ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 19th November 2024

Episode Date: November 18, 2024

Amazon's rival for Temu Top 6 Pieces of advice from Vaughan on his anniversary Dating app numbers are down Sitcoms that are 10's all the way through When did the breakup come out of nowhere? Animals will side with whoever is losing the argument Carwen caught a cheater New common stolen car What do the opposite sex love about you Fact of the Day Shannon and carwen review of Wicked SLP - Do you wear undies under your togs?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years, in the 1970s, the Mr Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of play. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Then he just pulled out a gun, shot her in the back of the head, and then said to Wayne, you're going to help me bury her. This is Mr Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify,

or wherever you get your podcasts. The ZM Podcast Network. The Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Great Things Are Brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. Thank you, Bryn. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Hi, I'm the Hayley bit.

Little blocked up there. Yeah, always. I just can't shake this madness. Even with your Viral X, even with your dirt pills. Yeah,, Aaron turned, because I've given it to Aaron, of course. Oh, good. And he turned to pseudoephedrine yesterday. And he said, do you want some to help kick it faster? I said, no, I've got my Viral X. He went straight to pseudo.

He literally had a sniffle. I'm fighting a hard fight to remain natural. And he was raised Catholic, so it'd be like communion. You put the pseudoephedrine in his hands. Peace be with you. And he says, Catholic, so it'd be like communion. You put the pseudoephedrine in his hands. Peace be with you. And he says, and thank you to David Seymour. None of that makes any sense to me.

I grew up in a heathen household. The top six is coming up today, Vong. I realised last night it was my brother's birthday. Oh, yeah. And of course, on my brother's birthday in the year 2000 was when I lost my virginity. Great. I love that now your brother's birthday. Oh, yeah. And of course, on my brother's birthday in the year 2000 was when I lost my virginity. Great. I love that now your brother's birthday is always a reminder of that for you.

Synonymous with it. Yeah. It's so funny how you, oh, I mean, that's an easy way to remember the date. Yeah. I remember my date, Feb 10. Feb 10? Yeah. Summer.

Fletch, do you remember yours? Hot, clammy. Would have been hot, clammy. No, Wellington summer though, windy. Oh, okay, so windy, hot wind. Also a breeze. Yeah, nice breeze. Keep cool.

No idea of your date. No. You don't know the date? Why would I remember the date? I don't know, I just do. It's just sort of a moment in life. Why would you remember that? Oh my God, he hasn't done it yet.

Oh my God. Virgin. Virgin. Oh my God, you heard that? Virgin. Virgin Virgin Yeah Oh my god I'm so embarrassed

Oh my god I don't remember the date Because it hasn't happened Virgin Virgin Virgin Actually There's nothing wrong with that

There's actually Thank you Just waiting for the right lady Yeah I am Saving yourself I am For someone special

Yep Well I've got the top six It's taking a while Yeah Don't worry They'll while but it's okay don't worry they'll come along that's okay

yeah they will top six pieces of advice I give to you on my 24th anniversary of losing my virginity what is this did this need to be a top six

I just cracked I just cracked up laughing last night and I was just like and then I regretted it the minute I'd written it but now we've had a bit of fun

I'm back on board yeah you're great at least you're not a virgin. Virgin, virgin, virgin. Which would also be okay if you were. It's absolutely fine if you were. Next on the show. As if Amazon needed another way of making money. But they've

found one. Play ZM's Flashborn and Hayley. When was I doing that Timu order? I still haven't made it. Remember I got obsessed with the slogan tease. There was a terrible cheap Timu slogan tease I still haven't made it. Remember I got obsessed with the slogan tees. Those terrible cheap Timu slogan tees. And then I started adding to cart, you know, to get the

you gotta make your $33 or something. So I was adding burger smash things for me and I just never made the order. That's sort of what Timu is for me now. Fill up a cart and then abandon it. Yeah, well it's impulsive and you're like not doing it and given those t-shirts probably environmentally

aren't great. Do you know what? Where was I? I went to a restaurant. Darlings. I went to a restaurant and there was a waitress came and served me and she was wearing one of the slogan tees and I looked at the quality of them. I was like, yuck.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. It was one of the fun likees. And I looked at the quality of them. I was like, yuck. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It was one of the fun, like, margarita for a senorita or something like that. And then I saw it and was like, okay, I'm glad I didn't get it. Anyway, love Timu because I never actually buy anything. I just have fun looking at all the cheap stuff.

Yep. Amazon has launched Amazon Haul. And it is basically a competitor to Timu or Shein or whatever. Those cheap AliExpress things. Everything's $20 and under. It's junk. It's like a marketplace. Like a real kind of cheap crap.

I don't love it. Nothing over $25 I think. So it'll be basically the same sellers that are on AliExpress and Timu. Just another. Just be on Amazon. Another platform.

But now Amazon gets its little cut because I think as a company, they're struggling. You're doing it tough. I know. Really doing it tough. Sorry to hear. Timu, because Timu you can use as a website, but originally it was like, get the app, get the app, get the app. Amazon Haul is an app.

But you go www.amazon.com forward slash haul. I've gone back to AliExpress because Timu just kept they're always like spend $30 and we won't send it unless you spend $30. Spin this wheel. I was like I don't want to spin the wheel. I just want to buy one thing that I need. Yeah that's what I want. The one thing. And then it was really like Timu

you would order something and then like two days later it would arrive or you'd order it and then like three months later you'd forgotten about it and then something turns up later it would arrive or you'd order it and then like three months later you'd forgotten about it and then something turns up on your doorstep. It depends how big. It's never in the middle.

I got those sheet organisers and they took three months I think to arrive and these little like folders. They did arrive though and I started using them on the weekend and they were quite good.

Right. Like you fold up your sheets and then you put them in this little box like this. Probably just could have got them from Kmart or the warehouse. That's why my kids are a t-shirt folder. Oh, yeah, similar. No, like, can we get one?

I was like, well, get a bit of cardboard. Yeah, you can make it out of cardboard. You can make it out of cardboard. Yeah. Yeah. I used to have a t-shirt, a plastic t-shirt folder. Did you? Folded t-shirts were really good.

I know, but just learn how to fold them. Just fold them and put them in. You just tuck them. Yeah. Or hang them up in the wardrobe Hang them up in the wardrobe is nice It's a nice touch I think that's when you're living life elite

When your t-shirts are hung Oh I hang all my t-shirts That's why you're living life elite All that I'm doing is I just don't have as much Crap as you Like if you didn't have as much stuff in your wardrobe You could hang your t-shirts too I don't know what I'm going to do. You know the wardrobe's

not finished right at our house. We put in a temporary rack in there and already the wardrobe, it's full. It's like a quarter. It's like women buy stuff but never wear it. Yeah, that's weird. It's like women's weight fluctuates and they're holding on

to a lot of stuff in case one day they fit it again. Okay? I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know where all these clothes are going to go. holding on to a lot of stuff in case one day they fit it again. Okay? I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know where all these clothes are going to go. You need to vacuum pack some stuff and chuck it in the garage. I vacuum sealed some blankets yesterday. Yeah, but that's just making it a problem for another day. Kicking the ball down the road.

That's life, dude. Yeah. That's life. Making today's problems tomorrow's. Life. life. Making your today's problems tomorrow's life. Play ZM's. Flesh, Vaughn and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the top six.

Alright. Top six pieces of advice I give you on the 24th anniversary of losing my virginity. How was that out of ten? Without too much detail? Pretty, uh... Quack. Yeah. You're great. I wouldn't say she'd be

ranking it high. I don't even remember. You reckon you'd get a below average. Oh yeah. If it was NCEA I wouldn't get a credit. NA. Not achieved. Not achieved. Is that what happens in NCEA? It would have been an NA. I mean I would have got achieved but

she definitely didn't get an achieved. Top six pieces of advice I can offer you. Number six. I don't think this will be a replay either. I don't think we'll play this again at five. Don't rush into it. Well, that's great advice. Don't rush into it.

Like Fletch is 45 and still a virgin. Yeah, thank you. Hi, Fletch. Yeah. Nah. In all seriousness, don't. Don't rush into it. Oh, I won't.

That's beautiful. Don't rush into it. So I'm still waiting. I actually sent a text message to my first the other day. Just like thinking of that magical night. No. Well, I was listening to an album That we used to listen to Okay

Yeah Huh Is that full on? Yeah that's pretty full on Imagine me being an ex Just trying to picture that That'd be weird Just follow you for life

Never really let go Yeah It'd be like Your phone would be on the bench It'd be like And then your partner would look And see Message received from Hayley Sproul Your partner would be like the bench, it would be like, and then your partner would look and see message received from Hayley Sproul.

Your partner would be like, what does she want? Weird, why is she messaging you? And then you open it up and it says, hey, I was just listening to this album. Oh my God, made me think of you. And then the partner's like, now he's in trouble. He's done nothing and he's in trouble. He's in trouble. Oh goodness.

Number five on the list of the top six pieces of advice I can offer to you on this, the anniversary of losing my virginity. Dry humping is peak human sexuality. Yeah, you return to the humps of recent years. It's just fantastic. Too much rubbing. Yeah, that's a technique issue. Okay.

You can, you know, adhere your own rules to the DH. Okay, move on. Yeah, move on. Number four on the list of the 12 six pieces of advice I can offer you. For goodness. The anniversary of Lucy Moe Virginia. Feedback, always welcome. Oh, yeah, more feedback.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. More communication during. Great. Before. Maybe set some goals. Yes. Before. Feedback during.

Maybe a couple of KPIs in there as well. Yeah, a couple of KPI in there. Halfway through maybe if you're stopping, maybe a whip. You can have a whip meeting. Work in progress. Yep. At the end of it, post analysis. CEOs and managers make love.

Yeah. Yeah. Getting a bit of a feel of the State of the Nation Number three on the list of the top six pieces of advice I can offer you on this the 24th anniversary of losing my virginity

Trail the positions you like You're never going to beat missionary I have to agree with you there It's the good lord's It's the good lord's chosen It's the good lord's way It's the good lord's way You might

try Sometimes you may take a wayward path Yeah I'll tell you where you're always going to end up back at. Missionary Bay. Good old Missionary. Number two on the list of the top six pieces of advice I love for you.

On this, the anniversary of losing my V-Pace. Spend time on the foreplay. No one ever said, man, that foreplay went for too long. Oh, maybe they did. I've never come across this situation. Wish they didn't bother with all that. Yeah. Said no one ever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've never come across this situation. Wish they didn't bother with all that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Said no one ever. Yeah, exactly. And number one on the list of the top six pieces of advice I can offer you on this, the 24th anniversary of losing my virginity. When someone finishes quickly, it should be taken as a huge compliment. Sure. Says every man ever. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And you know, ladies, I'm just... And gentlemen. Gentlemen who sleep with gentlemen and ladies who sleep with gentlemen. Lesbians don't have this problem. It's one that they've just tapped out. They're like, no, thank God I didn't even listen. Huge compliment.

Huge compliment. That's the only stop sign. Jesus. Play. ZM. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Huge compliment That's the only stop sign Jesus Play ZM Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley 133 hamsters On a plane

Running loose On a plane Yes Why It's a Portugal It was a Portugal flight Okay And

Yeah they got out They were being transported So they were in a cage Underneath In the hold. Yeah. Okay. The shipment was for a local pet shop. It contained 132 hamsters.

That's too many hamsters. Are they the ones that die if you give them a fry? Yeah. What's the difference between a guinea pig and a hamster? We're not allowed hamsters in New Zealand. No, we don't have hamsters. No. Why?

I think because of the Rodent They get out and they get loose I mean we didn't learn Oh my god they're cute though They're real cute Are they the ones that water ski Yeah They are aren't they

You're thinking they're no squirrel No that's a hamster That's a water skiing hamster. That's a water skiing hamster. Water skiing hamsters. They are cuter than guinea pigs. No, it's a water skiing squirrel. Is it? Oh, okay.

I imagined a hamster as well. I imagined it was a hamster. They do look very more ratty than a guinea pig, right? I know. Yeah, they definitely look more rodent, traditional rodent. Look at its little belly. And its little fingers that hold its hands together. I'm not saying rodents have to be trad rodents, by the way. That might have come across

like I'm not progressive in the rodent world. Oh, yeah. You're very woke when it comes to your rodents. Very woke when it comes to rodents. But that wasn't all that was on the plane. There was 133 hamsters, a shipment of ferrets and several birds. Yuck.

I went to high school with a girl, and she was American, and she had a pet ferret. That's weird. They outlawed it, eh? You weren't allowed to get a new ferret. You could continue to have the ferret that you had, but you weren't allowed to get a new ferret. And then people would just secretly breed the ferret.

They're like, what do you mean it's the same ferret? Imagine that thing running around and like running across you and stuff. I've always seen them out like, you know, you see them in traps if you go hiking. I don't think I've ever seen one. Sometimes roadkill. They're disgusting. Ferrets. Yeah.

They're pests and they're bad for humans. I didn't really know that we had them in New Zealand. So these hamsters are on the plane. They escape. They escape. So they land. The baggage handlers open up the cargo hold, and one sees a hamster, like, run past.

That sort of thing where if you saw it, you'd be like, what was that? What was that? Like a dinosaur. If it was Jurassic Park, it would be like a, you turn around and you, or M. Night Shyamalan's movie, Signs, where they're at the Brazilian birthday party,

and they spin around and the alien walks past the end of the alleyway. Like that. That's how I imagine he saw the hamster. Right. Very nice reference to a movie I haven't seen. Everyone remembers that image. It's weird because I will mention that because it was so terrifying but whenever I mention it people are like yes

you don't but you also didn't play Duck Duck And they freeze frame it on the alien as he walks past the end of the birthday party. No, I haven't seen it. It's going past the end of the alleyway. Great movie. That's when you know the aliens are there. Great movie.

Great movie. So they have to immediately shut it for multiple reasons. They can't have hamsters running buck wild. Well, they could be chewing wires. That's the other thing. They said they had to ground the plane until they had accounted for. They had to get the manifest. Yeah.

Manifest? Yeah. Why did I say manifest? had accounted for, they had to get the manifest. Yeah. Manifest? Yeah, manifest. Why did I say manifest? It felt like I was going to say manifesto. Yes. Manifest and said that there was 133 hamsters in the shipment and they weren't allowed to take the plane off again until they'd found all 133 of them.

Right, and checked that they hadn't eaten any wires. Yeah, they checked the wires, they read the diagnostics. So you'd be sitting at the airport, bing bong. Yep. Guinea pigs have the big bulbous sort of noses. Yep. Whereas hamsters just have a little cute little mouth nose. Right.

Did they get up into the plane to see the passengers? No. Oh, right. No, apparently not. To see the passengers? Hi, guys. Oh, my God. Absolutely shit yourself if you were sitting there

and you looked out and there's a hamster poking out of the air vent. Well, there's like 30 of them. Yeah. Oh, yuck. So I'm just reading because at the end of the story, it also tells you about other times animals have got out on a plane. Snakes. Snakes, obviously.

Snakes, famously. That's a documentary with Samuel L. Jackson. I've seen that one. There was a shipment of eels being sent from Toronto to Vancouver when the thing spilt during unloading, and there was just video. There was eels wriggly, wriggling. On the tarmac.

On the tarmac all through the loading. I hate eels. Ew. I hate them. They're disgusting. I'm fascinated by them. Do you eat them? I have.

Yeah. And I would. My dad does. I just don't come across them very often. Any other cases? Because you said looking up other cases and you just gave us eels. There was a rat on an Air New Zealand flight. I don't remember this.

There was on an Air New Zealand flight from Auckland to San Francisco, a rat was discovered in the aircraft cargo hold. But that was singular rat. Yeah. How'd that get in there? How'd you get in there, ratty? Probably just got on board. Like, just when it was boarding.

Probably smelt those little cheese packets. How does it hold its boarding pass? In its little hand. In its little hand. It's got hands, you stupid fool. God. I'm the stupid one. Yeah, what a stupid fool.

It's got hands. Yeah, because his hands are what he uses to drive that chef in Ratatouille. That's right. He grabs the hair and he grabs the chef. He's not using his mouth. God, you're so thick sometimes, Fletch. No wonder you're a virgin. No wonder you're such a virgin.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I've never downloaded a dating app. I've never downloaded a dating app. Of course I wouldn't. They weren't around when I got with Aaron, but I've never had one on my phone.

Ever. Not just... It's a bit sad. What? Have you? You do love playing with your friends' dating apps. I know. We were playing a grinder once.

With your friend. You downloaded Grindr once. Yeah, because some gay acquaintances wanted to know if there was any hot activity going on in Te Atatu when I lived there. Oh, when you moved into the neighbourhood? Yeah, they were like, anything going on out there? I love that you wanted to see if you had any hot activity going on in Te Atatu when I lived there. Oh, when you moved into the neighbourhood? Yeah, there was like anything going on out there. I love that you wanted to see if you had any hot gay neighbours. Yeah, so I checked it out for them.

Yeah. I thought... And my profile picture was the guy who restored the Waitangi house up north who looks a lot like me. Right. Have I ever shown you that photo? No. There's a guy who's an architect who restored one of the houses on the Wait like me. Right. Have I ever shown you that photo? No. There's a guy who's an architect.

He restored one of the houses. Yeah. On the Waitangi grounds. Yeah. And he looks exactly like me. Right, so you were catfishing your neighbours with a historical figure. That's why I was like a 60-year-old man. Yeah. Right.

On Grindr of all apps. On Grindr. And I tell you what, like the old dude, big glasses, tweed coat. Did you get messages? So many. Oh my God, well done. Turns out the gays love a dapper. They love a dapper gentleman.

Dapper daddy. Yeah, well I haven't had one, but apparently they're on the demise. People are deleting them nonstop. 65% of dating apps get deleted within a month. Yeah. And a lot of people are doing it within a week. They get this kind of burst of inspiration. within a month. Yeah. And a lot of people are doing it within a week. They're just going,

they get this kind of burst of inspiration. They're going, oh my God, I'm going to have a little look around, have a little play. And within a week, they're like, I've got to get out of here. But they end up re-downloading it? Re-downloading them.

And part of that- Or just going back to their ex because it's just easier. So much easier. Part of that apparently, especially with Gen Z, is that people, so they're going, right, we're boycotting.

There's so much of this on TikTok and Instagram. Like boycott the apps, get back out there and meet people face to face and go to these events and be brave and go to a bar and talk to people. And then people are coming back to the apps being like, do you know how hard it was? Oh, horrible. You had to talk to people.

I had to like go up and approach people and actually put yourself out there face to face. And they to like go up and approach people and actually, you know, put yourself out there face to face and they're like it is terrifying. But also like bad news for the apps. Tinder's paying users fell by 8% this year and Match Group that owns Tinder and Hinge, their stock plummeted

something like $30 billion since 2021. Yeah. Wow, okay. It's like, I mean, I'm sure they're still doing fine. I think it's still the kind of go-to way to meet people,

but with the social media trend of being like, get out there and give it a go. Then I was reading an article about this being, you know, following the trend

of get out there and IRL flirting, they call it. In real life flirting. Oh, okay. Okay. Figured that out. Yeah. In real life flirting. Figured that out. In real life flirting. Some tips

from a dating expert. For those that have been on the apps, it's not going well because it's through the screens. Go to a bar. Open your mouth and then let the words come out. They say uncross your arms. It's very hostile. Uncross your arms, take off your headphones and make eye contact.

Who's going to a bar With headphones Yeah that's weird And my default What are you like A 10 year old At family dinner Oh my god

Your default is arms crossed My default is arms crossed Very hostile You're closed Very closed off Put your arms somewhere else No not like Jesus Don't shake your titties

And be fresh Just kind of what Put them on your Where do you put your hands I don't know. What about leaning back on a chair? That's hot. Yeah, that's open.

And then you go drink water or a little cocky towel in your hand. Yeah. That's one hand sorted. Yeah. The other one could be doing some pointing. Right. Like that. Chat with three, four or five strangers,

regardless of whether you find them romantically interesting, because then you're just practising the interaction. So when you find someone that you're attracted to, then you, you know, a bit more practice at talking. If the person you're talking to is giving short clipped answers and isn't making eye contact, exit gracefully. If you're into someone, ask them if they want to get together outside of where you are

and don't beat yourself up if they don't reciprocate your feelings. Oh, it's the worst though. I remember, I think the worst, the most embarrassing was when I was into clubs in Wellington

and I hit on a guy who was at a balcony on, what was that bar called? Mighty Mighty. Do you remember Mighty Mighty? The name rings a bell.

Yeah. It was like a cool, funky bar and he laughed and left. He laughed? Yeah, I went outside and I flirted with him and he sort of laughed. Like I was embarrassing him. Why did he laugh?

Oh, Hayley. I know. Hayley. I know. Anyway, I don't want to put people off. Get out there IRL flirting. It's the only way forward. ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Someone on Reddit asked, what sitcom started as a 10, was a 10 throughout its existence, and finished perfectly? Yeah. Because nothing makes people more bitter and twisted than people stuffing it up on the last series. Yeah. Or an ending that's bad.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or something that faded out. Like, we love Arrested Development, us tree, but the last season when they came back 10 years later or something They couldn't get everybody back together because everybody was so famous. And they were fighting and Jeffrey Tambor

had been you know some questionable behaviour on set and then Jessica what's her face hated him and when you know that and you're watching it you're like oh the magic's gone You can feel it So what are the best ones from start to end? There's other rankings in there. One that didn't feature on this end list

that was compiled of the seven sitcoms that were great throughout. Yep. Scrubs didn't feature. I thought Scrubs might have been a hit. I never watched that. I never watched it. I don't think it ended great.

But apparently I saw the other day they're doing like a reboot of it. But some of the original cast are coming back. They're not getting Zach Braff, are they? Would they be able to get Zach Braff? Dunno. Dunno. Seinfeld's not on this list, notable exception.

The Office, both British or the US. Friends isn't on this list. No, not on there. Chairs not on the list. For me, The Office was great from woe to go, both British and US. The British one was right because it stopped. Yeah. No, but I watched all 10 series of The Office was great from woe to go, both British and US. The British one was right because it stopped. Yeah. No, but I watched all 10 series of The Office.

Yeah, I still haven't got it. And two of which didn't even have Steve Carell in it was still great. By the end, right? So this list has seven. Malcolm in the Middle is one of them. Malcolm in the Middle is fantastic. No, I never watched it. It was so good.

Just like... From first episode to the very last. So much weight was on the kids to carry the, I mean, Bryan Cranston was amazing in it. Yep. And it was before he did Breaking Bad, so it was when he was like comedy guy. Yep. But the mum and the dad are amazing, but the kids, especially

Frankie Mooneys that played Malcolm, was phenomenal. Another one, Veep. Oh yeah, Veep's great. Julie Louis-Dreyfus is the US Vice President. Here's a flashback and I loved this when I was a kid. Third Rock from the Sun.

Oh, you're great. Yeah, vaguely remember it. The vague premise was this bunch of aliens came to Earth and they inhabited human bodies. The oldest of the group, like of the aliens were stuck in the kid's body. Joseph Gordon-Levitt? Joseph Gordon-Levitt? Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

The most masculine military commander was stuck in the female's body. So there was this whole juxtaposition of the tough guy was in the female's body. That's right. And John Lithgow. French Jew and John Lithgow was like the bumbling leader that was amazed by. And he was so good. That third roll from the sun was amazing. Something more modern, Schitt's Creek.

Yeah. Which took me a little bit to get into To be totally honest Took a few episodes till the buying Because I tried to watch it when it first came out And I wasn't into it But then when it finished and everyone was raving about it I got back into it

So funny Literally I'm ready to go again I've only watched it through once Like I haven't dipped back The IT crowd, the British IT crowd Yeah that's so funny I'm ready to go again. I've only watched it through once, you know, like I haven't dipped back. Give it another one. The IT crowd, the British IT crowd. Yeah,

that's so funny. That had four seasons. We watched that, it was on a plane. Yeah. And we were just laughing so much, people thought we were crazy.

I never watched it. It's very, I think you'd love it. I'd be into it, yeah. Yeah, oh, you'd love it.

Matt Berry's in it. Matt Berry pops up. And Steve Merchant? No, not Steve Merchant, Steve and, um, other guy. Who was in Brides Merchant. Steve and other guy.

It was in Bridesmaids. The tall Irish guy. The tall Irish guy that's the cop in Bridesmaids. Oh, Chris O'Dowd. Chris O'Dowd, yeah. Yeah, and Richard Ayoade. The guy with moths, the guy with glasses. The Good Place is another show on this list.

I didn't know anything about it. I started it and I was just like, oh, what a wonderful premise for a show. Is that Ted Danson? Ted Danson. Is it Nick Lackton? Yeah, it's on Netflix. Yeah started it and I was just like, oh, what a wonderful premise for a show. Is that Ted Danson? Ted Danson. Is it Nick Clackton? Yeah, it's on Netflix. Yeah, it was made for Netflix. Very funny.

It's finished now. How many series did it have? Four? Four or five. Four or five? Yeah. 30 Rocks on the list. Of course it is.

Yeah, that's brilliant. 30 Rocks. So funny. What's his name? Alec Baldwin's best performance. Yeah. And Tina Fey. It made Alec Baldwin likeable.

It made him so likeable. It made him so likeable. It made him seem really funny and likeable. Since Beetlejuice, he hadn't really. Yeah. Apart from the odd SNL hosting gig that he's phenomenal at as well. Wait, no friends on the list? No friends. Because I think friends, it never missed.

It was just so enjoyable the whole time. It never did anything stupid that you were like, oh, why'd you do that? It was great. Perfect endings. Maybe it wasn't funny enough. No, it was still funny. Yeah, why is it on the list? And then like Rachel and Ross end up together.

So it's perfect. It was perfect. Yeah, and you would say there's no other show that gets referenced this much. If we just had just, you know, a dash more brown in there. That was a real downfall. It was just, God, it was white. Yeah, it was very white, wasn't it?

Well, that's actually a great list of TV to go and re-watch. Get into it all. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. There are millions of videos on TikTok of people sharing how just before, and it's aimed at millennial men, just before their millennial boyfriends or fiancés

or husbands left them, how they basically like love-bombed them before this happened and then ghosted. So they had no idea it was coming. So it's leaving their heads spinning. One example, right? A woman named Gillian, she gave up her career,

took months off of work, depleted half of her life savings so that she could move across the country so that the love of her life, who she'd been with for four years, could be closer with his father, who was unwell. Did all this, like moved, da-da-da-da-da, everything

got there and then he slipped her a note saying that he thought that they were incompatible and that he didn't want to be with her anymore. A note? A note? Fair enough, that's nice. Handwritten notes. No, boy, that's terrible. But there's so many examples, like

he flew me overseas and we went on a big romantic holiday together while we were there. He was like, this isn't working. Proposed to me and then like a week later was like, you're not the one for me. I don't think this is going to work. Real mixed messages here. Very mixed messages.

And it just leaves them being like, what happened? And apparently they say the worst people at this, oh my God, the worst people at this are millennial men. Another one, I was invited to dinner, told to wear my best dress. Just to get told he wasn't ready for a relationship in the middle of appetizers. What?

Now, wear your best dress means I'm going to probably propose to you. Yeah, it does. Yeah. Or at least wait till dessert as well. Wear your best dress. I know. I'm breaking up with you. It's over.

Yeah. What the heck is it? So I went to the bathroom and closed the door. He jokingly opened the door and said, we're going to get used to this for when we're married. He then walked outside to have a smoke and then I never saw him again. That's so good. Oh my God.

My ex took me to my father's grave and said, I'll take care of her now. One week to the day he dumped me. I'll take care of her now. One week to the day he dumped me. I'll take care of her now. I mean, I don't mean to laugh. Guys will say anything to get laid though. And that's what you've got to remember. You must remember.

This isn't that understandable, yes, but these are people that have already been together for a while. I know, a lot of the time. They're not trying to say anything to get them into bed. I've seen memes of this and it's like that they're trying to say anything to get them into bed I've seen memes of this and it's like that

come on now if we can just if we can just be real think of 20 years sometimes I'll still just say things with the intention of sex

when in the end of it right come on like in all seriousness yes we do till the day we die yeah

okay and they might be at the back of their mind being like it's not gonna last but man I'd like to have sex this evening. Yeah. I'm going to say some stuff. I suppose so.

But it's literally happening so often that it's become a meme. I've seen it. It's like the guy three hours before ghosting you, which is like. Yeah. The sort of things ghosts say the night before they go to sleep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. I just want to crawl into your skin.

Anyway. Where are we going to holiday next? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can't wait to combine our stuff seconds before ghosting you. Anyway, I want to know, I want to ask our listeners this morning, like when did the breakup come out of the blue? Just absolutely come out of nowhere. And regardless of gender, we don't have to just pile up on millennial men

who are supposedly the biggest culprits for this. But maybe it was like you just got engaged and then a few days later it was broken off. Yeah, you were talking about your future. You were talking about your future or you were on a big romantic holiday together that you'd been planning for ages or it just completely caught you off guard.

Especially the people that ghost and you just never see them again. Here's a good term for it, future faking. Oh, okay. They employ future faking tactics, making grand promises to keep someone interested, and then ghost when they feel that they've achieved that effect. Oh, this is juicy. Okay, well, we'd love to hear your stories this morning.

You can text through 9696. Give us a call now, 0800 dials it in. When did the breakup come out of absolutely nowhere? Wow. Okay. The message is coming through.

We want to know when the breakup came out of the blue because people are saying millennial men are the worst at this. What do they, what do they call it?

Fake, future faking. Future faking. Basically like love bombing you just before ghosting you. And it's leaving people going like, wait, wait, wait, wait, what happened? Yeah.

So when did the breakup come out of the blue? Ah, clear. When did the breakup come out of the blue? Oh, my goodness. So everything was going swimmingly. Bought me a toothbrush to keep at his place. I mean, that's a sign. Oh, that's a sign.

It's basically a drawer. What kind of toothbrush? Well, it wasn't an electric, so the sign should have been there. No, no, no. You always start manual. Yeah, you start manual. It was a disposable. Oh, that's a car.

Did it at least have some side bristles, the tongue scraper on the back? Did he forecount for the $6 one? You know what? I don't even think it was there. I don't think the bristles were there on the back? Like, did he fork out for the $6 one? Oh, you know what? I don't even think it was there. I don't think the bristles were there on the back. Okay, no tongue scraper. So quite a plain toothbrush. Yeah.

It actually gets worse. He then invited me to Christmas Day. I'm with my family, told my whole family, you know, I've got plans this afternoon, so, you know, I'll be quick here. And then ghosted me Christmas Day. Haven't heard from him since. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Did you turn up to his family Christmas? No, I didn't turn up.

Thank goodness. I was messaging like, what's the plan? Where do I go? And yeah, no response. Wait, you literally never heard from him again? Never heard from him again. Why did he buy you a toothbrush? I don't know. Someone explain. Smelly breath.

Wait, how long had you been seeing him before Christmas? Like three months. That's a significant amount of time. Right? In my mind, I'm planning the wedding. How old was he when this transpired? Oh, definitely millennial. Oh, definitely.

Yeah, right. Late 30s. Okay. Yeah, right. Late 30s. Wow. Yeah, it's rough out there. Toothbrush is a big move. It is. Clea, thank you. Some messages in.

Where to start? I moved to New Zealand from Europe with my kids when my long-term boyfriend, who was a Kiwi, and I got engaged. Three weeks after I got here, he broke it off, disappeared, and left us high and dry. Oh, my God. Moved your kids.

No. What part of Europe? Was it a good cheese nation? Oh, my God. I feel bad that you're missing the cheese. What if you left, like... We're not known for our cheese. Hayley's crying.

She's so upset about the cheese. Well, there's an eyelash in my eye. We are known for our cheese. But not, you know... It's not French, is it? Amazing that you're still here. You obviously stuck it out. Yeah.

It's a great country. My ex asked my dad for my hand in marriage. My dad said yes, and he proposed to me before he was deployed to Afghanistan. Okay. We spoke almost every day for six months. The day he landed back in New Zealand, I never heard from him. Tracked him down to Palmerston North with his girlfriend that I never knew he had. They'd been together for six years

with two kids and she was eight months pregnant. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Why did he bother asking the dad? What are you doing? How was he going to juggle that?

These stories are wild. Recently married. Two weeks from moving into a new, into our new built house. So we built a house together. Lovely. Oh my God, what a process. Went out for a nice meal and afterwards she announced,

I don't want this. I said, what is it you don't want, my dear? And she said, well, you, the house, the car, the job. And off she popped. Off she popped? And what, you never heard from her again? No. My partner and I had just purchased the dog

and I looked after him. I looked after the dog while he went on a boys' trip overseas, and then when he got back, we started building a house together. Halfway through, he broke up with me out of nowhere, saying, it's not you, it's me. Oh, my God. Don't build a house with someone if you're not sure. Yeah.

Was his birthday, had what I thought was a wonderful evening with his friends and family. Next day, went for a walk, and at the summit of the hill, he broke up with me because he felt we were growing distant and he didn't feel connected to me anymore. Where's far was it? All the way back down the hill with me blubbering like an idiot. I would have just broken up, broke up at the bottom of the hill, dug all the way up. Yeah.

And then if you still want to come to the top, come up. That's fine. You're allowed to come, but just please know that we're not together anymore. I came home from work to find his mother moving me out of the house. First I'd heard of it. Got his mummy to do it. Mummy, mummy, would you move that woman out of my house, please, mummy?

Someone just messaged him, men are pigs. Now, we're not saying men are pigs. There are some. No. Are there some women? Because I read the woman one, right? Yeah, you did. They would build the new house.

Men are pigs except one woman. One woman. So all men are pigs? Yeah. And also one woman is a pig. Just from our sample size today. Yeah. Just one woman.

One woman's a pig. This is pretty full. This is on full noise. Okay, go. Went to Paris to support him through a large sports event that happened this year. What happened in Paris? There was some swimming and the river wasn't there. Olympics.

Was the rugby world camp there as well? When was that? No, that was last year. Okay. Went to Paris to support him through a large sports event this year and found out on the holiday afterwards that he'd been cheating on me for months. We'd been together for years, had been living together. He said he couldn't wait to move on from sport

and start our lives together. Just before. Oh my God. That's nuts. I really want to know who that is. So do I. I really want to know. What about our Olympians behaving with us?

We can keep a secret. Although we'll probably find out and then we'll just be like, I don't know who that is or what even sport that is. Some niche sport. I didn't really follow that one. Yeah. I was going to say, when you said niche sport, I thought you were going to start rattling off sports.

I was like, don't say any sports because we don't know. We don't want to tar anybody with it. Oh, we're not going to, of course not. But we do want to know. We do want to know. Why are people doing it? It's such an odd behaviour. Is it because they're trying to convince themselves? Maybe,

maybe. And they're just faking it till they... And once we get through, you know our old, once we get past Christmas, everything's just got to get through to Christmas. Yeah. Next year's going to be a lot calmer. You're fooling yourself. It's their last ditch attempt at like trying to get it going. We're going to build this house and when we've got this house our relationship's going to be fixed. Yeah, right.

Well, because nothing fixes a relationship like building. And debt. Yeah, yeah. Well, because nothing fixes a relationship like building. And debt. Yeah, yeah, building and accumulating debt. And then I reckon chuck a couple of kids in on top. Oh, yeah. Because they'll fix a marriage. Absolutely.

And then, ta-da! Maybe a death or sort of a large sporting event or an illness. I mean, just all helps. Mmm. Wow, those were juicy. Thank you. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Some research has been done at the University of Buenos Aires in Argentina. In Buenos Aires to you.

No, Buenos Aires to you. Buenos Aires? This has to do with Buenos Aires. Buenos Aires to both of you. This looked at couples that argue and... That's no bueno. No, arguing is good and healthy in moderation. In moderation, of course.

As all things in life. Have you ever thought, you don't have a dog, but have you ever thought what the dog is thinking when you're having an argument with your partner? No. I think about it with- It is so far down my list of concerns. Or like what the cat's thinking.

Yeah, Rolly gets a bit like hoity. It is always awkward because you're like, not in front of the kid. But then afterwards, I always find Rolly comes in for a cuddle. He's quite sensitive to hurt feelings. See, that's interesting because that's what they wanted to figure out, but with dogs. Yeah, right. So what they did is they found that a dog will pick a side

after a couple argue. Great. And they will try to console the person they think is the victim while avoiding the aggressor in the fight. Wow. So basically the winner, the loser. Yeah, so and-

The winner and the loser. That's not healthy arguing. Yeah. No, that's- Healthy arguing. There's someone's losing and someone's winning. Is this what your therapist said?

Yeah, my therapist said, winner, winner, chicken dinner. I don't know if she did. Okay, so the team looked at 23 different breeds of dogs, including a Siberian Husky, a Border Collie, a Poodle and a Dushund. All kinds of dogs. A Dushund.

A Dushund. They asked two members of each household to pretend to argue in their home while the dog watched. Now, the owners both tried to grab an object placed between them before the aggressor started yelling at the victim, taking possession of the item, staring angrily and waving their arm. A bit of yanking. Yes.

Now, afterwards, both owners sat down looking at each other. The researchers videoed the scenes to analyse the animal's behaviour. And dogs gazed during this moment at the victims of the aggressor. Well, because they're protective, right? And they're feeling sympathetic towards them. And they chose to approach the victim, the less aggressive person in the fight,

the loser, after the fight. That's wild. And they picked, the dogs would always pick the person that they thought had lost the fight or was the victim. Little sidebar, when you give me,

give us studies like this, with examples like this, I always think, oh my God, I've done some crazy things as an actor, but being like a role-playing couple arguer, yanking and fighting over an object and then like waving my arms and be like, rah, rah, rah, rah, rah.

Yeah. Because you went to the police college. Yeah, I did the police training. Yeah. We had to do all sorts, pretend to jump off a building or like sit in a car with a gun and be like, oh, I'm not coming out. Oh, it was real fun. But I never did this.

I'd really, I'd nail this. Did they set the dogs on you? Did you ever do anything off the police? No, never. I don't think they just did that to random Toy Focardi grads. Chuck you in the bite suit. That'd be fun. No, no, you were never in harm.

Well, I don't know. Maybe don't argue in front of the dog. Yeah, they are judging you. Where are we supposed to argue? Kids, dogs, neighbors. In the bedroom. You just have to go, everybody out of the house. In your sound to argue? Kids, dogs, neighbors. In the bedroom. You just have to go, everybody out of the house. Soundproof room. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Play ZM's Flashborn and Hayley. Now, she claims she was not eavesdropping. No, eaves were dropped. Oh, she was eavesdropping. However, producer Carwin was privy to a conversation that perhaps she wasn't meant to hear. Look, I like to do this thing at restaurants where you come up with a back story.

Because that's what I predominantly am at a restaurant to do. But when you're sitting there and waiting for your food to come out, you come up with back stories for the people around you. I love doing that, yeah. Because sometimes you see a group of people and you're like, how do they know each other? Yeah, what is that? Are they colleagues?

Are they like the weird members of the family what did you just drop no my microphone exploded oh good it wasn't on um and so we were doing this game as we waited for our food to come out over the weekend and my boyfriend said that's definitely a couple on like... Is that a hard launch of your boyfriend? That's a hard launch. That's a hard launch. I was going to say that's a hard launch. That's a hard launch. I was about to message you saying you're hard launched. I was going to do it under the table.

Whatever, anyway. Okay, wow, we've got a hard launch. Houston, we have liftoff. Hard launch. Hard launch. Okay, okay, anyway. It's old to us. Old to us.

Sorry, boys and girls off the market. You really crowbarred that in, didn't you? Yeah, I like it. Not intentionally. Okay, okay, anyway. It's old to us. Old-age to us. Sorry, boys and girls off the market. She really crowbarred that in, didn't she? Yeah, I like it. Not intentionally. Okay, anyways. He said, I think that... Who did? My boyfriend.

Cameron's got a boyfriend. Cameron's got a boyfriend. And meanwhile, Fletch is still a virgin. Still a virgin. If you're joining us just now, it was established very early on this morning that Fletch, in fact, the only reason he couldn't remember the date he lost his virginity

is because it hasn't happened yet. Yeah, sorry, guys. I'm still waiting. Don't apologise for being you. Don't you dare apologise for being you. You wait for the one. Thank you for not bullying me, I know. Oh, we wouldn't.

We wouldn't dare. We're dreaming it. Please, Carwin, back to you and your boyfriend. Okay, anyway, so he said, I think that those... Who did? He said I think that those two are on somewhat of like an early-ish date. Not a first or a second. Girlfriend?

No, they've been going for a while. That's right, boyfriend. Yeah, sure, whatever. Anyways, whatever. We keep playing the game. So he thought that they were on like an early-ish date. Yeah, so maybe, no, maybe like fourth. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

They seem comfortable, but they're still trying to impress. We're at a nice restaurant. Nice. Anyways, he comes back. Okay, so this new boyfriend's got money. Yeah, humblebrag. We're at a nice restaurant. Wow.

I went to Jopop this weekend. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I had it on. Okay, yeah. Anyways, so he comes back from the bathroom and he goes, oh my God, I've got an update. He was in the bathroom washing his hands next to the man who was on said date, who was on the phone.

Who, in the bathroom? Yeah, I know. Have some respect. But for a reason, because he says, yes, babe, love you, going to be home shortly, just on a work meeting. No, you're not. No, you're not. But you're sure they weren't on like a work,

they weren't catching up for work, these two people? Or were they touchy? Do you three hold hands when you have dinner together? Yes. Oh, okay, maybe I've missed it. Oh, my God. So he told whoever's on the phone he's at work and he's holding hands at a restaurant with another woman.

I don't get this. That is wild. If you're cheating, why are you out at a restaurant holding hands? I know. It's too small. Too small a place. Especially if he's like, I'll be home soon.

He's local. Yeah. Even Auckland is small. Totally. Too small for that. Oh, God, yeah. Because the places you go, there's not that many.

Oh, my God. Also holding hands in a restaurant? Yeah. I've never heard of that. Were they across the table holding hands? Only one, but yeah. Oh, no. Yuck.

Yuck. But I will say, it was actually Wellington. And like on the main strip of Wellington. So you got whisked away to Wellington for the weekend. Wow. The new boy from Wilbur has got a bit of this. Weekends away. Weekends away in Wellington.

God, I remember those. Highfalutin. You know, the money either goes to travel or food. It can't go to both. There's not enough to go around. Unless your car is a billion dollar woman. I know. Jeepers, I see why.

In Wellington, even smaller. Name drop the restaurant. Let's go. Shannon is ready to burn down families. Shannon is just used to watching these dramas on TikTok and wants more action now. As a waitress, this would happen all the time. You could tell.

Yeah, 100%. What, cheaters or just first dates? Yeah, you could tell when it was cheating. If I was to maintain an affair, you'd only do it in hotels completely out of town. I would meet them in Tikawiti. Hot. Who's going to guess that?

No one's going to be there that you know in Tikawiti. Oh, you're not going to run into, oh my God, what are you doing here in Tikawiti this weekend? No one stays there. No. No one stays there. Unless they broke down. And what a beautiful place to lose your virginity.

Yeah, that would be nice actually in the Tikawiti motor lodge. That would be nice. That would be nice. It's got a spa and Skype. What more do you need? Have a little spa, get all soft and loose. Watch American Pickers on Skype

where they go around sheds and find stuff. I assume that's still on Skype. Yeah, great. Great night there and then, you know, pop over the road to the Challenge service station and get a condom. Yes. They sell them in single bags.

First time, you've got to be safe. Please be safe Thanks for the advice Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley Guys I think Ram Raids are off the menu God they were a thing for a while weren't they They were a really big thing for a while

Yeah Bit of a trend in crime Because that's what you think about it There are crime trends Yeah And it's just like It's just like trends Trends People say it Yeah Bit of a trend in crime Because that's what You think about it There aren't crime trends Yeah Yeah babe It's all fashion It's just like

Trends Trends People say it They're like Oh yeah That's a crime And I do crime Yeah

I might do one of those crimes And then the media Talks about it Because the numbers go up And that just feeds more Into the trend It's exactly like Skinny jeans

It is The criminals are like What are you doing Wearing skinny jeans Yeah We're wearing baggy now. Oh, did you just do a ram raid? Yeah.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. How embarrassing. What is it, 2022? What are you, a virgin? We're doing text phone scams now. Yeah. Get on board.

Way less clean up. You can do it from the comfort of your own home. Yeah. Work your own hours and be a boss, babe. That is so shame. Ram raids? The reason I say I don't believe ram raids are on the menu is that when ram raids were happening,

the most stolen cars were always the Toyota Haqua, like the Vitz, the small cars, the Mazda Demios or the Mazda 2. Car one, producer Car one had an Aquadon chair and that got stolen and did that get ram-rated? Yeah, I think so. It was a suspected ram-rate. Did they take the catalytic converter? I actually don't know in the end.

It was a full write-off, so I've never looked, but maybe. Has the new boyfriend got a European car? Of course he does. It's probably an Audi or something, a Beamer. Mercedes? Probably a Beamer. Classic Mercedes. Classic Mercedes in a DA. Flirting off for nice dining. Classic Mercedes. Classic Mercedes energy, eh?

Flitting off for nice dining weekends in Wellington. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then eavesdropping on gossip. Yeah, I know. And coming back to the table and probably wiping his mouth with $100 bills. But he had a shirt, you know what I mean? Like a real nice shirt. A real nice linen shirt.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. He's got a mop of like hair. Just like a mop of... Yeah, he's got a lot of hair. He shakes it and it looks good. But that's money because he can afford the best hair products. I think it's a groom.

100%. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he's paying a fortune for a groom that makes it look like he hasn't had a groom. Oh, my God. Like, effortlessly disheveled. Certainly his car won't be on the most stolen cars. No, not the beautiful Mercedes SUV. Unless at his, you know, weekend escape in the Wairarapa High Country,

he has a Toyota Hilux. Is that the number one? The number one is a Toyota Hilux. Really? So Money Hub did this. They got all the police reports, stolen vehicle data over six months so that if your vehicle got stolen and you didn't report it because you're like, meh, at least it's gone,

then you're not on this list. But you didn't have insurance so it wasn't worth reporting it? Yeah, exactly. I think you still report it stolen because then if you don't, that number plate's still just associated to you. So you want to report it stolen. So 171 Hilux Utes were stolen between May and October this year. Are they easy?

Yeah. There are tons of them. But the new ones wouldn't be easy to steal. No, I wouldn't have thought so. But, man, Hiluxes go forever. I'd love a 1980s Hilux. Would you? Well, you know, remember that one where the old ad, Crumpy and Scotty jumped off the thing?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I do. Yeah, that, like, legendary old red Toyota Hilux ute. Yum. What are some of the other most stolen cars? Oh, yeah, they're pretty cool. The top four models were all commercial, like what a class as commercial vehicle. Hilux, then the Toyota HiAce van,

the Ford Courier and the Nissan Navara. Huh. How good's a HiAce, eh? HiAce van? Well, it's basically a Hilux, but it's a van. Yeah, look, we've all been in a high-ace maxi-taxi. Oh, 100%. And then you look and they're basically just assembly,

school assembly chairs just kind of bolted to the ground. Staple gun. It's the safety running on this thing. With your lap out on, you're definitely going to get cut in half if you hit anything. So if you've got a ute, bloody watch out. Get one of those steering wheel locks ASAP. Oh, they're pretty cool. Cut in half if you hit anything. So if you've got a ute, bloody watch out. Get one of those steering wheel locks ASAP.

Oh, they're pretty cool. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Pete Davidson, he has, he's dated Ariana Grande. Well, they were engaged. He dated Kate Beckinsale. He dated Kim Dale. Beckindale. Beckinsdale.

Beckinsdale. That's right. Beckinsale. Beckinsale. Is there no D in her name? Unbelievable. Is there not? All this time I've been calling her Beckinsdale Beckinsdale Beckinsdale That's right Beckinsale Beckinsale Is there no D in her name? Unbelievable Is there not? All this time I've been calling her Beckinsdale

No Beckinsale Is it Beckinsale? Yeah it is Well I apologise Thank you Apology immediately accepted I've been saying that wrong for like ever since

she was in that movie Pearl Harbour Yeah He dated Phoebe from Bridgerton for a bit Was her name Phoebe? Bridgerton for a bit. Was her name Phoebe? Something?

I don't know. Beautiful women. Yeah. And Pete Davidson, he's not an unattractive dude. He's just a goofy looking dude. He's not like your Hollywood hunk that you would imagine the likes of Kim K. Yeah. Kanye.

But do you know what I mean? Yeah. He doesn't look like your typical kind of hunky guy. And everyone's always been like, what's it all about? Now, everyone assumed, woohoo, what's it all about? Now everyone assumed, woohoo, and then it was not denied. But he's talked about it at length.

And he literally said, he will always, when he takes a beautiful woman out for a date, take her out to an amazing restaurant. Because even if I'm a shit date, they had a nice meal. That's his whole thing. He was like,

oh wow. That's my mom, that's my mom, that's what I do. He can afford to do that, though. 100%. Him and Carwen's boyfriend, those are the only two men that can afford to take their women out on beautiful, expensive meals. This we know. Yeah.

Now, I want to know, why do you get the honeys? Like, what is it about you that draws in either the opposite sex or whoever that you're looking for. Okay. Because there's got to be something. You must know, right? You'll know. The quads. Yeah, you'll be like.

Maybe someone's got the quads and they wear the rugby shorts because they know the quads. By the way, that works for both genders. It works for all. I saw at the gym the other day, a very rare sighting in 2024. Okay. A female gym goer in rugby shorts. And I was in Auckland, not Canterbury.

Yeah. Okay. I was not in the regions. The regions women will still wear, but Auckland is the home of the yoga pants. Maybe that's a trend coming back. We're going to ditch active wear and go to rugby shorts. Oh no, too thick for me.

Too chafey in the middle. No, but a lot of them aren't chafey material now. Not the thick. Because I'm thinking that canvas-y, like Canterbury. Canterbury rugby shorts. That's what she was wearing. Those ones that are like two different colours on each half. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Classics. I was like, wild. But maybe it's like, maybe you've got an Irish accent. And I'm not saying that you don't have a nice soul and a great face and a great personality, but you know me. If I hear an Irish accent, I'm a goner. Maybe it's your accent. Maybe it's goner. Maybe it's your accent, maybe it's your tattoos, maybe it's

your sense of humour, or maybe you've got a move or something. Like, what is it about you that always gets the honeys? Okay, well, this is what we want to know from you this morning. 0800 DALS at M. You can text through 9696. What do people find attractive about you?

We're taking this from anybody, by the way. It's just going to be really hard for people because we're Kiwis. We don't like to be like, it's not like I've got a bang and bod. It's like I've got a piercing or something. Or like I've got a tattoo and it just peaks below the sleeve. People will tell you. That's hard.

Or could it be someone's job? Like they're a cop or something. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? I'm immediately like Or could it be someone's job, like they're a cop or something? Yeah. Like that. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? I'm immediately, I'm immediately like. Or a firefighter. Yeah.

Oh, there you go. Got her again. Got her again. Someone just texted in, it's dem titties. I mean, whatever, whatever. If you know it. I mean, you know. You know it.

If you know. Okay, 0800-DARZEN, call us now. Text in 9696. What is it about you that always gets the honeys? We want to know, how do you nab the hubbies? Hubbies? Honeys? Wifeys?

How you get the honeys? Because Pete Davidson, he's always lured in the beautiful women, and people are like, why, why, why? He claims it's simply because he takes them to a nice restaurant. Other people claim it's because of another thing. Did you say before the show as well he does a movie as well? Yeah, yeah. Either a cinema or a meal so that

if his company is crap, at least they saw a nice film and had a nice meal. But what if they have to say bad film? What if he didn't read that Joker 2 is a musical? Yeah, but everyone knows that there's something like what it is in you that attracts people. Yeah, whether it's a feature.

Yeah. A thing that you do. Yeah, an accent, a job, a charisma of sorts. People are aware. People are aware. Because often you'll be told as well, people will be like, I really like your tattoos. Yeah, you know, you know. I really love your piercing eyes.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Speaking of eyes. Bright eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Bright eyes. Speaking of eyes, Danielle joins us. Good morning, Danielle. Good morning. How's it going?

Good. Have you got piercing eyes? Oh, I don't know about that, but I think a bit of eye contact goes a long way. You know the eye contact ratio of hanging in there? I'm terrible at eye contact. I don't like it. It is really hard, and it's really vulnerable, I think, is why people struggle with it.

But as soon as you want it, you give it a little bit of eye contact, and I feel it just... Wait, so you're giving vulnerable eye contact, not intense eye contact? It depends on the situation, I guess. She can do both. She can do both. You can do both. But you also, do you take breaks?

She's eye sexual. You are an eye sexual. Yeah, I don't discriminate. Just any eye contact. So you know about this because what people have given you feedback and said your eyes. Yeah, yeah. I've had the good eyes comment and just noting on,

well, not many people make that good eye contact, you know? Yeah, totally. It exudes confidence, you know? It does. Danielle, I can hear it through the phone. It works for you. It does. I can feel your eyes through the phone.

I love it. Danielle, thank you. Connor, what is the thing that gets the honeys for you? I'm a pretty good dancer. There he is. Okay. What kind of dancing are we doing, Connor? Particularly what has always worked is the West Coast Swing.

The West Coast Swing. Named after Westport. I don't think so. And you know when you get a bit boozy, you get a bit swayy. It's staggering down the street. How do you describe the West Coast swing? So it's like a twisty, twirly kind of dance where you get your hips and everything involved. Yeah, okay, hips.

Connor, as the male or the dominant dancer, do you take a lead? Or is it pretty neutral on who's in charge? No, and you just spin them around in real funky kind of ways and it always works. Aaron did this to me the first time I saw him after our first date. We went to this party and he just walked across the room and he pulled me onto the dance floor and he biffed me around

a bit. A bit of West Coast swag. He gave you the old West Coast swag. Now he's got a bad back. We're going to watch it. Now he's sort of sway. Connor, thank you. That was good though. Do you know what else? Connor's got a great voice. That would really draw me in,

personally. Somebody said, thank God for voice. He did, yeah. That would really draw me in, personally. Somebody said thank God for being Asian. Oh, okay. Asian gets the honeys. Asian gets the honeys. Someone said demios fit between bolines, but I think they're talking about when we were talking about ram raiding before, not so much what gets the honeys.

Although maybe demios get honeys because they can fit into tight spaces. I'm a masculine lesbian. Straight girls love me because I look boyish enough for them, but treat them better than a man. Yeah. I'm a masculine lesbian. Straight girls love me because I look boyish enough for them, but treat them better than a man. Wait, hang on a sec. Hayley needs a moment.

I feel so seen by that. Treat them better than a man and know how to please them in the middle of the day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, boy, oh, boy. That was amazing. That was amazing. Is that Hayley's perfect type that just texted in?

Yeah, she's just creepers. My new nose job, I was probably about a five or six on a good day, but now I reckon I'm pushing an eight or a nine. Probably worth getting punched in the face by the ex. What? Okay, a new nose, and now the honeys are just like... The new nose.

Have you ever seen someone... Maybe got washed up in rugby and stuff, and then this got it all sorted out. But have you ever seen someone and thought, God, what a sexy nose? Yeah, people have a good nose. I've got a cute nose. Like a button nose. Yeah, people have a good nose. I've got a cute nose. Like a button nose.

Yours is cute. So I'm just saying I've got some weird sexual energy that attracts much older, attractive, married women. Even when I was a young man. Right. They were attracted to me. Yeah, sort of, yeah. I risen with the tism.

Oh, nice. One more guy who tells me I'm not like the other girls. I swear it's on. Wow. Oh, I'm a blue-eyed tradesman who looks like the green arrow. That works. What's the green arrow? Oh, the green arrow.

It's a red amul. It's not amul, not trade. Your eyes lit up. No, I'm just kidding. Do you need any more trades doing at your trade? I'm happy to punch a hole in the wall. What kind of trade? I'm happy to cut a hole in the wall what kind of trade I'm happy to cut a pipe or a wire or whatever

what's the trade blue iron trading I'm happy to cut a pipe my lips I've been blessed with Angelina Jolie early 2000s lips oh wow

okay okay because they did look like they needed chapstick in that movie Gone in 60 Seconds yeah right oh I know

man they look chapped they look a little bit sore that was Gone in 60 seconds Yeah right Oh I know Man they look chapped Girl interrupted They look a little bit sore That was the chap lips Oh you're very chap lips Don't want to kiss those I've been told Multiple times

I have the sexiest nose I've ever seen on a woman I think about that often What makes a nose sexy Sexy nose What is sexy I've never looked at Nose and snort

Yeah Someone said Wide hips Big butt Big boobs Small waist Downside squishy belly Not a downside Yeah it's fun and snort. Someone said, wide hips, big butt, big boobs, small waist. Downside,

squishy belly. Not a downside. It's fun. Nice to touch. It's no downside. Small waist, squishy belly. That's good stuff. It's not a dream.

I'm very flexible. Well, that'll help. Somebody said, very flexible. It's my flexibility. Okay. Someone said,

nothing. There's got to be something. Come on. We're going through the list here. We're trying to make everybody feel better be something. Come on. We're going through the list here. We're trying to make everybody feel better about themselves. About yourself. I definitely get compliments on my tattoos. I'm heavily tattooed and I've got a bitchy resting face.

Guys seem to really like a challenge, but I'm not like a bitch. I just got this face. Well, there you go. Nothing person should get some tattoos. Yeah. Someone said my occupation, I'm a female class five truck and trailer driver. Never been hit on so many times in my life

and I'm fugly as. But as soon as I get out and they see a female climb out of the cab, it's game on. I'm sure you're not fugly. My partner has the Holy Trinity. Now I will go forward

and say this Holy Trinity is not everybody's Holy Trinity. Okay. My partner has the Holy Trinity. Top knot, nose ring, Johnny Depp goatee. Oh, you lost me on the third. I'll go full beard. Johnny Depp goatee, right, okay.

Tattoo of the last girlfriend is what the honey's like. What, because then they're like, I'll show you who's better. Yeah. Yeah, right. I'm six foot five. I'm fugly, but I'm packing. Now, there is the assumption at six foot five that you are packing.

That's why I'm glad I'm under six foot four. Yeah, right. Because at six foot four is that magical number where you're like, that guy's gonna have a massive wang. Now, at six foot two, I can get away with not having a massive wang. At six foot four, it's like it would be odd if you didn't. Yeah, yeah.

6'2", it's like, oh, okay. It's still in the middle. It's all right. It could go either way. It is not going to go the way you like. Oh, piercing blue eyes and long copper hair. What a combo. Big flaming red hair.

I've got great ankles. Okay. Oh, lovely. I've got great ankles. Okay. Oh, lovely. I've never really thought about ankles. Neither in this way, but from now on. Have a look. Definitely add it to the list of things. Yeah.

Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact is Moon Week. Loving it. Moon was out again this morning when I left home and I turned and I saw it and I said, hello, Moon. Shone me right in the eyes last night. Because we've got sheets as curtains in the bedroom. You should borrow some money

off Carlin's rich boyfriend. Oh my god, I actually could. He could lend me like a 10k to Curtin House. What are they called? Bridging Finance. Could he do some bridging finance? He's got a bit of coin rattling around. He's got cash. Yeah, I'll ask. I'll ask. Thank you. It might cost you a Wellington weekend at a highfalutin restaurant. Well, that's alright.

Happy. Worth it. Happy for that. If you've just joined the show, we've learned that someone in Carlin's boyfriend is loaded. Has she hard launched? She said boyfriend. We immediately pounced on that. We've learned more. He's very wealthy.

Drives a European car. Yeah. We're assuming a Lamborghini SUV. The worst of the Lamborghinis. I know, but if you're going to get one, it's an SUV. But yeah, the sheet was like that, like angled out. And I was facing it like this and the moon was just right in the face. Got you in the face.

Mooning me right in the face. Well, would you agree, sir and ma'am? Thank you. That when the moon is on the horizon, when it's rising, it looks bigger than when it's up in the sky. Yeah, fair call, yes. It looks bigger than up in the sky. It's closer. The moon illusion, this is the weird thing about it.

There's theories on why it happens, but nobody's settled on the exact reason. Why the moon looks bigger on the horizon. It is totally an illusion. They tested this by when it comes up over the horizon, it can be as simple as put your finger up and put the top of your finger on the top of the moon and put a little mark on your finger

and then when it's high in the sky do it again exactly the same really exactly the same but it gives the illusion that it's larger

it may be something to do called the Ponzo illusion yep it's like the Ponzi scheme oh I love Ponzo dipping sauce oh I went somewhere else you went different

the Ponzo illusion is an illusion discovered by Italian psychologist Mario Ponzo okay which might be the most it's it's Mario Ponzo and and illusion are discovered by Italian psychologist Mario Ponzo. Okay. Which might be the most Italian. Yes.

Yes. I'm Mario Ponzo. And I have a theory. It might be the most Italian sounding name of all time, Mario Ponzo. But basically, if there's two lines and they're going in like train tracks going to the distance, if you put exactly the same length line at the bottom and at the top, the one at the top looks bigger. Yeah, I've seen this before. But it's exactly the same.

Yeah. It's one of those illusions that just because of the change in two other lines, the brain automatically is like, well, of course that's bigger because it's over going over those lines and at the bottom it's not. So there's belief that it may be something to do with the Ponzo illusion, but they also think it's just our brains because when it's coming up over the horizon, we have something to compare it to.

It might be a tree or a house or a hill, and we know the size of that hill. Yes. But then when it's up in the sky with nothing in the foreground to compare it to, we lose that comparative measure. Does it have anything to do with the flatness of the earth? Oh, Hayley. Well, listen, I've been watching,

listen, I've been watching a lot of YouTube videos and a great podcast. Did you watch the YouTube video where the guy trying to prove the earth was flat proved without doubt that it's curved?

It was so good. It was such a simple experiment and then he's like, and now you should be able to see. A laser! Damn it. Something's gone wrong here. It's on the outside of gone wrong here I'm not quite

sure what's happened so good so apparently astronauts in space when they see the moon when they're at

the space station the moon comes around the earth it's the same they're like man it looks massive with the earth in the foreground

and then they see it come out and they're like now it looks small and nobody said it on the exact

so what you're saying is that the moon isn't actually fluctuating in size. Not at all. Man, you learn something new every day. I said it was like swelling. In ancient times, it was believed its circle around the earth was much more egg-shaped. Yes.

And it was close to earth when it was coming up over the side, and that's where you saw it. And then it went up in the night sky. They were so dumb back then, though. Man, okay. So fucking dumb. Thank God, as a planet, we're so much smarter now. Big light. You dumb apes. We're clever because we've got

internets. So today's fact of the day is that no one has a rock solid reasoning on why the moon looks bigger when it's rising. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. I believe available to public on Thursday, Wicked.

Yeah. Which is, of course, the film of the very famous Broadway musical about the origin story of the witches from The Wizard of Oz. The press for this has been insane. They won't stop crying. Yeah, they actually won't. Who's crying? The two leads. Oh, they actually won't. The sweetest thing. Who's crying? The two leads.

Ah, right. Why are they crying? With happiness. Just with, like, love and passion and joy. They've obviously had a life-changing experience filming this together. Right. Well, the New Zealand premiere of the movie was last night. Yeah.

Oh, my God. It was a who's who of New Zealand media. Yeah, that's why we were there. Our very own Carwen and Shannon. I was her date, don't worry. Yeah, you're right. It was insane. It was so beautiful. They had free manicures. There was bubble tea.

There was bubbles. It was so fun. There was a yellow carpet, right? As in yellow brick road? Yeah. It was brick road too, like patterns to look like it. We can't talk about the movie it's um it's embargoed is the are the monkeys in it oh my god don't get me started don't from the you remember the monkeys in it yes the wizard of oz she talked about the movie no no they're in the trailer they're in the trailer i think she's worth are they yeah but i

hate monkeys so much and they were just just so... What kind of monkeys? We're monkeys. Cappuccino monkeys? No, not cappuccino monkeys. I love cappuccino monkeys. I'm losing my mind. That's like the one on Friends. When they flew, and I saw that movie when I was a kid,

and she was like, fly, my pretties, and then they were sort of flying, and I was like, no! I had nightmares about the flying monkeys. Oh, well, sure enough. You're going to love it then. Yeah, I literally was like, couldn't look, and at that point it was getting quite late, and it was too much, and, well, sure enough. You're going to love it then. Yeah, I literally was like, couldn't look and at that point it was getting quite late

and it was too much and I said, come on, I was like, I can't, because I have a fear of monkeys and then chuck on some wings, I'm done. It's a lot.

It's bedtime. Can I ask one question that I'm really curious about because Cynthia and Ariana did their singing live on the soundstage as opposed to pre-recording to perfection

and then lip syncing. The last film that did this to just an absolute abysmal result was Les Miserables. We'll never forget hearing that. Is the singing good? Yes, it's not at all like Les Mis.

Because that was so bad. And shout out to our boy Russell, but Russell Crowe really probably should have gotten a booth, I think. And we could have tweaked some knobs, do you know what I mean? To just help him along a little bit. No, Ariana and Cynthia are already incredible singers. Yeah, they're literally amazing.

So that's not a problem at all. Right, so it's a great movie. Oh my God, go see it. It's long because it's based off of a musical. Yes. But it's worth every second. I always think this, like when they do movie versions of musical theatre, because in the musical theatre,

you have a big half, at the halftime mark, they do a big song, curtain comes down, we have a wee, and top up our bubbles. Then we come back and then we do another big song,

second half. They should just do it in the movies. I mean, I guess that's what this next, I think it's a year and a bit is, because the second part's not out yet. Yeah. Wow. Did they film it all at once?

I was thinking that last night. I assume that they have, surely. Because those are the best ones where it's like two or three parts, but they film it all at once. Yeah, yeah, so they're just sitting on it. Because then if there's kids in it, they all of a sudden... They don't have beards. They have those awful childish mustaches.

But this is the new, they're calling it the new Barbenheimer. Yeah, it felt like that too. Like it's... Yeah, because it's up against... These people are either going to go see this

or Red One, the Santa story about the wrong Christmas in Australia. No, no, no. Gladiator 2, darling. No, actually, Gladiator 2 is...

I'll be seeing both. Yeah, we're going back to watch Wicked again on Thursday. That's how much we both enjoyed it. Yeah, I'm going to go. I'm going to go watch Wicked again On Thursday That's how much We both enjoyed it Yeah I'm gonna go I'm gonna go for sure

Thanks for the invite I am imagining With the price of movie tickets Carwin's rich boyfriend Must be coming Oh can he get me a ticket He gets chalk tops All round

I think that's how They got to the premiere Last night He's one of the producers Oh that's how he makes his money He's a Hollywood producer That's why he's driving A Lamborghini

Yeah yeah Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley Fletchborn and Hayley. Fletchborn and Hayley, silly little pole, silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Silly little pole, do you wear undies under your togs? Yes or no?

No, never What if you were wearing Shorty shorts swimming And you wore bikini bottoms underneath Yeah, if I When I used to wear Shorts or board shorts You'd always have bottoms on underneath Yeah, I wouldn't raw dog a pair of shorts.

I find it odd when men leave their undies on with a pair of board shorts or swimming trunks. Well, you've got it. The perfect swimming shorts are the ones with the little mesh. A nice soft mesh lining. Soft mesh, though. You don't want to grate the boards. No, no. Board shorts, I don't know.

I haven't owned board shorts for years, but there was a period of time where it happened. Shut up, you're with them every day, down to the knee. Great, yeah, I do. And your eight knees, with your eight knees. And your DC skate shoes. Yeah. Well, I'm going to go to the Vic Park skate park after this, and I'm going to do some kickflips.

Yeah. 92% of people said no, they don't wear undies under their togs. 8% of people said yes. Do you, Vaughan? Yes. Yes. Because I don't buy togs. I just wear shorts I've got.

Yeah, you're right. Not jorts. I wouldn't wear my jorts in the ocean. But just like sports shorts or something waiting to happen. Even if I were in a pair of shorts, I'd just tie them up tight and just... No undies. No undies. It's too restricting.

It's too... Yeah. And then you've got wet undies are the worst. Yeah. Yeah. And then do you have to have another pair of fresh undies to put your jeans back on? Exactly, yeah.

You just take them off. Well, Mason agrees. Why on earth would I want wet, soggy cotton around the boys? Just buy a good set of decent lined boardies. 8% of people said yes, they do wear undies under their toes. 92% said no. Yes, when wearing board shorts with no liner, I wear boxes underneath to keep the chap in check.

If wearing netted or lined board shorts, no. Okay. Yeah, yeah. So it likes a little bit of cupping. Yeah. Lovely. Cradling, we'll call it. My togs are just swim shorts, says Hayley,

so usually togs or undies under them. Oh, yeah. So she's in some shorts. You're just doubling up. Yeah, I know. Emma says, ooh, that would feel weird, wouldn't it? Yeah. Oh, you haven't lived, Emma. At least give it a shot. Only in desperate situations, says Hannah, would I find myself with undies under my togs. Carl said, I need to keep the eel well kept in somehow.

Wow, congrats. Yeah, congrats to you and to those who celebrate. Watch out for those eel traps. Yeah, congrats to you and to those who celebrate. Watch out for those ill traps. Yeah, the hinaki. The hinaki. Yeah. Alex says, once at the kids' pool, I ripped my shorts and I was glad I was wearing something underneath. Oh, yeah, that'd be horrible.

Save an accident with exposure. Were you ever exposed? No. As a kid, you know, in an embarrassing moment? Thank God, no. No, neither. No, I never had a down trail go askew either when someone was trying to give you the pant.

Oh, yeah. And the whole thing came. The whole undies came down. Oh, my God. And I grew up in the 90s when silk boxes were the preferred method of underpant. It could have happened so easily. So easily.

It's just elastic and satin. And Tasmanian Devil. And Bart Simpson, yeah. It feels weird, says Dylan. I've tried it, but it does feel weird. I thought this would be more common. Now I'm embarrassed that I admitted to wearing undies under my dogs, says Taylor. That's okay, Taylor.

And Greer said, too much washing. Yeah, that's extra washing. It's a woman who's being economical with her washing. She doesn't need an extra pair of undies getting in there and taking up all of that room that aunties famously do. All that room. All the room. Got a whopping set of knickers on you.

That's a silly little part. Oh, another one in the bag. It's a Versace bag as well. If you enjoyed that, give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell your mates. You don't sound sincere there, boy. I'm just reading what's written here. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley.