ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 24th July 2026

Episode Date: July 24, 2026

00.00: Vaughans break about laen mowers 06.00: Leg hair harrassment 10.20: Top 6 uses for the Tirau building 16.45: Fletch and Hayley do their own Top 6 19.10: The new Millenial grey 22.30: When was there a bug at a bad time? 34.05: Hayley's social conundrum 39.25: TV wrap up Lily Allen, Ali G ect 43.10: SLP - What is the more Basic B meal? Butter chicken or Pad Thai? 47.50: When did someone else's breakup ruin your plans? 55.20: Fact of the day 1.01.50: Cringest thing you wear  1.04.10: Vaughan's takeover  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

from the ZM podcast network. This is... Fleshwon and Haley's Big Pod. Thanks to animates, making happy happen for pets. Fleege Fawn and Haley, it's nine past six. Haley and I,

broadcasting from the crash suit studio this morning. Kowler. All worn all alone. I'm okay. I like me alone. Sorry. It's an introvert's dream, actually, to not actually have to deal with people

in person at this time of the morning. Do you feel sort of a sense of relief? Yeah. Might actually dim the lights and play with myself, that's cool. Oh, can you not in the workplace, please? That's really forbidden.

That's right. You shouldn't do that at work rather than you should. No, no, no. And also, it's not, we don't just not play with ourselves because the other two people are there.

You're, the cameras are rolling the whole time. Right. I can cover those up. That's easy, please. Gosh, I can't get it. Now, we'll be later today, after 9.30,

if you're in Christchurch, town hall, be there because we have tickets to Fletchbourne and Haley, the live show in Christchurch. We've got a special machine, don't we? Now, I've got the $100 bills. I've written

all over them and that you've got to get in there, get your hand in there, try to grab some, get a double pass to come see us at our nearly completely sold out show. Now, Vaughn, I believe you've got something to discuss. I do actually. Thank you for that seamless segue.

You're bumped to break. Well, you were to jumping in there. I was going to jump in when she was finished. Thank you for letting me speak. Clunky. I'm a man. I'll let a woman say her peace. I'm not want to stomp all over that. So, this story came across my desk, and I'm just like, this is amazing.

Fletch, this is really going to tickle your fancy. Okay. Let's go to France. Oh, again, well, you guys have just been to France. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. God, Tans already fading, though. I noticed it yesterday in the shower. I was like, well, that's going.

That's going to go quite quickly with this winter. We don't need to hear any more about your Parisian adventures, unless Fletch wants to tell us that story. No, no, no, that's personal. No, Fletch is never telling that story. That's just for brunch. That's a brunch chat. It's just brunch for genuine friends, mate.

So this is where you do. Okay, Haley, that's your buy-in. France. Yep. My buy-in is a man is on his tractor and he's mowing a field. That's you. Where's my buy-in? His switch is buying.

Who's the hot people? World War II Ordinance. Oh, okay, I'm in. A man is... Tickle, he's tickled. A man in Soam, is that my own. I'm saying that right, S-O-M-M-M-A, Battle of Soam. I think I've heard that said.

Som. Yeah. Somme. Is mowing his field. with a tractor with a mower behind it and he hits a World War II explosive. Does it explosive? Dude, it explosives.

I think he's an explosive. Did it it explode it? It explodes it straight through. Is he all right? Straight through his trip. So apparently like, fine, it just exploded up. So they don't know what it is. There's going to be like investigations.

But they think it's like literally a 70-something year old landmine. That's just been sat there. Do you know, I actually did wonder this the other day, like, flying in over all these, like, forests and fields of Europe. I was, like, on the approach to the airport, I was like, I wonder how many, like, bombs there are still in forests. You just don't know. It's so vast. Apparently, it's, and I know in Germany, it's not a weird thing if a building's doing, like, excavations in their basements or whatever, they'll be like, oh, that looks like a bomb that never went off that fell. And so they evacuate the building and a professional squad.

comes. And it's like here we have those, you know, you'll be driving around and you see a van that's like, we specialize in asbestos clean up. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. And parts of Europe, we specialize at unexploded World War. I mean, thank God he ran over it with this big machine and not some

like kid frolicing in a field. So I just sent a, I sent a picture, I sent the Facebook link to the group chat if you want to have a look at how. You're going to have to send it to all the listeners listening now. Oh, we can pop that. Yeah, that's easy. Because we've excluded them here. So he's towing like a thing on the back of it.

Yeah, like a tow behind mower. But this is, like I looked at other pictures of this. This is a new... Got that thing, sorry just to say for a second. That thing had mow my lawn in about two up and downs. Yeah. It'd be navigating the tractor towing it. That'd be the problem with mowing.

Wow. And so the blades have obviously gone over the bomb and explore. Oh, that's exciting. But this isn't new farmland. This is a farmland for, I don't know, It certainly doesn't look like it's recently been cultivated. Like, wow, hey. And it was so close to the surface that a moa that technically doesn't touch the surface set it off.

Jeez, that's terrifying. This has really actually put me off the idea of moving to France, actually. Yeah, because I was lured in by all the hot people and the pastries croissant and that kind of stuff, the rich history. But if I'm going to be getting exploded by mines, that's a bit of a sort of a point against moving to France. Someone in the comment said, I met a farmer who used to farmland in Europe and he used to drive with a half an inch thick steel plate

under his tractor seat because they were aware of the fact that there was unexploded ordinance in their field. No, I just wouldn't be a farmer. Are you guys imagining that kind of comic, like, cartoon-esque, like it explodes under and he goes, and just like flies into the air, wee in his tractor seat? I imagine the bomb looks like a cartoon bomb.

Yeah, with acme on it. Yeah, with Acme, that's what I'm imagining. I hadn't imagined it. I just wanted to be like driving a tractor and having a horrendous explosive rock through you. Yeah, probably. It's a lot worse. I'm trying to, I'm making it too light.

You're quite right. Be aware out there in France. Be safe out there. Be safe. Be safe. If any of our farmer, French farming listeners. Yeah, bonjour. Bono, but be careful.

I've hit a rock with a lawnmower and that was scary enough. Yeah, I don't think that's equivalent. A great way of trying to relate to this bomb, bro. The ZANN Podcast Network Before we deal with this You've got to stop remotely feeding your cat Vaughan he's got

He's got his remote feeder And it's got a camera on it He keeps calling Muzz over Which is the cutest thing His little beady You know eyeballs Light up Is it like night vision

So yes Yeah night Viz It's got a night vision camera on my pet feeder And he keeps going Muz And Muzz runs over to the machine And he's like

Shall he feed him He's feed him three times Already this morning Oh no that's enabling actually Well I've left him alone and he's cold and lonely. You've got a feeder thing here. You need to pull off.

But very cute. Now, we would just say, it's actually quite balmy around New Zealand this morning. Kikota, 14 degrees currently. Actually, 14.9. A big ear, we'll call that 50. Yeah, it's the calm before the storm, before the cold snap.

The cold snap. But also very warm. Europe famously have been in the heat waves. The UK's had heat waves. People struggling in the UK because they're like, what is this? heat and now Tokyo they're having a real big

heat wave at the moment and I don't know if you've been to Tokyo way no Vaughn have you? No I haven't been to Japan it's definitely on my list Oh yeah you're a bit of Japan I'll thrive in Japan In Tokyo Don't say it why'd you say it like that

Why do you have to make it right there? Guys that was more from a nerdy side of things like Arrogato So it sounded like you'll be at those vending machines Yeah yeah with the Harasukkah Girls around Well, you know, I did in 2004 love Gwen Stefani's album, Love Angel Music Baby, and I myself dressed up like Harah Rishaku girl.

Actually, kind of crazy we let that album happen. But it's a banger album as well. I'm so torn. Anyway, so they've been dealing with a big heat wave, summer heat wave. And so the government has been, yeah, the government's been encouraging men in particular because in Tokyo, they really dress with a good sense of style, the men in particular, All in suits, really, you know, hold themselves well. They've been told, it's called Sanehira, they've got to get their legs out for summer.

