ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 15th April 2026

Episode Date: April 14, 2026

On today's Big Pod, FVH give financial advice Top 6 - Ways to tell the Cyclone is woke Why men are losing friends SLP - Is 'mushroom dirt' dirt? Max amount we should be working to be happy Every group has a finger princess Vaughan's $10 Suburb Who is the most famous person in your contacts? Help us with our marketing campaign Lads train trip Fact of the day How did your parents trick you? QLP - Would you be offended if a cafe served you the crust? What brings you joy at work? We should all embrace small talk See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

from the ZDM podcast network. This is... Fleshwon and Haley's Big Pod. Thanks to animates. Making happy happen for pets. Zedem's Fleshwon and Haley. Thank you, Brin's back. He's been sick a couple of days.

Lost his voice at drama school, didn't he? Two minutes past six. Haley broadcasting from our Melbourne studios on the 21st floor. Yeah, good-a. I've actually lit a candle today for a bit of at-mose. Did you, wait, did you buy your own candle? Okay, do you know what I've actually done is because this, I will say this apartment's grim, like it is grim, grim, grim.

So I went to Kema and I just got a couple of little things including, can you see in the background there? I got a little vase and some fake flowers. I got a candle, just something to make it a little more. Great for the Melbourne landfill in a week time. Yeah, they love it. Wait, you're just going to draw off the balcony at the end. I'll just leave it in the Airbnb for the next person?

Well, I did buy some bedding and stuff, and I'll donate that. What? Yeah, the rest of it. No, no, I cannot, I cannot quite explain to you how grim this acom is. Why didn't you just spend more on accommodation? I didn't book it, my producers did. Oh, okay, right. And they're lia for lesson.

Yeah, yeah. They'll be getting a strongly word of day, no one. Yeah, they will be out. I wondered yesterday when I could see the heat pump on the wall over your right shoulder. It was once white. Yeah, it's got that, yes. She's yellowing white. She has yellowed.

I tell you what, she's loud, so we don't put her on. She needs to pop to turkey. Give a little rejuvenatial. She's yellowed. Not looking great. She's not aging well. But happy to be broadcasting live from Australia. I'll know if anything happens over here.

Chances on the show to win cash this morning. $10 suburb, $1,000 street is back, thanks to one roof. We've got the top six on the way. Yeah, the top six signs that tropical cyclones are woke. Yes, because... Who's saying they're white? Well, the Hawks Bay Mayor refused to issue the warning for the cyclone that just kind of blew past. Vianu.

Yeah. And said it was all bit woke. Bit woke. God, I tell you, I've been frustrated at people that were like, oh, God, they gave us lots of warning and nothing happened. The same people would have been like, where was that warning? Yeah. They hadn't been a warning. Just.

You can't win, can you? You cannot win. Well, the top six coming up. James got your only chance to win your way to a living deal. in Los Angeles. So a sold-out show in L.A. Olivia Dean, flights, accommodation, spending money and tickets

for you and a friend. Our song of the day is what you've got to be listening out for. Today's song, A Couple of Minutes. Play Olivia Dean, a couple of minutes. And I'm just saying that. I'm just saying it could be coming up before seven.

It could be coming up in a couple of minutes. It could be coming up in a couple of minutes. Listen out for that Olivia Dean song. Lotto New Zealand's at $14 million. Are we going in on this? Sure. We're back in on it. But I've got it.

financial advice from someone who deals with big lottery winners next. The Fletchborn and Haley, big pod. 14 million is what the New Zealand lot is at at the moment. Yep. For Wednesday. That'll do. It's Wednesday. Now we've got a problem because Haley's in our syndicate

and we all go in and buy a ticket. Aye. And if we win, we split the money. But Haley's in Australia so she can't buy her ticket. So she's outborn. It's just new and me going. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I will transfer the money to my mother. I will have her go and buy a physical ticket and take a photo of it and send it to us. Okay, we've got to have proof. That's the other thing you put proof in the group chat. And Patsy is not in the syndicate. She will get no money out of this. She'll go to Italy and reno something. Oh, she can blow the money.

She can rot in a ton of the internet. Here's an interesting situation that's just popped into my head. Yeah. My friend Callum, you guys know him. Yep. He talked to him about our swipe cards, not working? No, I haven't because the app. It's terrible.

The worst swipe app in the world of his jurisdiction. The worst swipe app in the world of swipe. Sometimes you've got to have it open. Sometimes you don't need it open. It's out of his jurisdiction. He just designs plastic stuff. Yeah, but surely you can email someone in the company. Give me an email.

I'll email. Tell them to make it a pass when you, like your credit card when you double tap. And it goes it's what it was. Vaughn won't ask his friend. I'm not dragging. My friendship into your swipe card issues. We could improve the system of swipness. Also, my swag card, even on the old iPhone 12.

works really well Well you wait No, sometimes I see you lurking outside the door Oh that's not because I forgot my phone In some of the internet Right, but anyway So what's Callum got to do with us? He had an unscratched five dollar scratchy

Yeah And he sold it to his workmate for five dollars No! Oh no, you don't do that No, you never do How much did his workmate win? So when was Schroding his cat Before the workmate scratched it

We had a good chat about it in the lads group Like what would you do it? Like what's the money or the bag situation? No, no. This is one of those stories. You sell it to your friend and you lose and they win. So the guy at his work won. How much?

$8. Oh, God. Oh, boy. This was an oversell. No, I know. This was an oversell. He sold it to him and I'm like, when's this guy scratching it? And he's like, oh, I don't know.

He might scratch it tomorrow at smoke. I'm like, you got a little, I could, my mind was racing for 24 hours. So he did win. He won $1,000. That happened. and another one of our mates Secret Santa's, it was a $2 limit, and one useless dude hadn't purchased anything

so this person was going to miss out of Secret Santa all the way to the Christmas party. Stop and got a $2 scratchy. They won $1,500, and he demanded half of it. No, absolutely. No, no. That's how a gift works. That's what we, that's what I said.

I was like, you want, no, you spend $2 to be secret. If you don't want the person, don't give lotto tickets and things as presents to people, you don't want to see one. Exactly. Yeah, totally agree. Yeah. And this guy apparently like years later was still just like,

she never gave me my 750 bucks. I would have given you $2 and said, there you go. Yeah. Now you owe me a secret Santa prison. Yeah. Anyway, the reason I say this is a lotto's 14 mill, but a guy has said a super yacht broker whose last name is seal, and I find that funny

because the seals live in the ocean and that's where boats live. Yeah. A super... Bar da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. David is his name. He said one piece of advice for Kiwis who win a lottery, do not buy a super yacht.

Obviously not. He's a super yacht broker. And he's like, don't win one big amount of money and buy a super yacht. People do go crazy though. They do. But even if you did win one of the big power balls and it got to 50 mill.

I wouldn't even buy a boat. No. I don't know how to work a boat. I wouldn't even know how to walk onto a boat. One day, and there's a very slim chance, I thought, gosh, I'd like to be on a boat. I would take some of that money I'd won and I would pay someone who knew what they're doing

to take me on said boat. Exactly. Exactly. I would charter a boat. I would charter a boat. He said there's an expression in the industry of super yachts. It's not the price of the elephant, it's the cost of the hay. I hate that saying. It's a dumb saying.

It's a dumb saying. But what he's saying is it's so expensive. Because you remember we went out on a friend's boat and his dad said how much it cost to filler? I was like, what? And that was, it cost $1,200 in diesel. and that was 12 years ago.

Yeah, that was 12 years ago. And it was like, we used half of that on a skirting around, mucking around, mish. Like, and I felt so bad. I was like, what? You're spending $600 for us just to be out here going, oh, we're on a boat.

We did throw a dry ice bomb off the pack. Yeah, that was funny. I think he was like, that's probably worth $600. Yeah. And Vaughn went swimming and didn't like it. I went swimming out and really overestimated. my sewing ability. I got to the shore and I was just like

because I'm never getting back. I hated that. I live here now. I'm Tom Hanks. It is funny though that how like owning your own boat is like a marker of wealth. So when you win a lot of people do buy these boats. You need to learn, you need to be boaty.

So I see boats. I see old boats and I'm like, that is cool. Yeah. See a boat. That's what I do. I see old coldy boats or own beautiful old boats that were built in New Zealand and one of them. Like what's the one you love in Queenstown?

Oh, the Ernstlaw? You love an urns. We love the urns law. Although that had cost a bit of hay to keep that thing going, but a coal. So this is based on like an AI overview on 2020 data. The asking price for a super yacht in New Zealand was about 13.6 mil. So high end, obviously like 250. What we went on was a launch, not a super yacht.

Yeah, I know. A super yacht's three steps more. But then again, like charter costs $3,000 an hour. Do that if you've won $20 million in Lotto. Yeah, totally. You know? I might charter a bud. As long as the days.

We can get a kayak. Well, no, a lot of people do it for like 21st and birthday parties. And, you know, they're not that expensive if everyone chips in if it's a... I just need the conditions to be right. Adderly flat. Yes. Massive boat. And a bar.

And a gut full of ginger to stop me getting seasick. And a bar. And a bar. And a bar. That's one thing. I don't like drinking on boats. Oh, really? No, I don't like drinking on whites.

He was a haley. He was really honing those gorgeous. G&T's. I'd say it was like the one time you were drunken than me. Come on darling. That's not a boat, darling. The Fletchbourne and Haley Big Pod. From the Fletchhorn

and Haley group chat, this is the top six. Hi there, well Soclone Vianu blew through dropped a lot of rain. In fact, I've actually, at my place, had more rain post-cyclone that I had during. Yeah, because I think it kind of

veered to the right and it kind of missed Auckland and we didn't get the wind and the rain. Auckland was very lucky but Auckland had received that Oh my god so my plane on Saturday landed and the entire and I turned my you know how someone next to me turn their phone on early Oh you always hear it out of yeah some of tea

And then once the plane hit the runway Or for literally from there to the gate It was just everyone was getting it Once everyone turned their phones on It was crazy. Warning and wind and rain and you know Best to be prepared for these sorts of And also it was COVID triggering as well. Yes, it was a little bit.

Because we got a lot of those in COVID, those iPhone or phone alerts. This was a COVID-19 announcement. Well, no, it's like we got the, you're about to go into level two or lockdown. That's what it was. That's what it was. Tonight at 1159. Yeah. Auckland, you're going back in the little four.

Stop, stop, stop, stop. I know, it was horrible. It was jarring. They should change the sound of it. Bing, ling ding, ding, ding. Oh my gosh, I won something. It's like batting down the hatches. Oh yeah like what's the lotto win?

Did da, did it did dee? Yeah, something like that and you're like, oh great, there's a cyclone coming. You feel a little bit better about it. A little bit better about it. Well, Wido O'Meer, Craig Little said I didn't declare a state of emergency, you know, in the incoming remains of a cyclone because it was all a bit woke. Now, I want to remind you, this is one of the most harshly hit areas of New Zealand in the last few years. Yeah, better to be prepared.

a series of cyclones kind of really messed up that poor area of New Zealand. Northland Bay of Plenty and then around like East Cape down to a hawks bay is really slammed. He could have just said we looked at the data and we thought it wasn't necessary. Yeah. No, but he used the words. It was all a bit woke. It's all a moat.

It's like old mate language. Yeah, might as well have called the hurricane a snowflake. You might have all called the cyclone a snowflake. By the way, a poofter. When I said, there's a bit of a puff to cyclone. Yeah, we're going to declare a state of emergency, but the wind was just a, poof, poof, poof. Yeah.

Bit of a bloody poofter it was. Well, look at the top six signs. Your psych blind's woke. Okay. Number six on the list, it tells you its pronouns before it blows your roof off. My pronouns are... My pronouns are wind rain. This is why you said you don't want to be cancelled because it's satire.

Yeah, yeah, it's satire. Okay. I'm actually on your side. Yeah. Keep reiterating that, I reckon. And I'll just say, I'm on your side, and people will be like, he's on our side. Everyone will be saying that, everyone thinks I'm on their side.

Wow. Say things like, not all men. We love that. Yeah, thank you. Them side. That, yeah. Okay. Why do you make the bad guy?

Number five on the list of the top six sides, your cyclones woke. It's only blowing down white people's trees. Oh, yeah. Okay. It's just like, I don't, I feel like the, you know, I just feel like the colonises came in and they planted all these trees, and I'm just going to blow down the bad trees. They're not even native.

They're not even native. They're not in native. That pine trees, okay? It's a winery. It's a willow. Captain Cook came here, and he planted pine trees. Number four on the list of the top six signs of your cyclones woke. Cyclone refuses to come over the Christmas period if it's redneck uncle hurricane from America who voted for Trump's in town.

Yeah. That's fair enough. Fair, though. Yeah, fair. It's really awkward when they cross paths. Yeah. Superstorm. Yeah.

Batting down the hatches. Number three on the list of the top six signs of your cyclones woke. It just takes the wind down a little bit when it sees a pride flag just to make it look really. good. Yeah, okay. Can't have it flapping too hard. The other flags are just like, blah, blah, blah, blah. The pride flags are like, oh, yeah, that's not, just perfectly. It is nice when you see a flag that's perfectly

waving in the wind. It is, it's beautiful. Yeah, like, yeah, it's perfect. Number two on the list of the top six times, your cyclones woke. If your boat doesn't have unigender bathrooms, it's going to blow it onto the rocks. Okay. That's fair. It's going to blow it straight onto the rocks. Yeah. And number one on the, the, I was this,

Obviously, satire, don't cancel more. I'm on your side. Yeah. Oh, you said it again. I'm on them side. Not all men. Not all men. Okay, can't.

Next one. Let's just get this over with. Top six signs of your cyclones woke. The cyclone used to love Harry Potter. It was a Hufflepuff. But now it's had its deathly hat to us, Hello's tattoo covered over because. Yeah.

Because, oh, yeah. Jigar rolling. We had to do a tattoo on. A bit of a tiff. Taff. That's the day. 6. The ZDM Podcast Network.

All right. Both you boys are in your 40s, so listen up. Why are you losing your friends so quickly? Why are you becoming lonely? Is it just men that you're talking about? It's men in particular. 15% of men now say in their 40s, they have no close friends.

That's... No. Not me. Right, no. Men with 6 plus close friends in their 40s have halved since the 90s. Do you think it's because... Even me, I'd have 6 plus close...

Is this other men or can this be anybody? I think it would be true for men and women, surely, like as you get older and people have families. To me, it's quality of a quantity. Yeah, totally. I totally agree, but this is men in particular this article is about, why men in their 40s are becoming more and more isolated. Here's a list.

Let's see if they apply to you. Because I reckon some of them do. Okay. Okay. Mistake number one, you've removed yourself from social media because you don't like it that much. Now, like it or not. But I know some dudes that have. Yes, right?

Like it or not, social media is like a kind of a necessary evil in a way. In the moment you disappear, people forget your birthday, people forget what you're up to and you're kind of out of sight, out of mind. And you're because you're not popping up on their story, they don't think about you as much or they don't remember things. Yeah, and so they don't think, oh, I better text them. I better text them, you know? You just sort of disappear. Because I could quite easily, if I didn't have this job, just not be on social media. No, I love Instagram.

You do, you do, you couldn't do it You love the attention You love the attention Oh my god Every time I see a cute photo I'm like can't wait to get that up But then I do notice I do notice people that take breaks

From social media They'll disappear Yeah Sometimes an ounce Sometimes not And then they always come back Yeah yeah yeah Because a little detox of sorts

Yeah yeah Yeah yeah Okay mistake number two I think we could all be guilty Of this regardless of gender Time and energy So you go like I'd rather just go home

And sit on the couch and put my feet up, then make the effort to go, like, go out and catch up with my mates and, you know, make some plans and that kind of stuff. Midlife energy is precious. Which I get, because you just need your rest and, you know, your recovery. But then also, the social battery recharging is a big thing. It's good for you, isn't it? To go out with your friends.

That's how I recharge all of my batteries, essentially. But yes, it is good for you. Mistake number three, letting your partner organize your social life. I reckon that would be a huge thing for husbands in their 40s, right? So they're like wives or whatever come in and they start making all of the plans. We're going to this wedding this weekend. I even reckon like lunch with this people.

People in their 20s and 30s, that would happen as well. The dominating person organises that you end up socialising with their friends more that you might not gel with. More than your friends. Yeah. And you don't actually get a say in what you're doing. Yeah. But also if your friends are a bit, nah, then obviously you want to hang out with your friends,

don't you? Yeah, no, you might have dad friends. They're your friends for a reason. But they're your friends for a reason, exactly. And maybe you want to do things that your partner doesn't want to do. Yeah. But this is huge for men in their 40s. They let their partners kind of organize so much of their life.

By the way, we don't want to do it. It's really exhausting. But, like, you know, we're going, come here, come here, come here, come here. And you just kind of lose control of your own social life. Right. Okay, mistake number four of five, by the way. Work takes over and work becomes the only friends that you need. So you become so consumed with work that your social life,

even becomes work, all of your time spent at work, you talk about work, you think about work, you got to sleep. So getting your social life outside of work. It's important. Yeah, whereas like we became friends via work, but we spend a lot of time outside of work together. Socialising as genuine friends. Which is nice.

Because I have some people who work with people that they would rather die than spend time with them outside of work. I know, yeah. Guys, like look at the time right now. Imagine if we didn't. like each other. Yeah.

How hard this would be. Yeah. And also I love that like I met you guys through work but then I've made friends through you, you know, like the gaggle and all that. Like I didn't know before that. Yeah. Okay, here's the fifth mistake. It's kind of like, what would you call this?

Like nonchalance or like being a bit lazy, I'll see them when I see them. Scheduling difficulties. It's a bit like hard basket. Yeah, 100%. We must catch up. That's what we're just so russed. I hate it. I don't say it.

I know I hate it when people say, oh, we must catch up. It's like, yeah, why are we even, we don't, well, it's just something you say, isn't it? You don't mean it.

Don't say it then. Hey, good to see you. See you soon, I guess. Yeah, don't say, oh, we must catch up. Yeah, totally. Before it's too late as well. Basically, the fix, so this was five issues,

the fix given by the psychologist was like do the mahi, basically. Like, realize, Like, have a look around and be like, do I have any friends? And if the answer is no, you've got to go, why don't I have any friends? And what can I do to fix it? You've got to maintain your friends like a pot plant or a garden, don't you? Don't overwater it?

Yep. Don't overwater it. Just enough. But don't abandon it completely. Well, do what I've done. And just, Vaughn's looking after my plants at the moment, so I'm outsourcing. And they are thriving. Yeah.

Vaughn's been rubbing it in my face. How good my plants are doing without me. I have to, you know, claim some back after what I did to your dear Nana's, dearly to put a his rhubarb, which by the way has two new leaves. So maybe the cow smashing it kind of gave it a little bit zest for life. But Fletcher's indoor plants are thriving. I've been sending new leaf reports. I've restaked them.

It's like his cat. He didn't train his plants or his cat. Oh my God, they were such naughty plants. They were naughty sprawling plants. I got them up. I got them looking hot. Are they up now? Dude, yeah, they're up.

I stake them. This is amazing. This is amazing. They're not going to want to go home to your crappy little house, are they? they're going to be like, oh, we want to stay with our new dad. And this weird, because I've got them in the outside room, so it's like dark, they don't get to Rick's sunlight, and it's almost like a little bit of a sexy plant dungeon.

They're like, yeah, daddy, I've got them all tied up and stuff. I think they might want to, yeah, you do. I think they're going to want to come home. The Z&M Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh Forne and Haley. Fletch Fawn and Haley, silly little poor is so silly, silly, silly, that the silly. Starts a little pole. Starts a little pole.

Abloishing, we love mushrooms. I love it. Oh, God, yeah. All the time. I love mushrooms. I had a lot last night, white button. Put a bell in. With like a little cream.

You know those floppy Asian mushrooms? Yeah, shatake. Yeah, those are nice. Oyster, yeah. Or what I say is, you who knew, Konami? You know, there's all thin little, little one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I had a, but that are more of a flavory sache, eh?

Yeah. Because that's what I love about a button. It's just great It's a great fill Recently had it was either a dumpling Or one of those What are those They looked like puckered

Buckhulls Shumai Shumai I think it was a mushroom Shumai or a mushroom dumpling Amazing Haley have you tried that When you're back

Let's put this in the calendar When you go and try that Insanely huge new buffet out our ways What do you mean there's a buffet With mushrooms 90 times the size of my home It's the same size as my to 10 which is over the road from it.

Oh wait, I'm sorry, what? Yes. Do they have done? Is it Asian? It's Asian buffet? Oh my God. Yeah, it's an Asian buffet the size of Mita 10. But wait, I feel like after a couple of dishes, he's going to start repeating dishes.

I believe it's a buffet. Okay. So there's a. So most of it's dining. Yeah, it'll be like Mata 10 as well. You're walking and you're like, can you tell me we're about support Shumayers? No, like, Isle 12, Bay 2. Yeah.

Right. You can pull it in a towel. You can pull the trade entrance. Yeah, yeah. If you're a real eater, you're pulling the train entrance. Well, do they wash their mushrooms at this buffet? Well, I don't know. Let's get back to silly little pole, which does mushroom dirt count as dirt.

Because I've been leaning in hard to mushrooms lately. And I've learnt you don't wash them. Why? Because the minute you run them underwater, they just go absorb. And they absorb all the water they can as cook as they can. And then you've got to cook the water off before they'll start cooking. Trust me, I've tried it too. Because they do get watery already.

Do they're so watery. So what you do is you've got to cook them. And then the water. we run off. Then you start getting that really golden brown mushroom. I had some mushroom sauce for a steak the other night that would have blown your tits. Your goat tits would have been blown right off. Don't blow the goat tits off. Those things are precious. Your big, huge goat tits would have been blowing right off.

I feel like I live in a bit of, and I'll be interested to see the results. I feel like I live in a bit of a secret shame when I see a bit of a dot of dirt. And I'm like, I don't care. I don't care either. It's like how we say, if I find a hair in my photos, pull it out and keep eating. Yeah, I don't care. The dirt's going to get cooked off or whatever. and it's going to die because it's a hot pan.

You're eating fungus anyway, right? You're eating it's probably growing in it. It's literally dirt itself. Yeah. So does mushroom dirt count as dirt? The options were yes, ooh, wash it off. Yes, it's dirt, but I ate it anyway. Or 15% of people said, no, it's not even dirt.

So 15% of people said, no, it's not dirt. 40% said, yes, it's dirt, but I ate it anyway. And 46% said, ooh, yes, I'll wash it off. Now, I like to add together the two bottom ones there for 55% of people will eat that. We'll eat the dirt. I have vivid memories of, and I don't know if my mum still does it, she would peel the mushrooms.

Madness. Yes, my friend does it. On a paper towel, like rolls them like this. Yeah. No, just give them a quick, like wipe if you're that worried about it.

Yeah. But don't rinse. Stop rinse and it will change your life. What's the key? Just use it like a paper towel to... You can do damp cloth? Yeah. Don't do anything.

Get those things in the pan. No, sometimes you need to do something because we go from... Rocks of dirt, eh? Well, all right, some feedback on it. Jazz said mushrooms are chewy dirt. 10 out of 10, do not recommend. She hates the mushrooms.

This wasn't for you, Jazz. Can I take in our poll, please? Aisha said, most of the time I give it a quick rinse or flick it off. I won't eat it. Flick it off, sure. Again, Aisha, trust me, stop washing them or rinsing them. It's going to change your mushroom. It's not real dirt.

Turn your line, change your mushroom. Change your mushroom, change your life. Yeah. There's no mushroom for error when it comes from carrying your mushroom. room. Taylor said, Vaughn picked this a little poll, didn't he?

Oh, yeah, I did. He did. He did. He's given calendar week. He picks the silliest of the silly poll. No, I was all for this poll. I wasn't for calendar week. Jane says, there's a middle ground here.

Brush. Wait, wait, wait. Remember Chess Week? Yeah, dude. The people remember Chess Week, too. Because I think we're like reflecting too much back on calendar week, but we've let Chess Week go. I've heard from one of my besties.

Have you? One of your imaginary mates? Beards. Best mushroom recipe Stop messaging my mum We need to talk about this by the way I think I'm talking to your mum more than you are Well sometimes yes

Best mushroom recipe is fry a portobello mushroom and blue cheese Oh yeah Stop it Is she peeling them though? Is she peeling them Are you still peeling? I think she's stopped peeling Are you still peeling Ask Beaver she removes the dirt

I don't think Bev does much too sure Actually she stopped peeling and then she stopped doing the dirt Probably washing though Probably washing though No please stop washing everybody There's a middle ground here brush off, never wash off, physical flex of dirt, then the rest is just good protein,

says Jane. Yeah, props, dirty props. And minerals, vitamins and minerals from the earth. From the earth itself. Yes. Hannah said, Where doesn't kill you makes you stronger? Beautiful. A moment.

She's not dead. She's not dead. She's not dead. She's not dead. Where is the who mushrooms button, says Hannah. Oh, yeah, some people don't like them. We don't get out of my pole. vegetarians don't eat mushrooms. Yeah. What do you eat?

I know. Just the dirt. Just straight dirt. They just look and dirt. Never wash them but sometimes still peel if they're old and mankie says Bev. Oh no. Even if they're old and manky, get them in. When a mushroom gets a bit soggy, like wet in the bag, you're like, you'll be right.

Gets a bit wrinkly? Like it's just like, remember my way out, boy. I'm going to heat me up. I'm going to hydrate you in a stir fry. Yeah. I'm a bum. I'll put you in a pizza. I've worked at a mushroom farm, says Carolyn.

and that dirt ain't my friend. They grow in manure. No, we know that. It doesn't count, so it's not dirt. Technically, it's not doing it. We know we're eating shit. I'm eating shit everywhere. Why not this avenue of my life?

Natalie said, because I know I've got time for worrying about a little bit of dirt. Plus, that's how you get iron guts. Yeah, exactly. Alicia says, we all need a little extra immunity from that dirt. I do wash them, but sometimes there's some dirt hiding. Again, Alicia, Stop washing the dirt.

I've put way worse things in my mouth. Chloe. Yes, Chloe. Wait, have we done text of the week this week? It's a little poll. It's a silly little poll when it's not feedback. Sorry, it's not the jurisdiction. Oh, you get nothing.

You're getting nothing. Tip of the hat to you, Chloe. Yeah. Top five things that you put on your mouth that have been worse. Please respond. Cill little poll, does mushroom dirt count as dirt? I'm going to combine, yes, it's dirt. And no, it's not.

Yes, it's dirt, but I didn't. Anyway, no it's not dirt, of course. Eat it at 55% of people dealing with that dirt. The ZN Podcast Network. There has been a study into work hours and happiness. The work-life balance. Okay. Oh, God.

When are we going to hit that four-dayer? I've got a few friends, actually, that have been in a four-day. If we started working a four-day week, you'd just do more work outside of work. Me? Yeah. I think you've really got to face up to the facts. You're probably a workaholic. I've slept.

Have you? Your eyes look like... Can you do... Pistoles in the snow? Pistoles in the snow. We can see you on Zoom broadcasting from our Melbourne studio and last night you did a comedy gig at midnight.

I did it... So I was on stage 2 a.m. on New Zealand time. But I'm here and I've turned up. You always turn up. But that's the thing. You're always like, I'll get that four day work. You're just better. Guys, guess what?

I'm doing 18 comedy shows in three days. Yeah. Okay. No, that's fair. what I'm doing in between. I'm getting on the piss and I'm smoking durries and I'm eating in and partying

and social language. It's like, you've got to relax. In general, I think as a society, we are ready for the four-day work. Well, I don't think we'll have a choice soon, Haley, because AI is going to really disrupt everything. And we may be forced to not work.

See that movie, Wally, where... Robots and stuff start doing everything and humans just live on a spaceship that's like a cruise ship the whole time. We just get, like, really fat, and stuff and everyone's like, oh, that's so bad. I'm like, is it? Because we're all fat.

As long as everybody's fat. As long as everybody's fat. You know, but we won't be fat because we've got the fat jabs now. Perfect. So we'll be skinny on a cruise ship. Do you know how many people I've heard bring up the Wally movie in recent interviews regarding the future of AI? It's insane.

It's, yeah. It is scary. Here's what the day should look like. This is from the University of British Columbia and the University of Basel, which, to my obvious, I love it. It's one of my favorite leafy herbs. Yeah, actually. And a Tom Yum.

Yeah. And a Tom Yum. Basil. Oh, I just love Basil full stop. On a pizza. Gets a bit of punch through. Oh, Basil Pesto. Stop it.

In a salad. Okay. So work should be less than six hours a day. Beyond six hours of work, your chances of having a good day drop significantly. Yeah, but what hours in nine to five with a lunch break? Eight. Eight. Well, no workplaces.

This is just ridiculous. No workplace is just going to let you go home at three. If you get your work done, why not? Or two. If you get your work done, why not? This is what I think. If you get your Mahi done, why not? If we can all agree that six hours is the max,

why not we can get this done? I'm not working six hours. That's madness. Four tops, thank you. That would be an increase for us and I refuse. But in general. I doth protest fairly loudly when they said the show's going to go to all 10. I was like, you're taking the pissing?

Here we are, mate. Socialized for up to two hours. Friends or family, but only when socializing has. an actual purpose, not a side activity, more than two hours of socialising a day and the benefit starts to disappear. Okay, but see, I feel like if people were doing just six hours work and had this extra time, they'd just use

it to scroll Instagram, Reels and TikTok. Correct, that's as well. And go home and watch Netflix and not exercise or see friends. And not socialise. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Here's the part that blows my mind. Exercise up to four hours is positively linked to a better day. A day. A day.

Oh, oh, God, mate. You get 30 minutes from me and that's it. I'm like to do an hour and a half. Like, I'll do a cycle class and a workout for an hour and a bit, maybe. That's it. That's it. But then walking? Four hours before it impedes your day has been like too much of your day or...

Right, too much. I guess walking to work or walking around work, that can count as well. Walking around town, yeah, walking to the candy store. No amount of... Walk into the park. I'll take you to the candy. This shop. Us is a shop.

It was a shop. Not a store. You think 50 cents said I'll take you to the candy store? I'll take you to the confectionery aisle. Yeah, that's more likely. Actually getting a couple of lollies and lying on the couch. No amount of couch time is linked to a good day. Oh, come on, you've got to relax at the end of a day.

And housework, nothing. No one ever, I did. So I've been, this week, I've been like, every day I'm going to do something. School holidays, the kids are home. I'm like, every day I'm going to do something around the house. I'm like, tick, tick, tick, tick. What do you mean? It's school holidays the kids are home.

Make them do it all. they've really taken on their father's mantra of if you don't want to do something be bad at it because I'm just like, let me do it bring back hideings I cleaned the bathrooms yesterday give them a smack I reckon

give them a smack and see if it sorts it out I was like what I'm going to do I'm going to get home we rode the train great day we'll discuss that later get home I was like I'm going to spend a couple hours

cleaning the bathroom then I'm going to relax and play me some Pokemon have a bit of dad time I was cleaning the bathrooms right up until I start cooking dinner Bloody hell. You always think, I'll give it a little sprit,

30 minutes and then three hours later. But I'm, my own worst enemy, I had a drill with a brush attachment and I'm just like, these tiles have never been cleaner, baby! I'm keeping Jiff in business, I'm spraying chiff around. Weigh, wow, wow, wow. Those bathrooms are so clean though. Do you want to see a video? No, I don't care.

Just see a video of how clean the bathroom is. No, I don't care. Just give it a spray and wipe or an exit mold. Exit mold is okay, and then just wash it and walk away. No. Just X-M-old. Everything. Play, Z-N's, flesh, one and haley.

The Finger Princess. Not what you think. Not immediately what you think. Every, so you were saying every friendship group has one. Every friendship group has a fingerprint Yes. Okay.

I'm trying to think, I'm thinking to the gaggle, right? Let's say our bigger, our wider friend group. Yes. Who's our fingerprinted? I still don't know what a Finger Princess is. Do we have a fingerprint, Finger Princess? here?

Between the three of us? I don't think so. Okay. Well, now I definitely don't know what it is. Otherwise known as an ask hole. An ask hole? An ask hole. The finger princess is known as the person who doesn't lift a finger

and it is defined by someone who asks others for information they could easily find themselves. Almost a version of our beloved weaponized incompetence. Right. So, okay. So people who go like, yes. Like what time does the restaurant close?

Where is the restaurant instead of just Googling it? Oh, yeah, they're using their chat as sort of... A bit of incompetence. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think we have one of those in the gaggle. Like everyone is just... It's a consistent pattern, not just occasional, oh, what are we doing or anything like that.

It's like a constant asking questions that you could easily figure out yourself. Oh, I wouldn't like that. No. I can't think of anyone that's like that. Can you? A fingerprint says. Right.

No, I'm trying to think of anyone in our group that's like, oh, what's happening? Because everyone's competent, aren't they? They're just, you know. We've got very competent friends. And a lot of us organizes and they give everyone the info. So no one needs to ask. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I know people like this, that it's like, I don't know, Google it.

Do you know where you find the fingerprint says it? Google it. Do you know where you find the fingerprint says in a lot of groups? Someone will do a group post and be like, what's this or this? And it's like, you could literally just Google it. that. Yeah, you could literally Google it or like read the information just above that I've posted there, mate? Yeah. It's literally right there. Oh, can you just tell me? Yeah. I mean, it might be different if you're asking for opinions and something. What you just said there, can you just tell me?

Did sound like something I'd say in the sort of wider group work chat. Oh, listen, I don't think we have a fingerprint says in the trio, but if we did, it would be born. It's born. Just out of sheer uselessness. Our show chat. Ask Carwin. Producer carway. Producer car away. I'm totally willing to admit that. Producer carwin. Out of any of us,

who's the finger princess? I've been like, isn't this Vaughn? Yeah, no, no, it's getting. Yeah, this is me. This is me. Also, what time are we doing on the train? Yeah, yeah.

What day is that then? It's in the email. Actually, you know what? Vaughn does ask a lot of questions that are either already in the email or the calendar. Yeah, but I told you, I refuse to put my work calendar on my phone because I need distance.

But also, like, in like a messenger chat these days, like there's a meta-AI that will recap things. So if you don't know and you don't want to scroll up, you could just get it to recap and it will tell you this is the time that you're doing this. I like the recap thing. Yeah, I'm a bit, I don't want Mark Zuckerberg knowing that we've been on the train yesterday.

Yeah, me neither. Oh yeah, for sure. We literally put up photos on his social media networks of us on a train. And you're talking about it on air, but yeah, it's literally everywhere. I know, but giving them more power, you know. So apparently these fingerprintesses are absolutely draining their other friends, right? We're just like, oh my God. I'm so sick of this.

So the way to stop it is you've got to stop rescuing them. He's not listening, Haley. Sorry, what? Finger Princess. Yeah. What's happened? Sorry, catch me up on the last 30 seconds. What are we to tell him that?

You can go back and listen to it on the pod on the I-Heart app, to be honest, because I just cannot be bothered to expand you. How do we fix it? You stop responding, you stop rescuing them. Right, and then they have to do something. No. So here's one. Well, you try.

You try. You try. See how that goes for you. This isn't my first. There's two ways of doing it. If they hit you with a question, you go, Why don't you have a quick Google? Oh, you go, oh, where's the thing?

Why don't you have a quick Google? Not me. Why don't you do that? And then if they ask a question that's so obvious, say, what do you think? Well, that's just literally what Carlin does every time. Vaughn says he's like, well, let's try this. Let's try this. No, she says, it's in your calendar.

That's what she says to you. It's in your calendar. I've emailed that to you. We want me to open my work laptop? We all did. Yes, we all do. On personal time? Who do I bill for billable hours?

You are our fingerprints. Play that ends, Flesh Forne and Haley. Vaughn's $10 suburb. Vaughan's $10 suburb, $1,000 street is all thanks to the new One Roof app. Property Search just got easier with the new One Roof app. You can download it now. And we're going to randomly generate a suburb somewhere in New Zealand. This is how the game works.

If you are in that suburb and you're the first person to call through and prove that you're there, $10. $10. Immediately transferred to you. From my personal bank account. And I put the reference as winner-winner-winner chicken dinner. Vaughan's T-10-D-S. Right. Because I ran out of room.

