ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 11th November 2024

Episode Date: November 10, 2024

Google search results Top 6 Ways to Foil your Ankle Monitor Hayley's Christchurch discovery Goon Sacks are Back in Fashion Couple Asks Guests to Vote on Their Last Name Air Tag Sharing with Airlines Silly Little Poll - Are You Shopping for Singles Day Today? Grammy Nominations Have Been Announced! Vaughan and August 'Lord of the Rings' Journey What was your Typo? New Competition Announcement Check-In Chicken Fact Of the Day What was your Recent Impulse Decision?  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fleshpawn and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Good morning, welcome to the show, Fleshpawn and Hayley. Hayley joining us from our Christchurch studio this morning. Kia ora, kia ora ana, and talofa lava, and bonjour guys from Christchurch. Wow.

A multicultural city and a multicultural welcome. Welcome. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. No, I'm coming home today, but I've been doing the Seven Days Live Tour. I've been this weekend since I last saw you. I've been in Wellington, Napier, and Christchurch.

She's getting around. Getting around. You know me. I always have. But, you know, I'm on my own here. But very soon I want to tell you about a discovery I've made in this studio. Okay. Yeah, I'm actually feeling pretty powerful.

And did you see I'm at the big desk? I'm at the equivalent of your desk, Fletch. You're sitting where I sit normally. Okay, well, don't let the power go to your head. Oh, it already has. I'm sorry. The top six coming up as well. Yes, a gang member foiled his home detention bracelet.

Foiled it? This is part of a larger story about a naughty criminal. Okay. That apparently had been foiling his ankle bracelet so he could go out and it just made it look like it was glitching. Oh, right. Now, I assume this is called foiling because the old school way of blocking a signal was to wrap things in tinfoil.

Does that work? Like how you stop the aliens from reading your thoughts. I did that actually during COVID. It worked. Because of the 5G and the COVID. So that's why I... This Mitchell and Ness hat looks like it's Charlotte Hornets underneath thick tinfoil. Yeah, I know.

Thick tinfoil. So I've got this top six other ways to foil your home detention bracelet. I assume. I don't know. I've never had one. Next on the show though. The exciting discovery I have made in my Christchurch studio. Play ZM's Flashborn and Hayley. Okay, as you mentioned, I

am in the Church of Christ. Christchurch. Because I've been down here, I've been on tour with 7 Days Live and so I'm in our studio in Christchurch and I'm never in charge and I'm very seldom alone without

you guys because you know I don't really know how to radio I mean you don't know how to push the buttons but that's okay but just before I slid a thing yeah you changed the setting. I was very impressed. Thank you very much.

The bar's low. It literally couldn't be easier, but. Okay, well, I figured it out. And then, do you know what's great about this studio? I'm all on my own. One, I have temperature control. Oh, yeah, that's lush. And as you know, I am often hot.

Yeah, you love a cooler studio. Oh as you know, I am often hot. Yeah, you love a cooler studio. Oh, my God, I'm always hot. So I've got it on 17 currently, and I put a hoodie on. Like I like, I sort of feel good. And then I saw it in this studio, guys. There's a little TV. Now, we don't have one of those in our studio. Our TVs always have, like, little backgrounds on them.

Like behind you right now, Fletch, I see Sabrina Carpenter. Yeah. And I see Carpenter. Yeah. And I see Benson Boone. Yeah. So I picked up this TV and I've signed into Netflix. So... Oh my God.

This is why we don't... You signed in with your Netflix or someone was already just... My Netflix. I signed in. It's one of those TVs that's got a Netflix button. I was like,

I wonder if that works in here. You can't be on air watching Netflix at the same time. Because I'm just in the studio on my own. on air watching Netflix at the same time. Because I'm just in the studio on my own. I actually have autonomy over my own day and I've just realised

that there's a TV in the studio with Netflix so I'm going to watch a movie. Is this what producer Caitlin, former producer Caitlin does when she does a weekend show

from Christchurch? Yeah, yeah. So she's just watching Netflix the whole time. I know. So we're in Auckland every day working so hard

on the radio fully concentrated whereas the Christchurch team are just standing watching Netflix. What should I watch? I could watch What's on Netflix

is top 10 at present. Oh scroll down hang on. Top 10 movies Super Mario Bros is number one. That was an enjoyable film. Did you end up

watching that? It was actually. It was pretty enjoyable. I don't want to watch that. Bullet Train second. There's a Christmas film. Is Bullet Train the Brad Pitt? Yeah. I haven't seen that yet. That's good. Yeah, I've heard that's good. Yeah, that's good. I like that too. Yeah. Okay.

No, these don't all look like my cup of tea. I sort of want, oh my god, today's top picks. Friends. I'm just going to watch Friends. I'm going to watch Friends the whole time. Hang on. Okay, so we've lost you for the rest of the show then. No, physically I'm here. I just want to let you know I'm in a studio on my own and I'm playing season one, episode one

of Friends. What a day to be alive. Is that where Rachel comes in in the wedding dress? Or is that established later? No, I'm pretty sure that's episode one. I'll tell you, mate. I'm going to be able to put it on. Don't encourage this. This is why we don't have a TV in the studio because Vaughn gets easily one. I'll tell you, mate. I'm about to put it on. Don't encourage this. This is why we don't have a TV in the studio,

because Vaughan gets easily distracted. I've got a little TV literally in my pocket. I've got a little TV in my laptop. I've got TVs around. If I wanted to be distracted, I will certainly find a way to be distracted. Next on the show, something's back in fash. All I'm saying is grab the big rotating washing line.

Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Hayley. The following conversation, of course, will be in moderation. Absolutely. Oh, of course. One conversation per hour. Yep. And with a glass of water in between.

And a glass of water in between. But when I was growing up, I was of the understanding that wine always came in a box. What else did it come in? Is that because Christine had a box just tucked away in the pantry? It was a box. Right.

No, it was the exact same stuff that's still around that people only ever use for cooking now. The country house white medium or the red, we weren't a red family. Right. And even then, I think they got this, they got the sweeter version. Right. For cooking?

No, for drinking. Oh, for drinking. For drinking. In moderation. In moderation, of course. Obviously, yeah. And I can remember as a kid, it'd be like,

we're finished. And you'd be like, running and thinking. And blow up the goo. Blow it up and you had a pillow. Slow up the goo and you had a pillow. Or you'd kick it around the backyard. Until the knob,

until the nozzle hit a toe or a foot That really hurt And then years later you'd go to a flat when you were a teenager and they'd be all glued to the ceiling Did you have that? No. What?

What kind of feral flat was that? The feralest. When I was a teenager and I started being a goth there was a really famous goth flat in Wellington and you'd go there. A famous goth flat? Yeah, it was on Eva Street in Wellington. All the goths will know it. And the

whole ceiling was covered in goon sacks. And that was like it's little gross. So then they'd put glue on the goon sack and then just go to the roof. Yeah, and just stick it to the ceiling. Like a big foil ceiling. Well, apparently now in 2024, the goon is back. Return of the goon sack and then just go to the roof. Yeah, and just stick it to the ceiling so it's like a big foil ceiling. Well, apparently now in 2024, the goon is back.

Return of the goon. Return of the goon. Now, I would love to see some actual sales stats or figures in New Zealand. Waitrose. Oh, yeah, in New Zealand. This is a UK story.

Right, okay. But I've seen them in the supermarket near where you'd find your old school country medium white dry. Yeah. There are some brands including like Squealing Pig, for example, who are doing

like fancy goons. Really? Yeah, yeah, I've seen them. I've seen them. Well, yeah, apparently they're back. Yeah, well, 18% increase in boxed wine sales last year. And this is in the UK. Yeah, and that's on the back of 11% rise last year and 9% the year before.

So it is an increasing trend. There's also a correlation there with the cost of living crisis. Totally. Because is boxed wine cheaper or the bougie stuff isn't? Yeah, I don't know if the bougie stuff that I've seen in New Zealand works out to actually be that much cheaper. But the box wine definitely is.

So this is an example. They say there's a box wine and on the front of it, it says this box contains three bottles. Yeah. The equivalent of three bottles of wine. In moderation, you should not be drinking that at once.

Oh no, that would last at least a month. So each wine has, let's say, four generous pours. Yep. So one of those and then that's four times three. That's 12. Generous pours. 12 very generous pours. Jeez, actually, there's got to be more than that.

So they're saying that it is very much letting you know that this is a budget conscious decision. Yeah. Because your one box is three bottles. Well, because I definitely, and I want to say at some point in my life when I was younger, sometimes I would drink not in moderation.

And I just want to say, I want to admit that, you know, I'm human. Yeah. And that was kind of the whole point of Goons was bang for buck. How much can I get in this thing? Yeah.

But now I wouldn't even dream of it. Also, hanging it on one of those big rotating washing lines and then spinning the hell out of it. And whoever it stopped pointing at or closest to had to take a big hoon from the goon. Yeah, that's goon of fortune. Yeah, that's goon of fortune. Yeah, but again, certainly not encouraging playing that drink in moderation.

Oh, God, no. Grow up, for God's sake. Well, no, you can spin. You can have your fun. You can spin the washing line, and then when it gets there, of course, you pour yourself one glass, and then you're out because of moderation. Yeah. You're only allowed to play one round.

You're only allowed to play one round. It's more like, at this stage, goon roulette. Yes. Like Russian roulette, except not. But anyway, apparently it's back, and it must have item to take to any soiree. Really? And how good was the box you could punch the two holes in the top and pinch your fingers through it?

Oh my, yes! Great way to carry it, one in each hand. Because of course you're supplying the whole party because everybody is of course going to have one to two drinks, maximum with a glass of water in between. I think it's a party of 30 people and one goon will service the whole party. Moderation.

Certainly moderation. The top six is next. Play. ZM. Fletchvorn and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the top six.

Good morning. I've just Googled foiling your ankle monitor. And I have found a few stories From New Zealand's past Including the 31st of October 2020 Corrections officials suspect Dozens of prisoners are wrapping Their electronic monitoring bracelets In tinfoil to block tracking

Does that seriously work? Like would that work on your phone Or watch? Would that stop the GPS? I don't know A little bit tinfoil We could try it After

And then in 2023 Criminals wrapping tinfoil around ankle bracelets To avoid Alerts And this just happened, a guy was sentenced Just last week And he wanted a little discount A discount on time to serve due to home detention.

Home detention, but then the judge was like, well you've actually been foiling your monitor because there's been a whole... What do you mean discount? Oh, so they're like you're off to prison for this long, buddy. And he's like but I was doing home detention, can I have a discount? It's not a bloody Hong Kong market. It's not a bartering system,

is it? No, I know, but you don't ask, don't get. Yeah. Well, that's the thing, if you don't ask, you, I know. You don't ask, don't get. Yeah. Yeah, well, that's the thing. If you don't ask, you don't know. Yeah. Yeah. The squeaky wheel gets the less time in prison.

I don't know. That's right. Well, I've got the top six ways to foil your ankle bracelet, which is probably pointed at this stage, of course. Just joking. Well, it's satire, isn't it? Yeah. It's satire, and that's actually going to be under protection of the Greens.

So watch it. Number six on the list of the top six ways to foil your ankle bracelet. Wrap it with old, malleable roofing lead. Oh, yeah, that would work. Remember, your dad was a builder. You must have had some lead scraps around. Yep, because you'd take it to the scrap dealers. Take it to the scrappies. Yep.

But it was so much fun to play with. And people would often get up on church roofs and old buildings and steal it. Copper was, copper's the, if you're up on a roof and you're risking your neck, you might as well grab the copper. Or get copper. The copper, put the copper down, spouts and such. But yeah, the roofing lead was like malleable. It was so much fun to play with and you could melt it.

But looking back on it, I don't think that was good for me. No, probably not actually. No. Right. My granny would always have some. It was good for you. No, probably not actually. No. Right. My gran would always have some. It was good for you. But that would stomp. I wouldn't short it.

Isn't that what, they'd have like lead vests for x-ray techs and stuff back in the day? Yep. No, they leave the room now. Oh, they leave the room now. When my kids have had x-rays,

they're like, Dad, you better chuck this on. I'm like, Christ, the long-term bitch just standing in here with this thing just blasting people with radiation.

Number five on the list of the top six ways to foil your ankle bracelet. Wrap it in an empty goon from the roof of a Wellington goth flat. A very well-known, maybe just being in the room of the very well-known Wellington goth flat. I think TPS can get through a goon. It's just plastic. Don't think you've thought that one through.

Or are you thinking a tin? Like, is it tinfoil, some of the goons? Aren't they plastic? Well, it's foil-esque, isn't it? I thought it was foil-adjacent. Yeah. Foil-adjacent, yeah, that's right. Foil-adjacent was also the name of my goth band.

Yeah, yeah. A great name for it. Yeah. And your first single was Tooth Stinger. That's right, that's right. Because of the... When you chew on foil, of course, you get stingy teeth. Number four on the list of the top six ways to foil your ankle bracelet, Play-Doh.

I don't get it. Just with enough of it. You just need enough of it. You need a lot of Play-Doh. Where are you going to go? Are you going to go out on the town? Yeah, with your Play-Doh leg. Just have a big Play-Doh leg.

Yeah. It's Play-Doh. I was just thinking I'm going to add an additional one in here. Full leg cast. Oh, yeah. Break your leg. Make it look like you've got a broken leg. Oh, I was just thinking I'm going to add an additional one in here. Full leg cast. Oh, yeah. Break your leg. So make it look like you've got a broken leg. Yeah, good stuff.

Yeah, but you're right. And then they come around. What would happen if you had an ankle bracelet and you had to get a full cast? They'd put it over the cast, wouldn't they? No, because it's got to monitor your heart to know that you're wearing it still. Really? I'm sure when you take it. No, but you can't. Can you monitor the heart on the ankle? Yeah, you can monitor the heart anywhere know that you're wearing it still. Really? I'm sure when you tie it. No, but you can't.

Can you monitor the heart on the ankle? Yeah, you can monitor the heart anyway. Can you? Do you have a pulse in your ankle? What about on your on your PP? Oh yeah, but the problem is when are you putting it tight? Flaccid or erect? And then if you put it on

around the member. It is too much. Moving on. Number three on the list of the top six ways to foil your ankle bracelet. Full metal pants. Okay.

So instead of full metal jacket, it's the sequel full metal pants. Corrugated iron. It's the equivalent of corduroy pants if you make it the matter corrugated iron. Kind of a chastity belt as well.

Yeah, true. True. And the risk of, what's that one where you, you know you have to get injections for it? Tetanus. Tetanus, yeah. I just got my tetanus one the other day. Does that still hurt?

It's a sore arm, yeah. Like three days later, it's still tender. Why did you get tetanus? It's like mixed with other stuff. Rabies? Nah, it's not mixed. Why did you get tetanus? It's like mixed with other stuff. Rabies? Did you get your rabies updated? You don't need that updated. I've got all three.

You've got rabies for good. Yeah, I've got rabies for life. Rabies for life. Mean. Which was the second single off Hayley's golf album. Rabies for life. Rabies for life. Number two on the list of the toxic ways to foil your ankle bracelet,

fishbowl full of water. Okay, and then just put your leg in it. Put your leg in the water. Again, not that convenient if you want to be sort of leaving the house, which is the whole point that you're foiling it. But you've got to, deep down, you've got to remember you are a criminal. Life's not supposed to be super easy for you. No, it's actually fair.

You made somebody else's life difficult by being a criminal. And number one on the list of the top six ways to foil your ankle bracelet. Okay, so you're going to need a fair bit of lube for this one. Okay. And you're going to go foot to foot with Nana. Okay. Okay. So you put your foot that your ankle monitors on like that.

And then you get Nana's foot into a sort of a 69 position with your foot. So toe to heel, heel to toe. And then lube, lube, lube, lube, lube and then slip it on Nan. Slip it straight off your leg straight onto Nan's. Good.

And then she's just going to be chilling at home anyway. But she doesn't go out. She doesn't. No, she's not going out. Yeah, she's not going out. She's not going out. The chase is on

and then it's bedtime. Yeah. So they're going to be like, what a good boy. I don't know where that was going. Why have I got lube with my Nana on her feet? Yeah, and then you, because the foot will only work if they're like department of

corrections are going to think you're the most ideal model home detention citizen yeah yeah dude just staying at home yeah watching caro yeah perfect plan they'll go tap into your monitor ankle monitor and use this the microphone function and here you're watching Kyra. Brilliant. Perfect. That is today's top six. So there's an American couple. They're getting married

in February next year and their names are Danielle and Jacob. Okay. And they're quite, I'd say they're non-trad. I'd say they're absolutely covered in tattoos. Okay.

They're a cool, funky looking couple and the dilemma that they're having is that they don't want to, neither of them wants to change their name. Their last name. Their last name. Okay. But they have kids,

and they want to have the same last name, which is the same reason my mum took Sproul, because she was like, it's weird if you guys are all Sprouls and I'm not. That was the only reason she did it. Yeah. But what about a hyphen? Okay, so people suggested

you should hyphenate the name, right? And then you both get that. Now, for me and Aaron, if we did that, it'd be like Courtesy Sproul. Okay, so people suggested you should hyphenate the name, right? And then you both get that. Now, for me and Aaron, if we did that, it would be like Courtesy Sproul. Kind of works. Or Sproul Courtesy or whatever. You guys would be like Smith Fletcher. That's quite cool.

And is it in South America where most people have their first name of their dad and then their mum's last name? You know, like they have a double barrel? Everyone does it? Oh, really? I don you know, like they have a double barrel? Everyone does it? Oh, really? I don't know. But then when does that stop? Because, say, in my situation, I'll be a Smith-Holmes. Yeah.

And Sade would be a Ho-Reed. Oh, yeah. So are my kids going to be Indiana Smith-Holmes Ho-Reed? I don't know. Like, I don't know when it changes. Yeah, you just can't keep hyphenating. It's too much. It gets too much, yeah.

Oh, God, imagine in 100 years' time. So the reason that hyphenating doesn't feel good for them is that she is Bonadonna and he is Bartlebow. So if they were to hyphenate, they would be the Bonadonna Bartlebows. Okay, wait, say again. She's Bonadonna. So her name is Bonadonna. No, her name is Danielle Bonadonna.

Yeah, yeah. And his name is Jacob Bartlebow. So if they were to hyphenate, it would be Bonadonna Bartlebow. And they were like, it's too soon. I absolutely love it. I actually love it. It's one of the best names were like, it's too silly. I love it. I absolutely love it. I actually love it. It's one of the best names I've ever heard in my life. I love it so much.

Hayley Jane Bonadonna Bartlebow. Like, how fun is that? But they thought it was too silly. People wouldn't take them seriously. I just think it's genius, Bonadonna Bartlebow. So what they're doing at their wedding in February is they're getting their wedding guests to vote. Like, cast like a ballot.

Oh, my God. Are you allowed to write in? Like, are there write-in suggestions? Like, from us? No, no, no. Or the members of the public? The members that are going, the people that are going to their wedding. Is there like a vote, vote?

Like, is it this name? Is it that name? Or please write in a better suggestion. I thought it was just going to be option A or option B. But, yeah, you could submit for consideration. Just a whole new name or maybe a mingling of the two names. So they're just going to ask guests to pick either surname, not whether a hyphenating also would work.

That's my understanding of it, is it's just like, do we take hers or his, and then they won't know until obviously like the moment, and then they'll have to like commit to it basically. But wouldn't one sign, wouldn't it just be evenly split because each of the families would want their name?

No, but people don't invite women for 50-50 now. So it's not just families. So they're just getting, I think that's quite a cool way to do it. Though someone might end up a little bit shirty about it. So I know someone that changed, just got rid of both of them and got a new name.

Got a new name. What, they chose a fresh one? Yeah. That's weird. Yeah, fresh name. People that do the family, what do they call people that do the family treats? They're not going to like that. They're like, where the hell did that come from?

The genealogist. Yeah, just picked it out of thin air. Yeah. If I get married, can I choose Bonadonna Battlebell? Yeah. Absolutely. I love that last name. You're right. So I Googled, and I choose Bonadonna Battlebell? Yeah. I love that last name. You're right. So I Googled, and I've got to answer your question.

So it's in Spain and Spanish-American countries except Argentina. Each person has two surnames. Traditionally, the first surname is parental and comes from the father, while the second surname is maternal, comes from the mother. But then what are your kids? Yeah. Well, your kids? Yeah. Well, your kids would be born first name, surname, surname of the dad and mum.

But I've got two surnames. Yeah, dad and mum now have two surnames. But you wouldn't have two surnames because they've done this. Yeah, keep taking Smith. They keep taking Smith, but they've got two. That's confusing. Yeah, right. They keep taking Smith. They keep taking Smith, but they've got two. That's confusing. Yeah, it is confusing. I'll forgive them, though, because you have named some hot countries.

All of South America apart from Argentina. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't care what they're called. Sorry, Bolivia, that's ridiculous. I will not sleep with any of you. Play ZM's Flesh One and Hayley. If you've got Apple AirTags and you use these for your luggage, which I do, they're in all my

bags. I've got a wallet one as well. Like... He's connected. He ain't losing a thing. I've got a key one. You've got a key one. A wallet one. A car one. I've got no ones and I should definitely have ones. You keep saying I've got to get some and then you're going to lose something one day and then you're going to regret it. I literally lose everything every time

I exist and breathe. Well, do you remember that time we went to the wedding at the start of the year and we landed and I was like, my bag was still in Auckland and I was like, oh, I guess I'm not getting that now. That's going to stay there for a while, is it? That air tag was literally showing it in Auckland, so I just went to the desk and they were like, oh, it's on the next

flight. I was like, perfect. But can't, isn't it? What, you didn't scream at the person who had nothing to do with it? I like to find someone to scream at. Generally, I like to scream at someone who's got absolutely nothing to do with it. It's not their fault. I mean, it sucked, but they just dropped it off at the hotel.

But they would hate people like you being like, my Apple AirTag has shown me where my bag is. I know, and that's the thing. It's almost at that stage, it's useless. Like, you know it's there somewhere at the airport, and this is what this new update is. I know, and that's the thing. It's almost, at that stage, it's useless. Like, you know it's there somewhere at the airport, and this is what this new update is going to fix, and that's why people are quite excited because Apple are going to let you, with the new update,

share your iTag location with either the airline or other people. Excuse me? Yeah, so if you file, like, lost luggage, you can be like, here's the link. It'll be, like, live for live for like a week or something. And then they could, I'm guessing, go around and beep it. Or like find like the kind of location where it is. Oh, yeah.

Wherever they store the bags. Yeah. Because up till then, you'd be like, it's a black suitcase. There's an air tag in it. Yeah. You know, in a... Cool story, bro. Yeah, in a room of, you know, like a thousand lost bags.

It's got a Spider-Man baggage tag, if that helps. Do you have a Spider-Man one? I've got a ribbon to make it stand out. Yeah. Because no one else thought of that. Everybody else does a ribbon. No, I've put a ribbon on my handle to make it stand out. Right.

So I can spot it. Do you know, I will say that my little mini fridge, as people call my suitcase, has been getting a lot of attention on tour. Has it? You know, I've got the big trunk. Yes. And everyone keeps saying, what's in that bloody fridge? And they love it.

Well, it does. It looks like a smeg fridge. It is. It looks like a small smeg fridge. But you don't need a ribbon on that, do you? But no air tag on it. And that's the thing. You've got a sexy suitcase. Someone could steal that. That's why you on that but no air tag on it and that's the thing, you've got a sexy suitcase

someone could steal that that's why you need to put an air tag in there well the update's coming with 18.2 if you're an air tagger and your luggage would 100% recommend it every time we talk about it I always say I'm going to get some

so it's a temporary share because you can do it for like a week I was going to say you can So it's a temporary share because you can do you can share it for like a week. Ah yeah because I was going to say you can share an AirTag with someone already. Yeah but this is like letting you share

with like the airline and other people that aren't like your friends. But then it's kind of weird what if you share it with someone at the airline. They find your baggage

they give it to you but then for the next week they can see where you're at. No because there's an option for you to say disable it and I've found it.

I'm reunited with my luggage kind of thing. Yeah. You no longer need to see exactly where I am with my luggage. It's none of your business where I am with my luggage, to be honest. I just have to worry about these things because I'm hot. Yeah, me too. Yeah. A flesh-worn minger over here wouldn't understand, but when you're hot...

There's no idea. People do like to know where you're at. Yeah, okay. Yeah. Okay. They get a little bit silly. I know I've never been stalked. That's how do you know what Hottie fail

and I'm talking to you Vaughn not you Fletch. I mean obviously go on. Obviously. That's how it crossed a bear isn't it? It is.

It really is. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley silly little foe silly little foe it is so silly silly silly that the silly little foe Do you plan on doing some shopping for Singles Day? Today is Singles Day. Yeah, so it's a big thing in China.

Yeah, that's right. Didn't the guy who started AliExpress start it? And then he's like, hey, single people, because today's 1-1-1-1. It's all the singles. You're by yourself, which is one person. How's this for a loose

reason to have a sale? And then it kind of caught on. Is he the guy that became China's richest person and then disappeared? They disappeared him? You'd disappear if you were the richest person as well. No, like I mean the government disappeared him. Oh dear.

He's a bit lippy. You're getting a bit lippy. You're getting a bit lippy. What was his name? Jack someone? Jack Marl? Jack Marl. Yeah, Jack Marl.

Yeah. Is the Alibaba CEO still missing? Source told CNBC in early 2021 he was just lying low. Lying low. So is this singles day sales thing, is that even a big thing? Because we've kind of hooked on to the Black Friday sales. Well, it's a huge thing in China, and yet it's just kind of becoming a thing now around the world.

Like Black Friday wasn't really a thing here, and now it is with online shopping. Just buying stuff we don't really need. But you know what? Singles Day now and Black Friday, I mean, you do have to be careful because we've pointed out in previous years and consumer groups do this as well,

that places will jack their prices before Black Friday. Just to say, hey, we're having a 40% off, but they put 20% on last week. Yeah. You've got to be careful. Do you plan on doing some shopping for Singles Day? Our options were yes, no, and unsure what that is. 50% of people still haven't heard of Singles Day. Yeah.

Which is great. 33% of people said no. The smallest amount was yes, love a sale at 17%. I do love a sale. I will very very rarely buy anything full price. You give me a sale, I'm frothing. Or you'll just hunt out a

special. What are you excited to buy? Vaughan? We know the boy loves to shop. You think my shopping's bad. Man Vaughan, he loves to shop. Tractor parts. No. You could get a single stay... Tractor.

Forklift. I tell you what. Single stay forklift. If there's a neat little single stay forklift, maybe I can't say no to a bargain. Timu must have a forklift. Surely Timu's got a $500 forklift. I don't know if I want to be lifting my stuff with a Timu forklift.

I'm going to go look on Timu to see if he's got a forklift. Okay. Yeah. I can guarantee they do. How much is postage? Like 25 bucks? Yeah, hopefully. Three postage if you see if it's got a forklift. Okay. Yeah. I can guarantee they do. How much is postage? Like 25 bucks? Yeah, hopefully. Three postage if you spend over a certain amount.

Forklift. Good luck getting that forklift here, Teemu. Currently don't have a bed, says Dan, and I'm sleeping on a camping mattress. Oh, yuck. Oh, no. And they always have bed specials. Yeah, always get a mattress on special. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Also, you don't need to buy a beard base, Dan. Just get a mattress and some old pallets. Make a couple of pounds. And they'll also need little storage units. Yeah, anyone you bring home is going to really find that classy. Yeah. Now, I can't currently find a forklift on Timu. I can find, you know, some...

Forks. What are they calling them? Forks and pallet jacks. Oh yeah, a little pallet jack. Oh, you could get a pallet jack for your garage, for your big shed. Yeah, I love that. But no forklift. I love a sale, but I'm too broke, said Min.

I do Singles Day sales and Black Friday sales, and I don't get paid until after Singles Day, but before Black Friday. So nope, just going to stick to the one sale. That's financial responsibility. It is. That's saying I don't get paid until after Singles Day but before Black Friday. So nope, just going to stick to the one sale. That's financial responsibility. It is. That's saying

I don't have the money so I won't spend it. Most people would just tick it up. Tick it up on lay-by. Julian said, is this yet another day marketing people

have come up with to make consumers spend money? Thousand percent. Yes, you're right, Julian. And you're not cynical. She says, does this make me cynical? No, you've just seen throughian, and you're not cynical. She says, does this

make me cynical? No, you've just seen through the bullshit. Yeah. Which I believe is different. Which I think is also called being cynicism.

Yeah. No, if you're right. Hannah said, already done. Two pairs of shorts for the price of one. On Singles Day. It wasn't even Singles

Day when she submitted this. Good shorts weather at the weekend. Yeah, do you know what? I need to get some new shorts for summer.

Because, you know, I need to get, it's all about the fit for me. Yeah. For my fourth summer, no thrush. No thrush. You need a loose, sort of a loose flowing short. Yeah, I want not too much of a bit of structure. Yeah. It's where the structure is.

Right. You don't want it. You don't want a heavy gusset is what you're telling me. Thank you. You don't want a thick gusset. You want're telling me Thank you You don't want a thick gusset You want breathability Instead of a microfiber gusset Nah that'd be too thick

Would it Was that wicking You want a dry wicking gusset Yeah Maybe some I don't know Some active wear shorts Or something

Pockets A must Gotta have pockets Gotta have pockets But I think if I could Because I like a denim short in the summer. Me too.

Actually, I could go a denim short, but if just the gusset was sweat-wicking, that'd be great. That'd be great. Okay, great. Maybe just take out

the gusset entirely. Cut it out. I could cut it out and get a pair of sports shorts and patch them. Bingo. That's genius, actually. I'll make my own.

Ruby said, I want to, but I'm saving for a trip over the ditch in two weeks, so that takes priority. Jenna said, Sing. I'll make my own. Ruby said, I want to, but I'm saving for a trip over the ditch in two weeks. So that takes priority. Jenna said, Singles Day is on my birthday, and I've been single for the past four years. And I think like a bunch of Singles Day promo emails to really remind yourself that you're single again on your birthday. So yes, I will be treating myself.

Get out there and mingle. On single day. Yeah. Kat said, I hadn't thought to until I saw this poll. So maybe I will. I'm so sorry. Oh, the current. It's unnecessary spending. Yeah. Kat said, I hadn't thought to until I saw this poll, so maybe I will. I'm so sorry. We're going to influence unnecessary spending. Yeah, okay.

That's on us, and we apologise. It's still a little poll. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. The Grammy nominations are out for 2025. This is a ceremony that celebrates musical wonderment. Musical wonderment. Musical wonderment. Wonderment. Fletch, you will love the fact that Beyonce leads the Grammy nominations with 11 nods.

Look, I'm not anti-Beyonce. I'm just saying, apart from the early albums, a little overrated. You know what? A little overrated. But this means she's had 99 career nominations. I mean, crazy. She is phenomenal. And she totally deserves it.

I mean, she's amazing. Well, there are some hotly contested categories. You're playing my girl here. I thought I'd play your girl. I thought I'd play Chapel. She's got a few. She's got a few. She's got a few. I mean, was it seven?

She's got, she's up for Album of the Year, The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess, which we'll find this out on. It's not as good when you sing it. It's not as, yeah, she's up. She's up, she's, no, sorry, she's up for the Grammy, not you. I'm just saying, with backup, it could definitely win.

Is that what you're saying? Okay. 100. She's up for Album of the Year against Billie Eilish, Charli XCX, Sabrina Carpenter, Beyonce. Andre 3000 didn't even know he was back. What did he do this year? He did an album.

What a category. You blew some. And Taylor Swift's in that as well. Of course she is. Who is going to win that category? Charlie XEI. Yeah, Jacob. I don't know who he is either, but he's there. And I would say congratulations to him and shake his hand. Love the album. Never heard it.

Just Jacob. No, Jacob Collier. Oh, okay. He was just going by Jacob. Record of the year. Which is single of the year. Yeah. I don't know why they haven't changed that to single, yes.

The Beatles are nominated. What? For that AI one where they filled in the John Lennon bits. Oh, that's cheap. Disqualified. Disqualified.

Disqualified. That sucks. Like half of you are dead or in a home. Literal half. Yeah. Oh my God, I did see a video this morning,

though, of Ringo Starr, who I believe is 84 doing a concert and he was like, one, okay, I'll say two things. One, he was like bouncing up and down like a young man and I was like, look at him and his energy. And two, I kind of would.

He looked like a bang Ringo Starr. You would go to the concert. Is that a Thomas the Tank Engine thing? No, no, I mean Is that like a childhood? You were like left in front of the Thomas the Tank Engine thing? No, no. I mean Is that like a childhood? You have daddy issues and you were left in front of the Thomas the Tank Engine? No, he looked hot. He had this cool outfit on and I was like, Ringo Starr looks hot

and then I read that he was 84 and I was like, yeah, what's happening here? Okay, you need to sort yourself out. I don't know what's happening here. She's been in hotels all week and I doubt sorting herself out's the problem. She may have sorted herself out and never seen it. Can you put this on a talk point for your therapy this week? Yeah, I'll put it on the notes.

This week's therapy talk points. I found Ringo Starr quite attractive. Quite sexy. So the other songs in single of the year, Beyonce, Texas Hold'em, Sabrina Carpenter, Espresso, Charlie XCX360, Billie Eilish, Birds of a Feather, Kendrick Lamar, Not Like Us, Chapel Rowan, Good Luck Babe, and Taylor Swift and Post Malone, Fortnite.

What an a category. What an insane category. Like, how do you even pick? Do you just go for like which of those songs is streamed the most? I think you do Lucky Dip, put it all in a hat. Do you know what I mean? That's all that's fair. So what's the difference between Record of the Year and Song of the Year?

Because two categories later, there's another one called Song of the Year. One of them is about sales, isn't it? Like one of them takes sales into consideration. And the other's purely on an artistic. Well, tell me which one's about sales because next Song of the Year, there's Shaboosie, a bar song. It's about production.

Oh, really? Yeah. That was why when Lord won, Joel Little got to go up as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's about all the ba-ding, ding, ding, poo in the background. The ba-ding, ding, ding. The ba-ding, ding, got to go up as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's about all the ba-ding-ding-ding-poo in the background. The ba-ding-ding-ding. The ba-ding-ding-ding-poo in the background.

Those things. You don't notice them, but I do. Because I've got a musical ear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ba-ding-ding-ding-poo. Ba-ding-ding-ding-poo. Yeah, those kind of things. Song of the Year, Shaboosie.

Billie Eilish's Birds of a Feather. Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars, Die with a Smile. I know you guys love that song. Taylor Swift and Post Malone, Fortnite. Chapel Rowan, Good Luck Babe. Kendrick Lamar, Not Like Us. Sabrina Carpenter's in there again, but it's not Espresso. It's Please, Please, Please and Beyonce's Texas Holder.

How do you choose these categories? That's insane. It's a lucky dip. Yeah, it's been such a good year for pop music. Honestly, Sabrina and Chapel Rowan, it's so good. Best pop vocal album, Sabrina Carpenter's Short and Sweet, which I have never listened to, start to end, and I'm halfway through.

Okay. Because I was like, I'm just Chapel, Chapel, Chapel. So you're going now to Sabrina. I'm going to give Sabrina's album start to end. And I'll say so far, not as good as Chapel's album start to end. Okay, wow. It's good. The singles are great.

Don't get me wrong. The singles are great. You're a pop aficionado this year. Yeah, I really am. Billie Eilish's Hit Me Hard and Soft. Ariana Grande's Eternal Sunshine. Chapel Road. Of course, right.

I'm full of them. Princess and Taylor Swift's The Tortured Poets Department. Another insanely strong category. Any dud categories? Anyone nominated for a... A Razzie? The musical version of a Razzie. They don't do the musical Razzies, do they?

Nah, they should, though. Best pop solo performance, Beyonce, Sabrina Carpenter, Charlie XX, Billie Eilish and Chapel Ryan. Again, good luck. Bloody hell. Such strong music. Go the ladies.

Go the ladies. What's happening in the rock category? We got any Nickelback? Any Fearless? Rock's dead, eh? Rock's dead I'm scrolling down I haven't yet seen the word rock

Oh, right, yeah I've literally got to best comedy album Before I've got to best rock Best African What's on best comedy? Best comedy album Ricky Gervais, Dave Chappelle Jim Gaffigan, Nikki Glacier

And Trevor Noah Oh, again, hard category These are going to be insane to judge So in, we know February Did, Nikki Glazier, and Trevor Noah. Oh, again, hard category. These are going to be insane to judge. So in, we know February, did you say? February, yeah. That's award season, right? Yeah. Best rock album? Green Day, Pearl Jam, The Rolling Stones,

so the 1990s are back, everybody. Jack White, Idols, Fontaines, and the Black Crows. The Black Crows. The 90s are indeed back. No new music. Play. ZM's Fletch, Vaughn, and Hayley. the Black Crows. The Black Crows. The 90s R&D back. No new music. No new rock music. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Symphony in the Domain, Auckland Domain, next year, the 29th of March.

It's a Saturday. Examples, Cyril, Darude, The Dudes, Chorus, Symphony No. 6, New S new settlers, kings and more will be announced. You can get all the ticketing and event info at ZM Online. Joining us to play this morning, good morning, Paige. Oh, my God. Is that me? Yes. Well, I don't know.

Are you Paige? I've never, ever gotten through before, so I'm like. So technically, Paige, would you say you're a long-time listener, first-time caller? Yes, absolutely. Ding, ding, ding. Yay. Oh, welcome. Welcome, Paige. Well you say you're a long-time listener, first-time caller? Yes, absolutely. Ding, ding, ding, yeah! Oh, welcome. Welcome, Paige.

Well, this is exciting. Let's see if you can guess this. Now, Hayley is going to play a song from the symphony set list, and you've just got to... Oh, gosh. We'll just take the name of the song or the artist or both, whatever works. Are you ready? Um, I think so. How long does this song play for? Well, Hayley's

just gonna start now Hayley just yeah ready here we go um piano project no Um... Um... Um...

Piano project? No. Oh, I like you so much. I want to hear that. She takes off her dress now. Oh, my God. Um... I can't think of it. Oh, my God, it's right there.

That's right. What's that? Here it comes, here it comes, here comes the chorus. You're doing so well, Hayley. I know, thank you. I can keep playing forever. I love this song. I'm singing it in my head and I can't think of the name.

Here it comes. Which here it comes? I'm saying before I do it. It's not coming to me. Sorry, she took it all over. I've done all I can. Vaughan gave you a big clue there. White people everywhere are screaming at the radio. Oh, no, I can hear.

Hold on. What are you trying in your head? You're like, hold on, hold on. Paige, we'll give you five more seconds. Otherwise, we are going to have to go to the next caller. Hold on. I'm just getting a call on my phone from Mr. Brightside. I'll just answer it.

Okay. Hello? Yeah, she's not picking up on anything. Is it Mr. Brightside? No, wait. Hold on there, Mr. Brightside. I'm going to get back to you. Yes, it is.

Congratulations, Piers. Oh, my God. We got there. The name of them was right here, and I was like, oh, my God. Paige, I love that. We got there The name of them was right there And I was like, oh my god Paige, I love that We got there in the end You have won a double pass to Monica Farms

Symphony in the Domain Well done Oh, thank you Now I understand the pressure people get put under Thank you so much Over the weekend, August My daughter and I Engaged in the Second Lord of the Rings film

A few weeks ago We watched The first one Fellowship of the Ring I'm such a bad New Zealander I've seen the first one And then The Hobbit

No The trilogy is so good That's what she said to me At the weekend Which one's your favourite Because I said last week I was like I love Fellowship of the Ring

When we were watching it I said but I don't think It's the best movie in the trilogy And then I said to favourite? Because I said last week, I was like, I love Fellowship of the Ring. When we were watching it, I said, but I don't think it's the best movie in the trilogy. And then I said to her, I said, I think the Two Towers might be my favourite of the trilogy. Yeah, Two Towers is great. But then Return of the King. I can't wait till we watch Return of the King. Okay. But we need a weekend. Right. Because you may or may not be aware. They're quite long. These are phenomenally

long films. Like we were watching it and I said to her, I was like, man, I thought this happened towards the end of the movie and I paused it and we were watching it and I said to her, I was like, man, I thought this happened towards the end of the movie. And I paused it and we were only halfway through. Oh my God. I was like, so much happens in these movies. This is why I can't get around to watching them or any movie that's, there's so many

great movies that are three hours. You'll sit down and watch six hours of SWAT or some police procedure. Yeah, I know, but it's 40 minutes and then I get a break. And you get a little break. You can pause it and have a little break. You can do what I did with Oppenheimer and then just choose your own ending. No, that... When you've had enough, you just

go, and I'm out. No, you've got to keep watching after the bomb, Hayley. I keep telling you this. Wait, so you've watched Oppenheimer which is four hours, isn't it? Three and a half. Three and a half. And you haven't watched all the Lord of the Rings. Oppenheimer was like big screen movie. It was incredible.

I also think- But after the bomb went off, it was just a court drama. And I just thought, no, I'm good with the bomb. Is it? Because I still haven't watched. Well, there's repercussions. There's fallout. It's your result. I want a courtroom drama.

You know what? I've got no time for that. Who cares? Just watch the bomb go off. Is it Suits? It's Robert Downey Jr. in Suits at the end of Oppenheimer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pretty much.

Who plays Mike Ross? Who plays Harvey Spencer? Spectre. What was his name? Yeah, anyway, okay. Pretty much. Who plays Mike Ross? Who plays Harvey Spencer? Spectre. What was his name? Yeah, anyway, them. So we, I tell you what, the best part about watching these movies with someone who has,

is watching them with someone who has no idea what's happening. Like, no, she knows what's happening, but she's got no idea what happens next. Right. Spoiler alert, at the end of Fellowship of the Ring. Well, no, don't,

because, you've seen Fellowship of the Ring. You've heard long don't, because... You've seen Fellowship of the Ring. You've heard long enough. I've seen the fee, but I've forgotten about it. I'm going to have to start again at some stage. So you're of the idea, and the first time I read the book, I remember this, you're of the idea that Gandalf's dead. Oh, goodness.

Finds the bell of the famous You Shall Not Pass. He did fall off a stage the other week, didn't he? Did he? He's 3 and McAllen. Yeah. That's our other favourite game to play. Because these movies are so old. Oh, I know.

Like Harry Potter. Heaps in the dead. Dead. That's why August, because August's a huge Harry Potter fan. That's why I thought she was ready for Lord of the Rings. Sort of a grown-up Harry Potter,

if you will. It's quite scary. And our favourite game is Are They Still Alive? The minute someone looks old, she's like, Dad, are they still alive? No.

And it blows her mind that Serena McKellen's alive because he looks so old in this. But Christopher Lee, of course, set him on. He's dead. And the leader of Rohan, he died earlier in the year. So we play that game. But it's so much fun watching because when Gandalf came back,

she was just like, I've got pictures of her jumping up and down in the beanbag. He's back! Oh! And then when, of Of course Aragorn gets The second one gets dragged off a cliff And she's like well that's him out of it We're losing humans left right and centre

Because Sean Bean dies Boromir dies at the end of the first one It's so good I'd love to be excited about anything I'd love to get that excited about anything This is one of the good things about having kids You get to kind of leech their excitement. Right. No, they leech yours.

That's what's happened is you're leeching theirs back because they leeched yours all this time. You're under the exact wrong impression if you think I would have a more exciting life without children. Me, me, me. Think about it, me. No. Oh, now you've got me in the mood. I really want to... For children or Lord of the Rings?

Oh God, no. Just to watch Lord of the Rings on my own in my house with a Negroni and just no kids. It's really like the special effect. There's a couple of Gollum scenes because that's right. He comes in in this movie we just watched. She doesn't trust him. One iota. Good. She's got good. Samwise Gamgee, she's

not trusting him. She's like, no, I just would have straight up killed him. She doesn't trust Samwise. No, no. She trusts Samwise. Samwise doesn't trust Gollum. And she's like, no, I just would have straight up killed him. She doesn't trust Samwise. No, no, she trusts Samwise. Samwise doesn't trust Gollum. And she's like, Samwise has got it right here. But then I've got to tell her. I can't tell her that he's kind of crucial to the third movie. I know.

I'm really looking forward to it. But it's absolutely on the weekend. Because, Fletch, you've only watched the first one, should we do a movie marathon? Fletch, is my mic coming through? Yeah, it is coming through. I just don't know. Fletch, should we do a movie marathon?

I will say they are beautifully shot. And when I was walking the Heafy Track last week, I was like, this is very Lord of the Rings. And then I Googled and there's some parts. That was the Hobbit, eh? They filmed a river scene near the Heaffe track or in Kaharingi National Park. That's why I love doing the Tongariro crossing. It's so cool.

And that's why I think when you watch it now, it hasn't aged badly. There's some golem bits. The CGI is a bit like, but at the time it was groundbreaking. But because most of it is natural landscapes that are the beautiful part. Yeah.

It hasn't aged. Yeah. It's us, baby. That's us, baby. That's our country. New Zealand, we beautiful. We Yeah. It hasn't aged. Yeah. It's us, baby. That's us, baby. That's our country. New Zealand, we're beautiful. We're beautiful. Aotearoa.

Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. This is very funny to me. There is a woman who was needing some dental work done, and so she thought, you know what, I'm going to book that in. And she hadn't been to the dentist for a while, so she was ringing around a few dental clinics. And she hadn't been to the dental clinic because she was so she was ringing around a few dental clinics and she hadn't been to the dental clinic because she was nervous about pain,

which is very common. So she was emailing, basically trying to make sure that the place that she was going to go had, now I know it to be anesthesia, but what she typed to, I think about eight different dentists was, do you have euthanasia available?

I mean, enough. Wait, it's enough, painkiller. We'll surely do the trick. Is it anesthesia? Is that what they put you under? Or anesthetic is what they put into your gums, right? Anesthetic, yeah, yeah. Just anesthetic.

General or local. Right. Yeah, can you numb it? But she, to so many people, said, do you provide euthanasia? I'm not. I cannot handle pain. Do you provide euthanasia if I come to your clinic? Like, just kill me and then do my filling.

Please murder me and then make sure my teeth look great. It's not moida. No, it's not. You've given the permission. You've given the permission. It's opting out. It's opting out. No, it's not. You've given them permission. It's opting out. Oh, that's bad. It's such a good slip up.

It's a slip up. Yeah. Are we going to talk about people that use the wrong words? Because that's so good when you know someone. So my friend sent me a real estate listing. Because he's just looking at real estate. Yeah. But just looking. And it says, he's just looking at real estate. Yeah. But just like looking.

And it says, he's like, explain this to me. This home is for sale just outside of Hamilton. Enjoy the penultimate country lifestyle on the outskirts of Hamilton.

Penultimate? Then second to last. Yeah. So how is it the second to last country lifestyle on the outskirts of Hamilton? There's no more?

There's this one, one more, then no more country lifestyle for anyone. You go that one, then you go to the Ryman, and then you're dead. Oh, right. Is that what you're saying?

I think that's what the real estate agent means, right? Or is it literally the second to last house before it turns into big farms? It must be. Which is the only thing it could be. Surely they just meant ultimate, right? They just meant ultimate. Enjoy the ultimate country lifestyle.

That makes perfect sense. Yeah. Penultimate. Penultimate sounds like it means ultra ultimate, right? Yeah. But it doesn't. It means second to last in a weird twist. It's one of my favourite words.

You're right. They must mean like second to last house on the block. No, I don't think they do. I think they mean ultimate. They just put pen on the front because it makes it sound like they're trying to be flash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, bless. Well, maybe we should, I think, because this would happen all the time, sometimes it's

autocorrect as well, because my gynecologist, her name is Chern, right? C-H-E-R-N. Yeah. And I emailed her once, and it autocorrected to Chernobyl, so it just said, hi Chernobyl, here are some, you know, about gynecological issues. It's summer and I've got a thrush again. Hi, Chernobyl. Just letting you know, I've survived three summers, no thrush.

Thought you'd be proud. Regards. My love to your family, Chernobyl. Piers hoping for a fourth summer. Yeah. If I can find shorts. If I can find shorts with a breathable gusset. Yeah.

But I like your idea, Vaughn. I think we should get some messages and calls of like when you have made a wording boo-boo, you've completely put in the wrong word and it's just made no sense. Or maybe you were using a word for so long but you didn't know the meaning. And you just had it completely wrong.

Yeah. I love this. Yeah. I love it. I love when people do it. And if it's funny enough, I don't bother correcting them because I'm like, I'll get another laugh out of that next time I hear it. Yeah, totally. Yeah. And they're using it because I reckon it makes them feel smart.

Yeah. Yeah, 100%. It's always when you take a shot at using a word. Yeah. I think that's what it means. You know what hirsute means? What? Hairy. Hirsute, yeah. It means hairy. It doesn't sound like a shit. It literally is hair-sute. But you're saying hirsute. Now to me

it sounds like you're quite prompt and focused. Yeah. I used it once and my mother-in-law was just like, yes, like a stute. Right. I was like, what are you talking about? Yeah. Oh, sweetie. That's embarrassing. He made a huge observation. I was like, what are you talking about? Yeah. Oh, sweetie. That's embarrassing.

Yeah, it was. He made a hairy observation. Okay, 0800DARLS at M. We'd love to take your calls now. Text through 9696. Shout out to the person who's kicked off the phone and topic by saying they were asking for anal leave for years. Oh, my God.

Both in the spoken and written word. Every time they asked, they wrote anal. It is not your workplace's business what you do with your leave. That's right. That you accrue anally, of course, every time the calendar goes round. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. There was a woman looking for some dental services.

She was emailing around all these dentists asking if they provided, for pain relief, euthanasia. Now she has misused a word there. She obviously means anesthesia or, you know. Shout out to the person who did this though, because she obviously was spelling euthanasia right? Yeah. She would have had to Google how to spelling euthanasia right? Yeah. She would have had to Google how to spell euthanasia. Euthanasia, yep.

Yeah, yeah. The EU really throws you off. There's no why in there. This is, so many messages and calls. This is great. Sarah, this was mum?

Yeah, yeah. So, it was a few years ago. Mum was printing out some business cards online and it was very late at night and she found out about a week ago when she got the cards in the mail

that she spelt accounts without the O. Now, wait, wait, don't say it. We can all imagine. It's a bit like when the light goes off on the countdown sign. Yes. We've all seen that photo, haven't we? Oh my god, how many did she

print? About 500. Yeah, it was a lot. Did they not see it? She obviously had to redo them all. It always blows my mind that printing places don't have an eye over these things, right? Like, do they not care? Do you know what? If you were working at the printing place, you'd be like, that is not my problem.

That is very funny. I'm going to print them. That's on you. Yeah. They probably had a good giggle. Yeah. And then, then they'll get to reprint them when she has to pay for the next round. Exactly. Sarah, thank you. Chelsea, what was the, the typo or the word that you were using wrong?

So I had a friend who was religious and I went along with her to her church and they asked me if they were reading from the Bible. I get up there and I'm real nervous because there's like 100 people watching. Wait, you're just going for the first time and they're dragging you on stage. Well, like I went to like the youth group. Oh yeah, okay. And like, yeah, like not that I was religious,

but I just, yeah, it was fun. Okay. So yeah, anyway, so I get up on the church podium thing and I'm saying the speech, and I get back down. I'm real, real proud of myself. Like, it was scary. And my friend looks at me like, dude, just what? And I'm like, what?

I thought I did well. I just said, it's disciple, not disiples. Oh, disiples. Jesus and his 12 disiples. Disiples. Did you notice a ripple in the room when you said disciple? No, because I was so preoccupied with making sure I got to my speech. Oh, my God.

Disciples. Disciples. That's so good, Chelsea. Thank you. Shelly, what was the word that you used wrong or the typo? We were doing a brochure for quite a new fancy retirement village. Okay. And we were talking about how amazing all the security was in the area

and there was a huge heading talking about their amazing pubic lighting instead of their public lighting. Brilliant. I do love how close that is. Everybody. It got past clients, it got past printers, it got past us. Nobody picked it up. So it got printed and it got past printers, it got past us. Nobody picked it up. So it got printed and it got sent out.

It's a bit like, you know, you see those things online and they're like, did you notice the word, the letters missing in these words? And then you're like, you look back over it and you actually, you notice them when they've been pointed out. Yeah, because your brain doesn't read every letter. It just goes, here's the word. It looks right in your brain.

And everyone's so focused on the actual body text, and the headings sometimes just get completely missed. Genius. So that was a goodie. Great. How was the pubic lighting, though? Was it good? It was excellent pubic lighting.

You want to lighten that from below, don't you? Yeah, you do. Cast a shadow. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. We're talking about when someone just basically used a word wrong. Maybe a mispronunciation, maybe not a correct. Because somebody asked for euthanasia rather than anesthetic.

Completely the wrong word. She'd emailed like, she'd asked like 10 doctors, eh? Or 10 dentists rather. 10 dentists is so good. Some messages in. Somebody said, oh my God, that just, your caller saying about Jesus' disciples. Yep. Reminds me when our head girl got up to read from the book of Piss Arms.

Piss Arms. Piss Arms. Oh my God, Piss Arms. It's just Psalms, I think. What's your favourite Piss Arm as a man of the Lord? 3-4. 34, I believe. No, 3.4.

Yeah. Piss Arms. Some other people. There's some absolutely brilliant situations going on with public sign writing. Brilliant. Somebody else said, my dad had the public slash pubic situation happen. He was a registered public valuer. Right.

But his business card said he was a registered pubic valuer. Priceless, to be honest. Every time, priceless. My auntie was telling us how great it was that a new house came with shackles. She just kept saying the shackles. It's great. It's kind of a shackles. But she meant chattels.

Yeah, the list of stuff that comes with the house. But she thought the word was shackles. The nights are all shackles. Quite a few people saying, I was in a CPR course, and other people have said I'm a nurse, and when we're trying to teach the students, we're like, what do you do next? And they said, well, our next thing would be to arouse the patient.

Not rouse the patient. Arouse and rouse, two very different things. You don't want to be doing that. CPR course, the instructor. It would wake me up out of a coma. It really would. How ever would it wake up to mouth to mouth too, as well as if both ends, you know?

Jesus. The instructor in our CPR course kept telling us to arouse the patient. We were all trying so hard not to laugh until someone cracked and then we're all just laughing. Oh, my God. They were taking the course. Huh? They were taking the course.

How many times have they said that? Arouse all the time. Oh, my God. I once emailed a dispatcher with a list of times saying, can I book the below jobs but missed the E, so I said, can I book the blow jobs? He replied pretty quickly with yep literally any of those times are fine

book them all in excited there someone said my mum works at a medical practice a new doctor started and mum came home and she said he is just lovely used to be a pedo and said it to everybody and we're like mum no no no no

no no no no no no no what do, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don't show that one. What do you mean? She's like, well, he worked in the paediatrics department. Yeah, yeah. Mum, you don't know. No, you'd say he was in paediatrics. You don't say the new doctor's lovely.

Used to be a paedo. Even despite that, he's lovely though. He's lovely. There's so many. Went to a GP with hip pain. She said, sounds like a labral tear my father messaged me asking me what it was and I

texted my dad back 75 year old man and I said I believe she believes it's a labial tear and he said I thought it was your hip Dad knew Dad knew the labial Dad knew yeah Dad knew the labia. Dad knew.

Yeah, there's so many. I've read some that you might think, Vaughan, some of those are inappropriate. There's some that are worse. Oh, I bet. There's some that are so much worse. Oh, my God. He's thinking of it. He can say it or not.

Popcorn. Yes. But changed the P with the C. Oh, God. Someone's grandmother went up to the movies, they took their grandmother to the movies and she walked up. So she wanted just like a light bit of dyslexia or something. Well, no, she just got confused and then the person behind the thing's eyes lit up

and then they were like, beg your pardon, and she said the same word multiple times. So I think, she just got confused and then the person behind the thing's eyes lit up and then they were like, biggie putter, and she said the same word multiple times. So I think she was just confused. Did she end up finding it and can she send me a link, though? A big bucket of nice, hot yellow batteries. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

43 days away from Christmas and we're giving you the chance to win. Who are you Christmas-ing? ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley have their ticket home. and we're giving you the chance to win. Who are you, Chris, missing? ZM's Flashborn and Hayley have their ticket home. Yes, Chris missing. See what we did there? Who are you missing?

It was really clever. We were pretty stoked with ourselves when we came up with this. We were pretty stoked about it. Yeah, we were. We kind of high-fives and a bit of a chuckle after that. So we're giving you the chance to bring someone who is going to miss Christmas home for Christmas. Christmas is all about family, isn't it? Friends, family, spending time with loved ones,

and of course Jesus, but predominantly friends and family. Or if you're Fletch, South America probably. I'll do it early Christmas. No, the day in South is all about family and South America. Yes, okay, sure. But if you are missing someone and maybe they have moved to London or Australia or the US, wherever, you can register them and yourself and then we could bring them home back to New Zealand with premium economy return flights.

We're going to shout out here to United Airlines for helping make these Christmas dreams come true. To get that United Airlines and New Zealand can show you more of the USA. Yeah. I still think we're, even on the back of the pandemic, we still haven't

seen our loved ones as much as you know we would like to. I'm not going to see my brother this Christmas and he's only in Australia. But it's hard to get it all planned and organised. This I think would be a great thing for siblings to team

up on. One in the country obviously that enters the one that's overseas. Surprise mum and dad. I hadn't even thought about the tears. And then dad cries. Oh, yeah. Oh, yes, dad cries. Got him.

And then the dog freaks out. They're like... Yeah. I love those videos. Well, yeah, whether it's like a sister, a brother, if it's your friend that you miss, whoever it is, go to ZM Online and register. Tell us who you're Christmasing

and we could get them back to New Zealand for Christmas all thanks to United Airlines. So register at ZM Online. Plenty of Kiwis overseas in London and the likes. How long are we going to give you to register? A couple of weeks? Yeah, so you've got

lots of time, but get on to it now and I'd love to talk to people. We should talk to people over the next couple of weeks. Yeah, so you've got lots of time, but get onto it now and I'd love to talk to people. We should talk to people. Over the next couple of weeks, get people on there. Ask them who they're missing. Yeah, how long it's been since I've seen them. Yeah, so if you want to get in the draw and you want to bring a

family member, a friend, home for Christmas, ZM Online. Aren't we nice? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Chicken Chicken has gone viral on TikTok and online and it's all because of a British cheap travel expert. Her name's Chelsea Dickinson and she is talking about the fact that

if you leave your check-in to the very last minute or to, you know, just before departure, hours before maybe, you are more likely to get a better seat than if you check in early, say when check-in opens for your flight. No, I always reserve my seat and I always pick a good one. Yeah, but a lot of airlines don't let you even pick a seat for free. Yeah. Whereas, like, you will get a seat for free, and you'll be able to lock it in, no problem. But a lot of airlines...

Usually when you book the ticket, you can lock it in, and you always try to get one towards the front. Yeah, and so she said, and, you know, like the home of cheap airlines like Ryanair and EasyJet in the UK and stuff. Yeah, the lingus. Yeah, so they, she's saying that this has worked nine out of ten times. Really?

For the past year, ten flights. She's got a good seat. Why do you think that is, that they reserve the good seats until the last people? Because they're trying to sell these seats. And people don't want to pay, so they're just rolling the dice on a good seat at check-in. Because my friend who came over recently, he was like, I can't select a seat without paying.

And he's like, there are no good seats that I can select. So he just went to the airport and ended up getting exit rows. Because no one had paid on these long-haul flights $90 to sit there. Because they were ridiculously priced. And he ended up getting good seats because he literally just rolled the dice and got them at the airport. I'm here for this. I'm here for this.

But I – because I always – What if you get a middle seat? Because you roll the dice and you get a middle seat. I know. Because I – you guys are always like, have you checked in if we're going somewhere with work? And I'll be like Oh I didn't even think about it

And so on the way to the airport I always As soon as it opens I check in Just so I get a good seat Right Yeah me too I want a window or an aisle

I don't You just don't want a middle seat You don't want a middle seat That's the goal The middle seat is hell on earth That is pure hell And if someone's on the aisle And you go window

Unless there's a solo traveller Which they're often are They won't They won't want to sit middle if they're selecting that seat. No, no one wants to sit middle. I'm checking in for my flat right now, babes. So this check-in chicken, the idea is if you're not like a premium, because if you're premium, you get access to better seats, right? Yeah, so if you're like a lounge member or you've got some kind of status,

they might let you select a seat for free. Yeah. Then that's not a problem. But, yeah, if you don't have that, and then some airlines that make you pay for your seats when you're booking your flight, they might open them up in the 24 hours before. Gotcha.

So you can select it then. But also like chicken, chicken, that's quite, I wouldn't play this overseas. I've been in American airports where flights are so oversold. Like the last flight I was on, they were offering people like $1,000. Do you remember when I talked about this? To change.

To get off the flight. I was like, you don't want to be leaving check-in so late that you don't make your flight. No, you need to be going on these. This sounds like it would work in Europe. Yeah. With so many airlines and so many destinations. Yeah, from the UK.

But that's an idea if you want to play check-in, check-in. I don't know. It doesn't suit. No, I like to be like checked in. I thought when this chicken chicken got mentioned

and you said it was something I would like, I was imagining when you're in the line to check in, you've got chicken. Wings. Like wings.

And now I'm disappointed because there's no mention of wings. You've got to eat the wings before you get to the counter. Yeah. Or if you don't, you have to put them

through the x-ray machine and explain to security why you are taking delicious wings on board. I don't think wings is a good in-line option. But that's why I thought it was a game because you've got the sloppy fingers and you have to get stuff out of your thing and they want to see your passport. You've got to take your shoes off

all the while eating as many wings as you can. Terrible game. You've got to have to go to Nuggies. Something more... Yeah. Something've got to have to go to Nuggies, something more. Yeah. Something easier. More line appropriate, Nuggies. Yeah. I've got to have that bone.

Fact of the day is next. What's the topic this week? Fizzy drinks. Fizzy? Fizzy drinks. Oh, fizzy drinks. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. It's time for...

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day It's some fizzy drink week Fizzy drink Fizzy pop, soda pop Soft drinks. Okay. At fact of the day. Quick.

I thought about doing this as the first fact. Okay. But then I was like, it's not enough of a fact. Okay. Is that they're called soft drinks because they're not hard alcohol. They were the soft alternative to hard beverages. Right. Hard beverages being spirits. That's why they, in America, they call like hard lemonade, like we would call

just a lemonade RTD or whatever. Yeah, they call it hard, and hard seltzer has alcohol in it, whereas seltzer can not have alcohol in it. Oh, let's go soft. The soft equivalent. But also, not all this is not, hmm, how do you say this?

Not all soft drinks are fizzy, but all fizzy drinks are soft drinks. Yeah. I understood that immediately, actually. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? But in New Zealand, we wouldn't call juice soft drinks, would we? No.

But they do in America. They call it, choose from our soft drinks menu. And so we're like, you're only going to be seeing your fizzies there. I mean, let's be honest, there's very little fruit in fruit drinks. Very little. Very little. It may as well just be called sugar drinks. Yeah.

But that's not today's fact of the day about fizzy drinks. I'd like to touch on 7-Up, if I may. When was the last time you had a 7-Up? Ages. Ten years ago. At least, right? I couldn't tell you. Do they still have it here?

Yeah. I don't even really know what it tastes like. Isn't it just, oh, that's Pepsi Sprite, eh? No, Sprite is the Coca-Cola company. Yeah. 7-Up. Oh, this is Pepsi Sprite. Yes, yes, yes.

I thought you meant Pepsi is Sprite. No, it's Pepsi Sprite 7-Up. I get confused when you're Mountain Dew. Complete. Mountain Dew is very different to 7-Up. Mountain Dew reminds you you're alive. Yeah. For all the wrong reasons.

Yeah. But 7-Up, the original name of 7-Up, before it was changed, was, hold on, it's disappeared. It's gone to a different page. Bib. Bib. It was originally called, I've got too many facts on the go here. It's all happening. 7-Up Lithiated Lemon Soda was what it was called after it changed because in 1948 when the FDA was like,

we can no longer just be popping medicines and soft drinks. That's right. Sounds like a great rule. They had to take out lithium citrate. Lithium citrate was in 7-Up and lithium citrate is also used as a mood stabilizer in psychiatric treatment of manic states and bipolar disorder. And that was in a fizzy drink. It was in fizzy drink,

and that was one of the reasons when they changed the name and changed the ingredients, they called it 7-Up, because for a lot of people, it was a mood booster. It was an upper. It was a bit of an upper. That is wild. They used to give lithium to, you know, your hysterical housewives and whatnot.

Yeah. To sedate them because they're like, oh, gosh, she's gone mad. Give her some lithium. You'd be like, ugh. God, she's asking for a job. She's asking to go and work. Oh, my God.

Give her some 7-Up. She's lost her damn mind. Give her some 7-Up. Give her some of that lithium, the lithium, lithium good stuff. So, Bibb label lithium, Bibb label lithiated lemon lime soda was its original name.

Hell of a mouthful. Not nearly as catchy. Wrap that around a bottle. Marketing is going to be hard. Yeah. And it was also like they weren't making a secret of the fact that it had a mood stabilizing drug in it. Really? It'll make you feel good.

That's insane. So yeah, and the whole thing changed and the FDA said we can't just be popping medicines and soft drinks. And what year did you say that changed? 1948. Oh, right. Okay. They came in and said you can't just be popping medicines and soft drinks. And what year did you say that changed? 1948. Oh right, okay. They came in and said you can't be doing that anymore so they needed a new name. Now the 7 Up, everybody assumes it's because

it would boost your mood, the upper, but where does the 7 come from? 7 days a week baby. Atomic mass of lithium is 7. It had 7 main ingredients so when it was first packaged it was in 7 ounce bottles versus Coca-Cola's six to make it look like a better deal when purchasing. It's never been settled on exactly why. They think it might be a lost

secret of the soda empire that is 7-Up. But today's fact of the day is 7-Up, originally under a different name, Biblabel Lithiated Lemon L 7-Up, originally under a different name, bib-labeled lithiated lemon-lime soda, once contained a mood-stabilizing drug. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Hayley, we're having real fun up here in the studio. Yeah, I know.

I'm a bit jealous. It's not that I'm not having fun through the line. Yeah. But I'm just sort of here with my bottle of Antipodes still water and I'm just by myself. Oh, okay. She must be paying her a fortune to do seven days live because she can afford an antipodes

steel bottle. I actually felt sorry to just cough straight to the mic. Yeah, that's not professional at all. I found this in the hotel room and it was so like, it was kind of Oh, Han, that's minibar water. That's not free. Han, not my credit

card on the room, so. Oh my God, when you go away with seven days, it's someone else's credit card. Because our work, we have to pay. I know. How the TV half live, eh? I know. I don't think that's a thing anymore. I don't think saying, man, those TV guys have flushed with cash is a thing anymore.

Yeah, I don't think it is. Yeah, definitely not. There's only about four of them left, I think. Yeah. Anyway, I have, so I'm on tour at the moment. And I definitely have been having more of an impulsive year than ever before. I'm known for my whimsical behaviour, but I have been making sort of lifelong commitments to being whimsical.

You know, I got two tattoos earlier this year, and then on Friday I just had a, it just came to me in a sort of a thought, an idea for a tattoo. And so I just booked it and I got it yesterday. Just like that? Yeah, just like that. Oh, see, I don't know. I've just never, I don't have a single tattoo and I just don't feel the urge.

I think because I had a few and I hadn't gotten any for years, I was always like, oh my, they have to really be well thought out. I've got to really think about them. Now I'm like, oh, just, you know, Pokemon. Just get it on. I'm going to catch them all. Just get it on. And then I was like, I was looking at my legs because I've been rocking around in some short shorts,

in my short gym shorts, and I was like, it would be fun if I had a little tattoo. So I just went and got one. I just did it. Now these are on the back of your legs? Yeah, backs of my thighs. It just says Galileo Figaro, which is a lyric to from Bohemian Rhapsody. It's the part in Wayne's World Fletch when they're in the car. Yes, I know.

I just thought, well, I actually already have a Bohemian Rhapsody tattoo. It was my first one I ever got and it's looking a bit rough, so I was like, I'll just get another one. And it was fun. I just booked it. There was a place that had a booking. I went and got it done. Shout out to Autatahi Tattoo.

Is this a Wayne's World tattoo then? No, it's a Queen tattoo. So I like to think it's a Wayne's World tattoo. I'm going to say to people, I'm going to be like, Hayley, show these people your Wayne's World tattoo. Well, then I looked up, because obviously Figueroa in some...

Was the goldfish from the Pinocchio story, wasn't it? Yeah, or it can be another name for Jesus in some stories. Oh, wow, okay. It's not a godly tattoo. And Galileo. The astral. Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo. Every time you wear shorts, it's going to be visible.

I know this is my first because I've got eight tattoos now, but this is my first one that you'll see all the time, basically. It's a big, big commitment because I'm just being impulsive. Yeah, and she's got her Trump 2024 tattoo on her lower calf, which is amazing because you got that before the election. She knew. She knew. Good fan.

I knew. I supported him from the get-go. You haters, you doubted him. Trump is our president. Make America great again. USA. USA. I think he's just great.

He's doing great things for women. I thought the tattoo was out there, to be honest. Yeah, but you would like to take some calls along this line. Because I am feeling so impulsive at the moment. And I know a lot of my friends are also doing the same thing. It doesn't have to be a tattoo, but I want to know, people, what was your impulsive move in the recent weeks? Or in the recent last while, let's not limit it too much.

Yeah, I want to limit it too. We want calls, Hayley. We want, I don't know, you've been here a while. A little peek behind the curtain there. What Hayley's done is made, she's cut a lot of the audience out from participating because she said recently. Yep. Fletch in turn has opened it back up By saying No no

Everybody's welcome To just call us With their most Impulsive purchases In the month of November 2024 What was your Of the 11 days so far

But maybe it was You know like I saw another Woman I follow On Instagram At the moment She was just like You know what

Everyone's got to Shave their head once And she had like Hair down Like below her waist And she would just Cut it off That's ballsy. Big call.

I want to know your most impulsive move. Maybe it was just booking a holiday. Because you know, you hover over that book button, you do it and then you've spent all that money and you're going. And then you find out that it wasn't even including flights. It was just the accommodation package and you've made a huge

mistake. Now it's going to cost way more money. Now I've got to apply for a credit card that I can't afford. It did seem too good to be true and I didn't read enough. Okay, well. It could totally be

a purchase or a move or a change of look or just something that. As somebody messaged in, will you also be accepting stories on crisis piercings?

Oh, yes. I mean, it could technically be a lot of these stories could be midlife crises. Yes. Couldn't they? Well, I would have planned those at a midlife.

The quarter life crisis is a big crisis now. It is. Yeah, it's a thing. 0800 dials at M. Call us now. You can text through 9696. What was your impulsive move that you made? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. I would like to know your impulsive move that you've made because Friday it just popped into my head an idea for a tattoo and yesterday I got it and that was Sunday. And I'm just feeling very impulsive at the moment. And a lot of people are. Something in the

air. Something in the air. Quarter life. Midlife crisis maybe, whatever it is. It's quarter for me. Yeah, obviously quarter for you. I'll be 140. Leah, good morning. Good morning. What was your impulsive decision?

I bought a ticket to have a photo with Jason Marmour at Armageddon. Oh, yeah, right. If that's not impulsive, that just makes sense in the universe, you know? Like, of course. Well, it does, but we were on the Sunday and he wasn't meant to be there because he was on the Saturday. And over the loudspeaker when we were there

that he was going to pop in for a bit. Right. If you don't mind me asking, what does one of those photos cost? $130. $130? Oh, my God. We got a photo for free, didn't we?

That was nice of them to charge us. That was going through my mind. Did you give him a little squeeze? I did a little bit. He's nice to squeeze, eh? He's nice to squeeze he's nice to squeeze solid back yeah

solid back he does yeah solid back my daughter was happy as well oh yeah so did you pay for each of you

to get a photo oh no no no that's one photo just one photo oh yeah right okay oh yeah nice nice you can see why they go to these

Armageddons and stuff I know if that's what they're charging Leah thank you Jen what was your impulsive decision Oh, yeah, right. Okay. Oh, yeah, nice, nice. You can see why they go to these Armageddons and stuff. If that's what they're charging. Leah, thank you. Jen, what was your impulsive decision? Oh, hey, guys. Long-time listener, first-time caller. Oh, welcome. Can we maybe pitch the bell?

Yes. Welcome, Jen. Welcome. Welcome, Jen. Welcome. Hey, so I follow someone on Instagram and saw that they got a tattoo. You might know her. Her name's Hayley Sproul.

Oh, my God. She's not an influencer, is she? Oh, gosh. She is an influencer. Hashtag influence. What did you do? So I then started following Sammy Tattoos. Shout out.

You did my tattoo, yep. I had been planning on getting my three kids' names tattooed, but instead I got a badger. A badger. Dude, that's a great choice. Badgers forever. Children will break our hearts, badgers will not. Badgers forever. No, just a tradition badge, I think.

Okay, sounds nice. I love this. Oh, do you not want to see a photo of your badge or tattoo? Oh, absolutely. Yeah. He's called Benson Hufflepuff III. Picture perfect. Picture perfect, man.

Benson after Benson Bone from my eldest daughter, Hufflepuff, because that's the, you know, as you know, the Harry Potter. Yeah, house that's the, you know, as you know, the Harry Potter house represented by the... And then another friend said Benson Hufflepuff sounds really posh. So, yeah, now he's Benson Hufflepuff. Wow. Okay, very much like you, because you got your cat done, didn't you, Hayley? Yeah, that's Sammy who did my cat.

So you would have seen that and thought she could do a badger. I love this. Great badger. Thanks, Jen. Terry, Terry, what was your impulsive move? Well, after swearing that I'd never get a tattoo, after 47, well, I was actually 54, made the promise at seven to my dad that I'd never get one

after he got me a hiding. Wait, what was the hiding for? What was the hiding for at seven? Did you say you were getting a tattoo? Or did you give yourself a pen tattoo? Because I'd started scratching a girl's initials in my forearm. I hadn't inked it. Oh, my God.

At seven? Very. Jesus. You're giving yourself a prison tattoo. We have a whore of a men. Yeah. Okay. So at 54, I got my entire left pec tattooed with my girlfriend's name.

Oh, wow. Is she still your girlfriend? No. Oh, mate. Terry, this is 70. Terry, no. Is your father still with us? Pardon?

Was your father still with you at the time that you did this? Is he still alive? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did he give you another hiding? He has an eye, bloody Will. That stupid boy. Are you going to be able to cover that up, Terry?

Luckily, it's in Kanji. And her name means love in Nepalese. That's all right. Fantastic. Well, that's what you can tell the next girlfriend. Just means love. Definitely not my ex's name can tell the next girlfriend. Just means love.

Definitely not my ex's name. I just looked up Nepalese for love. I did an auto-translate. Sharon. The word is Sharon. G'day, Sharon. Yeah. Sherry, thank you.

ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. What about impulse purchases? Some would say midlife crisis, but not everybody. Hayley's got two new... Do you count this as a single tattoo or two new tattoos? Oh, because I've got two words, one on each leg. I'd say it's one. Yeah, but you got them at the same

time, like it was a unit. They go together. It's one. It's a team. It's a two-parter. Yeah. But I am. I'm feeling impulsive. I've already thinking about the next ones. Somebody said... It's on the neck. It's a big spider web on the neck. Yeah, that's cool. And does it come around Onto the throat

Actually neck tattoos Are hot eh What Okay on the right person A neck tattoo 100% I was mocking it I want it

Not on me Not you You're not a neck tattoo You want the person On the person who's on me On you yeah On the person who's on me Yes okay cool

Yeah Bought a spa pool yesterday Woke up Thought Man I want a spa pool. Is that what Hayley texted? Owned one by 11am. I'm holding off because I'm trying not to be impulsive, but I would love a spa pool.

Yeah. Somebody else said, I was getting into the habit of getting quite a few impulsive tattoos, so I just bought a tattoo gun and cut out the middle man I also brought an MX5 Okay that's Screaming midlife crisis What's an MX5?

One of those little hairdresser cars Little red convertible Mazdas to flick up headlights Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah funny Homosexual men drawn to them endlessly As well as boy racers Because they're rear wheel driving A very quick 1600

Get that thing sideways But then mums also love them It's a big demo Mums do love them Actually a big demo Yeah actually a huge Venn diagram Of people that are interested In Mazda MX

If someone said to me Here's an MX-5 I'd take it Because I've driven one before It was fun Did your brother-in-law Used to have one Is that what he had

Yep That was the family's MX-5 That he got off his mother Yeah right See again mums love them Yeah I'd take it because I've driven one before and it was fun I was like a doker did your brother-in-law used to have one is that what he had yep that was the family's MX-5 that he got off his mother yeah right see again mums love them yeah and then that sex worker

cut open the roof with a knife that's right to get into steel stuff that's why you don't park on the K Road side roads yeah

that's right booked an impromptu holiday to the Cook Islands on a very short notice nice not on you very nice that's my sort of impromptu holiday to the Cook Islands on very short notice. Nice. Nice. Very nice. That's my sort of impromptu-ness.

I don't even know you and you deserve that. Flew to Mexico to have a surgery. Half of my family don't know, so don't call me. What kind of surgery? They don't say I look cosmetic? Yeah. Do you reckon? I reckon.

Then the family know, right? Yeah, or you just, what, come back from holiday and maybe you've lost a little bit? Or you could be like a gastric band or something. Yeah, oh yeah, so that would kick in later, so they might not know. And then you'd be like, oh man, you're getting shredded. You're like, yeah, but...

Gym, I'm gymming. Just gym bra, protein gym. I have two quite recent impulsive moves. I booked a trip to Japan for my family of six. None of them know about it yet. And we bought a house on deadline sale on the last day we offered it before I'd even seen it in person.

Oh, you've got to know. How the hell are you going to Japan and buying a new house? Maybe they won the lotto. Maybe. Maybe that's our 10 millioner. Yeah. Yeah. I bought a house because my wife said we need a bigger house to fit the table she wanted because I got a charcoal barbecue. And then she was like, well, if you get that, I get a table, but we need a bigger house because fit the table she wanted because I got a charcoal barbecue.

And then she was like, well, if you get that, I get a table, but we need a bigger house because the table I want is too big for our area. So then we bought a new house. I don't know how people are doing that. Just get a smaller table, maybe. Even just the paperwork. Yeah.

You have to be like, hi, bank, more money, please. Yeah. No, like, are you sure this is a good idea? You're like, no, please, more. And then you just put it off forever, I assume. Yeah. No, like, are you sure this is a good idea? You're like, no, please, more. And then you just put it off forever, I assume. Yeah. You try it.

Had bought sexy lingerie. Oh. An impulse buy. And invited hubby to remove lingerie after kids had left the house. Great time. Oh, my God. Good for you. That makes me so happy.

Yeah, that's nice, eh? I impulsively purchased an alpaca. Now, that's at the other end of the scale. That's, yeah. Aren't they spitty? Are they the spitty ones or dumb? Spitty. Screamy.

Screamy. Does it look so cute? Dumb. I want one. They scream and they sound like monkeys being murdered and they're not meant for this environment and I would warn you against that. Sharp, you're such a buzzkill, man.

Be more impulsive. Get your footland. Get our packets. No, no, no. Went for breakfast at McD's. Yep. Show sponsor. Yeah, show sponsor.

And bought a new car on the way home. Just saw it. Fantastic. Love that. Yeah, that's good. I'm done with the show. Are you finished? Finished. You're done. I'm that. Yeah, that's good. I'm done with the show. Are you finished? Finished.

You're done. I'm finished. Are you feeling impulsive enough to finish maybe a minute earlier than we probably should? Done. Love this impulse. No further words, Your Honour. I love this.

Ta-ta. Hey, remember how you just gave that Uber driver five stars because you wanted five stars back? Yes. Let's do that with this podcast. Oh, yeah. Review it five stars tell your friends and we'll do the same for

you if you ever need a review for anything. But where are you giving me my five stars? Well I don't know. Do you own a restaurant or something?

Yes. If you give us five stars on this podcast tell us where you would like your review and we'll review even where we won't even go.

We'll just review your thing. I don't want people to know where my restaurant is. I'm doing one of those secret restaurants. Oh I was going to say

because that's exactly the opposite of how restaurants work. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley.