ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 4th August 2022

Episode Date: August 3, 2022

Navigation Skills  Mt Taranaki Cats  Silly Little Poll!  Why are you with your Partner?  Quiet Quitting  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Hello, welcome to the Fleach, Horn and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Download the McDonald's app and earn rewards on your coffee. No Vaughan today, as you'll hear in the show, because he's got the man flu, he's got the cold. Hayley, about to go to TVNZ to film. Have you been paying attention? You've got to do the TVNZ public broadcaster rat test. It's so deep! Before you enter

the building, because I don't want to put people like Hilary Barry, Simon DeLow, for a bunch of stupid comedians downstairs. At risk. Yeah, they don't want to put the stars at risk, so do you still have to go in the back entrance? Yeah, we're not allowed in. They've got us locked in the basement downstairs

because they wouldn't. With a port-a-loo? No, we're allowed in the toilets now. Oh, you're allowed in the toilets now. We're allowed to dump with dignity. It's so embarrassing. We'd have these celebrity guests come in and they'll be like,

oh, where's the bathroom? You'd be like, I'm sorry. You have to use the grotty port-a-loo. Actually, it wasn't grotty It was very cool So I'm just doing My rat test now And we thought Live

Live on the podcast Okay Why not? Oh Vaughn just messaged What does he want? Just talking about something else Not for Ronnie Not for

It's just personal business Just personal business Should we get into it? Yeah get in What? Oh it's personal business Oh no no Alright you're going to drop a couple of...

Oh, the slop. Oh, yuck. That's disgusting. Don't look. Open up your... Hang on. I've got to put the slop away. The people waiting with anticipation here for your rat test.

I feel like we used to do them all the time. And now hardly anyone. No, I still haven't had it. I'm the only one. Isn't there like an office sweepstakes? Yeah, there's five people at work that are still to have it. And you're one of them. And what do you win?

You win full functioning lungs. It's a frothy one. Oh, I hate that. Yeah, it takes a while. You had too much snot in your nose. You've got to blow your nose before you do it next time. I don't think it's going to work. Well, it'll just take a while.

That is disgusting. Look, it's frothy. That is absolutely disgusting oh no here it goes here it goes okay one more frothy drop why is my nose frothy disgusting all right well that's uh running up part past the test line how's that looking this could be the most exciting podcast. Nah, she's good. Again, again. How are you not getting it?

I'm not trying not to. You know what I mean? Well, you haven't been to the gym for a while, have you? I went on Monday. Yeah, it's Thursday. When did you last go? Tuesday. No, because we went to?

Monday. You shit. Okay, well, I should probably go. You last went on Monday because we went to Christchurch. We've been away. We've been away. Oh, my God. Okay, well, you're negative.

Fantastic. Vaughn may be back tomorrow. That's a neggy. That's a neggy. So Vaughn may be back tomorrow. Otherwise, it'll be us That's a negi. So Vaughan may be back tomorrow. Otherwise, it'll be us again tomorrow with the lineup for Friday Jams as well. Oh, yeah. Look forward to that.

Thank you, Sam. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. It's one minute past six. Vaughan today, not with us. He's got a sniffle. He's got a sniffle. He's got a sniffle. Which, you know, in today's COVID work environment,

you shouldn't come to work with any kind of... Back in the day, you'd just... Oh, back in the day, you would have been here with a box of tissues and those bloody butterscotch lozenges. Butterscotch menthols. Not COVID, though, I believe. Not COVID, no. He's done a test.

He's done a test. I'm trying to look for the Commonwealth Games table. This is funky music. We are still number three on the medal table with 14 golds. Canada are nipping at our heels with 12 gold medals, but we're ahead of them. We've only got 30 medals in total, but we're still three on the list. Only 30? No, but...

We're tiny. Yeah, but they're... I know, I know. It's incredible. But I'm just saying, like, Canada have 48 medals, and they're fourth. I'm a big per capita gal. Oh, you're... Per capita.

We're blitzing. We're blitzing the field. Surely they can give me a per capita. Australia number one on the medal tables at the Commonwealth Games with 111 medals. 42 golds. England is second with 35 golds and 93 medals total. But yeah, New Zealand, absolute overnight. More medals, as you heard Sam just mention.

There's got to be something in the water. We're very good at sport. We're very good at sport. Yeah. Well, could you imagine if marching was at the Commonwealth Games? We'd take that out. Yeah. Because no other countries could enter.

It's a New Zealand exclusive sport. Exactly. No one else does it. No. Yeah. Coming up on the show today, more chances for you to win our grocery grab thanks to the warehouses back at 8 o'clock. We'll do that just before the news.

The Activator will be listening out for that. And thanks to Bluebird, we've got more bags of Bluebird chips in studio. Your chance to free the cash bird. And we're going to do that around 7.30 this morning. Yesterday we gave away $6.50. Day before $1,000. Day before that, $7.50. So lots of cash to give away.

We've also had chips for breakfast every morning. We have, but I mean that's just part of the job. It's coming up $7.30, your chance to win. I don't think that was part of the contract that once you open the bag, you then have to eat it and then all the rest of the bag. We just have to.

Next on the show, an Aussie road worker has hit back online after people have been making fun of her job. Because of what they just say, oh, you're just a stop-go worker. All you do is this. Well, you stand around doing nothing. That's a favourite, isn't it? Yeah.

When you drive past roadworks and you're like, female, has hit back online. She shares a lot of her job on TikTok. Yeah. To, at, to turnt traffic girl. Okay. It's turnt. Is that a cool thing, is it? Turnt.

Carween. I don't think people have been saying that for, like, forever. Turnt? Yeah, it's not a new word. No, it's... Well, it's new to me. This is, like, when I found out about the... Yeet.

Yeet. I'd never heard yeet. Oh, yeet. Okay, so turnt is, like, lit. Yeah, like, lit. But, like, that... People... I thought people haven't been saying that for, like, a long time, right? Yeah, it's kind of odd. Well, maybe she's had this for a long time. Maybe she has, yeah. Too turnt, like lit. But like that, people, I thought people haven't been saying that for like a long time, right?

Yeah. Well, maybe she's had this for a long time. Maybe she has, yeah. Two-turn traffic girl. Anyway, she hit back at the trolls. Everyone was like, well, not everyone, but a lot of people were going online being like, get a real job, like unskilled work. Anyone could do that, just standing around doing nothing, as we see before.

Yeah, it's a classic that's quite often leveled at road workers, not by myself at all. I've seen you wind down a window and have abuse. Even when I see 30 of them just standing there a pothole doing nothing, I'm like, I would never say that. Texting on the phone. Yeah. Well, she shared like a series of videos that showed how much she earns in a week. Because she was like, you're making fun of my job as you're heading to your job

where you work way harder than I do and make way less money. Really? Like how much money is she earning? And this is in Australia. This is in Aussies. Mind you, okay. Up to $3,000,

just over $3,000 a week. What? A week. So she goes- But like being the traffic controller, like stop, go. Yeah, stop, go. So she was saying like it's all based on

the hours you work. You get paid more if you're doing the night shift. Overtime and overnight. Overtime, overnight. She gets a living away allowance if like where she's on the road is too far from her home and then they put her up somewhere. Because I guess if they're doing roadworks

in the middle of nowhere and they just get a motel down the road. Yeah, totally. So they pay for your accommodation if you're away from home. So everything added up. She did a week. She said, Monday I worked 13 hours. Tuesday I worked 12 hours.

These are long days. Yeah. I work four. Wednesday, 12 hours. Thursday, 12 hours. Friday, five and a half hours. At the end of that week, she had earned

$3,073.75 Wow. Which is an astonishing pay. That's insane. And so for those people like having a go at her, they would very, almost all of them would have to pretty quickly eat their words. Absolutely. Because that is insane money.

So then she said, she was saying like another week she took home $2,300. So it averages over a year about two and a half grand a week, Aussie dollars. Wow. Which is like at $130,000 salary. That's a big salary. Yeah. That is like incredible.

And I think people would think, you know, unskilled workers working for nothing. God, no. And then she was saying like, it's honestly the best job in the world. I'm outside. I enjoy myself. There's a lot to it. Like, you have to be alert, ready for anything. Yeah.

And she's making bank. Yeah. She's turnt. She does. She would have to wear that, like, an orange high-vis, like, sun hat. Yeah, but she's got lovely black hair. Right. So, fluoros.