I ran out of room. Are you one of those people that when you fill out a bank, the bank transfer you have to fill in every box or something? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. There always particulars reference everything. I'm like, ah. Yeah, if you're paying like an invoice,

it's got the invoice number, and then I always put my name in one, the invoice in the other, and then for the third, I'm just like, hello. Thank you. Yeah. Or something.

You're welcome. to your friend that later will come back to haunt them at our bank loan. Buzzing butt stuff. Okay, let's randomly generate a suburb. Anderson's Bay in Dunedin today. Oh, okay. A lovely Anderson's Bay. Anderson's lovely.

I'll say, Grace, you're not allowed to enter. Is that around the bay, is it? It is around the bay? It's sort of like the... It's in the name, isn't it? It leads out to Larnet Castle and the Albatrosses. Oh, the Albatross. Yeah, because I've been to the Albatrosses.

Yeah. It's a big suburb? It's a populated suburb. Okay. It's the home to... Well, I just say quickly, if you're in Anderson's Bay, in Denetim right now, 0,800 dollars at him. If you can prove you're there,

10 bucks a ruse. 10 inch of dollars plus... This cemetery is one of the largest in the South Island. It has two Victoria Cross recipients buried there. Yeah. And it was originally known as a rather grand name of the eastern necropolis. Isn't that a hell of a name for a cemetery?

Yeah, it's pretty fancy. Yeah. Well, nobody's calling through so far from Anderson's Bay. Anderson's Bay. If you're listening in Anderson's Bay, and they might be in Highcliffe. Well, we could be... Waverly.

banging it there. Yeah, you need to be in the suburb, Anderson's Bay, as dictated by the New Zealand Post Code for that area. 0,800 dials at him. The last time I saw the Albatrosses, I got to go right up close to them and saw the dock workers weighing them and it was so much fun.

But the albatross are not in Anderson's Bay, are they there further around? They're further out, then around. They're heading out that way. Okay. They might fly over. Okay, looks like we've got somebody heading into. Into Anderson's Bay. But not quite in Anderson's Bay.

People are calling through, but you've got to be in the suburb. Amelia, good morning. Hi, how are you? Really good. Are you claiming to be in Anderson's Bay to need him right now? Yes. Yeah. What street are you on, Amelia?

Spencer Street. Spencer Street. Let me see if that's within our map. Is that what you put up? Yeah, smack, yeah, you're right. That's it. That's nice. That's right next to a lagoon called Tomahawk Lagoon.

You could have asked her that as a... Oopsie. I got excited because I saw the word Tomahawk. Yeah. She sounded like she didn't know. We're about to you on this street. I'm at home. Okay.

You live in point. So I look down to Tom Hawk Lagoon and just at here with my wee boy. Angus is playing on the mat rolling around. Oh, I was going to say, how old is Angus? He's four months. Okay, so he's not about a, he's not about a verifier in the dress there. You're going to say, like, 15 and Angus is rolling around. I was like, probably a bit too old to be rolling around on the mat, Angus.

Now, when was the last time you had a good roll on the ground? Great for the back. Really? Okay. I did it for three years and I paid $48,000 for it. It's called an acting degree. Yeah, not a roll. Okay, well, how do you want to verify?

Could you go on the street? I don't want to give the, I don't want to give out. Is there anything in the lagoon area? that would, she could verify maybe. Are you familiar with an accommodation on your street? Yes, edgily bed and breakfast. We don't say that word here. Did she know that? No, that is...

Edgely. We don't say that word here. You could say Zemly bed and breakfast, please. That'll be... Okay, so that's it. She's on her way. Just... She's in the suburbs. She's in, wait a minute, though. What colours the Zemly bed and breakfast at the end of the road?

Sort of yellow and green, and there was... Fun fact, there was a big tree on that property, and it fell down in the big winds last year, and it made so much better sunlight and everything. I was hoping that tree would fall down for years. Oh, what a blessing. Everybody's got a tree they want to see fall down, eh? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've got one too.

I've got one too. I love a tree. Okay, so she's a $10. She's there. She's a $10. Winner. Congratulations, Amelia Vaughn will instantly transfer you $10. You ain't, well, oh, well, we've got a sec, but hold on.

Yeah. Producer Shannon is. bringing in the $1,000 street envelope. Envelope? I don't know what I say. Oh my God, Fletcher. I think this on the tour all the time. Do I say envelope or envelope?

I don't know. The tenderly. Open the envelope. Envelope sounds Porsche. Envelope. Envelope. I have in my hand an envelope. It's perfect.

We're going to open this up. Now, just a reminder, Amelia, what street are you on? Spencer Street. Spencer Street. How many streets are there in the suburb? Just roughly looking at the map. Quite a few. Yeah, but not as many as other suburbs we've had.

Is it a big burb? It is a reasonably size one. It seems to be primarily residential, so there's probably lots of houses in there, but it's not the biggest. Okay. Okay. Good envelope opening. Amelia.

The $1,000 street today in the suburb of Anderson's Bay. Fletch, would you please read what it says on this place of over? Is that? Is that? Is it? The $1,000 Street is Spencer Street. It has been one before. We've been so close before, but we've also been miles away.

To some suburbs, it's gigantic. But Amelia, congratulations. You won. If that tree hadn't been blown over, that $1,000 would have taken care of somebody taking care of that tree. But now $1,000 is... I would have been putting some copper nails in that tree with $1,000. I really like Amelia.

She knows how to kill a tree. I do too. I do, too. Amelia, congratulations. You're the winner of $10 suburb, $1,000 Street, all thanks to the new Wonderof at Property Search. It's got easier. You can download it now.

Well done. Amazing. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's FlashForn and Haley. Who is the most famous person that is in your phone or that has your number? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll take either of them. Take either.

Why is this? Why is this? Why is this? So Jade from Little Macs, the band, was being interviewed by a like on an eye heart radio interview, by the way. Right. Ding dat bell. Yeah, ding the bell for company synergy.

Now I know I get blind to the bell. I can see it and I'm on Zoom. Where? Just give it a second. It's over to the side. Give it a second. Found it. And you were in glasses?

I can literally see it on. I'm in Australia. You guys are going to feel so bad about teasing men for not seeing the bell when it's revealed I haven't had a brain trem of the entire time. I'll apologise them But until then Until then It's embarrassing

But I will apologise If the doctors find it Yeah Before it kills you Jade from Little Mix Was being interviewed On I heart Thank you

By a guy called Miles Galloway Who apparently 11 years ago Had interviewed her Much earlier in her career And his career And had said afterwards Like oh you should come out

And play some music With us and something and got her number. So he had had her number in his phone for 11 years as she got more and more and more and more famous. And then she was interviewing her. He was interviewing her and was like, I've still got your phone number.

Is it still the same? And they checked. And she was like, that's my number. And he was like, you never text me back. It's a little awkward. Yeah. I mean, she was never going to text him back. Let's be honest.

No, no, no, definitely not. Like, he's a six and she's a 10. But I want to know. And also why, like how you got the number. Who is the most famous contact in your phone or the most famous person that has your phone number? I just don't. And Haley before I was like, what's yours?

And she said, I've got Jason's. Jason's. Jason Gunn. You've got Jason Gunn? You've got Gunny. You've got Gunny. I've got Lily from Big Same furniture. I've got Lily too.

Yeah, we love Lily. I hope Lily hasn't changed her number. She's my emergency contact. She answers the phone. I've got too many sofas. They've got to go. Is this emergency contact?

He's been a man here who's been hit by a bus? He's actually, and we've discovered he's got a brain tumor, which is just making it hard for him to see silver things on the desk right in front of them. And we can't get a hot of his other emergency contact, Fletch, who is refusing to apologize. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not apologising.

I think I've got it. No, I don't have anyone. I don't have anyone, yeah. I got Jason Gunn sent me a lovely message a little while ago. Well, you've got John Campbell. I got John Campbell. He said, that's nice. That's nice.

Richard. You've got Jacinders. Oh, yeah. You've got the former Prime Minister. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you're doing all right. I've got a lot of people on my phone with last nicknames.

All right. No, Jace. That got hookups. Any famous ones? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and flags. You've got a lot of people with just sort of descriptions of flags. As flags.

What country that's wrong. Yeah. No, I've got no one. Gary Builder. Is Gary Builder famous? No, that's the builder. What about Bruce Building Inspector? That's Bruce, the building inspector.

I've got, um, Joe, Cotton from True Bliss. Oh, yep, yep. You used to work with Joe, lovely Joe. What else? Is that it? Well, that's lame, isn't it? Do I delete dead people?

I've just seen a couple of people who are not longer with us in my phone. I've just seen a whole bunch of getting you delete. I do. Oh, really? This is what we want to know this morning. And we don't want their number. We don't want to sland it. No, no, no, no.

We're never going to make you ring them or anything like that. We're just saying, do you have a famous person? Matt Gibbs just messaged me. He's offended. We haven't mentioned them. Oh, Matt. Oh, Matt. We're not allowed to mention Matt

because Haley and Matt are at war now because they do shows about houses. Yeah, they do. What's that show about houses? The rural one. It's one of TVNZ's most popular summer programs. Oh, I'm sorry, Matt. Well, you can suck it, mate.

My house, my castle, Wednesday's tonight. Matt's rural houses on TVNZ. Yeah, Matt, you also need to send me an updated profile picture. That's an old one. Although, MacG also doesn't age. Oh, it's actually new contact photo available update of updated. He doesn't age. He doesn't age.

He doesn't age. He doesn't age. He's fit, eh. Is he still dating the penguin? I think so. It's going really well. That's been to get there a long time. Longer than us, I think. Yeah.

The penguin wasn't called squirt, which was weird. It was the TV show that was called squirt. Yeah. Was the penguin not called Squirt? The penguin was called Dorothy. Nope. Hell message. With his new contact photo.

What was the Swirk? 0800 d'Ars.m is the number. You can text a 9-6-96. 966. What was the penguin on squirt called? Who is the most famous person in your phone contacts? the most famous person that has your number. Matt's messaged against.

It was Spike. Spike, depending on a course. I should have just been called Squirt. It would have made so much more sense. Why was the show called Squirt? It's also like, upon reflection, I'm like, not a great name. Just been sat here all just fishing through our phones,

being like, who's in here? Haley just found the number for the landlord. Has it rented in years? I was like, who? Which land? A couple of dead people? I've deleted contacts out of my phone before, and then my phone just, like, backs up to the,

the cloud or whatever and drags them back onto my phone because I saved them to like a cloud or something? Yeah, I don't know. I just figure I'm just going to have this roller decks forever. Why do I have Colin Mathura Jeffrey? I've never met him in my life. On it once. What are you doing there?

So, 0800 dials at M-9-686. Who's the most famous person in your phone? Charlotte, who have you got in there? I've got Nadia Lim. Oh, we love Nadia. We love Nadia. We love Nadia. We love Nadia.

Did you work on the farm? Sorry Did you work on the farm Um Yeah I worked in the butchery Oh Like a little abattoir On the farm

Yeah Yeah How good I think the last time she came in She bought a whole lot of sausages And meat Yeah Yeah

Thanks for that by the way Charlotte Great work in the abatto Probably yeah Made by you Yeah Yeah Lovely

Are you a butcher her Charlotte I'm a chef By trade But I dabbled in some butcher Yeah I quite enjoyed it Oh, butch her.

I get it now. I said butch her. What's your favourite thing to butch? The sausage machine? I'm pretty a deer. A deer. I've actually got some, I've actually got some venison waiting for me in the Waikato.

Someone kindly messaged saying, I've just had a bit of a field or something. No, he's butchered it and everything. He's waiting in a freezer for me. Well, he's not in a field just getting mauled by flies and stuff. Charlotte, thank you. Some messages in are the most famous person on your phone. Susie Kato.

Oh, so my contact last year on royalty. We were both. bridesmaids at a wedding together. National treasure. That's lovely. Oh my god, Susie Kato would be such an amazing bridesmaid. She would be, wouldn't she? Yeah. Yeah, lovely. And now sing for us. Sing, sing, sing, sing. She'll be like, hi, I'm Susie Kato, I'm here to do my speech. It's our time.

And you'd be like, yes. That's all we're hoping for. Psychic medium Sue Nicholson. I've been her hairdress over 24 years. Okay. Someone said Hillary Barry's mum. Oh, we love the hillbaz. Somebody heard Fletch say Lily from Big Save and they said, I used to date her brother,

I've got the whole family. Oh, we don't have the whole family in our phone, do we've been to have got Lily. Just Lily. I mean, that's enough for me. I don't want to be greedy. You don't want the whole family. I don't need the whole family.

Keep your text coming in, 966. The most famous person in your phone contacts. Okay, so we asked us on Instagram too. And we've got international people following us on Instagram because the internet is everywhere. Yeah. Someone said Ronan Keating. What?

Oh, get out. How do they have his number? I'd send him the roller coaster emoji. What's the song? Yeah, I know. I know. I'd send him a heart and then roller coaster. Isn't that life as a roller coaster?

Life is a roller. Well, I've cocked that out with Ronan, haven't I? Love is wrong. No, it's life is a roller coaster. Life is a roller coaster. Let's get excited. says the guy who's never really known the lyrics.

Life is a roller coaster. What does he say next then? Life is a roller coaster. Yeah, life is a roller coaster. You're thinking, you might be thinking of the red hot chili peppers love roller coaster. That's a great song.

That one. A roller coaster. Okay, we'll keep going. Thank you. Oh, brilliant. Thank you. I appreciate this. Some other Instagram responses

on who's the most famous person in your phone book. Taboo from the Black Eye. P's. Oh, okay. Our sons go to school together in L.A. Cool. I have Gordon Ramsey's PA. I met him at work.

I'm so lovely. Offered his phone number for a free dinner. Oh. They were offered his number. Jeremy Clarkson's daughter's husband's mother. Did that now that's... Dr. Clarkson's daughter married a man and he's... Yeah.

I think that's a bit of a stretch, to be honest. Someone said I could ring Sarah Gibson and asked for Dave Gibson, the lead singer of Alam M-N-O-P. Love Dave. He's a great man. Dave's a great man. One of my friends was of What Now once. I don't know. At least they were the host of What Now, my love.

George, internationalist, George and I talk about aeroplanes in Star Wars. Oh, yeah. So, you know, we're buds. And he hasn't told me this. My best mate is Tilda Swinton's son. What? And I didn't know this for the first month of being mates,

but my best mate is the son of Tilda Swinton. You probably wouldn't, if you were the son of someone famous, you probably wouldn't tell someone until they liked you for who you were. Yeah, right? Because, you know, Tilda Swin is such a catch. Yeah. As a person, you're like, oh, man, I wish my mate's mom was Tilda Swoon. God, I wish I was friends with someone. No, no, she's a cool actor, but you're not going to, like, wheeling friends with, hey.

No, but, you know, some people might be... ...one of her generation's best actors. But some people might be weird about it, you know what I mean? Yeah. You think so. Yeah, I think so. I had the Hadee's mom's ex-boyfriend's phone number, because I found his dog on the road.

Oh, okay. The Hadid's mom's ex-boyfriend. Did you get a reward? You'd expect a reward from the Hadid's misdemeanor.

The Hadid's adjacent. Hadid adjacent. Yeah. Anonymous joins us. Anonymous. What's the most famous person in your phone contacts?

Josh Devine from his One Direction Strummer. Wow. Oh, okay. Josh Devine. And can we ask how you got that number?

Um, we're just, like, friends. We became friends through, like, social media and stuff. Okay. And, yeah, he just, like, was like, oh, yeah, I trust you. Here's my number. If you ever need anything. Oh, wow. Okay.

Have you needed anything, like, one direction tickets? Uh, you know, I don't know about that. Well, if there's ever a tour. You know what I mean? Give it a go. Give it a go. Anonymous, thank you. Finish up a couple of quick text.

I've got Right Honourable Oh, Helen Clark And the phone number Oh, get out Aaron Cruden, who was an all-black Yeah, I sold him a car a couple of years ago, Top bloke

And it's weird, eh? You'd be like, Oh, you said it's a number What are you going to do with it? Yeah That's an unusual one. Because if you were like real famous, would you have a burner number

That you gave to people that were like Maybe Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, yeah Lead singer of the DRAX project Him and his wife Katzat for us a few years ago Before the Drats project was big

Cat Sat Cat Sat Wonder if they got a good rating. On the cat, I'm a cat sit. Well, you because when I have a cat sitter, you rate them out of five. Yeah.

Okay. Like good pets. Five out of five. Didn't burn the house down. Five out of five. Cat not dead. Five out of five. Someone's got Lisa Carrington's number.

Oh, lovely. Someone said, I've got that guy who was the drummer in ACDC. Remember whenever he was in the news, he lived in Torong, it was always bad news. See, I used to Mars Lawn who's an absolute tool. Really?

Kim.com. someone's got kim.com's number. Someone's here said Shannon Trim is probably my most famous contact. That's our producer Shannon. Right. That's our girl. Is that a magician boyfriend messaging?

Do you recognize that number, Shannon? No. No, she doesn't. No, she doesn't recognize that number. No. Yeah, there you are. You're on. Hi.

No, she's on. Oh, hey. Hi. Sorry, our buttons aren't working. Just having button issues. No, I search them in my phone and I don't have that person's number saved. That's awkward.

So it could be a guy from a club, or... Famously wants a club promoter. I love the club promoter. And then someone's texted in my boyfriend's name, so, you know. Did they hire him for wizardry? Yeah, he had at a gig recently. Someone came up to and said, are you producer Shannon's boyfriend?

And I think it really got to him. The ZN Podcast Network play ZN's FlashForn and Haley. Well, we got dragged into a meeting, a marketing meeting. Which we love. We love meetings. They're listening, they're listening. We love meetings. We love a meeting.

No, I don't care if they're listening. I don't like me. Well, we do love the lovely marketing department, and they said to us, they said to us. They're ugly faces yours up on a billboard, they said, after, you know, public outcry. That regardless of how much AI we pumped into it, you still look like a three mingers. Yeah, they said, we're going to get you three mingers on a billboard, and we said, really that big? That's what the M and Z-EM stands for, Z-Ming. It's from our German ancestry.

Zimingers. Zimingers? And they said despite all of our research saying it'll do the exact opposite of its intentions, people will tune out in their droves. Yeah, that's right. We're going to put your ugly minga faces on a billboard. And then we were talking about the fact that a lot of radio shows, you know, they've all got a slogan.

Ours was laugh out louder and maybe this is like, come on, have a giggle. You know, join us. Eat your breakfast with us. Yeah. Slurp up your cereal. Eat us with your ears. Yeah, yeah. Eat it.

Eat it. Eat it. Hate each other but have to work together. Yeah, yeah. Pretend we're friends every morning. So there's always a funny line and they were like, well, what do you want your line to say on the billboard? Under your face. And I said, this meeting's already going for too long.

So I was going to say that out loud. But then I said, rather, should we get the listeners to come up with? it like that and they were like wow Vaughan really cares. Great idea great idea. So that's what we thought is that rather than us try to think of a line to put on a billboard is that listeners, you

lovely listeners give us a suggestion and it needs to be a short short sentence. Yeah and I think rather than a you lovely listeners trying to come up with a zinger like happy mates laughing hysterically. After Olivia Dean songs. After Olivia Dean

plays for the fourth time. That would be a good one actually. Olivia Dean, Olivia and Olivia and that could actually be the thing, the people that talk after an Olivia Day song. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's universally loved Olivia Day. Exactly. Well, this is what we thought could be like more short, punchy reviews of the show, and we're happy for them to be somewhat self-deprecating.

So would we have the stars, like out of five, would it be like a Google review, and it would have five stars or four stars or three or two? And that's the other thing, I've all four, or if you think this is a two-star show, say it. Okay. And then tell us why. In like five words. For example, two stars, it's the only radio station I get in my car. Perfectly.

Great. Steph, total. They're already rolling in. What about four stars, I reckon they've all slept together. I don't think we need to feel that. Flame, do we? Same, flame. Yeah, also, no offence, but yuck.

No offense, but Mingers. Oh, Zingers. I can do so much better than you two. No offense. Okay, so an out of five-star rating. a less than one sentence review and your name. Okay, what?

Also, I'm tired. I don't want to be bullied today. The morning mingamunch. Well, no, that's just like a tagline. You know, but it's kind of still got to make people want to listen. Yeah, only slightly better than silence, four out of five.

That's good. That's good. That's good. It's good. It's better than silence. It's better than silence. Love that. It's better than silence.

Four to five. And then it would have the name, right, underneath I love this. It would say like Stephanie from Christchurch or whatever. Wait, someone said three stars. They don't replay songs as much as others. Well, I think if you check, Olivia Dean. I love that.

I love that. Okay. Well, this is what we want. So, 0,800 dials at end. Lovely Richard Hills has just messaged us. It's as good as it's going to get. That's great. I'm in Rich coming from Auckland Council.

But, sorry, if someone takes a shot, I have got a shoe bag. We got invited on this. trains yesterday. We're going to talk about that zone on the new city railroad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's actually very funny from Richard. That could go on a billboard. So this is what we want. So is it only listening for

Bryn the newsreader. Three out of five. Fantastic. He'll love that. He'll love that. He's back after his sick couple of days off. 8100 dials at Amazon number. Text through 9-696. Your... Don't please associate else. We're opening our names next to Epstein Island on a billboard?

9-14. 9-14, that's madness. No, no. No. Okay, a one sentence review of the show and how much out of five for the billboard, the new billboards, text in now. Zid M. Tell you what, dear listeners, you have absolutely come through with the new marketing slogan or the reviews for the show that are going to end up on the Fletchhorn and Haley billboards. Electronic billboards, so I think they can do heaps of these. I think we can do multiple. Weaponized bullying disguises professional radio, five stars. I mean, that's so cool.

Proof not everyone needs an opinion. Four out of five. Oh, great. Three friends, two brain cells. One star. Who's got the brain cells? Are we sharing them? Fletch.

It's you and me, babes. It's you and me. He can't even hear us. He can't even comprehend what we're saying. Sorry, do you say? Someone was reading and I simply can't read and listen. No, no, no. Nothing, my darling.

You carry on. I go, I'll carry on. Just better than the screaming kids in the car, 3 out of 5. Just better. Good, good. We'll take it. These Billboard reviews are going to be fantastic. Yeah.

Oh, that's a nice one. We're sitting the alarm clock for. Well, I don't, but I don't want it to be genuine. Yeah, I don't want it to be nice. I don't know how to process. I grew up as a child of the 80s and my parents never complimented me

and I've grown up now and I've got stunted emotional ability. I can't take compliments. Okay. But I like them, but I don't know what to do with them. Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of like fancy dinnerware. I like it, sure, but I don't know what to do with it.

Yeah. Yeah. Here for a good time, long time. Someone said, undiagnosed, but something's up, three stars. That is good. That is good. I can't afford a Bluetooth adapter. Two stars. Yes. I love that. It's a slightly self-deprecating, right? I love it. Yeah, but not like too much that Haley would cry, driving past the billboard. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep me laughing. Like white noise, they'll put you to sleep in seconds, three stars. Yep, okay. So, one star, they're always on bloody holiday.

I'll say we'll take a few break. I'll tell you what, it just doesn't feel like it on the send. Yeah. Just doesn't feel like it on the end. All the year, no idea. Yep, that's not bad. That's a good one.

Long time, listen to the first time reviewer, five stars. Oh, like that. Somebody texts in 1.5 stars like Barnett without the abs and deep blue eyes. Look, okay, we've let ourselves go a little bit. Yeah, we've grown up. So this time last year, I might have had something visible in the, department and this year is just back to being a fat hairy pookos. Sorry, I think it makes us charming, Vaughan.

Maybe that could be fat hairy pookos. Fat hairy pookers. Three of them, three of them to be fat hairy pocus. Three fat hairy pookers. Oh, oh, peak millennial cringe. Oh. I get that at home. I don't need to sit on a billboard.

Not me, though, eh? Not me. Text in. 9-6, 96. Not me, though. Don't. Please don't text in and tell her the truth. Because she won't be able to handle it.

Next minute, not me, eh? Wait, the millennial cringe is not me, Nick Minut. Dude, Nick Minut, not me? Yeah. The only station, the only show brave enough to talk about goat tits. That's right. Yeah, well, we did. It's great.

You catch the podcast there on Iheart radio. If you missed what was described to me as a message on Instagram, is some of the most disturbing things you've ever talked about. Really? Yeah. Well, I had no idea they were that big. I'll be honest. Huge, aren't they are.

What happened to Polly and Grant? It's literally twice. 12 years today. It is 12 years today since it was announced, yeah, that we were doing ZM breakfast. Yeah. For Zemingers. The Zemingers. Zeming is breakfast?

Who, is that what they look like? Two out of five. Yes, that's a good one. Is that okay with you, Haley? Yeah, I'll take it. I'm a minute at the moment. Oh, I know what I am. Yeah.

On the spectrum and on the airwaves. I don't know if they'll do that one. I don't know. I don't know. I don't reckon they'll do that one. Spot on, though. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

There's a great. There's a great. Yeah, this is really good. There's a lot to work with there. Yep. Well, I can, well, maybe after the show we'll whittle them down to like the top. Our favorites. Could be worse, two stars.

Literally could only just be worse if it's only getting two stars. Yeah. I like that one. I like that one. Maybe we'll put four stars, so it could be worse. Yeah. What's our billboard? Yeah, do what we want.

Faces for radio, not the voices. Oh, beautiful. Okay. Poetic, but also quite like. Oh, brilliant. Also, very backhanded. I genuinely thought we were quite hot. Apparently not.

Apparently not. Apparently not. So we'll whittle those down to the favourites and let you know what we've come down to. Moments of insight amongst an abundance of drivel. Two stars. That is spot off. That's so good. I love that.

I love that. Okay, thank you so much for your suggestions. For the Billboard marketing. We'll get those down to the final few. And I guess what vote on our favorites maybe or something like that. run through them. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh, Forne and Haley.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. A do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. It's all week here at fact of the day and today. And today I want to tell you about the names of Stuart Island because you might be like, Because you might be like, why we've got North Island, South Island, Stuart Island? Stuart's out there doing it. Why isn't that the South Island?

That's what some people... Southist. Some people on Stewart Island referred to the South Island as New Zealand. Oh, okay. And I laughed and I thought the Independent Republic of Raki Orra would actually be a rad little name. Could be a good little tourism campaign to it. Totally. I'll keep that under my hat until they invite me back.

They only get one Instagram post per time, you know. Right. Okay, fair enough. All right, it's gone by a bunch of different names. The oldest known name is the Māori name, Te Ponga or Te Waka a Maui, which means the anchorstone of Maui's canoe. Because if you're familiar with the legend,

the South Island was Maui's canoe. They fished up the North Island. Yes. And they had to anchor it to something. And it was the mooring point, Stuart Island, they're saying that was the mooring point of Maui's. It was like the anchor up, so it was the original island.

But if you look at the scale of things, the Waka, being the entire South Island, that would have been an under-sized undersized catch. Well, it might have been deep. No, I'm saying the North Island was undersized. You should have thrown it back. What are you kidding?

They pulled up a fish as big as their canoe. Yeah, if you were on a boat fletch and you pulled up a boat-sized fish. Even if you're on a dinghy. Yeah, I get. You're allowed a boat-sized fish? Is it too big? Oh, you're saying it's too big.

Might be too big. Or how are you getting it home? But then you see some people wheeling those marlins. It takes them hours. Yeah. Hours and hours. And there's actually a really cool sculpture. If you go to Bluff,

we get the picture with the sign. There's a sculpture of a chain going into the ocean and then over on Stuart Island there's a chain coming out of the ocean. Oh, that's cool. And it's really cool. And the chain on Stewart Island is rusty to imply that it's been put through the water. Right. The one that's to the bottom of the South

Island at Bluff is in as rusty because it hasn't been through the salt water to be tied to the anchor. Oh. So there you go. And the other name, Rakiura, is the Māori one that we're currently using. Glowing skies referring to the Aurora Australis. Yeah.

And the famous sunseers down there. Motinui, the big island, is another alternative Māori name that has largely fallen out of use. Here's one I'm glad we don't use. New Leinster. New Leinster. That son of Lister. Very precious. The name given in 1841 when it was established as one of three provinces of New Zealand.

It was only ever on paper and abolished after a few years. New Leinster, New Leinster, New Ulster. Oh, no. Imagine those were the names of our islands. I know, Yard. New Munster. Yeah. I'm catching the ferry to New Munster.

Yeah, lucky our country is not called New Zealand or they knew at the front. You always forget that they were just rocking around. You know, it's like on TV now everything's a remake, you know, everything's a reboot. That's what they were doing with names back in the 1700s. They just arrived somewhere and just chugging you on the front of it. So who was William Stewart? Well, he was a Scottish sailor. And that's who, you know, he's got the name banged on the front of the island.

He was the first officer on the Pegasus. And there's Pegasus Bay down there as well. So that's named after the boat. But when James Cook first put it on a map, he thought it was joined, and Banks Peninsula was an island. And this was the guy that were dumb back then, have you seen maps?

Fah-K. Why didn't they just put the drone up? Why didn't they put a drone up? Do you check Google Maps. Google Maps? Yeah, hello. Check your phone, James Cook. Man.

Literally Google it, you dumb-ass. Duh. Also, I think a very interesting thing is a lot of places in Strait Island were named after people that never even went. It was that thing where you were trying to impress a politician

somewhere else because you wanted to advance your career. or somewhere down the line, like the Patterson Inlet, which is this beautiful, massive inlet slash harbour situation. The dude never even went there. He was a lieutenant governor of New South Wales. Never stepped foot there, but they named it after a matter. Oh, he names, something after you.

Brown noses. Yeah. Brown noses. Doesn't work these days. Nah, mate. So today's fact of the day is while we go by Raki Ilura, Stuart Island now, Stuart Island's had a few names. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

I do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. Play ZDM's Flesh, Vaughan and Haley. If you were listening around this time yesterday, we surprised Vaughan with an announcement. And the fact that we were after the show going to go on a tour of the city rail loop, the brand new tunnels. The new line that is going to open sometime later this year. Yep. in underground Auckland. And I tell you what.

We did. We did, and it was amazing. So we stopped at the two brand new stations. And one reminded me of New York. Three brand new stations. Oh, yeah, yeah. That way the number five Mount Eden Station was there, but they've redone it. Yeah.

But the two ones that they did the underground stop off. Oh, my God, they were incredible. I've never been to New York, but one of them reminded me of New York Subways from the movies. and one reminded me of the tube. Well, so people were saying, like I had so many comments because I put up some stories of the two new underground stations and so many people message saying,

what? This looks like something overseas. I was like, yes. I know. World class. Also, the second most commented thing was how long until this gets tagged? Yeah.

The first day. We hope not. I tell you, it was incredible. So we jumped on at Henderson. Yeah, we did. and we went all the way through to Waitamatta, Brutemart Station and it was great.

It was great. It was incredible. It was fantastic. It was like when we turned into the tunnel and then we're in a tunnel and they're like 43 metres underground and I was like that. But like so because the trains are shut for it

the next couple of days they're doing full testing of the network. Oh yeah, you got told off. We only got 45 to 50 seconds on the platform. So like it was the same amount of time that they'd stopped to pick up passengers and then just go. Yeah, they were running timed tests

Yeah, so we literally had to get off and we only got that much time at the new state. I could have stayed hours just walking around a look like that. It was so beautiful. And had that new concrete smell, which isn't a scented can where you're going to find anywhere, but it's not the latest to call you. Yeah, that new.

Yeah, that new concrete smell. My favorite one was probably Kananga Ahape station. It's like the most underground and it was beautiful. It's really fun. Oh, so good. It's a very fun. There's a video, FVHZM of Vaughn's helmet cam. Yeah.

And there'll be a video sometime today, I believe, of the actual stations in the tour that we got. But yeah, very cool. So thank you for hosting us, Auckland Transport. Looking forward to that, gets handed over to AT in, I think, June sometime. And then later this year, it'll be open. And they're going to do open days as well at the station, so you can have a nosey at some stage. If you like tunnels, we love a nose, you don't wait. We like tunnels.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's FlashForn and Haley. We want to know from you right now How did your parents trick you? How did they lie to you? What were the little things that they did That were dishonest? What's the famous one that parents

Would tell their kids about the Mr. Whippy? The Sirens On means the ice cream. Yeah. Oh. If the sirens on, he's letting you know That unfortunately he's run out of ice cream. Yeah, yeah. And then just hope the kids don't see him selling ice creams

And if he stops, he's just telling people He doesn't have ice cream. I don't have any ice creams on Mr. Whippy. Of course. That's the kind of thing I want to know right now. Okay. Because there is a mum who tricked her son. This is an American, he's a massive Dodgers fan.

And obviously you can't as afford to go and see the Dodgers all of the time. He could travel and all this, all this money. So she would just take him to a local game. What's it called? Baseball. Local baseball game and say, look, it's the Dodgers. And he was like, oh my God. So she's like online like

baseball games near me. Right, yeah. Just goes down to the local park. Go down to the local park. Bring him down there and be like, holy moly, my son, this is the Dodgers. And because he's so young, he doesn't know. He was, he's just, he's elated, like, and he doesn't care. I love that.

And like, what, no harm, no foul, right? Yeah. Good baseball pun there. No harm, no foul. Fowl. Fowls. Yeah, that's why I did it. That was intentional.

I am. That's why. I did it. Is it? Is it? My sporty friends. Okay, well, let's get the ball rolling. Jess is called through.

Jessica. What was, what was. a lie or trick that your parents played on you? Good morning. So on road trips, obviously, you'd see a sign on the side of the road that was watched for road slump. Yep. And they obviously got tired of us winging. So they said that a slump was an animal that we had to keep an eye out for. And it had one side of its legs were short. One side of its legs were long and it could only run around the mountain one way.

Jesus, this is strange. It keeps us entertained, I'm sure, until the point why got horrifically upset this. It ran past it's free that had to go around the whole mountain again to find them because it couldn't turn around and go back. And so you'd be quiet looking for the road slump animal. Yeah. Yeah. Whereabouts was this? I'm not overly

familiar with signs that say watch for slumps. I'm assuming it's somewhere near like Alexandria. Oh, like it used to go to Black family holidays. It's a rock fall sign, right? Like a slump in the road. Oh, yes. That go up and down.

Yes. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's so good. And how long did you believe that for? Oh, for a good five years. Yeah, I love it.

And it would have kept you quiet in the car for those times too. That's so good. Thank you, Jessica. Keep your text coming in, 9-696-0-800-Darze at Emerson number. How your parents tricked you when you were young, because one mom, their little son wanted to go to the Dodgers all the time, and she can't afford that, so she just went to a local football. baseball game and he was happy. Well, she's certainly not the only one lying to her children.

No. My auntie told my cousin James that he's a very, very good boy, he'd be allowed to have his tonsils out. Oh. Reverse psychology. Yeah, and then he's one day the doctor's like, you've got to go to hospital, get the tonsils out? He's like, yes.

Yeah. Oh, my good boy. When my sister would misbehave my dad would trick her by putting her in the boot of the car, got it happened in the 80s and taking her to the naughty girls school. He would pretend it to make a phone call to Mrs. Hannigan to check there was space for her and then drive her to an abandoned house

slash church and pretend it was the naughty girl's school to teach her a lesson. And it would look haunted and like you wouldn't want to go in there? Oh my God, that's... I love that. Love a bit of psychological torture there. Yeah, I love that too. Lisa, what did your parents do to trick or lie to you?

When I was a catar up a farm and we used to have spring lamb for Yeah, well, yum. Spring lamb was goat. It was wild goat off the farm. Oh, it was wild goats. So because it tasted different to lamb, you're like, this taste different. No, like, because it's spring.

Oh, right, okay. Very lean, very lame. I thought you might have had a problem eating the lambs, but you didn't have a problem at all eating the lambs. No, no problem eating the lamb. Just how he's convinced the children to eat the goat. Yeah, right. It would be weird for a kid to think about eating a goat, wouldn't it? Yeah, it wasn't a bit strange?

Weird how we'd happily eat a cute little lamb, but you won't accept. But it's just a manky goat. You don't want to eat the manky wild feral goats. Ah, thank you, Lisa. A friend of ours takes their kids to time zone and lets them run around and tap the empty cards on the machine. And they're like, yeah, you're playing that game so well. But they're just sitting in the machine watching the screen, basically. I once flitted with a guy who didn't let the girl flatmates mow the lawns.

It was very weird about it. Eventually, admitted it was because his mom had taught him that the pressure and the angle of using the lawn was very bad for ladies' internal organs. What is that? So his mum was like, I don't want to mow the lawns. And he's like, Mom, mow the lawns. She's like, I can't. It's the angle.

It's very bad. Internal pressure on the female. My lady bits. My lady bits. And he's like, I don't want to talk about your lady bits. Oh, look at my lawns then. I have to tell you about my lady bits. God.

My mum used to tell me that the onion in a McDonald's cheeseburger was actually just big rice because I said I didn't like onion. I had to admit it. I was in my late teens when I found out that that was actually onion and not rice. Oh my God, that's good because it is, they do chop it finely. It's a diced onion. Yeah. It's a diced onion. Yeah.

So good. Okay, keep them coming in, 9-6-96-0-800 dials at them the lies and tracks that your parents played on you. We were talking about the lies that your parents told you maybe to get you on board with something or maybe to get you to do something or just get your step back. Just to shut up, really. Just shut up. Yeah, you're making happy, show you up. There's a few rippers here about telling kids how you know they're lying.

Now one of them is, that their eyes changed colour. So when their kids started lying, they'd shut their eyes so you couldn't see their eyes changing colour and this telling you that they were lying. Somebody else said, I told my kids that when they were lying, I could tell by looking at their tongue

because it looked different. And so you have to start this really young and it's obvious that they're lying and then it gets less obvious. They hide their tongue and they're talking or the tongue or the carry of their mind. Oh my God, that's so good.

That's genius. My dad told me that the word condom was short for condominium because I started asking questions too young and he didn't want to deal with it. Fair enough. That's so good. He said a condominium and it's a big building in Wellington.

I got into a fist fight at school with some kid who was calling my dad a liar and I was defending his honour. He was pretty embarrassed when he had to come into the principal's office to explain why I was in my own mind telling the truth. Not where that story was going. Vaughn, do you lie under the girls or have you been known to? No, not really. Trick him?

I don't think so. I don't think there's been many many. tricks. Okay. I don't think so. Some of these sound like great parenting hacks, though. When I was coaching under 10 football, I'd tell the kids that only had two minutes left in the game when there was 10 minutes left, so they'd play so hard thinking the whistle was

going to go any minute. And then they'd say, how long to go now? And if there's five minutes, I'd say, there's a minute to go. Worked every time the kids were absolutely bugger by the end of the game, but we won the league because these kids were running around. That's so good. They had limited time. Yeah.

They're also probably screwed for time management for the rest of their lives. Yeah. Yeah. They're constantly late. No gauge on it. early to things. When I was younger, we were told we were going to Lego Land. But on the day, my granddad didn't want to go to Legoland,

and we went sight seeing at a castle instead. My parents told us that the castle was actually Legoland, and we were very excited for years. I told my friends I'd been to Legoland, and it was weird, because Legoland actually had no Lego at all. I only found this out a few years ago, and I was always confused why Legoland had no Lego. There's been a few of those texts where people have found out later in adult life,

and it's so funny. So much later. Yeah, it's so good. My dad asked me if I wanted BK for dinner as a treat. Heck yeah, we went and got BK and then over dinner he told me mum and dad were separating. At least you got a whopper though. Or a BK chicken with cheese.

My brother had car sickness and instead of always buying car sick pills my parents would just get tic tacks and put them in the same medicine bottle, work your treat. Real mental, though? Psychological. Yeah. Okay.

My dad pretended he didn't understand or speak English when I was born until about seven years old. What? My brother is six years older than me So the trick didn't work Because he wanted us to be fluent in his native language And so he pretended he couldn't speak English

Oh right That's why they were doing it Yeah Yeah but you do that for a little bit Not seven years Seven years is a while at a time Surely you just speak both right Yeah

Yeah okay weird When I was a kid we went to visit My grandparents on the West Coast My parents told us kids That we were having West Coast ham for dinner Many many many years later We were told it was actually cow tongue But they knew we wouldn't need it

Now someone, I tell you what, cow tongue tacos. I do have them last year. They were so young. I'll make it. You'll love it. I've tried it. I've tried it.

Remember it? I've heard it before. It's yum ads. My friends, mum used to tell her that the pet lambs were going to live their life out at the neighbours. And the neighbour's name was Mr. Abitoy's house, ma'am. So they'd be like, have they gone to Mr. Abitwis house, ma'am.

Yeah, they have. It's so good. We always told her daughter any time we went past the park, and she'd be like, please, can we go to the park? I'd be like, oh, no, that one's closed. It's got shit. all over it. Shit.

And they just grew up thinking every playground had shit on this life? Covering shit, yeah. You get pooping in these playgrounds. I tell my kids that when you break a promise, a fairy dies. Oh. So my five-year-old daughter always says yes, but I don't promise I will. So she's saying yes, but she doesn't want to kill a fairy. That's funny.

That's good stuff. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flash for an Havort and Hay. Now just a quick update before we get to our quicky little poll this morning. This time yesterday we spoke about the fact that I was eagerly and excitedly awaiting for the delivery of my Samsung fridge. One of those ones is an ice maker. Yeah, I've never had one of those, Mark. I know, I know.

Well, you know, I've seen Vaughns and I'm like, now I want an ice maker. It's living, baby. Can you imagine the parties before we go like to a concert? We're going to have ice in the door of the fridge. Yeah, because I'm always bringing an ice bag to yours. smashing it on the floor. You get through it pretty quick though if everybody's going yeah well we can always pop downstairs for some ice but I'm so so excited and then I mentioned it didn't fit in the front door yeah yeah and then you were like let's say the

door jam off the door and people were messaging in we did have Todd's message in Todd the builder remember he said don't take the door jam things off because you'll run into problems and I said what does he know and he said he's actually a builder and I said well so he knows all of it he knows he's been through this Todd message and saying he wants an up Well, I'll tell you what the update. The builder took the door off the hinges. Yeah. And it fit.

Just slipped down. Didn't even have to spit on it. Didn't even, no, we had millimeters to spare, but we got it in. Because I heard from some builders and they said, if she's tight, I'm an official master builder or registered master builder. Yep. Spit on it. I don't think that's spurn.

Spit. Well, I did ask them not to spit on the brand new fridge, but it's inside. So they update is, the fridge is inside. And we'll probably never leave the apartment. Great. No, no, no. It will just be sold as a chattel. Yeah.

Going forward, yes. Quicky little poll today is, would you be annoyed if a cafe served you the end piece of bread? Say you're getting some toast with some eggs on it or some avocado business. And you get the butt of the bread. We did this as a silly little pole a while ago, didn't we? Do you eat the ends of the loaf? Yeah, what do you do with them?

And most people don't. No, but you leave them in the bag and then you thumb under them the whole time getting the good slices. And then dad's like, oh, whatever, they's going to waste. And then he eats them. Or you just chuck it outside. Put them in the freezer for three years. Yeah.

Well, a woman has gone viral because she posted a TikTok of her avocado on toasted a cafe, scraped off the avocado and egg because she realized that she'd been given the butt of the loaf. And she's like, would you be upset at a cafe if you were given the butt of a loaf of bread? And most people are like, yes. Yeah.

So we asked in a cookie little poll, and 88% of people said yes, they'd be annoyed if the cafe served them the end piece of bread. 12% no. Yes, see? But it is waste. But then at the same, she's eating avocado. She's got like poached eggs, avocado. I think there's enough, like, mush to hide it. But, yeah, you still wouldn't?

Stevie says, as a lifelong cafe worker, usually those pieces of brie get yeated into a younger staff member's head. or put aside frozen and eventually used for bread crumbs when you have enough of them to make a decent batch of bread crumbs. Oh, that's a good idea. That's a great idea. Yeah, okay. Jen said, listen, I bought a thing of bread from the bakery. Oh, beautiful.

They took off the ends before bagging. No, they just flipped them around. What do you mean they flip? So they sliced the bread at the bakery and then flipped them around. So it looked like it had no ends. Oh, so you're not seeing it crushed. Yeah. Alicia, food is food.

As a nanny, I basically live on coffee's apple. peeling bread crusts. Oh yeah, that's that to be right. Yeah, you're paying for it, a cafe. Yeah, but you're paying for it. Yeah, exactly. I need them at home, but if I was at a cafe fair. Because you know the other thing at cafe is it annoys me is when you get the end slice,

like you get a delicious slice. Like it's got the icing on it, but it's got the end crust. Oh, no, I like the end slice. Sometimes you get a bit of icing spillover. Yeah, I like that. And it's going to be nice and chewy. Yeah, there's a chewy bit on the end of that slice. I don't like it when you go to a cafe and it's scrambled eggs

and sometimes they give you one piece of toast and sometimes they give you two. Now, where's the consistency here? Well, do you want one or two? I want two. Or sometimes I'm happy with one. Yeah, I know, but I've paid the same way. That's just my little quorum. MS.

Emory said any end bit of bread can get in the bin, apart from if it's an end of a banana bread. Oh, yeah, or gingerloaf. Slice theory. Yeah, you've got a bit of a crunch there. Yeah. Yeah. I love the butt.

Says Riannan. Okay. We are talking about bread. Bread? We talk about the bread? Yeah. I'd be confused. I'd be so annoyed as I'm gluten-free

and they already charge me extra for a crumbly piece of gluten-free bread. The gluten-free bread butt is so hard and yuck. Yeah, it would be yuck. I mean, gluten-free bread, you have to eat it, don't you? Because you're gluten-in-tolerant, but it's the worst. It's just right for you.

It is, yeah. You've kind of got out of hash-brown. The Vogels one's good. The Vogels one's good. You could have a hash-brown. If I was running a cafe and the gluten-free toast would just be a big fat hash brown. Yeah, yum.

With no flour to hold it together. I'd say shots fired towards the caffeine. industry there if you're going to use the end bits of the loaf. Don't just respect us like that. It is very disrespectful. The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleth Warnin and Haley.

A journalist, an investigative journalist, this guy's working, he's chasing stories and everything, he's burning candles at both ends. A few years ago, decided to chuck it all in and go and work on his family's farm in Ireland. And he's returned. to journalism to write an article on how everybody should do this.

Just go move to a farm. I don't know how to do a lot of things. Like, this looks very hard. Even you've got a farm. It's learning. It's constantly learning, constantly changing. Yesterday when it was raining and I had to go inside and sort a few things. And, you know, I was like, oh, this is yuck and it's wet.

But I was just like, what's my alternative? Yeah, but you're just making your life harder. I know. But it's like, it could be easier. Move to a townhouse. And the only problem you have is what to watch on Netflix. No. What, so I share a wall with the neighbour?

I mean, some people are up to all sorts. It's a good goss. You can have a little listen. Yeah, it's all good. Lots of people do. I do. Yeah, no, totally. And if that ticks your box, if that floats your bike.

Right. But he's saying that he, what, I guess, was stressed out and everything. It was a step back. And he's just saying, you know, it's, if you're not happy where you are, you find your happiness. And it's brought him a lot of joy. He has brought him a lot of joy and a lot of happiness. We love joy.

We live for joy. Life is about joy. You should be filled with a bit more joy. And that's what I think, you can get a bit down on your job, can you? Can't you? You kind of, it's the, you're chain to it. You've got to be there for those hours. You need it.

And you do need it. And you do need it. Well, I know people that have, like, jobs you would say are very cool. You'd be like, oh my God, cool job. But they, sometimes they don't like it. You're like, why don't you like it? Like, you've got the job they're running love. It's still work.

It's still work. We'd all rather just be on a beach in Italy with an apparel sprit. If we're being honest with ourselves at any given moment. So find the joy. Yeah. That's what I was thinking we could take some calls on today. What brings you joy? What brings you joy at work?

Those little moments. And you might forget sometimes because it's just a job and it's maybe got you down. And then someone just says one little thing and it reminds you what you're doing it for. Because I think humans we're geared to focus on the negative. Because we see it as a threat and we've got to be prepared. for threats and sometimes we forget the happy parts. Like I feel like if you were a nurse, it would be like quite a bit of hard. It would be extremely

hard and very challenging. But there would be those moments where maybe you save someone's life or something. Yes. And you're just like... Or maybe you're a cleaner. And you know when you were a kid and you'd clean your bedroom and then you'd clean it and then you'd walk away and you'd look back and be like, hell yeah. I reckon like people that do building and stuff and you'd always drive past.

Yeah, you'd always drive past me like, like I built that. Yeah. Like Pop was a house painter and he'd drive past right into his 80s. Painted that. Painted that, yeah, and you've got that sense of joy because you accomplished something. Yeah, you can see it. Yeah, I love it. I love it getting messages in.

Okay, I'm a residential cleaner. I love that I'm taking the mental load away by dealing with one of the most stressful things in a busy household and creating time that can be used in other ways to those people, such as, you know, spending time with family rather than spending time cleaning. Yeah, love that. I love my elderly clients too. They have done their time running their house now. Let me take care of your house and you for. relax and enjoy your twilight years.

Yeah, that's good. And it's important to have a job that brings you some meaning and joy. Yeah, yeah, it gives you a purpose. Someone said, I met the person who answers the phone when people call in to say they've won big lot of things. Okay. That would be a joyful job.

But you'd ask them for a minute. But they'd be like, um, um, um, excuse me. I'm like, just relax, just relax. Now, I'm just got to take my $25,000 fee. And that's why you wouldn't last a week in that job, Vorg. Okay, oh, 800,000. This is a question we want to ask you this morning. Text 9-696.

What brings your joy at work? What brings your joy at your job? Yeah, those little moments. And if you can't find it, start looking for one that will. I reckon. Well, are you? But sometimes you're stuck with it, aren't you? That's kind of hard sometimes.

People might just do their job, but then they might find joy in other parts of their work. Yeah, if you've got a job that is, you know, set hours, you can, you know, walk away from it and it doesn't invade your other parts. And maybe that works for you. Yeah, totally. Okay, some calls through.

are, Jen, what's the moment in your job that brings you joy? So I work in an Ikea place. Okay. And, yeah. And obviously, I just love helping the fact that I can help people see. But it's more, actually, I shouldn't say more, I love helping everybody. But the children that come in and I've got something called myopia, and you, there's a special lens that you can use for myopia, and it slows down the growth of the eyeball, which is sort of what the myopia does,

and it's not great. Okay. Yeah. So, yeah, I just love knowing that you can help reduce the growth of the eyeball for children to cause less problems later in life for them, which is lovely. Yeah. And I do a bit of Fly Brigade volunteering on the side. Oh, my God.

You're a good person. You are a very good sort. You're a good human, Jen. You're a good human being. Yeah. I've just started this job, in the eye centre and I absolutely rate it. I love it so much.

Have you ever had a kid come in and they haven't been able to sit? Because didn't your daughter got glasses and could see stars? It had been, yeah, yeah, she didn't think that's what stars looked like. And then she could see the stars, she got the glasses, she's like, whoa, because that happened gradually. Yeah, yeah. She didn't really know how bad her eyes were and then she got glasses, and yet it's a game changer.

Yeah, no, we've had a few kids in and they're definitely so cute and happy when they get their glasses. Oh, that's so cool. Do you get anyone like me who I wanted glasses so I lied, but I did such a bad performance of it that the... Oh my goodness. Yes, people... I wouldn't say adults do that.

No, kids. No, no, when I was a kid. No, I did this when I was a kid. Haley did it when she was 31. That's my age now. Maybe I should do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bit of a team show.

No, I actually do have glasses. But, yeah, no, kids do come in and want glasses because it's the cool thing. And then they don't need them. They're like, but I want glasses. Oh, my God. I got glasses on as a kid. it wasn't the cool thing. Nah, yeah, whereas now...

Anastasia turned it around for me. Yeah, I'm out of a girl! Jen, thank you so much, you kind, human. Susan, what brings you joy in your job? Gosh, my joy sounds shallow compared to gems. No. Joy is good joy. It's what office perks?

It's the office perks. Oh, okay. What we got? We get... We've got a drinks fridge. Okay. Full of juice, coke, You know, all those things.

Sparkly delight. Chocolate fish, marshmallows, musty bars, protein bars. Okay, this would bring me joy at my job. Wait, and this is not an vending machine that you have to pay for. It's free. No, no, all free.

Wow. That would bring me a lot of joy. That would bring me a lot of KGs. Joy and KGs. Susan, thank you so much. Some messages in. I'm a vehicle inspector, so I get to see and try. drive all different sorts of cars, stock or modified.

And also, outside of that, I'm a volunteer firefighter. A few people are saying that, well, volunteer firefighter brings them a bit of joy. Yeah, that's beautiful. Please give them some new fire trucks. Yeah, and pay them more. They're still, they're still stoking. Because they put out fires. I don't know if you know this.

Fires aren't great all the time. No, they're not. I don't want to put out fires. I want them to do it for me. When they get out of control, they can destroy things. Yeah. I'm a teacher in what brings me joy is getting notes from either the children or the parents that just say thank you.

And also, when a child remembers you. you many years later when they've had one million other teachers. Oh, that's nice. We'll chuck them some more money too while we're at. I reckon we'll give them a bit more money. Yeah. Happy to do that. I work for an ambulance service. Hard work, but seeing my staff genuinely saving lives and making a difference is awesome. Yeah. Hearing a baby on the cry on the phone when they haven't made it to the hospital and given birth in the

ambulance. That's pretty special as well. Oh, wow. Wow. I manage a bowling alley in Arcade. Incredibly stressful managing a team of 50, 18 to 16 to 18 year olds. Yeah. And the machine, the ball gets jammed in the machine. Always gets jammed in that shoot, doesn't it, at the bowling alley? Ripping it down there. But getting to see families making memories and the smiles on kids' faces

as they celebrate birthdays and stuff makes it worth it. Oh, that's nice. I'm a nurse at a rural GP practice. I love knowing our patients and their families and seeing things improve or being their support person in hard times. Oh, you know all the local guys, eh? Yeah. It's fairly like these people are like, so much joy

from what we do, but these people are so much better than us. Feels like selfless stuff out. Oh, he is one. I'm about to start working. is a Starship classroom teacher. Oh, see, like that's great. I'm super excited to be able to make the day of different kids who are there. I hope they all get better, though, because I'm a big crier. Because a lot of them are going through like a bit of hell, aren't they?

Yeah, some of the kids, yeah, geez. I work on a large dairy farm near Methan, spending every day in the country surrounded by my mountains is what I call being truly blessed. Couldn't imagine wake up to concrete. Love that. Vet nurse, very tough job at times, but I love seeing a patient walk again. Yeah. A tough day when you have to go around to Vaughn's and put down one of his chickens.

Yeah. I've just started doing that myself because that was quite expensive. I know it was on. I had it done once, it was quite expensive. I was like, oh, yeah, I reckon I can do that myself. Friday beers. Yeah, it brings your joy at the end of the way. Friday days.

We love it. We love a Friday. Filled up my car the other day. It's a work car, so I used the work card. That bought me a bit of joy. Yeah, I bet that would. Yes. I work with Lotto as well.

I had a $23 million call or call up, and I got to be the answer. phone it was probably the happiest phone call of my life. Especially if you knew that they like really dessert. Like not one of those lot of winners that's already won or lives in a mansion already. Like they actually really needed the money that would be nice. Oh yeah. Like life

changing. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Free coffee and it's bloody really, really good coffee. Yeah, right. Not the brown shit that comes out of our machine. No. No. The machine's not too bad. I've been actually having a couple. The machine's not too bad. That's not too bad. They've upgraded the machine.

I wouldn't push the milk button though. No. The milk button. You don't use the milk button on a work coffee machine. No. I use the milk button. No, never use the milk butter. You go black coffee and add milk.

Yeah, that's what you do. You don't use the. Because remember the maggots? I didn't know. I didn't know. I didn't know. There was maggots in the line. There was maggots in the line.

Yeah. Well, what do you want? They're just sharing our work. What do you want? Do you want a maggot chino or do you want a weevil chino? I don't know. A weave latte or a macketel lache? Play Z-ZMs.

Flash for Nihely. You know me, I could literally talk. I could talk the air off a brick wall. I love to talk. I talk for a living. And then when I'm done talking with you guys, I go and talk to a room full of strangers and try to make it funnier. Yeah.

That's all I do. But a lot of people don't like talking. It's particularly small talk, right? And people try to avoid it as much as people would be like, oh, I'm just sort of try to get away, slip away from this conversation. I think if I do try to avoid it, it's just because it's awkward or it's just inane. And it's a bit, it's like, what do you? you talk about the weather again with someone.

Yeah, it's got wet. Oh, it's cold. Now it's hot. Yeah, yeah. It's like, how many times you do this? There is benefit from small talk. According to nine experiments done in this huge study, 2,000 participants.

They all took out of nine experiments about small talk and how it actually improve their day or improve their mood. So they were given many topics to talk about. things that they were passionate about, like classically boring topics, like chalk. You know what I mean? Talk.

Tell me more about chalk. That's fascinating. Like chalk that you'd use as a kid to draw on the path? On chalkboard? Yeah. Chalk. Any boring kind of thing. How do they color chalk?

Is chalk still chalk? I reckon we could have a synthetic chalk. Yeah, we could have a good conversation about chalk, really. We could have a great chat. And it turns out it didn't matter if the topic was boring or exciting or if the people talking were strangers or friends, and it didn't matter who chose the topic

every time it brought joy to them. It improved their day, it improved their mood and by the end of the small talk, they were in a better headspace. And even if it was in a name topic, like chalk, they still felt a meaningful moment

from that engagement with a stranger. Right, because you're having a human interaction and some human connection. You're being present. Yeah, it's all about being present. So you're living in the moment. Right, so the moral of this study would be, even if you don't want to make small talk or you don't find it useful, you should.

Yeah. Should we do it? Chalk today is really the pure naturally mined calcium carbonate found in the white cliffs of Dover and now it's more a synthetic alternative or a more processed material depending on its use. It's chalk synthetic. I would have thought it would have still been dust rock.

Blackboard chalk was actually dehydrated gypsum. Now if you know anything about gypsum, that's what gyp board is made of and also what you put in your garden if you want to break up the clay. It naturally breaks up the clay. I've been putting big sheets of jib in my garden and it's actually squashing the plants.

Why? You want to put it under the plants. Do you want to put it some smaller, smaller bits. Unright. Just before you go on about chalk form, because I am enthralled and this is improving my mood. Is that? Tips from researchers on how to just get in with the small talk

and not avoid it anymore. Okay. Just start. Don't worry about being boring. Just go for it. Just start talking. Ask open-ended questions. in the middle of your small engagement

and find any kind of shared experience no matter how small. So Vaughan, if you were to continue talking about chalk, Fletch came in just then very naturally. I've got some chipboard and I've been putting that into the garden, the natural garden. That was a joy.

That brought me joy that. And then I said, oh, you don't want to do it that way and now we're talking. And now we're off and we're talking. We've had a nice engagement where to leave. And our lives are enriched by this nice being present in the moment with another human. I've got other chalk stories.

I think I'm done with a math teacher who refused to move to a white board he kept using a chalkboard and it had chalk in his pocket and then it hits under his nose and he'd get a little white Hitler mustache. Oh, that was pretty funny. Also like just move with the Times dude. Yeah, dude, it did not want it. Do you know what I love is chalk art? You know, when you see those artists had to do that amazing chalk stuff.

Yes, and you think it's a big hole in the footpath but it's not, they've just drawn it. And they've got so much time into it and then a shower of rain comes through. Gone. I've had it's so much fun with you guys. Yeah, see. Embrace the small talk. ZM. Oh, I'm busting for a wheeze after that podcast.

I'll tell you. What? It's a podcast. You are allowed to listen to a while you're weeks. There's no rules on when and where you're allowed to listen to a podcast. It just says here, I'm busting for a wheeze. I read it, okay? I read it.

Give us a review. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.