Sometimes he's 80, I'm 20. Yeah, right. And it's give or take. You can't be equal all the time. It was powerful. She had lots of great things to say.

My mum's read her books, which really surprised me. Has she? Yeah, because my mum's not really an autobiography lady. Not because my mum's a racist. She's more of a... It really surprised me that my mum read a woman's book. Yeah.

My God. My Lord. No, just my mum's not really an autobiography lady. Well, she's done Fifty Shades, hasn't she? She's read that three times. Those pages are well-fed up.

I can't... To be totally honest, I don't know. She went to the movie. I thought we talked about this. She went to the movie. She went to the movie. She said it was a bit much. Oh, the movie was a bit much.

You know what I want to read? She's read the book. I want to read Michelle Obama's arm workout. Oh, guns. God, she had a set of arms on her. Why didn't they send those guns to the Middle East? Those are peacekeepers right there. Pow, pow, pow.

Peace and keeper. Sorry, what were you talking about? What was it? The background check. Australia, they're looking at background checks. I think so. So they've held meetings. Representatives from a lot of the dating apps

like Tinder, Bumble and all that were there. But I'm guessing it's just got to, I guess you've got to work out a way for it to kind of integrate with the apps or... You could tell who was there from Hinge because they didn't speak until spoken to. That's right. That's good from you.

Even though you've never been on Hinge. And the Tinder people stood behind a ranch lighter. And if you swiped right, the ranch lighter opened. And then you could talk to them. And Bumble, you just had to kind of happen across. Yeah. You know when you do something or get a job or whatever and you have to get a police check,

do you ever have that moment where you're like, ooh, even though I know I've never, ever committed a crime, I don't think I've ever had to have a police check. You're like, what if, no, you've done police checks for like things we've done for work and alcohol stuff. Yeah, like for ads and stuff, I've had police checks. Yeah. When you are the voice of, When you are the voice of something.

If you voice an alcohol brand or you promote an alcohol brand, they'll run a background check now. Because you can't have like a DUI on your history. You know, people have done this and, yeah, they've had a DUI and they didn't know about it and it's come back to haunt them. I've never been the voice of an alcohol brand. Yeah, right. I mean, what alcohol brand would I represent?

Probably like some Westie kind of brand. No, I reckon some like canned pink grapefruit gin. You know, like a girly gin. Yeah. I was thinking more of a Woodstock. Yeah. No, I'm not. Cody's, 8%.

8%. You'd be an 8%. You're an 8%. Hey, looking to get ripped and have way too much sugar in one hit. No, you can't say that. Yeah, that's good. Bourbon in a can, pre-mixed. Play ZM's Fletchford and Ailey from the Panoramic ZM Think Tank.

This is the Top Six. Now, over there in Auckland. Here in Auckland. Around in Auckland. Up, down. Up there, down. Sideways in Auckland This weekend

Out in John Now that's the big one That's the big one I wouldn't know I'm from the Chathams Right I'm currently broadcasting From my holiday home

In the Chathams I'm live Nobody admits to being From the Chathams I'd admit to being From the Chathams It's Norfolk Don't they all kiss their cousin

No no that's Norfolk Oh that's Norfolk Okay right So I apologise to our Chatham. The home of the pine, the Norfolk pine. Yes, okay. Are we apologising to our Chatham listeners again? Yes.

Right. I've accused them of kissing their cousins. Yes. I mean, we established last year in Chatham. No one lives in the Chathams and listens to the show, but I just don't want to get it back to them. Do we need to apologise to our Antarctic listeners? We did establish that we do have Antarctic listeners,

but they just weren't listening at the time. They listen posthumously. Yes. Posthumously. On the iHeartRadio app. Yeah. iHeartRadio. Where you can listen to the show live or at your own discretion

in podcast form. Anywhere. Out there, down there and around there, everywhere direction on the compass Penrose is a suburb of Auckland predominantly industrial

but bordering One Tree Hill and it's a stomp for the big stadium, it is, it's the one you used's a stop for the big stadium. It is. It's the one you used to get off at the big day out. Oh. The big day out. You'd walk down.

Yeah. You'd be like, it's going to be a bloody good day. It was 1,000 degrees. You were like, I forgot sunscreen, but I should be all right. You weren't going to be all right. That's the train station that's shut, and there's no trains running Saturday. No. They're running tonight, but you have to get a bus from some other train station.

And there's a bit of dismay because the... A little dismay? Auckland Transport has urged concertgoers to drive or walk to Mount Smart Stadium. It will be raining. Drive, take some cash and just drive close and there's always people with signs that are like... No, there's not enough car parks.

No, you park in the back of some industrial place. Yeah, then they tell you. And then they watch it. No, no, no, they watch it for you. Okay. How many people? The capacity is 40,000. Yeah, no, there's literally 40,000 people.

Not everybody can drive. It's ridiculous. Okay, so I've got the top six ways to get out in John. Okay. Given all that we've just discussed. Yep. Number six on the list. Why don't you take the yellow brick road?

Is this what this is going to be the whole time? That is an Elton John song. Yes, yep. Oh, you know, we've got that. From the 1973 album Goodbye, Yellow Brick Road. Okay.

You've got to watch it, though, because the cobbles are wearing, you know, they're sort of not level anymore. No. That Yellow Brick Road. I had that incident on the cobbles, didn't I, in Prague? Shoot yourself.

On the lime scooter, shat myself. Did you? Yeah, he was on a lime scooter. You shoot yourself in Prague? I had chemphorbacter. Oh, for God's sake. This guy always comes back from overseas with a gut infection. I know.

You're weak in the gut. I know. I used to be iron guts back in the day. Oh, man, iron guts rules. Oh, dear. Top six ways to get out and join with all this train stuff. Number five, take the rocket, man, iron guts rules. Top six ways to get out and join with all this train stuff. Number five, take the rocket, man. Oh, stop now.

Take the rocket, man. What would Michelle Obama think of this? Not much. I can't live up to the high expectations set upon me by Michelle Obama. I'm just having fun where I can. Number four on the list of the top six ways to get out in John with all these trainer shoes, borrow the Elton Hercules John that the Air Force have just retired. His middle name is Hercules.

And that is also the name of those big planes. Oh, yeah. That was the ones they just retired, eh? Yes. I think so, yeah. Yeah. Did you see the flyover? Oh, my God.

It was amazing. I wish I'd seen it. They literally took off and flew Like around New Zealand Over my house And then landed again back over my house I didn't see a thing Didn't you? Oh, I saw it

Look out, man Get off your phone, man Get off your phone I was probably beebling Beebling? Beebling What's that? It's the newest social media

He goes on Beeble I'm not on Beeble You're not on Beeble Oh my god, I'm downloading Beeble Yeah All the avatars What's its quirk? He goes on Bebel. I'm not on Bebel. You're not on Bebel. Oh, my God. I'm downloading Bebel. Yeah. All the avatars. What's its quirk?

Well, we're all bees. Okay. Yeah. And you people are like, hive, you balaltes. Right. You join a hive. Can I join your hive? Yep. Are you a hard worker?

Sometimes. Do you know the honey puffs jingle? Yeah. Okay, cool. You're on my Beable. Set up by Honeypuffs? Maybe. Spawn by Honeypuffs. Number three on the list of the top six ways to get to

out and john with all these train issues. Speaking of taking the aircraft, the Hercules, how about taking the Benny and the Jets? Taking the Benny and the Jets? Why don't you just say take the jet? Take Benny's jet. Why don't you just say take the jet? Take Benny's jet. Why don't you say, why don't you take the jets?

Benny and the jets. Okay. Number two on the list of the top six ways to get out and John. I thought these were going to be practical solutions. I've got to get on. I'm stuffed, yeah. This will work for you. Okay.

Top six ways to get out and John with all these trainer shoes. How about you take a tiny Datsun. Datsun. Okay, I like that. Okay, I'll take a tiny Datsun. Everybody get in the tiny Datsun. Do they still make Datsuns? Nope.

They became Nissans. Am I right about that? I think so. Okay. There might be a Datsun or two around. Oh, I'd love a Datsun 120Y. Oh, 180B. Those might be a Datsun or two around. Oh, I'd love a Datsun 120Y. Oh, 180B. Those were two rad Datsuns.

Has Hamilton Bogans come out? No, that's like, that'd be worth a fortune. A good one of those would be worth a fortune now. Collector's edition. Give me a reliable Nissan Teeter any day.

Oh, you and your Teeters. He won't stop going on about them. Well, you could take a Teeter tonight. It's small. It'd be great for parking. Yeah. Yeah, great. There's heaps of Datsuns on trade, by the way.

Are there? Imagine being so rich, you could buy a $500 car. Shit, yes, dude. What is that, a 120Y? Oh, that's $4,000. But imagine being so rich for this problem, like concert parking or any event parking. You're so rich. You won $23 million in Lotto the other week.

You go on Trade Me, you buy a $500 car, and then you just drive it right to the gate, get out, leave it. De-register it. De-register it, and then boom, it doesn't matter. Nah. Easy peasy. Or you could just actually probably get an Uber. Oh, I was going to say for $500, you could probably get a helicopter.

Yeah, oh, you're true. It could land on the secondary field. Didn't think about that, did I? And number one on the list of the top six ways to get to Elton John with all these train issues, something to do

with the Lion King soundtrack. I don't know. It was hard. Five were pushing it. Six was far too much for today. Right. You've checked out It's Friday. That was hard.

I was going to say Hakuna Matata, but I don't think it even had anything to do with that one. Circle of Life? Yeah, Circle of Life. Too hard. That's the day's top six.

Love me a bit of Price Spy, and what I'm about to say I don't want to come across as me encouraging you to spend, because we're trying to tighten the belt. We're trying to stop inflation. We're reining in, aren't we? No more shopping. We're pulling it in. Oh, really? Yesterday was it.

What'd you get yesterday? Just a couple of items. What kind of items? She went for one dress. I bought three. I thought you told us that leather jacket you purchased over the summer break was like your year's worth of clothing. Yeah, that was it. You're a naughty

girl. She's a naughty girl. You are the reason. Inflation is... Weddings. Tell my friends to stop having weddings. They're expensive, aren't they? They are. They're expensive. Right. Well, I can tell you... They're cute. Cute. Weddings are cute. One of them, I bought a fruity option and I bought a plain black option.

Now, the fruity option, they've both got puff sleeves because it's fun. The fruity option's a bit more breast heavy. But it could be that kind of wedding. Showing your breasts. Yeah, yeah, they're up and they're out. Okay, right. The black one's a little bit more conservative. Okay.

The third one's just more of an everyday one. So the third one was not necessarily a purchase that needed to happen yesterday. No, but I saw a woman in farmer's wearing it and I went up to her and I said, oh my God, I love your dress.

Where's it from? And she told me and I went to the shop and I got it. Okay, you've got a slight problem here with your spending. But I'll sell some stuff

on Trade Me. Right. Check out my Trade Me. Okay. That's my problem. Lincoln Buy. I can't sell. I just hate selling stuff.

So I can never justify buying something because I'm going to sell something I can never justify buying something Because I'm going to sell something else Because if I buy something it probably just means I'm going to put the other stuff in the clothing bin Or donate it to charity I don't want to go on about it You do a lot of charity

Do you think that dumping your used raggy clothing Into a clothing bin is charity Those undies have got a few wears left in them Oh my god Do you think someone could use That they've only got one toe hole. Yeah. Do you think someone could use that, use Raglan tea that you've had for five years?

It sort of was white, but now it's a bit, With a soy stain on it. Soy stain. Soy stain. When I have a clear out, like I wonder what they think when they open the bag, because they're just like,

it's the same thing. Yeah. It's 10 of the same thing. Because I buy, we buy, sorry, I know we're digressing, but I buy those bags of rags from Mitre 10.

You know those? Yeah, right. Paint rags in their old crap clothing. Yeah, they are. They cut up. Old people's T-shirts that they cut up and stuff. It'll be my T-shirts. I put down my windows with your bloody old raglins,

your soy raglins. All he does is raglins. Soy did you say? Why is there so much soy sauce on them? There's always a soy dribble on a rainbow. There's always a little stany dribble. It's a roll of the dice if I'm wearing a white T-shirt. So Price Spy have said that overall November is the cheapest retail month.

In the whole year? Yeah. Wow, okay. Because it's, I guess, they hike their prices for Christmas? Yeah, maybe it starts going back up towards Christmas and you take advantage of the last minute and the panic shop and everything. But November, you drop it to get people starting to spend, right?

Right. So Christmas shopping, bear in mind, November would be the best month if you're buying like electronics or toys. Because is this just electronics? No, no, no. This is sort of across the board. Right.

Food, drinks, stuff. Okay. June is the most expensive month in 2022. Prices were 7% higher on average than they were the rest of the year. Is that because there's just no reason for a sale? You know what I mean? A midwinter sale? There could be a midwinter sale.

There's no Easter sale or no Christmas sale. Tell that to Lily at Big Save. She'll find any excuse for a sale. Oh my God, I know. She knows how to find an excuse for a sale. Her and the Briscoe's lady must meet up for bloody coffee every week. Oh yeah, they do. They're besties.

Let's trick them into buying some more stuff. And then Rebel Sports is like, sorry I'm late. Sorry guys. What are we doing? We're going to blow their minds, are we? Oh, we were going to do a Thursday and a weekend. And then at the other table, Freedom Furniture's sitting there and Lily's like. And then she smells Freedom. So Freedom Furniture's sitting there and Lily's like, and then she smells Freedom.

So she looks and Freedom's like, She's like, I'll do a 50%. Yeah, take that. 60%, 24 months industry. Why is stuff more expensive in June? I don't get that? Don't I? I don't get that. Don't I? Winter?

We're not buying as much. Yeah, maybe we don't go out shopping. Or maybe we do buy more. And so they put it up because we're stuck at home. Yeah, we're stuck at

home. At the mall. So November, the cheapest retail month. June, the most expensive retail month for last year. And this month right

now, let me tell you about the month we're in, January, is the cheapest. Are you okay? It's that stuff I gargled just before. Gargled some iodine. I've got a burning throat.

It's not COVID. I've tested 18 million times in the last two days. Your nose looks a bit sore, actually. I had the nose, you can have a coke out of that glass. Jeez, I was like, God, it's just going straight in again. Remember the good old days of a rat test every day where you're just like, and it goes, slips in. You forget how deep it is. You almost lose the swab up there.

Anyway, this month apparently is the best time to buy gaming consoles. Yeah. So. Do they ever change in price? Apparently do. Maybe it's because genuinely the weather's a bit nicer. So you're outside. Yeah.

And so they're like, no, no, no. Come back in. Lego also down from $266 to $243 on average. So there's a Lego. There's a lot of extra Christmas stock as well that retailers are trying to shift. Yeah. And DSLR cameras are down this month apparently. Now the worst items to buy this month are portable speakers, home security cameras,

pushchairs, prams, and strollers. Now home security cameras will be because heaps of people are going on holiday and they're panicking last minute. They haven't got security, so that's a demand thing, isn't it? Portable speakers because assholes take them to the beach and force us all to listen to their bloody shit music days. There's nothing wrong with a portable speaker at the beach if it's turned down. There's one right here.

You were at the beach and we had a portable speaker and you loved it. You brought it and he played the bloody White Lotus theme song at the beach. Oh my God. He was just trying to have a nice night. Yeah, I got down with it, but it wasn't my choice. So yeah, there's a really interesting article on the best time of year to buy things and when to avoid buying things. Push prams and strollers and stuff. Yeah, I'm not sure on that.

I was reading something about the most common times that people have babies and it's usually the end of the year. Right, so they're ready to get them outside. They're ready to get these little buggers out there for a bit of ear. It's the Final Rankings.

Well, Final Rankings is back for 2023. We normally rank our favourite foods. Yeah. Just rank our favourite things. Today, well, yesterday when we were deciding what we would do for Final Rankings, was this your idea? It was my idea. Favourite fingers.

Favourite fingers. Have we been talking about fingers? Because I remember the day before, like, chuckling to myself in a meeting that it would be funny to rank your fingers. No, I think we were just in sync. We've synced up. Yeah, I think you have. We've synced up.

God, how bad is this month? Are we counting the thumb? Yeah, that's a finger. No. It is. I think we should just count the thumb. No, come on. Because the thumb is the champion.

The thumb is what makes us better. No, we'll make that your number one then. We've got opposable thumbs. No, but I was going to say... Without the thumb, the fingers are nothing. Yeah, he's got a point. The fingers can't function as a hand. To me, the thumb is the champion.

It's what sets us apart from other primates. No, a thumb is a finger. A thumb... Producer Jared is saying a thumb is a digit, but not technically a finger. Because the thumb's got to be the winner. What the hell does that mean? It gives us our grit.

I think for the sake of this Friday Rankings, we disclude, we... Eliminate. We eliminate the thumb. I can't believe this. The thumb's right up there for me. Was that going to be your number one? It wasn't going to be my number one. Okay, my number one's obviously index finger.

It's hard to beat. It's hard to beat. It's hard to beat. I always push the buttons with this one. Yeah. But you know what? The pinky is number two for me because it goes in your ear. And it's elegant when it's popped up when you're holding a glass. These two middle ones.

And it's quite essential to the grip, the pinky. Yes. You know, they say people lose their little toe and they're like, whoa, my balance is far more effective than it was if you lost another toe. But I think it would be the same with the pinky. It really supplies that end hand grip there. Lost without it.

Yeah. I can't believe you're discounting the middle finger. It's thick, it's long, it's strong. It is the strongest of the middle. Apart from ripping the fingers. Yeah, but how good does that feel? How good is it? I think it's the ring finger that's got to go,

because I can't even, like, it's hard to hold it straight. The ring finger is the one that I would give. Yeah. You know, in a heartbeat. You'd give up. I'd be like, oh, get rid.

Get rid. Other than being symbolic for romance and fat load of good that's doing me. Yeah. Well, you're still waiting. Rocking around this ring.

Yeah. Still waiting, aren't you? I just, I think, definitely the ring finger's the dud. Okay, that would be your last one. Okay. Surgeons have weighed in. Oh, thank God.

Oh, here we go. Of all your fingers, you might think the pinky's the most useless, but your little finger is particularly important to a strong grip, and hand surgeons agree if you're going to lose one finger, the index finger is the best to lose. What? No. I guess if you lost that, then your next one

becomes the index, right? No, the middle one. The middle one would just take on the role. It would take on the role. Very integral to typing. Unless you're a two-finger typer like you are.

I'm not a two-finger typer. I'm at least a four or five. Without the index. You'd adapt. Yeah, you'd adapt. But you wouldn't want to lose your pinky. But that doesn't make it

my favourite just because it's the most important. When it comes to picking the nose, of which I do a lot, index is great, but also hooking the thumb in there is a fave. But every now and then, if you've got a sharp little hoopay,

the pinky's good. Oh, the pinky's great. Because it's often got a slightly longer nail as well, so you can absolutely just scrape the sides. Okay, so final rankings. Fingers. From worst to best, I think we agree. Yeah. Ring final rankings. Fingers. From worst to best, I think we agree.

