ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 11th June 2026

Episode Date: June 10, 2026

00.00: Intro 01.50: T-Rex Leather 04.45: 1 in 6 Women voluntary celibate 08.30: Top 6 - Election promises I want 14.10: Smart phones linked to the drop in birth rates 19.45: What bumps up someone's hotness? 27.50: SLP - Will you reorder your IG grid? 32.25: Hayley's manning up 38.00: Taylor Swift Toy Story 41.00: What is the small shameful thing you do? 53.40: Fact of the day 58.00: Love Island triangle bikinis 1.06.00: What are your parents still paying for? 1.14.30: Myths Millennials thought would make them rich 1.18.40: Not enough for the News News See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

from the ZM Podcast Network. This is... Fleshwon and Haley's Big Pod. Thanks to animates. Making happy happen for pets. Welcome to the show, Fletchhorn and Haley, Happy Thursday. Happy Thursday, I'm in a great mood because I think I've found the show's next silly purchase.

We've got our little corner with Herman the German, leading the way, Lady Die and some of the weird demonic animals. A taxi Dermede, Stillborn Lion Cup. So it never lived. Okay, you've got to stop this... He sent it to me? No, someone sent it to me. Oh, right.

Again, I'm not Haley's personal assistant just because she doesn't check all her D-Ms. He is, but he's not getting a cut. I do. Okay, well, I'll say to the listeners, please stop sending Haley Taxidermy. She can't afford to buy it. She can't afford it. She's doing a renovation. She is.

And you're just tempting her. Oh, gosh. I mean, it will be a good talking. I saw also yesterday there was a full, full taxi-dermy donkey. You want to tell me how I was supposed to? Oh, yeah, the Jerusalem donkey. A whole donkey. Fully, full size.

You could hire that out at Christmas to some churches. And it's just like, you're telling me that I'm not supposed to at least inquire as to whether or not I could wiggle that into the budget. Top six coming up on the show in its election season, so we're getting all these promises. Yeah, $20 a week maximum for public transport from the Labor Party. And 10 in the regions? Yeah.

So 20 in Auckland. Oh, 20 a week? Like, you would spend 20 a week. When Matt is out at 20 a week. I thought you meant they were going to give you 20 bucks. So all the trains. and buses. It maxes out at 20 a week, which is, you know, cool.

And then they were like $10 in the regions, and the regions are like, what's public transport? Yeah, they're like, is that where we all jump on the back of the Ute? Yes, that Kevin's truck? Yeah. Kevin doesn't charge us anything. He's just a good bastard. Well, I like the top six other election promises we might as well be making.

Next on the show, I have a story that will tickle both of you. Play Z-Ns, Flesh, Vaughan and Haley. Now, I have something that will tickle both of you. I'm ready to be tickled, arms up. Haley in the fashion department, and Vaughn and the Dinosort. department. Yeah. Because there is a collaboration between the organoid company,

Lab Growing Leather Limited and a creative agency that have developed in the UK the world's first T-Rex leather handbag. Discuss. So, T-Rex leather, have they, they've taken DNA from a, from a T-Rex and somehow repopated it.

Reptile-cated. Yeah, work on that. Work on that. Yeah, need some work. Repticalylated. I made it worse. The DNA into the skin of the dinosaur. Yeah, so it's built on previous research

that involved extracting a fragment of collagen from a T-Rex fossil which was found in 1988 in Montana, Montana, in the US. Where was the last time we found new dinosaur bones? Is that all happening on the region? Apparently that was one of the most complete specimens that was said to contain preserved blood proteins. Oh shit.

So it was really, it must have been in the mountains. Fresh end. Yeah, or a nice, maybe. No, it just would have been like the perfect situation of a T-Rex falling into a boggy. And then getting covered with something and it just sealed it all up. It would have been microscopic as well. So more importantly, so T-Rex, fantastic. More importantly, what shaped handbag are we going?

Were we going a tote? Are we going a satchel? Are we going, that's lovely. That's just a lovely classic sort of handbag. That's a classic. That's a lovely classic. So they coloured that or is that what they predict the... So a teal?

Would you call that a teal? You look at dark. I actually really like that colour. It's like a really... It's on. Like a deep blue rain. It's like those three vases that... I've actually got some.

I inherited them from my nan. Every house had them in the 80s. They were a collection of three vases and they're kind of like a weird turquoise teal dark blue at the bottom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Lovely colour. Well, I tell you what, if you want one... Yes.

It's only going to set you back between... 300 to 500,000 pounds. So, I'll say two then. Do you know what? So nearly a million. A funnel to know, I just looked this up. Their deadly ponies has a Mr. D-Rex that obviously maybe they've been inspired by because that colour is very similar.

Oh, that's just cow. They were quick on that, weren't they? That's cow. That's nice. I could see you with that. I could actually see me. That's a small, I'd sort of clutch, more of a clutch base. Yeah.

So as long as it's big enough, whatever you buy, as long as it's big enough to hold your shit. I don't want to, I'm not doing it. Well, where are us? We want to know me to put our battery, our portable battery charges. Keep one of those drug dealer man bags that straps across your chest. You won't believe the convenience it gives you.

Now, Moora Higgins, who I don't know, but Girlies, producer Girlies, Love Island, Shandog, you know, Mora Higgins, she was an original bombshell. She was one of the best, and she also won, didn't win but came right to the end of the last ena of Traders U.S.? See, I knew Shannon would just know the things that I didn't know about reality TV.

So Love Island fame and she was a bombshell, super hot gal and all that kind of stuff. She shared on her social media recently, she's gone viral for saying that she's been electively celibate for 18 months. Year and a half, no shaggin. Right, it's not like

she couldn't if she wanted to. Oh, she could get it. Sorry, what was her name now that Fletcher's given her the tape? Moira. I just the name. Moira. M-A-U-R-A. Why did I give it the tick? Well, you just said she could if she wanted to.

Well, I'm assuming she was on Love Island. They don't cast Mingers, do they? M-A-U-R-A-Higgins. The Māori-Me wants to say Moda. Let's call it Moda. Mota Higgins. She said, I feel great. I'm like a new woman.

She went boy sober, which is a term I absolutely love. She's boy-siber. She's like, I'm not doing it. You're boy sober, you've never. Oh. Oh, something's trying, She ever in the last 12 months? I'm boy tipsy. He's a little bit boy tipsy.

I'm boy one after work. Now, have you looked up, Moora Higgins? Yeah. Well, I can't imagine she's worn soap. She's on. No, she's British. She's a bit like... Yeah, she's Irish.

I wish nothing against I find the sort of your ginger hair, fair-skinned, green-eyed Irish. Fiddle me deep, fiddle anything. Fiddle me up. Right behind the ethnically ambiguous, to be totally honest. Yeah, right. Yeah, for sure.

Okay, so this is sparked a debate online about boy sobriety. Women in particular choosing voluntary celibacy and now it's reported around one and six women now identify as voluntarily celibate, just going, I'm actually taking a break from sex,

I'm taking a break from boys. Dating, all of that. All of it. do it, that's one in six versus one in ten men. So, like, homosexual men, you're all good, keep going. Heterosexuals, you're going to need to start banging each other because those numbers don't match up. Yeah, no, they don't.

You know what I mean? There's going to be a lot more men wanting to get at it, heterosexual men, than there are heterosexual gals. No, because I reckon the one in six celibate woman, not being voluntary celibate, will be equalled out with the incels. Yeah, I suppose. So, yeah, the people just not able to. Nature will balance.

So Chloe Kardashian's another great example. Four years of celibacy post Tristan Thompson being a dirtbag and cheating on her when she was pregnant. Four years. No way. She said no one is worth my time. Julia Fox, two and a half years in counting. She said, I just can't find anyone I want a f.

Whoa. She's like, can't. No. Yeah. Whoa, whoa. Yeah. People are saying the appeal is great. Less emotional labor. More time for personal growth.

discovery, not pouring relationship into energies that you don't feel you get back. And a Satisfire Pro 2. Satisfire Pro 2 does a lot. And it's quiet, you know? It doesn't leave a lot of stuff around. Although you do get pulled up at airport security quite a bit,

don't you? All the time. And I'm like, surely by now, this thing's been around for like over a decade, surely by now you immediately recognise it, you'd have a hundred of them coming through here a day. You would think Avesec security would have it in their X-ray data

to avoid it. Yeah, do a patch, do a patch update. And just be like, oh yes, SB2. And the machine should be like, girl, go get it. Play Z-N's Fletchhorn and Haley. From the Fletch Vaughan and Haley group chat, this is the Top Six. Good morning. Top Six election promises I want to see ahead of the election.

I guess Labor's got the first headline grabbing one about public transport, being maxed at 20 bucks a week. Yeah, because in the big cities, in the smaller regions, $10 maxed a week. Yeah. What would a bus cost now? Well, Auckland's already maxed at 50 bucks. So once you get to $50, that's on Auckland Transport. That's on 80, yeah.

But 20, 50's a lot. Yeah, it is. 20 would help so many people. Especially when we get them trains going. I might just train. We don't have it out by out. Man, I'd hoon the public transport. Every time I'm on public transport with you, I'm like, ain't this great?

It's just not out our way. We have fun, don't we. We have fun. If you guys let me start work at 6.30, I reckon I could public transport. Sure. No. No. I'm going to take Mondays off.

Do you want one day off a week as well? Yes, please. We'll stagger them. I'll just do Tuesdays to Fridays. And the occasional Thursday will take off as well. Well, no doubt we're going to be inundated with election promises because the election is sometime this year. Here they come. So here's the top six election promises I want.

Number six on the list subsidized cheese. And that's all cheese. All cheese. Blue. Grated. Just the house cheese. No, the pre-packaged grated. Yum.

No, no, not grated. He eats it like from the bag. It's got that coating. It's got the coating. Yum. Not the grated because we want to encourage New Zealanders to grate their own cheese. Yeah. Okay.

Every New Zealander needs to feel the slice of a knuckle. Yeah. You know what I mean? Hit that knuckle. No. Hit that knuck. Now you know you've got enough cheese. I've been buying the cheapest blocks of cheese.

Same. The home brand. It's just literally called cheese. Cheese. It's great. It's great. Yesterday. Pavealous.

Oh yeah, but it doesn't say what kind of cheese it is. It's just cheese. It's good stuff. That's good cheese. It's just cheese. Yeah.

Because it's the cheapest. It melts. It's all good. Yesterday I transported some out of the fridge for a little while. Yeah. Went very rubbery. Yeah, she goes shiny.

She goes shiny and rubbery. Sweety? Almost gets a sort of a glaze on it. I just couldn't get over the sponginess of the cheese. Yeah, yeah. I'm buying the cheapest cheese. I'm not going to be too judgment. It's all delicious.

Number five on the list of the top six election. promises I want to see are hovercraft lanes for your hovercraft. Well, I'll invest in a hovercraft. The electric vehicles are getting all the attention. Are there hovercrafts? There's some hovercrafts. Yeah, by the airport has them in case

I'd buy a hovercraft. They need them. Yeah. Get it a special lane to the water, take the water the rest of the way, drive it everything. Park it. Great idea. Number four on the list. Of the top six election promises I want to see, taxpayer trophies. I say we gamify

tax paying. When you pay $50,000 total tax, over however many years, you get a trophy. 100,000, more, bigger trophy. Love that. Half a million, you're getting like a nice big plaque. Maybe some of these huge corporations might be interested in paying some local tax. Yeah, they could be.

But their churches, technically. Well, those, but I was more meaning your Facebook's here. Oh, yeah, you know, feel free. You know, feel free. You can have a trophy. Yeah. Number three on the list of the top six election promises I want to see. I want to see a political party

getting behind fast-tracking that mower reincarnation. Yeah, we've got the DNA. You know that... Just talked about the T-Rex handbags. It's been made. Yeah. What's the name of the Colossus?

Is that the name of the company that's going around? Maybe we could get some mower ugs or slippers. But they were huge as well. They were like annihilate us. Yeah. I just feel like we're not living

in enough risk. Yeah. Every around us got bears, snakes and stuff. I don't mind if I was a three-meter-tall giant bird. Aggressive giant bird? Yeah, carry around your moor-stick. You can't get those drumsticks out the KFC drive-thru window? Nah.

No, they wouldn't even fit in your car. No. MFC will open a little bit. Yeah. Oh, no, it'll be C-FM. Kentucky Fried Mulla. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. I think a few people might have something to say about that. You've been one of them turkey drumsticks at Disneyland? No. This thing's massive. Yeah. They're big on that.

Number two on the list of the top six election promises, I want to see. I want to see some 501 deportations of possums back to Australia. Okay. If we can get back a gang member who left here at two weeks old. We'll take it. I reckon we send the possums back on a 501. And they love possums over there.

They do. Because they're not pests like out here. They're like, oh, they're so cute. I was like, get it gone. Get a gun on that thing. They're like, what? You're pulling on it. And number one in the list of the top six election promises I really want to see.

New Zealand is the third team in a state of origin. What's that? New Zealand and the third team and the state of origin. Australia's got the state of origin, the league. Yeah. We're the third team. So we get in an awesome state of origin.

I couldn't, yeah. The maroons, the blues and the blacks. I want more sort of like treats. You want treats? Yeah, like... Excuse me, this treat is for you. It's another chance to see very heavy in the fine men wearing tiny little shorts on a Wednesday night.

No, what I've come to learn is that they're all too young. Having seen rugby teams in lounges and whatnot, I'm like, where the old boys are? They're a break. Well, you don't want to go and watch some golden old old oldies rugby. Not bad old. Haley's down perving at the Golden Oldies tournaments. Yeah.

Come on, Graham. The Masters game. Yeah, we're the Masters at. There they are. That's what I stop six. The ZAM podcast network. Play ZM's Flashforn and Haley. There's a study out of the United

I got real tears out of that one by the way. That was really good, eh? Okay, we'll bring you in. We were just talking about if you, this was off here, this was not even, we weren't going to discuss this on here. Do you think a trait you find attractive in another person is reflective of your own insecurity? Yeah. Well, people always want what they don't have, right?

Yes, and that's the human condition, right? Yeah. I always remember like being a kid, because we were talking about hair, but being a kid, my best friend had curly hair, really thick, unmanageable curly hair. And I had this like pin straight. hair and she's like, I'd give anything. I'd be like, I want curly here. I know you do the switch. It's the freaky Friday.

I want to be short. I'd love to be a bit shorter. Everyone who's short, I'd love to be taller. Yeah. We were just saying like, do you think that you don't have to even be that hot, but if you had dark skin, light eyes, everything else was average as. You'd be hot and I said, I think women, no matter what else is going on, if they've got heaps of head hair, the hot. And then we talked about, is that an insecurity of yours because of your own hair? And then I did a fake cry and I got real tears out.

Here we are. It's hot. It's hot. It's good discussion. Behind the scenes we get it a bit deep and manifold here. Yeah, we're doing. Three genuine friends having genuine discussions.

Yeah, genuine discussion is like, do you think anyone with dark skin and light eyes is hot regardless of their... It's a five point bump. Oh, 100%. If you see someone, they don't even need to have, you know, be traditionally attractive, but if they've got dark skin and green, green eyes specifically, that might be a seven point bump.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Light eyes is a five point bump. Green eyes. Sparkly, emerald green. Like, yeah, the emerald. miles in the eyes there. That's a seven point bump. That's beautiful.

Hey, um... 96.96. What's your seven point bump? Yeah. Sure. You keep an eye on that. I'll keep an eye on that. So smartphones are being to blame out of two new...

Have some words. I'm thinking about dark skinned eyes. I don't blame you. She's flustered. Two new US studies are blaming smartphones as a distinct and yet largely ignored driver of plummeting global birth rates. So we know this, we know that Japan's having problems,

New Zealand's terrible with our birth rates. We're only just above Japan, by the way. Whenever we're new, Japan is like, the terrible problem of an aging population. We're literally just behind it. None of us are retiring 65 and getting government payouts. Like, that's not going to happen. No, and we're not having kids.

Like, we're feeding the machine. Yeah. They're saying, yeah, smartphones are linked to it. When they say smartphones, do they mean it's interfering the signals or the... No, no, no, no. It's just that we're on them. Yeah. Yeah.

So iPhone access... No one's banging out of boredom anymore. Yeah. You know, there's always those people banging out of boredom that were playing fast and loose with birth control. Yeah, I don't have gone on my wow. I love. So they say iPhone access is estimated to have driven as much as half of the entire U.S. birth rate decline between 2007 and 2011. a separate university

analyze 128 countries of different healthcare systems, religions and economies which all contributes as well. People aren't having kids because it's expensive. They found the same dip in birth rates since the introduction of the iPhone. And they do, they believe it's because phones replace in-person socialising.

So we're meeting each other less. We're banging less. We're getting out there less and having less sort of casual liaisons. The iPhone study was interesting because it was when it kind of first became big and it was only available on AT&T in America. Yeah.

So they worked out where those people were that had the phone. Really? And then that's how they kind of came to this conclusion that people became less social. Yeah, and the other two reasons they said that because you've got something fun to do at home. Yeah. Just be on your phone.

And the other is the easy access to porn. Yeah, yeah. A wank and a scroll. Yeah, totally. I mean like strolling on my phone, not like a cinnamon stroll. Soften it. Have some decorum.

It's a cinnamon scroll. A fiddle. A dittle in a dooms scroll. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. That's better. So it is literally like if we're on these things more, we're meeting people less, therefore we're having less sex, therefore there's less, I was going to say risk,

chance of pregnancy. Well, I'm going to have to go back to a Nokia 3310. Yeah, like you're struggling. You go back to an Nokia 3310. You're actually cutting. cutting it off. You will find a way. Life finds a way.

Yeah, yeah. A couple of seven point bumps reported. Oh, yes, please. Seven point bumps if they're a good dad. Yeah, hot. Like, good dad's hot. A five point bump if they've got a talent. Like if they, like, surprise you with, like,

painting or music. Yes. A talent is a five point bump. Oh, my God. Well, maybe we just, none of those were, um, physical. Oh, okay. Do you want to shuffle, shuffle the sheet a bit?

I want to shuffle the sheet. I want to shuffle the sheet. I think we could move the 7 o'clock to the 8 o'clock, move the 8 o'clock to the 8 o'clock to the 9 o'clock to tomorrow. Yeah. Or the 8 o'clock to the 9 to the tomorrow. Carmen, I hope you can take a notes here. We're going to go road. No, we're going to leave 9 where it is and 8 can be tomorrow.

Okay. Okay, well, a little behind the scenes peak of how the sausage is made behind the curtain. Next on the show, what's your point bump? Your 5 point bump. Your 5 point bump? Maybe it's a 3 point bump. We're going to be talking about what bumps people up on the, you know, out of 10 scale. The ZDM Podcast Network What's going on?

ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley This topic we're about to delve into We're about to put a foot into The pool of what gives somebody Some extra hot points Because we're not just talking about physical attributes But it could be It could be physical attributes

But we want to know what is What bumps somebody up a couple of points You know, there might not be... It's got to be funny People being funny Some people like If you don't have the face People get funny real quick

You know what I mean? If you've just joined us... If you've just joined us... This started because we were having an off-air chat. That if... Like, no matter what other qualities of your body or anything, if you've got dark skin and light eyes,

that's five extra points. That's five extra points. You're just like, boom, up you go. You're a two to a seven. Yeah, you're a two to seven. That's how quickly you can climb up by those two physical... Yeah, and then mine was,

if you're a girl and you just have heaps of hair on your head, that for me is at least a three bump. Yeah. You just like, you know those... girls are just like, I've got so much hair, just like... Curly hair's got to be a couple for me. Curly hair's a couple of them. You don't have that kind of hair.

I don't have that. I've got thin here and it's thin now and half of it's fake. You know, so it's thin and fake. It's like it shouldn't be. If you've just joined us, we covered before, somebody said a couple of messages in. Having a talent is a five point bump said Braden. If you're surprised, you're like,

oh my God, who painted this? They're like, oh, I did that. Yeah. And you're like, what? Like, talent. Or you're like, should we go, like, play a round a golf and they just smack it. And you're like, I've played got my whole life. Somebody actually messaged in someone being passionate about something as a couple of points.

Like someone having a passion that they can sit down and explain something to you with a passion. Even if I don't like it. Yeah. I don't care. Are we talking about hyperfixation, sort of a little, little, malady, little tizzy rabbit hole?

No, we're not. I was going to say a passion. A kiss of the tis. Yeah, really get into something. This is exactly what we want to ask and know this morning. 0800 at 10. Join the combo.

Text us, 9-696. What immediately gives you more hot points? I think you better say guns. I was like, maybe not. Hey, we're not yucking anyone's yum today. Jen, what gives somebody a points bump? First off, first time call a long-time listener. Love it, right in front of you, behind the candle.

He's got Bell blindness. Oh, that was literally hitting right behind the candle. There we go. Welcome. It's actually a medical condition, Bell's blindness. Right behind the palsy. Yep. Welcome, welcome

Welcome Jen, what gives somebody a bump? Thank you Thank you I think I think a guy that's got a best friend as a dog Oh yeah

Him and his dog are always Going on adventures and stuff Yeah totally He wants to pay more attention to the dog Yeah you're like that You're always like that Totally cute Yeah I follow a few guys on Instagram

Who are like adventurers Like outdoorsmen And they've always got a dog And you're always Yeah Yeah Got a swan drawing And the dog just comes

and jumps in the truck. But he's never going to love you as much as a dog, Jen. She likes that. That's okay. You like that? That's okay. I can be second to the dog. We can go on adventures together.

Yeah, what about a guy that has a cat best friend? Nah. Nah, it doesn't have the same. No, you can't take cats on adventures. It's an act. It's an act. All right, Jen, thank you. Some messages in.

Somebody said, I like when they're smart, like if they actually use their brain. Yeah. Or they learn? Yeah, and problem solving when they like to solve problems. Some of these are such a low bar. It just makes me wonder. When they can think.

No, I do love it when a guy's like, I was listening to this podcast the other day about and then they start, you know, I've been learning things. Yeah, as I was listening to this podcast the other day, Andrew Tate's got some great points on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stop.

I'll stop you there. Low bar here from Moran's Bulls up very own Mario who said when they've got their own teeth, that's got to be a couple. There are accents in here. Yeah. Oh, okay, yep. Yeah.

Someone said English accent, like, what the hell am I going to do with that? I mean, the Kiwi accent does go well overseas. I don't know why and how, but it does. Yeah, everyone's like, oh my God. And then you start like turning it up. You're like, yeah, ho. Yeah, or yeah. Oh, no, you're so Lord of the wrongs.

Whose daddy's good deal? Yeah, that's raw. Who's daddy, come here. Come here. Come sit on Denny's lap. It's always so jarring when you land back in New Zealand. You're like, God, do you sound like this? Men who can sing, that's got to be three points.

Having her own teeth. Yeah, that's four. Yeah. Somebody said when they're open and honest, very rare. Yeah. Oh, when they lift you up for the first time. And they're just like, brr. And you're just like, oh my God, I'm not on the ground anymore.

Easy. Oh, my God, I'm going to put me down. Oh, my God, I'm going to. Oh, don't put me down. When they pick you up, like, you're a piece of paper as well, and you're like, car out, man. Oh, I'm a girl. I can ride a dirt bike.

Is that a couple of points for anybody? I reckon guys When the helmet comes off And if you shook your head It'd be like Hello Or girls on skateboards Yeah

Yeah Yeah Oh when they look after their nail beds Oh yes A manicured man Yeah Or doesn't it be manicured though does it Yeah

Just least we looked after No you've got nice fingernails You've got great nails Both you have good hands Well we don't do any manual labour Yeah We sit here every morning

Pushing buttons Yeah Oh tattoos and in paint full places like the neck. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, you've suffered through that. Yeah, bad boy. So look that hot.

When you get close to them, you can smell them and they smell good. That's a couple of points. But it's not like smelling good. Like, not heavily perfumed. Not too heavily perfumed or radoxy. Just smell nice. Man in there. Yeah.

A trick with a lisp, says Paul. There are a few lady out there this morning. And you're looking to meet someone before. How much of a list? Blah blith. Fluffer and fuck of that. Yeah. So maybe just a little less, I don't know.

Or men with crinkly eyes. Oh, when they smile and they get the eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys got the crinkles all. Yeah, Jamie said that man who smiles easily and smiles with his eyes and gets a little crinkle in the corner of his eyes. That's five points. Manly hands and arms with juicy veins.

Ten points. I got told it the blood service this week I had a juicy vein. That's right, because you went for your bloody important meeting. Yeah, bloody important meeting. She said, that's a nice juicy vein. I said, you stop her. Someone said a blue shirt. Just a blue shirt

Well, Fletcher's Rung a blue shirt Three points Three points for me It's an eff in common sense It'd be nice That's a five point Again low bar for some of these

Yeah When her family's easy to get along with That's a couple of point bump Because you know you're gonna have to deal with them Yeah Now someone messaged in saying Where is this If they're a big booty

Latina with tan skin and light eyes Now that's not a butt That's just you're obviously hot We're just talking about Everything else doesn't have to be Excellent And if you're a big booty, what did you, how did they describe them? Big, uh, big booty Latina with tan skin and light eyes.

Yeah, and if she's a got, I mean, that's what you've got there is. Goss Betty. If you're a fat, got got a baddie, uh, from, that's just, I don't know what more to say. I don't think, I don't think you could ever travel South America, not in golf season. He'll have a seizure. Yeah. I just, you know what I mean? Yeah, I just, you know what I'm, you're like, you were right? And I was just like, I died, I died have it.

Someone said in uniform. Any uniform. Any uniform. Like, I'm like that when I see tradies at a bakery. What about a warehouse stationary uniform? Yeah, man. Yeah, man. That telling me you got a job.

You know, and I love that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I find a bitch lip and a slightly lazy eye quite attractive. A bitch. What is a bitch lip? Just like, slightly up, turn like a bit of a bitchy. Oh, my God. I'm going to know you could do a lazy eye.

Yeah. Holy shit. Do you want me to do it for the rest of the show? Just a bitch live and a bitchy. I'm crazy. You've gone too far now. Your acting degree has paid dividends. That's cast character.

Oh, that's hot, yeah. The ZN Podcast Network. Is this a show real? Play ZN's Flesh for an haley. Flechforn and Haley. Silly little poll. It's so silly, silly, silly, silly, that the silly little poll. Today's silly little poll.

Will you use the new Instagram grid reorder feature? Let me read what it says here. Reorder content on your grid. You can now choose the order your content. content appears on your grid. You can be able to pin two or three to the top for a while, eh? I've got three pinned, yeah. And I'm assuming you'll still be able to, or no,

you won't, it won't be redundant. Maybe you can pin in real, but you can grab like your hottest picks, you're like, oh, 2.30 in the grid and I've got all these new follow-up. You can drag that back up to the top so they can see you at your hottest. But it will still, it says that it's not going to affect the original publication date of your content, so it's still going to say 2021. Yeah. Right. So if you're going to arrange by date or arrange by preference.

It just means if you are checking out someone's hot photos, you need to just do a date check because they could be using their skinny hot photos from 2021. So they're saying it's, because I was like, they were saying, oh, you could put your best performing video at the top. You could already do that with the pin. But they're saying you could arrange things to build a stronger visual first impression for new followers.

So you come on, you know, because sometimes your feed gets a bit scattery. Yeah. Come on and I can see what you are. I've never had a curated grid. I'm just like, no, neither. I said, oh, I'm going to do one of those ones where I put up photos every buck. I just, I keep forgetting.

I've got a bit of a social media update. I had a big 24 hours. Real. A social media update coming up soon. More on that, soon on the show. Yeah, yeah. So we asked if you're going to be using this to reorder the grid. 13% of people say yes, but 87% of people said no.

Yeah. I think a lot of people will. I think once they know what it is. Yuck. Anonymous, please. It'll be chronological all the way for me. Also, I'm about to do that big archive that you do after ending a 10-year relationship. Yes I didn't really post my ex-relationship

So do you I don't know how that works And I'm not going to Because it's just like It was part of my life right And I'm not going to ignore that it happened It did But what do you do?

Can you do it so you archive it So your followers can't see it But it's still there I guess if you wanted to keep it Okay I don't know I'm sorry to hear about the energy relationship Messenger

What happened? Oh I was saying to the messenger Oh We know exactly what happened It's fun Anyone will walk away from that Leisha said I can barely imagine all the social media shit as it is so how much is it is I reorder the grid

into it that's the thing if you've got like a couple hundred pies you get a few in and you're just like I don't know I'm bored Go on to reels and scroll somebody else's content for a few hours My grid is my grid and that's the goddamn order Okay So I can put my ex at the bottom where he belongs Says Megan he's attached to the other pictures

That I don't want to delete unfortunately Yeah can you go through now and edit post and if it's a carousel, delete a few of them? I don't know. I think that's been a thing for a little while. I'll go to a recent carousel. So, I am far too old

millennial to even know what this means. And girl, I'm tired, says Danielle. Yeah, you can delete them. You can go into an old carousel. Okay, so if you have a carousel of a holiday and you want to get rid of a couple of photos of your ex, easily done. You can do that. Good. That's way too much. Admin, says Nikki.

It can stay as it is. Natalie said, I give zero shit, so what my grid looks like. That's the attitude. should. I recently, I realized recently I didn't upload Picks from a solo trip I did and I wanted to post it soon but hated the idea of it being way out of order of my grid. So heck yeah, I'll post it now

and then put it into chronological order. Okay. Yeah, that's good. The first thing I'm going to do a posthumous trip upload and then put it back into my chronological order. I like that aspect of it. No one's going to notice or care though, apart from you. But they said go the gram looking out for us, OCD Queens. Yeah, oh, okay, well that explains a lot.

Yeah. My Instagram is my personal photo album. It's there for me to remember. If it wasn't chronological, I'd be very confused about how old I am and what I've been doing. I love that. That's the way I treat Instagram. Like a photo album. Me too, like a little memory bag. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

And also for followers and like sort of like likes and laughs and stuff. And for validation. Yeah. Okay. From strangers. From strangers. Yeah. His opinion matters too much to me.

Like me, like me. Love it. Love it. Push the button that says love. Don't be mean to me. So, this little poll, will you use the new Instagram grid reorder for? feature are only 13% of you are going to.

The Z&M Podcast Network. Play ZDM's Flash, Forne and Haley. Yesterday, my cat's been a prick recently. We've talked about this. He's been coring things, like, howling for food. Then I went away and my neighbour fed him, and he overfed him. I mean, I'm grateful

for the service. But like, maybe your cat and my cat have had some kind of freaky Friday transition, because my cat has been so well behaved. Yeah, but you've been, haven't you been, um, dosing him up on that? relaxant from Fell away. I got it from

your show sponsor. From our manamates. It's a synthetic cat hormone. Feramone and I've got two diffuses in the house. I'm going to go on out. And a spray.

Remember that's what you need. I heard him sprawled. I heard him claw the camp at once and I erupted in a like a dad rage of the 80s or 90s. And he looked at me like I was a volcano erupting in the lounge.

That's what you want to do. I think it's scared the shit out of it. I mean my cat won't let him touch me but he will not scratch the furniture. Yeah. Rale has never been a scratcher. But just the rugs, man, they're getting like... The lounge one, the most expensive one in the house.

He's being a bright. He's a cute dog outside. Oh my God. You can't bring a golden retriever in here with a stick. He's going to stick. He's a blondie one. That's so cute. Bring the dog.

Bring the dog. That dog's actually feral about that stick, though. The new coffee guy has tried to, like, grab the stick off the dog, and he's not happy about it. Excuse me. Can we get a cute picture of the cute picture the cute dog. Excuse me.

Bring the dog. Later. I'm still logged on to the FVH account. I'm going to go over to the window and get a, if you want to see the cute dog, I'm going to put it. Yeah, that's kind of, it's kind of derailed us. Hi, oh my God, we're talking about your dog. It's lovely. Oh, he's so cute.

It's a good boy. Oh, yes. Oh, my God, the dog's coming over. Hey. Oh, my God, he's running with the stick. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, he's a good boy.

Hi. Hi. Oh, my. Oh my best boy! He's a good boy. That's so cute. Okay, well that will be on the Instagram just so you can feel a part of

how amazing that dog is. Oh my god, that dog's beautiful. I was going to be photos and running around with the stick and then when it saw it sat down in front of the window you've got to see this pose on our socials, FVHZM are the dog we're currently tag.

Obsessed with. Tag them. Oh my God, cute. Maybe I should just get a dog and get rolling. Get rid of a dog. Okay, so that dog's got to stick and like, yes he's going to shower. Shannon wants to meet an air drop

do her so she can post it with the show font. No, what, comic sands? Like, go against the man. Yeah, yeah, comic sense. I'll teach you. Howard's jaws on the floor. What's the name of the show? Like, there's so a guy.

We're taken over. And spell H-A-L-E-E-L-E. Like, do something crazy. It's liver little, guys. We have a show. Apparently we have a show font. Oh, right. Or you drop the A out of Vaughn as well.

Like, let's just go crazy. No, do comic sands. Did you tell me what the show font is I'll Google and say from half the time? No, no, do comic sands. I was going to do the things, us older millennials do that. Big capital letters thing. No, no, even I'm icked. No, get the background off that.

I'm yuck. Sorry, I'm 10 years younger than you guys. Not me. Close. So, anyway, so I get home yesterday. Speaking of animal, I can't stop looking. Okay, we'll just come back to that. I'm going to put hashtag not the show font.

Yeah, great, great, perfect. Just so Shannon feels distanced. Okay. Get home yesterday and I, behind the table, on the wooden floors I will say, thankfully, behind the table I could see all this kaffaful. And I thought, because there's a flower, some flowers on the table, I thought, you know, flower petals had dropped off because there's so many. I was like, let's rattle these flower petals.

I get closer. It's feathers. And there's a sparrow absolutely torn apart. And this used to be a job that I wouldn't do. Not my problem. Do you know what I mean? But I had to step up. And so I got a plastic bag, put it over my hand, then put the sun.

sleeve over, then put a bag over there, then got paper towels. And I was like, pick it up. It was in three parts. I was going to pick it up. I just hate the feeling of the body in my hand. Yeah, yeah. And I pick up. Don't you have a brush and shovel? Yeah, but that's for brush and shoveling. I don't want the corpse of it. Like, it had eaten the guts. Didn't hit it with the vacuum? I vacuum the feathers.

I am, but not the guts. You don't want some internal organs floating around your dyson. Yeah, so there was organs everywhere. Cyclonic guts power. Yeah, the worst bit was. the bulk of the body was to get a head torso vibe. I picked it up by what I thought was the torso and I picked it up and as I did I went,

I moved like this and the head was still on the ground. The head came off. And I had to pick up the heads. Yard. Now that gone retriever would never do that to me. Oh my God, he's having a puppuccino! He's having a papuchino! It's a video on the socials with not the show font.

It's a picture on the socials here. It's on the FVHZM story. Okay, we'll go and check that out. Maybe also your thoughts on the show. show font on shifting from the show font to the font I just used. The girls are. I used bubble. Upset. It was the closest I could find in comic sans.

Bubble. 966. No, comic sans is in there. Yeah, big fan. So far, great response on the show. I might put up a poll. KPI's. Shannon does not like you having the social media logins.

We have a show font KPI's, bitch. He's having a show font will directly result in higher KPI's because I think we should be using bubble. Yeah, me too. It's friendly. The ZDM Podcast Network. The rumor is Taylor Swift will get married

Independence Weekend at the New York venue Madison Square Garden. Yeah, one of the biggest Gardens or Garden? Garden. One of the biggest venues, sports games, basketball games,

comedy, concerts, everything. And the rumor is there was no special deal for her. She's paying, she doesn't get mates rates despite the fact... Special deals to people that can afford it.

Well, despite the fact that she's sold out Madison Square Garden before, many times and performed there a lot. You know, this is the home of concerts, basketball games, the whole lot. Mm-hmm. A million dollars a day. That is how much her wedding venue is costing. A million dollars. Me saying, but, like, that's not ridiculous.

But when you hear about celebrity weddings and how much they cost, like, didn't we talk about this? How much was Dua Leapers wedding? The big one that she had, it was 1.8 million. What? U.S. So, how high at the venue? For everything, the three-day Sicilian wedding celebration.

Oh, yeah. But we said, she also gave all of her guests 12-piece La Crescette. Le Crescette. Yeah, so. Also, I thought it was La Crescée because they soften the tea. If there's like two T's in an E or if there's rules. Oh, but if it's just a T. I think it's Creset.

It's like Moet and Shandon. I say Moe. I know, but that's basically. It's Moet? It's Moet. I'm just so, I'm trash. You just stick to your aquil. I'm trash.

You have your passion pop fizz. You know I will. Yum. You know what I will. It's easy to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah, easy to say. Am I saying mum right? Mum.

Can we go through all the champagne brands and you guys tell me where I've been going wrong? Like, Lerreve-LPRIA. Yeah, I don't know. Don, Pongong. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I'm back on track. And this is why we won't ever be invited to a $1.8 million wedding.

Because we trash. Yeah, yeah. Speaking to Tatei as well, did you guys see, because Toy Story 5, she wrote her song, I knew it, you knew, I knew it, you knew, you knew it, you knew you. I knew it, I knew you. I knew it, I knew you, which is her original song written for the movie.

Yeah. So she made a surprise appearance at the Toy Story 5 world premiere. Oh, wow. And was joined by Randy Newman and sung this. The classic Toy Story song. You got a friend in me. With the Randy Newman, you got a friend in me. Wow.

Isn't that cute? That's Randy on the piano with her. You got a friend in me. So she sang that, but she also sung a new song, I knew it, I knew you, which she wrote for Toy Story 5. Released last Friday? Yeah, last Friday. How cute.

I imagine just being at the Toy Story 5 premiere and then, you know, the most famous woman in the world. Yeah, it just pops up. But comes and sings two songs with Randy Newman. Go Teitee. But I'm kind of, I want to hear Randy Newman's thing. You got a friend of me. He did.

You got a friend of me. Why is your Randy Newman's tongue to bit? You got a friend of me. Play ZM's flesh, for him and haley. Shameful things that we do. The little habits, like having two biscuits instead of one, and then all day you're like, should have only had one. Yeah, it's not a thought I have often.

Yeah. Maybe calling into one. work sick when you're not sick. Yeah. Don't do that. Don't feel bad about that. Forgetting to reply to a text. Yeah.

And then you're wrapped with guilt around it. That's a match you let it pile up. And then they have to sit down and have like a reply session. Yes, I'm a bit like that at the moment. And then you get it and you send it back and then they send you one more and then you send it back. And then there's nothing and you're like, it's okay. You're overwhelmed. Yeah, yeah.

So the studies out of the UK and it's leaving people up at night because they're absolutely guilt-wracked. four-fifths of people admit to feeling bad over things they really shouldn't like taking time out for themselves almost a third dwell on cancelling plans taking too long to reply to a text or dodging a neighbour or friend to avoid unwanted chit-chat Oh, I do that!

For sure. I haven't done it to you guys but I've got some close no, not close friends, friends that I'd see and I'd be like, oh, I'm not on the motion batteries like on 1% I just got to get home. Yeah. I'll do it. I'm ignoring phone calls.

And even if it's from friends, just be like, I don't have the mental load for that. Okay, when it comes to food, people feel very guilty, almost a quarter regret saying yes to a slice of cake, having two biscuits instead of one, and ordering a Friday night takeaway or a meal at night when they could have cooked.

Oh, yeah, when you got food in the house and you order takeaways, that was me yesterday. Having a fridge clean out, I'm always just like, I actually got really good at it. There's not a lot of waste in my house. Oh, I'm shameful, yeah. But, yeah. Okay, here are some other small, shameful things people feel.

Staying in pajamas past 10 a.m. at the weekend. Yes. Not calling parents enough? Yes. Eating chips. 27%? No. Feel bad about eating chips?

Do you feel bad when you slam a whole bag of cheese balls? Absolutely not. No, yeah, because guilt's for the week. Gilds for the week. It is. So this is what I want to ask this morning. Is there a small, shameful thing that you do? that, you know, you'll just, you'll be, it's just there.

It's in your head. Someone said I spend our McDonald's reward point, like our family's McDonald's reward points and weed little treats for myself during the week. So my wife doesn't see any of the transactions coming out of my accounts. Can't stay away from a McFlurry. I love that.

I get it. How many accrued points have they got? I suppose if they're a family and so every time they go and they get in order. Oh yes, that's so good, two, three, three. Okay, well, you should feel guilty. for doing that two, three, three. Okay, to find out what two, three said, stay tuned to the show.

We want to know the small, shameful things that you do. Because a recent study has shown that Brits, people in the UK, are just up late at night, just thinking and have all this regret over these tiny little things like, let it go, move on. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but the little guilt. I mean, we're getting some of those messages in, you know, like someone who pees in the shower. I pee in the shower, almost a hundred percent of the time. See, I don't feel guilty about that. because there's nothing wrong with that.

And that's actually saving water. Exactly. Because it's good for the eczema. Kelly. Kelly, what's the small, shameful thing that you do? Oh my God, I've been waiting for this topic. Have you? Get it off your chest, babe.

That sounds serious. So my husband leaves his toothbrush in the sink every time he brushes his teeth. Wait. He just raw dogs. He just drops it in the sink. Yeah. doesn't like wash it and then it leaves that like white rim of gunk

yeah yeah yeah you know sitting in there. Kelly? Every day. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Yeah I know but I don't feel bad when I grab this toothbrush and clean the entire sink with it. Oh. Around the plug.

Wait a second. That is not a small shameful thing that you do. That is a big shameful thing that you're done. Wait but hang on. You're using it to clean off his own toothbrush scum. Yes, but then everything else. Do you love it? This is outrageous.

I feel bad doing it, but then afterwards I'm like, no, I now have a clean sink. Now, Kelly, do you wash a toothbrush after you wash the sink with it? Yes, and then I put it back in the holder. So you've got a... It is wild behaviour that he's just like, manbrush, tooth drop, like, rinse it and put in the holder, isn't he? Yeah, he's an animal. Yeah, so I don't feel bad, but I do, but you know, I don't. It's a little shame.

Well, we did ask for these small shameful things. But do you feel bad about it? Obviously, you feel a little bit of shame about doing that. I do. I do when I do it, but then afterwards, I don't. This is so wild. It's really nice. I love it, Kelly.

I love it. Okay, well, so, you know, maybe he should put the toothbrush back in the holder. Maybe he's bloody well short. I hope he hears this. Barla, good morning. Good morning, guys. What is he? small shameful thing that you do?

Okay, so for some context, my partner works from home all day, and he really misses me when I'm off at work. Oh, that's cute. But I love having a little bit of scroll time, some doom scroll, if you will. So my small, shameful thing is sometimes I'll fake having a really sore tummy so I can go to the bathroom for a wee bit. And I just sit there for like an hour. Do you have a kid?

Yeah. rolling through my stuff for some peace and quiet. Yeah, don't. And I just feel a bit bad for it, actually. Do you have kids? No, no, I don't have. You're just escaping him when you go to the bathroom for an hour. Yeah, yeah.

So I'm training up for motherhood, just the whole escaping thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because there have been some messages and moms will do this and just fake having something so they can just go. Oh, come out to sit on the toilet for a bit. Or just sit in the car and do something for them. Yeah. I think this is okay. As someone who values my own time, I get it.

And if your husband or your partner works at home, are you got a stage five clunger or in a husband there, Bauer? Sorry? You've got a stage five clunger. Is he always like obsessed with you? Everywhere I go, unless I say I am taking some toilet time, you know, bio has a dog be in there, happy at my feet.

And I'm like, scroll, let me go on Sweetport and Haley's Instagram and watch all my stories. Thank you. That's a little bit. KPI. I'd pop along to that. Instagram, if you're having this morning, Balah, we've absolutely hijacked the show font.

It's bubble now. Yeah. We've got some real cute Instagram stories of dogs. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you. My scroll time, I will enjoy that. Yeah, go on you, you go. Yeah, fake a sore tummy for that.

I actually think you've got a sore one coming on maybe later this afternoon, Balah. Yeah. Yeah, I might have to call out six, you know. Yeah. Oh, wow, there it is. Thank you, Balo. Some messages in your small, shameful things that you do. We tease what 233 said, the small shameful thing, flushing a tampon.

every now and there. So bad for our water system. So bad. Don't please don't do it at my house. Because I'm on a septic tank. It's real, real bad for me. Yeah, so bad. I'm on an old system.

You're on an old system. You had to have a macerator because your dumps were so. I've got a tampon and poo smoothie maker at the back of my yard. Yeah. To moolly it all up. It's going to shoot it out into the old surrog system. Does it? Okay, yeah.

But if you... The pune's ruled... No, no, no, no. Screw it up. The first time I did a colon prep for a colonoscopy and I was, I was flushing what? and I jammed it and the guy came in and was like, no.

They don't moly. They don't moly, yeah. Someone said, my little, shameful thing I do, I eat raw sausages and bacon. Oh, that's really bad. Not the whole pack of it, but just like one of it.

You shouldn't eat raw pork. Dude, don't eat raw. What are you doing? Unless it's those Hellas ones that are steamed and pre-cooked. Pre-cooked? Yes, you're going to eat those. Because you're only ever rolling around those

on the barbecue to warm them up, but you shouldn't eat raw. No. What are you doing? Microwave it at least. I'm forever stealing my kids' chocolate and lollies. Yeah, good. A little feel guilt about that.

I feel shame at the end of the workday. I've got a dirty mug and the dishwasher's full. I just chuck it in the sink. You do that. Or you do that. But I always go, oh, it's full. Oh, it's full. Yeah.

I go it's full without actually opening it to sit. Yeah. Damn it, it's full. Yeah. I don't get takeaways for my kids, but there's a KFC across the road from my supermarket of choice and sometimes I'll smash. your popcorn chicken on the way home from getting the groceries. Yum. You've got to wind down the windows

at the last K, otherwise there'll be some residue. Yeah, yeah. That smells undeniable too. Yeah. Calling in sick when I'm actually sick, I spend all day feeling guilty so I can't enjoy my time off. You end up cleaning the house to be productive. That's a deeper issue. You need to see a counsellor. A lot of people said in the study that they feel bad calling in sick.

But I thought COVID changed that around because everyone was like, I don't want you in here if you're sick. No, but they're calling in sick when they're not sick. No, but this person says when they take their sick days when they are sick, they've got guilt. Yeah, yeah. That's a millennial thing. No, no, no, no, no one else cares, mate.

I wake up at midnight and have a cheeky half a block of Whitaker's caramel. You're all good. It doesn't matter after midnight. Yeah, I can't be honest washing my hair, so I just tied up most days and not wash it once or twice a week. It's actually quite long, so it's a lot of admin to wash. I feel a little bit guilty about that. Someone said, I feel guilty sometimes older indoor gardening by myself.

Now that's a term for playing with one, so. And then when my husband wants to partake together, I say I'm not in the mood. Oh, yeah, that's not good, is it? I already, no. I take tampons from the free bin at work. That's all right. That's all right. I'm a shame to say when I'm out in about, I'll use the disabled toilets if I need

to poop. I don't want anyone to hear my plops. And I can't hold for 30 minutes in a cubicle to wait until the main toilet's empty. Oh, so they use a separate access toilet. Yeah. I get that. Somebody said, I do that same thing as Kelly does with her husband's toothbrushes.

I'll do it with my kids' toothbrushes because they leave them all around haphazardly. Wild. I get up at 5.30 most days to go for a run, but every now and then if I'm tired, I'll get dressed into my running gear, but go back to bed in the spare room until 7 and then get up and pretend I've been for a run. I love that. I eat my wife's baking stuff, like chocolate chips and sprinkles and stuff. I'll just pull them straight in my mouth. Yum.

I feel a little bit guilty about that. Yeah, I love that. That's like teenage behavior, eh, when mum's at work and you're just like, oh, I'm going to have some cooking chocolate. Yeah, or I'm going to microwave some ice. Bread and cheese. Yeah, make icing in a bowl, make icing. My husband likes to call on yap at me every lunchtime about tradesman stuff I don't understand. So I'll wink at a co-worker and that means she calls my phone and I say,

oh gosh, babe, I've got to go a client's call. I feel a little bit guilty about that. Why not? I will fold up my man's dirty undies that he leaves on the floor and put them back in the drawer. So he's wearing dirty undies just because it's like, I'm not washing that. If you couldn't be bothered putting it in the wash. Yeah, fair enough. Okay, I saved a couple because I feel like they're not like small, shameful things.

I think they're actually, you need to take a good, hard, long look at yourself. Okay. I'll piss in the sink while I'm brushing my teeth. Do you reckon that's the same guy who then just drops his toothbrush in the sink? I'm sorry, what? I've seen a thing once and it was desperate. Out of pure desperation, but if you're in your own house, go on, Haley, go on. I was at a party and sometimes.

Someone was using the toilet and I was seconds away from wearing my own pants. And so I went in, it was a friend, and I just pissed in the same. It's fine. Years ago. That's fine. That's one. That was a one off and it was in the right moment. This person does it just when they're brushing their teeth.

Wait, wait, wait. If you're more. Once I peed in the bath when Jess was on the toilet. Was the bath in the same room as the toilet? Yeah. Did you pull the kerth? And once I would, no, I can't say that when it was too full on. Yeah, don't.

I reckon you've said it. Yeah. I reckon you keep doing the whole. For the rest of the day, I reckon. Once, I was on the toilet and she needed to throw up and so I just made space.

