ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 12th June 2026

Episode Date: June 11, 2026

00.00: Intro 02.50: Masterton's poop situation 06.20: Top 6 - Recipes for leaves 12.10: Kmart dino 17.15: SLP - Stick or drag vacuum? 22.30: Hayley's new game 29.40: Shannon's unpredictable history 35.10: Where did you get your first period? 47.50: Follow up on saying goodbye at a wedding 49.20: When did you unfollow someone? 58.55: Fact of the day 1.03.10: Hayley's Tiktok issue 1.07.30: Raye's protest against new music 1.08.50: How useless was the new person at work? 1.17.00: QLP - The bakery items that keep you coming back 1.23.00: Body size and jealousy levels See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

from the ZM Podcast Network. This is Fleshwood and Haley's Big Pod. Brought to you by Chemist Warehouse. The biggest brands at the lowest prices. Good morning, happy Friday. Welcome to the show,

Fletchbourne and Haley. Every day's a struggle. Nah. Fri-anely. Fri-A-nally. That's definitely not what you meant to say. Fri-nally. Fri-nily, Friday.

It's franily, Fri-A-Sie. Yeah, guys, it's Friday. What are you doing for the weekend, Vaughn? Because we've just had a slushy handover in the car park. He said it was like a reverse carjack. Yeah. I pulled in and I parked right on the side and I got out and I was like... What's happening?

What's happening? What's happening? Take this slushy machine. Take this slushy. So slushy machines changed hands. Right, you've got custody this weekend. Yeah, I saw that before. I was hoping it wasn't going to fly you away.

Is the MOTH and little MOTH? Little. Little. Yeah. What am I doing? Field days. Of course. All day at the field days.

Because I went the other day for a quick visit. Gorgeous. But yeah, I'm really looking forward to it. Just having a mozy around and a look. And not being hurried. Really sounding like those hedges of mine aren't getting... No, no mention of Haley's Hedges.

You said you'd do those this weekend. I am going to do those. I might actually look for some new hedge drum equipment at the field days. I've got two hedgerming. It's all there waiting for you, mate. Yep. The top six coming up soon.

There's been a university study from the UC. It's looking at, it's weird. They're like, maybe we should eat leaves if something goes wrong. Everyone's like, the world starts ending. We kind of do eat leaves. We're very selective about what kind of leaves we eat. Lettis is a leaf. Yeah, mesculine.

We eat herbs, mint, orangut. Yeah, that's the leaves of a herb plant. So we do already eat some leaves. Yeah, but when there's like, I don't know, a war or something and there's no food left, what leaves are edible? I think we, if they were tasty, we'd already be eating them. Yeah, we eat some forms of grass, don't we? Get him fletch.

Oh, you hit him. Goodbye. He bounced out of. We're chasing a moth around. Oh, wow. I like to tell you. I got the moth. Yeah, you got the screen.

Haley's very, very anti-the-M-O-T-A. Yeah, if you're just joining the show for the first time, I'm born, I've got children. I live on a little lifestyle block. And I don't have much of a filter. I'll say anything. She'll say anything and she's terrified of moths. And Fletch loves cats And he's just a single guy out there living

Welcome. Welcome to the show. Those are our distinct characters. Back to where eating leaves. That's right. The top six soon. Yeah, yeah, top six recipes for leaves. But next on the show, it's also sort of like plant-based. There's an issue in Masterton. Oh no, not the beautiful Wider Upper.

Play Z-N's, Fleth for an inhalate. I was going to say, are you going to shit on the Wider-Upper? No, I'm not going to. I'm not going to. Because you know I've got deep connections, deep roots in the wider upper. I've only been a couple of times and I've found it charming. Charming. Endaring.

I went in summer. It's probably put my first house in lovely featherston. She's a bit cold in winter. Is that a fair call? Freeze it. Well, it's Wellington extension, basically. It's on Wellington grade weather, is it? Marston currently minus two degrees.

Jeez, the way. Whereas, you know, Wellington's 10 at the moment. Palmies 12, so it's a... How the hell has Wellington been so barmy this one? way. Bammy. It's been bamy. It's been bamy.

Well, it's turning around. To terms to Marston and a Queen Elizabeth Park historical botanical gardens. I know it well. It's a beautiful garden. Really? Yeah, lovely. Very popular. And there's a fern house?

There's a fern house. Is that sort of a heated situation? Because ferns do love a warm attempt. They're normally a glass house, aren't they? So they're very warm. Get sweet. It's sweet. Nice and sweet.

Well, this from the Marston District Council. Unfortunately, we've had to close the fernery in Queen Elizabeth Park. today. We've had several incidents recently are people defecating in the fernery. Oh for God's sake the shit in the ferns. This is a public health hazard now teams are in the process of cleaning it up. Aiming to have it reopened by Thursday. Is this a serial? This kind of behaviour, although rare, is completely unacceptable and disrespectful to other park users. We have excellent public toilets

literally two minutes from the funerary. I was going to say do they have toilets in the park? They do. No excuses. No. And apparently these public toilets regularly praised public toilets. Is it like when you go to Mighty Ten or Bunnings or a library there's that phenomenon where you just need to poop all of a sudden?

My shop shops. If I'm ever in a save mart or something you go and you're like right what but oh. It's the smell, hey, we've talked about this. There's something in the smell and it sets you off. But maybe there's something in the change of temperature or the smell in the fernery and then all of a sudden people are, I've got to go.

I've got to poop. Why not poop in the ferns? So this, pooping in the ferns, on the scale of Code Browns that have been public news here in Altao in New Zealand Where does it sit? Well, where does it shit? Obviously not as bad as the public pools.

The pools were... The Queensland's Invocable mystery pool pooper That went on for ages And it went unsolved as well They never caught that person. The poo jogger, that was Australia, wasn't it? Yeah, Australia had the poo jogger Yeah.

They were caught, though, were. They were caught, though, were. They were caught, though, they were. They were just running and pooping and stuff. That was another moth. Stop saying the word. It's on your tummy. It's on your shorts.

Attack! It's got it. It's dead. Sack them. If you've just joined us, we're having some sort of invasion of MOTHs in the studios. I don't know where they're coming from.

Feeling uneasy. So is there going to be an investigation because surely the botanical fernery would have C-C-T-Barrie. Would it? Maybe outside, maybe some other bits and pieces. Right. Well, if you're visiting, please, don't do that.

For heaven's sakes. If you are the most of God. Masterton, Furnary Shitter. And you are our list. Well, no, shame. Come up with a better name like the fernery fecesa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The fesherne, the fecal fern...

Phel. Phantom. The phantom fernetiaator. Fisciator. Fentum fernary fecesator. Yeah. The mastodin phantom fernerystiaator. Yep. Cut it out.

Play that ends. Flesh, Vaughan and Haley. From the unmoderated comment section, this is the top six. The University of Canterbury, there's a professor there, David, who has spent a decade studying food resilience in extreme scenarios. Like the impending World War III? Yeah! Do you know what I was reading, I saw yesterday,

that the Ukraine-Russia thing's gone longer than World War I? Holy Shee. Are you kidding me? Yeah. Wow. And Iran and 10th century. there ratcheting up in the last 24 hours. Oh, good.

You know, great news if you're heading soon to Europe, Haley. Yeah, that's good news. Must be tough there. I mean, I'm probably bottom of the barrel for people that it's affecting, but thank you for thinking of me. Yeah. Well, David said we need a broader effort to identify practical ways to prevent mass starvation with global food systems are severely disrupted. That's grim, sense of that.

It's just like, how is this happening? You need to get your veggie garden extended Vaughn. I actually would love. I'll come around while Vaughan's asleep and steal some licious. No, need to steal. I've got citrus sorted. Can I have a little update? Nanny's rhubarb?

Oh shit. Needs a feed. Man, rhubarb's a greedy little bastards, eh? Yeah. Yeah, I know. It's hanging on. Alive, though. Alive and well.

Alive and well. Well, we need to be foraging more leaves to eat. So I've got the top six leaf recipes. Right. Did they say in this report what we can eat and what we can't? Like, can we eat grass? Yeah. You have wheat shots. We need to eat a lot of grass.

So basically they said forage plants, leaf protein, to make leaf protein concentrate for human consumption, while part of the remaining fibre can be converted into sugar. The idea is to make use of all the plant material, not typically eaten by people. Right. So there's more things to eat. I mean, we do eat a lot of plants already, don't we, as humans?

Some weeks I eat more than others Some weeks I eat more like Breads and meats and meats I also like to eat things that eat plants Same cows Bingo Yep Cheaps

Done Sometimes pigs Yes Lots of chickens So here's top six leaf recipes Okay That I've thought I could whip up Well number six on the list

You've heard of loaded nachos And we've got lots of clover So get ready for clovered nachos Clovered nachos Clovered nachos Clovered No. Okay.

So what's the nacho though? Oh, it's chips. So we're still eating chips. Wait, I thought we didn't have food that's why we're eating leaves. No, we've got to eat the chips. So we've got chips, but the loadedness is Clovers. Yeah, right. Moolet up clover.

Okay. Number five on the list. Well, you like fakasha. I love fuchsia. I have fuchsia trees. How about I introduce you to fuchsia? Circular slice of fischachia. Okay.

Is this in a world where we've run out of olives? Yeah. Okay. And big bits of salt. Are you mulling up your fuchsia leaves to make the flour for the fuchsia caches? Correct, yeah. Right. Yeah, some flowers on top.

Yuck. Yeah, taste yuck. Yeah, taste yuck. I hope you guys have a lot of sauce. Number four on the list of the top six leaf recipes. We all love chocolate moose. Yes. And we all love manuka trees because they're everywhere.

Can I introduce you to moose nuca? We make moose. You know what? We could actually make... Too close to Moose Knuckle. You should see it written down. It looks very vulgar. Moose Knooker.

Moose Knooker. You guys want some pottergo? I've made a fresh... Moose No, I'm not touching your moose no. I'm not touching your moose nooker. All right, well, maybe number three on the list is another pod you might want to touch. Okay. We all love Tidemisu across the board.

Love a Tidemus. And we've got Riemud Trees. Yep. Let me introduce you to Tidoo. Summa. Okay. That's all right. Teter misuma.

Using the leaves of the... As what, mate. The bark. Well, we lay at the bark. Right. As the lady fingers. Yeah. And we soak it in what?

Cream. Coffee. And coffee. God, if this is the end of the world and we're eating this, I'm out. Just shoot me, eh. Let's eat Vaughn. I'll go there first before a tetamissuma. Yeah.

Number two on the list of the top six leaf recipes. This will be especially good around Christmas when they're flowering. because we all love the Pahuta Kawa. Yes. And we're not too Fussy when it comes to a seafood chowder. Let me introduce you there, the Pahuta Chowder. It's bright red.

Which bits are in it? The bits, the flowers. Yeah. Oh, the whole lot, mate. Leaves, sticks. All these recipes also, remember when you were a kid and you'd be like, I'm going to make a potion. And you get a bucket. And you just go around the yard, chucking all the stuff. Yeah, a mud's high.

And then you try to fix trees. Yeah, but smear it on. Smear it around. Your parents come home. You've made a bloody mess. And now you're just bloody love your kids to go outside and play with some mud. Get off the tablet. Number four on the list.

Sorry, number one? Why don't I go back to four? Number one on the list of the top six left recipes. It involves our big dog, the coldie tree. Oh, Kilda. Because what else do we love? We love a Koldi. Yeah.

We love a curry. Let me introduce you to the Karrari. The Koura Kari. The Kourri. A butter chicken. A butter chicken curry. Right. But there were no chicken in it.

No, that's the cordon. No, that's butted Cody. Okay. Right. Okay. How long are you going to have to soak that? Chewy. Chewy.

Chewy. That is today's stopsock. The ZM Podcast Network. Is this a show real? Play ZDM's Flesh, Foran and Haley. The Mum's group on the Kmart Mums Australia Facebook group. Jesus. What an absolutely insufferable group. Well, yeah, but yes and no, because you often get some great tips.

No, I know. That's what I mean. the swings and roundabouts of it. Because everyone's got an opinion. Guys, I've purchased this thing for $4 from came out, and I've repurposed it, and it just looks like a big bag of trash. Well, a post has gone viral because a mother purchased a $6 Australian, so what, about $7 New Zealand.

Beautiful conversion. A standing Tyrannosaurus foil balloon. Cool, man, dinosaurs. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you'd buy them for the kids' birthday. Yeah, dinosaur dress. Can you see anything wrong with that, Haley? It's got a big dick.

It's got a penis. It does have a fat wang. It's got a big fat. How big was a T-Rex wang? Well, it might have been proportional. You know how the arms a little? Oh my God. It was a lipstick?

Like a dog that came real red on the tip. Things we Google on the work Wi-Fi. Dinosaurs penises. Dinosaurs. Rex may have had an organ ranging from 10 inches to several feet long. 10 inches. The giant titanosaur would have packed a member up to 12 foot long.

Jeez. Big your pardon. I'm sorry, that's two of me. I'm sorry, I've got a headache. I'm sorry, I've got a headache. Yeah, I'm not feeling very well. I don't know where you think you're putting that. It's two hand stuff.

This poster went viral. The valve, the blow-up valve for the balloon is exactly where you would find the member. The member, and it's poking out like a member. So a woman shared on this Facebook group, I just bought this balloon for my daughter's birthday, and there's something a little off-potting about the blowhole, wrote Alita Smith in the Kmart, Mum's Australia Facebook group.

And it's gone viral because there have been over 4,000 likes, many shares. And, yeah, some people saying that may not be accidental. But then, I don't know where you'd put it. Would you put it on the tail? The tip of the tail. Yeah, the underside of the tail. The tip of the nose, the back of the. a head anywhere but it's doodle.

Well, you know, most people see the hilarity in this, but then some people are like, it's offensive for my children. There's other balloons with blow-up points. I saw this article. There's other balloons with blow-up points. Yeah, there's a Spider-Man with a... Dingle?

Yep. A wang. More dinosaurs. It's a Minecraft, Steve. Yeah, a spaceman with a doodle as well. I mean, you've got to blow them up somewhere. You've got to buy them up somewhere and why not in their favorite place? So are they going to be recalled or anything?

Or they just sell them out. No, no, no, nothing like that. So actually it's an anatomical debate about the dinosaur penis. Some believe in the cloaca fairy. Oh. As many birds and reptiles do not have external panises. Instead, they share a single opening use for waste production and egg laying knowing as a cloaca.

No, but I thought only females had cloacas. No, barely males have a cloaca of sorts. Because what is a chook? How does a chicken? How does chickens have sex? It's inside and it comes out. So on the evolutionary tree, many basal bird lineages like ostriches and ducks actually possess prominent,

sometimes uniquely corkscrew-shaped penises. Crocodiles, and this is I didn't know, have smooth cylindrical penises. Now, speaking of members, I was sent a reel, and can I bring in producer Carwin here, Carwin reads on Instagram. All about the smut books, and you are too, Haley. Someone sent me a reel.

And it was every character in the smart box and how big their member was. And they were all massive. Oh, my gosh, do you know what, actually? That's like the big thing. And especially because we're talking about a dinosaur balloon here, there are... Beasts, monster.

Do you know what? Someone suggested a book that I should get all three of you to react to, which is an MOTH man. This is not funny to me. What if he was real hot though? No. But dusty. No, I'm drawing the line.

But remember the Mary the milking farm one? Morning Glory. Morning glory milking farm. Yeah. By the way, if you don't know that, have a look. But this real had no average man-human size. No. It's really setting women up for a lot of disappointment.

So I've just looked up a chicken's having sex. Let me put on my glasses. And so he does. He has an in-in-y. that then becomes an outy into the cloaca. The cloaca must be a minute. Also, that photo doesn't nearly cover how aggressive birds are when they make love. They look quite placid there, don't they?

No, ask me how my day was. She's like, right. Put your claws through my gizzard, you know? Take me out for a couple of worms first, you know? Exactly. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flash for an Havorn and Havisad. silly silly little poll today regarding vacuum cleaners

Stick versus drag around You've gone Robo I have I have So there's Robo which is in a league of its own But like still doesn't do as good a job as just getting in there and do it yourself No but it saves you the time and it happens more regularly So it's good maintenance Yeah yeah yeah yeah

It's a good maintenance back But what kind of vacuum do you prefer Wireless stick style or old school drag around because I busted out the old school, drag around at the week. God, it did a good job. Elite sucker, James. It just sucks when you have to plug it in all the time. You're moving around.

And that thing where you like tug and then you go and pull it out and you bent the bloody plug-in bit and you're like, or it gets caught snagged on something. It's pulling your furniture. When you're dragging it around. If you get a good stick one, and even some of the Kmart ones are amazing. Totally. If you get a good stick, they're fine.

I mean, I've got an apartment, so it's not a huge house. Yeah, mine's not huge. My dad, because I've mostly wooden floors, my dad loves a sweep. I love a sweep. He gets in there. He's like, oh, no, no, no, I'll just sweep and then brush shove. And I'm like, on your mat. I bought a steam mop.

Oh, I can. Steam mop. Yeah, love a steam mop. I've got a Kmart steam mop. Is it a big triangle here? Triangle. I had an old one and just recently it snapped at the handle. I was like, well, that for 30 bucks, that lasted like six years.

Yeah, we love that. Pretty good. Did a great job. Well, we asked, what kind of vacuum do you prefer the old wireless stick or the drag around 69%? Nice. Said the wireless stick style. Yeah. Charge it, charge the battery and then get around the house before it runs out.

31% preferring the old drag around. Vicky said stick only as a teenager I tripped over the drag along while vacuuming and broke my wrist. It's traumatic for me never again. Oh, you're stubbing your toe on the body? Yes. The grudgy body. Jimmy said robotic for me. And we're like, yeah.

Gemma. It's been nice. Must be nice. I want to prefer stick style, but I've had problems with the connections going into the head multiple times and you have to buy a whole new piece. Old school drag around is way more reliable. Oh, no. Oh, the old workforce. Paula said the one my cleaner brings and uses so I don't have to.

Well, yeah, no, north. Oh, flex from Paula. They've got the Ghostbusters backpack ones here. Always thought that'd be a bit of a burgeon move for the house. Yeah, I used to clean. When I was a cleaner, I had one of those. Man, it rules. Strap it on.

Strap it on. Good power, I can collect a lot. Is this when you call? cleaned for your dad's business and he paid you $80 an hour. Dude, he paid, the money was redong. Yeah, it was crazy. It was mad. And men I did such a shit job.

Yeah, and that's why she's housing her parents now because of all of this fraudulent, freebies throughout her life. She's a nepo cleaner. Yeah, I am. Marissa says, the sticks don't suck hard enough for the black lab here. She's got an indoor shitty dog. Yeah, my cat, when it gets to October, I need a vacuum at least once or twice a day. Is your cat really fluffy at the moment? Of the cult, Raleigh is so...

He looks ginormous. Because of the cold fluff. Because of the cold. Yeah. And he's fat. Yeah, it'll be that. It'll be both. Edel says, Edel.

Eadel. Is that how you'd say it? Edel. Eiddle. Edel. Edel. Edel. Edel.

Eidle. Neither. I have a plug-in hose that's connected through internal pipes to go under the garage. Oh, yeah. Those are posh, aren't they? Until you suck up something and they get stuck in a wall pipe. Yeah, and you're like... And also, just, like, dragging around that pipe locks a little bit.

cumbersome sometimes. How long is the pipe and how often... Obviously they work it out so you can get to every corner of your house. Do you remember JJ Feney had that burgy internal vacuum system back of the day? And you used to sweep stuff into a corner and then flip the switch and I'll go...

Yeah, I remember that time we were there, we were around at her place drinking and I put a lambington in it. And it's... I've never been to JJ Fienies. It's pretty my time and I honestly feel like I've missed out on a whole world. It's beautiful. Pre-man-o-no, mate. Yeah, well, she's got that nice little apartment now.

Lovely. Carry on. Exposed concrete ceilings. I've always liked those. It's a good look. Alisa says old school plug-in. Batteries are a pain in the ass when you really need them. They do.

I chuck the old dice and stick on to full grunt. Oh, it doesn't like that. And I've got about five minutes to do that. Yeah, yeah, totally. And that's on a new battery too. Ooh, going from socket to socket, plugging and unplugging it. This feels so ghetto to me, says Monique. Ghetto.

Minique. Monique. Monique. Monique, let's just check ourselves now. It's not. It is annoying, though. once you've gone to a stick, you could never go back. You're so free, it's so light.

Ash says, what absolute effing criminal still rather a plug-in? Christ, I'm plugging at every bend because it doesn't reach, having to take both ends to the main hose to take it out. Yes. Swung it out on the grass and get the chunks of hair and fluff out of it, your monsters. Stick, stick, stick. Okay, breathe. My robot vacuum in a mop, says Allison. So for silly little poll today, we said,

what kind of vacuum you guys preferring? While a stick vacuum wins at 69%. The ZDM Podcast Network What's going on? ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley So you know at the moment If you've just to win the show, I'm... You're Haley.

I'm Haley. I'm a comedian by night And I don't have much of a filter on me. I'll say almost anything. That's Vaughn over there. He's a dad and a farmer. And that's Fletch's got a cat And otherwise lives a life.

Feel free to introduce yourself. Yeah, yeah. On the text machine, 966. 96. Ashley introduced herself before. I'm Ashley. I use your show as an alarm. clock because you three, the best type of noisy.

Not my character on the show, but context for what I'm doing here. Lovely. Thanks, Ashley. Welcome to the show. Best kind of noisy. Yeah, love that. Okay. That's going to billboard.

Yeah. So, yeah, I'm emptying my garage at the moment because I've got plans for this garage, right? And this, and today, my sexy little skip turns up. So I've been to... What size have you gone for? I hadn't asked. Not huge. Nine cube.

I always go for a 12 cube because I get carried away and I always have someone to chuck a nine. I always love when someone in the neighbourhood gets a skip and you can just go around. Just before work and chuck stuff in it. Yeah, when living in the suburbs, yep, when I did and had a skip, that was fun, not. But the best part was watching people jump into the skip

because they walked past and had nosy and saw something in the skip they might like. Yeah, nice. Got a nine square. I'll get a bigger one soon. Nine cube. You pay for weight. No, but you pay if you go overweight.

All right. You pay for size. And I'm nervous because this has happened to me before. It's going to rain this weekend and it makes everything heavier. Such pain. Get a tarpaulin. Smart thinking for me. I've got 1,350 KJs.

And Dr. Shawnee is coming over tomorrow and he's he kind of bring a little bit of shit. And I was like, fine. What's he bringing? I don't know. Anyway. I mean, you do owe him every time you've got a rash or a spot or a dot. I'm in dead.

So I'm emptying out this garage right. And part of it is going through childhood things. Yes. And I found yesterday this photo from the year 2000, which was year five and six. So I was in year six. in this year, just pre-intermediate. I definitely wasn't my first year at uni in the year.

Don't worry about how age difference is. So there's me and there's my best ed gess, right? Wait, that, right? Pass it over. God, do you guys look exactly the same. Yeah, I know, we did, for years. And then I just kept getting taller and she didn't. So... Wait, is that you in the back?

Is that you there? Yeah, back, centre left. I'd never expect that was you. I know. People always say you don't look like you do as a kid. And I was replaced, like Avril Levine. And Jess... Jess doesn't really look like... Yes, either.

No, not a hell of a lot. Anyway, so I saw, I found this school photo. What are all these other clowns up to? Yeah, yeah, so here's the phone. Oh, no, I love this game. So, the game goes. So I looked at this photo. Chuck it here.

So I looked at this photo. You know, your traditional school photos. It's got the board with the year as well. Oh, no, who did ours? Bob Bradley did out. Yeah, we were always Elsie Scott. That's who did the New Plymouth ones as well. I think he just literally went round.

I must have been on the road the whole time, mate. He had a stranglehold on the school photography market. Dude, did he want? I'm imagining he lives in a mention. Yeah. Bob Bradley school photos. Elsie Scott, see what he's up to. So anyway, here's the game.

Because I was looking at the school photo of which there are 1, 2, 3, 4, you know, say, how many is that? 20 kids? Yeah. And I was like, there's me, there's Jess, you know. And then I was like, there's Mike McJow, there's so-and-so. And then I was like, who the hell are these other people? And I'm getting to that age where, like, unnecessary memories of food. baneing away.

And I'm just holding on to things that I need. They're replaced by more important things like cocktail recipes. Cocktail recipes. Exactly. Or like, what are we doing this weekend? So I messaged Jess and I said to her almost, Do you want to play a game? I said, um...

Because that photo's weird because I remember ours had all the names. Yeah. Yeah, we did. No, so that's... You can write it on the back. You can see I wrote Mr. Pointing was the principal. Mrs. Nimmo was the teacher, but I never filled in the names. Finding Nimmo.

Fine. Where is Mrs. Nemo now? Let's find it. It's a bit rude. Should I give respect for the teachers, please? If you know, teachers respect, how do we expect the students to? Yeah, true. Sorry, Mr. Smith.

Yeah, damn right. Now, go out and pick up rubbish. I would have had you on rubbish duty. Pretty bloody smartly, young man. Yeah. Now when you order it, when I've ordered the kids, school photos, it's extra to get the names on, Cheeky Bastards. You can get just a photo like that, or you can get extra.

You pay a little extra last time I did it, and you got the names. It's an ad-on. Unbelievable. So here's the thing. So I message Jess and I say, do you want to play a stupid game? This is at 136. Yeah.

And I put in brackets, it can be at a slow pace. She works full time and she's a mom. You know. And she said, at three o'clock, she said, absolutely. I said, here's a photo of our year six class. I'm going to zoom in on a face

and you tell me their name for one point. Start easy. And I send a photo. She goes, Rebecca Bowen. I say correct. What's Rebecca Bowen up to these things? I went to high school with Rebecca Bowen. So we ended up doing five more years together.

She's married now. She's got kids. Lovely. Came from a lovely family. One point for a name. Was there additional points to be able to tell you what they're up to nowadays? No. But I reckon this is the next step that you should play with your best days.

I said, nailed it. And then she asked me, are you giving me an autism test? Because just tell me if you are, I can handle it. I said, no, no. I send her the next face. She says, Alice Pearson. I said, correct. Photo.

She says, too easy. Mike McJaro. Correct. Quite, Jess is nailing that. We're having this. I don't think I'd remember half of... So that's the thing. The game's ongoing, by the way,

because then we got busy. But I would send one and we're like, I don't know who the hell that is. That feels familiar to me. And we both try to work it out. Was his name? This is this. It's so fun.

It's also very confronting as to how many people have you forgotten. Because for me, most of them. Yeah. I genuinely could. It's so much fun. If you find your school photo, get your school photo.

Yeah. Get your school bestie, take a photo of the whole thing, and you could go face for face. So you go, I'm going to send you a face, you tell me their name, you get a point. And that's a name. You send me a face. Class who, who dat. Who dat? Who dat?

Class who. Yeah, class who's nice. Class who. Yeah, class who. Class who. This is the game. The fun is trying to guess when you play class who, class who. Get your primary school photo, get your primary school best friend, take a photo of the whole thing and go face for face.

One of point. She has a pretty white class. Dude, this was mutatized school in Eastbourne. I was the most Māori there. Other than that chick next to me, we're holding the bloody. You're holding the 40. Holding the mana right there. Yeah, holding down the path.

Do you get five points if someone's in prison? I reckon that could be the level two, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where are they now? One guess. Yeah, and if they're like, you know, if they're a CEO or something, or they're famous, you get extra points. Like, I don't know who that chick is. Who are you?

He's got a great bob. She's got one hell of a heavy bob on her. It feels like the year 2000 would have been a tad late for that, Bob. Yeah. A tad late for that Bob. That's got real early eyes. Yeah. Anyway, a lot of fun and good for the memory.

Play ZM's Flesh, Forne and Haley. Producer Shannon's unpredictable history. Yes. Well, our producer Shannon, she loves her reality TV show trash, but she'll always end the day with some history, some learning, a documentary. To cleanse the palate. And a segment was born Where producer Shannon tells us

Something unpredictable From the annals of time From the anals of time That probably we don't know Annals of Time And where in the anales of time are we going today Shannon? We're going back to France in the 1600s

Oh Tid up your corset and get ready Hey Today we're talking about Julie She was a opera singer And she is known as The Lesbian Diva of France.

Yes, Queen. The lesbian diva of France. Yeah, it was not super good to be gay back then. It was not super good to be gay. I mean, throughout his strap, the Romans had it sorted. Yeah, the Romans are living.

Glitnerce feasts and heaps of gay orgots. Didn't they love gay soreners? They invented the gay sauna. Literally they did. Oh yeah. Yeah, well, Julie was a lesbian diva. Some have said bisexual, but I believe she was a lesbian diva. So she was kind of betrothed to a man

and was like not for me. She fell in love with her best friend. I believe you pronounce it, Sarrain, Saran. Sarah. You just choose it. Yeah, let's go Sarah. And so her and Sarah were in love and she was like, let's run away together. They tell Sarah's.

After a week, they're like, let's move into a castle. Yeah, they're going to do all. Lesbans move quick, don't they? They'll make everything. They do. I got you a candle. They tell Sarah's parents, they're like, we're gay and they're like, no. no, no, no. Again, I said it's not super good to give me gay back then.

No, no, no, no, no gay. They send Sarah off to a nunnery. They're like, you're now a nun. That'll fix you? Yeah, totally. Putting you with all these women. Woman who have been sent there because they said they were gay too. So Julie, lesbian diva, as I've said, was not happy about this.

So she said, let me head off to the nunnery with her. You know, natural choice. Fix me too. Yeah, oh my God. Crazy. Can we get beds next to each other in the nunnery just for like comfort? Yeah, but you know, obviously when they were at the nunnery, they couldn't hook up because God was watching, I guess. Oh my God, that's the worst one God's watching. I'm like, I actually like it when he watches.

God's in the cut chair. Yeah. The cut cloud. And he's the, God might be watching. I bloody hope he is. Watch, watch this God. They're in the nunnery and they just want to leave and be lesbians, you know? Don't we all?

Don't we all? Don't we all? Yeah, I know. Isn't it crazy how history just repeats itself? Yeah, I know. History. There's something in that. So they're like, we've got to get out of this nunnery, but we don't know what to do.

And as you know, nuns tend to be quite old and, you know, slow and stuff. One of them just happened to die, like just because she was old. Oh, that's so sad. And so they're like, this is our opportunity. They grab this nun's body. Stay with me. And they put it in their room and set the body ablaze. It's a bit grim.

It's history. It's always a bit grim. It's always a bit grim. They said the body ablaze and then put their clothes by it and they're like, ooh, it was us who died and they run away. Faced your own death. Perfect. My only qualm was this, that's one body and there's two of them. Yeah.

History really breezes over that part. Everyone's just like they burned the body and said it was us and left. Because to burn a body to a dust, not in a crematorium takes forever more. But you just need to burn it until it was not recognizable. Yeah, but it's still definitely recognizable as one. Yes. Yeah, you know, like everyone just kind of breezes over that, but they ran away together. What did they, did they, like, it was spontaneous combustion?

You know, again, it's just this beautiful lesbian love story and everyone just really, where'd they end up? And also, did nobody miss the old nun? The one that actually died? Like, did these people not watch True Prime TV or documentaries? They need to get their ears on a podcast to work, there's flaws in this. There's some holes everywhere. Real big holes in this.

There's big holes. But long story short, A lesbians, Julian Sarah ended up happily ever after After they... Running an Airbnb. In the French countryside. Adopted a kid from a local neighbourhood.

Yeah. They ended up happily ever after. Oh, that's super gay and super great. Love that. Gay history is its own sort of feature in itself, isn't it? Yes, yes. Maybe we could do that in Pride Month. It is.

It is. Well, for the northern hemisphere it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We get two Pride Months. It's so greedy of us. New Zealand's just gay all year. Do you know what I mean? We just keep it gay the whole time and proud.

We're not on board with that. No, I'm on board. You're actually a silence speaks volumes. No, voicemids just imagine lesbians hooking up. Yeah, in all the seasons. Like with leaves falling, with the daffodils going, snow, super hot. Great episode of Unpredictable History, Samu.

Yeah, really good. We love it. And it's why it's better than Shannon's hacks, I think, this segment. Because I've heard what her next hack is. She was throwing it around today, and I just thought, Jesus. Well, that segment's near Kahnian. cancellation, isn't it?

Well, the text machine begs to differ. That's the problem. It's not about what we think it's for the listener. The Z&M's Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley. Imagine this. You're at the Governor's Ball, huge concert. Tyler the creator, Benson Byrne, Olivia Rodrigo, and hosier glass animals.

And the one and only Lord is there. Wow. And T. Yeah. And T. Pei Pay. Oh, the back street lovers. I got excited. Anyway.

You thought it was a back street boy. I did, I did. So you're there over the weekend at the Governor's Ball, huge concert. You are 12 years old, and you were there to see your Lord and Savior Lord. Yep. And at 12 years old, you go to the bathroom, and that's when you realize you are experiencing womanhood for the first time. Oh, wow. First period ever.

She's in the bathroom, and she comes out, and she's like, and she sees another girly pop in the bathroom. She's got glitter all over her face, and she's talking about how much she's excited to see Lord. and this 12-year-old goes up to this woman and is like, do you have anything? I just got my first period. And the girl's like, oh my God, welcome, gives her a cuddle, gives her a pad. She's like, let's go, we're going to go see Lord together. I don't know where this kid's parents are.

It's not my problem. Not my problem. You know what I mean? Well, so who was sharing this, the girl at... The girl who gave her the pad. Oh, right, okay. She was like, oh my God, I'm at Governor's Ball. I'm about to see Lord.

This 12-year-old comes up to me in the bathroom is like, do you have anything for me? And she's like, girl, I got you. Oh, that's sweet. I know. That sisterhood of the travelling pad, which you use once. And you never, yeah, anyway.

So we all remember this moment. Well, you guys won't. No. We all remember this moment when you got your first period. And this is, I just think we could have a little share. Because it is sometimes mortifying. And also being your first, you're like,

oh, God, like what is happening? Because you can't help where you are. In the world, you could be anywhere. I was very lucky. I was at home and it was Easter. a long weekend. So it was like a Saturday or a Sunday. I was at home and went to the bathroom and I was like,

I'm dying. No, no, I was well. You were well informed. Yeah, I was like 13 and a half. So, you know, lots of my friends had already had it. And I text my mum on her Nokia brick. Yep. Saying, it happened.

Was she at an open home? She was in an open home. She was in an open home. And she screeched around and she had this like bag of pads and ice cream and treats and chocolate and we spent the rest of the day together watching movies. So I was lucky. At home, no, nothing embarrassing.

I've gotten it randomly in embarrassing moments, but I want to know where were you when you got your first period? Fletch, Vaughn? I cannot contribute to this topic. That's fine, you can text in 9696 if you can't contribute. You're always like hearing from people that can't have, don't have anything to add to the topic on 9696, as well as those who do have a story.

Well, maybe you've got a sweet moment. at this music festival or maybe it's horrific and you were just like, I don't know what to do. Jeep, as someone messaged, I was going to a pool party at my friend's house, we're okay. Okay. My friends had to sit outside the bathroom

and coach me on how to put a tampon in. I've done this before with friends. But isn't it like, it's kind of what you want to do, Lucy. You kind of like bend your knees and like squat down a bit. Yeah. And go backwards, not up. It's not going up.

Open the door. We're coming in. We're coming in. That's the angle. That's the angle. All right. Well, 800 dials at M. If you've just joined the show,

we are doing one of our famous phone and topics where we lean heavily on the listener. Yeah, because we're the best list list. We've got the best lists in the business. There's no doubt about it. And we're talking about where you were when you got your first period. Because this happened to a girl at a festival in America.

A 12-year-old was waiting to see Lord went into the toilet, had her first period came out and asked, had to ask a stranger girly pop for a pad. And luckily she had it. And the girl in the video was like, welcome to womanhood. It sucks. So, man, we're in undated with messages.

Oh, some wholesome stories. Some wholesome ones and some truly traumatizing. Rachel, what happened? Oh, good morning, guys. Well, I was eight years old, and I was at my nannas, and I found blood am manicures. Yeah. And at eight years old, I'm dying. Yeah, yeah.

That's early. That's early. Eight is early. Really early. Yeah. Thank God my mom was there, and I went out. and I said, I've got blood in my pants. And she was like, oh, darling, that's your first period.

And I was like, my first was. Yeah, eight. Because you wouldn't even, you wouldn't have had the chat at eight. No, probably not. I have no idea. No. God, I know. Yeah.

Yeah, man. And so that was your introduction. Early eight. For womanhood. Thank God for mom. And, of course, I go to school. Everyone knows. And they're like, oh, you got a bleater.

And I'm like, you've got a bleeder. Everyone knows? What a mum put in the newsletter or something? I have no idea. Maybe I told my best friend and she'd lay her died. Oh no. Yeah, well, jokes on them because it's all coming for them one day, too. Yeah, exactly.

You're going to be a veteran by the time they get it. Yeah, exactly. Yours will be over before theirs as well, thank you. Rachel, thank you, Sally. What happened? School camping trip in the middle of nowhere. No, no. We're using Kawa Kawa leaves.

No, Sally. The old school way. Yes, yeah. I woke up in my tent wondering if I'd been stabbed in the stomach because I'd really bad bellyache and lots of blood. Oh, Jesus. I didn't quite figure it out for a minute.

Did you find a teacher or were their parents in? No, I managed to flag down a teacher and after a wee while they kind of discreetly but not discreetly got me out of the tent and to a local farmhouse where they let me shower. Oh, my God. And you always remember that moment because that's so traumatic.

Oh my God, my love. Yeah, yeah, put me off camping for life. Yeah, I bet it does. Would you go glamping? Would you go glamping or not even glamping? Well, maybe, maybe. Maybe, but still a hotel is nice. Glamping with a real sorted kit just in case.

Sally, thank you. Haley, what happened? Hi, I was home alone and so no, mom wasn't there, and I decided, oh, I'm a big girl. I can use her super-sized tampon. No, no, you're a child. I was. And turns out you

shouldn't do that, so I got part of my anatomy stuck over it and I couldn't get it out. Wait, wait, wait. I can't visually try to What did you, when you're rocking an applicator? Did you not call mum or something? No. Well, well, she had, yeah, I did have to

in the end, because she had to take me to the doctor. Oh, my. Cut out. Like the piece of swim, which I'm not going to say the piece of skin, but you know. Oh, my God. Haley, your first time you had to be. Oh my God.

So traumatic. Yes, very. I was, I was a little bit, I was a little bit, speechless. I don't know what to say. I was a little bit funny feeling when I could just imagine, you know, cotton or got that really dry. It's dry. It's so dry.

Oh, Hayley. And I was just like, that made me feel funny. And now you had to get something cut out. Oh, Hayley. Oh, my God. Oh, Haley. Babes, did it get better after that? Yeah, yeah, it did.

Okay, great. Far out. You have your hands now, though. Yes, yes. Yeah, no, fair enough. Forgive them. Absolutely. Haley, thank you.

Have a great weekend. Some messages in. I want to get through as many of these as possible because they're so good. I got one on Christmas Day when I was 11. I was told, wow, what a beautiful Christmas present. I was like, are you kidding? I remember this vividly.

My parents were having a house party. My mum was super drunk and dad wasn't too bad. I got it that night, so I had to go and ask Dad, because Mum didn't really know what I was talking about, because she was so pissed. I got mine halfway through school cross-country. No! School cross-country is bad enough, little I experienced in that.

I was 12 in the middle of a corn maze when I got mine. I got lost, and I had to, like, scream out, Halv I've got my parents. I was at swim training. I was at Easter camp. Mum told the whole church. I was like, thanks, Mom, thanks for that. I was out on a bike rider, got home.

I thought it had somehow sat. on the seat wrong and damaged the goods. My best friend's younger sister got her period and I taught her how to put a tampon in. She's now my best friend and my adopted little sister. Oh, that's cute. It was Valentine's Day and swimming sports. I was 14.

I had to swim because I was in the swim team. I got it done. Sharts. Someone's message. I was at Denny's Manico. I just finished meeting Jonah Lomu in the waiting era and then went to the bathroom. Tata!

We salute you. That is iconic for location. It is timely and person. Yeah. Family holiday when it's 13 in New York. I like to say I became a woman in New York City. Oh. Yeah.

My first period was Easter weekend as well. Year 9 I got home from school and quite often would get locked out of the house. I was busting away so I popped a squat in the back paddock and bam. Oh, Jesus Christ. There it was. I had to awkwardly pull my undies back up, no toilet paper or anything. They had to get up a ladder. Climb up the second story balcony because the door was always unlocked.

Pads are waiting inside. That's a lot. Oh, I'm a male year six teacher. I've had so many girls over the years come to me and have to tell me this. One of the nicest comments from one of my kids was, Mr. You handled this really well. Oh, it's lovely. Nice.

I got mine on it for the first time on a plane to Australia when we landed. It was a public holiday and nothing open until 10 a.m. Then my mum bought me the tampons with the applicators. I came out of the bathroom off of it hanging out because no one told me how to do it. It does. You've got to go backwards. It's not up. It's back.

Have you sent Kazmine's message? No. She said, we were in the car and my mum's new boyfriend Mark was driving. He wanted me to call him Dad, but I refused. Mum must have had hers too because she was being a bit. It wouldn't make marks on the car unless I told her why. That's good. Throwback.

Good throwback. Really good. First period at age nine is up my dad's to the weekend. No idea what was happening. Thought I'd cut my bits doing cartwheels or something. Dad called mum yelling that she hadn't taught me anything about the birds and the bees. And mum replied, she's bloody night. I wasn't experienced.

So my step-mom gave me a giant Libra pad, which felt like a napier. And they drove me to my dad's and took Cofota to my mum's in Moranzil. and they sat there mortified and upset like I'd done something wrong and I thought I'd never be able to do cartwheels again. Jesus, that was a lot. Youngest of three girls? Did you read that?

Youngest of three girls got my period told me mum. She said, no, you don't cost a living. Four women, we can't afford it right now. Oh, my God. First period. Was it also at school camp? Woke up, it was bloody carnage who was all through the sleeping bag?

Oh, no. School athletics, I was about to compete in the hurdles. Final one of my classmates helped me out before I had to head to the track and compete in front of the whole school. I was just terrified the tampon was going to fall out. Oh, no. Oh, on a plane to Australia. That's awful when you're a kid.

I was nine. My parents were out. My brother and I had a male babysitter and we were at the video store. Not traumatic at all. No, I bet. I got mine at a sleepaway horse camp and I had to be there for three days without absolutely anything and we were riding horses the whole time. Oh, no.

It wasn't until my mum came to pick me up and she had flowers that it all felt okay. Someone's mum threw them a little party and invited all their friends. That's nice. That's lovely. I was at my friend's wrapping Christmas presents. We went to the toilet, found out I had my period. I went to my friend and I said, I want to go home. I want to go home.

She said, no, we're having fun wrapping Christmas presents. I said, please, let me go home. I just got my period and she was like, oh, I've already had mine. We'll sort it. And then her mum whipped me down to the supermarket, bought me a nearly a year's supply of pads. Oh, get it sorted. Fair to say those Christmas presents still got wrapped. I was not allowed to go home.

Oh, I was about to go on stage for my primary school graduation Kappa Haka performance. Oh, no. Went away from, nervous P, came out with even more nervous and one of a huge wadding DIY toilet paper pad. My mum said to me it would just be a little bit like I've wet my undies. There wouldn't be much of a mark and then we'll sort it out. I work up to bloody Niagara Falls of Blood. I screamed. I thought something's definitely wrong.

There's so many. So many great messages. Oh my God! Yes. Katie? Because you go up and back. I once heard a girl got her period and no one had explained her how to put a tampon

and she just got handed a tampon so she put it in like a hot dog and a bun. Like just open it up. Like that. Like that. Like that. I can totally see how if no one had ever explained it to you you'd be like, of course.

Hot dog in a bun. That's the bum and that's the hot dog. Yeah. Play Z-M's flesh for a one. And Haley. Quick little follow up. We did a silly little poll last week. When you were leaving a wedding,

do you say goodbye to the couple? Yes, always, was 69%. Yes. No, I just leave was 31%. We had a great debate about it. And then yesterday and when I was perusing the internet, somebody popped up on my Instagram Reels, which I thought was a great idea.

So at a wedding, you know, you've got all those boards, here's your bloody table, and here's your whatever. This one was, come here, you little. It says, it's a board It says, are you effing off? Please don't come and find us to tell us that you're effing off,

just F off. We've loved having you celebrate with us. Leave us an I-Eft off message below and we'll read them later. Thank you for being part of us. Right, right idea. Pins there and when you go, I'm just going to do an Irish goodbye,

but you feel bad, they have made it clear. Don't come and bother us. Just write a message to be like, tapped out at one, loved the evening, congrats. I'm off early, I've done. got a headache, see you later. Because you know I love to just leave a house party, slip out the back.

Yeah, you'll let one person know. I might let you know, Haley, but that's about it. But this would be a great idea for a party as well. Leave a board by the door and then you can say you're gone. Yeah. Bloody leave. Are you effing off board? It's a great idea. And everyone was leaving great messages there.

We effed off and left you to party, Casey and Gav, you know? It's a great idea. Yeah, great idea. Because you don't want to annoy the couple. They're busy. Irish goodbye us, but just leave us a little note and we'll be happy. The Z&P Podcast Network Now I wanted to propose a phona here for our listeners

And maybe this is, I don't want to come across as judgmental But yesterday I unfollowed someone That I have followed on social media and YouTube for 11 years Oh wow It was actually she was one of my like number one followers In every video that she would release on YouTube I'd wait for it and watch it, wait for it and watch it Wow

And it's been amazing And I'm not trying to be negative on her at all In fact, I won't even say who it is, but she was just an Aussie girl who started sharing, because she has PCOS, and she had PCOS caused acne, and I had it at the time, so I found this trick through trying to research

how to cure your hormonal acne, and then just followed, you know, then you get to know them, and then you get to follow their life and everything. And then just yesterday, I realized that her life, following her life, actually no longer made me feel good, it actually made me feel quite bad about myself.

You know, like that things changed. Like she's gotten so rich now and she's got three kids now. Her whole life is really... She's boring. No, yeah, the kids make her boring but it's a lot of mum content. Which is also like, I don't need...

That's for mums. I don't need to be following that. But her lifestyle is so far removed from mine that I'm like, I followed you to be inspired and actually just following you. I was like, it just no longer served me. Right.

Because she's just living this, oh la la life or something. She's got a range rover and Louis Vuitton this. and cheek filler and lip filler and these ear extension. Well, I've got hair extension, but you know what I mean? It's just like,

I don't see myself in her anymore. Yeah. That's why I followed her. And you used to. Yeah, and so I was like, unfollow. And it felt like a huge moment because she was just like,

the girl that I followed. And I would look forward to. And I was like, oh, God, it just made me think like, why did you unfollow someone? Maybe it was on Instagram or YouTube or... A friend or an influence? Something like that.

We didn't say who it is. As you say, no need to be unnecessarily. No, because I think she's great for like the mum content and all that kind of, in cooking and fitness. But not for you. For me? It doesn't make me feel good anymore. Not for you.

But I want to know who did you unfollow. Not maybe not who do you unfollow, but why did you unfollow someone? Maybe it was just like they became intolerable. Maybe you were following them for health reasons, but then you found out they were like super right wing and had really controversial opinions that came out during COVID or something like that. Or maybe this was like you were, you know, been following someone from high school and something.

only you were like, oh, oh, we do not align anymore. We're not alike at all. Yeah, why did you unfollow someone? I don't, you know, some people have a hate follow. I've got out of that. Only women do that. Yeah. A hate follow.

Yeah. For show. Yeah. I don't do that. Producer Girlies, do you hate follow anyone? Do you hate following anyone? I'm trying to think about who I hate follow. This guy called Fletch.

That was good. That was good. She's hung over, she's on an on-eat, but she's still got it. My voice is God. You've got it cooked, mate. She had four wines yesterday. Four wines of the heathes last time. And the worst part is, I've lost my voice from going to a musical.

That's sad. They should be singing. That means you had a good time. Yeah. The person, the people around you didn't know. Seriously, though, women do this. There is one person I hate for. Yeah, but what?

Haley Sprout. No, I've got to recycle it that quickly. We are trying to be serious here. Yeah. Oh, for once. Okay, cut her microphone. Cut her mic. She's going to over.

She's such a brat today. Are you being such a brat? Yeah. You've learnt from you guys. No, personally, Carmen Jones does not hate following anyone. Good. It's unhealthy. I don't want to see it.

I know. It's unhealthy. But people do. Yeah, they do. So many messages coming in. This is what I want to know. 0800, dial ZDM. Or a little text or any 9696.

798. Nailed it. We'll be back soon with their opinion. Why did you unfollow someone? So many messages. You don't have to name them either. You can just say why. No, exactly.

We don't want to drag people's name specific into it, but just the reasoning. Someone said I was following a girl who swore by her booty program. And she had lots of followers. Found out she had a Brazilian butt list. And I was like, how dare you? That's false advertising. Unfollowed a good friend of the day. I found out she was traveling to Wellington for those protests during lockdown.

and she was documenting the whole thing. I was like, okay. My auntie was there. My auntie was there with Brian Tamerke. I don't think she threw a brick though. I'd like to distance myself to my family from that. To be honest, if I had to choose, I'd rather my auntie threw a brick

than was hanging out with Brian Tamerke. Yeah, same. I unfollowed my mum on Facebook because she posts so much old people shit like photos of her food and how she's feeling. Yeah. Or bless. unfollowed them when they went into a religious psychosis.

Yep, okay. Fair enough. I used to follow a woman who would judge potlucks. What do you mean judge them? I don't know. She'd have them. She'd have potlucks and talk about the food or something? Now she preaches instead about sending people to prison.

So I unfollowed. I unfollowed a British comedian that I love because I went on a date with his brother and his brother ghosted me afterwards. So I was like, well, I've got to unfollow you now. you're probably ghosted me. I unfollowed my sister-in-law. Her whole page was just so fake.

I know her in real life and she's not living like what she's posting. Great use of AI and I'm not about that fake BS. I unfollowed one of your producers because they unfollowed me. Oh! Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight.

How about all those people that were advocates for body positivity and living in your own body and being who are now on GLP ones and totally abandon their ethos now that weight loss is easy? Yes! Yes! Now, what do we discuss? Yeah, do you know what?

I don't know. It's hard. I don't know. I've got nothing against people using them. It's not personally for me until they are. Yeah. We're against the jab until we're not. But totally that thing of like, like fat positivity.

That's been amazing or body neutrality or like body positivity and being like, I'm not conforming. And it's like by becoming the smallest version of yourself the easiest way, that is, your choice but that's no longer in line with what you preach. So you've got to change your whole thing. Like it's okay to be in your body, but if you can change it, do it. Doesn't. No. It's an interesting one.

It is interesting. Unfollowed someone I really like because I found myself getting jealous and thinking I'm not doing good enough in life in general. Which is a huge problem with social media. You're not seeing this person's bad moments. You know what was lockdown? That was me in lockdown. I had that first seven week lockdown. I was really struggling.

And then you'd see everyone be like, we're baking bread, we're having fun, we're doing walks. I was like, oh, this is terrible. I'm doing it wrong. Yeah. So they unfollowed them. She's an awesome person and I've just realized that I'm just the jealous bitch. But I just had to unfollow it because it wasn't. It was bringing out the worst than me.

Yeah, I'm a big fan on Instagram of, you know, the follow and hide, unfollow and hide. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't feel like that all the time. Because that's your feed. It's for you. So I unfollowed an ex-work friend because she leaned super hard into the arbor. on. Oh, yeah.

A few people were saying about the old multi-level marketing. They were following a person. They liked their life and then, you know, just following their life. They found them an interesting person. Then they got into MLMs. How are you, girl?

Oh, my God. Your skin looks amazing. You'd really benefit from something around the glow. And if you do it, and you're like, oh, my God, what's happening? Somebody said, I unfollowed somebody when they started hosting every other day about the gambling, online gambling. Like promoting online gambling. gambling.

This online gambling thing is insane. I would get two or three emails a week. Hey, we're an international. Yeah, because I guess I'm a white male and we're like the online gamblers. But like young white males,

young males on a whole, but specifically young white males, it's the next massive problem. Yeah. So we're all going to be addicted to gambling. Yeah. And it's, yeah, two or three emails a week from, hey, we're from an international.

They never say gambling. They say like gaming thing. They've been cracking down. down on that. Yeah, it's so bad. Yeah. Somebody said they unfollowed. I unfollowed my best friend's ex after they broke up. She was trying to kick off a music crew and she noticed when I unfollowed her and hit me up

saying, why did you unfollow me? I need every follower to try to get this music crew off the ground. I was like, well, you broke up with my best man and broke his heart. I unfollowed someone just yesterday because they're getting way too preach about not giving screen time to kids. You just got to do what you're going to do. I'm a single mum with a full-time job. I'm sorry with my kid's on their iPad. Yeah.

Totally. Yeah. I unfollowed someone who posted religiously about the war, respectfully go you for being an advocate, but seeing it every day is a bit much for my mental health personally. That's what I struggle. I don't watch the news every night anymore. Because it is like with everything, sometimes you've just got to have a bit of a check, eh?

About like how it's affecting you. I mean, it's horrible. It's unknowably horrible. But man, sometimes you just can't handle that on top of a mental load. I unfollow my brother on Facebook because he started bodybuilding. He's posting all these ooh photos in his speedos. Yeah, we don't need to see that

You don't need to see your brother like that You don't need to see your brother painted all Goldie Brown With us Todd you hanging out The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Flesh forne and Haley Fact of the Day Day, day, day, day, day Yeah

It's Fungo-da-to-to-d-d-d-d-d-tip-tip-tid-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-t... It's Fungus, and going to finish on the fact that a fungus is nature's most powerful cannon. Cannon? Panion. Well, there is one specific one called the hat-throw, the dung-canon or the squirt-gun fungus. Squirt-gun fungus. What now would love that. Fletcher's name of the clubs.

Old squirt gun fungus. Oh my God. Wow. That's insanity to say that. It only grows in herbivore dung. And it is technically a fluid-filled balloon and it has a black spore packet on top containing. And usually spores and mushrooms just kind of let go from under the mushroom and catch the air.

But this one, boom. The balloon absorbs water. up through the base, through the roots. Through its toes. Through the toes of the fungus. And swells until the pressure hits 5.5 atmospheres. 5.5 atmospheres is, I don't know how much. And this is an atmosphere, like, around us.

That's the pressure of the atmosphere. What's five times this atmosphere's pressure? To convert it to PSI, it's 81 PSI. So two and a half times three times your tire. It's a high pressure tire. Well, how much? 81 PSI. That's tight.

You want me to go down to the service station and crank an 81 PSI out of the... I do like a 40. No, no, 35? Yeah, I'll rock about a 32. 32 to 36. I think I'm 35 on the Mazda 5. Sometimes the Jimny wants a bit more. Yeah, because it just needs any way of making it more stable.

Jesus Christ, these high winds lately, I was like, get that thing off the road. Get that thing off the road. Don't put your daughters in those things. So, it swells a... When pressure hits 5.5 atmospheres, or 81 PSI... Tight. It goes, pop, and it shoots the... the spore packet.

Yark. Boom. And it shoots it out. Because it grows in the because it grows in the dung and it's got to spread and get out. You know, everything's evolved

plants and everything have evolved different ways of spreading their seeds or spores. So it shoots it out. It can shoot it up to 2.5 meters which is quite amazing given the size of it. It's tiny. It's tiny.

So it's technically not a spore spreader more of like a fungal artillery piece. And just shoot it. it out. Here's the other interesting thing. There's a parasite that jumps on top just before it shoots. It's a cattle lungworm, which is bad. It hits her ride. Yeah, it hitches a ride. When the pressure starts to build, I don't know if it's just worked it out. It's like, I could get on top of the saw it. Climbing it on top of it. And then when the cannon goes off, it's like, what?

And flies out and gets the other parts of the pasture, which can spread the lungworm problem. Interesting for fun this week. You didn't talk about your athletes for it all week. Yeah. I got some lame assault on that. Is it gone? Oh yeah, no, as soon as the lamassol's on, this isn't a paid mention for lamassil available at Chemist Warehouse, but that'll clear up athletes' foot right away. Yeah, it did, yeah.

Just athletes foot. It's just when I go from sort of a sand. I'm not sure. There's a cream that you can use. I think you want to get a specific, imaginable cream for your issue. I'm just like if you used it once and it was done. Pass it on. Just in case.

I don't put the tube straight on my foot. I'll put the ablacator on my toe and then really get in between the dogs. And the ablacator on my finger and really get it between the dogs. Out. So today's... Out of the show. So today's fact of the day is on top of a cow poohs, it's the fastest gun in the natural world,

a fungus that builds up 81 PSI before shooting its spores into the unknown. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do do do do do do do do. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. Play ZM's Flashphone and Haley. Last year, it was almost exactly a year ago, I guess, that we went to the radio awards

and I posted, honestly, one of the hottest photos of us as a trio at the after party, and I was roasted online after not realizing that I'd put this. Remember as the song? Oh, yeah, we never knew how it happened. What happened because I was drunk? uploading this photo.

Because Instagram will recommend you music. Recommend your music. And I chucked it up. Like that's one of the most attractive photos of the three of us, me in particular. That's why I put it up. And you can't change your music once it's up.

And you couldn't change the music once it's up. And then overnight it had all these likes and all of our lovely fans messaging and stuff. So I was like, it's funny to me. I'm still to leave it. So what a blunder. You'd learn your lesson. Fast forward a year.

And as you know, I had issues. If you've just joined the show, I'm Haley. I don't have a filter. I often overshed. If you have just joined us My TikTok I got banned from it And I couldn't be bothered dealing with the TikTok customer service

Which was so bad That I just deleted the account and started a new one I talked about it yesterday And I was like, hit me with a follow I'm going to start dumping all my stuff there And I've been trying to just do it really, really quickly To get the stuff up there And I've got four videos up so far

And one of them Where is it? One of them was this clip that I had made a few years ago about doing kegles. See if you notice something. Do you guys know what keegals are? You don't know what a hegel is? No, it's good.

This is a good learning moment. What's the music? Have you, do you? It's like that relaxing. I've put meditation music behind it. Oh, jeez. How did you do that? Is it one of those, why does it, when you upload something,

sometimes if it's got no music, it'll be like a suggested song. I know. Is that what's happened? I don't know because all the other clips right, they can see that it's just talking. And so with this one, and then it was one of our lovely listeners that said, Hon, did you mean to put sound over the video?

God, Mum. Bloody Auntie Haley's on social. I think you need to employ Shannon and pay her some money at the social media desk to be your manager because this is... But Shannon, she's absolutely boresing this up. Yeah, you know, I've done this a few times actually. Have you?

Yeah, because sometimes you'll... go to hit post and you go back a step and I think that's probably what you've done. That's what I did. The first time you did it, you wouldn't have seen the song and then maybe you just went back to check something and it'll be like, here's some music. Oh, but meanwhile, because you were saying to me,

you know, you've got to like the comments, you've got engaged with the comments. So I've already started getting that going a little bit. And now I'm like, do I just leave? You literally said it took you a day to find this out. I don't think you've been replying to comments. It's quite nice under this comedy. about doing delete it and repost it.

So the song, if you want to hear it, it's faint heart by Eden Gray. If you delete on TikTok, you can delete an archive, so it'll let you edit so you can take off the song. Oh, see, I do need to hire Shannon. You need to know a little bit more. I want to say this social media thing is just so far really harsh. Yeah, what's your hourly rate, Shannon, to be Haley's social media manager? I'll take some more non-olds. That was lovely this morning.

No, no. So hung up. Yeah, deal. Shut up, carwin, deal. How is your fame going on TikTok, though? Really bad. How many followers? So I walked away from nearly 4,000

because I couldn't be bothered with the admin of dealing with TikTok. 400. And I've really been pushing. It's really going badly, isn't it? It's going so badly. And my last account was in a co-lab post with Ursula Carlson that's had about 4 million views. I've deleted that.

So I messaged good friend Ersh, and I said, Pabts, can you co-lab with the new account? God, it's all coming across. But it's desperate, isn't it? I'm a ham Desperal. I don't want to get up at 4 o'clock in the morning anymore. I'm done.

So I said, can you co-lab with the new account? And she was like, no, that's not how twigs. Wow. Wow. So I'm not even writing the Ursula Carlson wave anymore. It's just... You're over. Good luck.

At Haynesprow comedy is doing so badly. I'm about to walk away again. Play ZM's Flashawn and Haley. Speaking of Ray, did you see? So she did a concert. It was a one-off. show, like a little pop-up show at New York's Blue Note Jazz Club, very famous club.

Oh, okay. Ray was there and she refused to sing that song because she woke up that morning, feeling too single to sing it, and then she dropped some pretty big news. I am refusing to write a single song until the album's

going to be called and then she fell in love. Yes. So in protest, until this moment finds me and you know I trust in the timing of life and whatever whatever but I'm not writing a single song for this album until that moment finds me

but personally it's going to be a very lovely album so she said that she's announced her third album's gonna be called and then she fell in love but until that moment happened she's like no more music I'm done she said she's finished with writing bitter songs about exes and bad dates and everything like that

she wants the next chapter to be purely positive Well, yeah, but then, you know, the realities of having a mortgage and having a record company contract will come into play and she'll just have to write it. Yeah, she will, but she's still looking for her husband. But I love that. She's like, no, in protest, I'm not doing it until the world sends me, my husband. I've asked nicely, where is he? The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.

Want to know now and you can call us 0800.m. You can text 9669. And you can dump yourself in too. That's fine. How useless was the new person at work? And, you know, if it was you, admit it. Maybe you press the wrong button and you cost the company lots of money.

Maybe you fibbed in your CV and actually you don't know how to do any of this stuff. Yeah. Like, did you see that there was an Air Canada pilot that didn't have a slots? And apparently he just had some like piece of laminated paper that he was flashing around everyone's like, sweet dude.

That's what that is. Have a good flight. He did know how to fly. Like he had other licenses but didn't have the official. He was flying like triple sevens. Well, he's saying, wasn't it? Four years. But so they've worked out in New Zealand and

Australia, $20,000 is what it costs you as a business if you hire the wrong person. Because of all their screw-ups, you know, the productivity, the, all of that. Re-advertising it when they're eventually. Retraining a new, like I had amazing was going to leave work and he was like, I just

want to, you know, pay a rise to keep out with inflation, they're like not. And he's like, you realize if I leave, you're going to have to train someone up. Yeah. And it's gonna... Do you really want to do that? Yeah, yeah. Is that like worth it for you?

Yeah. So... It was worth it to them? But that's the thing. Do they fire? No, no. Oh, okay. Interesting.

Not quite the payrolls of one, but... Yeah, right, right, right. Got a little. So I thought this morning, yeah, could we take some calls and texts? How useless was the new hire at work? And if that new hire was you, and you can admit it, bonus points. Did you get the ball rolling with some Instagram responses? Yes.

Because we asked there. Sam said, refuses to make phone calls all. all communications that's through text or email. You just want to talk to them on the phone and get an answer, but they won't. A new lady in her 40s and 50s had to ask for instructions on how to sweep. What?

Sweep. It's in the word. Using a broom. Yeah, it's in the word, you sweep. You sweep. Also, have you never seen it? A movie or? Yeah.

Did you sweep? I mean, you just wouldn't even think in a job interview to ask if someone can sweep. We assume you can sweep. what? Can you sweep? We're to last start here at the freezing where she took her lunch into the boning room to eat. Oh, no, that's... No, you don't want to be eating in the boning room.

You don't have been voting. Well, not that type of boning. What are we boning in the boning room? We're deboning in the boning in the boating room. Have we got one? No, we don't have. We're to have a wellness room that you can cry in, but you're not about a bone in the wellness room. Are you not? Tell that to Fletch. Well, it made me well. Did you bone in the wellness room? It made me well, didn't that? It did make you well. Thank you.

It's very good for you. No, there's a boning room in the... This is a completely different meaning. Oh, the meat works. I work in a place where things need to be stored in alphabetical order, and I knew hire didn't know the alphabet's order. No. That's not true. You can't, A, B, C, G, G, P, C, because they all rhyme.

Exactly. Do they all right with E. B, C, D, E, G. Z. Okay, well, T, T, T, T, V. Don't get me started on V. O-800, Diles at M. Give us a call.

How useless was the new. person at work. I feel like this is a joke, but I love it, so I'm going to read it out anyway. Got a big roarie energy. Rory messages and some one-liners for the final topics. In a job interview once, the boss asks me if I could perform under pressure. I said I'm not a big queen fan, but if it gets me the job, I'll give it a go. I like that.

That is good stuff. Alex, how bad was the new person at work? Pretty bad. Okay, like what happened? Give it to us. It's my parents. They were dairy farmers. They owned a dairy farm.

And my family's dutch, so quite often we'd get, like, work experience, people out from Holland. You get the woofers, eh? Yeah. Whiffers are there worldwide internet. Something, something workers. It's like a program, right, where you can volunteer on farms and live. And the duchies love it because it's bloody cheap labour. Oh, no, these ones do get paid as well.

But one of them had a mate that wanted to come out with him. Oh, yeah. And the mate was not so into farming. and he was actually a mechanic but he just wanted to come to New Zealand and they were going to travel around as well for a bit. And anyway, it got to the weekend and I just started on Monday or whatever

and it got to the weekend and he was like, what? The cows need milked on the weekend. And he was... I told him to work on the weekend. Yeah, the cows stop. They don't stop. They don't adhere to our calendars, do they?

No, I'm afraid to twist their nips and they're like, right, lock off for the weekend, lock off. Lock off until Monday. Wow. Okay, so how long did they stay on the farm then? having to work seven days a week? Nah, not long.

I think he lasted two weeks and then he started a mechanic gig. Yeah, to be working seven days a week. Because the cars don't need to be milked on the weekends when you're a minute. No, you get the weekends off as a mechanic. Alex, thank you. How useless was the new person at work?

I dropped 200 pallets onto my fork for like a week into the new job, so I'm waiting for someone to message it about me, actually. I'm a bit useless. Says Matthew. I faked it until I didn't make it as a technical data analyst. Just absolutely had no idea how to be. an analyst.

New hire would call in sick every single week. In the six months, she was there. She maybe did one or two full weeks of work. Yeah. And we all only did four days as it was. Oh, useless. Yeah. I worked at a garden centre,

had a teacher guy, how to turn on a hose. What? Not a fancy nozzle. Just the tap where you plug into the wall. Like, you could figure that out yourself, eh? Holy, yeah, you could. Lefty Lucy, Brabs.

The worst employer I had, sat in his role for three months, did nothing, kept pushing appointment. out and then left one day who just wasn't coping. Cost us in excess of $50,000 and he left six months ago, we're still discovering stuff-ups. He decided working full-time

just wasn't for him. I don't like working full-time either, babes, but you've got to pay the bills. Some people seem to be allergic to work. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm addicted. I have to take a pill every morning for my allergies for work. What do they call those pills? A concrete pill.

Nah, the one... heart in the... No, the... Valgae's pills. Anti-histamines. Pop one of those as well. Anti-histamine, yeah. Can we talk about you taking Viagra before work?

I'm sick of looking at it. It opens up the heart. Yeah, no, it opens up everything, and I can see it. Steering at me. I had a lady I used to work with, and she couldn't understand why a black and white photo wouldn't scan into a computer in color when she selected color on the print. Oh, my God. We had a guy who was on a work placement program who was so useless and dangerous to have on site.

We gave him the job of hand washing the rocks outside the workshop. instead. Good though, those rocks with dirty ass. It's always good to have a clean rock. Yeah. God, there's so many. Almost every day I have to explain to the new hire how to copy and paste. So click, click, highlight, pull and drag,

release, right click, copy. It's going to blow their mind when they learn the keyboard shortcut for that. My boss is all-see. Shift C, control C. My boss has really checked qualifications and often took people at their word, big mistake. One employee claimed to be qualified in goat health.

but lack the knowledge on how to look after sick animals when an animal got sick it would have, it had pat his head and be like, they're there, there. Oh, yeah, there there, that's great. That just makes me feel better if I'm sick and someone pat's my head and says, they're there.

We've had three messages in from people who have worked with people that didn't know the alphabet. Yeah. Really? I mean, I understand there's like dyslexia and those sorts of like learning difficulties that people experience. But they're saying didn't know it.

They just didn't know it. Wow. Yeah. Would that be if English isn't your first language? Oh, yeah, maybe, maybe, which is fine. Yeah. But if you're a pharmacist and you're, oh, if you're a pharmacist and you're, sorry, career delivery, just got some nice new bedding.

If you're a pharmacist and you're looking for, like, names and medications, it would really slow everything down, which has lost money. We've got a Labor hire start with us. The first day he called in and he said he just mentally wasn't ready to come back to the workforce yet, so we need a sick-back. That's pretty good stuff. Jeez. Play Z-N's Flesh,

Worn and Haley. So there's been these like townhouses on the way into my little suburb and they've sat there empty The Great Unfinished. It's a great unfinished project of apparently pre-COVID times

Just sat there But underneath was all storefronts And I was getting very excited about the idea of like business as being in there Because currently in my in my little shop thing We've got a vape shop, a dairy

Now an Op Shop Because Hitton's dairy's gone Wild, wild, wild that you get a vape shop. It's one of the first shops to... Gotta get it. Got to get it. Got to get it.

You know, I've got a new shop before you tell us about your new shop. Please. Why you're jumping? I'm happy to make space. No, I'm just saying... Because I know what your new shop is. Yeah. Hapunan.

Hapunan. That's our shop. That's our... Yeah, so... But do you know what? That they've put it in the laundromat. So when I go to dry my sheets, I get a whiff... You've got a beautiful Filipino chicken.

I get a whiff of the Filipino chicken. Are they sharing an extractive fan? Well, they're sharing the same building. A little linton laugh. It's like a pop-up at the end, but the door is in the laundromat, so you get a whiff. What? I know. The door is in the laundromat.

Yeah. Yeah, it's like a hole in the wall. When you look down from Fletcher's apartment, it's that big wrap-around, billboard and stuff. Yeah. It's in that little corner down there. Why don't you just give out my address, you know? You know, so when you go up his street. And his code.

And his apartment number on floor. But yeah, it's so, like, you're up in a reburger. Oh, okay. Yeah. Where? Yeah. And that old real estate building. This is the weirdest conversation to be having publicly.

No, I know, I know. No, people get excited when a new business. Oh, we love it. I love when there's a empty shop. And all of a sudden there's some paper in the window. I'm like something's happening here. And think for like eight years these have sat empty and then there's paper on the windows.

Those townhouses have been empty forever. I'm surprised they'd be able. I know. Let's chat about this over a beer this afternoon. Okay. Anyway, so paper in the window, things are coming, things are coming and then there's a little sign and it says like bakery

coming and I was like we don't have a bakery we've got a nice cafe but not like a pie and a V and a slice. A quick stop. So it was up on the local community page and everyone was getting excited for it and then they started posting as well. You don't know what's going into

a shop or a spot and everybody in the local page starts speculating. Well I was talking to Sharon and her cousins at the council of course and they said it's going to be a new vape shop. So it opened yesterday and I drove past and it was packed to the rafters.

Really? And I'm doing a little diet at the moment I thought I'll pop in and get a savoury just to try the thing. Too crowded. I couldn't be bothered. Right. And then so I got on the local community page. Caroline says just had a great donut from the new bakery and cafe open to date. Lovely

service with a smile. I thought I'll keep rena. Mate, I just tried the steak and cheese pie. Delicious hot and actually really cheesy. See this is good and bad news. isn't it? Just bought a huge cream donut, delicious, pies look tempting.

I just got two meat savories. Very nice. Just had a message in about that bakery. Rory went for a job at that bakery, but by the time he got there, the roll had been filled. Oh, no, Rory. It's so terrible.

It's good. The role had been filled. Rory give us one more. I know when Rory messages and jokes, he's become a bit of a show regular later. He always put his name in brackets at the end. Which I appreciate. We need to get Rory's name saved in the system.

Thank you, Rory. One wine of Rory. First pie I've had in years. It actually had cheese in it. Great pies. Okay, so we decided this was a cooking little pile. What was the item that keeps dragging you back to the bakery? Because for me, a bakery, that's a pie.

That's a mince and cheese pie. Yeah. No. Mincing cheese pie, maybe a lilly slice. Maybe if I'm going somewhere and I need a pack lunch, chicken salad sandwich. It's always a slice. Chicken cab on the stick. No.

I love getting that nasty deep-fried crumb chicken thing on the stick with a stick. with a stick sauce. Oh, yeah. And you bite it and it goes, oh, sausage roll more than a pie at a bakery for me, but we ask you what keeps you coming back.

I'm just going to rattle through the responses. Cream donut, cream donut, club sandwiches, the only place you've eaten a club sandwiches when you get one from the bakery. Stake and cheese pie and a cream donut. My bakery makes the best

bacon, mince and triple cheese pies. Cream donuts, cream. It's got to be mock cream. It's got to be mock cream. Don't give me that real cow stuff. No, no, no, no, no. And a little jam dollop.

Yeah, oh, yeah, to make it look like a cherry. Dolip. Dolip. Someone said almond croissant. That's bougie. That's a cafe. That's a cafe. That's a cafe.

Or that's sort of a, a patisserie or something like that. No, this is a classic V in the fridge bakery. Someone said whatever the nana slices. Yeah. And totally, like, there's always a nana slice. A lolly. Yeah, a belgium. Mincent cherry pie.

Some of it's a custard pie. Raspberry twist. Ooh. Raspberry twist. Someone said cream donut, got to be fake cream. Can't go with them out of minced cheese pie and a white monster? A white monster. I think I'm going to go to the gym after work and I'm going to bust my ass

because I'm going to stop by and get it. I'm going to try the mints and cheese. That's your classic. For me, that's the marker. Somebody said you can't go into a bakery without one sweet, one savory. That's the rule. If you get a pie, you've got to have a little sweet. I had a custard square last week.

Slapped. I wonder if they've got a caramel slice. Or they'll have a cuss. Or every bakery has a caramel slice. If it looks good, I'll bring it in a few flesh. Geez, God, I don't think we've had a quick little poll With this many responses I'll say, love in the audience today

Each time I click, it's a 10 per page response, listen You're clicking a lot I don't know if people can hear that, but Because people just want pies, mate But overwhelmingly, what would you say If you had to do a, like a cream donut? Cream donut, it's a winner Okay, today I'm going to get, I'm going to have to go pretty hard at the gym

But I'm going to make space I've literally just finished breakfast mince and cheese paw Yep Cream diner The classic It's Friday The calories don't count

Play ZNs Flash warn and Haley This is really Interesting This study And that's the only reason I would never share Something uninteresting

With our listener The surprising link Here's the name of the study The surprising link Between a woman's body size And her jealousy levels I was like Color me intrigued

I'm in I don't know if I could even comment On this It just feels like a minefield Read lightly Yes but then you think you read that and you think oh yeah but then I read the study and I was like huh because I maybe I would say in this society that values smaller or slimmer bodies maybe bigger

or heavier bodies would be more jealous because they may be feeling a little bit like oh you know I don't look like the way that society wants me to yes not the finding okay a new study found that women rate more feminine voices as more jealousy inducing so that hear voices in this study hear them, the more feminine voices were more jealousy-inducing, my God, I can't say the word, jealousy-inducing, but how jealous they got depended on their own body size, and actually taller and slimmer women felt more jealous

when a rival's voice sounded more feminine compared to shorter or heavier women. Oh. Because they've got what other people want, but there's one thing they don't have, they want it more. Threat detectors. Yeah. Isn't this, it literally goes back.

to like an evolutionary thing that here's the theory that they got. So the test was done with a bunch of women and a whole bunch of recordings of other women and it was women simply saying, hi. And then they were rated on how jealous

they'd feel if that voice was flirting with their partner. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hello. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Yeah, the voice. So the more feminine sounding voices were more jealousy inducing obviously. But the thing that would change is the size of the woman

who was doing the experiment. And the theory was that tall or slimmer women have a higher perceived mate value as societally more acceptable and more alluring. So they become evolved to be more sensitive to threats because they're like, I'm the one, I'm getting shagged, right? Yeah, I'm going to get, I'm going to be shag.

Look at me. I'm tall and slim. I'm getting shagged one way or another. Hey, hang on, who are you? And they got way more jealous. So they've got more to lose if their partner was to get seduced, say, by this voice. I just thought this research was like so bizarre. So they did like pitch and vocal resonance to determine femininity level. So hi, as opposed to like, hi, which is like way more feminine.

And they said that just doing that with one single word being hi was a, to evoke different emotions. Wow, okay. But I can't believe, I'm like, who even, this is from a Chinese university, who even comes up with a study like this? When you're like looking at... Probably someone who's just been cheated on.

It's weird that you're saying like the feminine voice, but if you think of all like the sexy, sexy, you know, voices of black celebrities, they're always, the females ones are always a bit gravely. Are you Emma Stones, your Scarlet Johansons? Yes, your aunt, Cass, it's been a dary's. No, no, no, you've gone too far. I think you've become a man as well.

Okay, if you had to rate, review or marry, Fletch, Vaughn or Haley, what one would it be? Okay, I would marry Haley. I would have sex. Wait, which one is it? No, no, no, no, it's only rate, review, marry. Oh, okay. No comment.

Have sex with the podcast, I don't know how they would work. Give us a sexy little review, though. Thank you.