It goes well. Because I don't pseudo-fluoro anything. I'm not a fluoro orange person. It's not my colour wheel. It's not in your colour wheel. Like, if they did a fluoro blue, because I'm very navy. You're very blue-based. I'm very blue-based. He's very blue-based. I don't think they do a fluoro blue. Yeah, they don't, do they?

Like a highlighter blue? It's not really... Fluoro is like an alarming, is to see you, and then blue is like a calming sort of... Yeah, they don't, do they? Like a highlighter blue? It's not really... Fluro is like an alarming, is to see you. And then blue is like a calming sort of... Yeah, so a calming blue road worker. Yeah, you're going to get killed. Almost Smurf-like is not going to work, is it? No, you've got to pick between the orange and the yellow. Okay, well just...

See, I could do it, but I'd have to get a few spray tans. Yeah. You know what I mean? To bring it... Totally wash it down. You could go yellow. You could be a fluro yellow maybe. But I'd have to tan up. Yeah. You know what I mean? You could go yellow. You could be a flurry of yellow maybe. But I'd have to tan up.

Yeah. Tan up quite a bit. Do road workers, do the traffic controllers, road workers earn that the same in New Zealand? Would that be similar? I mean,

no one earns the same in New Zealand as they do in Australia. So I've got a lot of hours free after I finish here. We could do a night shift and then just turn up. Just do a night shift,

turn up and be making bank. I feel like I have read and heard that road workers in New Zealand get paid great money. Yeah, right. I don't know if it's this much, but, man, I might be looking at a career change. Think about that next time you say something out the window when you're being held up. If you see us on the side of the road, just say hi. Yeah, don't throw your sticky butts at us.

You don't. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Well, Afterpay, you may have received an email if you're with Afterpay, have warned customers about a scam that's going around. Like, there's a scam for everything. Like, they just had the cost of living payments this week go into bank accounts and there's already people trying to take advantage of that. Oh, by saying like send us your details.

So you've got to be so careful. And even like bank scams now, like the numbers look like they're from your bank. I know, they're so sophisticated. Even if you think you're pretty onto it, because I always check all, even when I click links from legitimate like organisations, I always click the email just to double check, to see that

it's from them, not like 1282.gmail.com. Yes, yes, yes. Because it could be so easy to do. I've had a few 1282s at gmail.com. That same person. There you go. That's them. So apparently the Afterpay scam,

people are receiving text messages and messages with verification codes and links, and then people are clicking on them and then filling out their customer details. Don't, no, don't do that. Yeah, and so basically they're saying that cyber criminals are likely going through a list of mobile numbers

and have spoofed their own numbers. So it appears to be from the company. So they can use this technology to make it look like it's coming from Afterpay. So just be super careful. Yeah, even coming up in your phone, it'll say Afterpay. Like it's pretty, it's pretty devious. It's very sophisticated. The one I've been getting a lot lately is the,

hey, can you please help me with something? Do you do that on Instagram? On Instagram? Yeah, yeah. And it's like. It means someone's account's been breached. Yes. Yeah.

And then they say, I need you to help. Like Instagram needs me to verify my account. In order to do so, I need to have someone. And then they say, I need you to help. Instagram needs me to verify my account. In order to do so, I need to have someone. And you're like, oh, what? And when it's your friends, you're like, oh, sure, dude. What do you need? And then suddenly you're like, hang on a second. Hang on, you don't talk like that. Yeah, they want you to get a

verification to try and log into something and then they get your details and then scam you. And then scam you. Yeah. It's multi-layered scam. It's multi-layered. I've been scammed for a while. The last one I fell for was the classic, you have a package that needs clearing customs. You've got to pay a dollar something to clear it.

And then you put it in your eye and I was like, yeah, here's a dollar. And then instantly I was like, oh, I've been scammed. I've been scammed. So did you just let them have a dollar or did you have to cancel your credit card? I put it on hold. Oh, yeah. I put it on hold.

No, I didn't cancel my credit card because I don't think I paid with credit card. I think I did a bank transfer. Oh, okay. But you think about even if they got a thousand people in a day out of a hundred thousand emails That's a good pay right And they always go for the elderly

They're always going for like older people Or boomers who are like But see I reckon there'd be more people That shop so much online Like yourself That you're just like Oh yeah that must be my package It was coming today or tomorrow

Okay do it And then oh There probably is something waiting for me At customs from Australia. 621. Not those new shoes that you've got on today. I am wearing new shoes today. Did you have to explain that to the fiancé? Do you know what? I chose

honesty last night. How did that go down? It went down alright. You don't sound... It went down okay. Okay, yeah. We're talking. Okay. We're talking. Play Z talking. Okay. We're talking. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. You're a man about town.

You get around the town and... Where is this going? Scoot around. I'm a scootery, yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. When I followed you... Oh, that sounds weird.

When I followed you to your home. But when I've scooted with you, you know all the back streets and the pathways and little shortcuts. So would you say that you've got good navigational skills? Yes. Well, I'm familiar because I've lived in the city for a while. Do they translate outside of the CBD?

I'd like to think so. Yeah. I mean, Auckland, like cities like Auckland are easy because you look for the big pointy sky tower you can see from anywhere.

You always know where you are. But get me in the suburbs of Christchurch and sometimes I'm a little bit like this all looks flat and the same to me. If you can't see

the port hills. Yeah, and then you'll see one like shop or building or bar and you're like, oh. Yeah. And Wellington, I know my way around but then you can just look up at the hill.

So you kind of get your bearings. Where's the ocean? Yeah. Well, a recent study was published that reports approximately three individuals in the world, 3% of individuals are affected by something that they have named developmental topographical disorientation. So that no matter what, they are terrible with directions. Whether they're like local, outside, they're like, I don't know which way is north, I don't know if I'm heading up or down.

You know like when you're driving in New Zealand and you always know whether you're heading down or up. Yeah. Never across. Never. Well, yeah. The coasts. You don't do the coasts. I don't mess around with the coasts.

But you always know. You always know. But they were saying it's like when you've got that kind of terrible navigation where you're like, where are we? Which way are we? Where are we going? I don't know. And you can't find yourself on the earth. Yeah.

It's not just like, oh, you loo-lelly. It's actually something in the brain. Right. Even if I'm on a roadie with friends or we're driving somewhere, sometimes I'll just get my maps out just to see, like, where we're going, if we're taking the best way. Yeah, do we need a shortcut? I need to know, like, you know, how long we're going to be.

Yeah, for sure. I just like to kind of be all over it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that cheating? No, that's not cheating. Using your maps? No, it's just kind of... I use maps sometimes,

especially because we live in a city with terrible traffic. So I'm like, if there's a better route, you show it to me. I think I know one of these 3% of the world's population, and you do too, producer Jared, are terrible with knowing where he is at any time.

Absolutely shocking. I think Google Maps is probably the most opened app on my phone. Yeah. Because the other day, Jared's just moved flats. He's like, guys, I live right by the train tracks.

Oh my God. He's like, I heard a train. I'm like, Jared, where do you live? He showed me where he lived. I'm like, Jared,

you're two kilometres from the train. But Jared, you were so adamant. You were like, yes, there is. I was like, these guys are idiots. I've driven over this railway

crossing so many times. Yeah, yeah. You have, but it's just like a K and a half from your house. Yeah, it's ages from my house. I got real mixed up. So you don't even know where you live. Barely. Because you've got this thing. Hayley's just said, this is what you've got. You've got developmental topographical disorientation.

Yeah. It's probably all the vaping. The vaping. It's all the great vape. Like when mum and dad used to drive me to soccer practice, I always used to be reading in the back, so I never actually looked out the window. Reading in the car. Yeah.

Oh, that makes you sick, doesn't it? I don't have a tummy. Also, North Shore people in Auckland are terrible once they get over the bridge. They don't know, even if they grow up here. Oh, yeah. There's two points on the motorway I'm absolutely terrified of,

and it's when these little concrete barriers come up and splits the motorway into three sections. And I'm always like, I don't know if I'm going to Hamilton or Hellensville, man. It's just stressful. It's terrible if you want to get into work at the CBD and suddenly you're on the highway to Hamilton. And you're like, well, that's it.

I just have to go to Hamilton now. You can't get off. You can't get off. There are a hundred off exits, but I mean, you're going to Hamilton now. You don't know which one's going to take you to work.

