ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 22nd May 2023

Episode Date: May 21, 2023

Top 6: Mozzies  Silly Little Poll!  Turkish Delight Cocktails!  Vaughan, Gift-Giving King!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Thanks to McCafe. Great things are brewing, one cup at a time. Good morning, welcome to the show. Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley, three minutes past six. Large dogs on buses. That's pretty cute.

Yeah, that'll make bus riding so much more fun. Yeah, but they'd take up a whole seat. Yeah, good for them, they're big boys. No, but like, I'm just talking when it's peak time. No, they'd have to stand. They wouldn't sit on the seat, would they? But then you can't have them standing in the lane. They'd take up too much room. But cute. Pretty cute.

Step over a big Labrador. Yeah. Who's a good boy? It's like when you're on a plane and someone's got like a dog on there. Yeah. Like a guide dog or something. Oh my God. Oh my God. You're not supposed to go up to them. I know you're not. No.

You give them a sandwich and stuff and they've undone years of training. Sorry, doggy. Coming up on the show, silly little poll. If you live at home and you're over 18, should you pay some kind of rent or board? I don't know. I got out of there as soon as I could. Yeah, same. For no reason other than I guess I was proving a point.

Did you have to pay money when you were living in the caravan out the back? No, so the caravan was just over summer holidays. But when I lived in the shed, no. But I was given like, you will start by this date and then you will soon after be enrolled in police college. So get out of this house. Imagine born as a policeman. That'd be pretty wild. I don't think you could do it. So corruptible. You'd have a in police college. So get out of this house. Imagine born as a policeman. It'd be pretty wild.

You could do it. So corruptible. You'd have a great police moustache. You would. Yeah. You would. Yeah.

Well, that's a silly poll. I'd be pulling people over. Sometimes I see a cop car and I see a suspicious looking car. I'm like, oh, if I was that cop, I'd just pull that car over

for a look. You can't. You can't pull. No, you say the taillights out and then you smash it with your... You say it's random with your testing, if I was that cop, I'd just pull that car over for a look. You can't. You can't pull. No, you say the taillights out and then you smash it with your... You say it's random breath testing, don't you?

No, you smash the backlight with your police banner. Oh, now we're getting a bit 1980s New York City cops. Yeah, that doesn't feel right. You break lights out. I'd just say it was random breath testing

and then have a bit of a squiz around the car. That's what they say, isn't it? So you're already lying as a theoretical cop. Oh, dude, absolutely. My body cam wasn't on. No, it never is.

It never is. And the batteries are in and I have to charge it. Just every time I hit someone, it's not working. Yeah. Take a little bribe,

see a couple of boobies. You'd let a hot people on speeding tickets. Oh, yeah. Well, no, you're like just a little flirt to get off a speeding ticket?

You'd let that off. Nah, ticket them at the end of it. They thought they got away with it. I'd ticket them anyway. So sore. You've got free boobs and they've got a ticket anyway. And that's why it was a bad idea to even think about it. Top six coming up on the show.

Yeah, a flavour palette of mosquitoes has been released. This is what they like about humans. So I've got the top six flavoured humans that mosquitoes just can't get enough of. Well, this news came out of Germany over the weekend, but it actually happened in 2020. I guess there's been some kind of report into the incident. Right.

Officials at a hospital in Western Germany have expressed regret after it emerged that one of the surgeons went ahead with an operation and there wasn't enough people to help. So he got the cleaner in to help with the surgery.

Now, it didn't result in any complications of the patient, but the doctor has been fired. Yeah. With a surgery. Now, it didn't result in any complications of the patient, but the doctor has been fired. Yeah. Does it detail how the cleaner helped? Yeah, was he just holding something open? Need an extra pair of hands and you hold that open. So the patient who had received a local anesthetic,

what is that? Is that when you just get an area? Yeah. An area known. Became restless. The doctor asked a nearby cleaner to hold the man's leg and pass surgical instruments. Oh, no. Yeah, come on.

No, that's too involved. That's like if dad's a mechanic. Or mum. And then a little hand passing the spanners. And holding a piece of the car. Yeah, he's under the car. He can't get out. Give him a break.

Oh, I don't know. Not fair, not fair. Well, the incident came to light after a hospital manager walked past and saw the cleaner with bloody gauzes in the hands in the operating theatre. But then it's just kind of, yeah, he's just helping, isn't he? No. No, you don't want that. No, I'm for it.

Let him help. Yeah, because what if the guy had, like, kicked and, I don't know, made things worse? Or you'd call more nurses. Yeah, but they're out there, aren't they? Strap a leg, strap it down. They've all moved to Australia. Yeah.

For the better money. Oh, no, this is German. Yeah, probably German. They've all moved to Australia for better money. They've all moved to Australia for the sun. Everybody the better money. Oh, no, this is German. Yeah, probably. Probably Germans have all moved to Australia for better money. They've all moved to Australia for the sun. We're all moving there. Everybody's moving there. Should we go?

To Australia? Yeah, the three of us. And do what? We could get a nice sort of loft apartment we all share in Melbourne and we could eat nice food. Yeah, but what do we do for work? We would take the radio industry by storm. They wouldn't even know what hit them.

Right. I've heard small snippets of Australian radio. Didn't impress you? That don't impress me much. Right. To be fair, you can tell that to bloody Kyle. Yeah, but we've got snakes. They've got snakes.

Yeah, but they've got wombats, which are cute. Yeah. Have you seen the video Of the girl bottle feeding the wombat Yeah The baby wombat It's pretty cute Cute as heck

We could have a pet koala They're my favourite animal In the whole world So now we've got A cool loft apartment We're going out For bougie dinners every night We're dominating

With a koala and a wombat Okay it does say You can see why All the nurses are going Let's go You can see why Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

Do you know this week it took me a week to clean my house? Because I was like avoiding little bits of it, you know? You are living in a renovation zone though. Yeah, so it's a real construction site. Constant cleaning. And because we're working on the front little room, that was the room that had the wardrobe Aaron was using. So he had to move out.

So what he did was he moved all his clothes out and used the floor. Floor-drope. Floor-drope. Yeah. And then I came home from where did I been? I'd been in Wellington, right? And then I got my suitcase and I just added that to the floor-drope. And then any time I get changed, it was the floor-drope.

And then we couldn't, we didn't even know which clothes were clean, and this is also in the room where our pee bucket is, and I was like, I'm hating this. So it's last week, as soon as my show finished, I was like, that's what I'm going to do this week, is sort that all out. It took me so long. Anyway, I'm saying these cleaning things because there's some cleaning stats,

how we feel about cleaning. It's a survey out of the US. Is it that we all hate it? Yeah, 90% of participants in this survey said they get a little anxious around cleaning their home. That's how I was feeling. You know when it just gets carried away and it just goes too far and you're like, ugh, I don't even know where to start.

But if you get in a mood for a clean, and it's one of those cleans where you're lifting the couch to vacuum under it. Don't stop me. Or you take the fridge out and do behind the board. And you vacuum behind the fridge, but then some of the dust is, I don't know how, but it's immune to a vacuum.

So you've got to get in there with a mop. It's on the wall. Yeah. Mop it out, baby. That's a good clean. Yeah. And then when you're finished. That's a good claim. Yeah. Yeah. And it just, the house feels,

and then when you're finished, you have a shower and you come out and everything feels clean, you included. And then you keep. And then I chuck some fresh sheets on too. And you keep leaving the room and then coming back and looking at it like, yeah, that's nice.

I did good. Opening up the wardrobe doors, it's all sorted. Yeah, that's nice. So 90% feel anxious about it. Half of people admitted that they pretend not to see a mess Just so they can avoid Being the one in the household to clean it

Isn't that you when you wake up And you see a cat vom You just pretend you haven't seen it No no no you pretend it wasn't there when you left You say it hadn't happened Your wife is not going to carbon date that spew To see when it was made She doesn't have that skill

Or a dead rat Sometimes though if it's like that spew to see when it was made. She's incapable of it. Yeah, she doesn't have the scientific equipment. Yeah. Or a dead rat, like half a dead rat corpse. Sometimes though, if it's like a spew or a poo and it's started to harden around the edges, there's a bit of a clue

that it might have been there for longer than an hour. You just add some water to that. Or you give it a spritz. Yeah. You don't want the oils to start seeping out. Yeah, you get a bit of a spritz

before you leave. Well, you're moistening this. Yeah, so it looks fresher by the time she you leave. What, you're moistening this? Yeah, so it looks fresher by the time she gets there. She'll think it has literally just happened. Or turn on the heat pump and say it was a very dry air. Yes. A lot of people, 44% of people would admit that they neglect

areas that are too hard to reach. Top of the fridge, top of your cabinets and stuff. I don't do the cracks in the top bits. Maybe once a year or a spring clean. Yeah. A lot of people cutting corners. See, you need to decide on the day, are we doing a tidy or are we doing a clean?

A deep clean, yeah. Are we putting things away or am I cleaning things? I've done a put away. Yeah. For sure I've done a put away. And now we don't have a floor drobe. I got one of those cheap, like, you know, can probably

only take 5kgs racks from somewhere. Oh, one of those fold out dirt. I got a real good one of those. You absolutely could have borrowed it because it's been underutilised, but I will not get rid of it because it costs a fortune. We went to a place, we didn't have a wardrobe

when we first started, when we first lived together. Yes. But we bought the cheap ones and they were always breaking. Yeah, this one is flimsy. You go to the place that supplies the stores. Oh, yeah. And we got one and it's like old and it's lived in the garage for ages now, but it's still a sturdy ass.

You've got a showroom. I've got a showroom hanger. I've got a cheap showroom rack. Are you showing your new range for Spring 23? It's my discount rack. Yeah, you do the discount sales 50% off. It's a strong rack. It's too late now. I've bought a cheap one.

Well, when that breaks next week. If Aaron grabs a shirt off it, it sways. It's got no social integrity. Do they make those so shit? They are so shit. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. From the bustling ZM think tank, this is the top six. Well, hello there.

Sound like a mosquito saying hi. The worst is when they're obviously on your head by your ear. Oh, my gosh. And you hear them do take off. And you're like, what did you get? I have mosquitoes love me. A juicy love. Oh, yeah, right on a juicy. Oh, horrible place to get them.

I'm not edible. I don't get bitten that much. Oh, yeah, right on a juicy. Oh, horrible place to get in. I'm not edible. I don't get bitten that much. No, neither. I'm very tasty. And when I do, they don't, like, Aaron will go, like, they'll go, like, festery. Like, he'll just, almost allergic reaction to them. Yeah. Whereas, like, if I have one, I'll be like, oh, there's a dog.

My brother used to have to get, remember we'd cut your own sticky plasters? Yeah. My mum would cut a big, big thick wide one and put them over because he was shocked he'd just sit there itching it and just open it right up

it was shocking at it but yeah there's something about our family we do tend to get mosquito very pasty and

white I think oh I think it's what that is horrendously so you just look so delicious we do look delicious well there's been

a big experiment. Oh, this is the other thing. We laugh about it when we put a bit of Zavirax itch cream on. Yeah. But in a lot of places, mosquitoes are very dangerous. Well, it's how a lot of illnesses are spread. Malaria. So much malaria.

Dengue fever. All of the fevers. All of the fevers. Yellow. Dengue fever. Remember Zika remember Zika Zika yes

oh my god take me back to 2016 no when was it it was around the Rio Olympics wasn't it yeah 2016 was a big one in Brazil and then it kind of

the carry on 2017 and then there was like Fiji was on the list and yeah how could it get any worse than this I cancelled my holiday

to Jamaica because I wanted to have a baby at the time. You did. It was a blessing, though, because for my mum's 60th, we were going to take her to Fiji, but then my brother's wife and my sister, who aren't the same person, were pregnant at the time, so they couldn't go.

Oh, no. What a shame. What a shame. What a shame. What a shame. More breakfast buffet for you. Yeah. Almond croissants.

Yeah. Yeah. Say no more. Dude, I love an almond croissant. Same. You're like, you're in Fiji. How did this almond croissant get here? Yeah.

This is in France. Nom, nom, nom, nom. I'ma eat. So there's some scientific experiments going on at the moment to see what it is about the sense of humans that mosquitoes like. Yeah. Because there are people that are more prone to it. Yeah.

And more edible than others. Apparently eucalyptol, which is found in the eucalyptus tree, apparently very good for getting rid of repelling mosquitoes. Oh, okay. Yeah.

But they're working on it at the moment. They said there's this massive tent and the mosquitoes come in through a pipe and then they get to pick watch buffet. So basically they are like us at the Fijian Resorts Breakfast Buffet and they're hitting almond croissants again and again and again. The top six flavors in humans that mosquitoes can't get enough of. Number six on the list.

A little bit of lovely barbecued human. Tanned, not burnt. Because if you're burnt, then that's like your steak's well done. You're a bit too crispy to break through. Crispy to break through. Yeah, exactly. But tanned, can't get enough of it. Just a lovely slow-cooked human.

Number five on the list of the top six human flavours mosquitoes can't get enough of. A little bit of human pud. If you've been on the sweets. Always run for a little bit of blood pud. So yeah, if you've been on the sweets, they're like that because you're their pudding. Number four on the list of the top six human flavours that mosquitoes love.

White chocolate human. That's when you're European but really enjoyed 90s rap. A little white chocolate for the mix. Yes, Eminem is getting eaten. Oh, he is getting sucked dry. Number three on the list of the top six, beg your pardon, human flavours that mosquitoes love.

Pickled human. If you've been drinking too much. They love a tangy little, you know how sometimes you'll open a jar of pickled onions and you just eat them all and your mouth will be all raw. And then the fart starts. Started on those McClure's pickles. Oh, you love McClure's pickles.

So good. Well, pickled human is the equivalent. If you're drinking too much, mosquitoes can't get enough. Number two on the list of the top six human flavours that mosquitoes love. Champagne human. That's when you're a human from the Champagne region of France. Otherwise, you're just a bubbly. You've got a bubbly personality.

Yes. I'm bubbly. Bubbly, but from that Champagne region. I'm more brute as well. Yeah. Thicker flavour. Thicker. Stronger. Yeah. Get really dry. Dry. And number one on the list of the top six human flavours that mosquitoes love,

spicy humans. They're hot people. Just like us. All of us. Mosquitoes appreciate a hotting. Yep. Yeah. You're saying that's why you get eaten more.

Well, I mean. That's what he's saying. One of those. Because you're the hottest of the group. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, maybe. I don't want to say it, but you guys have said it, so I'll agree. We could put it to the people.

We could silly little poll it. Like, if you were a mosquito, which one of us would you eat? Would you eat? Whose blood would you suck? Which one of these tasty ankles would you drive your pointy nose needle into? That is today's Subsex. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM.

It was a survey that looked at adults who drink wine regularly. Now, I'd be in that category. I know you would. Vaughan? I enjoy a wine. Yeah. Yeah, a little whisky. Yeah, that's probably more the drink of choice.

Would you go for a beer? Yep. Like during the week? I'd go for anything. You're so versatile, aren't you? Yeah, yeah. Vodka the drink of choice. Would you go for a beer? Yep. Like during the week? I'd go for anything. You're so versatile, aren't you? Yeah, yeah. I'd go gin, rum. Yeah, oh, rum.

I love a rum. Any booze, we'll drink. Yeah. Okay, so I think we can include ourselves in this. It looked at our personality differences based on our favourite style of wine. Okay. Some things that came from this.

Those who enjoy red wine tend to be more introverted. Okay. Those who enjoy white wine tend to be, sparkling wine or white wine, tend to be, could call themselves extroverted. And those who enjoy a rosé call themselves an ambivert, which means you'd be a bit sort of in the middle. Because I'd say I'm a mix of introvert and extrovert.

You're an ambivert. No, but I like a red wine and I like a sparkling. Yeah, but if you pour those in a cup together, that's a rosé. That's how rosé works. It'd be a sparkling rosé. Yeah, delicious. A pinot noir, sparkling. Yeah. Okay. I wouldot noir, sparkling. Yeah.

Okay. I would say I'm an extrovert. This may shock you. That's shocking news. And I enjoy white and sparkling predominantly. But again, I like all other wines. I went off rosé for a while. I feel like I overdid it.

You know when rosé was like hot? I'm not a fan of rosé. I like it when it's in a frosé. Yeah, of course. When it's frozen and full of sugar. That's because you're trash. Yeah. Yes.

What else did they deduce? Even though as sparkling wine drinkers we're included in the extroverted category, apparently at a dinner party or at a party they would tend to be more of an observer. So that doesn't line up. That's a bit sort of strange. The rosé drinkers were the party planners of the group.

Other white wine drinkers would be, I guess, sort of vain in that they would be taking lots of selfies and being the life of the party. Okay. White wine drinkers tended to be more indoor type, whereas red wine drinkers tended to be more indoor type, whereas red wine drinkers tended to be more of an outdoor. Sit around a fire sort of situation. Sit around a fire with a nice sort of mulled wine.

Yeah. Red wine drinkers more likely to be early birds. Not if you've had too much, though. Nothing kills like a red wine hangover. Yeah. Well, that's why they're early risers, because you know when you drink lots, you're always up early. Oh, my God, yes.

You've got to hate that. You've got the dries. Yeah. On Saturday night, me and Aaron had, I want to say, 50 espresso martinis. Not that many. But because we had so many, and we woke up at like 3ish. I think he was like 4. I was like 3.

3 a.m.? Yeah, and that was like 4, I was like 3. 3am? Yeah, and that was our day. What time did you go to bed? I would not go back to sleep. I don't know, like 10, 11? Because you had a lot of coffee. I know, but they were delicious. Talking about pets, those who prefer sparkling wine

and those who prefer red wine, likely to be dog people. No, but that's me and I'm a cat person. I know, but these are the stats. This just feels like horoscopes. This just feels like a scattergun approach to wine. It feels like this has been released by some wine magazine. Do you want to do it because I've got some horoscope facts. What?

Within the wine. Your star sign may also say something about your favourite wine. Oh, here we go. What are you guys? What are you? I'm cancer. You're a cancer. Prefer white wine. What are you, Guy? What are you? I'm a cancer. You're a cancer. Prefer white wine.

What are you? Pisces. Pisces? You're not even in this. So eat it. What? Libras prefer sparkling wine. That's me.

So it must be right. It must be right. So you don't even know. What? You don't even know. What? You don't even know. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Silly little boy. Silly little boy. Silly little boy. Silly little boy. Silly little boy. Side note, how would you spell willikers?

As in geez willikers. What? Have you ever heard that word? Geez willikers, mister. Gee whiz. Gee whiz is gee willikers. W-I-L-L-I-C-K-E-R-S. C-K-E-R-S.

I just went straight I-K-E-R-S. What's the origin of that? Geez willikers. Great question went straight IKERS. What's the origin of that? Great question. Gee willikers. Is it like some catchphrase from a TV show? It's like some 1930s. Gee willikers is a song. Gee willikers origin.

Irish Gaelic. All right. Okay. Makes no sense. All right. Yeah. Means will of God, basically. Irish.

Irish. New York Irish. And gee will of God, basically. Irish. Irish. New York Irish. And gee willikers, mister. Well, if you're living at home with your parents and you're over 18, should you be paying rent? Yes, of course, or no way? I... Absolutely not.

I turned 18 when I lived there. They had me. They are lucky to be in my company. I turned 18 in I lived there. They had me. They are lucky to be in my company. I turned 18 in like October of like my last year of high school. And then I moved out that summer. Because you got held back a year, right? You're a bit of a thickie. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You're a bird of a thickie. What year did I do twice? All of them. Year one. All of them. Year one they knew. You're still at high school when you're 26. Yeah.

I'm going to do it. This year's my year. I'm going to do it. And then when I did, I was like, mum, I've done it. I don't know. I did good. I've seen better days. Yeah.

I've done it yesterday. Well, 85% of people think you should. Yes, of course, you should be paying your parents some form of rent if you're living at home and you're over 18. I'd love to know the breakdown of that 85% that have a sibling still living at home not paying anything and they're resentful. Very much so. Because you know that's a thing. Yes, you definitely should, said Fiona,

but I'm not currently charging my 21-year-old. Oh, Fiona. Oh, Fiona, please. Oh, Fiona, please. He's going to leech off you until you kick him out. Oh, Fiona, please. Oh, Fiona, please. He's gonna leech off you until you kick him out. Or her. Or her. Very Oh, yeah, you said sibling. Nah, you know

it's a waste of guys. It's a summer. It's a dude. It's a dude. It's a waste of dudes. Trish said, I was lucky I had to live at home during the pandemic age 32 and was unemployed and I wasn't expected to pay. Oh, look. That's different. No, no, no. That's welcoming the little bird

back to the nest. Yeah. Tough times. Yeah, you're unemployed and you're in the middle of a pandemic. Totally. Yeah.

You come back to the bosom of mother. Oh. Get back into that bosom. A lot of people move home and save a bit of money before an OE. Yeah.

But then should the parents Yeah, or a wedding. You should still be paying a little bit, right? You should be doing more chores. You're still using power and you're doing chores. I've just remembered I lived with Aaron's parents for a year and I didn't pay anything when I was 27. Oh, you monster. Did you take them out for a thank you dinner?

I wish. Oh, wow. Okay, did you take them out for a thing? One year of all the costs. I will take you for a thank you dinner? They wish. Oh, wow. One year of all the costs. I will take you for a thank you dinner. But I brought great vibes to the household. Okay. Where do you take the parents for a thank you dinner?

Lone Star. Yes, they love that. Who's disappointed at Lone Star? No one. Thank you for having me for an entire year. This is nice. Go easy on the drinks. Oh, my God, a stuffed chicken breast. My word.

It's named after, do they know that there's already someone called Johnny Cash? Depends. If working, yes, you should be paying rent, but reduced. If studying, no rent. That's from Mel. Okay. Kat, no way. You sacrifice freedom to save money or vice versa. I left home at 18, but I wish I'd

stayed home a little bit longer and saved some money. It is nice to be at home. But then it's also nice to not have your parents clean up. Get that man out of your bed. Don't tell me what to do. This is my room. My house, my

rules. Yeah. You will not have any men in your bed. Manny says, I paid $200 a week until I moved out. You have to. Laundry, dinners made, little to no cleaning. You know, these things don't come for free. Totally. If you're earning money, says Rachel,

you should absolutely be paying rent at your parents' house. Lisa, if you're a grown-ass adult, get a grip. Pay rent or off you trot. No room for freeloaders. Yes, both my kids pay rent. Technically, it's bored because... It is bored for tax purposes. If they had jobs, it all went towards food. No free ride in life, sunshine.

Yeah, good. Whoa, hard. Also, your parents' sex life has to be put on hold. They can't do those loud... Oh, the lounge stuff. The lounge stuff. They can't do the lounge stuff. They can't do those loud... Oh, the lounge stuff. The lounge stuff. They can't do the lounge stuff. Oh, my God, yeah, the lounge stuff.

The kitchen stuff, that's off. Yeah, you're coming and going as you please. Yeah. Brianne says, as soon as you start working, either a third of your wage or your fair share of household bills, whichever is less, if parents don't need financial help, they can sneakily put it aside for the kid to later use on a house or a car or uni, but I believe we should be teaching kids real life.

Forced savings. Real life is when you pay rent and then your landlord gives you all that money back as rent so you can buy a house and all the seats. That's not real life, Brianna! Also, no matter how much money they put aside for rent, it's not even going to make a dent in a deposit. Oh, never.

Sorry, it is a reality check for you. It's not even going to make a dent in a deposit. Oh, never. Sorry, it is a reality check for you. Yeah. I certainly wouldn't be saying no if my landlord gave me all my rent back. Can you go retrospectively all the houses I've rented over the years? Can I have that back? That'd be nice, wouldn't it?

Well, there you go. Don't expect a free ride. Nothing in life is free. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Yummy, yummy, yummy in my tummy. It's so rich and good.

We should do a yummy, yummy on Navy's biscuits. Oh, Navy does make amazing biscuits. I just haven't had a biscuit like it. It was a shortbread

but it was a biscuit and the icing on the top kind of held it all together. It was a hell of a biscuit. And I said, where did you get these biscuits from? They were promo biscuits.

I said, where did you get these biscuits from? And she said, I made them. Did she give me the recipe? She made me another batch. Now, I've had a package delivered from Nestle

addressed to myself because you know I've had a package delivered from Nestle. Yes. Addressed to myself because, you know, I've mentioned. Big Swedes. Big Swedes. Is Nestle a Swede word? I don't know. It's an American company, right? I don't know the origins.

They obviously know that in the past. A Swiss multinational food and drink processing conglomerate. So that really made it sound less romantic to the Swiss. It really did. The largest publicly held

food company in the world. Yeah, well they know their stuff, don't they? They make a heap of stuff

and one of those, a new product today, Kit Kat Milky Bar. Yeah. Now it comes in the big block and the fingers. And they've sent us some of these. Because, you know, I've mentioned a lot on the show that I auditioned to be the Milky Bar kid.

Yes. And they gave it to that kid with glasses. You would have been so cute. I used to be blonde. I used to be blonde. Have you seen a photo of me when I was blonde? Yeah, you're so cute. Thank you.

I would have been a great Milky Bar kid. I don't know how to ride a horse. And I don't know if I want to learn and I don't know if I want to learn. I don't know if I want to learn. I probably wouldn't have done that. What do you mean? The horse takes charge. You just hold off.

Yeah, I don't like horses. Weird. They're too powerful. Too powerful for how smart they are. Too unpredictable. Yeah, if you're going to be that strong, you need to have a bit more going on upstairs. And be less skitterish. So this is basically a Kit Kat that instead of the dairy milk,

Nestle chocolate is white chocolate, but it's Milky Bar. Now, we had the gold white chocolate Maltesers last week. Yes. When are we going to start getting things that I'm into? Like Perky Nana. Can you give me the bit that you haven't bitten? What are you doing? I'm having a bite of it

You guys know how you eat a Kit Kat? Oh my god You eat it finger by finger You might as well have eaten it sideways I've just taken a munch Out of the side You don't take a munch out of the side of a Kit Kat You break off a finger at a time?

What is wrong with you? You've done two fingers. Never start with two fingers. Always start with one finger and work your way up to two. Easing with one. I've just taken two at a time. You might as well have, literally, you might as well have bitten into the side of him. I tell you what, it's delicious.

Are you being intentionally provocative or are you just, were you dropped as a kid? No, I'm just a monster. I was dropped as a kid. No, I'm just a monster. I was dropped as a kid. That's good. Oh, no. Because do you remember when they did the Kit Kat Chunkies, the white Chunkies? Yeah. They were good.

They were so good. I'm going to put it out there. I don't like Kit Kats. Don't you? No. You've never liked them? No. It's Kit Kats in the middle of Kit Kats are made up of Kit Kats that didn't pass the test, eh?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, no, that is so sweet. Yeah, that's what I like. Do you want to try some, Bourne? Well, they're out today. I'll try some. But I will literally not be able to eat that

and then talk because my mouth will just be like, now it's time to coat you in saliva. Oh no. I can take this as Fletch in food form. Oh yeah,

dude's got a wild sweet tooth, eh? If you've got a sweet tooth and you love white chocolate, these are completely up your alley. Daddy's got a sweet tooth. It's a no to me. I'm really in the mood for like a cheese scone. You know what I mean? That's where I'm at today.

Yeah, well, we're not doing cheese scones in this edition of Yummy Yummy. Well, why are we always following what you want? I'm taking charge. Join us next week when we do yummy yummy cheese scones. But it's got to be cheese scones

that everybody can get their hands on. Because that's the idea with yummy yummy, right? We eat it and then we give a thought.

We can do some kind of cracker next week for you if you want, if you're plain Jane. Plain Hayley Jane. Okay. Crackers next week. Play ZM's

Fletchborn andan and Haley. Need to talk at some stage soon about producer Jared who's given himself a nickname in the group chat. I think... A cool nickname he's given himself. Do we want to do this now? Do you want me to tell you about this benching or should we just get into this?

Well, I think we'll save it in five minutes. What's benching? This is the new dating term. They're saying it's the worst... I'd rather talk about the name in the group chat. It's the worst trend. We can do both. Okay, in one break.

We can do it all. No. Hang on, let me just see. Stay tuned. After the break, we'll discuss this. Okay, perfect. We will roast producer Jared. The move he has pulled over the weekend, unacceptable.

I'd say it's bold. It's audacious. It's bold, it's unacceptable, It's audacious. It is entitled. It is not on. Stay tuned. All right, I'm going to tell you about benching. So we talk a lot about these dating terms that are out there, ghosting, zombie, breadcrumbed, beige flag, morange flag,

this dude, dude, dilly quiet, quit, subtle, plop, all this. You can just make up any word and make it a dating term power courting power courting oh what's power courting when you take time away

from your relationship to let it completely drain out and then you recharge it by doing something exciting yeah really extravagant

wow they think it's over we've pitted it out but I'm power courcording it. Yeah, and then you come in with like an engagement ring. Yes! Oh, yeah.

You got power-corded. Yeah, you got power-corded. The battery was flat, now you're being power-corded. Yeah. Wouldn't you call that recharging? No. Power-corded.

Because it's more than a recharge. It's a lifeline. It's a yeah. I think my favourite dating term ever is submarining Where people just pop up And then they submerge And you never see them for six months

And then they just pop up again This is not dissimilar benching The common thing about All of these dating terms Is that it involves one person Treating the other person So disrespectfully. This is what I think.

So if you're going like, I'm quiet quitting someone, just be upfront. I'm ghosting someone. How dare you? Benching is exactly what you think it would be, right? Which is going, I'm not going to completely give you the flick, but I'm just going to put you on the bench for a little bit. Not that I want you to go away.

It's a little bit submarine-y. I'm bringing someone else to play. I'm bringing in someone else and I'm going to bench you for a bit, but I don't want you off the bench for a little bit. Not that I want you to go away. It's a little bit submarine-y. I'm bringing someone else to play. It's a little submarine-y. I'm bringing in someone else and I'm going to bench you for a bit, but I don't want you off the team. So it's a sports analogy. They're on the bench. Yeah. They're warming the bench. Yeah. Bench warmers. Yeah. Okay. You're supposed to do, it's like you like the person enough that you want to spend time with them when it suits you, but the rest of the time you want to spend time with and when it suits you but the rest of the time you want to put them on the bench and then if you you know want to bring them in to sub them in get them off the bench but they're there but you don't want them completely out of the out of the game so it's just you've got a few substitutes going i would say if you were benching a few

people just sort of protection was probably the name of the game, you know? Yeah. HPV, otherwise the whole team. Gonorrhea's having a real resurgence. A resurgence at the moment. It's hot right now. It's hot and titchy. It's hot with your pee. Yeah. So if you've got a few people on the bench, that's up to you. That's your prerogative.

But get the team checked out. Get the team. Take the whole team for a check. You need to get the team doctor in. Yeah. You don't want a Mamma Mia situation, you know, where you're benching three dudes and then you get pregnant. It could be any of them.

Or a deadly cocktail of all of them. Is that what happens in Mamma Mia? Never seen it. Yeah, she doesn't know which one's her dad. Yeah. Is it Colin Firth or Pierce Brosnan or Skarsgård? And is that why they're all singing? Yeah.

Yeah. Who's my dad? My mom had sex with all of y'all. Who's my dad? That's a very famous ABBA song. Yeah. Right. Did you know it?

No. You went inside of her. You left a little bit of yourself. I don't know that. Then you next went inside of her A power move from producer Jared in the group chat. Yeah, this happened over the weekend. We all got silly nicknames in the group chat. Yeah, so you've got Vaughan Smith, PhD.

Correct. We've got Carl Fletcher, Dunce. We've got Carmel McJones for Carween. Which is not Carlin's name at all. Chanelette Pajamas, PhD of Hot Parents. Yeah, Hot Parents. And H.Sprout, actress. Factual, that's factual.

Jared's was Jizzy P.Pest. Yeah, because that's his DJ name. It's his DJ name Jared's was Jizzy P. Pest Yeah because That's his DJ name That's his DJ name Jizzle Pizzle Jizzy P Jizzy P And then over the weekend

Jared decided He doesn't want to be called that For reasons unbeknown to us And so he changed his nickname In the group chat to Wolf Which is arguably way cooler Wolf Wolf

What the hell Nobody calls you Wolf Heaps of people cooler. Wolf. Wolf. What the hell? Nobody calls you Wolf. Who gave you the audacity? No, they don't. So many do. Jizzy P. Pest, no one calls you Wolf. Jizzy P. No one calls me Jizzy P. We do. I don't even know if you're

allowed to say that on the radio. It's your DJ name. There's Jazzy Jeff and there's Jizzy P. And also, it doesn't come up Jizzy P when you tag me and stuff.

It comes up as Jizzy and that gave me a hell of a fright and I said, absolutely not. Wipe that. Well, then you ask for a new nickname.

You don't give yourself a cool nickname. What are we going to do? I'm going to edit it. I've got to open. Jizzy? Well, he's got to pay for this audacity. Well, Vaughn has been raising wolves,

and I've been here for three years. I feel like I might qualify as a wolf now. As a wolf. No. This is just what I say to the producers when they're like, oh, Jono and Ben are taking their producers out for morning tea. I said, well, they're raising sheep. Weak sheep.

Yeah. They're shepherds to a bunch of weak little baby sheep. We are raising wolves. And then I howl and I make everybody howl. Yeah. And it saves me so much money in having to take these ungrateful shits out for morning tea. I'm just going to reiterate the name. Oh!

The name's changed. We're raising wolves. Next on the show. The name has changed. Jersey, raising wolves. Next on the show. The name has changed. Jersey, Jersey, Pessy Pess. And you have, that is for three months, sir. Yeah, you're not allowed to change that. Because we're raising wolves.

We teased this at the end of last week that we'd had a stroke of genius and it sparked the idea for a new cocktail. Now, we love Turkish Delight. Big fan. Fletch and I. You're not so much, Vorni. It's my lowest favourite. Even under Boost or Or morrow.

Yeah, I like a morrow. But you'd rather have... I like a morrow. What's not to like about a morrow? Turkish delight. A bit of caramel. A bit of chocolate. A morrow.

A bit of that other stuff. Might as well have a Mars bar. But it is... I'll have one of those too. Turkish delight and ripes, cherry ripes, are the most divisive in a favourites box. Yes, for sure. For sure.

And I love a Turkish delight. And then we were talking about it and the idea came that we would make a cocktail based on Turkish Delight, on the sort of Cadbury Turkish Delight, which has chocolate as opposed to your traditional Turkish Delight. Turkish Turkish Delight.

And good morning to our Turkish listeners, however prepared to be offended. We've got to say Turkia now, don't we? Turkia. Turkia. Yeah. Anyway, so and then Vaughan suggested that we could make this a whole series of cocktails where we take a Cadbury favourite

and we turn it into a cocktail. Challenge accepted. Work out how to do it. Challenge accepted. So Friday we were welcomed warmly to the new abode of TVNZ Breakfast's Maddie McLean and his husband Ryan. And we got the ingredients together, didn't we? Gays can own homes now.

Did you know this? Yeah, they can do all sorts. It's great. It's so great. I think it's a step in the right direction. I don't know about this. Who's going to own homes next? Dogs?

Yeah, dogs. Well, if you marry them, if you marry a dog, you should be able to buy a house with it. Anyway. Each to their own. Each to their own. Each to their own. It was lovely. Far be it from me.

Oh. It was pretty, I was like, I'm going to take my shoes off. You should always take your shoes off. Nah, not always. Always take your shoes off. They've got hardwood floors, it wasn't clear. You don't have to take your shoes off. No, always take them off.

They said it, but they both had bare feet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I was like, I'm taking my shoes off. As a rule, take your shoes off and make your kids take their shoes off. Teach them to take their shoes off everywhere they go. Nothing worse than a kid flinging the door open in your house and just running in with shoes on. Or, great problem to fix that, don't have kids.

Oh, I like that one. Other people have kids, though. I'll go with that one. Now, here's a silly little poll idea. When you take your shoes off, do you also remove your socks? Because I... No, no, no. Socks, leave your socks on.

What are you talking about? No, but they had hard wooden floors. But then you're skidding on their floor. I was skidding around. And I do notice halfway through the evening, I was like, I have to remove my socks. I was slip sliding away. That's fine.

They give it a bit of a skirt skirt when you go around the corner. No, no, no, no. And the more I drunk, the more the socks had to come off. So I got to keep a grip on the ground. Gotcha. Anyway, so we'd ordered a rose syrup. I'd found the clear. That's the flavor of like the Turkish delight.

And then we'd found a clear creme de cacao. Which is the chocolate flavor. Chocolate flavor. And then we thought gin was the base because it's got a nice sort of herbaceousness. And then that was sort of our thing. We had some ideas for the design and whatnot. And then we made the presentation we talked about the other day. Did you do a rim?

We didn't. Just time. We did it because of time and we were also making on bulk. But I'll give you the recipe so you can try it. But there were a few things that kind of went. A bit of trial and error. A bit of trial and error A bit of trial and error The rose was very strong

to start, so we were like, oh we need more of this, so we're playing around and then we got it perfect but we'd added and subtracted so much that we didn't have the recipe so we had to start again Then the other problem was Hayley at one point just free poured I was like, now we're never going to know how this is going to work

This is the syrup that would make up to 10 litres. Yes. Or the 10 litres made from the syrup. Did you pour more chocolate in? We're using concentrate. We had to start again. We had to start again. Then I also realised that the rose syrup we had bought was clear,

so it wasn't going to be pink. So luckily I'd found a natural pink food colouring in my pantry and brought that with me. But then they had quite porous bench tops and I was very nervous the whole time I was going to stain it. So that had to sit in the sink and I was wearing a white shirt. So that was a bit of a disaster for a while. And then Maddie,

host of the house, tipped over a whole Aperol spritz and it smashed a glass on the floor on the bench. So we had to start again because the glass went in. Oh jeez. again because it was glass everywhere. Oh, jeez. And then, yeah, at one point I put in too much chocolate

because old Fletch over here said it needs more and I put in more and he said, not that much and he wasn't clear. Turns out, well, you did do about a shot and a half free pour. Yeah, I did. Anyway. Why? And we kept tasting it.

It sounds like nothing but a disaster. Well, we kept tasting it and we were like, more or less. We were doing it. We had the straw dip in and everyone was like, it needs a bit of this. But then we got there, didn't we? And then we landed on it.

So here is the recipe for Fletch and Hayley's Turkish Delight Cadbury Favourites Cocktail. And this is good because a lot of people, when we posted this, asked for the recipe. Yes, they did. Now, I posted it, but we'll post it again. I'll do it in parts. Okay.

Two parts gin Two parts gin. Plain gin. One part clear creme de cacao. Half a part rose syrup. A shot of aquafaba or chickpea juice.

If you don't want to use that because that just makes froth. It's vegan egg white basically. Chickpea juice? So you take that out of the can. Yeah. Well, you can use that. I'm emotional about chickpeas. And then, No, you shake it in the cocktail shaker.

And it makes the froth. With all the stuff in it. With all the stuff. It's amazing. What flavour does chickpea juice have? Nothing. You know when you have an egg white cocktail and you can get a little sulphury?

It's still the froth, but it's no eggy. And it's in with everything else. So all of what you're saying so far has just been put into a shaker. No, there's no different stages. It all goes into the shaker. A lot of ice. Couple of drops. Couple of drops of pink food colouring. We prefer our natural. Lit on.

Shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake. Then you get your little cocktail glass and you pour it in and it'll have a frothy top. Then you take a Cadbury flake and you put a little dollop in the middle of Cadbury flake. And then you take a small Turkish Delight and you cut a little corner and you put it on the rim. Beautiful. There it is.

And it was good. It was so good. They were so good. Even people that don't like Turkish Delight were like, I love this. You couldn't have. There was two in our group that that don't like Turkish Delights. I love this. You couldn't have. There was two in our group that really didn't like Turkish Delight. Manny McLean included. And we kept coming back for more.

Right. How sweet. You couldn't spend all night drinking them. You have one or two. Well, we all ended up having about three of them. And that was enough. But that was throughout the whole evening. We'd take a break and go back to something simpler.

Right. They were so classy as well. They were really sweet but they didn't taste like a kid's, you know, mocktail. The gin was poppin'. It was a success and I think next we're gonna have to do Crunchy Bar.

We're gonna do the Crunchy Bar. When we have our next schedule blow out. Honeycomb. Honeycomb chocolate again. I think we need a creamy based, maybe more like a... And we're not doing Morrow over my dead body. Oh, I'd say no.

What's not to love about Morrow? No, it's not happening. It doesn't have any nuts. Caramel. No. It doesn't have any nuts. You can do that at one of your parties.

I don't have parties. I happily sit at home while you're at a party and eat Morrow's and drink straight booze though. I'm just mixing my mouth like this. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, there's great news for people that are allergic to cats.

Madeline Sami. Friend. Famously allergic to cats. Famous. She is very allergic to cats. Does she have a cat though? She doesn't have a cat. When she comes over to my house though, she has to take a lot of pills.

Why would you have a cat if you were allergic to cats? Because they bring joy into your life. Oh my God, cut his mic off. Cut his balls off. I've had enough of this guy. This is what I wanted to talk about because doctors, a new study has been published in the Journal of Allergy and Clinical Immunology.

Immunology. Smart. Immunology Clinical Immunology. Immunology. Smart. Immunology. Immunology. Immunology. About how they've got a new method that they're trialling, which would mean that... You keep your cats in a plastic bag.

Vaughan! Hey, I have a plastic bag, Kat. Don't you, dear? No, they're combining treatments, which looks promising for people with cat allergies. So you could then, they're saying, have a cat. But they also go on to talk about how people have cats already, but they're allergic to them. That's silly.

You're being silly. Isn't that wild? No, but just because you're allergic to something doesn't mean you don't like it. Aaron can't eat power, but he thinks about it all the time. Yeah, but there's no power on the beard. You're not patting your power as it's purring on your lap. He might, though, but he can't. Well, if he's at home patting his power.

I'm on time after the show today to pat the power. But there are people that love cats or dogs so much that they will have them even if it means they're sniffly and they're sneezing. And they're itchy. Isn't that wild? They are silly. If I developed an allergy to cats, I'm never, ever, ever going to live a moment without a cat.

I know. I think I'd be the same. When the day comes in 20 years and it's Rolly's time, he'll be 27 at this point. Oh, yeah. He's very old. He'll be the Guinness World Records oldest cat. I will literally take him to the crematorium

and on the way home from it, I will go to a rescue place and get a new one. Straight away. I can't survive without. You need a cat. How long did you wait since, I'm sorry, your cat passed until Major Mars came in? I think it was like two years.

Two years? I wasn't going to get another one. But then your heart had a hole in it. But then it was like lockdown. I was like, oh, cat would be kind of cool. And then I was like, yeah. He's the best. And now I can't go away for weekends unless I find someone to feed him. It's a pain in the ass.

Because he doesn't do catteries, does he? Yeah. He's a bit posh for it. He's a bit posh for that. But I thought, could we take some calls now? Is there anybody listening that is allergic to their pet but just puts up with it? Because pets rule. Can you be allergic to dogs?

Surely. Yep, yep. It's anything with like dander, right? Yeah, there are hypoallergenic. Dogs, yeah, our dogs don't. Well, we've got a retriever who molts like nobody's business. Sometimes Shadow will jump in my car and be like, whose blonde hair is this?

I'll be like, the golden retrievers. Which is great because the guy I'm having an affair with has short blonde hair. I was be like, the golden retrievers. Which is great because the guy I'm having an affair with has short blonde hair. I was going to say. And I really rough him up when we're in the car. But our other dogs are a mix. So they don't drop hair. But it means they get knots. But hair's not

always the issue. It's the oil, eh? Because everyone was saying, you know, the hair-free cats. Not for me. Yuck, yeah. Why wouldn't you just get that if you were allergic? But it's not always the issue. It's the oil, eh? Because everyone was saying, you know, the hair-free cats. Yeah. Not for me. Boo, yuck, yeah. Why wouldn't you just get that if you were allergic? But it's not the fur all the time. Sometimes it's the oils that they secrete.

And they lick themselves and sometimes it's what they... Right. It's the saliva as well, right? Okay, well, 0800DARLS.N. We want you to give us a call now. Text through 9696. Are you allergic to your pets? But you just...

Put up with it. Put up. Because... Give us a call. Well, as scientists work on ways to make your cat less allergic, or you less allergic to your cat... Yes. We are asking the question this morning,

are you allergic to your pet? And despite that, you still have it. Turns out lots of you. Yeah, isn't this like crazy? Well, they just bring such sunshine and joy to all of our lives, eh, Vaughan? No. He's not a fan. Stevie,

are you allergic to your kitten? Hi, yes. Quite allergic. No, what happens? I just, I kind of get really bad hay fever and like come up and welch. Yeah, whenever I play with her. Wait, so how often do you play with your kitten then?

Every day. How long have you had this kitten and had you had no previous cats? I haven't had a cat before, but my friend found her abandoned, so I couldn't say no. What are you going to do, close the door on her? Yeah.

So every day you'll be allergic to this cat and it's not putting you off? No, I mean, she's just so crazy and fun and I just take antihistamines and stuff and yeah. Oh my God. What's your cat's name? Tilly. Silly Tilly! I will read

you this text while you're on the phone Stevie. I'm a dental hygienist and we had a patient on the road for their appointment who was going into anaphylactic shock because of her cat. They'd been reacting for years because they were allergic to it but today was the day that her body had had enough she was just very lucky to be going to her dental appointment as we were allergic to it. But today was the day that her body had had enough. She was just very lucky to be going

to her dental appointment as we were able to administer adrenaline. Oh, wow. What? Well, Stevie, you could just go buy like an EpiPen and just make sure you've got that on. Oh, yeah. I knew it all time. Yeah, you'll be alright. Silly Tilly. That's like how much

people love cats. Paige, are you allergic to cats? Yes, I am, unfortunately. And so do you have a cat? I have two of them. Yeah, double it up. And they're very clingy. Okay, are you allergic to anything else, like dogs as well?

I'm actually allergic to cows, and I live on a dairy farm. Wait, you can be allergic to cows? Apparently, yeah. She's got a death wish. Wait, you can be allergic to cows? Apparently, yeah. She's got a death wish. So what happens when you go near a cow or a cat? I get, yeah, similar to the last person, get really bad hay fever and, like, quite itchy.

And, like, if I'm milking, I get real itchy arms and, like, break out rash and stuff. Oh, my God. And that still doesn't put you off like playing with the cats? No, apparently not. Or the cows. Or the cows. Just a bit of an idiot, yeah. Oh my God.

A bit of an idiot. Seems to be the general theme. So many messages coming in, people putting up with it. Talking about people that are allergic to their own pets. It is wild that people will put up with... I've just been looking up long term effects

of antihistamine use because lots of people are saying they just take antihistamines every day Long term use of some antihistamines may increase your risk of dementia So is that worth it? Yeah but then at least you'll meet your cat every day It'll be like new

It eats its dry biscuits You get a new cat every day Oh my god look at this cute cat. It's mine. Oh, my God, it's responding so well to me. Come sit on my lap. It must really like me. Yeah.

So are you allergic to your own pet Byron? Good morning. Morning. How's it going? Good. This is the wife's cat. Yes. My wife has always had a cat,

and I've always been allergic to cats since growing up. Yep. And I've since got over the allergy. Oh, you've done that exposure thing, where your exposure to the allergy ends up not killing you, but you kind of become immune to it. It doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger. It does take about 10 years, and I used to live on antihistamines.

10 years? Right. And you did this antihistamines. 10 years? Right. And you did this for love, really, didn't you? That's it. I loved her, and she loved the cat. Aw, see, that's nice. Byron, thanks for your call. Heidi, you're allergic to cats?

Yes, I am. How many cats do you have? At the moment, I have two, but a few years ago one of my cats had kittens so I had nine. Oh wow, was that a horrible time for you? As much as that was cute? Yeah, what do you mean? Surrounded by little kittens?

Although I ended up needing an inhaler because I couldn't breathe. Yeah, dude. You had to go to a hospital. These cats were literally killing you and you're like, cute, I've got nine cats. They cuddle me. It's great. Yeah.

I mean, yeah, that's cute as all hell, but I mean, you couldn't breathe, Heidi. You couldn't breathe. No. No, I didn't. Do we know if we need breath to live? That's one I've known. I checked. We did.

Yeah, you do. You know how, like, water, what is it, three days? You can go without water and then you die. Breathing, it's a few minutes. Breathing's way less. How many days?

Two. One, I heard. Hold your breath for a day. You start getting a bit kooky. Some messages in. Someone said, our cat is a dribbler and we learned

that the main allergen for cats is in their saliva. That's why they lick it. Is it? It's a whole lot worse. And we learned that the main allergen for cats is in their saliva. That's why they lick it. Is it? It gets a whole lot worse, yeah. Fel D1. And so when it dribbled on us, we'd have reactions.

God, how slobbery is your cat? Must be a dribbly cat. You know when cats get a little bit dribbly? Yeah, every now and then they get a little wet lip. When they get older, they get dribbly. Older, they get dribbly. It's kind of cute. Almost a constant drip.

Privilege of growing old. Yeah. A few people have said there is a food for their cats that's made them slightly more tolerable. Yeah, I heard of this. The cat eats it and becomes less allergenic. Yeah, so now you're dosing up your cat for something that is not done at all.

Yeah, but other people still feed them, you know, minced God knows what. An immunologist has me on four antihistamines a day and allergy injections because my cat's alive. Oh, wow. Okay. Just you guys talking about cats made me sneeze while I'm driving. Oh, wow. That's how allergic I am to cats.

We better stop saying it. Cat, cat, cat, cat. Oh, no, don't. No, no, that's it. Choo, choo, choo, choo At the weekend I went to a first birthday party Haven't been to a first birthday party for a little while Way more for the parents and the grandparents

And the adults that have been around them The kid themselves They probably take a nap halfway through their party But doesn't that sound like a great idea? What do they look like? What does a one-year-old look like? One-year-old kid. Like a baby, but not a baby baby,

but the size of a rugby ball. Are they a baby? Are they walking yet? Some babies walk at one. Some babies don't walk at one. Oh, yeah. Some do, some don't. Why don't you Google out of interest?

Why don't you Google to see what an average one-year-old baby looks like? One-year-old kid. Right. They've got baby faces. Loud. They've got baby faces. No. Are they loud?

No, no, no, no. Are they loud? No. Well, some are, but not this particular baby. Cute. There's some cute babies. There's a very cute baby. But anyway, I was in charge.

I was left in charge of buying the gift. So that's what these parties are for. They're getting gifts. Yeah, help us out a bit. Because this baby doesn't know. You can probably get away with buying, without buying a kid something for like, what, four years? Well, that was my mate Johnny's idea.

He said, let's just arrive and find his favourite toy and put it in a box and wrap it up. Because then he'd go and wrap it. And he was like, what a surprise. My favourite toy's here. Great idea. Which is a great idea for a one-year-old. But I said to Shaday, I'm going to buy him a dump truck. and it was like, what a surprise, my favourite toys here. Great idea. Which is a great idea for a one-year-old.

But I said to Sade, I'm going to buy him a dump truck, a yellow dump truck, and that was the main plan. Yeah. But then I saw a yellow bulldozer. I was like, well, if you're going to start a bloody earthworks and company with a dump truck, you've got to have a bulldozer. You've got to be able to move some earth. If there'd been a digger, I would have bought one of those as well, but I didn't see it.

Really forcing some gender stereotypes on this kid. Well, that's what August said to me. My daughter said we should get him a Barbie. Oh, yeah, okay. To go in the dump truck. To drive the dump truck. What a woman. I mean, she probably needs to get on a...

Driving a truck. She probably needs to chuck on a pair of work boots, though, because those heels she was wearing weren't... Those stilettos won't do it. That's an osh. You won't be allowed in the yard with those heels. You'll sink. All those long sort of three-meter legs,

how are they going to fold up and fit into a dump truck? Yeah, that's true. Sorry, Barbie, but... You're just not the right dimensions. Stick to being a vet. Yeah, a vet or a doctor or a tennis player. So I bought the yellow dump truck, and Shadow's like, he's a one-year-old. Everyone's going to be giving him dump trucks.

He's probably got four dump trucks. Also, how much is a dump truck? Nah, it wasn't much. It was a little tiny. It's not a good one. It was like $25. Not like a ton. $25?

Yeah. For a yellow dump truck. For a one-year-old. Go to the $2 shop or the one to look sharp. Go to one of those stores. They don't have dump trucks. Just junk. They've got silly toys.

They don't have dump trucks. I've never seen dump trucks They've got silly toys. They don't have dump trucks. I've never seen dump trucks in my time. I'm not buying a one-year-old a wig. Candles and whatnot. Buy them a paint supplies. An adult's Italian plumber costume, which I'm just still wondering how they've got to run Nintendo on that one. Because that is Mario, my friends.

$25. What is it for? What is it worth with $25 for a dump truck? Because it's one. It doesn't know what's happening. It wasn't metal. It wasn't a metal dump truck. Plastic.

They're harder to find. You know, those Tonkers that we had, they lasted forever, but they were also pretty crazy dangerous. Why are you buying a one-year-old a metal toy? No, no, I bought him a plastic toy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I bought him a plastic toy. It should be rubber.

Anyway, they said it's present time and he started opening them, and so I just got straight in there. I was like, open this one now, mate. Oh, I'll give you a hand. Well, you can one now, mate. Oh, I'll give you a hand. Well, you can't understand who he's one. I'll give you a hand. He's looking at me.

He's smiling. He's looking at me. He knows. He's like, here he is. Oh, big dogs come to town with those presents. This will be good, he's saying. This will be good.

I look forward to this. Open it up, dump truck. He was like, his eyes lit up. I was like, let's get that out of the box. They're hard to get out of the box. Oh, those little tabs.

Cable tied in or like this string that you're like, oh, that looks like weak strings. It's not. Kevlar reinforced string. You've got to get the sharpest knife to get through that. And yeah, I felt bad for everybody else, you know,

because he opened the best present early in the game and then everybody else's present sort of was like, wow, pales in comparison. Oh, no. What kind of junk do people get? Oh, books. Boring. He's not a nerd. He can't even read. He's not a do people get? Oh, books. Boring. He's not a nerd.

He can't even read. He's not a nerd. He wants to start an Earthworks business. We've got to get him ahead of the game. No, he got some good presents. There was one that he opened, and it was like this cement mixer, but it sung songs and popped balls out. I was like, oh, that's better.

That can help at the yard. Yeah, but that's better than a dump truck. I was like, uh-oh's better than a dump truck. I was like, uh-oh. We've got a contender for best present. And he pushed the button and it sung a song. And then he put it down and he went back to the other dump truck. And then I kept giving him the dump truck.

Being like, mate, forget about that. Forcing the present on him. Yeah, right. So did you win? Yep. Okay. What did Sade have to say? Oh, I. Right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So did you win? Yep. Okay. What did Sade have to say? Oh, I let her definitely let her know. Yeah.

Because she was against the dump truck. She thought books, but a lot of people got books, and that's good because you want books. But how many books? They can't hear or understand you. Do they still do the books? Do they have the books with the flaps? Yeah.

Those are so good. Flaps books have stepped up Have they? Since we were kids He got this book And it was like A game of memory And the Flaps slid So they weren't Flaps

They were like sliding doors But he's a baby Yeah, but he'll get there eventually Right So what's behind For the second birthday When you actually use it It's very hard to buy

You're like that And when you're buying presents You're like that seems Fit for a one-year-old and it's like three plus. I never know. I never know. I'm like, do I buy him a rattle? Is he past rattles?

One of his favourite toys is two, remember AG preserving jars? Yeah. With the green screw on lids. You'd put the seal on and then you'd put the additional, two of those tied together with some string. Oh, it's like having a cat. You know, like you spend all the money on theids, you'd put the seal on and then you'd put the additional, two of those tied together with some string. Oh, it's like having a cat. You know, like

you spend all the money on the door and it's clink, clink, clink, clink, clink. Yeah, and then all the cat wants to do is play in a box. Yeah, yeah, totally. Okay, cool. Yeah. Boxes are pretty great though. When was the last time you climbed inside one? They're still pretty cool in there. Yeah. If you get a big one. Make a rocket ship, I guess. Yeah, well, I tell you what, that's the best part about it.

It can be anything. Imagination. It can be a rocket that's the best part about it. It can be anything. Imagination. It can be a rocket ship. It could be a submarine. It could be a cardboard box. It could be a coffin. You could be in a shallow grave. Oh, yeah, you could be a vampire.

Oh, yeah, come out and kill people. Well, well done on doing so well, buying a one-year-old a gift. Great. Then I got to send a video yesterday, and he was playing with the dump truck. I was like, confirmed. Day two, confirmed favourite. Best present,

you won. Best present, I won. My wife was wrong, I was right. Probably the favourite. It just all came up smooth. Good day for you.

Great. It really came up smooth. Great. Here is a feature that iPhone has had for a while now But people are just clocking on to it basically Now you could do this for an ex

Or you could do this with someone you're no longer friends with Or someone you just don't want to think about as often Because you know how on iPhones they do the memories So this is in your camera It's weird because it can be like Dining this weekend If you took photos when you were out And it be like dining this weekend. If you took photos when you were out. And it's like dining this weekend and it puts it on and puts a little jingly number in the background.

Or it might be like memories with the great outdoors. Yeah. And it's every time you've ever been outside. Yeah, it just puts together a little thing, doesn't it? But I notice as well it selects people. Like there'll be like Vaughan and there'll just be photos of Vaughn in my camera roll. By the water with Indy is one of mine. And it's every time I've had a photo of my daughter with water also in it.

Oh, gorgeous. So it knows, right? Like. It knows things. It knows. Yeah, it does. See, I've got a Madeline Sami slideshow on my phone. Feathered friends.

It identifies the chickens. Yeah, the furry friends it does for the cat as well You take a lot of photos Yeah because I have a lot of cat photos You have a lot of chicken photos Chickens are very photogenic creatures It's the big eyes Yeah if you don't like chickens they freak you out

But they're always like doing some weird pose And they look like they're about to tell you something really philosophical Like Think of others before yourself for a change I love the memories Anyway so here's one that they do So you can go on right think of others before yourself for a change. I love the memories. Anyway, so here's one that they do. So you can go on, right?

So say I've broken up with someone and I don't want to look at them anymore. I don't want them popping up in my memories. You go albums. This is on your iPhone. Then you'd scroll down a bit to where it says people. And you know how it can identify certain people that you might have a lot of? Yes.

So I could go down right and here you go, here's Fletch in my photo so I'll tap him. And that's every, oh god we've got some photos. Look at your guns in the summer! Should we upload that? What?

He's just doing his thumbs up, I can almost see Daniel shorts as well, that's a perfect photo. It's going up. Anyway, so then, right, so say I've done Fletch. We've had a terrible breakup. I don't want to see his face anymore. He hurt me. And I will never unhurt from this.

See, you did give me a pass card, but then apparently not. No one cashes it in, not even me. And I had the opportunity. Now, next to this person is a dot, dot, dot. So go dot, dot, dot. And you can scroll down and then you go feature this person less so you would be less featured

or I can totally unsee any photos from you. And it will hide them from your camera roll. Gone. Wow, okay. But you're not deleting the photos in case you want to come back. To me, if you've broken up with someone and you don't want to see them in your camera roll,

just go through and delete all the photos. I couldn't. I've been with Aaron for 12 years. It would be tens of thousands of photos probably. Yeah, true. Yeah, what am I going to do that? No. Also, sometimes, you know, it's nice to look back

and sort of either go, gosh, go me for tapping dat. Yeah. Or, you know, look how far I've come. Look how far I've come. Yeah. Yeah. So that's how you do it. You just tap on the face.

You scroll down on the triple dots and you can no longer see that person. Now, I'm having a look at all the faces that's identified, some strange ones. I mean, Paul Ego's got his own album. You know? He's a great man, but not someone you've spent an insane amount of time with. No, no, no, no, no. Who else have I got?

I got a presentation the other day. It was like Hayley through the years. And it was just because we all had to take our own promo photos on Have You Been Pregnant? I've had Vaughn through the years. It's really weird. You're like, oh, cool. And then there's some like close-, and yeah, it was like,

hmm. How has it identified this baby? How does it identify this baby's face? It's nuts. It's crazy how they can. I don't have a few photos of that baby, though. Okay. Well, there you go. If you want to ever remove them, there's someone I've slept with. They've got an album. Yeah, but they're hot. I don't want to get rid

of that. Keep it in there No we'll keep it in there How long How many photos Do you have on your camera roll I hate having This is where you This is

You've deleted You clear yours out Yeah cause I I just dump my photos off I hate having 49,000 49,000 photos and videos In my album

Yeah I've got In my like 57,000 How much of that Is just crap Oh lots of it The majority of it Yeah

But some of them are hotties And I never want to forget You've got to imagine But imagine if you did keep all the photos Of the people you'd slept with Jeez iCloud storage much? He'd need a few phones

Yeah 16.99 a month for the clouds Much? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley Fact of the day Day, day, day, day, day Today's fact of the day is about Singapore Which is the anglicization of the Malay name Singapura,

which is derived from the Sanskrit word meaning lion city. Oh. Okay. I love Singapore. Singapura. We stopped over there, eh? Yeah. Flying in was nuts.

You fly in and all of a sudden there's just this city that takes up this whole space. I know. And like hundreds and hundreds of freight ships there's just this city that takes up this whole space. I know. And like hundreds and hundreds of freight ships just chilling in the ocean. It's a real fun city. Like you can go and have a lot of fun there. The airport.

It's very clean. It didn't strike me as like a, I don't know. It looked a bit boring. No, no, no, no. You said a bit sterile. A bit sterile. It was like really clean. I You said a bit sterile. A bit sterile. A bit clean, but sterile. It was like really clean and a bit... I quite like a clean city myself. I know.

I do love a dirty city. That's really fun to get into. Like I love a hustle bustle city. It's bustling. It's bustling. I reckon if you got caught short in Singapore and you needed to use a public toilet like I did on Friday in downtown Auckland, you wouldn't... Dude.

Dude. What do you do? Oh, my God. I was like, Vaughan, do not go there. I was like, I am stuck. Fletch and I parted ways. I was going to a shop and he was going home. And he's like, I better get a scooter.

And I said, why is that? And he's like, I'm, he didn't say turtle hidden, but like I'm about to ship a pack. Mama's crowning. Well, you know why? Because we just had lunch together and we had two. And bottomless coffees. Yeah, bottomless coffee.

And yeah, and I literally just got home like with a second to spare. I laughed at him when he went his way and jumped on a scooter. I said, I've got one brewing but it's going to be an hour. And then it was not an hour. And I came out of a shop and I literally opened up Google Maps. The toilet's near me. I said, get to the shop and I literally opened up Google Maps, toilets near me. I said, get to the mall. I said, Vaughn, get to the mall.

It's the best, the cleanest. Go to an Arnold's. No way. I wasn't close. So I Googled toilets near me and there was one at the road. I was like, what? There's a toilet on High Street? High Street, central Auckland, if you're familiar with it. Yeah.

Underneath the car park building. There is, but there isn't. I know. So I'm like, hello? Oh, gosh. As I sit around a corner, and there's two doors. And one says closed, and underneath it, in block capitals, someone had written blocked. So the toilet's blocked.

Oh, no. And you can't be putting in what you're putting down. I'm like, uh-oh. So I go in there, and I'm like, uh-oh. So I go in there and I'm like immediately just, it just closes off. It just, my anus is just like, we shan't. We're better than this. Yeah.

You have a family. My colon and my bowel are like, this thing's got to go. It is not. I sent a video to Auckland Councillor Richard Hills and I said, I know you and Wayne Brown are about to go to a climate change meeting. I don't know if this is to convince Wayne Brown it's actually a thing or not. I don't know. But I said

something needs to be done about these lavatories. It's one of those public toilets that doesn't have a toilet seat. It's like stainless steel. Oh, the stainless steel bowl. You hover. Was there toilet paper? Because I feel like you would have needed it. It was super thin and there wasn't much left

and it was kind of damp. Oh, I know. You know when there's this like dampness of the toilet paper and you're like, is this dampness going to affect its integrity? Yes. I feel so bad for women because, you know, you have to sit down. Whereas most of the time we can use a public toilet stand. No, I'll always hover.

Hover and spray. I'll always hover. Hover and spray. Spray and walk away. Spray and walk away, yeah. But anyway, stand up. No, I'll always hover. Hover and spray. I'll always hover. Hover and spray. Spray and walk away. Spray and walk away, yeah. But anyway, it happened. Oh my. I don't think it would have happened in Singapore.

No, because it's very clean. Very clean. Great public transport too. The train was amazing in Singapore. There's Universal Studios there. Is there? Yeah, you're on the boat. I think I need to check it out more before I judge it.

Yeah, you should. It's a really fun sitting. Well, here's today's fact of the day about Singapore. Okay. If you have a seniors card, like a gold card here in Aotearoa, New Zealand, and when you get to a pedestrian crossing, you scan your card,

and the green man lasts 13 seconds longer. Oh, my God. That's so annoying. You can have an elderly card. It's called a CPAS compliant senior citizen concession card or a PWD card, which is a person with disabilities card. And when you press the button, you don't even actually need to press the button.

You scan your card. It recognises somebody's there that needs a little bit longer to cross. And it gives you a longer green man to cross the street. Sometimes you see an elderly person, you're like, man to cross the street. Sometimes you see an elderly person and you're like, oh, I don't know if you're going to make this.

And you don't want them hurrying. Put a hand behind their back and give them a little hustle off. You don't want them hurrying and hitting the curb and going to mischief. No, old people.

Isn't that a great idea? Some of the crossings are like 30 seconds. Is that enough time to hobble across? Well, it depends though. Singapore is pretty big as well. They've got big wide streets. Well, if it's 30 seconds it depends, though. Singapore is pretty big as well. They've got big, wide streets.

Well, if it's 30 seconds, it'll give them an extra 13 to get across there. And some people are real shufflers. Yeah. You'd need your card and a lanyard the whole time if you're going to walk. I can back myself with four seconds to go at a crossing. Oh, you do all the time. I'm a fast walker. Me and Vaughn will be pulling back to go,

okay, well, it's not our turn. You'll be like, no, we can do it. Yeah, we've got to get there. Straight across. We've got to get to brunch, don, well, it's not our turn. You'll be like, no, we can do it. Yeah, we've got to get there. We've got to get to brunch. Stressful though. Got to get a brunch and then got to nearly put ourselves in Central Auckland. Give that toilet a wide berth. Oh yeah, we'll give

every public toilet a wide berth. Yeah. That one, especially. I've got the word there'll be allocation in the next Auckland budget to take care of. You're an influencer. It's embarrassing. We're putting all this work into this public transport system, which is going to be fantastic. More people than ever coming into the city

means more people ever caught short. It means more people ever are going to open up their phones and Google toilets near me, and more people than ever are going to be pointed in the direction of that heroin den. There was definitely some heroin in there. There was a lot of stuff going on. We're just lucky you're here today.

Aye, you're so lucky you made it out alive. I feel lucky. Damn lucky. So today's fact of the day is in Singapore, if you're a senior or a person with a disability, you can swipe your card at pedestrian crossings and it will allocate you extra time to cross. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yes. But we were trying to work out, he was kind of like early internet hero?

Yeah, like meme-wise, it was all internet jokes, like Chuck Norris this, and then, yeah, he is, he's quite right-wing, and yeah. Well, should we park that to the side, in interest to bring a story to light? He has recently discovered he has a love child who was 26 years old. Now she made herself known to him

and Can you give me her age again? 26. He's 83. Is he? You're going to have to do the calculator for this aren't you? Because this is like the plot of a TV show or a song.

Yeah, so he had an affair during his marriage in 2004, I believe. Okay, he's 57. Which resulted in a love child. Oh, he cheated out, oh, forever. There'll be heaps of them out there. That body was banging from the bow flex. Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry Sorry

The affair was in 2004 Which resulted in a love child And then she reached out Oh no this is confusing She's older now, he's had two of them There's one from 2004, there's one from 1991 Oh right So he's a naughty boy He's got two of them. There's one from 2004. There's one from 1991. Oh, right. So he's a naughty boy.

So he's got two love children. He's a naughty boy. It's often those outspoken, conservative, the strength of family, Christian types that end up having a high profile whoopsie, don't they? Sometimes it's in an airport toilet with a call boy. Sometimes. But in this case, it's just a few love child

as a result of an extramarital affair. The marriage that you'll remember is so sacred to them that they don't believe homosexuals should be able to do it. Yeah. Well, they've come forward and then he said he saw her, you know, they broke down in tears and they're reunited and he's happy as Chuck Norris. So the recent one he's only just found out about. Yeah.

Oh, wow. He's in trouble again. Double jeopardy. Yeah. I always think this is really juicy, the illegitimate children that, you know, you might not know of. I want to know if you are a love child.

Maybe you know that you are the product of, you know, a sailor pulled up on shore and... Well, what about, like, finding out from, like, one of those ancestry sites? That your dad's not your dad. Oh, yeah, that someone's not... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you hear of that happening as well.

Well, we've got a Portuguese sailor in our Maori bloodline somewhere who's tainted ever so much. Someone stopped in at Russell. Yeah, for a little bit of a Russell between the sheets. Someone had a little Russell between the sheets, indeed, with a beautiful Ngapuhi woman up north. So,

I'm a bit Portuguese. Wow. And Hawaiian, let's not forget. And a little bit Hawaiian, don't forget that, yeah. So I want to know, maybe you're a love child and you've always known it or you discovered it later and your father's not your father or your mother's not your mother. Also, it's not love.

I mean, that makes you feel better about being a love child, but you're probably like a lust child or a drunk child. Yeah. One night child, yeah. Okay, well, 0800-DAN DALZEDM is our number. Give us a call if you're a love child. Bonus points as well if you are the love child of one of your parents and a celebrity. Oh yeah, that's extra bonus points there.

Play ZM's Fletchford and Ailey. Play ZM. We want to know if you are a love child of some hot, steamy fling that ever happened. Your jaw's just dropped the floor. There are some wild stories coming through. Oh my gosh! Well, let's go to Anonymous first. Anonymous, good morning. Are you a love child?

Yes, I am. Okay. Who, between, where was the love? Who did it happen? So, my mum was the babysitter and slept with her husband. I've seen little documentaries where this happens. Yeah, they do. Little short 15-minute ones.

Little short 15. Sometimes you get a nine-minute highlight package. But I did not think this actually happened. In real life? Yeah, it does. Wait, so how often was your mum babysitting his kids? Every weekend. Oh, wow.

And did you grow up knowing this? I found out a few years later and sort of approached him and he was like, yeah, okay, that did happen, but I don't want nothing to do with you. Yeah, well, he doesn't deserve you. Yeah, and you're like, well, I don't care. Give me lots of money because I'm entitled to it. Yeah.

I'll see you when you die for my car. Yes! I will see the faces of your shocked children and wife when you're dead and I'm after my slice of the pie. Anonymous, thank you. Keep your texts coming in. 9696 0800 DARS at M. Are you a love child? I can't wait slice of the pie. Anonymous, thank you. Keep your texts coming in. 9696. 0800.

Dials at M. Are you a love child? I can't wait to talk to AD. We want to know this morning if you are a love child. These messages are insane. Some of them I don't even know if we can say. Because they involve some names. I love it.

My mum was married with two boys, then had an affair with a man who she used to see on his bicycle while dropping her boys off at kindy. She had a one-off quickie with bicycle man. Nine months later, I was born and looked nothing like her husband. Mum had... She was bicurious. Wait, was he a postie?

Or just a cycle enthusiast? All we know is he was on two wheels. And mum was like, I like that. Yeah. How does that happen? Maybe the lycra was, you know... Wow. Showing it all.

Yeah, lycra pants. Oh, my God. It's all go, guys. It's all go on the text machine. I'm one of nine of my dad's love childs. He slept with everybody. Oh, he just... Children.

Children. No, childs is the right term. We've been saying children wrong. So he just sprayed it around, really, like a sprinkler. How cute is this? My five-year-old is listening to the station, and he just said, Mum, I'm a love child,

and she said, I don't think you know what it means. And he said, no, I do. It's because I love you and you love me. Oh. What a start to the week. That'd break me. That's wholesome.

That's wholesome stuff. That's wholesome. Is it a caller of the week? I know it's a text, but. It's Monday. Calm down. You need to pull back. It's cute.

But it was wholesome and cute. It's cute. Wow. Let's see if we can't find a... Okay. Adie, good morning. Good morning. You are a love child. I am, yeah.

How much detail can you give us? I can give you pretty much everything except, yeah, I am the love child of the touring, one of the touring people of I Can Tina Turner in 1968 in London. Oh, wow. Oh, my God. So someone within her party. So Mum got backstage at the Tina Turner show.

Mum did. She got invited by this person to come and watch the I Can Teen a Turner concert that night. She was working at a hotel in London. And so they went along and here I am, 54 years later. Oh my God. And so do you still have contact with your biological father? So no, so good story. So I actually didn't find out until probably, I don't know,

about maybe six or seven years ago. Who did you think was your biological father? The man who had lived with us when I was younger. Oh, wow. I thought it was him, but there was always something that was a little bit odd and a bit different. And now that I look back at the photos, I look completely different to my siblings. Wow.

But my mum hadn't let up, and she accidentally got too far into a story. And, yeah, I kind of... But it's awesome because now she goes, now you know why I always listened to Tina Turner when you were growing up. And when she talks about it, she has a smile on her face, which makes me happy.

And it's a wicked story. But she let him know that she was pregnant. She had a $10 ticket to come out to New Zealand. Yeah. And she was showing a little bit earlier than what she thought she would. So she had to kind of get on an earlier plane and leave before anybody knew that she'd gotten pregnant.

How good was that back in the day? Like, oh, they've decided to get married real quick. Six months later, they've had a baby. It's like a man to the man. The baby's three months prem. Wow. And so you've never been able to... Eight pounds, three months prem.

You've never been able to track the sky down. Yeah, no, I never met him, but I tried to track him down with the Missing Persons program, but they didn't get very far because, yeah, sadly he was married and stuff like that, which was a bit, you know, not okay, but it's okay. But yeah, so that's my story. Wow. I love that.

That's a spicy start to life. Yeah, have you ever done one of those ancestry tests? No, I haven't, but I think it's probably a really good idea. Yeah, we know what you're made up of. It will literally show you who you're related to. Related to. You should 100%. Yeah, I need to do that.

Yeah, do it, do it. I should actually do that. So I found out I'm part German as well, because his last name is German, so. Right. Oh, well, guten tag. Guten tag, ja. Auf Wiedersehen. Auf Wiedersehen. A, so. Right. Oh, well, guten tag. Guten tag. Ja, guten tag. Auf Wiedersehen.

Auf Wiedersehen. Achtung. Ja. That makes me happy anyway. It's a wicked story. Yeah, it is, isn't it? Wow. Well, good luck doing the ancestry test.

I would 100% do that ASAP. Yeah, so interesting. Adi, thank you. Some messages in to finish. Oh, my God. My grandmother was a love child in Nazi Germany. Her father was a married soldier who was based in her mum's hometown. They fell in love and had my grandma.

He was around for a bit and then he got stationed somewhere else. They then believed he'd died in the war, but it turns out he'd just gone back to his original wife and family. My grandma made contact with him through the Red Cross and ended up having a semi-relationship with him until he passed away. Wow. There was a bit of that. Yeah.

There was a bit of that. There was a few babies born that looked a lot like American soldiers based around World War II, wasn't there? And you thought you were going to die, so why not? Yeah, why not? Oh, my God. You could die. Have you seen this one?

I just found out that my brother may not be my brother. My dad walked in to find his brother doing the dirty with his wife. Nine months later, my brother was born. What would that say on an ancestry site? You'd be very closely related, right? Very closely. Like, would it even... You've got shared DNA with your siblings. Yeah. Half-cousin?

Wild. I'm going to redact the name in this message. Okay. A friend of mine has a dad who is a love child of, insert well-known New Zealander here. My friend, insert well-known New Zealander's name here's grandson had his private school education paid for by, insert famous New Zealander's name here. Oh my God, I simply must know. We can't say. We're getting so much trouble.

I'm just going to peek at the computer screen. I don't know if I'm a love child. I think you would describe me more as a too much car lower after a darts tournament show. Yes. That's the person. Read Vaughan's message. We've got gas and you can't know it. We've got gas and you can't know it.

We've got gas and you can't know it. Great work, guys. 10 out of 10 if I say so myself. I'll do a 9.6. Is that enough for you to review this podcast with a high rating and then tell all your friends? You sound very insincere. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.