Haley? This is your best friend. Christ, alive. I told all these stories at a wedding. That's a disgusting. I met Steve yesterday at the field days at the Genesis tent and he's like, Haley's not afraid to tell things,

is she? That's exactly what your dad said. Yeah, that's what my dad said. She doesn't hold much back, does she? Now we've just had chapter 84 and 85 of the Haley There's no one. Stop talking, but.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, One and Haley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Ah, do do-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-too. Do-d-d-d-d-do-too. Today's fact of the day In Fungus Week And Fungus Week so far we've had large mushrooms

We've had poisonous mushrooms We've had hallucinogenic mushrooms And giant, giant sprawling underground mushrooms Yeah, the biggest living organism on Earth is a mushroom We've established that we all love mushrooms Today I want to talk about a mushroom that lives Where nothing else can live At Outerchew

Space No Where is a zone? Underwater. No, not underwater. Desert. Pardon me? Desert?

No. In the cold? No. Antarctica. No, I see because I said it aren't fine. It's a situation where life has been made untenable due to... Chernobyl. Tunble.

Tunable. I've been there. I've been there. You've been to Chernobyl. I've been to Chernobyl. And that's where he glows. It shows. Yeah.

It glows in the dark. I glow a little green. He goes there a little bit. So today's fact of the day is that there is a fungus that grows inside the Chernobyl reactor. Oh, okay. Yeah. So researchers first documented the fungus in 1991, some five years after the nuclear meltdown, because they'd pop in. And they said, there's mold-like patches spreading across contaminated surfaces.

So a Ukrainian microbiologist said there are 37 species of fungus thriving in the Chernobyl red zone. Is it called the red zone? Yeah, which is really close to the reactor. Yeah. Kind of the epicenter. So they're dark and black and rich in melanin. And they've taken one, the one that grows the closest to it and studied it. And they said, so the melanin is the same molecule that colors the human skin in here.

Yes. And it's. So it makes delicious brown people deliciously brown. Deliciously brown. Yeah. So they said the plants use chloroform to capture energy from visible light. this fungus uses it to capture energy from gamma rays. Like the incredible Hulk themselves.

Yeah, so three melanin, melanin, melanin, am I saying that right? Melanin, I've said it too many times now. It doesn't sound like a word. The three melanin-containing fungi grew faster and gained more biomass and exposed to radiation 500 times higher than background radiation. Wow. So they are literally, there's fungus that are feeding off the nuclear waste at Chernobyl. There's animals and stuff around as well still.

Is there? And the exclusions. People live there as well. They refuse to leave, eh? Well, there's two. Yeah, there's workers that come, but they can only stay a certain amount of time before they have to leave the exclusion zone.

And then there's ancestral homes. And people are like, I'm just not leaving. I don't care. I'll live in the radiation zone. Sailor V, basically. Yeah. And they do. They love that they witch song as well.

Yeah, yeah, so you will say why. Yeah. So then in 2020, NASA was just like, This is interesting for us. They flew a layer of this fungus to the International Space Station to test it against cosmic radiation. And it's an ongoing study, but they said the idea is that when we go to deep space travel, this fungus could be like a living shield that grows self-repeers

and buffers the radiation for people behind it because it absorbs it on the way through. Oh, so we cover the spaceships and mushroom. Yeah, so when we're going through space and the cosmic radiation will be absorbed by the fungus. And then when we re-enter the atmosphere, it'll cook it up nice so we can eat it. In an omelet. In an omelet. So much chili oil. Yum.

Yum. And then we'll eat it and we'll live forever. So today's fact of the day is there's a dark black fungus growing very close to the Chernobyl Nuclear Moutdown site. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Do do do do do Play Z-Ns Flash One and Haley

Social media news actually Because you may remember I'm going to have a busy day today You may remember I was locked out of my own TikTok account Because I was posing as Haley Sproul And they needed you to prove Yeah that I was her

And if I was posing as someone else I would have chosen someone way better Way richer Hotter Hotter Yeah Richer just bigger Everything

Yeah And then they were... You sent in your like passport, right? Yeah, but they were having this app thing and it wasn't accepting it, so I'd go through an email thing and then they emailed me, but then before I could email back,

they said too many emails so they cancelled the... I was just so over it. The TikTok support is rubbish. And you can take that direct to them. So I looked at my social... Oh, my TikTok following because I don't ever use it

and I had like a few videos on there and stuff and I looked at my TikTok and I want to start focusing on it because I do want to be a comedian full time. Okay. You want to leave us and get famous. I want to leave you and go to bed. And I... We pulled up at the lights at the same time today, Haley and I looked at her and she looked at a man.

She gave me this thumbs up that was on the thumbs up. And I was like, there's a woman who's ready to chuck at them. Ready to chuck her. But her mortgage says keep coming. So I knocked at my following and I had like 3,000. Whereas I've got like 70 on Instagram. So I was like... Must be nice.

It is. What I did, I just like, I'm going to delete it and start again. So I deleted Haley Sprow LNZ And then I tried to get Haley Sproul and that's been taken by someone else So the first bit of social media news is I've started a new TikTok It's at Haley Sprow Comedy Go follow it because I've got like no followers

This is TikTok, okay Not Instagram Today I'm going to be posting every clip I've ever posted online So it's all going to go in there Can we go to our social media Desk? Is this a good play Just a dump To do a content dump

to catch up on all the old stuff or should she drip feed it? So generally, once you've got momentum, you're on fire. Yeah. Having a look at your account currently, I'm not sure the fire has been lit yet. No, but this was only last night. I'm filling her up. Yeah, it's kind of like once people start engaging,

if you engage back with them, then the algorithm's like, oh, she's doing good. Call me back and all that kind of stuff. Are you going to have to take some time to... Especially when they're mean to me. It's also... When that guy called me a buffalo with a microphone. You know, like I don't really know.

know how to engage with that. Like I know it doesn't sound like a real job, but there's a reason it's a whole industry working in social media. I know, but I don't want to pay, you know, so it's sort of, I'm sort of stuck there. Yeah. But so I've got a new TikTok

at Haley Sprowecoe today, right? And today I'm just going to dump everything there to get the momentum and then I'll do the engagement and stuff. That's TikTok, I don't really care about it. And then I went on Instagram and there was a little notification for me and open up my Instagram. Open up my Instagram now. Are you guys open up my Instagram at Haley Sprow?

Open it up. What do you notice? I'll open it up on desktop. What do you notice? Because I am. What are you are? 44 years old. At Hayley Sproul, what do you notice?

Okay, well she's got a blue tick. Yeah. Oh, is that it? It was last night. How did you get a blue tick? They message me. They message you. They messaged me.

Said, do you want a blue tick? I get the freebie one. Isn't that nice? So you're not paying. That's even better. So TikTok was telling me I'm not Hayle Sprout. And Instagram was like, hello, Haley Sprague. You are, little blue ticky wiki.

You are. I know, so huge things are coming afoot. penning my email to Marty. I'm out of here. As soon as a social media pops up. You're out of here. You're out of here. You're resigning. This 4 a.m shit. I'm out. Right. How's that going for you so far?

You've got no followers on TikTok. Yeah. And I posted a video yesterday and like, no engagement. So. You'll be here a bit longer. Probably be here. Well, at least we'll just get to Christmas, I reckon. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flash for Unhaler. Millennials, we're going to remember this.

Love Island, which is on at the moment, that I have bravely decided to opt out of this year. Yeah. It takes a lot of strength. Thank you so much. Yeah. Actually really feel seen by you. They have brought back what they're calling

the ultimate millennial clothing item. Now, producer girlies, I know that you, Shandog, are you watching this season? I'm actually not for once. Wow. Brave. Again, terrific strength. Producer Carwin?

No, I'm not, actually. You'll be relieved forne, because we won't be talking about it. Good. Love Island is just a little too often for me at the moment. Yeah, it's a huge commitment. It's a big commitment. It's a big commitment. And you know that once you watch a few episodes, you're hooked,

and then it's like, this is a full journey. Okay, so have you seen this? Do you remember, if I say to you, triangle bikini? Oh, yeah, girl. And I don't mean triangleism, like the little ones that are like triangle bikinis, like it's the shape of a triangle. I mean, the brand triangle without an e, because that's what makes it funky.

Okay. Triangle. Triangle. Triangle. Triangle. Neon neoprene bikini with the black outline. You would have seen these. Oh yeah, I remember those.

2010s maybe? Perth. Yeah. Pervid. Hey. Trust. Please. I didn't oggle.

I didn't Google. I didn't Google. I didn't gogle. So Trinity. I just remember them being a thing. You remember them. Trinity has on Love Island has been wearing one of these on Love Island. now.

Okay. Now. And that's what, making people like, oh, I would have one of these. People are just like, oh my God, these things. I never had one. I don't think I had one

because I didn't used to have boobs before he got away. I had a dupe. I didn't have the real one because the real ones were like $200 and that was crazy. But these are practically the worst bikinis ever

because neoprene is not good for our lady garden. Wait, is neopreneurine wet soup material? Yeah. Wait, that's made out of wet suit material. Yeah, yeah. It's stiff and it's stiff. and it's thick

and it only does a very certain boob shape a favour. Yes, it was not for a normal girl and then yeah, for your... What boob shape does it do a favour? Just fake ones. You would ask that. Fake roundies.

Yeah, perth. What a perth. Just very like high round ones, not a natural... High round top, no drop, no density loss in the top. But it's just really, really bad for your girl to be in neoprene.

We're talking downstairs now, aren't we? The downstairs needs to breathe in there, Prince. Can you poke a few holes in? You could ventilate it like you've brought home a lizard in a box. Do you know what I mean? Poe some holes. Defeats the purpose of covering that area. No, no, no, minute.

Breathing holes. I'm not talking gaping holes, Carl. I'm talking about... Excuse me, sir. He's talking about gaping holes. Are these bikini's good for a hydra slide? I'm kind of feel like that'd be good for a hydrasline. No, it's so thick.

Neap prince super grippy on a hydrasline. Yeah, okay. No, and they were just, they were low-wasted, but it was in the era of when we were deciding high-wasted was for a woman. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was not it. And I do not want to say it come back. And hearing people say online that these are back, I'm like,

mm-mm, not in my world or general vicinity. Yeah. Do you know what I'm like vibing right now is a nice, sensible, black, long torso friendly one piece. Yeah. Well, do you know what the girlies are doing? The tankeenie is back. I heard that.

And everyone's wearing the tankeenie to the bars? What's a tankeenie? Like a singlet top is the top and then the bottoms is your undies? And then people are wearing it to bars because basically it's just a nice fitting top and if someone spills a drink on you or you get sweaty.

It's just togs. Mate. Okay, I can see, I can see tanquinis. Poo! Poo! Who! Who! Unbelievable!

Unbelievable. The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleshfallen and Haley If you are a parent And maybe your kids are going to grow up It's stopped paying for their shit According to psychologists Well don't say that if someone's listening

And their parents are paying for things Oh yeah sorry Also rich coming from you Rich coming from you who From you who Rich coming from me Now why don't you who Tell everyone

Listen my father my daddy don't pay for my phone long after I started making more money than him, you know? Yeah, really? Yeah, and they paid for my insurance. It was all sort of just like swept up in teenagehood and then we just never turned it off.

And now I'm, you know, now they live with me and I'm looking after them. And so they're clawing back there in investment. Yeah, and I'm going to stick them out of my garage. Cold, unlined, just a bed out there. No, but psychologists were saying that it, you know, It's not great for their development. It doesn't teach them good life skills.

They've got to get out there and kind of, obviously, if they're really struggling and you've got the coin, whatever. You'd help them. But you hear... I do like it when you see a really rich celebrity and they're like, nah, my kids aren't getting a handout. Get a job. Despite the fact they live in a mansion and probably welfare.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'll hook them up with my connections. Yeah, and they've had a massive foot up in life. So they can get it. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, they're not just going to start filtering millions of dollars. 100%. Like Kim Kardashian.

whose kids have like Birkins. Yeah. You know? It's insane. You sort of, I was going to say, you sort of hate to think how they're going to grow up, but it's starting and it's a lot.

Okay, here's a question. Is there anybody listening right now? Are you listening and your parents still pay for something? Yeah. And maybe it's something small, like maybe they're paying for your Netflix or they're paying for, or they just send you a little,

little grocery. Oh, you still get an allowance? Yeah, maybe they're paying for your car insurance. But do you know what? If I was an adult and my parents, you could afford and they were giving me an allowance. I'd take it. I'd do, do, do, do.

I think if they weren't being put out by it. I'm saying, I'm doing the moral high ground because my parents currently don't pay for anything of mine. But one handy, if my parents were loaded, I'd be like, what do you mean? Get up at 4 am and go to radio. It's crazy, Dan. You're a tech billionaire.

I'm going to be fun employed. I'm going to be, I'll do social media. You've been influenced. You know what I've got some way to fill my day, but like, I'm not on that. Let's take some. calls. 0,800 dials at him, text us into the studio, 9696. Listen, it's judgment free. What are your parents

still paying for? I know people have been like, shut up. Because we are taking your calls now are the things that your parents are still paying for and there's no shortage. And do you know what? Like, I wouldn't say no. Get it.

Because Rebecca, what are your parents still paying for? My car insurance? Is that just because you got your first car and you were young and it's It's hard to get the cheap insurance, so they just put you on theirs, and it stayed there? Pretty much, but I've had two cars now, and I've also transferred the other car. So does you're right? Every time you're just like, Mom, Dad, and they just put it on.

Pretty much. Oh, that's nice. I mean, again, I wouldn't be complaining. No, neither, no. Does it make it cheaper when it's on theirs, or they're paying? I guess it's cheap for you because you're not paying. Yeah, I mean, they keep asking me to change it, but it has a lot. really happened. Oh, they've asked you to change it, right?

You just sort of just like not get around to it. Yeah, I'll get around to it. Promise I will. The day's a number, I'd say it, Rebecca. It is, Rebecca, thank you. Melanie, what do your parents still paying for? So my parents are still, well, my mum's still giving me $20 pocket money a month. Oh, cute. What do you spend it on? Well, it used to save me when I was a young student. It was a great $20. These days, it kind of may go on a cheeky pokey is or a jug.

Oh! A cheeky pokey pokey is on a jug. Have you ever turned mum's cheeky $20 on the pokies into some big cash? One time, I think I got up to about $80, but that's the amount. Have you thought about talking to mum about keeping up with inflation with this $20 payment? Yeah. It's been about 20 years that we've been getting these $20. Is it just an AP?

It just comes out automatically. Automatically, once a month. It's actually so cute. It's really cute. A little bonus thing. It's been great. Yeah, just a treat. It's a weekly treat.

I love that, or monthly. Melanie, thank you. Tasman, what do you still get from the parents? My mom still pays me a salary, even though I don't no longer work for the business. I'm sorry, what? We keep these things with us. Oh, my God, can we ask how much the salary is?

It works out to, I think, about $1,300 a month. Oh, my God. That won't hurt. That's amazing. And did they forget to take you off the books or? No, so after we emigrated, she kind of was like, oh, I'll keep paying you and then you can use that money to buy like birthday presents and Christmas presents for the family. And we've kind of just left it at that, but it doesn't always go towards all of that.

No. Wait what? That's a lot of money for Christmas and birthday presents. Yeah, that's like a 50, 60s, 60s. thousand dollars salary. That's insane. Oh, mate. Well, well, long may it last. Oh, Tendswin, that's great. Thank you. Some messages in.

My mum pays for half of our son's daycare bills a week. We didn't know until we were like $800 in credit at the daycare. She was doing a little half thing. Yeah. Have you had any men message or is a strongly gender-based bias? Oh, I don't know. I don't know. I'd definitely say there'd be men that...

Yeah, maybe. Can you guys actually shut up my mum's really listening and we'll Sorry On the fact she's still paying Yeah My parents pay for all my car Related costs subsidised my rent significantly

And help with kids' extracurricular activities They're also paying for a family holiday this year If they can afford it, good on them Why not help out your kids? 37 year old single mum to three And literally try my hardest to make it work without them But couldn't survive without the support at the moment With everything costing so much

Yeah That's probably, that's just how they want to spend their money If you're a single mom of three, they'll take great joy in helping you. I'm a 31-year-old full-time working physiotherapist and my parents still pay for my health insurance. You're working health. Nice. I also just purchased my first time that paid for new carpets going in for the inside to be repainted. I know I'm a very, very lucky girl.

Also, just while you hear, I've got this shoulder thing. Yeah, I've got a little more. Just a little way down. Just a little, like, just a quick massage. If you could, like, bend me over your knee. I don't know I'm not going to do the stretches. Yeah. I'm not doing the stretches.

Yes, I will say I'm going to do the stretches, but I don't have the time to do this six times a day? Nobody does physio stretch. And then they're so boring, like small and a hold against a door frame and twist. I'm born. I live in Toonga home of the Toll Roads and my dad pays for all the tolls for his kids and grandkids. I'm 54. That's cute. Yeah.

Good morning. My parents pay for my health and life insurance. I think that's fair since they brought me into the world. I didn't ask to be born. That's such a teenage thing to say. I didn't ask to be here, mum. Wish I was never bought. My partner's parents pay for all my gas.

Wow. Okay. I would not be complaining. Everyone's like, oh my God, have you seen 91? It's so expensive. They're like, is it? Yeah, really feeling like that. I'm 37.

My parents cover my power insurance, house and car, and I get home kill when I need. Oh, again, I wouldn't be complaining. We're thinking of buying a cow. My daughter has an Uber budget on my account. See, I think I'll do that because I just want them to know that they can get home safely. All they're going to do, though, is use it to Uber to Boys' houses. That's that. Biggie Pippin?

What? Yeah. I'll have the address. I know exactly where to rock up with a baseball bat. Let me just check this with Haley. Haley, if you were 14 and there was Uber, would you have used it to Uber to Bois Houses? Yeah, because it's way safer.

Because we used to just like walk in the dark. Well, I don't want that either. Walk along the side of the road in the dark. Where am I going? No match will feel it out. You should do a segment next week called Whose parents pulled off paying for their stuff after they heard this segment.

Oh yeah, yeah, a little... Well, like the psychologist said, it's building... Character, what is it? Character and independence. Somebody I said, I woke up this morning, needed to be shitty at somebody. Now I'm going to be shit at my parents

because they don't give me anything. The Z&M Podcast Network. I don't know if these myths... We were fed as the only way to get rich if you were told this and whether or not you still believe that it's true. Because here's seven myths. The millennials thought would make them rich

that financial experts have kind of debunked. First one, uni is the only path to success. That was fed hard though. Hard in the 90s, hard. In the 2000s as well, if you weren't going to uni, it was like, it better be for a bloody good reason.

Yeah. And if not, what are you going to do? It's like, I was going to get a job. Just going to think about it for a bit. It's like, no, no, no, no. And now it's all the tradies that are laughing. Yeah, I mean, they trained, but they were like degrees open doors,

but also like you start life with this huge debt, no job guarantee. Things like apprenticeships, trades, entrepreneurs, courses are way better alternatives. $38,000 I spent. Saving money equals building wealth. So cash in a savings account that just barely beats inflation. It's not going to do it. You've got to be smart with it.

Wealth comes from investing and letting compounding do the heavy lifting. But ours was like transfer $100 a week. Yeah. And you see it and you'd be like actually with the rate of inflation, that's not working. No. The third myth about that millennials were taught that would make them rich, you've got to buy a house. Home ownership was like, it's for it, you've got to do it.

And now more people are just like, why? Why would I spend all that money? Because what you buy the house for, by the way, you end up paying way more. Yeah. It's called interest and it sucks. You can be it. But then, you know, you can be better off renting

and as long as you're putting that extra money into... Something else that's working for you. Look at me, financial advisor, Haley Sproul. Brad Olson or our banker Luke will be like, shut up. Don't let's do it. The fourth myth, credit cards are evil. The card is not the problem the spender is. Now, I'm doing well.

You, because you never had a credit card until recently. Never had a credit card until recently because I love to spend, I love to shop. You didn't trust yourself. You didn't trust myself. Because if they gave me a limit, be it 1,000, 2,000, whatever, I'll be like, and then I'll be like, paying it off, but I'll be like, don't know.

when that starts is when you get your first student overdraft for $500 and then you're forever in student overdraft into your adult life. Dude, I've still got mine. Yeah. It just sits here. It's like not in the red, but it just sits there. Yeah. 600, mine was. It was 500 and then once I think I needed a little bit more. I remember the day I was like, I just don't need this

and I closed it. Yeah, I closed it. I was like, I need to do that today. It was also way easy to get an overdraft as a student and this is a working person where you're like, can I just get it like an overdraft on that account? Just in case. Just like, as an automatic payment comes out on the day before payday. And they're like, oh, we need three months of bank statements.

Yeah, proof you're not a gambler, proof you're not. They're your statements. You looked them up. Yeah. Yeah, look, I've got that amount available. But it's a, I've got this little $600 thing there. It's crazy. And yet when you're a student, they'll easily give you $500, $600.

It's crazy. Yeah, that is the first one. Okay, other myths that millennial thought would make them rich. Pensions can wait till you're older. You've got to start early. Definitely, as someone who never paid anything into Kiwi Sabre until just recently. I was like, whoops. Finance is a man's world, that can e-f off.

And rich people just work harder. Not really true. That's a real, like, oh, mate thing, you've got to work hard, work to the day, your bloody gets 65. And then you're like, no, you just get hit by a bus. And lots of people work hard and it doesn't happen. Wealth is about being smart at the right time

and a lot of chance and luck and that kind of crap. Investing in stuff, where I was always, because my parents, when the share market crash happened in 1987, My parents were like young and like starting out. Yeah. And they knew people that lost like $10,000. Yeah. And then my dad were like, wah!

That's what made. Never invest. Never invest. And everyone got scared of investing. And it's like those same people that lost $10,000 are now driving like land rovers and range rovers and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Oh, wow. I mean, look, it's...

Look at that, Heidi Sproul financial advisor. Mm. Mm. I have been looking at, if you've been listening to the show at 6. 6 a.m., a taxi dermied stillborn lion. Yeah. And a full-sized Jerusalem donkey. Yeah, so in terms of financial a voice, take me with a big hearty grain of soul. The Benz Kast Network.

Bryn joins us from the newsroom. Oh, it feels like it's been forever. I know, we've missed you. Oh, likewise. Yeah. What have you been up to, Bryn? Oh, nothing, just saving money, that sort of thing. What are you saving for?

That's boring, but yeah. Get out there and spend it. You're going on another holiday because you just went to Japan and you? Yeah, I might do one of those medical trips, you know, where you go over, getting your face. Everything done. Oh, what's? Getting his tits down. You're going to get a beautiful boy like you.

Getting a sister. You would look great with a good set of. Nice hockey, just a C cup. You know, nothing too OTT. I mean, if you're getting it done, you might as well go D. We'll go D. And then they'll settle nicely. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah. He smells really good, too. He's wearing Tom Ford. Oh, official Tom Ford or one of those? Tobacco Vanille. No, it's a real one. Oh, lovely. I've got it from farmers.

Is it tobacco one? No, it's not the tobacco one. Which one is it? That might just be me. He smells like douries. You smells like douries. Okay, yeah, right. Which one are you wearing?

It's the extreme one. Oh, lovely. Extreme. Time for it extreme! Yeah. What do we like, Sol Blanc? Salad de Blanc or something. I just, whatever, I grab a dirty free and just hound all over myself.

We reek on that plate. Right, but what would you get done on your cosmetic holiday? I don't know. Maybe a bum job or something. Yeah. A bum job. I've got a good tush. I just had a little look.

I know that's probably an HR thing and I'll cop that on the tin if I hear it about it. I'm not complaining. Oh no, well, good, great tush. Fantastic. All right, well, Bryn comes in once a week with all the news stories that are not enough for the main news bulletin and we put it all in

not enough of the news news news. I think we're not going to say who wrote it. But I just want to say, I'm not a big fan of puns. Okay. Yeah. Well, you're in the wrong business. So I'm hoping there are no puns today. Right.

Who knows? We'll see. 96, 96, you can figure out who wrote this one. Yeah, who wrote this? 9696. Kilda, good morning. First up to Louisiana in the US, and a drink driver decided to leg it from police into a swamp.

Drinking gatorade wasn't what got him in trouble, but a gator was waiting all the same, and it took a bite out of crime and him. The criminal bit off more than he could chew and tried to say, See you later, alligator. was caught between a crock and a hard place. Vaughan.

Jesus. It's violently obvious. Now, as we said last time Vaughn wrote this, pull back. You know what I mean? There's like a filter. Too many puns. Wasn't it Coco Chanel that said,

you know, before you leave the house, take off one item? Before you submit it to Brin, just serve it away. I don't know who wrote it yet. The jury still. I'll tell you what, this story still isn't finished. Oh, shit.

So that's a clear giveaway. I love it Eventually he got snapped up by the cops who described him as armless The long jaw of the law got him in the end Still going Yes Frankly the whole thing sings of

Reptile dysfunction That's born clapping 96696 if you can figure out If it was Fletch for the Haley who wrote this week Okay Enough news to the news I'm going to write next weeks Yes This is abhorrent.

I love it. It's just clunky. Yeah. It's too many. Speaking of things that bite back, closer to home now. That was nice. That was nice. And this is no yoke. Okay, and here we are.

Pack and say Rangiora has had to recall a burger, literally called Death by Chicken, for being undercooked. So for once, the menu was being completely honest. Winner, winner, definitely not chicken dinner. I didn't mind that Is that the end of that bit? No, it's not. Okay, I was going to say, it felt short, punchy, there we go.

This one's a bit raw. The recalls ruffled a few feathers at MPI, and the burgers have come off the shelf to roost. The excellent news... It's still going. No one's actually been sick. The brand cooked its own goose, except it didn't. Turns out the name was poultry.

I don't want to say it. Start the sentence again. Start the sentence again. This one deserves it. Turns out the name was poultry in motion. That's the best year. Someone did text in saying, how did they pulay it off?

Poulet chicken? We should not be encouraging that kind of comedy. Poultry in motion. There's still one more story. Okay. Okay. And finally, a heavenly showdown in Madrid

because the Pope's got a hair-raising rival. It's Pope Leo XIV, which I think is 14, versus Bad Bunny. Oh, it just reveres our hair-raising rival. It's hard because the first pun required more information. It meant nothing until... For the people who listen to this segment multiple times, you pick up, hold on the stuff on the second message.

So if they go back on the podcast on I heart, though. You just bang that back 15 button four times. sit through it again and you'll be like, God damn. How all live comedy works. Call back to a something that hasn't happened yet. Punch lines and then we'll get to the jokes. What I'll do is I'll just restart this story. Yeah, that's actually great.

So I don't need to do that minus 15. I'll take back 15. Because I've already forgotten what the story was about. Same. Okay. And finally, a heavenly showdown in Madrid because the Pope's got a hair-raising rival. It's Pope Leo the 14th. versus bad bunny, and it's a real air-resistible match-up.

Sunday service versus Saturday set list. That was okay. It's not bad. I still don't know. I have no idea what the story is, and we're three paragraphs in. It's the PoteMobile versus the tour bus. That doesn't get a clap. That's just worse.

That's not even a job or a pun or anything. That's just words. It's the pulpit versus the mosh pit. Oh, I like that. Yeah, that's it. Finally, the first joke. The Pope. Well, why do you start with that?

Yeah. And finally, it's the pulpit versus a mosh. The list continues, might I just add. Oh, okay. But what's the story? I have no idea. That doesn't matter, Haley. The story doesn't matter at this point.

What jokes? There's no jokes. The Pope versus the puppy. Did I say that right? Barpi. Papi. Papi. The Pope versus the papi.

It's the battle of the holy box off. Lettuce pray versus let us play. Because he's a bunny. What is the story? Well, you're not listening. They've got a gig on at the same time. There's no point has this said that they have a gig on at the same time. Not once.

Am I wrong friend? Has it once referred to the fact that bad bunny and the boat have conflicting schedules? Not once. Well, you just wait, Haley. off-bait way, because the faithful are hopping out and the festival crowd are coming out at it.

Born, why do you make things so over complex? He's banned. He's banned for writing. The story isn't finished yet either. The story hasn't started, bro. Someone said I'm not very impressed with these jokes. That's a joke. That's a good one. Again, I'm just reading.

I've not added anything to this. When asked about his rival, the Pope said, bad bunny. Back in my day we called him a wascally rabbit. He's banned. He's banned. You've got a month banned. Month ban. This too, again, not once. Has the story been mentioned? You will not be allowed to write, not enough for the news news, until we're back from holiday.

Have you made that up? Just 9-6-96. Yeah, what are they saying? Yes or no? They're not impressed. I'm cringing. That's not a pun? I'm hopping mad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right.

Should we turn it off? Let's turn it off. Yeah, that's great. So, you didn't, this story wasn't in there. It was just sort of bad bunny and Pope's. There was no story, yeah. No, the bad buddy and the Pope have got a concert and a guest spot on at the same time. Well, there, it is best than that.

It's not in there. Did you not learn the five w-doues and who, what, where, when, Warren? Why? What? Man. He's banned. Yep. That was crap.

Ban in effect until mid-July. Thank you very much, Prin. Hey, remember how you just gave that Uber driver five stars because you wanted five stars back? Yes. Let's do that with this podcast. Oh, yeah. Review it five stars.

Tell your friends and we'll do the same for you if you ever need a review for anything. But where are you giving me my five stars? Well, I don't know. Do you own a restaurant or something? Yes. If you give us five stars on this podcast, Tell us where you would like your review and we'll review.

Even where we won't even go. We'll just review your thing. I don't want people to know where my restaurant is. I'm doing one of those secret restaurants. Oh, I was going to say that's exactly the opposite of how restaurants work. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.