And so they've been encouraged to wear shorts for the first time. I will say women still encourage to wear panty hose. Oh, really? What is it a panty hose like in summer? I'm wearing a panty hose today, actually, because it is, I'm in Christchurch, and I was anticipating coldness. It's definitely a layer because it's right on the skin. Yeah. It's not as nice as a bare leg, for sure.

It's not breathable? Yeah, that's what I'm wondering, because it's right on the skin. It's not like... Yeah, not breathable. I'll say it's a thrush machine, if you're in that for too long. You know what I mean?

So they're not appreciating the manly legs. So sorry, Sanehara is the term which translates to leg hair harassment that women are complaining. Sanehara, they're saying, oh my God, we don't need to see these legs and these men with their hairy legs out and about in public.

But it's a heat wave. We shave ours and wear tights. And then the men are all there with their legs that these women have never seen before. And they're like, oh my God, Sanahara, like stop harassing me with those horrendous white chicken legs with all the hair. But they're saying it's so hot.

And in general, like most people would oppose to shorts, but they're all just trying it. So if you're like in Tokyo at the moment, you might notice men in like suits, shirts, ties, heading off to their workplace. But with shorts. Yeah, and women are feeling like Sanihara, like leg hair harassment.

put that shit away. It's like when Vaughn, you know, post-winter has his first day in the George. Yeah. It's quite a lot. And he kicks open the door and it's like, it's a dire situation in the leg department at the moment. Very pale and the feet.

Almost a blue hue. Yeah, yeah. Translucent. Yeah. Well, now there's a turn to it. Maybe I need to go to the sunbed with you two. No. Oh, we would never.

We don't do that. We read an article. They do. No, you would never. We actually just were in Paris, bro. This is sunshine tan. How many, what did you call it? Hours?

How many hours did you get done before you were? You wouldn't go over hours. He just going for minutes. Yeah, but it adds up to hours, isn't I? This is slander. You're trying to paint a terrible picture of us. I'll admit to the party dance. If you're going to pay or shame me, I'll let everybody know the secret to your golden success.

Do you know why? It's because I'm Māori and we'll just call it there. You know what? He's gone quiet now, isn't he? It's hard to argue with a brown woman. How about these sorts of things? Yeah. Nah.

That'll do, I reckon. Play, that ends, Flesh forne and Haley. From the unmoderated comment section, this is the top six. Yes, good morning. If you've ever driven through the Waikato, South Wicato town of Tito, you'll be familiar with some beautiful corrugated iron structures. And some stunning homeware stores. I do always stop at Tito for some op-shopping and some grey-homeware.

Yeah, but it's these buildings that we'd be. talking about they get the tourists out of their car. They take a photo because, you know, the... It's the eyesight, eh? Yeah, the buildings look like a dog and a sheep. A dog, a sheep and a ram. So the sheep building was built in 1994. They ran a wool and craft store on the site.

And then the sheep was joined by the ram in 2005. And the rest of the town was like, well, I guess that's our thing now. Corrigated iron. Get on board. Bulls have bulls. We've got corrugated iron. pregnant of iron animals. Now the dog wasn't up for sale because that's the information center. Yeah, that's your eyesight where you go and you learn about the area and get maps and recommendations and take a post.

You find out there's nothing to do so you keep driving to somewhere like to pole. No, I think they've got a bloody bend on outlet. Thank you. They do. They do, don't they? Tito's very close to that beautiful blue spring that popped up on everybody's Instagram. Remember when that virus was ravaging the world and we all had to just tourists in our own country? Yes, yeah.

But you're not allowed to swim in there, are you? swimming. Yeah, because they put it in bottles to sell. They don't want your mankies. You know, when you're fash and your toenails in there. Or bum juice. Probably someone would pay a little bit extra for a bit of foot in that water, I reckon. A bit of foot in bum juice, yeah.

I don't know about the bum juice to be totally honest. The foot. Don't yuck someone else's young, brother. The SPCA has been in the RAM building since 2022, but they may have to vacate as it's been purchased for $1.5 million just above RV, the sheep and the ram. So I've got the top six uses for the Tiro corrugated iron sheep and ram buildings. Number six on the list.

Did you just pronounce corrugated like a Māori word? Because he said Tiro beautifully. Tiro corrugated. Corgates. Okay. Number six on the list. Ram Raid Rehab Centre. If you're addicted to the rammin.

Yeah. Ram raid. They've kind of stopped now, haven't they? Can I just say Fletch just for a second? Does anybody going to acknowledge the great pie? It's a RAM you see. There's a RAM raid rehab. If you've just joined us, we're in separate studios, Fletch and I in Christchurch.

Can't he just a private Christchurch conversation? Oh, okay. Sorry, go ahead. Oh, I'll block my ears. I think he's going to go puns. I think it's just going to be puns, man. Because you know I've banned the top six from having puns before. Yeah, you have.

When there are too many bad ones. But that was a good one. Okay, we'll bring him back. Okay, sorry, Gordon, carry on. You're really like the next one. Then number five on the list of the top six uses for the Tito, corrugated iron sheep and ram buildings are Woolworths. Okay, that's really good.

That's actually good. That's good. That's actually good. That's actually good. It could be one of those little ones. You know, yeah, a metro. A metro.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Metro and Tito. Really good. Number four on the list of the top six years for the Tito corrugated iron sheep and ram buildings are barbure. Nah, there we are.

I knew it was coming. A barbour. I don't hate, hate it. I just, it's a sitter. If he didn't do it, be disappointed, but there it is. That's exactly why it's number four, Haley.

It's exactly why it's number four. Number three on the list of the top six yes is with the Tito, corrugated iron, sheep and ram buildings. The New Zealand YouTube Centre. Again, I'm not mad, but I don't know why I didn't laugh. YouTube headquarters. Do you know what to be like it's funny, but it didn't make me laugh? That would actually be a funny name for a cafe in that building.

YouTube. Yeah. I want to be a funny name for a cafe It would be a funny name for a video production Or a no computer store You know like an internet cafe A train station, a train station, YouTube There's no train

Or piping station there Piping plumbing A plumbing shop, YouTube Yeah, that would be good Any of Fletcher's suggestions for a shop I'm a comedian Four sell at shows It shows

Yeah For sold out shows in Christchurch this weekend Yeah Well done Thank you If you can help us sell out our Christchurch, they'll be bloody great. Oh, why do you think we're down here, but?

The way that we're here. Number two on the list of the top six years with the Tito, corrugated iron, sheep and ram buildings are Bar-Rista. But you've already done bar-bar. I mean, it's just the same joke with a different thing on the end. Yeah, dude. No, that was slack. I think that's why the Christchurch show hasn't sold out yet.

Bar-Rista. Why have we peaked at Woolworth? And you put that at five. You wait. Number one on the list of the top six years is for the Tito, corrugated iron sheep and ram building. are Lamborghini dealership. Oh, okay.

Who's buying a Lamborghini and Tito? I'm sorry. Who's stopping you're buying 400-dollar cast iron pants from some homeware store? It always blows my mind that anyone goes to Tito to drop that much cash.

Well, this is true actually. I might get a Lamborghini. Okay. Yep. I'm not mad about the puns. It's okay. It was a good top six. No, hang on he's got one more, doesn't he?

No, that's it. Lamborghini. I would have made war words, number one. No, Woolworth is number five, because number five always has to be good, because number six is shit, number five brings them back in, number four is the average one, number three's where I don't know where to put it anywhere else. Number two is not that great, and number one's a strong one. That's how it's got a structure.

I don't like being in the sausage factory knowing how it's made. Yeah, because now I'm going to be listening through that lens in the future. It wasn't bad. So you're not putting a ban? No, I'm not putting a pun ban yet. Okay. Yeah. number six is always the worst one

and then number five number four or number two are weak ones that just fill a game I mean why don't you make all six great you're saying three out of six are consciously shit and exactly how many of that how many is three of six 50% and what is that a 50% is

are past that's right please get degrees babies baby that doesn't just have to be at school you can carry that on throughout your entire life kids that's today's top six The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Flesh Vaughan and Haley

During the ad break after the top six The top six uses for the corrugated iron Ram and sheep buildings in Tito Yeah We have been brainstorming some more Because what we did was we actually Puns because we sort of shed on Vaughn For taking the pun angle

And then we started having our fun with it Are you ready Vaughan? Yeah And you've got your own top six Yeah Fletch and Hayle's top six What do you mean kind of? If it's not sex shops.

If it's not sex, it's top something else. Fletch and Haley's top six shops for the sheep in you barns in Tito. Okay, number six, it's, okay, number six on the list. That's a shoddy presentation, by the way. Does this one have to be shit? No, you have to get in a little bit. Okay, number six is a mattress shop called sheepy head. You can sheep on it.

Okay, I like it. That was good. That was good. That was good. Number five, it's, we'll just turn it into a pickup stop. It's the Uber ride share station. Number four is, this is for the girlies after you didn't pee after Coitus. You go to the UTI station for your urinary tract infections.

What I would have done there from a professional top six rider, literally I'm paid to do it. I wouldn't have put two U ones back to back there. You did U-Barr. We could have gone. To be honest, U-Barr and ride sharing. You got three for one there. That was great.

That's really good. You should have put in the Ramstein merchandise. The Ramstein merchandise shop. That's number four. Was that number four? Is that number three? That's number three.

That's number three on the list was the Ramstein merchandise shop. Number two is a ramen shop. Now, so you're always all cooked here. Raman. Like, yeah, I get what you mean. That's Raman. Raman.

Raman shop. You went, you, you, ram, ram. But get this, number one on the list. Yep. It's a gay bar. Yeah. It's a gay bar called ram it in. Anyway, so.

I don't know how well that would go in Tito. A gay bar. Do you know what? I think you'd be surprised how well that. Yeah, a couple of those undercover farmers. They shut down that big old pub over the road. Those boys are going to go drink somewhere. Anyway, the top six.

It is quite hard. We really appreciate your Mahi Vaughn. Play ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. Millennial Grey's been roasted for years, right? This was me. This was you. Yep. And millennials, they loved their sort of, like, maybe kind of Swedish-inspired, white walls, grey furnishings.

And then people start saying. Boring minimalist. Bring back the clutter. There he is, my boy. Well, I will say, you know. Our clutters are a little bit of a different clutter, though. Our clutters are different clashes. My little bits and pieces.

My lightsabbers and such. Yeah, no, but, Vourney, I love to see it, even those, and I say this with love and respect, even those horrendous lazy boy arm chairs. I'm like, the boy is breaking free of the mould of his previously boring house. But those were my nans chairs. Totally. And I love it. And I love it.

Because I got so many fond memories of having, like, a cup of tea and a chat about the Warriors with my nannies. But you like, I love it. But they don't go with anything. Dude, I don't care. They don't go with the goddamn thing, but Christ, that are the most. comfortable chairs. They don't look at but you're still in them

you're like, oh, that's nice. Listen, they're not going to my house. But I'm happy that you're in, they're in yours. And then remember, the millennial grey moved to side and we were all like, we're going green.

And that's what I've done. And you've gone green and everyone's like, hon, green's just the new millennial grey. And I'm like, oh, well, it looks nice. And also you're a millennial, so. It looks nice. It looks nice. Well, move aside millennial grey.

Move aside millennial green. There is a new millennial colour. Okay, what is like? They say middle class millennials, love this colour in their home decor. It makes them feel stylish. It makes them feel like they're being bold but subtle enough to kind of go with everything. It's Move.

If you don't know what Move is, think of lavender, but add in a bit of pink and it kind of soft greyy purple. Like a kind of soft greyy purple. Yes. Now none of us have this in our house. That's not for me. I've got purple in my house. My mind's very bold.

It's plum, it's dark. But Move, it's the new millennial grey people are loving it. They're saying don't just reserve it for accents. Get in there, splash it around absolutely everywhere. Apoltery, wallpaper, florals, fabrics, walls, everything. Warm and inviting, lovely. Aren't you a Nana's old sofa chairs, Moe, born? No, no, no, no.

No, they're brown. Maroon, brown. They're brown, but they've got years of just human living in them, and they've got it. They do it in sort of a different tone and different. Do you think, Vaughan, you know, that moving forward, because you've got pink tiles, like there is a world in which you could incorporate move into the home. It's a bit too purple.

I was just trying to, I was looking at this, trying to describe something that this color for people who aren't, you know, all up on their Razan color charts. I just don't even know what to compare it to. No. It's like lavender with more pink, red pink in them, but then light. Pinky purple, but light. Yeah. Like pastily pinky purple.

It's not for me. It's not for me, but apparently it's the new... You're millennial green. And I'll wait for the next thing to come along. I'm millennial every single colour like Rainbow House. And Vaughn's... What is my colour? Well, it's still white walls, but Nanny's brown armchairs.

Play Z-N's Fleshhorn and Haley. So we're in Christchurch. As you mentioned, 930 we'd have at the town hall, giving away some tickets to our FVH live show. But to get here, we had to fly was the quickest way. And producer Shannon's here with us. Producer Shannon's looking after us. And you were sat yesterday in the window seat of the plane.

You had a baby next to you. And then a match. She handled the baby quite well, I will say. It was next to you. It was fun for about three minutes. We talked about Moana. He said I looked like Elsa. All was good.

And then he got into the poking game. And I was kind of over it. And dad got involved. You said the baby? Baby, but you were saying he's holding a conversation with you. No, no, no. It was a toddler. I just saying they're a baby until they're a teenager.

Right, okay. Right. Closer to baby than retirement age is what you're saying. So they're a baby. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's how I measure it. But then there was a kerfuffle next to you with the dad. Did you clock it first or did I clock it?

You clocked it. So I look over and the dad of the baby slash toddler is like, like, like jiggling his body all like this. And then I hear like, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And he's like stomping something. And I was like, what the hell? And he lifts his foot and he turns around to me. And he's like, and there's a cockroach.

And he's just stomped this thing. Yark. Did you see it pre-stomped, Shan? No, I thought he was doing a bit with his son. Like I thought he was like, look at Dad, I can dance. Stop poking that woman next to you. Yeah. And then, yeah, I just hear the, like, it was a ferocious stomp to kill that cockroach.

Yeah, yeah. He squashed it dead. Was it big? no it was like manageable but you're holding up like two inches it was smaller than the cockroach that climbed up our lovely friend's bumhole that she had to get removed to remember it's a famous story

famous show stories but yeah it was a cockroach and I looked at him and I was like oh my god and he was like did I bring that on the plane or was it in the plane because it crawled up his shirt and out of his neck and that's when he like he like buffled

they'd also just been overseas so this was a connecting flight for them They had Judy Freebag, so they weren't sure if it was a New Zealand cockroach or they had bought it with them. So he was actually doing a service really stomping this thing to do hell. Do you know where there'd been, like Bali or something? Singapore. Singapore, right, okay. Oh, yeah, yeah.

So a Singaporean cockroach, I believe, hitched a ride on this man's torso, and it chose the flight from Auckland to Christchurch to come out. But anyway, he was like, you know that feeling of when a bug? Oh, yeah, when it crawls over you? Yeah, yeah. Anyway, we love these bug stories And I want to know from our listeners When was there a bug at a bad time?

Wait, wait, this is such a bold move For someone with a deathly fear of moths. Hey, hey, hey, hey, we're not chucking on. Hey, guys, Friday morning, tell us what a bug absolutely ruined your day Because you know how many people share your fare Or are going to ring up and say the word over and over? Well, we'll just handle it well. Okay, people have these crawl in their ears when they sleep.

Yeah, well, let's just sort of like mitigate, I mean, Carwins the Amati's there. going to mitigate those stories. This was your idea for a phone and topic, Haley. Yeah. I'm sort of just pausing to reflect. What, like, what have you done to yourself here? You've got a deathly fear of the MOT.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, let's just listeners, like, dance around the stories about the MOTHs. We're all going to do phone in topics of things we're scared of. Fletcher's is going to be about commitment. And... When couldn't you commit? Yeah, when did someone overstated welcome and you were like, what do you doing it?

What are you doing? And then we'll do a phone or? on sort of impending mortality for Vort. Yeah. Perfect. What are you terrified? You're not going to accomplish before you die prematurely. That's going to be the bonus topic after that. Okay, well we'll start with mine. I want to know

whatever bug it may be. When was there a bug at a bad time? I reckon we're going to get some wild stories from people that were overseas because their bugs are bigger. Bigger and everywhere and they're in you and up you and around you. Okay, I'll wait a hundred a dial set him is the number you can text through.

A bug. At a bad time. I'll tell you what, you want to get out because Kimberly joins us. Hi, Kimberly, buy Kimberly. Love you, Hong. Hey, that's like, Haley. Love you. Love you.

She'll be back soon. Headphones off. Okay, right. Haley's in the corner, rocking herself. In tears. When was there a bug at a bad time? I mean, we worked out what bug at us. It's a mouth, wasn't it?

Yeah. So, Haley and I have the same very giant fear. Can you say the word? Can you say the word, though, because if we say the word, Haley shudders? I don't like saying it. Say it, say it. I don't have to spell it like Haley does, but, yeah, it still gives me the absolute heby-jeeves and shivers. Moss?

Dusty, yeah. I'm in the room still, Fletch. I've just got my headphones off. So is there one specific incident where this thing haunted you? Yes. So a whole group of my old best friends and we hadn't seen each other in years

and decided to take a little friend strobe up to Mungawai is. And so we're out in the whops and on the periphery this giant peri-ri I think you're called those giant green ones They are not

They are They're the cuckapur They're the cuckapur The Moth World I reckon They are disgusting Demon creatures Yeah okay I decided that it was going to stalk me.

It must have knew how terrified I was. And kind of just like on the periphery just kind of hung out above me. And unbeknownst to me at one point when we were sitting out on the deck, it came and landed on my back. Thank God my friends know how terrified I am. And while I was going into dying mode and wanted to just cry, couldn't move because I was so terrified. They had to try and remove this thing from my back and get it away from me.

a bit of a trip I'm sure it wouldn't but I can't go into half an hour that beautiful I've just been quite you've been telling me that story

I've been googling and she's back in she's back in she's back in she's back in I'm back in I'm back it landed on her back

yeah yeah I caught some little bits through the headphones on the table I heard demon creature

of which honestly Kimberly I could not agree more and yeah oh Oh, man. Okay.

Kimberly, thank you for sharing that horrible phobia. Thank you for sharing it, but never do it again. You never share it again. Some messages in Vaughan. Yeah, I was sitting outside having a coffee and a fag, as you do, reads this message room. I'm away by. So we're still calling, I think we say darts, douries. No, I think calling a cigarettes a fag about this is the only thing you really can call that anymore.

Wait, do it, is the coffee brand still fags? Fag's distinction. So it may, is it still? She might have been having a fags and a fag. Fags and a fact, that's two Gs on the coffee, one on the cigarette. And that's the only way we use it. My cup was sat next to me. I went to have a swig.

Felt something in me gob. Spat it onto the stairs in front of me. Significantly sized cockroach had been in my mouth. Oh, yuck. Made my coffee at 5.30 a.m., getting ready to walk the dog, got to the bottom of the coffee, and there was a dead, scolded cockroach in there. I panicked.

I thought I was going to die. I was having a deliciously refreshing coke from a can, left it on the table way. I potted around. Took a swig and I felt something before swallowing. Why is there so many people ingesting? Gagged and spat out the biggest blowfly I've ever seen. Ooh.

They're mingy. With the bluey green eyes. Yeah, the ass. Ooh, yeah, a little pearlescent. I believe Emily is online too, Vaughan. If we can go to Emily, Emily, when was there a bug at a bad time? That last one made me, like, physically gag. Yeah, awful, bab.

Well, we're here to make you feel something, Emily, on the radio show. I just don't, I don't, I want to apologise personally. I started this and it was such a stupid idea. Yeah. So, so in Christchurch, the Northern Motorway, it's huge, you go 100Ks. Yes, big. There's a lot of my car. Oh, wasks, sucky.

People have driven off the road because of these. It, like, wouldn't, I had all four windows down. I don't drive a big car. And it was four windows down and it wouldn't leave it. It was trying to go out my windshield. I literally pulled over like almost into the ditch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To get this thing out of my car.

I was so scared. I was like, no, no, no, I don't do wasst. Don't mind bees. Yeah. You have a purpose. Wasp, you serve nothing. No purpose. No purpose.

Yeah. Terror. That's it. How annoying is it, Emily? Like you've got all four windows up, but it's like at my house. A fly up, we're banging against the kitchen window. I'll be like, oh, excuse me. you sir, I'll let you out. You've got to open the window.

They're like, actually, I'm going to go try over here. Allow me to help you, sir. That doesn't open in your house? Yes. That one, yeah. Yeah, you're trying to shoot them out. Throwing things at it, trying to get it out. I was like, trying to guide it.

Yeah. Did you kill it eventually? This makes me think maybe we keep... No, it flew out. Eventually, I managed to guide it with a, with a piece of paper that I'd found on the floor. I would have killed it. If you had the piece of paper, I just would have squashed it. Yeah, at that point, you're like, I've done everything to try to help you.

Sorry, German murderer. I don't want to chuck it. Yeah, yeah. Emily, thank you. It might sting you, babes. It might sting, yeah. Well, at least you didn't drive off the road into a power pole. People have done that.

Yeah. Morning Tim, I got out of the shower and out of habit. I shook my towel before using it, and a very large black, leggy spider came flying out and landed on the shower door. And immediately Spider-Man onto the door and held on. I made what was described as a non-human sound. I dropped the towel, ran out of the bathroom,

dripping water all through the house, the towel got burnt, and the spider died of raid death and was left for my husband to deal with when he got home on the floor. Yeah, sometimes you need to drown a bug in raid or black flag. For you, you do it, eh? One spray's not enough. One spray kills it, the rest of it, the holding down, that's for you. That's revenge. And do you do this when you're killing a bug that nearly kind of ruined your day?

While you're spraying it, you're like, tell the others. Spread the word. Let this be a warning. These cans are five bucks and I've got 20. Yeah. I'm going to get it all. Someone said when as a kid I woke up really early in the morning and went to the lounge to watch a video, a VHS video,

and I wasn't going to wake up the parents. It was secret. I shouldn't have been out of bed. Reached into the cupboard to get out the VHS and a wetter crawled on my hand. Oh, they're amazing though. I've had a few of them around home lately. They are a beautiful creature.

I've got a lot of time for them. I don't want it on my bod. I got stuck on the Vaj. When a wasp crawled into my knickers when I was on the toilet. It was so painful I had to sit on an inflatable ring for a few days because she was so swelled up. A bit puffy lips.

Oh, puffy lips. Oh no, waspy puffy lips. Ouch. Ouch. Ouch. Would you call that a ming sting? A mingsting. What?

Did that sound better in your head, eh? And then when you said it out later that. They sort of look like there's similar. They've both got ironing. and they should work really well together. It should work but it didn't. Minge stinge. The Z&M Podcast Network.

Play ZDEMS, Fletch, Forne and Haley. We're down in Christchurch today and I'm spending the whole weekend here doing four shows in Christchurch, all sold out. Very excited. But I have dreams of being a global viral comedian. You know, clips are going everywhere. Oh, funny.

and Oh, funny. Did you see this? Did you see this clip? Oh, share, share, right? And I did say to producer Shannon, how do I make this happen? Like how do I? And she was like, you've got to post more.

Yeah. And at times it makes sense. And I did that three times, I think, this year. She said sometimes daily. Yeah. Do you stand by this advice? Yeah, so Instagram and Facebook, I'd recommend daily. and then TikTok, they say up to five times a day is peak.

Oh, piss off. So anyway, whatever. I think Haley's too lazy to become famous. I don't even do five things a day. Yeah, let alone five interesting things to film. Yeah. But anyway, so I had this one clip, and it's like the kind of big bit of my show from last year about condoms,

and if you've seen it, you know it. And it got posted online, and suddenly, and I think I might have even shared this, it had 1.5 million views. like, viral. But call Daily Mail, she's gone viral. Put it in the sun. And so for ages,

that's been my like most viewed stand-up clip, 1.5 million views. And I was like, here we go. And she's like, I'm going to leave radio, I'm going to move to Hollywood. I penned an email. Yeah.

It's been great, Fletch and Vaughn, but I'm off. And she was constantly humming that song, Hollywood. Yeah, exactly. Live at the Apollo. Yeah. Live at the Hollywood Bowl.

Yeah, yeah, live at Madison Square Garden. So why now, Shannon, our social media producer and dear friend, is it down to 50,000 views? Wait, you've lost a million views? I literally, and this is one of the most egotistical things that I did, went to my own Instagram feed just to see the number on the club and be like, viral sensation. Haley Sprout, head of my sellout weekend.

And it's gone down to just over 50,000. Where's my other one? 1.4 million views. You know, is this what it feels like to be in a relationship with a man who doesn't listen? Because I feel like I constantly tell you the same thing about consistency and listening to me. But they were there and that.

You can't unsee a video. Yeah, but I'm talking about the consistency. We've got to keep posting. We've got to nurture this audience. But where did the people go? I don't know. So that was 1.4 million views and now it's 56.9.

So Instagram and Meta had a huge bot Take out. So what I am wondering, and I'm not accusing you, I'm questioning, were you buying views? Do you know what? What? No, no, no, I wasn't buying views, but this was a co-lab post. Oh. Has this person who unfriended you?

No, this isn't the Ursula clip. That's legitimate views, and I sometimes wish they'd leave us a lot. It's a shared post with the New Zealand International Comedy Festival. Have they uncollabbed you? No, no, no, they've still collabed me on it. Oh, okay. Do you think there was something afoot there? So, hang on.

So there's robots, though, because let's spin this into a positive. Because we are moving towards an AI future. Will these robots come to see my show live at the Apollo in the future? Do you know, when you buy views, it's not even robots. They're actually real people. Where have they gone? This is my question. This is, it looked so good on my feed.

This viral clip, it's gone. It's all gone. So you're not viral. Or anything to add here? I don't know. How do you deal with women when they get like this? Just tell me it's not because the clip's not as funny. Because I was like, that's a good clip.

And then the 1.5 million people agreed. Yeah. And now 50,000 people have seen her and not that many liked it. You know what I mean? So just ahead of a sell-out four-show weekend. Right. So you're not resigning yet. You're not moving to Hollywood?

Yeah, as well, I think I'm going to hit send on that email as well. And I was like, sucker, oh, ma'all. You've become famous. You could say you were. were hacked. I was hacked. You were hacked. And they sent that email and they took away all your views.

Because I think for me, like, I am passionate about comedy, but for me, it's the immediate connection of radio. And that's where I... Oh, wait, you want to stay now. You know, it might be centrist if I could stay because my viral clip's no longer viral. It's kind of actually done quite badly. People were sort of vaccinated against it and the virus was stopped in its tracks. Yeah, it was.

Right. Okay, well, it's good to have you back. Okay, someone just messaged in some suggestions to help you become a viral sensation again as a comedian. Okay, okay. Get Vaughn to tell Haley to calm down and video her response and we'll go viral again. Yeah, that kind of covers both bases of Fletch asking how to deal with sort of erratic woman and also how to get another viral hit. Okay, okay. Well, okay, well, let's just wait for a better time of my menstrual cycle for that and we'll get that up.

Okay. A-Sat. Play. Play, Z-N. Flet's Wornin-Haley. Lily Ellen, I'd say woman of the moment. I've been watching so many clips of her concert.

And it's just amazing. She's just... And she's here soon? She's back. Yeah. She's here soon? Are we going? Anyway, that's personal admin.

So, news overnight. Prime Video has officially confirmed a feature-length documentary on Lily Ellen. So it promises an intimate portrait of the life and career of a global icon and a voice of a generation. It's directed by Matt Whitecross, who's directed a documentary on Oasis, documentary on Coldplay, set for release next year. Going to track her journey from like the girl that we knew, Sun is in the Sky OI-O-Y-O-Y to the West End Girl era of now. Her marriage breakdown, all the drama with David Harbour, which that whole album is about,

interviews of people that know her. Yeah, it's just going to basically be like she's back and better than ever. So that's prime video for next year. God, I bet when this was announced, David Harbour was like, oh, for the fuck. He's like, oh, when's it going to end? Do you think he regrets being that much of a piece of work? I would say, I hope that the woman he had an affair with was worth it.

I hope that was the best shag of your life, David, because man, he's paying for it, isn't he? Also news yesterday, and I thought this was going to, be a TV series, but it's actually a movie. Sasha Baron Cohen is bringing back Ali G. Ali G. Because I saw him in character.

Was it FIFA? The FIFA World Cup, right? That he was in character as Ali and he was up to shenanigans and was getting arrested, which is a classic. They must be cutting that fine because it's the end of July and this movie will be out on October 23. But I wonder if he was doing that for like promo. Oh my God, Ali G's here.

So that's going to be out, I think, in Amazon. on as well in theatres and then maybe streaming. Oh, that's such a blast from the past. Is it? L.E.G. was part of a bigger kind of sketch show that he did, right? And it was one of his first characters. It was on a show that where the character of Borat was originally developed.

Ali G's this like rapper, like wannabe rapper. Yeah, it's going to be called Ali G, who is I? Who is I? Yeah, because the way it worked was people didn't know he was taking the piss, but surely it's a well enough established character now that everybody knows the gag. So I wonder what the...

Because he interviewed people, right? Remember one of his things was like he interviewed Victoria Beckham. And it's one of the most viral interviews ever. It's so funny. What he would do is that people thought he was a cameraman or a producer and then he would go in last minute and sit in the seat and they were always like, oh, okay. Oh my God.

And he was just outrageous. Of course, it's Sasha Baron Cohen. Also, I mean, let's do a little bit of a what we're watching at the moment while we're talking about TV and movies. Because Will Ferrell's got a TV show? Have you seen this? I haven't. But he's a golf player, right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I thought when I saw it, I was like, first of all, I was like, oh shit, it's a series, not a movie. Oh, yeah. And I started watching it. I was like, this feels like a movie. It's shot like a movie. It's kind of scripted like a movie.

And I was like, is this Wilfair or who I love, but doing kind of like a rough sort of, I don't know, surface-level bad version of Talladega Knights? It's brilliant. It's so funny. He plays a golfer. The hawk, right? Hawke, yeah, who had a heyday

and is now much older but still plays golf but isn't as good. And it's not an underdog story, like, it's so positive and fun and kind of like Ted Lasso vibes, like, he's like an awesome character. The script is so funny, the improv's ridiculous.

It's super worth watch. Netflix. Netflix. The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Flethorn and Haley. Silly little poll is which is the more basic bitch meal to order is it a butter chicken or a pad tie? Fletch's two favorites. Yum, yum, yum.

And there is nothing wrong with either of those two meals. They deliver every time. You know what you're getting. Someone messaged insane. White people food. Yeah, a bunch of white people here. Vanilla white people food. Yeah.

Well, not you, Vaugh, you turn your nose up. No, I love just trying something different. Something spicy. Went out for dinner last night We could have tried a myriad of food options But we went for the chicken pad ties Just to remind ourselves how bloody good it is Now get this form

Get this form Gotcha We order two pad tyres Yep The woman asks us Do you want it mild, medium or hot? I went mild because I'm white

Yeah yeah So he goes mild And he walks away And gets us a table I went hot And join him later and when we were having the patty, I couldn't finish mine. It was so big.

It was delicious, by the way, at Little High. I said to Fletcher, do you want to finish mine? My pad tie was too spicy for our boy. Oh, I got really, I had to drink water. Can we go get an ice cream? He's not spice. We had to get an ice cream. We had to get an ice cream.

Yeah. Had to get an ice cream. Had to. And the other part that I absolutely loved was they gave us our meals and they came with knives and forks. And I said, oh, I said, can you go get some chopsticks? And he comes back and he just has one set just for me. Well, no, because the noodles.

I don't like the noodles with the chopsticks. He forked his. Yeah, I forked mine. What do you mean? You know, like the noodles of the chopsticks? What do you eat with chopsticks? His mild pad tie got whiter and whiter the whole night. I'll tell you.

Well, we asked this question, and there's an overwhelming winner. 82% of people said butter chicken is the more basic bitch meal to order than pad toy. Yum. Yum, yeah, yeah. It's yum. You get another curry, but you don't go without a butter chicken. Yeah. Lucinda said Neither a basic bitch would have beans on toast and stay home.

That's true. That's a delicious meal too. Is it still basic bitch if it's butter panir? Yes. Yes, you're just a vegetarian white bitch. What is this? Panera's of the cheese family. Yeah, like a hulumi-ish. Yeah. Hannah said, it's me. I'm the basic bitch.

Could really go about a chicken right now. Yeah, yum. I like to think last night we made people get butter chickens. Yeah, I think so. And pad ties. nationwide. Sophie said pad tie because I myself am a basic bitch and that's my order.

But also, where does sweet and sale pork sit on the menu? Yeah, that's why it is. That could have been the third option. Sweet and sour pork's very white. But if you get like a... Lemon chicken. No. Lemon chicken's whiter.

I reckon people are a bit scared of a lemon chicken. You reckon because it's not sweet and sour pork. Actually, my mum will go a lemon chicken, so you're right. That is about as white as meals get. Yeah. Because God forbid there should be any coriander or flavour. on that thing. Ambley said, I've never had a pad tie, so it has to be a butter chicken for me.

Oh my God, you've never had one. They're delicious. They're really good. Somebody else said, Nikki said, I made both recently for my niece and nephew. Pad tie was the favourite with those. But it's harder to make than a butter chicken. Is it? Yeah.

A little bit of pad tie would have been easy to make than a butter chicken. A little bit more to it. The most basis of bitches, said Hannah, and I've never had a pad tie in my life. Oh, you've simply masked. She would go for a sate stir fry, no doubt. Oh, I don't know about that. Peanuts are a foreign... Just some curry puffs and money beans.

Yeah, true. Peak, basic, as I order, and I whisper, mild, please. While I order either of these, is that my go-to. There's a certain shame when you say mild, eh, that you feel. It's the exact opposite end of the spectrum of when I go and I order Indian or Thai food and I say hot. And they look at me and they go hot. And I'm like, yeah, hot. Hot.

And they're like, sir, respect. Yeah. You don't expect it from this pasty, fracly, white-hand. I think when it gets to the point where I'm not enjoying it, I'm just having hot. Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm out. No, no, no, no, you're out, you're out. Totally.

So, for silly little poll, we asked, which is the more basic bitch meal to order? And 82% he said it's got to be but a chicken. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley. Before we flew to crush it yesterday, we ran into at the airport, uh, comedy legend and voice of the pack and save ads. Paul Eager. ego. Hard to miss. Tell you what,

in the Kodoo Lounge. You're like, eight foot tall? Yeah, yeah. We said, come join us. We're having a good yarn and he was like, how's radio? Because famously, he was doing radio for a little bit, and then no longer was required. That's going to happen to all of us

one day, Harley. That's a nice way putting it. Oh, we love our Pooley. You know our excess to requirement. Excess to requirements. But you know what, Paul's so funny, and he's just like constantly on. And we were doing prep for the show. in the lounge with him. And he just starts, because he's got no place for these ideas,

he's radiant gold. And he was, you know, spinning yarns and stuff with us. And he was just saying, you know, we've been in Europe. And he's going on a big trip. And we said, where are you going? And he was telling us his little journey with his far-known stuff and where they're going to go. And he said, we were going to go to Germany,

him and his wife, to go and stay with their old neighbours, who they were good friends with. And Elveneva Hitler. No, no, no, no. No, no, no, they had a falling out over something. Oh, okay. I can't remember what. Disagreement.

Dinner got real heated one night and they don't talk anymore. No, but they were going to go and visit their old neighbours in Germany. They were going to stay with them for like three or four nights. Yeah, staying with them and they'd booked flights and a train and all this kind of stuff from where they were going. And then Paul sent the friend the message being like, looking forward to it. And the friend just messages back and says, actually, you might want to hold off on this because we've broken up. him and his wife. So now, it kind of worked in Paul and his wife's favour

because they had somewhere else they could have gone. And so they just did this, but they had to change flights and plans and cancel this and shuffle this around. We're having a good laugh. And then Paul just said to us, great break for radio. And we said, we'll take that. And this is what we want to ask this morning. On the back of that story, when did someone else's breakup ruin your plans?

Your plans? Like maybe you had a couple's holiday or you had some. something planned but then there was a drama with the breakup and you had to be there for your friend. I had this with a group of my friends, you know, young in their 20s, couldn't afford it to buy a house so they all got together

and bought a house as a big friend group, a big house. And then all the couples just started bloody separating and breaking up and it was like, so what percentage of this and all the whole thing crumbled? So everyone had to get their money out because everyone's breakups were making it a lot harder than it needed to be. Who thought that would be

a great idea of buying a house like Four couple, three couples? How many couples? It was like a few singles and some couple. It was a mess. Oh no, that's a mess. I've got to tell it was a mess. Yeah, okay.

But yeah, maybe it put a kibosh on your holiday plans or a purchase or maybe just their breakup. Got in the way and ruined your plans. Or it could be ruined your life. Like Libby said, my parents break up ruined my plans of being a part of a big happy family. Oh, that's. 421 said my parents break up ruined my plans to have a nice childhood, with nice childhood memories and stable. mental health going on. Okay, people are funny. That's very funny, but it's dark. It's funny,

but it's really dark. And if you want us to do a phone and topic, how did your parents' divorce impact you? Yeah. We can maybe hold off on that for a little. Sounds like we need some therapy there too. Should we get Virginia in? You know, my therapist. You get Virginia into how many... I think she's got a big enough plate to deal with you alone. She probably isn't there. The list is on board as well. She's like, good Lord. The love of my life took 18 months to break up with his girlfriend of the time. very inconvenient for me. So it was actually how long the

breakup took ruined their plans. Oh, right. Okay. Emily messages in if you would like the opposite side of the coin, my parents staying together ruined my childhood. So, we're not asking about how your... Yeah. It was friends. Yeah, so like, you know, when did some of your friends or your mates?

Went to stay... Brackup impact you. I went to stay with my boyfriend at the time's childhood friended his flat in London. He and his girlfriend broke up just before we arrived. She... She fled to Mandate. We stayed one or two nights before she decided she wanted to come back, but didn't want us there. So we got tossed out with nowhere to say as he tried to mend the breakup that had happened.

Oh, that's especially accommodation in London. It's not cheap. I have friends in London that, this is a years ago, but they broke up. But the accommodation in London is so expensive and so hard to find. They just had to keep living together. And it was the same thing. They started having like people over, like people over. And had to be like, well, it's my night in the bedroom.

Oh, God. The other one was on the couch? Yeah, dude. Oh, okay. It's London, darling. It's hard. And there's a South African living in the cupboard and a couple of Aussies in the hallway.

It's very hard. Katrina said I'd like to message in on behalf of my parents. My breakup ruined my parents' trip to Europe because they cancelled their trip to look after me and the kids. That's good parents. Oh. Oh, so they were going to be going to Europe, but they cancelled. Yeah, to stay hard.

I'm sorry. I'll just zoom in, to be honest. I'll zoom in with a couple of are you doing alright? Because I'm crying and you're like, okay, hold on, hold on just a minute, Vaughn. Yeah, two my ties, please. Dude, you know, last year when I was going through my breakup, my parents were over in Europe as life was falling apart. And Patsy did consider getting on a plane.

Would have absolutely ruined her trip. But then she was like, you're all right, grow up, you're 35. Yeah, exactly. You're a growing woman every day. Deal with it. I had a plan of developing a lovely close relationship with my grandfather's second wife but he's an asshole and he divorced her when I was 20

that woman was more of a grandparent than he ever was and now she lives in Australia and I don't get to see her and I'm stuck in New Zealand with this prick. I sort of feel like we're just getting messages about how divorce is sort of pulled apart families it's sort of not the fun playful line that I thought she feels a bit like that It was gonna be divorce really

We're going away as a group two couples Her name was on the rental car And they brought up they will not give the car if it's not the driver. Yeah, and they broke up, we got there and thought of the sweat as because we had the booking number, they would not give it to us because it wasn't, I know, we had to, we'd already paid for it, we had to pay again.

I was going to say it to walk around everywhere, you know, 35-hour walks. Yeah, yeah. My breakup ruined my parents' life as he was their handyman and was slowly doing up their house for free. Oh, this would be classic. My best friend broke up with her boyfriend right after our wedding, and I tell you what he features a lot in all our wedding photos.

If you are taking someone to a wedding but a break-ups on the horizon, I'd say opt for a few photos without them, be like, just like... One way. ...the school group. Wait, you can't be all in a photo and then say, Daryl, just sand to the sign.

No, but it's not Daryl, it's only... It's all everybody's partners get out just for that photo. And that's like... Similar vibe. Made of Honour and Best Man were a couple for over two years of both in our wedding party. They broke up just a few months before our wedding.

They told us they're going to be... fine. They both still wanted to be there for us. It's absolutely fine. They made the whole thing so awkward. Oh, God. So I'm a divorce lawyer. Everybody's breakup ruins my day. Does it? No, it does. $400 an hour, does it?

Yeah, shut up. Does it really? I think you'll be right. Yeah, I reckon. You're out your tears with one of those $50 notes. The Z&M Podcast Network. ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley. Fact of the day, day, day, day.

Day It's factoid week It's I do do do Do do do Do do do Do do Do do do do do

Do do do do do do do Do do do do do do It's a real We're taking things That you maybe have Repeated yourself As fact That aren't actually facts

And today is that The Great Wall of China Is visible from space Because it's not Yeah, that's a common one Isn't it? That's a real common one I just actually watched

I don't know My algorithm's been chucking me some curveballs lately and I tell you what if I can get back to some brown skin light eyes ASAP plays Instagram that'd be great oh yeah my algorithm's gone all cooked as well but it's just removing ingrown hairs I think I've done it to myself I've watched about four in a row yeah I'm a fan of those this is curly mine went to football because of the FIFA world come oh only because of the game itself the artful game he loves the game it takes 80 minutes to not score a single goal 90 minutes 90 minutes

And let's face it There's going to be another 15 to 20 minutes of overtime Extra time No, I watch this guy And he's going to all seven wonders of the world Without taking a plane That's his whole... How's he doing that?

The boats and trains and cars and stuff But no planes, never gets on a plane. Okay And he camped overnight illegally On a like forbidden, closed off Part of the Great Wall of China Oh, I don't know if I'd be doing that I wouldn't know.

There's a few numbers. nations I wouldn't tango with. I reckon China would probably be right up there with, you know, Iran maybe. I'd been in a great hurry to tango. I wouldn't even dilly, deli in America, to be fair. Certainly right up there now, eh? I wouldn't dilly deli in America anyway. But yeah, he was like climbing up and the collapse parts are like wall climbing,

but it's all breaking under him. And I can see whether they've shut it off because it'll be toast. But anyway, it's not, you can't see it from space. Apollo 12's Alan Bean said from the moon, all you can really see is... Mr. Bean. Mr. Bean, yeah. Mr. Bean's been on the moon. This way he doesn't speak now that he got back to Earth.

He brought himself a humble... He took his... Him and Teddy went aboard the little green mini to the moon. Yeah, yeah, yeah, three wheels. And he gets back and he's like, there's not a lot to say really now that I'm back. He said the only thing he can actually see from the moon is a beautiful sphere that seems mostly white, some blue and some patches of yellow. And so obviously nothing... The moon's significantly further away than what is constituted as space.

But you can't see... Because there's a line, right? People have taken a photo, but there's still in our... Well, technically, Katie Perry went to space. Technically. But she went through the line. She went up and then straight back down. So this, actually, the origins of this,

older than spaceflight itself, the earliest version from 1754, an English explorer William Stucle. See that the Great Wall of China may be discerned, at the moon. And so everyone's like, oh, wow, you can see it from the moon. And then it just kind of like spread from there. What a thing to say in the 1700s when you're not that high? Yeah, you don't even know, you don't know shit, bro. You don't know what the way opium

was cruising around, you could have been pretty high in the 1700s. Yeah. We literally, you can't just pour with a sidestep. Yesterday we're walking around beautiful Garden City, that is Christchurch, and that beautiful florals, there were some poppies there. And the first thing, Fletch says, oh, we can make opium. I think that's a great plan for you. Well, no, I just thought that's what people did.

It is, I don't know how. This is a, I had some family friends growing up who grew poppies, and whenever they were flowering, people would come and steal them. It has to be a specific type of poppy, and it's not easy to get the opium poppies. Almost that's a factoid in itself. I did wonder why the Crush City Council was just letting them grow there. Yeah, Willie. Or how do you think they're paying for the rebuild?

Opium. Yeah, right, okay. Getting involved in the open opium market. So you can't see the Great Wall of China. Have you guys been to the Great Wall of China? No, I've never been to, China. I'd love to. Jaina.

Never been to Jaina. I've never been to Jaina. So, apparently, under the right conditions from the edge of space, the pyramids of Giza are easier to see from space. Oh, really? That's the man-made object. Most astronauts are really surprised when they're going over, you know, very just in what is constituted as space, flying over Egypt.

They're like, oh. Oh! And it's mostly because there's a city around it, and then they're kind of plopped in the middle. It's easy to spot. But the Great Wall of China's. so thin and windy that you can't really see it from some time. It has like a sand arioli,

separating the pyramids with the city. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it does. Tiny nipples, though, if we're constituting the pyramid as the nip. Yep, the pokey out nipple part. Give you that. Huge arioli, tiny little nip. Little nib. Tiny little nip.

Sort of a Jonas Brothers nip there. If you'll grant me, no, everyone's gone quiet. Do the Jonas brothers have little nips? I didn't know this. No, I don't know if I'll fetch a small nips. Big nips. Jonas Brothers had big nips, small pot-alami nips. Yeah.

Dix. Yeah. Pepperoni discs. Big area, reality, tiny nipple itself. So today's factoid of the day is that the Great Wall of China is visible from space, because it ain't. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day, day, day. Ah, do-d-d-d-d-d-d-dud-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-t do. Play ZM's Flesh, Forne and Haley.

Okay, so based on what age you are, your generation that you're in, apparently each generation has a style ick that the other generations are like, that is cringe. Well, we talked about Vaughn's Jorts, didn't we? Earlier this week. You're a millennial. No, no, no, you're good. The Jorts aren't, it's number one.

They've named the top one. Jorts will be in there. Okay. But it's not number one. The top ick for each generation. Yeah, yeah. So let's start with your. boomers because we love our boomers.

You know what I mean? And those are the good old days that Paul Henry wants to get us back to. It's kind of less of a fashion one, but heavy use of cologne and perfume. I literally just put perfume on. So this is not people find the cringes about boomers. About that generation. So for boomers, I'd say

fashion style, where you present yourself is that heavy, thick Elizabeth Arden, Reddor. Yeah, dude. Reddaw doesn't muck around there. Reddell sticks and stinks. It sticks and it stings. And the men with those heavy, old spicy kind of things. For the boomers, that's the thing you're looking at for.

We actually don't really care how you dress. You know what I mean? You just be comfortable. Nice long cardigan. Don't get a draft on your back. Yeah. Okay, next generation is Gen X. It is wearing, oh no.

The Dad shirts, a practical, unfashionable shirt. So it's not nicely tailored. It doesn't have an interesting collar. Would it be a Hawaiian shirt? Probably a Gen X Hawaiian shirt would be in there. Just a dad's shirt that's got absolutely no structure in it. It's not doing anything for anyone.

That's your generational fashion ick. Millennials, we're in here. I'm trying to think what the number one. If you've listened to the podcast, Sex. Life, you'll know what the biggest fashion ick is for millennials. What do you think it is, producer Shannon, as a Gen Z? It's the socket. It's the socket, babes.

I stopped the socket when they became uncool. You still rocking a socket there, Vaughney, with your loafers? I do have a socket, actually. I actually threw my sockets out, and I have long socks. And do you know what? Recently traveling in summer, it was very, very hot. It was really hot, and you sort of swale around the ankle a bit as well. A socket would be perfect here.

It's the no-show sock. They're saying it's our signature style, and it's under three. What about the sock that shows but stays low? Ankle sock. You're like an ankle sock. Is that of the sock yet family? Ankle sock is better than a sock yet, but she's on the fence. We're long, we're back to long socks.

I'm sorry. We're a crew. We're a crew sock. We're a crew generation now. And please follow accordingly. And Gen Z, your one is the low slung, wide knee gene. Just like, again, it's doing nothing for you. The baggy gene that we wore in the 90s.

we wore in the 90s and even then it looked bad. We look back at photos and we go, oh my gosh. Yeah, and you'll look back too, Gen Z and think, God, I look terrible there. Not now, but soon. It's not going to last because very soon you're going to develop what we all developed. It's called a muffin top. And that real quick, really quickly.

That'll push it out, eh? It puts a stop to those low slung jeans for sure. Yeah. Yuck. The ZN Podcast Network. Play ZN's Fletchhorn and Hake. You're on ZM and it's Friday and it's after nine so that technically means it's Friday jams. Good morning. Vaughan in Auckland studio, Fletch and Haley are making their way downtown, faces past and their homebound.

To give away tickets to Fletch Fulch on and Haley live in Christchurch, outside the Christchurch town hall. And they join us now via technology apparently called a tie line. Good morning. Well, we just, can you hear us? Yes, we can hear loud and clear, Clem Fandanga. Okay, because what we've done is we've got Fletcher's. air pods in but we've got one each like a cute couple but we don't know which

one's got the microphone you talk flet as I'm talking now in your opinion a shared air pod on a scale of romance more romantic or less romantic than a shared wired air phone less romantic

about as disgusting also let's bring the raise the point that Haley last night was going to watch a movie at the same time as a man oh yes okay let's talk about that in different cities, singed up. That is the most sickening, disgusting thing I've ever been in my life. It is.

It is. Watching a TV show at the same time and not as bad because you don't want to leave each other behind, but specifically pulling out a movie and be like, press play in three, two, one, play. Can I just say I pulled out of this arrangement in lieu of some personal time with myself, if you know what I mean?

And no regrets about that decision and then I had a lovely sleep. So we'll just put that behind us. I'm picking up what you're putting down But you have also famously said that's the first thing you do when you get to a hotel room. So are we... Well, it wasn't the first one of the day home. No, yeah, good.

Good. Good. Sorry, just saying good morning to people. Someone's messaging on the text machine, whilst, are you guys wheeling something on some cobbles down there? Yes, that's my suitcase. Okay, you're wheeling a suitcase on the cobbles. Now, what are you doing with this radio break, Vaugh? Well, I was going to talk about the fact that there's been some solid research

returned on the fact that bird song therapy is really good for you, to listen to the sound of birds. And I think we... Oh my God, stop. That's such hot... We hear in Altero in New Zealand a spoil... Just feel like if we're going to turn them off, Marty, actually, if they're going to poo-poo this break.

Actually, turn them on, but put them real low. Put them real low. We hear in Altero, New Zealand, are spoiled for birds' songs. Spoilt for birds' song. And if we'll continue our pest-free by 2050 campaign, which I am fully behind, I killed two possums last weekend and three rapsums. I think our bird song will only get better or more powerful,

and we should be thankful that we're not in Australia because their birds are all just really loud and squawky. Any thoughts on that from Christchurch? Wait, is this seriously the break that you're doing? Yeah. Hot cool content for people. Go to songs, horn, go to songs. Surely you've got a Taylor Swiftline.

I've actually got Bird Song. Do you want to play Bird Song? No! Okay. No, this is your fault. You guys left me in charge. you should never have done it. The ZDN Podcast Network.

I wanted to know now, what's your niggle going into the weekend? What's your niggle? Matt Damon, star of the Odyssey and 55-year-old man who had to put on some phenomenal amount of muscle to play the role in the Odyssey of Odysseus. And that's what's called an Odyssey, because it's his journey, has said that all the middle-aged actors had sorebacks, bad feet, and generally back pain.

as well as scuffed up bits and pieces from the fighting. He's like, this isn't as easy as it was 20 years ago when I was playing Jason Bourne, or 25, 30 years ago when we were all doing action, but they needed people who were a little bit older. And he said, yeah, the back concern would turn up to set and everyone would be doing their stretches and they had a little massage to get going,

and he said they all had their little niggles. I want to know, going into the weekend. What's your niggle? Myself, elbows. Don't know what's happened? I assume it's just part of being 44 years old. The elbow niggle ever present? By the way, it started in one elbow.

now it's president both elbows. So going into the weekend, I don't know, would eat a deep heat and a prayer or two and a couple of pain-numbing whiskeys. But 9-6-96, what is your niggle? Someone's already messaged in, can't contribute to this break. Sorry, I don't currently have a niggle.

But I appreciate that you've just messaged in to let us know you can't do it. Emily, the right calf muscle. Back in the Auckland studio about what's your niggle heading into the weekend. Important to deal with the niggles as best we can. Erica is called 0800 dial Z-M. We're just going to get her up on the line.

Erica, what's your niggle? Good morning, Vourney. Good morning. Erica, E. Good morning. Yeah, welcome to Friday. Crunchy knees. You know, you get that little crunch when you bend them.

They sort of sound like sand rubbing together, a little bit of pumice in there. That sounds a little bit more than a niggle, Erica. That sounds more like a sort of a... I think it's an old person thing. But how old are we talking, Erica? You don't sound like you should be having full-blown Have you had it checked out? Is it an arthritis of sorts?

Oh no. Look, I've had a lot of work done, but I am in my 54th year. But it's alright. I think it's sort of run-of-the-mill standard. It's a little bit crunchy. A crunchy knee and a sandy sort of a sandy joint. Yeah, totally.

And then the eyelids start to droop and then you've got to put eyelashes on to cover those and it just goes on. Okay, well, that's a way we can absolutely have our existential midlife crisis meltdown off air if you'd like Erica we can have that together. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Have a great weekend. Some 9-6-96 on What's the Niggle.

Somebody else said, it really, Nick said, it's the shoulder for me. Tweet it at Isocky a few weeks back. Should probably get it checked out, but it makes me feel alive and are you really living if you don't have, you know, at least two or three niggles on the go? Jordan's pregnant. My whole body is a niggle at the moment. I tell you what you're about, you're about to have a whole world of problems

and then you're going to have to be dealing with somebody else's niggles as well going on and on forward. Left knees the niggle going into the weekend for me. I've had a four day long headache. It says 664. I'll give a headache. I'll give a headache a few hours and a couple of Pantanol if it's still persisting,

I will probably see a physician and I'd recommend on day four probably best to try to get one of those booked in. And or go, work out what the quietest time is to go to an A&E. On a weekend, it's never when kids are playing. sports because they're clumsy and they're really like hurting themselves.

Syatica listed is a niggle for 142. Siatica, if you know what it's called, it's not a niggle, it's more of a problem. But 9-6-96, we're continuing to take your niggles heading into the weekend. We're talking niggles going into the weekend. What are you carrying? What are you carrying into the weekend? Someone said, I had a deer head on at 100 kilometres an hour. And while the medical system is called it a minor collision, I'm finding out this soon

whether or not if I have a broken neck, pelvis or spine and why I've got no balance. Again, I wouldn't cost slightly more than a niggle. Just twist of my chain, twist of my ankle, chaining down the load on my truck, so I guess they have to carry that into the weekend. Yeah, once you're over 30, the old ankle twist does keep you awake at night

and remind you every morning when you get out of bed. Also, a few reports of people having sandy knees. Sandy knees, there'll be something for that at Chemis Warehouse, bundle of joys back at Chemis Warehouse, in store only, T's and C's Apply. Shivers, guys, 10 out of 10 podcast, that one? Yeah. I think two of us were 10 out of 10 and one of us wasn't.

Or who was that? Which one? We'll just leave that. We'll just leave that there. Well, if you enjoyed today's podcast, give us a rating and review. Please do. Unless it's a bad one. Oh, yeah, don't.

Don't bother. Yeah, no, don't. Don't bother. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.