ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 18th April 2023

Episode Date: April 17, 2023

Influencers at Coachella  Top 6: Small Classes  Silly Little Poll!  OTT Weddings  1/10 do this in the Shower  Hayley couldn't Sleep  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch, Fawn and Hayley Big Pod. Treat yourself to McCafe coffee with my Macca's rewards. Good morning, welcome to the show, Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. I've just had breakfast and then Sam mentions the toasty competition. Oh my god, yum. How good's a toasty? Every now and then we'll go to the local, what would you call the Hua Pai tavern?

The tavern. Oh, dude, the tab. It rules. The tab. And every now and then, like, you want to get a burger or fish and chips, and they do toasties? And I'm like, I'm just going to have a toastie. Yeah, caught up in the buzz of a toastie. I think these toasties are, you know, more of your Reuben style. Oh, I mean, I'll also do a fancy

toastie. But sometimes just some white bread or some ploughman's bread. That's my contract up. What about white ploughman's bread? White ploughman's, some rustic white ploughman's. Cheese, ham, onion. And you know what? I'll shove a pineapple in there.

I'll shove a pineapple in there. Wow, that's wild. I'm going to have to have a toasty today. Yeah, I know. Look what we've done. It's been a while since I've had a toasty. Yeah, same. Too long between toasties.

We never go out for breakfast. But the other day we went out for breakfast. Yeah. I thought you meant we as a trio. Oh, we go out for breakfast quite a few times. The weekend breakfast, we decided to go out. Oh, wow. Okay.

On Sunday for Sunday breakfast. And one of my daughters got a toasty and I was like, oh. But then I finished mine and I was like, oh. But then I finished mine and I was like, I would like a bite of that. Envy. Boom envy. I would like a bite

of that toasty, please. We've got Lizzo tickets up for grabs again today about quarter past twenty past seven. Silly little poll on the way. Should you have to

reset your driver's licence when you renew your licence every ten years? Like, do the road rule test. I've forgotten the road rules, so that wouldn't be helpful. You just kind of know them, right? Yeah, like put it. Would you back yourself? Because a few places in Australia and

it's kind of been in the news the last week talking about doing this. Yeah. Just to refresh people, because you know you get to 50, 60 and you might not have done the road test since like you were, I don't know, 16, 17? Absolutely. Old people should have to.

There should be like... I think you get to a certain age where you do, eh? It's more regular? Yeah, I don't know. Because maybe with retirement or with the pension comes like, alright, you're 65 now, let's make sure you can say some te reo Māori. She's going to see my

mum soon. Now my mum's 65, She's going to see my mum soon. Now my mum's 65. She's going to bloody have a go at her. She'll have it. For saying that. Who gives way? Who gives way? Yeah, who has the right of way? Bev.

Bev just pins it. She plays the age-old role first at the intersections. Throw in the Demio. She's very sensible. No, she's got the hybrid now. Oh, that's right. The red, whatever that is. What does she get?

It's a red hybrid. She's saving so much fuel. A Ford? Or a... Oh, I don't know. The red, whatever that is. What did she get? It's a red hybrid. She's saving so much fuel. A Ford or a... Oh, I don't know. I think it was a Toyota. But you can't... Reliable. Do you know what I mean? Toyota. Great car. Are you allowed to say that being an Audi ambassador? Two very

different price tags on a Toyota versus an Audi. Yeah, we'll see how the nation voted soon in Silly Little Pole. The top six is on the way, the government announcing yesterday. Yeah, they think we need smaller classes. Now, I am a mouthpiece for the left, as I have often been accused, but this just sounds like election year bullshit to me. Also, don't we need more teachers and more classrooms?

Yeah, we're struggling to keep the ones we've got in an already overcrowded education system but sure let's make them smaller so wait yeah if you had smaller class sizes you need more teachers

yes and more classrooms because don't they do that like group learning now some schools and areas if they're building

new buildings do that open area three teachers to 60 kids which is just looks like chaos yeah well are the top six coming up dealing with this soon?

The top six bad things about small classrooms. Because it's not all good stuff. With a better teacher to student ratio. Next on the show, another way to make some money with a side hustle similar to Uber. Oh, I've always thought I'd enjoy being an Uber driver. Very chatty. You'd be too chatty. Too chatty.

Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Chance for people to earn a bit of extra cash. Side hustling. Much like Uber. Uber for drones. Aerologic launches in New Zealand. Aerologics. So what would you use it for?

XS. Also, people post jobs like they might want one of those sweeping vistas at a wedding. I could do that. And then you could do, well, you've got a drone. I just got a redroned. Has it got a nice camera on it? Yeah, it's got a little, if you put the little memory card on it, it's got a 4K. Oh, you could do a 4K sweeping wedding shot.

Do you remember my last drone had, you might not, but on the remote it had sports mode or like safe mode. Sports modes for like qualified. So safe mode was fun because you'd be flying and it'd be like beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, too close to things, like trees. I'm panicking. And sports mode was just like,

like full noise. So this one Doesn't have the safety Oh So you have to be good At flying So I have to be more careful Right

Because don't you Oh well some You gotta get a licence A drone pilot Yeah And to like Fly in certain areas You've gotta get

Yeah some areas You can't fly near Runways for example Airports You can't fly near Tane Mahuta, the big kauri tree either. That's fair enough. Why not? Because it's...

Drones are natural carriers of kauri dobek. Or you could crash it in and burn the whole tree down. I also think just when you visit the tree, it's a very beautiful forest and it was like... the whole time. Yeah. And you can actually allow them in any national park. Yeah, get out.

I believe. I believe. Well, Uber for Drones, this new company, says that pilots on its books are earning in Australia, because they've just launched here, but they've been in Australia a while, they're earning 80 to 150 Australian an hour. Yeah, that's good.

Depending on the type of work. So they take 30%. And yeah, it could be anything from taking footage of a wedding or kind of, you know, builders might want a thing of the construction site. Right, yeah, yeah. Farmers might want to get a... Real estate agents. Yeah, real estate agents.

A sweeping shot that they can add to the listing video. Oh, yeah, we got one of those. All kinds. So you can see the whole property and the house from the birds eye of you. Yeah. Huh. That's in case you want to sell it to a bird or a bird person. We sold our last house to birds.

Yeah. They arrived via the air so they want to see what it looks like. They paid way too much. Yeah, stupid birds. They paid way too much. It's so big for birds. That was a too bitty. Well, chickens now, of course, they're flush with cash in these economic times because the eggs are so expensive.

Yeah, I know. They're the king makers. If you're looking to sell your house, maybe chickens is an option. Shoot. You've got a lovely

area for egg laying. Can you... Into red or flow. Can you drone my house? I could drone you. Oh, you'd drone me construction. Yeah, totally.

With the framing up and all that. I saw you put a picture up yesterday. It's massive. Yeah. And then you put the footage up and all that. I saw you put a picture up yesterday. It's massive. Yeah. And then you put the footage up and someone will be like, it's actually illegal to fly a drone there.

Or you are quite close to the Air Force base. Yeah, we are quite close to the Air Force. They should be ready. If anyone should be ready for drones, it should be the Air Force. I mean, it's going to give them a bit of practice. No, you wouldn't go that high. If they go into bloody Ukraine or wherever. Yeah. Yeah. Because I'll have drones. of practice. No, you wouldn't go that high. If they go into bloody Ukraine or wherever. Yeah.

Yeah. Because I'll have drones. Yeah. We should do it when my roof is off. And then do it before and after. Do it before and after. Yeah, and then put the roof back on. Yeah.

This is great. How high are you? I don't want to pay $100 an hour, though. I'm very expensive. Free. Vaughan's free. Is he? Very expensive.

You see those people who are really good at drones, they'll be able to fly through you, race through your house. Oh, yeah, they would be able to fly through your race, through your house. Oh, yeah, they would be able to. No, we've got antiques and all sorts of vintage goods in there. They can fly around the knick-knacks. I don't want you flying into my knick-knacks. They can fly around your knick-knacks. When was the last time you had a drone operator fly around your knick-knacks?

Ooh. Buzzing your knick-knacks. 13 past 6. Get out of my knick-knacks. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Can we please, sir, cross over to the cool young girls at the social media desk and the producer's desk? Because I'm going to need to know who Lauren Gray is

and whether or not she's relevant. Yeah, she's like quite big on TikTok. Okay. She's a little young for me. Yeah. Yeah. You only like your older girls, don't you? Looks like a real...

She likes the old birds. Half your age plus seven, isn't it? She's a real... What's the actress? Maggie. Maggie Smith. She's a real Maggie Smith girl. Oh, she loves the older girls.

Helen Mirren. Jane... Judy. What is it? Jane... Dame Judy Dench. Dame Judy Dench. I'm confused because they call Lauren Gray a veteran influencer

and then they say the 20-year-old and I was like, sorry, wait, wait, wait. Yeah, she's one of those girls that really started quite young. Right. Doing the little TikTok dances. She was back on Musical.ly days before it was TikTok. Musical.ly? Yeah. Wow.

Okay. Well, anyway, she's a 10 out of 10 I'm gonna say that Yeah And she has shared On her TikTok There is a ridiculous truth About influencers

Going to Coachella Now There's so many things Popping up recently Of like Get ready with me For day one of Coachella And it's like

I'm wearing Beads on my nipples And that's it Or like I'm wearing a mesh Oh well I know That spoils. Or like, I'm wearing a mesh onesie. Oh, well, no, that spoils my outfit. Oh, God, I'm sorry I said it out loud. It was going to be so exciting next year.

Yeah, I know. You'd only need one bead, Fletch, of those tiny nips of yours. I don't even think I could attach anything to my nips to wear a little bead. They're not a rough enough surface. So anyway, she said basically a lot of, because a lot of like big influencers will get a whole bunch of brands

giving them clothing to wear, handbags, accessories, and they'll say, can you please take photos of you in this at Coachella or like get ready with me for Coachella. And then influencers realise that they can make that money and not go to Coachella by just going, like driving somewhere Coachella-esque, a park or a

desert. Anywhere in LA. If you're in LA, desert and trees. Yeah. And just taking photos there, being like, get ready for me, get ready with me, go to Coachella. And then they don't go. They just take photos and then upload it. That is wild. And then they're like, day two, feeling dusty

but ready to go, day two, Coachella. They didn't even go, they didn't even leave the house. And then they never post any day two, feeling dusty, but ready to go, day two, Coachella. They didn't even go. They didn't even leave the house. And then they never post any footage of concerts or anyone on stage. They'll take a photo of them in a park like this and they'll be holding like a solo cup of water probably. Yeah.

And they're like, Coachella with some peace signs. Why didn't they want to go to Coachella? I guess if you couldn't afford it or if it was too far away or you didn't want to go to the line-up. Oh, okay. She said if you feel boring and sad because you're not at Coachella, just know that most of these people aren't either. Isn't that

why? I didn't even think. She said it's a very, very common occurrence. And she said, I thought everyone knew. Well, it would be a giveaway because, I mean, unless they were ripping footage from their friends and uploading it. Yeah. Otherwise, you'd know because they'd never post anything actually at Coachella. Yeah. She was like, it's just, they're just trying to save time and money

and get free stuff by saying to these big brands, I'm at Coachella and you can, you know. And then go home, take off their beaded nipple cover and then just flop on the couch and. How nice. And then they have like a free bag. Yeah. Free handbag. And enough money to buy pizzas

and just eat six pizzas. My god. I would rather be on the couch in my Jim Jams eating six pizzas than at Coachella any day. It looks awful. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley from the Panoramic ZM Think Tank.

This is the top six. Well, howdy, y'all. Oh, howdy. Howdy. This is the headline. Labor aims to reduce class sizes for year four to eight students, 320 extra teachers. How many schools are there?

There's not even one extra teacher per school, is it? Yeah. Not even that. There'd be heaps. And you've got to get classrooms. Are we talking prefabs? I know what I'm talking about. My school was all prefabs.

A lot of prefabs. We had a lot of prefabs too. And they never had air con. No shit. No, no, no. A lot of prefabs. We had a lot of prefabs too. And they never had air con. No shit. No, no, no. They were cold as anything. Yeah, no air con. In summer,

it was a hot house. Yep. And in winter, it was an icebox. This is, I don't know, Hayley, if you know, this is called

a low decile school. I was going to say my school was in a heritage protected villa, so I don't. Okay. You don't understand. Seriously was. We had so many, I'm just thinking Okay. You don't understand. Seriously was.

We had so many pre... I'm just thinking about... We had A and B and C block, but then there was a prefab there, a prefab there. One, two, three, four. Are you talking about in primary school? No, high school.

Oh, it's a prefab. On intermediate, it was just long old blocks of... Yeah, intermediate was long prefabs. And they kind of joined together. Yeah, yeah. we had that at Intermedia. They joined a few prefabs. Oh, God, prefabs. Prefabs.

I mean, it's a great idea because kids learn more, don't they, when there are less kids in the class? Yeah, you've only got so much room. I was going to say, they learn more when they're a bit cold. Keeps them on their toes and they're freezing.

Yeah. Or sweltering. But in a time when we're all struggling to find teachers and keep teachers, it does seem a bit odd. How are we going to find more? Yeah. Pay them more? Absolutely not.

Absolutely not. Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry. Ignore me. This is expected to cost $106 million over five years. Just for the record, I think teachers should be paid more. That was a sarcastic... Oh, no, I do too, but I thought we were just saying that seems to be anybody's answer to how we're going to fix the situation.

Should we pay more? Absolutely not. Or, you know what we should do? We should pay teachers more. Okay, we'll have to put taxes up. Absolutely not. We can't do that. Absolutely not. So schools or smaller roles that operate below the 1 to 28 ratio wouldn't see any change to class sizes. Who's rocking more than that poor teacher

dealing with more than outnumbered 28 to 1? Holy. No wonder they bloody lash out every now and again. Yeah, they should sit on seats and the seats should all be jacked up to little electric shocks and they should be sitting at their desk and like 13. Is that you? Is it? I love that idea.

Yeah. That's a great idea. Little electric shocks. Not enough to do any damage, but you know, certainly get their attention. And then if they're going to hover out of the chair, you're developing children with great quad strength. Yes. It's like they're doing squats all class long.

Well, I've got the top six bad things about small classrooms, because it's not all good. Okay. Number six on the list, less people to blame a rogue fart on. Yeah. Maybe you'd fart, you'd be like, that's going to stink. You'd be like, oh, poo! Jason! Jason, oh, poo!

Jason did a fart, everybody. Immediately get Jason on the back foot. It was always worn though, wasn't it? Poor Jason. More often than not. Number five on the list of the top was always worn though, wasn't it? Poor Jason. More often than not. Number five on the list of the top six bad things about small classrooms. Less people to swap your yuck lunch with. Oh, yeah.

When you go to a bigger classroom, you can kind of get to know a few more kids' cuisine tastes. Maybe their parents are bougie buying them a field roll on the way to school, but they just want, you know, a muffin and a homemade muffin and a sandwich. Yeah. Swapsies. Number four on the list of the top six bad things about small classrooms. Less kids to steal the good art from. You know when it's art project time and you're like, man, I suck at this.

But if you're like, I might just grab that kid. I did that. Did that art yesterday, but they're away today. I'll take it. Yes. My man, look what I did. I'm so clever. I'm a great artist, but I don't think I could ever do it again.

You remember Kim Kardashian's kid that painted that bloody... Oh, yeah. That was insane. I mean, I'm just saying like some of that printing war where you cut a bit of line on it and put a bit of ink on it and roll it on. I'm not talking about painting a beautiful Bob Ross landscape. Number three on the list of the top six bad things about small classrooms.

Way harder to prank the teacher when she knows you all just that little bit better. He or she knows you just that little bit better. Number two on the list of the top six bad things about small classrooms.

Way less people to go around with. And you know, you only go around with them for like two days and then you break up with them. So you'll probably get through the whole class in term one.

Hold hands though. Yeah. Hold hands at lunchtime until the teacher's like, hey you two. And you're like at lunchtime. Yeah, yeah. Until the teacher's like, hey you two. And you're like, oh nothing. What's my boyfriend?

And number one on the list of the top six bad things about small classrooms. Less people to borrow a pen and some refill from. Yeah. Can I have a sheet of refill? When you ran out of refill.

Yes. Can I borrow a sheet of refill? Yeah, the teacher's like, where's your box? I forgot I packed my bag for the wrong day of class. Yeah. Can I borrow a pen and some refill?, the teacher's like, where's your box? I forgot, I packed my bag for the wrong day of class. Yeah. Miss, can I borrow a pen and some refill?

Can I get some refill paper? Yeah. And it was always the kid that you knew was going to break your pen that was like, Can I borrow a pen? Oh, yeah, pushes down too hard. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Quindowd, you can't borrow my pen. You've disrespected. Quind, oh.

Yeah, you've disrespected my pencil case multiple occasions and I shan't be fooled again. Do you get a rip curl wetsuit? You're damn right I do. Yeah, good stuff. You're damn right. It's got to be you. Yeah. I want my pen sweaty in that pre-fab.

Yes. I want it hot. I want it sweaty. That's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Do you ever look at influencers and they've got... Oh, we know you do. I know your Instagram algorithm.

And you just sort of wonder, like, they sort of get more followers and then they start wearing, like, designer clothing and they've got Louis Vuitton handbags now and they've got a car and then they buy a fancy house and you're like, how do you make that money? But it's all, like, it's all smoke and mirrors. A lot of it is, yeah. It'll be like a leased Mercedes or a sponsored Mercedes.

Oh my God, how embarrassing to not own your luxury vehicle. Wow. Just be driving one. Yeah. It's all smoke and mirrors. Totally it is. Don't worry about them. Well, there is a new website that has created a social salary

and it allows you to kind of work out how many followers you would need on each platform in order to make some money. So as an example of this, they worked out how many followers you need on YouTube, Instagram and TikTok to generate $100,000 from each. Okay. So on YouTube, according to the calculator, and they did this based on some analytical thingy of the thing.

Okay. That's great. Can we get you to talk about the company's upcoming social media? It would have been my honour. Yeah, social media. Thank you. TED Talk. Oh, well. We're going to have a panel of experts. People really? It would have been my honour. Yeah, social media. Thank you. TED Talk. I will.

We're going to have a panel of experts. People really want to know how the analytics work. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you now. And I mean, you just totally. They use data from Influencer Marketing Hub's YouTube money calculator, Creator Agency 76's influencer pricing report,

like if your agent has, like, here's what it costs for a post, and Influencer Branding Platform's social publis blog post on how many followers you need. report, like if your agent has here's what it costs for a post, and influencer branding platform social publish blog post on how many followers you need. Anyway, so YouTube, according to this calculator, you need a minimum of 1,000 YouTube subscribers. Is that why everyone's always like like and subscribe and a year?

But 1,000 is like nothing on YouTube. Like if you look at some YouTube channels. Did you say 100,000? 100,000 subscribers. Yeah. Sorry, no, no, no, no. 1,000 subscribers. Ah.

But 24 million yearly views. To make 100,000 US. Yeah, so if you didn't have subscribers, but you had some really viral videos. Yeah. That had just popped off, then that's what you would need to be able to generate $100,000.

So you've got to enroll in the YouTube's partner program, basically like a professional YouTube channel. Allows you to make money through the ads on your videos. And in order to join that program, you have to have 1,000 subscribers and hit that amount of views.

On Instagram, you need a minimum of 5,000 Instagram followers. Now we would have all crossed over that line. Yeah, just. Just a little bit. But you need 308 sponsored posts

a year. Could be bothered. That's two a day. Who's following someone that has that many posts? How many days do you think are in the year? 365. How many days do you think are in the year? 365. Yeah. How many days do you think are in the year?

So if you had 308, it's not two a day. Oh, you said 308. Yeah. Oh, I do apologize. For some reason, I thought you said 708. And I was like, two a day. 308 sponsored posts a day. So you don't even get every weekend off? No.

You get one day a week off. And who's following you if you're posting that much crap? It's got to be good sponsored content if you're posting that much. Or you've got to be really hot to get away. Oh, super hot. And you've got to be promoting things like knickers. Yeah. I have to go the hot route, I think.

And apparently, if you had over a million followers on Instagram, typically you could make more than $250,000 per post from brands. So if you think about Kim Kardashian promoting teeth whitening, they would have paid up the wazoo for that. Oh, hell yes. But then they'll see that back. And then they would have got that money back because we buy whatever she buys.

And the final one is TikTok. You need a minimum of 10. I don't. I actively buy things that she has not. You buy the antithesis of it. You buy teeth stainer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I drink extra coffee.

You need a minimum of 10,000 TikTok subscribers and over 270 million views a year, which sounds crazy, but on TikTok that happens. How many, how's your TikTok career going? I'm just having a look because I did do a hard launch of my TikTok channel.

You did. And then how many videos have you done? Well, just the same amount as when I first started it. Three. Two. Two, three maybe?

How many? Don't allow. I haven't even opened it in so long. How do I find my profile? It's not going well. Three videos. I have 1,500 followers.

So I'm a little short of the 10,000. And collectively I would have had maybe like 10, 20, 30, 40, say 50,000 views. Still short. Still short of the 270 million. So you've got a long way to go I mean you've started 100,000

Yeah Every Journey Starts with a single step Put that on TikTok Put that on a bloody t-shirt And I'll wear it every day To remind myself

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Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah Play. ZDM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Queensland drivers could be forced to reset their driver's licences when they go to renew their licence under a raft of new changes being proposed. So how would you feel about that? Having to do your... They don't do scratchy tests anymore, eh?

No, it's all online. It's all online. You sit at the computer or the iPad, yeah. They don't do scratchy tests anymore, eh? No, it's all online. It's all online. It's on your iPad or something, right? Yeah, sit at the computer or the iPad, yeah. I would feel better if other people on the road had to do it because that's the thing. On the road, my mum used to always say to me, it's not you I'm worried about, it's everyone else.

It's you I'm a little bit worried about. She should be worried about you. Well, that was before she knew how I drove. Right, yeah, you can't trust anybody out there. Matt, when I did that, when I drove to New Plymouth, was it last Easter weekend? There was some,

you know, like, absolute overtaking on blind corners. Dude, it's the overtaking every time. I go, and like, yeah, same,

and I'm going, and there's like another car coming, you're like, dude, get in. I just like, I'll brake heavily. If someone's overtaking,

someone's coming the other way, I'm just like, this is too much for me. It's too much. It's horrible. I just like, I'll break heavily. If someone's overtaking, someone's coming the other way, I'm just like, this is too much for me. It's too much. It's horrible. I don't want to be hit. I don't want to be involved. I don't want to be involved in this. I don't want to be close to it when it happens. I don't want to see it.

No. I don't want to see it. It's not going to be pretty. It freaks me out. I'll like break and like pull over. It's so bad. Stop it. Stop overtaking.

I don't know if making people reset their licence is going to fix that. That's just idiots, isn't it? Yeah. Should you have to reset the road rules every time you renew your licence? Yes, 46%. No way, 54%. Close. I thought it would be a lot more.

No. I think if it's just doing the road rules, people would be more likely to do it. But if you had to book in and then, you know how hard it is to book in to sit a licence, a driver's licence test anyway. They wouldn't be able to. Add everybody back into the system to be doing that every time they need to renew their licence.

Like it blew my mind when I renewed my licence at AA. I went in and there was like a line of people renewing their licence. Yeah, same. You should be able to do that online, right? Oh, but you have to do the eye test. New photo and the eye test. Yeah, of course. Yeah. God, I wish I had got like a professional of people renewing their license. Yeah, same. You should be able to do that online, right? Oh, but you have to do the eye test. New photo and the eye test. Yeah, of course. Yeah.

God, I wish I had got like a professional photo done. The guy did not. He gave me one take wonder. It's not on. I've got to live with that for so long now. Yeah. It's tough. Yeah.

Don't get too caught up on these things. It's fine. Daryl says, I'm very aware of my lack of awareness of the rules and find myself sometimes looking them up. So yes, it would be a good idea. Daryl's looking them up. What's he... What does he stop in the middle of the road?

And he's like, oh, actually, I don't know who's supposed to go here first. Left, right. What annoys me is when you get to a place where you have to give way to somebody, they'll stop where they don't should stop and they'll wait here. It's like, no.

Just follow the rules and it all works out, man. If we all do the rules, it's okay. They've already figured this out for us. We don't need to be making up our own ones. We're not the sheriffs. Libby says, hell no, I just renewed my licence today and the stress of passing the eye test, making my signature look half decent,

and my photo look like me was enough. The stress when you get a new bank card or something and you have to sign in that tiny little strip. I know, with a pen and you're like, it's all slippery. You're like, ah! The worst is when you don't sign it when you first get it and you're at the supermarket or something and they're like, oh, you haven't signed this.

Could you sign it? And you're like, not here. Oh my God, don't even get me started about when I had a gift card and I just scribbled anything. And she's like, it's not the same as that gift card. I was like, there's nothing on the gift card. She's like, I can't accept this. I was like.

Yes, you can. Yes, you can. Yes, you can. Oh, God. Gemma writes, yes, but let's be honest, what an absolute pain in the ass it would be. And what if you didn't pass and you've been driving for yonks? What, you just stopped driving? Yeah, like you would.

It did have to be a grace period. Brianne says, yes to road rules, but no to practical drives. A written test would be great. Go in, do your eye test, you know, scratch or tick a few boxes. Especially a test filled with forgotten rules

or any that have recently changed. Imagine having to redo your practical and having your hands at 10 and 2. 10 and 2, and I'm pointing out there's a man coming out the driveway, so I'm just keeping aware of him at all times. There's a dog running

onto the road. Some support slowing down to be conscious of the dog. There's people like oh you didn't I failed because I didn't name enough hazards. That was me.

Anything can be a hazard. Yeah. That lamppost could fall on you. I'm wearing a very tight pair of underwear it's very distracting. Exactly.

A SpaceX satellite could fall from the sky onto you. And then your response was always so I'm just remaining aware of that and just keeping an eye out for that. Yeah. And if it was raining,

but it's not, but if it was, the road would be slippery. And if I was doing this at the end of the day, which I'm not, but if I was, sunstrike. Yeah. So I'm just remaining aware of that. And Victoria said, no thanks, because I would 100% fail. It took me a lot of times

to get this done. And I don't need to be doing it every 10 years. I thought the motorway speed limit was 80 miles an hour, so I went 90 miles an hour. Turns out it was only 70 miles an hour. So 90 miles an hour is like 100... I know, that's fast. 40k's an hour?

Because when you're in America and you're driving and it's 65, that's what, about 110-ish? 110, yeah. Yeah, I love a 110. I 110-ish. Yeah, fun. Yeah, I love a 110. I love a 110. Yeah, the Waikato Expressway. Yeah, 110. Oh, how good's a 110?

110 is good. Oh, I love a 110. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. There is a woman who is self-proclaimed opera mad. She loves the opera. Okay. And she was getting married to none other than Opera Australia's Head of Music.

Oh. I know. It feels like she sort of was taking an opportunity there. Feels like she's a groupie. Yeah, a little bit. Is that how they met? An opera groupie. Yeah.

God, they go crazy. They do. It's the hardest part is throwing your panties over the orchestra pit. Yeah, because sometimes they land in the pit. In the pit. It's like, it's not for you, cellist. I threw my panties and it went in the orchestra pit. Yeah, because sometimes they land in the pit. It's like, it's not for you, cellist. I threw my panties away in the tuba. Yeah.

And then that... Clogged it up. Clogged it up. The orchestra gets wild, doesn't it? In the orchestra pit. It goes down in the orchestra pit, right? So the head of music for Opera Australia, the gentleman, he said he'd arranged for some soft, elegant slow music

for his wife's walk down the aisle. He was stood at the end of the aisle as part of the Sydney Harbour where there was a production of Madame Butterfly currently. And then he said, he was like, where is she? Suddenly, right... I was just going to email. He got an email. Suddenly he got an email.

And he bailed. Suddenly, Ride of the Valkyries plays instead of the gentle wedding music. Okay. This isn't wedding music. This is like... No, this is like doom and gloom. Off the wall we go. And then a crane starts swinging in and lowers down like a cage with the bride and her bridesmaids in it. And this is how she chooses to arrive for the wedding.

Look at the photo of this. It's like Sydney Harbour. And they went so high. Oh, I know. It's a huckery. The crane's like, it's like a construction crane. Yeah. And they're coming in in like a box that you always see hanging underneath them.

So the crane is usually used to move large set pieces for the opera. Right. And she was like, I'm going to arrive. I'm going to arrive in this to ride in the Valkyries. So she's, imagine this, and she's being lowered in. Like from four or five stories high. They have decorated the box, so it doesn't look like a construction. Pretty poorly.

I'll say it looks tacky. White sheets and a bit of red ribbon. And a bit of satin sash. Anyway, she lowers down right by his feet and comes out, and he's like, what the hell? They love the opera. They love the opera of life. I'm going to walk down the aisle too.

I don't know about that. He was absolutely gobsmacked. He didn't know it all. She'd organise this. This is so next level. Brides. It's a bit over the top. It's not all about you. It's like people that helicopter into their weddings. It's like calm down.

Calm down. Get yourself a vintage car and then just do it. Just have a nice vintage car. Just a Prius. Oh, absolutely. Sensible. Sensible. Hybrid. Yeah. Audi, whatever. Just working one.

Couple of last mentions in there. Yeah, I've got to give it back next week. So I wanted to know if you've ever, what is the most over-the-top wedding thing you've ever seen? Maybe it was something you did for your wedding that was over-the-top. Maybe you did, you know, getting a chopper to arrive here. Getting down to the chopper.

To get to your own wedding. Or were you at a wedding where just probably the bride just did something so over-the-top. Yeah, I want to hear these stories. You almost can't help but cringe or laugh or just go, oh my God, she's so extra. We are wanting to know the most over the top thing you've seen at a wedding.

Or if you would admit that you did something very OTT at your own wedding. Because there is an opera fan who like craned in to a very dramatic tune to her own wedding. Which was used, for some reason it always reminds me of helicopters. It's because it was used in Apocalypse. Was it Apocalypse Now? Yes.

It was used in an ad for some kind of fly spray or cleaning bathroom agent. Do you know what? I actually think you're right. I think you're right too. I think you're right too. Yes. I think you're right too. And in Fortnite, a while ago there were helicopters and you could press a button

when you were in the Fortnite helicopter and it would play it out there. Yes. Probably because it's royalty free, right? Because it's so old. It's old. You guys will remember in 2013 at the Edinburgh Royal Military Tattoo

that Lockheel marched to that tune as well, of course. Of course. One of your favourite performances I know you watch it often. Of course. Yeah. Anyway, it was so over the top

that you can't stop watching. I can't forget, yeah. She craned into her own wedding. We want to know what's the most over the top thing you've seen at a wedding is. Holly, good morning. Good morning.

Now, what's the most over the top thing you've seen at a wedding? So this was like an African, East African wedding in the Indian Ocean. Beautiful, beautiful setting. Okay,

so we've got white sandy beach, beautiful blue ocean. And normal weddings, you rock up as a guest and you can see the groom,

you can see his best man and you're saying hi before you take your seat. He was nowhere to be seen. Uh-oh.

An aeroplane over the water and he parachutes in his car. Oh! That's so risky. James Bond. That's amazing. And perfect landing. No, that's what I was going to say. That's what I was going to say is the landing is often so clunky and awkward.

Like your bum sort of scraping along the ground. But I'm imagining he was very good at this. Like that was his job? Wow. He pulled it off. Wow. Was it solo? It wasn't his job.

But he was solo parachuting? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so he'd done it before. But imagine if the parachute wasn't packed and he just plummeted onto the... Or your friends and family just watch you die. Yeah. Cool day.

Cool day. Oh, my God. Wow. I actually kind of like that. Into his wedding. Yeah. So did he... Was he wearing...

Unexpected. Did he have a suit underneath his... Did he get rid of the buckles? Yeah. He then took it all off and he was in his full on tux ready to go. It'll be crinkled. It'll be crinkled. Yeah.

You need a lint roller too, I reckon. It'll be crinkled. It'll be crinkled. Yeah, you'd need a lint roller too, I reckon. If that was a woodland, it'll be crinkled. Your hair would need a zhuzh. Yeah. Holly, thank you for your call. Need a little bit of a comb. Jeremy, what was the most over-the-top thing you saw at a wedding? It was actually my wedding last week.

Oh, wow. Congratulations. Congratulations. Wow, wow, wow. Let's wait and see. My husband and I decided that we wanted to add some drama to the ceremony. We were a fairly over-the-top couple, I suppose you'd say. I love that.

So we asked one of our friends to object at the relevant point. And that's the only brief we gave him. Oh, wow. Our friend took it to the next level, pulled out a bag. In the bag, he had a thumb drive. He said, this has got 15 gig of compromising photos. And we thought, yeah, whatever. Then he pulled out some fetish wear, and that was okay.

But then to go right over the top, he pulled out a very large adult toy. Yes, thank you. Well worded, well worded. About a metre and a half from my mother, but that's okay. Oh, my God. Were people loving it? It was good because it set the tone of the wedding and sort of the reception as well.

But you normally see lots of people crying at weddings. People just laugh and laugh. That sounds so much fun. That's so good. Somebody did jokingly object at your wedding or coughed, didn't they? They coughed. That wasn't funny. Did the fear of God run through you?

No. Jeremy, thank you. The eyes of the rolly eyes of Jesus did. Lisa, what was the most over the top thing you saw at a wedding? I didn't actually see it,

I was part of it. Yeah. Okay. So, I was a bridesmaid and there were three of us in the bridal paddy. My good friend,

who was a bride, who was all decked out in this beautiful princess ball gown and all that sort of stuff. We got dropped off in a big waka. So, yeah, paddled the full length of Lake Rotorua with a huge crew. All of the crew, of course, in high zers and shorts and t-shirt, you know, and they're wearing life jackets, of course. Wait, did you have to do any of the paddling, though?

Yeah, that's what I was going to say. Did the bride make you paddle the waka? No, not at all. Thank God, yeah. Right. I'm just concentrating on not drowning, really. Again, that could go so wrong. That's so extra, though, isn't it?

And so did... It was stunning, actually. It actually made a really great... It was amazing. Yeah. I think we're in, you know a really great, it was amazing. Yeah. I think we're in, you know, about a thousand tourist photos. Yeah. You will be, too.

I bet. And what was it like, did you get off at a wharf or a jetty? Yeah, there's like a yacht club that's kind of down. Oh, perfect. Right. I thought you'd sort of run aground. Yeah, run aground and then just paddle as quick as you can to the shore and run aground and then step off the front.

Put your shoes on, your feet are wet, bit of sand. Lisa, thanks, you called some messages in. I flew into my wedding in a helicopter. I'm definitely not extra, but it kind of runs in our family. My dad's a pilot, my brother's a pilot, and my granddad used to be a pilot as well. It would just be weird if we turned up in a car. They're anti-car, they fly everywhere.

Yeah. I went to a wedding where taste was obviously lacking. The whole thing was a bogan mess. But the highlight of the day was the bride arriving

in a manky camper van. Anticipation was heightened as when she got out everyone could only see her shoes under the camper van until she walked around it.

Oh, I love that. That sounds nice. Yeah. We're not here to judge. Somebody else said I flew into my own wedding in a helicopter. Oh, yeah. It're not here to judge. Somebody else said I flew into my own wedding in a helicopter. Oh yeah. It was a little bit epic.

Yeah. It was a little bit over the top. If somebody else had done it, I'd be like, that's a bit over the top. I also feel like if there was ever a day to lean into being over the top, it's the wedding day. It's the wedding day. Or your funeral, but you're not there to enjoy it. Yeah, if you get helicoptered into your funeral, that's badass.

I want to get cannoned into mine. Yeah. Cannoned out of it. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. Now, I don't know when Habiba Ketcher turned up for work at the Huffington Post and the boss said, Habiba, what you got? This is how it works in journalism, run the desk. What have you got for us, Habiba Ketcher turned up for work at the Huffington Post and the boss said, Habiba, what you got? This is how it works in journalism, around the desk.

What have you got for us, Habiba? And Habiba said, probably caught on the back foot. You're scrambling about. Stats about how often British people poo in the shower. And the boss said, you've got my interest. Tell me more. Let's run a story on the Huffington Post. the shower and the boss said, you've got my interest. Tell me more. Let's run a story on the Huffington Post.

The Huffington Post ran a story that is headlined, oh good, over one in 10 people poo in the shower. No, no, no. Now this is the UK, right? These are UK statistics. So this came from water filter guru who surveyed over,000 people to shed some light on personal hygiene habits. Oh, yuck. But hang on. We don't poo in the shower.

We don't. It gets worse. How are their stats on this? It's not their common occurrence. Because they were asked a whole lot of questions. A quarter of people wash their jennies in the sink. That, to me, is more shocking, because if you're taking the time to wash them,

just get in the shower. That's on you. We can't. You have to scoop and splash, scoop and splash. How do you wash them in the shower? You put them in the shower. In the sink, you mean. In the sink, sorry.

You put them in the sink. A low sink, then you get up on a stool and lower down. Something I've never considered. No, you just use the shower. Is this if you need a quick genie refresh? I mean, I'll do a flannel. You know, I'm flannelling at the moment. If I can't have a shower, I'll do a quick little flannel.

But that's... But that's more of a sponge bath. Yeah. I wouldn't dip them in the shower. Yeah, that's grim. Okay. So why are people pooping in the shower? Well, and three in ten people, only 30% of people pee in the shower.

Oh my God. 100%. There's some people lying there. 100%. Save the water. You're already in there. You know what I mean? I would pee in the shower.

80% of showers I'm in. What about the gym? Because if there's no drain in front of you that everyone can see you've done away. I had a shower at the gym yesterday. And I did a quick left to right check.

No one else on my line should let it flow. You are disgusting. I'm not getting out. The toilet's ages away. Okay, this is why you have to wear jandals when you use the gym shower.

No, but the gym, the urine is sterile. It's, people's manky feet. And it's been flushed with water. Yeah. Okay, let's get to the stat we need to know about.

No, I didn't want to talk about more stats because this will blow your mind. Americans shower six times a week. So that's not even every day. That's not even every day. For about 15 minutes each time. Not even I take 15-minute showers. That's an insanely long shower.

I'm a long showerer. I love sitting under that hot water and I sing that Natasha Bedingfield song. Of course you do. So they use 10,000 gallons of water a year per person showering. Yikes. Gen Zers showered less. They only showered five times a week.

Boo! Darwin, that's you. Yuck. I mean, in general, I would shower every day. Are you a Gen Z-er? I think I'm technically zillennial. Shannon, what are you? Yeah, I'm a hard Z.

Eww. Are you showering five times a week? I go for a seven every day after work. Any times when you have a miss, you miss a shower? I don't think so. I feel like at the moment I'll shower three times a week. I'm going to be honest. That's loaded.

Yeah. That's disgusting. No, maybe four. Maybe four. Multitasking as well. 37% of men have confessed to video chatting while in the shower. Oh, no, you don't. The phone will get condensation.

Yeah, you don't want to end up getting your phone fixed. Women on the other hand were more likely to brush their teeth and pee in the shower. Yeah bro, I do both. Yeah, I brush my teeth in the shower so I know people are against it. So I get to spit down myself. Yeah, you can spit it and then I think it's because it all gets in the beard on the spit and then I just turn my face into the shower. Yeah, but you don't want to get a minty, tingly

toothpaste on your genitals. Well, I'm not against the idea. So here we go. You pay money for that. 12% of people admit to pooping in the shower Now does it elaborate In this Huffington Post article Why? Like is it an accidental

Has somebody admitted to doing Accidentally went sick? Yeah Accidentally went sick You know like a tummy bug Yeah That's disgusting Plug holes aren't that big

You'd have to toe it a bit You'd have to get the foot involved. This isn't a traditional. Surely not. We're not talking a traditional shower with a small. I've got a very tiny shower slit. But does it take off? You can take it off.

Mine you have to. It's really hard to get off. Oh, you've got like more of a great, like a slim line as opposed to a whole line. Because I always take off the thing because the wood will be a huge dump in the church. When I take off the thing to clear out all the hair. The bald man of the

house, this does, you know, you might be thinking that's not fair, and it's not. The bald man of the house has to clean out both the showers. Yeah, but it's your wiry pubes that clog it up. My wiry pubes are so straight and wiry they shoot straight down the plug hole. They're like little needles. Yeah, but it's your wiry pubes that clog it up. My wiry pubes are so straight and wiry they shoot straight down the plug hole. They're like little needles. Yeah, yeah.

Straight down. Whereas it's your wife's long, luscious hair. And my daughters have both got long, thick hair as well, so I have to clean it out. But when I open it up, I'm always surprised at that size of that hole down there. Yeah, right. But no one's pooping in a shower if it's an old school plug with a plug hole

over a shower. What is wrong with people? Is it the same principle that you take when you are wee in the shower? You're like, well, I'm here. It saves water. No, it's not the same. It's not the same. But to them, is it? I think if you had like food poisoning or like a tummy bug and you

were just running, sure. Maybe I can see how if you were liquiding everywhere. Okay, so some messages in and people are saying they have lived in flats where people poo in the shower and stomp it down the plug hole. No! No, no, no! What is wrong with people? Somebody said we're in a flat and we said when a new flatmate moved in,

we're like, we don't know how to ask this, but you aren't by chance pooing in the shower, are you? And the flatmate said, yeah, on occasion I do, but it's all right. I chocolate waffle it down the... Chocolate waffle it down the what? No! We had an exchange student once and we noticed a weird smell coming from the sink. No!

We found out he was peeing in the sink where we all brushed our teeth. We could see the pee splatter marks in the smell. No, yeah, because it gets a bit thick. Yeah. And so we were like, oh, we don't pee in the sink here. And they were like, okay, that's different from home.

We don't pee in the sink. Where else do they pee in the sink? I don't think they pee in the sink anywhere. Wow, guys. Okay, wow, no. Not a gift to, yeah. The flatmate that was pooing. They didn't last so long

and they said he wasn't a flatmate. I was going to say, yeah. Why are so many people, there's like 10, 15 tits saying it's called waffle stomp. Like we're supposed to know what a bloody waffle stomp is.

Oh. People are just stomping through the little old little bug hole. Yeah. Y this is disgusting. I'm going through the little old plug hole. Yeah. Yuck. No, no, no. I've had enough

of this chit chat. Okay, let's turn to food. I mean, we all poo, we all shower. Yeah, I know, but we know where to do it,

don't we? They've got allocated spaces. Yeah, they do. We are lucky. There's three spaces. One, you brush your teeth and wash your hands. One, you wash your body, maybe brush your teeth if it is stretch. Two, they do. We are lucky. There's three spaces. One, you brush your teeth and wash your hands. One, you wash your body.

Maybe brush your teeth if it is stretch. Yeah. Two, you do your poos and your wee's. Yeah. That's the shower, isn't it? Last one. You meant the shower. I forgot which one.

And there's one place where you can do it all. The shower. No. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. This is out of Britain. And so some of the ingredients that this person on TikTok uses to do a DIY McDonald's are not available to us.

But we can make our own version of this. Okay. She makes her own McDonald's loaded fries. Now, this has gone crazy, this video. Okay. She makes her own McDonald's loaded fries. Now this has gone crazy this video. Yeah. So she gets large fries. She gets cheeseburgers.

She gets with extra pickles. She gets chicken nuggets. Then she adds mozzarella. But you could just get cheese slices I guess. Or just take the cheese from the cheeseburger. Well, she gets mozzarella from McDonald's or she provides her own mozzarella? From McDonald's in the UK.

Oh, do they have like a mozzarella burger or something? They have it on a burger, so you can probably just order it as extra. Maybe. And then she adds, yeah, so she scrapes the onions and the sauce and the pickles from the burger, breaks up the burger bun, breaks up the patties, puts that on the fries,

breaks up the chicken nuggets on there, and then she adds curry sauce, which is very British. It is. Now, we don't have curry sauce. Do they get it in the – excuse me, I'm getting – He's really hungry. He's getting a little cheesy. He's getting a little cheesy.

I'm salivating. Do they get the little like sweet and sour sauce, but curry sauce? Oh, yum. So this website's given how to make it in Aussie New Zealand. So they do large fries, double cheeseburger with extra pickles, and then you rip that apart. Yeah.

Chicken nuggets, sweet and sour sauce, and some Big Mac special sauce. Oh, yeah. And then you get it and you put it all into a container and you shake it up, baby. And you've made loaded fries. Yeah, look at her. She's like pouring that curry sauce over.

There's cheese, there's patty, there's chips. So you could do that with sweet and sour. Totally do that with sweet and sour or barbecue or whatever. Or mayo. And then she just gets a fork and eats it. Yum. Now we were talking about maybe going out for a nice dinner on Friday. This is it. Let's just on Friday. This is it.

Let's just do this. This is it. Because this looks legit. She's got chicken nuggets. She gets a forkful. It's got chips, sauce, chicken nuggets, and beef patty, and a little bit of bun, and it's all saucy, and there's onions and pickles everywhere.

This is genius. I wouldn't have thought of, I customise my own burgers. Yeah, but you don't break it up and do that. Hell no. This is next level genius. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I reckon I fell asleep about midnight.

Oh, my dude. I've had a couple of early nights. Yeah. 8.30 Sunday night. Oh, delicious. And last night it was just before 9 o'clock. Even after a two-hour nap in the afternoon. Even after a two-hour nap when I got home from work. Do you reckon that's a question people ask you a lot when you do these hours and this job?

What time do you go to bed? What time do you go to bed and what time do you get up? For me it's anywhere between 8 o'clock going to bed and midnight falling asleep. Like it's just up for grabs. It's up for grabs. It's up for grabs. It just depends on so many factors. And yesterday some factors came in

and Aaron did flag these to me. Yeah. Now we were hanging out yesterday. What were we doing? Oh, spray painting our fireplace. Okay. Giving it a fresh coat before it gets reinstalled tomorrow.

What are you painting? The actual fireplace itself. Sorry, no, no, no. The box, the firebox. Yeah, that's what I'm asking. Yes, yeah, yeah. installed tomorrow. What are you painting? The actual fireplace itself. Sort of a heat resistant dark. the box, the fire box. Yeah, that's what I'm asking.

Yes, yeah, yeah. Can you paint that? It comes with, the brand's got a paint. So if it gets mucky or whatever,

or scratched, you just go and You redo it. It looks brand new. Oh wow. It looks brand new. Anyway, so we were doing that

and then afterwards we felt quite accomplished and I said, well I think we deserve a cocktail. And I said, well, I think we deserve a cocktail. And I recently, because it's been at least a couple of weeks, was like, I really want to make espresso martinis. And he was like, yes, make them.

So he went down to get vodka. I made the espresso on the machine. I had everything ready to go. We looked at the time, and it was like four maybe. Oh, no. You don't drink coffee after two. And you know I don't even drink coffee. No.

The most I would drink coffee is one, when I'm panicking and two, espresso martinis on the weekend. Yeah. But I really felt like it. Aaron was like, is this going to disrupt your sleep? And I was like, nah, espresso martinis never disrupt my sleep. He's a wise man. Yeah, he is.

He knew. Well, unfortunately he did. Because then I made them and I made them real strong and nice. And we just had one. It was really really good and then we switched to wine and then On a Monday May I say on a Monday

night. What kind of wine? Because we tapped in again to the Tees McLean Reserve last night. This is TV personality Manny McLean got married and then because the wedding was near Vaughan's house, after the wedding, this leftover wine

has been sitting in your garage. He said, on New Year's Day, is it right if we store the wine in your garage, as soon as the winery that we bought it from opens, we're going to take it back.

I said, absolutely fine, but there will be a tax. Tee hee hee. And he said, absolutely. Now, I don't think he took me seriously about my tax.

You're like 25, 26 bottles in. And the tax man cometh. Yeah. And the tax man cometh. Wow. No, I... I'll say there's a lot of Chardonnay left. Oh, yeah.

Not a lot of Pinot Noir. Yuck. Not a lot of Pinot Noir. We had salve, but then a friend came over for a little bit, and then we said, do you want another drink? And he said, no, I might have a cup of tea. And I said, I'll have a cup of tea. And my friend had a sleep tea, because he was heading home to go to sleep. And I said, I'll have a cup of tea. And my friend had a sleep tea

because he was heading home to go to sleep. And I said, I'll have an Earl Grey. And Aaron goes, with caffeine in it. And I said, I'll be fine, mate. Stop trying to get in my way. And he made me a cup of tea. I love, as the feeling of a male who, not always Earl Grey, but will ask his

female cohort if she does need another drink. Do you need another one? Do we need another one? I love when you're told that you're fine. I think I know my own, and you're like, well, okay. Your wife is so fine when she's drinking, though. And she's the best.

So we encourage it. Yeah. And then, ha-ha, do we? And then you're right the next day. Yeah. You don't even need to say I told you so because you know it in your soul. Well, mine wasn't the alcohol that was a problem. It was the caffeine because about 11.30 I turned to Aaron who was watching something

because he doesn't need to go to bed the same time I do. He was watching something and I tapped him and he was like, you need to go to bed. And I said, should we go to the park? At 11.30 at night? Yeah. He was just like, why? And I said, I cannot sleep. And I said, also, what's that thing that people use to cut through the, he was just like, why? And I said, I cannot sleep.

And he said, also, what's that thing that people use to cut through the bush? He was like, machete. I was like, thank you. And I wrote it down in a note. He was like, what is happening? Do you want to go to the park? And what are those big knives for? I'm tired.

I'm tired today. Yeah, but stop having caffeine. It doesn't agree with you. Because I don't do caffeine. You've got to have a cut off of caffeine at like, what time do they? Two o'clock? Well, tonight, don't worry, we're going to do whiskey sours. Do you?

I have a four o'clock coffee because otherwise it's going to be a four o'clock Jameson's and I know which one's good for me. Play ZM's Fletch for the nightly. Play ZM. There is a woman called Marie. How many? I know a woman called Marie. Could many? I know a woman called Marie. Could it be the same one?

Tamara? There are many Maries. Moving on. Moving on. Let's not get silly. Someone doesn't want to digress. Someone's being silly. She's 28 years old and she is six foot two.

So you're six foot two, Vaughn. I am six foot two. Stand up. I2". So you're 6'2", Vaughan. I am 6'2". Stand up. I wouldn't say you're, like, tall, tall. But if you saw a woman like that, you're saying I'm fat. You heard it. He called me fat. It's not fat.

No, you're not. I didn't say fat. Chunky. You didn't say tall. Husky. Yeah. I mean, You're Yeah But for a woman

That's quite tall Like I'm 5'11 Just under 5'11 Pause for applause And Thank you And I'm 5'4 Thank you

I know people think You're so much taller And they see it in real life No I'm one of my Little fellas I'm 6'0 I'm 6'0 Wow that means you're 5'10

But you're gone If we are at an event People would often say, you guys are a lot taller than I thought. We collectively are a tall trio. Because do we look little on Instagram? We're tiny. In TikTok, do we look little?

No, we live in their radios. Oh, yeah. We're stuck in here. We're stuck. Where were your radios? Ow! Anyway, so she's six foot two and she says that dating is an absolute nightmare.

She says it's almost impossible. It's impossible. It's so limited. She said one guy I impossible. It's impossible. It's so limited. She said one guy I went on a date with, she was so relieved. He said he was six foot five, which is just a bit shorter than Aaron. Yeah.

On his online dating profile and then met up with him and he was like maybe 5'11". So people lie. Oh, right. I don't get that because when you meet them, like what are you going to...

Why would you lie? Why would you lie? Why would you lie because – I can tell how tall you are. Yeah. She says, I've been told no one likes tall girls. She's been told she looks like a man in heels. She's gorgeous, by the way. She works out.

She's ripped. People just say horrible things to her. She says she never wears heels. She's so embarrassed. She slouches in public. I'd do anything to make myself appear shorter. But now I think there's more now because because it used to be like, if you were the girl, you can't be taller than the guy.

Yeah. And now that's like, definitely not a thing. But girls definitely don't want a short guy, right? We stan a short king. No, we stan a short king. Well, they say that, but then, I mean, online dating, aren't girls all about the tall guys? Yeah, I like to climb a mountain or two. You know what I mean?

But like, I think there's less and less stigma around maybe being slightly taller than the man, if you're a woman. Anyway, she said this very difficult today, and I want to know, what is the thing that is ruining your dating life? Maybe you've got an ailment such as this height. Makes it hard.

Makes it hard. Maybe you're one foot tall. You know? And that would be hard. That would be hard. That would be really tough. Yeah. Are you Grogu?

And listening to the show, are you a one foot tall being? Or maybe you're a stick person. Maybe you have unreal or just expectations that make it hard. Like, you know, you only want someone over six foot seven. Maybe you've got an obnoxious personality and you're a toxic human being. I don't know if someone's going to admit to that. Well, I feel like we all know when we were dating,

what is ruining your dating life? Yeah, what's making it really hard? What's impacting it to the point that it's making it difficult? Maybe you are excessively tall. Maybe you are excessively rude. Maybe you've got four nipples. Maybe you've got a terrible voice. You know, you hear some people talk sometimes, you're like, oh no.

You look hot and you're attractive. And then you meet them. So tell me, what do you do for a living? And it's like, oh dear. What the hell happened there? You're so attractive. Okay, well, And it's like, oh dear. Oh dear. What the hell happened there? You're so attractive. Okay, well, maybe it's tall or not.

I don't know. Whatever it is. What makes your dating life hard? Yeah. Or what made it hard before you settled down? And then yeah, maybe you overcame it.

We just asked Vaughan if Sade was six foot five, would he be into it? And he said hot. It was an overwhelming, overwhelming yes, that one. We are asking you what is ruining your dating life.

There is a woman who is six foot two, as you said. It absolutely kills her dating life. People are intimidated by her. Don't see her as a beautiful feminine creature that she is, just because she's tall. So what makes it hard? What's ruining it for you? Christy, you're tall as well.

Yes, I'm six foot one. Yeah, girl. It's the good side of six foot, isn't it? I'm going to ask you the question I always get, and I'm only 5'11". Do you play netball? I used to, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Were you a goal shooter? Goal attack. Goal attack. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good, good. She's out the circle. Yeah.

So do you find that, do you date men or women or either or both or neither? Just men. Just men. Just men. Do you find that men are intimidated by your height or put off by it? Yes, I get a lot of guys that turn me down because of my height and because I'm not also the most feminine type and they don't exactly find that attractive most days.

Well, let me say to you, I do. You know I love my boyish men. You do, you do. My boyish women, sorry. Yeah, yeah. Good to know if I change the sides. Yeah, absolutely. So do you find that when guys are 6'1 or above

that they're more into it, but it's just the shorter guys, they just can't deal with it. Well, it's more so, it's not just them not being able to deal with me being this tall, but it's also me not being able to deal with Yeah, you want a big boy. dating a shorter guy. I like to look up at people. If I'm looking down at people, I just, I feel like I'm overpowering them, even though I'm not doing it.

It's a self-conscious thing. Hey little guy, do you want to get dinner? Hey Bubba, do you want to have a little cuddle? Do you find, because sometimes I see... Oh, I was in a store the other day and someone said to their boyfriend, Bubbs. Oh, get a grip. Bubba. That's not sexy at all. She said, Bubba, should we get

this roast chicken? I was like, bleh. Do you find, Christy, when you see a short girl with a tall guy, you're like, get out. I have a few bad words thinking in my mind. Yes, those are ours. Give me, give me, give me, give me, give me. Yeah, you go get the hot short guys. There's plenty of them.

Yeah. We need the big men for us. Christy, thanks. You call some messages in. My absolute need for good punctuation and grammar is a stop to my dating life. Somebody said, I'm gay and I don't like

gays. They're the worst. That's holding me back. I'd imagine that would be if you were. That is in the way. You really painted yourself into a corner there. How hot would someone have to be if they used the wrong there or your... Not that hot.

Oh, that'd have to be so hot for me. I'll say I love you and they'll say I love you too, T.O. I'll be like, oh. Oh, bugger. I love you too, W.O. No, there's only one of me. Yeah, yeah. I love you too where?

Yeah. Where do you love me to? I love you to the moon and back or what are we doing? Yeah, yeah. I love you too where? Yeah. Where do you love me to? I love you to the moon and back or what are we doing? Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. That works better. So judgmental. Yeah. A lot of people say their ex is their problem.

Wow. What, just not being able to move on from them? Well, or just they don't want them to. Somebody said that their ex and the fact that they'll never look after their children means it's hard for them to get any free time to go on dates. I'm a single solo dad and that's what makes my dating life hard. No one's keen on a 41-year-old solo dad. Seriously?

I thought that would have been, you would have been absolutely. I would be like, hell yeah. Look at this committed person who's made a great decision and they're a good father. And also now I don't have to ruin my body. I'll just take that one. We'll just use his. I'll use that as mine.

You call me mummy now. I'll keep it tight. You call me mummy now. We're done. I own my own home and have a good job. And I've been told guys don't want that. I remember when we've talked about this in the past when women earn

more than men and some guys cannot deal with it. Isn't that wild? Why would you not want that? What's ruining my life is my parents wanting me to get an arranged marriage. Yeah, that'll ruin it. How do you get out of that?

Move and not tell them. Yeah, I guess that's the only way. Just get married and don't tell them. Just move and don't tell them. Just cut off all ties to your family and just start a new life, I guess. My unrealistic expectations are ruining my dating life. I'm in the South Island

and I just want to find someone who's clean-shaven without a pig over their shoulder in a dating app photo. South Island. See, that's hot to me, though, because I'm surrounded by city boys. Pretty city boys. Oh, Georgia, she wants a bloody man on horseback. Large breasts are holding me back.

Men are either too intimidated to talk to me or ask to see them within the first 30 minutes. What? So you are at a restaurant? So tell me what you can overlook. minutes. What, so you ran a restaurant? So tell me what you can overlook. Yeah. So where did you grow up? Show me your boobies. So your mother, she was, oh, can I see your tits?

Do you have any siblings and boobie, boobie, boobie, boobies? Are you allergic to shellfish? Yeah, they don't like to see others' nipples. Can I get the Johnny Cash stash? Is that still chicken? Now breasts! Breasts! I must see them!

My small bladder makes dating tricky to go anywhere because I need to constantly go wheeze. That's you as well, yeah. I had a larger than life personality when I was in my late teens and once I was at a party and a guy casually went and asked my friend if I had a mental

issue. Sorry? They had a larger than life personality and they didn't know that it was a problem until in their teens they went to a party and a guy asked their friend if they had a mental problem. If they had a mental issue.

No, she's just an extra. Look at this, we could be running a dating service. God, hook me up with a date with a 41 year old single dad. Yeah, that is hot. But then someone said, I'd like the phone number of the girl with the big boobies, please. Aww, so disappointing. What do you doing that for?

One step forward, two steps back. Play. Zed Inns, Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day is about why, with all the options for divisible numbers, there are 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour, and 24 hours in a day.

Yeah, 60's always weird, eh? Why wasn't it 100? Why wasn't it 100? Well, I can tell you. It's all thanks to the Babylonians. Yeah, 60's always weird, eh? Why wasn't it 100? Why wasn't it 100? Well, I can tell you. It's all thanks to the Babylonians. Oh, not them again. Oh, I don't know anything. By the rivers of Babylon.

I don't know. Where were the Babylonians? Because I know they were on Age of Empires. That's all I know them from. Yeah. And they were, well, if you were them, didn't you have advantages in sailing earlier than other?

Maybe. Other. Because they invented the other? Maybe. Other. Because they invented the America's Cup. Present day Iraq. Right. Oh, is it? Yeah. City of Babylon.

What was there? In central southern Mesopotamia. Mesopotopia. Mesopotopia. Mesopotopia. That's the whole Middle East. No, Mesopotamia. Mesopotamia.

That's what I said. Mesopotamia. Mesopotamia. We're all learning. What was it? The Hanging Gardens of Babylon were the world wonder of, were the natural, or one of the wonders of the world, wasn't it? With the pink terraces.

Yep. They. Go. Volcanoed. They got smashed by a volcano. So the reason is the Babylonians who had a sexagesimal system for maths and astronomy. That means counting in sixties.

Oh. Yeah. It's one of the hardest. I find the six times table is really difficult. Six times six. 36. 36. Go again.

Six times 12. 72. You're so quick at your calculator. Six times eight. 48. Six times seven. Yeah, 42. Wait.

He could be saying any number. I just heard laughing from the juice. How is it 48 and then 42? Because it's a six. Because it's a six. It's not a seven difference. It's a six difference. Oh, Queen Margaret College.

You've got a lot to learn. I learned that in a prefab. Yeah, see? Prefabs. I learned that in a prefab. Because you were cold. I was so cold, my brain was like, quick, so I learned that in a prefab. Yeah, see? Prefabs. I learned that in a prefab. Because you were cold. I was so cold, my brain was like, quick, work. Work as hard as you can.

So 60 and 12 can be divided by more than 10 and 100. They've got more divisible numbers. 3, 4, 2, 1, 6. Yes. 12 is divisible. 1, 3, 4, 6. 12 is divisible by one, three, four, six. Everything's divisible by one. Two, three, four, six and 12 itself,

whereas 10 has only got three that are whole numbers. One, two, ten, five. Yeah, five, two and ten. I'm just so lost. There's easier ways to break it down. Look, I'm just reading out the answer. Why are you mathsing us on it? Yeah, why are you mathsing us? I'm just reading out the answer. Why are you maths-ing us on it? Yeah, why are you maths-ing us? Look, I'm just reading out the answer that Phil gave in the Guardian newspaper in 2013.

Damn you, Phil. So they just found it was easier to divide the day up by 12 than it was for 10. Right. Et cetera, et cetera. So that's why we have... 12s and 60s or so are prominent in 12 months of the year. Yeah. 12, two lots of 12 is 24 hours in a day.

60, 60. 60s and 12s all through. And it's all thanks to the Babylonians and their hanging gardens in modern day Iraq. So today's fact of the day is maths is old. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Vornie, we've been chatting a bit about how many Fijas are actually

tumbling off your trees at the moment. Yeah, some monsters too. They're everywhere. You can't even get rid of them for free. Four buckets of Fijas I picked up yesterday. Four 10-litre buckets of Fijas. And then it went through the strict Smith grading system. Strict.

Four buckets. One, straight to the pigs. Okay. Like manky. That's squishy. Overripe. Manky, squished, coals, had a little chew in them, bird strike. Yep.

Guava moth. Yep. Bucket two, jam. That's where they're okay, but they don't make the strict grade, so they get moolahed up and turned into jam. That's nice. Three, ready right now. Perfect.

Ready to go. Get these sold. Get these given away. Three, ready right now. Perfect. Ready to go. Get these sold. Get these given away. Fourth bucket, hard. Too hard. So do they ripen in the bowl? Yeah, you leave them in a shady area or in a cooler shady area

and they'll slowly ripen. Right. Right. So you've bagged up some and you're selling them at work. Well, the girls have been selling them on the side of the road, but then today, on the

weather last night, because we've been taking this very seriously, I looked at the weather and it was like, it's going to be windy and rainy, so I was like, tomorrow's not going to be the day, but we had all these ones bagged up for today's sale and they don't last very long and I was like, well, I'll take them to work and I'll pop them on a table there with a sign that says Fiji, $3. Yeah, but normally people bring in

excess fruit and it's free. It's free. That's what we do around my neighbourhood. You've had it too good for too long. Because we do that because we're very fruity where we are. Yeah. And people just put out boxes on their front berm. I love that. Free, free Fijas, free, I'll do free limes, you know me.

Yep. Full of limes. You should be having limes. Limes are absolutely top tier fruit. Yeah, we shouldn't say that because can people please not try to find my house? Thank you. Primarily for the limes. You should be giving limes away. Limes are absolutely top tier fruit. Yeah, we shouldn't say that because can people please not try to find my house? Thank you. Primarily for the limes. I've actually promised the limes to our mutual friends.

A lot of people lining up for the limes. Yeah, the lime line is around the block. So $3? Yeah. What does that get you? For a kg of Fijawas. Okay, because the supermarket's only between six and nine. It's always over a kg.

Right. We'll never Go under a KG We'll always go One big Feejoer And push you over I just don't know But none are sold out there No one's going to pay

No one's going to pay Especially if they know They're yours So you're doing Three dollars a KG Countdown's eight fifty A KG Yeah see

Well under half Half the price And they're big girthers Because they're big They're going to be big to make the grade, otherwise they get put in the jam container. Or about teeny tiny, like grape size, straight to the pigs. Okay.

Straight to the pigs. I'm just going to cross-reference another supermarket. Well, Peg and Save isn't even selling Fijas. I saw something yesterday for sex at New World. I think it was sex. Sex. Okay, so you've got half-priced Fijas. We're in the absolute peak of the Fijos season, too.

It's been a really big one since the beginning. It's not a good look, is it? Are you going to tell the other people in the company that you give them to us for free? Um, no. We'll keep that quiet. Because your time off free Fijos is also up. Free Fijos.

I hope people don't honesty box. I hope they just take them. You can even want to steal. I put, actually, I got one of the Keep Cups that say Coast, you know, the radio station in Coast, because I thought they'll think it's Tony Streets and they'll be like, give her the money. Yeah.

That's what you should have put on there, Tony Streets Fee Joe. Tony Streets Fee Joe. She's not a woman. And say it's an appeal. Yeah. It gives a real charity vibe to it, but it's not. It's just lining my back pockets for their kids.

Yeah. Play. ZDM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. One of the biggest topics of the year, isn't it? Working from home. Is it working? Is it not? People are slacking off or getting more done.

The debate continues. But it's something we've been doing ever since the pandemic kicked off. And now with huge numbers, there's a new term called shirking from home. Now, I didn't know what shirking meant. Shirking to avoid or neglect your responsibilities. Yeah, shirking. I've never shirked. You've never heard that word?

No, I'm a hard worker all times, any time. Yeah, you are. So no one's ever had to use that word. She's a herker, a hard worker, not a shirker. Thank you very much. Now, shirking from home is obviously when you're sort of doing anything else but working on the company dime. Yeah.

And they say there's a huge rise in shirking from home because of these gym memberships. Like gyms are saying, oh, we've got heaps of people coming in during the day as opposed to pre-pandemic. Yeah. Golf clubs are saying that they've been busier during the business work week, during the day. Yeah. Because people are popping off

for a round of golf. Hairdressers are all booked up and beauty therapists because people are like, well, if I can get a better appointment and avoid the traffic, I'll go at 11. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I mean, I guess if you do your work earlier from home and then you fit in your hair appointment or your beauty... So the last time I went to the hairdresser, it took five hours. What? Just put that in context. So you're not just popping to the hairdresser and going for it.

Okay, so you're taking a half day of work. Like a two-thirds day you're taking off. The leisure industry, just like fun things like sports and activities you can do are all saying they're getting busier and busier during the work week, in the afternoons, as people are just having fun. Because do you guys ever think this? Because we work weird hours really early and then we can be out of here any time before midday. And then I'll be like maybe at the pool or the gym and I'm like mid-afternoon. I'm like, why is it so busy?

Do these people not have jobs? I always do that. What are you guys doing here? But then I'll be like maybe at the pool or the gym and I'm like mid-afternoon. I'm like, why is it so busy? Do these people not have jobs? I always do that. What are you guys doing here? But then I'm there. But then I've done my work for the day. Yeah, I know. What are these people doing? Yeah, I mean, I guess some people take a lunch break at a different time.

I think that as well. I'm like, what do all these people do? Sometimes if there's a traffic jam and I'm driving home, where are all these people going? Where are you coming from? What do you love to do? Yeah. How are you affording this world? The world revolves around you, right?

Yeah, I know. It's okay that I'm doing it. There's also been an increase they've got from FPOS machines in daytime shopping. Oh, wow. Like people going out and just having a little mid-afternoon shop. And also TV ratings. People are just sitting at home watching telly.

I love this. Really? Yeah. So, okay. Really? Yeah. So, okay, so working from home's not going too great then. Because I feel like if you were... Or is it? Yeah, I mean, we can't do anything but talk, so you have to be engaged to do it.

But if you had quiet work on a laptop, you could do any time of the day. I'd do it too. I saw an ad online the other day for a mouse jiggler. Oh, yeah, I've heard about that. The people that workplaces that track that you're actually at the computer and moving your mouse, and if it doesn't move for so long, it sends them an alert,

and this thing just jiggles your mouse. So it's about the same size as a mouse, and you put it on there, and it just jiggles it and moves it around. Jiggle, jiggle, jiggle, jiggle, jiggle. One, that's cheeky, but two, I would so resent my company tracking my mouse movement. I know, same. Am I getting my work done or not? Well, no, because you've had a five-hour hair appointment.

Yeah, but don't I look cute? Well, congratulations to you, podcast listeners, that you've reached the end. So I would assume if you've listened all this way through, you're either asleep, in which case, wake up! Or you enjoyed it. So drop us a review and tell your friends. That's how podcasts work.