ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Podcast - 9th May 2022

Episode Date: May 8, 2022

Social Break  Top 6: Driving DogTyre Extinguishers  Flirting Study  Don't Get Fletch Started!  Silly Little Poll!  Vaughans Mask  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Grab any size McCafe coffee for only $4. Conditions apply. I was thinking to myself this morning as I got dressed for work. I have made minimal effort today, but I'm feeling a bit sick, so that's...

You say... C'est la vie. You say minimal effort. That's what Vaughan and I wear every day, just T-shirts. I'm wearing jeans and T-shirt. Yes. That's my base effort.

But I was looking at my wardrobe as I was getting ready and I was thinking to myself, and this is selfishly, when's winter coming? Because, I mean, this is from Auckland, obviously. I know it's getting colder. But I think global warming, while it's doing a lot of things,

it's also ruining fashion. Because you love your winter coats. I love winter fashion. I love to layer. Yeah. I love a scarf. I love a coat. Yeah.

I love a boot. Well, I know last week there was an article for New Zealand anyway that winter's kind of off a month. It's been delayed because of the warm ocean. I just don't feel like it's going to come. We've been lighting the fire for more of the romanticism of it at night. You've been sweating. You don't need it.

And then hot. So we're sitting there in like shorts and t-shirts like, God, get that fire off. It's boiling in here. You've been emitting burning wood when you don't need to. But it's romantic. Oh, right. Okay, yeah.

So I'm contributing to the climate change, which is delaying the winter, which is making my fire too hot and my fashion out of bloody kilter. So it's your fault. So it is my fault. But man, I've got some lovely coats.

Wait till you see them. You've never seen them. We've never seen them. I love a coat. I love a winter coat, yeah. I've got a couple of wools. Beanie again today. I love a beanie season. I'm a coat. I love a winter coat, yeah. I've got a couple of wools. Beanie again today. I love a beanie season.

I'm a big boots guy. Jeans I find very comfortable. Yeah. Yeah, I think winter is my preferred fashion time. Okay, well, so hang in there. I don't know. I even went and bought some bigger jeans because, as I have mentioned before, my last year's winter jeans don't fit anymore.

No, you're not spinning that right. So I've bought the same jeans but the next size up. Right. What you should say is baggy jeans are in fashion. So I've gone for the baggy ones. But they're not baggy because they fit the same, but they're just a size up because my body's a size up. Yeah, right.

But they're not comfortable. I'm talking, you know, I bought a cute little woolen mini skirt. I'm thinking tights and a little woolen jacket on top Yeah right, shiver me timbers I've got fashion prepared and ready to go but it's If we could just drop another 10 degrees maybe Thanks Rachel, good morning, welcome to the, Fleach, Fawn and Hayley. Happy Monday.

Happy Monday and happy Mum Day. Mum Day, yeah. Mum Day, Mum Day, Mum Day, Mum Day, Mum Day, Mum Day, Mum Day, Mum Day, Mum Day. Can you tell if I'm saying Mum Day or Monday? Monday. Mung Day. What about Mung Day? The day we celebrate the humble bean. Mung, mung Day. Monday. What about, what about Mung Day? The day we celebrate

the humble bean. Mung, Mung, Mung, Mung, Mung. Happy Mung Day, Mung Day,

Mung Day. You're tired today. You've been working hard all weekend, haven't you? I am physically shattered. You've done hard manual labour and you can't cope.

I am not built for this manual labour stuff. You've been ripping down your old shed. Yep. And you're just a wreck of a human. The old shed had to go. So a new shed can go in its place.

I did see the gals getting involved at the end, but you pretty much did it yourself. Yeah. Just lots of kicking and whacking and cutting and hammering and sledgehammering. You're lucky. You're just a piece of shit, aren't you? It was an F45 workout out there, guys.

My God. I was going to say, you look jacked. Yeah. Oh, yeah, thanks. I didn't do anything this week. You're done for the day. No physical movement. I'm done for the week.

No. All right. Coming up on the show today, another chance for you to win, all thanks to Spark. And Netflix, we've got our Netflix quiz back again today. And your chance to win a 12-month Spark broadband plan with our Netflix quiz. We'll do that around 7.30 this morning. The top six on the way? Yeah, a dog can drive a car.

We've seen a dog drive a car. Yeah, haven't we? My dog has driven a car. How has your dog driven a car? Was it your dog? Mark Vetti taught. Oh, that's right. I forgot it was your dog.

What? Effectively, it's just you put the car on a slight incline and then the dog puts its hands up on the steering wheel. So it looks like it's driving. It looks like it's driving, but it's not really driving. But this one can properly drive a ute. But a ute? Yeah.

Here were the times. That car should be driving a fully electric Nissan Leaf. There's no way a dog needs a Ute. I've got the top six other things you should be teaching your dogs to do in 2022. All right. Next on the show, though. Well, Whakatane High School's had a bit of an incident, shall we say. This is a massive school prank, isn't it?

It's not even end of year prank time. No, it's not. It's not prank month. You don't do pranks in May? It's not even end of year prank time. No, it's not. It's not prank month. You don't do pranks in May. It's so full on. Like I had a moment where I'm like, am I getting old? Because I was literally like,

it's too far. It's too much. I thought it was quite funny. I'll tell you what happened next. Disgusting the new Doctor Who, aren't we? Yeah, from Sex Education. Who, by the way, he's 28. And he's playing a high school student.

I think all those people on that show are like nearly 30. So he's the best friend of the lead character. And he's always got lovely glittery makeup. Yes. And the most incredible outfit. I don't know how to pronounce his name. Makuti Gatwa. He's 28.

He'll be the new Doctor Who. Yeah, I think everyone from that show is like close to 30. Imagine having such good skin that you could pull off playing a 17-year-old still as you head towards 30. Anyway, that's not what we're talking about. That guy who plays Adam Groff on Sex Ed must be, you know, the... Oh, yeah. Because he was in that submarine...

He's 25. Yeah, he was in that... What was that submarine TV show? And isn't that SAS one coming out about the origins of the SAS? That looks good. That looks really good. There you go. Breaking news.

Anyway, Whakatane High School has had an absolute nightmare of a situation happen. So someone has created a fake email address and they have sent to all students. So I guess they've got like an Outlook directory or something and have access like you do at work, all this network or all this. Do you remember years ago when it was a funny thing to email, if you left your computer

workstation open, someone would email the entire workplace directory saying something stupid? Yeah, yeah, yeah like I've got a little diddle or something Yeah, or they'd change your Facebook status Yes, yeah, classic Classic, well this one

as you said before Vaughan, a little full on. So it's from the principal, quote unquote, because it's not actually. And the email sent to all students of Whakatana High School is, send a picture of your penis to make sure it is up to school standards. It must be at least eight inches or you will be expelled. Sent to every single student of that high school. Very quickly,

the principal, Mr. Napton, who's, that's what the email says. It's from him. But so it's made to look, it's like a scam email. It looks like it's been sent from him. Yeah, so it's got a little profile pic of his face and it says Mr. Napton. Yeah, so it's got a little profile pic of his face and it says Mr. Napton.

Yeah. But it's not him, obviously. And he was informed of this on Friday. Now they're launching a full investigation. I feel like school prank, like that's next level. Our school prank was like putting a fake spider in

Mrs. So-and-so's drawer. Or putting some Roundup on the school grounds. I think the worst we did was put a little bit of fish in the walls. In the walls? Yeah, like behind one of the lockers in year 30. But see, year nine or something, there was a hole in the wall and we put a little bit of fish. Gross, it's going to stink, but it's not the end of the world.

This is like of a sexual nature to the minority of which are minors. To minors. A position of authority that has been like, completely undermined. And parents apparently have like, over the weekend, been out of control with it.

What the hell is this? Because this is the other thing, we're living in a world where QAnon-type conspiracy theories, people just need to be part of something. So it's a witch hunt, and then it's, of course it wasn't him. Well, that's exactly what he'd do. Yes, I know. That's exactly what he'd do if it was him.

Like, it's just, when I read it, I was like, oh, and someone is in so much trouble. Oh, yeah. You, when they get caught, they're in so much trouble. If this is a student, which I imagine it, I was like, oh, and someone is in so much trouble. Oh, yeah. And when they get caught, they're in so much trouble. If this is a student, which I imagine it is, because there's no elegance to the email. You would have said, like, dear students or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Regards, Mr. Napton. But they didn't. It's just, see the picture of your penis. You'd get expelled if it's not eight inches. But so if it's a student, right, they probably wouldn't have the nows to like use incognito mode or like hide their IP address

or do it from someone else's laptop. So it'll be a very quick investigation. Yeah, you sound like you've sent some emails hiding your IP address from using another laptop. No comment. I've sent a few. Well, Mother's Day Sunday and a study has been done

in America released on, because Mother's Day is there today isn't it Yeah So we've got another whole day of social media mums Do they do the same Mother's Day as us? Yes Different Father's Day Father's Day is like months different

Yeah, totally different time of the year I asked my mother If she would like me to put a social media post I was very much tongue in cheek when I was talking to her last night I was like, do you want to put a social media post up You know, celebrating you as my mother The hell would you do that for? I was like, fair call Christine

Enjoy your pedicure And facial voucher I got you. Wow. Well, three in four Americans say that they're a mini-me version of their mum. Yeah. Three in four Americans think they're just like their mum rather than their dad. Is that regardless of gender? Yeah, it is.

So the boys feel like they're their mum? Yeah, but then there'd be just as many guys that think they're like their mum, though, wouldn't they? Yeah, yeah. I'm probably more like my mum than my dad. Probably could do with a bit more dad, but pretty mum-heavy. Cynical. No time for, like, bullshit. Yep.

We don't share a culinary palate, though. No time for like bullshit. Yep. We don't share a culinary palate though. She's very much plain food. You love your spice. We're out of everything, you know, rocket spicy. So the people that were surveyed said the similarities and differences they share with their mums, seven in ten believe they have similar personalities. Half of people said they share the same sense of humour and hobbies

and parenting styles and political views were about the same as well, 50%. I feel like I used, when I was younger, I thought I was my dad because my dad's a real like clown, extrovert, loves an audience. But as I've gotten older and as this girl has become a woman, I've turned more into my mother, for sure, to the point where I'm like, I reckon I'm 90% her. Yeah. Everything she does, everything she's into,

the way she talks, her attitude, political views. I swayed her. I pulled her from the dark side. Did you? Yeah. That's just what she tells you. You're not there with her in the polling booth, are you? Oh, no, I'm not. She could be lying still. Just to get you off her you? Yeah. Well, that's just what she tells you. You're not there with her in the polling booth, are you? Oh, no, I'm not.

She could be lying still. Just to get you off her back. Yeah. When my mum and my nan start talking, mum always says to her mum, careful what we say around Vaughan. Well, she doesn't want you to cancel nan. You can't cancel nan. And then nan looks at me and I'm just like,

I'm just asking everybody to be, you know, polite and respectful. Oh. Well. That's all go. But Fletcher, you didn't, you know, acknowledge whether or not you're like your mother. I'm like my mum. You are your mother. You and your mother are the same person.

Sensible people. Great people. Play it. C.D.M.'s Fletch Vaughan. Play it. The University of Bath in England. This is a name I recommend. Recognise from previous

studies. They seem to do a lot of social type studies. That must be their forte. Well, this is what I've got in my hot little hand here, Vaughan, is a social media study looking at the impact of taking one week, just a one-week break off of social media, your Instas, your Twits, your Facebooks, your Talks. What they did is they got a big group of individuals from age 18 to 72

who used social media every single day, and they split them into two groups. One was an intervention group and one were allowed to scroll as normal and just log the amount of time they were on social media. The other group banned for one week, forced to take a break. They did admit

between them, half of this group to 22 minutes that they did sneak on social media. Oh, okay, yeah. Collectively. So it wasn't too bad. So they were like, we're taking a break. We had a little sneak. We had a little sneak. 22 minutes collectively over one week, not too bad. Maybe you needed to see

what time the party started, because you know, you get all your invites. It's all on Facebook. It's all on Facebook. Exactly. Or just follow Pink to the party, because when she's coming up you better get the party started. Oh, yeah. I don't know. I'm not even...

What happened there? What happened there? I was referencing a 20, maybe even 21-year-old song from Pink. Jesus Christ. Coming up so you better get this party started.

Was the party happening on a Saturday night? I don't even think Gary McCormick would have said that joke. Gary McCormick wouldn't have got that joke. I had that song on a mini disc player. Yeah. I recorded it myself off Winamp into my mini disc player. Now, on my mini disc player, I could digitally separate the file

and then I could name that pink underscore. Let's underscore get underscore the underscore party underscore started. Biggest pink fan over here. Wow. Early pink. I went and saw early pink in the year 2001. That would have been fresh.

When I was 11 years old. My parents let me go by myself. With a friend, anyway. Do you know the best part of that song is when it goes... Get this party started on a Saturday night. And everybody's waiting for me to arrive. Sending out the message to all of my friends. At 26. I'll be looking classy in my Mercedes Benz.

I got lots of stars in my gold diamond ring. Jesus Christ. What is that? Can you? I know the bit you're talking about. I can't go on until I hear that. I know the bit you're talking about. Do you want to find it or shall I attempt to find it?

Can you queue it up? I'm going to finish this because I'm nearly done. There's not that many stats to it. And then we can end with your blah, blah, blah. All right? One for me, one for you. Anyway, after one week off social media, the- I'm not going to talk on this part because I've got to find the part in the post.

Yeah, that's okay. There you go. I'd actually prefer it. Okay. Oh, God. Oh, wait. I'll blow my headphones. Get your headphones in.

I'm coming up. Excuse me. Oh, God. Oh, wait. I'll plug my headphones. Get your headphones in. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. I'm coming up. Excuse me. I'm going into it. Wee, mee, mee, wee, mee, mee. Okay, you can. A private world of pink. After one week off social media, everyone's well-being was so much better.

I'm even distracted now. I can still hear it. We can hear that. Huh? We can hear your headphones. Oh, I'll turn them down a little bit. Okay, yeah. When did it happen?

I can still hear it. I just saw it happen. At the end of every chorus? I think it's at the end, isn't it? Doesn't it go do-do-do-do-do-do-boom? Yeah, the end. Just before the last chorus. Yeah.

I've lost interest in this. I tell you what, after one week, the people that took a break off social media had better well-being, less anxiety. That's the end of the study. But we know how bad it is, don't we? Well, yeah. Social media. Curated life, looking at people's lives and being like, mine's not as perfect as that.

People who did stay on social media, seven hours a day. Yeah. It's bad. TikTok holes. It's terrible. It's at the end of the instrumental part. Okay. Are you ready?

I'm just going to rewind a little bit so you get a feel for the instrumental part. So you've got two options if you want to make your day better. One, you can take a break off of social media. Or two, you can go down a pink rabbit hole. I hope this is the part. Is it coming? Was it that? Or was there a more?

No, that's not at all That's not a pronounced part That's not it It's just a slight crescendo This would be a great part Oh No DJ Smith on the decks Yeah, that's smooth, man Is it coming? Is it? Oh, man, DJ Smith on the decks. Yeah, that's smooth, man.

Is it coming? Is it? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's coming up. It definitely is. It's building. It's building. You're right.

It was at the end. I should have listened to you. Yeah, why? You were on radio at the time. Is it right at the start of the song that it does it more? I'm so glad that we... Oh, look what's next on this playlist. Scissor Sisters, Take Your Mama. It was Mother's Day yesterday.

Should we just do a bloody Friday jams for the rest of the show? Should we just see what happens? Oh, good song. Have we done this? Friday, it's your Friday flashback this week. Write it down. Friday flashback. Have we found a new segment of the show where you deconstruct songs?

It is at the start. Yeah, it's at the start and the end, yeah. Book ended. Are you happy now? I tell you what He's perked up I've perked up somewhat From the start of the show

I've written it down You've got to listen all week And then you'll hear me play Take your mama out all night From the bustling ZM think tank This is the top six Hey there Someone taught their dog

To drive a ute Old news. Mark Vitti here in New Zealand has been doing it for years. Yeah. But actually drive it or sort of perch on the steering wheel and go, look all cute. Well, he taught people to drive them. He taught dogs to drive a mini, right?

That was in an ad and then everyone was like, well, that was CGI. He does a lot of the animals and ads. Yeah. Movies kind of stuff in New Zealand. Great dog and just does have this really uncanny connection to animals.

Like when he met my dog who's just like there's something wrong with her. She's special. She's a bit special. She's challenged. Just had this instant connection. No bad dogs, he said. And then just went about teaching them to do stuff. So we shouldn't be teaching dogs to drive utes.

Wait, I have another question about this dog that's driving the ute. I don't have the answer. It's just an automatic, right? It's got to be. Oh, yeah, it's not doing the gears or anything. I don't think it's doing the clutch and the gear stick. It's just like behind the wheel. Even column, yeah, the column shift.

Yeah. Would need a pump the clutch to. It would need a hand and thumbs and a grip. Not if he had a special glove. You got me there. Not if he had a special glove. Well, there are vehicles for people without the use of their legs that can drive and it's all controlled by the hand. Yeah.

So maybe there's a throttle and stuff and the dog... Yeah, beep the horn with your tongue. God, texting. Bloody dogs will be in the Formula One. The top six things you should be teaching your dog because it's 2022 after all. Teach the dog to drive an electric vehicle or a hybrid, you know? Yeah.

Not a dirty old diesel. Number six on the list, not fetching the paper, fetching the tablet. Because we all take our news digitally, don't we? Yeah, I don't know if you need a crack in your corner of your screen where it's trying to bite your

lap. Gentle mouth. Your iPad. Imagine if... Slubbery too. If like paper delivery people now were tossing iPads over the fence. Yeah, and your iPad every week. This is like the weeks of... Well, we've got to come up with a better system. Number five on the list of the top six things

you should be teaching your dog in 2022. Not chewing a bone, chewing a vegan treat. Everybody's vegan. So? You can't want them all. Number four on the list of the top six things a vegan treat. Everybody's vegan. So. You can't want them all. Number four on the list of the top six things

you should be teaching your dog in 2022. Detecting fake news with their amazing sense of smell. Oh yeah. You know how there's like assisting dogs

that can be like I sense danger. All those dogs that like they bring into like hospitals and they're like Cancer. Nan's got cancer.

Yeah. Well dogs can smell COVID right?'re like. Cancer. Nan's got cancer. Yeah. Well, dogs can smell COVID, right? COVID, yeah. So this dog can sniff bullshit. Yeah. It's like. Fake news. Yeah, and if you're about to like reshare it,

they'll bite you on the ankle to tell you not to. To nip at you. Number three on the list of the top six things we should be teaching our dogs in 2022. Being guard dogs, but not the traditional sort of like roaming the property, keeping out bad guys, just sitting in front of the fridge.

So you don't do that thing where you just aimlessly walk up to the fridge and open it. And you're like, I don't need a slice of that cheese that's wrapped in plastic, but I might have four. Because one's never enough.

No, it never is. Never enough. Number two on the list of the top six things you should be teaching your dog in 2022. When it can smell a certain level of alcohol on your breath, like a

breath detector, it takes your phone away from you. It just sneaks. It just sneaks your phone away. Good idea. It buries it in the garden and it'll dig it up and bring it back to you the next day. And if you're a recidivist drunk driver maybe you could take your keys as well. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, you hop into

the car and just... into your dog. Yeah, and it's like... And then it calls you an Uber. Yeah. That'd be good. Good skill for a dog. Order it with its nose. As Fletch pointed out before, or you pointed out before, dogs don't have fingers. No, they don't.

Famously. How freaky would a dog be if it was born with fingers so it still walked on its paws but it had fingers out the front? Creepy. Number one on the list of the top six things you should be teaching your dog to do in 2022. A guide dog.

But guiding you away from your ex. So you never get taken back. Or you don't run into them accidentally in public. Also, they say a dog's a great way of, they're great people judges. Oh, yeah. You know, if a dog's don't like people, if you've got a friendly dog and it doesn't like someone,

it might know something that you don't. So it could also be your ultimate little dating tool. That is today's top six. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. So it could also be your ultimate little dating tool. That is today's top six. Well, on behalf of Les Mills, OnePoll has done a study looking at why we're not exercising at the moment because apparently people are exercising less than ever. And I would have thought it would have been excuses like... I can't breathe properly because I've had COVID.

Maybe, or like I'm hungover, or maybe more body positivity stuff at the gym, I don't enjoy it. Yeah. But it's the pandemic largely. Right. 80% of people that were surveyed agree that the pandemic ruined their motivation to go to the gym. So that's a myriad of reasons why.

Some of them are like working out in a mask makes it less comfortable. They're not, you know, it makes it harder to work out. 53% of people were blaming the fact their gym was closed. So then you got to try to work out at home, which is super boring and unmotivating. I tried. Like I could go for a bike ride or a walk or whatever,

but doing like burpees or like abs in your lounge is yeah nah that first lockdown in 2020

I killed it like in the my little home gym it was freezing cold I like smashed it and then when we had more lockdowns I was like

I'm not doing that again yeah I've got more food to eat drinks to drink it was the second lockdown where I did better with that because the first one was just like, hey look this party isn't

going to happen again. Let's enjoy ourselves. Let's eat big stews every day and lots of bread. Stews? Oh my god, this guy can choose to eat anything and he makes a lovely big succulent stew. This is why I'm most excited for winter. Coats and stews. I can't he makes a stew. Lovely big succulent stew. This is why I'm most excited for winter.

Coats and stews. I can't wait for a stew. Oh, yeah. Nice Irish, big, thick Irish stew. Yeah, big, slow-cooked chunks of beef. Yeah, now we're talking. But then the second one was a bit more like, okay, can't do that again. Yeah.

But, yeah, had good behavior there. Yeah. More than ever, millennials are the most likely to skip their workouts. Okay. And leg day. Yeah, I know. We're heavy up top, aren't we? We're actually tiny down the bottom.

A lot of fitness hurdles, other than the pandemic ruining people's motivation. Pricey gym memberships. 42% of people are saying that's a concern to them in these hard times. Yeah. Things like a $30 a week gym membership or PT sessions, heaven forbid. 42% of people are too embarrassed to ask staff for assistance.

You know, they don't know what they're going to do, so they just don't bother. Too many people comparing themselves to fitness influencers. Oh, don't do that. Don't do that. That's not real. Those are robots.

Yeah. Sexy robots. Very sexy robots. And they face tune. They face tune everything. They face tune their nips and everything. Yeah, everything. Nip churn.

Ab churn. Yep. Buttocks churn. Yep. 37% of people say that the thing that helps them get over their fear of the gym is working out in a group fitness You go to a class, you have to do it Yeah, we haven't been to a class for a while

We did the hardest class Les Mills has on offer together You should have seen us born A couple of machines A couple of units There was one point where there was a sled, wasn't there, and I had to push it and I got stuck halfway and nearly cried and it flinched to come and get me in the middle of the track.

You're not a husky or a reindeer. Pulling sleds or pushing sleds isn't your thing. And don't treat me like I am one. Thank you very much. Right. So does the study offer advice, like any motivation to? No. Go?

No. Just great excuses not to. Go or don't go, basically. Do what you want. Do what you want. Was it sort of they're trying to like subtly neg you into going? Well, they're messing with the wrong guy. I think so.

I won't be subtly negged into switching. Excuses, excuses, I think they're saying. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. So pulling down our old shed at our house Putting up a new shed So the old shed's got to be pulled down And at the weekend it was just full demo mode You didn't think about building the new one on top?

I thought about it But there's been some cities where that didn't work Yeah, of course I didn't want a cursed underground shed No So there were these old windows in the shed, old wooden windows. Like the wood around it was rotten.

Yeah. But the glass was still intact. So when I was pulling it, I pulled one of them out and the glass kind of broke as I pulled it out. There was another couple and I thought, I remember as a kid, my granddad let me throw a rock through a window. So fun.

And it was in a wool shed and I think they were changing the windows out. Right. And he said, do you want to throw a rock through a window. So fun. And it was in a wall shed and I think they were changing the windows out. Right. He said, do you want to throw a rock through a window? And I was like, this is the stupidest question

I've ever been asked. Of course I want to throw a rock through a window. And he's like, cool. And I, one of my, you know,

if you've seen that movie Inside Out, the core memories, your happy memories, I'd say one of my core memories is laughing with my granddad as we threw rocks through windows.

And that, is it that thin glass? Yes. Like this single. Real old. Because that's another thing I learned recently is glass is hard, but it's. Drops. Over time, it thickens at the bottom.

Yeah. It pulls itself down. I learned this too when I bought an old house. It's technically a liquid. It's a liquid. And over the years, especially if it's really, really old windows, it gets real thin up top. But what about new windows?

That wouldn't be the case for new windows, would it? Who knows? They're new. Too new. Too early to tell. I don't know. If your double glazing starts getting a bit thin at the top, you might be in trouble, though.

Interesting. Crazy, eh? Gravity. Gravity, huh? Kids were inside. I stuck my head inside. I was like, if you guys ever wanted to throw a rock through a window, and their eyes just lit up, and they were like, yes, we have.

I was like, well, come with me. I've got a treat for you. And they were so nervous about doing it because I remember, you know when you're allowed to do something naughty, and there's like this – I don't think if you've got no reluctance at all, you're probably a psychopath. But you've got a little bit of like, okay, how do you want me to do this? Because I remember with my granddad, I'm like this, I don't think if you've got no reluctance at all, you're probably a psychopath. But you've got a little bit of like, okay, how do you want me to do this? Because I remember with my granddad, I'm like, do I throw it hard?

And he's like, well, the harder you throw it, it's going to blow glass further. So maybe just like get it in and it'll be easier for us to clean up. Surely you would have smashed windows as a kid, like accidentally, like balls, cricket. Yeah. So many times. Yeah, I remember I threw a shoe at my brother and it missed and went through the window. Yeah, all that. I've broken heaps of windows as a kid.

I shot a slug gun through the window. Ooh. I was like aiming at something out the window and then as I pulled back, I pulled the trigger and it just went boom and just blew a hole through the window. I got, well you might not be surprised to learn I got a hiding for that. Yeah, absolutely. Because I wasn't allowed to do that.

This is also the man applying for a gun license. Oh dear. No, don't give it to him. If you're listening, whoever gives these licenses out. Give me, give me, give me, give me, give me. So they came out. They got a rock each. They picked their rock from the garden on the way out.

And they got to throw a rock through a window. And then Sade was at the start. She was like, be careful. And then after they both had a turn, she's like, I would like a turn. She's never smashed a window in her entire life. Not even by accident. Not even by accident. Oh, you got it.

You certainly must smash glass at some stage of your life. The slow motion videos you put up on your Instagram story are just amazing. So satisfying. I wish I'd set up my phone on like a tripod right by the window on super slow motion. Yes. Do you know what I would have done is I would have wrapped my hand and punched the window. No, no, no.

I did that with the first ones, I elbowed one. Yes. Bang, like that. Because it was so, I could just tell it was brittle and thin and the thing that was holding it was rotting, so there wasn't going to be much resistance. Yeah, right. But that was pretty badass.

But I was wondering this morning, what was the naughtiest thing you were allowed to do? Oh, yeah. Throwing a rock through a window is naughty if you're not allowed to do it, but if you're given permission, it's still naughty. You still get that little kick of smashing some glass, but you're actually allowed to.

What about when you're allowed to do the big bonfire? That was fun, eh, as a kid? Oh, yeah. Do we include things like, you know, back in the day, pre-parents giving a toss about the safety of their kids when you used to hop on the back of the trailer? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah.

And the road to the dump in Wainuiomata was real bumpy and we used to like... Did you go all the way from Eastbourne to Wainuiomata? On a trailer. Over the hill? Yeah. I don't know why. All the way on a trailer? We used to be like, oh, oh, oh. Did you go all the way from Eastbourne to Wainui Amada? On a trailer. Over the hill. Yeah. I don't know why. All the way on a trailer.

We used to ride on the trailer. No, no, no. Oh, my God, no. We were in the car. Oh. And then we'd get in the driveway. We'd ride on the tray of a ute all the time. Yeah, all the time.

My grandparents' farm was long, so you'd always drive up the road to get to the back of it. You were never allowed in the front because you had to be able to jump off to open the gate. Oh, yeah. Well, any listeners living in the islands or grew up in the islands, you're still right around the back of the U. Oh, absolutely. I remember when my parents were renovating when I was a goth

and they were going to renovate my room and I said, well, before you renovate it, can I tag the walls? And I covered those walls. I just got a Sharpie and covered them in like pentagrams and like Marilyn Manson. You're covered them in like pentagrams. And like Marilyn Manson. You're like doing all the pentagrams and all of a sudden Satan's like, hello? And you're like, what?

I'm like, will you summon me? Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to. Don't waste my time again. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Sorry, Satan. All right, well, we want to tell you. That was naughty that time you summoned Satan. It was so naughty.

We're talking about what you were allowed to do that's naughty, but you were actually like given permission to do it. Yes, I let my daughters throw some rocks through some old windows. Right. That's up there with letting them have a shandy. Oh, yeah, a little sip of froth. August was always like, I love wine. I love wine for years.

Ever since she was like a little kid. She was literally like, there was a news story about how she told her kindy teacher that she loved wine. She's on the juice. I love wine. And so one time I was like pouring a wine. She was literally like, there was a news story about how she told her kindy teacher that she loved wine. She's on the juice. I love wine. And so one time I was like pouring a wine for Shaddaa and she's like, I'll have one. I was like, pour her one. I was like, drink it then.

And she was like, put it to her mouth and was just like, oh, I actually don't feel like a wine. Yeah, right. So what was the naughtiest thing you got to do as a kid? 0800 DARS at Emerson number. You can text as well, 9696. Some text messages in on the subject. Someone said we were allowed to smash plates and cups when we were in a bad temper.

Just to like get it all out. Oh my God, that's genius. We'd take the old chipped plates and the old broken cups and we'd go out and we'd be allowed to smash them. You'd want to smash them in a small confined space. Into a box. Yeah, but if you're too close

it bounces back. There's a man who smashed many plates. Yeah, you've got to wear some protective goggles. Yeah, chuck some goggles on.

The way I was as a kid that my parents wouldn't have been able to keep up and there wasn't Kmart back in the day so these would have been blimmin'.

Those brown, those brown plates that everybody had. The glass brown. Yes. Yes, had. The glass brown. Yes. Yes, yeah. The arc rock. You couldn't smash those.

Yeah. But I tell you what, if they were hot and you put them on a cold bench, they smashed themselves. They did. They blew themselves to bits. Someone messaged in saying, my nanny used to let me light her cigarette. No word if it was a lighter or matches.

Are they a lifelong addict now? Nothing. When you're a kid and you got to strike a match. Oh, I couldn't do it for years. I was too scared. I thought it was going to explode. I remember being a kid and you couldn't work a lighter. You didn't have the strength to spark it. Yeah, yeah, the length of phalange to do both at the same time.

Yeah, and you thought your finger would, like, catch a blaze. This is really naughty. I remember my other granddad let me flick. You know how you flick matches? Don't do this. Yeah. You flick them, and so as you flick it, it goes past and strikes, but then it spins and it's on fire.

He let me light the bonfire once. Like that. It was absolutely, he was a pyromaniac, old Ted. It was absolutely drenched in diesel too, so it was like. Black smoke, that was the 80s though, baby, that was the 80s. And that's why you set primary schools on fire now. Yeah. Arson.

Only if they decommission primary schools. Okay. And you know, there are a few out there that have been decommissioned. I used, my granddad taught me to roll cigarettes. And at the start of the day when we're having breakfast, we'd roll as day cigarettes. How good? It's so bad.

So good. Somebody said, Hayley, your trip to the dump where you used to go on the trailer when you got to the dump. We can beat that. We used to go to the dump on the way back when the trailer was empty. Dad used to let us road surf all the way home. That's insane. Like dragging on the back. We're to go to the dump on the way back when the trailer was empty. Dad used to let us road surf all the way home. That's insane. We're like standing on the trailer.

Oh my god, no. We used to have that on the farm, but we were no, no, no. No, no, no. Oh. My dad. Okay, I think this was a genuine mistake. Dad bought a bottle of

pre-mixed booze because he just thought it was a kid's drink for my birthday. And I drank it and I had to go to school and that was my first hangover at the age of 12. Was it a vodka cruiser? Oh my gosh, or like a mudshake. It was what they just said was a pre-mixed bottle of sex on the beach. What is sex on the beach?

Rum? Yeah, it probably would be, like a white rum. Yeah. We had a house on our old farm and it wasn't safe to live in anymore and they were going to get rid of it. And so me and my best mate were allowed to set it on fire. Oh. Oh, my God.

How cool would that be? I would love to set something on fire. How would you do that? Like, would you set a fire in the middle of it? Yeah. Like, you're allowed to set a house on fire. How would you do that? Like, would you set a fire in the middle of it? Yeah. Like, you're allowed to set a house on fire. How would you do it? I would set multiple fires around the outside.

Oh, okay. And let it burn to the middle. But those old, I've seen this happen on old farmhouses before. Like, these are old, like, 1800s villas, riddled with borer, but as dry as a bone. And they just go up like powder. Yeah, right. Yeah, they're dust basically.

If you've got a building that needs burning down and you've got three willing participants Yes, please. I think that's why they let like firemen come over and practice.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They fill it with smoke, right? And then they're like, yeah, yeah, they use the apparatuses and stuff. Somebody said, we had an old car

on the farm and dad said to me, do you want to do a jump in that? I was like I think I do Mum hit the roof I bet she did Because you could still very much kill yourself Very much die

There's no word of dad Put a bloody five point safety harness in Or anything like that I love that A few more stories of Nan and the cigarettes. Nan and the darts. Nan and the darts. Luke's called up.

This was you as well, Luke? With the ciggies? What was the naughtiest thing you got to do as a kid? Hi. Yeah, so me and my brother, we used to steal our parents' cigarettes and we decided to steal some biscuits and have a good feast out of them

and sleep out and smoke up. And we got caught. Classic combo. And we got caught and so our parents went out and bought us a pack of cigarettes each, some tailor-made, and made us smoke them one after another. Oh, that's sick.

And then made us eat all the biscuits and then we had to go for a big run around the block with our big brother behind us kicking our ass if we weren't fast enough. What? My dude. Did that stop you smoking? Yes, I don't smoke. What about biscuits? Do you still eat

biscuits? Yeah. So they don't win that one. Yeah. You're gonna pick your battles. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. There is a global vigilante climate group who are targeting... Captain Planet, the Planeteers. Captain Planet and the Planeteers are targeting Utes, people that drive Utes and sports utility vehicles, SUVs, in Auckland, and they are deflating tyres in suburbs.

And then they're leaving a note on the car. What does the note say? There are a group called the Tyre Extinguishers. You're not extinguishing the tyre, you're deflating the tyre. You're deflating the tyre. Should we call the tyre deflaters? Well, yeah. Well, that's what they call themselves.

They need to go back to the drawing board on the name. They've done similar things in the UK, Germany, Switzerland, the Netherlands, and the United States. And they're doing it because of climate change. So the notes said we've deflated one or more of your tyres. You'll be angry, but don't take it personally. It's not you, it's your car. It's a massive A4.

It's hard not to say that personally when you're the person who selected that car. Yeah. How are they getting around on bicycles? You'd imagine it would be quite ironic to be, well, yeah, unless they're in a Prius. Last night we got a flat tyre. Sharda got a flat tyre in the Hyundai Santa Fe, which is an SUV. Ooh.

Except it was a screw through the tyre, so we feel it may have been. Oh, God. I've had so many of those. Yeah. Pain in the arse. But easy to, you take it down to your tyre dudes, eh, and they just bung it. Do they? Yeah, they put some glue on a thing and bung it through and then trim that little bung off.

Unless you've destroyed it. Oh, if it's shredded or if it's in the wall, she's a no-go. But if it's flat on the top. Anyway, I was lying on the ground of the New World car park, changing my wife's tyre. Yeah. And electric vehicles sound so funny when they drive past. Yeah, they do.

It's like they go... He's got a little voice in the car. Yeah. And so you've got to be careful when you step out on the road now. I can totally see how people get hit by that. It's a little whistle. It sounds like a little whine. Yeah. I wonder if these vigilantes are coming for old Greg Grove from Nova and his ute.

We've got a ute. Oh, yeah. We do have a ute. So police say they've received a couple of reports on Saturday of tyres being deflated around Auckland. But, I mean, this is happening worldwide, and so I wouldn't rule it out. He's not street parking the ute. No, we're up the driveway.

No, they wouldn't be going up driveways. It's trespassing. If he leaves the house, he's going to, like, you know, the groceries or something like that. Right. Well, yeah, maybe just look out for a greenie on a bicycle. I just... My nana, RIP, shared a saying,

you catch more flies with honey than vinegar. Now, I don't think letting down people's tyres and pissing them off is necessarily going to win them to your cause. Yeah. Drastic action is needed on the climate. Oh, absolutely. You know, absolutely. There's no doubt about that.

But I don't know whether or not personally attacking somebody's vehicle is going to win you any favours. And as somebody who's just messaged in said, how much pollution do they think a tow truck spews out as it's chunking around, like, and then hoisting a car up and taking it somewhere to have all the

tyres pumped up again? Yeah. Yeah. Because you can't drive if you've got a flat tyre. You can't really drive on that tyre to pump it up in the servo, can you? Or even AA coming to your rescue. They've got to use emissions. They're all you. Isn't like the biggest percentage

of our global emissions done by like seven companies from around the world? Yeah. Like the richest companies in the world are responsible for the majority of it. But isn't it like go deflate their tyres.

The biggest problem in New Zealand they farty cows. Why don't they just go and bung some cows up? God, if it's farts that's doing it, I am contributing to global warming. Cows will fill up and they'll float away. That'd be cute though.

Imagine just flying off with a cow. It can feel the bung coming loose and then you've got a cow being like 22.8 I don't know how to really interpret this because they're being very vague in this study but I'll do my best So this study is looking into

what is flirting and how to do it successfully and obviously it's breaking it down into what you're looking for or what you're trying to achieve with your flirt. Are you trying to find the daddy for your babies? Or are you trying to find tonight's hanky-panky? Right. Now, if you're trying to find just a little bit of a fun time for the night,

for women, they say, you need to give signals that you are sexually available. But they haven't given examples of what these are. Well, you're a woman. If I was trying to show that I was sexually available, you can get the baps out, I guess. Yeah, but then you could have the baps out but not want that. Yeah. I don't know.

Maybe. Yeah, they haven't said that. But if I was looking for a long-term partner, the key is smiling. Yeah. Yeah, that's cute. I'm giving you a smile. Yeah. Yeah.

Full teeth and eye contact. That's a bit of a. Yeah. Yeah. Full teeth and eye contact. That's predator. Full teeth and eye contact. You look like you're high on meth or something. When they say full teeth, I'm trying to get the back teeth and the bottom. Let them know. I want to have babies with you. That's the look if you're looking for a long-term partner,

is full teeth and eye contact. Right. If you're looking for a short-term fling, signs that you're sexually available. No teeth? I don't know. Shake your baps. Shake your bum bum.

I'm not sure. They say things like hugging, it's's too full-on hugging's too uh friendly for friendly for flirting quick kiss on the cheek it's not overt enough okay so yeah i guess you're either a full t eye contact or you're going straight for a lip kiss it's like those birds on the old um attenborough series the birds always fluff everything up, don't they? And they make a little pattern out of some sticks and they do a sexy dance around it. Oh, yeah, they get their wings and they're like...

Yeah, they're plumage. Yeah, they've got real sex dancers. That's what they're showing. They're showing everything they've got. That's what they mean, baps out. I think Christina Aguilera, Dirty, should come on and if you're not looking for sex that night, you should have to sit down.

Yeah, and if you are, you get low. Yeah, yeah. Oh, you definitely get low. You get low. Yeah. And apparently it's international. So they say that flirting is an international language. So this full teeth eye contact or showing that you're sexually available is an international language.

Right. And surely it's just whether you're hot or not, right? No, apparently it's got nothing to do with it. Nothing to do with if someone's hot or not. All you've got to do is don't blink and show your teeth. It's regardless of whether you're hot. Being hot's the burly, but it's not the bait. Yeah, right.

Being hot's the burly, it'll get them in your burly trail. Yeah. So you can be flailing in the water. Okay. But then you've flailing in the water. But then you've got to have the bait that they're into. And the bait's got to be the teeth and the eyes. Yeah. Do you know, the other one on here,

if your teeth and eyes aren't working for you, you could try humour. People love a giggle. I always flirt with older women. Two reasons. It's fun. They love it. And they appreciate it. Get a bit of a giggle. I always flirt with older women. Two reasons. It's fun. They love it. And they appreciate it.

Get a bit of a tickle. And they... They love your dad jokes? Yeah. They love your shit jokes. Oh, he's such a funny man. They're very much my audience. Yeah, right.

The older dames. Yes, yeah. You've found your crowd. Yeah, definitely. Are you hoping it goes anywhere? No, no, no. That's the other good part about it is it's not going crowd. Yeah, definitely. Are you hoping it goes anywhere? No, no, no. That's the other good part about it is it's not going anywhere. Yeah.

Oh, you're just leading them on. Oh, no, I'm certainly not leading them on. These old dames go home heartbroken. If your wife leaves you, you've got your pack of the Ryman rest home, don't you? Oh, do I what? I'm going for Judith. Room's got the best of you.

Judith, eh? She's a giggler. I'm all started. I'm all started. Get started. Don't get let started. Ha! Judith, Rhym's got the best view. Judith, eh? She's a giggler. In here! In here! Well, I mentioned this this morning, and Vaughan, you thought this would be a great opportunity for me to have a vent. A little go.

But I don't think I'd be alone in this. Get it off your chest, babe. What is it? At the gym, at the gym, at the weekend, I was doing some exercises at the machine. Upper or lower? Don't show off. It was an upper. Yeah, I can see.

He's jacked. You've got a pump on. Yeah. And then just out of the corner of my eye, I thought someone was talking to me. You know, like, they might be like, how many sets have you got to go bra? I want to jump on this after you. Are you using this bra?

Yeah. Sit arms bra. And so I turned around. Yeah, doing a smooch. Took a bra. What happens at your gym? Tons of smooching. Really?

So much smooching up in the women's gym. I'll tell you what. Smooching all day, all night. It's a smooch face. It's famously a safe space. Until you get there. Until I get there. So I like took an

ear pod out and I was like Sup bruh. And then I looked at him and he's just on the phone to someone with his ear pods in. But he's doing exercises. And then he keeps doing exercises. Oh. And then he keeps doing this for like half an hour.

I just see him because I'm like, surely this was a quick conversation. He's just having a bloody old chin wag with someone. He can't be going max effort. He's working out and just talking, you know, loudly, like normal voice level. And then I'm just like, it's like, have you ever gone into a shop and someone's on the phone, but then they're serving you? Yeah.

Or like you get an Uber and they're talking the whole time to their friend. I don't have a problem with a phone up to the air or if someone's walking around, phone up to the air, but there's something really obnoxious about like- The hands-free. AirPods and hands-free. Because people with AirPods think they're better than the people who just wear one ear Bluetooth.

They're not. They're as bad as not worse. Yesterday I was in Pack and Save and I was talking to my mother for it was Mother's Day. Yeah. And she rung and I thought, well, I'm not going to sit in the car and delay my supermarket trip, so I'll just talk to her. So that was me. Because you have big hour-long conversations.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So did you do the whole supermarket on the phone? Yeah, when I got back to the car, it connected to the car and then we carried on as I drove home. With phone up to ear? Phone to ear. It's still obnoxious, though. Yeah, it is.

Like, you were like, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, yeah. He said, what? Oh, my God. Yeah. The gym's a bit funny for me because, I don't know, aren't you supposed to be working out? I don't like talking while I'm puffing. Yeah. The gym's a bit funny for me because, I don't know, aren't you supposed to be working out? I don't like talking while I'm puffing.

Yeah. Yeah, because they can hear you and they'll hear you like, who? He needs to be adding some more weights, brah. He hasn't gone hard enough, brah. Nah, brah. He's not going to get them gains with that attitude. But etiquette-wise, you'd say no to conversations in public on AirPods?

When they're really loud. Sometimes I might have a little quiet one. You know what I mean? But not like full tap. Like I've answered the phone and been like, I'm just at the gym, I'll call you back later. Or maybe had a quick 30-second convo if it needs to be had. But I'm not going to just have an hour-long convo

while I'm at the gym with someone. No. No, I agree with you here. He was out of line, and he also needs to add some more weight, bruh. Was he jacked, or was he a skinny little boy? I think he was jacked. He was jacked. Yeah.

Son of a gun. Maybe he's doing low weight, high rep. He's got jacked, isn't he? He might have been, yeah. It wasn't counting the reps. Low rep, high weight. I mean, you could give him a call. What's his cardio like, though?

Yeah. I don't know, bruh. Yeah, high weight. I mean, you could give him a call. What's his cardio like, though? Yeah. I don't know, bro. Yeah, because that's why, you know, famously Jake DeMoss once said, too many weights, not enough speed work. Yeah. Then he put that guy's head through the jukebox. Yeah, yeah. Down the tab.

Get on the treadmill, bro. Yeah. A bit more speed work. Did he have skinny little legs? I don't know. Top of your head? I can't remember. Top of your head, skipping leg day.

A lot of skinny little legs at Les Mills. Yeah, yeah. Too much chest. Yeah, a lot of chest. It's all about the chest. Yeah, right. Got a whole body to work out. Get on that stair machine.

Don't forget those little ankles. No, yeah, yeah. Get a bit of cardio. Get your cardio up. Come on, bra. Balance it out, bra. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM.

Well, it was... The memory's a little vague because I was a coupleley. Play ZM. Well, it was, the memory's a little vague because I was a couple of Prosecco's deep bottles. Oh, you absolutely were. At a BYO on Saturday. But somebody at the table mentioned that they- I almost think your double head is worth talking about here. That I had two big nights.

I know. And not even a homazine in sight. This is what disappointed me because you had the booze look in your eye that you were going to end up in a homazine in sight. This is what disappointed me, because you had the booze look in your eye that you were going to end up in a homazine. You even sent me a video of your table full of friends all chanting homazine. Yeah.

And I was expecting homazine part two. And then, of course, these things happen in a trilogy. You had to then, of course, there would have been a third homazine at some stage. No, you can't make a habit out of a homazine. So the doubleheader the second night, the BYO, somebody at the table revealed the fact that they had recently binged all of Grey's Anatomy.

Like, I'm talking season one. To season 20. To whatever the hell they're up to now. And they, the memory's a little vague, but I think they said six weeks. Which, when you have a job is insane. So I found a website. It's called bingeclock.com.

Now this is great if you're about to undertake a big binge because you can put in the show and it will give you all the seasons or you can just choose a season. And I've looked at Grey's Anatomy. It would take you nonstop, pressing play, season one till the end, 16 days and 12 hours of your life. Wow. And I think they did it in six weeks.

That's a big, that's a big no for me. Working from home certainly helps a lot of this binging, doesn't it? Cheapest. That's, but then we've all done it right. Maybe not Grey's Anatomy, but there have been shows. Yeah. There's bingeable shows. I watched Fleabag season one and two in one night.

Holy, in one night? In one night. And I think I stayed up till like 3.30, 4 a.m. I think I did Fleabag in two days. But they're 20-minute episodes. And there's only six per season. Yeah, easy to do. Still though, it's just in one night. And there's only six per season. Easy to do. Still though,

in one night, that's admirable. Great show though. When Aaron and I first started dating, we went for a weekend away to Foxton. Was it the fizz? Was it Foxton fizz? It was the fizz. We got absolutely fizzed. And we'd only been together for a few months and we binged the whole first

season of Game of Thrones. Because he was like, my brother has just shared me this incredible new show and I was like, oh God, I don't know if it's my cup of tea. Okay. Whole season and a weekend. And then that was it, you were hooked. If you hadn't seen Game of Thrones and you're like, tonight I'm going to

start. Chabot and I did that. There was only one season to go when she started watching it. Yeah. And so I re-watched it all. That's a lot though because they're full hour episodes. Yeah. Any of those like big HBO shows. Yeah. It's a lot of binging. But I thought could we take some calls now? Are we counting non-television

binges? Like what? Podcasts. Uh yeah. Sure. Because I slammed an entire, I got up to date for the podcast that started like six years ago, 99% Invisible, which is all about design and stuff. They started a short episode. They were like five minutes, the first however many.

And then obviously it took off. So they got longer and longer and longer. And at the moment I'm doing a Dungeons and Dragons podcast called NAD Pod. And I'm up to episode 85. And each episode is at least an hour long. And I started... Do you just have it on while you're potting around? Yeah, and I drive to work, listen to it, drive home.

So there's like almost an hour there. Well, those podcast apps, they'll give you a running total of all your episodes. Yeah, yeah. I like that with Casefile, just murder after murder after murder all day. You're a white female. Yeah.

See, mine's fantasy and play and hee-hee-hee, ho-ho-ho. Yours is ee-ee-ee. Murder. All right, well, I want to take some calls. I want to hear this morning your binge records. Like, what show did you just get absolutely hooked on and binge? And, like, maybe you had to cancel weekend plans. Yeah, how long did it take you?

Yeah, did you have to call in sick for work because you just had to finish a show? I think I do know a few people that had to watch however many seasons of Game of Thrones because the last season was there. Yeah. I'll quickly do it. So 0800 DARS at Emma's number, text it 9696. I want to hear your binge records and maybe what you did to binge these TV shows. Have you called in sick or made some excuses not to go out?

Give us a call. Play it. ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley. Well, we're talking about your binge records, the shows that you have just, you've given up, you've just put life on hold so you can binge TV shows. Not even time for a shower. Yeah. A friend at the weekend binging every single season recently of Grey's Anatomy,

which Vaughn was calling trash. It's trash. I think it's trash too. No, they're both a trash. Desperate Housewives? People? Desperate Housewives is absolute trash. Trash.

Hannah, you would disagree with Vaughn. Grey's Anatomy, big fan. Me? Yes. Yes. So how long did it take you to binge all the seasons? It took me probably about, so it was when season 16 had just come out. Oh, wow.

Because what are they up to now? 18. 18. Oh, 18. I used to watch it when I was like little. Yep. And then I thought, oh, I'm going to start watching it all over again so it took me

about maybe two months to watch all the seasons. Did you cancel plans on Friends? Did you hide away in your house? Oh definitely Because that was one of the shows if you go to bingeclock.com, Grey's Anatomy

at the moment will take you 16 days straight. So a season and a day, basically. It was like as soon as I got home from work, it was on. Wow. You know it's bad and you're hooked to a show when it's bedtime and you know you've got to get up in the morning and it's like 1am and you're thinking, oh, I'll just do one more episode. Oh, it's like that.

And then you go one more and then you get to the end of that episode and it's a cliffhanger and you're like, I'll just do one more episode. Oh, it's like that. And then you go one more and then you get to the end of that episode and it's a cliffhanger and you're like, well, I'm not going to give up now. Oh, you have to watch it. It's too long. We'll just push through. You do.

Ellen Pompeii in 2020 was making $550,000 per episode of Grey's Anatomy. She's number one, right? Yeah. When Hayley Cuoco stopped Big Bang, she became number one. She also received $6 million a year from her share of syndication profits.

So $19 million a year from Grey's Anatomy. Hannah, thanks for your call. Steve, what was your binge record? Breaking Bad. It took me about four or five days, three of which I had to take off work. Four or five days?

How many seasons there are? You were cranking through a season a day. Yeah, pretty much. I think all up is about 60 hours to watch the whole show. Yes, I'm just on binge clock. It would take you two days, 14 hours nonstop to watch Breaking Bad. If you put it on and then didn't turn it off. Yeah, and didn't turn it off. Yeah.

And didn't sleep. Right, yeah. I had a break. That's still pretty good time, though, because those are full episodes, too. Great show. Like 50, 60. What's that, sorry? Good long episodes. It's not easy.

Oh, yeah. You either have your energy or your sleep, too. Oh, yeah. Great show. One of the best. Steve, say my name. Vaughn. You're damn right Not quite the same

As Walter White there No Steve thanks You call Mel What was your binge record? Also I was impressed Steve said Vaughn And not either Fletch

Or Vaughn He could tell the difference Yeah Good boy Loyalist A few years ago We did All eight Harry Potter movies.

Oh, wow. And you did them all, how long did it take you? We started about eight in the morning on a Saturday and finished at about 4 a.m. on a Sunday morning. You took you one day? Yeah. Oh, my God, that's a marathon. It was like stretch and snack breaks in the middle,

like to get new snacks. You do have like, stretch and snack breaks in the middle, like to get new snacks. You do have to get up and stretch the legs, otherwise you might get piles. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What? You know, you sit on your bum too much. I'm watching it on cold concrete.

Is it piles or bed sores? It's bed sores. You might get bed sores. Or deep vein thrombosis, because it's like a long-haul flight, isn't it? Wow. Good effort, Mel. Thanks. You call some more messages

in your binge records McLeod's daughters that's trash too much shit happens on that farm that's trash Australian version of Osh would have

shut that down the minute that you went down that cliff and it's so annoying that I see the McLeod's daughters as trash it's straight trash

she likes and producer Anna loves terrible TV have you ever liked any show that's Of quality Sort of like Remarkable quality

That's really hurtful You were the Pack to the rafters Oh pack to the rafters Oh sweet Spock baby You were like A 50 year old

Yeah I am In a 20s body TV one 8.30pm You know where to find me Have you ever Liked a show That's won an Emmy

No I'm not about to start. You watch Fleabag? Quoted it as the greatest show of all time? Fleabag? Yeah, I like Fleabag. Do you watch

I May Destroy You? No. You watch Packs of Rafters? Yeah, I've seen it like three times. Jeepers Creepers. That's so awesome. Good lord.

Somebody said a friend gifted us all of the series of 24. Oh, I did that. We watched all eight series in four days. We had two to three hours sleep each day over Easter break. Going to work on Tuesday, absolutely sucked.

We were all so exhausted. When I had adult chicken pox, I binged all of 24. I've never watched it. It took me a few weeks. And that was old school on DVD. We had to change a disc. Oh, God, yeah, it would run out and go back to the menu. Heaven forbid.

Heaven forbid. It didn't just autoplay. Anyone message in with some Lost? Anyone done a binge of Lost? Nah, no. No Lost binges here. Lost you need to sort of have a week off and think about it. I think because by the time

you could binge it, people had heard how horrible it had ended, so they didn't want that to spoil it. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. Someone said Yellowstone. They recently binge watched that. That's on my list. Smashed three seasons because season four was coming out.

But then that's the thing. If you binge something in prep for a season and then it comes out weekly. Then you're halted. Yeah, and then you get all withdrawals. It blows apart. You're almost better to wait until the end of the fourth and then binge everything. Yeah. All of Game of Thrones. Game of the fourth and then binge everything. Yeah. All of Game of Thrones.

Game of Thrones is a very popular one. People binging all of Game of Thrones. Lots of Grey's Anatomy. Someone said, I'm on my fourth watch of Grey's Anatomy. There's so many other shows out there. So if you haven't seen Game of Thrones, that's two days, 22 hours nonstop. You could do that in a couple of weeks.

Yeah, absolutely. I'm in the mood for a binge now. I can see the clouds are coming over too. You know, it might be a little stormy afternoon on the couch. A bit of rain. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day,

day, day, day, day. Day. Day, day, day, day, day. Yeah, turn his mic down. He's a leader, not a follower. Now, you've taken, I've given you a small piece of feedback on the way that you sing the Fact of the Day jingle, and you've absolutely, you've taken it too far. Too far. You're too far you've taken it too far. Too far. You're too far.

I'm not too far. I think you should believe in yourself and just go confidently in the next one. Tune in tomorrow to hear a more refined. A more refined. We'll do some training. Today's Fact of the Day is we were actually just talking about Asian soups. We were. And Asian cuisine.

I said I feel like a sweet, sour, spicy broth. And I said what about a Tom Yum? Yeah. And Tom Yum rules. Which is one of my favourite soups. In fact, I would dare say, and I'll go on record. Yeah. No continent does a better soup than Asia.

Oh, what about the pho soup? That's Asia. It's quite an Asian continent. Sorry, Arthur, you meant country. Everywhere you go, you've got miso in Japan. Yep. You've got a range of the hot, Arthur, you meant country. Everywhere you go, you've got miso in Japan. Yep. You've got a range of the hot spicy soups from mainland China flowing down into Southeast Asia.

Yeah, I'll give you that. The Thai hot soups. Thai soups out of this world. Indonesian soups. Even your like creamy corn soups. You know when you go to like Chinese restaurants have them. Yeah. Your like sort of sweet, thick, gelatinous corn soup.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's a good call. I'm struggling now to pinpoint a soup in another continent that I would love, if not more. There's a fantastic Instagram called Eat Lit Food. And he goes around and he posted on his Instagram yesterday, white people make terrible soup. We're a stew. We're terrible soup. We're a stew. We're a people. We're a stew people.

Yeah. Asian soup's where it's at. Yeah. So what does Asian soup have to do with today's thing? Well, this kind of ties in to Asian cuisine. Okay. Yum. The eel, of course.

Okay, you lost me. Eden here in Aotearoa, great food source. Sometimes on the top of sushi. Sometimes. Well, Japan is the largest consumer of eel. Jellied eel. Do you know eels used to be so abundant in the streams, rivers and canals? Hayley was feeling a little queasy before this.

And now I have to join me to get you one of the buckets. I had a little bit of a tummy bug this weekend, and you just saying eel jelly. What did you say? Jelly to eel. Eels were so, there were so many in English rivers and streams and everything that people would just use to gorge themselves on eel. Now, I think as a kid going eeling so much

has put me off ever eating them. I think just knowing them. It's the mental thing. I've actually never tried eel, and I'm screwing up my nose, but it's because of the physical way that they move and their appearance and the black slippery... Eels. I've had smoked eel.

I had smoked eel as a kid and I remember my mum being like you won't like it. And she put that idea into my head. This is what she did. She gaslit us. She gaslit you about eels. Mum used to gaslight us about all sorts of food. You won't like that. What's that thing that looks like an alligator pear? They call that an avocado.

You won't like that. You won't like it. I won't eat it then, mummy. Gaslit me. And there was a word of cuisine out there. But I ate it as a kid and I was like, oh, that's a little bit unusual tasting. But I've eaten it since and I quite like. Mind you, I struggle to find something I won't eat.

But today's fact of the day is eel blood is poisonous to humans and other mammals. Eel blood. So when you cook an eel, it neutralises it. Yeah. And when you, and then the digestive process will also destroy

the toxic protein. I wish that we'd known this when we were kids and we were eeling. To get it on you. I wouldn't have even touched them. Yeah, it can happen. You have to ingest it though, right? In a large amount. Into the gut.

So no, the digestion, if you are eating only enough that your stomach can digest it, it's fine. If it got into you or like into a cut or got on you, it can be toxic.

Because you don't know you were playing with fire when you were a kid. I know, yeah. So there was a doctor called Charles Rocher, and he won a Nobel Prize for research into anaphylaxis caused by eel blood. Huh. Yeah.

Who knew? Who knew? Eel's blood can be toxic to humans. In fact, any mammals. Yeah, they tested this on – I hate to say it, but it was a while ago. It was a different time. He tested on animals, a range of different mammals and found rabbits with lipstick on them.

Yeah, they got their mascara and then they got their eel blood cocktail. Yeah. Call me a... Go home, Buxy. You're drunk. Call me a... I'm a happy princess. Let's go to the fire dock. Boing, boing, boing, boing.

Anyway, that's quite a horrible thing to imagine. So today's fact of the day is eel blood is toxic to humans. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day I do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do Blackfoot and Hayley's Silly Little Poe, Silly Little Poe It is so silly, silly, silly That silly little pole Silly little pole Silly little pole Silly little pole

Silly little pole Today's silly little pole. Do you like being referred to as the missus? Now I guess this is aimed at our... Oh, maybe not. Who knows? I don't know if I'd call Aaron my missus. He'd probably quite like that.

Quite confusing for him, I'd say, if all of a sudden you started referring to him as the missus. Yeah, exactly, after 11 years. Oh, sorry, I didn't introduce this as my missus, Aaron. There's humour to it, though. There is humour to it. To call a six-foot-eight dude with a massive beard the missus. I think I might do this because I don't like partner.

I feel like partner is bandied about too often. Yeah. You know, people, two months in, my partner, get a grip. Do you know what I mean? Get a grip. I don't like partner. Unless you're old. I'll forgive it if you're old because you can't be like 78 and saying,

this is my boyfriend. Oh, actually, that's pretty cute. That's pretty cute, yeah. But I would forgive if you were old, maybe widowed. Yeah. You're just shacked up with someone for a little bit of hanky. Hanky? Hank.

And I'd forgive partner at that age. But yeah, like, you're right. Oh, my God. Like, go through some stuff, you know what I mean? Start to really hate each other. Then you need to say partner. And also, I don't call Aaron my fiancé because I think fiancé is such a silly word. I've been there when you said to somebody,

my boyfriend Aaron, and he is your fiancé. I know. And you were like, yeah, we didn't use that. Whatever. I'm going to call him a missus. Yeah. Well, this is sort of that.

But then how do you feel when he calls you the missus? He doesn't. He wouldn't. He's a gentleman. Yeah. He calls me the light of his life. He calls me his raison d'etre, his reason for being. Okay.

No, he doesn't. Raison d'etre? No, that's one of those pastries with raisins in it. No, that's pain au raisin. That's what I call Charlotte. Close. They've both got raisin in them. I call her my chocolate.

What is it? Pain au chocolat. Pain au chocolat. Yeah, she's a little bit chocolat. Yeah. There you go. She's a little straight chocolat. Anyway, our poll results.

Do you like being referred to as the missus? 26% of people, yeah. They like it. The missus. The missus. 74% saying nah. I feel like it's got a, it's more of a derogatory, not derogatory, but you'd, oh, check with the missus.

Yeah. It's always used in that kind of context. Oh, the missus won't be happy. Yeah. Yeah, whenever you're in trouble. Steve won't be able to come out. His missus won't let him. What's the other one?

Oh, my old lady. The old lady. Oh, God, that's worse. I had a Scottish mate, and his dad used to call his wife her indoors. That's a real British thing. I was like, I beg your pardon? And he's like, I'll have to check wife her indoors. That's a real British thing. And I was like, I beg your pardon? And he's like,

I'll have to check with her indoors. Because that's the connotation is she's the housewife. She does the inside stuff, I do the outside stuff. Her indoors. And like, yeah, he started saying it.

I was like, we're too young to say her indoors. We're not going to get away with that. Cheyenne said, look, I'm not offended by it. It's not an insult. Better than being called his bro, friend, mate or sis.

Mate. Vaughan calls Sade mate. I only call Sade mate. Oh, my God. When Aaron calls me mate, I call him out. I'm like, don't call me mate. Oh, I think that's... I've put in too much effort.

The highest compliment. Not everybody's my mate. Very few mates. She's top of the pile. We'd say mate in like a kind of grumpy way. Oh, yeah. All right, mate. All right, mate.

Yeah, yeah. Hey, mate. Like, yeah. Hey, mate. Like, don't call me mate. Alex has said he can call me the missus when there's a ring to go with it. Oh!

I like that, Alex. Nighty says I have a name. Use it. Ooh, okay. Just such a demeaning term. Jesus. Nighty.

All right. All right, mate. Calm down. All right. All right, mate. Calm down. All right. Calm down. God, her endorsement's pretty great. He's her husband. He needs to get control of his missus.

Bloody Nairie's man's missus is pretty upset. Olivia agrees. It feels like a degrading term. Like, it has the connotation that I'm his property. Yeah, that's the word degrading. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. Kate said yes.

Better than the old lady or my woman. Hey, woman. Do you know what's even worse? Silvana says, you know what's even worse than Mrs. calling your partner your hubby? It's a big no on hubby. Maddie McLean says, I hate this so much. Misses.

People calling their partners their misses. Or does he hate being called the misses? You reckon Ryan calls them that? He probably does, actually. Maddie the missus? Sort of a dominant battle between the two of them, and that's why we love to watch their relationship blossom so much. We want to see, you know,

who's going to come out on top, who's going to be able to give who the titles. I can't read this one. I won't read the full word because she's used a very funny word in here but Nicole says, I don't know why

but it feels like a slap in the face and like he's too to say my wife even though everyone knows we're married. Lol. Right. So overwhelmingly,

I think the missus is dead in the water. Dead in the water. The word. Jesus. I was like, man, that's a dark turn. My daughter's had their first netball game. They played soccer and hockey last year. They want to give netball a bit of a bash.

They want to try marching? After netball. Maybe after netball. After netball. It's not a sport, though, is it? How long is it going to take? Because this is the good thing about hockey. You'd turn up 20 minutes before the game.

You'd have a little warm-up. You'd play the game and then you'd go home. Too long. We're talking 14 hours a weekend. No, sir. No, ma'am. And this sounds really selfish and I know good parents give up their entire weekend for their children's sport, but no, thanks.

Now, next time I'm taking a little fold-out chair. There was an old lady there and she had one of those fold-out camping chairs. What a good idea. And I was like, you thought ahead and she's like, I can't stand. I was like, you thought ahead, and she's like, I can't stand. I was like. Yeah, my wheelchair's over there. No, she had a walker. Right.

I felt bad, but at the same time, she had a seat, so I wouldn't feel too bad because I had to sit on the floor. I'm not really a floor sitter. Sitting's fine. It's the getting up that's hard. Why are you sitting on the floor? On the concrete. On the concrete.

There was no seats. Why don't you just stand? It's a whole nipple game. Look, I'll admit, I was a little bit hungover. I was a little bit dusty. It was the reason that my dustiness, I went to the canteen, the tuck,

and got a pie. Yeah. A steak and cheese pie. For $4, I wasn't expecting much. Pretty bloody good pie. I'll be getting one again next week. Oh, nice. Good to know.

So when I was on the line to get the pie, I was wearing a mask. Yeah. As people have been wearing during pandemic times and nobody else. I think I saw like a couple of other people wearing masks of all the people that were there and someone said to me in the line, you don't need to wear those anymore and i was like beg your pardon no like you don't need to wear those anymore i was like the mask they kind of like pointed i was like the mask and they're like yeah you think she was gonna say no pants i would have happily dropped trowel i would have been like thank god if you say so i don't want i don't want to offend any local

anywhere down they come. It wasn't that. It was the mask. I was like, oh, don't you? And they were like, no, no, you don't need to wear those anymore again. And I was like, oh, well, I guess that's just the freedom of choice. I'll continue to wear it. And she scoffed.

It's a strange opinion to push, isn't it? Because you're obviously entitled to wear one. I, going forward, I think I'd even fingers crossed touch would get this thing behind us. Pre-pandemic when people wore masks, everyone was like, oh, what's going on there? But a lot of the time that person

didn't feel well. Yeah, they were sick. So they might have had a little sniffle. So they're like, I'm going to wear the mask out of courtesy for the people around me. I think it would be a lot more of that. An Asian thing, right? Pre-pandemic in Asia you'd wear a mask if you went out. And travelling.

Yeah, totally. It's not mandatory. Maybe is that what she means? You don't have to wear it? But it was like, I understand I took it off when we were out on the side of the court and there was distance and open air and we were literally in a queue. And I thought, if this is the time to put on a mask, it's now.

This lady doesn't understand that you need to go to Disneyland in a few weeks. And you're not letting- Did you say to her- The window of COVID catching is closed. I'm done because I've got too much to do this week. Yeah. I'm in shed demo mode. Yeah.

I've got too much to do this week. I need to get that out of the way before. And then when that's done, I'm in shed demo mode I've got too much to do this week I need to get that out of the way before and then when that's done I'm in Disneyland window and if I get COVID and it means I can't go to Disneyland I will pack you've seen me pack a tent

I don't know if you've seen a full tent you might have seen a tent light no one packs a tent light this guy I will pack the biggest shit I'll cry so you can't get it this week I don't want it because I can't I don't want it you can't get it this week. I don't want it.

Because I can. I have to get it this week. If you're going to get it, you have to. If I'm going to get it, it has to happen this week. Or you're filming the Great New Zealand Cookie Show. What's it called? The Great New Zealand Cake Challenge. The Great New Zealand Baking.

Kiwi Bake Off. Yeah, that one. Starts filming in two weeks. So if I got it this week, I can recover. I just read an article being like, people don't recover in seven days, BT dub. And then after that, I hate to say it, but it may be popping overseas.

So I cannot. You can't get it. I cannot. Yeah. I don't know if that's how the virus works. I've calendared it a number of times saying this week would be okay, I guess. Right. So you've got a two-week window where you can't get it and you've got a one week.

One week. Yeah. I'm also pretty keen to still play the long avoid it altogether game. Oh, 100%. As best I can. And I understand that that's not possible. But is that possible? Is it?

But then how are some people not getting it? Like, you know, these people are like, oh, yeah, my boyfriend next to me, he's had it. I know. And I didn't get it. It's like, it's so crazy. I've been around COVID people and not had it yet. But I do feel like last week, so many of my friends got it. Yeah.

Like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. I'd say like a dozen of my close personal friends got COVID last week. The numbers are still pretty high. Yeah. Well, they're not proper numbers either, are they? No. Well, that's the thing that relies on self-reporting and how many people aren't doing that.

Yeah. Because my brother's kids had it and he didn't get it. Yeah. My sister had it. My mum and dad haven't had it. I'm just looking at that genetic thing. Like, are we an anomaly? Maybe it's the male gene in our family that...

Yeah, no one in my family had it. This is exactly the sort of talk people do just before they get it. I know. Let's just stop jinxing myself. Yeah. Jane and our family that... Yeah, no one in my family's better. This is exactly the sort of talk people do just before they get it. I know, let's just stop jinxing myself. Yeah. But if you do get it, man, prepare for a tantee. I almost swore just then. You did.

I will. If I don't get to go to Star Wars Celebration Day, I'm like, even when I get there, I'm going to be hard trying not to get it. Yeah. How are you going to not get it on the plane? I'm going to go full like firefighters breathing mask apparatus with oxygen.

Oh my god, but if you're heading to Star Wars Celebration Day, couldn't you put on a Darth Vader? Yeah. But then what if the COVID gets in the gap and then just circulates? Private jet? Hey, once you get there, you're fine. They don't care in America, right? There's no isolation. But I've got to come back.

Why can't I come back if I've got to come back. Yeah, but... Well, I can't come back if I've got to go in there. I've got to stay in Disneyland for a week. And then it's really, really mild and I feel fine. And then they're like, well, the next flight's three hours. I'm like, can we do it back to Disneyland? ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.