ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 13th March, 2025

Episode Date: March 12, 2025

On todays episode of Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod NASA News Top cities for eating World kidney day Where NZ stands on the misery index Top 6 science jokes SLP - Do you like mint in your milkshakes Hayley toilet roll Bad news Brad The Vent Instagram's new blend feature Changing Vaughan's Bitmoji  Fact of the day What stores just get you going See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years, in the 1970s, the Mr Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of play. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Then he just pulled out a gun, shot her in the back of the head, and then said to Wayne, you're going to help me bury her. This is Mr Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify,

or wherever you get your podcasts. From the ZM Podcast Network, this is Flesh, Fawn and Hayley's Big Pod. Brought to you by Chemist Warehouse, the biggest brands at the lowest prices. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. Thank you, Bryn. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. Thank you, Bryn. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

Happy Thursday. Happy Friday, Eve. What a pleasure it is to join all of you. A secret sound coming up at seven this morning and eight. Those are your chances during our show to have a guess. Win the cash thanks to Super Liquor. Listen out for those activators. I do want it to go on our show.

I know that's selfish. You just love giving away lots of money. I do. Particularly when it doesn't cost me a dollar. We're going to start the show next with some good news. Yeah. Feels like we need it.

Some good news. Yeah. Because also later in the show, we're going to let people have a vent, which may turn sort of negative. Yeah. Well, not negative, but you know what I mean?

Get something off your chest. Also, yeah, we've got Bad News Brad coming in. Oh, gosh. Our favourite economist. We just love him. A genuine friend. Yeah. And we've asked for your questions.

Maybe you've got a, I don't know, a question about, I don't know, what's going on at the moment. Well, a few things have changed, right, since the last time we talked to Brady, economically. Trump. Economically. Trump. That happened. Well, yeah, our Kiwi savers have gone down. Interest rates continue to drop a little bit.

So, yeah, it'll be good. I'm guessing it'll be more bad news from him then. Hence the name. We're not changing the title yet. One day we'll get to call him Good News Brad. Yeah. One day. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Who remember are Sunita Williams and Butch Wilmore, Vaughn and Hayley. I remember Sunita Williams and Butch Wilmore. No, I don't remember. I do remember. They are the astronauts. They're the NASA astronauts that went up. Astronauts.

And then they couldn't get down. And they've been like getting all thin and like atrophy. Is that what it's called? When your muscles don't have enough. Astronauts do have suits and exercise to sort of accommodate for it, but more short term.

Yeah, they're not designed to be up there for that long. Ten months. Far out. Ten months on the International Space Station. It's not the record for time in space, is it? No, dude. We talked to him, remember? Yeah.

The twin guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And then they researched the twin who stayed on Earth. Yeah, they compared them. It was like the perfect scenario. So it was supposed to be a 10-day mission and has turned into a 10-month mission.

I've not packed enough undies. I know. You wouldn't be organised. How do you wash your knickers in space? How many tampons have you got? Surely the International Space Station has a dispenser. Yeah, surely. That gets filled up by the people.

Yeah. They come around, they clean out the bin, they fill up the dispenser. But do your undies stink in space? Because you're not exercising, or would you be sweating that much? Do your undies stink in space? One of this generation's greatest philosophical questions.

You still have natural body expulsion. Yeah, and they have the astronaut. We should have asked the question. They have to exercise to avoid the muscle wastage. How do they wash their undies in space? Good question for Google, that one. Yeah, astronauts don't wash their clothes, including underwear, in space

due to the sacred scarcity of water and the need for conservation. They wear their clothes until they are unusable and then throw them out. But if you think you're going for 10 days, I've only brought enough undies. Yeah, you wouldn't. And we must, in trying to get an interview, to ask the big questions. Yeah. The Crew 9 is the one that's up there at the moment,

including Williams and Wilmore. Yeah. But Nick Haig and Alexander Gruborovnov as well, they are not going to be able to come back until Crew 10 arrive. Can't be unmanned, you see. Right. So Crew 10 are departing Earth on March 12, and then on March 16, Crew 9 will undock.

Right. And prepare to return to Earth. So it's March 13 today. So it's March 12 today in the US where they'll take off. But then, yeah, they've got to get there and the others have got to leave. So it'll be in a few days' time. So many questions. Also, menstruation in space.

How old's this woman? That's a good question. She doesn't look that young. But so if you are going to space, the idea is usually... She's 59 years old. Okay, so she might be safe. She might have menopause. Because she might have menopause.

Oh my God, imagine if she went into the menopause. She was having the hot flushes on the space station. You don't crank a window. Because usually if you're in space and you're of menstrual age, you would go on the oral contraceptive pill and you would skip the sugar pill so that you didn't get one. But if you went for 10 days and you've taken a month's supply. Jeepers.

Oh my god, they don't wash their clothes in space. So this new crew will stay there and the people will take their capsule back down to Earth. Feels like we're robbing Peter to pay Paul. But they've always got people in the space station. Right, so how are they getting home?

It's not normally this long that they're kept there. No. Because there have been problems, right? Is that why they haven't been able to get them? Yeah, that's why they go stuck there. And then, of course, the crew's coming up. They've had to wait for one that has the space to take them down. So she has spent, just on her Wikipedia page, a fascinating woman.

A fascinating woman. She has spent, and you've got to click refresh for it to update, 601 days, 19 hours, and 28 minutes in space. In total. In total of her entire life. No thanks. I'm good. I'd go up for like a little. So sure.

Yeah, I'd go up to the edge of space and come down. Yeah, have a looky-po. I'd be down for that. Extra vehicular activity, which means spacewalks. She's done nine spacewalks and been outside in space for a total of 62 hours. Oh, no. But if you were inside the space station,

you'd get used to it. Yeah. And then you'd be like, shit, I'll go outside. Like, it's a small space. She's been up there for 10 months. You'd be like, yeah, I'll go outside. You want to have a stretch. Have a stretch.

Yeah. Imagine being out there. Spacewalks, it's a no. Yeah. Imagine being out there. Spacewalks. It's a no from me. No. Yuck. We're not supposed to be out there. She's badass.

She's logged more than 3,000 flight hours in her military career in more than 30 different aircraft types. Wow. It's going to be ongoing, right? The higher risk of cancer and brain damage from being in space. For that long? Why? Don't know. I mean, it's got a whole other break in it, you know, to talk about it

because there's so many health issues. Rapid heartbeat, severe vision problems. You and I, qualified doctors, might leave old Dumbo here behind. This is why I wanted to pause. I was trying to be soft about it. You were trying to be, I do apologise. I don't have the bedside manner that you do. No, I know, and that's why my patients enjoy my...

I forget that you're doctors. I'm sorry. You're a Meredith Grey. I'm a house type. You are. I just can't give it to them straight. That's right. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

World's best city for food has been named. Okay. Not New Zealand. We don't have any cities? Nah, I don't think we're even anywhere near the top. I've got the top ten. Have you had to say the best city in New Zealand for food? Oh, good question. Christchurch.

Oh, yeah. Christchurch is very good. Queenstown? Queenstown. Queenstown, very expensive. Like, you've got all your bougie restaurants, but then you've also got like, food burger. Your Cheap Bits, your Margos, your Foodburgs. Yeah. I mean, Wellington's got classic. I hope they racially profile me.

Yeah, me too. I'll go there. Don't fire the person who makes the funny racist jokes. No. I want to see what they say about me. Potato eating Irish man. Auckland has become the home of Al Brown, but it was always Logan Brown and Wellington

was like one of the top restaurants. I would have said Wellington had this wrapped a little while ago, but I reckon Christchurch, post-earthquake, Christchurch is... Well, you can say Fifth Street. We love a Fifth Street. But there's that end of things,

but then like because of the mobility of it, they got the good food truck. And then the Riverside Market. The Riverside Market. Oh, yes. See, Auckland's too spread out. And the strip there. Well, nothing in New Zealand makes the list. No. Excuse me.

You're alright. Okay, so here's your top ten. Jakarta and Indonesia is top ten Indonesian food. Never been. Yum. I've never been to Jakarta. What is Indonesian food? Is it like... Like mee goreng and delicious noodles and rice and nasi goreng.

Yeah, but I'm on the street. I don't have... I've got to do it while I'm moving. I don't have the... What do you mean? Oh, you can't eat rice or noodles? Yes, you can. Indonesian street food.

Okay, there's lots of like kebab situations. Oh, yes. Okay. Yum. Okay, that's good. I'm on board with that. Okay, number nine, Paris in France. You know, you've got more like fine dining, I reckon.

Yeah. French cuisine, delish. How good's a French butter? Yum. Number eight is Shanghai. Wow, I would have gone New Zealand butter over. Yeah, I like New Zealand butter. You traitorous bitch.

I like a French butter. It's less intense. Wow. It's less intense. Oh, you like a white butter. White butter. When you go overseas It's less intense? Oh, you like a white butter. White butter. When you go overseas and butter's real white, you're like, what is this? What have you done?

What have you done to the butter? Yeah, where's the yellow? Shanghai and China. I've never been. Aaron's been. Yeah, food's amazing. Really? Food is amazing.

The only thing in Shanghai that you have to be careful for is if you go drinking with an elder, it's disrespectful to say no to a drink. Do you know this culture in Shanghai? No. Is this China on a whole or just Shanghai? Maybe. Well, I just know it from Aaron. If someone takes you out to dinner and they're hosting you

and they offer you a drink, if you say no, it's incredibly rude. Really? And so you'll see all these young Chinese businessmen on the train home blackout. Because they've been trying to keep up with their managers and their elders. Right. Very funny. Okay.

Lagos. Lagos and Nigeria. Okay. Good food there. Great food. What does Nigerian food consist of? Give us a little rundown of Nigerian food. There's a lot of rice-based dishes.

Yeah, yeah. Nigerian food. Ethiopian food. I've seen Ethiopian restaurants as well and browsed the menu and thought that sounds pretty good. Curries and such. Does this take into account the local cuisine or just amazing restaurants

in that city? I think it's taken into account both, like the amount of good restaurants there, the amount of variety there. Okay, so not necessarily local. But it is talking about the actual cuisine of the place. Right. I don't know, maybe it's a mix.

Okay, Mexico is number six. Oh, yeah, great food there. Oh, yeah. I love a California burrito. Number five. You know I love the mix part of Tex-Mex. Oh, my gosh. The Tex and the mix. And Tex-Mex. Oh, my gosh. The Tex and the mix.

And Tex-Mex. Yeah. Okay, here's your top five. Madrid, Spain. Oh, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Tapas. Tapas.

Tapas. Tapas. Is it Paella? Is it Spanish or is it Portuguese? Yeah, there's some. Well, I'm probably sure there's both. But Tapas, Paella and Spain for sure. Number four, Cape Town.

Oh, really? My hometown. Where you parked the car. That's right. We parked the car. Number four, Cape Town. Oh, really? My hometown. Where you parked the car. That's right. We parked the car, go eating in Cape Town. Well, I'm actually from Janisburg, but I do like to visit.

Number three, and you've been here very recently, Medellin and Colombia. Okay, interesting. Where did you find the food? This is top three in the world. Well, no, that's the thing. I wouldn't say Colombian food

is my favourite food because it's a lot of, like, I don't know, beans and rice and meat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, like, I wouldn't say Colombian food is my favorite food because it's a lot of like, I don't know, beans and rice and meat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like the restaurants in Medellin are amazing. Yeah, there's some incredible food.

So that's what makes me think this list is more amazing restaurants than it is local cuisine. Yeah, places to visit to go to good restaurants. Empanadas? What? Empanadas? Yeah. Arepas. Yes.

Arepas. Yeah. But yeah, I would say It's more restaurant Because there are Incredible restaurants there You're top two And this is one of my Favourite places

If not my favourite place In the entire world Bangkok, Thailand Oh my god yeah Bangkok's pretty good Thai food is just amazing Thai food's amazing What I love is that

There's really really Fancy restaurants in Bangkok But you could also Just go to a street vendor And pay a dollar And it's so delicious. It's so yum. Now number one in the world, best cities to visit for food, New Orleans,

USA. I was expecting Hanoi, Vietnam in this list. Because the street food there and the food there. The food there is amazing. New Orleans, so if you think about restaurants, you look at that lovely Creole food and big boy laps.

I couldn't live there because I'd straight up die. But like gumbo, po' boys. Gumbo, yeah. It would be next level. And the serving sizes are big because it's America. Yeah. The bourbons. Oh, yeah, the food is outrageous there.

I've never been. This was such a stupid break because I'm hungry and I'm in New Zealand. Sorry about that. Sitting here, not overseas. No Indian representation on the list. Yeah, that's a break because I'm hungry and I'm in New Zealand. Sorry. Sitting here not overseas. No Indian representation on the list. Yeah, that's a crime. I thought we might have got a sort of South Asian, not South Asian. But I think Indian cuisine is amazing.

But maybe India or like a city like New Delhi wouldn't have the best restaurants. There's not one city that captures enough of it. Yeah. Okay. Starving to death. Yeah. Play Zed-Ems, Flashborn and Hayley. Things I've never looked into.

Do you know, so I had a kidney surgery when I was nine years old and as a result, I don't know much about it. Do you know what I mean? Because I was a kid and it just was not.

Didn't ask too many questions. Don't you don't ask too many questions. I had lots of people asking me like, oh, does it impact how you process alcohol? I was like,

I've got to say as a nine year old they didn't tell me. They didn't tell you that information. Yeah, we're talking kidneys because it's Kidney Health Month. You know everyone's got a month. Congratulations.

Born Happy Kidney Health Month to you. To both yours and my one. Your one. My one and a nub. There's a bit there. Did they leave a nub? There's like a bit there. It's sort of all shriveled up and does nothing.

It's like a little dried bean. Think your dried beans, you know, that you would have to hydrate overnight. So it's Kidney Health Month and the Kidney Society of New Zealand want us to know this is happening. It's the 1st to 3rd 1st of March. And I was just looking up because people ask me all the time. I had this kidney surgery. I had chronic urine infections like fortnightly as a kid.

Oh, wow. Every fortnight I'd be like, oh, God, here we go again. And I had to take this medicine and you know, like I know the flavour to my soul. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was like an orange essence. Oh, was it a yum one? It was milky, thick milky and orange flavoured. And it was so

bad. And I remember I had a doctor that was like, she's just holding on when she needs to go to the toilet. Naughty. And I was in all this pain and stuff and they just kept, you know, antibiotics. And then one day I went to the doctor and it was a substitute doctor,

like just someone filling in. And she was like, why is she here every fortnight? There's something wrong. We're going to, yeah, there's a bigger problem here. There's a question. There's a question.

They sent me off and there was a blockage in the tube between my bladder and kidney and then there was just no life force getting to the kidney. It was essentially dead. Oh. And that's what it was causing it. What a blockage in the tube between my bladder and kidney and then there was just no life force getting to the kidney. It was essentially dead. Oh. And that's what was causing it.

What did they do in the surgery? Removed the blockage, but as a result, the kidney itself, which was never removed. When I say I've got one kidney, it's just easier to explain. Yeah. It just had no...

No life to it. No life to it. It was like something that got... The blockage, it would be like if you put a really tight tie around your little finger and your finger just eventually shrivels. So you've got a shriveled up kidney and a normal kidney. And a massive left kidney, which is so fun.

And that's normal. I was just reading, like, what are the side effects of having one functioning kidney? She's got a hung kidney. Big hung kidney. She's hung. Like, when I get scans, every now and then, if I have a scan on my ovaries with an ultrasound thing, I'm like, check out the kidney. She's hung. Like when I get scans, every now and then if I have like a scan on my ovaries with like an ultrasound thing, I'm like, check out the kidney.

She's a whopper. And it just genuinely becomes engorged because it's doing the job of two kidneys. So I have no side effects of having one kidney. I just have a really hardworking kidney. Because what are the normal side effects of having one kidney? The normal side, there aren't really. It's like if you have one one the body's very intelligent. The issue would lie if I had a

problem with my good kidney. Right. Then I'd need one of yours. Ah, Vaughan would step up. I'm pretty sure Vaughan would step up. Vaughan? But he's got kids. That's what I was about to say. I've got to hold on to mine in case one of my children need them. You can't. What if my cat needs my kidney? The cat would eat your kidney.

Fletch, give me one of your kidneys. Go on. Go on. You hardly even use it. But what if I need the other one? Well, then you could ask someone else. It's a trickle effect. Oh, it's a, okay, yeah.

It's a pyramid scheme of sorts. Yeah. So, but this is. No, I would happily give you a kidney. Imagine if you, like, needed a kidney and you did all the tests and stuff and the only person you matched with was your unhealthiest friend that smoked, drank too much. Yeah, didn't take care of themselves.

And you're like, oh, is there a better kidney? So what I had is different to kidney disease. That 550,000 New Zealanders live with some kind of kidney condition. Kidney disease has been the worst. You see people on dialysis. It can really impact them. It can be very dangerous. So it's just a thing to be aware of.

It's Kidney Month, and if you want to donate, text KIDNEY to 3493. It makes a $3 donation. Play ZM's Fleshborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fleshborn and Hayley. It's quite funny they've called this a misery index because there's often those, you you know like who's the happiest and it's always like Denmark. Yeah

the Nordic Scandinavian. The Scandi countries because of the nice furniture. Nice easy furniture. We're getting an Ikea this year. Are we going to get happier? We're going to be way happier. I thought making Ikea furniture made people miserable and it was more about their

sort of flatter way of living between rich and poor. The gap is smaller and you know better quality of living and their prisons are better and their justice system is better. Even their prisons are like fun camps. I'm like lock me up. Do you know what I mean? Like a little mental health

break away. Yeah. Misery business. Great concert. It was a great concert. It was a great concert. That made me not miserable. So let's see if it raised the score. This one's less about this.

It's more of an economic index that they've sort of given a chipper name, the misery index. Right. And how do we do? Based on how we are recovering from the pandemic. Yeah. What we want to know is where are we and have we been in Australia? Okay.

Like how it is basically to live in New Zealand in this economy. It's calculated by inflation plus unemployment. Right. Okay, so it's not going to be good. Our inflation's dropped right down, but our employment's quite high. It's over 5% now. We've got bad news Brad later in the show. Which is going to be good.

He's going to answer all your questions that you've given us. Okay, so out of 162 miserable countries, we're the 88th most miserable. Smack bang in the middle, really, isn't it? That's pretty grim, eh? That's bad. That's grim. So one is the worst.

162 is the best. This is an improvement. So it is getting better. You2 is the best. This is an improvement. So it is getting better. You went to have got that Ikea. I just think Ikea is going to fix a lot of this. If we were to ask people in Denmark and Switzerland and Norway and Sweden and all that, why are they so happy? Cold? Fish paste?

If it was Family Feud and you were going up against 100 Scandinavians to try to find the most popular answer, Ikea is going to be a surefire bet. It might not be number one, but it's going to be three or four. All the meatballs. Yeah. But isn't the whole thing with Ikea, is Ikea cheap? I don't know. Not like Kmart cheap, but it's cheap?

No, I don't think it's Kmart cheap. No, it's not Kmart cheap. No. Kmart cheap, like it's its own thing? Yeah. It's like, how is it that cheap? But surely if we- China. Yeah cheap? Like it's it's own thing? Yeah. It's like how is it that cheap? China. Yeah I think it's China. But that's a miserable

the people who work in those factories. Do we beat China? On the misery index? No I don't think so. So it's our unemployment that pushes us up so high. Right. Because our inflation is down to 2% and our unemployment's at 5.1.

Whereas Australia has lower unemployment but higher inflation. But... Wait, do we beat Australia? Nah. No. Oh, that's why everyone's moving there. 6.5 and we're 7.3. Although all the Goldie Beach has been swept away.

So that's probably pushed them. So add that to your misery score. Yeah. Our beaches are not, ours are just full of human crap, you know? No, but it might be good for them because they might have to employ more people to fix the beach. So then their employment will go down. Unemployment

will go down. I don't know how these things work. I don't know how the economy functions. Next year, guys. Next year, New Zealand will beat them. Yeah, work harder, please. We'll make Australia more miserable. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. From your local community Facebook page,

this is the Top 6 Suspicions. Well, good morning to you. If you're a scientist, apparently if you're funnier, it makes you more likeable and sadly more credible. People are more likely to believe you if you're a wacky scientist. I would have just believed someone who's a scientist, like, I don't know.

Based on their qualifications from a recognised facility. Humour does make everything much more palatable. That's why my whole life is a joke. People like, I know that Neil, what's his name? Neil Grassi to Tyson. Oh, yes. Who's that other science guy? Is it Bill? Bill Nye the science guy. He just got married.

Yeah. I assume Bill Nye the science guy must have already been married. But that's why people like them because they are obviously very intelligent but also can have a bit of personality, have a bit of humour. It makes it more palatable, doesn't it? Yeah.

Layman's terms for the dum-dums. Study found that scientists use humour, especially a mix of anthropomorphism, which is basically giving, like, human qualities to something that's not human. Right. And satire they perceived as more likeable in their messages as legitimate sources of scientific information,

keeping it lighthearted and a well-executed humor. Enhance the engagement. So the next pandemic we have, we need some comedians dressed as scientists so we all believe it. Stay at home, stay at home. Just being silly gooses. Just being silly gooses. Well, I've got the top six jokes to make scientists more likeable.

I've scoured the internet. Okay. I asked ChatGBT. Still their weakest point. Yeah, their humor. Humose is, well, I've got the top six jokes to make scientists more likeable. I've scoured the internet. Okay. I asked ChatGBT. It's still their weakest point. Yeah, their humour. Humour is still the weakest point. Number six on the list of the top six jokes to make science more likeable. What do you do with a sick chemistry professor?

What do you do? Helium. What do you do if they die? What? Barium. Yeah, great, great. That's too far down the periodic table. Yeah, I didn't.

I didn't. She's never heard of barium. I know H2O and that's it. All right. H2Go? Yeah, great, great. That's too far down the periodic table. Yeah, I didn't. She's never heard of barium. I know H2O and that's it. All right. H2Go? That's that one. I know that one. The water bottle.

I know the water and the air. Yeah, good boy. Thank you. The water and the air. Yeah. Oh, we've got a smart boy. We've got a smart boy. All right.

It's two things we need. We've got two doctors and just a silly goose. Number five on the list of the top six jokes to make scientists more likeable. A photon walks into a hotel and just a silly goose. Number five on the list of the top six jokes that make scientists more likeable. A photon walks into a hotel and asks for a room. Front desk says, any luggage? Photon says, me? Nah, I'm travelling light.

I get it. Photons can travel at light speed. Yeah, obviously I knew that. Yeah, duh. I was waiting for Fletch to laugh because I was going to give him space to make him feel like he got it first. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, that's fair enough. Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just don't want you to feel dumber than you already are. Number four on the list of the top six jokes that make him feel like he got it first. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that's fair enough. Thank you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just don't want you to feel dumber than you already are. Number four on the list of the top six jokes that make scientists more likeable. Hey guys, you know you can't trust Adams. They make up everything.

Oh, yeah. That's good. That's good. I get that. Simple. Simple. Well, here's the test for you. Number three on the list of the top six jokes that make scientists more likeable. Sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium. Batman. What's the, what is the.

Periodic. On the periodic table, what's sodium? Hydrogen, helium, lithium. What letters? I don't know. What letters is sodium? I don't, I know it. N-A.

Na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na. That was really good. That was good, eh? Clever from you. Lettuce and sodium. I don't else I got it I was just giving space for everybody else but then everybody else was obviously too scared to go first I would be like please stop giving space for others

number two on the list did you know of the top six jokes that make scientists more likeable did you know that the geneticists have just found

the gene for shyness what is it they would have found it earlier except it was hiding between two other genes it's a shy gene. That was weak.

That sucked. I'll say it. That one sucked. They're making scientists less likable. Yeah. Oh, no. That makes me think that they're lame losers. And number one in the, oh, yeah, I've just realised this actually makes sense written down.

Not so much. Say that loud. Great. Great. Too bad the comedy crowd's here. Tell six jokes to make scientists more likable. There are ten kinds of people In this world

Those who understand binary And those that don't Ten One zero zero one Yeah One zero One being yes Zero being no

So if you said Do you understand binary One would say yes And that would be one And then one would say no And that would be oh But then written down One zero

It sounds like It looks like ten So usually in comedy Can I just tell you Usually in comedy What you do is You end on your strongest joke. Right. So you kind of punch out like that.

And you're like, thanks for coming. What you've done is, yeah, so. Thanks for coming. Do you feel the wave? You've started well. Strong. And you've really fizzled out. You've fizzled out.

And now it's sort of like, Vaughan Smith's good night. I think that's more on you two for being dumb. No. That's why our scientists really struggle to relate to you absolute thickos. Play ZM's Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. Silly little pole. Silly little pole.

It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Well, silly little pole, do you like mint milkshakes? Because the Shamrock Shake is a green version of the Grimace Shake at McDonald's. Remember Grimace?

Okay, but it's not lime. It's not lime. It's mint. Is it mint chocolate? It's a vibrant minty green shake. I can't see any chocolate in there. Yuck. Topped with whipped cream.

Mint shouldn't go with creamy milk. I'm just not a milk boy anymore. I'll do an ice cream, but I won't do a milk or a shake. I love a chocolate mint. Yeah, I like a chocolate mint. Mint chocolate's a different vibe. Mint chocolate chip is yum. Delicious.

But this is just mint. Like toothpaste smoothie. Yeah, like a mouthwash smoothie. Yuck. Mint. Delicious. But this is just mint. Like toothpaste smoothie. Yeah, like a mouthwash smoothie. Yuck. Mint. Okay, interesting. It's shamrock shake. So we asked you, do you like mint milkshakes?

64% of people agree with us. Really? They said, ooh, no. 36%. My mouth watering was disgusted. It's trying to flush the flavor. Do like mint milkshakes. What?

I like mint, like, after dinner biscuits. Yeah, because they've got chocolate. Because they've got chocolate. Yeah. I don't think there's anything purely mint. I have peppermint tea, but that's tea. It's different. It's watery.

And that's about a mint lolly, but then that's sugary. Thick mint. And sweet. Yeah, that's sugary. Yeah, not milky. And that's what Lydia, ourick mint. And sweet. Yeah, that's sugary. Not milky. And that's what Lydia, our first respondee, says. With chocolate, 100%. What a combo. But by itself,

not so much. People are very passionate about this. Carlina said, mint is for roast lamb, not milkshakes. Yes! Good call. She raises a fine point. That is a fine observation. Alicia says, there's nothing better. Could actually go for one right now, now that you've mentioned it.

Where do you normally get these mint milkshakes from? Is it the longest drink in town? That's lime, isn't it? Yeah, I thought it was lime. Even lime. I know, lime in a milkshake. Lime doesn't belong with milk. No, it's a citrus.

Why don't you have a lemon bloody milkshake? Yeah, you wouldn't. While you're at it, you wouldn't. You're mad No, it's a citrus. Why don't you have a lemon bloody milkshake? Yeah. While you're at it. You're mad. Spearmint, yes. Peppermint, no. Mint, also no. Yeah, they are different.

What's a spearmint? Sweeter. Okay. Sweeter. Okay. I'm a bit lame, said... By the way, it's the return of Grumpy Lisa. It's good to hear from Grumpy Lisa.

Thank God she's back. I'm a bit lame. She's been grumpy to herself. I'm not a fan of milkshakes in general. There she is. There's good to hear from grumpy Lisa. Thank God she's back. I'm a bit lame. She's been grumpy to herself. I'm not a fan of milkshakes in general. There she is. There's the girl we know and love.

Hates milkshakes. I agree though. Too much milk in one go. I don't think it would I don't think I would be airtight anymore. Oh she means she gets farted.

A little bit farty. Airtight? Even a milky sometimes a moccaccino for me. That'll get me a bit If I have a big three scoop ice cream, I've got an hour and a bit until I'm getting into a tooty boy.

Getting runs. But mint, absolutely no. It's about time everybody who said yes gets a grip. That's from Grumpy Lisa. I can't find, sorry, I've just looked up the longest drink in town, syrups, you know, the classic giraffe milkshake. I can't find mint. Strawberry, chocolate, nana, lime.

Yeah. No. That's what the next person says. Susie said the unacceptable green milkshake flavour is lime, of course. Even that. We're on the edge. Hell yeah, the fake mint syrup is the best with lots of ice cream, but not whipped cream.

Okay. That's from Annie. She's wrong. The fake mint syrup? I've never even seen fake mint syrup. Abby says, controversial, but I'm a Jaffa milkshake girl. Hey. Okay, I don't mind a Jaffa milkshake.

Because again, chocolate. Chocolate is lived in the orange. Yeah. It's chalk orange. We're not just going a straight orange milkshake. Garrett said, what you're describing, is that another name for a mojito? Because yes, if so, but if it's got cream in it, then no.

Yeah. No, we're not talking about mojitos, which are of course delicious. Oh my goodness, yes. Oh, the muddled mint and sugar at the bottom. The white rum. Oh, stop. Delightful, but I'm afraid not, Gareth. We're actually talking about mint milkshakes.

That's a silly little pass. 16 past seven. Went to Toilet the other day in a mall and I was shocked and offended. And I've brought something in for you guys to experience yourselves. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. In Auckland, there is a new mall in Newmarket. Newish, right?

The Westfield. For like a couple of years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it was kind of already a mall. It became bigger. Yeah, but for people that years Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it was kind of already a mall. It became bigger Yeah, but for people that haven't, yeah that mall was crap. But the people that have not seen it, it's like

quite high end, like it's quite posh. Yeah, it's quite posh Like, and you go into the bathrooms and they're like designer It's not like clicky cubicles you know, it's all like wood panelling Yeah, it's a bit wood panelling and from the ceiling they pump out

like a perfume in the woman's toilet. Do they? Yeah, like it's nice. You know why? Because the women's, there they smell more.

It's stinking. We just stink all the time. Head to toe. I'm sure it's like that in the guys one. I'm sure it is. Way to make you feel better. Yeah, yeah.

It's actually quite nice in there. I would trust you guys to tell me that. In our working history, the female toilets at all the workplaces we've been in are always the worst. Whenever there's an email around to everybody, it's always the female toilets.

Can you flush your poos? That's always the female toilet. Stop shitting up the walls. I'm not even fighting you on this. I'm not even fighting you on this. They're nodding. The girls are nodding. Women's toilet's behaviour is disgusting.

Why is it so disgusting though? I don't know. It wafts. There's a smell. Anyway. Yeah. So I go into this toilet. I'm in the mall having a nice time.

Yeah. Having a look around. Did you take your pepper shaker back? Your salt shaker? I didn't because Vaughan's fixed it to the point that it's completely usable and working so well. Okay, right. It's got a nice crack when I crack the thing. So I'm happy with it and I know that if I need repairs, I can just take it to Vaughan for free.

Yep. So I'm walking around the shops. Oh, what's that? I need to pee. Go to the toilet. And I sit down. No, it's the toilet. You know, roomy.

Sit down and I sit down no it's the toilet you know roomy sit down and I do my business and then I reach for the toilet paper that you would expect would be you know like cheap-ish because it's a big mall

yeah what I felt shook me now I want you to close your eyes I'm going to give you an experience of the toilet paper because I thought

it was so bad I've actually brought it up again this is this is the bougie this is the bougie mall with the designer toilets. Okay, right. Close your eyes. I want you to hear it first. Okay. Oh, crepe paper.

That sounds like, yeah, it does. It sounds like crepe paper. Definitely. Some is coming into your hand. Okay. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's, oh, wow, that's really thin. There's yours. Oh, my God. You, that's... Oh, wow, that's really thin. There's yours.

Oh, my God. You can actually see through it. This toilet paper... Not quite, but... I wouldn't even say this is tissue. That's tissue paper that you'd wrap a gift in, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, it's like...

Why is it so thin? My bum hole's wider than that. I just thought it was the craziest offer. You might need to see somebody about your bum hole if it's wider than that. I just thought it was the craziest offer. You might need to see somebody about your bum hole if it's wider than that. I could not. Why, do you think OnlyFans or something? Listen to it.

And this is it. This is it since it's been softened. The man with the wide bum hole. Yep. This has been softened, crumpled in my bag for a bit, but it was like, if you imagine. I don't have my tape measure on me, but width-wise, are we talking like seven centimetres?

Yeah, what is this? You're right, it's not very wide, is it? This is one of those ones where you start, you wipe and you feel it grip and then your fingers go round and now you've got poos on your hands. Yeah. Now you've got poos on your hands. Then you've got to get more of the yuck paper to get rid of it.

And then you've got to wash your hands like four times. Oh, so much. And then you've got to be like, oh yuck, who else has this happened to? This is not good, is it? That's terrible. In a basic mall, I get a better experience. Do you know what? I think you get a better, it's almost on par with Christmas paper hats.

Yeah. Yeah, dude. It's great paper. It's great paper. It's great paper. It's great paper. I was aghast. And I was like, who do I talk to about this?

Look how easily my finger went through it. Now you've got poos on your finger. Yeah. Well, I mean, I don't, but yeah, that's how easy it was. Luckily, I was just doing the wee-wees. Was there two rolls? A wee-wee roll and a poo-poo roll? No, it was just... Because I think that would be a great idea,

the wee-wee roll and the poo-poo roll. Yeah, straight through. Straight through. Straight through. Straight through. I cannot describe to you, listen, the crunch. Well, that's really terrible, isn't it? They want me to put my genies on there.

And you're going to use more of it. So much more of it. Because you're going to have to make extra layers. And then it's going to have more chance of blocking on the flush.

But it's so stiff that if it was two ply, by the way, it's half ply. It's half of one ply. If it was two ply because it's so crunchy, it would almost be worse.

Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Anyway. Straight through. Straight through. Straight through. Do you know straight through straight on the finger i'm not touching a single handle at this mall now oh honestly because everyone's got poop on their finger because they've been using crepe paper to wipe their booty somebody said that's why you scrunch not fold but i would no the scrunch the scrunch in that there's nothing it's not wide enough to scrunch. If you scrunched this.

I'm a boulder. I'd use so much. If you scrunched this, it would be like a steelo on your genitals. Right. No. So that's a one-star review for the toilet. Five-star for the mall. Five-star for the mall.

The mall is my absolute favourite. It's not my favourite. Every floor looks the same. I don't know where I'm at. They don't look the same. That's malls, bro. They do. No. That's malls. They don't all look the same. All the floors look the same I don't know where I'm at They don't look the same That's malls bro They do No

That's malls They don't all look the same All the floors look the same There's five floors They all look the same No because on some floors There's different stores No I know

But I don't know what No I can't remember I don't go there often enough There's a food floor There's a shops floor What floor is the Lego shop on That's all I want to Like that's on four

Is that on three or four Yeah Well see I go to three And then there's 3M What a mezzanine in a mall That's madness Which one's the movies on? Great movies

Well in my eyes great movies Bad news Brad joins us In studio, hello Brad Good morning What is your official title again? Principal Economist Yeah you'll have the second bit as well Principal Economist. Oh, Principal Economist. Yeah, Economist. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've got to have the second bit as well.

Principal Economist of Infometrics. I'm also the Chief Executive. I'm the boss man. He's not here to brag, but he's a big dog. He's a big dog. We've got the big dog in. Now, does big dog, Brad, is that? Big dog, Brad.

Well, give us some good news and maybe we can make some changes. But bad news, Brad. The moniker sticks. Now, a lot is happening in the world, as usual, and we put up a question box on our Instagram and said, look, we've got Brad in. What questions do you want answered? About the economy and

everything. Because, you know, it's still tough out there, isn't it? It is, but it's getting better. We're starting to see better stuff. Spending activity yesterday came through. Still a bit soft, but getting there. People are starting to spend a bit more, so look, on the up. Hayley's been buying a lot more jackets. That's not new though.

So that's constant spending. I'm holding my stance. Constant momentum in the economy. It's on sale, Brad. You should see this jacket. It's a jacket for a lifetime. Do you know what I mean? It's not a jacket for now. You've got 50 lifetime jackets and I've never seen you wear one of them. You've got to be able to swap've never seen you wear one of them.

You've got to be able to swap them out in and out as you go. Thank you. This one has studs, Brad. Anyway. Some people have messaged in some questions. Yep. Gems. We'll start with gems. Okay.

Gem says, I use Afterpay sometimes. Is this bad? Depends. Depends a little bit on what you're using it for and how much we're talking. You can Afterpay everything now, mate. Alcohol. Yeah, I know.

That's not. That's no. Who puts the rules in place for that sort of thing? The government should. I think they've been a little bit lax there sometimes. And look, the risk here is that if you're doing something like afterpay for your groceries, like your groceries, you're going to eat them in a week, right? And then if you're still paying them off four weeks later, you're like, oh, jeez.

That becomes pretty tough. So I think in general, you want to try and avoid afterpay for the smaller stuff just because all that smaller stuff, it snowballs and it can snowball quite a lot. Your essentials. Yeah, basically. If you're thinking of those bigger items,

and this is where, you know, sometimes if you need to buy a new fridge or something, you might think about it there. But I think the biggest thing is have an idea of how you're going to repay it. Like, can you actually afford those repayments, not only now, but in two months' time or so? But generally with something like a fridge,

the place you're buying it from would do like 0% interest for 12 months or something. Because what's the deal with afterpay? You have to pay it off over... Six weeks. Yeah. Or four weeks sometimes afterpay, lay-by. She knows. I don't know.

I was going to say, someone's got a lot of insight into this Well every now and then if there's a large ticket item it just feels a little bit more digestible Like a lifetime jacket Yeah, it comes up on the bank account as after pay and not the shop that you got it from and sometimes that's just an easier conversation to have I think the big thing is just make sure you can actually repay it

like it sounds good in the moment but if you can't repay it sort of over time then you've really got to go, am I able to afford this? Because just sort of going, ah, it'll be fine next week. When it's not, it can put you into a very tough spot. What are the penalties as someone who's never used it? What are the penalties on afterpay? That's the thing. They can get quite big

especially if you, one, start missing payments and two, if you start getting a lot of things, it starts to rack up quite a bit. And that's the thing. If you can repay it, then you're fine, right? There's no issues. Same as a credit card, right? Yeah, if you pay it off just every month and you're never accruing

that interest, you're good. Okay, next question. Quick-fire saving hacks. I need $40,000 by this weekend. Is this... Their name is Hayley, but it's not our Hayley. It's not me.

It's not me. I need $40,000 by this weekend. I'm taking notes. We're pulling a heist at this time. I was going to say, I'm not quite sure how anyone amasses that amount of money. Ask Kayleigh if she's got good looking feet. Because I've got another idea if Brad doesn't say it. Yes.

Probably depends on how many lifetime jackets you've got and how many bodies you've got to wear them on. Because maybe you could do a little bit of a thrift shop sale option. Yeah, get rid of some clothes. I'm going to do it. I'm going to get rid of a lot of stuff. Anybody else just frantically want to know why she needs $40,000 worth this week? Yes, I do.

You can't really ask that on a radio show, can you? No, probably not. It could be. I don't know what the reason being. But what would be like your tiny little, because we're going to record with you a potty ep, but what would be your quick, like, got to save some money hacks?

Oh, I'd probably clamp money hacks? Oh I'd just I'd probably clamp down on everything I'd just go real hermit style lifestyle for a little bit Yeah Just straight down What is the absolute most core stuff I need?

I need food I need rent I need fuel You're speaking Ladies and gentlemen You're speaking Vaughan's language Stay at home and never go out Stay at home and sorry

I'm actually feeling unfulfilled by your advice. This was the man who decided to parade around on a big green tractor over the last weekend. It didn't cost me anything. Yeah, true. You could have been spending time making more money doing other stuff.

But Brady, we were just talking off air that we're trying to cancel the subscriptions we're not using or watch everything on Netflix and be like, I'm going to pause it for a bit. I mean, it doesn't feel like it saves you a lot of money. Have you done it though? No, but Fletch does. I do.

I jump around. Yeah, yeah. I've got them all. I mean, I think it does save you an hour, especially, I mean, how many times have you got emails in the last year or so being like, hey, by the way, this subscription's going up. Like you actually added up.

I did the other day and I've got, I'm not going to say it because it disgusts even me, but more than I would like to have thought on the old subscriptions of various things. You know, you look at your Netflix. Once you add Netflix and also, like, your music subscription and all those sorts of things, it really adds up. Especially if you're, like, you've got...

And the radio's right here for free. And it's right here for free, isn't it? We're laughing out loud. And it's on iHeartRadio if you need it when you don't have reception. Where's the bell? Where's the bell? Where's the bell? There's KPIs.

Great KPIs, Brad. Next question from our listeners. How worried should we be about our KiwiSavvies taking a dip this week? Oh, yeah, look, it's grim out there. I looked at mine this morning and there's a lot of red ink on those numbers. I think that, look, it's a tough one. I think if you look at the US economy numbers, they've lost $1.7 trillion in value in the last couple of days.

That's not a real number. You've made that up. That's how bad it is. Count to a trillion. Are you saying tariffs don't work? Well, look, the orange man has not yet called me in for an economic briefing, but if he did, man, we would have some chance.

You would have some straight words for him. Yeah, look, that one's not looking good. I think there's an element here of let's be real, and we've seen this through most of January this year. When Trump came in, there were a whole bunch of times when the market went up, then all of a sudden the market went down. It's sort of been moving all over the place. Like this could change in an instant.

He could come out today saying something completely different, and all of a sudden the markets would rally. So I think the biggest thing here is there's a lot of volatility. At the moment, if you are not a stock trader with three phones to your head sitting on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange tapping away and trying to yell out bids for buying shares, then you probably shouldn't be too worried because honestly, if it's happened, there's nothing you can do about it by now.

The biggest thing... Hey, don't you laugh at me for my hey look hey look baby you know that thing we're all going to rely on heavily when we turn 65 it's happened but look you look at someone like me I'm not 65 I'm not 65 for quite a while thank you very much there is heaps of time for the market

it's a long term isn't it I mean look if you're looking at your KiwiSaver every day you're doing it wrong you probably shouldn't be looking at it. Monthly would be max. But if you are thinking of using your KiwiSaver to go and buy a house, or you are starting to head closer to that retirement age or something, you don't want it fluctuating as much.

So you should be constantly thinking, what's my risk level? Someone like me. To go a bit more conservative. I'm under 30, so I'm high risk, baby. Let's go. I'm going to take some high risks and hopefully get some high rewards. But as I'm starting to move through life, I'm going to probably bring it down to risk level

because I don't want it to jump around as much. So if you haven't already had that conversation, now's probably the time to go and talk to someone and say, hey, look, am I in the right spot here? Gibbo wants to know, why do prices not go back down when they reduce inflation? Generally because the same reason that no one wants their wages to go down. No one likes to make less money, and that sort of is true if you're a person or a business.

So generally you don't see those prices drop back. It's also, there's a concept in economics that we call sticky wages, and that's very much around... Yuck, I've heard that rumour. No, no, no. It's because they are... I was going to say they're sticky on the downside. It's like soggy biscuit for finance bros. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He did an old sticky wages.

Oh, my God. Trenton, Trenton. Yeah. This would have made my economics class so much more fun if I had someone, people like you guys talking about this. Sticky wages. But look, generally speaking, your prices don't come down. Wages don't come down.

Everything sort of just, you hope that it starts to hold a bit more in the middle. And then hopefully things become more affordable. Because if you think of it like a balloon, it's not blowing up the balloon as fast, but the balloon's still being filled up, right? Basically. Well, you think as well of, I don't know, let's say you're buying a new computer, for example. The making of that computer didn't all of a sudden get a whole lot cheaper. Maybe the inputs to go into it, the metal and the chips and that

maybe didn't cost quite as much additional. You got a chance. Snack of changies. I'm going salt and vinegar. Yeah. For sure. Good punch. As you were, Brad.

I'm just really trying to think. I'm just really trying to think about my words before I say them now. What other food-related things can I slip in here? Guys, stop horsing around. Come on. Be serious. I'm looking at this. He never has to say this to Hilary and Jeremy when he's on 7th Shop.

No. Well, you say that, but we actually do. We just pre-record so we can just cut it up and make it look good. But no, look, the prices thing, I think everyone is definitely worried about that. Interestingly, we've seen produce that gets a bit cheaper during summer and it's happening again. That's the good news.

However, we did also notice the likes of baked beans and spaghetti and that did go up a little bit in cost in the last couple of months. Toasted sandwiches are going to get more expensive. We've had a fresh question in. Just the last question. I know we're short on time. Is Batty Brad single? It's just come in Batty Brad.

Yes. Okay, great. Someone else said, Batty Brad is under 30. He's so wise. I remember when we first met you and you were like 24. I was like, what?

24? Yeah. How old are you now? 27. 28. Are you 28? I'm getting close to that. You're so wise

Baddie Brad Answer the question The people want to know Is Baddie Brad single? Yes There you go Baddie Brad single Do with that information

What you will Thank you so much For coming in You watch out For those finance bros Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley Play ZM's

Fletchborn and Hayley I licked my finger yesterday And I stuck it in the air and I said, the nation needs a vent. Oh, you're right. I could taste it. I could taste the tension. We're just saying it's getting darker in the morning, it's darker earlier, the temperatures are going to come down.

Last time we did this, it was great. I think everybody felt better afterwards, so we're going to open it up. We're going to open up the lines for a vent. What have you got? What's gone wrong this week? What's frustrating you? You tell us. We're on your side. I love that event. Whatever you got. What's gone wrong this week? What's frustrating you? You tell us. We're on your side. I love that.

I love when we did this last time. We're totally on your side. So you call us up. 0800-DARLS-AT-M. Or you text in 9696. And you just let off a little bit of pressure. Could be anything. Someone you're working with.

The relationship. Yourself. You hit your knee this morning. You got a little pull in the back of the neck and it's really like, it's the tension you need to release. We're here. As sort of semi-quasi medical professionals. That's right.

Do you want to start? I feel like I've been really working on the booty. Right, okay. And the booty gains aren't coming fast enough. Also, Fletch brings in an apple every week for us. Every day. And we get a slice every day. And your apples taste like dust and dirt.

Yep. And here it is. This is me dropping it on the ground. I don't want it. Which is weird because I have a lot of apples. I thought it's a nice apple. It's been a nice apple this week. Four days this week I've told you we need to shut down.

Yeah. It's disgusting. I'll go next. I've got an ungrateful work colleague. Wow. That sounds really awful to work with. Yeah. Not even a friend.

I'll go next. I've got, there's people with really serious things going on in their life and someone's bitching about an apple and someone's bitching about an apple. It's the vent, Vaughn. Okay, it's the vent. Give us a call, 0800-DIALS-AT-M, text in 9696, whatever it is you want to vent about. Get it off your chest.

I love this segment so much. Yeah, me too. Oh, no. Hey, guys, not a good day so far. My vape just ran out. Now I'm at work managing three useless electrical apprentices with goddamn flavoured air. Flavoured ear.

Just suck in normal ear. Yeah. It's not the same, bro. It's not the same, is it? Not the same on the side. I've got three cold sores. Oh, no. I just got rid of one two weeks ago and now three?

This is wildly unfair. Very unfair. Alicia, what do you want to vent about? So I actually want to ring up and vent about the fact, on behalf of pretty much all of New Zealand, obviously, that I can't get through to the secret sound. The phone lines are so cold. What, like it's hard?

Well, Alicia will give you a guess now. How does that sound? So, I mean, you got through to this, though, so that's something. I mean, you probably wouldn't have won anyway, and you got to talk to us, so you got the better part of it, right? Yeah. We're way better than 50K. I was not going to guess the zip tie, though.

Oh, you think it's a zip tie. Interesting. This is a formal guess. Interesting. Not a formal guess. Not a formal guess. Well, good luck, Alicia. Bye.

Sorry. Nick, what do you want to vent about? Oh, mate, like, I'm getting my shower replaced because it had some massive leaks in it. Yeah. And unfortunately, there's been some delays and there's only one shower in the house. It's a bit cold in Wellington,

so I've been taking jailhouse showers in the backyard with a hose. Oh! Nick! Far out. You're nipply out there. Are you saying that you're getting some renovations done and there's been a delay? That's unheard of. That's wild. That's crazy. Right? Wow. Well, next thing you're telling me, the

tradie's just going to nip out real quick to grab something and be gone for five hours. Yeah, and go shopping. That's also happened. They're late this morning and I've just had to leave a key. Of course they are. Nick, just had a baby wipe. When I didn't have a shower for nine months,

the amount of times I said I showered, but it was just a baby wipe. You're all right. I wouldn't recommend that. Colleagues can smell that. Yeah, there was a five-day period, wasn't there? Thank you, Nick.

Suzanne, what do you want to vent about? I want to vent about what I heard you talking about this morning, about the public toilet. Oh, my God. What's the issue with your public toilet? No. I actually, oh, no. Hang on.

First time caller, long time listener. Oh. One of my bells is gone. It's right there. Where? Oh, thank you. Oh, my God. It was right next to me.

Are you okay? You couldn't see that. No, I think I've got a tumor. It's not a tumor. What's happening with your public toilet? So, okay, so I'm a cleaner. I clean public toilets, and I can absolutely 100% assure you that men's toilets are the worst,

and I've got the pictures to prove it. Oh! We're going to see it. I'm going to take your word for that. I don't want to see the pictures. She's the one cleaning them. I'm going to say at workplaces I've been in, it's always the females bitching about the

female toilets. Maybe we just have higher standards and what we think is awful. They definitely bitch about them, but the men's toilets are unbelievable. Really? Okay. Sarah, can I just take a moment? Sorry, go on.

Sorry. So many people say that, that it's a woman's toilet, but I assure you it's not. Okay. Suzanne, I'd like to take a moment on behalf of the nation to thank you for your service. Yes, thank you. Thank you for your wonderful job.

Thank you for your vent and thank you for your service. Vaughan, have you been to the Morrinsville toilets as of late? Yes, I stopped in there over summer. The ones with the weird possum painted on the outside. Yeah, that's the ones. Those are the ones I cleaned. Oh, lovely. Yes, but the Morrinsville women are very respectful.

They're a different breed. Lovely. My mother, for example. In the big city. Jacinda, another example. Yeah, that's true. Big city. Those big city women are feral.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Vaughn just called me a Brazil 2. To be fair, it's Brazil though. It's Brazil. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so you would be a 2 in Brazil. Yeah, no, that's fair. That's fair.

But Wellington. You'll get there and you'll acclimatise. Yeah, Wellington 7. Wellington 7. Yeah, unless it's a good day. Yeah. And then it's Wellington 5. Guys, so many messages in.

Like, unreal. We want you to vent. Vent. Get it off your chest. unless it's a good day and then it's Wellington 5 guys so many messages in like unreal we want you to vent get it off your chest get it off your chest it's no good to hold on to it that's how we have strokes I want to vent about

stupid humans specifically stupid humans with stupid questions nah mihi nah mihi nah mihi vent received thank you very much

I'm in the boring training videos part of the first week of a new job. It is so painful and it's all very common sense based. Oh no, do what I do for those videos we have to watch. You just press play, turn the sound off and just guess the right answer. Go and cook

your dinner and come back. It's seemingly obvious what it is. Seemingly obvious. I paid thousands to stay in a hotel room with my husband and kids last week. Guess where that was? The Gold Coast. Hashtag worst timing ever. Yeah, those videos of the beach just carved out.

Dude, it's wild, eh? Insane. The goddamn price of olive oil is my event. I paid $30 for one litre of olive oil last night. Daylight robbery. $30?

If you're paying $30 for a litre of it, I hope you're not cooking with it. You know it's my big bugbear. No, I love cooking with olive oil. Don't cook with olive oil. No, you don't cook with olive oil. Don't cook with olive oil. You can.

You can. I've got a workmate who's got a horrendous BO and it's just way too awkward to say anything so I've just been putting up with it and I need to vent to you guys about it. Leave a Lynx Africa on his desk.

It's a good idea, actually. Oh, my filling fell out and it hurts every time I eat but I'm too scared to go to the dentist. You've got to go. Don't be scared to go to the dentist.

Yeah, you're only going to make that worse. You're a lovely dentist. I've got a lovely dentist. I've got a lovely dentist. Rob. Lovely dentist. Oh, yeah. He's really make that worse. You're a lovely dentist. I've got a lovely dentist. I've got a lovely dentist. Rob. Lovely dentist. Oh, yeah. He's really good.

My kid's crying in the car. That's no name for a dentist. Rob? Yeah, Rob. That's not a dentist's name. That's a greenskeeper's name. Brian. Brian's a dentist. Nah, Brian. Brian's an electrician. Brian's an electrician. Yeah, or a mechanic. Definitely a mechanic. Stuart is a great name for a dentist. Stuart is a dentist.

My kid's crying in the car because he threw his dummy, and apparently that's my fault. I've got too much to do and not enough time. I'd have a hangnail. Slam on the brakes. That'll always shut them up when my kids are little. Because they're in those five-point safety harnesses where you can roll the car and they'll be sweet.

Just slam on the brakes. Don't do that. That always brightens up their day. Wife left me three weeks ago and still hasn't told me why. What? They finished it with, hey-o. Hey-o. I'm sorry, but you have to know.

That's how every separation team should end. Hey, sorry. It's over. Hey-o. Hey-o. Wouldn't that drive you crazy, though? Yeah, it would. It's horrible.

It's torturous. You've got to know. It's actually very cruel. Yeah. Why does my four-year-old's daycare let him nap all day, and then he comes home and he doesn't want to go to sleep until midnight? It's their job to keep him running around and bring him home exhausted.

I found out in the week that my new boyfriend's a serial cheater and a pathological liar. Why don't we have a public douchebag list? Well, we simply can't risk the indemnity. The legal slander. The legal side of it. Slandering. Although he would have to prove he wasn't a manhole. Nope.

Now you might get this, Vaughn. The cows are so slow. They're cows are so slow. They're so fat and slow. They don't come in to get bailed to get milk. They don't walk or want to be walked either. So frustrating. I ask them nicely to hurry up and they don't. Weird at this time of year.

It's cooling down. I mean, it's still pretty hot in the afternoon. Afternoon milking will be slow going. Slow going. Dusty. Cow tings. Cleaning the house as they do. Cow tings. Cow tings. I don't understand. It's cow tings. Cow tings. Cleaning the house as they do. Cow tings. Cow tings.

I don't understand. It's cow tings. Cow tings. Yeah, man. All we are talking is cow tings again. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. It's one of our bonding things that Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley do as genuine friends is send reels. All day.

I just sent a Kraken reel of a guy up the mast of a ship sailing through Antarctica on a bluebird day. I will say that's not always the sort of vibe of the reels. No.

Definitely not. That's at the wholesome end of the scale. I feel like if someone had to go through all of the stuff we send each other we wouldn't have

our jobs anymore. It wouldn't be called Fletchford and Hayley. There's some dark humour in there. It'll be John, Mary and Joe. Zed-In. Zed-Anne.

Zed-Anne's new hot, rough and breakfast show to replace those perverts and creeps that we just fired. And again, we apologise for ever hiring them. We wouldn't have if we knew what the reels were that they sent each other. I mean, the reels are on Instagram and we're not making them. Yeah, we're not making the reels.

Blame Meta. Blame Meta. Blame the creators. That's right. For that dark humour. Sometimes I hit send on them and, you know, it was a mistake. If it made us laugh, that's by the by. So apparently Instagram is trialling something.

You know how they sort of drop things when a few users' apps for a while to trial them? Oh, do you remember I was once one that, I was, remember I got something early? I forget what it was. Was it Black Instagram? Yeah, I think it was Black Instagram. Yeah, and then Millennial Font. Yes.

I didn't get it for ages. You didn't get Millennial Font for a long time. I literally got it a couple of months ago. Poster, that's Millennial Font. Yes, we love it. This is called Blend. Now, this is something, I think Spotify does it, where you can kind of like join in on each other's playlist

and then the algorithm like keeps the playlist updated with stuff that, you know, I know all of us would like. It's the same thing but for reels on Instagram. So don't widen your eyes. It'll be okay. But it would be like, so Fletch, Fora and Hayley, what's our chat called? Ondagram would have, based on the reels that we send each other,

thematics, It's only just going to get worse. would create for us and us only a specific feed that we would scroll through that would use our algorithm to show us three

things that only we would like. How would we access it? Through the chat? Would it be in the chat? There would be another window, like another tab called blends and then it would have us

and we can click on it and then we'd be going through and then scrolling like you do on the reels but it's just for us a curated feed just for us okay

yep so I like to ignore the fact that there is an algorithm I like to think everything presented me as completely random and I'm like man

some of this is dark oh I just keep getting it I just keep getting it weird humor yeah yeah and but now it's going to be undeniable because it's going to say due to what you've sent each other yeah shared and like yeah i mean that's pretty much the discover page right if you open up instagram or any app no no someone's someone's hacked my discover page i don't know what's going on because all the hot models are on there, eh? How did they get there? Abs, abs, abs, abs.

Abs, yeah. Abs. And then every now and then I see a Land Rover and I'm like, maybe the algorithm does work. She's back. It would be kind of like that, but it's, you know, like because our algorithms sometimes, Fletchwell and Hayley, sync up and we're on the same buzz.

But sometimes they get out and then our little real feeding chat has a real mixed bag to it. So that feed made just for FEH on to Graham would be that mixed bag. And do you have to make the feed or does it make a feed for all of your group chats? No, you have to make it so we're saying like, oh, Hayley's invited you guys to a blend. Okay, right. And then you jump in the blender with me. So this is just another way it's wasting our time. Dude.

Like, I mean, we already waste each other's time sending each other stuff. But, okay, even more time will be wasted now. It would be funny to try to count how many reels we send each other in a day. But it's a lot. And some days it's more than others. It's up there. But not a day goes by without any. I get excited when Fletch sends one.

Yeah, because I'm not a big sender. You always laugh, react and lurk. Every now and then you send one. We're the topsies at the bottom. Yeah. I'm more quality over quantity, thank you. Yeah, when you send one it hits for sure. Yeah. We have misses sometimes. Not often a miss.

Well, if you want to be part of our blend, then you're going to have to start contributing. Okay, well, it's coming. It's coming. 19 past eight. Next on the show. I've got a question about my bitmoji. Okay.

Right. Okay. A bitmoji question for you and the listeners. All right. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Hayley hasn't even got her headphones on. She's very distracted. She's got this devilish smirk on her face. You do.

What's the devilish smirk for? There's no devilish smirk. Dude, that was the most devilish smirk on her face. You do. What's the devilish smirk for? There's no devilish smirk. Dude, that was the most devilish smirk I've ever seen. Boo. And that's a lie? Look at that smile. It's all teeth. Who are you messaging?

Who are you messaging? No one. No one. Wow. Something is amiss over there. Don't put your finger at me, Carwen. You see the look, right? Something's going on.

You're not doing anything. I would say for three quarters of that Benson Boone song, she was glazed. I know. And frantically typing. You guys are crazy. Now she's gaslighting us. Like it never happened.

That's nuts. Well, I would like to talk about Bitmojis, which I have just been relentlessly mocked. Because apparently no one's using them or talking about them or acknowledging their existence at the moment. Well, we're at our social media desk, producer Shannon. Do you want to start the roasting? Well, you just said, am I saying it right?

Everyone's laughing at me. And I think it's because no one says it out loud because no one cares about them. I don't know what they about them. I don't know what they're called. I don't know what they're called. Well,

like, they exist and like, I have one on my Snapchat but I would never think to update it or anything.

Like, Apple has them, Meta has them, Snapchat. I just said my name is Pink in it. The ones in Messenger are yuck,

creepy. They give me the real ick. Meta has ruined everything. Do you know what they remind me of? You know those things that people are doing on TikTok with the like... Oh, animatronic.

Those things. What are animatronic? What do you mean? You know when they were like... Also, stop changing the subject. What were you looking at? Nothing. Nothing.

What are you doing over there now? You're doing... Is that that one Where they're like Me do believer Yes that When people pretended To be NPCs

And they would Try and move Animatronically Yes Because of that Five nights at Freddy's Thing it became a trend And then I think

It became a kink I thought what you That's a very good point I thought what you Were just doing Was that furry thing Yeah that's what I'm talking about

Five nights at Freddy's. By the way, if my kids are like, I think August is on the way to school in the car. She'll love this. What are you doing? Stop it. That's what Bitmojis give me the energy of. Right, the energy of.

What's your question? I've got a question about my Bitmoji on Snapchat. Can you send it through to the group chat? Wait, you're not, wait. Do you know what, I've got a thing and it's not just bitmojis, it's emojis as well. People that up their skin colour

and their tan. Oh my God, during the summer. Somebody messaged me the other day and I was like, you are, that is too brown for you.

But I'm really brown in the summer. I've got a big problem. No, but, I just realised the other day, my little emoji preference is still blonde. There's not a ginger head

girly pop. Oh, there simply must be. Chip ginger haired girly pop. Oh, there simply must be. Chapparone. Carrot top. Oh my god. Carrot top. I could have given another red hair. What is this?

I've worn yours as disgust. Why is he snorkelling at me? I don't want to be late. And we know now he's been using them. Why are you wearing a Spongebob sweater?

Oh, yeah. So that's my Snapchat one of the top. Are you wearing gumboots? What's your question? My question is. This is ick.

So I only use. Ick, ick, ick, ick, ick. You've been getting hotter and hotter and hotter and now it's all undone with your yuck bit motion.

I don't want to ask my question anymore. Ask it. Ask it. I don't want to ask my question. I know what it is. Hey, we listen and we don't judge. I will judge you as a Gen Z on behalf of my whole generation. We listen and we don't judge.

We won't judge. So I only use Snapchat to talk to my daughter. We communicate through that. We've got a streak. Yeah. Cool. We listen and we don't judge. I was going to say, I won streak yeah cool we listen and we don't judge now when i set him up as someone just said i was wearing a spongebob shirt because i couldn't find a shirt i like there was too many to think about and too much choice and i got

overwhelmed and overstimulated and i freaked out and i saw spongebob and i it's a ick but i also made this when i was 12 kgs heavier. Can I make him skinnier? This is your question. This is my question. Did you just want to get on the radio and say, guys, I've lost 12 kgs. I'm looking hot now. Also, your bitmoji is a chunky boy in this.

He's a chunky boy. Because when I was picking him, exactly, I didn't go for the biggest shape. But then the middle one, I was like, I'm not that svelte. So I went for the one that's a little pear-shaped. There's a little pear-shaped. So you think that it's time now, you've shredded enough. Can I update him? To make him thinner.

Yeah. To reflect your weight loss. What's the vibe? The vibe is we're getting rid of these ick, yuck things. And who cares? You only use Snapchat for your daughter, who you just embarrassed so deeply by saying, brr, brr, brr, brr.

Ooh. Ooh, okay. Hey, I think, Fawn, if it's going to make you feel better and you're going to feel a bit slay today by changing your bitmoji, change your bitmoji. Hey, thanks, Carla. I knew I could rely on you. To be honest, I thought you two were going to feel a bit slay today by changing a bitmoji change your bitmoji hey thanks carla i knew i could rely on you to be honest i thought you two were going to be raised to be way more than me yeah here i am i would say change your body type and please change the sponge bob so and then i'm here for it you know what's way worse my daughter actually asked me

to change the spongebob shirt because previously i had picked like a summer dress and so i was this big bearded husky jen and a summer dress and her friends are like, and she was like, my friends can see you, but my gent is not. Oh, Dad. Can you please not wear a summer dress? I'd keep it on. I'd keep it on.

I'm going to go back to the summer dress. Summer dress, but slimmer. Slim up summer dress. Flowers. Flower crown. I was wearing a flower crown too. Lovely. Well, I'm glad I,

wish I'd never bought this up. So irk. Flowers. Flower crown. I was wearing a flower crown too. Lovely. Well, I'm glad I wish I'd never bought this up. So, uh... Play Zed M's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Play Zed M's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day is things named after, or the theme this week is things named after bad people. And this one, I did not know. I've heard this mentioned multiple times, and I've never thought it would be anything other than a word,

maybe an old English word, maybe a French word. Okay. Sadomasochism. Oh, yes. It's named after a man. Marquis de Sade. What? The Marquis de Sade.

The Marquis de Sade. Sadism gets its name from the Marquis de Sade, pretty famous for its... Hello. Oh, stop it. Beep, beep, beep, beep. Sadism gets its name from the Marquis de Sade, pretty famous for its... Hello. Oh, stop it. What are you doing? Yeah, he was into weird things. That was the...

That was a... Yep. But my... Now I'm a little flustered. Masochism. Am I saying that right? Masochism. Masochism is named for Leopold von Sascha Masso,

who's a little less well-known. He had a contract with a mistress, and she signed and agreed to it, giving him certain freedoms to do things, and she was paid accordingly. Now I'm realising it's school run time, so I can't really go too deep into it. Right.

Yes. But he had a wife and she was like, I'm not actually into any of the stuff that you're into. Her name was Aurora, which I think is a lovely name. Lovely name. It is a beautiful name. I'm going to digress for just a moment. Aurora is a lovely name.

Beautiful. Was that Sleeping Beauty's name? Yes. The Disney princess was Aurora? Sleeping Beauty, lovely name. She was like, look, I'm not into this but I understand you're into it so if you want to get into it, find someone else

to be into it and that's when he got the person that he signed the contract with. What a modern way to run a relationship. You know. What is monogamy? But this wasn't modern. This was a little while ago. A little while ago. But he's a bad man? Because this theme this week is named after bad people? Yes.

He says, because it turned out that he was also engaging in this with people who were unbeknownst to the outcome of what he was getting them involved with. So he was like, let's have a little, and then it was a bit much. And he also said women should be obligated to undertake any desire that a man should. Okay, right. No, bad man. Yeah, not good.

And then he left his wife for their daughter's governess without divorcing and would say things like woman need a master to worship. There's an audience for that maybe? Yeah, there is. I feel personally I wouldn't fall well into a master, you know, set up. Today's fact of the day. Is that sadomasochism, the last part's named after a man and that was his surname. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. Play. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. We want to know, what is the store that just gets you going, just makes you go,

oh yeah, I feel it popping in. You might not even have anything to buy or you might not even buy anything. Those stores that you just love wandering around. Okay. I feel like you would

just go to Mitre 10 just to wander around. Yeah, I'll go for a Mitre 10 wander. And just be like, nice. EB Games, I'll go for a little wander

if I've got the time. Yeah. Pop in. Oh yeah, have a little EB Games, nerdy look. The smell of it, the feel of it,

the look of it. See if I can find myself a little treat. So Kmart's already coming for the text machine. Obviously, that goes without saying. I need to get my sewing machine repaired. I thought you got it repaired. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, sorry.

I needed to. Past tense. Past tense. And I'm not a big craft person, right? Yeah. And I'm not even a big sewer. I'm just trying to get back into it. So I was looking up Auckland Auckland Sewing Machine Repairs

and found this place, Ribbon Rose. Ribbon Rose. Ribbon Rose. I get out there. R-O-S-E or R-O-W-S? Rose. Flower. The flower, R-O-S-E. And I get out there and it's a wild drive away. I was like, God, I've got to find something closer.

Get out there. It looks like this huge, it's like this huge three, four story building in an industrial area. I was like, I gotta find something closer get out there it looks like this huge it's like this huge three four story building in an industrial area I was like this is a huge mistake I'm gonna walk into some bloody factory thing and ugh yuck I walk through it is a heavenly wonderland a heavenly wonderland is it like spotlight

but no like on steroids right okay rich spotlight like it was like there was like there was wooden shelving cotton and threads and stuff steroids. Right, okay. Rich spotlight. Rich spotlight. There was wooden shelving, cotton threads and stuff. So I text my best friend who knits and I said, oh my god

I found this shop. She was like, Hayley I'm aware of Ruben Rose. I text Shannon, my craft friend, I say, oh my god have you heard of Ruben Rose? She's like, Hayley, heard of? You live there. It's your second home. Well, I wish I lived there. It's not cheap. It's not cheap.

Everything's pretty much hand-dyed, but I've bought stuff from there before, and it is, like... Just colourful. It's a delight to the senses. I could spend, like, not even being silly, six hours there without getting bored. Just looking at different shades of cotton.

Every floor is a different craft. Yeah, there's pens, there's paints, there's easels, there's cross-stitch stuff, there's stuff that fluff. And then, like, oh, my God. And I just went and I was like, while I'm here, I should get some purple cotton for the purple cushion I'm going to make. Purple? What about 50 Shades of Purple?

And I was like, this is incredible. That was that movie, wasn't it? Yeah, different, slightly different film. Yeah, it was. A different version. It was just amazing. It was grimace. It was the? Yeah, different, slightly different film. Yeah, it was. A different bit of different. It was just amazing. It was grimace. It was the sex stuff, but it was grimace.

It was grimace. It was very odd. Really confusing. Are you taking me to the red room? No! I'm taking you to the purple room. I'm burglar, get into my cage. Anyway, so I went downstairs and I said to the woman,

I was like, do you reckon this is the happiest place in Auckland? And the woman was like, yeah, yeah, it's Gawson, man. She works there. So that'll be $162. It's not her happiest place. She works there. Anyway, it was like,

I'm not a craft person. I actually don't have need to buy craft supply, but I'm like, I can't wait to go back and just look and be amongst it. We all have those stores. Yeah. Sometimes I get excited in a stationery store.

Like all the pens. Nice pens. But do we have stationery that has those little test pads? Yeah. Like a nice ink pen. And you'd be like this with Mitre 10. I love this. If someone says I do this with cinemas and malls,

I always just walk by, I'll be like, see what's playing. Snort some free buttery popcorn smell and leave. Just go in and they read the big screen with all the little things. Yeah, just say what time and see what sort of novelty popcorn bucket they've got this month. Sniff the popcorn and leave. Shannon, do you have a part from your craft store, do you have a store that you just love going to?

I reckon Chemist Warehouse is my version of Mitre 10. It's a girl's Bunnings. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just, I could go through every aisle and be like, I could use that. So you get here and you go and you're like, what does that do? You know when you pick up a prescription

and you just wander around and you're just like, I could get that. Every time I go, they're like, is it okay if you give us 20 minutes? I'm like, give me 30. Give me 30 minutes. Take the outboard.

You ever see yourself, find yourself looking at the knee braces being like, maybe I need that. You never feel nice. Because my knee gets a bit, my knee gets a bit loose

feeling sometimes. I literally just got shock absorbers from my shoes for there. How good? Shock absorbers for your shoes? I'm absorbed. This is so good. Were you quite often jumping down and jarring? A little XM Insoles. Shock absorbers for your shoes. I'm absorbed. This is so good.

Were you quite often jumping down and jarring? No, I felt, I could feel the plastic of the bottom of the shoe. You know, when you go through it. Oh, is that like a new insole?

Yeah, but it absorbs the shock. Yeah. Bouncy. Aftermarket. Aftermarket shock absorbers. We want to take your texts and calls. So many already. 9696 to text in

0800 DALS at M is the number. What are those stores that just get you going? Oh great. We love to pass the time as humans. What stores get you going?

I went to a craft store called Ribbon Rose and it's just I don't craft but it was just like the colour, the texture, there's so much

to see and do. And just those places you can just walk around you don't even need to buy anything but you're just like you're so happy. And just those places you can just walk around. You don't even need to buy anything, but you're just like, you're so happy. Yeah. Yeah.

It's just a joy. Some great texts and calls coming through. Jessica, what is the store for you that gets you going? Acquisitions. Far out. That's funny. That rings a bell. It's the homeware store often in malls.

Yes. Yes. Purple and green. Yeah. Yeah. They'll have some lava lamps, they always have lava lamps.

No, they won't have lava lamps, they always have like, kiwiana. Oh, yeah. They have like, little glass statues and everything

and I'm like, oh, they don't look pretty in my room but then I remember I've got a niece and I'm like, mm, no. There's beads,

there's jewellery, there's homeware, there's some malamine plates with different bugs on it. See, love those. Oh, that store. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And you can always find a pashmina, couldn't you, Jessica, if you've got cold? Oh, yeah, definitely. I go there for my grandma for birthday and Christmas. She absolutely loves it. That's perfect. Grandma's shop of choice. Yeah, it gets you going. Jessica, thank you.

Maggie, what's the store that gets you going? West Goes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you like picking up the cutlery and getting it like, oh, the weight of that fork would be perfect. Yeah. If I ever need to replace my cutlery.

Yeah. I studied culinary arts at uni, so it's just incredible going there and just testing out the spatulas. Yeah, the spatulas. Yeah, giving the spatula the old one too. Got a nice weight. I like that. Yeah. Oh, man, spatulas. Yeah, give them a spatula there. Nice weight. Put a nice weight. I like that. Yeah.

Oh, man. That's your heaven. How often, Maggie, would you go in without buying anything? It's at least once a month. Just to parade around. I love that. That's so good. And I just go in and find something that I need and convince my mum to buy it.

Yeah, that's good. That's even smarter. Maggie, thank you. Shay, what are the stores that get you going? Oh, I just love an op shop. Oh my God, me too. You never know what you're going to get. I could lose an op shop all day.

90% of the time it's stuff you're not interested, but that 10%, that's the exciting part. When you get a rare find. The gold. I just hate it because I find something, I'm like, if only that was a 32 or a medium. I know, you find nothing. You find nothing and it's the wrong size. Yeah, I hate that.

It's treasure hunting for adults. Yeah, it is treasure hunting for adults. I get it. Do you know, some people just hate it. Hayley, I know you're a hot girl with tummy issues. I am a hot girl. Do you find that you start perusing a shop and then you're like, always need to poop. If I don't go to the toilet now. Shay! Yes! What do you mean? Every time I go to Save Ma, I need to poop. If I don't go to the toilet now. Shay!

Yes! What do you mean? Every time I go to Save Mart, I need to poop. I don't know what it is. This is a known thing. It's because there's smells in there that your body recognises

that makes you comfortable and makes you relax. And so it all just kind of like flows to the next stage. Shay, that's why us hot girls have tummy issues of pooping in the store. Not pooping in the store.

It's always in a place that relaxes you and makes you feel comfortable. You might feel at home about it or you might be excited about it and you smell something and it's Pavlovian. It's because all the old people did smell in op shops. And what's Shea and I love? Telling me about my house.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's good. It means you're relaxed there. It means the moment of zen you're relaxed and all that tension that you were holding's gone and it just starts to flow through. That's the same reason you poop at Mitre 10. Do it every time. So relaxed. Yeah, so relaxed. I'm not even kidding. Sometimes on the drive home I'll be like, I'm not going to make it. Go back in's the same reason you poop at Mitre 10. Do it every time. So relaxed. Yeah, so relaxed. I'm not even kidding. Sometimes on the drive home,

I'll be like, I'm not going to make it. Go back in. I'm going to go to Mitre 10 and do a poop. So many messages in. So many. More Wilsons. That's like a wholesale food at Wellies. That's so much fun.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, Trade Aid. Someone's store is Trade Aid. Little trinkets. handmade bits and bobs. Shano's Bakery in Hastings. Best meatballs and pies. Brisket pies, three thumbs up. Non-spawn, just a fatty that loves bakeries.

You're just perusing the bakery. Just perusing Shano's. Well, maybe sometimes I'll go past the bakery and be like, I wonder what their slices are like here. Do they do a good naming tag? Yeah. Have a nosy. This is a great one.

Someone mentioned a florist. Yep. Just looking at all the flowers. I love that. Being like, these are beautiful. Sorry, Georgia Stew Stews. Stewie Louie.

Now that you're married, do you have a store that gets you going? Okay, hear me out. Plant Barn. Because. No need to hear you out. I completely agree.

Garden centres. And you can go, they've got like a boutique-y store on the side where you can get some nice homewares. Yeah. And then you can get a panini. Yeah, a coffee. And a barbecue.

It's so good. I've never seen a barbecue. And then a beautiful hydrangea. And then a Buddha statue. Oh my God. A fountain. Where Buddha's holding a ball. A circular ball.

And water comes out and the ball spins and he's blowing smoke out of his ears. Jobless. I love it. You're right. Those stories. They were never great as kids.

No, you hated them as boring. But now you go. touching your thing. Yeah. Someone just shout out to people visiting car yards.

Popping into a car yard looking around the cars. Just going for a walk. No intention to buy. Just have a little look at the cars. My dad likes doing that when he comes to Auckland.

Should we find ourselves in central Auckland, that one on K Road, the Ford Yard, he'll go for a walk around there. And they'll be like, you're right. And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just having a bit of a look. Does he test drive? God, no.

No, Mum wouldn't let him. Don't be stupid, Ian. Get back in the car. We're leaving. Someone loves popping into Harvey Norman and just trying out the leather couches. Yes. Oh, you're just wandering around.

Yeah. I'm actually watching a wall full of massive TVs all playing the same animated thing and you're looking around and you make yourself a little bit of a TV expert and then you say to someone, they only put on animation because it makes TVs look better than they are. Or colourful. Well, you've really ruined their day. Yeah. I like to ruin people's days.

Somebody else said the Casino. Oh, we don't encourage that here. Somebody said farm stores, like your PJG Wrightsons, your Farm Source, your Farmlands. You go in, it always smells like meal and rubber gumboots. Yuck. There's lots of things to look at. Actually, like, Burnscow is good for that, eh?

Where you go in, they do, like, camping and all sorts. You just don't expect it. The boating store. Is it Burnscow? Burnscow, yeah. So, do not all of us have a boat? I don't even have a boat. One can dream.

Do you not have a boat? How embarrassing for you. Oh my God, I love when you go get something for your yacht. Do you know what I loved the other day? I had to go into J-Car to look for a specific end cord. I love going in there. And the guys, I was like, terrible customer service from my particular experience. They had no interest in me.

They were doing some tech stuff and they were like, what do you want? And I was like, I need this cord. And then it got them going. And I was looking around the cords. I was like, look at these cords. Oh, you had to kick off their tis. Yeah. I had to kick it off.

You had to find their special hyperfixation for the day. And it was finding the cord for me. And it just so happened to be cordians that day. Did they look you in the eye? Not once. Didn't think so. I was the damsel in distress. Okay.

Somebody said Cracker Jack. Now, I completely agree. Because if you don't go to Cracker Jack for a couple of months, you walk in, it's a completely different store. Yeah. They've got a container of bloody Vietnamese cane baskets. And you're like, they weren't here last time. Yeah.

This is full of weird garden wheelbarrows. That's the place that had the hiff. Not jiff. The siff. They spell it not jiff. Not because it's parallel imported. Yeah. Yeah. That's the last time I was like oh it's called hiff. Now. Didn't we look up why that was and wasn't jiff J-I-F

an offensive word? Maybe. So they had to change jiff to siff. Apologise to our Spanish listeners. To our jiff listeners. Oh no don't say that. Oh God, sorry. I don't know, I'm scared. Don't say that. I'm scared. What else have we got here?

Motorcycle shops. Never intend on buying one, just quite like looking at them. Peter Alexander, just get a whiff of that smell. Oh, they always pump out the kids.

Yeah, the Jami smell. Hope they've got an extra 20% off sale. Yeah, why not? Of course they will. Anywhere that sells pet food. Our show sponsor, Animates. I don't know if you mean Anim sale. Yeah, why not? Of course they will. Anywhere that sells pet food. Our show sponsor, Animates. Yeah, yeah, fantastic.

I do love walking around in Animates. The smell of pet food. Someone loves going to like Plumbing World and looking around all the like set up bathrooms. You know, like how they've got that sort of mock bathrooms and stuff. I totally get that. And the signs, do not poop in this toilet. Do not poop in the toilet, yeah.

Did we talk about the rock shop? No. No. Someone said the rock shop back in the days of Disneyland. You're just like, where else am I going to see a banjo in real life?

Yeah. Didn't I go with you once and you bought a harmonica? Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right. I was like, you can buy harmonicas. Yeah, you're still buying harmonicas. Like music and stuff.

What a wild world. Now I just feel like a peruse. I feel like a window shop today. Oh, another one in the bag. It's a Versace bag as well If you enjoyed that give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell your mates You don't sound sincere there boy

I'm just reading what's written here