ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 31st May 2022

Episode Date: May 30, 2022

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For a few years, in the 1970s, the Mr Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of play. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Then he just pulled out a gun, shot her in the back of the head, and then said to Wayne, you're going to help me bury her. This is Mr Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe, Barista May Coffee on the go. And we've got a bombshell. There's a bombshell in today's podcast. A bombshell. What an episode we have had.

Like, how can we say this without giving too much away? So we set up the whole show as if it's going to go one way. Yeah. And then suddenly, bombshell. Bombshell. Although it might have already been given away on social media. Yeah, it will be. You'll be listening to this being like, I know what it is.

You'll be like, I know, I know what it is, exactly. What a suspenseful trailer. But let's just say, without giving the bombshell away, Fletch is going to be a bit of a loner. I am, yeah. Fletch is in the studio on his own at the moment as I'm broadcasting from home. And of course, Vaughan, spoiler alert, has been in LA. Bombshell.

Bombshell. Bombshell. Upon arrival. Stay tuned. Thank you, Rachel. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

It's two minutes past six. Vaughan has touched down from LA. His flight has landed just, what, ten minutes ago. Will he get through customs? Watch this space. With 8,000 Star Wars lightsabers. They might think he's trying to sell them. Maybe.

You know if you have too much stuff, they think you're bringing it in to sell it. How embarrassing for him that he has to explain, no, no, they're all just for me. I'm a grown adult that likes toys. Yeah. So he is going to come straight into work. Oh, what a good boy. So eventually he'll be here. I'm guessing after seven

at some stage. He's just waiting for luggage at the moment. And then Claire Customs. How exciting. Should be nice. Coming up on the show, another chance for you to win free fuel this morning. 8 o'clock with our retro petrol time machine. We've been giving away hundreds.

Hundreds of dollars. Hundreds. Each time. All thanks to Gull. So listen out at 8 o'clock just before the news for The Activator. Next on the show, though. Well, look, you may have been reading some interesting facts about Texas laws. One in particular we're going to dive into. Yeah, this has been, I've seen this doing the rounds on social media after the horrible high school shooting. Yes, this has been, I've seen this during the rounds on social media after the horrible high school

shooting. Yes, of course. So a lot of people calling out the fact that there are not enough laws around gun ownership, but plenty of laws around a certain other ownership. Which is bizarre. Well, of course, the horrendous shootings in Texas.

Or just in America, full stop. In America, full stop, yeah. I've just found an article. This was dated four days ago, so it will be vastly out of date. 214 mass shootings in America as of four days ago. And there are a couple a day. So that will be out of date already.

Yeah, so if you compare that to the numbers in other countries around the world, it's absurd. It's absolutely absurd. It's horrendous and it, a horrible event to happen and people are, like, talking and talking about the fact that these Texas gun laws, they have to change.

These American gun laws, they have to change. And one way that people are highlighting the absurdity of these gun laws is by bringing to light the fact that there are other laws that have passed prohibiting the possession of other things. Like, isn't it wild? I think the first time I went to America, I was 20, and you couldn't go to a bar, you couldn't buy beer or wine

because you have to be 21. 21! You've got to be 21 to have a glass of rosé in the sun. But recently they weakened their gun laws so that you can carry, just walk around with, a firearm even if you haven't had any formal training on how to use it. And you could be 18.

You could be 18. There's no limit on the amount of, you know, amount of guns that you have. You don't have to do a background check. You don't need a permit. You don't need to be fingerprinted. You don't have to do training. No exams, no shooting proficiency test, nothing.

You can just shove it in your belt buckle and... Away you go. Away you go. But one thing that there is a law on, and I'm sure you would have seen this if you followed the news like we do, there is a law on, and I'm sure you would have seen this if you followed the news like we do, there is a law prohibiting the ownership of any more than six adult fun toy devices. So that is any device with the sole purpose of stimulating the fun parts of our bodies.

Of your bodies. Right. of stimulating the fun parts of our bodies. Of your bodies. Of our bodies. So you could have seven guns, semi-automatic weapons. You could have 20 even, 30, 40. And that would be legal. But you couldn't have 40 dildos. You can't even have seven dildos. Maximum six or you're in trouble.

Isn't that wild? So apparently it's like, according to section 43.23 of the Texas Penal Code, although it doesn't clearly state dildos, the law regulates the possession of, quote, obscene devices. Because, of course, like Texas in particular as well is a very conservative state. They would criminalize the use of gender-affirming drugs. Like, this is a state.

They're just all over the show. So, yeah, apparently it's something like, well, if you own more than six vibrators, then obviously you're going to sell them and be, you know, spreading your lewd and obscene lifestyle across a good Christian state. So that's something, that's a law that they need to have in place. Well, lucky you don't live in Texas then, isn't it? I thought you were going to say lucky you don't own more than six daughters.

I was like, don't presume anything about me. Carl Fletcher. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. This has gone viral and I can't find out what city or country it's in. I believe it's in

the United Kingdom. That's sad because somebody's, has somebody gone past this house and they've spied this list? And that's how it's gone viral? No, the woman, the woman who owns this house posted this to her

social media being like, I wrote all the rules and regulations for my helpers, she called them. Her staff, her personal staff that she has in the Instagram post called them her helpers rather than to-do lists. Oh, my God, this is crazy. So it's gone viral because she's got these absurd rules

for her helpers slash cleaners slash slaves, I would say. Yeah, so I think these are like, I imagine extreme wealth, even though she's written them on, honestly, the tackiest, cheapest looking pink whiteboard. Yeah. But I will withhold judgment.

She's clearly got like a full staff in her house. Cause I think they even look after her kids. If you were so filthy rich, would you like have a whole lot of staff? That would be weird, right? Like, just do it yourself. Yeah, no, no, no. I wouldn't want people around all the time.

If I was super rich, I would probably have a house cleaner. And that would be it. Right. You couldn't do it yourself. Even then, like, Aaron is such a good cleaner. So I've already got a house cleaner. Do you think he'd be like, oh, come on, we're worth $100 million, we should get

a cleaner? Yeah, but nobody does it like you do. It would be my argument. So these are rules that have gone viral from her video. No using of phone during work hours unless we call you. Do not go out of the house without permission.

Do not talk to strangers. Only use the phone when kids are asleep. One hour usage. Do not lock your room. Do not waste electricity or water. Only stay in the area with a camera when you are not home unless bathing or doing housework. My favourite one is bathe after you cook, finish housework and before you sleep twice

a day. Twice a day. What's it to you, woman? How often I... Oh, yeah. Someone needs to check if they're okay. These people, these cleaners. Oh, so she's got all the tasks that she wants for them.

Mop floor, vacuum floor. Well, she's got that back to front. You vacuum, then you mop. Dum-dum. Change bed sheets. What does it matter then if they bathe twice a day? Wash two toilets. Clean kitchen.

Clean the fridge. So these are just cleaners that she's got these rules for. Don't lock your room. Don't talk to strangers. And then so the woman who owns this house that employs these slaves, she posted this online. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like quite

happily. And like made some kind of joke like, can I add this rule or something? Oh my god, get a grip. She also sets them a bedtime. They're going to be asleep by 10pm and up by 7. Guys, get out. Get out of there.

