ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 14th February 2024

Episode Date: February 13, 2024

Facebook Chirping  Top 6: Adult Happy Meals  Bad News Brad Olsen: Valentines Day!  Secret Slurp  Morgan Penn!   Producer Jared's Supermarket Faux Pas  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch, Fawn and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Good morning, welcome to the show. Fletch, Fawn and Hayley, happy Valentine's Day. Happy podcast launch. Oh, it's all go today, isn't it?

Season two of Sex.Life. It's live, as of two minutes ago. Sex.Life is out now, you can download it. I mean, hang out with us for a little bit. Yeah, listen. Obviously, listen after the show. Yeah. You could dip in and out.

Right. So you're going to do an episode, one episode for season two every Wednesday. Every hump day. Every hump day. Yeah. So Ep1 out today. And because Ep1 is out today, we are going to chat to your podcast co-host, sexologist Morgan Penn. About Valentine's Day.

How to keep it spicy. So after seven this morning, she's joining us in studio. Producer Shannon's gotten him first, because Aaron wasn't awake so he hasn't asked me. And I've got here, Happy Galentine's Day from Shannon. Not only has she crocheted me a little rose, potentially

vulva, can't tell. She also got me a banana nippies. Now, she knows that's my drink of choice. She listens. She listens. She listens. That's all you need to do for Valentine's Day. What would you have got, Hayley, as her drink of choice?

Well, it's probably too early to have an Aperol spritz or a Prosecco. A Negroni sour. Yep, all of those are good. He listened. Prosecco with A Negroni sour. Yep. All of those are good. He listens. Prosecco with a sniff of orange juice. Yes. As a mimosa. He listens.

Spawn, what activity would you have created for me if you were to ask me to be your Valentine? Compliments. They listen. We listen. We know. We know. Beautiful.

We do. I would have just left you two alone. Yeah. I listen. Yeah, that's really good. We listen. We know, we know. Beautiful. We do. I would have just left you two alone. Yeah. I listen. Yeah, that's really good. I listen. Now, because it's Valentine's Day, before seven this morning, we're going to chat to our dear friend, Brad Olsen, economist, for some Valentine's stats, like how much we spend.

He hates spending money. This is the one thing I like him wholeheartedly. I just keep a slither away. He'd keep you in check, wouldn't he? He would. He can't be my Valentine. He doesn't listen to the fact that I like to spend money. To spend money. So we'll get some Valentine's stats from him before seven.

Also, soon the top six Australia have launched adult happy meals. Maccas. Yep. Show spots. No word if these are in New Zealand. Surely. It's been in different parts of the world Okay I was doing some light research yesterday Okay

On the adult Happy Meal So I've got the top six toys we want to see in the adult Happy Meal Now We are sponsored by McCafe Will I have to be sensible? Yeah Or do I have permission to be silly? Sensible slash silly

Like touch silly. What if I did three sensible, three silly? Yeah. Yeah, okay. Absolutely. But go bounce back and forth so we don't say silly or sensible for too long. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Six is silly. No, you want to finish on silly, so. Yeah. Silly within reason. Silly within reason. Sensible, silly, sensible, silly. Silly within reason.

That's what Colin just sent through. He has to be sensible. The worst type of silly. Yeah. Is silly within reason. Sensible, silly, sensible, silly. Silly within reason, that's what Colin just sent through. He has to be sensible. The worst type of silly is silly within reason. Oh, no, I've been too silly. That's what I'm going to say. I've been a bit silly. Next on the show, though, there's an error within the Facebook app. So I've heard.

You may have heard it chirping at you. No. When you're scrolling through the app, if you have your sound on, it's chirping and it's annoying people. Well, there's a fix and they have addressed this overnight. Give you the latest next. Yeah, see? There it just was.

It chirps at you. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Well, you may have noticed the last couple of days, the Facebook app has been chirping at you. It's the sound when you refresh, if you... So here you go. Put the speaker at the end right under the...

Yeah, yeah, there you go. Hang on. Yeah, so there we go. That's quite a nice... That's the sound for the refresh, but you're just scrolling up your page. That's every new bit of page. That's a sound.

It's not good. It'll drive you nuts after a while. It's cute the first time. Well, they have said, Facebook have said that this is a mistake. Good, it doesn't feel intentional. It's not intentional. Some people were like, oh, great, this is a new thing.

But it is a mistake and they are working on intentional. Some people were like, oh great, this is a new thing. But it is a mistake and they are working on it. But in the meantime, you can go into settings and turn off app sounds. Yeah, but is it... You know, who can be bothered with that? Or just turn your phone down. Just turn your volume

down and then they'll fix it in a couple of days. Yeah, they will. But it has been driving people crazy. So if you've noticed that. Oh, yes, you go into your Facebook app and then go. Yeah, settings, privacy, settings, media, and then in-app sounds. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Something like that. Something like that.

Or just turn your phone down. It'll be fixed in a couple of days, I'm sure. It is a very pleasant noise. I sort of like it. But just not over and over and over again. Oh, now it's not. Here you go. Oh, it knows that it didn't like it.

This is thrilling stuff. There you go. Thrilling stuff. Let's stay with this for a bit. Yeah. Shh. Shh. Shh.

Shh. Shh. Shh. Okay. Yep. Take this. That's Oh. Shh, shh. Okay. Yep. Take this. That's good. It's good stuff.

The top six next on the show. Australia have the adult happy meal. Top six toys for the adult happy meal. Silly but within reason. Silly. And it's not to anger the show's sponsor. Oh, we love the show's sponsor. You know what?

I've said it before. I'll say it again. What am I here for? To make money. Make money, bitch. I'll say it again. What am I here for? To make money. Make money, bitch. You got it. Wow.

Let's make some money next. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. From the self-driving ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hi there. Adult Happy Meals. Much like a child's Happy Meal, except the burgers, it's a Big Mac, I think. You can get a Big Mac or a Quarter Pounder. And do you get a big chip?

Yeah, you get a large chip. So it's a combo with a toy, is it? Yeah, in a box, in a special box. Oh, yeah, that's cool. That's fun. Now, we should say this is, we are talking about Australia launching this. No word if this is happening in New Zealand. You may remember this happened in America, and people went crazy. Well, we

have quite a close relationship with non-olds because they are our show sponsor, McCafe. Drive through and get a delicious cup of barista coffee on the go. Thank you. So maybe we could have a little sway. Any mention of the show sponsor in here doesn't count towards their total amount of credits for the week.

This is a freebie. This is a freebie. You pay to be on board, we, right. This is a freebie. This is a freebie. This is a freebie. Hey, this is the show we're going. You pay to be on board, we'll chuck you a couple of freebies. So in Australia, you'll get either a 10-piece Nugs or a Big Mac. 10-piece?

In the adult box, yes. Wow. And they will also include the 90s collectible, the McNugget Baddies. Which is so cute. We love a baddie. Which is a lot. Super cute. do you remember those

yes yeah they were like a Mr Potato Head yes alright but nuggets did they glow in the dark and they I believe they glow

they did glow in the dark did they yeah because they had a glow bugs vibe do you remember glow bugs yeah man the little heart

yeah and you could get all the different sorts and you'd hold them up to the light before you went to bed yeah and then you'd turn off your light and they'd get all the different sorts and you'd hold them up to the light before you went to bed. Yeah, and then you'd turn off your light and they'd glow.

Everything had to glow when you were a kid, eh? Yeah. Had the stars on the ceiling rip off all the paint. No word what chemical was doing that or what it's done to us since. Uranium. It'll be our generation's asbestos. Yeah, it will be. Everything glowed.

Well, I've got the top six adult toys. Silly, but within reason, to go into the McDonald's adult happy meal should it come to New Zealand. Okay. Number six on the list. The Satisfyer Pro 2. Now, is this silly but within reason? Silly but within reason. Okay.

Because it looks like... Grimace. A thick shake. Actually, Grimace is very... Yeah, he's more... There's another one that's like that shape. I just thought the colour was Grimace. Purple. The two is purple.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. The three is purple. The two is pink. Well, they're a uniformed colour. I assumed you could buy them in a selection of colours. I don't think so. Oh, you can. I thought everyone had the pink two and the purple three. Right. Well, it could be a grimace.

Maybe you think of it as a bit more... There's another female toy that's like a shape. It's going to blow out the cost of the Happy Meal, though, isn't it? Yeah. Well, I mean, that's the thing. You get a little treat. Yeah. It's like the toy's the main thing, but you're getting a little snack.

Number five on the list of the top six toys for an adult Happy Meal celebrity within reason. A 10,000-piece Lego set of the entire McDonald's menu. That would be quite fun. That'd be cool. Yeah. A Lego set, and you make the Big Mac, and then you make the Nuggies, and then you make the fries in the box. That could just be something cool that Lego could look into.

How are you going to Lego the fries? Dude, I don't know how people Lego anything. If you see something made of Lego and you're like, how did the person at Lego sit down and be like, I know how to do this. I like the flower ones, the bouquets. They're real cool.

They're really cool. They're real cool. Number four on the list of the top six toys for an adult Happy Meal. Silly but within reason. A remote control McDonald's delivery truck. Oh, yeah. You know, it's all, you know, in their colours.

Their livery. Do you say that if it's not a plane? I don't know, actually. Just with their logo and colours. Yeah, their logo and their colours. Wait, so you get a whole remote control car in a Happy Meal? Yeah, in a truck. I'm thinking a Kenworth W990.

Right, a whole truck. A big sexy truck. How do you get that in the box? Well, it's a very big box. It's almost like, yeah. Like a moving box. Yeah, like a big box. Right, okay.

With a truck inside it. Number three on the list of the top six toys for an adult Happy Meal. Silly, but within reason. A McNugget drone. So it's a big nugget with propellers.

Do you mean? It looks a bit like a nugget, but no, it sits on the table with your box of nuggets and you're? It looks a bit like a nugget, but no. It sits on the table with your box of nuggets, and you're on the couch, and you push a button, and the drone flies you one nugget at a time and lowers it down into your mouth, and you go, and then it flies back and keeps getting you nuggets.

Does it dip? Can it dip? It can dip. But it would have to wait a little, hover above the dip, so there's no drip of the dip. Drip of the dip. And then it's going to have to fly fast. Otherwise, the propellers might cool the nugget

or they might cause the sauce to fly away. Or maybe you have the sauce. You hold the sauce. It arrives. Dips it in there and then dips it in your mouth. Straight into the mouth. Straight into the mouth. These are great future ideas.

It's a great idea. That's for free. Number two on the list of the top six toys for an adult Happy Meal. Silly but within reason. Apple ear tags that look like nuggets. Oh, yeah. So thieves are just like, it's a nugget.

They must have dropped a rogue nugget in their car. That's not a tracking device at all. Nothing to be concerned about. And number one on the list of the top six toys for an adult Happy Meal should it arrive in New Zealand? Silly bit within reason. I asked Hayley and she said it's a Mc Soulja De Niro Brazilian bum bum cream. Yeah.

What is that? A Mc one. It's the cream that everyone wants. It's a rich yet fast absorbing body cream that deeply hydrates the leaps, skin silky soft caffeine rich guarana extract. Visibly smirds and tightens while ACAI. Guarana.

Why do you need to be rubbing V onto your butt? Achai. Actually, you could just have a V bath instead of using the bum bum cream. But if they made this here. That's what Cleopatra used to do in Egyptian times. Have a V bath. A guarana bath. Brazilian nut oils assist in preventing

environmental... Right. Look, if the Brazilians are putting it on their bum-bums... The best bum-bums in the world. Great bum-bums. Ask no further questions, just put the damn

Brazilian bum-bum cream on. Okay. That is today's Slip Socks. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. 30,000 adults between 18 and 75 across 31 countries between December last year and January 5th of this year

were surveyed about their satisfaction in their relationships. And the findings have just been released, as of yesterday, in time for the Day of Love, Valentine's Day. And New Zealand, out of 31 countries, we rank pretty high for relationship satisfaction. Wait, how high? Third. We're also third in another thing I found yesterday.

What about per capita? Because we've got less people than the others above us. Well, it's done by percentages. Oh, yeah. So that gets rid of per capita. Oh, it does. Okay. Yeah, yeah.

What list were we third on yesterday? The most sexual partners. Yeah, we were. Turkey was first, 14 and a half. Australia, 13.2. Us just behind 13. Oh, no, 13.3. We're 13.2.

Is that... Iceland's 13. Iceland's very small. You're definitely accidentally sleeping with a cousin. Iceland's got that app Don't they To check that you're not related Make sure you're not

Your shagging cousin Was that Was that Was that Was that genderless Was that on average Between people Or was that like

Men, women I think that was genderless Yeah Yeah that was genderless How does that stack up For you guys Yeah it sounds about right More than mine

You two didn't comment I felt like I commented And then you two Didn't say anything guys. Yeah, it sounds about right. More than mine. You two didn't comment. I commented and then you two didn't say anything. By the way, this is in total, not per year. Not so far this calendar year. That's so rude. He hasn't denied it. He's just said it's rude. Yeah, I'd say on a monthly basis, I'm

rocking about a 13. A 13? The lowest number of sexual partners. Okay, what countries have... India, China, Vietnam, Hong Kong, Indonesia, then Slovakia, Malaysia. More conservative countries than religious. Germany is 5.8.

Really? Spain is 6.1. Spain? Yeah, what? No, it's too hot though, because you have a nap And then you're like You can't be bothered

Too much paella Slap around in the bath A little bit too much paella Sitting down there Have a couple of sangrias Oh now we're talking So we're third in the world For relationship satisfaction

Tied however With Indonesia, Malaysia and Peru All came out at 83% No 88% Sorry Sat, satisfaction with our relationships. Okay. And in second place above that was the Netherlands with 91%.

The most satisfied with the relationships in the world was Thailand. Okay. 92% of those surveyed said they were satisfied with their relationships. And it puts, we're right up there. of those surveyed said they were satisfied with their relationships. And it puts, we're right up there. 78% of New Zealanders say they feel loved compared to 74% globally. Wait, what do you do with a person

if they don't make you feel loved? Do you think this was eye-opening to people answering this survey? Being like, oh, I'm actually not satisfied at all with my relationship. No. It's time to get a new one. So we're 88% satisfied with our

relationship, with our like spouse, our partner, but only 60% of New Zealanders surveyed said they were happy with their romantic slash sex life. Okay. Interesting. Well, I mean the podcast is out today. Sex.life. Maybe some tips

there to spice up your relationship. Also, if you are older and richer, you are more likely to be more satisfied. Okay. 85% of people in high-income households in New Zealand were satisfied with their relationship compared to 78% in lower income.

That's because you've got a sugar daddy. You're not going to give that up, are you? Absolutely not. Talk a bit of privilege. Absolutely not. Well, there you go Talk a bit of privilege. Absolutely not. Well, there you go. I mean, satisfaction. We should be happy.

I think that's quite good for us, considering we don't rank that highly in the happiness countries in the world. No, that's weird, isn't it? But at home, with our SOs... It must be work. Happy is Larry, and Larry is a very... Must be work. Dragging it down

that's the only that's the only thing it could be isn't it work yeah that's why those rich people are satisfied because they don't

have to work no they're already rich well I'm I'm satisfied with my work life very much and my work husbands it's a beautiful

beautiful relationship you guys satisfied as well anything else I could do to make this a more satisfying environment? I was trying to communicate.

It's nice to be asked. Yeah. Anything I could do? Anything I could provide? It's fine. There's no problems. Fine. Fine.

Great, robust chat. It'll do. It'll do. It's fine. It's fine. Play ZM's Fletchford and Hayley. Play ZM. Fletchford and Hayley, silly little pole, silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole,

silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Silly little pole, which pillow do you sleep on? The one matching your sheets, the one matching the duvet, or it matches neither? That'll be your silk pillow people. Your silk pillow people. Okay. Now, it should always match the sheets because you wash them every weekend. You wash them every I wash them every weekend.

But you don't want to be washing your duvet pillow because then because you don't wash your duvet cover as much as you wash your pillows and then they fade

and then you'll have mix matched pillow cases to your duvet. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is very well thought out in our house. Well, we're in the majority.

Are we? Okay, good. Thank God. 65%, no, no, no, no. This is very well thought out in our house. Well, we're in the majority. Are we? Okay, good. Oh, thank God. 65% of people said the one matching my sheets. Second, it matches neither at 18%. And 17%, the one matching my duvet. Silk pillows are so ugly, though. That's why I wear a silk bonnet,

because you just put the silk on your head. Oh, yeah, if you're worried about ugly. Either way, I think it's ugly. You put the silk on your head and not, yeah, if you're worried about ugly. Either way, I think it's ugly. You put the silk on your head and not your bed, you know? And then you don't have to have a look at your bed with, like, a big ugly silk pillowcase. Tessa said, I have attachment issues. Since my mum threw out my blankie when I was little, I've replaced the attachment to my satin pillowcase.

I've had to have one since I was eight, and I'm 31 now. A satin pillowcase. A satin pillowcase. No way had to have one since I was eight and I'm 31 now. A satin pillowcase. No way, it's too slippy. I inherited my parents' satin sheets. Where are the satin sheets? They bang, eh? They had cream satin sheets and I think my mum hated them.

And so when I got a queen bed when I was like 11 or something, I got them and I always just remember the sound of my heels. Yeah, dry heels. Cracking my head with a satin. Yeah, that's grim. Yeah, it's grim. Ali said, I think the premium pillow for sleeping

deserves the exciting patent case that matched the duvet. No. No. No, I don't think so. Are you washing your duvet every week? Well, the reason we talk about this is producer Jared brought this up. You thought everybody was doing the duvet pillow. Yeah.

It's the more comfortable pillow. Is it because it's right there? It's right on the top. My duvet pillow holds the cold better than my non-duvet pillow. Switch it around. Switch it around. We put our sleeping pillows in the pillows we need to sleep on. Yeah.

Yeah, I don't know. The duvet pillow is just a cheap pillow. The duvet pillow is a shit pillow. It's a shit pillow. It's a shit pillow. It's a cotton-filled fluff. It's filler. It's filler.

Your memory foam's in your sheet-covered one. Yeah, exactly. But then when you get into bed, you've got to flip them around. Oh, my God. No, do you sleep on two pillows? Yeah. Oh, my God. Here's an idea.

One pillow, but it's thick enough. No, thank you. No two pillows? Yeah. Oh my God. Here's an idea. One pillow, but it's thick enough. No, thank you. No, no, no. I do a two, but you just put the shit one, the filler at the back. Do you? Yeah.

Two pillows. Grow up. Grow up. One's feather and one's memory foam and it's a delightful combination. Yeah, that's my combo. But the feather, no, but you've got to put your memory foam

in your sheet one. Trust me, you'll never look back. Memory foam is in the sheet one. It's really- The pillow is in the duvet one. But why are you sleeping on your memory foam underneath your sheet one. Trust me, you'll never look back. Memory foam is in the sheet one. It's really... The pillow is in the duvet one. But why are you sleeping on your memory foam underneath a feather? Because the memory foam just props up

the very squashed feather pillow. You need to squish them around. You need to squish them around. Okay. Ada says, what monster doesn't have their pillowcases that match their sheets? Duvet pillows are for looks

and never for sleeping on. Yes. That is a great summary. Alex, girl, I sleep on a silk pillowcase and wear it a cosy living cry and thus I only have one pillow. Okay, that's fair. That's fair, Alex. There's some good sales on where a new pillow would be like $10.

I reckon you could save that for... I think it would be a junk pillow for $10. Yeah. I think you'd struggle to find a good pillow for $10. I need a new pillow. I need it to be thicker. I'm ready for a new pillow. I've got a struggle to find a good pillow for $10. I need a new pillow. I need it to be thicker. I'm ready for your pillow. I've got a little bit of this going on while I sleep.

Because I've got such broad shoulders. You would look at me and think, those are the shoulders carrying the weight of not only the show, but also my household at home. I quite often wonder if he's a rower. Do you ever, when he walks in, think, he's a dragon boater. You're a big barrel-chested bitch.

That's what people say to me when I walk in. I say, have you just come from the lake? Yeah. Rowing quite often. Oh, no, I do that one. It's the sea rowing. Did you get hit? How did you get to work today?

Oh, do you? I rode. I rode. You rode. I ran to the harbour and then rode the rest of the way. Okay. Yeah. Natasha says the one that matches the duvet usually has a design or stitching on it.

That's uncomfortable. It's scratching my face. Do you know in my spare room, if people come and stay, I take the duvet pillows and put them all onto the side so they know not to sleep on them? Yeah, you've confiscated the pillow. I confiscate the duvet pillow. And that says to them, these aren't for sleeping on.

No, I'm not going to wash these. Because some people have done that. Oh, disgusting. And it puts my day out. Oh, it's a sheet. Yeah. I do wonder. Never on the duvet ones,

then you don't need to wash them as often, or ever. They are a decorative pillow, says Rhiannon. You wash them at once in a blue moon. Rhiannon's a great person. She gets it. Try pillow for life.

Oh. Ugly. It says Becca, but I think it means Nana. Try pillow for life. I don't care what the haters say. Try pillows are the best. They are legitimately so good.

When I lived with Aaron's parents, when I first moved to Auckland, they had try pillows and I was always like, oh gosh. Body pillow. Get a body pillow and a normal pillow.

I gave the body pillow a good spurning last night. Yeah, good. Yeah, it was really neat. Because it's Valentine's Day. Is that why? Yeah. Nikki says,

I am shocked who the heck is sleeping on the one that matches the sheets. Nikki. What? The majority of people. Oh, is sleeping on the one that matches the sheets. Nikki. What? The majority of people. Oh, Nikki, you're in a minority here. Wake up, Nikki.

Stop being a sheeple. Yeah, sheeple. Wake up, sheeple. No, because she's the sheeple. We're the sheeple. Yeah, because we're the minority. Majority. Yeah.

Wake up and follow the sheeple. Yeah. Yeah. Come on, join the flock. Yeah. The Lord's flock. For the Lord is our shepherd. sheeple. Yeah. Yeah. Come on, join the flock. Yeah. The Lord's flock. For the Lord is our shepherd. Follow us.

Okay. And the Lord is Tammy from Briscoes, and she is saying there is a pillow sale. Buy yourself a new pillow. Yes. Match it with the sheets. Get some sheets on it. Match it with the sheets,

and then sleep on that goddamn thing. It's Valentine's Day today, and we thought next on the show we would catch up. Someone said, someone just texted me... Is it bad my pillows don't have cases on at all? Oh! Yellow!

We've got our common enemy. Yellow! Yellow! We've all just got our common enemy. We're going to catch up with economist Brad Olson next with some stats on Valentine's Day. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. It is Valentine's Day. Happy Valentine's Day.

And if there's one person I know who won't be spending money this Valentine's Day, it's Bad News Brad. And he joins us on the phone. Good morning, Brad. Good morning. Oh, I thought Brad was going to be in studio. Oh. I thought we were going to go out and have a little brunch afterwards.

Guys, I might have a better offer than you. What? Oh. You son of a bitch. What did you just say to me? I'm sorry. On Valentine's Day, Brad? You've got a valentine?

Look, I don't, but I'd be glad to think I could. Brad, you are one of the best people we know. You can be our Valentine. Do you seriously have a better offer? No, I don't. But I will tell you that that's probably what a lot of people are going to be doing. I mean, you look at the sort of money that people spend on Valentine's Day. Some people seem to go all out from the moment they wake up

to the moment they go back to sleep, hopefully on the right side of their pillow. Seamless transition from a little bit of friendly intro banter into his content. This guy is a professional. He knows what he's doing. But wait, does your pillow match the sheets or the duvet? Sheets, absolutely.

Thank you, Brad. That is why you are our valentine. He's a good boy. Now, give us some stats for Valentine's Day. Are Kiwis spending, do you think they're going to spend more or less? In the lead up, have they been spending more? Well, they generally do spend quite a lot more on the day. So if you look back to sort of 2019, because the last couple of years, Valentine's Day has been

a little bit disrupted either by pandemics or wild weather. The likes of 2019, Kiwi spent about $10 million more on Valentine's Day than the previous day of the week before. So yep, quite a bit more. Funnily enough, we spend a lot on flowers. Florist spending was up. It was nearly four times higher than normal. A lot of money as well on watches and jewellery, up around 70%. But the biggest actual dollar spend,

we do a lot, a big amount, a big increase in eating out on Valentine's Day. More restaurant and cafe spending. Sort of the big other area with about $3 million of that $10 million extra coming from people going out for a nice dinner, a nice brunch, a nice something. Well, you've got a book so far in advance. It must be a massively

busy day for restaurants. Oh, absolutely. But let's be clear, I think that a fair few operators obviously make a fair bit of money from Valentine's Day, so also jack up the prices. We've also seen quite a few people, though, that have said, particularly in the last couple of years, we've seen quite a few people that are often doing a bit of a meal at home. You're coming up with some sort of nice dinner option that you're going to cook for your partner.

But the other sort of interesting ones when you look through, a little bit more spending on the likes of bookshops, also more taxi spending. I think that's because probably both partners want to have a drink if they're going out rather than just one. So, I mean, lots of love but also lots of taxidermies. Absolutely. Oh, my gosh.

Wow. That is so much money, isn't it? We've, I've never. 10 million. Brad, you know out of anyone, I love to spend money. And blame it on me. And blame it on you. You put me into this position.

But I've never spent money on Valentine's Day. Like, you know, in the 13 years with Aaron, we just don't do it. You're not really big gift people, though, are you? No, not really. They just buy what they want. Just buy like stuffed taxidermy foxes. And I don't think that goes to inventive pornography. I don't know that that goes to the stats that Brad gets.

I mean, I think it's interesting. You talk to some people and of course, you know, some people's love language is gift giving. And so, you know, they go big on the flowers and everything else. But other people that I've talked to sort of go, you know, I'd love some flowers, but just some nice supermarket ones. It's the thought that counts,

not the spending necessarily that makes a big difference. But I mean, look, that depends on the partner that you've got or the partner you're trying to woo. There's a lot of options out there depending on who you are and what your budget is. Brad, I yesterday saw a potted... What are those nice flowers I like? Lilies.

What are those ones that, nah, nah, nah, nah. It was in a pot. It grows on a tree. It's a tropical flower. Oh. Hibiscus? No, but you're kind of on the right track. Is it the one that looks like a bird's head thing?

No, I've got one of those, a bird of paradise. Oh, okay. I don't know, but you saw one. You've got to keep them warm. You can keep them in a pot. What is it? My mum's favourite flower. I don't...

Who cares? I thought... Where I'm going with this is that you can get a potted plant for the same price as a bunch of flowers. It lasts. Oh, yeah. That's a good idea. It's not about lasting, though.

Brad's talking about spending money regardless. No, I'm just getting more bang for your buck. I mean, look, I like the economic thinking there. It's a sort of, you know, I've talked to a few people in recent days, just to, you know, try and get a bit of a quiz, who's contributing to the spending and who's not. And some people have taken what I'd sort of almost regard as an economic view of things and gone,

well, if I wait like a week afterwards, same sort of flowers, but a whole lot cheaper. That's what producer Jared's doing. He's booked a Valentine's date not on Valentine's. I mean, that's very smart. I mean, it also depends on what the person wants. I mean, for you, for example, a new machine part for your

tractor, for example, would be the most exciting thing ever. Oh, you just roused him, Brad. Brad, Brad. Oh, my God. Jeep is great. Stop flirting, Brad. Brad. Now we're talking. Brad, as someone who's very smart with money,

how are you celebrating Valentine's Day? Oh, well, I mean, look, for me to know and you guys to find out, but look, at the moment, look, it's always important, I think, every now and then to sometimes participate in these sort of economic trends. I can analyse them as much as I want, but sometimes you've got to have a little bit more skin in the game.

So perhaps I might have done some spending. It's the most romantic thing you've ever said. Yeah. A bit more skin in the game. Love it. Fran Japani. Fran Japani was it. Okay, yeah, right.

Beautiful flower. That's one of my favourites. Chief Executive and Principal Economic Economist, Brad Austin. Hakuna Matata-ist. Hakuna and Principal Economist Brad Austin. Hakuna Matata-ist. Hakuna Matata-ist. Eco-mist. Did I get that title right, Brad? You're the one that keeps...

That was so good, please. You go every nine minutes and keep the flies up. He's the Principal Eco-mist. Eco-mist. Thank you so much for sharing your wise knowledge with us on Valentine's Day. And happy Valentine's Day. Same to you. Thank you.

All right, a couple of minutes away from seven. Because it is Valentine's Day, it is the launch of your season two podcast, Hayley. Sex.life. It's out now. And joining us in studio soon, your co-host Morgan Penn to chat about this and also how to spice things up on Valentine's Day. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, happy Valentine's Day.

Very exciting day, not only because we're celebrating love in general, but because it is season two of Sex.Life launch day and Morgan Penn is in studio with us. Morgz! Now, the episode has already dropped on iHeartRadio or wherever you listen to your podcasts. Yeah.

I mean, if you can resist running right now because we're still doing the radio shows. After the radio show. After the radio show. Go and listen to episode one of the new season of Sex.Life, our podcast, which is just such a pleasure to do with you. Oh, it's a pleasure to do with you. The pleasure is all mine.

Now, for those who don't know, season one was all about your time at an underground rural sex school in New Zealand. Yeah. What is season two? Yeah. People were pretty shocked about that, right? That I would be humping the ground

just at a little township. Right over the fence. And so I thought, you know what? I think we should all learn what is actually going on in New Zealand, right under our noses. That the kink community especially, that's where I've really dived into this time, what they're up to.

Old Vanilla Smith could learn a few things here in this season. Well, speaking of Vanilla. Look at his face. I'm just listening. I'm just here to enjoy. I'm here to enjoy Morgan's stories. Speaking of Vanilla, it doesn't matter. They like sprinkles.

Speaking of Vanilla, I think we're going to do a little extra podcast, the three of us with Morgan, talking, ranking our sex positions. That's a podcast special because we know that it's... It's not for on-air. Not for on-air. But spoiler alert, missionary Vaughan Smith, number one. It is a fantastic position. Ladies and gentlemen, that's the final position.

But ahead of going and listening to our podcast, we thought we'd chat with Morgan, because it's Valentine's Day today, about how we can keep Valentine's Day fun and spicy whether you're in a brand new relationship where the romance is like on tap and it's still fizzing and delightful and new and exciting and also if you're in a relationship that perhaps has lasted 13 years for example out of the wild and perhaps, you know, romance doesn't take it. It's, you know, the first priority. Yeah, yeah, I understood.

On behalf of a friend. Still or sparkling. Yeah, still or sparkling. I could probably answer that if you've been with someone 13 years. Just get an Airbnb with your friends you work with and then have really loud sex. Okay, okay.

Did you know that when we were at the wedding yeah oh my god I didn't hear anything it was after you two left the house I was asleep

did you do it in a bedroom yes wow anyway side thought side thought Sade heard it I know and did that

peak anything for her she thought they were watching a National Geographic documentary around the watering hole you know where there's a whole bunch of different animals.

The dawn chorus of an African waterhole. I'm proud of you, Hayley. We love noises. We love noises. We love noises. We celebrate authentic noises. Okay, let's start with if you're in a fresh and exciting new relationship this Valentine's Day,

like what would be a good idea to celebrate? Yeah, well... Keeping in mind as well that not a lot of people Okay, let's start with if you're in a fresh and exciting new relationship this Valentine's Day. Like, what would be a good idea to celebrate? Keeping in mind as well that not a lot of people have money at the moment. No, that's right. And you don't want to bust your fuffle valve either because you might go... Wait, where's the fuffle valve? I know men have two and we've got three, but which one's the fuffle valve? Fuffle valve. Is this just a made up, is this like a family?

Is it under the gooch? It's under the gooch. Yeah. Okay, I've done a real doozy on myself by whipping that out. I'm sorry. What I meant was you don't want to go and blow your load too early. Okay. Because I'm looking up the illustrated history of the foo-foo valve,

which was made by a Kiwi inventor. Okay. Save it for your fact of the foo-foo valve, which was made by a Kiwi inventor. Save it for your fact of the day. Because, right, if you're in an early relationship, you don't want one person to go hard out and go extravagant and you not meet them there. One, because of money, or two, because

of your excitement for the day. So just get on the same page with each other. Talk about it. Do you like Valentine's Day? Do you celebrate it? What should we do together? Like make it a... Yeah, there's nothing worse than like you giving like a voucher for a cuddle and them

giving you like a diamond bracelet. And it's like, okay, I didn't realize we were quite there. Yeah, yeah. But like cash in on the fact that it's an early relationship. So you're obviously probably feeling pretty horny for each other. There's a lot of like that sexual energy that's still there. So keep that alive, you know. Before it wilts.

Yeah, pretty much. Oh my God, no, that sounds so bad, doesn't it? Or it just becomes harder work to keep it fizzing. Yes, yes. But I think this is a good chance to be creative and have a lot of fun and set the tone for the relationship of what you would actually like it to be. You know, so like I love a good like treasure hunt.

Oh! You know? Because if you can kind of, if it's the early days, you can kind of see what kind of relationship it's going to be. Is it going to be really fun or is it serious or like, you know, go for a beach date if that's what you guys are like, if you're outdoorsy people. Go to a, I don't know, Fletcher, you go to spin classes,

don't you, with your friends? Oh, hot. God, hold me back. That's a friend. That's just working out. You were saying there was a hot person at the gym. A boy. He was, wasn't he?

He was not. When is there not a hot person at Fletcher's gym? Let's be honest. If Hayley goes to the same gym, you'd back that up. There's always hot people. I'll stand by that. But you could make the whole day sexy, right? You could send sexy voice

notes to each other because you're probably both at work so get the fire burning for when you're going to see each other later. Bit of suspense. Yes, it's the tease. You started the fire. Get the simmering going because you don't just want to like, oh, once you see each other at the end of the day, it's all on.

Wham, bam. Like use the whole day. I like that. A long tease. Exciting day. Sex.life is launching today, season two. And Morgan. Episode one is out now, by the way, right now.

But stay with us now because we've got Morgan. Yeah. And we've talked about how to keep things spicy in a new relationship with this Valentine's Day. about how to keep things spicy in a new relationship with this Valentine's Day. What about people who have been in a long relationship? Well, I actually think this is a really good opportunity to reset. Like if you're looking at your relationship and you're going,

you know, we don't say sweet things to each other anymore. We don't leave love notes in each other's lunchbox anymore. You know, we're barely having sex. Like this is such a good, like, okay, let's use this day and let's do something different. Make an occasion. Because it kind of is a day where you can do things that people wouldn't normally do.

I'm talking consensually. With the foo-foo valve. The fuffle valve. The fuffle valve. It's an actual saying. Wow. But... With the foo-foo valve. Well, good. But I also think, you know, quite often we forget The fuckhole. It's an actual saying. Wow.

Well, good. But I also think, you know, quite often we forget what we used to love about our partner, what used to spark the fire. So think about that and maybe go and reinvent one of your first dates. Oh, that's a nice idea. I often say to partners that aren't having much sex or their sex is very routine, like, what used to excite you? Tell me your most hottest memory.

And people always remember it. And the couples are quite shocked by each other. And then they go, oh, what did you like about that? And then you use that piece of what was actually exciting. And then you can replicate it. Aaron could take you back to that black mold flat in Wellington. Oh, my God, yes. Yeah, that would be beautiful. When I put my hands up against the wall,

but that slipped because the walls were wet. Oh. Condensation. Yeah. Yeah, that's hot. And you were having sex mostly to keep warm because it was so cold in there. Yeah.

No, I can think of my hottest, our hottest session. Yeah. Do you think that's something you could replicate now? No, I can think of my hottest, our hottest session. Yeah. Do you think that's something you could replicate now? With more of a public profile. It might be. Okay, interesting. I don't know if Fox and Beach is ready for that.

No, no, no, not that one. Not that one? Had a mini Bell palsy but I I can she went blind it was so good she went blind oh yes

I've heard this one yeah yeah yeah anyway anyway anyway I like this because you're not

just drawing from some kind of idea of of Hollywood or you know what you've read in a cosmopolitan you're going

this worked for us once yeah let's recreate it we are still those same people. Absolutely. That is amazing advice from you. Should we put out a public health warning for Fox and Beach though,

or is it okay still? There's an algae bloom. There's an algae bloom. Tufts of algae bloom. Something's blooming. Seafood is not to be shellfish and not to be collected. Yeah.

Just a ban for two weeks. Well, if I might add a suggestion to be very seamless here. If you need to turn up the spice today with your partner, perhaps tune in to episode one of Sex.Life with your partner. Listen together. Get inspired. There's home play again this season. There's all sorts of saucy sage advice.

It'll definitely set the mood. Yeah. For a sexy time. And I tell you what, if you wanted to buy a little gift as well, we've got a sponsor this year, wildsecrets.co.nz and we've got an amazing 20% discount code. So you could buy them a little gift and say, hey, go on wildsecrets.co.nz, pick

a little toy for yourself, use sex.life at the checkout and you get 20% off. That's the promo code, sex.life. And the first episode is out now, iHeartRadio or wherever you podcast, and they'll be out every hump day, every Wednesday. Check it out. And I've emailed the Hora Whenua Council and there's a rahui on Fox and Beach. Posthumously.

Fantastic. Morgan Penn, thank you so much. And you can check out our extra podcast special as well for a saucy final rankings episode. Mmm, pizzicioni. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley's Secret Slurp.

Secret Slurp, it's your chance to win a Stanley Quencher So what is... It's lumpy What is Vaughan... It's very lumpy What is Vaughan sucking up the straw? Now we've got Anna for the first guess Good morning Anna, welcome to Secret Slurp Hey guys

What do you think it is? Is it custard? Oh, no. It's lumpier. I reckon it's definitely lumpier. More lumpier. Thank you for your guess. Anna, Michelle, what do you think?

Good morning, team. Good morning. I'm guessing tinned spaghetti. Oh! No. You'd have to have a good aim with the thick straw to get the tail end of the skiddy. That is a thick little straw to get a skiddy, though.

I reckon you'd get two skiddies up at once. Thank you. Harley, what do you think? Lumpier again, lumpier again. Hi, I think it's yoghurt. Oh, no! It's not. I think we'll give a clue.

Thank you, Harley. It's not. The clue'll give a clue Thank you Harley It's not The clue is Watching Vaughn I can see that he's Using a lot of energy Yeah To suck up this substance

Slurp it up But luckily What he's slurping Is a very Good slow release Source of energy anyway A good breakfast Source of energy

Great Great Yeah That's not how you slurp That's my clue I mean that's slurp. That's my clue. I mean, that's, yeah. Megan, what do you think? Tapioca pearls?

Oh, yeah. No. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. Tapioca. We don't tapioca. That would be the same kind of sound, though, wouldn't it? It would be like, bup, bup, bup, bup, bup. Okay.

A bit more like jelly. No, it's not. Thank you, Megan. More rustic. More rustic. Natalie, what do you think? Vaughan is slurping. Maybe a smoothie?

A smoothie? No, not a smoothie. No, it's a lot more lumpier. Clumpier. More lumpier. Carrie, welcome to Secret Slurp. Good morning. Good morning.

What do you think Vaughan is slurping? Porridge. Bingo. Yay! He's ruined my big thick straw, I tell you what. It's going to need a rinse. It's going to need a little pipe cleaner down the middle. Yeah, well.

It sticks to the side. It does. We had to add a bit more milk to that, didn't we? More milk than his preference. During the ad break. Carrie, congratulations. You have won a big Quencher Stanley Cup. Well done.

Yay! Thank you, folks. Yay! That was a great yay. I mean, it big Quencher Stanley Cup. Well done. Yay. Yay. That was a great yay. I mean, it's not a born yay, that one. Oh, yay. I mean, it's not $100,000 of secret sound, is it? But it's asking, yeah? Yeah, it's going to make you very cool on TikTok.

Yeah. Well done. Secret Slurp back again tomorrow. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. The Instagram stories have started. People leaving on flights to Melbourne for the end of the week. And we have tickets to the Sydney Airers portion of the tour.

The last chance for you to win those tickets, flights, tickets accommodation, is tomorrow with our very last Taylor Thursday. I'm actually listening from 6am. Every Taylor Swift song you hear between then and 5.30 in the afternoon with Brianne Clint gives you a chance to go in the draw to see her live. And she released more tickets yesterday too.

What did they just build some more stadium or something? They built more stadium. They must have built more stadium or something, right. They must have built more stadium. I think you can take your little white plastics. Cheers. Oh, your little warehouse

$12. $12, yeah. Okay. God, would you check that in? You'd have to put it in one of those big bags to get over to Australia with it. Yeah.

Oh, that's a good call, actually. Or do you just go to Bunnings? I'd probably go one. When you're there. Go to Bunnings and get one, yeah. Okay. Well, speaking of major events,

the Super Bowl was Monday. Just a couple of days ago. Monday, our time. And we talked a little bit on Monday about how bloody expensive

it was. $11,000 being the average ticket price. Remember we sent a foreign correspondent over, didn't we? We did.

And that cost a bloody arm and a leg. And he was saying how much even the cheap seats were. Yeah, somehow he managed to sniff a seat though and get one in. But some people online have apparently, apparently said that they got in by wearing Sky Sport passes and logoed T-shirts.

But they didn't. And that they snuck in and they didn't pay for-shirts. But they didn't. And that they snuck in and they didn't pay for a ticket. But they didn't work for Sky Sports. No, no, no. They were just like people. And they shared a photo saying 10K my ass. Yeah. And then like their Sky Sport logos and their branded stuff,

but they don't work for them. So you wouldn't have a seat. You'd just be roaming the stadium, the whole kind of thing. Arguably better though. Those stadiums are huge. Yeah. The majority of people there have have a seat. You'd just be roaming the stadium, the whole kind of thing. Arguably better, though, those stadiums are huge. Yeah. The majority of people there have a bad seat. We were talking about this as well, because the Super Bowl halftime show is filmed specifically for television.

Yeah. And apparently when you're there watching the actual show, it's terrible because you can't see a thing and they don't have big screens. Well, they don't have the big screens up streaming it because it would be like a second behind. And it would ruin the shots. Oh, right, okay. So there'd be a delay and they don't have big screens? Well, they don't have the big screens up streaming it because it would be like a second behind. And it would ruin the shots. Oh, right.

So it would be a delay and it's big and bright so it would take the attention off. Probably when everyone's using the toilet and buying

overpriced chips anyway. Yeah, exactly. They're like, oh, we'll just watch it on YouTube with everyone else afterwards.

Yeah. Anyway, I mean, everyone was applauding them on the internet being like, hell yeah, go you, nice move. So cynical though.

Like, do you reckon they actually just bought tickets and then it was their idea to make a TikTok? A viral thing. I mean, look, we're talking about it. Walked right into it, didn't we? Absolutely. I don't know if it's true or not.

I know people do this sometimes at concerts in New Zealand and they'll wear those, you know, the red and yellow security guys that stand at the front. Red badge? Yeah, yeah, those. I know people that have snuck in and done that before. Oh, wow. No names, no names.

No names. Anyway, I wanted to know whether this is true or not. It has sparked a question for me, for our listeners. When did you sneak in somewhere and how did you do it? Illegal activity can be shared, but we shall do it anonymous. I don't know if this would be considered illegal. Because you can get away with a lot in a high-vis vest. If you see someone in a high-vis vest, you don't think twice about it.

A shenanigans vest. You're just like, oh, they're fixing something. They're delivering something. They're working here. You don't think twice about it. You know, a guy pulled up into my drive yesterday. Are we talking about this later? Yeah, we are talking about this later. Stay tuned. A guy pulled up in my driveway

yesterday and I'm just realising he might not have been who he said he was. He could have just been wearing a branded thing and just wandering around my property. Exactly. Okay, so 0800Diles.im Give us a call. We want to take your calls now. You text 9696. When did you sneak in somewhere and how the hell did you do it?

We want to know where you snuck in and how you did it because two people online are claiming that they snuck into the Super Bowl by wearing Sky Sport merch and little pass cards and stuff. Wild, because there isn't even Sky Sport in America, right? Like, there's Sky Sport in the UK, Aussie, and New Zealand. And they had the UK had people there. Yeah, right. And security just like, ah.

Yeah. I mean, we're certainly not encouraging, we will say, any of this behaviour. Because if you're caught, you're facing action, right? Like, you're basically sneaking into an event. I mean, it's kind of like... You were looking at three law-abiding citizens here. Yeah, it's kind of like concert shoplifting, isn't it? It is a little bit.

It's event shoplifting. You are. You're stealing a little bit from Taylor Swift or whoever you snuck into. And you wouldn't download a concert. You wouldn't download a handbag. You wouldn't download a handbag. No, you wouldn't.

You wouldn't steal a car. So 0800-DARLS-AT-M-9696. Where did you sneak in? What did you sneak into? Chris? What did you sneak into? Chris, what did you sneak into? Yeah, good morning, team. Love your show. Oh, thank you.

Love you. Love you. Happy Christmas Day. We love you, Chris. I don't really know Chris that well to say I love you straight away. No, sometimes the heart has an instant connection with someone. Okay, we love you too, Chris. Yeah.

Okay. Well, I'm not a bad person, but when we were younger growing up in the west coast of the South Island, we'd all want to go to the movies, right? So one person would buy a ticket and then as it got darker, the person would go down and open the emergency exit and let the other 10 people in. Did they not have, those are alarms. The west coast one didn't have an alarm on that door. No, mate, I'm talking 35, 40 years ago in those days

there was no security, no access control. It was like, just wait till it got dark, sneak down to the side door, open that up, let the other tenant in, close the door and sit down and watch a movie. It's well down in the South West Coast, isn't it? Would everybody pitch in for that one movie ticket? No, no, the person, we just rotated.

Oh, your shift. Yeah, each week somebody had to pay for the ticket and then leave the other tenant. What if it was a big blockbuster though, like a Jurassic Park back in the day and it was all sold out, would you just sit on the floor? No, no, we chose our movies and we waited, like if it was a blockbuster, we'd wait a few weeks until it...

This is a well thought out plan, Chris. Yeah, and we would see people, you know, queuing up, so we'd know, like, that movie might have to wait a couple of days to do it. And no one ever knocked on you? No, no, never got caught. I love that. A few Jeffers getting thrown around, but, you know, that's about it. But we were, you know, pretty, pretty, pretty skinned in those days

growing up on the West Coast. I love that. Amazing. Chris, thank you. Anonymous, you and your co-workers snuck in somewhere. Yes, we did. It was the end of year function and it was a giant event centre. Our function was getting a little boring,

so we pretended to be cleaners for another company and we snuck in and watched the Top Twins live. We love the Top Twins. Oh, we love the Top Twins. The Top Twins. Someone else had a private function and they were rich enough to afford the Top Twins. Yeah, it was a big, well-known company, won't say who. Yeah.

And we said we were the new cleaners and I think it was like Janice and Bob or something really, really crazy. But how did you the new cleaners, and I think it was like Janice and Bob or something really, really crazy. But how did you dress as cleaners? No, well, because everyone was dressing fancy for the Top Twins, you see. Right. And we were staying at the complex, so we went and got changed into some nice gear, got in there, and we had some very fancy desserts,

and it was a great night. Look at you in the eight! Oh, no, you got dessert, you got dessert as well. You got dessert down eight. Amazing. With the Top Twins. We're trying to be alive. We've got some sneakers well. Amazing. With the top twins. We're trying to be alive. We've got some sneakers on our hands.

We've got some absolute sneakers. Where did you sneak in and how did you do it is the question. Because two people snuck into the Super Bowl apparently. Pretending to be Sky Sport employees. Yeah, exactly. No, they weren't. Very ballsy. Big event.

Especially to make a uniform. Huge security. You'll love this text, Hayley. My step-mom and her friend snuck into a Queen after-party back in the day and got to see Freddie Mercury up close before they got kicked out. I just got goosebumps up my spine. He seems like, because he's dead now, but it seems like one of those people that if you saw him in real life,

it wouldn't seem real. He'd be short, eh? He's short, eh? How tall was Freddie Mercury? I don't think he was particularly tall, but I don't think he was particularly small. I think he was just a man. He loved other men.

Right, okay. He was five foot nine. Oh, okay. Okay, so he's a bit shorter than me. Yeah. Oh, wow. Crazy. Seeing him in real life would be so weird.

Caroline, where did you sneak into? So we wanted to go to the Exponents concert at the Pounamu in Auckland. Is the Pounamu still around? It's definitely had a name change, eh? I think it's had a name change, yeah. Yeah, this was right in the 90s, sort of early 2000s I think. Can we just have a quick thoughts and prayers for the Pounamu? What a spot. Was it? What a spot.

But yeah, so they have a fence along there and my partner at the time was 6'7". What a spot! What a spot! And so he picks me up, but he throws me over the fence. And I land just about on these people who are dancing because they've already started. And I just made this grand entrance. And I'm like, oh, hi, I'm here. And I just start dancing. They're like, what the heck? And it took him a while to get in himself because the security was, you know, controlling the area. So I was sort of standing on my own front, dancing away, having a good time. Did you get caught?

No, absolutely not. But I nearly knocked a few people out, but they were all like, what the heck? That's all right. They just cleared the way. Right, and big mate just climbed over because he's taller than the fence. Yeah. Yeah, and I thought he was going to break the fence,

but he got in and no one said anything. They were just laughing because, you know, he's a soldier flying out of nowhere. Yeah. I think, yeah, if someone's going to go to that much effort, I'm just like, okay, yeah, no one's knocking on you. Emma, what did you sneak into?

I sneaked into a private box in Mount Eden, a stadium, like 22 years ago. I was taken to a rugby game and I didn't really watch rugby

because I came from, you know, overseas and we never had rugby. Yeah. And I was really bored and I was like, I'm going to go out for a wander. So I walked into this private box and food was there. Everything was like big party.

And this guy came to me and said, come in and have some food. And I saw the phone on the floor and he literally said to me, you can call anyone you want. It's all free. And I sat on the phone and dialed my family overseas. And I had the best friend, and I was literally spent the entire game talking to, let's say, a country in Eastern Europe. You ran overseas?

Yeah, and then this kind of few years later, I saw this guy. I'm not going to name him because he was very well-known, various, you know. And I said to my friend, this is the guy who told me to cool overseas. And they just thought I was mad. I was making it up. I said, oh, my God, that's him.

And he was, you know, one of the rugby players. But I literally, like, spent all my time talking to, you know, overseas country from private box. You're just calling home. You can call anyone you like from in here. We're a bit posh. Yeah, because, like, there was no toll bar on the phone or something. You know, like, I just started dialing and it actually worked.

And I was like, oh, my God, I should call someone else. When you did have to pay to call home, how much would it cost you to call home? I don't know, because it used to be like a dollar something a minute special rate from home. I don't know what they had, but I literally just

dialed one number and it worked and I was like, oh well, I'll dial someone else. And we started talking and next thing you know, the game was over. I was like, oh, well, I'll dial someone else. And we started talking and next thing you know, the game was over. I was like, oh my God, I'd be like, how in the fuck? I love that. Some poor corporate box owner got

a bill for like a thousand dollars. I was running this mysterious phone bill to Eastern Europe. There was no mobile phone. Nothing could be recorded. I just literally walked in. It was so easy and I was like, okay. I want to know.

Everyone was puzzled because honestly, we had a soccer back home. We don't have rugby. I kind of wasn't into it. Can we make Emma our Caller of the Week please? I'm obsessed with this story. Emma, our Caller of the Week. Well done. You won a $50 McCafe voucher thanks, our caller of the week. Well done. You've won a $50 McCafe voucher thanks to our mates at McCafe. Well done.

You might want to share that around with the people who's boxed you, bloody. We're going to put you on hold. You tell the producers, I don't know, two things. What country you're calling and what All Black, like what famous rugby player gave you the phone and said have at it. We won't share. We won't share. Thanks, Emma. Wait, there are some messages in

about where you're stuck into places. Someone said, my job back in the big day out days was to stop people sneaking into the big day out. Oh, yeah. It was quite easy because there's so many entrances to Mount Smart. The most brazen one they saw was somebody parked their car close to the fence, got out a battery-powered angle grinder, walked up to the fence, top to bottom, slit the fence open, everybody walked in, and then they just put the battery thing back in their car

and the angle grinder back in their car and walked in. Jeepers. Oh, my God. Because that would cut through one of those fences. Yeah, totally. It's just like a wire fence. Going. I've snuck into a wedding, been there for hours,

pretending I was a distant cousin, even had some wedding cake before somebody was just like hey I was just talking to your dad. And they were like it's time for me to leave. Oh my god. What? An actual wedding crasher? Yeah. Wow. My brother snuck into the All Blacks after party after they won the

World Cup in Japan. That'd be good. That'd be quite fun. I'd sneak into the locker room. Why? Just to give them to say congrats, great game. Okay, yep. Loved all the goals and the tries. We pulled up to R&V on a quad bike and we were all in high-vis vests. A couple of people had clipboards.

They just opened the gate for us and we just drove in. Clipboards? Clipboard in a high-vis? Yeah, see, that sounds official, doesn't it? Yeah, it does. Just, yeah, sneaking. We, doesn't it? Yeah, it does. Just, yeah. Sneaking. We've got some sneaky sneakies.

Play ZM's Fletch for the daily. Play ZM. Cross now to producer Jared, who was telling us this morning something that happened at the supermarket, and he's broken supermarket etiquette here. He has. What have you done now, Jared? I really should know better.

Well, you were a checkout check, weren't you, for a long time? Checkout operator. Checkout scucks was my preferred term. Checkout scucks. I believe pack and save operator of the month once in October. No, he never reached those lofty heights. Really? No.

I was in the pack and saved calendar though. What? They do a calendar? Did you take your shirt off? No. And then lay across the belt. The conveyor belt.

Oh, no, no, no. You should never have exposed nipples next to the conveyor belt. Don't imagine you got caught on the end. Oh, yeah. Well, the middie and I

were waiting to pay at the supermarket, and she was like, oh, I just forgot the coleslaw. So she ran off to grab the coleslaw. Wait, at the deli to be scooped into a container? Nah, our pack and save is going through renovations, so all the service deli stuff is just on a shelf. Pre-made. Pre-made, pre-packaged.

So she toddled off to grab that, and I was sitting there watching all our items just get scanned through and scanned through. Oh, now I hate that. And the last item got scanned. And we split the bill now with our trendy new shopping routine. That's cute. Okay.

So I was sitting there like, I can pay my half. I could technically pay her half, but then we've got to do a bank transfer later. I don't want to do that. So do I just dawdle? Do I just hang out here? Plus you haven't added the slaw, so that would be a separate transaction. And she'd have to requeue up.

It's just a nightmare. Who's the slaw for though? Her? No, it's a combination we use at Crowsandos. She had slaw. Group slaw. Okay. Yeah. Oh, skipped over the most important part. When we walked into the supermarket, brand new trolley. Oh!

New trolley day, new trolley day, new trolley day. You were the first person to use it? I think so. I took photos. Oh, yes, please. Nice, yeah. Immediately, please. Wait, did it have, like, the little plastic stuff

that you peel off the handle? No, that was pre-peeled, I think. Okay. Because it also didn't have, like, the residual trimmy bit. Because I'm a magnet for the worst trolley. I'll get a wobbly wheel or a sticky wheel. Every single time I'll go and I'll be looking at them like,

okay, you feel all right, and I'll give it a go, and then halfway through. Yeah. You can tell at the front of the trolley where the bumpers are. Not a scuff. Oh, my God, this is nice. I don't think I've ever had a brand new supermarket trolley. Oh, that's lovely.

That wheel looks fresh. Guys, I tested it. I entered the pack and said, I pushed the trolley and released it. Straight as an arrow. Oh, lovely. Did you do some drifting? Did you do some drifting around the end of the aisle?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I definitely threw the wheel alignment out. How'd she handle? You see, that's why it was straight, your trolley. Nobody's been drifting or running it into it, like the curb outside of the car park. That is beautiful. Look at the wheels on that.

Yeah, man. Nice wheels. The handle is gleaming. When you made the noise, when you grabbed the trolley by the handle and started pushing and realised it was nice, what kind of car noise did you give the trolley? Because normally I'm a grunty V8.

I'm a rotary guy. I go... I do. I can't say I've ever pushed the trolley. Is that a two-stroke? You're rocking a two-stroke? Yeah, I am. But that's a half trolley

though, because it's half power. I never do a full. No, always go half. Okay, yesterday, the trolley though, eh? Because it's half power. I never do a full. No, always go half, yeah. Okay, yesterday, the trolley, Tesla. Oh, yeah, electric engine. Just like smooth. Just that kind of like eerie like. Okay, now let's get back to your etiquette thing here because you're holding up the checkout,

waiting for the midi to come back with a salad, a deli salad. Yeah. Are people starting to... There were two full trolleys queuing up behind us. No, see, you at this stage, you've got to pay for the whole thing and then get a bank transfer.

Wait, wait. But what about the slaw? Because when you put your stuff on, are you totaled and she's still away with the slaw? Yep, everything's been scanned. Also, was she running? I just start adding chocolate bars. Was she running? She definitely wasn't running.

Oh, she should have been running. So I leaned over. I was like, oh, the gliders. Oh, man, I've never seen one of those. Oh, my God. And so with the Tic Tacs, is it still two calories a Tic Tac? Is that right? Well, that's your cigarettes.

Yeah. You guys still do cigarettes? You guys doing rubbish bags and cigarettes back there still? Yeah. Soda streams? How long were you stalling for her to come back? 20 seconds. It was all right.

Yeah, I know, but 20 seconds feels... You've got people waiting. The elderly gentleman behind me wasn't happy, but then he kind of perked up when he saw how hot my girlfriend was. Yeah! You're not going to get away with it, but an old boy sees you, he's going to be like, oh, God, get in there, love. You're not going to get away with it, but an old boy sees you, he's going to be like, oh, God, get in there, love. You're right.

I'm still just imagining your trolley idling while it's waiting. It's empty. It's ready for us next. It does that thing where the car turns off at the lights. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You've got to keep a rotary going every now and then, give it a little bit of...

Yeah. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Yeah. Yeah. I've got a question. I've got two questions. No, I've got one question. Because yesterday I got home and it was a really nice day and I had quite a busy afternoon. Did a podcast, did some things around town.

Got home and the sun was out. And I was like, I'm going to go out. I'm going to enjoy the sun for a little bit. afternoon, did a podcast, did some things around town, got home, and the sun was out, and I was like, I'm going to go out, I'm going to enjoy the sun for a little bit. I'm going to sunbathe, and just really get that melanoma bacon. Yeah, and you had a thirst trap, didn't you? Yeah, do you know what I felt like? I felt like I hadn't been sexy for a while,

so I put a G-Banger on, I did a photo shoot, chucked it up on my Instagram. Just baiting. Just I put a G-Banger on. I did a photo shoot. Chucked it up on my Instagram. Just baiting. Just going for a little fish. Yeah. Mama Corp. I was going to say that is a stampede of tradies heading to your Instagram right now to check it out.

It was in an afternoon. I was feeling a bit like frump and I was like, you know what? I need a bit of male attention. Sometimes you've got to do it. Where was your male for some attention? Aaron works on the weekends on our house, so he's taking Monday, Tuesdays as his off day. So he was actually having a little schnooze.

Oh, okay. He's having a schnooze. I know, and I didn't get any from him, so I... Well, the cat's away, eh? Cat's away. Mama did a little photo shoot and went fishing. And she caught some fish. Anyway, but I was in the kitchen, and I was just wearing like a little like crop top bra thing and my G-bangs.

And what was I doing? I was making a sandwich. I was making a sandwich and I heard a knock on the door. Yeah. It was just like a kind of an interesting knock. And I was like. Oh, no, that's not a knock that you should, if you're coming around to someone's house, you should go. I would go.

I would go. No, no. If a knock that you should, if you're coming around to someone's house, you should go, I would go. I would go. No, no. If you don't know them, if you don't know the person, did they know you? No. Thank you. No. You don't do a comical knock if you don't know the person.

Comical knock? You need to bring more joy into your life. I'm doing a comical knock. If I was a Jehovah's Witness, do you know what I'd do every time? And I'd be like. And I'd be like, who's this fun loving chap? And then they open the door. I'm like a powerful knock. If I was a Jehovah's Witness, do you know what I'd do every time? And I'd be like, oh. And they'd be like, who's this fun-loving chap? And then they open the door, I'm like, gotcha. Got ya.

Gotcha. Do you want in? Yeah. So Jared thinks it should be four sharp knocks. No, that feels so aggressive. Oh, my God. Who's at the door? The Gestapo?

Let me in. I know you are harbouring, sir! Well, it wasn't. It was just knock, knock. See, that's not enough knocks either. I know. Oh, still a little poll tomorrow. How should you knock on someone's door?

Wait, it all depends on whose door you're knocking on, though. Stranger. A friend. Comical knock. No. Well, it went knock, knock, and I went, ugh, and I'm in the kitchen, and the kitchen kind of opens up towards where the door is

and right next to the door, which is stained glass, so you can't see straight through. You can see shapes. Next to that is a big sash window right next to it, and that sash window would be enough to see my bare butt. And so I was like, ah! And then I heard knock, knock again, and I was like, ah! So they must have heard me.

Calvin raises a great point. This could be the knock of someone like a courier that doesn't want you to answer. Well, it was a delivery. So they can write out that card. It was a delivery of sorts, but it wasn't a courier. Was it an Aramex person just throwing your deliveries at your door? So it wasn't a knock, knock.

It was more of a thud, thud. Hit in the door, then hit in the floor. Please do not speak bad of Aramex. I'm waiting for a couple of saucepans today from RMX We need to be on I hope you're looking forward to receiving those at Christmas

Is that all? With no handles on them and a shattered top No So then I kind of ran but as I saw the body move towards the sash window because they would have

just seen me it was literally I'd just pulled up taken my clothes off gone in the kitchen So I sort of ran as I was being like, Aaron, to get him to answer the door, because it was two double knocks.

And I was like, this person wants to be answered, but I can't do it. I don't have any clothes on. So I sort of roused Aaron. So he's sleeping. He's sleeping. It's interesting how a male's sleep is valued by nobody. A male's slumber

oft needed for the recovery, not valued by a goddamn soul. Wake up or your girlfriend is opening the door in a G-Banger in a bra. That's the other alternative. You got no problem with that, do you? Absolutely. Fair enough. Chuck a towel on.

Anyway, I got him and he was sluggish to the door. By that point, the person had left. And it turns out it was my neighbour from across the road. And he has a beautiful garden. And he dropped off a bag of seeds. Because we keep commenting on his garden being like the beautiful flowers. And we want to have a little bit of a wildflower situation.

See, he's a neighbour. He should be doing a novelty knock. I know. And we're mates. And then you would have been like, it's the neighbour. Yeah. Oh, that's why he needs his own knock. I would have just said like, oh, sorry, Brendan.

I've just chucked some clothes on. Brendan, how offended are you by an arse? That's what you could have asked from around the corner. Well, yeah, we do get on quite well. It was not a lot happening. Anyway, so I missed that and I was like, oh, and then I got a bit shirty with Aaron. I was like, why don't you just get up

and get the bloody door I know I know I know I know I shouldn't have but I was flummerging around in the nude anyway

and then I thought the coast was clear and I was like fine I'll go back to making my chicken sandwich went back to the kitchen still in the same outfit Aaron went back

to his slumber and then I saw a car pull up in the driveway and it looked like some kind of like council or tradie or sparky or something. And I was like, on our day of days, like just leave us alone. So I sort of yelled out again,

being like, there's another person here. And I was still in the kitchen. And even before I had time to move or like shuffle back away, this person just like wanders onto my property, past the sash window, looking into the kitchen, looking straight at my nude and noose. And it was like a meter reader.

And I was like, it's so wild to me that meter readers just like wander onto your property. They can just wander, can't they? You should chuck a beware of dog on your gate. They won't come in if there's a dog. But the gate was open, wasn't it? The gate was open. The front gate was open.

You'd shut that if you had a dog. But I was about to pop out the back and remove the bra. Oh, you're saying had you been outside fully nude, the meter reader would have not only seen your power consumption but a couple of bulbs and a couple of gas in it and a heavy drain device back there. I was like, you can't just stroll into people's properties. You can, they can.

It's summer. Women are constantly just enjoying the privacy of their own bosoms in the backyard. Why haven't you got a digital meter? We've got a digital meter and we live in the middle of nowhere. It just tells them how much power you're using. And like by the internet or something.

It just feeds them a number. It was the gas. He went over by the gas. Oh, okay. Gas reading. That should be digital now. That should be. But he's just wandered into my property. I could have been employed by anybody. He might have been a... He might not have even been employed by anybody. He might have been a peeping Tom.

Or casing the joint. Throwing back to getting bloody dressed up and sneaking in somewhere. He could have absolutely just chucked on a high-vis and came around to see some boobies. You reckon he was disappointed? Yeah. What, at the boobies or the lack of? Either, really.

No, the boobies were still under wraps. So he would have been disappointed With the lack of boobs If only he'd waited another two minutes And popped around the back And been like Oh where's the gas Where's the gas

He would have seen it all Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley For Fact of the day Day day day, day, day. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. Good month for KiwiSaver. Sorry. I'm pleased that's having a bounce back.

I'm pleased that's having a bounce back. I was very upset at my KiwiSaver all of last year. Bourne and I, we get a message about our KiwiSaver balance once a month. Are you guys on the same one? Yeah, and then we message each other, and I always get it first because I think it's alphabetical. Look at my up. Yeah, America stocks have been doing really well lately.

So it's gone up. We're not supporting a war, though. Am I supporting a war? Is that why that's gone right up? You actually have a lot of investment in missiles and Russia. I've got good gain here, but I've spent mine on a house, so I've got to wait until I'm 65. Yeah, you do.

So it's not that exciting. No, it's not. Okay. I saw, because that once monthly thing, I saw how to log in and check like day to day. Oh, yeah, don't do that. That's depressing. Yeah.

You just forget about it and it's there day. Oh, yeah. Don't do that. It's depressing. Yeah. You just forget about it. Yeah. And it's there later. Yeah. When you retire. I could really use it now. If you make it to 65, that is. Whoa.

Who gets it if I don't? Shut up. Well, what's in your will? I think my will just says where there's a will, there's a way. Have at. Don't do it. Oh, yeah. Very short.

Very short, but to the point, you know. Decipher that as you will. Well, it's Super Bowl week. Completely forgot it was Valentine's Day this week when I decided it's Super Bowl week. I think you should have done Valentine's Day week. You could pivot. No, I'm not going to pivot.

I'm going to stick to Super Bowl because Super Bowl is very interesting. Super Bowl is very interesting. Today's fact of the day is the Super Bowl is the second highest eating day for Americans. After Thanksgiving? Bingo. Behind Thanksgiving. I've seen stats on this before.

I've got some fresh stats. It's quite gross. Fresh stats. One in seven Americans order takeout on Super Bowl Sunday. Oh, yeah. One in seven. I thought it would have been more. But they're big on the food.

On cooking at home on Super Bowl, yeah. 60% of the takeouts ordered are pizza. Okay. It's the most popular takeout. 1.25 billion chicken wings are eaten. 1.25 billion wings are consumed, which equals 74 million kilograms of chicken wings alone. And in one weekend,

one weekend is responsible for 7% of of chicken wings alone. And in one weekend, one weekend is responsible for 7% of entire chicken wings consumed by that nation. I've had chicken wings in America and I don't know what they pump into their chickens. They're like drumsticks. They're turkeys. I believe those chickens could fly. And you see a rotisserie chicken,

you see a rotisserie whole chicken in the supermarket and you're like, it looks like a turkey. It's not good. That's not good. That's not good. 8.8 million kilograms of chips are purchased for Super Bowl Sunday. 5 million kilograms of potato chips and 3.7 million kilograms of tortilla chips are purchased. Of what chips?

Tortilla. Hello. Tortilla. Tortillas. Tortillas. I've been doing Duolingo, Espanol. Yeah, see. You haven't got up to L yet, have you?

Not yet. No. Avocados. 63 million kilograms of avocados are purchased to make guacamole. Wow. 10% of Americans use their grill. So they're out there on the barbecue. Only 10%.

I thought it might have been more, but the thing about it, I suppose. It's winter though, isn't it? It is winter in a lot of places, and that means you've kind of got to be away from the viewing of the Super Bowl. Yeah. Yeah, so 14 billion hamburgers are made, but hot dogs, steak, bratwurst, and grilled vegetables close behind. Popcorn and nuts.

1.7 million kilograms of popcorn consumed on Super Bowl Sunday and 1.1 million kilograms of nuts. And this is the most mind-blowing part. Okay. During the Super Bowl weekend, football fans drink 1.2 billion litres of beer. Jeez Louise. And it's bad beer too. It's not great beer.

So 50 million cases of beer. Beer sales alone on that day equate for $11 billion. And it's enough liquid to fill an Olympic-sized swimming pool 2,000 times. Oh my God. And people are like, oh, well, how do they justify the spending on Super Bowl commercials? Like paying a celebrity a million dollars. Well, that's how. They're literally buying.

Yeah. It's just this wild weekend of consumption. Wow. It'd be fun to be part of once. You know, like I'd love to do Thanksgiving. I'd love to be in an American house on a Super Bowl. I want to go to an American football game. Not a Super Bowl.

I want to do that tailgating thing they do outside. Everyone's got grills and beers and it's just like hanging out before you go in and watch three hours of effectively a chess game played with man pieces. And a lot of head trauma. A lot of head trauma. A lot of head trauma. So today's fact of the day is that the Super Bowl

is the second highest eating day for Americans, falling only behind Thanksgiving. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. And we talked to Brad about how much money people spend on Valentine's Day. What did he say? New Zealand has spent $10 million?

More. Yeah, compared to? Compared to the week before. Yes. Yeah, that's right. So they spend a lot of money on Valentine's Day. Flowers, jewellery, taxis, food, restaurants, everything. And sometimes it doesn't match. Yes.

That's what we're talking about with Morgan. Like, how do you get on the same page of how hard we're going on a day like this? On a birthday, you're like, it's your day, I go big for you. My day, you go big for me. Yeah. Or whatever. But some people aren't, you know, gift givers. That's not their love language.

Totally. Whereas just spending time with someone might be enough. Yeah. So we want to know, and it doesn't have to be based around Valentine's Day exclusively, but when there was an exchange of gifts and they've totally not matched, they've not been on the same

level. Like, it's, even if you're not into gift giving, like, that's not your love language. If it's Christmas and you're comparing gifts, even if you don't care, you're still mentally like, I've probably spent about this much. And wait, they've spent this much? There is

a little bit of that. There's a little bit of that. If you've gone and named a lovely $20 countdown voucher, because that would be so handy to have in the wallet. And they've got for you a car. I thought the countdown voucher was going to be the expensive one. No in the wallet. And they've got for you a car. I thought the Countdown Bachelor was going to be the expensive one.

No, no, the car. The car. Is kind of out of whack. I definitely have had occasions where Aaron and I have missed, like we've not been a good match with gift giving. The bigger one would be when he gave me, it was when he proposed to me. And our birthdays

are two days apart. So we did an exchange of gifts and I gave him a hundred year old stuffed walrus. Walrus? Made of seal fur. Like a small miniature walrus

that had been made of throw a bucket of red blood over here. the seller didn't tell me it was real silver until after I'd bought it. And she was like, heads up. And I was like, thanks. But I bought this sort of like kooky. Congratulations on your purchase. Oh, by the way.

It's 100 years old. So I'd bought this like kooky stuffed animal. And he bought like a necklace with an emerald in it and then a diamond ring. Oh, yes. So you know what I mean? So it was kind of like, and I was feeling pretty stoked about my stuffed walrus. Okay, so whether it was a Christmas, a birthday

or a Valentine's Day of past, when did the gifts not match up? When were the gifts out of whack? When were the gifts out of whack? Obviously, maybe value-wise, mostly. Yeah, totally. Or sentiment-wise. Sentimentality, like they, you know.

I love saying no gifts and then you get no gifts, and then you get a gift. No, you can't do that. Or then Shana's like, well, what can I get you back? And I was like, no, no, no. All I want is the gloat for a few days of the time I got you something and you didn't give me anything. Or like the latest episode of Coober Enthusiasm where you have a backup gift that you don't tell them about.

And then if they're not happy with the first gift, you're like, I've got you another one. There you go. And then you just take the second one back for a refund if they're happy with the first. 0800-DARLS-AT-EM is our number. Call now. You can text through 9696.

When was the gift giving, the gift exchange, totally out of whack? Valentine's Day today. We want to know with past Valentines, or maybe it could have been a birthday or Christmas. Christmas, any kind of gift-giving occasion. Yeah, when the gift-giving with your partner was out of whack. You weren't on the same page.

One of you spent $30 and one of you spent $300. Yeah, Jess, what happened? So it was our daughter's first Christmas and I handmade a photo album in a beautiful wall hanging of us as a family. daughter's first Christmas and I handmade a photo album and a beautiful wall hanging of us as a family and I got a giant box and I was really excited and I opened it and inside were an ugly pair of jandals. Jandals.

Jandals. And you spent all this time making this beautiful gift that's sentimental that'll be around for years. Yeah. And they weren't even having arms. Yeah, and this morning, it's our daughter's birthday today. Happy birthday. Happy birthday.

I went to get her presents out of the wardrobe, and he was like, oh, we're not doing presents. And I was like, it's okay, because they're not for you. Oh, yeah. What do you think? I gave you a baby for Valentine's Day You're not getting anything Exactly Give me a bloody break

You never know though You say you're not doing presents No, well we did that at Christmas And I got nothing And he got heat, so But did you say you're not doing presents And then got him presents? Yeah, I did

Well that's on you All you can expect in return Is a little bit of gloating for a few days on how you're the better partner. And that's all you can really expect. And that's a gift

that money can't buy. It is. Jess, thank you for your call. Andrea, good morning. What did you get? When was it? Out of whack. Good morning.

Good morning. So for our first Valentine's Day, my husband now got me a gold and diamond ring and I got him a couple of like funny T-shirts. What did the T-shirts say? I only remember one, but it said something like,

nerds do it better. And he was so embarrassed. He didn't wear it at all. Or like, I pooed. The man, the legend. Yes. Or FBI, female body inspector. Oh, my God.

Yeah, what are we, are we at the Phuket markets now? Is this guy's got a list? How long have you been going out when you got him a gold ring? No, he got you a gold ring. You got him a gold ring. That was like our first Valentine, like only like a gold ring? No, he got you a gold ring. You got him a gold ring. That was like our first Valentine, like only like a few months. Oh, wow.

I was really not expecting it. Yeah, see, that's on him. That's way too out of whack for him. You were feeling more funny t-shirt. Someone messaged me saying when they were 18 for Christmas, they got their boyfriend a basketball singlet and he gave them his mother's gold and diamond ring.

That's a big no at 18. That's a big no. That's a family heirloom. Don't be silly. Anonymous, when were the gifts out of whack? So I was 16, and me and my boyfriend, you know, we both wanted really, like, bougie things for Christmas. And I was the state.

He'd been hinting about these limited edition DC sneakers. He wanted, it took me forever, but they were. What year was this, just for a little bit of context on edition DC sneakers. He wanted, it took me forever, but they were. Yeah. What year was this? Just for a little bit of context on the DC sneakers. 2016. Yeah.

A little late. A little late. A little late. It's all right. It feels all right, but go ahead. So you wanted limited edition DCs. Yeah.

So I spent $200 on these shoes and this is UFC. Yeah. And I got home and he was saying, oh, I got the necklace you wanted. I'm pretty sure you're going to love it. And it was probably of the same value at the time.

We showed up, I gave him the sneakers and he hands me a bag from Butterfly Creek. And it was one of those little butterfly necklaces with the initial on it. And he goes, mum, help me get it. You're welcome. Shit, yes, dude. He went to Butterfly Creek.

That is not silver either. Butterfly, butterfly, butterfly, butterfly, creek. Butterfly Creek. I didn't even. What is it? In the gift shop, they've got butterfly necklaces with initials on it. Yeah. And it, like, says the price tag on it.

And it was, like, $10. Yeah. That's turning your neck green the moment you wear it, eh? Oh, no. Anonymous. Thank you for sharing. We'll get to more of your texts and calls next. Keep them coming in.

9696. Mom helped me. She drove me out of the airport, and then we played mini-putt at the pirate place. Valentine's Day today, we're talking about when a Valentine's, or maybe even a birthday or Christmas gift, with your partner was out of whack value-wise. Yeah. When the mark was missed.

Very own George Bertson Studio, because this has happened to you. Mm-hmm. What was the gift exchange? Well, it was Christmas. It was the first Christmas. Both our parents were together, and we were all going to, it was kind of sentimental, right? But we were like, oh that's gonna be chill, I'll just

get a hundred bucks, that's all we're spending. He picked his own fishing rod, didn't even wrap the fishing rod because I was like, how do you wrap a fishing rod? Well with paper. You would have multiple rods. I'd go a long way. Or you could get a tube and then wrap the tube. That's fantastic. Far too much effort for a present he

already picked, right? No, because I went to Oakland on Christmas Day. God loves our kids. You didn't buy it, Georgia, so I just think putting some effort in

would have been appreciated. I'm a Christmas Grinch and even I would have wrapped a fishing rod. Of course you would have. Georgia Bird's a terrible person. I am. Everybody's always

so bad. It's all coming out. I'm so glad it's coming out. You got a $100 fishing rod unwrapped that he chose for himself. Yeah, I paid for it, just so we can clarify that. No, but you're going to be married soon. It's his money too. True.

Back then, probably not. Yeah, right. But anyway, so I saw this box under the tree and I was like, oh, we'll open that last. I think it's a Yui Boom. And I was like, this is going to be so easy. I love a Yui Boom. We're shaking it.

And he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, open it last. I was like, cool, cool, cool're shaking it and he's like yeah yeah yeah open it last I was like cool cool cool yui boom can't wait open it and there's like a lei on top underneath a lei like a wooden woodworking tool no like a lei oh okay underneath it is a full

set out itinerary of a trip to Hawaii and you got him a fishing rod? An unwrapped fishing rod. The best part is he had pre-got leave from Ross Boss, so he had done this whole thing, put all this effort in. What a guy. And I was like, yeah, well, there's your fishing rod.

He just couldn't even be bothered wrapping his fishing rod. Just couldn't even be bothered trying to think about how to wrap a fishing rod, let alone wrap it. No, I would have had to spend more money to get a tube to put that in, you know? More money? He got you a fully paid trip to Hawaii, including annual leave. I know.

Now, you're lucky it's two minutes past nine because I would like to delve into what a white girl from Christchurch is doing wearing a Bob Marley T-shirt, but we are out of time. Yeah, it's hard. We are out of time. It's like swallowing a pill sideways, Georgia.

I'm going to need a solid drink of water to get that down. What do you mean? Jar bless. Hey, Jar up. Jar Rastafari. Jarman. Join Georgia Ness for the reggae hour. Oh, another one in the bag.

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