Yeah. Ring fingers suck. Ring fingers. Last. Gone. Other middle finger. Middle fingers next. Good for expression,

but not much else. Pinky. Then the pinky. Index is superior. I don't know if the surgeons have changed my mind about the index being the most important.

Yeah, but it's not about what's the most important. It's about your favourite finger. Your favourites. Man, if you've got to. Okay, so your... But I think it's two votes to one. Yeah, the ring plays little Roland.

Yeah. In any of that. So index finger most important. That's why that one's... The favourite. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Rock and roll.

That was pretty easy, that one. That was an easy one, wasn't it? The fingers are clear. Well, maybe next week we could do other fingers. Fish fingers. Chocolate fingers. Chocolate fingers. Lady fingers.

They're little nannies, aren't they? Yeah, lady finger nannies. And then what are the fingers that you put in a tiramisu? A wafer fingers. You know, the little bready fingers that you soak with coffee and booze? Or the little bread when you dip your soldiers into eggs. No, they're soldiers. That's a bread finger.

That's a soldier. That's a bread finger. You're absolutely struggling now. Yeah, I don't think we can think of enough fingers. You're really scraper. Clay, Zed-Ems, Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, this news comes to us from Twitter. It must be correct.

It must be correct. An analysis, a visualisation. Did you trip up on analysis? News comes to us from Twitter. It must be correct. It must be correct. An analysis, a visualization. Did you trip up on what? An analysis. An analysis, yeah. A visualization created by an analyst, James, shows how many days since the 50s were actually a good day in Wellington.

You know the saying? You can't beat Wellington on a good day. And, you know, regions love to vie for, you know, the sunniest place. Oh, Wellington is never vying for the sunniest place. It knows. It knows. As a Wellingtonian, it knows. It knows.

But holy heck. Well, my home region, I believe, correct me if I'm wrong, was crowned the sunniest. New Plymouth. 2022. Yeah. Taranaki region, the sunniest region in Aotearoa. Like beating now. Pipping out the Bay of Plenty.

Wow. And Nelson. It beat up north. It always used to be Nelson and Blenheim vying for the most sunniest places. Why has that changed? Yeah, I would have thought Hawke's Bay or Bay of Plenty. I don't think you needying for the most sunniest places. Why has that changed? Yeah, I would have thought Hawke's Bay or Bay of Blenheim. I don't think you need to say the most sunniest. I think by saying the sunniest, you are...

Oh, yeah, it's a redundant word there, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It just felt funny. I just wanted to correct it there. The mostest sunniest. The mostest of sunniest. Of sunniest places. The mostest sunniest.

Well, this data, this NIWA data was collected going back to the 1st of January 1954. And this guy has worked out that 7% of days in Wellington have ever been good, let alone unbeatable. So that's 1,839 days or just over five years of unbeatable Wellington skies across 69 years. It's a dribbly little place. So whenever it rains, it dribbles. The yearly average in Wellington, 26 good days. The year 1971 had 46 the most. No, but like when, like summer is longer than that.

Yes. But yes, it's not always the whole day being perfect. Yeah, and there might be windy. There might be a lot of wind. Or like some cloud and stuff. But those days. But those days. They're amazing.

It's worth it. When they happen. I think it was Michelle Obama that said, you know, you've got to. The dawn, the night is darkest before the dawn. No, that was Florence and the Machine. Was it? Yeah. Might have been Batman too.

No, I don't know if it was. Could have been Shakespeare. Let's just say it was Florence and the Machine. Was it? Yeah. Might have been Batman too. No, I don't know if it was. Could have been Shakespeare. Let's just say it was Michelle Obama. Right. Maybe that's why the good days in Wellington feel so good is because they're only 7%. So when you get there and it's like, when you land at Wellington and it's smooth in a plane

and you're like, that was nice. And then you get out and you're like, that's nice. And then you drive around. The bays. The bays to get into town. Oriental and that. And you're just like, that's nice. And then you get out and you're like, that's nice. And then you drive around the bays to get into town oriental and that. And you're just like, that's nice. It is a town set up for good weather. Like, it is a town that exists,

it's centred around a waterfront. But again, only 7%. I mean, yeah. A year. Shit, when it howls, it howls, eh? Yeah, the amount of times I've sat in my car and just waited till it was safe to get into my house. Yeah.

So much. You open the door, the wind's so strong it blows your door inside out. I still don't trust umbrellas, even though I live in Auckland now. I can't because I'm too scarred. Well, today I'm very excited on behalf of all of us to announce a podcast. Excuse me, I'll be excited on my own behalf. No, I've taken the order.

I'm doing the little things here. You can take my excitement. Have I got it? Yeah, you've got it. I don't dish my excitement out easily. Get on board. May I? You may not. I'm shielding my cards close to my chest. I'll tell you whether or not I'm excited. On behalf of Fletch and I, I'm excited to announce

coming to the ZM podcast is a new podcast from Jazz Thornton. It is called Hope Is Real and Jazz joins us in studio before I... Why didn't you say so? Here's my sign. Okay, thank you very much. More energics. Morning. Thank you so much for joining us. For a

soft launch. Now look, it's a medium launch. Behind the scenes we've been told that we're soft launching this podcast but it's not available yet. It's not available. To me that's not launching anything. No, no, we've been told that we're soft launching this podcast. But it's not available yet. It's not available. To me, that's not launching anything. No, no. We're announcing. Yeah, but it's an announcement, not a soft launch. Yeah, but we don't go like, oh,

Pink is in New Zealand tonight. You go, she's coming. That's an announcement. That's what I'm doing. It's already been announced. Would that be correct, Jez? It's getting announced today. Is it today?

That's why we're here. This is what we're doing. I'm soft launching. Okay. It's not a soft launch. Never mind. Let's talk about the podcast. It's a trailer launch.

It's a Comic-Con launch where all of a sudden the people from the movie are there with a little teaser trailer. Right. Is there a trailer? There is a trailer. Okay, so I think we've got a Comic-Con panel launch here. Okay, we've got a Comic-Con. We're Comic, we've got a Comic Con. We're Comic Con launching. Comic Con panel launch. Hope is real. Jazz, tell us a bit about what the podcast

the pod-podcast. Podcast. Tell us a little bit about what the podcast is about. Well, the podcast. The podcast is called Hope is Real. We've been interviewing people from all around the world. Basically, hearing a whole bunch of people's stories. Everything, covering everything from eating disorders, OCD,

to bipolar, to someone who attempted to take their life over the Golden Gate Bridge and survived. Crazy stories of survival. Is that the one that was rescued by a seal? Yes. Was that the guy in the movie? Yes, in the documentary. Oh, my God.

Phenomenal documentary. His story's insane. And I got to hear the full details of it. It's just incredible. I also did a whole episode on what your therapist really thinks about you, which was super fun. So I'm very, very excited. It's the kind of thing I wish I had as a teenager.

The look on Hayley's face when you said what your therapist really thinks about you. I made a show a number of years ago, and I, as part of the show, wanted to include some notes from my therapist from when I was a teenager. My parents sent me to a therapist. I was going through some stuff and I rung up and I said, oh, Ula. Ula was my therapist here

and they said, oh, she's left long ago and then they reached out to her to find my notes and she didn't have them but she said, I wish you well and it made me feel really weird.

I was like, she burned them in a sacrificial sort of burning. Yeah, she said, oh my God, good luck to her. She put your notes surrounded with sage.

Yeah. And then smoked it through the office. Curse this woman. Let's remove it from our being. Now, obviously, like, we're having a good laugh now. And, like, what is the tone of the podcast? Because you're obviously talking about some really serious issues. I know things that are very dear to your heart.

You're a huge mental health advocate. It's not all laughter. It's definitely not all laughter, but there's definitely laughter in there. Like, I expose myself more on that podcast than I think I ever. I was followed by cameras for two and a half years for the film, and I didn't expose myself as much as I have on this. Wow.

All of the blimmin' things that come with ADHD, all of those things. So, it's definitely a mix. There's some episodes, like Kevin's one, that is a lot more serious than the others. But every episode is so different and we've done that purposefully. So there are some that are very intense and there are others that are super fun and just talking about kind of everyday issues. What is it that drives you?

Because I feel – how old are you if you don't mind me asking? 27. And you have millions of followers on social media, online, everywhere, that look to you as someone to help them a lot, someone to give them advice. What keeps you going? Because for me, that feels so overwhelming. I would feel really overwhelmed by that and a deep pressure. There's definitely a lot of pressure to it, but I think that I will often just think of, you know, 12-year-old Jazz and being like, this is everything that I wish that I had back then not for me but that I wish someone else was doing it and I wish that I could hear these stories and feel less alone and I get stopped in the street every single day by people that will show me their I am sober app and see how long they've been free from self-harm and that kind

of thing I'm like if you can create something that so many people relate to and just need to know that there's hope then it's so worth it. The pressure's worth it. It's a lot at times. It's very much like, I've had people turn up to my house. Like, it's a lot. Oh, wow.

Really? Don't recommend. Please don't do that. I will kick you out. Yeah, please don't do that. But it's not the courier. I won't kick out the courier because they bring all my packages.

I kick out the courier. Get the dogs all racked up. How do they find out where you live? I mean, don't say, because maybe that will lead more people to find out. I think it's really easy to find out where anyone in New Zealand lives.

Yeah, it's a lot. And I definitely freaked out the first time that that happened. Yeah, so there's obviously there's a lot. There's a lot of pressure to it and there's a lot of stuff

that I guess comes with being in the public eye, especially for what I am known for. Yes. But, you know, just to know that people are finding hope

is worth it as long as you don't turn up to my house. Yes. But, you know, just to know that people are finding hope is worth it as long as you don't turn up to my house. Yeah. Do you think this is your life's work? Like, this is what you are here to do?

If you think of it in a deeper sense of being. Absolutely. And I think that it's really cool to be able to do that in all forms. I can enter

and I get to write books and at the moment I'm working on a movie project over in the States and everything is about hope-filled storytelling. And 100%, I look back at my life and as hard as it was, I would never take any of it back because that is the reason that I get to not just do what I do, but I get to relate to so many different people.

And because of that, I know that hope's real and I can show that to other people. So it definitely feels like it's become my purpose. And I also love that I get to have fun along the way. I got to do things like Dancing with the Stars and still fundraise for mental health and talk about it. But it's, yeah. Not only do you do Dancing with the Stars, you won it.

Now, what about the fact you gave everybody COVID? I did not give anyone COVID. No, you exposed them to COVID. That's incorrect information. I've already had it twice. Oh, really? I was not give anyone COVID. No, you exposed them to COVID. That's incorrect information. I've already had it twice. Oh, really? When I was in America and before that,

I was the only one that did not get COVID, thank you. Oh, really? One of the only ones, yeah. That was a super spreader event. It really was. All of the Reece Mathewson

supporters really believed that it was me, but it was not. I love Reece. So it was Reece Mathewson? I mean, Reece got it, but no one wanted him to go out.

So it was Reece Mathewson. You also got a boyfriend on it, but no one wanted him to go out. So it was Rhys Matheson. You also got a boyfriend on that show, didn't you? I did. That's so exciting. I mean, I follow you deeply on social media. Have you done a soft launch or a hard launch with him on Instagram? I soft launched him. See, that's what we're doing now.

When did you soft launch him? I soft launched him, it was about four months after dating. We didn't go out in public at all. And then I started seeing videos on TikTok pop up of us in like Mission Bay from like a hundred meters away and people had like zoomed up. And I was like, I have to hard launch it. Oh yeah. So then you soft launch to a hard launch.

Then a hard launch. I just literally put up like 10 Instagram photos and was just like cut. Was he your dancing partner? No, he was not. He was, he was behind the scenes. He was our cameraman. He looked like Jackson Avery from Grey's Anatomy. Okay.

Which one? They aren't. He's got the blue, dark skin, very blue eyes. Oh, my God. Now you're talking my language. If you say dark skin, blue eyes, divorce, look at him. He can't get their bloody grown-up face. He can't get away from them.

Far out. Well, welcome to the ZM Podcast Network. Do we have a date? What's the release date? Is that a hard launch? Will we hard launch? We should have the hard launch. We'll be hard launching

the podcast March. March the 2nd, I believe. March the 2nd. Okay. Hope is real. Jazz Thornton, thank you so much for coming in. Thank you so much for having me.

Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. Play ZM. For a little while now, I've had a sore throat. I think it initially started just before we came back, slept with the air con on one night. Oh, that'll dry you out. That'll do it.

That'll dehydrate the vocal cords. Any hotel, you wake up and you're like... Yeah, sometimes it's better to sleep hot. Yeah. Keep some moisture in the room. Like kick the sheets off and stuff, but at least keep some moisture in the room. You're not slowly...

Fans are better. Turning yourself into a sun-dried tomato. So it started, it's got progressively worse. I've been testing for COVID, you know, doing my part. It's not that. Ratting up the old schnolls. Getting in the throat and the schnolls as well. Yeah, you, oh my God. Watching Vaughan do a rat test is an image I will never forget for my whole life.

I try to do them like subtly at home and I'll sneak into the back part of the kitchen and I'll be like. And the girls are like, Dad's doing a rat test. And then my eyes are running and my nose is running. Terrible gag reflex. It's awful. Honestly, shame on you. Awful. Really out of practice.

Yeah. And anyway. We've been doing it daily for a while. Yeah. Rat test come to work. Yeah, shame on you. Awful. Really out of practice. Yeah. Well, you've been doing it daily for a while. Yeah. Rat test come to work. Yeah, we were, eh? All those rat tests. So a little out of practice, but I'm getting back into it now.

But it's not COVID and that's kind of annoying because at least if it was, you'd know what the story was. Yeah. It's just this awfully sore throat. So I went yesterday to the pharmacy to get some, because my mum goes on about this iodine throat gargle. Yes, it's the best. And it's antibacterial as well, right? The red stuff.

Yeah, betadine. I got another one. Right. Was betadine you have to mix yourself? Did you go off brand? No, it was like a cold brand. Oh, right. It's like another well-known brand,

but the betadine you've got to mix yourself. You've got Pam's throat gaggle. And I just wanted to do it right. Yeah, the no frills throat gaggle. Budget. So I'm one of those people, the minute I get in the car from the pharmacy, I just start.

Like if there's like multivitamins or anything, or I'll just, I'm'll just... I'm eating everything. Nasal spray. Boom, boom, boom. I'm administering it all in the car. So I do all that and then I take a mouthful of this gargle and I start driving. So I'm kind of drivel gargling.

Drive, drive, drive. Don't you tip your head back? Yeah. That's dangerous driving. I can still see the road. And I'm driving. then when I get to that Do you mouthwash in the morning? Do you mouthwash before you leave?

I don't Nah not every morning Right I've gone off mouthwash I don't know why I do a lot of this when I mouthwash I'm getting it between the teeth More than I'm gargling it

But I'll always give it a gargle Before I spit Yeah And so I'm driving And when I get to a Like an intersection I stop And I put my head down And I go Hold it there In the mouth And then so I'm driving and when I get to a, like an intersection, I stop and I put my head down

and I go, hold it there in the mouth. And then when I'm driving, I get a, so I'm like, uh-oh. And I start, I just,

you know, when you've got a cough coming. Almost swallow. And I've got to get it out of my mouth because I'm, everything's about to start happening. The sneezing, the coughing,

every, it's, it's hit something here it comes and so I stop it in a section and I open the door and as I open the door

I look across into the car and there's a teenage girl and her mum and they're looking at me and they're waving I don't know these people so I assume they must

listen to the show alright they're waving hi and I'm like spit this gargle onto the road, which is iodine. So it looks like blood. It looks like.

Oh, my God. And then I take a little water look up because I'm trying to get it on my mouth. And I look up and they're just turned and they're just looking straight ahead. And the mom, I'm pretty sure I can read her lips being like, don't look at him. Well, because they think Vaughan Smith's vomiting blood. Oh, my God, he's on the way out. He's on the way, he's dying. What is this?

Does he have tuberculosis? Yeah. See a doctor, for Christ's sake, man. It's treatable in the modern era. Jeepers. So, yeah, they think I'm vomiting blood at 5 o'clock on a Thursday. Yeah. And did you explain yourself?

The light went green and then they were looking at me. What, was I supposed to get out of the car and be like, open the window, I'll tell you what's happening. He's got a terrible disease. Don't look at him, honey, we'll be home soon. We'll be safe from the scary man from the radio. Yeah, what was the plan? What was the plan?

Where were you going to spit this? I was always going to spit it out the window. Oh, my God. Oh, for God's sake. But I was, like, not far from it being rural. Right. So I could have rurally spat. The rules change when you hit the 80K zone.

It truly does. Anything out the window. Asbestos. Yeah. Plastic. Anything. Sniggies. It really is.

People just chuck it all out the window. So I thought, oh, man, spitting. I hadn't thought is. People just chuckled all over the window, so I thought, a man's spitting. I hadn't thought about the colour until I spat it onto the road, and I was like, oh, my God, that looks like blood, and I was getting the rest out of my mouth, and then I looked up, and they were just like, eyes straight ahead. Oh, my God.

Don't look at him. Add those to the soy stains on the Raglan T-shirt. Oh, God, he is... You're a stainer. You're a hucky man. It looks like I choked on, but I'm weeping at the eyes. Yeah. My nose is running.

Sorry. So you've got some sort of zombie flesh infection. Rabies. You'll see it on Spy News. ZDM host Vaughn Smith has rabies. Well, I don't know your name. You were in a Bluish Okay Bluish car

Apologies to that family So many apologies Yeah Very upsetting I hope I didn't put anybody Off their dinner Or ruin your day or anything You've got a sore throat

You've got a rash And we want to talk about this next Because you've been abusing Because it's spreading I even made Fletch Look at it this morning Look at this Have you had to look at the rash?

Dude Dr Vaughn knows exactly What's causing that rash We went for a walk after the show yesterday, and Hayley's like, that's the weed I was pulling out in the public garden. So I was like, Hayley, that's woolly nightshade. That's like the worst weed for agitation.

Which, by the way, she was pulling out, because you recommended to wear protective gear and goggles. You have to. When I pulled it out, when you were in the workplace and cut it down, I was in full PPE. And you pulled it out in your knickers. I was wearing little shorts and my bra. And your bra, yeah, okay.

Play. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Well, we've talked about your rash a bit this week on the show. It's like rash watch because it's growing. Started on the arms. Fletch, Vaughan, Hayley and Hayley's rash. Yeah. The fourth player. Just doing the shrug for a bit.

Spread to the upper arms. Spread to my thighs two days ago. Spread over the whole thigh and this morning it's on the back of the knees. It's definitely the noxious weeds. You reckon it's the noxious weeds? Dude, you are tangoing with woolly nightshade. The worst. Have you googled woolly nightshade? No, dear not.

And it's a carcinogen. You can't even burn it. It poisons the ground around it so other plants can't grow. It's like Brazil's nastiest little bitch. And Brazil has some nasty little bitches. Brazil's nasty little papayas. When you pointed that out in the garden, I was like, I've seen that everywhere.

Dude, there needs to be. And this is Vaughan Smith, agriculturalist, horticulturalist, and land lad. And community man. Auckland needs to do a campaign telling people that this is not something cool that's growing in your garden with a big green leaf and lovely purple berries when they mature. This is the craziest weed known to man. It's the perfect killer. Right, and Hayley, you uprooted this in your bra and shorts. Yes, I know,

but also, like, it could be a mixture of things, because I was in the sun all weekend, very exposed. I didn't get sunburnt. I was dealing with this poisonous weed, dealing with fibreglass, pulling out old pink bats. There's a myriad of things it could have been.

Oh, yeah, pink bats will do it too. You've sought medical advice. Yeah, well, I can't be bothered going to my doctor. Well, because you don't have one. And I don't have one. She abandoned me and moved to New Plymouth, and I miss her. So I haven't found myself a new doctor. And I don't have time,

and I don't want to pay 65 bucks for them to say that it's heat rash. Yeah. And put hydrocortisone on it. I went to the pharmacy and asked them, remember? And they were like, I'm not sure what it is.

It looks fine. You just take some antihistamines. And the lady did a wide berth and left you. And then a lady left because she didn't want to catch whatever I've got. Yeah.

So I messaged our friend, Dr. Shawnee, who he's a friend of yours that is now a friend of mine. Now this is Hummerzine. Well, no, he was involved. Hummerzine was in the Hummerzine. Well, he was in the Hummerzine. He didn't order the Hummerzine.

And then the next week when I saw him, he was like, let's do a Hummerzine. This guy is obsessed with Hummerzines. He does love a Hummerzine. Yeah. Absolutely. So I just was like, well, why have a doctor as a friend If you can't consult them Because that's their job He doesn't want to do it

He does it all day He doesn't want to do it after hours But I'm his friend so he helped me out So at 2.30 on Wednesday I said help me Dr. Shawnee What the F is happening to me And I sent him photos of all my arms and stuff So before he said I'd help you

You just send him photos of your rashy breasts and thigh. I sent him like six messages. My breasts are not rashy. My breasts are fine. You need a balance from Dr. Shawnee what you're sending him. Yeah, it can't always be, hey, I need medical advice. You need to be like, hey, how's it going? Have you sent some memes?

Oh, I didn't do any memes. I didn't ask him about the garden. He put a lot of time into his garden. Yeah, have you asked him about how he's going? No, no, I sent him a picture of my upper thighs and I said, this stuff's all over both arms and now it's started

on top of my thighs. Cue picture of the thigh. This is before it spread. And he came back a minute later. What a good friend. Is it it, she? Yeah, yeah.

Then I said, a little bit, and off he went. Any new medications are you taking regularly? Is it still spreading? Like you said, have you been weeding?

Is it the heat after something? And he just gave me some great, any hydrocortisone? Is that helping spreading? Like you said, you've been weeding. Is it the heat after something? And he just gave me some great any hydrocortisone. Is that helping at the moment? And then we had this chat and he was like, I don't think, I think it looks like

an allergic reaction. Right. But I did send an update yesterday saying, help me Dr. Shawnee, it's spreading. Okay. Were you left on scene?

Yeah. No, no, no. He said that they don't look pus filled. Okay, which is great. Because that would mean a vesicle would be pus-filled and that would be viral, in which case you guys might get it. Because I made you look, Fletch, quite close this morning at the thigh

in the back of the knee. He said, let me know if things change. And then I told him about the weeding and the bats and stuff. And then he did apologise. Sorry for slow and the bats and stuff. And then he did apologise. Sorry for slow replies. I've been texting you between patients. See, he's working! He's working! He is working for me

in this moment. This is what I want to ask is when people ask you for free stuff or to do your job after hours. Graphic designers get this all the time. Can you just whip up my get this all the time. Oh yeah. Can you just whip up my wedding invites?

Yeah. It won't take you long. It's nothing. Or like going to a friend who's a hairdresser and saying, would you mind just give me a quick trim?

Ah. They would hate that. It's like when you get, I was thinking when you said doctors, skin doctors particularly. Look at this. You can show them

right then and there. Oh yeah. But if you're trying to describe what's happening internally, you know, tests and swabs and all that, that sort of thing, we need a poo poo sample. there. But if you're trying to describe what's happening internally, you know, tests and swabs and all that sort of thing, we need a poo-poo sample. Yeah.

But if it's just like something they can see. Is that what they call it? The poo-poo sample. Last time I went to the doctor, we need a poo-poo sample. My brother-in-law is a... The doctor was a four-year-old. Oh, right. Daddy, we need you to do a poo-poo sample.

Okay. My brother is... Hell of a thing to explain to your wife when she comes home, you're playing doctors and nurses and you're taking a shit in a systema. Okay. My brother... Hell of a thing to explain to your wife when she comes home, you're playing doctors and nurses and you're taking a shit in a systema. But... I was just following doctor's orders. Who am I to question this child?

Exactly. My brother-in-law's a doctor, but he's a... What's the baby doctors? Pediatrician. Paleontologist. Paleontologist. He's a paleon...

He's a baby doctor. Why didn't you message him about that? Oh, because he's babies. Just does babies. I know, but every time me and Aaron say, like, what do you reckon this is? And we show him a mole or something, he's like, you're not a baby. I'm not going to about that? Oh, because he's babies. Just does babies. I know, but every time me and Aaron say, like, what do you reckon this is? And we show him a mole or something, he's like, you're not a baby.

I'm not going to help you. Oh, wow. So he's cut you off from medical advice. No, he knows lots of things, but he's always like, do you know what I do? I specialise in surgery on babies. And you're asking me to look at your mole and see if it's strange that the hair has gone coarser.

He should have an idea. He's like, leave me alone. It's Christmas Day. So this is a question we want to ask this morning. What do people expect you to do for free because of what you do for a job or your skill set? Yeah. And maybe do you have a way of, if you just get sick of it,

of just ignoring them or saying no? Absolutely. It's hard to say no to your friends though, isn't it? Maybe you're a mechanic and people are always like, oh my God, it's a beautiful day, let's go for a drive. And then as you're driving, they're like, can you hear that? Can you feel that rumble underneath the feet? What are you looking at?

So pull it over and have a look. Do you reckon you should turn a blind eye to the bald tyres I've got on my car and give me a warrant for it? Yeah. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. We want to know now what people expect you to do for free, maybe because of your skill set or your job.

Yeah. I have used the services of my doctor friend to help diagnose and analyze what is happening with the ever-growing rash on my body. Which keeps kind of spreading, yeah. Behind the knees now. Actually, I know Dr. Shawnee's listening. Dr. Shawnee, do you think it's weird

that it's now behind the knees? This is Dr. Shawnee, Hamazine enthusiast. Yes. Big Ham, do you think it's weird that it's now behind the knees? This is Dr. Shawnee, the Hummerzine enthusiast. Yes. Big Hummerzine guy. Big Hummerzine guy. Anonymous joins us. Anonymous, what do people expect you to do for free because of work? My job, I work in HR and I constantly have

friends or family asking me to either represent them or their friends and family in employment cases at their work. Oh, wow. Okay. And is that awkward? A little bit, especially when you know that the person was a little bit in the wrong.

And so you're just trying to make sure it's a fair process. Yeah. You're like, Gavin, you stole a tractor from your workplace. They've got every right to fire you. Yeah, I can't help you with this one. Exactly. So then you're like, well, let's just make sure it's a clean fair process. But yeah, it takes a

lot of time out of work helping prepare people for these cases and then having to go in and meet with their employers and their lawyers. Never any kind of offer of pay? No, sometimes you'll get like a bottle of wine or something after this and they'll get a big payout of something after they get it, but like, they'll get a big payout of like $25,000,

$30,000, and then you're like, oh, thanks for the wine. Oh, what? Yeah, you'd expect a little bit of cash. I mean, I feel like that's something you'd do for a really close friend, but no one else. Family, maybe. Yeah. Yeah. Totally. Wow, Anonymous, thank you. Some more messages in. Actually, can I just interrupt? Sorry, I've had a

message from Dr. Shawnee. Yeah. Just letting you know, I've been consulting Fletch the last few days as well. Some more messages in. Actually, can I just interrupt? Sorry, I've had a message from Dr. Shawnee. Yeah. Just letting you know, I've been consulting Fletch the last few days as well. He's no angel. We should send him a photo of my throat. I don't know if he can just... He's busy with the rack.

No, and plus I've had a question as well. Yeah, no. He's busy with the rack. Can we send him a photo of my throat? But then how do I get... Can he fax me a prescription? I've got a really good camera. Just hit me with some antibiotics.

Hang on a sec. I don't know if I want you... Photo. I don't know if I want you... I'll put the flash on. I don't know if I want you in there. Open up. Yeah, go on.

I've got a funny dangler. I've got a funny dangler. Oh, wow. Yeah, that's good stuff. Thank you. I'll send a photo. Send that, please. All right, well, keep your tits...

Because apparently strep throat's rife at the moment. Someone's messaged me. Who said that? And I'm trying to reset my password on Health 365 patient portal so I can try to get a bloody doctor's appointment. Oh, for God's sake. Who do I blame now that Jacinda's gone? Whose fault is it that I'm not getting an immediate email

to reset my password? Someone's to blame. I think you are. I probably am. Play ZM's Fletchford and Hayley. Talking about the things that people expect you to do for free. This is a great show. I just think we're having a great show. We're having a great time, aren't we?

Looking at what's ahead, what we've done. Fantastic work, everyone. Well, don't worry about what we've done. It's all about what's yet to come, you know. It was Michelle Obama that said. Oh my God, stop quoting Michelle Obama. Eyes on the future. Eyes on the future, Barack. That's what she said. Some messages in. Well, somebody actually, because we've been talking about Dr. Shawnee,

a hummerzine enthusiast, who's been dealing with Hayley, you, and now me. With your throat. With my sore throat. All for free, by the way. Somebody said, WTF is a hummerzine? Is this a magazine about hummers? No. Take it away.

Well, it is a hummer. The US, of course, the first generation Hummers were US military vehicles, but people loved them so much they evolved. A Hummerzine is a limousine version of a Hummer. So the Hummer is like a big Jeep style. Huge. Obnoxious. Big, fat, obnoxious.

And I was captured. Last year I was captured at a party and made to ride in it, and people were looking at me like... You can imagine this one. Faked his own abduction. I loved that hummus. Oh no, oh no, please no. He was absolutely dribbling for that hummus.

And ever since Dr. Shawnee, I think every weekend, is offering to get one. Let's get a hummus again. I'm like, just calm down. Just calm down. But back to the topic at hand. What are you often asked to do for nothing? For free. Someone said, I'm a sound engineer. Calm down. Just calm down. But back to the topic at hand, what are you often asked to do for nothing, for free?

Someone said, I'm a sound engineer. I'll get a call to do a sound for an event for free because it's a simple event or for charity. And I'll say, oh, okay, so I still have to hire the equipment. And they say, there's no budget for it. Well, I can't be expected to go out of pocket. So now I'm donating. Yeah. Not only my time and my expertise,

but the money it costs for me to hire the sound equipment. So now I'm donating. Yeah. Not only my time and my expertise, but the money it costs for me to hire sound equipment. Rachel, what do people expect you to do for free? Morning. Morning. It's not me, it's my partner. He's a criminal defence lawyer. That's hot, actually.

That's really hot. We get lots of legal questions about areas of law that he doesn't specialise in. Like property law? Yeah. That's the thing, like somebody's got a property or a divorce question, a prenup question, he's like that's not my thing. Yeah. Yeah, heaps. So yeah, unless they're criminals, we won't help them.

And I dare not ask what your partner charges per hour as a criminal defense lawyer. But I imagine it's not a bottle charges per hour as a coffee fix lawyer. But I imagine it's not a bottle of wine. No, no, yeah. No. Lots of people are accepting everything for nothing. Wow, I bet they do.

Rachel, thanks for your call. Hannah, what do people expect you to do for free because of your work? Morning. I work at a freighting company and majority of the time it's, can you please track my parcel? What? Can you make sure it's delivered okay? And if there are any issues with it, I'm on like the investigation side of things.

So it's me having to figure out where their parcel is. So people are saying, hey, you work for this courier company. I'm waiting on an order from ASOS. Where is it? Yeah, and then I have to track it until it gets delivered, even though they have a tracking number. And it's all during work hours. And you can't do anything.

You can't do anything. The couriers are out there busting their guts. They are. Yeah, yeah. And that's the thing, though. When it comes to like my regular just dealing with regular customers um a lot of them have like account managers yeah and i always have to pull and that's the way i get rid of them i go you do have an account manager right they are paid

to do what yeah yeah i just tell people i change jobs i was having a nap yesterday and there was a, like, knock at the door. I was like, that's weird. But we've got tradies, so I thought one of them was trying to say something. And then I heard my youngest daughter being like, hey, how are you? Yeah, yeah, cheers, thanks, have a good day. I was like, I walked out, I was like, what was that? She's like, oh, it's just the courier. Oh, please.

Yeah, g'day, mate, how are you? Yeah, g'day. Yeah, cheers, mate. Have a good day. I'll sign for that. Yeah, I said, did you need a sign for that? She said, no, he just gave it to me. I was sign for that. Yeah, I said, did you need a sign for that? She said, no, he just gave it to me. I was like, okay.

Well, I guess thieves aren't often children. Play ZM's Fletchford and Hayley. Play ZM. Hayley's version. Oh! Songs sung with different lines. The first one for 2023. Yeah.

Yeah. Um, yeah. I thought it appropriate. I was a little confused around when I would write this because Jacinda announced that she was leaving and then there was a date, wasn't there, like Feb 7 or something like that, that she'd be leaving. Then all of a sudden Chris Hipkins was chosen as the leader and therefore the Prime Minister and it kind of happened yesterday.

It's got done. Yeah, she's still there. She'll be an MP. For Auckland. Until April. Yeah, until April. And then gone. Yeah, so it's time to say goodbye to her, I guess, as the Prime Minister.

She's done a lot. She's been there since 2017 was the year she was elected. Had a bit of a shit run, let's be honest, in terms of curveballs thrown. Yeah, the Christchurch shooting, that was at March 2019. Yeah, White Island and then the massive pandemic. She's really, for me, wherever you stand, I think we can say that she's done New Zealand a great service.

So this is my way of saying goodbye to her. Saying goodbye to Jacinda, our angel. Oh, my Lord, Robbie Williams. 2017 Just a young girl With a humble dream To be our queen with oh so many goals How could she know

I promised a tearjerker What the next six years would hold World destruction And a deadly cold So when New Zealanders said aye Out of all the ministers she's prime But better stick Winston by her side. Cause at least he is a guy.

And with that call, she won the general election. To a mostly positive reception. Maybe a protest or three. And she told us all Okay, everyone, let's do this And we all said, okay, miss But how will it impact me? And now she walks away from us

So we'll try love hipkins instead Next thing COVID's here And you locked us up Over two long years To keep us alive But we got fat and bored and didn't care if grandma died. Cindy, you really made your mark. You led with kindness from your heart.

And now we give you back to Clark. You did it all. Dodge questions about having babies. Questions only aimed at ladies. By ill-informed men. And after you popped one out, people thought that you were crazy. Going to the U. the UN with your baby Proven once again

You're a classy lady But I'm sure that Chris is a classy man Four bar instrumental. This is your time to cry. So get those lighters out. Whether you your time to cry. So get those lighters out. Whether you liked her or not. Either pick up your lighter and say

thank you. Or pick up a brick and throw it at her. Don't do that. Which you did, didn't you? Yeah, they did do that. You picked up her own pavement and you threw it at her. I'm managing through the tears. Don't cry.

Here it comes. Farewell, Jacinda. And through it all, she offered us protection from automatic weapons. She had them all recalled. Goodbye, our girl. We wish that you would just stay, but now you're free to be a DJ. When R&B calls, your tank is empty. So we'll love Hipkins instead.

Goodbye, Jacinda. Goodbye. Sorry we left you so empty. Yeah. We're really sorry. Hey, the rest of the world loved you. Dime. Dime.

They loved her. Great Hayley's version. I will send it straight to her. Honestly, wish her the best of luck in whatever she does next. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Aloha, I'm Jason Momoa. She looks at me like a hero.

And I love you. I love you too. Oh my God, we're there already. Well, he's in the country, Jess and Momoa, actor. Game of Thrones is where you first fell in love with him, Hayley. I know. Maybe you call that late to the party. But I just think he's obviously a stunning man, but just inside and out.

And I think we have a similar spirit. Right. And that is why you've obsessed over him for so long. I want him so bad. He came to the country before Christmas. Yes. And now he's back. Yeah.

And you've gone into overdrive. Yeah. It's quite interesting to watch, isn't it? So in the news last night, he was welcomed onto a marae. A marae. I could have been at that marae. Tim was there. Uncle Tim was there because he played his dad on Aquaman.

So he's got the connection. Cliff was there. Tim was there. Uncle Tim was there because he played his dad on Aquaman. So he's got the connection. Cliff was there. Cliff was there. Some other actors that are going to be in the Apple TV series they're working on. About King Kamehameha. The Hawaiian king that united the islands. I don't care. The Musket Wars of Hawaii.

I don't know why he's here. Sounds like a cool series. He's here. For those that don't know, you've actually got a pass card. I said to Aaron, in all earnestness, like, look, you know, we joke about celebrity passcards and stuff. I said, but if in ever my life, Jason Momoa wanted to make love to me. Wanted to make love with me, to me, on me.

Around me. In close proximity? Near me. I would want to do that. And he said, and I would allow it. Wow. Is it just something a partner says though? You know, like, ha, ha, ha.

Yeah, he probably thinks like, you can't get Momoa. But I got Aaron and that's New Zealand's Momoa. Yeah, right. Because Aaron is a tall, curly, dark man. And I love it. Well, we did mention this yesterday when First Sightings came through and somebody's been in touch. Nathan joins

us. Good morning Nathan. Oh god I thought it was going to be Jason joins us. No. Good morning. Good morning guys. How are we? Good. Now you knew of Hayley's obsession with Jason Momoa, Hollywood actor and you've actually seen him. Where was he? Yeah basically I know all about her obsession

because she talks about it just as much as her trip to Bali pretty much. Oh, Nathan! Banter, banter, banter, banter. Get it on the radio. But no, yeah, my partner and I, we were up on K Road last night and we were basically just at one of the main crossing intersections and lo and behold, Jason Lamar rocked up on his bike with his pal that he was riding with. And he proceeded to be heading to one of the bars on K Road.

And my partner didn't believe it at the time. So I said, come on, let's go for a walk up the road. And sure enough, he was standing outside. And he went in and ordered a drink. And lo and behold, we went in and had a a drink and there was only two tables in there and the only table that was left was probably less than a metre away from him. What did he smell like? What did he smell like? Did he smell like tobacco and leather?

Or sweat because he's been cycling? No, he's been on a motorcycle. he's not on a motorcycle, you dick. He's not on a cycle, he's on a motorcycle. I thought he was on a bicycle. No, no, no, he was on a bicycle, like peddling,

so he was. He was on a bicycle. Yes, because they've got great cycle lanes on K Road. They do, but I was imagining him on one of those big, big jobs. I was about to ask

if he was wearing a helmet, because he always rides his motorbike without a helmet, but of course in New Zealand that's ticketed as an offence. You. I was about to ask if he was wearing a helmet because he always rides his motorbike without a helmet. But of course, in New Zealand, that's ticketed as an offence. You simply couldn't. Okay, so he was peddling. Yes, so he was peddling. He did have a slight sweatshine on.

Yes, sweatshine. And he was in a sort of a sleeveless shirt and shorts. So everything was on display. God, listen to you. A sweatshine, sleeveless T-shirt. So, okay, so you sit behind him. What did he order for a drink? Did he have a pint?

No, he basically, I think he had a craft beer. So it was in a bottle. So he was recycling, so that was good to see. That's another connection on from Wellington. Capital of craft beers. Well, I'm from Wellington too, but it was good to see that he was having a craft beer. Yeah, yeah. But he was, yeah, from Wellington too, but it was good to see that he was having the craft, yeah? Yeah, yeah.

But he was, yeah, like I said, he was just talking to a couple of friends he was there with and no one sort of, you know, went up to him and hugged him and did all sorts of things to him. He was very polite and all that. And then once he left, two women were sitting outside and they just, you know, grabbed him and set a photo and he took about probably at least ten photos and then rode off into the distance Oh my god On his bicycle I was around

town yesterday That could have been you Amazing Nathan, thank you. You didn't answer my question Nathan, what did he smell like? If he had a sweatshirt, it would have been something in the air. Well, I could only probably describe it as probably the sex wax smell of a surfboard. Dr. Zoggs. Dr. Zoggs, sex wax.

Sex wax. That's it. Okay. Right. Oh, my God. You are a blessed man. You are a blessed man. Thank you very much, Nathan, for sharing that account.

And we do encourage anybody that has a run-in just to let Hayley know because she's basically stalking them. How am I missing him? How was your partner afterwards? Was she weak at the knees? Weak at the knees? Was she a bit aroused, if I may use the word? I think it was the Hollywood sheen rubbed off on her

because she was very talkative, more so than she normally is to me, and very holding of hands. So who knows? Okay. So this is beneficial for gents as well. If you ladies see Jason Momoa. Just being in his presence makes you better. Yeah.

He's a magic man. He really is. He's the wizard of my heart. Let's speculate here. If he's on a cycle on Kaya Road How far had he biked? Because Nathan said a sweat sheen Not sweaty So you're saying he couldn't be far from accommodation

I'm saying with an Can I say something? Because I know that he's in the country And he might be for some time And that a fun idea would be to do some kind of radio prank in which he would arrive and I wouldn't know. You know that sometimes I put in less effort than others. Today, I look cute.

Got a cute little mini skirt on, a little pink shirt. I'm out. It would have been a good day for him to be here. But don't do that when you're in trackies. Please, you can't do that. You have to let me know. But, okay, I agree. Do you know what I mean?

But these guys will get crabby if I tell you ahead of time. So maybe I will just message a W. No, don't tell her if that happens. What does W mean? I don't know. It just popped into my head. You message me a W and it means? If I message you just one single W... Gussy up. Gussy up.

Gussy up. Get dolled up, smell good, put in some effort. Okay. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day,

day, day, day, day. Yeah. Today's Fact of the Day is about the origins of the word panic. Because of Panic at the Disco. That's nice. The origins of the word panic. You played Panic at the Disco for Friday Flashback and I've got the origins of the word panic. They've just announced they've broken up this week.

You missed that news. Panic is named after the ancient Greek god Pan. Pan is the god of wild shepherds' flocks, rustic music, and impromptus. I was going to say

the god of shepherds' pie. Oh. Because of the pan. Do you go a shepherds' pie or a cottage pie? Shepherds' is lamb. Cottage is beef. Lamb's so go a shepherd's pie or a cottage pie? Shepherd's is lamb. Cottage is beef. Lamb's so expensive, guys.

Let's go mince and cheese. Lamb's a treat. No, not pies. Like, single pies. Like, big baked dish pies. With a mashed potato top. Yeah. We were having one over Christmas break, and Sade, the girls were away,

and Sade said to me What do you want on top Of the shepherd's pie Mashed potatoes or pom-poms I was like Pom-poms Yeah Her pom-pom pie

Looks so good Her pom-pom pie Is redonkulous But I was just Like such a little kid I'd be asking I'm a potato Mashed potato pom-poms

I don't know I'm only on pom-poms Please I can't put pom-poms baby I'm not just like Pom-poms I don't know Pom-poms Please So he's know, just like pom-poms on all my pom-poms. So he's the god of wild shepherds, flops, rustic music, impromptu performance.

Improv. So he's the improv god. All right, I need a household appliance. Yes, and hey, don't stop the flow. Keep it moving, keep it moving. So if you were to describe the look of Pan, he has the hindquarters, legs, and horns of a goat. So he looks like Mr. Tumnus from The Lion, the Witch

and the Wardrobe. Oh, hot. It's the same as a faun or a satire. You know, they were always the ones rocking around with little harps and stuff on ancient Greek vases. Yes. And they're like, drink the wine, have the sex. I'm a goat boy. So he's the god of that and the

reason panic is related to him is that he would peacefully move through the woods playing a pipe, calming the animals. But if he was awoken from a noontime nap, he would give a great shout, which would cause the animals to run in panic. Right. Wow. Yeah. So sudden fear. If everybody's all of a sudden like, if there's panic, sudden fear. Panikos.

Named after Pan. The god of the forest and the nymphs and the little bits. This is in the improv. Improv groups. A little bit of improv. Theater sports. So there's the origins of the word panic for today's fact of the day. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Let's go to the producer's booth, Shanalette Sheets at the social media desk. Shanalette Pyjamas. Yeah, we're trialling some new nicknames. Shannon. We tried Shanny. Shanny is new at the social media desk. Shanolette Pyjamas. Yeah, we're trialling some new nicknames. Shannon. We tried Shannie. Shannie is new at the... We tried Shanick, so that's taken.

Yeah. Isn't it? Can I use that one? Actually, legally asked. Back off. Yes, yes. So Shan-O-X. Shanolette Pyjamas at the social media desk.

You were telling us about your dad's 60th birthday, which had a theme, and the theme was... V at the energy drink. And he's in a theme, and the theme was? V at the energy drink. And he's in a band, and the band's name is? V6. Because there's six of them, and he loves? V. And V6 performed at said 60th, and he hired out a venue for the night.

It was at a pub, and we had to go to the Foodstuffs corporate office, and he asked for their merchandising V cutouts. What? Do you mean it was themed V? Everything. He's a fanatic. Yeah, so there was about three metre high cardboard cutouts of V and everyone had to sign it. I can show you.

How many Vs does he drink? He has two a day every day for the last 40 years. Is he all right? He said to the doctors, he goes, should I stop? So he stopped for a week. And then he went back to the doctors and they said, sir, you're sicker. Go back on the V's. And now he would never go off them.

Right. Maybe they're keeping him alive. I mean, he's 60 as well. He's kicking hard. He works a physical job and he loves it. All he needs is the guarana. It's not that he obviously likes the drink, but he

loves the brand. Yes. Has he ever tried a Reddy B? A Red Bull? He said the thought of it makes him want to throw up. He would never go near it. I can't remember the last time I had a V. Maybe I was a teenager? I don't know when I last had a V, but I can still tell you last time I had a V. Maybe when I was a teenager?

I don't know when I last had a V, but I can still tell you what it tastes like. If you think about the taste, there's a very distinct taste. I can understand how people collect Macca's Happy Meal toys. Yeah, but just V merch. But V merchandise, that's a bit weird. Does even the free beanies they give you every now and again? The V sunglasses that had the V on it? Air fresheners,

keychains. Bucket hats. What does a V air freshener smell like? V. What you would hope, yeah. Yeah, V. Sort of a zesty

poison. Wow. A very big man. A very big heart palpitation. Yeah, yeah. So no Monster Energy Drink for him, no mothers? No Mothers? No People love Monster

Monster is one of those ones You see people with Monster tattoos And you're like, cool But then I kind of get that Because they have an association with Motocross Motocross and like motorsports Yeah, true

And so there's that tie in there But like V Yeah Like he's just an absolute Brand fanatic for V And at the 60th The bartender came up to me I don't know if she realised I was his daughter And said, he's just an absolute brand fanatic for V. And at the 60th, the bartender came up to me. I don't know if she realised I was his daughter,

and said, he is so cool. I wish my dad was like that. And she goes, he's so hot. Oh, wow. We're probably going to need a photo of your dad. No, Tommy Shannon's got a hot dad. No, neither have I. It's bloody Friday.

She's been here since Monday. And let's just point this out now. She's got a hot dad. She's probably got a hot mum as well. Unbelievable. Yeah, I do. Oh, you've got a hot mum. She was been here since Monday. She's got a hot dad, she's got a hot mum as well. Unbelievable. She was Miss Legs Australia. She was Miss Legs Australia!

That is a big island of legs! I'm sorry, but Miss Legs Australia sounds problematic. Was it in Ralph magazine in the year 2000? This was back in the 90s. Oh right, yeah, okay. Oh wow. Miss Legs, we are probably going to need to see photos. I'll come through after this.

Respectfully. But can I have a perv at your dad? Respectfully. Let's have a gawk at you folks. We thought on the back of Shannon at the social media desk's dad being an absolute V brand loyalist fanatic. Yes. Is there a brand that you are absolutely fanatical about?

Or maybe your mum or dad are like, I love, you know, Ferrari. People get down on Ferrari. I was going to say Ford or Holden, but no. This shows the difference in our upbringing. Yeah, absolutely. But people do, they collect all the Ford merchandise. Oh, yeah. Ford and Holden people are crazy.

Car people are fanatic for their brands. You know another big brand, Coke. People do the Coca-Cola merchandise. Yeah, and they like collect the vintage stuff. The vintage stuff's cool. The signs. Yeah. Or Hello Kitty.

You know, if you like Hello Kitty, you've got the Hello Kitty outfits, the Hello Kitty wardrobe, the Hello Kitty beads spread. I've got my Hello Kitty school bag, my backpack. Absolutely. Yes. And it looks great. It looks cute. Yeah, coming bag, my backpack. Absolutely. Yes. And it looks great. It looks cute. Yeah, coming to work in that.

Yeah. So 0800-DIALS-IT-M, you can dob yourself in. Tell us about the brand that you're absolutely fanatic about or someone that you know. Like, what do they collect? Yeah, what do they... And it's a brand. It's got to be a brand, not just collecting pens or whatever.

Yeah, they're collecting vintage pens. It's got to be a brand. Like, what brand are whatever. Yeah, they're collecting vintage pens. It's got to be a brand. Like, what brand are they loyal to? Bonus points if you've got a tattoo. Yes. Yeah. You've marked yourself. Bonus points for a tattoo.

You've marked yourself. Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. Play ZM. Well, she joined the team on Monday, Shannon, at the social media desk. She's told us about her dad's 60th birthday, V-themed, the drink, the energy drink. Even she's just showed us pictures of a cake. A V-cake. Yep.

The band's named after the brand. So we want to know from you this morning if you're a brand loyalist, like you're just fascinated, obsessed. With one particular brand. Yeah. Frances, this is your dad? Yes, yes, this is my dad. He just recently bought a Ram Ute,

like one of those American... They're the big ones. ...Joy Rams. Massive, you know, like open the door and the step kind of comes out for you, that sort of stuff. Yeah, because it's like a metre from the ground. Yeah, yeah, pretty much.

So he is completely obsessed with it. And he kind of got his, we've got two, well, three grandchildren. Well, he's got four grandchildren and three boys. And those boys are so obsessed with the Rams. They've got like Ram shirts, Ram caps. You call yourself a Ram fan? You're a Ram fan. I'm a Ram fan.

Whoa, babe. Whoa, babe You call yourself a ram fan? You're a ram fan. Whoa, Blaine. She's a ram fan. My son even wakes up in the middle of the night and says, I want to go into Oprah's ute. You know, so it's so, yeah, they're all just so obsessed with it

now. It's crazy. When you're a little fella and your granddad's got something cool, you're always like, yeah, that is cool. It's crazy. When you're a little fella and your granddad's got something cool, you're always like, yeah, that is cool because my granddad's cool. Oh, plus Ram. Shannon, who's obsessed with the brand? Hey, guys.

I'm a truck driver and I am mad on Kenworth Trucks. Oh, of course you are. Yeah. Of course you are. What about Scania, though? Bloody sweets.

Yeah, they're pretty good. Yeah, they're pretty good. Yeah, bloody Scandinavian? What's wrong with you? I'm out of truck brands. How much are you obsessed with it? What's the level you go to? It's pretty crazy.

Well, I sort of grew up wanting to be a truck driver when I was sort of like five, six years old. And I managed to end up driving a Kenworth by the end of it, so I'm 29 now. Oh, hell. What are you going to do with the rest of your life? You've achieved your lifelong dream. You're 29.

It's all over now. I'm just going to retire. I'm just going to retire. Yeah, yeah, sweetheart. That's the life. Do you have pictures at home, like photos of your Kenworth and trucks? Of course he does. Yeah, I've got hats, bar mats, pins, models, all sorts.

Wow. Dude, truck drivers are nuts about their truck brands. They love them. Once they pick one, they can't turn their back on it. I didn't know that. Exactly, exactly. Have you got a big horn on it? Like a ooh?

Yeah, kind of. Yeah, yeah. Okay, good. Okay. More than a ha. More a ha than a hoo. Yeah. When you've heard a truck, you've got a big horn on it.

You're thinking of owls again. I'll give you a bit of a toot. Oh, you got it? Oh, yeah, okay. I'll give you a toot. See if you can hear it. Hang on. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that's good. That's good. Well, join us for the long weekend group toot next Friday. Yes, definitely. I'll ring up. Yes, please, Shannon. Okay, thank you, Shannon. Keep your texts coming in.

9696 0800 dials at M. The brands that you're absolutely loyal to or fanatic about. We're talking about the people obsessed with brands. Yeah. Like absolute brand fanatics. Alex, this is your mum. Yeah. What is she absolutely obsessed with?

So mum's absolutely obsessed with the brand Spate. Wow. Okay. She wouldn't be the usual demo, would she? No. No. So she loves, she has like a Spate, her boyfriend bought her like a big Spate swan dry for Christmas.

Did she love it? Sounds like he bought eight cases of Spate and he got a free swan dry, to be honest. She is obsessed with it She sticks like bait stickers around the house Like keeps the bottles I went to an antique store on the weekend And I found this big huge spate bottle cap So I bought it for her

And it's now hanging in the lounge. Oh my, she sounds like an 18 year old uni student. Yeah. I think she wishes she was an 18 year old. I wish she was. That's amazing, Alex. Thank you.

Some messages in. Somebody said, do people count? Because my auntie collects everything Elvis Presley. Cassie covers plates, bags, blankets, everything with Elvis Presley. He is a brand.

But then see, I can imagine that I can understand that more than say like, yeah, like's a brand He is a brand But then see I can imagine that I can understand that More than say like Yeah Yeah Like just a brand Like V or something

Somebody a massive fan Of Woodstock Oh yeah Has kept one of Each every time They change their bottles Or their cans They'll keep one of

The new designs Really Even covered a cabinet And bottle caps And then Resin'd over the top of it And had a Woodstock Street sign to go with it. Loves Woodstock.

Oh, my goodness. Loves the boobs. My friend and I used to live on Pepsi Max when we lived together, so obviously we've got matching Pepsi Max tattoos on our foot when we were in Bali. Wow. Someone said it gets pretty fanatical when builders decide what tool brand they're going to get behind.

Yeah. Whether or not it be, somebody said Makita was a big one. Yeah. Milwaukee. Yeah. I'm a Milwaukee guy. Somebody, a couple of stories about Orzito. Don't laugh at me, Jared.

I'd be a Milwaukee tradie. 100% I'd be a Milwaukee tradie. There's nothing wrong with Milwaukee. No, it's real cool. Yeah. Yeah. It's red. Yeah, it's red.

I like it because it's red. I went with DeWalt because it was yellow and I had a yellow road on Lorimer and it was going all the way to a yellow thing. Okay. My hard work. Somebody, a couple of stories on tools about Orzito. What's that? The budget brand you get from Bunnings.

Oh, yeah. Okay. The one-time. One-time Orzito. Oh, yeah. You know, you want a tool. You don't want to spend a fortune. You only need to use it once.

You buy Orzito. Yeah, right. Somebody said, I bought my boyfriend an Aussie dough tool for Christmas. He was so upset. He got very, very angry.

Apparently it's Makita or it's not happening. I didn't have the money for Makita. Well, it's a more expensive tool brand because it lasts

smaller once. Yeah. And somebody else said, we were bantering about how when you become a builder, you've got to pick your tool

and then show such brand alignment, you get the tattoo. And we made the apprentice get an Orzito tattoo. That is, okay, that's workplace bullying and harassment. You branded someone effectively. You branded them. Do you have, what tools are you using, Hayley, for the Renos? She's gone quiet.

You were right. She's just looking down. Oh, okay. Getting's gone quiet. You were right. She's just looking down. Oh, okay. Getting the quiet treatment. Have we done something to offend you? Is this because you love El Zeto? Is this the tension in the show that people have talked about? I don't know. Looks like we'll be having a meeting after the show, won't we? I want to get away.

You don't want to say anything before we end the show? She's gone completely quiet. She's actually left for the airport. She left five minutes ago. She left. We probably could have gone away. People wouldn't have noticed if we hadn't said anything. Yeah.

Well, we are dominating white males. We'll speak overall, Minch. She's back. Oh. Who did Tummy go to? Yeah, that was my tum-tums. That was my tum-tum-tums. Hey, guys, I reckon that was my tum tums That was my tum tum tums Hey guys I reckon

That was the most fun I've ever had on a show Ah Not for me Oh okay Nowhere even close Nowhere even close Nowhere even close

You haven't been here long Have you No I haven't No Well if you were listening And you had fun Why don't you give us A little review and a rating

ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley