ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 16th August 2023

Episode Date: August 15, 2023

Silly Little Poll!  Top 6: 80 Hour Weeks   Vaughan's Truck Trouble  Hayley's Burn  Girl Math!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Flesh, Fawn and Hayley Big Pod. Treat yourself to McCafe coffee with my Macca's rewards. Good morning, welcome to the show Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. Two minutes past six. And that just shows you, get out of Palmerston North, great things await. Hey. You know.

Hey. Get out of dirty old Palmy, the world is your oyster. I love Palmy. The Spanish footy team first to make the final. The final's being played in Australia though,. The world is your oyster. I love Palmy. The Spanish footy team first to make the final. The final's been played in Australia, though, right? It is, yeah.

Oh, lame. I know. We get all these games and then they go to Aussie for the giant big stadiums. Yeah, mind you, that Matilda's game was the most watched

sports game since... Of the 20th century? 21st century? What one are we in? 21st. 21st, yeah. Some phenomenal. So, it'll be a final between Spain and whoever

wins between England and Australia. If this was like any other sport, I'd want England to win, but... Yeah, what do you want? I'd want Australia to win because it'll be a home final. Yeah, that'd be great. I mean, I wanted New Zealand to win, you know, but... Your hopes were high, but a little misguided.

Thank you. Coming up on the show today, the first Taylor Swift song is coming up at 8 o'clock. The song that you've got to jot down or remember, along with the one at midday. How do you remember it? Mega Memory. With your Mega Memory.

Or Tony Robbins' Mega Memory. Or your phone notes. Yeah, or phone notes. And that song at four o'clock for another double pass. To Taylor Swift at her sold-out Sydney show. Coming up on the show, the top six. Yes, Sam Uffendell. You'll remember him.

Embattled National MP who beat the shit out of somebody at high school and then apparently was a he was reformed wasn't he? A scale more than a rat bag at university but yeah claims to be reformed if I was him I just would have kept my mouth shut this election but last week he said

hey I help my wife out once a month by doing the grocery shop what a hero. What a man. What a hero. It's beautiful to see feminism alive in Parliament. Two ticks blue for this man.

And then he said, I'm not sexist. I just work an 80-hour week. And everyone was like, oh, what a hero. To find the time to do the groceries just once a month. If you're working an 80-hour week, to find the time to do anything. Yeah. Anything. Oh, you're an incredible man.

Well, the top six today is the top six things your mates that claim to work 80 hours a week are actually doing when they're at work. So much. We all know these people. Sorry if I'm a bit away with it this week in an 80-hour week. No, you didn't. No, you didn't. You definitely didn't.

You worked for 80 hours, did you? Yeah. No, you didn't. Yeah, you didn't. No. No, you didn't. Simply not possible. You definitely didn't.

Did you see there's a guy who says he can put 14 extra days into his week? Does he sleep? Into his week? Yeah. I mean, that's just terrible maths. There's only seven to start with. Yeah, I know. Well, he's rocking 21.

He's getting three days out of one day. Too much. He's over-juiced in the day. Live your life. Next on the show. God, talking about hard work, Margot Robbie in Barbie. I'm going to tell you how much money Margot Robbie is going to make from the Barbie movie. Is it more than tonight's like 37 mil in lotto?

Yeah, it's a little bit more. Yeah, because it's US as well, isn't it? Yeah. Play. ZDM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Holy shibollies. Variety magazine has revealed the number of dollars that Margot Robbie is going to take home for Barbie.

Now. So she didn't just get an upfront payment. She gets a residual? Like she gets a cut of the take? She gets a producer's cut and an actor's cut and a residual. Okay. So she...

Barbie has earned about 500... So like close to $900 million at the North American box office alone since it opened. Wow. More than that. A little bit on the nose for those people who are always like go woke, go broke.

Because you would say this is quite a woke movie. It is. Go woke, go broke. Far from broke. Go woke, go broke all the records and made yourself quite rich. Yeah. And then the international box office, even more than that. We've contributed even as a country.

Well, what was the start of the week was $1. something billion worldwide. Yep. At the box office. Yep. And so Margot Robbie, it has been revealed, is going to take home herself $83 million. And that's just at the moment, right?

That's just right now. That's just it. That's not even like when it starts streaming. Merch keeps going. It's probably going to be at the movies for months. Her cut of the DVDs and the Blu-rays. All of the DVDs. The VHSs.

Yeah, absolutely. And also you just said American box office. There's the rest of the world where it's also doing quite well. Yeah. So that's $83 million. She's never going to have to work again. $83 million. That's not how it works.

They quite like working, these people, as it turns out. I mean, good for her. I mean, don't get me wrong. I agree. You wouldn't work. Absolutely not. I'd love to know the breakdown because Greta Gerwig's going to get a good cut as well. Right.

Ryan Gosling, I'd love to know what he's getting paid. I feel like Margot Robbie's performance in it is awesome and it's like kind of been overshadowed somewhat by Ryan Gosling, right, because he's the comedy role of it. But, man, she does a good performance. So much money. I mean, I've done good performances. I don't know if you saw me in Golden Boy season one and two

before it was cancelled. I mean, I didn't make $83 million. Yeah, what did you make for that? I thought you must have. Oh, you know, a decent New Zealand fee. Yeah. Residuals, they're gone. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley, silly little pose, silly little pose. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pose We're talking signs. We're talking signs at sports events and concerts. We're talking those signs people make and they tile them up and they block your view. Love them or hate them? Was that guy, what was it, a week or two ago had that sign that everybody thought was a little bit creepy? What was it?

It's just something about a player. Oh, like hitting on a player. Yeah, but yuck. But how is he going to let Harry Styles know, you know, that he saved your life?

Yeah, that you want to get engaged to the show. Engage, yeah, yeah. That's prearranged, are they?

Well, let me sing this song with you. Yeah, I can drum. Hey, Foo Fighters, I know,

I can play this song with you. Yeah, I know the drums. Yeah, yeah. I'm drumming part to Everlong.

So this was at the Dunedin football fan's sign was labelled creepy and perverted by international media. It was one of the Swiss players, Alicia Lehman. And it said, Alicia Lehman, sign my belly so I can be seen on telly. Oh, I was expecting worse. Oh, that's quite fun. God, have people seen what I get in my DMs? Yeah. It was 17 minutes past seven and someone asked if Hayley could use their face as a seat.

Yeah, I know. Oh, it's too early in the morning. It's too early in the morning. It's too early for that kind of malarkey. That's a mid-afternoon situation. That's an afternoon activity. Post-shower. I do love a sign at like a sporting game.

A good play on the players' names. The Warriors games have some great signs, but the minute they're blocking somebody else's view, it's a no-no. I don't want to be at a concert and someone's got a giant sign. You've got to be in the front row right and you hang it down. So they can see it over the front.

Cover some of those sponsors paying a small fortune to have their brand exposed at sports games. Can we just pause to up the waz? If we just pause to up the waz? If we could just up the waz. Up the waz. We had a huge pro and I came against the Sea Eagles. Sold out.

Sold out already. Is it? At Go Media, Mount Smart, Ericsson, Motorola, B300. I'm still calling it Ericsson Stadium. Ericsson Stadium. I like to call it Carlaw Park, even though it is absolutely not Carlaw Park whatsoever. That doesn't exist anymore. It hasn't existed for a long, long time.

But it was the spiritual home of New Zealand Rugby League. Up the waz. Signs at sporting games and concerts. 17% of people love them. 83% of people say, no, you're blocking my view. Wow. Okay, so if you're taking a sign to an event, the vast majority of people

do not want you to be in their way. Alan, whose Instagram name is Alan and then a dinosaur, which I like. I like to see a dinosaur emoji in there. Herbivore dinosaur by the looks of things too. Yeah, good. No one ever interacts with him. It just ruins it for everyone. It's okay if it's a small one and held somewhere, not in the eyeline of anyone.

Or a small one, what, like a little A4 on the chest? Something that can be held in front of you that's your seat width, right? And you can roll it up. Yep. Good to have a roll up. Chris said your homemade signs look shit, block views and make you look like a dum-dum. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Chris is not holding back with that.

Chris, absolutely not. Far apart. Claire said, I said I love them because I'm a hermit and never actually at a concert and sporting game, so it's funny to me to A, notice the people who are frowning behind them. And B, see whatever stupid shit someone decided to write on a sign. Yeah. Some of them are funny, though. Some of them are funny, yeah.

It's good to see a kid with a sign. That means they've put in a bit of arts and crafts. Unless they're with the Whisperer Baptist Church. Yeah, those signs aren't. God hates the wars, excuse me. I those signs are. God hates the Waz. Excuse me? I beg your pardon. God loves the Waz.

That's how we've got so far through this fantastic season. I think Waz are going to hell. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's one as well. Not the Waz. Leah says, At Luke Combs, I was sitting next to a little girl

and her sign said, I skipped school in Australia to be here. What? Well, she's going to grow up stupid. Yeah. It was an important lesson she learnt that she missed. Yeah. That's the day they were learning how to do numbers.

She was at Luke Combs. She probably already had a feral mullet too. Big feral mullet energy at that show. Livs Deakin says, only okay for artists that actually read or react to their signs, like Harry Styles, and can be put up between songs and only when he will actually see them. So Liv's has a very specific set of rules for taking a sign. Janet says, I paid to see the concert, not you.

And whatever you're advertising. Not your giant sign or flag. Wow. Flags at festivals overseas, like the Aussies. Oh, giant flags. Or the Kiwis. Yeah. Remember that guy that used to go to the cricket

and he'd stand right on the boundary and he'd wave the flag. Not only distracting for the players but if you were behind and you'd just get a flag waved in your face.

Although there was a Warriors flag at Zagat which is happening at the moment in Budapest. I mean it's very important that Budapest is up the wires. Everyone is up the wires

at the moment. Just because you're at a festival doesn't mean you're not upping the wires. Absolutely up the wires. Alicia said, I said no. I don't mind the bit of sporting event if they're out of the way

and only pulled out if the camera comes on you because the Warriors signs are A+. So Alicia there, she's up the whas. She's up the whas. And that's why she's listening to our show because she knows that we're up the whas. Huge. Definitely not on the bandwagon.

Definitely been, you know, day one. I've been up the whas since the day I was born. Day one. Day one whas fans. Have you been to a game? What games have I missed? Is more the question there, Fletch. All of them? All of them? No, only a few.

621 next on the show. A medical myth that I think a lot of us would have believed has been debunked. This is also an episode of Friends. Everything is an episode of Friends. Everything is an episode of Friends. Everything is an episode of Friends. I read an article and then I've continued to do my own research.

Oh, okay. Both of which I will present to the listeners now. Okay. Now, we've all seen the episode of Friends. It's called The One with the Jellyfish. And Monica Monica Monica? Yeah Gets stung

Yep By a jellyfish And then Is this when they're away at the Bahamas Where Ross is doing the presentation Yeah and Monica gets braids Well the braids because the humidity is affecting her hair But that's problematic

And then she's playing table tennis And her beads are like Ching ching ching ching ch, God, it's a good show. Say what you will about it. They covered a lot in the little story arc. Yeah, good. You can see why TVNZ repeat that. Oh, every day, all day, three in a row, over and over.

They covered a lot other than the lives of anyone with any kind of diversity. But you know what I mean. Yeah, sure. It was a good show. And then I think it's Joey who ends up peeing on it, and maybe Chandler pees on it. Maybe everyone pees on it, I think.

Okay. Everyone pees on it. And I feel like I always thought that this was a thing, right, that you pee on a jellyfish stain? I'll give you that episode. I will give you $20 if you can tell me what year it originally aired. $97. Okay, I owe you $10.

$20. I'm so right. What was it? Yep. 25th Okay, you can. Really? I was so right. What was that? Yep. 25th of September, 1997. I thought it was one of the later episodes. I did too.

I thought it was like early 2000s. Because when did Friends start in 96? 94? Oh, 94, right. Okay, so it was a later episode,

right? Yeah. Oh, God. Wow. It ran from, yeah, 94 to 2004.

Wow. Well, apparently that whole episode has really, like, driven home this idea that when you pee on a jellyfish sting, it makes it hurt less and, you know, help the situation. Because is it, are there beaches in Australia where they just have bottles of vinegar? Yeah.

Does this vinegar help? Yeah. So there's a paramedic who shared being, like, how many times he's been called to the beach and they've said, like, we peed on it and it's not getting any better. And he's like, yeah, you've probably made it a bit worse. Is this a paramedic who shared being like how many times he's been called to the beach and they've said like we peed on it and it's not getting any better. And he's like, yeah, you've probably made it a bit worse. Is this a paramedic in Australia? Yeah.

Right, okay. And he was like because of the ammonia in your urine, it can actually, one, it's definitely not going to help. It's not going to do anything. Right. Or it could make it worse by adding ammonia to the sting. Oh. Which will make it hurt.

Especially because I reckon most of my friends, like 95% of my friends would have bad wheeze. Yeah, dry. They don't drink enough water. They don't drink enough water. Nah, it'll be amber. Drink too much booze. Amber tone, yeah.

It'll be acidic. No offence to my friends. I don't need their wheeze. I don't want your Prosecco wheeze. I don't want your Prosecco Aperol wheeze. No. So he shared that for him, the best way to deal with the pain of it is hot water.

Not like boiling. No. Like tap hot water. You make it better by peeling off the skin. No, no, no. Just like warm to hot water, like a nice hot shower. Okay. Put it under there.

But then I did my own research and I googled about what you should do. Definitely not wheeze. It can worsen it. But you've got to like remove the barbs or the tentacles if there's any sort of left on it. Oh Jesus. Because it can put like when it hits you, it can actually leave almost like a bee sting. Yeah.

Leave the barbs in the leg. And if you were to aggravate it, those barbs could keep releasing the venom that's actually irritating it. So get that gone with your tweezers and then your vinegar. White or malt or apple cider.

Apple cider, really. It's the best for everything. Do you put malt? No, you never put malt. Imagine trying to get out a stain and be like, I'm pretty sure it's vinegar. You're putting malt vinegar on a stain. I'm going to make it way worse. Surely white. White or apple cider. Hot bath or a hot shower for 20 minutes

and then vinegar. But it's like, no wheeze. And then, and we didn't need to ring Dr. Shawnee for this, resident doctor, a bit of hydrocortisone will clear it right up. Of course it will. That other bit of hydrocortisone. But it's like a mosquito bite, right? You do the hot teaspoon trick. Yeah, well I've got one at clear it right up. Of course it will. Yep. That other bit of hydrocortisone. But it's like a mosquito bite, right? You do the hot teaspoon trick.

Yeah. Well, I've got one at my ankle right now that I'm itching. Well, get a hot teaspoon and get it as hot as you can handle it and then push the teaspoon on it. And then it'll go away. Yeah. Something about the heat. Oh, it's really itchy.

Or you do that thing where you do the hard cross with your nail on it. Oh, yes. You do that. You push your nail into a mosquito bite as hard as you can and then turn it 90 degrees and push it again so it looks like a little... Screwdriver. Screwdriver.

Yeah, right. I'm just going to itch my own all show and complain about it throughout. Yeah. That's my plan. Take the top layer of skin off. Yeah. Get a little bit of an infection.

Get onto my fingernails, my dirty fingernails get that infected. Yeah, your fingernails in there. I'll be dealing with this for the next month, I reckon. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. From the self-driving ZM think tank, this is the top six. Sam Orphan Dell, what's a great way, in battle, national MP? Every time he opens his mouth, he puts his foot in straight in it.

He's been in the news a bit, hasn't he? Yeah. He has. For his antics at high school, for his antics at university, for saying that he goes shopping for his wife. For his antics at high school, for his antics at university, for saying that he goes shopping for his wife once a month. Once a month.

To lighten the load, which is incredible. Apparently even she ripped into him about that. And then he said, I'm not sexist. I work 80 hours a week. Now don't say 80 hours

because that's ridiculous. He said 80 odd hours, indicating 80 plus. Yeah. So, I mean, the typical work week if you're a 9-to-5-er is 40 hours. 40 hours. So you're saying he's doing double that of a 9-to-5-er. Correct.

If he is working five days a week, he's working a 16-hour day. If he is working seven days a week, he's working nearly a 12-hour day every day. Yeah. Now, we had a dairy farmer message in, and I understand this is a very busy time of the year for dairy farmers. Yes.

Carving. So you've got carving, you've got the milking, you've got, you know... What are they carving? They're carving the cows. Like a beautiful marae, you know, like an ancestry. Calving. L, not a R.

I was like, why are the farmers carving? They're calving. Calving cows. I'd love a bowl. How many hours would they be doing? So this is... I'm a dairy farmer the average week

is around 70 hours this time of the year 6 in the morning from 4am 4 hours in the afternoon from 2.30pm and I didn't include night checking

on the calving cows if there's something yeah see that's classic hard work but that is 70 hours a week and that is and it's

this time of the year where it's it's a very you know intense time of the year but he's a very intense time of the year. He's claiming he's working that many hours year round. As a backbencher. As a backbencher.

In a safe national seat. Now, we all, very safe national seat. Like, you don't have to do anything? No. Turn up to the opening of a new Briscoe's once a year. Yeah. I don't know. And don't pronounce Tauranga correctly.

And you're fine. Don't you dare. You're doing the't know. And don't pronounce Tauranga correctly, and you're fine. Don't you dare. You're doing the job. Don't you dare pronounce it wrongly. You'll scare away the white people. It's Tauranga. It's Tauranga. Tauranga. Tauranga.

Like a towel, and you're wringing it out. We've all got these friends that love to say how much they're working. Oh, God. It's horrible. It's like, I know we don't work on air a lot. No. And barely behind the scenes. we don't work on air a lot. No. And barely behind the scenes. Barely behind the scenes.

Always on. I'm pulling an 80-hour. Always on. Always on. But those people that say they work 80 hours a week, it's ridiculous. It's too much. Don't say that. Top six things your mates that claim to work 80 hours a week are actually doing at work.

Number six on the list. Hour-long turds. At least. At least turning for an hour. You can get hemorrhoids being on the toilet that long-long turds. At least. At least turds for an hour. You can get hemorrhoids being on the toilet that long.

They're watching an episode though, you know? Yeah. Absolutely. Which takes us on to number five. Five? You've just done one.

Numbers have not been your forte. Well, I'm switching. I'm going to put number four in at number five. So taking us on to number five. Avoiding their home life and watching a lot of streaming services on the company Wi-Fi.

Oh, like you at the gym. Exactly. For any reason, you're the fittest you've been in years. Avoiding going home. And there's so much content to watch on streaming services. But they're saying it's work because they're in the build work. Physically, they're not there mentally. Number four on the list of the top six things,

your mates that claim to work 80 hours a week are actually doing at work. All their life admin on another tab that they alt tab out of if their supervisor walks past. That's what I do. You get a lot done in the morning. This whole radio show, I'm writing other things. Writing other bits, paying bills.

Paying bills. Looking at paint samples. Shopping. Light shades. Yep. Number three on the list of the top six things your mates that claim to work 80 hours a week are actually doing at work. Doom scrolling for hours at a time.

Yeah. Just get an Instagram hole or a TikTok hole. Before they're at work, so it's still work. At work. Yeah. So it's work. Number two on the list of the top six things your mates that claim to work 80 hours a week are actually doing at work

are selling heaps of stuff on Trade Me. Oh, yeah. Decluttering. Yeah, they're decluttering their life and using the companies, probably also posting it

from work. Yeah. Probably if there's a postage, they'll get them to pay for postage and then they'll just use the work postage. It's called a classic double dip.

Yeah, God, I miss the days where the courier bags are just sitting in a big pile. I miss the days of no questions's called a classic double dip. Yeah, God, I miss the days where the courier bags were just sitting in a big pile. I miss the days of no questions asked on a courier bag. You'd charge them,

you know, full price on Trade Me, but work would pay. Oh, this, not current workplaces, this is previous. Am I set your limitations? I believe you're out.

You're out, baby. Nine years gone. Or can MediaWorks come after me for unpaid... For some jiffy bags? Yeah, for... For some bubble wrap jiffy bags? For some bubble wrap jiffy bags.

And a courier sticker. I think their main problem would be with Betty. Betty was handing those out. No questions asked. It's for a list on Betty. It's on her. Okay. She didn't care. And number one on the list of the top six things

your mates that claim to work 80 hours a week are actually doing at work. They've definitely played with themselves. Oh, absolutely. In that 80 hours, I'm definitely going to call my wife. If you're at work 16 hours've definitely played with themselves. Oh, absolutely. 100%. If you're at work 16 hours a day, are you sleeping? You've got to.

And it's very distracting. You've got to get rid of it immediately. Absolutely. Get rid of it immediately. That is today's top six. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. So yesterday,

I got home from work. Was in the bath. From your 80 hour work week. From yesterday, I got home from work, was in the bath. From your 80-hour work week. From my 80-hour work week. I'd just done the grocery shop for my wife. For the first time in a month. For the first time in a month because of my 80-hour work week. And I do thank you both for your applause.

I walked into the house. I unloaded the groceries, put them away. I walked into the lounge. I said, up the waz. And then, of course, you've got to. To my wife. And she replied, up the waz. And then I said, I'm just going to go to the bathroom.

So I went to the bathroom. Now, I was sitting there on my phone. Oh, great. Good fun, eh? Doing poopies. Yeah, man. When I heard three loud noises, obviously joined, but also separate. Do it with your mouth.

It's hard to. The the closest thing you know when talking to your microphone please you know where is it where was i talking about the three i was just hanging out i was giving people a little bit of spatial so that i would say you know when a truck with a load on hits an unexpected bump and the whole thing goes... Yeah. That, way louder, and three of them with, like, a little tiny bit in between. Like it's bouncing. And I said to Sade, the hell was that?

I yelled out. It's kind of a meteor hitting the ground, bouncing. Because meteors bounce for sure. They do, yeah. It sounded like... Except maybe a meteor, I would imagine, would be more like a singular sort of a... Punch, yeah. This had a lot of moving parts to. They do, yeah. It sounded like... Except maybe a meteor I would imagine would be more like a singular sort of a punch. This had a lot of moving parts to it.

Right, okay. Plane crash. Yeah. Went through my mind. A light plane crash. A light plane crash. Yeah. But close.

Okay. So then I yelled out, what the hell was that? And then Sade's like, I don't know, what was it? I was like, unsure. So then I finished my business and I went out and I was like,

that was loud. And she was like, yeah. And then I went out and I fed the chooks. Now that is not a euphemism. I actually went out and fed the chooks. You fed the chooks. Put the goats on the lawn. It's too wet to mow the lawn, so the goats are eating all the lawn grass.

Is goats on the lawn a euphemism? Goats on the lawn is not a euphemism. Then I went out and I fed the cows some hay. Also not a euphemism. Right. See a truck on the side of the road. He's taking a truckload of roof framing somewhere. See a truck on the side of the road. He's taking a truckload of roof framing somewhere. Yeah.

Stop on the side of the road. I was like, that's weird. Someone around here putting a new roof on. Yeah. And then I was like, what's that beside him? Is that a truck on its side? And it was. And that's what made the noise.

A big truck that comes and picks up, you know, like a skip worth of stuff from a construction site. Yeah. Was coming down the road and when the front tyre got off the road, we've got quite steep ditches. I'm not bragging, but we've got a steep road ditch. Yeah, his ditch is so much steeper than my ditch is.

I don't want to come across braggalicious about the steepness of my ditch. Front left wheel went in, overcorrection. Detective Smith was straight on the scene for his analysis as a serious crash unit investigator. Front left in, overcorrection, both back tires then went into the steep ditch. Skitty. The minute they came out, it flipped the truck around and flipped it.

Oh, wow. It actually rolled. So the three sounds were onto the side, onto the roof, onto the next side. Oh, my God. Was this guy okay? So I get out there. Oh, girl, we don't know. Guy.

Oh, okay. The guy is out there. The image was a guy. Yeah, the guy's out there. Norma's out there. Norma from next door. Yeah. Lovely Norma.

She loves nosy. Nosy Norma. She said, this is exciting times. I said, how the hell did this happen? And the guy was like, I couldn't tell you

because he was obviously in shock. Yeah, right. Was he okay? Yeah, he was all right. He was like holding I couldn't tell you. Because he was obviously in shock. Yeah, right. Was he okay? Yeah, he was all right. He was like holding his ribs. He might have had a broken or a fracture in the ribs. So it's like a big trunk.

Dude, it was what? Wow. I was one of those people, though, that like just hung around the whole, watched these massive tow trucks came. I was like, pull it over. Because I was expecting the tow truck to just pull it over. You were telling the tow truck driver what to do. No, no, no. I was just saying it to myself.

But I was expecting them to pull it over so it went and fell and it went back on its tyres. But it didn't. They like controlled it. Boring, eh? They controlled it with two tow trucks and like slowly put it back on its wheels and towed it. Took all the rubbish. But there's a huge scar on Norma's berm. Wow.

Who's coming to fix Norma's berm? I don't know. Norma's going to have to get in touch with the council. Someone's going to have to scar on Norma's berm. Wow. Who's coming to fix Norma's berm? I don't know. Norma's going to have to get in touch with the council. Someone's going to have to come and reseat her berm and frame it out. Well, don't talk about it because you'll end up having to do it. I actually wouldn't mind giving it a go. All right. But, yeah, truck flip.

Drama. That's insane. Dude, it just, yeah, the truck was also brand new because I ran the car, I ran the plates through a car jam. Oh, you're so annoying. You're so nosy. 2023 was a 2023 truck. And then the health and safety from the company arrived,

asked if I witnessed that. And I said, no, but here's my theory. Oh, my God. You are such a nosy prick. And then I said, is that truck brand new? And she said, yeah, brand new on the road. I was like, oh, good stuff. Well, thank God you were there.

Thank God everybody's okay. Thank God you were there. Thank God I was there. Thanks, guys. Yeah, thank God I was there. Well, they might not have known what to do. So they would have not, the tow truck driver wouldn't have had a clue how to get that thing up. The fire service wouldn't have had a bloody clue how to fix it.

They wouldn't have known who's the who's. Yeah. They asked me, the fire service did ask me if If anything you know Dangerous was in the truck Right I said I wouldn't know But I'm more than happy to look Oh my god Wow

Stop it It was so embarrassing Real noisy This might be a moment of awakening I think things are about To get a bit deep here Do you know We said this yesterday

Like sometimes off air We talk Shit Man we talk funny We talk lewd And sometimes we talk funny. We talk lewd. And sometimes we talk deep. Yeah. We were just doing this almost separate from what you're about to say. Yeah, but

related. Yeah. Because there's been a study 19% of employees felt their jobs were socially useless and what are called bullshit jobs. Where you literally are adding nothing to society. You're just somewhere for 40 hours a week.

I mean, it's interesting, like, because I've always thought this, and like me and Aaron think it's sometimes, you know, we work in entertainment and whatnot. And then we look at his brother who is a, what's the baby doctor? Not the foot. Pediatrician.

Pediatrician. Saving babies' lives is his day. And sometimes you can look at your own thing and be like, man, what am I doing? But then you can break it down and go, well, I'm providing entertainment and giving someone an escape from their day and making people laugh and that makes them feel good

and that makes me feel good. Didn't save any babies' lives, but maybe made someone a bit happier. Maybe it did save a baby's life, though. Have you heard of the butterfly effect? Yeah, yeah. She laughed, which paused the day, which then delayed the car,

which then delayed the thing. The baby survived. The baby survived, yeah. I often will do that. I'll just run a few scenarios in my head to make me feel better about it. So these are jobs that add nothing to society and nothing to this person's spiritual accomplishment

where at the end of the day you can be like that was nice i feel good i helped or i did or i supported or i provided uh they're a byproduct of what is called managerial feudalism and increased financialization of the economy where it's like somebody earns a stack of money and they put such little value on a task that they hire a person to do the tasks that mean nothing, that need to be done, and that is the person who's like, my job means nothing and I have no purpose. So how many people feel like they have this? 19%, so one in five.

One in five people have a job that they believe is adding little to nothing to society and it wouldn't matter if their job didn't exist. But the wheels of society... Now, don't say that out loud because they will straight up make you redundant. But it has to... Like, it all has to... Like, the wheels have to keep turning.

Someone's got to be doing those sort of jobs, right? At the end of the day, you're like, well, it's the money, isn't it? It's why any of us work. And the money provides you with time and family. Your family and your friends. Do you have to seek it outside of work? Yeah. You'd probably, yeah, definitely.

You'd have to seek a little bit of societal, like do charity work or volunteering or, but you're already at work, presumably sitting in front of a computer, because that's the other thing, most of these jobs are like desk-bound jobs. Yeah. People who are out and about and moving with their job generally feel like they

are contributing to society. Yeah. Or doing something that and about and moving with their job generally feel like they are contributing to society. Yeah. Or doing something that's helping people. Administrative assistants were like the main one. Right. What am I actually doing? What's the purpose of this job? That's quite, yeah, God, I don't know.

Did we need this this early when everyone's heading to work? Just like, now they're questioning. Turn around, go home. Now they're questioning. And now the whole industry's going to collapse because they listen to Fletchbourne and Hayley in the morning and realise that it's all meaningless and now they're going to go off and do charity work instead.

We just sparked a revolution. Oh my God. Didn't we? Yeah, we've sparked, this has been a powder keg for a few years now. It's just been waiting for it. But I think, like you say, that's what people outside of their jobs have things like they might do charities or

help out in the community and that gives them that sense. Well yeah, look after their kids and provide for their family. I'm sure, because I feel like any job I've ever done, and I'm lucky that I work in a way that my passion is to entertain people and I get to do that as a job. But any

job I've done, be it big or small, I've always been able to like try to find a way to make it meaningful in your head. Even if it's just for yourself. Yeah. I'm sure you could do that with any job. Be like, well, I play this part in this machine and that actually helps people and da-da-da-da.

And then for that, I get it. Yeah, like you said, exchange money. What about when you were the spokesperson for bread? See, for me, that was the most meaningful trial. It's important that people ate folic acid. I was going to say, were they hucking a bit of folic acid in their bread, were they? They're not hucking folic acid. No, you've got to huck folic acid in your bread.

It's a positive. Everyone's doing it now. I was doing that, aren't we? Everyone's doing that now. Yeah, but I was shining a light on the farmers that provide the bread that feeds the bellies of New Zealanders. Yeah, but you're not that farmer, are you? This is my point. Yeah, but I'm the lens through which I'm shining the light.

Right. Now, that's a very important role. Okay. You know? I'm bringing an awareness to the people that work so hard to grow the seed. You're eating a loaf of bread and saying, what a nice sandwich. You're not even thinking, what a nice seed. And she did it for free.

Oh, no no I got paid oh did you get paid oh 100% oh shit quite well pretty better than the farmers with the current season

I've been having absolutely yeah yesterday I'll go for a brioche sorry the producers are just at the cafe across the road Yesterday

It was a big day at the house And we've got guttering coming Now that doesn't sound exciting for many people But boy oh boy It's exciting for us I like a bit of guttering chat Because I've got to get some of that stuff over the guttering To stop the guttering filling up with this shit that comes off the trees

Yeah right But here's my predicament. Yeah. The trees they don't drop a leaf, they drop like a tiny spear. Like a little tiny... Now that could probably fit through the gaps. I've got an idea. Put a tent over your house.

Got ya. Like a whole dome. Like a massive marquee. A massive marquee, yeah. You're welcome. He's got your beer. That's a great idea. Perfect, yeah. That's a great idea. How much do those cost over a whole house? Well, they get the one from the warehouse.

Versus just getting some stuff for the gutters. No, just get a couple of wedding warehouse ones. Yeah. And sew them all together. Easy. Put some extenders on the legs. Yep, you're welcome. Yeah.

Because it won't be tall enough. Tie them down for the wind. Yeah, I was going to say, you've got wind to contend with. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we're getting guttering next week, and so we've got to fix up all the barge boards where the guttering goes, right? Like, and it's all 145 years old,

so it's not in great shape. So we're up there yesterday and the first step was cleaning it. And I've used this stuff before. It's like the 30-second spray and walk away stuff. You should do that. Those are two different products. 30-second stuff. 30 seconds is one company, spray and walk away stuff. You should do the ad. Those are two different products. 30 second stuff.

30 seconds is one company, spray and walk away. And spray and walk away is another one. Oh my God, I'm so sorry. And wet and forget's a different guy. No, I did 30 seconds. Okay, right. Yeah. Was it actually 30 seconds?

Wait, is 30 seconds spray and walk away guy? 30 seconds go house cleaner. Because I know wet and forget and wet and forget are 30 seconds are different companies. I'm just googling. I'm only getting 30 seconds, go house cleaner. Because I know, we didn't forget in 30 seconds in different companies, but now I feel like... I'm just googling, I'm only getting 30 seconds to Mars.

Are they still around? It's Jared Leto. They'll never leave my heart. Do you know Jared Leto makes the most cringe TikToks? Yeah, he does. He's part of like cringe love. Okay, so 30 seconds is spray and walk away.

30 seconds is spray and walk away, but different to wet and forget. Thank you. I apologise. No, that's okay, that's okay. So we use the house cleaner concentrate and you have to like make it up yourself. So I measured it. I emptied a bottle of...

Do you have to make a mixture? A window cleaner. Yeah, like a witch. Back to my witch days. Put the window cleaner in another bottle because I wanted the squeegee. Oh, yeah. Because we're up... Well, Aaron's up on the roof.

And so, you know, it needed easy access. Just on his tiptoes, that's how tall he is. Yeah he's very tall, he just reaches boop and then I mixed up this mix and I got all this stuff, I was sort of gophering you know I was sort of like fetching and carrying for Aaron while he was sort of perching on this roof and then he was doing the spraying and

stuff and then I just started to feel this like epic burning through my left nostril, and then my eye was like weeping. Oh, my God. Were you wearing safety gear? Absolutely not.

I don't have time for that. Okay. It's too late, honestly. The amount of work we've done already without a mask is too late. The lungs are coated. Once they got rid of the asbestos. Yeah, totally. We sanded it off.

To hell with it. We sanded off the asbestos. Anyway, I started to feel this burn, and I was like, oh, my God. And I was saying to Aaron, do I have a bleeding nose? It felt like, you know, that feeling when you get a bleeding nose, that big, like, sour stinging running. Yeah. And I could not put my finger on what had happened.

And then I was like, oh, and I sniffed my fingers, and they absolutely behave. Behave. I'm not saying anything. Behave. I'm not saying anything. I'm just saying it was a very unusual choice of words. I sniffed my fingers and they absolutely stunk of bleach. Excuse me, we've got to sequence that quite a little bit.

Can you turn your mics off, please, both of you? Okay, I'm back. Hi, everyone, I'm Solo. I sniffed my fingers. Yeah. And they smell of bleach, which is one of the key ingredients, hydrogen peroxide, right?

Of the walk away, the 30 seconds. Of the 30 seconds walk away. Yeah, you're basically just bleaching your house and then you wipe it off. Right. And I realised that I had been, when I'd put together the concoction, my fingers had bleach on them and I didn't wash them.

Yeah. And then I've been sitting there picking my nose because I'm a big nose picker. Big nose. As you mentioned last week, you got caught on the speed camera. Speed camera. Picking your nose. That's right. Still waiting for that photo?

Still waiting for the photo. Okay. Maybe I got away with that. But yeah, I just can't. I am. I'm not even going to try to sugarcoat it. I pick my nose all day long. And I had put ammonia, like, really strong right at my nose.

Did you not notice when you were picking your nose, were you like, this smells, or were you just overcome with the smell? I liked the smell of the bleach. Oh, my God. So I was sort of like, I was almost huffing the fingers. Yeah, right. Like that, the whole time. You know when you rub your hand in your armpit and you're like, you can't stop smelling it? No, no. Am I that man, Kev? Yeah, you. Like that. The whole time. You know when you rub your hand in your armpit and you're like, you can't stop smelling it.

No, no. Am I that man, Kev? Yeah, you are. Anyway, Aaron was like, go wash it out. You've put ammonia up your nose, you grotty. Are you supposed to, is it one of those things you're supposed to splash water on? You know, every now and then they'll be like,

oh, I don't get water with it. Because you might be diluting it further. And rinsing it through. Or some things react to water. Well, I wasn't allowed to go do it in the sink. If you get metal sodium in your eye,

you don't put water in it, it'll cause an explosion. Yeah. Oh, God! Is it sodium that explodes in water? Why weren't you allowed to do it in the sink? Because we've got a nice sink

and it's the only running water in our house. Right. So he didn't want me putting ammonia near it. So I had to go down the back of the house and get the garden hose

and I turned it on and I went like and get the garden hose and I turned it on and I went like this with the garden hose and it went straight up your nose. It just blasted up the nausea and cleared it out. Good little sinus clear too.

But it sounds like you've just pushed the bad stuff further into your brain. The ammonia in the brain. Yeah, so you've kind of 30 seconds to your brain.

Is my face slipping? Yeah, 30 seconds you didn't walk away you're staying there with it. Yeah, yeah. So I've bleached my brain and my nostril cavity, all from being a grotty little girl. I'm picking my nose still.

You're doing all right, though. I'm doing okay. I feel all right. And also now it's a great excuse to get that deviated septum seen to. Do I have a deviated? No, I've got a very straight nose. No, no, no, no. But the septum's deviated from all the 30 seconds.

From all the 30 seconds I've been huffing. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Do you guys remember your first kiss? Beyond like... Like proper. Yeah, like a first make out. I think I was like 27. No.

Yeah, I think last week I met someone. For the first time. Do you remember yours? It was really special. No, not really. Sixth form after ball during Forrest Gump. Sixth form? After the after ball.

Yeah. Yeah, sixth form. So 16. Wow, okay. Yeah. Wait, during Forrest Gump, you were all horned up. Which bit were you horny? Yeah, which bit made you horny?

The one where she nods. When she's playing the guitar? Is that where you... Couldn't get it on Juno. Juno. I like Juno. Yeah. I remember mine, he had a tongue ring

and it was at my friend Maria's house in the kitchen. Did it clickety clackety on your teeth? I can't remember that much detail, but he was gross. In the kitchen? Yeah, they had... Against the server? No, no, no. There was like a kitchen and then like past the kitchen they had a dining table and like a little couch. You know, it was like a sort of living

general space. Yeah. It was like a peach leather couch. And when... Yeah. And you were on the couch? Yeah, his name was Men's. Men's. What was it sure for? No, I could not tell you. And he had a tongue piercing. A tongue ring. Wow the couch. Yeah, his name was Menz. With a Z. What was it sure for? No, I could not tell you. And he had a tongue piercing. He had a tongue ring.

Wow, okay. Yeah. Anyway, so this guy, or this couple, I guess, who have shared that their first kiss was on their wedding day. First kiss ever. When they said, you may now kiss the bride, that was the first one. Either of, that first time, either of them have kissed.

Both of them. In their entire lives. In their entire lives. In their entire lives. So you might have seen, there was like one of those like TLC, you know, shows where it was like

undateable people and he'd never kiss someone and then he was like, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. You know, it was so bad. Yeah.

This wasn't like this. It was very nice. Now, it was for religious purposes. They met. Yeah. At a church. They were 25 years old.

That's why I still haven't because I'm waiting. You're waiting for the right one. God bless you. Thank you. Now, they had never... When I said God bless you and looked in your eyes there, I think I had a heart attack. Wow.

I think I was struck down by our Lord. Satan himself. Really? What have you got going on? There's a darkness in you. There's a darkness in you. There's something that our Lord is not pleased with. I'm not sure what it could be.

You're unblessable. What is wrong with you? You're unblessable. Every time I walk into a really lovely cathedral, you know like churches overseas, they're so beautiful. I start getting a warm... Well, that's how Notre Dame burnt down. You walked in as well.

And the candles started falling. It burst into flames. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was you, wasn't it? Had to get out of there pretty quickly. Neither of them had been intimate with anyone before. Intimate even meaning kissing, not even just like sex.

Right. Intimate with themselves? Oh, not in this article. Okay. So they said, they said two weeks of dating they were like, we're not going to do

physical intimacy until they get engaged. Then they got engaged. They're like, well, we're going to get married in six months time. Let's keep going. And the way that they combat,

they said there were a lot of temptation, obviously. They're both stunning. I just watched the first kiss. It is a bit like, you know, like smack to the lips.

It's a bit mouthy, a bit teethy. So instead of that, they would never go on a date. If they were on a date alone, they'd do an activity like rock climbing or a walk

or something like that or they'd laugh. And then if they were ever going out for dinner, they'd make, you know, like a sort of a night time thing and make sure they were with friends. Imagine finding out

they're a really bad kisser on like your first kiss at the wedding. Or they've got like halitosis or something. Or their nipples weren't to your liking. Everybody's got a very specific sort of a nipple like really criteria. Do you love all nipples? I think I love all nipples. I'm a bit of a nipple snob. Are you? I'm a little bit of a nipple I think I love all nipples Do you love all nipples? I think I love all nipples

I'm a bit of a nipple snob Are you? I'm a little bit of a nipple snob Really? Really big areoles They're out It depends Okay

How about to the nubs? Oh yeah If it's relevant to the nub It's all relevant baby It's relevant to the nub Okay it's relevant Anyway Everyone was like

Wow that's quite late Wait What about my really tiny nipples? They're fine On you On me They're fine on you. On me. They're fine. But not on a hot girl, is that what you're saying?

If a hot girl had my nipples. That'd be hot. Really? The areola's the size of an old five-cent coin. It's all, I'm telling you, you've just got to do some judgment in the moment. I've never thought about the criteria, but there's probably a criteria. Right, okay. If you're happy with them,

that's all that counts. Yeah. Mine are all right. They're not great, but they're all right. A bit scarred up, I'd experiment. Anyway.

Right, okay. Anyway, so I, 26 years old, 26 and 27 respectively, this couple, for their first kiss at the wedding day, I want to know

how late was your first kiss? Mine? I don't know if there's going to be anyone that can beat that. We don't know. It's not impossible phone up. It doesn't have to try to beat it, but maybe you just waited and waited and waited for that first kiss. And I guess it becomes hard though, the

longer you wait, right? You're just like... More pressure. It's the 40-year-old virgin paradox. Yeah, yeah. Exactly. Where you just, there's so much pressure that you put on yourself. I know, for it to be good. Yeah. Because the first kiss is like that. I mean, years and years of just, you know?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. So you want to hear from people now. 0800-DARLS-IT-IN. You can call. You can text in 9696. How late was your first kiss and why? Did you wait for the wedding? Or even if you were a teenager, what were you waiting for?

How did it go? Oh, maybe you had braces. I had braces when I was Passion Boys. It was all right. I had a boyfriend. I had braces and my boyfriend had a tongue ring. Oh, God, that's a trick. I met up with a couple of people with tongue rings.

Unreal. They were all the rage, though. There was a clickety-clackety on the back of my teeth. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just didn't get into the tongue right. But we never got hooked. Okay. Because Sade had a tongue ring when we first got here.

Did you remember that? She was from Hamilton though. I'll wait a hundred times. She's from Hamilton. Oh, bless her. She's from Hamilton. We're currently asking you how late your first kiss was. Have you had a really late one?

No judgment here. No. Be it for religious purposes Or teeth purposes Or Yeah You just It just didn't happen And you had to wait a long time Why?

And what happened? I hope if you waited The person that you waited for Was worth it you know Because imagine waiting No that puts too much pressure No but that's what I'm saying Is otherwise just kind of

Get it out the way Yeah But if you've waited And you're like Gotta find the right person And then you've put all that pressure on yourself and the person that you've ended up first kissing wasn't worth the wait, that sucks.

Yeah, totally. I'm sorry that you're a bad kisser. I'm sorry about that. It's a message, isn't it? We do. My first kiss was at 21. Only because I don't like following the crowd and when all my friends got smirchy,

I decided to do the opposite and make the boys work for it. Oh, yeah, okay. 21, I want to know how it went. Like, was it any good? Because you get your, like, young teenage kisses out of the way and they're guaranteed to be bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was

30. Okay. At my first kiss and also soon after lost the plates. So it was once the ball got rolling, baby. Yeah, right. Oh, the plates, the plates. I had my first kiss at 21, came out of my emo phase, and then the boys were more interested.

Oh. Oh, no, I was the hottest when I was an emo. I've never been hotter than when I was emo. That's when she absolutely peaked. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So first, turning 27 this month, never been kissed,

never been in a relationship, having a great time. Good stuff. That's you. That's you being you. You do that. Don't read the next one. What's that? No, I won't read that one.

24 years old, still no first kiss, social anxiety is a real bitch. Yeah. I get that. And now the pressure's more. And then you put a lot of pressure on yourself, and then there's the social anxiety, and then make out with your friends. I think I patched my friends.

You know girls. I mean, girls kiss each other all the time as teenagers. Right. I think I made out with my friends before I made out with a boy. I'm 28, and I'm still waiting for my first kiss. He just ignored that. He just ignored that. He just ignored that.

I want to talk about it later. It's not a conversation I want to get too in-depth on here, but later on. What are you doing after the show? Coffee and a slice? Yeah, we can hang out. We can have a coffee and a slice. Okay.

Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Got pictures of them and they're still on Facebook. Never mind, never mind. We'll talk about it later. I'm 28 and I'm still waiting for my first kiss. My parents never approved of relationships and then I got on Facebook. Never mind, never mind. We'll talk about it later. I'm 28 and still waiting for my first kiss. My parents never approved of relationships and then I got career focused. Oh, wow. Okay.

Yeah. Now, you'll have to forgive me if I'm about to say something untoward because it is a phrase that I'm not familiar with. I was 24 when I had my first kiss with my now husband only because I was a raisin in a bowl of chocolate chips. A raisin in a bowl of chocolate chips. A raisin in a bowl of chocolate chips? What does that mean? Like not as pretty as all the chocolate chips.

Like you were picked last? Because everybody else would eat the chocolate chips and then you'd go for raisins. I mean chocolate chips are yummy. But then some people love raisins, don't they? But no one loves raisins more than they love. Is this a Gen Z saying? Can we just pop into the producer's booth?

No, they're shaking their heads. No one in there has ever heard of... Do they mean like ugly duckling? Who's the raisin in our bowl of chocolate chips? Go. Everyone say it on three. Go, go, go. One, two, three.

Bourne. No! Jared, you said something else. No one else was going to say anything. Nobody was going to say anything. No one said he was going to say anything. Oh, rat. Wow. Wow. Another, rat. Wow.

Wow. I'm not a raisin. Wow. You're not my raisin. You're not my raisin. Play it. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. I don't love cardio.

I've always been a weights girl. Running, I can't run. General fitness is quite bad. You're a big cardio boy. I prefer it. Yeah, and you're a mixed bag. You can do other stuff while you do it. Like, I just watch TV shows.

You just watch TV. And just run and just forget you're running. I wonder how... Actually, to be fair, I had seen you watch TV shows dripping sweat. I do not know how you do it. Yeah, because I... Because I get too distracted by the TV show.

Oh, I'm like a bird. My head stays still. I want to fly away. Like, my body moves and my head just stays still. I want to fly away. Like my body moves and my head just stays still. I've worked out, you know how birds... Chickens.

You know, harrier hawks, they can be like, their wings are moving and their heads are just like, that's me on the treadmill. Because when you used to tell us that you'd treadmill

and watch shows, I imagined you doing like a light plonk plod, you know, like not a sprint. Like a mum that's reading a woman's weekly on the treadmill. My favourite is because I always, my chosen cardio is the bike. And I'll always go on the bike and there's always that sit bike,

the seat bike where it's just the legs and you're like leaning back. Have you seen those? And the women are always like watching something or reading something. Or reading a book. Yeah. It's so wild. When someone's reading a magazine, you're kind of like they're flucking through, but a book, yeah, that's wild. If you get a little're kind of like, they're flucking through, but a book.

Yeah. That's wild. If you get a little bit of beta sweat, they're like, oh, God, no, I don't want that. Well, now there's a new trend. It's everywhere on TikTok. Cozy cardio. So similar to what Vaughn's doing. Like, if I'm doing cardio, I need, like, heavy metal or, like, dance music or something really

pumping. Because you're trying to get to zone two or three. I need to get in zone two. And I tell you what, I need to stay there. Yeah. You know? When I do cardio I'm in like zone five straight away. Anybody else have zone four and just like start panicking that they're on the verge

of a heart attack? Yeah, absolutely. Heartbeat 189, you're like, that's not good. So cozy cardio is like, it takes some elements of what Warn's doing, which is like maybe take off the aggressive music and put on a little TV show. Maybe you're watching a little Love Island. That's what I

was doing on the bike when I was inspired by Vaughn's TV watching. But then you set up an environment. So if you're doing it at home, you might dim the lights. You might put on a mood light. You might put on a lamp. No, the best TV shows to watch when you're doing cardio are like actions. Action shows. Like when Jack Ryan's running and you're running and you're doing cardio are like actions. Action shows.

Even Jack Ryan's running and you're running and you're like, oh, wait up, Jack. I don't know if you can just pull the blinds and dim the lights at City Fitty and put a candle on next to your cross trainer. I pull the blinds at Les Mills. I was pulling them down and like creating a nice little mood. I pull the blinds down at the gym because the reflection from outside affects the ability to see the screen, clearly.

No apologies for it. No apologies. Now, a lot of people are taking it as far as going like lighting candles and whatnot. And they're saying like when we exercise, your body's releasing chemicals like endorphins, serotonin, dopamine. What a cocktail. I'll have a dopamine cocktail, please. But if you add things like sensory things, like a nice light, maybe a little red light or something,

and a candle, and a light breeze, and some gentle music, you're increasing the level of which those hormones are being released, and it actually makes you feel better. Cardiovascularly, I don't think you're really going to be going that hard if you're sort of doing some light

lunges in the lounge. But if cardio is not your thing and it's too stressful and the stress of it all is like too much. I mean, cozy cardio is better than no cardio. Yeah, well, that's a fitness trend I'm trying to get going. No cardio. Yeah, no cardio, no gym, no was. Just brioches and martinis.

Yeah, you got it, man. Consider me a fitness influencer. It's Taylor Swift, Brendan Urie, me. That is the song you've got to remember, along with the one at midday and four. If you're the first caller through at four with Bree and Clint when they play that song, and you can name all three, you win a double pass to Taylor Swift's sold-out show in Sydney,

one of those shows. Also, everybody that wins a ticket goes in the draw to score return flights for two, all thanks to Air New Zealand's Grab-A-Seat. Yeah, we just need, someone's asked a question, I think we should address it on air. Guys, do you reckon if I win, I could bring my cat to the Eris tour? Huge Swifty. I mean, look, the tickets are yours.

No, you can't get a cat. Your cat would need quarantining on the way in. Can I sneak at him? They say, like, no umbrellas and sharp objects. They don't say no cats. They don't say no cats, do they? But you're right, they've got strict quarantine. Because you remember Johnny Depp tried to sneak his dog in, didn't he?

On his private jet. That's right. And they had to do that silly apology. That whole big kerfuffle. Yeah, so no cats. You'll have to actually find a human to take.

Oh gosh. Terrible. A human could dress you. That would be my proviso with taking a friend is they must dress as a cat. As your cat. As your cat specifically.

And wear a little collar with your cat's name on it. Knock yourself out. As a representative. Girl math. Girl math. Girl math. Girl math.

Oh, my God. I want to go to a club and hear this. Girl math. Girl math. Girl math has gone crazy. Like, the views on TikTok are insane. Yeah, I share girl math. It's everywhere at the moment. It's a lot of fun. has gone crazy. Like the views on TikTok are insane. Hmm. Yeah. I share girl math.

It's everywhere at the moment. It's a lot of fun. We're really enjoying everyone's feedback and engagement with girl math. A lot of people have been emailing us how they've girl mathed things.

Yeah. We received an incredible email. It was like two pages long. Oh, it was girl algebra. It was next level girl math. Yeah, it was unreal algebra. It was next level. Yeah, it was unreal. We're absolutely loving it. But today we have a new edition of Girl Math justifying quite a purchase made by Kelsey.

Good morning, Kelsey. Morning, guys. Now there's the tone of a woman who's dropped a lot of money. Now you, how much money have you spent and what did you buy? So I spent $699 on a Dyson Supersonic hairdryer. Jeepers, creepers. I like it. Fletch gasped before he even knew what it was.

$699. You went for a brand new car. He's like, still, that's quite a lot. Oh, my God. Still, that's quite a lot. Okay, I'm interested. for a brand new car. He's like, still, that's quite a lot. Oh, my God. Still, that's quite a lot. Okay, I'm interested. For a hairdryer. Kelsey, the reason he's gasping, and I've stayed at Fletcher's house before,

and he has... Excuse me. He's got a Cambrook. You have a Cambrook hairdryer. No, I think it's like an Anko. It's something. No, it's... What brand is the warehouse one?

Living in Co. Yeah, Living in Co. It's a Living in Co. Living in Co. It became Anko, didn't it? And that's... Oh, I don't know. No, his is so old, it's Living in Co. Living in Code. Yeah, Living in Code. It's a Living in Code foldable travel. It became and code, didn't it? Oh, I don't know. No, his is so old it's Living in Code. It's from the warehouse but I don't have any hair. It's just

a service I provide for my guests. Well, I've got very short and thin hair and it still took me about four hours to dry it using this thing. And do you know what? It was $29.99 Kelsey. I don't even need Girl Map for that because that's a good saving. I would have been better coming under the bathroom and asking you to blow on my head to get my hair dryer.

Exactly, exactly. That's the whole point, right? Right. So are you loving this purchase? It is like a game changer. Like, it is definitely worth the money. Who makes it? With the hype.

Dyson, man. They know how to blow air around and suck air around, don't they? Blowing and sucking, Dyson. That's their tagline, I believe. Now, one of the features, because I was just looking this up, I'm a girl, I've got very light hair, so I'm very prone to flyaways, and it's blonde,

so a bit of breakage. This has like a flyaway feature. It does. What does that mean? What is one of those? So the fly away is like little fluffy bits of hair that kind of stick up. These little shorties. Oh God, you've got so many, Hayley. So what does it do to that? What does it do to them?

It like smooths them down and joins them into the rest of your hair. How does it do that? I've got two kids, so I've got postpartum like baby hairs that are all growing back. I've got the fluff and like honestly, yeah, game changer. Because've got the fluff. They're all growing back. I've got the fluff. And, like, honestly, yeah, game changer. Because you know what?

Let's get going. How much, how did you spend on this? $699. Yeah. Well, round it to $700 for the sake of ease. Okay. Not exactly the sort of money one should be dropping on this sort of purchase with two new children. Yeah, they're not cheap, are they?

I don't want to guy math this. She agrees. Don't guy math. Get that stinky-ass guy math. Now, can we get the girlies on board here? don't want to guy math this. She agrees. Don't guy math. Get that stinky ass guy math. Can we get the girlies on board here? Girlies, we all know this hair dryer, don't we? Oh, incredible. Now, I'm going to say, as a girl with flyaways,

I actually, I don't have this hair dryer. I've got a cheapie. Yeah. But I spend quite a lot of money on product. I'm talking your mousses, your pastes, your gels, your hairsprays to stick down my flyaways. I would say maybe we're going to equate that to like $50 a month. Yeah, easily.

Easily on products. With the Olaplexes and stuff like that as well. With the Olaplexes to try to do the bonding, which this hairdryer already does, as you've said, Kelsey. So I reckon I would shave at least $100 off just on saving on products. $600 a year. $600 a year? $600 a year. At $50 a month.

Thank you very much, Kelsey. It's free now. It's free. Goodbye. No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm just doing the calculations here. I'm not girl math. No, I probably wouldn't spend $600 a year.

Let's say $100 on product. Shave that off. Now we're down to $600. Yeah. Which is still heavy to $600. Yeah. Which is still heavy for a hairdryer. Well, I've got another calculation for you. It's winter at the moment. It is.

It's dangerous to have wet hair. You can get very sick because you lose a lot of heat from your head. Going to bed with wet hair. Especially when it's cold. So I reckon an average doctor's appointment in New Zealand, $70. She needs to use this 10 times

and she makes $70 every time she dries her hair from that 10. Oh, my God, that's right. Kelsey, because if you get sick with a wet head, you're off to the dock. Let's play conservatively, though. One at the start of winter and one at the end. So $70 a pop, that's $140. So we started at $700.

I'm going to make you work for the skill math today, by the way. I'm not just going to roll over. He's clocking us. He's doing the paperwork. We'm going to make you work for the skill math today, by the way. I'm not just going to roll over. He's clocking us. He's doing the paperwork. We were down to $600 and then minus another $140 equals $470 remaining on this purchase. Keep going. Did you take money off for the mousse?

That was the original $100. Okay. We're getting down to, it's still quite heavy for a hairdryer. How much time would you save? How much time would you save? Again, I'm not a girl and I'm not girl-maffing here, but how much time would you save on this much time would you save? Again, I'm not a girl and I'm not girl-maffing here, but how much time would you save on this hairdryer

versus the $30 one that Fletch owns? Oh, you'd do it in half the time, wouldn't you, Kelsey? Yeah, it takes me maybe like two minutes to dry my hair now as opposed to like 40. Okay, so you save half an hour every time you do your hair. And how much do you... What do you put your hourly rate at? What's your hour worth?

Oh, well, let's say if I was going on my workouts, I'm like $50 an hour. She's a $50 an hour girl. No wonder she's got a dinosaur. That's $25 every time she does it. Beautiful. Holy hell. I mean, take a couple of hundy off there.

We're essentially getting down towards, I hate to say it, free. We're at a $200. Carwen, you've got a theory of your own. Yes, now hear me out. Girls' own. Yes. Now, hear me out. Girls' nights? Yes. Yes.

Drinks can be expensive. They can be. Now, you now own a great styling, hair styling machine that your friends will want to borrow. Yeah. And what can they do for you in reciprocate of that? Yeah. Buy you drinks.

Oh, my goodness. Get ready at my house. Oh, get ready at mine. I'll show you a couple of drinks. They're bringing around pre's. Also that. They're not turning up empty- ready at my house. I'll get ready at mine, I'll show you a couple of drinks. They're bringing around pre's. Also that. They're not turning up empty handed to your house if they're going to be using your hairdryer.

So what are you drinking? Well, let's say a bottle of Prosecco is like $18. You've got to get through a couple of those before you hit the town. I mean, each time. With $36 at least per session, that's once a week. Okay. Well, say you're going to want to 40 now. Just for my better maths. Yeah, 40. 160. Yeah, 160. Now, that's once a week. Okay. Well, say you're at 140 now. Just for my better maths.

Yeah, 40. Yeah, 160. Now, here's a wild theory. Please. Would you say, Kelsey, you've got thick hair or thin hair? Thick. What? And lots of it, yeah.

How many hairs on your head on average? Because let's break this down per strand. The average human hair is about 100,000 hairs. So that's the average human head. So I'm going to give her a 50,000 extra. Can you divide the money we've got left by 150,000, please? You're on the calculator today. Per strand of hair.

I don't know if we've got per strand of hair. We're working this down poor strand. I'm sorry, but you've got to work for it this time. How much does it cost to get a blow wave at a hair salon if you were to go in and get it? Oh, 100 bucks? Yeah. Definitely.

So you're down to $60. No, but that's only once. Every time. Kelsey, how many nights... I'm making you work for it. Kelsey, you've got kids. How many times a week... How many times a year do you think you'd have a big night out?

Oh. I mean, like, let's put it this way. I probably use the hairdryer maybe, like, three, four times a week. Plus, my husband uses it, like, every day. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. What does he use it for? Dry his hair.

So hang on. Divide that in half what you've got left. We're at $80 because two people are using it. We're at $30. And that is exactly

what Fletcher's cambric costs from the warehouse. For a cambric it's a living in co. A living in co is even worse. It's got two speeds

and it does it cool. But hang on. If she's using it three times a week that's 150 times a year. Yeah. And he's using it every day. And 150 blow waves.

Wait a second. 150 blow waves. What do we say it was? 100 bucks. Oh, 100 bucks. Well, that's $15,000 that she's saving. So $15,000 minus the original $699, you've actually made $14,301

by buying this Dyson Airwrap. Wow. Congratulations, counsellor. It's not basically free. You're running a business here. Now, you will have to declare tax on that. In fact, next time you see your husband, he owes you a thank you.

Let's say she's going to pay tax on that because now she's making money, right? Let's go minus 30%. Equals... She's still making 10 grand on this thing. After tax. Ah, yeah. That's 10 grand in the hand.

And how much is the warranty on this thing? It'll be a two-year warranty. Not with a Dyson. It'll be at least five years. I think they do a seven-year warranty, don't they? My goodness. Far out. Are we talking to a millionaire on the phone?

Hello? Give us some, please. Don't you buy a lot of tickets? Over your seven-year warranty, in the hand, after paying tax on the profit you're making from buying this $699 hairdryer, you're making $70,000 a year.

Ridiculous. Isn't that the average wage now? Yeah. You've got a salary out of buying this purchase. I can resign. You can resign. I chuck it in. Kelsey, quit your job. I don't know if you should resign your job. Quit can resign. You can resign. I'd chuck it in. Kelsey, quit your job.

I don't know if you should resign your job. Quit your job. Call your boss now while you're on the line with us. Tell him you've got girl math. And get your husband too because he owes you a thank you. You're bringing in a double income. This is ridiculous. I think girl math is getting a little bit out of hand.

Absolutely not. Tell us the flaws in our system. I was hard on them there. Yeah, you were. I was hard on them. You were. They had it down to $30 and then scrapped it all and made it making money.

Made $70,000. Fantastic. Well done, Kelsey. Thanks, guys. She's won $70,000. Well done, Kelsey. We'll just give you over to the producers for your bank account details.

We'll transfer over $67,000 to you. Thanks, thanks. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. There is a woman who, I think she's from the UK. She's given up on dating apps. She's really let herself grow. Well, yes, she has.

She moved to Singapore, like a totally new environment. Right, you kind of got to start again. The bars you go to, they're all different. How you meet people's all different. New circle of friends. So she made a challenge for herself and she said for 10 weeks, she's going to try 10 different dating mechanisms, apps, approaches. Right.

So she did Bumble. She did Tinder. She did Hint. She did da-da-da. She did all of them. And then someone suggested to her on TikTok, where she is sharing this journey, have you tried LinkedIn?

And then she shared this with her friend, and her friend was like, actually, I want to hook you up with someone and send her the LinkedIn profile. And she was like, oh, my God. LinkedIn is so much better. Because LinkedIn, if you don't know, I don't have it because I don't really consider myself a professional.

Vaughn has it and just uses it for shits and gags, don't you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. For your work as a phallic design eye. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you've got a design that you're thinking of representing your company with or a cul-de-sac or whatever, sometimes they can look a little phallic. Ask me, I'll say, oh, yeah, there's definitely a CMB in there. You reckon to be avoided.

Do you still have our private investigator company on there? Slick and Eagle. Sorry, what's your company called? Slick and Eagle. Slick and Eagle. Yeah. We're an otter and an eagle. One's slippery and slick and gets in

and the other one's just got sort of a wide view on the entire situation. We used to solve crimes. Did you? Yeah, it was more when we worked afternoons and had more time. Oh god, we had so much time in the afternoons. We'd just spend our mornings solving crimes. Wow. An honour to be in your presence, Slick and Eagle. We'd sometimes sit in the car.

It was mostly just following cheaters, wasn't it? A lot of that. A lot of that. Just get a photo of them coming out of some woman's house and send it to the wife. Easy money. I could be lured back in. I could be lured back in. I could be lured back in now that you've talked about it. I get a little tingle.

I think my nipples are hard. It's good work. It's good work. That's what detective work will do to a man. God, they're getting harder and harder the more you're talking about it. I'm thinking about our previous cases. So this woman in Singapore,

she went on, she was like, the best thing about it is like it's an A grade filter because it's a professional profile. Right. You've got more information about the things about you that are more interesting than whether or not you like

hiking. Also I was going to say would guys be more behaved on LinkedIn because everything is on their profile. There's not a lot of like ab or like gutter shots or like you know schlongs in there. But then in saying that there have been stories of men slipping into LinkedIn DMs

with inappropriateness. Gross, but they'll find anywhere to slip in, to be honest. She said you can filter this like you can with, I don't know if you can on Tinder, I don't know. I've never been on it. But you can filter by education. Right. Like how high up in your education did you get

from, you know, your high school to your PhDs? Also, you can filter everything, everyone from exec level down, so you're only getting those real big salaries. You can filter like industry, and she says you can go looking for doctors, lawyers, finance people. And then thirdly, by country. She's like, you can't filter height and all that kind of stuff. But LinkedIn profile pictures are usually way better pictures

than you with your bloody wraparounds and a fish. So she was like, you're getting a higher level and an easier way to kind of like sift through the shit a bit and find some really classy men. So try LinkedIn. Yeah. Rather than your dating apps. Give it a go.

That's what she's saying. And you can message them. Oh, your job's a bit. But if you're a bit like, bit... Because I don't use LinkedIn. I want to use a term, but it's very much not appropriate for this time of the day on the radio. Find another word. It's a bit...

It's just a self-indulgent... Yeah, you did great. You did great. Did I do great? Yeah, you did great. It's this weird... It's very un-New Zealand, isn't it, to blow your own trumpet. It is, in public, and then expect everybody else to be like, great job. You're great.

You are great. Yeah, it's not very Kiwi, is it? No. I don't know, I talk about how great I am all the time. I can list off all the things I've achieved. People hate it, people hate it. I won the Peter Veer Jones Award in high school for best performance as Richard III in the Sheila Wynn Shakespeare Festival.

Yeah, but that's like having the best fish and chip shop in 2003. This was 2007 and it was a performance of a lifetime. A performance some people still remember. Yeah, but don't be that person that picked in the high school play. Yeah. But I did. But I did. It's okay.

It's all been downhill. I know, yeah, it has, hasn't it? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day, very interesting. You've both been to the Sistine Chapel. Yes. Where's that? Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- I've been to. And they're like, don't take photos. You're like, that's what, I just lined up here for hours. I'm obviously going to sneak a photo. I'm obviously going to take photos. It's amazing that a turtle did this.

Yeah. Kim, silly. Mike, Kim Kardashian, she did it, remember? And there's like all the things like that.

And she was like. But weren't they like, the idea was you, they didn't want the flashes ruining it? So it's the flash. That's the only problem. But iPhones are fine. Just take an iPhone photo.

So do you know why it was banned? The chapel underwent extensive restoration work from 1980 to 1994, and it was funded by the Nippon Television Network Corporation of Japan. The Nippon. The Nippon. I thought you said nipple. I was like, the nipples. Go ahead.

It was funded by the great Italian nipple society. Funded by nipples. So this ended up costing the Nippon Television You said nipple. I was like... The nipples. Go ahead. It was funded by the great Italian Nipple Society. Funded by nipples. So this ended up costing the Nippon Television Network Corporation of Japan $4.2 million. Why did they fund that? I don't know. It's not like the church... Because Japan is out of money. Is it Catholic? Yeah.

No. Japan's not a Catholic... You might have expected Spain to pop in. Yeah, right. Or any of the big Catholic countries. Yeah. Japan, no. So you don't know why Japan did it? I do not know in my... Separate fact of the day, right. Or any of the big Catholic countries. Yeah. Japan, no. So you don't know why Japan did it?

I do not know in my... Separate fact of the day, perhaps. Perhaps a separate fact of the day. What led to them funding it? But anyway, so that meant they made a deal with that, I consider, that they got exclusive rights to film and photograph the artwork. So it was a copyright. What?

So for three years after the restoration was finished, they owned exclusive copyright on the art. That was part of their deal for paying for it. What? So everybody was just told, no photos in the Sistine Chapel. Then it expired after three years, and then people were like,

well, the flash photography could damage the artwork. They were just spent all of this Japanese money. Is there any science behind that? So they just kept the no photos. But actually, you can take photos of the Sistine Chapel. Yeah, right. There's nothing

legally stopping you from taking photos of it. Oh, I didn't know that. It's just the flash. They don't want the flash on. I thought not taking photos was a hangover

from flash photography exposing it to too much light like in the Louvre where you can't take photos of Mona Lisa and stuff and degrading it. But also

I just don't know. I don't know. Call me a purist I just think we shouldn't be looking at photos of Mona Lisa and stuff and degrading it. But also, I just don't know. I don't know. Call me a purist. I just think there's something we shouldn't be looking at photos of it. You've got to behold it with your eyes.

But how close can you get? I need to zoom in. No, you're in a... Sometimes if I'm far away my eyes have got to the point where if I can't read something now I get my camera out and I zoom right in on it

and I take a photo of it and then I can read it on my phone screen. Are you one of those people that turns your light on to read a menu at a restaurant? No, not yet. Not yet.

This has seen chapels got to be like an eight, nine metre start. Like it's very high. I'm not going to be able to see the intricate painting details of Michelangelo from that far away. My eyes are shocking. I need to take photos for later. I love that I just poo-pooed taking a photo, but I've literally Googled it.

And there's so many photos of it. Yes, there are photos of it. Also, in this article that told me about this, do you know it's illegal to take photos of the Eiffel Tower after dark? Why? For purpose of recreation, because somebody owns the copyright on the light show. Oh, for God's sake.

So you have to do it while it's dark, but then it's hard. And another one that was on this interesting list, and I'd never thought about it, how many photos of the Taj Mahal have you seen from the outside? I took a whole bunch. From the outside? When I was there. Not of the inside?

No, you're not allowed. Not allowed because it's a mausoleum. So technically it's like... A tomb. A tomb. So you normally take photos of the inside, but that never occurred to me. I've seen photos from all angles, but not inside.

But not the inside. I took a little bit of the marble, though, from the walls. I didn't. I've seen photos from all angles. Yeah. But not inside. But not the inside. I took a little bit of the marble though from the walls. I didn't. I didn't. I'm kidding. The moment I seen it I was like. No, I didn't. But there was little chips in the Taj Mahal

from people that take a little bit of the white marble. Yeah. Don't do that. Don't do that. So today's fact of the day is the time of which you couldn't take photos of the Taj Mahal was 1994 to 1996. Not the Taj Mahal. The Taj Mahal was 1994 to 1997. Not the Taj Mahal. The Sistine Chapel was 1994 to 1997 until the Nippon Television Network Corporation of Japan's copyright ran out.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- Slipped on the dots that are on the floor on the ground, you know, for blind people, the sort of dots. Oh, yeah. Oh, the pedestrian crossing where you get up to it and if you've got a cane or you're feeling with your feet, you can feel the texture changes indicating it's time to stop. Yeah, so this woman slipped in Tuckapuna, Auckland and broke her foot in three places.

And I was like, oh, my God. Okay. But, you know, they're there for a purpose and it's not for you. And unfortunately, you've paid the price. They shouldn't be slippery though. Yeah. But sometimes there's some missing. Some come up, don't they, and the gap in them can get a little slippery.

Yeah, and I don't know where that story got to because then I read another story that made me laugh even more. I was like, this woman's had a fall, broken her foot in three places. Terrible. There's another woman, and this is in Boston, America, who is basically suing an Italian food emporium called Eataly. Oh, that's funny. Oh, that's good.

That's a good name. That's bloody good. Eat-aly. Because she slipped last year and hurt herself, and then she was like, I slipped on a piece of ham that was on the floor. Like champagne ham? Yeah, like a deli ham. Like a deli- Like champagne ham. Yeah, like a deli ham.

Like a deli ham. Like a deli shaved ham. Now she's suing them for bodily injuries, a loss of enjoyment in life, pain and suffering. Yeah. And she's incurred

a number of medical expenses in all this. Do you remember, was it the woman in, is it Australia, that tried to sue Woolies over there or one of the supermarkets because she slipped on a grape?

Slipped on a grape, yes. And apparently those that, producer Jared, you worked at the produce, didn't you? Did you work at the produce? No, I worked at checkout, but he would have dealt with it. It was a checkout check. I was in checkout, but I spent a lot of time in produce. Wait, were you meant to be in produce?

Yeah, there was a job called door, and it's where you stand at the door and say, Hi. Oh, like beach. Your job is door. Your door can. Yeah. No, because I'd stand there for like two or three hours at a time

not doing anything. Right. And, yeah, just see the occasional person just absolutely get taken down by a rogue grape or a rogue blueberry. Blueberries are worse than grapes because they're smaller. They're like marbles on the ice, right? They just get under your feet and make you slip and you do down? They just squash and it turns into a slick layer of goo

and you land on your butt. Did you prefer door or checkout? I liked door. Dude, door. Door's the best job. It's like you're a professional greeter. I want to do intercom. I want to do the speaking.

Yeah, that would be great. Bong, bong, bong. Anyway, well, I don't know if you've ever seen anyone slip on a piece of ham, but I'm sorry, and I know she's had bully injuries and a loss of enjoyment in life because of this. Oh, but she's only had a loss of enjoyment in life because she's suing a company for a billion dollars.

Yeah, she's a sour, sour woman. But yeah, anyway, I love a fall. I don't know why. It's funny seeing people slip. There's that video that we watched of your friend But yeah, anyway, I love a fall. I don't know why. It's funny seeing people slip. There's that video that we watched of your friend slipping down the deck. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So good, so good. I want to know what took you down.

Yeah, what took you down? What did you slip on? What did you trip on that is just as funny as a slice of ham? The smaller the better. Because a slice of ham is so comical and so funny. Was it a tiny grape or a tiny blueberry? Yeah. Maybe you went into a jewellery shop and one singular bead was on the floor

and it absolutely took you down. Took you down. Craft stores. Yeah. Lots of slippery things in craft stores. All sorts. 0800 dials at M. Want to take your calls now.

You can text as well. 9696. Accompanying videos would be great as well. Oh, yeah. But if you don't have it, we just want to know, what took you down? What took you down? A woman slipped on a piece of ham in the deli.

Funny how every time you say it. Well, it's America, so she's suing them because, you know, ouch. She's also not, there's no disclosure on the extent of the injuries, which makes me think, you know, she's like twisted her ankle or something, and, you know, a blooge. So we want to know this morning, what took you down, Colt? What took you down? Colt, are you there?

I took myself down. Oh, how? How? Walking on a line, and I stood on my own foot Dude Broke the toe You broke a toe You stood on your own, okay wow

I do this quite a lot, I've got quite big feet For a woman and sometimes the toe Is just much further ahead than I thought Than you imagined Trip it up Jessica, this is your friend. What took her down? So she was throwing a Christmas little get-together

with all of our friends. And you know those streamers that you can throw across the room? They come around in that little circle-looking thing. So we've been throwing those around. And she was, I can't remember exactly what she was doing, but she stepped on it and flipped backwards. And it was on video, and she fell backwards into the wall. The massive hole in the glass. Oh, she fell backwards into the wall. The massive hole in the

plaster. Oh wait, we saw it all. Wow. Ridiculous. And then she was there in a rental at the time and they, um, she had to call her stepdad straight away. She was like, oh my god like we can't even lie about it because it's on video what do we do? And they were moving back to England within two months. They had this mad dash

to fix the wall over Christmas. Jeepers. I've never fell through a wall but I can imagine you feel very stupid. Yeah, and it was like it was just going.

It was quite funny but yeah. And just a streamer. Just a little paper streamer that took her down. Alright, keep your texts coming in 9696.

I work in an ice cream shop and I've seen multiple kids drop their ice creams and then proceed to slip over in their own ice cream shop and I've seen multiple kids drop their ice creams and then proceed to slip over in their own ice cream. That's always pretty good. Have you seen the videos of cats that throw up and then step through it and skid through it because they're all scared? No.

It's so good. They're like... For now, we're laughing at you. We're laughing at you and your silliness. And with you. Nah, mostly at, to be fair. What took you down? There's a woman who slipped on a piece of ham

in a supermarket in America, and she is suing. Hannah, what took you down? Sorry, this is a bit of too much information for a Wednesday morning, but amniotic fluid. Oh, baby juice. Baby juice. Yeah, baby juice. I believe it's actually the baby jus, because that's what the baby's been cooking in. Oh, yeah, baby juice. I believe it's actually the baby jus,

because that's what the baby's been cooking in. Oh, you're beautiful. Slow cooked as well, nine months. A slow cooked nine month at a 37 degrees. That is a beautifully slow cooked baby. Oh, yeah, delicious. Was this, yeah, you a midwife or was this your birth? No, I am a midwife.

Okay. So I work in a primary birthing unit. Basically, mama came along, third baby, very fast delivery, zoomed in the room. Amazing, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And we were all just running around like headless chickens, trying to get our gloves on and catch this bubba.

And while I was, yeah, in the middle of trying to get myself sorted, I just put one foot straight into the middle of the goop on the floor and just went straight down. So, like, this, like, force-slip situation. Slipped in your own goop. Yeah, and then it was, yeah, it was quite uncomfortable. And the poor mum who's, like, actually, like, in the middle of delivering a baby, she, like, turned around.

She was just like, are you okay? I'm like, I'm absolutely fine. Like, you just carry on with your thing. You need to get the Crocs with the extra traction. Yeah, a little extra traction. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, go on. Yeah, I know exactly.

I didn't have the Crocs on, so that's probably what didn't save me. What would you compare the fluid to? Like, is it, like, dishwashing liquid? Or, like like how slippery? Well, it's made up, pretty much it's made of like mum's water, but it's mixed with baby's urine, bit of protein, so it's a bit more stickier, but quite watery.

Kind of like a sweet and sour sauce packet that you put in with your vegetables. Yeah, it could be with your meat. Yeah, wood down, that's thick. We love a stir-fry goop, don't we? We do love a stir-fry goop. Hannah, thank you for sharing this morning. And what took you down? Hi.

So, hi there. I was in the middle of winter, putting on my flannelette jammies, got my toes stuck in between, you know, the middle part of the... Oh, my God, yes, in the crotch. Yeah. Started doing a couple of hops, actually being headfirst into the door jam, which is on the door frame.

You would have looked like such a dick. I got up, I stood up, feeling a bit dazed, and my son came walking out, and he, eight at a time, looked at me, started crying and I was thinking, why are you crying? And he goes, what's wrong, what's wrong? And I had blood pouring from my face. Oh, whoa, you really took a fall.

I ended up having to go to A&E. They then came and did a triage, asked me who I live with at home and I said, oh, just my eight-year-old son. And then they continued to ask me a number of questions is everything ok at home oh really I mean good though, that is good

it is good but actually you were just pants down, pyjamas and I couldn't try and convince them that I actually just got my toes stuck in the jammies and had to sit my foot in open. Oh, my God. Yeah.

Wow. A couple of stinted and home. And home. They thought my eight-year-old son might have... Yeah. They clocked you in. He did it. Amazing.

Ange, thanks for sharing some messages in. Someone said, I used to work at a 24-hour fast food outlet. Okay. At three o'clock in the morning when the clubs shut down and people would start coming in, I would mop the floors. Oh my God,

you little, you're setting up a trap. Just set a trap watching people who were too inebriated come in and just either had the deck on the way or when they had

their tray of food or a bag, they were concentrating less than they'd go down. I don't think you'd get away with that in America. It's fine here with ACC. You'd chuck up a little sign, a little wet floor sign, they'd probably kick it over and than they'd go down. I don't think you'd get away with that in America. It's fine here with ACC. They'd chuck up a little sign, a little wet floor sign.

They'd probably kick it over and think they're real clever. Yeah. At a Bunnings sausage sizzle in Australia, someone slipped on an onion from a sausage sizzle. I think I remember this. We are now required due to the Bunnings handbook to put the onion under the sausage.

Oh, right. So it used to be on top. So the sausage holds down the onion. I'm not against that idea because sometimes when you're eating it and the onion's on top, the onion will slip around and get away. There's a message about someone that did a bit of a sideshow bob. I took myself down. I was raking, found a piece of glass in the grass, so I put the rake down to pick it up.

It was under a tree, I stepped back and onto the rake, and then the rake came up and slammed him in the back. Now that's classic. That's the silly Simpsons stuff. Great humour right there. If you liked today's podcast, tell your friends

you could send them the link. And if you don't have any friends, just pretend you did. Yeah, great. And rate and review. And maybe get out there and try to make some friends.