ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 17th April 2024

Episode Date: April 16, 2024

Boomer Pause  Silly Little Poll!Top 6: Airlines  Kissing with your Eyes Open  Hayley's Bottle  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch Vaughan and Hayley minus Vaughan today. He's away for a couple of days.

He is. School holiday related. Yeah. Um, I think that's all we can say. Yeah, I think that's all we can say. He's got his daddy pants on. It's a little project he's working on. Now, we need to talk about this.

What? Lip balm situation. I was, a while back, shamed for my lip balm use in which I had created a tapered tip. Like a lipstick. Yeah, and now you've done it to yours. It's pointy.

I don't know why it's gone like that. Just on an angle. I must use it on the same angle every time. All the time. You should flip it. Without noticing. It must use it on the same angle every time. All the time. You should flip it. Without noticing. It's going to get to that real skinny tip.

And then it's going to break off. And then it's going to snap off. Hmm. Hmm. All right. Well, we're lip-balmed up. Food for thought. Lip-balmed up for the show.

You're going to do the top six today? Yes, I am. Now, there is an airline, I believe, that is wanting to use poopy gases to propel it. Okay. So I've got the top six names for poop-driven airlines. Right. So they'll use human waste. Look, I'll get to the bottom of the science of it.

That's incredible. They use the gases that we make to sort of fire the engines. But it's not going to mean everybody on the plane has to be fueling, like it'll be pre-done. Has to be. We're already doing it. I just fart the whole time I'm on planes. Oh, yeah. Those, whoever opens the door for planes, I feel sorry for them.

Oh, my gosh. After like a long 15-hour flight. That air must be horrible. Stagnant. Yeah. We will give you the chance as well around 20 past 7 this morning to win a Toshiba heat pump. Good timing. I was going to say a brand new,

but of course we're not going to give away a second hand. We're not going to rip out some Toshiba heat pump from someone's house. We have gone to the op shops. We've found a number of heat pumps and we're auctioning them off. So a brand new Toshiba heat pump plus $200. We'll play another game of hot or cold today around 20 past 7. This is perfect timing with winter imminent. Oh, it is imminent.

Imminent. Next on the show, we need to talk about the millennial and now boomer pause that happens before videos. We literally just filmed a video before. The pause was... It was almost Boomer-esque. It was almost Boomer. Play. ZDM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley.

Well, an article from the Guardian online talks about the millennial pause and now the Boomer pause. Now, this is the pause that people make when they post a story or a video online. Yeah.

And they're just waiting. To make sure it's going. To make sure it's going. You see it counting down? One, two, three. Hey, guys. Yeah. So I think that was coined around like three years ago.

Yeah. This kind of was a thing, the millennial pause. Well, now there's the boomer pause. And this article says, the sign that shows you really should get off social media. Ouch. Ouch. They're just trying to make sure it's on. The boomer pause is less of a pause and it's more, it's frowning and like getting closer to the camera.

You know, it's not a pause. They're doing a lot in there. Yeah. But yeah, they're always, that's my mum. How do I show you? Like if I'm talking to my mum, bless. Is my mum a boomer? No.

How old is she? 64. How old are boomers? I think she's the next one down. 60 to 69 boomers. Boomers two. There's boomers one and boomers two. Okay, I think my mum's boomers. I think she's the next one down. 60 to 69. Boomers. Boomers 2. There's boomers 1 and boomers 2.

Okay, I think my mum's boomers 2. Okay, boomers 1 is 70 to 78. Yeah, yeah. And boomers 2, 60 to 69. Nice. Those are my parents. I've never heard it called Generation Jones. Have you?

No, Gene Jones. Generation Jones. Gene Jones. Gene Jones. Boomers too. But I guess that would be kind of like older millennial, young millennial. Yeah, I suppose so. But my mum will do like, will she be on FaceTime?

And it'll just be the chin for so long. And I'm like, awesome. That's such a great shot. And then I'll be like, oh, how's the Renault going or something? And instead of flipping the camera, or she tries to find the flip the camera thing, she can't, so she just flips the front-facing camera. But then she can't see it, so it's just like ceiling and floor and...

Bless. I know, bless. Now, Shannon, at the social media desk, you're in charge of our social media. We did a video this morning. We were very... I guess we were aware of the millennial pause. Yeah, well, you

sort of hit the button and then it wasn't clear that the video had started. But is this a problem that you face often, Shannon? Yes, you guys are pretty criminal. Fletch is the worst, I will say. But Fletch does it on purpose. Yeah, I now do it on purpose. But the thing is,

like, I come from like, I mean, and you'd be the the thing is, like, I come from, like, I mean, and you'd be the same, is it's all, like, it's going to be edited down. Oh, yeah. It's not like we ever do a live. Shannon, who edits it, is like, it would be so awesome if I didn't have to. I will say.

I would rather not miss something at the start. I'd rather leave a tail in and you easily edit it off. When people are like, in a minute, and you're like, oh, you've already started. I will say at my old station, I once cut a video of all the millennial pauses and it did not get the green light to go on social. I thought it was funny. A bit sensitive.

It was a bit of a sensitive topic. You guys do hit a millennial pause. Vaughn does it too, but he does the boomer squint you guys were describing. Fletch is purposeful. Hayley's normally pretty hot. Wow. What a compliment for you

to get this morning. Pause for applause. But whereas if I was doing a story straight to Instagram, I'd go straight away. Yeah. Whereas we always, you just give us the phone

with your video open. Yeah, always do not disturb as well when I hand it over. I get nervous. Yeah, I know. We don well when I hand it over. I get nervous. Yeah, I know. We don't want to be seeing bloody the magician's schlong. What about if we make it cool again? You know, like make it intentional.

I don't think that's going to be the next girl math. Hang on, hang on, stay with. Yeah, I don't know. Is this the next girl math? The millennial pause is cool. Well, on all my social media this week, I will be doing big millennial pauses, trying to make it cool.

Maybe, you know how you put in the subtitles, you just have like millennial pause in brackets. That could be funny. That's a good idea. See, now you're making a trend. That's funny. That's a trend. Then we can make a minga mix.

A minga mix. A minga mix. A minga mix. A minga mix. A minger mix. A minger mix. A minger mix. Who are you calling a minger? I don't know why, but it just sounded like you swore. I don't know why that sounded really insulting. Did she just call us a minger?

I think she did. A minger mix. Gosh. Next on the show, we need to talk about Mr Beast. I know. He's so rich. He makes so much money and he films short little moments inside his house and everyone's like

hang on. What's going on here? I would say it's up there with the time Drew Barrymore showed us her tiny TV like two weeks ago. Everyone was like get a better TV. You're like rich. They're like a hundred bucks. Hurry up. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn

and Hayley. If you don't know who Mr Beast is, how would you even describe him? He's a YouTuber Hurry up If you don't know who MrBeast is How would you even describe him? He's a YouTuber who makes these Like large scale videos He did the He did the Squid Games When he does his videos

He puts in hundreds of millions of dollars into them And then he makes that back And then he gives away a lot of it He has this whole I think he's a really good dude He away a lot of it. Like, he has this whole, like, I think he's a really good dude. He does a lot of charity, doesn't he? Yeah, he has Mr. Beast philanthropy,

where he takes all the profit, and he, like, builds schools in Africa, or, like, gives people eye surgery so they can see again. It's pretty amazing. And am I right in saying he is the first YouTube billionaire? Yeah.

He's, oh, is he a billionaire? But then if he's investing and then giving it away. So yeah, his personal wealth isn't because he just makes it, spends it, makes it,

spends it, makes it, spends it. And he makes all of his friends and family rich. Yeah. But he did like a little sort of behind the scenes

tour of his own house, which has been spoken about before that it's very, very humble. Would you call it a house? It's a one beddy apartment. It's like a studio. Yeah, studio apartment. It's like, very humble. Would you call it a house? It's a one-beddy apartment. It's like a studio. Yeah, studio apartment.

It's like there's just one room with like a single bed in it, a little desk, like, you know, like a cheap little Ikea desk with a workstation on it. And everyone's like, you've just got a single bed. Like, what's up with that? What happens when the girlfriend comes over? Well, apparently he just like gets a hotel room because, you've just got a single bed. Like, what's up with that? Like, what happens when the girlfriend comes over? Well, apparently he just, like, gets a hotel room because, you know, you're a multimillionaire.

Just get an Airbnb, a nice Airbnb. Of course you would. Now, we were going to talk about this as in, like, oh, my God, Mr. Beast, who makes $83 million a year himself. Like, that's not even what his, like, videos make because they make way more than that. So how's he making the money then? Just on site?

Oh, because he's got that chocolate. He's got the chocolate. He's got the burgers. Right, okay. He'd have a lot of side hustles. My bigger problem is he's got a TV screen, which is bigger than Drew Barrymore's, but it's not by any stretch of the imagination

like a billionaire rich TV. It's on the wall and the cord is not through the wall. You're a billionaire. You can hide the cords. Thank you. Jared's shaking his head. You can hide the cords. Jared, it's unacceptable.

I see the look on your face. Like, just, I'm not rich. And you hide your cords. I hide my, I can't, I'm a renter. I'm not allowed to drill into the wall. but man, if I could, I would. You can get a nice plastic cover to do that. You should make it tidy. This thing is hanging rogue.

Oh, no. It's just loose and then just like, yuck. Does he have cats? That's a cat hazard. That is a cat hazard as a new cat owner. That's a cat hazard. It's a hazard. Yeah.

It's honestly just like very, very humble. Do you know what it kind of looks like? A quest suite. It looks like a quest suite. It's a chazard. Yeah. It's honestly just like very, very humble. Do you know what? It kind of looks like a quest suite. It looks like a quest suite. You know a quest suite. And there's nothing wrong with a quest suite. Nothing wrong with a quest suite. A quest suite.

You know, you get a lovely kitchenette. It has big kitchenette vibes. It's got big quest vibes. And as we're saying, like, as a young man, this is an absolutely expected studio apartment. But for a multi-millionaire, the biggest star on YouTube, he is a billionaire, by the way. It's just interesting. It's weird, isn't it?

Especially when you look at the likes of like Elon Musk and whatever with their like exorbitant. Elon Musk sold all of his houses. That's right, he did too. Remember he was like, I don't need a house. Yeah. And I was like, okay. I'm not going to need a house, I'm off to Mars. I mean, I guess when you are like that rich, the richest person on earth, you just rent...

Do you ever get bored of money? Maybe. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe that's why you have to fly to Mars. Yeah. And up in rockets because that's the only thing that kind of excites you anymore. Yeah.

Not hiding your wires. That and being like called a fat little pig or something. You know, like I sort of feel like that would excite him. Do you know what I mean? Like being negged. Yeah, being negged. Okay. Elon Musk loves getting negged. Play ZM's Fletchford and Hayley.

Fletchford and Hayley, silly little po, silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Today's silly little pole. When you are at home, what do you drink out of? Glass, water bottle or other? Which I assume would be a mug? Yeah. Or maybe you've got a drinking fountain at home. Yeah. Or maybe you

lap from a bowl like a cat. Yeah. And who are we to judge? Not judging. There is no judging here. No. I drink mostly out of water bottles at home, but I don't have a water bottle at home. Do you? Because I'm always glasses at home. Yeah. And at work it's water bottle, but I don't have a water bottle at that moment. Do you? Because I'm always glasses at home. Yeah. And at work, it's water bottle, the gym,

or out and about, water bottle. Yeah, in the gym, imagine having a glass at the gym. You fill it up. You just fill it up. You know, usually water bottles, but, and then glasses for everything else, like Alkma whole. Yeah.

You know? Well, we asked the people, 60% of people said water bottle. 38% of people said a glass. And 3% said other. Okay. I hope to hear from the others. McWally's, Kia ora, says,

I can't go past my trusty Camelback drink bottle seven years down and new sucky tip doesn't even fit, cry face. Stop improving. Some of us didn't lose the old one. Okay, well that's just a review for Camelback. Oh, right. Okay, yeah, that sounds like that should be on the website. This isn't the Camelback. Yeah, this is sort of feedback. It's not Google

Reviews. Yeah. I will say that's a long time for a drink bottle. Like, just get a new drink bottle. It's feeling gross at that point. It's feeling a bit manky. What was I sipping out of the other day and straight up it tasted like dusty mould. I think it was a SodaStream. We're bad at that, using our SodaStream bottles as drink bottles by the bed.

Yeah, same. And we're always like, ugh. But it got a bit mouldy. See, maybe I do drink bottles. Is that technically drink bottles at home? I'd say SodaStream bottles are drink bottles. Because this is bad. I live alone, so I drink straight out of the SodaStream bottles.

Yeah. I live with one other person and we do the same. Yeah. You're allowed to do that. It's yours. Vanessa says, always got my Frank Green bottle. I don't even know where mine is anymore. I think it took it.

It's like a cat. It took itself away to die. You'll just be under the deck one day and it'll just be covered in weeds. Yeah, and I'll be like, oh, there you went. Decomposing. There you went. Kristen says, both, meaning glass and bottle. I have a water bottle in the bedroom and in the lounge and kitchen.

It's a glass. Well, you're absolutely mad to have glasses bedside. You've got to have a drink bottle. I do sometimes, and I've always regretted it. You always knock it. Alice says, used to be my hydro flask water bottle till you guys talked about them giving people smoker's lips. The sucking.

Yes. Now I only use my bottle when I'm out of the house. I'm glad to know that we influence you into having less crinkly lips. We've scared you out of having smoker's lips. But that's why... What do you think about this one? This is like a protein shaker, I guess.

Is that giving me smoke as well? No, because you're not sucking. You're just pouring it in. Yeah. I do have a bit of a... going on. I'm going to open that up. Maybe you need a wider mouth.

I do need a wider mouth. Janice says, water bottle so I can get an accurate measurement of what I have drunk for the day. Agreed. When you have a cup of water, you're like, how much is that? Yeah, is it 200 mils? 200 mils?

500 mils? 100 mils? I don't even know. But then I don't, does it matter how many mils you get? Yeah. I'm not getting enough at the moment. And do you know why? It's because I don't have a drink bottle.

Okay, you need to buy one. Yeah, I'm going to. And Kat says, try use a glass to avoid lip wrinkles. Lip wrinkles, there you go. But I would use a glass to avoid lip wrinkles. Lip wrinkles. Here you go. But I would prefer a bottle. We have absolutely scared the nation. Oh, Andrea says, glass to wear cats.

Because Raleigh drinks out of our, if you leave a cup around, Raleigh drinks out of it. Yeah. And my last cat used to tip them over. Yeah. Will you raise little shits, eh? It's because when they do it the first time, I think that it's funny and it's cute. It's cute, yeah.

And so I don't want to stop that behaviour. Now, what's the brand of your bottle? Yeti. Yeti. Someone said, I didn't pay $65 for a Yeti bottle not to parade it around my house and slam it on the fake marble benchtops.

Yep. These are amazing. Yeah. Oh, more feedback. Steph, I use a water bottle, but that's because my orange cat Audrey is obsessed with water. She tries to put her head in the glass, mine too, and will knock it over.

Pretty much any liquid in any glass or mug, coffee, tea, coke, alcohol, the girl is obsessed. Now we do have a photo of Audrey on her back. Oh, Audrey's cute. Fluffy belly. And again, just cementing the fact that cats with human names is the best thing ever. Oh, it's so funny. Giving Rolly, I should have called him, you know, Roy or something.

Yeah. Yeah. Ronald. I like really human names like Keith. Nigel. Nigel's great. Best cat name ever. Next pet. Nigel. Nigel's great. Best cat name ever. Next pet is Nigel. Play

ZM's Fletchford and Ailey. Play ZM. A man who is serving life in prison in Iowa. He was sent to prison in 1996 for... Because life in prison in America means life in prison. It does, yeah. No parole. He

brutally clubbed a man to death with the handle of a pickaxe. Okay. I didn't know they were going to get into the crime itself. I'm putting that out there. Because we must remember that as we talk in jest now about his life sentence.

Because he has he now about his life sentence because he has uh he's challenging his life sentence because he died momentarily uh i believe he had a heart yeah like a cardiac arrest yeah um and in 2015 he died for a moment in time yeah a moment A moment of time. Yeah. So he's now saying that he served his life sentence. Because his life ended. Because his life ended. He was dead. I know. I was reading this like, I, wow, my dude, I get it.

Because your life sentence comes to an end when your life ends. And so when you are declared dead, as he was momentarily, not for long, the sentence therefore is concluded. But then he came back to life. He was brought back to life. He's still the man that murdered, brutally, another man. Or

is it a second life? That's his argument, right? As he's going like, well technically, the life I was in did end So what's the deal? He's got attorneys

and they're arguing There is absolutely no way that this is going to be overturned No, so just looking here, it's a lower court in Iowa listening to the argument. The three panel justice, Amanda Potterfield, wrote, excuse me, I'm choking up here.

No, we do not believe the legislature intended the provision which defines the sentences for the most serious class of felonies, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, I was like, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah. Legal jargon. The judge concluded that Schreiber is either still alive, in which case he must remain in prison,

or he's actually dead, in which case his appeal is moot. Yeah, and he's not dead. He's not dead. So he's 66 and he's still in prison. Well, speaking of being 66, producer Carwin just asked the question, does he get a new birthday? Do you think you get a new birthday

the day that you were brought back to life? Yeah, I think that's fun. I think you just do it for funsies. Yeah, I had a grandfather have this happen. Oh, really? If you're not in prison for murder, do it for funsies. Now, was your grandfather in prison for murder before we get into this?

No, but he was declared done and then what they say on the... Time of done 644 produce the done certificate. Yeah, and resuscitated came back to life and he's like that's it, I'm zero. And so we started

he got to his fifth birthday then and we changed his birthday just like between us not legally. But started, he got to his fifth birthday then and he changed his birthday, just like between us, not legally. But yeah, he got to five before he ended up properly being done. I love that he did that. That's hilarious. Yeah, he's like, I'm going to school this year. And we had like a fifth birthday cake and it was real cute. He didn't actually go to school though,

because that might have been a bit creepy. That would have been sort of weird. There's this old man doing here. He was a cute old man. Oh, that's sweet. They all are. That would have been sort of weird. Yeah, a little bit. What's this old man doing here? He was a cute old man. Oh, that's sweet. They all are. Yeah. Wow.

I love that. It's not going to work, is it? No, it's absolutely not. Is he still in prison? Still in prison, 66, and he'll be there until he dies. Oh, okay. Proper die.

Until he's proper done. Proper done. Play. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah.ughan and Hayley blah blah blah blah blah blah blah this is the top six hi

Vaughan's away being a dat and so I'm in charge of the top six and I, do you know what I really want to bring to the top six today is a sense of maturity yeah, sometimes we love the boy but Vaughn can be very silly. Okay.

And so I've really wanted to address this in a really refined, mature fashion. Yeah. Now, there is an airline, it's called Whiz Air, which is working with a biofuel company to trial using sewage and human waste as a sustainable aviation fuel. Which is great because there's a lot of humans on this planet and we all poop. We all poop.

And if they can... That's what they said in that song. Everybody poops. Everybody poops. Sometimes. Sometimes. Yeah. Always.

And so if we can be fueling planes and making it cheaper for us to fly. Yeah. Surely that's a good thing. So they've worked out it takes about, please be mature. It takes 228 tonnes of poop to create one tonne of aviation fuel. So it's going to require a lot of us. Right. But then you just hook it up to a sewerage system, right?

Totally. Easy. So the UK alone creates 57 million tonnes of human effluent a year. So we can mine this poop. But again, sieve. There's got to be a filter. There's got to be a sieve. As we said to Shannon yesterday, you've got

to sieve your stools. Now, the airline is called Whizier that is looking into this. I'm following them. They're like a cheap Hungarian, like a Jetstar or budget airline in Europe. Yeah. Well, when they finally get this human waste airline going.

Oh, I just had a thought. You know when you get onto the little planes at the airport and you can smell the aviation fuel and it's real nice? Won't be nice much longer. Is it going to smell like shit? Yeah, you'll be walking onto the plane like, oh my God, oh my gosh. Who did that?

Oh my God, who did that? No, it's the plane. Oh my God. Well, I've got the top six names for the new poop-filled airline. Okay. Just some brainstorming ideas. Again,

keeping it mature, refined. Approached from maturity. Yep. Number six. Instead, keeping it mature, refined. Approached from maturity. Yep. Number six, instead of Qatar Airways, Yeah. Fata Airways.

Okay. It's just a play on Yeah. an airline that already exists, it's recognisable, it's just a little play. Fata Airways. Number five on the list

of the top six names for the new poop-fuelled airline instead of Aer Lingus, Air Ringas. Because that's where the fuel's coming from. Yeah, yeah. Not Ealingus. Very refined and mature.

Earingus. Yeah. Number four, just keeping it mature, number four on the top six names for the new poop-fuelled airline in Hungary, instead of Air New Zealand, Rear New Zealand. Easy. Do you know what I mean? It's almost recognisable,

but it's giving a nod to where the fuel's coming from. Yep. Okay, number three on the list of the top six names for the new poop-fuelled airline instead of Emirates, Emishits. I don't know if they can just rebrand. They've got quite a good image there. I don't know if they can just rebrand. They've got quite a good image there. I don't know if they'd want shits in the name.

You reckon? Emirates. Emishits. But all the poop has to come from Emmas. From Emmas around the world. Are there enough Emmas to power? It's a very common name. It's a big airline.

Well, it's a big name. And Emmas do poop a lot. And if I know an Emma, she poops. Poop a lot. Especially if I know an Emma, she poops. Poop a lot. Especially the vegetarian ones. Oh, my God. Yeah. It's just lentils on lentils on lentils.

Beans, they go right through you. Right through you. Number two on the list of the top six names for the new poop-fueled airline. Instead of Turkish Airlines, why not Turkish Airlines? Okay. Please be mature. Yeah, this is my Turdish Airlines? Okay. Please be mature. Yeah, this is my favourite so far. Okay, and number one on the list of the top six names

for the new poop-fuelled airline. Instead of Bamboo Airways, which is a Vietnamese... Airline, yeah. ...Bum-poo Railways. Wow. We got there. Really mature and refined from you. Thank God Vaughan's not here, because he would have made that very silly. He got there. Really mature and refined from you. God, Vaughan's not here because he would have made that very silly.

He would. Instead, I've approached this with such maturity that it's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Now, this is a survey out of America. Oh, a study out of America, sorry. That says that the majority of people are not getting enough sleep. That's not news to anyone, is it? Not getting enough sleep.

It is at the forefront of my mind at the moment, sleep. Because you've really gone on a bit of a sleep yearny. Oh, yeah, I prioritised sleep last year and it was revolutionary. It's really changed you around. Whereas for me, sleep is the first thing I can part with. You're just like, well to put other things in ahead of it.

I'll just stay up until 11 o'clock when I'm getting up at 4am. It's fine. It's fine. I did this last night. I did a gig last night, which you know, I'm working towards Comedy Festival, so I know I don't gig all the time. But you get home at like 10, then I'm like, gotta have working towards comedy festivals, so I know I don't gig all the time. But you get home at like 10, and I'm like, got to have a shower.

Yeah. You're still wired because you've been out. Still wired a little bit. You've been in like a little hustle bustle thing. Like I always find it really hard to go to sleep after a concert. Yeah, how are you? Because you're just buzzing. Yeah, wake up early and your ears are still ringing. You just had the most amazing time.

Yeah. Well, 54% of Americans said they don't get as much sleep as they need regularly. 45% said they imagine they would feel better if they got more sleep. Oh, my God. The other day when I was staying at my parents' house, I arrived and I had like sort of text ahead to my mum and dad being like, I'm arriving pretty tired. Like I've got great company. Yeah. And they were like, it's fine.

We're tired too. We went out for dinner really early and came home. We were like, should I go to bed? So 8 o'clock we were jumping into bed. Probably 8.30, I reckon I'd fallen asleep. I woke up at 8 a.m. the next morning. Now, that does not happen. Like, I didn't even get up to go to the toilet.

Wow. It was crazy. Yeah, I love when you have those amazing sleeps. But there was a little bit too much. Yeah. I reckon. But they happen few and far between for most people. God, yeah.

So there's another article I was just looking at. So we're not getting enough sleep, right? This is like worldwide for sure. Then there's this article where AI kind of used sleep data about sleep deprivation. Yeah. And it created these images of two different, well, it's the same person,

but it's a version of them if they got the appropriate amount of sleep for their age as they aged, versus if they were not getting enough and the difference in their appearance. And there's this like graph. So it's a woman. The age categories are 18 to 24,

25 to 34. Yeah. I'm still in that category. Isn't that wild? How long for? How long for? When's October? Not long. 35 to 34. Yeah. I'm still in that category. Isn't that wild? How long for? How long for? When's October? Not long.

35 to 44. And it shows the difference in like the woman's face. Oh, wow. If she lived a life getting enough sleep or if she lived a life not getting enough sleep. And it is, it's exactly what you imagined it to be. Her hair's a mess. She's droopy.

She's a bit puffy. She's got like saggy under eyes and all this kind of stuff. Yeah. It's easier said than done though, isn't it? It is, especially because a lot of people

will even try to get sleep, but they'll get in bed and then just be on their phone. Yeah. And you've got to get off your phone. You've got to get off your phone. Because you don't, the light keeps you awake.

From a resident sleep expert. Yeah, yeah. How many hours can you get? Like probably eight. And you get up at four, which How many hours do you reckon you get? Like probably eight. And you get up at four, which is amazing. Seven and a half to eight hours every night, yeah. But I'm in bed at like, last night I think it was like 10 to eight. Like I'm on rest home hours.

Your bedtime starts at the seven. No, like eight, it'll be eight, eight, anytime around eight o'clock. I know. Do you know what, people listening as well that have kids are like, screw you. Yeah. You try to do that.

Yeah. But people that have, you know, like insane job hours. Oh yeah. Yeah. It's hard. It's hard.

Well, just if you can accept having a big saggy baggy face and, you know, never feeling a hundred percent, then just keep living your life. Ten past seven next on the show. I saw something yesterday and it shocked me. And then I was telling you about it and you've revealed something to me.

Yeah, they don't bung it. They don't bung it. In Altair Square in Auckland at the moment, they have popped up for the school holidays a kind of inflatable wonderland. Oh. I don't really know what it is. Oh, I like when you see, like, I'm always, like, real jealous

when I see those inflatable water world things that they put up. And I'm like, We didn't have that when I was a kid. It's not fair. We used to have one at Eastbourne Pool and it was, like, one of those one skinny thing's the length of the thing, you know,

and you'd run it. But now it's the size of like Napier. Oh my god, it's huge. There's one in Hawke's Bay, Aikawa, that's amazing. There's an inflatable world out where I live by the strawberry picking fields and they do one but it's not huge. Yeah, I saw one in Cromwell

on the lake over summer a few years back and that was insane. Yeah. So this is like, it's not water but it's like you go in and I guess you run around and stuff. It's not the Titanic slide. Not the Titanic slide. I've always wanted to go on that. Yeah.

No, it's like this fun little world. Anyway, I was in the area and I looked and I saw it and I was like, that looks like fun. If I was a kid, man, you'd be like, hey! You'd be like, man, can we have five dollars to go in there? I'm imagining it's way more than five dollars. Give me your money.

I know I can't find it. I can't find actually like what it is. Anyway, but I looked at it and I was like, that's awesome. What a cool place. Inflatable world. Inflatable world. New Zealanders hosting. Oh, yeah.

Arborealis Luminarium One of the most unique Walkthrough experiences ever Just went up in Auckland's Altair Square Massive inflatable Playground Well there you go if you're in Auckland For the school holidays

Oh my god look it we should go We're not kids it's all lit up See that's not fair But we could go because we don't need to ask mum for $5. We make our own money. Yeah, but then we can't go and then it's just kids. We don't have kids. It would just be weird.

Children's tickets are $17. Adults are $20. But they should do an adults only time. Oh no, but look, it looks so cool. Yeah, it does. Non-spawn, by the way. Non-spawn, yeah. Oh, my God.

Anyway, I saw this inflatable world. It's huge. And I was like, ha, look at that. It's all blown up. Then I didn't even hear it happen, but I was doing something that we'll talk about later. And then I, like, turned around and it was deflated. And I was like, what? Why did they take the air out of it,

knowing that they're just going to have to pump air back into it tomorrow and blow it back up? So it had closed for the day. It closed for the day. It was 5 o'clock or whatever the time was. It had closed for the day. And I was like, I didn't know that these inflatable worlds get the air sucked out and then blown back into them the next day.

And I mentioned this to you in the studio this morning. I was like, God, I can't believe what a waste of air. You know, what are we just made of air? I was like, what do you think? They just bung them up? Yes. It's not an air mattress. I thought they blow it up.

No, there's generators running all the time. So it's constantly being filled with air. Yeah, that keeps them erect. But I thought it got erect and then it got bunged and it stayed that way all day. Nah. They're constantly running. I mean, I think that's my...

I reckon they could. Because I've hired... Vaughan and I hired a bouncy fun castle once. And you have to have it going all the time. The generator, the little air blower. Even a bouncy castle? Yeah, even a bouncy castle. Why don't you just bung it up?

I don't know why you just bung it up. Once the air's in there, you just bung it up. I don't know. Why don't you bung it up? I don't understand. That's how it works. I'm just seeing if anyone's messaging. I just realised I'm on text machine today because Vaughn's away.

You're on text machine, Judy. You can borrow my kids. I'll even pay for you to take them. Is it weirder if two adults go on their own or is it weirder

that two adults go with two stranger kids? Don't palm on your kids to us for free babysitting during the school holidays. No, we have made a choice not to have kids. There's a reason

we don't have kids. If it was bunged up it would burst, someone says. It needs to release the air. Oh, yes, because you imagine all the kids that are jumping on there. Yeah. Like it's kind of like breathing like a heart. So many people are saying you can borrow my kids. No.

You had them. They are your responsibility. That's your issue, mate. Now, someone said you could take the orphans Now we did make an announcement at the live show Should I break the noise? They're missing Break the news

Yeah, well the presumed dead We don't know where they are The orphans are presumed dead We have not heard nor seen them I have a sneaking suspicion They will appear closer to Christmas Like they always annoyingly do Excuse me Someone said if you bung it up A big fatty will jump on it It'll pop they will appear closer to Christmas, like they always annoyingly do.

Excuse me, someone said if you bung it up, a big fatty will jump on it, it'll pop. How dare you? Borrow it low, you can have mine. I'll pay you to take my kids. You can borrow my kids. I know kids you can borrow. People don't admit it, but they do regret having them.

Because we have so much fun, don't we? I'm hearing regret. We have a lot of fun with our kids, don't we? I'm hearing regret. Yeah, we have so much fun don't we? I'm hearing regret. We have a lot of fun with our kids don't we? I'm hearing regret. Yeah we have so much fun. Our life is one big inflatable playground and it's bunged up you never have to deflate it. Okay

Keanu Reeves. I love Keanu Reeves as like a person. I just think he's such a fun and interesting guy. Yeah. As an actor, you know what? Take or leave him. Wow. What about John Wick?

Those are great action movies. Yeah, he's a great action actor. Just not a great... Are you saying not a great actor? Okay, a bit stiff. A bit stiff. But it's okay. I mean, you've done all those movies.

I guess you can... For me When I do movies Yeah yeah yeah I go for a more realistic Yep Which you'll see Yep

In the movies I'm in Now but As a Like he's been caught doing this before And he's doing it again What about Bill and Ted's cinematic masterpiece? Jared Jared raises a great point there

It's a very funny film, but it didn't require good acting. Anyway, Keanu has been caught again kissing his girlfriend, Alexandra Grant, with his eyes open. Like, just fully like... It's so weird. People are saying that because he was caught doing this

previously by the paparazzi, that he's just doing it in front of them to make it a thing. To make a point, to make a thing out of it. Which I kind of go like, it's very on brand for him. He's very like, doesn't give a toss what people think. But it is weird because

the first time, was he playing around? Or was he actually kissing with his eyes open? I think he's just kissing with, but her eyes are closed. That's what you do. The moment your mouth goes like that, you just go. Producers, everybody's kissing with eyes closed, right? That's the thing. Let's just confirm on this team.

Let's confirm on this. What are you calling us? Maniacs? I'm just checking I don't work with maniacs. Of course. Yeah. Okay. Wow, Jared.

Producer Jared's very quiet. We're quiet here, Jared. If anyone was going to be an open-eye kisser. No, I'm not an open-eye kisser, but my eyes stay open until the point of contact because I don't want to go into their face. No, but you can feel it. Oh, my God, you can feel it, Jared.

You can feel when you're about to dog. You can feel the dog. Look, there have been one or two occasions where my eyes were shut and a toothy connection was made. Oh, you gnashed the teeth into the chin or something. You're going in too hungrily. Or like I close my eyes, tilt my head. They close their eyes.

Tilt the same way. Tilt the same way. All of a sudden, noggins are knocking. No, no, you definitely keep them open to establish the tilt. And then as you're coming in, they close. At what point must the eyes be shut? Upon the tilt. Yeah. And then as you're coming in, they close. Yeah. At what point must the eyes be shut? Upon the dock. Definitely tongue.

Definitely tongue. Oh, you're not. It's too much. Okay, if you are listening to this and you kiss with your eyes open, you are in a very clear minority. Because we put up a poll on Instagram saying, do you kiss with your eyes

open? No. What do you do with your eyes when you kiss? Open or closed? Yes. 96% said closed. It should be higher. It should be 99.9. And just like one sort of weird person who's like, 4% having

them open. Now Annie did message saying that anyone who sees open shall get the expulsion bell. Ding, ding, ding, ding. I see it right before me. It's only on Vaughan's side of the desk. Oh God, someone's coming with a little bit of horn here. That's why I always start by kissing

the neck. What? Every time. I'd be like. You can't kiss a neck every time you're kissing. Because sometimes a kiss is a short kiss. Yeah. It's a. What are you going.

Say how's your day. How's your day. Yeah. Imagine. Hey love. Oh how are you. Yeah I'm busy. And then going straight to the neck.

It's like. What are we having sex? What's happening? No. I've just come home to say hello. Okay, someone's texting, not wide open, half open. It's weird. What do you mean half open?

Squinting. It's really cute seeing their face change and smile. Oh my God, someone texts, I will never forget my friend getting really drunk and kissing this guy maniacally with her eyes open. No, you are absolutely in the minority there. They simply must be closed. Now, yesterday I saw the police had pulled over a car

in the central city of Auckland. The lights were on. Were you walking? I was walking. Walking and gawking? Walking and gawking. Do you? I will, if I see the police have pulled someone over,

I see the police parked up somewhere down in the city, I'll always just have a nosy. You have to. And that's why I do it even when I'm driving. And that's why traffic slows. And you'll always be like, why is the traffic going so slow? And then you'll see a cop like talking to someone

and you're like, we're all gawking. Like there was this morning coming to work maybe like four or five years ago that I saw like heaps of police cars at like quarter to five. It would have been

just before 5am and I just walked down and they were getting a man out of the car with like semi-automatic weapons and I was just standing on the corner and I was like,

this is cool. Yeah, man, you see some stuff living in the central city. And then someone, a friend messaged in who's a cop and was just standing on the corner like this is cool. You see some stuff living in the central city. And then someone, a friend messaged in who's a cop was just like, you were literally in the line of fire. You could have been shot. And I was like, yeah, but that's how much I'm nosy. I want to see what's

going on. Yeah. So they pulled over this guy yesterday and they were writing they don't write tickets anymore. It must be on the phone. On an iPad. Or they were searching driver's license details or whatever. And I was like, oh, I wouldn't be giving him a ticket. Why? He had hot eyes.

Oh, like what? Like, do you remember when that guy went viral, that what's his, Jeremy, what's his face? Yes, because of those, you know how- Crystal eyes. Like beautiful bluey green eyes with brown skin. Yeah. See?

And I was thinking if I was a cop and someone had hot eyes or they were just hot, I'd just be like, I'll let you off. Especially brown skin, blue eyes, hot. Yeah, like that's a combo, right? That's like, we ain't getting ticketed. Yeah. Whereas like if you're a minger, you just expect you're getting a ticket. You're like, roll over. My looks ain't going to get me out of this. Yeah. Whereas like, if you're a minger, you just expect you're getting a ticket. You're like, roll over.

My looks ain't gonna get me out of this. Yeah. Roll over, take the ticket. Roll over, you take the ticket and you're like, that's just life being a minger.

Yeah. But like, I was like, wow, a hot person's getting a ticket. And I was like, I wouldn't be doing this. That's ridiculous.

Like, it just didn't seem fair. Blue, brown skin, light eyes. Is the winning combo. You are exempt from all charges.

That's a combo. But again, it's just another thing hot people are used to, I'm guessing, getting off tickets. Was he wearing a sunnies? Did he like flash the eyes? No, no sunnies. So the cop had full view of the eyes. Did the cop see the brown skin? I'm guessing that it wasn't working on the cop because it was a male cop Whereas maybe if it was a female cop

They'd be like god I love these eyes I can't give you a ticket Or a gay male cop would be like I can't give you a ticket Yeah you've got brown skin and bright eyes Beautiful blue eyes This is working on me Have you ever got out of a ticket? I've only had one when I've been like pulled over.

There was like a motorcycle cop hiding with a radar gun in full leathers. And he kind of just. I mean, that's hot. He pulled me over and I was like, well, I'm not getting out of this. Because again, minga. Yeah. Total dog. And that's the only time I've ever had a ticket.

That was like 10 years ago or something or 12 years ago. Yeah. I don't think I've got out of a ticket. Again though, minga. I've had a couple again. Again. Total dog. No offence, but you're a minger. Oh, total minger. I've got dark eyes, light skin.

That's the worst combination. If you were pulled over though, would you like get the girls out? I've tried. I've definitely flirted with a cop. And did it work? Yeah. Once, it's a long story. I think I've mentioned it before I was I did find myself

in the back of a police car now I hadn't done anything I was fine it was fine but something happened I was in the back of a police car and he was so attractive and once we had cleared

the fact that I hadn't done anything wrong oh my god I was a nightmare I was like so like what are you like listening to when you're driving around

So like what is it It was so bad Can you get out of the car Well I wanted to ask Has anything ever worked for you Have you got off a ticket or got an excuse

that's got you out of it Yeah, great. Like, you know, like maybe you pretended to cry. Maybe you pretended that you were about to poop yourself. Or you got the girls out. Or you just, I don't know. Maybe you batted your brown skin and bright eyes. Quickly got some makeup out when they pulled you over.

Yeah. I don't know. Gussied yourself up. Has anything ever worked to get you out of a ticket? I would love to hear this. Because seeing the guy with hot eyes yesterday, I was like, that surely, if that can't work. We're all stuffed.

We're all stuffed. Now someone texted and said they're absolutely just like absolutely upset that you've called yourself a minger. Well, I don't have like the hot blue eyes, do I? No. Well, you've got, we've got hazel eyes, eh? We've both got hazel eyes. We've both got hazel eyes.

Okay, 0800-DARLS-IT-M. We want you to call us now. You can text through 9696. What did you do to get out of a ticket? Yeah, was it an excuse or something else? Pulled a move. So you saw a hottie get out of a... No, get a speeding ticket.

I'm assuming they ran a light because they were pulled over after the traffic lights. They were getting a ticket and I was like, I wouldn't give them a ticket because of the hot eyes. Yeah. You just, you know, you've got to give hot people a pass sometimes. You have to. It's pretty privileged.

Yeah. Yeah. But we wanted to know how you got out of a ticket, whether you pulled, maybe you flashed your pretty blue eyes at them or you flashed something else on them or maybe you used an excuse. Just an excuse, yeah. Jesse, what did you say?

So with my ex-girlfriend at the time, and Nana had been in hospital for about two months. Yep. So she told the police officer that we were on our way to the hospital to see her nana. We're on our way actually to go out to dinner. Technically it was

true because her nana was in hospital. You used nana? You used nana in her ailments? Yeah. And that worked. Oh my god. Yeah, but you're going to hell aren't you? See, that wouldn't work on me.

I'd just be like, ah, this sounds like an excuse. Yeah, they'd be going to hell, aren't you? See, that wouldn't work on me. That wouldn't work on me. I'd just be like, ah, this sounds like an excuse. Yeah, they'd be like, Nana's often in hospital. They're old. That's what happens. Yeah. What are you doing? She has a medical record.

What's that noise? Sorry, Jesse, what are you doing? Are you cutting something? I'm currently at work scraping walls and taking boards off. Wait, so you just, you could have paused? I like that you didn't pause for us, that you're still. That's the guy next to me, sorry. Are you a builder?

Yeah. Okay. Oh yeah. Hayley will let you off the ticket because you're a hot trader. Yeah, I would. Yeah, is that why? I mean, well, Jesse,

what are you giving yourself out of 10? What are you? I feel like you shouldn't judge yourself. I think someone else should do it for you. Oh, fine. Send me a photo then. She does feel an affair, bro. Thanks, Jesse.

Some text messages are through. We have some Instagram responses as well. Emily says, I got out of a ticket last week because I said I was leaving the country for six months the next day. Not true. I suppose you're like, well, how am I going to pay this? Because I'm literally moving to London.

See, but I wouldn't believe that either, but it would work if you were hot. They must be hot. Oh, yeah, I'm looking at Emily hot. Okay. Brit, also from the photo, looks hot. Yeah. Well, I was not wearing a bra, and I was wearing a mini skirt, and I didn't get a ticket.

And you just, as you see the lights come on and you pull over, you just hitch up a little bit? Hitch. Make sure we're aware. Hitch, hitch. The cop asked if I was my father's son based off my last name and then just said, okay, just keep going then. Oh, and that's...

Little like parent privilege. Friends with the dad. Yeah, maybe. Shelly says my winning personality. Oh, Shelly's hot, eh? I was looking at Shelly, she's hot. Yeah, she's hot. Laura, my old boss became a cop and I was the first ex-co-worker that she pulled over

and was like, Laura. Laura. I'll let you out of this. Well, that's nice that they got on because if you didn't get on with her, she would have taken great pride in running you a ticket. Oh, yeah. Okay. We have so many texts in.

Oh, I got off a speeding ticket by simply saying I was a nurse on my way home from a night shift. Yeah. I was in my nurse's uniform, so that might have helped. I said I was a midwife and I was on my way to a mum who was crowning and they said no more questions, but I wasn't. Off to the supermarket or something. Okay. Quite a lot of boobies. Really? And they said no more questions, but I wasn't. Do what? Just off to the supermarket or something? Okay. Quite a lot of boobies.

Really? Yeah, quite a lot of boobies. Well, boobies work, don't they? Boobies do work. They're a great asset. I can't read that one. Some of these are quite naughty. I'm not proud, but 10 years ago, I like a Texas Sun.

I love, yes. I'm not proud, but 10 years ago, I like a Texas sauce. I love yeses. I'm not proud, but 10 years ago, I got pulled over for no lights on, and I also had no rego, and I cried that my mum told me she did my rego already, and I had no idea. I was 18. I think the cop was just like, what the hell? You're crazy. It left me alone. My mum did it.

A lot of nurses pulling the nurse card when they're not on alone. My mum did it. A lot of nurses pulling the nurse card when they're not on nurse duties. They deserve it. Yeah. I got pulled over for doing 60 in a 50

up the road that led to my house and I'm so ashamed I've never told anyone. 60 in a 50. I would never. Hard and criminal. Yeah.

I never told anyone but I pinched my one month old. Oh, this is why they're ashamed. They made their one year old cry. I'm so ashamed. I've never told anyone. I pinched my one month old who was already crying, hence the speed. And she cried so hard and so loud.

I just acted like a super stressed out mum and they let me off because obviously I was a new mother trying to get home to console their baby. I'm sorry. That is ruthless. Oh my god. Oh. I got pulled over for speeding. As I was pulled over, my dad

drove past and saw. So he stopped in front, came out and ripped the shit out of me in front of the cop. The cop was like, oh, okay, it's all good. He thought I'd suffered enough, so let me go. Wow, was that part of Dad's plan or he actually did want to rip them a new one? I don't know, but it

worked. Oh my God, there's so many of these. Oh, I got out of a ticket and I'm not sure why, because I'm a minger as well Now we didn't What do you mean as well? As well

Wait You can't call it It's alright when we Refer to ourselves as mingers Yeah yeah yeah But you can't say we're mingers Don't as well us Don't as well us

You stay in your minger corner Also you can't be a minger If you got out of it Yeah I'll say a lot of people A lot of women Pulling boobs and pulling tears Yeah

It seems to work You gotta use what you got Yeah. I'll say a lot of women pulling boobs and pulling tears. Yeah. It seems to work. You've got to use what you've got. I got stuck in town yesterday because I had a gig last night and I needed to be there around 7 and I finished doing all my jobs and things around 4 and then it's like traffic time to get out to my place just to turn around and come back in. So I was like, I'll just hang around town

and I had lots of work to do on my computer. So I was like, okay, I'll go and park up somewhere. Okay. And then I'll go get some dinner and then by the time I do that, it'll be time to go to this thing. Are you one of those people that parks up somewhere

and gets like a tiny drink or a tiny bit of food or just kind of hogs a cafe or a bar and restaurant and you don't really pay for anything? Well, what I thought was I'll go to this place. Now, you know this place and I don't often divulge that. I frequent. I mean, it was in the news, I believe, at the start of this year or the end of last year.

Exploiting migrant workers. Yes, yes. Now. It turns out the staff that was serving you weren't getting paid much. Yeah. I mean, I was giving my money. I don't know where it went. Yeah.

But it's a really dodgy, cheap place. Yeah. You invited me and my friend there once for drinks and I was like, really? Yeah. Yeah? And you were like yeah, they've got cheap drinks. They've got cheap wine. Again, because I don't pay, I think at the time maybe they weren't paying the staff much. See I'm benefiting from them not paying their migrant workers.

Yeah, I understand that. Which I believe now they are paying them fairly. Yeah, but who's to say? But look, I don't go there much but I was like, you know what, I'll just go there because it's quiet, there's wifi I'll be uninterrupted. Not the kind of place you'd bring out a laptop no do some work no but I just was like okay this is this is where I'm gonna go yeah and then I only ever hang out with like one friend there yeah and I was like do you know what I'll do is I'll get a bottle of wine because I

feel like a glass of wine before my gig I said I'll get a bottle of wine two I was like I feel like a glass of wine before my gig. I said I'll get a bottle of wine, two glasses, I'll text Sam and say I said I need to do some work I need some free wifi and a cheap glass of wine you know where I am and I send him a picture of the bottle. So I poured myself a glass waiting for Sam and then he just texts me back being like

oh hon I'm in Wellington so now I'm at this place where you just like now it's worse, I'm in Wellington. So now I'm at this place where you just like, now it's worse that I'm alone. Yeah. I've got a bottle of wine, two glasses, one person. And there is no one else that I would text to be like, hey, I've got this bottle of wine.

Come and join me because of where I am. Yeah. I'm surprised you didn't try to text me. But you know I would have said no. I know you would have said no, but you are a safe person in terms of judging me about my choice of location. Yeah. So I was like, well, I'll see how I go with the wine.

And I was working away. And then I was like, I had the second glass of wine. And I was like, if I have one more, this whole night's just going to turn. Yeah. And then you won't be able to drive home. Won't be able to drive home. I won't be able to do my gig. Or I'll be able to do the gig.

But I was like, I won't be able to focus. And now you just look like a sad person that's pretending that a friend's coming. I know. I do. Because the second glass of wine. Do you know, at one point I was like, maybe I should pour some wine into the empty glass and make it seem like he's left. Like, oh, my friend's left early. Oh, you just missed him seem like he's left. Yeah, yeah.

My friend's left early and. Oh, you just missed him. He was right here. Yeah, no, I'm just finishing up and I'm also going to trot off. Yeah. But no, there was an empty glass and, you know, the majority of a bottle of wine there. So it was coming to the end and I was like, well, I don't want to drink it.

I don't want to waste it. I've paid for it. Not much because they're not paying their workers. Yeah. And so I did a sneaky, I was sort of like looking because I was on this little like indoor outdoor bit. I was sort of like looking over towards

the bar and I was like, I don't reckon anyone's watching me. So as I sort of kept like, I was so sneaky, I sort of kept on like pulling the bottle like closer towards me on the laptop, closer towards me, closer towards me till it was behind, like towards me on the laptop, closer towards me, closer towards me, till it was behind, like between me and the laptop.

Yeah. And then as I closed my laptop to pack away, I slipped the bottle down at my feet. Okay. And then as I moved my bag up to put the laptop in, I just put the bottle in my bag. Now, years ago when we first started going to this place, they always made a point when they gave you your bottle of wine they'd crack it open and they'd throw the cap

to prevent you doing this. You're not allowed to do this. No. But this guy didn't. Oh, right. He just gave you the whole bottle. Yeah. So I put the cap on my little opened bottle of wine and I put it in my back and I walked away.

And I was walking away like, head down, Hayley, head down. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go. And I was like, that's it. I've nailed it. I'll pop that in the fridge when I get home. Aaron and I can enjoy it later in the week. Another time. Another time.

Then I go to this gig and it's like at a studenty bar. Right. And they do free pizzas for the students. Yeah. And then they stay for the comedy. I get there not thinking anything of it. I pull up to the gig. There's a bouncer.

Yes. I love this. Okay. And I've got a big. Is he like, why are you at this student gig? Well, I was there. He knew I was there to do comedy. Right. But he was checking everyone's bags.

But surely not yours because you're performing. But he's just like, oh, yeah. He didn't check my ID, by the way. But he was like, oh, yeah. And sort of made a gesture to peep into my bag. And I was like, oh, well, I do have a bottle of wine in there. And he was like, you can't bring that in. And I was like, oh, well, I do have a bottle of wine in there. And he was like, you can't bring that in. And I was like, no, but you don't understand.

I'm not going to drink it. I was like, I'm not going to drink it. I promise you. I was like, it's just there because it was like digging this hole was awful. So you go through all this drama for probably what is quite a cheap bottle of wine. It is. I wouldn't say the brand, but like you wouldn't buy it at the supermarket. It's just what's on the menu there when you ask for a

salve. And did you have to give it over to him? No, I said, look, I'm performing tonight and I'm popping off straight after my set. I'm not opening it. And I bought like a lemonade or something at the bar. I was like, I'm drinking the lemonade. But anyway, so it's in my fridge now. This cheap bottle of wine that honestly I

thought so hard to get. That's right. But apparently, according to global research, 8.15 is the most stressful time of the day for the majority of people. Now, you've got to think we're like getting to work or we're leaving the house. The kids are in the car. We're dropping them at school. Like we've had a stressful morning so far. Like now is crunch time.

Well, it's school holidays at the moment. So it's maybe less stressful, but still stressful. What, to be around your kids more? Yeah. No. No. Anyway, based on the fact that 8.15 is the most stressful time and maybe you are currently in this stressful time and you're listening, you're going like,

yes, that's me. We thought we would employ the soothing and calming techniques of ASMR, which has proven to reduce stress. So I've rummaged through my handbag to help you out. But also it's proven to induce sleep. So I don't know if you want people driving along ASMR-ing. If you listen to this and you start to feel sleepy, pull on over.

Okay. Pull on over. Okay, wait, do you want some calming music? Oh, yeah, give me a little background. Okay. Hello. I know it's quarter past eight in the morning and you're probably feeling really stressed right now,

but listen to the sounds that I make for you to keep you calm. Oh, Shannon likes that one. That is a hairbrush. You're rubbing your fingers along your hairbrush. I don't know. I've seen this on Instagram. Shut up. It's soothing.

That one makes me feel a little bit sick, actually. Yeah, I didn't like that one. Okay, what about this? Oh, this is nice. Don't be stressed. Oh! That was good. That was good.

Okay, that was really good. Oh, what about some of this? The influencers love this stuff, like products. Yep, Carwin's loving that. It's a deodorant. It stinks so bad, right? It's so close to my face. Oh, if that isn't soothing enough,

allow me to give you the soothing sounds of this weird bottle of potpourri we have in the studio. Oh, yeah. That's nice. That's nice. Do more rummaging. One of them's a cotton ball. Sorry. Sorry, that wasn't soothing of me to say. That's lovely.

What about, oh, hey, they do this on, have you ever seen this where they're like, hey, hi, let me do your nails. That's me filing my nails. That was good. Some products. I've got this beautiful makeup compact. Oh, yeah, the acrylic nail.

Yeah, the girlies are loving this. They're loving the ASMR. Oh, you've had acrylic nail. Yeah, the girlies are loving this. They're loving the ASMR. Oh, you've had such a hard day. Why don't you come home and zip off your fleece? This is soothing. It's kind of soothing. Oh, do you want to... Let me just leather up my hands for a massage? Is that doing it?

It's not doing it. Isn't this ASMR? ASMR? It sounds less ASMR, more something else I can't say at this time on the radio. Well, I hope that that has soothed your 815. That was great. I want more. What about tissues? What about tissues?

Oh, yeah. What about this? That could sound good. Do more, do more. Pull them out of the, when they're coming out of the box it sounds real good oh yeah oh we just stuff these back in the box afterwards oh i don't know about the fast one all right what about a bit of water? Cheers. No. Some good ones in there, though.

What about, I've got a leather sort of flagellator on my keys. No, that was crap. Hang on. No, I don't like that one as much. I hope you feel relaxed. Okay, wait, one more, one more. I've got my lanyard. I've got my relaxing lanyard and it's got a little clicky bit.

Well, I hope that's really brought you... Go back to the potpourri to finish. Yeah, I think the potpourri is really the number one. I hope this is taking you into your day with a lovely, calm energy. I've ruined the show potpourri for that. Worth it. Have a relaxing day. I'm going to stuff these used tissues back into the box. Enjoy your day. Fact of the day is next. Fact of relaxing day. I'm going to stuff these used tissues back into the box. Enjoy your day.

Fact of the day is next. Fact of the day. Oh, this is a... Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Now, Vaughn's away the next two days Yes And last night in the group chat, I said, Vaughno, old mate Vaughno Could you send through

My man, my dog, I think you called him Can you send through some fact of the days for the rest of the week? Yes. For the two days. Yes. Because he had a list. Some listeners had sent in some facts. Yeah.

And he said, absolutely. Yeah. And then just moments ago. Shannon has walked in and said, okay, here is, well, she's dropped it off. Karwin said, don't open this until you're on air. This is from Vaughn, apparently. Which I imagine is do your own work or something. Yeah, here we go.

Dear Fletch and Hayley, sorry I can't be there today to again carry the show across the finish line, but I have decided to send you a fact of the day so it remains my usual high standard of broadcast quality. Of course. He can't just do us a favour and send us a fact of the day. He has to make a song and dance about it. Oh my God, he's put in a word.

He's stitched me here. Well, as you know, it's 50th anniversary in 2024 week and today is a hand-picked quinquagenarian, especially for you. Quinquig... Which I'm assuming is a 50-year-old. Quinquagenarian, especially for you. This year, oh, Bailey's Irish Cream turns 50.

The inventor was an, oh, I love Bailey's. Of course you do. I love Bailey's. The inventor was an advertising executive called Tom Jago, who also invented Malibu, exclamation mark, exclamation mark. Imagine inventing a drink. Yum. Like, you know, one that's been around the world

and is, like, recognised around the world. Where would you go, palate-wise? Like, coconut's been done, chocolate's been done, lime's been done, elderflower's been done. Everything's been done, hasn't it? Mm. He was asked by a client to come up with a drink to represent Ireland internationally.

He thought it had to be whiskey, but what else? Research began in 1971 and soon the research team settled... This feels copy and pasted from... It does. It does seem copy and pasted. Yep. This is not the way he speaks. Research began in 1971 and soon the research team settled on whiskey and cream

and the team described it as a drink that, quote, didn't taste punishing. Facts. Look it up. I feel like he's added that bit quote, didn't taste punishing. Facts. Look it up. I feel like he's added that bit himself. That feels warm. That feels warm. The whiskey they got cheap from a distiller that was struggling financially. The cream they got cheap because there was an excess of cream

as people were turning to skim milk alternatives and they added Nesquik because it was more affordable than chocolate. Huh. However, modern Bailey's contains a cream and whiskey emulsion held together with vegetable oil. Oh, that doesn't sound yum, does it at all? There's vegetable oil in there.

Yeah. It prevents the dairy and alcohol separating during storage. It contains a cocoa extract. This is straight up Wikipedia. I know. It contains a cocoa extract for the chocolate flavour

of vanilla, herbs, sugar, and caramel. At last count Bailey's sells 28 million bottles a year. 82. What did I say? You said 28.

Oh God. I hope not. 82 million bottles a year in per one... I'm going to honour the text. At last count Bailey's No, I won't put the comma in there. At last count, Bailey's sells 82 million bottles a year

in per 160 countries. So happy 50th birthday, Bailey's. Thank you, Vaughan. So today's fact of the day on the 50th anniversary in 2024 week is that Bailey's turns 50 this year. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Dawn's not here, but Georgia is. Hello, Georgia. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley Play ZM Vaughan's not here but Georgia is

Hello Georgia You can't get rid of me, I'm like a pest eh? No you're not a pest, we like you You're like possums you know, you're a pest but you're cute I like that What? You like to call it a possum? Yeah I wouldn't swerve to run over a possum

I wouldn't swerve if a possum was on the road I'd swerve if Georgia was there. That's actually kind of sweet for you. Is that the nicest thing anyone's ever said to you? No, nicest thing I've ever said. If I was driving towards you and you were in the middle of the road, I'd swerve as well, actually. I'd swerve for you, Fletch.

I'd swerve for the whole time. It's because we wouldn't munt up your car otherwise, isn't it? Yeah, absolutely. And you'd be done with vehicular manslaughter. And, you know, nobody wants to go to prison. I don't have time. You it? Yeah, absolutely. And you'd be done with vehicular manslaughter and, you know, nobody wants to go to prison. I don't have time. You're looking well, though. Thank you. But you've been

on a bit of a journey. Honestly, look, let's just say I was a bit nervous heading away on the weekend because we went to the mountain for this big old obstacle course, which, by the way, gotta say was epic. So wait, you went to a games, some kind of CrossFit games or something. No, don't put me in that category.

No, but it does seem that kind of... It gave big CrossFit energy. It gave big CrossFit energy. If there's one thing, do not put me with the CrossFitters. No, but you technically are. You seem to have aligned with them. Aren't you? That's like, that's hectic shit.

It's so hectic. I went with a friend once, her husband was in there. Yeah. Doing the CrossFit Games. We watched this happen. It's insane. Yeah, it's actually pretty impressive, but you'd never get me doing it. It's a whole different kind of.

People watch it, they do this for fun. I watch the CrossFit Games. Same. But I have no interest in partaking in CrossFit. Do a real pull-up, you know what I mean? She says not able to do one. It's the sass. I can't even do one real one.

But so, yeah, it looked like a kind of obstacle thing. Like I've done that Tough Mudder thing where you run up the ramps and people kind of like haul you over walls and stuff. It's kind of like that when you run around the mountain stuff. There's a whole shebang. But didn't you have like a sponsorship or you had a uniform or something? Yeah, so I was part of the Under Armour team

because they're the main sponsor of the Ultimate Athlete run in the mountain. Look at that, she's got sponsorship. Wow. She's a big deal. She's a sponsored athlete. Wow. You are a sponsored athlete. Just call me Lisa Carrington. Wow. Amazing. That's wild. What's it like being in my presence, guys?

It's humbling. I don't have an athletic sponsor, you know? Yeah. No one sponsors me to not go to the gym. In fact, someone should sponsor you to not go to the gym. And they give you shoes. I think it's a wine company. They're like, we'll sponsor you.

So you went away as a whole team, a whole group. Yeah, so there was a big group of us with the Under Armour team. Went away Friday after work. And then we went straight out for dinner, which was lovely. Kind of getting to know each other. Some of us hadn't met properly before. But, so look, it was a lovely kind of Asian fusion type vibe. Beautiful.

We love Asian fusion. Gets me every time. Yeah, you just have to say Asian fusion and I'm like, I'm there. What if I told you that but you chuck in a Kiwi flair? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, sounds great. Yeah. Until the next day.

So overnight, like they somehow gave me the master bedroom as if I was an elite athlete, which is pretty amazing. Wow. She gets the master bedroom and she's a sponsored elite athlete. And she's a sponsored elite athlete And she's a sponsored elite athlete On her way to Paris 2024 Literally That's wild

That's my news I was going to tell later on You're in the Olympic team Just call me Lisa Carrington Yeah So yeah I wake up to one of the girls Like flushing the toilets

Because there was a girl's house And a guy's house So us girls are all together Was there any canoodling? Any sort of jumping between the houses? No no no everyone's married got their own little people um and so this chick's like full vomiting and then there's the toilet flushes and i was like are you guys all good it's like 4 a.m next minute they're like no i've been up since 2 a.m vomiting the both ends everything and i was like oh God, I need to go.

Like it just came all of a sudden. Toilet, probably four times before I fully woke up. Everyone was the same. One of the chicks was like, I might not be able to do this today, kind of vibe. She, throughout the obstacle course, had to take off and go to the toilet. Wait, so this was the morning you were doing the course?

We were doing the course. Because I saw photos of you and you're running away and you're like jumping up walls. I was like, she looks all good. So I was sweet by this point. So essentially we, so us girls, there was four in our house, three of us all got real crook. We all went out for breakfast

and I said to the boys, just because I'm the crass at bricky, I was like, how's everyone's bowels? Like, how are we going? And the boys were like, oh, you've got it too? And we're like, hang on. We're like, who had the power in prawn dumplings here? Who had them?

Oh, my God. You are playing with fire. Everyone who had them was no good. But the people that didn't eat them. Were sweet. And I'm like, you guys are all dramatic. Like, what's going on here? Because some dodgy seafood will do that.

And so you guys had to compete in your. CrossFit games. CrossFit games. I stopped. Call it what it is. Obstacle course with the shits. Yeah, mine had stopped, though. I think, God, touch touch wood it doesn't come back

with every run you'd be like oh my god it was a great detox before we started though I will say that oh no just gonna flush out

that extra body weight yeah not carrying it around help you over the obstacle course so how many people were sick from the food um

six of us one? Six of us. No, five of us. And it can't have been anything else? No, there's no way. Okay. Because only two people didn't have the power and prawn. And they were fine. Yeah.

See, I would nom down a power and prawn. You know how some dumplings, they kind of like puree, and then they have, so they pureed the pawa, which was mwah, and then it was a solid. I can't believe you're saying mwah mwah after you literally were up all night shitting yourself. When I've had food poisoning before, I cannot think of the food that gave it to me.

Oh, I was going to say it ruins that food going forward. Have you ever had that? Oh, for a long time. Even if you think of it, if it was pawa, I'd be like, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God,

oh my God, I can't. See, I'm ready to go back to that place but just like, have no plans the next day. Do you guys tell them? No,

see, I don't know. You've got to tell them. You've got to tell them because they might not know. It could be frozen and they need to get rid of it or something.

What if we're just sensitive to rich foods like power? Well, all six of you. No. Well, this is a question we wanted to ask this morning

in texts and calls. When did the whole group get sick? Yeah, because you hear about this at like weddings. Yes. Oh, no way. And you'd feel so bad if it was your wedding

and everyone the next day is like... Yeah. And it's the worst when everyone's staying together in like Airbnbs, like your situation. Like, that's mortifying.

Yeah. Yeah, we had this when we went to India. I went with, like, a big drama school group, and it was, like, two teachers. God, did they want you there? I don't think India wanted us there. They were like, God, what are these people doing?

These white people with their sort of quirky, you know, avant-garde theatre. No, they didn't want it. Can you guys go home? Yeah. But we, I was all good. I didn't get any food things. Okay. Even though I was totally prepared.

Everyone was like, you're going to get to India. You're going to get deli belly and all this. Yeah. But there were definitely like four out of the seven that were like. Sick. You could audibly hear like. And you're like, oh my God. The gut's gurgling.

Sometimes you just have to go straight in the shower and just get it all out. Get it all out. Georgia. You do. Did you shut down a train? She shut down a train. Wow. That poor Airbnb owner has to probably work on their bloody drainage. On their systems. Okay,

0800 DALZEN, we want to take your calls now. When has this happened to you? When did the whole group get sick? Or a large amount of like a travelling party or a group? We want to take your calls now. When has this happened to you? When did the whole group get sick? Or a large amount of a travelling party or a group? We want to know this morning when the whole group got sick. Because Georgia went away with, what, eight people at the weekend. Five ate the dumplings. One

particular dumpling. And the next day or the next overnight early wee hours of the morning. We're feeling the consequences of that. A little quick tummy bug or some bad food by the sounds of it. Yeah. So we wanted to know when the whole group got sick or when like a large group of you all got sick at the same time.

Sarah, good morning. Good morning. This was at New Year's. What happened? Yeah. Yeah, so it's the most recent New Year's just gone and I think it was potentially the second. So we'd gone through New Year's night, been great.

Yeah. Was the second. And I, in the middle of the night, woke up and I was like extremely unwell. I'm a teacher, so I've got like a pretty good immune system, but I was very, very sick. And then everyone could see the state I was in. Everyone was heading back home that day anyway, so they all kind of headed off back to Auckland early. We were down in Opotoki, which is, you know,

a fair way from Auckland. Everyone started making their way back home, and over the next few hours, we started getting text messages from everybody going, I'm sick too. Oh, no. Oh, in a car in the middle of nowhere? No.

That's hellish. Most of them got back to Auckland, fortunately, but not everybody. Oh, no. Were there some road accidents? I didn't dig too much, but I think there was, in total, there were two batches and there was about 10 or 11 people that came down with it. And we were all trying to pin it on, like,

was it something that we ate? But then there were vegetarians who got sick as well. And so we unfortunately think it was just gastro. Yeah, right. Yeah, it was pretty traumatic. Otherwise, if everyone had stayed there, we would have all been sharing like three bathrooms. Oh, no.

But at least it was the end of New Year's because there's nothing worse if it was like right before as well. Oh, my God. Amazing. Sarah, thank you for sharing. Natasha, this was workmates that all got sick. Yes, it was. Yeah, about 20 years ago,

a recruitment semi worked for one of our ladies who was leaving, and she was so super generous and kind that she arranged for a chef friend of hers to come in on the Friday and make all these beautiful nibbles for us. Oh, lovely. I love nibbles. Bubbles and champagne.

Oh, it was lovely. And then on the Saturday night, so late in the evening, started to feel unwell, and then it all just went downhill from there. Calling Ralph on the big white phone for the entire rest of the weekend. And on the Monday, I was still crook and still couldn phone for the entire rest of the weekend. And on the Monday, I was still crook and still couldn't get off the floor of the bathroom vomiting. So I rang into work to say, look, I'm really sorry. I'm sick.

I can't come in. And our receptionist said, oh, God, you've got it too. The other four have all come down with it as well. Oh, no. Oh, no. It's the nibbles. And so what was on the nibbles that caused everyone to have the shits? We think, yeah, we think maybe it was safety to give them a scallop.

Oh, yeah. We think it was the scallops, but our dear friend who had organised it all, she was adamant that it wasn't the food. There was no way it was that. Got it. Yeah, what, something else, is it? Yeah, because we had, years ago, had oysters delivered to work, and I was like, no thanks. Oh, yum. Normally I would, but I just wasn't. Yeah, and then we had years ago had oysters delivered to work, and I was like, no thanks.

Normally I would, but I just wasn't. Yeah, and then everyone that ate them. Got sick. Got sick. Vaughn got sick. Oh, no. Yeah, everybody in the office. I would have gobbled them up.

Yes, normally I would have too, but I was like, I don't know, something. Something about oysters arriving. Like a hot day as well, like a hot summer's day, and then there's oysters in like a box with ice and you're like, I don't know. I don't know about that. Keep your texts coming in 9696. Oh, 800 dials at him. So many, we'll get to those next.

When did the whole group get sick? Some of these messages are grim. Poor old Georgia is recovering from a bloody bout of spews and poos because they went away on a fitness trip and everyone got sick. That'll teach you for going away on a fitness trip. That's why I don't bother. Yeah. For fear of getting sick.

Now, we are hearing some grim stories of when the whole group got sick. Yeah, because what was it? Five out of eight of them got sick from the dinner the night before. Alana, this was your wedding. Hello, yes. So, wedding slash honeymoon, so all after the wedding. And yeah, two days later, we stayed in separate Airbnbs. But on the last night, we all stayed together at our house.

And we all departed our ways. One sister heading over to Aussie for a holiday. My nana heading back. So we're in North Island, everyone travelling back south. And, yeah, we headed away to our honeymoon. And, yeah, that 12 to 48 hours wasn't flash. Oh, mate. Where were you going on honeymoon?

Like, was it a long flight? No, no. Luckily, we just went to, like, Whangamata and things like that. Just driving. But, yeah, my sister messaged the next day after her flight to Aussie for a holiday. And she said my nephews were vomiting in the gutters after getting off the plane. Oh my gosh. So yeah, and still to this day, we don't know where it came from.

Yeah. Reba, do you reckon it was the wedding food? No, no. So it definitely wasn't. No, it was just the family that stayed with us. Oh, okay, right. So, yeah, we don't know. Like, no one went everywhere, and we ate all the same stuff,

and, yeah, it was so bizarre. Yeah, right. There is another message from someone at a wedding, and everyone got sick. At my cousin's wedding, everyone came away with either COVID, the shits or the spews. That's grim.

Do you get a discount on your catering? You'd hope so. Lana, thank you. Some more messages to finish. Listen to this. Where did you go? Eight of us went to Thailand. Went on a day trip to Phi Phi Island.

On the way back, we stopped at another island where they fed us. For the following two days, people started dropping like flies. Four of the eight were violently ill with shits and spews and bedridden. Four days later, we flew back to New Zealand. That morning, I woke up feeling dodgy. By the time we got to the airport, I started shitting through the eye of a needle and spewing. I had it coming out both ends for the entire trip back to New Zealand. So did everyone

else. While running down the aisle in the plane to the toilet, we were all stealing spew bags from every seat. Spewing in a spew bag while sitting on the toilet in the plane was an amazing experience with all of my friends banging on the door trying to get in for themselves. Great way to lose that holiday

weight though. Listen to this. A lot of, what is it, norovirus? Norovirus? Oh, yeah. We had a family bring norovirus to camping. Ten families all taken out. It was catastrophic. Their choice of words.

You just want to go home, eh? Just leave the tent. Abandon tents. We're going home. When I was younger, my family went to Fiji and all ended up with the Hershey's squirts. The Hershey's squirts. The Hershey's squirts. One toilet between five of us.

It would be. It's like when you get the Hershey's topping. You're just like, out of the bottle. When my son was nine months old, he gave us all norovirus for Christmas. We had no idea what it was when we started vomiting Christmas Eve. Oh, Christmas Eve. Thought maybe it was something we ate.

We took him to both sides of the family, despite the fact he was sick on Christmas lunch the next day because he seemed all right. He took out 14 people. We were worried we might have killed a couple of our grandparents who were in their late 80s. It was horrific, a Christmas to remember. So many families, 25 people visiting a huge family Christmas, all 25. My brother flew in from Australia, must have brought over a gastro bug.

Oh, no. His daughter spewed all over his wife that first day. Then it spread. 23 out of 25 of us got it. Horrendous. Oh, my God, contaminated water. 50 people plus at my uncle's wedding. Oh. Horrendous. Oh, my God. Contaminated water. 50 people plus at my uncle's wedding. Oh.

Beautiful day otherwise. Beautiful day until the shit. Lovely day. Oh, another podcast in the bag. The plastic bag. Are they back? No, no. Still banned.

Okay. They never left. That's where you come in with the line, boy. Boy, man, if you enjoyed that. Okay. Oh, and if you enjoyed it, give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell all of your friends. God, I need some sleep.

Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.