Vaughn's sick today with these sniffles. Yeah, a few texts coming in asking where he is. We thought about doing a premature death announcement, but we'll just wait. Too soon. I think it's too soon. Not COVID.

He doesn't have COVID. He's just got... No, just the... You know the cold that's going around that just... I had it when we had holidays. Just snotty and all like... Yeah. The Department of Conservation has issued a warning and this is wild.

So the Department of Conservation and they released some photos. You can find these online. It's popped up in the news on the news sites last night. A group of Aucklanders who had visited Mount Taranaki in my hometown. It's your mauna. In my home region. And they were seen with their cats in little, like they were all rugged up in little jackets on their backpacks and then cat carry backpacks up the mountain in the national park, which they say they didn't know they weren't allowed to do.

You're not allowed to bring any pets, even dogs, even cute little chihuahuas on a leash. You're not even allowed to bring those into the national park because of the wildlife. Because of the wildlife. I mean, a dog's probably not going to immediately go and pounce on a chetidoo or a kiwi. Well, you hope not.

A cat would. A cat would. Chitteroo. Or a Kiwi. Well, you hope not. But man, a cat would. A cat would. Oh, absolutely. And also, I mean, there are Kiwis up there as well. I've seen in some of the huts and you can, at night, you can hear the Kiwis calling out. What does a Kiwi sound like? Like a...

That was too... Wow, really? That's how native bird's sound? That is, we call ourselves Kiwis after. Wait, let me plug in the thing. It doesn't say. That's terrible. I don't think I've ever heard a Kiwi.

Okay, I've gone on YouTube. Let's see if this will work. That was the YouTube clip youtube is that working no no i don't know you're gonna have to just do it again manually yeah you sound like a south park character Can you hear that? Yeah Kind of scream Yes See I mean you're not the sexiest Oh god it's terrifying actually

I don't know why It's the wrong one I've plugged your one in Here we go Stand by Stand by That's not them That's a kiwi Oh, here we go. Stand by, stand by. That's not them.

That's a kiwi. Yeah, that's a kiwi. It needs to shut up. I mean, if you live near that, you'd probably find that quite annoying and probably get the shotgun, right? Yeah. It sounds like a seagull. So these photos that are online are wild. Like, these cats must be very tame.

Oh, my God. If I tried to put Rolly in a backpack. No, same. Like, cause I always get tagged in, you know, those clear plastic. Yeah, with the dome. The dome, the cat backpacks. But these aren't even those. They're just like kind of sitting on top of backpacks

or strapped in and they just look like quite placid. And also they're holidaying with their cat from Auckland in Taranaki. Oh my God, the poor cats. The poor cats are just like, they're treating them like their cat from Auckland in Taranaki. Oh, my God. The poor cats. The poor cats are just like, they're treating them like dogs. They're not a dog. I can't imagine any cat that would love that.

Well, especially like wearing a jacket. You know, if you put like, if I even put a collar on Raleigh, because he can't wear a collar. He just is like, like his head just kind of flips back. Like the girl from The Exorcism. The Exorcist. The Exorcist. It's a no. It's a no from me.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. There is a job up for offer. And it is a job I reckon a lot of people would want, including myself. But little fine detail, you've got to move to Canada. Not a bad place to live. Not a bad place to live, is it? No. Cold? Extremely. But then also can be extremely

hot in summer. Okay, I'll think about it. I'll tell you a little bit more about the job and then we can make a decision. Okay. So a Canadian company by the name of Candy Funhouse Okay, I'm in. Already I'm in. Created a job listing in search of the world's first quote, I'm in. Already I'm in. Created a job listing in search of the world's first

quote, chief candy officer. So what does the job entail? The job description reads, we're looking for the world's first and only chief candy officer. This opportunity is a work from home with the option to work out of the Toronto or

Newark office if you want to or just work at home paying up to $100,000 annually which is in New Zealand dollars from Canadian it's like $120. Yeah. $120-ish. They basically includes

approving all candy in inventory. So you just, the candy comes in to come into the Candy Fun House. You try it and you approve it and deciding whether or not to award each treat with the official chief candy officer's stamp of approval. So this is basically like what you do when you're watching Netflix, but it's work.

But it's work. You're getting paid for it. Yeah. Just eating lollies and getting paid for it. With this job, you're going to... This is... Oh my God, my heart. You're going to test more than three and a half

thousand candy products a month. Okay, so even if you ate one lolly from each packet. Yeah. Because you've got to eat so many in a work day. Yeah. That is, how much sugar are you getting? Don't worry about the sugar. Let's just go three and a half thousand

divided by 29 on average. Oh no, it's 30 on average. 3,500 divided by 30, that's 116 different lollies a day. And that's if you're working every day of the month. And you're at home as well. You're working from home. This could be dangerous. Bags of lollies arriving at your house.

And you're like, I can't. I have the sweetllies arriving at your house and you're like I can't you just you could I have the sweetest tooth but even me by the end of the day would be like I don't want to

taste another lolly well apparently it's had already 200 applicants so there's serious competition for the roll would you put it in your mouth

could you chew it and spit it out like you know like wine tasters they don't taste all the wine, do they? But sometimes, no, they do, they've got a bucket, you're right. Sometimes, you know, a lot of lollies have like a laxative

effect and you want to know that. So if you're spitting it out, you're not getting the true full experience of eating that lolly. You don't want to rate a lolly highly if it's got a laxative effect. Yeah, I know, because everyone would be like I'm going to hoon like 50 of those. Yum. Well, if you want the job, Canada.

Canada is the place to be. I love lollies so much. But? But I don't want to die. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. We all know that a good holiday, escaping the daily grind, does wonders for the mind, the stress levels, the skin. I've been a dry mess since I came back from Bali,

but in Bali, it's gorgeous. You had a bit of humidity. Humidity in the skin. But it also does wonders, apparently, for our libidos. We get all horned up when we're away from the household. They did a survey and it turns out that people are having twice as much coitus as when they're at home, when they're on holiday. Yeah, but you've got more time, don't you?

Do you think it's that? Yeah, you also don't have like the shit of life. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Like just following you around. The daily mundaneness of life. Just the dishes and the cold and the washing. And for some people, the kids wouldn't be there on holiday? Oh my God, if I ever have kids, if I ever have kids,

they will never go on holiday with me. My parents can take them away on like a lovely fun holiday, but they're never go on holiday with me. My parents can take them away on like a lovely fun holiday, but they're not ruining my holiday. Did your parents leave you behind when they went on holidays? No. But they really loved me. No, but I saw

so many people when I was in Bali recently. I saw so many families with their kids on holiday. And you were like, yuck. I was just like, that doesn't look fun, man. No. We went to like one of those water parks and there wasn't one kid who was spewing on the side and then the

dad had to like come and walk away from the thing. The dad just wanted to go down the slide. He just wanted to have some fun at the water park. Yeah. Water bomb. Yeah, water bomb. The kids spewing and one of the kids is crying because he's scared. See, if they'd left the kids at home... They'd be straight up banging.

They'd be going down the slide and then banging. Yeah. So, yeah, we're having twice as much sex on holiday as we are at home. And we're also more adventurous. So we're more likely to try new things. On holiday. 56% of travellers enjoy having open-air sex.

Like outside. Like on the veranda, on the patio of your Bali villa. I was travelling with friends as well. I wasn't saying you. Panky, panky. You did, you said your. Your Bali villa. So 56% of people outside as opposed to 14% of people when they're at home.

Right. Well, you don't want your neighbours seeing. You have to see your neighbours every day. I know. Good day, Dave. Yeah, exactly. Oh, yeah. Whereas your neighbours at your holiday accommodation,

you're never going to see again in your life. Yeah, exactly. So they asked people, they asked people like where on holiday they like to do it and there's a list. Okay. On the beach was the top.

What is this little fruit fly? Like a fruit fly. We've got a fruit fly. It's you. It's you and your sacks of fruit that you bring into work. You've got a kiwi fruit? Every day.

Yeah, but this is a new thing for me. We need like a bug spray. No, I'm going to catch with my bare ass hands. Okay, so the top a new thing for me. We need like a bug spray. No, I'm going to catch it with my bare ass hands. Okay, so the top places. On the beach. No, missed it. No.

On the beach. Somewhere with a beautiful vista. Okay. A field. A field? No, no, snakes. Especially if you're overseas. Mice and snakes.

And a lot of the fields in Bali are like rice paddies. They're like soggy and full of water. Yeah, no, no, no. Snakes. They're full of snakes. Public space, like a park. That's illegal. Yeah, yeah.

I don't know. In the pool or the sea. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no. I'm just thinking about all the pools that I shared when I was over there. Next to a river or lake. Up a mountain. Oh, okay.

On the rocks. It gets cold the higher you go. It gets cold the higher you go. But that makes sense. You warm up. Yeah, true. Be a skim. It sounds cold. It gets cold the higher you go. It gets cold the higher you go. But that makes sense. You warm up. Yeah, true. Be a skim. On a balcony.

That's cute. In a nightclub or a public toilet. What? Hang on. This is a survey done in the UK, isn't it? Yeah, it's British. Yeah. Yeah, they love a little pub shag.

Yeah, that's it. And then the final one on that list is the Mile High Club. On the plane. Outrageous. I can barely fit in there by myself. Especially on like, if this is done in the UK, any of those flights are between, what, three to five hours? Yeah.

Don't do it. There's no time or space to do that. I also just get so nervous that that toilet's going to suck me out of it. I know, it really does. They do suck, eh? Well, maybe good if that's what you're doing in the bathroom. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley.

Fletchvorn and Hayley Silly little pole Silly little pole It is so silly, silly, silly That the silly little pole Silly Little Pole, Silly Little Pole, it is so silly, silly, silly that the Silly Little Pole, Silly Little Pole, Silly Little Pole, Silly Little Pole, Silly Little Pole. Today's Silly Little Pole. Pineapple on pizza? Question mark?

This is a hot debate. Yes, I feel like if it's a Hawaiian pizza, yes. With the ham. With the ham, but everything else, no? I never really go for a Hawaiian. Do you know what I mean? Like, if I was ordering pizza from somewhere and the Hawaiian was on the menu, I wouldn't order it.

Yeah, I would never order it. If I was at a function or someone's party and they had it, I'd eat it. Yeah, and I'd be like, yum, that's yum. Though the other day, like I often make wrap pizzas. You get a wrap and you make it into a pizza. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But then don't wraps go like real hard? Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're trash.

They're trash. You've got what you've got. And there was like nothing in the fridge to put on them. I think I had some ham, maybe like an old shriveled capsicum and that was kind of it. And then I was like, oh, I've got a tin of pineapples in the pantry. So I did cut it up and it was... It was yum. It was absolutely fine.

It was fine. It was fine. Yeah. So I voted yes, pineapple on pizza. Okay. But not all pizza. Right. And the majority agrees with me. This is shocking to me, actually, these stats.

Yeah, I thought it would be a lot less, but people love pineapple on pizza. 70% of people said yes, and 30% said, ooh, no. So that's a whopping win. That's a resounding yes from the public. Some messages in. Hannah says, you're a heathen if you don't like pineapple on pizza. This is the hill I will die on. Hannah's passionate about it.

I'd rather die on that hill than an anti-vax hill. Yeah, me too. Me too. Less it's food. More chances of dying on an anti-vax hill. Yeah. Stephanie says, I used to hate it, but then I craved it when I was pregnant, and now I like it. Oh, okay.

Pineapple's quite a popular pregnancy craving food. I wonder why. Laura says horrid. Makes the pizza soggy. But there's lots of soggy things in a pizza. The sauce. I mean, if you're not draining the tinned pineapple, then yes. Oh yeah, you don't pour

a tin and juice. I think you're doing it wrong, Han. Yeah, Laura, I think that's on you. Moana says, 100% yes. People that don't like it think they have a degree in maturity, lol. Says the girl who says lol. Lucy, my friends think I'm an idiot

for picking it off and not just ordering ham and cheese, but I like the essence of pineapple. The sweetness lingering rather than a full chunk of it trying to eat your mouth back. So Lucy just likes, you should just get drops. Pineapple essence drops. Yeah, pineapple.

Yeah, juice. Emma says it's so good. Spaghetti. Oh, my God. Who are you? What was it? Bill English, wasn't it? Yeah, Bill English once made the pizza.

And I think that cost him the election, to be honest. Emma says, so good. Spaghetti, ham, cheese and pineapple with a sprinkle of mixed herbs on top. Delish. Yeah, that sounds like a real high school cooking class. It sounds like such. I think we made those like mousetraps or something. That is such a post

high school meal. Yeah. And finally Trina says it's a fruit. Fruit goes in a fruit salad, not on pizza. Some passionate responses. What about, like, I love a cranberry, chicken cranberry. Yeah, me too. Chicken cranberry brie. That's good, yeah.

Like a chicken apricot. Yeah, yep. So it can work. Pineapple's really no different. It's sweet as well. I like a salami banana. A what? I like a salami banana. Okay what? I like a salami banana.

Okay, yeah. I love a... I have had nectarine on a pizza. Oh, a pear on a pizza. Blue cheese, pear, walnut. Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, that would go well. Fruit belongs...

Although it sounds like you're getting more into salad territory now. No, no, no, no. With like a white base. Yeah, okay. Okay. Well, the nation has spoken.

I love strawberries on. Strawberries and ham. Raspberry pizza. Yeah. Raspberry and sausage. Although, have you ever done like a banana and like chocolate, like a dessert pizza? I haven't because I have more respect for myself and I just order the ice cream. I get it. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley.

Play ZM. Well, a bar on the West Coast in Hokitika has courted some controversy. They certainly have. I've been to the West Coast a few times. I've been to Hokitika a couple of times for the Wild Food Festival. Yes, beautiful. I love it there. Yeah, great people.

It is sometimes I will say it is a bit like when you come from like, you know, the big city. It's a bit like you've stepped back in time a little bit in terms of attitudes. Yeah. And outlooks and perspectives. Not everybody. I will say not everybody, but sometimes. Maybe they need a little bit more exposure. Maybe we need to get the Pride Festival going down there or something, you know? Oh, maybe. Yeah, maybe.

Well, the Stumpets Bar, the advert that has courted controversy, is an ad for staff. And it seems like everywhere you go now, like any store you walk into, there's an ad on the front for staff. Everywhere. Because everywhere is struggling. Yeah.

Understaffed. Because they had also a lot of places like fired people at the top of the pandemic. And now that things are kind of back, they're like, oh, we need the staff again. Well, yeah. And people can get better money doing other stuff as well. Yeah, so they're gone. Because people are so desperate for staff in other industries. So this ad that was on the front window was snapped and sent around pretty quickly on social media yesterday. It says, wanted.

Part-time bar staff, apply within, must have double D breasts, a great smile, a good attitude, but men can also apply. Do the men have to have double D breasts? I think they have to have at least a C. A C cup, sure. At least a C. Or maybe X amount of inches. I don't know. Yeah, maybe are they going to measure that as well?

That's what people have pointed out when this ad has done the rounds. It's like, well, would it be all right for you to say men must have at least so many inches? Or be well endowed to have this job? So what? It's weird that they started with the double dicks. So a lot of people are saying, because people have now gone into two camps, some are like, this is outrageous. You cannot do this.

No. It is 2022. Yeah. Would you want people leering at your daughter if she was working there? And it's not like it's a strip club. It's not like... No, it's just a bar.

It's just a bar. A bar and hotel, yeah. You definitely can't do this. And then other people are saying, well, it's just a joke. A bar and hotel, yeah. You definitely can't do this. And then other people are saying, well, it's just a joke. Doesn't sound like a joke. Where's the joke? It's just a joke.

Double D boobies. I mean, you just can't do that now, can you? I remember I have been to Hooters once in the United States. Oh, right, yeah, yeah, yeah. In LA. It's amazing that that's even allowed to be a thing still, right? Still, I know. They've got the little booty shorts,

and I'm sure when they apply for the job, there's got to be some kind of similar wording about their assets. But I watched a video once on how the Hooters girls get the appearance of a double D, even if they're rocking a B. Oh, right, okay. They did a tip, and they taped them up and hoisted all together, and then they give the appearance. Just to work a shift.

I know. Imagine how uncomfortable. Has anyone applied? Well, no. I'm out. I don't know. I don't know. I'm smaller in the chest.

But yeah, there's a lot of uproar about it. The Ministry of Business, Innovation and Employment told the Herald that the ad was in breach of the Human Rights Act 1993. Yeah, it feels like it. Because you're not allowed to publish a job that could discriminate, basically. And that is discriminating. Against little boobies. Little boobies. Yeah.

Yeah, basically. I'm allowed to say that. I've got little boobies. You're allowed to say that, yeah. I'm allowed to say that. But so men can apply. Men can apply. I'm guessing if you've got big boobs

the men have to have the men have to have the double D's the women have to have the double D's yeah so well I mean if you're looking for a hospital job

the lovely rugged west coast it's so beautiful have they responded at all the bar you know because as you said

Stumpers this is the last line of the article Stumpers told the Herald today they did not wish to comment. Of course they don't. But if it was a joke, you would. So there goes your joke theory.

They want the double Ds. Bonus Banger. All right, it's your chance to win cash. After nine o'clock this morning, the Bonus Banger is back. This is a song you've got to be listening out for after nine to win $500. Beyonce, first caller through when this plays after nine,

you win the cash. I wonder what started this trend online. But, oh God, I can hear that. You can hear in my mouth that I've had too many boogert rings in the online. But, oh, God, I can hear that. You can hear in my mouth that I've had too many booger rings in the break. You can hear. You can.

I'm going to swill the mouth. In that one song. How long was that song? We've hooned half a bag. We've hooned half a bag of booger rings. Anyway, so there's that secret telling app, Whisper. Oh, yeah. You know, where you go on and you make anonymous confessions.

And they're just like statements and people can read them and be like, oh, my God. Like that post-secret, that art project that started years ago. Oh, my God, I bought the book. Yeah, it's still going. Oh, my God, I bought the book of that. And it was like, yeah, people posting in postcards with their secrets on them. It was amazing. Anyway, so this is that app,

and people have been sharing the real and shocking reasons that they are still in their relationship, even though, you know, the relationship shouldn't really continue. Now, these have been strictly from men, but we'll come back to that. Right. So some of them are wild. Okay, give me some examples. The only reason I'm still with my girlfriend

is because I don't want to disappoint my grandma. Grandma loves the gal. That's not a reason to be in a relationship. The only reason I'm with my girlfriend is because she has an awesome dog. You love the dog. You can't leave the dog. I'm only with my girlfriend because she buys me stuff.

You've got a sugar mama there. Yeah. I'm only with my girlfriend for her mum's money when she dies. That's terrible. I'm only with my girlfriend because I'm hiding the fact that I'm in love with my best friend. I like that one. Oh, that's juicy. Honestly, I'm only with my girlfriend because

she's my ride for practice after school. Get a license! That's terrible. I think the only reason I'm still with my girlfriend is because I would be so bored if we broke up. I'm only with my

girlfriend to make her happy. She's never been in a relationship and I don't want it but she does. I'm only with my girlfriend to make her happy. She's never been in a relationship and I don't want it, but she does. Oh, I'm only with my girlfriend until my ex wants me back. I'm only with my girlfriend because I don't want to be homeless. I'm only with my girlfriend because her family really likes me. I mean, it just goes on. There's so, so many. So many.

Some people are like quite aghast at some of these. This is the last one and this is absolutely terrible. I'm not standing by this. But it made me giggle. I'm only with my girlfriend because of her looks and body. She's got the personality of a piece of plywood. Get out. Get out.

Get out, yeah. Anyway, we thought we would dare to ask if you would ring or text anonymously. Yeah. And share the real reason that you're still with your partner. Now, when we were discussing this this morning, Producer Jared, you confessed the real reason you're with your middy. Is it free dental care?

No. Did she give you the free dentistry? No. Did she give you a clean at home? No, she's not qualified to do that. Oh, bugger. She can't just get you in on the weekends? What on earth is keeping you with this lady?

I'm just generally quite useless. Yeah. And without her, I just probably wouldn't do a lot of things. And also, she gets me out the house on the weekends. Yeah, I was going to say, if you didn't have a girlfriend, you would never leave the house. So you're looking for a secondary mother is what I'm hearing here. No, no, no, no.

I don't need mothering. To mummy you. I just need someone to be like, all right, maybe get off the PlayStation real quick. That's what mums do. That's what mums do. Mums do it with a tone. Emma does it supportively.

Oh, okay. Mums yell, whereas your girlfriend's a bit more supportive. Is that it? Oh, right, okay. Please get off me. Okay, producer Anna, do you have one of these? Safe space. Safe space?

Safe space. He's very good at fetching things. Yeah, great. Like the minute I get into bed and I'm like, God, I'm absolutely parched. I could really do with a glass of water. The man gets you some water. I will say he is consistently good at fetching.

So if you were to break up, you'd have to get out of bed and get water. And it's just not for me. It's just not for you? No. So you've got a servant. Right, okay. Carween? I just really love my boyfriend

Yuck Get out His mum listens guys, I can't say it Me and Aaron are just too bogged down in admin Well that's Vaughn who's away sick today That's his strategy as well Bog them down with admin

It's too hard to leave I can't be bothered. Do you know what I mean? I just can't be bothered. And also, I'm tall. So I need a tall one. And I got the tallest one.

Yeah, right. Okay, so you're with him because he's tall. Tall and, God, we just, it's so much paperwork. You know? Okay, well,

this is what we want to ask you this morning and we want you to call. You can do it anonymously. 0800-DANCE-AT-HEM or text in 969. It's a little tongue-in-cheek, obviously. 9696.

Yeah, maybe if you are after her inheritance money, we probably don't need to hear those calls. Although, happy to hear them. Yeah. Like, they're quite juicy. But what is the real reason you're with your partner? The real reason. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn, and Hayley.

We're talking about the real reason. The real actual reason that you're with your partner. People have been sharing anonymously online on Whisper the real reason they're with their partner. And people are like, what? Anything from inheritance to... The dog? Just the dog?

She's got a good dog. Yeah. Get on with the dog. So obviously we're getting a lot of anonymous messages in. Yeah, quite a lot. I don't even know where to start. Hang on, people are still talking about the double Ds. Yeah, I only stayed with my ex for as long as they did

because I didn't want to leave our shared dog. Right. I'm going to say it. Someone texts in because of that D. That's the real reason they're with their partner. Yep, okay. I'm only with my partner still because he's a great cook and I can't cook and I'll get hungry.

Right. Somebody said just to have someone to do things with, companionship rather than love. Yeah, it is lonely out there. I'm only with my girlfriend because we got married. I mean, that'll do it. Somebody said he already owned his own home at 21 with no help from his parents. Good job and responsible.

Well, that's just a keeper, isn't it? That's your way into the housing market. I'm only with my passport, anonymous, don't worry. I'm only with her because that black passport. Really? I want the Kiwi passport because my blue passport is just not good enough. Wow. There's another New Zealand citizenship.

I'm only with my boyfriend because he's a mechanic. He fixes my car for free. Oh, yeah, for the kids. That's cute. Maybe because I've got three children with him. All right, we'll keep your texts coming in. 0800 DALES.M You can call as well, 0800 DALES.M

And we'll keep it anonymous. Although most people just want it to be anonymous. Some of these are outrageous and I'm obviously skipping over the terrible ones. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. So we want to know the real reason, the real reason you're with your partner. People anonymously sharing theirs through the Whisper app.

It's kind of taken off online. Someone's come at me. They've said Hayley's with her lad only because he's Greg Grover from Nova and my girlfriend thinks he's a total catch. He is a total catch though, isn't he? He is a total catch. Greg Grover is the nerdiest version of Aaron. It's so funny.

They cut his hair all short and stuff. So if you like him like that, you should see him. You should see him in winter, mate. He grows it all out. He lets it grow out. Let's go to Anonymous who has called up Anonymous. What's the real reason you're with your partner? Good morning.

Good morning. So we got together as sort of a Heidi Flirty thing. He had a partner at the time. Yeah. And yeah, he left her for me and I kind of keep him as a trophy to prove that I can get what I want.

What? I love that. I love that. I love that. Yeah, yeah. Why not? Why not? And that's the real reason. Yeah, absolutely.

I mean... But when you accomplished this, you weren't like, oh, well, next, I've done that. You're like, no, I've got to keep this as a trophy for as long as I can now. Yeah, absolutely.

Yeah, right, okay. Yeah, I'm not a quitter, you know. Yeah. Amazing, Anonymous. Thank you. Another anonymous caller. Anonymous,

what's the real reason you're with your partner? Good morning. Good morning. My favourite show. Oh, thank you. Oh, my favourite caller. Is that worth a ding?

Yeah, we'll ding it. Ding, ding. Thank you, thank you. So, this is an ex-partner. We were together for about three years. And after, I'd say, I'd say a year. After a year, I realised that the relationship just wasn't for me. Oh, yeah.

You really stuck in there. There's a good reason. So I was vegan at the time. His whole family was vegan. Yeah. And so we had vegan Christmases. Wait, you stayed with someone for vegan Christmases? You stayed for Christmas lunch?

Well, and there was a wedding coming up. And was it a vegan wedding? Yes. Right, so you wanted to exceed it. You stayed for the cuisine. So, like, we lived together. We shared heaps of friends. Right. So you wanted to exceed it. You stayed for the cuisine. So, like, we lived together. We shared heaps of friends. Right.

Obviously, it wasn't the number one reason I stayed, but it was a very, very big reason for me to hang in this relationship with a vegan Christmas. Because that would be the hardest thing about being a vegan would be all the food prep. Yeah, totally. It's just easier. Yeah, yeah.

See, that's a little bit in the admin territory. Exactly. And when I have Christmas with my family, I get boiled potatoes and roast potatoes sometimes. Yeah. And they'll go and buy you one of those horrid vegan meat patties or something. Oh, no. They wouldn't even do that. They wouldn't even do that.

Oh, God. Anonymous, thank you for sharing some messages to finish up. So many, too. So many. I know. The real reason I'm with my boyfriend is because I get home from a 12-hour shift to a hot-cooked yummy meal. Oh, that's nice.

A lot of people doing it for the kids. Yep. A lot of people doing it for the warmth in winter. Okay. Just get a heater. I would say a lot of people doing it for the visa. Really? So many messages in like,

she keeps me in the country, basically. So I've got to stay. My girlfriend tolerates me and I would never give that up. So just staying because you think that no one else would be able to handle you. Yeah, nice. I can't leave my partner because he's just so handy.

He can fix things. If you need something, he makes it. He can build a fence. I save so much money not having to pay tradies. Oh, that sounds great. And then before you know it, you're 80. I'm only with my girlfriend because it's my hand and it's attached to me. You're rude.

I'm Asian, five foot, black hair and dark brown eyes. My partner is six foot with blonde and blue eyes. I'm only with him because I wanted dark haired children with blue eyes. Joke's on me. All of our children have light hair and brown eyes. And I'm only with my boyfriend as it's easier as we have a 14 month lease that hasn't run out yet. So what happens when the lease runs out? Oh, someone.

I'm only with my boyfriend because his family won the $14 million in lotto. I had to stick around to see if any of it's for me, right? We've been doing all this late night talking. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Are you alright? Yeah, I'm just measuring my ring I told you I'm doing a little bit of online shopping

and I just want to see what ring size I am How do you measure the ring? Well, I can't remember what size this ring is but then you can measure the internal Oh, with a ruler, right The internal diameter of it and work out what size In millimetres In millimetres.

In millimetres. Now that to me looks 15, 16, like a 17. The ring that I'm looking at is not going to be big enough. Right. You ram rated

and you got a two bigger ring. Is that what happened? And I feel bad going back to Michael Hill Jewellery and being like, can I get these resized? Because you ram rated them in the first place.

Because I ram rated them in the first place. Does that come as a free service if you do that? This time tomorrow we're going to be very excited Because we're announcing Friday Jemay's Live Friday Jams Live is back It'll be in November

We will give you the date We will tell you the line up And we know the line up Honestly thank god we're doing this I can't sit on this for much longer It's very exciting So we'll reveal everything tomorrow I can't sit on this for much longer. I know. Yeah, it's very exciting. So we'll reveal everything tomorrow.

You can win the first tickets. We'll tell you how you can buy the tickets, what date, because a lot of people will need to book flights as well, accommodation. We've been doing bangers bingo, and I've been hearing a lot of the artists that are coming to Friday Jams playing. Because the artists that are coming do strictly bangers. Bangers. Bangers. Bangers.com. Yeah. Actually, don't go to that. coming do strictly bangers. Bangers. Bangers. Bangers.com.

Yeah. Actually, don't go to that. That might be something else. Just on second thought. Please don't go. We need to talk now on the show about something that has been coined, a term that's been coined, quiet quitting. Yeah, I was reading about this as well.

And I reckon there's a guilty quiet quitter amongst us. Really? Maybe not today. I'd say there'd be a quiet quitter at most workplaces. Yeah. So the term is you're not outright quitting your job. Yes. If you're quiet quitting, it's the idea of going above and beyond at work

is just you're just not doing that. You're just pulling back a bit. Yeah. So maybe there would be overtime that isn't paid that you might have normally done, like if something needed to be done, but then it gets to five o'clock and you're like, you know what, it's five o'clock.

That can be done tomorrow. Yeah, and I think when I was reading this, the outcome of it is like nothing, essentially. So the outcome is that you are less stressed, you're more relaxed, you're less kind of spread thin in your job, but all of your jobs are still getting done and no one cares.

It's like the anti-hustle culture. Well, somebody replying to this said that they quite quit six months ago and they get the same recognition, the same pay, but they're just less stressed and way more happier. Yeah. It's almost like an unnoticeable thing, but it'll make a huge difference to your life. So if you're like running this major company or you're under the thumb of a really like tyrannical boss and you're exhausted and you're like heading head first for a bloody mental breakdown. Yeah.

Just try the quiet quit. The quiet quit. Which is like, what are the jobs I need? What's the time I'm given to achieve that job? You still do what you're meant to do. Do the job. You just don't go above and beyond. No, because people aren't going above and beyond and they're getting paid the same as you and probably getting as much work done as well.

Although there will be bosses listening right now that are like, what are you doing? Stop, stop talking. Shut up. What do you know? You just talk for a living. I don't know how we on air would quiet quit. Yeah, it'd be very hard to.

Do you know what I mean? Because you would sort of notice. If you pulled back. Yeah. I mean, it's more your office jobs. Yeah. Have you quiet quit in the last 10 seconds? No.

Yep, I see what you've done there. You just, yeah. Doesn't work the same, does it? No. I'll just go like this. Hey guys, I read an article. It says that 50% of people do this. All right, next on the show, Julie.

That would be it. That would be the radio version of Quiet Quitting. Yeah, it would be. And I think our audience would audibly quit us. They probably would. Vaughn's not sick today with the man flu. He is. Not COVID.

Yeah, he is. We want to talk about one of my favourite shows of all time. If you haven't watched it, you must. Old People's Home for Four Year Olds. Producer Anna, you also love this show as well. It's honestly the most

wholesome thing possibly ever made. It's so good. For those that don't know what's it, give us the synopsis. So it's an experiment conducted in Australia. The ABC do this show, yeah. Yeah, and it is a group of old people and a group of four-year-olds, and every day they spend, I don't know, it kind of looks like half a day together,

and they learn from each other. Right. And the main thing around it is to combat loneliness in old people, which is huge and actually a massive problem. And so these kids come in, Ayanna, you know, and they just brighten the old people's lives. And the old people are teaching the young people so much about the world and it's just a it's a beautiful interaction in every single episode i'd cry just chew their ear off about

war stories what do they do what kind of it's i reckon it's more the little kids bringing the old people out of their shell right because the they do these tests on the elderly and they have an elderly depression scale and all of them are quite high on it. And it's so devastating because basically they're like you know, like my body doesn't work like it used to. I'm alone. I don't really see that many people. See my family maybe once a week and that's

my life. And so these young people just like brighten their, oh my god, I'm so emotional even just thinking about it. But every episode me and Aaron would sit there and be like, what can we do? What can we do? And we started looking up our local

old folks homes so we could go and spend time with old people we don't know. I don't want you turning up. I know but I don't have a child. I don't have a fun child to be like off you go. Anyway, so they've got two seasons, I think, online. I've watched them both. Yeah. And

now a third season is out. And the moment I saw this, I was like, I'm so excited. I'm ready to cry. You should watch this, Fletch. I think you need a good cry. Okay. But they're doing a twist. This year, it's old folks home for teenagers.

Will they be moody, can't be bothered teenagers? I hate teenagers. I hated being a teenager. Yeah, you hate them. I hate them now. But what kind of teenage, will they be those teenagers, you know, we're on the student council and have like 10 badges and, you know, involved in the community teenagers or

will they be like yeah prefect or be like goth teenagers like me like you that don't want to borrow people um if i watch the trailer i think there's a pretty diverse range of teenagers right like really outgoing to really really shy um you, one teenager who gets bullied and is like, doesn't have a lot of friends. So I can imagine this is still going to be a very emotional show. Oh, I think it's still going to make you cry. But the kids, they're so dumb. They don't know anything, you know, and they're just so innocent

and like outgoing. Whereas like teenage years is where you're like, don't talk to me. Yeah. I don't know. I'm a little bummed that they're not doing the one with the kids. Okay. Well, maybe just see how, because I mean, they've done a great job the first two seasons.

So it might make you cry as well. You did say earlier today with the fog outside, feels like a day to sit inside and do nothing. You need to go on the couch and have a good cry all afternoon watching this show. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Well, today with Vaughn away, I have found a fact of the day. You're a bit tickled by it.

I found this and it's such a fascinating story. Hit me, hit me. I don't remember this happening in 2006. First, though, before I give you the fact of the day and the story behind today's fact of the day, I would like you now, Hayley, I'm going to turn around and show you a photo of a lady, a woman called Susan Kun Hansen. I just want you to describe for the listeners what she looks like,

how you would describe this lady. Like a very motherly, elderly woman. Almost Mrs. Doubtfire, right? Very Mrs. Doubtfire. She's got the Mrs. Doubtfire kind of cardigan. Kind of like an older, poorer Kathy Bates. She was 51 when this happened. So Susan had just finished at the Portland Medical Center.

She's an emergency room nurse. She headed home to her home. She got home and found a note from her husband of 18 years, Michael, saying that he'd left for the beach. The date was the 6th of September, 2006. So Susan walked up to her shared bedroom when a man hiding behind the door jumped out and attacked her with a claw hammer.

What? Hiding behind the door was a hitman called Edward Haffey, who was a longtime criminal. And he had been paid $50,000 by Susan's husband to kill her in a murder for hire plot. Oh, this sounds like the podcast I was listening to this morning. It does. This would be a great. And you know what?

I'm sure it is an episode of a podcast somewhere. So he managed to land a blow to her head with the hammer. But she's an emergency room nurse. She was well-versed in effective self-defense skills. She's having to deal with, you know, meth heads lashing out and stuff. And she launched into action and she tackled the hitman and pushed him against a wall. It was at that moment that she heard the hitman say the words, oh, you're strong.

And yes, girl. And she wrestled the hammer away and hit the man a few times in the head and demanded to know why he was there, saying, who sent you? And the hitman didn't respond respond wrestled the hammer back that's when she grabbed his throat and squeezed and said to the hitman tell me who sent you here and i will call you an effing ambulance i adore this woman she didn't say anything and she strangled him to death. Oh, okay. Okay. Wow. She got carried away. Yeah, she's actually recounted this like on television shows before

and her husband has pled guilty in 2007, pled guilty and sentenced to seven years in prison. To be fair, and I know it's a very murky line, a muddy line, but that is complete self-defense. The man was going to kill her. Yeah. Yeah.

If you look at this woman, what's her name again? Susan. Susan. Doesn't look like it, does she? If you look at Susan, I cannot imagine her self-defensing, getting the hammer, grabbing his throat box and saying, tell me who sent you. It's an incredible story to read up about because she just looks like,

just like, you know, a 51-year-old lady, a little old lady that looks harmless. Any information, so she kills the guy and then obviously the police come around, da-da-da-da. Is there any information on like when the husband came back

and then was like, why are you not dead? Well, I don't, I don't. I think, yeah, I think the police like worked it out and then was like, why are you not dead? Why don't, I don't, I think, yeah, I think the police like worked it out and he was pretty quickly arrested, yeah. Because there was evidence and stuff in his possession that linked him to the husband. So, yeah, today's fact of the day. In 2006, a man in Portland hired a hitman to kill his wife, Susan. She ended up killing the hitman with her bare hands.

Amazing. Yeah, so is that a bit grim for Fact of the Day? I think we should do like Grim Fact of the Day. Like a warning? We should do a true crime podcast. That's a great fact. It's a flooded market. Fact of the Day, Day, day, day, day.

Two very tumultuous flights, actually. Flying into Christchurch was one thing, and then flying out of Christchurch was another. Yeah, hitting the Alps, you know, the air gets a bit turbulent. Yeah. And I love turbulence. I get so excited. It's like a free fairground ride.

It is. It's like a free rollercoaster. Whee! Woo! And then you see people start freaking out and that just makes me... Is that bad that I like that? You just look at the flight attendants and then if they're fine,

which they were, you're fine. Yeah, exactly. But this was what was happening in row one and two. Fletcher and I up the front. I mean, season travellers. Season travellers. Leg room. Oh, extra leg room. Extra leg room. It's gorgeous. But at the back in Rome They gave us champagne

37 or something Yeah I will say 13 Okay It did seem like they were Upper mid Upper mid Let's not call it upper mid class

But back in Yeah back in Economy was it Seat only Back in seat only What's it like there What's it like there You were having a different experience.

Yes, yes. I was sitting next to a beautiful couple. Very light chat at the start. How old? Light chat in the middle. 70s. Oh, gorgeous. Yeah, beautiful chit chat.

And then as the plane started rumbling, tumbling around, I don't know what, 20 minutes to landing, I look out the corner of my eye, I pause my Lizzo, and I see and hear. You pause your Lizzo. I was like, if anyone's going to get me through this, it'll be Lizzo. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wouldn't that agitate your? You need soothing. You need Enya. You need soothing music. And I was like, am I ready? And it really got me going. To die. Yeah.

And I saw that they were actually really in quite a tight embrace and praying. Oh, bless them. Yeah. And I was a bit scared, so I always wanted to be like, yoo-hoo, room for one more. You wanted to get in on their prayer because you thought we were plummeting to our death. Yeah. Also, if we were plummeting to our death. Yeah, I'm a very anxious person. Also, if we were plummeting to our death,

I reckon too little too late. You're hoping that you can live a life of a heathen, as I am. I'm not, you know, pointing fingers here. But then in the moments before you potentially die, you're like, I'll chuck a prayer in for good luck. I'll give it an absolute hoon. Why not?

Yeah, but why, like, why did he make the plane crash? Let's not get into the greater workings of how people that believe in God believe God works. Right, yeah. It's very complex. Yeah. So you were so afraid in this moment that it drove you to Jesus. I saw them and I thought, oh, okay.

And then I thought, hmm, now that's not a bad call. So, okay, say the engine was on fire. Here's another, here's a hypothetical. The engine's on fire. Yep. You're at 30,000 feet. You're coming back from Australia. Oh, nice.

And the plane's like. Where have you been? That's beside the point. Do I have shopping in the bag? You've been on the lovely Goldie. You've been on the lovely Goldie. The plane's engine's on fire. Everyone's screaming.

Yeah. You're plummeting to the ground. At that point, being not religious at all, do you pray? Now. Because I don't think I would. I'd just be like, well, this is it. And there's no phone reception. I can't even record a message for one news.

Hang on. Hang on. hang on. There's bigger things at play here. If you were about to die, you're thinking I'm going to record a message for One News. A voice message for your family saying I love you. Yeah, but that's for your family. No, but they would send it to One News. Not Simon Dallow. Simon Dallow, let me give you

the blow by blow. Tell them to check if the fan blades were all intact. Yeah. I don't know that I would turn to prayer as this lovely older couple did. But I think in the moment

if you're going down you might put something out to the universe like please save me. Even though you haven't believed it your whole life you just do it just to see if it works.

What if I'm wrong? You know? Yeah? What if I'm wrong? You know? Yeah. What if I'm wrong? And then I get there at the pearly gates and he's like, you're lucky you chucked in that final prayer, Hayley Square. The only one of your life. The only one of your life.

And you come, babe. I'm like, was that all I had to do? And he's like, yeah, all the other stuff's like fluff. He just had to send me a little SOS. Right, okay, yeah, all the other stuff's like fluff. You just had to send me a little SOS. Right, okay, yeah, right. But we wanted to talk about these moments. What is the moment that turned you to Jesus? What is the moment that made you take up prayer?

Yeah, was there a moment where you thought the plane was going to crash or you just not being religious at all, you thought, I'm going to try, I'm going to try this. What is the moment that made you chuck in a quick prayer? I don't think we're going to get many calls on this. I feel like we're not a very religious country. We're not a very religious country. But then maybe that would make people do

these last minute, like, SOS's to Jesus. We're not a to Jesus. We're not a hugely outspoken religious. I think that we're a quiet religious country. Yeah. But I mean, this couple on the plane, but they were probably quite a religious couple.

Yeah, maybe. A different generation as well. But I have had those moments where you just do think... I'll just try it. I'll just try it. I'll just dip a toe for my convenience, giving nothing back to the community or the church. Yeah.

Just in case. It works. I die. It's wild. And I get to heaven. And God's there. Well, let's just try it. Hold my hand.

Hold my. Hold my hand. Hold my hand. I'll be right here. Hold my hand. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. So there was some prayer on the plane yesterday when we hit turbulence next to Anna in the cheap seats in row 13. Yeah, to be fair, it was bumpy.

It was bumpy. And we're talking about those times when, as a non-religious person, you just chuck a prayer to Jesus out there. You chuck a quick prayer to Jesus. And then you just hope that it'll work. Chucking a prayer to Jesus even if you don't believe

in him, it's not going to hurt. I think that's the moment we're going like, the situation is so dire, it's not going to hurt. I'll chuck a prayer Jesus' way. So you'd do it? I think I would do, I might not address it directly to Jesus, but I'm hoping it'll get to him.

Right. You know, I'm hoping it'll reach him. Right, okay. By a snail man. Well, there are some insane messages coming in. So many. So many. Kaya, good morning. Hi.

Now, what did you do? What happened? So, like, it wasn't like I'm literally going to die. It was more my mum's going to kill me. Oh, no. And you were like, Jesus, help me. Mum's going to kill me. Yeah.

So I lost my lunchbox. It's quite expensive. It's stainless steel. Oh. La-la-dee-da. How old were you when this happened? My dad drove me back to school, expensive at stainless steel. Oh, la-la-dee-da. How old were you when this happened? My dad drove me back to school and I was just looking around

literally everywhere and I couldn't find it. And so I was just like, Jesus, please, I know I'm not religious or anything, but I really need you to do me a solid here. Jesus, do me a solid. Help me find my poche lunchbox. Did he shine a light down from heaven to illuminate the lunchbox?

Yeah, I found it. Yeah, he did. Yes, he did. It worked. Yeah. And so you didn't get mum's wrath? Yeah. No.

As far as I'm concerned, she doesn't know. She doesn't know. I mean, having lost one school shoe as a kid, that was, I should have prayed maybe. You should have said a prayer. I just went out on lockdown and never found it. You should have reached out to Jesus. Some messages in, so many coming in. So many.

Someone was saying, have you ever heard the saying, there's no atheists in foxholes? So like everyone in the moment of danger turns to Jesus. Right. Is it because it's what they do in the movies when the planes are crashing? You're just like... Someone begged God once when they were waiting for the school bus as a 15-year-old and it turned up.

How do you explain that? It was going to come anyway? Another message says, I pray every time Lotto hits 20 million. I reckon if Jesus is out there granting prayers, I don't think he's out there granting that one. No. I parked at the train station and had a weird feeling, so I was like, prayers, I don't think he's out there granting that one. I parked at the train station and had a weird feeling,

so I was like, eh, I'll give it a go. Hey, God, please don't let my car be stolen today. And I got back to the car and it had been broken into and the guys had tried to hotwire it. But they weren't able to steal it. They weren't able to steal it. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Jesus.

Well, you know, they say to hairdressers, you should always avoid the topics of, like, politics, religion. Yeah. The local body elections. I think we've been a little heavy on all of these things, and we're going hard on religion at the moment. Because there was some prayer on the plane yesterday when we hit turbulence next to Producer Anna.

Look, we are having a bit of fun. We are. It's just that moment where if you aren't a religious person, you just think, I'll just chuck one out there. I'll just chuck a prayer to God. And if he answers me, he answers me. If he doesn't, no harm, no foul. Some amazing messages in.

Whenever you just chuck the prayer out there when you're not religious at all. Someone messaged in saying, I'm the opposite. The moment I dropped Jesus was when I was nine years old Because God didn't save My sick praying mantis Even with many prayers

So he was cut Jesus got the cut They don't last long anyway right? Are they like Mop? Stop it They're not They're not pets

No They're insects They're bugs aren't they? Dina, when did you chuck one out there? It was actually my son. My four-year-old son and I were playing snakes and ladders on the floor and he suddenly bowed as he closed his eyes and said, Dear Santa, please help me win.

Dear Santa! He went straight to Santa. He put a play out to Santa. Now, Santa's something I believe in deeply. Did he win snakes and ladders? You know what? Santa came through put a play out to Santa. Now, Santa's something I believe in deeply. Did he win Snakes and Landers? You know what? Santa came through for him. Santa came through.

There we go. There we go. Maybe next time, Anna, when you're on a bumpy flight, you could reach out to Santa because it sounds like he's listening. Dear Santa, please don't let me die. Dear Santa, please help me win the $20 million. Santa would deal with turbulence all the time, wouldn't he? Yeah, he would.

Oh, my God. Imagine the weather. Dina, thank you for your call. Let's go to Sarah. Sarah, when did you put a prayer out there as a non-religious person? When I was about 14, I used to get called surfboard at school because I was

pretty flat-chested. Me too. Mozzie bites. You went home one day and you're like, this is it. I'm going to pray. Yeah, definitely. And now I've got huge boobs, so I really regret it. Oh're like, this is it. I'm going to pray. Yeah, exactly. And now I've got huge boobs, so I really regret it. Oh, God, what a pain. So what did you say?

Dear God. I was just like, please, can I have boobs? I just wanted any boobs, not big ones, any. And now they're giant. Have you thought about a prayer for a reduction or is that going to need a surgery? Yeah, I need about $15,000 for that one. Oh, say a prayer. about a prayer for a reduction or is that going to need a surgery? Yeah, I need about 15 grand for that one. Say a prayer. Say a prayer.

Put one Santa's way. Yeah. I'll pray for Lotto. Yes, there you go. We'll send you thoughts and prayers. We will. Sarah, thanks. You called more messages in, some hilarious ones.

Some hilarious ones, some really touching ones as well. Yes, there are some touching ones. A couple of people who had, I had a baby at 28 weeks that almost died. Didn't die. She said it's the only time I've seen my husband pray. I would go, that's a moment you might chuck one Jesus' way. I had a heart attack in the ambulance on my way to hospital

when I'd been injured. I chucked a prayer God's way. They're alive. They're texting in. Well, I hope they're alive. I've been on the toilet before and had to say a little prayer to God. Just to get you moving. I prayed the night before my physics exam in my first year of university after neglecting to study.

I still failed. Couldn't even believe. Couldn't believe the prayer didn't work. A lot of people who were sick. I picked up prayer on a really rocky ferry ride in Bali. No one else seemed concerned, but I can't swim. So I was trying to get in the good books just in case. Oh, I got a golf ball-sized brain tumour diagnosed.

I prayed and made a deal or two. Yeah, you do. You're like, I'll give up swearing and being bitchy. Six years later, I'm still here and I haven't been to church yet. So she didn't fulfill her promise. I feel like you at least owe one visit or 10% of your wages to something. She said I do try to be a good human, so that's good. That's nice.

A couple of religious people not stoked we're doing this. Someone said, I don't pray to God because what if I get the wrong one? Oh, yeah. Many, many gods. Yeah, right. It's all a bit above me. I don't know how that works. A lot of people praying in board games.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yes. Two other people have texted in saying they prayed for boobs and now their boobs are too big and they can't handle them. Right, okay. So God's really answering the boob ones. Any of the other, the downstairs, any guys? Not that anyone's admitted to.

Because that could be a good idea. Give it a go. I could be wrong. Yeah. Every now and then, chuck one his way. See ya, see ya later. Actually, I'm going to have to stop you there. That's copyrighted.

Suzy Cato's a very good friend of mine. She's already sued me twice, so if you could maybe get her to drop her litigious action, that would be great. Tell her I'll review her five stars if she does the same for this podcast. And then she tells all her friends. And if you're listening, maybe give it five stars as well.

ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley.