ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 21st October 2024

Episode Date: October 20, 2024

Woman found out her engagement ring is from Temu Are skinny jeans back? Top 6: Other tourist attractions that need a podcast Hayley got bombarded with show lesbians SLP - Do you think you would pass your drivers license nowadays Using chatgpt to win arguments Hayley's Sweatshop Liam Payne update Who did you rip the fingers too? Vaughan's favour for an old friend Seeing your partner get hit on makes you love them less What's your go-to way to brighten your day?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Play Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley on ZM. Thank you Bryn. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Vaughan's just trying to get on the new, we've got new Wi-Fi networks.

We do. Authenticating to network? Yep. Continue. Click OK. Do I trust? And look up there, we've got a big shiny new router on the ceiling.

I didn't realise the Wi-Fi was such a problem before. Well, apparently this is even better. This is even better. But do you know, if you want Wi-Fi on your phone, you've got to download an app. Yes, you square that. I hate that.

Hayley's a bit worried about that. Oh, no. Yeah, because remember, I only recently in the past month learned that work has the ability to see what you're doing on your phone. No, no, no. Only if you're using data. Data. Which I often am.

But this app, this feels like a Trojan horse. It does. Get out of my personal space. Now they're in there. They're in there, yeah. Yes, it's their phone and they pay for it. I'm a gentleman. I look at porn on an iPad.

Yeah. You're distinguished. You're classy. Yes, I am. You're a classy man. I'm somewhat of a distinguished gentleman. I tip my hat to you, good sir. Top six coming up.

Top six other tourist attractions that need a podcast. That's today's top six. Because did you know that Auckland Museum have a podcast? Auckland Museum podcast, it's called Amped. That would be, well, I guess they've got a lot of interesting stories. Yeah, they do. They've got stories to tell. They've got good stuff.

I would love to not spend a night at the stories to tell. They've got good things. They've got good stuff. I would love to not spend a night at the museum. Scary. I'd get scarred. I'd get scarred. I want to have a look in the basement.

Do you know they've got a basement full of stuff? Do they? That'd be cool. Auckland Museum. Please invite us to have a look through the basement.

A rummage through the basement. Rummage. I'd love a little rummage. You might not like it. And maybe there might be a couple of things they're looking to get rid of and you like your curiosities. Ohmage. I'd love a little rummage. You might not like it. And maybe there might be a couple of things they're looking to get rid of and you like your curiosities.

Oh my God. Maybe they've got a bit of taxidermy down there. They would. Dude, 100%. Their taxidermy's next level. They've got a big fat penguin taxidermied in there.

I think it's still on display. Do they? Lovely. So all their... Elephant's a bit scary. Their kiwi and their morn, obviously. Right.

Those are fake. Tonga. Oh, I thought you meant they were a treasure. They wouldn't just be giving those out. No. Oh, yeah. I probably wouldn't have a taxidermy moor in my house anyway. A little bit tougher.

I've got that high stud in the middle of the house. I've got a high stud. We could sit it on that side of the lounge. Were they three metres? I'm a 3.1. Oh, you've got enough room then. Yeah, you could too. We're actually all rocking a high stud.

And then at Christmas. We are doing quite well for ourselves. When it comes to the stud. We're actually all rocking a high stud. And then at Christmas. We are doing quite well for ourselves. When it comes to the stud. We are the show for lesbians. Yeah. We are the show for Sri Lankans. Yes. And we're now also the show for people with a high stud.

A high stud. Nice, man. Fantastic. Hard to hate, but just really enjoyable to be in. Nightmare when the spiderwebs are up in that corner. Yeah. Big Christmas trees all around. Also, on the show after 8.30, I ran 8.30 this morning.

What is it? Is it on 8.30 or is it around 8.30? It depends how long you take with Fact of the Day. Today's, this week's Fact of the Day theme, you want to know it early? Yes, please. Cars. Facts about cars. About cars.

Quite broad. Someone sent me a very interesting fact about what animals have killed the most humans. Spoiler, mosquitoes by a mile. And then they were like, you should do death the fact of the day. I was like, this is morbid. No, no, no. Very morbid. It was a great suggestion, but very

morbid. Well, after fact of the day, your chance to get to Jingle Ball New York. This is the iHeartRadio Jingle Ball, Madison Square Gardens. I think it's Jingle Bail, isn't it? JJ's fan, he's locked up for the week. No, that's something different, Vaughan. Is it?

Yeah. She doesn't do that. We can't steal all her segments. She's not doing that at the moment. Benson Boone, Tate McRae, Gracie Adams, Teddy Swins, Katy Perry, Meghan Trainor and more. It's always a huge concert. Fun, man.

Jingle Ball. I'll see you a chance to get there at 8.30 this morning. Next on the show. Always a happy, exciting moment when you get proposed to as someone who has been proposed to before. Yeah. But one woman made a startling discovery about her proposal. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

Well, a Sheila who's in a long-term relationship, was finally proposed to by her partner and she's shared a bit of an experience on Reddit. Yep. Because she got the ring, nice, sparkling, you know, solid rock-looking thing and was absolutely elated. But bells were ringing when a few days later she was sort of asking a few questions about the ring, like where's it from or how did you pick it?

How did you know my size? Yeah, how did you size me? And he was sort of dodging them. There is a trick to getting the perfect ring size. Did you use this trick or did you just say to your wife, now wife, what size are you? No, I remembered she tried something on, I think like a while before we were engaged.

But this isn't my trick. Can I guess your trick? Yep. You serve sausages every night. Yeah. And you just slip a ring on the sausage. You put the sausage under her finger until a ring on the sausage. No, you put the sausage under her finger

until you find the right sausage. A beer chipolata. You would hope it'd be a chipolata. Is it not that? That's genius though actually. To anyone listening

who's thinking of proposing, that's a great one. Yeah, grab their hand and you say, can I see your ring finger? Yep. And then you pop it in your mouth

and then you pull it out your mouth. Pull it out. Hold it off exactly like that. Hold your mouth exactly the same size. Jump in the car, go straight to the drillers. Stick that ring stick in my mouth. The ring stick in your mouth and wherever it goes into. That's the size ring.

Right. She's an R. Wow. Yeah, yeah. Great. Yeah. Aaron bought got a ring sizer delivered and put it on my finger. So you were just like. A ring size delivered. The ring sizer. Yeah.

Right. So that was a dead giveaway then. Yeah, and it was still too big. Right. Interesting. Anyway. See if he it was still too big. Right. Interesting. Anyway. See if he'd used the mouth trick. Yeah, if he'd gone to Michael Hill or Pascos.

Straight in. You want to get it to the bit where the ring sits, right? Okay, let's go to the grocery. And then have your mouth out there. Yeah, that's perfect. Okay, well, I don't think he did a size thing. So she was asking, and then she asked the question, is it a diamond or a moissanite?

You know, like a crystal, a fake diamond. Oh, right, yeah. Not that she, she said mainly out of curiosity. I can't tell the difference. No, no one can. No one can. No one can. Who cares?

And he said, oh, he didn't know. He said, I'll have to look it up and he got to open his phone and she looked over to see that he had opened the Timu app and I'm telling you, if you need to open the Timu app to find out if it's a diamond or a rock. So this ring must have been at least $35

or he had to pay $30 and then buy something worth $5. And then buy a few other things. It was $38. Or he had to pay $30 and then buy something worth $5. And then buy a few other things. It was $38. Oh, God. And she sort of said, oh, did you get it from Timo? And he was like, what does it matter?

And sort of got a bit annoyed. What does it matter? You spent $38. Well, her thing was like, I'm not trying to be, I'm not trying to ask for more than I think that he could have afforded because he earns around $200,000 a year.

And he's buying a $38 Timu ring? Yeah, sort of feeling like the frugal nature of his purchase maybe didn't, you know, he could have spent $500 maybe. You can get nice rings for a couple of hundred bucks. Yeah. $38 maybe for an engagement ring. Anyway, she said it hasn't been resolved. She said that

she's been having a number of conversations but they've been really tense and he actually suggested to her, well you can pick out a new ring but you have to pay for it yourself. And so people are commenting on here being like, he sounds tight ass. He sounds like a tight ass. But also if he had

just come out and said, hey, this isn't, you know, it's not an expensive ring. It's not about that for me. You know, it's about the promise and da-da-da-da-da. But it's more that he was being a bit sneaky about it, being, oh, I'm not sure if it's a diamond or not. Look, it's from Timo. It's not a diamond.

It's not a diamond. My king, you could have absolutely said, yes, it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where'd you get it from? Pascoe's. Is it a diamond? Hell yeah, babe. 10 carats. I didn't keep the receipt because this is for everyone. Where'd you get it from? Pasco's. Is it a diamond? Hell yeah, babe. 10 carats.

I didn't keep the receipt because this is for everyone. You're not taking it back. We're in this long haul. See that? You've nailed that. You have nailed that. Because I'm a piece of shit.

You are a piece of shit. I'm a cheap piece of shit. ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Okay, do you know what I've just seen? Interesting. Apparently, okay. Do you know what I've just seen? Mmm, interesting. Apparently, this is fashion news because as you know, fashion is my passion. It is. Fashion is my fashion.

You're wearing a vest today. I actually am wearing a sleeveless blazer. Yeah, it's a blazer with the sleeves cut off. Now, do the sleeves come cut off or was that a job? No, no, no. Bought it cut off. Bought it cut off. But I feel like I didn't pay less than a blazer.

Yeah, but you got less material. I got less material. I almost feel like saying a country... Is this a country ride, I think? It's like when I see bikinis and they cost more than board shorts. It's like there's so much more material than a board short. Yeah, but there's a lot of science behind a good bikini. Bikini?

Are board shorts still like $85, $90? I don't know. Because that was ridiculous. I don't wear board shorts. I don't know. Because I'm a man over 40. I've got no business in board shorts still like $85, $90? I don't know. Because that was ridiculous. I don't wear board shorts. I don't know. Because I'm a man over 40. I've got no business in board shorts. I don't want anyone.

I mean, surfers still wear board shorts, right? What, to the knee? They're not comfortable to wear. No, you've got to wear spares. No, you can get a bit. Yeah. Huh? No.

No, like short, short shorts. Yeah, shorter shorts at the beach. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's where it's at. I'm looking at it. Got some rip curl. And you've got to have a bit of mesh in there. Because you don't want a rogue ball. I just straight up wear und beach. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's where it's at. I'm looking at it. Got some rip curl. And you've got to have a bit of mesh in there. Because you don't want a rogue ball.

I just straight up wear undies. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The vibrant, shorter swim trunk seems to be the go-to. Yes, vibrant, shorter swim trunk. That's the way to go. I want to see half of your thigh. Half of your thigh behind a series of colourful, drippy skulls.

Yeah, why not? Is that a bright year?ful drippy skulls. Yeah, lovely. Is that a bright year? I'm into that. In fashion, my passion. Yeah, I wanted to wear shoulder pads today. Do you know why? I'm having a bit of a flea bag today. I woke up and it looked just incredible.

You know that thing when it's your mum's funeral? She's like, this is terrible. I look great. That was me this morning. That's why I was running late. I was just staring at myself. Is she going to make another one of those? No.

She's not. But that was the perfect ending. It'll pass. I know. You went that way. Great show. Can we get back to fashion, please? Yep.

Thank you for acknowledging my blazer. My half blazer. Okay, apparently, in fashion news, breaking news, skinny jeans are back. Now, as you all know, skinny jeans were the only jeans that we wore for a number of years. Yep. And then baggy jeans kind of came in, mom jeans, but we kept the skinny around. And then it was a hard no last year.

Skinny jeans, they're done. They're out. They're old. They make you look like a millennial. How embarrassing. Quick turnaround. Quick turnaround. They're back.

And do you know who's leading it? The Royals. Really? Yeah. Catherine, she's been seen in her jeans, her skinny jeans, and everyone's like, they are nice. They're a nice fit. Those are lovely.

Those are a lovely jean. And also. So they'll sell out. Her sister-in-law, Megan, has been. Pippa's been quiet lately. Remember Pippa Middleton? Oh, all I remember about her is that badonkadonk at the wedding. Remember?

She wore that Alexander McQueen gown with the buttons all down the back. Anyway, Megan's been wearing skinny jeans again, made by none other than Anini Bing. Panini Bing. Yeah, I know. So we're not talking a cheap Jane. Remember when I showed you those leather pants from Anini Bing? They were $1,000

at that shop. No, I don't. When was that? No, they were shorts! Leather shorts. Remember I was trying on that dress when we were in the mount and you guys were in the dressing room I tend to blank

I'd erase that was a great moment for all of us it was a really fun day yeah no it wasn't I tried on clothes and you guys sat in the dressing room

and then we went and sat outside you went and sat outside it was horrible there's a pair of leather shorts there and they were a nini bing and they were a thousand dollars

and you were both aghast that's ridiculous. That's so stupid. Well, it's that kind of, it's very like posh British style, like a knee-high boot, skinny jean tucked in, or a ballet flat with a blazer. That kind of like high-end, I'm from money, honey. It blows my mind because these will sell out now.

People see the Royals and something and they think, I must have that. That's wild to me. I've never seen them wearing anything. Queen Elizabeth II

was selling out her bloody... Yeah, she sold out those frocks. Yeah, she did. But have you ever seen a celeb or someone you follow and you've been like, I want to buy that?

You'd buy a cowboy hat. Style-wise. I'd buy a cowboy hat but that's without a celebrity endorsement. I'd love a big 10-gallon hat. You'd just love a-wise. I'd buy a cowboy hat, but that's without a celebrity endorsement. I'd love a big 10-gallon hat. You'd just love a big one. I'd just love it. Well, yeah.

Who's telling you this? Hello. Well, skinny jeans are back. And like you say, whenever the Royals wear something like this, a panini bing pair of skinny jeans, they'll sell out in a heartbeat. Do you know, I've actually just given up on jeans. When was the last time you saw me in jeans? A'll sell out in a heartbeat. Do you know, I've actually just given up on jeans. When was the last time

you saw me in jeans? A long time ago. Yeah, years ago. I don't wear pants anymore. Me and pants, we don't get on. Just skirts and dresses. Right.

I'm not here for jeans. I like jeans. They're rigid and stiff and they cut you off everywhere. I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. Try a bigger size jean, I reckon. If it's going to be me.

I'm a 10, man. Always have been. I've never changed. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the Top 6. Kilda. Kilda. And welcome to the Top 6. Lovely to be here. Kia ora. Kia ora.

And welcome to the top six. Lovely to be here. Thank you for inviting us. Oh, thank you for attending. I've been getting ads for this podcast. I simply must give that a listen. Okay. I did so much yard work over the weekend,

I depleted my podcasts. Oh, no. Follow lots of podcasts. And sometimes I get, oh, no, there's so many to catch up on. And then a few days outside laboring, boy, I'll catch up on podcasts. What about a good audio book? Nah. Like a book that you'd want to read and they just read it to you.

I tried that with Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Yeah. It's literally a podcast, Vaughan. Yeah, so it's a big, long podcast. But someone reads your book. Yeah, I know, but it was Stephen Fry and his voice was so relaxing, I had to sleep. Keep going to sleep.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I wasn't doing something. I just like podcasts. I love podcasts. That and Chapel Roan are about the only thing I've listened to on Spotify this year. Yeah.

Because I'm a hip. Cool. I don't know if you guys know this, but I'm pretty hip and cool. You are very hip and cool. All the hippest and coolest people make sure that people know. Know that they're hip and cool. They have very hip and cool. All the hippest and coolest people make sure that people know. Know that they're hip and cool.

They have to say it as well. By listening to Chapel Rowan. Yeah. Yep. I think I'm saying that right. I hope I'm saying that right. Chapel Rowan. Chapel Rowan.

Okay, so there's three episodes so far of the Auckland Museum podcast. Soldier Curator Monuments Man. That's an episode about the life and work of Sir Gilbert Archie, who ran the museum from 1924 to 1964. Wow. 100 years since he started it. Sounds like a fascinating man. It does.

A Night of the Orange, which is about the Orange Ballroom on Newton Road, which was an iconic Auckland music venue. And Brick by Brick, about the Lego exhibition that's there, Rallex. That's amazing. You'd love that. I did. I've been. The only problem was

I was trying to look at it and children kept getting in the way. I hate that. That's what I hate about Rainbow's End. Children in the way. Get out of my way. I'm just trying to enjoy my day.

I know night rides at Rainbow's End was a bit targeted towards people who wanted to go there and smooch their lovers. I became for an RAT night at Rainbow's Inn. Yeah.

Oh, no, but you're not having drinks. Yeah. And then getting hurdled around. Yeah, I have a whiskey on the log flim. How distinguished. Distinguished gentleman. Whiskey on the log flim. Anyway, that's that podcast.

But I've got the top six other tourist attractions in Aotearoa, New Zealand that need their own podcast. Fantastic. Number six on the list. You can see it from the museum, and the museum can see it. Skytel. Yeah.

Do you think it's got many episodes in it, though? Yeah, every episode starts with a ride up the big lift with someone who hates lifts and is scared of heights. Yes. And they're like, and then you're like, look through the glass. No.

Stand on the glass. Stand on the glass. And then you take them to stand on the glass. No. Stand on the glass. Stand on the glass. And then you take them to stand on the glass. It makes me feel dizzy thinking about it. And then the following like 20 minutes is like, where's our house? Where's our house? You can see our house. Where's our house from here?

You must be able to see our house. Can't see my house from here. God, the roofs are really dirty, aren't they? This place, this city's a shit hole for a bird's eye view. This is actually yuck. There are some roofs in this city that need to clean. Yeah, there are.

In all seriousness, I'm willing to take it on as a water blasting aficionado. Do you know, if I may sidebar, please sidebar. I drove past a house

the other day that's been renovated and they had a tiled roof and I was like, that's a bit of a shame, the tiled roof. And then I came back the next day

and it was corrugated. It was like, I was a roof whisperer. So they heard me criticise that tiled roof and they replaced it. You should say what a shame it would be if Wanda didn't win Lotto on Wednesday. With my powers. Yeah.

It works in my favour. Say it. Well, I've sort of bought a ticket. Do you know what I mean? And even though we've got a deal on and I will honour the deal, the lion's share. My preference would be that I would get that. Can you believe this?

Can you believe this? I can't believe you're not using your power for good. And the good is my greed. No, I'm just saying that I hope that Hayley wins Lotto. No, you can't say I hope Hayley wins Lotto. What a shame it would be. This is how your power works. It's very specific.

What a shame it would be if Hayley didn't win Lotto. What a shame it would be if Hayley didn't win Lotto. What a shame it would be if Hayley didn't win Lotto on Wednesday. Now, you just got $2 million richer. Yeah. And I got a hell of a lot richer. Yeah. Are we giving each other $2 million? We're over the $30.

No, we're not. Yes, it's $30. It's up to $30. Yeah. Goodness. $2 million each. Okay. I'll give you $2.

I think I could survive on $26. I could scrape by. I would manage on $ on 26. I could scrape by. I would manage on 26 mil. Number five on the list of the top six other tourist attractions that need a podcast. That's right. You're in the top six. Slight sidebar. Oh, we're back.

Return to the mainstream. The Waitomo Glowworm Caves. I think that's a lot of this. Any noise scares the glowworms. I don't know if there's many episodes in that podcast. Glowworms. Now we'll go to the glowworms for comment. Oh, no.

The ones that hang from the roof are called stalactites because they're holding on tight. T for top. T for top. T for top. That's how I remember stalactites because they're holding on tight. T for top. T for top. T for top. That's how I remember stalactites. B for bottom. Yeah, something like that.

They're mighty mountains. This is a shit podcast. This is a shit podcast. Join us for episode two where we go outside and it's light and it really, you're just like shit, it's bright out here. It's too, it's like, oh, God, my eyes. It's so great.

Short podcast season. Short podcast. And that's it. It's just two eps. Number four on the list of the top six other tourist attractions that need a podcast

are Aoraki Mount Cook. We'll call it the summit and we just leave a microphone recording at the summit. And so when people get to the top, they're like,

shit, it's high up here. Yeah. And it's just like a little bit of a undercover, what do they talk about when they get there? Fly on the wall.

Yeah, I'm imagining it's fairly, a lot of talk about the view. Yeah. A lot of talk about the view. Beautiful view.

Along the same lines, but at sea level, number three on the list of the top six other tourist attractions that need a podcast, New Chums Beach Podcast. Oh, okay.

Oh, I'm there this weekend. Beautiful. That's what it is. It's people's reaction when they first see New Chums, which is often said the most beautiful beach in the country. But the episode one has to be the bloody hike across the rocks to get there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the drive to Thames Coast.

Are we going the right way? Yeah. Do you think we can just pull over for a bit? It's curvy. It's curvy. And then the angle when some of the camper pull over for a bit I'm just it's curvy it's curvy and then the angle when some of the camper van gets in front of you and then it's really slow

I'm going to try to swim this weekend no matter what every every labour day we go to New Chums yeah and we swim

good and some summers some springs it's been really warm right global warming warmer seas what a blessed thing.

Number two on the list of the top six other tourist attractions that need a podcast, Christchurch Cathedral. Oh yeah. The rebuild. But.

It's hosted by the pigeons that are living in there that don't want the rebuild to happen. Because when it gets fixed they're going to need to find a new place to live. Right.

And people will then see the side of the story from the pigeons who are like, sure, people call us pests and we're shitting on everything, but it's finally central,

affordable central living for a pigeon. And then it makes you feel bad. Right. And you're a bit of a, man, am I a nimby? Yeah, maybe. And then you end

and you're like, I get it, man. I get it, pigeons. Change your view on pigeons. Number one on the list of the top six other tourist attractions that need a podcast. I just Goog, pigeons. Change your view on pigeons. Number one on the list of the top six other tourist attractions that need a podcast. I just googled New Zealand tourist attractions. This one was right up

there. Amersfield, darling. Darling. Oh, darling. The corn fritters, darling. We sit down with the chef Vaughan Mabey and we talk about what wacky thing are you going to serve this week, Vaughan? Is that a duck head? A delicious crisp wine. That would be so lovely. And then we have a lovely wine.

Lovely wine and we talk to some of the guests. Darling. Lovely. What are you liking about New Zealand so far? It's just, for me, it's the climate. It's beautiful and temperate. Thank you very much for joining us at the Amersfield Podcast. What are you drinking in your wine glass?

That's Chardonnay. Hey. Chardonnay. Chardonnay. Chardonnay. I'm having a Pinot Noir. Lovely. And you, sir, you're enjoying a? Sister Bourbon.

Oh, my God. Imagine going to Amersfield and asking for a Bourbon and Cola. How un-cute. Chip and Beam and Cola. Yeah. Full strength. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

Do you know what's interesting actually? Because I performed in Palmerston North, well in Ashurst actually to be specific over the weekend with Benjamin Hurley. As I instructed, go to the Ashurst Cemetery and see both sides of my family. Why would anybody... I'm sorry, I didn't pay them a visit.

I'm so sorry. Really? Yeah, I didn't. You go there, you got the McElroys, you got the Smiths. We drove to the venue, did the gig, and then drove back to Parmy.

You didn't stop by the cemetery? Didn't stop by the cemetery. I'm pretty sure my nan's grandfather is buried there. Well, I just see I didn't go looking for him. I didn't go looking for your nan's grandfather. Really? You didn't come up after the gig? Your great, great grandfather. Get your iPhone torch out and wander through

the cemetery. No, I didn't. It's crazy that he didn't do that. Yeah, that is interesting. I've got a feeling Hans Christofferson might be buried there too. Oh, I'm so, I didn't even go looking. How dare you? I know. But do you know what was really lovely?

Leaving? It was a good bit. It was a lot of lovely ZM listeners there in the morning. And one chick said to me, I listen to you every single morning. And I said, what time are you listening in general? She said about 7.50 till about 8.30. And I said, you should give six a try. And here we are. And boy, aren't we having

fun. And she's sleeping. She's sleeping through all this. She's sleeping through all this good stuff. I told her, I said you've got to try the six o'clock hour. That's where we're loosey goosey. We're just waking up to start the day. Things go a bit rogue. And then, so it was every, sort of periodically people coming up and saying lovely things about our show, our little radio

show. And then I will say I was, I don't know whether to say swarmed or bombarded. Okay. By, may I use the term, a gaggle. Okay. Of lesbians. Oh, wow. And they said to me, good morning from your lesbian listeners, which, you know, as you know, we love to give them their own individual greeting in the morning.

Well, yeah. And good morning to you. Number one show for lesbians in the country. They said that. Number one show for lesbians in the country. They said that. Number one show for lesbians. And we had a lovely photo and a cuddle and such lovely lesbian listeners we've got on our hands here. Yeah, yeah, lovely.

I was going to say, a gaggle of gays kind of covers both males and females. It was a gaggle of gays. But if it was purely lesbians, we might be looking for another collective noun. Oh, you give us some options. A lamentation of gags. But if it was purely lesbians, we might be looking for another collective noun. Oh, you give us some options. A lamentation of lesbians. A lamentation of lesbians. A library of lesbians.

I like lamentation. A litter of lesbians. No, not a litter. A litter of kittens. Because then it's alliteration, isn't it? Yeah. A loft of lesbians. A lump of lesbians.

What? Okay, let's not say a lump of lesbians. A leash, a leap, a labour. No, I like lamentation of lesbians. What? Okay, let's not say a lump of lesbians. A leash, a leap, a labour? No, I like lamentation of lesbians. Okay. I was swarmed by a lamentation of lovely local lesbians. And good morning to them. They just wanted to get their own individual...

We're just backing up the fact that we are the number one show for lesbians. Number one. Right. I think when they do all the sort of, you know, like testing of radio, that they should do like a lesbian special questionnaire, and we would prove it. Well, they don't even need to.

It's a vibe. I'm running purely on vibes. Well, the vibes have been proven in Ashurst. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Silly little poe. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole.

Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Would you, dear listener, pass your driver's license if you retook it today? Retook it? Is that a word? Retook?

Retake it. Retaken. Reset it. Resetted. Retook. Hold on. Let me just say. Retook.

Sad passes. Yeah. There was a study out of the US that found that only 25% of people, or sorry, 25% of people thought they would fail if they had to redo it today. And that's kind of our results as well. I'd be alright,

I reckon. It would trip you up on the little things, like the lazy habits you pick up, like the... What to do when you drive past a horse.

Do you remember that question? Yeah. You're like, why? What does it matter? Name all the hazards. Name all the hazards. And you put that thing like? Name all the hazards. Name all the hazards. But the thing,

name all the hazards. Everything's a hazard. I know, that's why I failed. It's a driveway. That tree could fall down. A person could run in front of a car. If a kiwi bird ran out,

I'd have to slam all my brakes because that is an endangered species. But if it was a possum, floor it. It would be the habits like rolling through a stop, you know,

where you don't come to a complete stop. Or when you're at a four-way giveaway, like who's going and da-da-da-da-da. Yeah. Yeah, maybe. Yeah.

Or flooring it up a gravel road up to Kadrona Ski Field. Like absolutely flooring it out of the corners and then flying into them and then heavy braking. With no respect for the lives in the back of the car. No, you'd accelerate into corners. You don't. Do you not watch the rallies? As we said, a prayer in the back.

Do you not remember controversial, but also really good because I can remember it, 1990s ad with Georgina Byer, break on the straight before it's too late. Yeah,

and gun it into the corners. I don't think gun it into the corners. It was Jason Gunn. It was Jason Gunn and the road safety campaign. It was gunning it into the corners.

Right. Yeah. And then Thingy was like, no, Jason! Jason, slow down! Slow down! And Gunny's like, I've got this. I've got to get into the corners. Jason, no!

Too fast! And they roll all the way down. Do you think you would pass your driver's license if you retook the test today? 62% of people said yes, 100%. 38% said probably. I'm just imagining. Oh, wow.

A thingy in a car accident. He has eyeballs hanging out. Squirting blood out of his neck. And then it comes to a wholeness. And the horn's like, but he's like, Jason! Jason!

Jason's just upside down. Jason gunning it. I wish I never have gunned it. Don't say sorry to me. Say sorry to son of a Gun and Jace TV! Ah! Ah! See, that's a great road safety campaign.

You'd remember it. You'd remember it while you were driving. Jason! Jason, slow down! It's really tickled you, isn't it? They need to make... They need to start making traumatic ads. With beloved... With beloved children's...

Susie Cato. Just Susie. Singing, see you, see you later, as she goes off a clap. Yes! Because she gunned it. She Jason gunned it around the corner She just gunned it around the corner. She gunned it around the corner. Ah, Susie!

With the Wiggles just lying lifeless in a minivan. In the big red car. Oh, yeah. In the big red car. Oh, they've all turned into the Red Wiggle because they're covered in blood. Yeah. Jesus.

What's Anthony doing in the Red Wiggle? Wake up, Jeff! Yeah! Wake up! Slapping him. Don't be stupid, Jeff. And it Wake up! Slapping him. Don't be stupid, Jeff. And it always just cuts back to thingies. Jason!

Jason! Traumatic children of the former age. And then kids in the back seat every time Dad's like, we'll just bloody scoot through this orange. They'll be like, Dad, no! Dad, no! Because of thingy! Not that kids these days have any idea who thingy is.

All right. Alex says, yes, because I used to be a manager at NZTA who set the testing standards. Oh, okay. Well, Alex, that doesn't mean you're going to be good at it, does it? Cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater. Well, he knows all the answers. He's literally made the answers.

Alana says, the practical tester is the person that He's literally made the answers. Alana says, the practical test as the person that just taught my niece to drive. She passed and all driving skills came from me. So I think I'd pass based off that. But the theory test. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Ashley says, absolutely not. I was doing a learner license revision with a rangatahi I work with and I failed so many of the questions. It doesn't matter though. You've got your licence, eh? They passed. Oh, yeah, right.

Yeah, they were studying with. Anita. Anita, slow down. Jason! No! You break on the straight number on so late, Jason! Oh my God. I sometimes set myself a challenge to drive like I was in the driving test again,

says Anita. I reckon I'd smash it. Oh God, driving 48, 10 and 2. Yeah. Looking for the hazards. Yes to everything but the parallel park. I've only done it once and I haven't done it since my test. It's like watching Fletch try to parallel park a big SUV.

Oh, my God. It was a long car. It wasn't even a big car. It was long. It wasn't that long. It was just like a small family car. Also, I had the voice of Thingy in my head, so I was very stressed. I was like, no, Fletch!

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. ChatGPT, someone's just messaged in. They use ChatGPT to plan their weekly meal planning. And it also writes the shopping list for everything they're going to need for all the meals. Oh, that's amazing. You're just like, I love mince and chicken. Give me like five days worth of meals.

Could you say I want to have around 150 grams of protein a day? You totally could say I want the calories to be about this. And you must include a taco Tuesday. And it must be taco Tuesdays and on Fridays just I'll blow out. We used it for a three week

trip to LA and Hawaii. It created the entire itinerary. Opening time, suggestions of places to eat, Uber costs. A lot of people using it for travel. If everyone could just sit down. Because I've got the best use of it yet. Okay. Chat GPT is being used to help win arguments with your partner.

Oh, God. This feels toxic. This feels bad. So I'm at chatgpt.com. I said, can you help me win an argument with my partner? It said, sure, I can help with that. What's the argument about? What are the points you're trying to make?

So, Hayley. Okay. Let's help with that. What's the argument about? What are the points you're trying to make? So, Hayley. Okay. Let's argue. Okay, what are we arguing about? You could have done something wrong. You cheated? Or what about you've just... No, you can't argue the way that she's arguing.

You've screwed up. What about you keep leaving the toilet seat up? Okay, what about... Yes, no, you keep leaving... I'm just picking something random and totally not right for my life. You keep leaving empty toilet rolls. And I've told you that this is not a student flat.

Well, I keep leaving toilet rolls. That seems very specific for something. Just saying, in that moment, if this was a scenario that related to me, I would say this is not a student flat. Yeah, look at me about it and saying this isn't a student flat. See, but the argument's already lost its role because you're putting in the thing. Yeah, but what are you doing during this argument with your partner? Are you just on your laptop?

Go on. There's another role. There's another role on the top of the toilet. It's on text, right? It's on text. Okay, so this is a text argument. Because face-to-face it doesn't work. Look at me.

What are you typing? She is yelling at me. Who are you talking to? Who's she? I've got a name. Okay, what is she? That sounds stressful. If she's upset, it may help to stay calm and listen to her concerns first.

Wow. Please, what are your concerns? That this is a beautiful bathroom and you keep leaving, this is hypothetical, you keep leaving empty toilet rolls on top of the toilet like it's a student flat and not like you're a grown man in his 40s. I get it. This is frustrating for you and I'm sorry for leaving them out.

Let's find a way to keep things organised together. What do you mean, let's find a way? There's literally a rubbish bin. I'm not the one doing it. There's a rubbish bin right next to there. She is yelling again and saying there's a rubbish bin. I'm not yelling. This isn't me yelling.

If you want to see me yell, keep going with this. She's yelling again and saying she's not yelling. And that there's a rubbish bin for this exact purpose. It sounds like she's feeling really strongly about it. You could say something like, I understand this is important

to you and I'll do my best to be more mindful about it. It's not hard, Rowan. What do you mean do your best? It's not hard. You just pick it up when you're finished with it and put it in the bin. Again, this is just hypothetical. Just hypothetically if this was a thing that you did. But it seems to be aggravating her more.

That's tough. If it's making things worse, you might want to step back. These little words of encouragement from it. You might want to step back for a moment. You could say something like, I can see you're really upset. That's going to go down well. I don't want to escalate things.

Let's take a break and talk about this later. No, Vaughn, it's not that. Give us some space to cool down. Then you can approach the conversation with a clearer mind. What do you think? I think that's great. Excuse me.

But she won't let me leave. She is following me, yelling that it's an indicator of a bigger issue. Bigger issue and that I am not taking her seriously. Okay, what does ChampGTP say back to that? Well, that sounds challenging. In this case, try to reassure her that you do take her seriously. Okay, what does Chad GTP say back to that? Well, that sounds challenging. In this case, try to reassure her that you do take her seriously. You could say something like, I really want to understand your feelings about the toilet roll.

You're overcomplicating this. Can we take a moment to breathe? We! And then I promise we can talk this through. Okay, let's breathe. Has Chad GTP ever argued with a woman before? This would be the best. This is good stuff. Because you're coming across like the level-headed individual,

but all you're doing is racking them up. I feel like I would burst into flames if someone started talking to me like this. She just threw something at me and said, oh. It's going to tell you to leave the house. I just want you to put the empty toilet rolls in the bin.

Oh, okay. I'll give you something to breathe. She just threw something at me and said, I'll give you something to breathe. Wow, that's intense. Sounds like she's upset. If she's in this state,

it might be best to prioritize safety first. Try to calmly remove yourself from the situation if you can. Saying something like, I want to talk about this, but I need to step away for a moment to collect my thoughts. Okay. Do you know what? I'm just going to keep putting them in the bin myself.

Shall I ask her what's for dinner? Shall I ask her if she is menstruating? If you think it might lighten the mood, asking about dinner could be a good move. No! Just be mindful of her reaction since she might still be upset. You could frame it playfully like, what are we having for dinner?

I need some comfort food. Oh my God! This thing is not a human that has ever dealt with a human woman in its life. Do you know what? Don't worry about it, Form. She's screaming and... No, don't even worry about it. Okay, I'm going to say...

She says it's fine. She says... Tell it, it's fine. It's fine. Don't worry about it. But it's clearly not fine. But it's clearly not fine. But I feel it's not fine.

And she will worry about it. Okay, chat jeopardy said... Sounds like she might be trying to downplay her feelings. You can worry about it. Okay. Chat Jeopardy said, sounds like she might be trying to downplay her feelings. You can gently express that you don't think it's fine and that you care about resolving the issue. This is good. I've said, let's put it to bed. Now I'm reigniting the issue. This is good stuff.

I can tell this is bothering you and I want to make sure we talk about it when you're ready. So let me know. My God, I brought it up. Oh, my God. I was ready. Oh, this is great. I believe she's menstruating.

Should I change my approach? If you think her mood might be influenced, it could be helpful to be extra patient and understanding. Does it tell you how? You might want to approach her with more empathy and ask if there's anything she needs or if she wants to talk about it, how she's feeling. What I need and how I feel.

What I need is for you to put the empty toilet rolls in the bin. And how I feel. I feel that you need to put the swear word, toilet rolls in the swear word bin. And chat GPD. Oh, sounds like she's really frustrated. I feel so patronized. I hate this so much. You might say something like,

I hear you and I'm sorry for not doing that. I'll do my best to do it in the future. Not do my best. It's not a hard task. Just commit, make a commitment here and now, Vaughan, that you're going to put them in the bin. Well, it doesn't sound like chat GTP is there yet. No.

Does it? I feel so rocked up. I need to go outside and talk. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. It was the iconic gaggle Halloween party

this weekend. Our friend group. And I was unable to attend and I was devastated because I love getting dressed up in costume. You had your comedy show in Palmerston North. Yeah, so I couldn't be there. However, I was devastated because, you know, I love getting dressed up in costume. You had your comedy show in Palmerston North.

Yeah, so I couldn't be there. And however, I was approached by our friend, Dr. Shawnee, to help him with some costumes. And he said to me, he's like, am I correct in thinking that you've got a sewing machine and you know how to sew? And I was like, yes, I do. And he was like, oh, my God.

Can you help me sew these costumes? And he came over to my house on Friday night to get the sewing machine out. And by the way, my sewing machine is so busted. It's like if you look to the inside. What brand is it? Bonina. Bonina. So it's done some yards then.

Yeah, I got it for my 18th birthday. Oh, okay. So God, it must be like, how old is that now? Oh, 42. I dare you. On a day where I've woken up looking the best I've ever looked in my life. Yeah, you do. Stunning day.

Stunning day. How have you done that? I don't know. I just woke up like this. Stunning day. I don't know what happened. Lots of water, maybe. Hydrated.

Lots of water. Yeah. Yeah. I had another theory. Anyway, I... What, and you're not going to tell us? No, no, no. Anyway, that's a by the by.

Off air. Off air. Yeah, yeah. Okay, right. Oh, you know, I was in the hotel room all weekend. Hello. Hello. Anyway, flash, I've got to glow.

Anyway, so Dr. Shorty comes over with my busted sewing machine and he's brought these things. And I had to make these like sacks because they were going as an emoji. The little emoji pill. Yeah, so red and then fluoro yellow. Yeah. Yeah. And so I was like, he had no plan.

Yeah. There were six of them. No, four of them. Six meters of fabric, he had no plan. There were six of them. No, four of them. Six meters of fabric, 1.5 each, of the red and the yellow. And he had no plan, and I was like, here we go. I know what to do. And I made this plan.

It all came back to me. Home Economics, 2003, Queen Margaret College, when I learned how to sew. Wasn't Home Ec cooking? Home Ec was cooking and sewing. Oh, okay. Because I'm a homemaker as a woman. Okay, yeah.

Getting me ready to make the home for my husband. What else would she be doing? I don't know. Maths? Maths with a woman's brain? Are you kidding me? That's why I was confused why we even had things like maths. She doesn't need to write Shakespearean essays.

She needs to write a shopping list. Exactly. So that my husband can make his Shakespearean plays. Yeah. So, and I remember... Oh no! Theatre is for the homosexuals. A real man will be out

doing some manual labour to bring home money for you to take to the shops. Or being a lawyer. Yes. That's right. A professional. But the theatre is no place for a straight man. Well, I remembered all my home economics. I remembered how to make a bobbin, like how to put the thing in and make the bobbin.

And Dr. Shawnee was like, oh my god, I think he was a bit turned on. He was like, look at you go. And then I remembered how to thread the thing and da-da-da-da-da and get it all going. And I made beautiful seams. The problem lay when I started cracking the Proseccos. In moderation, I had one.

Just one glass. But that one glass really tipped me over the edge over the period of about six hours where I was sewing these sacks and we had elastic and the bobbin thing kept snapping and the tension on my sheen's all broken. But you know when you're like sewing something, well you don't know, but when you're like making something with

your hands and you get a really inflated idea of how well it's going. I was like, we should start an Etsy shop. Man, we could make all sorts. We could make costumes. We could make cushions. We should do this. We're like, this is great. I love when people enjoy something one afternoon and they're like,

I should make myself so tied to this. And I begin to hate it almost immediately. Also, having been to Look Sharp, I think they've got the costumes down pat. I don't think you're beating them. And they'll be making them a lot quicker than me trying to thread the bobbin on my broken machine. But yeah, it was very funny because then Aaron and Gerard,

his husband came home and my partner, and they came home. You said Aaron and Gerard, you made it sound like it's Aaron's husband, Gerard. Yeah, I did. Sean's husband, Gerard, came over to collect Sean. But the rule is when Sean and Gerard break up, I've got dibs on Gerard.

Yes, we talked about this. Because Gerard has an ass that don't quit. That don't quit. And you know I like my men with a big bononkidonk. With a big bononkidonk. And Aaron turned up and we were like so thrilled with our sacks that we all had tried them on. And then they looked amazing. And then I couldn't even go to the party and they were like so thrilled with our sacks that we all had tried them on. And then they looked amazing

and then I couldn't even go to the party and they were like, oh my God, you put in so much effort. Because when Sean showed up to mine because we got ready at mine, I was like, did Hayley make these?

He's like, yeah. I was like, oh my God, she should start an Etsy shop. Thank you. I've got my first buyer. I knew I was onto something. But it was a good party. A great party.

I went and picked him up on my way back from the airport to go collect his car because that one glass of Prosecco he had tipped him over the edge. Yeah, right. So obviously moderation was safe to not drive. Yeah.

But he said it was a good party. It must be nice being a doctor working three days a week and having enough money for an Uber ride from literally one side of the ballpark to the other. No, that's why his husband came and got him. And with a husband with a badonk that don't quit. I know. He's living the best life. There was a And when her husband was a badonk the dunk. I know.

He's living the best life. There was a little bit of controversy. The only controversy at the party, though, because we were very well behaved this year. I heard. Probably because you weren't there. And Maddie McLean wasn't there and meeting people in the face.

And Maddie McLean wasn't there either. Breaking people's faces. There was, you know, the host Mike and Matt, our friends, always put on a lovely spread. They do. So it's always bougie because do you remember last year

when I ate the cube of butter because I thought it was a cube of cheese? Oh, yes, that's right. And I was on keto and they catered for me with some keto snacks. Yeah, it was lovely. So this year,

the sausage rolls came out kind of mid-evening, fresh from the oven. Oh, my God. Deliciously, you know, sliced to perfection, like slim slices. Slim slices.

You know, with a lovely bowl of tomato sauce. There were bits of corn, carrot carrot and pea in the sausage roll. Have you ever seen a sausage roll? I'm sorry, what did you just say? It's not a shepherd's pie. No, yeah, so I've never seen a sausage roll with added vegetables. This isn't mum's meatloaf. I have seen sausage roll.

I have seen sausage roll with other bits in it. I like a bit of grated carrot sometimes in my sausage roll. So it was like luncheon. It was like luncheon, but sausage roll with other bits in it. I like a bit of grated carrot sometimes in my sausage roll. So it was like luncheon. It was like luncheon, but sausage roll. And when I said to Matt, I was like, what's this? He's like, they're bougie. He said they're from the bougie supermarket. It screams of mum trying to make meat go further.

It does, fill her. She's trying to bulk it out a bit. If we're talking posh sausage rolls, we're talking pork, apple and fennel. Oh, darling. Oh, darling. With sesame seeds on top. Oh, darling. Oh, darling. With sesame seeds on top. Oh, darling. Hand rolled.

Maybe some poppy seeds. See, either poppy seeds or sesame seeds. With a nice chutney. But corn, like bits of corn. How bizarre. At a party where people are drinking in moderation. Yeah. One glass each.

One doth not need vomiting. Peas, carrots, corn. Because they don't. Because you're always like, where did that bit of corn come from? We've all had to mash some corn down the shower drain with our feet. Yeah. The next day.

Stop, stop, stop. After a night in moderation. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. One Direction, excuse me, Liam Payne, died last week.

Tragic accident, 31 years old. Absolutely terrible. And then I think we were talking about this on Friday and we mentioned that One Direction died last week tragic accident 31 years old absolutely terrible and then I think we were talking about this on Friday and we mentioned that One Direction

as a group hadn't said anything yet because we were talking about all how celebrities were reacting and literally as soon as we left the building they did

I saw that yeah we thought about running back but we were on our way to get some eggs a joint statement a joint statement but then over the weekend, they all kind of let their own statements out

of devastation and sadness and everything. And then I just read now that Zayn Malik, who was about to go on tour, because he's got new music. Yeah. He's postponed it. Yeah, it wouldn't be right. It wouldn't feel right, would it?

It would just be a bit bloody. Yeah. The tone's off. But yeah, he made a lovely post. And so did his ex, who is his child's mum, Cheryl Cole. Yes. Cole. Cole, not Cheryl Crow.

Cheryl Cole from Girls Aloud. She made a statement saying that, you know, she was absolutely devastated and also asking for people to respect like the information that they share because there's still investigations going on and lots of wild conspiracies and totally and she was like, we've got a kid like I don't want my kid accessing this false information,

you know, so just if you don't know anything just shut your mouth basically and then I didn't realize but he's also got a girlfriend whose name is Kate Cassidy and she's made a post Finally saying you know That she's at a complete loss of what to do You know I love you unconditionally

And completely and then apparently his dad Has flown over to Where was he? Argentina Buenos Aires And he was visiting the site He like went to the hotel Up to the room and what not

Simon Cowell who obviously was the man behind putting One Direction all together made a statement saying you know how loved he was and you know sharing stories of when they first got together and what a fantastic guy he was as well so lots of tributes still coming in but there's like you know

in terms of the actual accident, there's so many awful things online. So just don't read them. Don't dive into that because it's pretty grim. Yeah, it's pretty grim and also, you know, it's an investigation and it's still ongoing. And so, yeah, very sad still,

isn't it? Rip the fingers at someone at the weekend. Feels good. Feels good, eh? Feels good. Yeah. But when you receive it, I hate it.

I like it. I'll do it straight back. If someone rips their fingers at me, I'll just rip it straight back with a smile on my face, which must be infuriating. Or I would just laugh because that winds them up even more. I wave like, hi. One of those real kitty waves.

Hello. Or what's worse, you rip the fingers and then you have to stop next to them at the lights? Well, that's what happened. Oh. Okay. This person, it was a merge like a zip situation. Oh, yeah.

It's pretty easy. You go, I go, you go, I go. It's really easy because you know what happens if two teeth of the zip try to go in before one of the other teeth from the other side? Your zip gets caught. It gets caught and then it's all out of line. So you merge it like a zip.

It's more for me that you're driving along trying to merge and a bit of the fabric from the jacket comes up. Ah, yes. It covers your car. Or foreskin. Yeah. Or even worse. I'm trying to merge like a zip and then this huge foreskin jumps in.

You have caught a member in a zip. I'm a quarter to eight. I feel I'm free to talk about my own penis situation. I don't have a foreskin. Is there still skin on the shaft? No, no, no. I got the... Tighter.

Okay. Got the top. It was a light grazing. You were the one that pulled it out. Don't talk about that thing I just asked you about. Don't talk about that thing that I just brought into the conversation. It was funny until you went into detail. Detail, yeah.

It really, really hurt. So we're merging like a zip. And I could see the specimen. I was just like, they want to get. Right. So they scream in. And then the minute they get in, they slam on their brakes. I'm like, what?

I don't get the push in thing. And then they're right up the ass of the car in front, trying to go around. And then. And you're probably right up the ass of someone else as well. Two stubborn drivers. Well, no, I couldn't be right. I was right up the arse

because they literally pulled right in front of me. And then, this person is obviously in such a great hurry, then they took the next turn off. It's like, relax, my dude. You're about to be off the stretch of road. So as I went past, when they were stopped in the median turning right

and I went past and they were looking at me, I just went... And they were like aggrieved they were like gasp you gasp my shocking driving

has led to somebody ripping the finger at me when you rip the finger do you do you got a little thumb a little thumb out you're only doing one finger you're not doing two

no that's nah nah not up you I use my thumb to hold down my index finger oh no I just curl the thumb. Yeah, I hold mine down as well.

Eminem pulls the fingers really well. The fingers only fall down to the first knuckle. Oh, you've got to hold down. That's a very aggressive one. Yeah, it is. Whereas I was just like... It says so much. Yeah, because I imagine when he was cutting off a chimney,

he was imagining a small woman. Yeah. Yeah, a small petite hairdresser. A small North Shore girl, a little bit lost in West Auckland. Early 20s. Yeah. Dad's bought her the car. Yeah.

Because it doesn't go too fast. Terrible ANCAP safety rating, but she's not going in. Terrible on a windy day. She won't be on the motorway anyway. Yeah. She just sticks to the shore. You know girls from the shore they very rarely

leave the shore we love the shore so he was really like oh bloody this Sheila's gonna let me in and then when he sees this hairy oaf yeah

this picture of masculinity yeah driving it and I'm just it's like are you laughing at me because it's my automobile yes

rip the fingers and it felt good. It does. I can't remember the last time I... Immediately, my frustration, I laughed afterwards. I was like, that felt good. I was like, yeah. I pull the fingers at my friends a lot.

I love pulling the fingers. It's a joke, yeah. It's friends when they say to do something. I think I pull the fingers at Fletch quite a lot. Yeah. He's like, oh, do this next. Can you do this? Take that.

Yeah. We want to know this when you last rip the fingers at somebody. Yeah, great. You want to take some calls.

Yeah. Yeah. It feels good. What about an iconic ripping? Because if it was like, if it may not have been your last time,

but maybe you've ripped the bird to someone. You still think about it. You still remember it. Like when you see a politician. Maybe you're on live. You pull the fingers at them. Maybe you're on live TV and they were going it. Like when you see a politician. Maybe you're on live. You pull the fingers at them.

Maybe you're on live TV and they were going through the camera and you got her fingers. Oh, you don't do that. Or that I, you know, the first time, and I never did, but I had a lot of friends that flipped the bird to their parents when they were teenagers. Really? Yeah, like that.

Behind their back? You lost that finger. There's no way you would have done that. To their face? Yeah, man. I had some naughty friends. My mother would have taken my finger. Yeah, same.

I would have been like pulling the fingers at my father and then all of a sudden, you know in ninja movies, you don't even see the ninja move and then the person's head gets chopped off. Yeah, you just hear a blade. And then no movement and then all of a sudden my finger would be like flopped down and the blood would squirt out.

And I'd be like, now I wouldn't have a middle finger if I'd ever pulled the fingers at my parents. Okay, well 0800-DARLS-IT-M. We want to take your, now I wouldn't have a middle finger if I'd ever pulled the fingers at my parents. Okay, well, 0800-DARLS-IT-M, we want to take your calls now. Text through 9696. Whether it was the first time to your parents, whether it was someone famous,

whether it was in traffic, when was the last time you ripped the fingers? Give us a call. What do you want to know when you ripped the fingers at somebody? If the person who messaged in, seriously, guys, stop waffling, whose phone number ends in 504 is still listening, that's me ripping the fingers at you. We professionally waffle.

Yeah. It's our job, isn't it? I don't know if you're talking. Caught the idea. A lot of people messaging in, some calls as well. Ange, you rip the fingers at somebody. Yeah, I won't be doing that again. I was on the Harbour Bridge

in Tauranga and was kind of stuck in traffic trying to get out of the way of someone who was like really aggressive behind me driving really fast. And so I saw the bird when they went past and then they continued to chase me. And then hit my car with a hammer.

Oh my god! So yeah, so I did the whole police report and everything. They couldn't and then hit my car with a hammer. Oh, my God! What? Wait, what? So, yeah, so I did the whole police report and everything. They couldn't track the guy down. But, yeah, so I won't do the fingers to anybody in the car again. Oh, my God. I would like to pull up alongside you. Maybe we can organise this.

Yeah. And you'll pull the fingers at me, and I'll pull them back. Take it. It's a business trip. I used to be chronic at doing it. My kids would laugh. I've had terrible road rage. But, yeah, now I kind of really used to be chronic at doing it. My kids would laugh. I've had terrible road rage. But, yeah, now I kind of really have to think about... Safety first.

Oh, my God. That is unhinged. People are unhinged down the road. Ange, thank you. Alex, when did you last rip the fingers at somebody? Hey, team. First of all, time listener First time caller Welcome

There we go We've got the bell Welcome Alex How am I? So I was on the motorway At Wellington About a year ago And some guy was

Can I say dick on the radio? Yeah you just did Why not? Up the arse And all that sort of thing And he He ripped half the end It was nice that you were Concerned about saying dick But then you went Straight up the arse My question's arse and all that sort of thing. And he ripped past me. See, it was nice that you were concerned about saying dick,

but then straight up up the arse, my questions asked. You're going to be somewhat considerate. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He even flipped me out the window as he went past. But what neither of us realised was there was a brand new Skoda undercover cop about three cars behind us. Skoda. Gotcha. Yes, I love that. So good.

So good. We drove the Skoda up to Kadrona. It was lovely around the corners, wasn't it? I don't know what you'd call you rally car up there. Kadrona. LL Lives. Alex, my God. We drove the Skoda up to Kadrona. It was lovely around the corners, wasn't it? I don't know what you call you rally car up to Kadrona. Alex, thank you. Some messages in. When I was younger, my little cousin from like five years old, I can remember doing that.

Whenever they'd leave our house, they'd all be waving and stuff. And then she would turn around out the back window and rip fingers. Little kids pulling their fingers is cute. It's so funny. Yeah, and we laughed so much. She did it every time she left our house. It became like a

still to this day. Keep your texts coming in 9696 0800 Dials at M the last time you ripped the fingers. We're talking about when you rip the fingers

at somebody. Feels good. I recommend doing it today for a light vent. Maybe pick your person because Ange before got followed and they hit a car

with a hammer. Even though they were That is so insane That's insane That's insane behaviour Some messages in I rip And then quite a few of these

Yep I rip the fingers At my kids Behind their back Because they're being assholes But I don't want them To copy me So wait till they turn around

And it's just a good little Frustration relief A little mini vent Yeah I love doing that When someone's back's turned So there's I flip it behind My mini vent. Yeah, I love doing that when someone's back's turned. So there's, I flip it behind my four-year-old's back, I flip it behind my toddler's back, I flip it behind my kid's back,

so they, you know, at least, you know, urine's good company. Lots of people are doing it. I'm a teacher. I seem to get a really persistent itch on the side of my nose in class, which my middle finger works best for relieving. Often after a child has

irked me somewhat. That's so funny when you learn as a teenager how to like sort of subtly pull the fingers at someone. Yeah. Heavily pregnant, emotions high, uncomfortable, grumpy, sitting in traffic on a little shit in the car in front of us. Thought he was really cool pulling the fingers at me, so I ripped him

both fingers back. Yeah, both's good. Stopped him pretty quickly. Hey Vaughn. Yeah. Just pulling the fingers at Vaughn. Pulled the finger at a car full of guys as they left the motorway but then they swerved back on and chased me for a few kilometres. Thought I was going to die from that. Oh my god.

Calm down everyone. That's not cool. Just take the fingers and go about your day. It's a nice vent. Yeah. What about somebody said, beats the fingers, sarcastic thumbs up. Yes. That's why I love a wave or a laugh.

Yeah. Because they're so upset that you're making it worse. Yeah, you're like, I'm not having a bad day. Just you, my friend. Hi. Yeah, maybe again here, I'm not having a bad day. Just you, my friend. Hi. Yeah, maybe, maybe again here, pick the pick who you,

my partner pulled the fingers at someone cutting them off. They got out of the car at the next light and punched him through his open window. I would just kick your windows up. Oh my God.

That is unhinged. Can you just calm down today? Yeah. Yeah. If someone pulls the fingers at you, I just think that you deserved it. Do you know what I mean? Laugh, yeah.

Have a laugh. Don't punch them. That's silly. That's taking it to the next level. Yeah. Give them the fingers instead. My eight-year-old daughter yesterday was giving me attitude and talking back. So I gave her the fingers.

And was that inappropriate? Sure. But man, it felt good. I calmed down. She didn't see it. She didn't get yelled at. That's a win-win. It is terrible

When you are secretly Pulling the fingers Behind someone's back Being like And they turn around And you're like No I look like such a loser Because that was

Yeah How it was Secret Getting out there Alright Hey Fletch Got ya Pulled the fingers at ya

Wow How'd that feel Hey both of you Punch her through The open window Suck it No don't punch me That big stone called Steve Austin energy

It is That's me Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley 18th of October at 12.15 is what Messenger tells me Oh yeah That was the time when I received this So Friday

Take yourself back to Friday just after lunch Beautiful I get a message Mr Smith tells me. Oh, yeah. That was the time when I received this. So Friday, take yourself back to Friday just after lunch. Beautiful. I get a message. Mr. Smith, hope you're all good. Okay. I think so. That's what I think

at this stage of it. We don't know. He hasn't had an MRI. Quick favor. Now that's where I'm just going to put a pin in quick favor. Okay.

I'm just going to put it. This comes from somebody I went to high school with that left after like, I think after the end of fourth form or year 10 and went to another school. Yeah. Right.

So when you were 14. Yeah. Our interactions at school were like we were in the big sort of group. Yeah. Not close friends, expanded group. Just when you're friends with kind of everybody in your year. Kind of acquaintances. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

School acquaintances. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. friends with kind of everybody in your year. Kind of acquaintances. School acquaintances. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. That's kind of it. Oh, actually we came last and second to last at an inter-school cross-country once but he was injured so that was and I just clarify, I came last.

I'm injured. Just fat. Just fat. Just fat. Fat and slow. Fat and slow, baby. Someone's gonna come last. That's how Just fat. Fat and slow. Fat and slow, baby. That's all right. That's how I go. Someone's going to come last. That's how we roll. Fat and slow.

You should have rolled. You would have gone a bit faster. It's the first loser, isn't it? Last. It doesn't make me feel any better. Thanks for trying. I appreciate that you put the effort in. Yeah, you're number one at losing.

You're number one loser. There you go. His mum was screaming, don't you dare stop running. Don't you dare stop running Don't you dare stop running And I said I'll never do this to my kids Now I do Keep running

All you gotta do Is move those legs Oh my god And they're not fat or slow Yeah But I am Still Consistent

Yep But fat and slow So wait you This guy left He left high school I haven't seen I don't believe I've seen him in person since.

Maybe like in that late stage of high school when you can drive and you go to like party, the same parties. Yeah, uni kind of time. No, not uni. Definitely haven't seen him through that. So you haven't seen him. So like 18 years old maybe. I strolled back in our conversation in 2015.

He messaged me on Facebook saying. That's 10 years ago next year. Yeah, that's 10 years very soon. About something I did on television that he quite liked. Okay. It was nice, nice. And then a couple of like minor chats since. But all up, what about five

messages? Yeah, so quick favour unpin, we're back in the conversation. Okay. Crazy. I've just bought a tool bag off Trade Me. But the seller's trying to charge me $52 to send it to Christchurch, which seems pretty steep. The bag's in West Auckland. Would you be able to pick it up for me

and hold on to it until I can figure out a better and cheaper way to get it down here? I'd appreciate it. Pick up a trade me picker. Cheers. For someone that you haven't seen in person since high school. How bizarre. And I saw it and I was just like, I've got to sit on that,

process that. That is so weird and we'll talk about it on Monday and then I'll probably pick it up for the content Because that's what you mean because on Friday I left work and went out to Eastish Auckland to pick up something, but for my mum

Even then I think that's too much to ask. No, but they were nice bowls, and so she didn't want them shipped. So she has to collect them in person. So they've got to live at my house for a year or so. Until Christmas or something. Yeah, something like that. But that's my mother. She birthed me.

We talk every day and have consistently throughout my 35 years. 100%. I'd say you owe her a few trade me pickups. I owe her a few? Yeah. I have done this to her. What a stranger. I've only done a trade me pickup for my uncle, Murray,

who's also my godfather. And he was reluctant to ask because he thought it would put me out. Even though it wasn't. It didn't put me out. An old high school mate. Yeah. Well, acquaintance. Acquaintance. Who I haven't seen.

What the heck? And so now you've got to have this tall thing. So I left it until this morning and I said, yo, sorry I never replied to this. I won't lie to you. This is a wild request. What did he say back to that? He said, yeah. And I said, and we're totally going to be talking about this on air. He said, yeah, I'm not 100% on geography.

You might be miles away from West Auckland. I said, look, West Auckland's a big place, but I do live out West Auckland. Yeah. He said, 52 bucks is madness. I agree, 52 bucks is madness. But no, not in this day and age for a whole tool bag. I've seen things recently.

It's heavy and it's big. That's what it costs. You don't buy something unless you factor in the shipping. You think ahead. The cost of what you're buying includes the shipping in your head. Yeah.

But it mustn't have been listed. And then once you go through with the sale, that's when they're like, okay, I've got it here sitting for you. That's why you asked the question on the Q&As, how much is this going to be to price change? Run us through a postage. Yeah, go and have a lot. Because $52 of the second-hand tool bag,

how much are tool bags? Must have got this very cheap. Yeah. It would drive me nuts paying less for something than what? The shipping was. The shipping was. Yeah. So wait, are you going to go get this? I think I will. Wait, if you saw this person in the street, if they were walking past you, would you even recognize them?

Yes, I'd recognize them, but I would have spotted them from ages away and be like, I don't want to talk to anybody. I do this to everybody. I'd probably, no offense, do this to you two if I wasn't in the mood. That's actually wild. That is insane. Have you done it? No, no, no.

Because we live in the same neighbourhood. We go to the same supermarket. I've seen you walking into the supermarket. I would stop and say, Hayley. Yeah, I'd say, Vaughan. No, because I think you were walking in and I was like out. I was in the car. I was just gathering my thoughts.

Wow. And then I saw you walking and I was like, ah, she's about to go shopping. See you tomorrow. My mum had a message for you, Fletch. She just texted in just one message, just that top line.

F off, Fletch. Why is your text so big? I zoomed in so that Fletch could see it from afar. Fletch has got hawk vision. I could have read that on normal font, by the way.

I just wasn't sure. I could have read that aerial 10. It would have slowed things down. No, I think it's fair that you pick up for Patsy. Yeah, I think so too. Absolutely, you pick up for Patsy. My parents don't buy things on Treadmill. down. No, I think it's fair that you pick up for Patsy. Yeah, I think so too. My parents don't buy things on Treadmill.

No. No, neither. What, are you shaming my mother for buying secondhand goods? Well, she's like you. She's always looking out for an antique bargain. She's got some beautiful antique Italian bowls. That's what I picked up for her. And they're all wrapped up and everything.

Does she have heaps of stuff? Or does she sell stuff on Trade Me as well? Yeah, she gets rid of it. So she's probably got like four or five styles. But she collects like really good. Yeah, she's got good style. But is it like, you know, you open up the front door and you're worried that things are going to topple on you?

No, no, no, no, no. She's got style. You're making for a bargain. Yeah, hoarders have style. The style is trash. They run out of space on their shelves and they put it on the floor and make a big pile. So yeah, I'm going to text him

saying send me through the address. How are you going to get What do you get out of this? Send me through the address. Are you charging him petrol? I don't care. Also, West Auckland is huge. It's a massive area.

But I like a dicky tour. I've got to get gas today. Maybe I'll get it tomorrow. Yeah, okay. But do you know... I'm going to say the balls of this dude to ask. It's hard to say no. Like the audacity.

And now I'm old. They're going to go, okay, well, my friend Vaughn's going to come pick it up. Here's his number. You're going to have to text the person and be like, hi, does one o'clock work for you? No, I don't work during the day. Can you leave it out on the patio undercover? It's going to be a leave out situation. Oh.

Mum says Vaughn can F off too. Why am I leaving? Oh, because she's got hoarder tendencies. You've both been told by Patsy to F off. Yeah. The best part is when they come to like move all the stuff and like clean out the house and go to a home, they find her nappy room and all that sort of stuff.

She's not going to look like what anybody expected. And the big like internet hit of your mom being a hoarder video is going to be like, you'll never guess who lived in this house. And then this glamorous lady comes out with killer pins. All those Les Mills classes. With all those Les Mills classes. Yeah, the Les Mills classes. They'll be like, not what I expected.

You always expect them to be slobby. Yeah, yeah. And impoverished looking. She's going to come to the door and they're going to be like, not what we expected to be honest. It's a classy lady with a bunch of shit. Play ZM's Fleshborn and Hayley. I don't want to keep harping on about it

and this is an audio medium and it's a shame for our listeners because I look incredible today. You're having a really hot day today. I woke up and I went into the bathroom and I turned on the light and I was like, what's happened here? If only they'd give you a TV show so everybody could see. If only they'd give me a TV show. I was radiant, my skin was glowing, and I put on a little bit of makeup.

I didn't need much. I looked great. And then I chucked on a willy-nilly outfit and it's fantastic. And I just don't know what to do. It's because you got hit on last week. It's because I got hit on last week. Now, if you weren't listening last week, one, shame on you. Catch up on the iHeartRadio app and listen to the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley podcast.

Yes. I've had a couple of text messages in this morning that we're not on the iHeartRadio app anymore. Yes, we are. From multiple people. Have we dropped off? I shall investigate. Please. Please investigate.

I just thought, that's going to really affect our KPIs. Well, we've got KPIs to get to. We've got KPIs to reach, don't we? We're ticking off KPIs left, right, centre. Well, if you weren't listening on the iHeartRadio app yet. This is a good looking app, isn't it? I hope we're back on? Honestly, it's sleek. It's sleek.

I don't think we were ever off it. Hold on, let me check. No, that's the PJ Harding's podcast. That's all right. We can get behind that. It's part of our greater network. Keep searching there, Vaughn. You know there's a search function.

I shall investigate. Please investigate. That's me investigating to see if we're on the iHeartRadio app. Now, there's a slight delay. We've got KPI's going to touch, don't we? We're going to turn off KPI's left-run centre. Wait, I want to hear. If you weren't listening on the iHeartRadio app.

I want to hear when we catch up. Should we say a sentence now and then just keep saying it until it comes alive? I don't think we were ever off it. You would need a timer. That's the keep saying it until it comes alive. You would need a timer. That's the end of PJ Harding's podcast. That's all right. We'll get behind that. We're about to loop it in ourselves.

Everybody prepare for the end of the world. This is a paradigm. You know there's a search function. I shall investigate. Please investigate. That's me investigating to see if we're on the iHeartRadio. We're in the loop now. We're in the loop now.

We're going to keep layering up here now. We are going to keep layering up. Which one's Vaughn? He's the one with the beanie? I don't think we were ever on that. It aligns. Okay, so we're still on the app.

We'll confirm that. I'm sorry, I'm a bit behind. Oh, see, now we're still on the app. We can confirm that. I see now we're on the double loop. So now we're laying a fourth layer on. This is an easy way to get KPIs. We've created an infinite loop of KPIs, like a perpetual motion machine of KPIs. We're in the loop now. See, that works.

That's lovely. That's nice. That's so chaotic. We are going to keep layering on. I think this must be horrible to listen to I think it would be a joy a true joy Mark that for radio awards We're going for 8 years on the trot and I think that is going to put the nail in the coffin

Who's going to add that one in there What was I talking about? If you weren't listening on the iHeart I think that is going to put the nail on the coffin. Always going to add that one in there. What was I talking about? Oh yeah, if you weren't listening on the iHeartRadio app last week, one, where were you?

Two, shame on you. Three, I got hit on by a very attractive fella at the beach and it made me feel good. There is a study,

this is out of Israel actually, that was a bit going on there. I'm surprised I got time to study. I'm surprised I got time to look into the habits of human behaviour in relationships. And they found that people witnessing their partner get hit on. So say we're at the club. Yep. Or at the beach.

At the beach. Yep. And say Aaron's there and he's witnessing this hot gentleman. Maybe he's gone to get you some ice cream. Hot brown boy. Maybe he's gone to get me an ice cream. Maybe he's gone to get me... Now we're talking. Tell us more about these. Maybe he's getting a little double scoop of

goody-goody gumdrops. Yes, double scoop of goody-goody gumdrops. No, I never do double of the same flavour. I always do one of one and then one of the other. Why am I having more? They've got to be complementary flavours. Cookies and cream and goody-goody gumdrops. No, that's not complementary. Are you kidding me? That's not complementary? That's polar opposites. Or orange choc chip and goody-goody gumdrops. That's complementary. No, that's not complementary. What's complementary to goody-goody gumdrops. No, that's not complimentary. Are you kidding me? That's not complimentary? Yeah, that's my go-to. That's polar opposites. Or Orange Choc Chip and Goody Goody Gumdrops. That's complimentary.

No, that's not complimentary. What's complimentary to Goody Goody Gumdrops? Orange Choc Chip and Mint Choc Chip, because they've got a chocolate chip. No, they're too similar. They've got a buy-in with the Choc Chip. And Minty Orange. Yuck.

Like a maple-y vibe. With the chocolate. No, with the rum and raisin. You're going too similar. Rum and raisin and maple walnut are very similar. They've got to be complementary. You could go goody-goody gumdrops, but then you've got to go something else. Nothing goes as good apart from vanilla.

Nothing goes as good as goody-goody gumdrops. Have you ever gone to a scoop place to get an ice cream and got vanilla? No. Because if you are, like, get a personality. That's pecan or maple. Do you know what I mean? How embarrassing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you want a nice subtle flavour, you're still not going for vanilla. No. Because if you are, like, get a personality. That's pecan on me. Do you know what I mean? How embarrassing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

If you want a nice subtle flavour, you're still not going for vanilla. No. Well, okay, let's say that Aaron has gone to get me and for some reason he's turned up with a double scoop of vanilla ice cream

because he doesn't know me at all at this point. And as he is approaching me, he sees that I'm being hit on by a beautiful man who would never have the audacity to get me a vanilla scoop because he's anything but vanilla. Rather than the thing that I would have thought, which was him being like, hell yeah, mama still got it. Look at her.

She's keeping it tight. All the men want her and she's mine. I'm lucky to have her. I'm lucky to have her. Other men want her. That makes me feel good because you want her, but she wants me. This study revealed the opposite, that actually it's bad for relationships because it makes them more insecure.

You see them as more desirable. You start getting into a panic. It goes back to your animal instincts, which a lot of these relationship behaviours do, of being like, that's mine. And then sometimes can place the blame on the Sheila. I'm just out here looking great. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is no doubt on a day like today when my face came out like this. Regardless of gender? Because in my mind it would be like if guys see their partner getting hit on but their partner's like ha, thanks but no

and come back to the guy and then he gets the peacock around a bit he's going to be like I like that but if a woman sees her partner get hit on by a woman

and he's like oh no thanks I've got a partner she's going to be like you did that you encouraged that. Yeah. Yeah, it is

but that's the thing that they can turn it on you and be like why are you talking to that person like that and you're like I'm just out here with a encouraged that. Yeah, it is, but that's the thing, they can turn it on you and be like, why are you talking to that person like that? And you're like, I'm just out here with a beautiful face. I can't help it. I can't help it if this isn't down. This is the great bikini attractor. A beard, or just a face in general.

The whole kit. You're looking at it, what do you think? I almost thought about texting you guys this morning and apologising for what you have to see today, because it's so distractingly beautiful. I know. People are saying there's a good vibe on you guys this morning and apologising for what you have to see today because it's so distractingly beautiful. I know. People are saying there's a good vibe on the show this morning. I think it's the sexual tension. It's because we all woke up hot.

Yeah. We all woke up so hot. We don't blame anybody for that, apart from ourselves. Get this show on the TV, I reckon. These faces are wasted. Play. ZM. Fletchvorn and Hayley.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. This week is Cars Week at Fact of the Day. Okay. Automobiles. Everybody's got a car or needs a car or has been in a car. I don't have a car. Yeah, he just relies on other people's cars. Yeah, he does. Yeah, automobiles. Everybody's got a car or needs a car or has been in a car. I don't have a car. Yeah, he just relies on other people's cars. Yeah, he does.

Yeah, fair call. It's not always how the world was. By the way, do you want to go to that new mall on Friday? Get lost. I'm not going to Manawa Bay with you because you don't want to go with me. You just want me to drop you to the airport when I go. No. Are you going away again this week?

She sees right through my plans. What's it like having no family? It's great. Honestly, it's phenomenal. What's it like not having a crippling mortgage debt? It's great. Yeah. It is.

It's fantastic. It's good fun. Up and go away for a weekend? Yeah. The whole weekend. What's it like not having endless responsibilities? Excellent. Wild.

It's a long weekend this weekend. It is a long weekend. Let's have that to enjoy too if you're struggling with Monday. Not Friday, Monday. Monday, yeah. Yeah. Well, I've been listening to Back To Me. Me, me, me, me, me.

My segment. Back To You, darling. Sorry. Me, me, me, me, me. My segment. I'm not going away this weekend. Me, me, me. Share your segment with your brother.

Me, me, me, me, me, me. My segment. I worked hard for this segment. Did you? Not really. No. I've been listening to a podcast. It's about a big fat book called The Power Broker and this guy that basically came in

and changed New York City. Oh, yeah. And this guy wanted wealthy people to be able to tootle around New York City in their cars. So he was just like, you don't own that land anymore, cars. But he called them parkways. He didn't call them motorways. Oh, yeah. Because that sounds nicer, right. But he called them parkways. He didn't call them motorways. Oh, yeah. Because that sounds nicer, right?

Yeah, parkways. Go for it in a luxurious, leisurely, toot-toot, chugger-chugger in your old school car. Yeah. And of course, then everybody just became reliant on it. Actually, a very interesting lesson to be learned. It's sort of around the world. The more lanes of road you build,

people will just drive more cars on them. You'll never be able to keep up with expansion. Interesting, I thought. It is. But this guy was kind of redesigning New York City to be a car city. And then they talked about how in the 40s, no new cars went on the road. And that's kind of what got me interested. I was like, I need to know exactly how many, there's just no new cars.

So here it is. In 1941, just before they entered World War II, the US made 3 million cars in one year, 1941. Okay. Then for the rest of World War II until the end of, like when it ended in 1945, from when they entered the war at the end of 1941 when Pearl Harbor was bombed,

how many cars do you think were built in the United States of America for the remainder of the war after the US entered it? Thinking that all of their resources had to be put into building planes and bombs and tanks and military vehicles. Ten. Yeah, I don't know. I wouldn't even know.

139 cars. Wow. That's a lot of cars. During the entire rest of the war. Because all the factories would have been turned into war making. They were all repurposed. Yeah. So did they start,

is that when the sort of idea of like a Turner's car auctions came up and we started buying other people's old cars? Secondhand cars. But no, but people didn't trade in their cars because they couldn't get new ones. Oh yeah.

The trade, the secondhand car market relies on the fact that there's a new car market. So everybody just kept driving what they had. Yeah. I'm guessing except for the very rich few that could afford these 139 cars. So to put it into perspective, the Ford Motor Company just went straight into manufacturing B-24 Liberator long-range bombers.

Oh, if you've got... I love me a World War II. Were those the ones that were in the... Those are B-27s. Oh, okay. He knows his planes, doesn't he? But the B-24 Liberator was like the precursor to that. And the average Ford car at the time,

and this Ford Motor Company that was making cars, had 15,000 parts. The B-24 Liberator had 1.5 million parts and one was being made every 63 minutes. Jeep! One of these planes was rolling off the... So you can see why cars came to a complete halt of being manufactured.

Because something with significantly more parts, a thousand times more parts, was being made one every 63 minutes. Now it's taking them forever to build planes. All the airlines are like, oh, still waiting for our planes, five years late. Yeah.

I mean, they could crank out one every 63 minutes as long as you were willing to give up cars and drive in and fly in one of the craziest, rattliest, cold, noisy... Yeah. I don't want to fly in a plane that was built in an hour either. Nah.

Take your time with the planes, I reckon. 63 minutes is not enough time to be in a plane that was built in an hour either. Nah. Take your time with the planes, I reckon. 63 minutes is not enough time to be building a plane from scratch. Yeah, but they gave you a parachute. Yeah, that's true. They did give you one of those. So today's fact of the day is from when the USA entered the World War II to when the World War II ended, only 139 cars were made during that entire period.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. The Bretons have come together online to share the ways that they like to brighten up their day. And maybe a day's not going so well. I actually like to tune into Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. You're a company woman. Yeah, I laugh out loud every morning with those three bloody...

Adorable rascals. Larricans, yeah, rascals. The little ways Not just you know Have a banana Buy an open stream of water To help combat Severe depression Little things like

Going for a drive Talking to their dog Cleaning and tidying Singing in the car Popping bubble wrap Oh that's nice Deweeding the garden I'm doing that today

Do you know what I find gardening very Therapeutic Yeah Zen moment of zen. Fingers in the dirt. A little worm. It's more like swimming. Yeah, it's so good.

Swimming's almost like sensory deprivation. Well yeah, because you're light and just gliding around. You can't hear anything. Popping bubble wrap is great. You know those big ones that you get the big plastic air bags? I love just squeezing one of those.

It's made of corn. It's got to be made of corn. Tapioca and corn. I don't know if it is. I think it's all displaced. Yeah, it's all just going to the same place. We're doing a big garage clean out at the moment and you know I've got so much bubble wrap from when we first moved. I've been giving

some away to people and da-da-da-da. I just threw a whole bunch out. But I was like, around the whole pile. Yeah, it's nice. Made my day. Well, maybe people have funny YouTube videos or TikToks that they save. News bloopers always get me. Instagram reels with a friend.

Washing your hair. Buying scented candles. Going, ah, after a sip of tea. The little ways that the people are brightening their days. I want to know yours. It's a Monday. Maybe people are starting this week feeling a little bit, ugh, because we're nearly at Christmas,

but there's still a bit, still a while to go. We are so close to Christmas. Yeah. It's a few months away, just over a few months. Yeah, yeah, it's not bad. We want to know. It's just over two months. Yeah, a few months.

What did I say? A few is three. Several would indicate four or more. A few is three. Several would indicate four or more. A few is three. Two is a couple. It's a couple. I should have said a couple a month away. You definitely should have.

I didn't actually realise. It's taken me nearly three years to realise how thick he is. Oh, really? Yeah, I didn't realise. I should have said something earlier. No, I went to like a low decile public school. You know, I know, but you had an ear of like, oh, I know things. It doesn't explain it. It does explain it. No, it doesn't explain it. Low decile schools teach the same things a low decile public school. You know, I know, but you have an ear of like, oh, I know things. It doesn't explain it.

It does explain it. No, it doesn't explain it. Low decile schools teach the same things as high decile. They just, you know, wear nice clothes. No, we don't need them. Sort of an information retention situation. Yeah. Yeah, okay.

It's super thick. Like, it's shocking to me. And we're only eight years away from 2025. That's the sort of stupid shit this guy says. That's the kind of stuff he says. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would say we're a couple of years away from, a few years away. It's literally next year. We're not a couple of years away from 2025. That's kind of stuff he says. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would say we're a couple of years away from... It's literally next year.

We're not a couple of years away from 2025. It's next year. That's next year. This guy. God, it's thicker and thicker as he keeps talking. We want to know the little ways that you brighten up your day. The little thing that you do. Maybe it's a really unique thing or maybe you just...

Your go-tos. For me, I love a drive. I love driving. Sometimes I loop around the block. Do you know I walked past a cat cafe yesterday? I was like, that would be a surefire way of cheering you up. Let me in. You would love that.

Let me in. Makes me out for a little bit and then makes me sad for the cats. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where do they go? What do you mean where do they go? They just like your pets. They love it. But do they just stay at the cafe all the time?

I think so. Or at the end do they clock out and go back to their families? Go back to their homes. Give us your pay. How much did you earn today? Earn your cash. Sorry I'm late boss. I don't give a god damn. Get in there and start meowing. And they're like Tiddles we can't pay you until you fill out the IRD form.

Oh god. What's my tax on? Because I've still got a student loan. Yeah. I think it's WSL or something like that. Yeah. Withholding tax.

No, but it's different for cats. WTSL. I'm a cat tractor. I'm a contractor. I pay. Yeah, yeah. It's good because I can claim back any costs of the business.

Well, you've got to choose your code and all that. You're claiming back your jelly meat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, no, no, no, no. Grooming? Oh, grooming you could claim back. Grooming, yeah, I could.

So I could claim back the five to ten minutes I spend licking my bum hole every day. I don't know if this is associated with costs. The Calvins are loving this chat. Yes, we love it. Okay, so 0800-DARLS-N-M, we want you to give us a call. You can text us 9696.

The little things that you do to make your day brighter. Yeah, the little go-tos for a cheer up. Yeah. What works. Maybe it's a sing song. Maybe it's a particular song. Maybe it's a little walkie-talkie. Maybe it's hanging out with your best mates in the morning.

Playing on walkie-talkies is fun. Laughing out louder. Yeah, walkie-talkies would cheer me up. Feeling down? These are the surefire things that'll pick you up. So many messages. These are really good. These are really good.

Jen, what is it that you do for a guarantee? Good morning. Good morning. Firstly, long-time listener, first-time caller. Lovely to have you here, Jen. No, what is it that you do for a guarantee? Good morning. Good morning. Firstly, long time listener, first time caller. Lovely to have you here, Jen. No, mine, mine, mine.

Lovely, Jen. So I got in the habit of having like candlelit showers. So, you know, like instead of having like a candlelit bath, you just light candles

and have a shower and it's so nice. Where do you put the candle though because it would get splashed? Well, you don't put it in the shower. You put it in the vanity. Oh, right. Okay. Well, you don't put it in the shower. You put it in the vanity. Oh, right.

Okay. Yeah, yeah. You're standing under the water being like, why is this not working? Holding my candle. I thought maybe you had like a high candle shelf or something. No, just like dotted around the bathroom, like on the windowsill.

Do you know what I love about this? Especially on a day where maybe I'm not feeling like great in my body, candlelight makes you look good. Well, and you don't actually need to even see in the shower. No, what are you doing in there? No, no, no. Yeah, nice. Oh, that's nice.

I love that. Actually, I'm going to do that tonight. Thank you for sharing. Kristen, what is your go-to pick-me-up? So I've recently gone into fragrances and selling amazing fragrances. And so I've bought a whole lot of designer sample fragrances and I put a new one on every day. And so there's nothing better than smelling fantastic every day.

Oh my God, I've been doing this, Kristen. I wear something different every day depending on how I'm feeling because I've got sort of three on the go. It's good, eh? Because I always thought you said you had one. Yeah, yeah, no, it's awesome. I love it, yeah. I can smell you through the phone.

What are you wearing today? What's that the phone. What are you wearing today? What's that, sorry? What are you wearing today? What's today's pick? Today is White Cell Libra. Oh, nice. Oh, because you're still wearing Britney. You're back to your Britney.

Britney Fantasy, yeah, yeah. Britney Fantasy. Yeah. Britney Fantasy. I'd switch between that or JLo Glow. Yeah. Yeah, those are my two classics. Their classics.

Their classics. Kristen, thank you. Some messages. Somebody said they write down everything on a piece of paper that pisses them off, and then at the end of the day, they put that paper through the shredder. Oh, that's nice. They own a home shredder. Maybe at work.

I can't afford a home shredder. Someone goes into the freezer at work and just screams the F word. Because freezers, if you could shut them up, they'd be pretty soundproof because of all the insulation. Yeah, they would. To keep them cold. they'd be pretty soundproof because of all the insulation. Yeah, they would. Tight. Tight seal. That would be a fun place to scream.

Keep your texts coming in. 9696 0800. Dials at M. Those go-to pick-me-ups if you're feeling a bit down. The ways you brighten your day. Honestly. You know what? Sometimes you're a little hot on the fader there.

We're talking about... No, donader there. We're talking about... No, don't say what we're talking about. No, we're talking... I stood up too quick and I had to have a quick little lie down. We're talking about your go-to pick-me-ups. Yuck. Yes. Oh, great.

Now, someone's texting a large cup of McCafe hot chocolate to start the day. Show sponsor. Show sponsor. KPI. KPI tech. Fantastic. We need a different sound sponsor. Show sponsor. KPI. KPI tech. Fantastic. We need a different sound for when we hit a KPI. Maybe we have like an old bell, you know, like stock markets have a bell.

Yeah, but this is a bell. No, but a big bell. A different bell. Like a ring-a-ling-a-ding. Like a shibunita. A ring-a-ding-a-ding. Ooga, ooga. Oh, yeah.

Like a cute little old horn. That could be it. That could be a goal. I'm going to look at how to buy one right now. Guys, there's so many CCTV footage of my sister falling over. Just replay that all the time. That's good. When I take the washing out of the dryer and it's still warm,

I just hold it for a few seconds to enjoy it. Get your face in it. You fluff your towels out of the dryer. You just never get the same with a line dryer. Yeah. A lot of people saying coffee. Some people say if they wake up and they feel rubbish, they'll chuck on bright clothing that day.

It kind of brightens their mood. Oh, okay. So I feel best in black, but it's, I guess, a similar thing. Yeah, I love the slimmingness of black clothing. I look tiny. Can you even see me when I turn on the side? Who said that? Who said that?

No, wait, turn back around. There she is. Oh, my God. You've got to stop doing that. I know, when I turn on the side? Who said that? No, wait, turn back around. There she is. Oh, my God. You've got to stop doing that. I know, when I turn on the side, I just go. Good Lord. You know what I mean? I just look incredible today.

I've got CCTV footage of my sister falling over. Yeah, I read that out, babes. You were on your phone. Was I? Yeah, you were looking up something else. That's okay. You were doing something on your phone, so I sort of took over. Why are you Googling Morocco?

Someone said when they, that's a hell of a spice. Yeah, okay. Morocco spice. Moroccan seasoning. Somebody else said here when they are feeling bad, they put on bright clothing and it brightens their day.

Yeah, so I see, my darling, welcome. I read that out. Okay. I decided to start, did you read the one about, I decided to start work 15 minutes late so I could take my dog for an extra walk?

No, I didn't. Now you're back. There's a lot of animal stuff in here. Somebody else said they just go for a walk with their dog and they talk to their dog and the dog loves them regardless of what they say. There's no judgment. Someone said I scroll Vaughn's wife's Instagram, flame flame.

Interesting. She is hot. No, it's because I'm on there. You've got your own Instagram More candid With more of you I don't put my real sexy shots On my own stuff

Yeah I just make her upload it Yeah Makes me feel better Marcel 30 year old dude Killed it My go to pick me up

Is to listen to Taylor Swift And try a new machine at the gym Or go for a PB Yeah nice Taking my dog for a walk is also a great one. Oh, you're the doggo. Because dogs love going for a walk. So they're like, yes, we're walking.

So that's a good vibe. And then they look at you like, you're the one responsible for me going for a walk. I love you. Yeah. And then they eat like a dead bit of something or some other animal shit. And then you look at them and you're like, yuck. And they're like, sorry. And then remember, I love you still. You're like're like, yuck! And they're like, sorry. And then, but remember,

I love you still. You're like, yeah, I know. I love you too, dog. Someone's texting something that I know a lot of people

will do. Just pop into Kmart. Oh yeah. That's not good. Shut up. You just get a couple little things. That's bad consumerism.

It's too much stuff. But it's such a dopamine hit in there. It's fun. Bad consumerism. It's too much consumerism. Shut up, you left-wing pig. You're woke.

You know our social justice warriors. Oh, God, shut up. They're telling people not to buy stuff they don't need. Get yourself a little treat from Kmart. Get yourself a $3 spherical ice cube tray. Oh, amazing. Yeah. How's that not brightening your day?

The ice cubes come out round. Like a round thing. Yeah. A full globe of ice. And everyone you serve it to will be like, how did you do that? Like, don't even worry about it, man. The only thing about the spherical ice is the tray thing comes in half. I want to squeeze it out the top like it's a cloaca and I'm birthing it.

No one said life would be easy, mate. You know what? You're right. I will open the tray halfway to get a perfectly spherical piece of ice. Thank you. Good. Hey, remember how you just gave that Uber driver five stars because you wanted five stars back?

Yes. Let's do that with this podcast. Oh, yeah. Review it five stars, tell your friends, and we'll do the same for you if you ever need a review for anything. But where are you giving me my five stars? Well, I don't know.

Do you own a restaurant or something? Yes. If you give us five stars on this podcast, tell us where you would like your review, and we'll review. We won't even go. We'll just review your thing. I don't want people to know where my restaurant is.

I'm doing one of those secret restaurants. Oh, I was going to say, because that's exactly the opposite of how restaurants work.