Someone needs to save these poor people. Yeah. From this rich, rich lady. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley Silly little po Silly little po

It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Well, our silly little pole. Do you regularly, regularly talk? Regularly. I know. Anything that ends with an A-R-L-Y I'm always like, do you say particularly or particularly? Just say it

fast and quick and nobody notices. Do you regularly talk to an ex? An ex-partner, we asked. Upon reflection, I mean I don't have a lot of exes to be fair. No. I just met Aaron.

I was a virgin, and I met Aaron, and now we're together forever. Yeah. So this doesn't apply to you. Doesn't apply to me. 84% of people, nah. They're in the past. Oh, that's higher than I thought it would be, because I guess there's a few type of exes, right?

There are the exes you may have children with that you have to talk to by law because you're organising kids pick up and swapping kids and stuff and weekends or there could be like very long term exes where you amicably split and you're still

friends. I actually agree. I thought this is higher than I imagined. So only 16% of people say that they still talk to their exes. I have maybe one ex that I'm still very good friends with. Yeah. And then some more casual people that I maybe still encounter. But other than that, no. Yeah. And then some more casual people that I maybe still encounter. But other than that, no.

Yeah. Do you know what we should ask next time is, do you have an ex or someone on the back burner? Yeah. You know, like just simmering away there in case you need a new boyfriend or girlfriend. Yeah, every now and then on a lonely Friday night, you're like, oh, that's familiar. That's familiar and convenient.

What are you doing? Some messages in. Taylor said, 100%, I still talk to her. She was my first girlfriend. I've now since come out as gay. We're still best friends and talk to each other about everything. Yeah, but there's no, like, a new partner's

not going to be intimidated by that, though, are they? They're not going to be threatened. Yeah, absolutely. Lindsay says, yes, I do because I have two children with my ex-husband, so we talk every day. Luckily, we still get on well and always put the kids first. So as you said, I think there'll be a lot of cases where that has to happen. Jessie said it took a few years, but yes, we do talk and we're now friends.

You've got to let the dust settle. Yeah. You've got to let the dust settle. Yeah. You've got to let the tears dry. Laura said, we still live together. Mortgage? Or just, like, too hard to move out? Do you know, this was the case for one of my good friends. They broke up.

They had children. Yeah. They split and then they were just like, you know, everything's so expensive at the moment. Like, you just move in there. And, you know, for the kids, it'll still be great because we'll still all be together as a family. Yeah. And it was all, like, hunky-dory until, you know.

Someone got a new partner? Yeah, you start having little Tinder dates and whatnot. Yeah. It's a little bit more awkward, I'm sure. But, hey, look, cost of living, you might as well. Yeah. Caroline says, I talk to my ex almost daily. He's one of my best friends and my daughter's godfather.

Interesting. Okay. He is an ex for a reason. We were always better as friends. My husband and him get along as well, too. Oh, that's good. Jeepers. Everybody's happy.

Melissa says, oh, see, there's all nice. These are mostly from people who do talk to their ex. He was my best friend before our relationship, but it didn't work, and he's still my best friend now. Both happily married to other people, and we all get along well. Hayley messaged in saying, he was my first boyfriend, but him and his wife are mine and my hubby's closest friends now. He was even a groomsman at our wedding.

Oh, wow. See, that's cool, but some people wouldn't handle that, eh? Yeah, I think it's maybe some jealousy or... Yeah. Yeah, picturing the previous relationship. Oh, gosh. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, TikTok's gone viral.

A woman in the UK, she's shared her travel tips, and I saw this. A news site republished it, and it was like, how to get cheap flights. And I was like, tell me more. And I click on it, and it's just using Google Flights. And I'm like, does everyone

not know about Google Flights? And apparently they don't. Apparently they don't, because they don't because when I, oh my God, that's so sad to say, when I used to travel. Pre-pandemic. Yes, and I'm one of the, I've just always been lucky. I've always managed to sort of

have these wonderful trips. I used to use Skyscanner, which was like, you'd put in where you wanted to go and then it would search every you know, airline website, every travel website and try to find you the best deal.

And then that was sort of the hot one, Skyscanner for ages. And then I know the pilot was another one. But they were sort of a little bit messy and all over the show and also, you know, lean towards airlines that they worked with. But then, Google Flights. Google Flights came about. And I was like, oh my god, game changer, lean towards airlines that they worked with. But then Google Flights. Google Flights came about.

Google Flights is amazing. Game changer. So for those that don't know, just Google, go to Google and Google, Google Flights NZ, and it'll take you there. And then you put in where you want to go with your dates, and then it will search everything because it's Google. Because it's Google, it's got no bias. Yeah.

And, I mean, I will say, though, some of the flights it gives you are on, like, I don't want to say dodgy websites, but, you know, there's, like, it'll give you the main websites, like the airline websites and Expedia and stuff. But then there are ones, like, I don't think I would personally book a flight on some of these websites. I have done it once before where I was like, oh, my God, well, that's the cheapest. And it's the same flight as this, you know, so I'll save 200 bucks. And then something goes wrong with the flight and you can't get hold of the place where you book the ticket.

Yeah, it's a nightmare. And they have bad reviews online in a lot of those places. But for those that don't know, so, for example, if you wanted to go to Australia, you open up Google Flights, you type in like Auckland or wherever you want to go. You can choose like, say for example, you can put in the exact city

like Sydney or Melbourne or Brisbane or you could just put in Australia and then on the map, it'll show you all of the flights for the dates that you want. You were saying before, like say if you were lucky enough to be heading to Europe

and sometimes if you were saying before, like, say if you were lucky enough to be heading to Europe, and sometimes if you were doing a Europe trip, sometimes it might be cheaper to fly into one city than it is to the other. And you might as well just start in that location because it's so much cheaper. Well, yeah, if you typed in Europe, it'll give you all the, for the dates you want to go, it'll give you all the flights for all the major cities on a map. And then you can just click that one. It's pretty insane. Isn't it exciting talking about travelling again?

Even when you put in the dates, it'll give you, like, how much on that date it will cost you, so you can kind of choose a date. If you're flexible, if you go a day or two earlier or later, you could save quite a bit as well. But, yeah, it's the most amazing, like, tool for booking flights. Oh, my God. By the way, hashtag not sponsored.

Hashtag not sponsored. Hashtag not sponsored. Hashtag not sponsored. Just passionate. Also, one thing, and I mean, it is a good thing, but it's also like, oh, there it is. It also tells you sort of where the emissions are sitting per trip. Oh, yeah. I ignore that.

Do you? Yeah. Apparently, the whole world does. Apparently, we're ignoring it till we burst into flames the whole world does. Apparently we're ignoring it till we burst into flames. But it does, it tells you like what route would be lower emissions based on the plane, the size of the plane, the route that you're taking.

I love that when we said, oh, let's do an example trip and try to seem relatable to our audience. And you were like, I'll do Australia. I've locked up Auckland to Las Vegas. It's like $3,000 for a round trip if I was to leave in two weeks' time, Wednesday, not next week, but the week after.

That's nuts. I'm leaving New Zealand at 6 a.m. in the morning, seems to be the only flight. Getting to Vegas at 12.10 in the afternoon, which will be quite a good time to arrive in Vegas, it is going to take me 27 hours and 42 minutes though. Yeah, well, that's the thing. The cheapest flight might not be the most direct.

But I looked up in Australia and Sydney in mid-August, a return $420. $420, that's pretty good. Wow, that is good. Yeah, but that's another thing experts are saying as well. Don't mess around. If you're wanting to go somewhere, even like end of the year, book ASAP. Because like...

Now I'm just dreaming. Fuel's getting expensive and everything is. It is. I just put an Auckland to Europe in a couple of weeks time. And then it brings up a map and it tells you all the cities and how much it would cost to fly into the cities. So if I wanted to go to Europe, if I was going to fly to London, it's going to cost me almost $500 more than if I flew into Rome,

which is going to cost me $200 more than if I flew into Spain. Like, it... Oh, Spain, sorted. Problem solved. Go to Spain. Moscow's cheap. Well, yeah, but that's cheap for a reason. Rovaniemi is very expensive, so I'm going to fly into

Madrid, I reckon. If only you didn't have work, a thing called work. I'm taking leave. I feel COVID coming on. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. It's Adele, easy on me. ZM, Fletch Vaughan and Hayley Vaughan's landed and dropping stuff at home

and will be joining us soon. Busy couple of days. He did retrieve his backpack. How do you just walk off a flight and not grab your stuff? He left everything. Yeah, I know, I know. Well, he's been in LA Star Wars at Disneyland celebrating Star Wars

and you can experience the six-part streaming event No, well, he's been in LA Star Wars at Disneyland celebrating Star Wars, and you can experience the six-part streaming event Obi-Wan Kenobi. It's streaming on Disney Plus now. Reviews of Obi-Wan were... Oh, amazing. How was it? Oh, that's the reviews I've heard so far. Yeah, like they can't get the words out.

They're just in a war. So you've got to watch it, I guess. Anyway, moving on to a post-pandemic article I've found, because good news, you heard it here first. Breaking news on ZM, the pandemic's over. But apparently post-pandemic, people are, I suppose it's more like post-restriction pandemic. Yeah.

People are desperate, desperate, they're using, to get into a relationship. And I guess I just hadn't really thought about this, but, like, two, three years is a long time. Yeah. Although, is this article from New Zealand? Because I feel like we didn't have it as bad as other countries. No, this is from America.

Yeah, like there were people that were hiding away for two years. Absolutely. Whereas we had those massive periods of freedom, didn't we? Where we could resume back to normal dating life. I mean, I don't know if you remember, but for a while we eliminated COVID. We did. No big deal.

As a country, 25 million. But no, this is from America. But they're saying that this is from Bumble. They did a study. Right. That found that 46% of the users, single users. As opposed to what other users on Bumble? I don't know. Couples?

They are looking to reset their dating lives with one in three users of the app saying that the pandemic has drastically changed what they are looking for on the app. So basically it's changed from I'm open to anything casual, long term, like happy to see how it develops. Now people are like, baby, I've lost a lot of time. I'm looking for someone to have a baby with me, someone to be in a serious relationship with me, someone to marry me eventually. Because they've just lost a lot of time. And I will say some of this,

some of the data they collected, is from women who are like, look, I'm in my 30s. I've now lost three years. So that's three years of, you know, and if they want to have a baby, there's sometimes more pressure that you get on your biological clock, unfortunately.

And if that's something that is really important to them, they've lost three years of being able to connect with people to a deep enough level that they can make a baby. Make a sweet baby. Yeah. Okay. Apparently, even they asked a lot of people, like how they, a lot of women,

how they were combating this. And while some of them are like, well, they're just being more forward now. Yep. And like going. Well, you cut out the. They're not so much to prudate me. But they're like, this is what I want.

They're being more open from the start. This is what I want. Yeah, right. Some of them going so far as saying the pandemic has caused them to freeze their eggs because they're basically putting that all on ice. Is it a giant red flag, though, the first conversation you're having with someone on Bumble or Tinder is, I want to have a baby?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. After dinner going, like, I just want to pop past the freezer place and pick up my eggs. They're all there. Yeah. But anyway, apparently people are just like, it's time. Because all they've been able to do, and like you say, in countries that were more locked down than us or sort of.

Or it was everywhere. It was everywhere. You wouldn't go on dates then, would you? They have not been dating. Remember, they've been having Zoom dates. Yeah. They've been masked. So no, you know, no chances of a lovely organic pash

that eventually, pashing, as we all know, leads to pregnancy. So no chances of that. No chance. They've just been having absolute meh. All right, a couple of minutes away from seven. I think this should be a new segment, the Queen's Tea. We just dive into the weird inner workings of the Queen's life. Because she loves her gin.

She loves her gins, doesn't she? That's another. Yeah, she loves gin. She's just nuts. Isn't she buying a pub at the moment? Her very first pub? And she's back out now. She's walking around. She's not as, you know, she obviously had a bit of a health scare the last few months,

but she's back out there. She looks bloody good too. I sort of imagine, you know, remember when Prince Philip sort of took a turn and then he came out into public and everyone was like, shit. Like he looks like he's been embalmed and someone's controlling him with a remote control. The last 10 years he's been embalmed. He did look. Someone's controlling him with a remote control. Yeah, the last 10 years he did look embalmed. He did.

So apparently people have noticed and kind of caught this on camera and gone, this is a signal that the Queen uses. Because obviously, like, she's about poise and manners and politeness. And she would have to converse with a lot of strangers, a lot of boring strangers. And they probably all ask the same questions. Yeah. What's it like being the queen?

I think that would be my only question I could come up with. And she'd be like, great, haven't heard this one before. Oh, man, must be so cool being the queen. So apparently people have noticed this one trick she does, and it is her signal for get me out of this boring conversation. Really? So, like, I've got

this with Aaron, which is like I turn to him and I just widen my eyes ever so slightly. Oh, but that's very obvious. That's an obvious, but surely you could give him just a look without doing the eyes. No, he's a simple boy. You have to be a little bit more overt with it.

Because I feel like all couples have this, right? Or all friend groups and couples. You just need to look at someone and give them the look. But it doesn't always go well. I feel like my mum's going to be mad. Oh, no, great, my mum's in Paris. Yeah, suck it, she can't hear this.

Okay. So my mum did this once to my dad at a dinner party. And my mum was trying to signal my dad because my dad was about to put his foot in it. Yep. And my dad was like kind of spilling off about something that someone at the dinner table wasn't supposed to know. So he was going, yeah, yeah, da-da-da-da. And my mum sort of gently tapped him under the table as in like, Craig, shush. And then my dad just out loud goes, don't kick me.

Okay. Everyone knows if you get a tap and kick under the table, it's stop talking. Well, not my dad. Anyway, the Queen's is very subtle. Well, what's her signal? You won't even notice it. So say she's talking to you. Yeah.

Talking, talking, talking. And she's got her little purse in the front. And she sort of clasps it in front of her, hands in front. Yeah. When she pulls her hands behind her back, holding her handbag behind her back, and switches the bag from the right hand to the left, apparently that means I'm done with this now. And then whoever's with her kind of cuts in and

says oh let's keep keep walking yeah so like her people she'll be surrounded by people all the time her people not see this gesture and go uh i'm ready to leave that's amazing but now that it's out of the bag or out of the handbag so to speak people are gonna know people are gonna know imagine talking to the queen and seeing it and being like, oh, no. Oh, she thinks my conversation is boring. I just got handbagged. And you're talking to the queen.

What's it like being the queen? She's straight away handbagged behind. Yeah. I've heard this before. Yeah, yeah. So that's the polite one, as in like, come on now. I'm quite ready to go. Apparently, if she twists her wedding ring on her finger,

that means immediately, get me out of here. Wow, okay. So if you see any of that, you've got rubbish chat. You've got no game with the Queen. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Producer Jared has an issue. Is this with one of the flatmates or?

Potentially one or both. I'm not actually sure which person I'm taking umbrage with. Right. Oh, no. But recently when I've been arriving home. Is someone drinking your Red Bulls? No, they wouldn't dare. They wouldn't dare.

No, he would flip a table. Yeah, so I've been getting home, opening the door Red Bulls. No, they wouldn't dare. They wouldn't dare. No, he would flip a table. Yeah, so I've been getting home, opening the door, and just being assailed with this wafting smell. And it took me like a couple of days to realise where it was coming from. And we've got this little brown contraption that spits like steam out. Well, like a vaporizer. Yeah. What do you call them?

It's like, it's not as cool as my vaporizer, but it's like a central... A diffuser, that's the one. Like an oil diffuser. Yeah, that's the one. Okay. And it's just like steaming out into the dining room, which is like the hub of the house.

So there's just this wafty point. How would you describe the smell? Yeah, what is it? Is it sort of a dense musky or a citrusy or vanilla-y? I'd say dense, musky, kind of warm. What are those sticks? Incense sticks. I can't stand those.

I'm obsessed with those. See, that's for the same reason. Musky. Musty. Yuck. I like more of a fly. Do a yuck. Musky, musty. I like more of a, like, do a nice candle. Do an akoya. I'm literally sitting here in my house with a beautiful burning akoya right now.

Yeah, see, that's the way to go. You don't want a musty, musky diffuser. So the Flamates has decided that this is in the main kitchen now, the main living room. Yeah, so basically like the hub of the home, you know? Yeah. And so, yeah, I've just been turning it off. Oh, that's so pass-ag.

Yeah, that is really pass-ag. I'll just walk past, click. Do they turn it back on? They haven't noticed I'm doing it yet because they set it for like a six hour timer I think. And then I just click, click, click until it goes to zero. Could you sort of

do a rebuttal and put your own scent of choice in the room? Like some Lynx Africa. Yeah, Lynx Africa, that's a winner. Spritz of Lynx Africa or the smell of a nice chilli con carne maybe. Yeah, that could work.

Because, like, I don't mind smells, certain smells, obviously. Like, if it was, like, a nice minty little jasmine. Like a minty biscuit. Yeah. I don't know if you can get a minty biscuit to fuse a smell. If they could have a mint slice. Chocolate mint slice. Oh, my God.

No, I had a mint chocolate candle once. What? And it was the best smell. I know. Yum. You would have died. It was so good and I burnt it right to the bottom until it like literally went out.

Oh, R.I.P. Mint slice candle. Do you know what your scent would be, Jared? Is every morning when we come into studio and you enter the room, I always feel like I'm suddenly 21 years old on Courtney Place again because you always bring in a Red Bull

and that smell is as offensive as the smell of musky oil diffuser. Yeah, have you thought that maybe your flatmate is trying to overpower your smell of Red Bull and energy drinks and gaming and D&D?

You're making me sound like a real silly dude. Like you don't shower. I shower daily. And I don't really crack the Red Bulls at home, to be fair. I'm more of a, I see water. You save them for us. God, this is when you live with so many people, I'm like, what are you going to do?

You need to have a meeting. Maybe you could just keep Passag turning it off. I think you need to call a little Hekoi and have a big meeting about this as a meeting. Maybe you could just keep Passag turning it off. I think you need to call a little hekoi and have a big meeting about this as a flat. It's not on. Communal spaces. What if you take the Passag to a next level, unplug it and just put it in their room?

Oh yeah, but then you're still going to get a wharf from their room. I think the issue is the smell. Just say you want a nicer smell. Something we could all agree on. Should we get you an Akoya candle? And then you can make that, you can offer that as the alternative. I would love an Akoya candle.

Okay, Hayley, we'll bring you one in. I'll bring you one in. Thank you. You're not getting one of mine. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. So this is from a really interesting website called Get the Guy. Howtogettheguy.com. What is it?

It's like... Well, it's been flagged by IT as... I mean, you're on your home Wi-Fi, but I can't open the article at work. Are you serious? Oh, no, it's not that saucy. It's like a dating website, I think, or like a relationship kind of. Well, they block everything here. You can't even buy some stuff online.

Oh, I know. I was trying to watch a very innocent video on my favorite website the other day at work, and it wouldn't hit me. What's your favorite website? I'll send it to you. I'll send it to you in the group chat. Okay. Anyway, so this, they basically, they took to their social media platform and asked a

question. They asked specifically men only about their insecurities when it comes to the early stages of dating. Anytime we do one of these things about dating, it just reminds me how awful it was. And how lucky you feel to be in a long-term relationship. Yeah, I mean, let's be honest. Sometimes it's absolutely boring as all hell, but it is awesome.

Is your fiancé awake outside the door right now at home, or is he? I literally think he's right there. I love you, but God, we are just stagnant, I tell you what. Anyway, it's about what. Anyway, anyway, it's about those early stages of dating which honestly, when I say those words, it makes me feel ill. So they asked men about their insecurities and the list, the

responses they shared are somewhat heartbreaking. Yeah, like quite vulnerable because guys don't really open up and talk about these things, do they? No, exactly. So they got so many responses, they made another video about it. But I'm just going to read you some of the responses, some of the insecurities that men have in the early stages of dating.

So this would be interesting. If you're going on a date or messaging a guy, they could be feeling all of these things. Yes. While you at the same time could be freaking out as well about all kinds of things. That's the thing with dating, eh? Like, just say how you feel. Anyway, so these are the insecurities verbatim.

Is she even into me? How do I compare to the competition? You know, like when they're on those dating apps. Where do I sort of measure up? And how do I compare to her previous boyfriends? I don't know if that's just physically or all around. Will she be able to understand the emotional side of me

or the side of me that people don't usually see? Am I good enough? Am I interesting enough? What are her financial expectations? Can I provide for them? Am I man enough? Oh my god, the man enough. Yeah.

It's terrible. What is that? What even is that? What are their past relationships? Am I going to get friend zoned? Am I too boring? Will I get found out? I don't know what that one says. What does that mean?

Like, have they buried a body somewhere? Yeah, if you've got a body in your backyard, maybe don't move in together and then suggest you do a big home extension at the back. Yeah, she's like, I feel like we could do a new deck and a pool out the back. He's like, no. I think we should get a pool. No.

We should dig a nice big pool here. No. I don't want a pool. I'm allergic to chlorine. Even everything up to third date ideas, first date drink ideas, second date, movie, third date, what are we doing? Oh, it's just there's so many. Texting anxiety, what language do I use?

Is she going to share things about me with her friends? Am I too dramatic? And will she eventually become less interested in me the more I tell her about myself? I mean, just to put your mind at ease with the, is she going to share this with her friends thing? Absolutely, yes. 100%

All of them. Yeah. This is only one thing because, I mean, I do think if we're talking in a heterosexual, on heterosexual terms, men of my life have always been like, oh, do you share everything with your friends? And I'm like, yeah, literally

everything. And they're like, don't you? And they're like, no, it's our private life. Yeah, whereas guys don't as much. No, no, for me, you have to. You absolutely have to. Anyway, the end of this article, they basically say, like, the only way you can get through these insecurities

is by being mutually assured. So basically knowing that the person on the other side is having all of these feelings as well. Yeah, because do you think women would, would they think men are thinking those kind of things as well? No, because I guess, I mean, sometimes, but sometimes I feel like insecurities in men

can often play off as like, they then up the kind of arrogance a little bit. Yeah, right. Or like the show or the, you know, macho, macho thing. Yeah. So we're just, we're all as insecure as each other. We're all just two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl, you know? Waiting for those.

For a real topical Pink Floyd quote. Waiting for those human fingers to sprinkle some food into the bowl. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Did you stop the song? Waiting for those human fingers to sprinkle some food into the bowl. Did you stop the song? Did you stop the song? When I said to Jared, can you please pause the song so we can talk at the end of it, you pressed stop. Wow. I would say us broadcasting from different locations

is going absolutely flawlessly. Hey, just asking for a friend. Time for just asking for a friend. It's where you submit your questions. You're just asking for a friend. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not with myself. I mean, obviously not asking for yourself.

No, of course not. No, and we have received one that originally I was like, and now I'm like, hang on. So this comes to us from an anonymous gentleman. Hey team, I have a six-figure finance job. I mean, out the gate, well done to you. Congratulations for you. Happy for you.

Enjoy your blocks of cheese. I was just going to say you can afford $22 blocks of cheese. I have a six-figure finance job and often get invited to networking events. Ooh la la, I love those things. That sounds horrible. I know. Oh my God, we hate events with free nibbles and wine. They are mostly black tie.

And my wife and I used to love getting dressed up and having big nights out together. Recently, however, we've been butting heads as she doesn't seem to want to put in any effort anymore. She genuinely asked me last week if it would be okay to wear leggings to an awards dinner. I obviously want her to be comfortable because I love her, but I do need us to look and behave in a certain way for my career. Asking for a friend, is it okay to ask my wife to take a little bit more pride in her appearance in these instances? I mean, good luck wording that in any way that doesn't sound like...

Straight out the gate. Let's just say, let the term, can you take more pride in your appearance? We're going to get rid of that one. No, we can't say that. In the same token, okay. Disclaimer, I'm a feminist. That aside, let me preface this with any other thing,

but putting that aside, leggings to an awards dinner, I understand how that might be a problem for our anonymous. Yeah, as someone that would love to wear comfy track pants to an awards ceremony, I can absolutely relate to that. Anytime you have to go to a formal occasion, you're like, ugh.

This is why I don't own shirts. I own like one shirt. And I probably don't fit it at the moment. Or maybe I own two shirts because one's white and one's blue. And then, oh God, I just yeah. And that's why I can say I can't go because I don't have any shirts that fit. Well, earlier in the year

you of course went Chino shopping because you had a wedding to attend and it was an absolute mare and like the whole time you're having a full meltdown in the changing rooms, sending messages being like, what about what about these do these look stupid what do these look like i don't know i hate formal events i just i can't do them so i just if i was here i wouldn't go so yeah it's a bit of a sticky situation because obviously like your wife's appearance and what she wears and stuff has absolutely nothing to do with you. But if you are going to these events...

But how do you say that? What words do you say without it being very offensive? I would literally... If Aaron said to me, can I wear leggings to the New Zealand TV Awards? Yeah. Where, I don't know if listeners know, and, I mean, you don't like to talk about this,

but you won the Best Host Award. I don't like to talk about it. But, I mean Best Host Award. I don't like to talk about it. But I mean, unfortunately, it ended up being on Zoom because of COVID. But had it have been an event, and Aaron had said to me, I want to wear my comfy house leggings. You would have been like, no way. I would have just said like, no, it's a formal event,

so we need to dress up. And I would have helped him find an outfit. Right. But this is shoe on the other foot, because that's a very typical role isn't it? The woman kind of dressing up her man but the man asking the woman to sort of you know, come on, gussy up a bit and slap her face

on. Yeah. I don't know. It's landmines everywhere isn't it? So this is asking for a friend. We need your help. What do you think about this situation? What could he say to her that isn't going to be taken badly? It isn't

going to have him out on the street. So remember the ultimate question is, is it okay to ask my wife to take more pride in her appearance? Alright. 0800 DALS at MSN number. Give us a call. You can text as well. 9696. Maybe you've been in this situation where you had to ask

one of your partner to, I don't know, maybe dress up. Regardless of gender or whatever your role is in your relationship, just, yeah, how can this person navigate this situation? Or have you been in a similar situation yourself? Yeah, maybe you've got a good wording,

a good sentence that he could use that wouldn't... An elegant sentence. Yeah. A good sentence that he could use. An elegant sentence. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Hey, just asking for a friend. Wow, we have had such a response to this. Such a huge response. The text machine is blowing up.

Now, this asking for a friend, someone's obviously not asking for themselves. Oh, absolutely not. Absolutely not. So our anonymous asker today, you know, they said, I've got a six-figure finance job, often get invited to networking events.

They're usually black tie. My wife and I used to love getting dressed up for these, but now she no longer wants to make the effort. Even suggested wearing leggings to an award dinner last week. Am I okay to ask my wife to take more pride in her appearance? Do Lululemon do formal leggings? I don't believe they do a formal legging.

I think a Lululemon is appropriate at any given moment, but that's just me. That's just you. Wow, so many messages. Like we asked, like how should he word that sentence better? How could he word that sentence better? Have you been in a similar situation to this? We'll take some calls first.

Vicky, what do you think? You definitely don't want to use the phrase take pride in your appearance. Yeah, I think we're all clear on that one. That's not going to work. How would you rephrase it, Vicky? You just want to explain. She knows the kind of event it is, so just

tell her that you want her to dress up and look and feel as beautiful as she is. Oh, yeah, that's good. That's bloody good. That's good. You're good with words, Vicky. Thank you. Good with feelings. Yeah, that's a good way of putting it, because I think if you say to someone, it's formal, and reiterate

that, they'll understand leggings is never formal. And then you back it up with a compliment. Yeah, that's good. You're good, Vicky. I want you to look and feel as beautiful as you are. Are you in management, Vicky? That's a very management thing to do. I'm not, but I should be.

Yeah. Vicky, thanks for your call. Nikki, what do you think? what's the situation on this it's it's a hard one because I had my boyfriend say something and two years later I really appreciate it so like I was at my boyfriend's flat um at the time and his flatmate was always dolled up like nails, hair, dress, can, everything and I was always like tree pants or yoga pants or whatever and

I mentioned jokingly oh would you wish I dressed up a little bit more, put a bit more effort in and he was like yep. Was he wanting to be in the dog box? I don't know. Afterwards, he tried to save it by saying, you know,

like, I know you always feel more confident and more pretty when you dress up, and I can see it in your body language, and I think it would help you and your mental health a little bit more as well. Oh, wow. And how did you take that at first? Were you like, what? Yeah.

Definitely threw me, but two years on I definitely still make an effort. I mean we love to give a foot back to track pants but when we go out I do try to make an effort to dress up a bit more. Wow and you do feel better for it? 100%. Yeah. Wow.

Well maybe I should dress up a bit more. Fletch honestly every time you do. But I love track pants. You do. Amazing. Nikki thanks for your call. We've got so many messages in. It's unbelievable.

Like so many. The very first message that came through is in support of the leggings. She said she's a trendsetter. Everyone should be able to go to these events in leggings. Might as well just do it and everyone will be happier. I don't even think after the pandemic as a society we're good with leggings

at a formal event. And I'd be all for leggings and comfy pants at formal events, but we're not there. Of course. I don't think we're quite there. Another message in says she is telling him, sort of subliminally, that she isn't even keen to go. He needs to give her an out. So maybe she's going, you know, like that's her way of saying,

please don't make me go to these stupid things anymore. A lot of people are saying, please do not tell her to take more pride in her appearance. I think they're taking umbrage with the wording of that. Yeah, yeah. A lot of suggestions, a lot of messages in saying like, hey, Mr. Six Figures, buy her something nice to wear. Yeah, yeah. A lot of suggestions, a lot of messages in saying like, hey, Mr. Six Figures, buy her something nice to wear. Oh, yeah.

But then is that also insulting as well? You'd find a way to be insulted at that, right? Well, some people are saying like make it a little bit fun, like buy her something really sexy to wear and, you know, to make her feel really good about herself. Some people messaging in saying like maybe she's going through menopause. We don't know and you know she doesn't want to be getting into these formal

kind of outfits like that. Yeah, right. Another message, give her some money and send her on a shopping trip to get a nice outfit. So instead of buying it for her, just being like, I mean it's a little bit go buy yourself something pretty. Yeah, it is. That's fine. Or but you know, maybe pay to have her hair and makeup done.

No wahine will be upset being told to go shopping. Yeah, fair call. I absolutely agree. Some people saying, you know, sounds like maybe she's not in a good headspace at the moment. Maybe the chat is not about her appearance, but more of like,

how are you doing in general chat, which is some good advice in there. Some people coming in being like, yeah, man, tell her to take more pride in her appearance. You can't word it any other way. That's so ruthless. I think most of all, all the women messaging in are like, take the woman shopping.

Take the woman shopping. Okay, so if we can surmise, it would be don't say take more pride in your appearance. Word that in a more constructive way with some compliments. A more constructive way. And go shopping. And here's one message in. I am in business and attend loads of events with ladies

such as the ex-Prime Minister. Ladies such as the ex-Prime Minister. Or there's Jenny Shipley and Helen Clark. Yeah. You'd never catch Helen Clark in some Lululemons. No, you wouldn't. At a formal event. So I attend events with ex-prime ministers,

and no one even cares what you wear. Let her wear what she wants. It's about how you act. That is more important. Okay. Oh, my God, so many messages. I can't even get to the top. Basically, don't stress about what she's wearing.

If your workmates care, they're not good friends, buy her something nice, take the woman shopping. And then the last message we received, maybe you're the issue. Oh. Play ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchvorn and

Hayley. Well, he landed this morning from a plane, jumped on a plane at LAX and flew all the way into Auckland, left his bag on the plane and then went home to drop his bags off, his lightsabers off at home. Vaughan joins us this morning. Good morning, Vaughan.

Hey, everybody. Good morning. Not at work like we thought you'd be. Yeah, two red lines got in my way when I got home. No! He's got the vid! I've got the vid. You did a pre-departure test, though, didn't you?

You did a pre-departure test. Oh, my God. There's a whole lot. I'm like, ah, bastard, I've got the vid. Excuse my language. I've got the vid. But I got the pre-departure test, which was negative,

which allowed me to come home. On the way home, we got waylaid a little bit of traffic. And so I missed the girls. I didn't get to see the girls before they went to school. And then I came in and there's a day zero test

you have to do when you come back to New Zealand. And I was like, I'll do this before I come into work. So I did a round the old throat hole. I went up both nostrils, mixed it with the wooded drip drip, it was like Fletcher's. As

soon as it passed that first line, it was just like red. I was like, oh no. So you have COVID. You've got American. I have the novel coronavirus. I might have the American one. Oh my God.

I was having sexual relations with people who had been to the novel coronavirus. I might have, I might have the American one. Oh my God. Ooh, spicy. And you know, I was, I was having sexual relations with people who had been to monkey sex parties as well. So I've been. You could have monkey pox. I could have monkey pox as well.

Or monkey pox coronavirus. Could be, you could have a hybrid. Monkey pox first. Okay, so this is, oh, you really timed this poorly. You could have had a free week in America at a hotel.

No, I would much rather do it at home than I would in America in a hotel. Are you somewhat relieved, Vaughn, because you were busting your gut, basically, to not get COVID before heading to your Disneyland Star Wars celebration, and you did it, basically. Yeah, I got it done, and I I got home and now it's got me. But I feel, today, a little headachy. But you know when you get off a long flight, you always feel like that anyway?

Well, that's also probably the sleeping pill and the whiskeys. Oh, Daddy loves his sleeping pills and whiskeys. He might have a week-long sleeping pill and whiskey to approach this COVID. Yeah, all right. Well, rest up. And yeah, maybe you'll be here tomorrow. Maybe you won't be. You might have a week-long sleeping pill and whiskey to approach this COVID. Yeah. All right, well, rest up. And, yeah, maybe you'll be here tomorrow. Maybe you won't be.

Yeah. What do you mean here tomorrow? I'm not going to die. Well, you don't know. Ten people a day are dying. Oh, Jesus. Why did you say that to me? I'm worried.

You guys are going to bring me like soups and barmy. You live way too far away for that. I don't even have a car. It would take me like eight hours to walk there. That's good for you though. Luckily. Oh yeah, but your wife can't leave, can she? Because she's also isolating.

So I haven't seen them yet. Oh, right. Like in person. So I'm like, don't come home. I don't know. Where do they go? They should just stay away. Yeah. Yeah, leave. Put them up in I'm like, don't come home. I don't know. Where do they go? They should just stay away.

Yeah. Put them up in a nice hotel. Treat the girl. Get a nice little Airbnb for the week. It'll be lovely. All right. Well, you rest up. Vaughan has COVID.

Great. Well, that's another one we can cross off the staff COVID list. Yeah, I thought I was going to win that one too. I'm so wildly antisocial. Yeah. Well, that's what I was saying to everybody. You finally go and socialise with people and leave your house and you get it. Yeah. Yeah.

Like the rest of us. All right, we'll rest up. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, I want to ask a question now if you've got a criminal grandparent. Because, you know, some, not all, but some old people they get a bit grumpy, don't they? Oh, they do. Commudgeons. And you know, they're old

so they feel like they've got zero patience left with life and people and shenanigans. And everything's moving too fast for them. You know, technology is leaving them behind. Their grandparents don't, their grandkids don't visit them anymore. The TV's not how it used to be.

Well, a pensioner, a granny in the UK, she's 68. She has been accused of keying locals' cars after a parking row. And, yeah, she... Yeah, there's been a lot of warnings in the area, and they're calling her the gangster granny. She's been labelled the gangster granny. I love that they're calling it vigilante activity.

Yeah, apparently there was a 40, a very expensive Audi, an $80,000 New Zealand Audi that was keyed. Oh, my God. Deliberately, she's denying all of this, by the way. Of course she would. Of course she would. But apparently their fingers pointed at her because she's been the one that's been upset

with all the parking in the area. I do want to say I've just opened up this article alongside you and scrolled down to see this sassy criminal granny. She doesn't look like you'd think, does she? She's very... She's a bit ooh-la-la. She looks like an ooh-la-la granny. She's got a bloody attitude on. She's a bit ooh-la-la. She looks like an ooh-la-la granny.

She's got a red lip on and a fur collar, which I can only imagine is real fur, let's be honest. Gangster granny. So she's been keying things because she's basically like, stop parking, stop parking on us. So they put a notice up on the street where it's happening and saying, and this is what the notice says, since retiring in late December 2021,

not content with retiring gracefully, this gangster granny has taken to harassing local employees, both verbally and by email, regarding parking on the high street. Lately, she's taken her campaign a step further and now resorts to keying parked cars without permits, causing hundreds of pounds worth of damage. And, yeah, it's been reported to police. But, yeah, she's 68, and she's taken the law into her own hands.

But this is what grannies do, don't they? They get upset, and they take the law into their own hands. So I just want to ask the question this morning, does anybody have a grandparent that's maybe taken it a bit far and they've got a criminal grandparent? So do you want people who have grandparents that have committed crimes

in their later granny years? I think so. You don't want a gran who was in a gang in her 20s. Yeah, yeah, no, no. We want them as they're older and they don't cry. When they've got into trouble as they're older, maybe they didn't get a record. But, you know, maybe grandad was sick of the boy racers,

so he drove his little Echo around and rammed them. Or something else. I mean, like, all of our grandparents would have lost their licenses at some point, and that makes them very grumpy, and they just continue driving for a bit. Yeah, well, that makes them a criminal, doesn't it? Absolute crime. 0800DARLS.

If you want to take your calls now, you can text as well, 9696. Do you have a criminal grandparent? You can call anonymously. We won't have them in. Even just those moments where if they were caught doing what they were doing, they'd go down for it. Yes. But, you know, because they're old, they think they can get away with it.

Give us a call. You're criminal grannies and granddads. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Well, there's a granny in the UK who they've dubbed the gangster granny. She's keying cars, very expensive cars on High Street because they don't have the correct council parking permits. Yes, and she has, as a little side note,

won an award for the front of her house. And all these cars are muddying the face of the house because they've won an award, you see. Some responses on Instagram. And we want to know about your gangster grannies or granddads, whether or not they've officially done time or received a police charge. Oh my goodness, I'm just having a look at the texts. It's crazy, right?

Like, I can't wait till you get to that age where you think nothing applies to you. There are so many grandparents up to no good out there, oh my god. And I think I would, because what have you got to lose? You're going to die soon, right? Oh my god, some? Oh, my God. Some of these are so funny. Granddad grows the 420 alongside his tomatoes and cabbages. Hasn't been caught, though.

Somebody said, not mine, but I'm really excited for the day. I get to tell my baby, you know, Granddad robbed a bank. Oh, my God. Amazing. Wow. My partner's Nana does. She went to prison for two years but swears she didn't do it. They all say, I didn't do it.

Wow. So many messages and calls. We'll get to some calls first. Anonymous, you've got a criminal granny or granddad? Oh, my coro, yeah. Okay. And what's he done? Oh, so he had just retired,

and at the time I was working for a pest control firm killing, like, pest weeds. Yeah. So I had access to some pretty nasty chemicals, and he had moved to Wanaka, and his neighbour in front of him in Wanaka had a row of trees that spoiled his view. Oh, my God.

So, yeah, so he asked me if I could get a hold of some chemicals, so I just grabbed some from work and gave it to him, and then, yeah, six months later, the trees in front of the house were dead. That's so naughty. And now he's got a lovely mountain and lake view. I can... To be honest, it's probably added 200 grand worth of value to his house

because he can see the lake now. Yeah. Oh, my God. That is such an old mate thing to do, isn't it? Poison some trees in the middle of the night. I love it. Anonymous, thank you. Amy, you've got a gangster granny?

Yeah, she stole some fish from Western Springs. Out of the pond? Yeah. How did she do that? Did she take a net down? No, we were just there. So it's my mum, so the granny to my kids. We were just there for a walk and she saw some little fish and she was like,

oh, I wonder what these fish are. So she emptied my son's lunchbox and scooped them up and took them home. Oh my God, in the lunchbox! Oh my God, I love their attitude of just like, I like that, I'm going to take it. Aren't they like those koi carp,

those, like, aren't they a pest fish? You're not supposed to, yeah, we don't want them. Yeah, I don't know, they're just really tiny. They're still in the bucket at home and they're still alive and you can find them special food and little plants and stuff. At least he's living a good life. At least he's having some fun.

Yeah, amazing. Amy, thank you. Some text messages in. My granddad got DIC'd at 10am on his way to the mall. Oh, my God. Granddad. I love this. Not sure if you'll read this.

Oh, I'm going to read it. My 85-year-old white nana is a criminal in China. She smuggled Bibles across the border into China, which is highly illegal. What a badass. My grandma is our town's biggest weed dealer. Amazing. And I will say there is quite a few of those.

Yeah. Well, it helps with the arthritis, doesn't it? Yeah, well, look, my grandma loved making special brownies for her mates in pain. She lives on the West Coast. Her and her partner had a bloody great time. My nanny was tired of seeing a sign

in front of her neighbour's house. The sign said stop putting fluorine into our water, which she disagrees with, so she went down and drew all over it, vandalised it. Oh, wow. Oh, my God. Lisa here, my nana, broke out of her rest home last Friday for a haircut. They are in COVID lockdown and she didn't tell me that.

Oh, right. When I picked her up, she was eagerly waiting around the corner of the building. Oh, my God, she was hiding behind the building later that afternoon. She tested positive for COVID. That's not good. Oh, wow. So she took it back into the rest home. Oh, God. Oh, my COVID. That's not good. Oh, wow. So she took it back into the rest home. Oh, God.

Oh, my God. This is so good. My nana in her late 60s got revenge on my granddad who had cheated on her. She went out in the middle of the night and sprayed his entire garden with weed killer and spray painted a nasty word across his garage for the whole community to see. She also peed

in the vinegar bottles in his fishing boat. She's my absolute idol. She's been gone for a couple of years now. This is so good. Wow, I love this. My nana is 76. She just brought herself a turbo Audi and drives at 90k an hour everywhere. In a 50 or in a 100.

My grandfather was caught bootlegging. Oh, okay. Doing the booze, making the illegal booze. I love this. Hi, Pascal here. Grandfather, 25 years in prison in Sicily. Oh, murder conspiracy. Okay, that's not... We were probably after the lighter ones, weren't we?

Yeah, well, I'll do a slightly softer one. It was called Sly Grogging held at Mount Eden Prison. Here's a nicer one. My grandmother takes glasses from restaurants and bars that she likes the look of and she has a cupboard full of branded glasses from different pubs. No one would

ever think to stop a granny leaving a bar or a nice restaurant and searching their bag for a glass. Yeah, with like a clinking handbag full of glasses. Play it. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's Fact of the Day comes to us from an article I found on Vice News.

And it is about the only remaining singer of this band here. The Offspring, which you'll remember. Oh, my God. The Offspring is so great, but I think Spotify thinks I like them more than I do. Because you know those, like, made-for-me playlists? Yeah. At the moment, mine is so much of The Offspring

and Jamiroquai anyway. Yeah, I don't think it knows you. Well, this article is all about Dexter Holland, who is the lead singer of The Offspring. A long time ago, Vaughn and I spoke to him in an interview. Very interesting man. He started a hot sauce company in 2004. It's a huge hot sauce company.

Gringo Bandito. Yeah, that's it. He makes Gringo Bandito. Yeah, which is crazy. You'll know it if you Google it. You'll know they're hot sauce. Yeah, that's it. He makes Gringo Bandito. Yeah, which is crazy. You'll know it if you Google it. You'll know they're hot. Yeah, that is not today's fact of the day. Today's fact of the day is that the lead singer of this band,

Dexter Holland, has a PhD in molecular biology, which he gained in 2017 from the University of Southern California, and he is now dedicating his life to HIV research. That's so crazy because I've got the exact same PhD. That's so crazy. And you're doing nothing with your life. I'm doing absolutely nothing with it. No.

Who would have thought? I guess because the offspring has that image of being like little like rascals. Yeah, like punk rascals. Yeah, exactly. But crazy, right? Yeah, I was reading up on this that, because when I read this, that he was focusing the rest of his life

on the research around HIV. I assumed he must have had an HIV diagnosis, but he hasn't. The only, he said in a quote, that the reason he wanted to get this doctorate was because 35 million people around the world live with HIV and a million people a year die from it. So he was like, why would I want to put my life to stupid music anymore?

Yeah. I'm going to do this instead. It's crazy. It's an amazing article. Have a look on Vice if you're interested more in it. But I think he was at that stage where he was going to study and then the Offspring kind of took off in the 90s. Oh, right, and he chose music.

And then he kind of came back to it a bit later, along with his hot sauce. So, yeah, wow. So today's fact of the day, the lead singer of this band, the Offspring, Dexter Holland, not only has a very successful hot sauce company, but has a PhD in molecular biology from the University of Southern California and is now dedicating his life to HIV research.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. So if you're wondering why I'm broadcasting from home I do not have COVID I am filming The Great Kiwi Bake Off at the moment Season 4 And it films very close to my house So you've got a set time not have COVID. I am filming The Great Kiwi Bake Off at the moment, season four, and it films very close to my house. So you've got a set time of like just after nine, so you can literally

drive up the road and you're there for your second job. And I'm there. So I am, oh, it has been announced, so I can talk about this. So it's been announced that I have a new co-host in the wonderful Pax Asadi, comedian and good friend of mine. So we've been hanging out on set a lot, obviously.

Because you get a lot of downtime, don't you, when the things are in the oven? Yeah, sometimes, like, if they're doing a four-hour bake, we might just be, like, kicking it back. And, of course, yesterday in the afternoon, I say, of course, I'm new to this world. It was the Eastern Conference for the NBA. And I, to preface this, I have never been into any sport ever.

I've never followed any sport other than marching. And I only follow marching because I do it. And, you know, I've never sort of had a sport that I get really into. And Pax Asati, the boy, loves basketball. He loves his basketball. I would say it's one of the best games to watch live, like in person. It is thrilling. It's so thrilling.

I didn't even know about the rules. Like one team can only have the ball for 24 seconds, and then they have to shoot. And if they don't shoot in that time, they get a penalty, and then it's going to go to the other team. It's so quick. I love it. The only thing that's going to go to the other team. It's so quick. I love it. The only thing that's annoying are all

of the timeouts. It's so, it takes forever. They're teasing us a little bit. Anyway, so I've never been interested and then Pax was like, I'm going to watch this. And I was like, and then they sometimes have like halftime cheerleaders. Yesterday they had a

halftime like elderly dancing group. And I was like, this is what I'm into. Yeah. But something's happened. Over the last 24 hours, I've become a basketball fanatic. And now I will die for Miami Heat. Are they your team? They're my team.

And yesterday it was the Eastern Conference and they lost. And I don't know how I went from, like, absolutely not caring about basketball at all to literally, like, up in my seat screaming. They lost by four points. They nearly had it. They nearly had it, Fletch. They could have done it a thousand times, but they kept making these stupid shots,

trying to go for three-pointers. Are you now hanging out for the next game? I'm a basketball gal. Well, they haven't gone in, so I have decided that I now golden state because they are taking on Boston Celtics. I don't know. Boston Celtics is who beat Miami Heat.

Right. Aren't you meant to just pick a team and stay with them? You're just going for whoever's winning. Yeah, well, my team is out, so I'm now switching teams. Right, but I'm not going with Boston. Will you go back to Miami? Maybe one day.

I do say that I don't know how I got into this from zero to 1,000 in 24 hours. I do. Pax was like, you're always watching the entertaining bits

of basketball. And I was like, yes. And then he said, do you like the look of the boys? And I said, yes. Obviously, I like a big man. And so then he started... Well, they're all tall, aren't they?

They're gorgeous. Yeah. And then he started going through all of the Miami Heat men and being like, hot, hot? I'd be like, yeah, that's hot. Nah, too clean, too tidy. Yeah, he's hot. So basically I've become a sports fanatic.

I'm thinking about getting a Miami Heat tattoo. I'm thinking about going to Miami. It sounds like you've become a sports pest, to be honest. That is precisely what has happened, and I'm really happy about it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley bring you

Banger's Bingo with Smirnoff Soda. So it's all thanks to Smirnoff Soda, available at LiquorSource now in three epic flavours. We're coming to a location near you, hopefully. These are the dates that we've announced.

Waikato, the Keg Room on the 21st of June. It all kicks off. Bangers, bingo. Auckland, Wynyard Pavilion on the 22nd of June. Tauranga, Freeport with Cleaver & Co on the 28th of June. Wellington, the Tasting Room on the 29th of June. That's a Wednesday. Christchurch, Fat Eddie's on the 29th of June. That's a Wednesday. Christchurch Fat Eddies

on the 2nd of August, Tuesday. Dunedin will be at Vault 22 on the 9th of August and Palmy at Rosie O'Grady's on the 23rd of August. So those are the events that you can register for. A team of you and three mates. So we're looking for teams of four. You can go to ZM Online to register

or if you just text right now BINGO to 9696, we'll send you back automatically a link that you can follow and register and then we'll get back to you and get your place at Bangers Bingo for your chance to win cash and prizes. It's like Bingo, but instead of drawing the numbers, we just play songs and you've just got to be the first to fill out your board to win cash and prizes. Bangers Bingo is back.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.