ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 22nd February 2024

Episode Date: February 21, 2024

Silly Little Poll!  Top 6: Better options at the Booze-O  Sexual Recession  Fletch & the Abseiler  Bet I Can Guess Your Mums Name  Are you in a Love Triangle?  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Good morning, welcome to the show, Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. I'm just doing some rash management. Rash management? Sorry, you've caught me in the middle of a rash management.

You're just hydroportizoning? It's spread. You've got to go to the doctor. This is ridiculous. It's spread to my? You've got to go to the doctor. This is ridiculous. It's spread to my eyeballs and my chin and my boobies. You must be allergic to something. Yeah, something's... Is it your cat?

No. I'm wondering if it's the fly spray. Oh, yeah, that can't be good. In the house? That can't be good. Because we've added a couple of those dispensers. You know those? Oh, right.

So you reckon it's like rashing you up? I don't know. Any new foods? I don't think so. I don't know what's happening. Oh, God. She's a rashy mess today. She's hot and burning.

Actually, coming up very soon, I need to give you an update on the fly situation. Because, you know, we've got so many flies in our house. It's been a summer for flies. It's been a summer for flies. You said you had like corpses. Fly corpse all over the floor. Yeah, one got stuck in my sleep shorts. Something worse has happened than that.

Oh God. How can it get any worse than having a fly in your undies? It just does. Picture it, just think. It just got worse. It does. Alright, the top six is coming up as well on the show. Yeah, there was a robbery of a booze store and they got away with 0% alcohol. Sober AF, that's the company.

Yeah, yeah. So it's like a whiskey or a vodka, but there's no alcohol in it. But you're assuming that the Ram Raiders are alcoholics or want to drink booze. Maybe they're straight edge. Maybe they're straight edge Ram Raiders. Could be straight edge. Can you get a straight edge Ram Raider? I don't know. It doesn't feel like they go hand in hand, but

who am I to say? No. Yeah. As long as there's no alcohol or drugs involved. Yeah. Maybe. By the way, we're getting a vape store under my building. Another vape store. How many vape stores do we need? One million. Dude, I know. I feel like there's one every 10 metres.

One million. The village where I live has five shops, one of which is a vape store. You're like, what? We drove past a vape store yesterday in August. My youngest daughter said, oh no. And then she saw someone she knew from school coming out of the vape store with their mum.

And they said, oh, her mum vapes. That's disappointing. The most condescending, judgy little voice from the back seat. She gets that from her parents? Yeah, yeah. That's disappointing.

That's an inherited trait, isn't it? It sure is. Love that. So the top six are dealing with this. Top six better things to steal at the booze store if you're not going to steal booze. Rather than booze-free booze. Rather than booze-free booze. Rather than booze-free booze.

Yeah, okay. Still a little poll as well coming up. We're going to test the nation, poll the nation on reduced to clear meats at the supermarket. Do you do it? Are you into it? Do you dare? Do you dare? I'll roll the dice.

Are you fast and loose? I will roll the dice. Yeah, I know you do. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Roll the dice. Yeah, I know you do. Now, Apple have come out and said if you drop your phone in water, a lot of us would assume maybe put it in rice. Straight to a bag of rice.

A bag of rice. They're saying don't do that. But it absorbs the moisture. So their thing is it could allow small particles of rice to damage your phone. Oh, shut up. But then it doesn't go into detail. About what else to do. Yeah. Oh, dum-dums.

Hot water cupboard. And bag couscous. We're a gas house. You ought to put it in a bag of couscous. Couscous. Well, that's the only thing couscous is good for. Yeah, well... So I don't know why they've said...

I don't know what phone's waterproof now anyway. I don't know, but... They say this. No, water... Resistant. Yeah, water resistant. Yes, you wouldn't just take it into the bath. But don't they say resistant to X amount of metres?

Yeah. You wouldn't take it diving, but you could take it in a pool. Oh, really? Because I... I mean, I don't know what their problem is. Because I had issues with my phone recently and I had to take my case off. And all the little holes are all full of dirt and dust anyway. What's a bit of rice dust going to do that's not already in there?

They've also said other well-known hacks such as using an external heat source to try and dry the phone. That feels like your hot water cupboard. Yeah, or like a hairdryer. Or a hairdryer maybe. I feel like it's going to be a good idea. Could you use the Dyson at the mall? Because that's cold air, isn't it? You know, the real fast blower?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can do that. Up and down, up and down. Also, sticking a cotton swab into the connector. These are all things that Apple are against. You don't want to do that. You don't want to do that. You don't want to do that. No, you want to get a pin in there. That's how you get little

fluff balls out. I don't know if I'd do that either. That's how you get little fluffy balls out there. Nah. I don't know. So what do you do? Just get a new one. That's what they want. That's what they want. That's what they want. That's why they haven't gone into details. They want your phone to go soggy, so you have to buy a new phone. Dumb dumbs. I'm guessing, yeah, I don't know. They want your phone to go soggy, so you have to buy a new phone.

Dumb dumbs. I'm guessing, yeah, I don't know. Where would the rice bits go in the connector? And then you plug your phone in and it gets mushy or something. But that's what I mean. Mine's already looking at it now, absolutely riddled with dust and dirt and grime and disgustingness. So what's a bit of rice? What's a bit of rice?

What's a bit of extra rice? I have definitely saved multiple phones with a bag of rice. Some people save up those little Jellica. Oh, yeah, they work. Yeah, little Jellica. And then chuck it in a Ziploc bag with that. Yeah, yeah, so you can save those up when they come in packages and stuff. What about a bit of damp red?

Yeah, that would probably work. Or a dehumidifier. Put it right next to the dehumidifier Is damp rid just Sashay silica Yeah I think so What is damp rid Isn't it weird

With damp rid We were just happy to have A tub of that sitting in the People might not know What damp rid was You'd buy a little like Container of it And you'd take the lid off

And leave it in like a damp cupboard And it would suck the moisture Out of the air and then the stuff would go hard and then you'd chuck that away. God knows, is that breaking down over time? Who knows? I don't know. Don't ask questions. Don't ask questions. It's a convenient, all-natural way to absorb excess moisture in the air

that can cause stale, musty odours. Because silica's natural, right? Yeah. Yeah. Or bentonite clay like kitty litter. That's another version of like a good absorber. Oh, yeah. Okay, well, Apple say don't do it, so I don't know. Don't share the messenger. I'm going to buy another one. Yeah.

Next on the show. Let's discuss Netflix's hottest new show. We've all dabbled. You've finished it. I've finished it. I haven't watched it. Nah. My wife finished it though. They were all at multiple stages, yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

So much to watch at the moment. I watched two episodes of Maps and two episodes of Love Island yesterday and that was me. But I'm stocked up with things to do. I still haven't finished Griselda. Oh, so good. I finished that yesterday. That's great. I still haven't finished Griselda. Oh, so good. I finished that yesterday.

That's great. I still haven't watched Curb, your enthusiasm, final season. Oh, I haven't watched that. So good. Saving it up. And I haven't finished, but I have started

and I'm very much enjoying One Day, which is based on a book. Yeah. Which then got made into a movie that didn't do so well and has now been made into a Netflix TV show. Yeah, the movie was, it's hard because the premise of the book and the TV show and the movie is that it highlights a day,

the same day. Over the course of 20 years. What day is it? 15th of July. And then so it was very hard for a movie to kind of show that. Yeah. Whereas a TV show is like the perfect episodic sort of set up. Each episode is a year-ish.

July 15th. Yeah. I think there's like 14 eps or something like that. Yeah, so I think it condenses a couple of years into some eps. Yeah. But basically it tells a story. It kind of reminds me of normal people. Remember, we all got obsessed with that.

Yeah. But less sexy, I would say. And it tells the story of Emma and Dexter who meet on their last day of university at Edinburgh Uni. And, yeah, their friendship over the 20 years. Will they, won't they? A lot of chemistry. Did you enjoy it, finishing it? I did, yeah.

Kim Kardashian posted about it. I saw that and she was like, it's a bit slow, but worth it. God forbid there should be some kind of character development and crafted storytelling over the redemption arc. Well, it had like within the first few days, 15.2 million views on Netflix.

It became the number one English show, number one watched English show. Yeah. It's huge. I was just reading up about the actress Ambika. Ambika. She was in This Is Gonna Hurt. This Is Gonna Hurt.

That was such a great show. Yeah, apparently she said no to the audition again and again and again. Really? Yeah, she said that she was such a fan of the book when she was 14 years old that she was like oh, I'm not going to play that character. I couldn't play that. Is the

book a bit of an older book? Yeah, it's that What's His Face Nichols. Nicholas Sparks. No, it's not What's-His-Face Nichols. Nicholas Sparks. No, it's not Nicholas Sparks. But he does write like every... Henry Nichols the cricketer. Yes, it's Henry Nichols. No, no.

I can't remember. David Nichols. David Nichols. It was first published in 2009. Yeah, and she was like, no, it'll be a waste of time. And rather than entertain the idea of getting this awesome part, she said, I'll just say no to avoid the disappointment

and then her agent kept pushing and then she got it and the movie came out in 2011 and had Anne Hathaway you're a huge fan Hayley

love very fan of her work women supporting women yeah oh she okay so she was on the movie yeah right

which apparently wasn't as good because it was rushed yeah it was rushed. Yeah, it was a bit rushed. Probably more Kim Kardashian's pace. Yeah, probably more for Kim. I feel like the casting in the Netflix show is better too. It's so good.

The chemistry is really good. The chemistry is illiterate. Definitely watch it. How do they age them? They don't really in the Netflix show. They don't really age. Because they're only aging from like 20 to 40 or 18 to 38, 40. And as I'm aging from 20 to 40.

You can hardly tell. Is there one episode where one of them works out that their metabolism's slowing down? He says in one scene, oh, look at me, I'm fat. And you're like, no, you're not. I'm a bit fatter. You're like, you're not. You's like I'm a bit fat and you're like you're not no you're not you've just cut the camera off

at your like chest yeah yeah yeah you're still not fat yeah but yeah I mean so there's a not in a way that we all sort of blew out in the 30s

you know yeah oh and the actress is of where she she's not gonna age like the rest of us is what I'm saying oh yeah yeah the beauty to her where she... She's not going to age like the rest of us, is what I'm saying. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think she's Indian. Where she's going to look. Yeah, she's going to look the same age until she's 60. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I knew she'd tick your box. Because you can't really tell where she's from. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was a...

Some sort of brown. Some delicious, delightful brown. Yeah, there you go. No, we'll definitely check it out because it's such a good show. I'm really loving it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Silly little pole. Silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly. That silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly little pole. Silly Little Polls

about reduced to clear meats today. Do you do it? I love the reduced to clear price stickers at the supermarket. I get so excited. I love a reduced to clear but I'm buying it to eat that night. Yes. Or would you freeze it? You could freeze it.

I don't love, I know this is I don't love freezing meats. Wow. I never, yeah, I know. She's anti-freezing meats. I get that. I get an ick about it, and then I defrost it, and especially chicken, I get ick about it, and I can't eat it. Okay.

You know how it kind of gets wetter? Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, I don't know. You've got to pat it. You've got to use a lot more handy towels to pat it. Oh, roll the dice. What's the worst that can happen?

You lose a KG. I know, but you've got bloody iron guts. I don't have an iron guts. Yeah, I know. Well, he's been working on it, though, hasn't he? Well, it's a little part. 62% of people say yay, yay. They will.

Yep. Buy reduced to clear meats. You've got to check their best before date. Like, you don't want it to be on the day, I reckon. If you're saying, no, I don't buy best before meats, but I do buy marinated and tenderised steaks, then yes, you are buying reduced to clear meats just disguised. Supermarkets are not marinating.

I mean, I could be wrong, but I assume they are marinating the meats that are near the end of the best before. 100%. Hide the grey undertone. Exactly. That's what they're marinating for. Yeah. But they're still not going to sell you something knowing that it's going to make you sick.

Oh God, no, no, no. Some feedback. Cameron said three words. Cozy, living, cry. Cozy, living, cry. Yeah. She's got it. I'd love to know what time they, like there's not a set time at my supermarket where they're like,

oh, okay, it's three o'clock, do the reduce to clear meats. It'd be good to figure out that way. It'd be good to know. Because you're there hot, ready to go. Yeah. Right here is the time to ask. If you work at a supermarket

or have worked at a supermarket, what qualifies something as reduced to clear? Message us at 9696. Okay, it'd be good to know. Yeah. Or you can call us on 0800 DIALZM. Oh, it's too early for people to be

calling. What do you say? I want to hear from the butchers that work for supermarkets. Oh yeah, they'll be up. When, when, what qualifies it as a reduced eclair? Is there a time? Is it a case-by-case basis? Well, they just look and they've got too many chicken breasts. Is it a sniff?

And they're all going in three days. So they're like, chuck the sticker on, reduced eclair, let's get these moving. You know when you see a huge thing of really soft avocados? We've got to get rid of them. That's why they'll sometimes be like a dollar thing of really soft avocados, we've got to get rid of them. That's why they'll sometimes be like a dollar. Totally. Rebecca said definitely by register clear, but it's a case-by-case basis.

You've got to give it a thorough examination. And it's the only time when you can get the, what is it, the organic or the free-range chicken for actually a decent price. I know, not like $20 for two chicken thighs. No, there's one of the free range ones that I'm always like, they're my go-to because they're not. Is it Bird and Barrow?

Bird and Barrow or something? It's a something and a something. Yeah. It's a someone and a something. Bronte says, freeze that mother effer. Yeah. So she's buying the reduced to clear and having a little something in the freezer. Good for you.

Laura said, I was all for reduced to clear until my partner got violent food poisoning from some reduced to clear chicken at the end of last year. Oh. Chicken's a whole other thing. No, but was it the reduced to clear meat or did he not cook it enough? There's that. When it's got that green undertone and you're like. Oh yeah, no, don't buy it if it's got the green undertone.

Yeah, when it's starting to look pale. Yeah, really pale. Unless it's marinated in some sort of basil-y situation, that would be the green. That's how they get you, they'd be the green. I freeze nearly all our meat for the week anyway, so there's no difference. Love a bargain.

Unless it's green around the edges. Yeah. We've all eaten a green chicken. If it's got a green tinge, don't put it in. Inge your mouth. Don't put it inge your mouth. I love it. Sunny says no, because that's disgusting.

That's an anti. For a dog, absolutely yes, but for human folk, no. For your dog? Reduced the clear for the dog. Oh, this is one of those people that cooks proper meals for their dogs. Oh, here we go. Jacob, former butcher here.

Okay. Go ahead. The meat comes with 21-day shelf life. Okay. It's cut and repackaged with four. As long as it doesn't smell, it's still good. If you're worried about dates, buy it reduced and freeze it. Yeah.

Okay. That's his advice. 21 days. It's cut and repackaged with four. Do you think it means with four days to go? Yeah. It'll get repackaged. So it arrives, so I reckon give it a day until it's butchered.

Four on the name. You've still got a good week on it. Does he mean they'll marinate it with four days to go? Yeah, that's what I think he means. Yeah, okay. Kind of into smaller bits. Okay. Another butcher.

Okay. I just love having butchers listening to the show. Yeah. I have a hugely admired craft in my books. Vicky says, I'm a butcher and it's normally fine. Only time I wouldn't buy it is if it had condensation on the packet. That means it's been in a warm area and then back.

Oh, yes. Like when you're in the toilet trays and you're like, I really don't need these chicken breasts, and you just leave them on the shelf. Yeah. I personally wouldn't do that. Or they've arrived, they've sat in the sun for 30, got sweaty, and then we've popped them straight to the fridge.

So they've gone up in temperature, then down in temperature. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, some text messages in. Okay. We ask people to text in. I had a good friend who worked in a butchery at a supermarket and used to slap a reduced eclair on a nice scotch

when I came in to do my groceries. Oh, that's a friend. That's actually theft. Company theft, but a good friend. We mark down. I work at a supermarket. We mark down between 10 and 12 in the morning and then again between 2 and 3. First mark down of the day before.

Two more. First mark down the day before. Okay. Two more mark downs the day of best before. Right. Okay. Oh, and so you're going 10 o'clock today, it's expiring. Reduce to clear.

Reduce to clear. Still not gone between two and three. Double markdown. Oh, yeah, okay. Wow. There you go. Would you get fish? No.

You wouldn't do reduce to clear fish? No, no, no. I used to, even getting fish from the supermarket, I'm like, I don't know about that. Unless it's crumbed and comes in finger form. That's it. Absolutely.

Load me up, daddy. I will eat all of that fish. Yesterday I shared earlier in the week that I've got a problem with flies in my house. Yeah. Just corpses everywhere, every day. They're just, it's awful.

I just want to have the doors open and enjoy the last of summer. Yeah, I'm whacking them. You're whacking? We're spraying? I'm whacking and then I splatter his guts on the window and then some Sade's like, clean it. So I clean it and then I have to wash my hands because I've got fly guts on the window. And then Sade's like, clean it. So I clean it. And then I have to wash my hands because I've got fly guts on them. You should get my cat over.

He hunts them down and eats them. Rolly used to. They do that thing. Chirping. Chirping, yeah. Anyway, so the other day I did mention that I was in my bed and I felt something fluffing about in my pants, in my little sleep pants against my butt, and it was a fly.

And I thought that could have been the end of how bad it got. But yesterday... Did you get the fly? This is what could be giving you your body rash. You got the fly machines. I've got the automatic, and we've got a handheld for the end of the day. Right.

I need Consumer New Zealand to do an investigation into which is the best of those fly... Because I always buy them. Have you Googled? No. I feel like the one I've got now is good. What brand? Not Eco Mist, not Mont.

It's not Mortine. Mortine. No, I had some Mortines and they'll last you a little while. Raid maybe, it could be Raid. The plastic ones are no dice because after a while the plastic bits all shit themselves. I know. And also I've had it going for a month and it's already like flashing red that I need to replace the thing.

Okay. Consumings that have done a fly spray. Hit us. Hit us. You've got to paint. You've got to paint, haven't you? Fly sprays or? Fly sprays.

Yeah, no, no, no. I want the best, most well-built machines. Automatic. Okay. Well, I can't see one for those. Yeah, anyway. So yesterday I got home and I feel on the cusp of receiving Aaron's cold that he's had. Oh, yeah.

Just a linger. Better today because I was like, I'm going to have a nap when I go home. Had a nap, set a timer for 40 minutes, woke up, hit that timer off, ended up sleeping for two hours. And after a two hour nap in the afternoon, I feel horrid. You know, like I

always wake up feeling awful. And I sort of woke up, I was like, oh my gosh. And I reached across and I grabbed this cup and I've got a cup next to my bed i was like i don't know i don't know no you did not i had water oh my god i had my eyes closed i went sip sip sip sip bloop and it was a fly and a fly had died in the car wait what did you do did you swallow or spit no i No, I like felt it go past my lips. If you've just joined the show, she drank a fly.

If you literally just turned in. If you literally, those are the first words of the show you've heard this morning. I drunk a fly. I felt it go past my lips. And I sort of like paused. And I had the water in my mouth with a fly and I was like, oh no. And so I just went like back into the cup and it was, it was a fly. I drank a fly.

Okay. You are a manky. I didn't mean to be. It was just this open cup and I was like, I just need to like. It was a glass of water. It was some of those nineties fly screens. Dude, I know your nose are ugly. I know those beautiful doors with glass. I know they're ugly, but goddamn, how good's a fly screen?

You can have the door open. The flies can't get in. Our house, guys, had weird magnets around all of the old aluminum screens. What the hell is this? And that must have been the whole house had those on every window at some stage must have had a screen on it

you were definitely turning into a boomer getting angry about flies I love it you're awful at the moment well I almost got my revenge by eating one of them somebody said

bug assault guns you know the guns that shoot the things that salt but Auckland's too humid the salt goes and it doesn't it just goes... And it doesn't... Congeals.

It just doesn't work. It doesn't last any amount of time. That's more of a South Island thing. Also, I'm talking like 30 corpses a day. I'm not sitting there. I don't have time to be shooting 30 little... I'll go around shooting. It's fun, though.

Nah. I prefer to drink them. Protein. To get rid of them. Yeah, protein. Play. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah... Play. ZDM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah.

Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the top six. Remember when everybody was just like, ram raids, ram raids, ram raids. Crime. We were loving crime for a bit, weren't we? And then it just stopped getting reported and people were like, problem solved.

Well, no. Ram raids are still happening. No. I'd like some updated numbers, but I believe ram raids are still crime du jour. Yeah. That's French for crime of the day. Is it? I am somewhat of a madame.

Linguist. Nope. Some somewhat of a... Madame. Linguist. Nope. Somewhat of a madame. I couldn't think of the French word for man. No, go on. Monsieur. Monsieur. That's it.

I'm somewhat of a monsieur. No, I think you're somewhat of a madame. Thieves have ramrated an alcohol-free liquor store. They ramrated New Zealand's only alcohol-free bottle shop, Curious AF. That's in Ponsonby. What a dumb, you dummies. You picked the wrong place. Well, I've had these drinks before.

They're definitely the best of the bunch. For the zeros, they do like margaritas and mojitos and whatnot. They're quite good. But zero booze. Can I add vodka to them? Not only can you, I have. So you buy an alcohol free margarita,

that's your work taken care of, then all you have to do is add booze. Yeah. Or if you're not drinking, perfect. Feels like you are, I guess. Yeah, totally.

You can join your friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Love that. They're definitely the best of the bunch. Okay. Well, I've got the top six better things in a booze store than 0% alcohol. Okay. Not to steal, just the top.

I walk past that counter and I'm like, what are you doing here? Yeah, yeah. Get out of here. Get to the supermarket. Scram. You belong in the supermarket aisle. Confusing to see a whiskey bottle in the supermarket, but such is life. Top six better things in a booze store than 0%

alcohol, number six on the list, chips. Yeah. Steal chips. There's always a big thing. We're not saying steal. We're just saying the things that are in a booze store that are better than 0% alcohol. Oh, I thought you were saying that would be better to steal. Well, yeah. I've just decided that we shouldn't be encouraging stealing, so I'm just saying

the things that are in a booze store that are better than 0% alcohol. Which has no place. So we're not stealing things that are in a booze store that are better than 0% alcohol, which has no place. So we're not stealing chips? Not stealing chips. Because alcohol stores always has expensive chips. We're buying chips. Okay.

Number five on the list of the top six. I'll put these chips back there. You put the chips back. You can buy them. No, I don't want to pay for them. Okay. I was going to steal them. You put them back. They're back.

Don't steal them. Number five on the list of the top six better things in a booze store than 0% alcohol, ice. Yeah. Oh, yeah. All these bags are ice. I always on the list of the top six better things in a booze store than 0% alcohol, ice. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Ice bags are ice. I always love a couple of bags of ice.

Yeah, I always have one on the go in the freezer. They are very trusting at my booze store. I said, I'll grab a couple of bags of ice on the way out. They're like, hey, freezer's around the corner. But I mean, I'm in there three times a week. What? You're a VIP there. They know me.

Yeah, they know you. I like to think I paid for their G-Wagon. Yeah, of course. They drive a very nice car. That's not a good thing that you're a VIP there and that they know you

by name. That's not the kind of store you want to be known. Born is perfect. That's what VIP stands for. Okay. Number four on the list of the top six better things

in a bird store than 0% alcohol, beef jerky. No. I always look at that. Too chilly. Bit of Jack Link's. Yeah, dude.

Jack Link's beef jerky rules. Okay, I like the teriyaki chicken one. It's not chicken. It's beef. Beef or whatever it is. Not every teriyaki is chicken. You can put teriyaki on other meat. You should try teriyaki salmon.

It'll blow your mind. What? No. My dude. No, I don't muck around with jerky Don't you? Oh you've got fragile teeth Is that why?

Yeah and it's just too much I love it It's too full noise The flavour It's a condense I prefer a jerky to a biltong And I do not apologise to our South African listeners Wow

Jared's quite upset with you He's upset. Now, Biltong's a chewy son of a bitch. Yeah. With a jerky, you can juice it up. Number three on the list of the top six better things in a booze still than 0% alcohol. Mixers. The original 0% alcohol.

Oh, yeah. Soda water. Yeah. Tonic. Can you just have a 2.25 of coke at an extravagant price because they've got you. Oh, yeah. You'll be paying for it. Like the chaps, they've gotvagant price because they've got you. Oh, yeah, you'll be paying for it. Like the chaps, they've got you.

Yeah, they've got you. Number two on the list of the top six better things in a booze than 0% alcohol. Life-size cut out of a Jim Beam girl. Yeah. Are we stealing her? Yeah. Yeah, we'll take her.

Yeah, they might want to get rid of her anyway. Put her next to the couch in the lounge. Yeah, leave it there. She's a bit dusty, though. She's been up on top of the bloody fridge for so long. She's very dusty. And number one on the list of the top six better things in a booze store than 0% alcohol,

those pills that kill a hangover. Well, so they say. Oh, yeah, so they say. Yeah. You lie to yourself and make yourself feel like you're going to feel better in the morning. Yeah. Good luck to you.

That is today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, over the weekend, Taylor Swift had her Melbourne shows. What, nearly 300,000 people? Yeah. Alvera and Carl Ween was there. Was one of them. Over the, what was it each night?

98? 96. 96,000 people. Now, Uber have come out and said that after the show's 15,000 Ubers, Uber rides. That's crazy. So maybe not at once. 15,000. And one in 10 were Kiwis.

It doesn't... Were overseas. Wow. It doesn't feel like 15,000 compared to, say, 100,000 people is a lot. But you've got to think about 15,000 cars all like swarming around the stadium. And also like the train and trams go from right outside the MCG, right? Yeah, and they put on

free trams for the concert. So a lot of us were getting the trams. And a lot of people would have been in the city or then getting onto trains. Yeah. So it's pretty insane. How long did it take to because were you on the ground? Were you on the floor? So we were in the lower bowl the first night and ground the second night. How long did it take to get out when there's 90 something thousand people in a stadium?

Funnily enough, getting out of the stadium itself, actually really quick. Like there were not that many crowds. It was just like simple to get out, whatever. But getting from the MCG into the centre of town where my hotel was was supposed to be a 28 minute walk it took us about an hour after the concert did you walk it rather than get in the car or tram or whatever

yeah so we Ubered there the first night because we were running a little late and then trammed the second night but walked home both other times

yeah you go to a concert it's always a going home sucks it sucks because you've got the buzz and then you're like, and then you're walking slow and everybody's just like dawdling and there's people everywhere.

And then there's surge charges or there's no taxis or the buses are full or the trains. And you've been standing for about five hours so your feet are sore. And you're really drunk. Or there's like drunk belligerent people around you. That's the worst. Yep. We had that when we were leaving,

slightly smaller scale, but leaving Mount Smart Stadium after Foo Fighters, my dad and I. And we were getting on the free buses back to town because that's like, you couldn't walk back. No. Onianga, yeah. And then we were in this line for the bus

and then all these drunk bastards started cutting in on the line and it bloody riled us up. It did. It riled us up. I'm sorry to hear you've had to go through that. I'm sorry to hear you've been riled. I'm sorry to hear you.

Do you know what I mean? Like, where's my private car? Yeah. You know, but I couldn't get the limo up where he was too busy. There's too many people walking down the street to get on this like,

bus with all these other people. Yeah. It was crazy. And then I was like, well, what about a chopper? Yeah. And they're like,

no, they put a ban on choppers. I was like, what do you mean there's a ban on choppers? That seems unnecessary, doesn't it? That ban?

I saw a chopper leaving and I was like, well, who's that? They're like, that's Foo Fighters. That's Dave Grohl. And I was like well why can't I get in there? Yeah.

Are you not listening to ZM in the mornings? Anyway. It's really tough. Are you not listening to ZM in the mornings crying? I didn't want to have to say it. Yeah, no, no. And you did explore other options before you asked them if they know who you were.

I did. I said all sorts. You did. You asked them. I said, can I just quickly get my car in here? Can I get a chopper in here? Yeah, you did. You explored all other options before dropping.

Yeah. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I'm the Hayley. They didn't believe me. So you had to take the bus, did you? The bus? I had to take the bus. This after the fifth season of Bake Off 2.

That's got to be a kick in the gut. I hate to say, on your marks, get set, bake. And they were like, why are you saying that? And I was like, listen, look me in the eye. On your marks, get set, bake. Wow, it was a real

crime you had to stand in that line, wasn't it? Yeah. Thank you for giving me this platform. Next on the show. We are in a recession. Apparently. Not only a financial one. A bedroom one. Play it.

ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. We are in the middle of a global sex recession. We are not doing it at all. Not doing it. We're not doing it. We're not doing it. We're not doing it no more. Is it because even going out on a date is so expensive?

Do you know it's different every country? So this is a massive sort of gathering of multiple studies from around the world. And it's looking right back in time in all of these countries. Now, the reason it's come to the limelight is that France is now having way less lovemaking times than ever before. And now that's the love country. They invented it. They invented sex. They invented all sorts of sexy things.

A lot of French from you today. Are you doing Duolingo French on the show? I should. No, I'm not. Bonjour. Bonjour. Bonjour. Bonjour.

Bonjour. So, according to this study, 99, no, not 90, 24% of adults aged 18 to 69 reported to having no sex in the past 12

months. That's French for 69. I was looking that up before you said the name. Oh, there you go. So a quarter of adults, nothing in the last year. And this is the recent one. Compared to 9%

in 2006. So that is a huge regression. So in 2006, 9% were not. Of adults were not having any sex within a 12-month period. And now it's 69. Now it's 24%. Now it's 24%.

Oh my God, no, it's not the majority, but a big chunk of people. I mean, that's one in four. That's a lot. At its lowest level, the frequency of intercourse is its lowest level in 50 years and that is worldwide. So it's mirroring all sorts of western countries. England is

the same. Japan is in the middle of a sex recession. Almost 68% of marriages in Japan are almost completely sexless. Oh, my God. We can't blame Gen Z, can we?

Because you said up to 69. The age is up to 69. Yeah, it's just like anyone who's sexually active and not elderly is who's been asked. South Korea, one in three adults have not had sexual intercourse for over a year. A third? I just think just say sex.

I just think just say sex. Any word? Sexual intercourse? It's weird. Right, you don't like intercourse. Any stats there on dry humping? No dry humping specific stats. Well, maybe that could lead to.

I think we need to get back to the basics. You know, people keep it simple, stupid, and there is no simply nothing sexier or simpler than a good try-up. Okay, I don't know about that. I got told off yesterday by Sade for talking about this. Did you? About dry humping. Yeah. Somebody, we've got a rat.

You know, when I... Who's the rat? What do you mean? Not in this order. In the listener slash the radio slash podcast, we've got a rat. I didn't rat. And they're ratting on me every time I talk about it. Somebody messaged Sade. Yeah.

What did they say? They said, give the old boy what he wants or something. What is this? And she's like, what is this referring to? And they said, well, apparently you just want to get straight down to business rather than enjoy a classic dry hump. Oh, my God. And she was like, you can't be telling people that.

Rats, you need to stay out of it. Stop ratting on me. I've got some New Zealand stats. Okay. Because on average, this is as of last year, people between the ages of 30 and 39 are having sex 1.6 times a week. Now, is that 0.6?

Is that the dry hump? It could be because it's not a full one. We're doing it full once and having a dry hump or some hand stuff. 0.6. I mean, the 0.6, that's how averages work. No, no, no. It's saying that we're having sex 1. or some hand stuff. A.6. A.6. That's how averages work. No, no, no. It's saying that we're having sex

1.6 times a week. Yeah. Is.6 south? That's really good, doesn't it? South life. Yeah, that's really good. 1.5 times a week. So 40 to 49 year olds.

So that's like two times every three weeks. Yeah. 40 to 49 year olds are having half the amount of sex of their 20-something counterparts who are getting it on 69 times a year. Nice.

Nice. Anyway, we're having some... Who did this? Who did this study? It's collated. There's a heap of them. There's collated like hundreds of studies. Oh, wow.

Together, so... Universities mostly. Mm. Why does that make you laugh? Somebody said, I think this could be directly related to how easy it is to get unstuck from a washing machine these days. Washing machines

used to trap you a lot longer. That's probably a good point though. Online content has definitely... One of the states out of America when they were citing the reason, you know, asking people like, why do you think you're having less sex?

Phones. Phones, yeah. Oh, yeah, phones in bed. Get in bed, straight on the phone, kills the mood, turn the light off, go to sleep. Phones. Well, I still haven't had my birthday missionary.

Haven't you? What are we now, the 22nd? Good God. It is a weekday. Your birthday wasn't a weekday so maybe just wait till the weekend. We're going to have

some drinks tomorrow night. Maybe that'll loosen things up. Oh, I have a Weber Shard. Yeah, if you could get in her ear about that. Don't get her. Don't make her think. I think maybe

if the listeners message her maybe you're going to ask. Is that what you want? There's a Goldilocks zone where, you know, she'll be down for it but then she's going to want to Is that what you want? There's a Goldilocks zone where, you know, she'll be down for it, but then she's going to want to get freaky and do positions other than the best one. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

So let's not go too far. Play ZM's Fletch Von Anele. Play ZM. Yesterday, I walked past a guy, and I looked up, and he was holding a squeegee bottle, a little mini. Oh, yeah, cute. And he was standing next to a car and I was like, weird. And then I looked at the car and there were big paint splotches all over it. Oh, no.

And he was like trying to remove them. And he was like an abseiler. You know those building abseilers? Oh, my God. And so he must have been up painting the building. And there were paint splotches. So someone had just parked their car and it's paint splotches. And I was like, oh, my God.

What kind of paint is that? Like building paint. Like painting the side of a building. I know, but I was saying, is it water-based? Is it oil-based? I don't know. I couldn't even look. I was like, oh, my dude.

Oh, my God, my dude. I was like, this is something I would do. I couldn't even trust myself to, like, lower myself down an abseil. So do you think he was the abseiler, not the owner of the car? He was the abseiler. He was the abseiler because he was wearing a uniform. How big were the splotches? Yeah, because they've fallen from a great height.

Quite big. Quite big. I saw something on Instagram yesterday that was a man saying, like, someone had a great height. Quite big. Quite big. I saw something on Instagram yesterday that was a man saying like, someone had a lucky day and it was a car parked under a building that was being constructed on and it had a huge like bolt had fallen and because it had fallen from such a great height,

it had like dented the bonnet of this car. But if it had hit someone on the head. Was that the scaffolding clip? Yeah. Because I saw that. Did you see that? It cut through the bonnet of the car. But if it had hit someone in the head. Was that the scaffolding clip? Yeah. Because I saw that. Did you see that? It cut through the bonnet of the car. Yeah.

It went through it and fell from, and just must have hit at the right angle and blew a hole in the car. And they were like, I mean, the car will get insurance. It's fine. But that wasn't in New Zealand. If that hit a person. No. I think it would be in the news.

Because they always make, they always have those like old shipping containers. Yeah. And you have to walk under them when you go past building construction So if something like that happens But paint I know, I was just like, oh, that is something I would do I was like, I feel so sorry for you But I don't know if he was like, in my mind, he was like, quick

Clean this up before they get back Because that's something I would do But do you think he would have known, like he would have been painting up there and then knowing that some went blub blub blub blub. Or maybe he like dropped his paint brush or maybe, I don't know, dropped the bucket. Because they have a little bucket in their pouch, a little paint

tray. Yeah. Oh, I couldn't do it. Oh, no, neither. I always like tip my hat to those like when they're cleaning or they're painting. I know, we get them on our building. How do you even get into that? I know, I don cleaning or they're painting. I know, we get them on our building. What, how do you even get into that? I know,

I don't want to do it. I reckon you start at the traffic lights. What? Doing windscreens. Oh, yeah, yeah,

yeah, cleaning. No, you start at camp. No, you start at your school camp and then you go to do a ropes course

and you're like, I kind of like this. Oh, no, you're starting on the rope side. I was starting with the window cleaning side. Yeah, that's what I'm asking. If you become an abseiling window cleaner

or painter. Are you an abseiler first or are you a window cleaner first? Or a cleaner first. Are you a painter first or a tradie first? Yeah, exactly. Because a lot of them

are on ropes fixing things and actually, maybe your time at the circus is done. And you've always wanted to be a builder. After the tragic loss of the Flying Graysons, you could no longer return to the circus. So you had to put your rope skills to another. Yeah.

You were against getting rid of the animals. You were like, why are people going to come? What's the point? I'm not doing the trapeze unless there's a lion and a cage. No, we can't do it anymore. People are complaining. I'm leaving and joining the world of abseiling cleaners and painters.

Wow. Well, if you were in Auckland yesterday and your car got bloody, you know. Yeah. Paint on it. You're saying you reckon he was trying to get it done before the person got back to the car? Oh, 100.

I would do that. Yeah. Because if it was water-based paint and he was wiping it off and he was doing it quick, you know, it'd be fine. You'd be able to get it off. It was a white car, though. White paint? No, like a creamy brown.

Oh, creamy brown. Like noticeable. I wouldn't have gone creamy brown. For my building. For my building, I wouldn't go creamy brown. No, I wouldn't go creamy brown. No, you'd go your blacks, your greys. Yeah.

Your green, maybe I'll go green, but not creamy brown. There is a woman, her name is Melissa Sloan. She lives in the UK and she's received the title of Britain's most tattooed mum. She has, if you kind of, because when you get to a point where you see heavily tattooed people, they're also joining. Yeah. Did you see Machine Gun Kelly? Yes. No.

Oh, his head's blacked out. Yeah, so from here to here, like his chest and his whole arms. When you say here to here, I can see you, but no one listening can. Is this not TV? No. Why did I go to all this effort this morning? I'm sorry, the neck to the above belly button and his whole arms is blackout tattooed now. You know how people do it, they colour it in?

He's kind of got some like... Peeping through lines. How long would that take? Oh, forever. How much would that be? I've seen people with the blackout arms and they do look quite cool because then you can get like white tattoos on top and whatnot.

But oh man, it'll take hours and it'll hurt. I saw this Instagram account called Macro something and it zooms right in on everyday things. And have you seen the tattoo gun going into like the skin like jelly and dropping the ink?

I was like, it's a no from me, dog. Yeah. But 800 tattoos. She's got 800 tattoos. I'm showing Vaughn. Her. No, Machine Gun Kelly. Are you kidding me?

Yeah. No, that's that. Yeah, for sure. Are we sure that's not just vivid? I mean, it could be vivid. It looks so vivid, my dudes. He could have got bored in science. Yeah.

And given himself tattoos. We're in the 90s, and I'm guessing it was 2000s for you. A lot of drawing on ourselves with vivids. Constantly. Looking back, maybe not the best idea. It's in there, eh? Anyway, so she's got 800 tattoos. She claims she can only go like four to five days

without feeling like she needs to get a new one. It's a bit of an addiction for her. And she's like, you know, like they love it. And they did this thing where they're like, let's cover them all up within Lizzie. And then her kids were like, oh, yuck. You look awful without them. Anyway, we want to try

to find... It must have cost her a fortune. Oh, people spend thousands. And how many hours for 800 tattoos? Well, she's had 800 tattoos, but only got her first one done 10 years ago at the age of 36. She's 46 now.

Oh, wow. So she wasn't someone who started getting them as a teenager or whatever. She, at 36, was like, you know what? I'm going to get these tattoos. Anyway, we're going to try to find New Zealand's most tattooed person.

If you think that you could add up all of your tattoos or maybe give us a body percentage, like a coverage percentage. For example, if you have a bunch of grapes tattooed onto you, that's one tattoo or is it each grape is a tattoo? No, no, no, that's one tattoo. One big tattoo. What if you got the grapes at different times?

Yeah. It's still one tattoo, isn't it? I question why you're making your grape bunch bigger and bigger each year. Well, because I love grapes. I love grapes. What do the grapes represent? My love of wine. Oh, so every time you finish a

case of wine, you get another grape. They call him the grape man. And they're different grapes. It represents the grape that the wine was made of. That's a chignon, that's a semillon. Yeah, beautiful. That's nice. Well, however's a Semillon. Yeah, yeah, beautiful. Yeah, beautiful. That's nice.

Well, however you want to, if you think that you are the most tattooed of our listeners. I would love to hear from people that just have a bunch, a load of tattoos. I'd love to know how much you've spent on them. I've got one, two, three, four. Four, I think. Okay, let's go around the room,

because Vaughan and I, we don't have a single. And we'll probably never, right? I don't think so. No, neither. I've got four. I do want to never, right? I don't think so. No, neither. I've got four. I do want to get my Do Not Resuscitate. Yeah, yeah, beautiful. So romantic.

But I might just get a T-shirt. I might get eight T-shirts made. Do Not Resuscitate. So that you're always wearing it. I'm always wearing my Do Not Resuscitate shirts. What age are you going to start wearing those? Because it's pretty too young to. Next week.

As soon as I can get them back from the printer. It's really, it just does not want to be resuscitated. Yeah, I've got four. Shannon, you've got none. Carwin's got a bunch. How many have you got, Carwin? I've got seven. Seven.

Jared, you've got? Five. Five. Do you feel the addiction now that you've got like seven or five? You're just itching for that next one? Yeah, I got one on Sunday and I already want a new one. Yeah, I've got a few in the works. But are you worried that when you're 80 and a Ryman and your skin's,

you know how old people's skin goes all blah, blah, blah? Who cares? Yeah, I'll look like the hottest girl in the Ryman. Wait, so none of yours join, eh? They're all like. Nah, sticker style. Sticker style, right. Yeah, gotcha.

Do you think you will join them? Nah. Nah, okay, keep them all separate. Okay. Well. Aaron's got a couple of whoppers. He's got his whole bottom leg done, and he's got a little tramp stamp.

You remember this? He's got a little, remember when he was like 19, he got a sort of a design on his lower back. And that didn't put you off when you met him? Nah. It's good. Oh, but he's you met him? Nah. It's good. Oh, buddy, someone to look at now.

It's a target. Someone to look at. I don't know what I'm doing back there. I don't know. Okay, 0800DARLSATM. We want to take your calls now. You can text her as well, 9696. Do you think that you might be our most tattooed listener?

Tell us about your tattoos. Yeah, I mean, you've only got to beat four or seven at the moment. Well, a woman in Britain has 800 tattoos, claiming the title of most tattooed British mother. And we want to know, 800. She's basically covered head to toe. Okay, well, let's start. Becky, how many do you have?

I have 14. 14, that's a good starting number. What's your best one? What's 14. 14? That's a good starting number. What's your best one? What's your fave? Probably my sleeve. It's like where I've got the most. It's done it up patchwork. Oh.

But, yeah. What have we got? Like what style? What's on there? Tell us one of them. A bunch of mushrooms. Okay, so mushrooms. What kind of mushrooms. Okay. Mushrooms. What kind of mushrooms? Button mushroom, portobello. Shiftake.

Porcini. Magic. Fly agaric. Huh? Fly agaric. Fly agaric? Yeah. Or fly a mantia.

I'm just not familiar with that. I don't know. I don't know. Is it... The pointed one. Right. So do you think... The white dots.

Oh, right. The red ones are the white dots. Do you right, the red ones with the white dots. Do you think that you're fully addicted now and this will never stop? Oh, absolutely. I'm already planning, like, the next five, ten tattoos. Okay. Chuck a flick Gordon Haley in there. At 15. Shaylee, how many do you have?

Approximately 45. Holy, okay. I don't think it's you have? Approximately 45. Holy, okay. I don't know if I get the 800 mark. No. 45. What's your biggest one? The biggest one is my neck fully covered. Oh, your neck.

I heard that hurts. Did that hurt? It actually didn't. It was the least painful tattoo I've had. What was your most painful? I would say my ribs. Oh my god, I've had my ribs done. It's awful, eh? And never again, never again.

So where are they all? Because that's a lot, 45, that's a lot. They're literally in every place that you could see. So like, if I make sure I wear shorts, you can see all the tattoos from my shorts down. My arms, one arm's covered, one arm's got pretty much

what you could stick a tattoo. Yeah. I guess. Fingers, hands. I have a spate tattoo because that's my last name. Stake. Stake.

S-P for Peter, like the bear. Oh, spate. Oh, I thought you meant a nice steak. I was like, I'll get a steak. Warren was hoping his mind to a steak.

Maybe Warren could finally get a tattoo of a steak. Shaylee, thank you. Some messages in. I dropped $16,000 last year. Full legs, covered both arms, started my back, and the tops of my feet are done. 15-day sessions. I imagine tops of your feet would hurt so much.

Oh, my God. That's so much money. My mum tried reverse psychology when I was 17 and gave me permission and took me for a tiny tattoo thinking I'd hate the pain. Backfired. Over 10 years later, constantly adding each year. 76% of my body is covered with tattoos.

I've been adding my favourite foods to my body since I was in school. Every six months I tattoo my favourite food of my body since I was in school. Every six months, I tattoo my favourite food of the moment. Like what kind of food? Well, I had an obsession in my early 20s with cucumbers, so I've got over 10 tats

of different sorts of cucumbers alongside ramen and Eggs Benedict. With a side of bacon? With bacon. Or salmon? No, salmon doesn't... Doesn't that make it a different... Eggs?

Florentine. Yeah,, eggs? Florentine. Yeah, that's eggs Florentine. Oh, my apologies. Which one's the spinach? Is that Florentine? Is that Florentine? Oh, I don't know. You'd have to get a bachelor's handbag.

A rotisserie chub. A pre, a supermarket rotisserie chub. A little colostar and tray of mints. I wonder what like a little mouly of butter chicken looks like. Keep your texts coming in, 96, 96, 96, you can call us, 0800, dial to them. I want what a little moolie of butter chicken looks like Keep your texts coming in 96

Orange blob 9696 You can call us 0800 Dials it in Tell us about how many tattoos you've got The more the merrier I don't think we're going to beat 800 No

We are talking about how many bloody tattoos you've got A.K.A. how disappointed your parents are A UK mum has 800 We're not going to beat that No we're not You know what we should have done is percentage of body tattooed. Because, you know, you could have a full sleeve and that's one, right? If you got it done in one session.

Yeah, if it was like one big thing. Yeah. Yeah, I know. Yeah, just how covered up are you, basically? Because 800, that's pretty much, man, tattoo artists must see. Because when you run out of the real estate that people can see, you've got to start going for, you know. I have friends with, yeah, tattooed bits and. Because when you run out of the real estate that people can see, you've got to start going for the, you know. I have friends with, yeah, tattooed bits and bobs.

Really? Yeah. A pain or? A mound. A friend who has a mound. What a description. What a description. What could they have tattooed there?

A rose, a flower. Do not resuscitate. Or if you are, you're in the wrong. Head up there. This is not where to resuscitate. But do not. But do not. I mean, I think if St John is saying that,

they're in the wrong area. Yeah, totally. Got quite a few friends butt tattoos as well. Because it's a good place to get them if you want them hidden and it's silly. Yeah. I got 18 small tattoos, reads this this text including an l on my left hand and an r on my right hand to help can't feel it amazing uh cheyenne how many do you have um first of all can i please just quickly say

i am such a huge fan of you guys you just make my morning every day and then I listen to the podcast on the way home and it hurts me right back up. Hayley loves them but we don't know how to deal with compliments. No, thank you for taking the time to say something nice. And no, it is going through their thick, cold hearts. Alright, good. Thanks, Shane.

Thank you, Shane. It's lovely. Nobody else this morning needs to do this. Now, how many... She should do a compliments hour. Because this has really tickled me, Cheyenne. It's Hayley's love language, Cheyenne. You've really nailed that one. Now, how many tendies do you have?

So I have over 60. I think I'm at about 65 at the moment. I just got the rest of my... Well, the front of my leg finished last week. Oh, does that hurt? That must hurt. Yeah, kneecaps and feet are by far the worst thing. Where there's fat, where there's fatty bits, like I've got one on my lower left back and it's fat there

and it didn't hurt that much. And then I got my ribcage done and I was like, oh dear. Yeah, so definitely kneecaps because they're bony and very like just hard skin so they're extremely painful. My feet as well, again very painful

but at that appointment I got my kneecap done, I booked to get my whole back done including my bum for in a few months. So, yes, it was very addictive. So you're going to be, like, 80% covered? Well, yeah, I've tried to work out how far I'm percentage-wise, but I don't know, yeah.

You've got any on your face? Well over halfway. Yeah, I've got two small ones on my face. What have you got? I've got like a dagger sort of sword thing on one of my ears and on the other side a rose. Those are probably the most disappointing to my mother. Not the face. Amazing.

Cheyenne, thank you. Thank you for sharing. I don't know if we're going to top that. Some messages in. We probably won't top that. All the compliments. My dad's fully covered in tattoos. Stop fishing for compliments. I mean, if if we're going to top that. Some messages in. We probably won't top that. All the compliments. My dad's fully covered in tattoos. Stop fishing for compliments.

I mean, if you want, you know, text him. My dad's fully covered in tattoos, minus the neck and face. He said underarms, armpits were the ones that tingled the most. No, don't. Why does anyone get an armpit tattoo? Yeah. Ow. Somebody messaged in saying that they also have an Eggs Benedict

tattoo. So that's two people with Eggs Benedict tattoos. With bacon? With bacon. The original text message back in saying of course it's got bacon, otherwise it wouldn't be Eggs Benedict No, isn't Benedict ham? Eggs Benedict is ham Well, that's stuffed up there Uh oh. Oh no. It's like getting a

Chinese character and thinking it says love But it doesn't. It says something else. Chinese character and thinking it says love, but it says rice. What is eggs with, hold on. It's a common American saying of two halves of an English muffin each topped with Canadian bacon, a poached egg, and a Hollandaise sauce. Yes. Okay, so what's an eggs benedict with ham?

Probably just an Eggs Benedict. Um. I thought it didn't matter the meat as long as the rest is the same. No, no, no. Well, it's named for the sauce. Yeah, the Hollandaise sauce. But I feel like if you change it to a salmon, it's got to have a different name. Florentine is

spinach. Florentine is spinach. Yeah. Right, okay. Well, nobody's getting an Eggs Florentine tattoo, are they? Eggs Atlantic is smoked salmon in place of Canadian bacon. Right. Okay. That's good. The more you know, eh?

The more you know. Eggs Balmoral is haggis in place of Canadian bacon. Ew. Yuck. That'd be yuck. No one's going to get an eggs Balmoral tattoo, are they? What the hell is that? Play ZM's Fletch for the nightly.

Play ZM. Hey, you on the phone? I bet I can guess your mum's name. I bet I can guess your mum's name. Vaughn will ask today's caller, Amy, five questions about her mum. And if he can name the mum in 15 seconds, you win the cash, Amy. Good morning. Good morning, guys.

Good morning, Amy. Good morning, good morning, good morning. Amy, first of all, we need a hum. We need a... You got your shoes off, babe? Oh, actually, that's a good call. Yeah. Ground.

Earth. Are you earth? Where are you, Amy? I am actually in a car at the moment. Oh, that's going good call. Yeah. Ground. Earth. Are you earth? Where are you, Amy? I am actually in a car at the moment. Oh, that's going to be a real problem because of the rubber on the tyres. And so Amy's not going to be able to hum on earth, but it could go through the wheels and vibrate. We might do a hum.

We might air connect. Okay. We might. We'll use air rather than earth. Okay. You start humming, Amy. I'll join your hum, and we will be psychically linked through atoms. I don't think this is a thing.

You go. It's a hum, Amy. Hum, Amy. Okay. Keep going. Don't stop. Do I hum? You can if you want.

Oh, yeah. I can feel it. That was the most pathetic short connection ever. You were like, yep, I've got it. It's only a couple of seconds to get to Amy. It was enough. She must be close. She must be nearby.

Okay, let's start some questions now that we're linked. What are your mum's siblings' names? There is Leslie, Alison and Kerry. Oh, those are classic mum names, aren't they? Is Kerry a boy or a girl? That's a unisexual name, isn't it, Kerry? She's a girl. Is Leslie a girl?

It's all girls. All girls. Four girls. Far out. Okay, all right. Okay, so I'm kind of getting a Michelle. Oh, my God. It's definitely Michelle.

We should just go now. I feel like Sharon and Tanya. Those are kind of similar names. Oh, the era. Leslie and Sharon. Tanya. I actually had this as a later question, but I might dump it in now. Okay.

How old? Sorry. What year was mum born? 1964 in now. Okay. How old, sorry, what year was mum born? 1964. 64. 64. So she's late. Hell of a vintage.

You've got your Fiona's in there, don't you? Turning 60 this year, is that right? Yeah, yeah. She will be. Well, you've got a big party. Anything planned? Yeah. Anything planned for mum?

No, nothing yet. She doesn't really like parties or drinking much. She doesn't have the drink to have a good time. No, no. Does she, that woman called Kim? Oh, Kim, yeah, Kim's off the boost. Yeah, Kim's not a huge drinker, neither is... Have you got a Barbara?

Jane. Barbara Jane, yeah. It's not Barbara. Get a grip. Barbara's all drink. Do they? Tell me a Barbara that doesn. A Barbara Jane, yeah. It's not Barbara. Get a grip. Barbara's all drink. Do they? Tell me a Barbara that doesn't drink. Okay.

Quite excessively. But you've got your Lynn's. Lynn, yeah, okay. Oh, Lynn, you are... He's in the money. I'm in the pool. I've got to go. Do I have a Catherine?

No, no Catherine. I'm going to put a Catherine in. Yeah, that's a classic from that generation. Could go by Cathy, though. Oh, yeah, but Catherine. I'm going to put a Catherine in. Yeah, that's a classic from that generation. Could go by Cathy though. Yeah, but Catherine. Yeah, close. Yeah, counts. Pets.

What does mum have in the way of pets? At the moment, she has two dogs. At the moment, she said, meaning that she's had other. Tell us a little bit more about the dogs. This isn't a question, that's a demand. One is a border collie and one is like a little fluffy thing.

A little... Okay, so she's got a proper dog and then a not proper dog. Yeah. She's got a real thing and then a silly thing. Margaret.

You're thinking Margaret would be a dog owner? Could be. Okay. That's where you went wrong with your Margaret, Fletch. Oh, yes, please. She hated Major Murray. Tracy put in a...

Oh, Tracy, that's... What's... Good era. You're on... Yeah. What are the fours? Like a Leone or something. What, like a left field?

No, but... No, there's Leslie. There's Leslie. There won't be a Leone. I don't know like a left field? No, but... No, there's Leslie. There's Leslie. There won't be a Leone. I don't know why I got that. And the siblings' names seem pretty straightforward. They're not going out the gate with this name. You know who else loves animals?

Who? Terry Irwin. Terry. But it wouldn't be Terry and Kerry, babe. Are you naming your daughters Terry and Kerry? They could have been twins, though. Could have been. No, no, sorry. No, no, sorry.

No, no, sorry. I'm interrogating. In-house discussion. You shut up. You shut up. You shut up, Amy. Shut up, Amy. Don't give us any of you.

No clues, Amy. No clues. You're just going to chuck a Terry down in case, are you? I'm not going to throw you off. This is your game. Okay, well, you've got a Pat down. A Pat. A Pat.

It's not Pat. It's not Pat. It's definitely not Pat. I might put a Christine, though. I thought you had Christine. My mum has two dogs. Okay. It's a Pat. It's not Pat. It's definitely not Pat. I might put a Christine, though. I thought you had Christine. My mum has two dogs. Okay. It's a classic name.

Off in the link. What magazines does mum buy? Because mums are the only people still buying magazines. She doesn't buy them anymore, but she used to buy, what was it, like the Woman's Weekly or something? Oh, yeah. Classic. Okay.

Might have read about us in there probably in the past. I've only met him once, never again. We've all dipped a toe. Was forced to, won't do it again. Okay, so she's used to buy a woman's day. She's got a Helen. Does she do a Sudoku? Oh, a crossword.

Did she crossword a Sudoku? Not a crossword, but Sudoku. Okay, okay. She's smart. Okay. Makes you smart. I had another question, but Sudokus, yeah. Okay, okay. She's smart. Okay. Makes you smart. I had another question, but you just used the question.

I didn't use the question. It's not, I'm not asking the question. You said you wrote crosswords and Sudokus. It was about the magazines. I was in the magazine realm. I obtained information.

You've still got a question left. Oh, okay. What kind of phone does mum have? I think this says a lot about a woman. Okay. She's got the newer Samsung S24.

Green text. Mum's got green text. Yeah, you're probably just talking on WhatsApp, to be honest. Mum's got the latest Samsung. That's pretty flash. That's pretty good. That's an Ange. That's a big Ange move. You reckon that's big Ange? Oh, Ange always has the latest. Ange. You got a Susan?

Yeah, I think so. Okay. No, I didn't. I will. Okay, Susan, Leslie, Alison, Kiri. Okay. Have you got enough names that you normally would have? I might not have as many as usual.

Yeah, I feel like you... Now, do I have a Joanne? No. Okay. Put that down. Joanne. All right, well, you've asked your five questions, Vaughn. Amy, Vaughn now has 15 seconds to try and

guess your mum's name if you hear mum's name yell out stop that's my mum's name Vaughn your time starts now

Michelle Sharon Tanya Fiona Donna Kim Jane Barbara

Lynn Catherine Margaret Anne Tracy Terry Christine which one

Terry Tracy I thought it was Terry I was like Terry Margaret, Anne, Tracy, Terry, Christine. That's my mum's name. Which one? Terry. Tracy. Oh! I thought it was Terry. I was like, Terry and Kerry? Tracy. Good on you, boy. That's a classic mum's name.

And you've won $100, Amy. You've also fired off the bonus round. While you're on the phone, I'll have a go at guessing your dad's name. One guess for dad's name. One guess. No questions. Tracy and... We know Tracy and Steve, don't we?

Tracy and Steve? Tracy and Steve. That's a classic combo. Yeah, that's a great combo. Tracy and John. Tracy and Terry. That's why Donald a great combo. Trace and John. Trace and Terry. I feel like Donald came to mind. Trace and Donald. You know Donald?

Yeah. Trace and Mike. Trace and Mike. Yeah, Trace and Mike. Mike and Trace. Mike and Trace. Mike and Trace. It's Mike.

It's Mike. It's got to be Mike. It's got to be Mike. It feels like a Mike. It feels like a Mike. It's up to you, though. But it could be a Steve. Okay, you go.

That's your pick. Mike and Trace have had a new daughter, Amy. Oh, she's cute. I'm just giving you some role plays. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mike sits. I don't often feel a mic. Okay.

I don't often feel the vibes of a mic, is what I mean. I've felt a few mics in my time. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I feel like, yeah, okay. is what I mean. I've felt a few Mikes in my time. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I feel like, yeah, okay, it came in strong. You're getting a good vibe. You're going to lock in Mike. Amy, what is Dad's name? Terry.

He's Terry. Wait, your Dad's Terry. I said Terry. You said Terry. You said Terry. I said Terry. I told you I had a vibe for Terry. But I had the female Terry, Terry Irwin.

I said Terry and you didn't acknowledge. Oh, no. It kind of went right over me. I said Terry. I should have latched on because I had the real vibe for Terry. Is it because I didn't hum long enough, isn't it? You pulled off the hum. I should have hummed longer.

You should have. You didn't dock with us all. Yeah. God. Never dock longer. You should have. You didn't dock with us all. Yeah. God. Never docking. Never docked. What was that like hearing your dad's name said 100 times during that and just being like, hmm?

That's him. That's him. That's him. Yeah, it was quite entertaining. You really, you poker-faced it well. Hey, well, yeah, Amy, congratulations. We were close with dad's name, but we guessed mum's name. $100 is all yours.

Well done. Thank you. Thank you, guys. So apparently, apparently there is a new trend on TikTok where young Generation Zs are playing metal songs and saying this is now officially girly pop. And this has upset you? Yeah, I mean, look, I've loved metal since I was like 13 years old.

And I know it is your least favourite music genre of all time. It is the worst music ever. And I can step back and see how people don't like it for sure, but metal runs through the blood. It's very screamy. It runs through the blood. It runs through the blood and once it gets into your veins, you can't get rid of it.

And I think it's very funny that these little boppy little bops are playing it and then being like, it's cute. Now, I'm going to throw now to our expert at the social media desk, producer Shannon, because as our social media producer, I assume Shannon and Gen assume shannon and the person who asked not to be thrown to at the start of this you have your finger right on the pulse of this trend you would hope do you want me to throw to our previous social media producer carwin i would like that a lot okay we'll be discussing this in your end of year review. So, Carwen, why are people calling the likes of Rob Zombie,

There's Rob Zombie, Slipknot, System of a Down, why are they calling this girly pop? They've just decided that, you know what, like some girlies are into this and not into... Taylor Swift, for example. Yeah, not into Taylor Swift. Right. And they've decided that actually it's got quite a fun little cutesy beat.

Look at your shoulders bopping. Oh my God, look at you. I don't know how to describe this, but. I know, so on the videos, guys, they're playing them and they're just doing these cute little like dances to them and they're like, this is officially a boppy banger. Just like looking cutesy, bopping your hair. Yeah.

Now, producer Jared My fellow metal head I throw to you my brother Yup Now last time you and I Went to a metal concert together You went into one of those Circle of death

Circle of death things Should we throw these chicks in there And see how they survive I don't know if they would And they're pretty great Those guys are like Throwing their arms And there's a girl in the middle

Just like Yeah they could go in the centre Yeah they could And they would centre. Yeah, they could. And they would try to kill each other around them. Look, I don't really care how people find their way to metal. You know, it's a gateway. A gateway to what? To a broader musical sense.

And an appreciation of Slipknot. No. This is psychosocial. It's honestly the worst music genre. It's the worst music genre. While people are bopping to it, it's got to pop. I'd rather listen to Christmas carols, actually.

Jeez. That's saying something. I know. That's saying something. It's quite cool that this station is now playing Limp Bizkit. No, we've got bloody Slipknot on at the moment. Yeah.

If you've just tuned in, we are making it. As someone that was there at the time, Limp Bizkit was like second tier. It was a bit of embarrassing. Yeah. This was embarrassing.

All the real metal heads in the 90s didn't like this song. No, no, this isn't metal. But I was an imposter. Anyway, Bop Along Boppies. I actually don't have

a problem with it. As I say, it's a gateway. Once it gets in your blood, it's hard to get rid of it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day

day, day, day, day day. Yeah. Today's fact of the day is that there are 3,194 billionaires in the world and only 11 are openly homosexual. And only one is transgender. That is really limiting the odds for a billionaire sugar daddy for the gays, isn't it? Yes.

Sorry, gays. It really is. You've got your Giorgio Armani. Is he a billionaire sugar daddy for the gays, isn't it? Yes. Sorry, gays. It really is. You've got your Giorgio Armani. Is he a billionaire? Yep. Eight billion in US. That's down a little bit. Peter Thiel.

You know the guy? Oh, yeah. Doesn't he have a place here? Yeah, in Wanaka. There was a big deal about him. He is a gay man. Who is he? So this is on the Wikipedia page, LGBT billionaires.

Okay. And it says, name, net worth, LGBT identity, and where they've got their citizenship. Peter Thiel, former CEO of PayPal. Yeah.

So it says, Peter Thiel, 3.3 billion US dollars, gay man! Oh, okay. Who else? I don't know. Gabbana,

Stefano Gabbana. That's the last half of the Dolce and Gabbana. Dolce not as rich. No, not gay. Oh, okay. Yeah, sorry. Not gay. Stefano Gabbana, gay man residing in Italy.

Okay. Tim Cook? Apple? Yep. I did not know he is a gay man. When did you miss that? I missed the memo. Yeah, there was an update.

I didn't get the newsletter. It came out in the update. iOS Gay 1.2 or something. Guys, Dolce is gay. Is he? Yeah. But, there was an update. I didn't get the newsletter. It came out in the update. Oh, God. iOS Gay 1.2 or something. Guys, Dolce is gay. Is he? Yeah. But he's not a billionaire. Is Dolce a...

Oh, I do apologise. He's a couple of places up. Domenico Dolce. Okay. I would have put Dolce right next to Gibbub. Embarrassing that one of them's more rich, hey? More rich. Embarrassing that I said more rich.

Embarrassing that one of them rich. Embarrassing that one of them's richer than the other. But Dolce goes first so that's why Dolce is a bit richer. No, they're not a couple. $200 million richer.

About. Oh, they were a couple for many years. Were they? I'd never thought about where the names Dolce and Gabbana came from

because do you remember meeting that girl once and her two dogs were called Dolce and Gabbana and that because do you remember meeting that girl once and her two dogs were called Dolce & Gabbana and that was just like the funniest thing I'd ever heard in my life. I was laughing and she wasn't laughing and she's like, why are you laughing? I'm like, because it's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Like, of course they are. Look at these dumb little stupid dogs. Of course they're called Dolce & Gabbana. And she was very upset with me and I wouldn't stop. Sometimes it's a feeding frenzy. Who's our trans billionaire? Our trans billionaire. Thank you very much.

Jennifer Pritzker of the Pritzker family. The Pritzker family most notably known for founding and expanding the Hyatt Hotels empire. Oh, okay. So she's inherited her riches. Is of the family. Jennifer, born James Nicholas Pritzker, is currently 73 years old,

is a billionaire, as she has a role in the Pritzker family. Really interesting life. Served in the US military for a very, very long time. Attained the rank of lieutenant colonel. I don't know if my family owned a massive hotel chain. I'd be serving in the army. I'm not going to war.

I'd be just hanging out at the pool. Same. Charging things to the bar. So she has apparently been very philanthropic with her riches. Okay. Has set up various foundations to enhance the awareness and understanding of the importance of the citizen soldier. That family, the Pritzker family, has 11 billionaires within.

The family. She is one of 11 billionaire heirs in the Pritzker clan. Step it up, Sprouls. What's your family done? Yeah, what have they done? So today's fact of the day is the LGBTQI plus community wildly underrepresented in the list of 3,000 billionaires. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Yeah. As I mentioned very early on in the show, I watched four episodes of reality TV, two of Love Island, two of Maps yesterday. And I love these dating shows, but I've never really gone into lovers blind. And it went huge. And that's the one where they're all in little like pods and they date each other and they don't get to see each other face to face until they get engaged

and then they get married and then it follows them. Because love is blind. It doesn't matter what they look like. Love is blind as far as the eye can see. Unless you chose a minger. But then it's a reality show. None of them are mingers. None of them are... Depends on what you think a minger. But then it's a reality show. None of them are mingers. None of them are...

Depends on what you think a minger is. Minger is a very subjective term. Exactly. One man's minger is another man's... Zinger. Zinger. Boom! Yes.

Teamwork. That was good. But, so, Love is Blind, there's a new season of it. And apparently, and so I've been told by the girlies, and I do include in this, producer Jared, that it's rife with love triangles this season. This season is the most prolific love triangle season of any reality show I've ever seen.

You heard it here. You need to watch this. So this is, I love, what is the definition of a love triangle when not, as long as one of them's involved with two. Yeah, it's kind of an unconnected triangle in this. It's not that. That could just be a love line. A love triangle's

got to be, everybody's got to be into the next person in the triangle. Love line with a kink in the middle. Love peace. Yes, yes, yes. Okay. But this season, especially and I won't give any spoilers, but there are multiple people who are ready to propose to two people. So these people are so committed to two people, they're like, I would marry either one of these women.

And there's multiple women who are like, I would say yes to multiple men. That's just really not how marriage is supposed to work. And it kind of gets to the point where a woman just says yes to one of the guys because he was first in. Yeah, first in, first served. I will say that one of the characters who is in a love triangle, his name is Jeremy. Yes.

He spells his name J-E-R-A-M-E-Y. Yeah, it's annoying. Oh, okay. Well, I mean, he doesn't. You've got that wrong. Yeah, you've got that wrong, Jeremy's parents. Anyway, love triangles. I don't think I've ever been in a love triangle, you know, in that. You're vying for someone with someone else.

Yeah. Also vying for them. Yeah. Would that be the definition? Yeah, probably. Yeah, like you're like two people going for the same person. I think we could equate it as a triangle. With someone in there, also with someone.

However you want to define it. I want to get some calls and some messages in about whether or not you've ever been part of a love triangle. Perhaps this is happening right now. I'm trying to think. What about a relationship where there's an overlap? That's a different game. That's a different game.

Is that a love triangle? Unless the person you moved to was also with the person you were with. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, that is a love triangle. That sounds like a different guy. Is that a love triangle? Unless the person you moved to was also with the person you were with. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now that is a love triangle. That sounds like a love circle. You're getting your shapes confused. Three points. Three points, okay.

Yeah, or three marks along a perfect circle. Who knows? Okay, so you want to take some calls. About love triangles. Have you ever been in a love triangle? Yes. Perhaps you and a friend were fighting for the same guy and he wanted you both and he couldn't decide.

And well, it was juicy. Oh my God, someone just literally said. This has been, oh no, no. Sorry, I read that wrong. I like this definition. A love triangle is usually depicted as a rivalry in which two people are pursuing or involved. Yes, pursuing. in a romantic...

Yeah, so not just have a crush on, but like both like going for it. And the point of the triangle, the peak of the triangle, is also open. That to me is a love fork in the road. A love fork in the road. You don't analyse the shape bit too much, Vaughan.

You're getting caught up on the shape of it all. So have you ever been involved in a love triangle? Maybe you've been a love rival? All 800 dials at M. Now, someone's written in what feels like a sort of a log line for a naughty video. Okay. Love triangle with my Pilates teacher and another guy. Oh, wow.

That's a threesome. No. No, it's a love triangle. No, they didn't all get together Okay 0800 What a solve A lot of problems You can text her as well

9696 Have you been involved In a love triangle Wow There's juice flowing We want to know If you've ever been involved In a love triangle

Which is normally A rivalry Of two people Going after The one The one person Yes Because apparently that is

rife on the new season of Love is Blind. Man, we're getting some messages in, some of which we are unable to read. Yeah, okay, there are some that we just cannot read. One had our jaws on the floor. Yeah. Fletch simply refused to believe it. You know who you are. It's wild. We can't read it though.

So, some messages in. I would really like before we finish to find someone like person A liked person B, person B liked person C, person C liked person A. We can have a closed triangle, but we haven't found one of these yet. No. But some messages in. They are spicy. I was in a love triangle with my boss. My husband at the time was his apprentice.

I am now married to said boss. Wait, oh, okay. So she was working somewhere. Her husband was there as an apprentice and there was a boss. And she was like, I like the boss. And now she's married to the boss. And does the husband still work? Probably not there.

I feel like he's left, hasn't he? I wouldn't feel so. Sam, when were you in a love triangle? What happened? So my husband and I were married for 15 years. He got a best friend. And then I kind of got attracted to the best friend. But the best friend was also married.

So the best friend got a divorce. And then two weeks later, I asked for a separation. And so then me and the best friend got together. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. So when you, okay, so when you were both with the other people, were you outwardly flirting with each other? No. Oh.

No, we were just friends. Right, but you could feel a... She lingered on one of your friends. No No We were just friends Right But you could feel She lingered She lingered on One of your friends There was a rumbling Chemistry

We had a connection Yeah Had you talked about it Or he was just like The fact that I'm having These feelings Means I probably Shouldn't be married

Or he was like Let's get that one Out of the way And get on to this We were To be honest I think we were both in denial about it. Yeah, right. And are you together still to this day?

Yeah. Well, what happened was after he got the divorce and I got the divorce and then we got together, my husband actually came back and said, I want you back. So I was like, but I'm already with this guy now, and he's like, I don't care. So I was like... Who was his best friend? So in the end,

I ended up in a relationship with both of them. Oh, wow. Okay. Oh my god, you're the peak of the triangle now. You were the peak. And then they're okay with it? Well, they were okay as long as I kept it separate. So I actually lived half of the week at home with my husband and my three children. Wait, with his children as well?

I assumed this was... No children. Yeah, and I lived half of the week at my boyfriend's house with his two children. He's got children too? Wow. Wow. And is this still going on? It lasted about six months until I

decided that because my husband was okay with it as long as he was my husband. But I decided that actually I only wanted him to be my boyfriend and I wanted my boyfriend to be my husband. Oh my god. What a triangle!

So you are still with the friend who is now the husband? I'm still, yeah, so this, so that was about a year and a bit ago that the husband sort of bowed out, yeah. Wow. And are they still friends?

No. I don't know how you would be able to maintain that. I know it's Thursday. Is that Caller of the Week? 100% Caller of the Week. I don't think we're going to top this either for a love triangle or for a Caller of the Week. Sam, we're going to hook you up with our Caller of the Week prize.

It's a $50 McCafe voucher thanks to our mates at McCafe. Well done. Share with your husband. Thank you. That totally makes it worth it. Which one? Which one? The second one.

We've got a close triangle. I once worked with a girl who was in a relationship. It was a bit on the rocks. She pursued me, and then so did her girlfriend, but then they were still together, but then they were each individually having a go with me as well. But neither of them knew about them having a go. That is an all-female close triangle.

That is juicy. Wow, this is juicy. We want to know if you've been part of a love triangle before. And a lot of you have. Some of them are webs, not triangles. Standing ovation to our lesbian listeners who have provided me not one, but two fully closed love triangle triangles. Where the person is pursuing the next person

and the next character. But Game of Papers is rock. It does make sense when all the genders are attracted to the same gender, doesn't it? Yeah. Otherwise you've got to rely on a bisexual. And I'll tell you what, very unreliable. Very unreliable people.

Flip-floppers. Greedy flip-floppers. Everything is potential to them. You said it. A bit of that, a bit of that. Come on, concentrate on the task. I can't concentrate. People are blown away like we are ourselves.

Some said, how on earth do people have the time or energy for these relationships? Yeah. Like one's hard enough. Yeah, one's. Keeps you on your toes. So my sister who was gay Found out her girlfriend Was cheating on her And got in contact

With the woman To figure out what had happened And then they hooked up But they were still Hooking up the other way as well Fully closed Lesbian Love triangle

But it blew apart Because now only two of them Are married Right My BFF was an absolute stunner I was pretty enough But boys would drop at her feet And twice when we were growing up She had boyfriends Right. My BFF was an absolute stunner. I was pretty enough, but boys would drop at her feet. And twice when we were growing up, she had boyfriends who after spending all that time together fell for me

and I fell for them. Total nightmares. I love my BFF, but ultimately had to back out of both. But it was a bit of a love triangle situation. Yeah, there's a triangle. Two identical twins had a crush on me. I had to pick which one I liked more, which is very hard when they look and act exactly the same.

Yeah. I mean, just pick one. It doesn't matter, does it? Yeah, do you know what I mean? Like eenie meenie. Eenie meenie them. Yeah. Twins love it when you eenie meenie them. Don't go up to them and be like eenie meenie. Just do it quiet. Yeah. I wouldn't even do it out loud. Maybe just dart your eyes back and forth. They'll know you're eenie meenie

mine. Eenie meenie meenie. My mother said to count to ten. I love you, Cassandra. I'm Vicky. Oh, damn it. My husband and I had a relationship with a much younger lady. We later found out that we'd both been pursuing her on the side

as individuals as well. While they were together or pre. No, while they were having their relationship with her. They were also doing stuff without the partner, with the young lady. Have you shared the A plus B? No, because that's all a wife swap. Ah, okay. That's a straight partner swap.

Join us next week for the swap, Fona. Did you swing and then just stay on the other side of the swing? Wow. God, there's a lot of juiciness in here. God, there are some, listener, if you could only know what some of these

messages say, you would be aghast. It's a world much like the Sex Up Life podcast, which is opening eyes in season two. This is a free plug by a very important broadcaster. This is a free plug from an absolute OG broadcasting influencer. Forget your social media. This guy used to convince people an absolute, you know, OG broadcasting influencer.

Forget your social media. This guy used to convince people to do things just with the power of his mouth. Wow. On Sex.Life, like, this stuff happens. I'm like, where are these people? They're driving past you on the motorway right now. They're everywhere. Look to the left.

I have an affair. That's probably. Oh, another one in the bag. It's a Versace bag as well. If you enjoyed that, give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell your mates. You don't sound sincere there, boy. I'm just reading what's written here.