ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 12th August 2024

Episode Date: August 11, 2024

Breast Implants  Top 6: Things you don't need money for  Boomer Moves  Silly Little Poll!  How much Leave do you have?  Hayley got Lost  Vaughan in the Waiting Room  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Flesh, Fawn and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Welcome to the show, Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. Three minutes past six. You've got a little... I do, a little bit of a cold.

A little sniffle. Yeah. I think it's because on Friday after I did my charity work, and I don't want to talk about it. I don't often bring up my charity work that I do, but I hosted the Cure Kids Gala. Raised a lot of money. It was good.

Anyway, when I got home, it was really late. And I was so tired. I got out of the shower and I had a big fluffy robe on. Then I got into bed with two duvets. Woke up in the middle of the night sweating. You overdid it. You overdid it. Overheated yourself.

So I was like, you know, wet neck. And I think I caught a chill from the sweat. Do you know what we need to do is put up one of those screens. Those old COVID screens. Like the dairies still have. They're like not even a metre wide and a metre tall. Oh, no, it's not COVID. It'll be all right.

Because... No, I'm not... You know me. I'll go... I'm not a Vaughan. This isn't a two-week issue. It'll drag. This will be gone in two days.

I'm not a Vaughan. This will be gone in two days. He's going to take that? No, she's not wrong. They do hang around for a long time. This dude takes like a week off work

when he gets sick. I can't wait. I've got one coming up. Spring. It's the change of season. Do you want a kiss? Get it going now. It's always the pre-winter

in the spring. Yeah. And they knock me for a week. Yeah. Classic. We just hang out, me and Fletch, and get on with it.

Vaughan's on the nasal sprays. Oh, yeah. See, we handle colds very Classic. We just hang out, me and Fletch, and get on with it. Vaughn's on the nasal sprays. Oh, yeah. See, we handle colds very differently. We do. Vaughn and I. Coming up on the show, you've got the top six for us, Vaughn. You'd like that, wouldn't you? You wish.

You wish. Vaughn's just stalling for time while he... No, no, I remember. Because I didn't win Lotto at the weekend. $44 million went to an Auckland-based MyLotto player. I know. I woke up and you guys said, guys, it's on you. Check your ticket.

And I checked and I got four bonus lines. Check yourself before you wreck yourself. And not $44 million. It wasn't me. We won $30 and you don't get a dollar of it. We're not sharing that in the syndicate? No. $23 on the Smith ticket get a dollar of it. We're not sharing that in the syndicate? No. $23 on the Smith ticket.

You won $23. Shoot, so we made $53. Yeah, and then they spent between us. $75. Way more. Yeah, way more than that. Way more than that. Good return on investment there.

It's charity. It's charity. That's top stuff. So I've got the top six things you don't need money for. Guys. Yeah. Coming up on the show as well, a couple of chances today to go in the draw

to see Sabrina Carpenter live in the USA. You've got to be listening out for that mother trucker and call through immediately. Immediately. On 0800-DARLS-IT-M when you hear that. But next on the show, the actress from Baby Reindeer who plays Martha. Oh, incredible performance.

Oh, incredible performance. However, she's in a bit of a pickle at the moment. Jessica Gunning, she's the actress that played Martha in Baby Reindeer. Now, did she get a nomination for that for, was it Emmys? Surely, right? Didn't they announce all that kind of maybe a month or two ago, the Emmys? Yeah, I think they got a whole lot, didn't they? Yeah.

Oh, surely. Because that was just an incredible performance. Surely. Especially when, like, that was followed up with real life Martha on Piers Morgan. And everyone was like, okay, wow, she nailed that. And them coming out saying like, oh, she's nothing like the real life Martha. And boy, oh boy, you couldn't have cast it better. 11 nominations for Baby Reindeer at the Emmys, including casting, directing.

Yes. Editing. Yeah. She got one. and he got one. And the guy that played the producer got one. Right. Okay. Yeah.

So they've got a lot. Anyway, so you'd think based on how popular that show was, it was like number one around the world for a while and then was number two for even longer than that. Even boosted Netflix's earnings. Yeah. Like a subscriber base. Yeah, and she's Emmy nominated

and everyone can agree that that performance was incredible. And then like again, everyone was looking at it after they did, P.S. Morgan did the real thing. So she was asked in a podcast interview, like how are things going?

Like this must have blown your career apart. And she said, well, Richard's got a lot of incredible meetings. So the guy who created it and placed the lead. And everyone said to her, like, what have you got? And she said, well, I have had two offers. One was about sharks called in celebrity infested waters where celebrities swim with sharks. Okay.

And the other was an Australian touring production of Peter Pan. Are you kidding me? To play Mr. Smee. She's got big Smee energy. Yeah. She said, so yeah, the offers are flooding in. You would think she would be getting some massive movie roles. I've heard this before, though.

Yeah. That the character's so disgusting that people can't see her as something else. Yeah, but she did it too well. She gets typecast. Yeah. But like, typecast is a creepy woman. But you think people normally that are typecast, they do the same roles in the same movies over and over again.

She literally has done one series. Well, she's in The Outlaws, which is Stephen Merchant's show. Yes. And she's been in that for a few years. Okay. But, like, that wasn't a huge show, so it didn't, like, you know. Has she been in that since the start? I think so. That's interesting. Yeah, because

that's, like, up towards fourth season, and I don't know anyone that's watched it. No. I haven't seen it. I watched the first couple of episodes and I was like, I don't think this is for me. Yeah, to be honest, I don't think Stephen Merchant makes great stuff. Wow. Wow. Good Yeah, to be honest, I don't think Stephen Merchant makes great stuff. Wow. Good morning, Stephen Merchant, if you're listening. That was a far too harsh review.

And in fact, if you were to make something and put me in it, it would be an honour. That just came out and I didn't mean it. I didn't mean it. But anyway, yeah, she was like, oh my God. I mean, this happens. I think people have an idea that you do one successful thing and suddenly,

people after Golden Boy, when I did two seasons of Golden Boy, I mean, people just thought I was off to Hollywood and it just didn't happen. And it just, and now you're here. Somehow I'm here.

Here you are. Somehow you're here. Somehow I'm here. Yeah, right. I mean. You're not enjoying it. Incredible performance for me. Yeah, right.

But here you are. I mean, it was just crazy. Sometimes dreams don't come true. Sometimes. I've said it, I said it last week and I'll And then it was just crazy. Sometimes dreams don't come true. Sometimes. I've said it last week and I'll say it again this week. Sometimes your dreams don't come true.

And that's okay. Isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it? I'm happy to be here with you guys. Thank you. Would I rather be in Hollywood

in a film? The answer's yes. Next. Breasts. Next to breasts next and why everyone's getting their implants removed. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

It's just waking us back up. Now, it's a beautiful song and in the movie it goes well. It's just, you know, come on, Billy. Pep it up a bit. How am I supposed to break dance to that? Now, there is a huge rise globally of women getting their breast plants. Breast plants? Little flowers.

The plants that grow on the breast. Breast implants removed. It's called explant. Breast explant. Right. Where they go in and they'll remove them. And it's for a number of reasons. One, people are getting older and the decisions they made when they're in their 20s,

they're just like, I don't really want these anymore. And you know breast implants come with upkeep. You've got to replace them. Do you? I know that. Every like 10 years. What? Is it like veneers? Because don't you have to replace veneers every 10? Replace veneers. If I spent that amount of money on my teeth, I'd just drink pudding

I think for the rest of my life. And have like big retainers at night. Yeah. Let's make these last 20 because that was painful. But yeah, a lot of women going like when I hit in my mid 30s, early 40s and they're having babies and stuff and when you breastfeed with implants afterwards, you still have the impact that breastfeeding does to breasts, which is like

loosen the skin and then you've got these like hard things in there. It changes the look of them. Also, even if without breastfeeding, they're just like, man, I was like 20 and I really want a big bird. I can't be bothered. And also the upkeep. Because if you got them when you were 20, then you got to get them again at 30 and then

40. I'd just be like, get them out. I just had no idea they needed to be replaced. Yeah, you can't just get them forever. They like expire basically be replaced. Yeah, you can't just get them forever. They like expire, basically. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure there's some, because there's different types.

I'm sure there's some that last longer than others. But no, you've got to get them replaced. And so people are just like, but can you, once you've taken them out, can you just go back to, you're just getting another kind of surgery? You're just getting another surgery. I'm sure you'd get a little bit of a lift, right? Because you're downsizing. I don't know.

I don't know about the process of how they look afterwards. And then another reason is this thing called breast implant illness. And I remember following a chick that had this and she was having reactions for 10 years and acne and eczema and allergies she'd never had. And then was researching into this breast implant illness, which by the way, there's no like official medical diagnosis for this,

but it's just something that people are like, I guess because it's still relatively new, are going, it's actually not good for your immune system to have them in there. Well, it's just something inside your body that... And your body sort of fights it a little bit and might have all these things.

And so a lot of people are getting them to go... There's like fatigue, brain fog, dry eyes, joint pain, skin issues, eczema, acne, like these side effects that people are kind of putting to having these implants in their body. How strong is the plastic bag it's in? Plastic bag's the wrong word, but... Real strong, but sometimes they rupture.

Yeah. I'm just reading here, because I googled what's in breast implants now. There's two, right? Cohesive silicon gel inside a shell made of medical silicon. So the gel, if it ruptures, will stick to itself and remain in place. But occasionally, saline, a sterile salt water will be in there.

Breast implant. The idea of it like bursting inside of you. I know. Yeah, it makes me feel a little bit sick. Yeah. I mean, I don't think I know many people with breast implants. I've never felt any. I'd quite like to do that before I die.

My friend got hers because of cancer. And then so she was chuffed with them afterwards. She got little itty bitties. I think she got little Bs. Right. Because she was like, just because I've got cancer doesn't mean I'm going to come out with some big honking. Some big Ds.

Yeah. So she just got some little itty bitty titties. And I had a little squeeze of those. I feel quite good. Okay. I couldn just got some little itty bitty titties. And I had a little squeeze of those. I feel quite good. Okay. She just, like, I couldn't imagine Vaughn getting breasts and being like, feel these. I don't know if I'd be comfortable doing that with my friend. I don't know.

I think it was all just a novelty. My big tits are hairy. Might be a little bit put off too. Yeah, that could be a turn off. Slightly less appealing. It would just be so odd. Imagine you, Fletch, getting breast implants, but you've kept your tiny little nipples.

So you've got these big, juicy boobies now. Would they? Tiny, tiny nips. If I ever get breasts, you reckon get the nips as well, the areoli. I don't know if you could. You'd have to get them tattooed. Extended.

With a tattoo. And keep your original nub in the middle. As the middle bit. Yeah, as the peak. Because your whole nipple is almost just like a peak. Yeah. You need to get the tattooed disc. But if you did get the nub it'd be good because I don't know how else I'll get

to feel something. Oh, if it's not your best mate. Yeah. Yeah, right. I'd do that for you, man. Thanks, man. I'd do that for you, man. Thanks, man.

Yeah, man, you can feel my breast implants, man. 20 past six. Forget the per capita medal table, guys, because New Zealand has finished the Olympic Games. We don't even need it. At its highest place, and we are beating some pretty, pretty big countries. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hailey.

The 2024 Quatre Nils Ancient Greek Sporting and Athletics Competition. Well, the closing ceremony kicks off New Zealand time at 7am. Very soon. Finishing up at quarter past nine this morning. Who would... Snoop Dogg's performing right? Is he? I think this must be part of his half a million dollars a day pay

deal. Hey, that's fun though. He bloody better. We have finished. This is the best Olympics for the New Zealand team for New Zealand ever. Because I couldn't believe it over the weekend. Gold, gold, gold, gold. We just kept going.

And we always cling to the per capita table. Who cares? We're always proud that we punch above our weight. But New Zealand will finish, and we have finished, because from what I can see, all the events are done. We've finished 11th. In the world! In the world!

And we're teeny. It's in order of, it's not total medals. It's in order of gold medals. So United States and Jaina tied on 40. But because I think because the United States won 126 medals, China won 91. They were on top in the first position. Japan at three.

Australia four, which is incredible. 18 golds. 53 medals from Australia. France at fifth, the Netherlands, Great Britain, Korea, Italy, good Korea, and Germany at 10, New Zealand 11. 10 medals, 10 gold medals,

seven silver, three bronze. Amazing. 20 medals in total. Do you know what I loved watching? Who was it? It was Lydia Koh. Oh my God. Watching her tear up on the podium. Beautiful who was it? It was Lydia Ko. Oh, my God. Watching her tear up on the podium. Beautiful. And then that's her last Olympics.

Yeah, Hamish Kerr, who I loved watching because... I didn't think we were a high-jumping country. Oh, he's always been amazing, but him, he was just having fun. Like, I loved watching him, and he would get the crowd going, and then he'd have this little smile on his face as he was, like, leading up to his run. I was like, how awesome is that? It's cute. Damien McKenzie does it every time he converts to the All Blacks, and then he'd have this little smile on his face as he was leading up to his run. I was like, how awesome is that? And it's cute. Damien McKenzie does it every time he converts to the All Blacks,

and it's creepy. Yeah, it is creepy. And then Elyse Andrews won the track cycling individual sprint. And then overnight there's been two more? Two more. Yeah. I'm just looking at Lisa Carrington, who over the weekend cleaned it. So in the history of the Summer Olympics,

we've won 14 gold medals in rowing. She's won eight of them. Yeah, watching her was incredible. I want to say as well, just looking at the medal table, Canada are 12th. They're below us. Suck it. Their population, 38.93 million people.

You know, let's watch Canada at the Winter Olympics. And then they're slightly more skewed to the Winter Olympics. But, like, we're ahead of huge countries. Hungary, Spain, Brazil. Yeah, we're amazing. Like a lot of the European countries. It's insane. Yeah, pretty good stuff.

And I did nothing at all. Yeah, but I'm proud. And I'll claim it. It's insane. Yeah, pretty good stuff. And I did nothing at all. Yeah, but I'm proud. Yeah, I'll claim it. I'm proud. How embarrassing for South Africa. They're 44th. Wait, so Lisa Carrington added three medals. Okay, so South Africa won six medals,

one gold, three silver, and two bronze. But let's not forget that while South Africa is in parts a wealthy country it's still a very much developing country yeah but like really sporty though like good at rugby and cricket

yeah I just would have thought they would have been like quite higher gosh what else who else Argentina

50 I mean we lost to them the weekend in the rugby but they are 52nd on the medal table one gold one silver one bronze like Lisa Carrington won more medals than Argentina oh yeah in the rugby, but they are 52nd on the medal table. One gold, one silver,

one bronze. Like Lisa Carrington won more medals than Argentina. Oh yeah, she's incredible. But let's talk about the real story

from the Olympics over the weekend. Australian breakdancer Ray Gunn. Far out. Which to me, Olympics highlight because it seems like

afterwards, have you seen she's already done like a video with the Inspired Unemployed? Yeah. You know, the two dudes from Australia? Yeah. Dancing on the streets of Paris.

Now, she did it. She was like, there's no way I'm going to win. She got zero points, walks away. The whole world is just like gasp and then laughs for two days straight. With the claws? And she's like, ah, well. I mean, you kind of have to Embrace it

You have to 100% Because you are She's done it the right way She's been like Yeah You guys saw it too Imagine doing it

I did read an article Where she was Having to be consoled And she was in tears Yeah she was I mean you would But she's Well everyone's laughing

But Did you see the Australian Dude breakdancer Yeah incredible Yeah see that's what I thought breakdancing was That's what I sort of I sort of feel Well, everyone's laughing. Did you see the Australian dude breakdancer? Yeah, incredible. Yeah, see, that's what I thought breakdancing was. That's what I sort of thought. Hey, Wendy, that's what the breakdancing was. Better balance this out a bit.

Yeah. She's going to be memes for years to come. Oh, your God, yeah. When she was, like, gyrating on the floor, it was amazing. So that's another thing that I read from the Olympics, is how big it's been on social media. They worked out 757 million likes on TikTok.

Yeah, I've been loving the socials. All the games content that people have made. Loving the socials. Very much. Well, yeah, proud of our New Zealand team.

Oh, very proud. The best Olympics ever for New Zealand. Our personal congratulations to everyone. Or everyone who for New Zealand. Our personal congratulations to everyone. Or everyone who represented New Zealand. I watched Eliza McCartney.

She didn't place right. Nah. She was incredible. I couldn't pole vault. I certainly couldn't pole vault. I couldn't do anything that anyone is doing in the Olympics.

I wouldn't trust the pole. I wouldn't trust the pole as far as I could throw it. No, no, no. You see how much it bends? You see it? It's a joke. That's got to limit that pole, eh?

Does it know how much I weigh? That's got to limit. The pole's got to limit, right? Oh, it's got to have a limit, and I reckon I'm over it. Play ZM's Fletchford and Ailey. Play ZM. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah.

This is the top six. One person won $44 million at the weekend. Imagine that. Unbelievable. Yeah, imagine. Imagine that. Stop it. You didn't win.

Imagine that. Stop wasting your time. I'm here out of goodwill. You would definitely not be here if you had $44 million. I would have got a little cold I would have stayed in bed I would have done my goodwill later in the day You reckon?

Yeah, if I won $44 million I'm charitable to a fault But I would have had a sleep in this morning Oh 100% Wow, we didn't win So I've got the top 6 things you don't need money for This applies to everybody Great

Number 6 on the list Hugs You don't need money for hugs But drugs Yes, you will need money for this applies to everybody. Great. Great. Number six on the list, hugs. You don't need money for hugs. But drugs, yes, you will need money. Yeah. So that's why hugs are better than drugs. Hugs, not drugs.

Hugs, not drugs. Yeah. Just purely from a financial standpoint. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not judging. And drugs are bad. And health standpoint as well. Yeah, yeah, but I'm saying it's long. Yeah, health and safety.

Long it's been the health standpoint for hugs, not drugs. But financially also beneficial. Now it's hugs, not drugs. But financially also beneficial. Now it's hugs, not drugs. Should we have a hug? The three of us. I had a hug on Friday. It was enough. Did you?

Who'd you have a hug on Friday? Oh, Dr. Shawnee wanted a hug because I hadn't seen him for six weeks. Yeah. And I was like, you get six seconds, Max. You hadn't seen him for six weeks? Yeah. Well, he's been away. He's been away.

I was away. You were away. He was away. Yeah. Well, we're going away this weekend. Yeah. I'll get lots of hugs. And lots of lip kisses.

Also free. Well, you've got a cold, so I don't think you should be lip kissing. No, it's going to be gone by then. I've told you, we're different, Vaughn. Yeah. This will be gone tomorrow.

Right, mine linger. Yeah. You shed the virus, don't you, real quick? I shed the virus. I'm shedding it with you right now. I don't want the virus. Oh, tough.

I don't want it. Because if someone's on the Auckland motorway or the North Western motorway when you're going to Bond Street, can you get a photo of that homemade anti-vax sign? Because apparently the chicken flu vaccine is going to be the second of the third, second of three lethal vaccines. Oh, wow.

God, some people are cocked, eh? Yeah. And I don't know whose sheet you wrote all over, but someone's mum's going to be pissed off that you wrote in their white sheet. What was the thread count? Good sheet. It looked like a high-quality Egyptian cotton. Oh, no. And I don't know whose sheet you wrote all over But that's someone's mum's going to be pissed off That you wrote in their white sheet What was the thread count? Good sheet

It looked like a high quality Egyptian cotton Oh no It looked scratchy Oh really? It looked scratchy sheet If someone could get a photo though Send it to my Instagram Or anybody of our Instagrams

F-E-H-C-T-M I just need to know the actual wording of that Instead of the Number five on the list of the top six things That you don't need money for Good friends Yeah Good friends you don't need money for. Good friends. Yeah.

Good friends you don't need money for. She's expensive though. Yeah, I am. You always got to go to cocktail bars. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I live quite far away so Ubers are expensive to hang out with me at my house. Or you could bike if you wanted to.

$20. Good bit of cardio. $20 cocktails and I have at least a few of those. Yeah. Well, she's not on your good friends list then. She's expensive friends list.

Aww. Number four on the list of the top six things you don't need money for are going to the hospital. Health system got you. But the prescriptions after, yes, you will need money

unless you head up Chemist Warehouse, but they'll always get you because you go for something and you walk out with a basket full of stuff. I love that place. Yeah. Yeah. Have you thought about popping on on the way home because you go for something and you walk out with a basket full of stuff. I love that place. Yeah.

Have you thought about pumping on on the way home because you've got a cold and getting vitamin C? You can get the new... I'm getting Virolex. You can get the David Seymour cold and flu now. Pseudo-ephedrine. Pseudo-ephedrine. Pseudo-ephedrine.

Hey! I haven't had a cold since Pseudo's been back. Yeah. Itudo-epidream. Hey, pseudo-epidream. I haven't had a cold since pseudo's been back. Yeah. It has to be a bad cold to get to. This is not it. This is like during the day, this will work itself out, and then at night it will return. It's one of those.

Yeah. No, no, I'm going to get some Viralax, which I swear by, and you're always like, no, but my colds last two days and yours last two weeks. Dirt capsules. Yeah, dirt capsules. Dirt capsules is a bit sick. They're not dirt capsules.

They've got herbs in them. They do nothing to me. They're the tips of an olive leaf. Give me a bloody break. They've never let me down. This is a guy that wore half bloody nasal spray for 13 weeks and then wonder why his septum's burnt through. His buddy Stevie Nicks over there.

Yeah, the doctor's like, oh my God, how much cocaine do you use? And I'm like, nothing, sir. I use an nasal spray. Sure, we've heard that one, sir. No, I swear. No, I didn't even have the fun times associated to drug use, sir. Nope. Number three on the list of the top six things you don't need money for, air.

Last time I checked, that was free. Yep, and your tires and to breathe. Wow, that's double. Double free air. And your checked, that was free. Yep. And your tires and to breathe. Wow, that's double. Double free air. And your balloons, that's triple. And if you just do a jump, that's getting some air too. That's getting some air. Okay, good, yeah.

Or if you pop outside from a stinky room, you're just getting some air. Getting some air. Free. Free. This free list of this thing, this list of free things is socks. Yeah, dude, being poor sucks. What about like, couldn't you steal some from that birthday book? What was that free things to get for Kiwi kids?

Yeah, that really was. What was that? Do you remember that book? Someone literally published, the sheer audacity to publish this and sell it for money, a book called Free Stuff for Kiwi Kids. And you'd open it up and it would be like, hey, do you like information on hydroelectric dams?

Here are three addresses you can write to and you'll get some mail back because they are a government business. They have to send you the information you require. Oh my God, I so recognise this. The poor people that worked at those hydro dams or wherever had to send out information about penguins or hydro dams. 1988. 1988. Yeah.

That would have been it. And it was published a lot. I remember the cover. Free stuff for Kiwi kids. And there was a special birthday section. And you'd write to them and tell them what day your birthday was. And then on that date, they'd send you something. It was wild.

Free stuff, small, in the post for Kiwi kids. Lots of free things to write away for or get through the internet, including games, posters, and fun activities. I don't have any games. Maybe I could have posted, but it would have been for a hydroelectric dam. Is it still a thing? Yeah, there's a website called Wow Freebies for New Zealand. Freebies for New Zealand.

And it's like... Also, here's the other thing. You don't want to raise a child that is constantly on the hunt for free Zealand. And it's like... Also, here's the other thing. You don't want to raise a child that is constantly on the hunt for freebies. No. Yeah, right. It's like you turn into a scrounging adult. We don't want scroungers.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, you're saying this book has created... I was literally just about to say, you're raising the sort of person who listens to the radio and hears, hey, we're the Black Thunders and we've got some Lemsip. Well, that's all we like.

Come on, we love people that we love giving away stuff. Actually, if Black Thunders had Lemsip today, it would be helpful. You'd have a Lemsip. I'd be like, I'm going to go find the Black Thunders. I need to get some blue beakers out of here for the next 10 to 15 minutes. I'm going to go and pass on this cold to someone earning with them a wage to drive a big stupid Toyota around a packed central city. Can I get a couple

of them please? Can I have one for my kid too? It was Sade's favourite part about being a Red Bull girl. Oh yeah. Telling people they

couldn't give their toddler a Red Bull. Can I grab one for my kids as well? No. Sorry you're six week old. Yeah yeah no

your child shouldn't be drinking Red Bulls my dude. My king. No. Number two on the list of the top six things that you don't need money for. A smile. Oh, my God, this list sucks.

This list straight up sucks. Hey, hey, hey. Here's one. When you do it with your teeth, it's off. It's a lot of teeth. It's a lot of teeth. Soften your face. Warm your face up a bit.

Oh, number one on the list of the top six things you don't need money for. Your next lottery ticket. On the proviso that you won bonus lines on Saturday like we all did, except bonus lines don't include the Powerball, so you'll never win the big one. Yeah. This is what we learned. Yeah.

Just recently. Yeah. The bonus lines don't include a Powerball. I won $30. So I'm happy. That is the best upset. Times are tight for everyone.

Right? And particularly if you like to shop you may have to be reining that in. Now I understand why this article

has been sent to me. Thank you. Message received. Here's the hack. Well, it's not really a hack. It's just a tip. Is it a hack to save? It's a hack to save.

It's aimed particularly at people who really like to shop for that dopamine hit. Impulsively. That's me. I like a little dopamine in my day. What was that study? Was there a study last week that said, like, you get 200 minutes of a high after buying something online? I do have four tabs open of things I'm thinking of purchasing. Okay, so if you're someone like me who, like, sees things,

you get that little thirst and then you buy it and then you get a dopamine hit, and that's not supporting your saving goals. Here's how you do it. Or your renovation budget. Yeah. Budget in quotes. So you take your notes app

on your phone. Now if you've got a Samsung you can stop listening to ZM. How do you think that's half of people? No I'm kidding. It's fine. It's just embarrassing for them.

So you get a notes app and on the notes app you can make a table. Samsung also has a notes app. All the Android apps. can make a table. Samsung also has a notes app. They probably had one first. I love Samsung through and through. So much so you don't say that probably. Samsung, I'd say it's almost

more correct than I love everything other than their phones. It's confusing to me. Anyway, so you make a table. Three columns. You put down the left column, the item that you've seen that you really like. You do this once a month. The item you've seen that you...

This just seems more of an Excel, a spreadsheet thing than a notes. Do you know what? I would hoon this in an Excel spreadsheet. But we're old. Do you know what I mean? So you put the item you like, shoes, lip gloss, expensive things, a handbag, a dress, this thing.

Then you put the date that you saw it on in the middle column and on the right column you put the amount, right? And you are not allowed to buy it until the end of the month. But you know you can say to yourself, if you do this for a few times, I know I'm going to get a few of these treats. So you get there and at the end of the month, on the 31st or the 30th or the

28th if it's February or 29th every leap year, you get there and you go through the list and you add up the absolute total of everything you would have impulse bought. So say at the end of one month it's like $700 worth of impulse buying. Then the

trick is that you cut that in half and you put half into your savings and what's left you're able to buy. Or you put all of it into savings and realise how much of a problem. You be, you be, you be into savings. Put your face into savings. Or you put all of it.

Put your face in half and put half into savings. You can put all of it into savings and realise you've got a big problem. Listen, this is for shoppers. So you're basically, mostly you go half of it's going into savings. So say it's $700, you've got $350 in savings that you weren't going to have. And you're also halving the amount of crap that you were going to impulse buy. And then you go through the list and actually think, okay, what are the things that I still even am interested in?

What do I really actually need? Yeah, like what are the things, because if it's lasted a month, it's probably something that is actually going to add value to your life rather than something that in the moment you really wanted, but now you realise you don't need it. And then you still get yourself a little treat. So you're knowing as you're making this little list, I still get a few little treaties.

I just don't get all the treaties. And then you're visually saying all the treaties that you've passed on. Yeah. You give yourself a pat on the back and reward yourself for the treaty. And then they say the pat on the back and the fact that you're putting $350 into savings that you wouldn't have before, that's your little dopamine hit already answered. So then you're even going to limit

going, I probably don't need most of this stuff. But at least half of it's gone into savings. It's actually quite smart. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Okay, there is a list of 20 I guess habits or things that you do called boomerisms. Now, are these going to be things our parents do or that we also do?

I think it's a mixed bag. Oh, okay. So if you do most of these, you're a boomer. Yeah, or you're boomer-esque. So this is Daily Telegraph, which is the UK, via NZ Herald. And they asked a bunch of under 30s what they consider signs of boomerism. Here is some of them.

I won't say them all. Texting with one finger. Oh yeah, that's a classic. That's so boomer. Phone in one hand, tap, tap, tap in the other. My parents do that. And holding the phone so far away because you're short-sighted.

Yeah. Or near-sighted. Am I? You're near-sighted. Yeah. Or near-sighted. Am I? You're near-sighted. You're near-sighted, yeah. No. No. You're long-sighted. Yep. So you've got to hold it at arm's length. What's a boomer? I don't think my parents are boomers, eh?

63, 64. I think it's less about the actual generation of baby boomers now and it's more of a mindset. Because definitely my dad texts with one hand. 60 plus. 60 to 69. Nice. Okay.

Okay, trying to pay for parking with coins. So we all got apps now. Or you just tap your card on most of them. Owning a checkbook's on this list, but I don't know a single person who has that. A checkbook. They're gone in New Zealand now. They're totally gone. Yeah, I think so.

Using Facebook. We were actually literally having a conversation before about how it's just so shit. My feed is full of things from 13 days ago. Yeah. You're like, no. I only use it for Messenger and like groups. Yeah.

So there was also a study supporting that saying only 17% of British people say they love Facebook and only 3% of those are Gen Z because they're just like it's the dumbest thing. I just keep it for like groups and chats and a few like promotional things.

Okay I'll skip that one since it's boring. Printing tickets and boarding passes for planes. Now I did this when I went overseas it's just like an old habit that my mum was you're always going to have a little file

you know just in case your phone dies or whatever yeah yeah you print yeah I'm all for it

it's boomer it's a boomerism especially if you like if you're travelling internationally you're not going to have wifi or data at an airport

I just literally read the end of the sentence if you're storing all of these documents in a plastic wallet, by the way, there's no helping you. That's me. Is a plastic wallet like a clear file? No, like those sleeves. Oh, yes, yes, yes. The travel agent's sleeves.

What's that? Flight centre on the outside. Sending or expecting to receive thank you cards after birthdays or Christmas. I don't do that. No. No. Not wearing sunscreen is a boomerism

because like we know now that that's the worst thing for your skin. Absolutely. And I mean, we live in New Zealand. I think we're a little bit better. Yeah.

Opening a car window is one. So they say a real boomerism and we do this all the time, Vaughn, is passing someone you know cranking down the window, hey, hey, and have them shout out the window. Everyone does that, don't they? Yeah. It's fun.

Yeah. So rolling down is old. I love this, turning the internet off when you go away. God, my parents used to do that. Yeah. You've got to save it. You're like, but it's endless now. Yeah, there's no data cap.

Well, they turn TVs off at the wall because of the red light. Yeah. Things always get turned off at the wall. Oh, everything's off at the wall. You've got to save money on power and whatnot. You're like, I think that red light's not taking up a lot, man. No. Texting in general, like texting using the text function on your phone.

Yeah. Messages. I switch. I've got some people I engage with strictly on WhatsApp, some on Messenger, some on Instagram, and some on text. It's all over the place. Yeah, I'm scattered. Having ringtones or keyboard clicks

or your camera noise on. Chicky. Or tick, tick, tick. Like someone that's under 30 with keyboard noises or clicks on. I'm like, what are you doing? Also, they say just ringtones in general. Like even if you've got your phone on, it should never ring.

It should just vibrate. Be on silent. Yeah, they're like, that's so embarrassing when your phone rings with a tone. I suppose I have mine on every now and then. Most of the time my phone's on silent. Yeah. Somewhere where you're not going to feel the vibrate or hear it, though, crank that up.

Yeah. That's the good thing about having a watch connected to your phone. It vibrates your wrist. Yeah. When caring about the QR code restaurant things, this is me. You know where we go for breakfast sometimes. I complain. I'm like, where's the service?

Where's the face-to-face service? We're going to meet a nice smiley face. How hard is it to come and take my order? I like a QR code. Yeah, I hate it. It's so impersonal. Don't quit. Okay, being bad, it's taking selfies is one.

Having a landline phone. Aaron's parents have that, but not mine. Turning your phone landscape to take a picture. Being able to find something to watch on TV without planning. So like going on and being like, I know what I'm watching, my show. Keeping a paper diary, which I've just started. I wrote about you boys over the weekend, by the way. Did you? In your journal? What did you say about us? That's not the purpose of the journal.

Because if you tell us, it won't come true. No, it's not a wish machine. It's not a birthday wish. It's like blowing out a candle. Right. Okay, the last two, and these are my parents for sure, holding onto paperwork for years just in case. Yep. And the last one is taking photos with

an iPad. An iPad. Big boomer move. Big boomerisms. Great list. I'm surprised on the list wasn't making big purchases on a big computer. Yes. You will never buy a television on a phone. Or you would never buy a big computer. Yes. You will never buy a television on a phone. Or you would never buy a big overseas airfare on a phone.

Oh, God, no, no, no. You've got to get the computer out for that. You've got to get the big computer out for that. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Silly little poe. Silly little poe. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little poe.

Silly little poe. Silly little Pole, do you still live at home with your parents? Yep. So, yeah, some parents were surveyed and 85% were like, absolutely we would love our adult children back living with us. I thought it would have been like half that. Yeah. They worry about them. Times are tough. They're adults.

Yeah. Actually, I think I joked that my parents would be stoked, but they live their own life. I just think that they'd be a bit like... Perhaps a bit of generational guilt there. That their generation... Has shut the younger generations

out of the housing. Yeah, housing. shut the younger generations out of the housing. Yeah, we did this. Environmental factors. Maybe. Et cetera. Yeah. Everything got privatised. You know, all that.

Well, maybe that's why. But we asked, do you still live at home with your parents? 90% of people said no. Okay. That's a huge amount. Small, cold children. Yeah. 10% said yes. And this wasn't saying that 85% of people said no. Okay. That's a huge amount. Small, cold children.

Yeah. 10% said yes. And this wasn't saying that 85% of people live at home. No. It's just that parents that many have been coming home. Yeah. Yeah. Kat says, this is the only way I can afford to buy a house.

Mm-hmm. So living with the parents. Yeah, a lot of people do that. Just go stay with mum and dad. Maybe for like a year or two, eh? Yeah. Yeah, while they save. Or five years or 10 years given current house prices. Or like, a year or two. Yeah. Yeah. Well, they save. Or five years

or 10 years given current house prices. Or like, why would I buy a house? Yeah. Actually now, I just stay there until they die

and then have their house. Push mum down the stairs. Get them out of the house. You get them out of the house. Get them in a village. Now your house is me cut, sir. That's my house.

Yeah. My house. Really implant some thoughts in their heads about how bad your siblings are and how they don't care about them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you know what Sam said about you, mum. Yeah. My house. Really implant some thoughts in their heads about how bad your siblings are and how they don't care about them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Do you know what Sam said about you, Mum? Yeah, and then he hates you. Should we change the will now while he's not here? Yeah. Yeah. He was like, the only reason I'm nice to Mum is so that I get money when she dies, which I hope is soon. We'll get that photoshopped up.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're like, look what he's saying, Mum. Yeah, look. He just texted me. Look. Look, yeah. Great. We'll get Shannon onto this. I mean saying, mum. Yeah, look. He just texted me. Look. Look, yeah. Great. We'll get Shannon onto this.

I mean, we'd joke about that, but some people actually do this. For sure. You could just change my name in your phone to Sam Sproul, and then I'll message Drew. You're like, how's mum? Is that still alive? Where's my money? Where's my money?

Where's my money? Great. Steph says, I don't, but that's because I live in a different country. If I lived in Brisbane, I would 100% live with them. I'm just a single gal in my early 30s trying to pay rent all by myself, and shit's expensive. My two cats, Audrey and Joseph, are refusing to work. Audrey and Joseph.

And someone's got to pay the bills. Jolly mate's not cheap these days. Jolly mate. And I bet mum and dad in Brisbane have a pool. Mum and dad would have a pool. They would. For sure. Yeah, but not...

Mum wants to get rid of it because snakes keep coming out of the bush. We do just go South Africa for a bit. Into the bush. Where's the snakes? Get out of the bush. Get the snakes in the pool. Geordie says, I'm 26 and with a baby and my partner. I'm 26 with a baby and my partner and I live at home with my parents.

They love it though. Yeah. Really? A baby? That's the thing. You bring a baby into the house. They've kind of done their baby. Yeah.

They've done their baby duties. You can go and visit with the baby But not 24-7 baby I think my mum Would love 24-7 baby Instead she gets No 7 baby Danielle said I moved out a year ago

At age 25 Saved with mum To buy my own house Bought my own house In November last year Oh awesome That's how it's done daddy Liv have been living

In Ireland Did you just say That's how it's done daddy That was weird No that's how it's done Danny daddy. Liv have been living in Ireland. Did you just say that's how it's done, daddy? No, that's how it's done, Danny. Oh, I heard daddy. That's how it's done, daddy. Actually, can we just get that clipped up? Vaughan saying that's how it's done, daddy.

That's how it's done, Danny. Liv, I've been living in Ireland for a month now and oh, okay, I was just like, she's messaging me. Did you fly there on your lingus? I've been living in Ireland for a month now. And, oh, okay. I was just like, she's messaging me. Did you fly there on your Lingus? I have been. Oh, careful.

I've been living in Ireland for a month now and been on a few dates. Absolutely shocked that it's completely normal to be 30 and still live at home by choice, not because you're saving for a house yourself. Oh, going home with people. No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. No, no. Yes. Have you no, no. No, no. Have you ever?

Have you ever? Has anyone ever? Yes. I have once. In the caravan. No, no, no. When I went to someone's house and I thought it was their

flat in the morning, their mum knocked on the door and asked if she was coming to church. That's right. That's right. That's one of my favourite stories. And so you went to church.

And so, jobless, the boy got up. I hid. I hid. And she passed on church. Oh, God. Pholess, the boy got up. I hid. You hid under the... I hid. And she passed on church. Oh God. Phoebe, just moved back yesterday.

Already loving this cheap rent. Yeah. I know that's the thing. Mum would probably do the washing. Chuck that just because you just chuck it on the floor. You just chuck it in when she's putting hers up.

Yeah. Annalise says, no, but they did buy my house so I would leave their house and built my brother's house On the same section Two kids

One patch of land That's pretty awesome That's cool One patch of land Man if you could do it Why wouldn't you You'd want to be a fence Bart

Built the brother's house Brother got a new house She didn't Oh she just got the old house On the land I'm just saying I'd be like Why does he get a new house

Why does he get a fresh one Yeah Why does he get the fresh one Why Why does he get the fresh one? Why is his half of the chocolate bar bigger? Yeah. His slice of the cake is bigger. Yeah. Exactly.

He's got a new build and I'm in a leaky old villa that I've got to fix up. Wow. I've got condensation as a flat matter over her. Yeah. That's a little poem. Wow. People will do it. Intriguing.

Play ZM's Fletch Vornriguing. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Ailey. Play ZM. Do you think that I have an energy of, like, better than you today? Or, like, holier than thou? Well, you're a bit sick. I am a bit sick. And do you know what? I need a little pick-me-up this morning.

And this is almost a first for me. I never do this. And I was always encouraged by sexologist Morgan Penn to do so. She said it really changes your day. It really makes your day go well. Matching undies. Match your bra to your undies, wear a set, and make sure the undies

aren't, you know, ginormous. She's very anti-granny panty, which is my preferred undie of choice. And so today I've got, I think today would be a great day to be hit by a bus. Because I've got matching undies on. Right, this is why. So you'd be

on the table and they'd be like quickly cut off the dress, which would be mortified because this is like one of my favourite dresses ever. Yeah. So I'd be like, you're paying for that. Yeah. That's a New Zealand designer. But you're dead. They don't you'd be, oh. Oh, I think maybe like unconscious. They think we're trying to bring me back to life. Okay, right.

Let's just say. Yeah, I don't think if you're dead, they'll cut your clothes off. Shall I ask my friend who is a paramedic if he's ever thought, oh, well, that's nice that she's wearing matching brown. Can you ask? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Somebody was telling us that they cut off the jeans,

really expensive jeans. And the person woke up and their first thing was like, oh, no, my jeans. It's like, you're lucky to be alive, you. Yeah, yeah. Dirtbag. You douche. Yeah.

Well, yeah, they'd cut off the dress, which I'd be mortified by. Livid. Livid. And I'd be seeking reimbursement. But then they'd be like, well, hello. Far out. Look at her. Wow.

Where was she off to afterwards? Yeah. You know what I mean? She's got some matchings. She's got some matchings. They're red too. Look, she's really, I'm out here looking for a. Oh, a racy red.

I've got a racy red. It's a racy red bra strap. Now I sort of feel like if I don't get hit by a bus today. It's going to be a waste. What a waste. What a waste. Maybe I could put them through a quick wash tonight and just keep wearing them. Every, or maybe get more pair of matching.

This is my only matching set. See, I think I would, if I was female, always wear matching. No, you wouldn't. But then, yeah. Yeah, see, always wear matching. No, you wouldn't. But then, yeah. Yeah, see, I'd say. No, you wouldn't. No, but see, even like when I'm at the gym and I see people wearing like an Adidas top and a Nike pants. You're like, shame.

Or Nike socks and they're wearing like Adidas shoes. That's always me. No, no, no, no, no, it doesn't match. Oh my God, I never wear matching gym gear. I just wear whatever top and whatever pants. That doesn't matter. Yeah. I know it doesn't matter, but it's like.

I thought you were going to say they've got like those, the same brand, but they're wearing different colours. I was thinking if you're matching, if you're wearing a green, an olive Lorna Jane up top, you want to be wearing some olive Lorna Jane downstairs. Oh, no, I don't bother. I'll wear a bloody purple Kmart number and then a Lululemon on the bottom

and then a Nike sock and then a different shoe. But would you say most females don't wear, this would actually be a great little poll. Do you wear matching sets? At some stage. No, because you've got to get your comfortable daily undies and they often don't come with a matching bra. And you don't have that many bras on rotation

because they're expensive. Oh, what's the ratio to bra to undies? This is like shampoo, conditioner, the can. The conditioner always runs out first. I would have like five bras and like 20 pairs of undies. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But today I get it.

I feel superior. I also feel hot. It's given you confidence. It's given me an energy. Okay. This could be the new me. I could always be ready. When do you think it wears off wearing matching bra and underwear like well the undies are uncomfortable as all hell yeah yeah like they look great that's they're

gonna look great on the operating table yeah but for a day-to-day function i'm not feeling it right i long to return to my ginormous high-waistedisted briefs. Beige. So it's a no from you. Yeah. And then my comfy bra that I talk endlessly about, that if anyone saw, I'd be mortified. Also beige. Also beige. So technically that's matching.

No, but they're not a set. Totally different brands. Totally different shades of beige. 22 minutes away from eight. Next on the show. I saw a post on the Reddit. The Reddit. The Reddit.

The Reddit. This is on the web. You can go on there and see there's a whole lot of people talking about a whole lot of stuff. Somebody asked the question on there, and I thought, what a fascinating question to put to our audience. Wow. He's always on. Yeah. I was what a fascinating question to put to our audience. Wow. He's always on. Yeah. I was just looking

for an easy thing to submit to be part of the show. I can't wear matching panties. He's all filler. All filler. No killer. Now, somewhere on the worldwide web last night, I saw a question posed by a New Zealander.

That's right. We can now, in New Zealand, get on the internet. And we can ask our questions to the world. And someone said, how many leave days do you guys have owing? They're like, I feel like I should have more. I've got six leave days owing. Right.

I thought if I'd just been asked a guess, I would have had a month owing. And lots of people were like, well, you need to look into that. Well, and it depends. Like, you've got to work at a job for a certain amount of time. Time before you start crying and everything.

And then one of the people who responded said, I've got like six weeks owing. And they're starting to hound me about taking time off. Because like a lot of places won't let you accumulate big amounts because it goes on their totals. It goes on as debt, right? Well, not debt, but they have to...

They have to have that money on hand. To give to you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So that got me thinking, let's try to find someone with heaps of leave days. Yes. Because I've got one day and I just applied for it.

If you're self-employed, you don't get any. And when you're self-employed and you don't work, nobody pays you. What? Welcome to my life before I met you guys. Before you had a proper job. Before I had a real job. Christmas? Not that fun.

Not fun? Oh, God, no. It's just a day you're not getting paid. It's every... Because they have to pay you for Christmas. Well, that's why a lot of, like, gig workers, like, you know, the Uber drivers and stuff all over the world are battling for like

some kind of status, some kind of like employee status that's not contractor. Yeah, for sure. Because then they can get sick days and, you know, pay different insurances. Sounds like communism to me. And you know, I'm terrified of communism. I don't know why I am.

I just think I should be. Because of American media. So I want to know how I am. I just think I should be because of American media. So I want to know how many days you've got owing. And you can tally up if your company rolls over sick days

and you've just never used your sick days, chuck them on the pile too. Hell yeah, they're there to be used. Because everybody knows someone at work that just never goes on holiday.

I mean, I'm not that person. Oh, I was pointing to you. You never take your sick leave. I've never. I don't really have sick days. Yeah. You and I, we're bloody workhorses. I'll probably take. Old smithy

will go down for a whole week. I'll take every three. I'm two for a week, so no. Yeah, I'll probably take like three. But some people just bank them up, bank them up, and their work lets them. And some people like can have months. On holiday being paid. Yeah, I remember a friend once was like, I've got three months worth of leave bank them up. And their work lets them. And some people can have months. On holiday, being paid. Yeah, I remember a friend once was like, I've got three months worth of leave banked up.

Oh, my God. What? Stunning. Take me to Europe and pay for me to be there. Exactly. And I'll come back guilt free. How amazing. Oh, my God.

The messages are already rolling in. Okay, well, this is what we want to know. Some insane amounts. Okay, give us one. I work for my brother, and I have 12 weeks annual leave. If I decided he was going to leave, I would bankrupt him. Yeah, you would. You're going to start taking some time off.

Yeah, you'd absolutely take him out. Do your sick days accumulate as well? No, it depends. That's a company to company thing. So many people are coming in with accumulated sick days accumulate as well? No, it depends. That's a company to company thing. So many people are coming in with accumulated sick days. Someone's got 346 sick days. Well, I mean, that's great if something actually like- Really went wrong?

Really went wrong. Or you had a surgery and a recovery time. That's great. You could take a year off. You literally could pay. I had a mole removed. I need to use my sick leave. How much?

All of it. I'd be recovering from a flu for like weeks overseas. They'd call up, you'd be like, how are you? You'd be like, well, you're still sniffy. We want to take your calls. Give us a call. 0800 DALS at M. Text through as you are 9696.

Oh my God, this is incredible. How many annual leave or sick days or combined do you have? Oh, you missed the button, did you? No, I was waiting for you to say more. Yeah, do you have... I don't want to say any more. So how many... Just give it a bit of a...

At the end. Yeah, you really... We're asking the question, how many days off and sick leave do you have banked up? Like... I wish I was some of these people, man. I would be holidaying. Somebody said you just made me check I've got

negative six. Now what happens if I leave? Do I have to pay them back for six days of work? I think you just ignore all the phone calls and just run away and leave. Hayley joins us. Hayley, how many annual days off do you have and sick leave banked up?

Oh, they do hours and hours. That's 251, which is about six and a quarter weeks. Oh, yeah, that's nice. That's a decent Europe. That's good. Yeah, that's a decent trip. That's holidays. And then, yeah, and sick days is 89.

Oh, no, sick hours. Sick hours. Oh, yeah, because ours is hours as well, and you've got to. Oh, no, sick hours. Sick hours. Oh, yeah, because where your hours is hours as well, and you've got to divide it by whatever that is. That's it. And so what? They don't make you just take your leave? They just let you bank them up?

Yeah, because I'll get more stressed having time off, coming back to work, like workload. So that's what we've heard from quite a few people, is that when they go to take a long period of time off, their work's like, we can't afford to have you away that long. So how much, I hope they're financially coming to the party then when they have their pay negotiations, and they're like, actually, you know, there's 100 people who would love your job.

Hayley, thank you. Some messages. And a lot of teachers. Teachers. Our sick leave rolls over. I've got 127 sick days owing. What? 126?

127 sick days. That's four months, man. I work for a government agency. I have 98 days annual leave owing and 346 sick days owing. I'd be sick in Bali. They've never taken a sick day in their entire career and they've been working forever. Imagine if I could have rolled over my sick days. I'd be sick in Bali. They've never taken a sick day in their entire career and they've been working forever. Imagine if I could have rolled over my sick days.

I know, ours don't, just they refresh again. My partner has owed 138 days annual leave. Oh my God. Crazy. I want to. Someone said I get six weeks annual leave a year, but we're not allowed to accumulate it. You have to use it.

And if you get to the end of the year, it just disappears. Yep. I'd be taking them all. Take it, take it. Take it, go, run, run. And then some. Even if you just sat at home for six weeks or, you know, did something around the... You did a little reno or a refresher. You can't cash out sick days, eh?

No, no. Annual leave you can cash out if you leave a job and you're owed heaps. You can be like, I'm here for the annual leave. But sick days you can't. My dad was a teacher for the same school for 43 plus year teaching career. He had 280 accumulated sick days when he left. I mean, use them or lose them basically.

Yeah. You can take sick days for mental health reasons too. I would have faked an illness and just gone to Bali for a whole year. 100%. My mum is so profoundly unwell slash being rubbed by a beautiful Balinese woman. My mum is a nurse

and she has 80 sick days, not hours, 80 days. She's a nurse. See I would have thought with a nurse you just get in face with every sickness that comes your way. You burn through your sick days. Keep your texts coming in 9696 0800 Darls at M. How many leave days do you have banked up? We want to know how many leave days you have saved up

and how many sick days. Man, some people just never go away. They never leave their job. I know. Well, then there's cases. A midwife's messaged in. I've got so many days on because whenever I apply to take time off,

there's not enough of us. So they say you can't take that much time off. What, so you can never book a holiday? Because they're like, cancel that. Well, unless you're like, I need four time off. There's not enough of us. So they say you can't take that much time off. What? So you can never book a holiday because they're like, cancel that. Well, unless you're like, I need four weeks off. For well knowing you,

I'm only going to take two weeks off. And they're like, we can't approve four weeks. We're going to do two. And you'd be like, okay. I don't know.

That's weird. I know. So many teachers. So many teachers. Because apparently once you're a teacher and you start getting sick days you can leave

and come back to teaching and the sick days are still there waiting for you oh you hold on to them forever yeah somebody said it's quite common practice

for teachers to like retire but still be getting paid because they just cash out all their sick days oh just like I'm gonna be sick

for I don't know eight months ever more and then you've just gotta Relieve a teacher for eight months Yeah That's your teacher For the whole time

Mmm Um I'm an early childhood Education teacher We get eight days a year Cause they're private Aren't they? Yeah

And no rollovers for sick days That's nowhere near enough Oh my god yeah Hey None you legally You've gotta have four Ten How many sick days? It's ten now Oh ten Oh you're talking sick days Sick you legally, you've got to have four. Ten. How many sick days?

It's ten now. Oh, ten? Oh, you're talking sick days. I thought you were talking about annual leave. Annual leave. No, no, yeah, they'll have the standard four weeks. But yeah, it's not enough. Eight sick days.

And also then early childhood education, right? Don't they just be like, oh, we're shutting for two weeks over summer and that's two weeks of your annual leave? We were joking about if you were in minus sick days, minus annual leave days. Somebody is, they messaged in, they leave their job next week, they're minus six annual sick days, they have to pay them back for those days. Now, are we...

What? That's so bizarre. How does that work? Could you offer to work for the company for free for six days? Or would that not be allowed because you're working for free? And that would be against the law, right? Is it a bit messy? Yeah. Technically you're working to pay off a debt. That's like saying

yeah, I don't know. What do you bank transfer your boss? Like it's sort of weird. Money back to the company. Yeah. I can't imagine getting like NZ Me's bank account and me being like here's a hundred dollars or whatever. It's sort of weird. My doctor wife. My doctor weird. My doctor wife.

My doctor wife. My doctor wife. My brackets doctor, close brackets wife, has 19 weeks owing but gets declined when she requests time off because of how short staff the health industry is. Oh, God. My husband can sell his leave. What? He had four weeks leave So he sold someone a week

Another employee I guess so Oh fantastic I'll buy I'll buy But are you buying at their Like pay rate Oh

No no no I want to buy Or is there a I want cheaper Can you be like I'll give you a hundred bucks But get paid your full wage How much have you got

I've got a week Oh yeah I'll give you $100. But get paid your full wage. How much have you got? I've got a week. Oh yeah, I'll give you $200 for that. No. Give me $200. I'll give it to you right now. I want $200 and more within the company.

That's a weird one. Yeah. You'd be saying that in court. But that sounds like a court case wouldn't happen to be totally honest with you. So we're off to New Plymouth this weekend for my show by the way you can still get tickets

go on my Instagram the link's in the bio if you want to come and see me and also Fletch is there as a little bonus we'll trot him out on stage I don't know if that's a bonus I don't know

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I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know. No, that's definitely not happening. Well, I might need you to do that. Anyway, you were mentioning that maybe you were looking at doing a hike. Well, I was thinking we might do a little sunrise. Vaughan and I, we've been up the pool, guys. Beautiful hike. Beautiful.

You know the famous photo with the lake? Yeah. It's a tarn, you absolute moron. Well, a tarn is a mountain lake, Vaughan. Yeah. But not every tarn's a lake, but not every lake's a tarn, you absolute moron. Well, a tarn is a mountain lake, Vaughn. Yeah. But not every tarn's a lake, but not every lake's a tarn. You're going to get no pudding if you keep fighting, you boys. Well, I was like, we can do a little sunrise hike. You get your head torched.

You leave at like 4.30. You get up there and you watch the sunrise. It's beautiful. Because I love doing that on a Saturday, getting up at my radio hours. Yeah. But the weather forecast is horrible. Is it lame? It's lame, it's raining, it's wet, it's cold, it's probably

cancelled. We'll just drink then, sleep in. Yeah. So, anyway, I was like, because I've not been focusing on my fitness for the last couple of years, until just recently. And so I was like, God, we would have put it to the test. And Aaron suggested that we went on a little hike in the Waitakere Ranges,

which I've actually never done, which is a crime. Beautiful trail. We're just dark. Cascade Cody, which has been closed for the last six years, but it got reopened in January because of Cody Dieback. And I was so impressed. All the gates with the rub your boots and spritz the stuff. And I was like, go us.

Well, go the Department of Conservation. Anyway, so we went in there and we'd been recommended this track. And of course, we didn't look up anything or any path or, you know, we didn't have a little look at how long or whatever. And we had friends over for dinner last night. Hey, I had to roast a chook. I had to roast a chook. So we were like, why don't we just go for an hour?

We'll walk for 30 minutes. We'll just turn around and we'll get a vibe. We'll just get a vibe on where we're at. So I was like, fine. And went into the bushwalk fully prepared. Yeah. Went in and there was like the down track and there was one called the upper track.

And we were like, let's do the upper. Because it's not downhill and you don't have to walk back up it. No more because I was we were like, let's do the upper. Because it's not downhill and you don't have to walk back up it. No, more because I was like, it seemed more challenging in the moment. And it was, man. Like, you know the first five minutes of a hike where you're like,

I've made a terrible mistake. Or you're just like, oh no, if this continues, I shall never make it. But then we kind of got into it and it was fine. And then, in the words of Robert Frost, there were two paths diverging a wood. Two roads, two paths. And now, in the words of Robert Frost, there were two paths diverging the wood.

Two roads, two paths. And now, I'm talking about poetry, and you guys didn't go to private school. I'm so sorry. You've lost me. There were two tracks. I know who Robert Frost was. Frost versus Nixon.

Quite smart. No, different. Different Frost. Different Frost. Multiple Frosts. I know Robert Frost's son, Frosty Boy. He always has delicious frozen treats. Always. Yeah. Now you do know him. He always has delicious frozen treats.

Always. Yeah. Now there was two, it split into two. Yep. At this juncture. Right. And were there signs? Yeah, there were signs.

Okay. One sign pointed to a dam. Yeah. You can carry on to the dam. A lot of people were heading towards the dam. And then one was heading up to, they called it Long Road. And then one was heading up to they called it Long Road and then one was turn around, do a ui and back to the car park. And we

were sort of like, oh we've gone longer than we expected, we could turn around. But then we saw a guy and we ended up naming him the Red Man. Do you do that thing where you're hiking and you're like, afternoon, morning, hello. Constantly. And there were a few people that ignored me.

Yeah. Some people ignore. It is a stunning Sunday morning in the Waitakere Ranges. How lucky are we? Cheer up, Charlie. Give us a smile, toots. I felt that saying. Anyway, the red man came past.

He becomes the villain of the story because we say to him, hey, if we go up that way, up to Long Road will it loop us back towards the car park? And he was like yeah yeah it does. If you just keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going, eventually it loops you back to the car park. That is true though. If you literally point in any direction and just keep going long enough

you'll end up where you started. Now you might circumnavigate the earth, it might take you 150 years but it would. All roads lead to Rome, yeah. In the meantime, this other guy who had been- She's speaking poetry again. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

My private school's showing. Please keep a public school for us. Yeah, more Frosty Boy over there. More Frosty Boy. So this other guy who we returned to him later, he kind of met us at this junction and heard the guy say that as well. And so he went up this long road and then we were like,

where should we go? Where should we go? Dilly dally. We're like, right, we're in the mood. We're going to keep going. We're feeling good. You know, we're into the fitness of it. Then, so we keep walking up this road,

keep walking up this road, keep walking up this road. And all the sort of the directions we were going did not make me feel like we were leading back to the car park. And then we come out at a gate and start heading down a normal road, like a road in which cars would be on. And I was like, man, like, what is this? And then I look ahead and there's the guy that's passed us

who's also followed the red man's advice. And he just throws up his hands at us like this. And we walk towards him and he's on his phone. And he's like, there's no way in hell this leads back to the car park. And we were like, what do you mean? And he pulled out, he had the All Trails app, which we didn't have. And he was like, we are so far to the car park. And we were like, what do you mean? And he pulled out, he had the All Trails app,

which we didn't have, and he was like, we are so far from the car park, it's not funny. And I was like, oh, what did we do? The car did you wrong. It did you dirty. The red man did us so dirty. Why didn't you check your phone? In the bush?

Yeah. Because I listened to the red man. But when I was like, does this lead back to the car park, I would have had the phone out and just mapped my way back. When you were walking up the gravel road, was there a giant water pipe next to you? No. No.

Because you know that one, eh? And then you go up that road and then it goes back to the car park. You're in a completely different part of the Waitakere Ranges. Oh, okay, right, right. You're in the Tatarangi end. Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's more mid-ranges at this stage. Yes, I was. Okay. So we get to the Tatarangi end. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's more mid-rangers at this stage. Yes, I was.

Okay. So we get to the end of this road, and then we're faced with two options. Head Google Maps. Give up entirely. Give up and die there. We had a banana. Ration your banana sensibly.

And our new friend, who, by the way, was a six-foot-four bedded tall man. That's cute. I liked her. He said, well, at least if we get stuck, that this lady's being supported by two Vikings. And I said, this is about to turn into something I would Google. Something you would listen to on an audio book. Yeah, perhaps.

Anyway, lovely guy. His name's Jonah. And we made friends with him. He shared a biki with us. We had a nana. We had a little sit down. What kind of biscuit? It was those really sweet Anzac biscuits,

but not homemade with a chocolate squiggle across it. Yeah, real. Oaty. Sounds pretty good. Phenom. Just what the doctor ordered. Anyway, so we had two choices. I will say, you were fighting for your survival at this stage.

Anything probably would have tasted delicious. Yeah, but that was amazing. So then we were like, okay, we either go completely backtrack, go back up the gravel road, back down the thing to the junction, and we know that. We know that that's the way to go. Or he had Google Maps that it would take

exactly the same amount of time, which is at this point an hour and a half. So you set off to do an hour walk. One hour there and back. So 30 minutes in, 30 minutes out. At this point, we're at the two hour mark. And it's an hour and a half walk back to the car park. And so we decide to go along the main road.

So we have to like walk down and then get out onto the main road where cars, there's no footpath. Cars are like hooning past us. And we had to walk for an hour and a half back to this car park, like past a golf club, past this, past this completely lost. I wondered why last night I got a notification on my Apple Watch that Hayley had set a new movement record

Yeah, I burned so many calories, it ended up being a 13 kilometre walk that took three hours and we were so late. All I could think about was the roast chuck and how to go buy it and get it out

and all that kind of stuff. But yeah, the red man. And we kept saying that if we pass the red man, I'm going to punch him in his face. You give him a piece of your mind. I'll listen to the red man. Yeah. And there was another woman who he also gave the same advice to

and at one point I looked across and she was like traversing farmland. And I felt like yelling out to this woman. Do you think that guy's doing it on purpose? Why would he say that? That road and that was the only way it led

was not to the car park, was to this other wayward way. I think he was screwing with our day. God, if only he had a device that would hold a map on it. I did have a device, the red man. And I followed his advice. No. And it led me astray.

Don't listen to a red man. No. Someone you can listen to is a doctor. Smooth segue. Would have been smoother if you hadn't have pointed it out. I like to point out my smooth segues. You spend a lot of time in a waiting room. I spent a few hours at the doctor's over the weekend

and I've got some issues. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Where we can add a broken little finger to the list of injuries my daughter sustained in her life. Again? And a very accident prone. We were going through sort of a trip to the A&E

and an x-ray every six months for a while there. Do you get a free one on your 12th visit? I was wondering if there was some sort of coffee card they could clip and we'd get a freebie. No, but it's ACC, which is a good little system we've got going here in Aotearoa. Yeah, it is good. I sat behind someone in the waiting room

and the kid was asking the dad a million questions. And one of them was, what does ACC stand for? And the dad said, accident something something. Accidental compensation cookies. Accident compensation

preparation. I know that cookies is in there somewhere. The accidental cookie crumble. Yeah. And then the kid said, something doesn't start with a C,, Dad Which I actually thought Was some perfect timing And like Great comedy chops On this little fella

Burn Yeah So we were there And we didn't actually Wait for too long Which is great Because generally The waiting time's

Insane On the weekend Yeah Yuck But one thing I noticed a couple of things One That really frustrated me

When the doctor walks into the waiting room, I feel the minute the doctor appears in that door, regardless, if you only just arrived, you stand and applaud. You stand and applaud. When you see him, and you should always be watching that door, even if out of the corner of your eye,

listen for what the name is that he's saying. This guy, this doctor comes into the room and he's like, Samuel, loud. There wasn't that many people. The room was pretty quiet. Samuel for a second time. Yeah. And I'm like, where's the Samuel character?

Yeah. See, to me, he should be going to the next name. Samuel's had enough of that. Samuel's had two. How many should Samuel get? I think we just go. And then Connor was like, oh, me? Are you Samuel? Enough of that. Samuel's had two. How many should Samuel get? I think we just go four. And then Connor was like, oh, me?

Are you Samuel? And then I was like, is Samuel? And he's like, yeah, I'm Samuel. And he's like, yeah. He might have had a head knock, though. He hadn't. He hadn't. He was holding his arm. I think he had a sore arm.

So he's like literally in pain. Ouch, my name's Samuel. Ouch, ouch. All you'd be doing is waiting for the doctor. My name's Samuel. Samuel. Could be anybody. Yeah. Surely it doesn't mean me's Samuel. Ouch, ouch. All you'd be doing is waiting for the doctor. My name's Samuel. Samuel. Could be anybody. Yeah.

Surely he doesn't mean me, Samuel. There's so many Samuels. Surely he doesn't in this room of six people. Surely he can't mean me. He must be referring to a different Samuel. What a wild coincidence. Should I be the Samuel that he's calling for? Me, Samuel?

Yeah. Oh. So then he's like, after four of them, he's like, me. And the doctor's like, Samuel, is that your name? And he's like, yeah. And he's like, okay, you can come with me now. And I was like, Samuel. Like, listen, listen.

The minute he appears at that door, I'm like, oh, who's he after now? Hopefully me. Oh, could be me. Could be me. And then Samuel comes out and he's waiting, which indicates to me he's going through to the x-ray people. Yep. X-ray guy comes to the door. I'm like, $1,000 says he's after Samuel.

Because the doctor said, go back there. I know this process because in about 20 minutes, I was going to go through it myself. You go back into the waiting room and then the x-ray technician, the radiologist will come and get you. That's how it works, Samuel. That's how it works. So I'm thinking Samuel's going to be ready for this one.

X-ray guy. What's he called? Not a paleontologist. Radiologist. The dinosaur guy comes out. He comes out. He's got a piece of paper. I'd actually love to meet a paleontologist radiologist.

Well, they could X-ray their own fossils and bones, couldn't they? Oh, my God, they could. Pretty safe. That's two jewels for the price of one. Yeah. This guy comes to the door. Good luck getting a T-Rex to stay steady for 20 seconds. Oh my God, I know.

Stop moving. And getting his little arm flat on the table. Oh my God, his little with an arm. And I'm just going to rotate your little arm and rotate it back.

Can we get your other fingers out or is it just the two? I'm going to put the arm aside that didn't go to your right hand and actually mum dinosaur you're going to put on the lead vest.

But this guy came out. He wasn't raw dogging it. The doctor came out and raw dogged it. Samuel, he said. I've just looked at my computer. This guy came out. Announcement. He had a piece of data.

He might as well have been like, hear ye, hear ye. I shall now be X-raying Samuel. You should have a bell. Please tell me he didn't. And I'm like, I know who Samuel is at this stage. So I look at Samuel, who's just kind of like airy-fairy, just looking into the ether. Maybe he's on some serious painkillers or something.

No excuse. And then the town crier again announces for the second time, hear ye, hear ye, ding, ding, ding, by order of the king, Samuel. And he goes, me? Oh, Samuel. You're expecting him? Oh, my God. You're expecting him?

He's expecting you? You've just sat down? He needs to be careful. The T-Rex could eat him. Yeah, I know. There's a T-Rex in the waiting room. So Samuel's been ushered twice into the X-ray and then he comes

and that's the last I see of him. Technically next time I hope it would have only been one because he's following the mathematical pattern and went four calls, two calls, that's halved. Halve the two again, maybe just a one. Fingers crossed. Here's the other thing. I was sitting there and somebody walked in and he went straight

to the reception and he's like i've got a question which i was like what a wild thing to approach the reception not like hello how are you good morning i've got a question is covid still happening because my son here and ash is indicates his son right beside him. No mask on. Of course not. Why would he? My son's got all the signs, but he's already had it. Oh, no, honey. How do you have kids? Honey. And not be aware that this is a reoccurring. Hats off to like all of our medical professionals

and nurses and reception staff that deal with these people. Patients of a saint. And then we went into the doctor's office, the same doctor that had called for Samuel, and I would estimate that that office was the same doctor that had called for Samuel, and I would estimate that that office was about 1,000 degrees Celsius. Oh, no, I would have left. I felt faint.

It was so hot. This guy was working in some tropical conditions. I can't handle it. We keep the studio at 20, and I'm like, it's too hot. He's got to be cool. Cool. And he said on the way out, is there anything else? I said, I'd drop this a couple of degrees. Did you?

Can't tell another man. 100%. I'd drop this a couple of degrees. Did you? Can't tell another man. 100%. I'd drop this a couple of degrees. That's hot. Like I was clambering out of my t-shirt. How did he take that? He laughed. It's awful in here, dude.

It's a stinking greenhouse in here, my king. Are you growing ferns? Wait, so finger broken? Finger broken. Oh, mate. Splint on. How embarrassing. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaugh broken? Finger broken. Oh, mate. Splint on. Yeah, how embarrassing. Yeah.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. It's not Paralympics this week When does it start? 28th Huh So stay tuned Or do they do a little clean God burn the beds

Burn the beds? Yeah Burn the beds Keep the bird baths Keep the bird baths Don't burn the beds Burn the bedding. Burn the bedding.

I've got this headache behind my eye. Oh yeah, that's probably a tumour. Bedding's not a tumour. It's a tumour. It's not a tumour. Okay, I'm changing my fact of the day. Okay. Because this week's theme... So Paralympics you're going to do...

No, because you said headache, well I said headache and then you said the tumour and then I was like, okay, so that'll do it I reckon. Well do you have a theme for the week? No, because you said headache. I said headache and then you said the tumour and then I was like, okay, so that'll do it, I reckon. Well, do you have a theme for the week? Yeah, I do. It is,

the theme is things not everybody gets. Like in life? Or privilege or jokes? No, no, no. It's things that you assume everybody would experience but they don't.

I get it. 5% of the world's population will never, ever have a headache. Oh, wow. Ever. Ever. What about after a nasty gym beam hangover? Oh, yeah, and like with cheap, like cheap Coke.

So I was thinking it would be contributed to by multiple factors. This was done by Advil, which is an American painkiller. Like Panadol. Yeah. No, isn't Advil like Disprin? Oh, as in aspirin. Advil is paracetamol. Oh, okay.

It's paracetamol. He knows his drugs. This guy knows his drugs. This guy knows his American drugs. What do you do? Okay. Do you want a little bit of time to Google what that is? I just want to get your facts right for fact of the day.

I'll play the mouth trombone while we wait. I reckon don't, eh? I don't know. I reckon it's all good. It's bringing up lots of stuff. Advil. It's one of them. So I think it boils down to the fact that some people don't get hangovers

and we know these people and they're monsters. Yeah. They just don't get hangovers. I've got one. Yeah, I've got a friend. That just doesn't get hangover. Too much oxygen in the blood. They have don't get... I've got one. Yeah, I've got a friend. It just doesn't get hung over. Too much oxygen in the blood. He had really high oxygen levels in his blood.

Right. Never. Doesn't get hung over. Tired. Tired. Very tired. But no hangover. So maybe no headache.

No headache. No sickness. 5% of the population is a small percent of the population. And if you don't have headaches, you probably don't realise that you don't have headaches. It's people who have chronic headaches. When they don't have one, they're like, hooray, no headache today. Yeah. So if you take into account the people who don't get headaches, you probably don't realise that you don't have headaches. It's people who have chronic headaches when they don't have one, they're like, hooray, no headache today. So if you take into account

the people who don't get hung over, which already narrows it down significantly, and then people who have the other factors, like too much oxygen in the blood, they don't get headaches. Advil's ibuprofen, you dum-dum. Oh, is that idiot? God, he's thick.

Carry on, please. He's a dum. He's a dum-dum. Dum. They estimate that, yeah, from their estimations and their study, and they'd know because they're a ibuprofen. Not an aspirin. Like you said, or a paracetamol like he said.

Both times. You're telling me too because you said paracetamol like he said. Both times. You're telling me too, because you said paracetamol. No, you said aspirin. You said aspirin, and that's wrong. Yeah, but I was taking a stab. Oh man, what a couple of idiots. He was like, it's all this.

I'm pretty much a doctor at this stage. I'm the show's doctor. Do you have any medical advice? You're not the show doctor. Surrounded by a couple of dum-dums. I'm the show doctor. Do you guys need any medical advice? You're not the show doctor. I'm not the show doctor. Yeah, from their calculations, 5% of people will never need Advil. It was in their marketing campaign for,

you definitely need Advil in your cupboard unless you're a 5% of the population, but you're not. Oh, okay. Just one experience a headache. It's wild, isn't it? Yeah. I've never had a migraine. Oh, once.

I don't think I've experienced a migraine. I've had a bad headache, but I've never had a migraine. Oh, once. I don't think I've experienced a migraine. I've had a bad headache, but I've never had like the shut the curtains, can't move. And then there are some people that just constantly get them that live with headaches. Yeah, my mum does it with those big fat migraine pills and you take them. What you've just indicated is a squash ball. A squash ball. They're huge. Like a giant Jaffa.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What is it? They're big Jaffas. What's in it? It'ssized tap, like a giant Jaffa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What is it? Big Jaffas. What's in it? It's a pill, like migraine pills, and you've got to take them the moment you feel that switch between your eyes. Oh, really? Yeah, and it will crush it.

I come from a long line of migraine sufferers. You're not supposed to take them that often, though, because I think they burn through your guts. Okay. But you'd rather a burnt guts than a migraine. Yeah. Not really. I'd rather neither if that's pretty.

No, if it's on the table. Pretty pleasing option. So today's fact, he says, like this, because it's probably just, I mean, I'm promoting Advil and I'm not getting a trip to Fiji like doctors do. Yeah. If they write you, if you get a prescription pad and it's got a name on it, they've definitely been to a tropical island on that drug company, right? Well, if Advil's listening, I'm more than happy to take it.

And my family don't even need to come at this stage. I'd happily holiday without them. Right, okay, but you're not a doctor, so. I'm the show doctor. You're the show doctor but you didn't get a PhD.

I'm the show doctor. Remember, you two both jumped to conclusions of what Advil was and were dead wrong. Don't categorise me with him. Yeah, yeah, okay, aspirin. Paracetamol, ibuprofen,

same thing. It's so far from the same thing. It's all good for the tum. So, it's not. Don't quote me on that. I am the show doctor after all. You're doing a terrible job of it. 5% of the world's population will never experience a headache.

Fact of the day, now, what is banned, what topics are banned at your family get-togethers? Yes. In the interest of peace and harmony. Like, surely with Christmas, every Christmas there's like, you know what you don't want to bring up with certain family members. 100%. But I also think there's the obvious topics.

And then I think there would be little family things, maybe a little family story or a history or a family member that we don't talk about. Oh, yeah, yeah. We don't talk about Bruno. We don't talk about Bruno. We don't tease family members about a certain thing that happened. Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't talk to Hayley about the thing, right?

Because, you know, she'll just flip her lid and we don't want to deal with that. The reason we're talking about this is because there was a TikTok where the siblings actually have a pre-family gathering gathering in which they all kind of commit to the things they will not talk about. Like, we're not going to bring up the LGBTQI plus community. We're not going to bring up the current presidential election. This is American, yeah.

This is American. We're not going to bring up da-da-da-da. Yep. And the funny thing is they then go inside the house to this, like, family gathering. They come back and they're like, mum broke the rule straight away. Politics.

Politics. She brought up Trump. God. No, it sounds like mum's more like, that Kamala Harris is no good. I don't like her. Yeah. Anyway, so that's what we want to know is,

what are the off the table topics at your family gathering? And maybe the reason for it. Like, is it a sore point with someone? There's history or it's blown up. Maybe you don't bring up auntie's fifth husband or the fact that she's had five husbands. Yeah. Because it's a sore spot.

Because, you know, it's her life. Maybe there's something that Gran reacts to every time, so you just know not to say it. Yeah. Yeah. I was going to say something, but it's one thing my grandfather said, and he was a very open minded fella

but boy oh boy he described some actors interestingly. They do. Okay give us a call 0800 dials at air we want you to call us now you can text through

9696. What topic is banned at your family gathering? What is banned at family get togethers topic wise? Yeah. Wow so many messages and calls coming through.

Some of them are juicy, too. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Topics banned from family gatherings. It's best we don't speak about my nephew and his toxic girlfriend. It always ends up in an argument. Mum still protects my nephew, despite the awful things him and his girlfriend have done to our family.

They aren't invited to any gathering anymore because of their behaviour, but we're not allowed to mention them. Oh, God. When we get together with my husband's family, we can never talk about religion. He was in a newfangled religion when I met him. A newfangled? Newfangled.

When I am newfangled religions. And now he's not. We can never mention it because I'll lose my mind at their crazy beliefs. We're in our 40s and 50s now and still have to watch what we say. Oh, wow. Anna, what's banned

from family gatherings? What topic? We're not allowed to talk about COVID and being vaccinated or unvaccinated. Oh. Is there a bit of a splat?

Very, very touchy subject. Yeah, I mean, it certainly has been for the last few years, hasn't it? Yeah. All the disinformation. Yeah, we're like, half of our family the last few years, hasn't it? Yeah. With all the disinformation.

Yeah, we're like half of our family is vaccinated and half of our family isn't. So, yeah, we've definitely got two sides of the whole situation. Hannah's giving me big vaxxed energy. No, I'm vaxxed. I'm feeling unvaxxed through the phone lines. Oh, you're unvaxxed. Yeah. Oh, interesting.

Yeah, yeah. It'll be a hot topic. And they still haven't had COVID. Really? I know. I was reading about an article about people that haven't had it. The Novids. The Novids. Yeah.

And some... Must be special. They reckon there is something... Yeah, something about them. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe it's the genes. We're going to send you to a lab. We're going to send the government agents around to dissect you.

No, no, no. Don't do that. No, no, no. We are. Sorry, Anna. We are. Let's drink her blood. Beep. No, no, no, don't do that. No, no. We are. Sorry, Anna. We are. Let's drink a blunt. 5G tracking enabled.

It's too late. You're on the 5G network. No, we're not living like Charlie guys. Sorry. No, we put a tracker in through the phone. Dissection imminent. Thank you. That's ruined her week.

Yeah. Talking about my uncle On my mum's side Is a no-no And talking about my auntie On my dad's side Is a no-no Let's just say They did something bad

Oh What? Like what? Together? I don't know if it was together What sounds like Anonymous What's banned from family gatherings?

What topic? Oh hi So we do not discuss anything LGBTQIA related. Okay. What about just a little bit of L's and a little bit of G's? I mean, it's just safer not to. What about that Graham Norton?

He's a lovely gay man. I know, right? He makes us laugh on the evening on the deli. And you know I like that Alan Carr. Yeah, absolutely. So it's mostly like myself and my cousins and my sibling are all sort of in our 30s and very

loud, proud allies. And then our uncles and aunties and parents aren't necessarily. So it's just a lot safer to sort of just not discuss it. Can we take it back to the old days where everyone just hated immigrants? Yeah. I know. And you get comments like, there was none of that not discuss it. Can't we take it back to the old days where everyone just hated immigrants? Yeah. I know, and you get comments like,

there was none of that in my day. There was. If Grandad's no longer with us, I'll tell you why. He was after some shenanigans. I know. Yeah, well. It's just not worth it.

Sometimes it is safer just to sort of not. Yeah. Anonymous, thank you. Why aren't you allowed to discuss your family and get together? Is that what we... It's so good. We aren't allowed to discuss

mental health issues. Apparently my son, who was diagnosed by a medical professional ADHD, doesn't have it because it didn't exist in their day. Right. Depression,

what have you got to be sad about? And anxiety, get a grip and take a concrete pill. Oh, that's some old thinking, isn't it? What have you got to be worried about? Yeah. Jesus. Those are the old boys that were dropping dead of strokes

and heart attacks in their 50s. Yeah, because they were so anxious. Just keep pushing it down. Just keep pushing it down. We don't talk about my brother-in-law's special ankle bracelet. It's beautiful. We've got a bar. I simply don't know why he's got the ankle bracelet.

That's so funny. Somebody else said, we don't talk about the fact that my cousin was in jail for 12 years, only got out two years ago, and most of the family don't know why, only a select few. Oh, I would not have that secret in my family. I would demand to know. Same.

Couldn't you Google it? Yeah, of course you could. You would go to trial. Name suppression? Name them. I've got name suppression. Wow. Surely.

With my in-laws, it's literally like walking on eggshells we discuss the weather. But also not climate change. I was going to say no because the weather is one of those topics now that Oh climate, oh fine. You're telling me you're not enjoying these longer days? We had floods in the 80s.

Yeah, one. Two floods, one at the start one at the end. Anything, a lot of LGBTQI yeah yeah yeah A on the end there now I mean as you say

a lot of families maybe they think they've got it all covered with the L and the G part of that I remember my friend dated men her whole entire life

and then she started dating a woman and they ended up dating for like eight years or something. And the first thing her mum said like, oh, pick one, you're so selfish. Because I'm bisexual. Oh, for God's sake.

It's always great when parents understand their children. You're so selfish. You just pick one. The problem is most people maybe have met a G or an L. Or an L. But they maybe met a B. Maybe a B. But maybe the B kept it quiet. But not a Q. They haven't met a T. They haven't met a T. an L. Or an L. But they maybe met a B. Maybe a B. But maybe the B kept it quiet.

But not a Q. They haven't met a T. Oh, what is that? They haven't met a T. They haven't met an I. They haven't met an A. They meet these people. They're like, oh, that bloody homo you walked around last week wasn't too bad.

Like, this is. That's wild, eh? They meet them and they're like, that's just like you and me. Yeah. Wow. Who would have thought? Who would have thought? Who would have thunk it?

Who would have thunk it? Who would have thunk? We don't talk about my cousin's husband, soon to be ex-husband, who's got a woman on the other side of the world pregnant. Yeah, we'll probably just leave that. Anything AI related is off the table. That opens a can of worms and there's the next five days gone

and everyone leaves not talking to each other anymore. It is an interesting debate, isn't it? Don't you dare talk to my mother about how much time she spends on the phone. Messages somebody in because she does not like when she gets her screen report she thinks it's wrong. Oh as if.

Oh show me where. No way. This is nonsense. Real estate. There's five of us in real estate across three different companies and brands. And it's absolute chaos if we start talking about it. Someone said, we don't talk about... My auntie thinks that COVID and the Ukraine war is all fake.

Her and her husband think the people suffering on TV, both as a result of the war or COVID, are actors. Oh, for God's sake. Oh, my God. I would love to take someone that stupid and just helicopter them into the front lines on the Ukraine. See, I told you. It's awful.

Great work, guys. 10 out of 10 if I say so myself. I'll do a 9.6. Is that enough for you to review this podcast with a high rating and then tell all your friends? You sound very insincere. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.