ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 24th of February, 2025

Episode Date: February 23, 2025

Birks in court - They're not art Dating apps making women get more cosmetic surgery SLP - Do you have a signature scent? Bridget Jones movie review Top 6 things named after America that we can change Heartbreaking angler fish update Millenial News - The side part is back What's ya jobby? What flew into your mouth? Hayley shaving conundrum Road patrol chat - August starting Fact of the Day Were you are your partner an enemies to lovers romance?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years in the 1970s, the Mr. Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of plague. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Clark would have threatened him. Go and kill him. If you don't, I'm going to kill you and your wife and your son. This is Mr. Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your son. This is Mr. Asia, a forgotten history. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. From the ZM Podcast Network, this is Fletch, Fawn and Hayley's Big Pod. Thanks to Animates, making happy happen for pets. It's ZM's Fletch, Fawn and Hayley.

Thanks, Bryn. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Happy Monday. Happy Monday. Happy to be here. Do you know you guys are on your own tomorrow? Yeah. Boys' day, boys' day. Big day tomorrow.

Huge operation. We'll discuss this on the show today. I know you've got a couple of issues. Got a couple of issues downstairs, some downstairs issues. That you want to raise. I know. And then a question that I know at least Va a couple of issues. Got a couple of issues downstairs, some downstairs issues. That you want to raise. I know, and then a question that I know at least one can relate to, so we'll see. Top six on the way.

Yes, the top six things named after America that we can now change because Canadians, they're really taking this quite well, I think. This whole Donald Trump wanting them to be the 51st state and all of this weird shit going on with their neighbour downstairs. They beat them in ice hockey at the weekend

and like just erupted. Yeah. That was good stuff. Good stuff. So, they were changing the name of the Americano in Canada to the Canadian-cado.

I'm not sure even I know how to say it. Canadian-cado. The Canadian-cado. I'll have a Campuchino and a Canadian-cado. Canadian-cado. Canadian-cado. The Canadian Carto. I'll have a cappuccino and a Canadian Carto. Canadian Carto. Canadian Carto.

Yeah. Yeah, so I've got the top six other things named after America that we can probably change now too. Secret sound coming up this morning. All thanks to Super Liquor, we've got a jackpot of $20,000. See, that's Norse. Yeah, that's Norse. That's Norse.

This is some serious amount of cash. You've just got to identify the sound. That's it. And you win the cash. 7 o' You've just got to identify the sound. That's it. And you win the cash. 7 o'clock and 8 this morning on the show. That's it. Next on the show, we want to talk about imitation Birks. Birkenstocks.

We're a big Birk crew here. Oh, we love our Birks. We just said we love our Birks And then we just sat And then we enjoyed the fact That we were all wearing them right now Oh Han I'm in the truck today Oh

I'm sorry to hear that Right well there's been some issues Mine are cooked on the bottom I just saw them Because I kicked them off Yeah mine are nearly done Oh Han That's a repeat

You've got a cobbler No You've got to get new ones That's gone mate I'll give you the link to my cobbler Han Nah because I think it's gone at the back here You've got a cobbler. No, you've got to get new ones. That's gone, mate. I'll give you the link to my cobbler horn. No, because I think it's gone at the back here. We've got a real lenient situation. How does that lean it?

What do you scuff your feet or something at the back? I walk on anti-tip toes. I walk on... Heels, toes up. The heel just is like at a 45 degree angle. Yeah. I don't know, man. And Burke and Stock have an issue with all the imitation Burks. I bet they do. I don't know, man. Well, there's, and Birkenstock have an issue

with all the imitation Birks. I bet they do. And it's gone to court. We're going to talk about this next. Play ZM's Flashborn and Hayley. A German court has ruled that Birkenstocks, which I didn't know

have been around since 1744. Yeah, didn't they, was it last year, their 250th? Yeah, that's right. Is that what it was? I thought that's right. There were billboards. Something like that with some massive birthday. I think we even talked about it. year, their 250th? Yeah, that's right. Is that what it was? I thought that's right. They were billboards.

Some massive birthday. I think we even talked about it. Like what? 250 years? Yes. Well, they have been wanting to stop compycats selling their Birkenstocks. I've got the hiccups. Oh, don't.

I've got the hiccups. Baba. Oh, no, it's okay. They'll go away. Little burpees. Little cat on the back. Little burpees. So, Birkenstocks have been wanting to stop the copycats,

which are buying everywhere. My first ever Birks were fake. Yeah, and like came out the way everyone's selling them, right? Yeah, totally. And from a distance, you're like, Birks. And then you're like, oh, no. The only thing is that fake Birks that are not made of real leather, they stink.

Do you know what I mean? After like a hot summer in a pair of non-cork, non-leather. Right. They get a bit stank. In Germany, they went to court because they wanted to stop these companies selling the rip-offs. And so they wanted the strongest protection possible.

So they put to the court that Birkenstocks are a work of art. Oh, so it can't be copyrighted? So it can't be... It can't be copied. Can't be copied. Because that will give you the highest level of copyright protection. But a court has ruled that Birkenstocks are not a work of art.

We'll tell that to my feet during summer. Because they sure feel like a work of art. When they mould to the pork. Oh, yeah. Oh, that was the thing. So my mum's been staying for the weekend. And we both have the same size feet and white Birkenstocks. And so they've been out to the pork. Oh, yeah. Oh, that was the thing. So my mum's been staying for the weekend, and we both have the same size feet and white Birkenstocks. So they've been out on the deck.

So every time I go outside and try to slip them on, the moment you slip into a Patsy Birk, you feel it immediately. Oh, she's got a different. Well off. It's off. It hasn't moulded to your feet, has it? No. Oh, my God.

So I'd say they're a work of art. I'm trying to find a photo of the very first Birkenstock, but they didn't have... Because they kind of look the same, right? They didn't have Instagram 250 years ago, so I don't know where to look. I think they're fairly similar. Kind of stops.

Yeah. It's sort of based on the Jesus sandal, isn't it? Jesus wore a lovely strappy pair. Did Jesus wear a Roman? No, they were the Romans strung up, right? He had school Roman sandals. No, the Romans were the ones that got him. Pontius Pilate.

Oh, okay. I know this. I've been brushing up on my religion because we're about to lose a pope. Oh, of course. Yeah, that's going to be bloody all in the news, isn't it? Old smoke out the chimney. Huge news. We'll actually be flying to the Vatican to do the show live.

Yeah. Because who better to report on the new Pope than a lad's Catholic, a lifelong heathen and an Anglican schoolgirl? Presbyterian schoolgirl. But previous Satanist got off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've got it all here on the show. We're covering all angles.

We represent the people. Yeah. We just basically want to side trip to Rome. We just basically want a side trip to Rome. We just basically want a side trip to Rome. If we have pasta while we're there, what else are we supposed to eat? Yes. And of course,

we will have to drink red wine. From a carafe, darling. As to not offend the locals. Of course. And their bespoke traditions. Yeah, bringing you the latest from Vatican City. Yeah. When the Pope does pass.

Probably wear some burkies too. Yeah, we'll be on the ground. If we get the trip, I'll probably get a, probably shout myself a pair of burkies too if we get the trip I'll probably get a probably shout myself a pair of burkies and break them in on the plane

work's gonna have to fly us business class this is a work trip and it's longer than 12 hours that's right and we're actually and that's what

our contracts say we're a tall show as well do you know what I mean where are all these legs going need the leg room yeah we need it

and of course I'll be in mourning because of the Pope you won't want to talk about it whose name is and I'll need a nice outfit do you Because of the Pope. You won't want to talk about it. Whose name is... And I'll need a nice outfit. Yeah.

Do you know what I mean? As the woman. Yes. I'm going to have to look. If they send my costume, I'm going to be livid. Oh, I will be... He's not even Catholic. He's not even Catholic.

Neither is he. Well, you're a cataholic. You guys both really like cats. So you can probably give them a... We're Catholic. Wait, what's happening? Because all we saw was cataholics. We've got a Catholic and a couple of Catholics.

Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. Psychological researchers, I guess, are pushing for dating apps to implement more, encouraging people to present themselves more authentically and do more personality-based matching rather than the photo base because it's all about the photos. You know what I mean? Do you want the hot guy or not? I want the hot guy.

But he has to have a heart of gold, you know? And that's what I should be focusing on. Ideally, he has some. Do you know what I mean? Ideally, he has a bit at least. And, well, they're saying this because apparently there's been a huge rise in this sort of positive attitude and acceptance of cosmetic procedures in women who you particularly women who use dating apps because it's so image focused and that people are on these apps just like social

media presenting themselves inauthentically with just the best angles and the best lighting and the best filters and all this kind of stuff. And it makes them more sort of prone to accept and want things like dermal fillers and Botox and cosmetic surgery. And they're seeing a huge increase in people going, I'm going to do this. I'm going to make myself look tighter and brighter and lifted and everything, just from dating apps. That's sad.

I suppose it is a bit sad, isn't it? Because when we talked about this the other week or the week before about people on Zoom all the time. Oh, yeah. The same thing. When they FaceTime or they Zoom, they spend however percent, the majority of time looking at themselves.

Yeah. And then they're like, well, I don't feel good. I'm going to need some Botox or I'm going to need some fillers or. That was a post-pandemic, eh? It was like we just spent so much time looking at ourselves in Zoom windows and then we see things that we didn't notice

because we don't... You see yourself in the mirror in the morning in the mirror when you go for wee-wees. And that's it. And that's sort of it. And then we start picking ourselves apart. Well, it's the same with dating apps. People are just going,

oh God, look at all these beautiful women on here. I'm going to have to do a little bit extra. How much does it all, like, cost? Cosmetic work. Yeah. It depends where you go. Like, what does a filler cost? I don't know.

When you're in the market. Hundreds. No, I was just wondering about, like, the industry. You do have really, really thin lips. You know what I mean? And I just feel like if you just had more of a natural pouch, that'd be really cute I like

can you imagine if you just turned up like of all people in this studio if Vaughn you turned up one day and we were just like look at me

what have you done to your lips nothing I love when people deny it it's like well we can all see do you remember

when Kylie Jenner for like months was like, I haven't done anything. We were like, you have a different face. Yeah. It's fine. You're very beautiful. It's just different. But don't lie.

It's just different. So did you see that news story as well? California are looking to ban. Oh my God, yes. I don't understand what any of this stuff is. Retinol. Retinol products with anti-aging and retinol in them. Not for everybody, but for under 18s.

Because, I mean, how many times have you got to scream it from the rooftop? They don't need it. Put sunblock on. Yeah, yeah. Put sunblock on. Like it's just, it's so good. And it's actually really harmful to your skin when you're that young. You don't need it.

It's not doing anything. Because doesn't it burn a layer off? It burns, yeah, yeah. Yeah, right. And if you use retinol like too many days it. It's not doing anything. Doesn't it burn a layer off? It burns, yeah, yeah. Yeah, right. And if you use retinol like too many days in a row, I'll get a retinol burn, and then you take a little break. Yeah.

Are you using the retinol? Yeah, of course. That's why it's so beautiful. But I started quite late using retinol. Right. What, last week? But how does it work? Excuse me?

Does it come in a pot? Call me a hag. In a tube, and you just smear it on and leave it? No, it'll be within product. So it'll be within a cream or a serum or an oil. And you just leave it on? Yeah. And it burns through?

Retinol can be good for your skin, but if you overdo it, yeah, it's quite an aggressive product. That's why on young skin it doesn't need it at all. Young people are so obsessed with skincare. They just need your little moisturisers and a bit of body glitter like we used to have

in the 90s. Just put a bit of body glitter. Some nice crispy hard abrasive glitter in there and you'll be fine, hon. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Silly little polis, do you have a signature scent? It's an interesting thing because I was reading an article about how to choose a signature scent. Yeah.

And then I was like, I don't know if I've got one because I've got like three perfumes that sort of rotate on mood. It might be an amalgamation of the three. But also, I took this as more of a, it didn't have to be a perfume. You know how some people, like my nana's house always smelled like exactly the same laundry powder. Oh yeah, she was cold water surf. She was a cold water surf gal. Yeah, she was, yeah. And she, you know, she washed the clothes. So I always like, and my parents' house has a smell that I grew up with.

So I was used to it. But now when I go back and see them, I can smell the house. They're a white family. It smells like potatoes. It's disgusting. They'll never get it out of the walls. Potatoes and bananas. They're not getting their porn back.

Yeah. I think I've got three. I've got my Nivea body spray. That's your day-to-day smell. That's my day-to-day smell. Which is very neutral. And people often say, what are you wearing? I'm like, just Nivea.

Just deodorant. Just a bit of deodorant. Just showering and deodorant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I've got my Eros. Just deodorant. Just a bit of deodorant. Just showering in deodorant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I've got my Eros, whatever it's called. Eros Versace. Versace, the red one. Yeah.

And then I've got the other one, which is whenever I'm through an airport, I'm Tom Ford. Yeah. Oh, because we can't afford it. Because it's free. Because it's free. I'm Tom Ford at the testers. Oh, my God. Same.

I Tom Ford so hard when I go to the airport. I would never buy it. I was in an airport at the weekend. I was like, Tom Ford? Yeah. I definitely had a airport I would never buy it I was in an airport at the weekend I was like Tom Ford I definitely had a signature scent but then I got another one so I mixed it up

but a lot of people like my mum Samsara she's always wore this Samsara perfume anytime I smell it it's my mum sometimes I think about

I'm going to buy a couple of bottles in preparation for her dying so I can sniff her my mum's was Elizabeth Arden Red Door of course it is classic

my nan's is White Diamonds Of course it is. And my nan's is White Diamonds. Of course it is. Do you think that fragrance companies like they've stuck with these forever because if they ever got rid of a... Red Door or a... Yeah, people would just absolutely get up in arms. They'll phase them out eventually, but it'll be

a while. Yeah. Yeah, totally. Yeah, they've got their like you know, key ones that they'll just have forever. What is the number one best selling perfume in the world? Chanel number five? Number one best selling Calvin Klein one. Or Ralph Lauren Polo?

Do you know what I mean? Like that's always... The nine most popular perfumes in the world. It's gotta be Chanel number five. Okay, this is from this year from France to Japan. Oh no, this is just in different countries. No's got to be Chanel No. 5. Okay, this is from this year, from France to Japan. Oh, no, this is just in different countries. No, I don't want to know worldwide. What is...

Jo Malone. Ord and Bergamot rich extract cologne in the UK. Yeah, that's the dupe I bought. Oh, did you buy a dupe of that, did you? Yeah, not for me. A bit floral. Oh, really? Yeah.

All right. Did you buy it without trying it? Yeah, I bought it based on the popularity of it. Oh, right, okay. And then I was like, oh, yeah. You should have just gone into a store, like gone into Farmer's. No, I bought it based on the popularity of it. Oh, right, okay. And then I was like, oh yeah. You should have just gone into a store,

like gone into Farmer's, darling. No, I didn't go into Farmer's, darling. I'm going to chat GPT for what's the best. When I type in a hurry, I make so many mistakes.

I'm not feeling something. And even if you're just slow down, what do you mean? You're like a deer learning to walk, just sort of stumbling along.

Best selling in the world is Chanel No. 5. It has held this title for decades with its iconic floral aldehyde, not from aldehyde, floral aldehyde scent and luxurious reputation. It's just a classic that's been around. It's very classy. Yes.

Well, let's see what the people said, shall we? Dior Sauvage is second. Giorgio Armani, Accior Sauvage is second. Giorgio Armani, Accra de Gio is fourth. Yves Saint Laurent Black Opium is fourth. And L'Homme, Le Vel de Dispel is fifth. And I think you'll find all that pronunciation. I actually think you've nailed that. Gorgeous.

Danny said, does my natural mask count? Wait, we haven't even done that. Have we done that? Oh, we haven't done the percentages. Oh, yeah, we need to do that. 46% of people have a signature scent. 54% of people don't have a signature scent. They'll just float.

They'll flop us. Or they just don't use fragrances. Do Cool Charm one day, Impulse the next, Lynx Africa one day. Oh, Lynx Africa. Keep them on their toes. Does my natural musks count? Says Danny.

Yes, Danny. Yeah, that's us. That's your scent. The female natural musk will attract a male. Wafty. Warm and wafty. Perfumes aren Yeah, that's your scent. The female natural musk will attract a male. Wafty. Warm and wafty. Perfumes aren't my passion, says Lauren. I found a perfume I like the smell of when I was in secondary school

and I pledge allegiance to its flag. Thank goodness they still make it. Going to have to go sniffing for a match in a perfume shop when they stop. But doesn't tell us what it is. What the hell? Why would you withhold that information? Doesn't tell us what the perfume is. I reckon if it was in high school, it's J-Lo Glow.

Yup. What a smell. God, it's soapy. I wish I did, said Steph. Unfortunately, my body changes the smell of most fragrances and I end up smelling like bug spray. Oh, your pheromones. Remember when we got the plain base for the perfume

and I put it on, nothing. Hayley, you put it on, a little something. Fletch put it on it was just like we had sex with her yeah we did we had sniff sex with her yeah we were like

I don't know what's happening but here we go it really made me irresistible in fact they should sell me at Chemist Warehouse I'd be behind the locked Fletch's pheromones

yeah yeah people would go absolutely wild they'd actually need to put the security guy Next to me Right

Next to my bottle And no tester A separate one No I wouldn't have a tester No I wouldn't need a tester No because people would steal the tester People would start making love in the store It's inappropriate

Yeah I'd be the number one selling fragrance Within a year Love potion number nine That's right Anna said I bought mine years ago Loved it

And I'm too scared to try a new one Just keep buying the same one Over and over and over But doesn't tell us what it is again. For God's sake, guys. Tell us. That's right. Keep your secrets.

Just whatever's on sale at Chemist Warehouse. Yeah, good. Show sponsor. Great listener. Show sponsor. Fantastic. That's a KPI hit by Pretty K. In fact, Pretty K, you can't spell KPI without Pretty K.

Actually, you can't. Fantastic. Pretty P-R-E-E-T-I space K. It's all in there. It's all in there. With a couple of E's and a T to spare. Oh my God.

Just whatever on sale at Chemist Warehouse when I'm in need of more. Thanks Pretty for having us hit a beautiful KPI on that one.

I've clicked the wrong button and I've lost all the responses. Nikki says as a proud homosexual I must confess that impulse is my signature scent.

And people say what are you wearing? And I say, Christian Dior. Yeah, great. Amazing. Casey said, I voted no

only because I have three signature scents. Depends on my mood and how sassy and flirty am I feeling that morning. Victoria just found the one that

even I can smell on me hours later and that's the one I went for. But again, Victoria keeping her secret is not telling us what it is.

Yep. Gatekeepers. By the fireplace by Maison Margiela. Smells like standing next to a big bonfire. Only having one takes the stress out of trying to choose a scent each day. But what kind of bonfire? One with a bit of plastic accidentally in it? Yeah, with some tyres on to get it going.

A light blue flame. What was that? By the fireplace. Bit of petrol to get it started. Maison Margiela is very fancy. Is it? You buy it at Mecca. It's really started. Maison Margiela is very fancy. Is it? You buy it at Mecca. It's really nice.

But when I've been near a bonfire and I come home, I'm like, God, my stuff stinks. Yeah, my hair stinks. Need a wash. Yeah, my clothes stink. Kat said, I have over 50 perfumes. I could never just choose one. Goodness me.

Wow. 50. I wonder how she picks. Now, we're not buying another one until you've finished all of these. Yeah, that's right. What are we calling it? Pan. Well, not the pan. another one until you've finished all of these. Yeah, that's right. What are we calling it? Pan. Well, not pan.

We're hitting pan. We're hitting pan. Kind of. Hitting pan. Hitting glass. You know, you're out when you've got to tilt the bottle so that the little tube bit dips in the right bit. Yeah, that's right. Then you can buy a new one.

We're hitting tilt. That's when you're out. We're hitting tip. Hitting tip. Tip is we're dipping the tip. Hitting tilt. We're tilt. Hitting tilt. Tilting the're dipping the tip. Hitting tilt. We're tilting the bottle. Yeah.

Yeah. That's a little poem. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Let's talk about the new Bridget Jones movie. And, Carwen, you also saw it over the weekend. Yes. Oh, my gosh.

Let's digest. Because we're both book girlies. I read the books years and years and years ago when I was like a teenager, I think. Are they books? Yeah. Yeah. I thought they were movies.

It's written like a diary. Yeah, but I just thought they were movies too. You know Bridget Jones' diary? What's that? It's a diary. No, I think the book kind of did diaries. We don't need a Bridget Jones. It's in tone, slightly different to Anne Frank's diary.

Different diary. Yeah, but if Colin Firth had been there, to Anne Frank's... He would have been like... He would have... Actually, it would have been a terribly boring movie. Yeah, actually. And really sad.

Quite sad, actually. Well, Bridget Jones is in a sad movie. Wow, is it? It was. Oh, my gosh. The first two movies are the most flawless pieces of cinema I've ever seen in my entire life. Schindler's List, you know, The Godfather,

Bridget Jones 1 and 2. Up there, up there. I just genuinely love them. You know I love Hugh Grant. I just think they're perfect films. Then the third one happened. What was the third one called? She Had a Baby.

Bridget Jones' Baby. Bridget Jones' Baby. And we all just sort of universally agreed that we'll just pretend that didn't happen. Yeah, like it was important to the plot overall, but like it was just a bit of a filler. Cinematically, yeah, we just had to fill in some plot points. And that one didn't have Hugh Grant in it.

No Hugh Grant. It had McNuggets, the guy off... Colin Firth. McFluffy off Bray's Anatomy. McDreamy. McDreamy. McDreamy. Oh, Dreamy, not Steamy. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and it was lame. Honestly, I hated it. McDreamy. McDreamy. McDreamy. Oh, dreamy, not steamy.

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it was lame. Honestly, I hated it. It was rubbish. And so I thought, I'm just going to enjoy the first two seasons of some of my favourite films, movies.

And then the third one, we'll ignore it. The fourth one came out and I was like, oh God, we're flogging a dead horse. And like, it was really implied that Hugh Grant wasn't going to be super involved in it. It was like, maybe not everyone's coming back. Yeah. And then Hugh was really implied that Hugh Grant wasn't going to be super involved in it. It was like maybe not everyone's coming back. Yeah. And then Hugh is sort of known to be like, oh, well, if I'm doing it, I'm going to write my own part.

Because I'm just so over working with these awful scripts and I'm just going to do my own thing. So he did. He like got involved with the script writing. Did he? Yeah. So then it was confirmed he was back. Colin Firth was back kind of

kind of and then hot guy from that what's the one McDreamy no no no no not McDreamy Leo

Woodall oh yeah yeah okay I don't know who that is from White Lotus White Lotus and he's in the Apple TV show

the new and he was in that one day one day oh he's in one day he's in one day TV show, the new... And he was in that... One Day. One Day. Oh, he's in One Day. He's in One Day, yeah. He bummed his uncle. Yeah, he was, yeah.

He bummed his uncle. Hayley, we don't say that. Who bummed his uncle? Oh, my goodness. The new season. No, season one. No, season two. It wasn't actually uncle.

He bummed his uncle. No, it wasn't his uncle, but it was... Okay, stop. You remember that scene. Oh, it was that guy's... It wasn't... She comes around the corner, he's bumming his own uncle. His own uncle, though.

But it wasn't his actual uncle. Anyway. Anyway. So I watched it with my mum and I loved it. In fact, there's a lot of. You watched someone bum their uncle with your mum? No, it wasn't that. I wasn't watching White Lotus.

You don't watch White Lotus with your parents. No, you don't. No, you don't. You don't. But you watch the Bridget Jones. You don't watch White Lotus with your parents. No, you don't. No, you don't. You don't. But you watch the Bridget Jones film with your mum. And I watched it with my mum. And we just loved it so much. It's so good and sad.

I cried. See, I'm not a movie crier. I cried four times. Yeah, I know. Wow. It's so beautifully performed. Hugh Grant as Daniel Cleaver is just perfect and then it just really it's like

it kind of closes everything because you get to see everyone we learn that Bridget's gonna be okay the kids are okay the friends are still friends they're still hanging out Hugh is even okay and he's so self aware now he's a better man Daniel Cleaver's finally a good man like it just felt like

at the end that'll be it. You know, there won't be a fifth. Well, yeah. We need to pay some bills. Is the next one like her daughter having a diary or something? Yeah, maybe. Who's the kid? So it's her and Colin

Firth. They've got two kids. How old are they in this movie? Who plays them? I don't know. How old would they be? They're primary school. Six or nine, maybe, or something like that. Okay, so it's sticking to the timeline. Yeah, yeah, totally. But we've jumped ahead a little bit, and, you know, plot twist, but it's really sad. Right, but worth seeing.

So worth it. If you're like me and you love the original films, and then you're nervous that this one's going to let you down, hand on heart, it won't. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Do you know, it's only February. We're quite early on in the year. I reckon we've found like the meme of the year

or like one of the things, like Huak Tua was last year, the anglerfish I feel like is going to be very pivotal to 2025. Right. If you missed this, there was a small, very small anglerfish, which is the ones with the, like a black fish with all the razor teeth and they live.

It's got a little, little light bulb. Well, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep. Yeah. It's got a little bioluminescent thing that the fish in the dark swim towards and it goes. Yeah.

And they only ever live in the pitch black ocean, right? Yeah. And then there was this one and it was seen swimming for the surface, heading towards the light and it swiftly died. And everyone was like, she, you know, so beautiful. She wanted to see the light.

Shannon, didn't you cry? Many times. Many times. Over the weekend, I thought about it again. Because I think we can all We can all have our light That's right This is what we talked about last week What are you swimming for today?

And for me it was my hacks And then I got it That's right you swam for the surface People are putting all of their emotional baggage On this tiny four centimetre fish My favourite one was a picture These animations that they have of the fish Like head up

Swimming for the little light and it says she finally saw a light she didn't create. I mean, it's just, do you know what I mean? That's just true. Well, let me bring that crashing down for you. People are putting too much on a fish. Oh, you don't get it because like. Yeah, the internet was like this.

The internet was just completely in tears. I'll say women in particular. Maybe we're all menstruating. I think we've sunk, we've sinked. Yeah. As a planet. Scientists and anglerfish aficionados. Now that's a great term.

Wow. Anglerfish aficionados. Have given actually the likely reason that she wasn't swimming to the surface to just see it one time before she died. She most likely had quite a lot of trapped gas and was literally floating full of gas. So she was a gassy girl. She was a gassy girl.

So she's gone from representing your hopes and dreams to just representing being a gassy girl. That's me. Yeah, a little bit of bloating, a little bit of... I think that's going to make me cry more because I think we can all see ourselves in her still. No, it's not as... So basically they think that this little fish ate a type of fish with a swim bladder or a gas gland.

Yeah. And as it was digesting in the anglerfish's stomach, it kept expanding and the fish was just like, oh no, no, no, no, no, no. Like in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory when him and the granddad drink the bubble things and then float up towards this ceiling fan that's going to chop them to pieces. The fish had fizzy lifting drink. Yeah. And it can't stop and it's just going, no, no, no, I'm going to die, I'm going to die, I'm not supposed to be up here. So it wasn't swimming to the light, it was being dragged

unceremoniously to its own death. By farts. By farts. By unreleased farts. Wow. By irritable bowel syndrome. Now that animation of it going up, rather than saying she saw light she didn't create, farts will kill us all. Farts will kill us all.

Farts. Trapped farts. Better out than in. That's the new meme. Better out than in. Trapped farts will kill us all. Yeah. So I'm sorry to bring that. Not as sexy, is it?

Romantic sort of emotional moment we all share. It's fun but practical though. Yeah, she's just full of farts, bro. Yeah. She was full of farts. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Here's an article I read this morning, and I want to share it with you now.

The title is, Calling All Millennials, that's me. And me just. You just and you barely. Calling All Millennials, side parts are officially back in style. Pause for applause.

We're excited. I didn't know. I didn't know that they were out. Well, it didn't really affect you as much as it affected the likes of me. No. For various reasons. Were you previously a side parter? Exclusively. Oh, wow. Okay. Really? Yeah. What side did you part on?

The left side of my face. My left. Yeah. To the right. How far off middle were you? Not extreme. Okay. Oh, she's not up on the wall. So Bree from the afternoon show, she goes quite to the side. She's had a big side part. She goes a swoop.

I'd sort of say a quarter of the forehead. Okay. To the left, I'd go like that. When did you stop doing that? When the young people told me it wasn't cool anymore. Okay, right. So Gen Z, can I talk to our Gen Z's here? Was it about the same time as ankle socks

got cancelled? No, it was a little bit earlier. Right. A little bit earlier, but we were told quite clearly, quite crisply side parts are gone. Yeah, I think it ages people because you're going asymmetrical. The whole thing about like a beautiful face quote unquote is how symmetrical

you are. And I think you're throwing it off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As soon as you do a middle part, I think people look younger. Yeah. They look more symmetrical, therefore maybe more beautiful. I'm a big fan. Do you know when this lined up with when we were told, sorry, it's going to make me emotional,

when we were told that skinny jeans were not okay anymore. Yeah. And we were told they had to be baggy. They are making a bit of a comeback. They are coming back, yeah. Alex Earle started wearing them, which means I will now do it because Alex Earl did it. Can we bring the waist back being higher?

Because, you know, the Gen Z's, they really baggied the pant and they brought the waistline lower. If you're going to Google Alex Earl like I am right now. With an I. Stupid spelling.

A-I-L-X-E and then Earl with an E on the end. Yeah. Oh, right. I, of course, I put A-L-L-X-E and then Earl with an E on the end. Yeah. Oh, right. I, of course, just... She's really stuffed that away. I put A-L-E-X, Alex, and Earl, E-A-R-L. So she's wearing skinny jeans again.

Yes. So now we're allowed to? We're starting to. Thank you, Alex. And they're quite high up as well. She's going... She is like a size 0.0, so I will say that's unfair. Yeah.

So there was, there was just this moment in time where everyone said we're not doing side parts anymore okay and millennials you're gonna get on board no ankle socks no skinny jeans no side parts and i've abided and i went center and i've been center for some time but apparently it is back it's back in vogue uh it's back for young people it's back for people of all ages okay we can swoop againop again. It gives us more volume. Yeah, it gives more volume. It gives more volume. And what I'm saying people do is kind of do a slick on the side.

So you go asymmetrical, a lot of volume on the top and then slick it down on one side. People are doing a little clip, a barrette. Yes. And that's kind of the cutesy look at the moment. If you hear that, Vaughan, that's all it takes

is we just do it on the side and we get more volume. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. For yours, youughan? That's all it takes is we just do it on the side and we get more volume. Yeah. Wow. I mean, for yours, you'll just have to, yeah. Cancel. I'm making eye contact

with Hayley specifically. But you guys can bring back the skinny jeans if you want. Three men with hair implants. Yes. Have you seen the videos during the rounds of like someone being like,

I was in Turkey and this is the hotel breakfast, smorgasbord, and they're having a buffet breakfast and they're scanning around and dudes are just bleeding heads. And this was the airport bar on the way out of Turkey and it's all just British dudes sitting there drinking with

these bandages and stuff. I've seen one and it's like here's the gate going back from Turkey and it's everyone with headbands. It's so wild. And a donut to sit on. What have they done to their donut? Baby L. Oh, the girls get the baby L.

Brilliant. Are they going to Turkey for a Brazilian butt lift? Yeah. For me, I feel like I'd go to Brazil. I'd go to the home of the butt lift. Yeah. I've seen lots of people go to Turkey and you can get... They do like the whole...

They're like getting my hair extensions done, getting lash extensions done, getting it... They spend like... Boobies, tummies, face... Turkey's the place to go for the one-stop shop. like... Boobies, tummies, face extensions, arms. Extension is very much the place to go. The cost, yeah. 10% of the cost? Yeah, of America, yeah. Yeah, it's

crazy. I'm learning everything from TikTok. I'm going to take this with a grain of salt. I'm learning it from my booking that I've been making. Five years' time. My itinerary I'm putting together. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. What's your jobby? What's your jobby? What's your jobby?

What's your jobby? What's your jobby? What's your jobby? We ask you three questions about your job and then try to guess what it is. And we've done this a few times this year. None wins, none wins. Yeah, no success.

Stephanie, good morning. Good morning. Stephanie, good morning. Good morning. Stephanie, first question, do you have a staff room? Yes. Great question. Great question. Oh my god. Brilliant.

So it's not an office because no need for a staff room if you've got an office, right? But then you say we've got a kitchen. But that's not a staff room. I a staff room if you've got an office, right? No, but then would you say we've got a kitchen? But that's not a staff room. No, it's not. I said staff room. And I'm thinking that immediately counts out tradies. Yep.

Unless, you know, farmers don't have a staff room. Yeah, good, good. Unless there's a big operation, they might have a little port-a-com. When we drove the big trucks, they had a staff room. They had a staff room because they were working at a quarry, but that was for the people at the quarry. Great question. Stephanie, I'm going to go deep here with my question.

Uh-oh. Do you love your job? Oh, shit. Oh, wow, the emotion. Here we go. I'm actually so lucky. I actually do love my job. Oh, my God, we love our job.

That's so great. I work really hard to get to where I am, so I love my job. She's passionate. That's a little tip. really hard To get to where I am So I love my job She's passionate That's a little tip She's got a staff room She's got a staff room And she's passionate She's worked really hard I think she's worked really hard

She's got a staff room She's passionate I'm leaning towards a teacher Yeah same Because Same Because they have to love their job Yeah

Let's face it Well yeah but they don't have to No I know some of my teachers didn't If you have to dig down Dig down you have That was just you I but they don't have to. No, you know, some of my teachers didn't. Dig down, you have, that was just you. I reckon they didn't like you. She was like, you'll amount to nothing. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay, do you work with children,

Stephanie? Ooh, sometimes. Uh-oh. Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! No, she's a bit nurse. I reckon nurse. Yeah, I'm going to say nurse. Nurse or doctor. Loves, yeah, I'm... Works really hard.

They have a staff room. They have a staff room. Works really hard. Then they absolutely, they train for years. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And sometimes works with kids. If you were a teacher, you wouldn't say sometimes. Yeah.

And nurses work harder than doctors. Yes, sometimes. Yeah. You know what I mean? That was, I was just being cheeky there. But also... I'm also a team nurse. Okay. You know what I mean? That was, I was just being cheeky there. But also. I'm also a team nurse. Okay.

Just give a nurse. Just give a nurse. Okay, Hayley, do it, do it, do it. Stephanie, is your job that you're a nurse? I'm not a nurse. Oh, for God's sake. Oh, man, we suck at this game. What is your job?

You're on the right vibe. I'm a sonographer. Oh, so you scan the babies. Socialist. Yeah. I'm a sonographer. Oh, so you scan the babies. Yeah. Well, we scan everything. Oh, yeah, that's right, because technically I think my testicle scan was a sonographer.

Yeah, because I had my shoulder done. And I had my vagina. I had to stop myself saying, is it a boy, is it a girl? Yeah, that's right. Oh, no, no, no. Yeah, do people say that all the time? Stephanie.

All the time. Stephanie, I'm so sorry, but we are going to have to go now to... Just a quick pause before we go to our second caller. Do you think that we just don't know enough jobs? We're like farmer, teacher. Yeah, the brands with broad strokes, right? Yeah, let's get specific. Lauren, good morning. Hello, how are you today?

Really good. Welcome to What's Your Jobby. I'm going to start. Do you wear a uniform for your job? Yes, I do. Lauren, Lauren, did you have to train or get like some kind of qualification in order to have your job? No.

Okay. So not a nurse. Not a nurse, not a teacher, not a doctor, not any kind of medical professional. Those are all the jobs we know. Not an actor, because you do have to get an acting degree in order to ever want to act. I don't think, no, you don't. I was told you actually had to spend that money.

But you could actually act that you have a degree. I do. I don't have one. I've been acting this whole time. The performance of my life. Okay, so a uniform. Okay, Vaughan, we're going to need a really good question from you.

Uniform didn't have to get a qualification to have this particular job. That's really, over to you. I'm wondering if she's like front facing, you know?

Or is she behind this? You don't walk backwards. She's backwards. Do you perform your job backwards? She's got a professor curl, she's got a Voldemort face on the back of her head.

Professional moonwalker. Do you work directly with customers? Yes. Hot damn. Okay, what are we thinking? Uniformed, direct with customers. We've got mitre tear. But that could be anything.

It could be rationale. It could be anything though, couldn't it? Hardware shop. It could be reception. It could be anything. Receptions don't usually wear a uniform. Yes could be rationale. It could be anything though, couldn't it? Hardware shop. It could be reception. It could be anything. Receptions don't usually wear a uniform. Yes, they do. Receptionists

wear uniforms at places with uniforms a-lead. I don't think they do. Lauren, Lauren, Lauren. I think she works in a hardware store. Yeah, you got a hardware vibe? But why don't you just say retail? Then that could be anything.

I know, but we have to be that specific? No, we have to be specific. Okay. What if we say, do you work in retail? That's yes, that triggers that we have to be more specific. But are we out of questions? Yeah, I think we've used our three. We're out of questions.

Yeah, we have to just guess the job. Okay, go. Didn't need a qualification, wears a uniform, deals front-facing with customers. She works at my tent, I'm telling you. She works at my office. Or a garden centre. Or...

Do you work in a... I think we say hardware. Okay, yeah. Okay. Why have you guys got such a fixation on a hardware store? This is how our brains work, though. This is why I'm bad at that game Headbands, where I'm like, am I a duck?

And they're like, no. And I'm like, well, now I don't know who I am. I don't know what I am. Yeah. Am I Donald Duck? I've forgotten everything else in the world exists apart from ducks. Okay, Lauren. Yes, hello.

Is your jobby that you work retail in a hardware store? You're half, right? Oh, wait, wait. hang on then, shut up. Hang on. Wait, well, what is your job? She works retail in... One more guess. No, you don't get one more guess.

You work in a department store. Yes. What are you... Do you work for farmers? No, you've said farmers. Do you work at the warehouse? Yes. Come on, I kind of got it.

I kind of got it. I thought you said silent. Well, somewhat. So, somewhat. I work behind the checkout in the retail. Right, okay, right, right, okay. Come on, I just can't take another loss. Producer Carwin, are you going to allow this as a win for what's your job?

What is the official ruling here? I said you're in a hardware store. You can buy hardware at the warehouse. Oh, yeah, that's true. They do have hardware. They've got screws. They've got hammers. They've got outdoor stuff.

They've got a great garden. They've got, yeah, screwdrivers. Yeah, look, it's Monday. We all need this. It's a win. Yay! Lauren, congratulations. We only guessed that in 3.8 questions.

You did so well. Yeah, we tried. Lauren, congratulations. We've got $100 for What's Your Jobby today. Did you know I used to train the staff at the warehouse? It was one of my first acting gigs. Oh, yes. How'd that go for you?

It was really fun, yeah. It was called Love Your Customer, and I did lots of my first acting gigs. Oh, yes. How'd that go for you? It was really fun, yeah. It was called Love Your Customer, and I did lots of role plays with staff. And you would be playing what, disgruntled customers? Yeah, I'd do all sorts. It was quite fun. And they'd be like, Ma'am, you don't have your receipt.

We can't give you a refund. And I'd be like, rip my clothes off and be like, how are you going to handle this? And that kind of stuff. It was good fun. Great customer service at the warehouse. Just like the training you did with the police.

Yeah, rip my clothes off and be like, how are you going to handle this? Just saying, one trip pony. I see that you're moving. Congratulations, Lauren. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. You know the end of that Doche song?

You may have heard it's a relatively new song. I'd play it off my laptop, except there's only a highly explicit version, which will immediately get us various finds from the- There's four words I think we could play? Yeah. And at the end, they do some breathing exercises at the end of the song.

Terrible breathing exercises, by the way. As someone who went to breathing therapy, that's the antithesis of what you should do. Yeah, panic, hurry, sharp breathing. Yeah. So I was listening to that song and I was doing some yard work and I got up to the part with the breathing

and I went... Oh no! And a cicada flew into my mouth. Oh no! A big fat... It felt like it filled up most of my mouth.

Oh, I cannot. And I went, argh. Then I must have like shut my mouth because it couldn't get back out. And I felt its wings go brrrr, brrrr. You know if you ever grab them, because I love grabbing them. I don't. I hate them. And they're real vibratey. Imagine that in the mouth. I don't like

that they have see-through wings. Yeah, that's off. Their wings are, was it their wings? Their wings might be similar to dragonfly wings. They reckon there's a real secret to it. Yuck, yuck. They're just so aggressive. Yeah, well, you were in the ground for 17 years.

You pop out your life for two weeks. You've got to let it go, girl. I know. You've got to speak your truth. Calm down. They're always like. I remember when I was a kid and I had a paper run of the big yellow bag that had the papers and one flew in and it was just going...

in there and I've just never recovered from it. If one went in my... Mouth hole. In my mouth hole. That might be it for me. I couldn't handle it. Imagine if you swallowed it and it took a good couple of minutes for it to die.

And you'd feel it. Or imagine you swallowed it and it took like a good couple of minutes for it to die. And you'd feel it. Or imagine you swallow it and you open your mouth and it's like, and you hear the cicada noise. Yeah, it fully went in my mouth. And so you spat it out. It probably was only in there for a few seconds, but it felt like forever. You know how those things do. And then I went and spat it out and I watched it falling towards the ground and just before hit the ground it was like and it was like

those planes that were fighting the fires in california yeah just wrote the ground arced up and flew off was probably um held down by your saliva yeah until it managed to show it what's he gonna tell his wife when he gets home like you're not gonna believe what just happened she's gonna be like soaking wet who have you been going to be like, who have you been kissing? Oh, you look sweaty. You're covered in saliva. You're wet and sweaty. Wow.

Whose mouth have you been in? Yeah. Go have a shower. Man's mouth? Oh, you're gay now, are you? Yeah. Imagine that. Cigada.

Cigada. Coming home. Anyway. We've got to be a Cigada. It got me to thinking in the moments of terror that followed where I was like

frantically googled what diseases can I catch from a cicada oh yeah it turns out nah really or that or it hasn't yet been

documented by medicine who are apparently busy looking into other things you could be the start of the next pandemic oh dude there's patient zero what's on your back

there's like these little wings. It's not that you've got to worry about. Listen to this song I wrote with my feet. Vaughan, stop it. It's scaring everyone. I want to know what ended up in your mouth. Yeah, great.

Is that what you're proposing for a phone-in? I'm doing this just for Hayley's friend who paints her nails and really loves the part where people phone in with their stories. Sophie loves the phoners. Sophie loves the phoners. Sophie's going to love this one. What do you have in your mouth?

You mean like accidentally? Yes. Yes. Yes. Great. Yes, yes, yes. What you intentionally put in your mouth is fine. Not what you put in your cup.

Have you ever had a drop from the toilet when you've been using the toilet brush hit your face? Yes. Yep. I always shut my mouth when I brush the toilet. Same, but it's hit my lip. Oh, dude. It's so close to accidentally going in your mouth.

Lip. If it had, you could have called in. I could have called 0800-DALZM and taken part of Sophie's favourite thing, the phoner. The phoner. Okay, so what accidentally went in your mouth? I don't know. I already feel like this is grim.

Okay, go. Bird poop looked up at the sky and yet a bird just pooped straight in the mouth. Imagine like, wow. I always think that could be so much worse. Yeah. Every time you get pooped on, I'm like, that could have been worse. I could have had an eye, mouth. Yeah.

I don't think it could be worse than going straight in your mouth, Vaughn. It's disgusting. Okay, there are some great messages already coming through, especially judging by the looks on your face. I'm full of regret. 0800-DANCE-IT-M is our number. You can text through 9696.

What ended up in your mouth? Accidentally. Accidentally ended up in your mouth. Thank you. Oh my God, could you have the sound for the secret sound? I've thrown you here. That sounds like cicada in your mouth sounds like a cicada in your mouth.

So this happened at the weekend. That's what it felt like. Flew into Vaughan's mouth. Had at. I don't know what it did in there. It was in there for a few seconds. It absolutely had at. Now I want somebody to guess a cicada in Vaughan's mouth for $20,000.

This whole phone is actually a clue when we're just playing the system. So message is in on what accidentally ended up in your mouth. I was pregnant with a glass of water beside the bed, woke up absolutely parched, took a big sip, got a mouthful of cockroach. From then on out, I will only do small sippies beside the bed.

Yeah, you're going to need a sippy bottle, I think. Yeah, you need a bottle. Rachel, what accidentally ended up in your mouth? Hey, Kane. So driving along in the car, folded down the back seat to let the dog have some extra area in the back. And she was playing so good

and I turned around to say, who's a good girl, Reba? And when you make an R sound, your mouth opens. Reba. Reba. Rebar. And she promptly did the biggest mucusy sneeze directly into my mouth. Julia. Sneeze.

Is your dog named after Reba McIntyre or the bars that go through concrete to give it extra strength? The bestest dog in the world who's no longer with us, Reba, was named after Reba McIntyre. I'm so sorry for your loss. Oh, I'm sorry, darling. But no more sneezes in the mouth. You really brought up that trauma. There was no indication the dog was dead earlier in the story. Rachel, thank you. You always have that sweet memory of Reba. Yeah, and that taste in the back

of your mouth. Natalia, good morning. Good morning. What accidentally ends up in your mouth? Okay, I'll set the scene. This is North Queensland. Yep, yep. Oh, God, it better not be a snake. No, it wasn't a snake.

Oh, hell no, it wasn't a snake. Anyway, we had a major, major problem with green frogs. Okay. Cute, though. Yes, but yes, they are cute. So, anyway, one day we made a cup of coffee and we drank our coffee. There was all these chunks in the coffee. We couldn't work it out anyway.

We drank our coffee. We investigated. In the kettle was a frog that had boiled to death and we just ate all the chunks. Wait, wait, wait. You boiled it? Alive. And so the chunks in the coffee that you couldn't identify were like frog bits. When they boil, frog falls to pieces.

I would have a frog. Dare I say, though, if any coffee or liquid is lumpy and has bits in it, you should identify straight away. Yeah, I did throw up, though. Oh, yeah. I'm not up. I'm not surprised. You boiled a frog alive and sipped it down. Natalia, thank you. Amy, what

accidentally ended up in your mouth? Hello? Hello. Hi. Back in 2015 at a One Direction concert, I don't know if you guys have ever seen Harry Styles when he'll take a swig of water and then he sprays it up above his head.

It's like his little thing. Yes. So I had waited in line for 12 hours to get to the front of the banister for this concert because being a 1D fan, of course. Yep. And when he did this spray up in the air water thing, I was so close to the balustrade that his spit got in my mouth.

That's hot. That's hot, man. That's hot. I don't know. I don't know that's hot. I'd imagine you're the only one that's calling out that was happy about what accidentally ended up in their mouth. If anyone asks me what, like, a fun fact is about myself,

that's what I go to. Harry Styles spat in my mouth. Yes. You should get a T-shirt made, Amy, actually. Harry Styles spat in my mouth and I liked it. That's a good idea. I went to the shop. Yeah, wow.

I love that. That's so good. Amy, thank you. Way better than a chunky boiled frog. Yeah. Keep your texts coming in. 9696 0800 dials it in What accidentally

ended up in your mouth? Miles Smith We're talking about what ended up in your mouth Accidentally Accidentally ended up in your mouth Because the person that said

my ex-boyfriend had three other things end up in the mouth That's not accidentally though is it? No People were a bit silly

on the Instagram responses too Grow up Grow up. Grow up. How many people said doodles? Lots of chicken emojis came through. Yeah, okay. Chicken emojis. They had some decorum, but not enough.

Not enough decorum. Waste my time. Waste my time. Wow. We want to hear stories like this one. My mum ended up with her dad's ashes in her mouth when they were spreading them at sea. I don't think anyone's ever spread ashes at the ocean and realised they're light and there's quite the updraft. But I would have thought it's such a comical scene

in movies and TV shows and it happens enough that you would check the wind direction. Yeah, and you're also not throwing anymore, are we? We tip. We're tipping so that a more downward action. I was running through a paddock and my brother ankle tapped me and I went face first and got a big mouthful of cow poo. That would have been quite...

I milk cows, so cow poo, I've had that milking cows as well because you're lower than them and you know, down in the milking pit and you turn around and you're like,

uh-oh, and then it's too late, the cannon's already started. Oh no. Hey guys, I stayed at a friend's in Wairoa the other night. Now that sounds like a hookup.

I'm just going to say it. Wairoa? Sounds like a hookup. Yeah, stayed at a friend's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stayed at a friend's in Wairua the other night. Now that sounds like a hookup. I'm just going to say it. Wairua? Sounds like a hookup. Yeah, stayed at a friend's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you stay at mine all the time. Yeah, and what do we get up to? All sorts of shenanigans. Sexy, sexy stuff. Let's not talk about this tomorrow at work.

They had no power in the bathroom. It was all dark. I took my toothbrush and paste and started brushing my teeth in the dark. My mouth started to feel very weird and funny. I spat it out and took one I had out into the other room and realised I brushed my teeth with deep heat. That's bad. I do fertility testing

on bulls. You can work out the rest. Okay. Imagine. Imagine. I'd have some Listerine in the glove box if that was my job. Yeah, same. I think I'd just go straight petrol. Really get it.

Just straight rubbing alcohol to get that out. Getting it out. We'd whack some old dog poo that the kids didn't pick up yesterday. My mouth was open. They were in my mouth. It also does sound like your fault you didn't see it. Yeah. Not my mouth, but I'm a nurse.

And we used leeches on the ward. This one particular patient needed one on their face overnight. But then when they finished leeching, we were like, where's the leech gone? And the leech had crawled inside their mouth while they were asleep and had like nestled themselves on the top of their mouth. Ooh, leeches. That leech scene in Apple Cider Vinegar. Like, because you remember the leech scene in what was that movie, Stand By Me? Yeah, they get covered in leeches.

What's the way to get them off? You put a lighter under them or something, don't you? Do you? You're not supposed to just pull them off. Yuck, they creep me out. My friend hid a bottle of red. This is so classic Wellington. My friend hid a bottle of red, this is so classic Wellington. My friend hid a bottle of red

wine in a bush on Courtney Place. He went back to get it a little bit later and took a big swig. The bottle he had picked up was not his. Definitely had ciggy butts and bugs. I dread to think what else was in there. Found his bottle a little further along. At least it wasn't homeless wee. That's all I'm going to say.

Well, it could have been. Oh no. For the person, this phone ends in 343. You tell that story like it's no big deal. Second's all I'm going to say. Well, it could have been. Oh, no. For the person's phone ends in 343, you tell that story like it's no big deal. Second to top text, Hayley. Don't read it out. Hayley, no, no, no, no, no, no. You tell that story like it's no big deal. That's one of the most horrendous things I've ever read.

Okay. Agreed? The audience will never know. They will never know. Oh, but now I'm like the audience. I don't know. Yeah, we'll tell you off here. It's one of those things that once you know, you can never unknow. Oh, but now I'm like the audience. I don't know. Yeah, we'll tell you off here.

It's one of those things that once you know, you can never unknow. Oh, okay. And sometimes it's better to let me be burdened with this curse. Okay. I've got lots of them. Oh, someone else's event was expressing dog's anal glands. I think we should just end the phoner.

I think we're just done with this phoner. See, a cicada that flew into your mouth, Warren. Perspective. Nothing. Somebody, no.n. Perspective. Nothing. Somebody, no, I don't want to. Somebody. Come on. Snorted Uncle Campbell's ashes at a head do. Licked fingers after to seal the deal.

He'd be so proud. No, he wouldn't. No, he wouldn't. No, he wouldn't. Wait, what? What did Uncle Campbell do in his life that would have led to him being proud of that moment with his ashes? and I don't think we're supposed to ingest human remains.

No, I think we are right. And we'll leave it there. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Tomorrow I will be uploading a photo of me in a hospital gown and probably like a little, you know, my little patient bracelet around. Can you make it real vague? Yeah, yeah, just be like, just going

through some stuff right now. Yeah. Something like that. Yeah. Hey guys, just like not my favourite day but like I guess everyone has their own thing

to deal with. Shrug. Something like that. Yeah, download my app the whole pantry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's been a good run but it's back.

Hashtag download for 10% off. Use my code Haley10 for my app. I support my charities. No, I'm having a minor surgery tomorrow on my vaginal area. There's no way to dance around it.

I have a Bartholin cyst. I've danced around a few vaginal areas. Yeah, good for you. In my time. Yeah, flitch. One way massage. A little foxtrot. A little two-step.

A little Paso Doble. Have a little tango or two. A little four-step. Right, A little two-step. A little Paso Doble. Have a little tango or two. A little four-step. Right, a little four-step. A little line dance. This is where they fully put you under? Yeah, I'm going to sleep because it's... Cool.

Do you get propofol? I don't actually know the drug I'm getting. Please. I think if you beg for a certain drug as you get checked into the hospital, they at least like it to get it to you. I don't know if that's how hospitals work, Vaughn. Please. Propofol.

No, I think I'm proper asleep because propofol, you're not out now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's a cortipathol insistent. It's in your vagina, but it's really common. But I just didn't notice it. And now it's the size of a big golf ball. So it's got to go. Wow, like hail.

I think golf ball summed up the size well enough. I think hail is so rare. If you said hail, I was going to be like pee. But it's not, it's golf ball. Sometimes hail can be the size of golf balls. It ruins canyons. But I agree, golf ball covered the size. But she said golf ball.

The size is ticked off. Right. Hail just completely played a different picture. Do you get to see it afterwards? No, because it's not a hard ball. It's soft, like a sack of fluid. So they'll have to like. Well, there's two.

I talked to Dr. Shawnee for my free medical advice yesterday. Oh my God. My fungus on my finger. Oh my God, can you leave him alone? He's all, No, he was interested

because he did a presentation in his first year at medical school on marsupialisation. So there's two things. That's where you turn into a kangaroo. And I will be very aggressive.

Very rare. Very rare. But the medical world is stunned when it happens. But tomorrow, when she gets this removed, she may come back on Wednesday with a pouch. I'm just saying on Wednesday, I may be very tall and I may kick you.

Okay, I may kick you. Imagine if you go for a different marsupial and you end up a platypus. Oh, no. Oh, no. I don't even know if that's even a marsupial. No, but I can either have, you can either just like a normal cyst, you can either just lance it and drain it, or marsupialisation, you kind of do the whole thing

and it's a bigger surgery, which I think I'm getting done. You're getting like a plasty. No, but I was like, I'm going to have a little... What would you change? As PG as we can keep it, what would you change about it? No, actually nothing quite proud of it. Yeah, I was going to say that. Yeah, that's quite nice.

I don't want anyone being drowned out by these small rhymes. No, no, absolutely. It's a true story. It's got spirit. It's got character. No, no, it's fine. I don't want anyone being drowned out by these thrones. No, no, absolutely. It's a true story. It's got spirit. It's got character. So the doctor rings you yesterday. Doctor rings me yesterday just to sort of give you the rundown

of what's going to happen and whatnot. You know, the pain to expect and that kind of stuff and how the day's going to go. It's all going to be fine. Not allowed to swim, shag, spa. All the yeses. All of it. Why aren't you allowed a spa? I thought it sealed over. Huh? Fine. Not allowed to swim, shag, spa. All the S's. All that. Why aren't you allowed to spa?

I thought it sealed over. Huh? Well, it's a wound. Yeah, right. You can't go to the spa with a wound. With a wound? A healing wound. I thought you were getting your chemicals in your spa.

It was good pH. Yeah, even worse. Oh. Okay. It's even worse. Right. Getting in there with chlorine on a fresh wound. Yeah, okay. No, not allowed to do anything. It's going to be a very, very boring time. And a fresh wound Not allowed to do anything

It's going to be a very boring time Not allowed to gym, four weeks No gym, no swim No fun times Wow on top My question was Just top stuff I thought you meant You'd be on top.

That's okay. And I was like, no, that wouldn't. That's not okay. That's not missionary. That's fine. Not that. God bless radio. Can't see what I'm doing.

That's just for my friends Fletch and Vaughan. The only thing is I hung up and I was like, I didn't ask the question. It was the same question you asked yourself, Vaughan, when you had your scan of your testicles when you were experiencing pain. What am I doing with the prep of the area? Because there's not a lot.

I've had laser, but there's a bit. The surgery, they do it to clean up of the area anyway, don't they? But I don't know. I just want to take care of it. If you don't do it and it needs to be done, they'll just do it. And then I feel they would do it with no shaving gel and one of those Bic razors.

Is it public health or private? Private. Oh, they'd probably have a chic Quattro. They'd probably have a chic. They'd probably do it with a straight razor. Oh, you'd put a steamed towel on me. Steamed towel. They'd get a barber in.

Yes. Some Persian foam. Yeah, maybe. But I was sort of like not in the, do you know what I mean? It's sort of weird. Yeah, they're going to be down there looking. In the area. Do I have to do it? But then it's that same question. You're like, you can't turn up with it

all kind of... Sex ready. Sex ready, we called it. Yeah. It's sort of a bit rude. When I have my shoulder operation which I'm going to have to have at some time this year you definitely need to shave your pews

do you wear undies? do you wear undies? it's on your shoulder they're not going to be seeing why can't I wear undies? you don't wear undies for any procedure why not? I don't think this private clinic should could go to is a clinic at all.

Wait, so you're telling me that they could just pull apart my skirt? I'm sure, but isn't it an emergency thing? Any medical... Yeah, yeah, Shannon. Why does Shannon know? Why does he shit himself? What's the... What if I shit?

What if I do a fart and it's too much? They put a puppy pad under you. But no, I think it's to, you know, in case you needed a catheter or something, I think it's just the less stuff there, the better. They'll just put you in a little gown. Yeah, and then no bra. You don't even wear a bra. They're not operating on my genital area.

It's my shoulder. Why do they get to see my... I mean, I'm no medical professional, but I'm pretty sure you have nothing on just to... You've got nothing. Would you take a peek? Yeah, I have a little look. If the guy was hot, would you have a peek? If you're a nurse?

Just to check that everything was in the right order. No, that was in the last time they went on strike. That was part of the negotiations. You get to have a little peek. You get to have a little look. Yeah, we get paid a little bit more. We need better resources and we get to have a little peek. Yeah.

Yeah. Fair, I guess. Hospitals sometimes give you hospital undies In case they need to Cut them off Because that's if Something goes wrong And you bloody Go crazy Because if something

Goes wrong in his surgery He might be Tossing around They're going to Shove a catheter in there Or something Oh Oh I know

Now someone did say I've had a bath I'll insist out It hurts to pee afterwards Like someone's Poking you in the vajayjay With a hot poker Ask for some good drugs

Again but you don't Want to seem too eager. Like you've got to... Always too keen. Yeah, yeah. Like they offer you one and you're like, no, that's number four on my list. Do you have a two or a one?

I got told if I removed hair, my surgery could be cancelled. Leave it hairy. Someone else said. Goodness. I think I'll just leave it to them. Yeah, leave it. And hope she does a good job.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. My schooling went like this. Small, rural, public school. Yep. Then urban, intermediate, and then urban college. But urban was more as well, so not huge. All public. All public.

No private school in here. I called the bus to every single one of them. Yep. Apart from the primary school, when we got a bit older, we'd ride our bikes, but it was only because then you'd jump on your bike and ride down the hill as fast as you can in the afternoon to try to beat the bus home. So bad.

Sounds safe. Yeah, it sounds really, really safe. Hey, we always wore helmets. Oh, you're good. We always wore helmets. Yeah, of course. And we'd only go down the hill and try to kick each other off the bikes every other day.

How ridiculous is that? Again, sounds safe. But I never got to do road patrol. Oh, darling. Because at Intermediate when there was road patrol, the town kids did it because the country kids

had to get on the bus to get home. Oh, of course. I road patrol. You both talked about road patrol. Primary and Intermediate. Wow. Yes.

Responsible. And I think I got a badge. I think I got a badge on my shirt for road patrol. That's the first time I wore high-vis Road Patrol, signs out, check safe cross now Signs in Pre-high-vis, you wouldn't have had high-vis

Yeah, not much high-vis Because you know road patrols now I see they're all bloody fancy, they've got a hinge on the pole Yeah, we had a hinge We didn't have a hinge We just had to hold the whole sign This is why I've got shoulder surgery coming up because of, yeah. Because of road patrol.

Hear that, ACC? Yeah. When you're deciding this week if you're going to fund that. I'll sue them. I'll sue them. Education system. It's so good to acknowledge that people in New Zealand are living in poverty. Do you know what I mean?

Well, we- You had to hold your stick. Yeah. And our sticks and signs were made out of like tip-top ice cream lids. It just said road patrol. Yeah, stop. It was spelled wrong. Road patrol.

Road patrol. Hey, it was a DSL1 school and you know what? I turned out okay. Yeah, you're done. You're done turning out. I've seen it. You've been here.

You've seen it and done it. I think, Vaughan, you would have thrived because that's where I really found my voice, as the caller. Because you had two on the sticks, one on each side of the road. But you had a whistle, though, right? No, we didn't have a whistle.

You had a whistle. I think we had a whistle, yeah. No, we just had a call. Signs out! So, wait, the caller stands on the same side of the road as the children coming out of the school. Yes, on the school side. That's the caller.

What's the other person called? Well, they're just the other lollipop stick. Oh, they're the lollipop stick. Wow. Signed out. I was always with the whistle because I was obviously, you know, in charge.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a leader. He's a natural born leader. Natural born leader. Yeah. But then you do your little chant. 100% would have been the kid on the other side of the road

not paying attention. They would have been like, signs out, and I would have been like. Yeah, and then the kid would have got hit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That would have been disastrous.

But, so that's how it worked. Yeah. It was only like 15 minutes, right? Oh, and you got to leave class early. You got to leave class a little bit early to set up. Yeah, but then you got home a bit later after everybody else. And by the end of the year, did you get a reward trip? We got to go to the Hydra Slide.

We got a free Hydra Slide afternoon. Yeah, I think we went to the pool. Yeah, to the pools. At August school, and the main reason my daughter August, for the pool. Yeah, to the pools. At August school, and the main reason my daughter August, for people who don't listen to the show and hear their names, it's a great name, you're right, timeless. You'd hear too many on Females.

It'll be like the Hayley of the 90s. Wow, this is going to be crazy. Yeah, there's going to be a ton of them. We do have an Indy with three other Indys in her hockey team. Also the Hayley or Emma of the 90s. Yes. And of course Louise or Rose is the middle name. It has to be. Louise, Rose or Jane.

Yeah. Of course, they had to be. So she, my daughter, heard that the trip to Rambo's End is the reward at the end of the year for the road patrol. Oh, okay. So she signed up for the road patrol. Nice. She did have a chat the other day with Constable Brian.

Oh, yeah. Brought home the things and she's like, this is what we have to do. And it was like that But they have a hinge though Don't they They've got a hinge See this generation Just won't know

Sometimes They have to carry The sign all the way out there Yeah it's heavy With the black and white stripes And the big orange dodge See if that was again me I'm always looking for a shortcut

An easy way to do things I just would have hid that sign In the bush Close to the side of the road So that it was always there Someone would steal it Producer Shannon, did you do road patrol?

I did not, but my school did the Rainbow Zen thing. I think it's an Auckland classic. I think most schools did it. Yeah, right, that's how they, okay. Yeah, right. Did you do it, Carwen? Yeah, of course I did.

My loud voice, of course I did. Yeah, it signs out. So you didn't get a whistle either? No, no, no. I think that's why I was picked for it because I've got, I can really engage, you know? Yeah. But did you have hinges for your lollipops? I think we did. No, no, no. I think that's why I was picked for it because I've got, I can really engage, you know.

But did you have hinges for your lollipops? I think we did. Yeah, I think everyone has a hinge now. I think now they would have a hinge. Can we get a check?

What was your primary school? Marfell. I'm going to go on Google Maps and go on Street View and see if they've got a hinge. I'm worried about... What was your school called? Marfell.

Marfell. Primary, yeah, what? What is that silly? she going to say clowns Are you making up stories again Did you not go to school Are you hearing Answer the question Marfell school

It's very simple How old are you I believe That I went To Marfell primary school I believe at the time Marfell community school Yeah that one

Community school What road did they cross Balear Ave Oh no the cross? Balear Ave? Oh, no, the other one. Balear Ave. Endeavour Ave? Endeavour Street? Endeavour, yeah.

Was it Endeavour Street? I think so. Did they have a hinge? I hope they have because it was a decile one at primary school and it still probably is. But you grew up jacked. Do you know what I mean? Good shoulders.

Great shoulders. I've accidentally zoomed in and I can't unzoom to get the little man to drop him off the street. Well, good luck to August. I'm just more concerned about this Mar-Fell. That's just a made up word. I went to primary school.

Is that what we're doing? We don't call them that anymore. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. This week's theme for Fact of the Day is, oh, by the way, just quickly to touch, Marfell Community School, Fletcher's School. Not a real school.

It's a real school. It's a real school. In New Plymouth. It does now have sort of a hinged system for the lollipop sign outside of the school. Does that raise the decile of the school? No, because I've just Googled it's still a decile one. But again, I did good. I've seen and done it.

It looks like a lovely school. Yeah, it is. I think the decile system is pretty... It's cooked. It's nothing, yeah. It's got nothing to do with the school. It's like BMI. The lovely park next to it used to be a landfill,

but now they covered it over and they covered it over years ago. Does it have those little pipes that let out the buildup of methane gas? No. It should have those because otherwise it could cause subsidence. Yes, yes, yes. It could be a flammable gas percolating down there. All right. The theme for Fact of the Day.

Hayley, please stop typing. I'm in the middle of a very important thing. Sorry, I just got some good gossip from my best friend, but I'm happy to just turn that down. I can't say on air. Can't say on air. Is it about the... No, yeah.

Well, it's just things, you know. Okay, cool. Okay. Carrie, back to you. Okay. And the stuff that you listed. There is the Fact of the Day this week. The theme is going to be the origins of insults.

Oh, I love that. Oh, great. Where have we got... This already sounds better than calendar week. I will say it's not. Already sounds better than calendar week. I'll say it. What would you like?

No, I'm going to tell you scumbag. Okay. The origin of calling someone a scumbag? A scumbag. You scumbag. Was it a bag full of scummy things? Like, you know. It was one particular bag, a very small bag,

full of one particular type of scum. Poops. Poop sack. No. What about that tobacco spit? Oh, yeah. You know, in Westerns, they'd. No, but.

That's what I always thought it had something to do with. Yeah. What about the sacks that they hang on the back of tails, of horses' tails? Oh, I just thought that was poop. Poops. Nope. Poop sacks.

Nope. Scum. A scum bag is what people used to call a condom. Oh, Vaughan. I know. This was a hugely surprising thing for me to have. Please grow up. Grow up.

Actually, we should be encouraging the use of condoms. Really disgusted. Who knew? We are. Wow. We encourage good sexual health here. Absolutely we do. We really discourage any more babies in the children.

Yeah. That's enough of that. They're so loud, aren't they? One woke me up at the weekend at a campground. One was loud. Who took a baby camping? Who takes a baby camping? There's a baby.

It should be in a crib. In a nursery. Anyway. If it's not going to remember it, stay home. I did like your adventurous spirit until 5.30 in the morning. So it originally referred to a condom, often in its used situation

and the term was originally used to describe someone who is morally filthy or contemptible. Just need to slow myself down to say that word. Over time, it evolved just to be a person who was considered despicable or unscrupulous. Wow.

So that's when you call someone a scumbag, you're effectively calling them a used condom. Wow. I might just go cut to the chase and just go straight to there. Oh, quite a used condom. Yeah. So today's fact of the day,

and the first of Insult Origin Week, is that a scumbag was originally what was referred, how you refer to a used condom. He went to a DeSalle 1 scope. I went to a DeSalle, actually it was a DeSalle 9 in rural because it was Terry Farms. Oh, what a fact of the day. Day, day, day, day, day. It just sounds like the plot of that Andrew Garfield, Florence Pugh movie, We Live in Time. I haven't watched that, but it looks real sad.

Yeah, it would make you cry. But she's driving along, she hits Andrew on, no, yes, yes, she's driving along. She hits Andrew. No. Yes. Yes. She's driving along. She hits Andrew on his bike. And then he gets in an accident. This happened in real life.

Spider-Man. He should have seen that coming. Yeah. Well, he should have used his. Got out of there. So there is a couple from China. And one day, Lee was driving around and he was speeding in his car. Goodness me.

Lee. Lee. For God's sake. That's not going to be good for his social credit score. He'll get a minus star for that. Oh, yeah. It's going to be terrible. So he's driving along.

He's going too fast and then he was distracted. And then the worst thing happened. He hit a woman on her bike and she fell and got crashed and broke a collarbone. Bad. Yeah. Yeah, really bad. So he went up to her, like got out of the car, didn't do a runner. And I think that's why the story goes where it goes. Because

he went and checked on her, went to the hospital, da da da da. He was like, are you okay? Her response, no worries. Which is really funny to me. Just one of those people that doesn't like a fuss. I'm fine. I think your collarbone's broken. No worries. Don't worry about it. I'm so sorry about just being there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry about that.

So he started visiting her in hospital. She recovered. They sparked up a friendship and then after a few weeks of this kind of awkward interaction being like, hey, I nearly killed you. She admitted to him I actually think I've got feelings for you. Now, bring on

last week, they got married, they got a baby. Wow. Like, this is classic, in the book world, enemies to lovers. I didn't know that this was a big... Huge trope. A trope, yeah. Yeah, it'll be like the school bully. And the nerd girl.

And they've fought their whole lives, and they meet each other later in life, and they're like, hey man, how are you? All that kind of stuff. But this is what we want to know this morning. Were you and your partner in an enemies to lovers situation where like you met in a bad way or you didn't like each other,

maybe you hated each other? The first impression was like, this guy's a dick. Yeah, or something like this. You were involved in a terrible accident or they were rude to you. Yeah. And then later Yeah, or something like this. You were involved in a terrible accident and all that. Maybe they were rude to you. Yeah. And then later on, you ended up together.

We had a message in already. Yeah, somebody messaged in. Ben messaged in. Hi, Ben. I broke up with my wife. Her sister hated me. She wouldn't even say a word to me and always started trouble.

Now I'm married to the sister. Have a good one. Ben. Ben. I love it. I love it. What is that shit with the family? You have a good one, Ben. Ben! I love it, I love it. What is that shit with the family? You have a good one, Ben.

With the wife, so you've married two. And then would you see the wife, you'd see the ex at Christmas, right? Yeah. I wish there was a big whole family for that. Yeah, but if you didn't, that's the thing, they hate each other and now they love each other. Okay, 0800 DALS at M, we want to take your calls, text through 9696.

Were you and your partners, no, were you and your partner in an enemies to lovers situation? There was a couple that are now married with a child, but they met when he hit her with his car and she broke her collarbone. Probably on his phone, not paying attention. Yeah, it's probably not a great first impression. No. But hey, it's all worked out. I guess you'd just be doing the driving

in that relationship then. Oh, I would never be a passenger. Yeah. I'd be like, no, remember? Remember? And he'd be like, yeah. Also, yeah, she'd be throwing that in his face

every argument forever. Oh yeah, God, yeah. So message is in. I hated my ex-partner before we got together. Maybe you do now too. As you said, ex. Full circle.

He was cocky as hell and irritated the hell out of me. Could not stand him. We weirdly got stuck together one night while our friends ditched. Ended up in a relationship for nine years. I'm back to hating him now, though. There you go. Yeah.

Full circle. Full circle. Not my partner at the moment, but my previous adult fun time buddy. We disliked each other and never caught the feels, but the adult fun times was incredible. And we wouldn't have even probably had a convo. We'd just do the date and leave. It was hot. Sometimes you just find a king, you know?

Yeah. Was boarding at uni. Flatmate was a guy I would never have dated. I moved just do the date and leave. It was hot. Sometimes you just find a king, you know? Yeah. Was boarding at uni. Flatmate was a guy I would never have dated. I moved countries one year until my degree. Came back to New Zealand the year after and we started chatting on text. 20 years later, we're married with four kids. Whoa! Four kids?

Yeah. My now husband was a dick who thought he was a man. I went out with him to sleep with him and tell people how bad he was in bed to really humble him and bring him down. Wow. Jokes on me. Two kids later, we're married for 15 years. He is a great man.

And a great lover, obviously. Yeah. My partner and I went from enemies to lovers. We actually dated when we were 19 and the relationship ended on bad terms. We didn't talk for 10 years. Had kids to other people, et cetera. Then he randomly added me on Facebook three years ago. I was single at the time and he was recently single.

The rest is history. We now have a two-year-old and we're getting married in two weeks. Oh. Jeepers. See, things can turn around. It's wild, eh? Yeah. Wild.

Let's have some more next. You hated each other at first or it was a bad first impression and then it turned into love. A lot of messages. Some of which are just outrageous. Yeah. Like real bad ones. That we won't read Yeah. Like, real bad ones that we won't read

out, and then some other ones. We met in a situation where our mutual friends set us up, did not vibe at all. One month later, we met under different circumstances and hit it off. Six months later, I was pregnant, we'd been together for nine years, got two kids. This guy used to be mean to me at school. He was very hung up on himself. I actually fancied

his older brother, but then he asked me out and I said, yes, even though I didn't like him, I thought it would only last one week. Six years later, we're married and have two kids. Jesus. That taught him. Also, is the older brother still hot? Yeah, and also didn't say like,

I'm so happy with this outcome. Just kind of like, well, fast forward. Just assume they are. Yeah. I hated him. My cleaning company did his cleaning for his construction company. I was hired by the manager who was his friend.

Backstory, I used to be the waitress at his local pub and I never served him because I thought he was hot and he was awkward. He thought I was a biatch. Two years after contract cleaning for his company, he finally finds out that I'm the cleaner. He's like, why the F is this pub girl on my site? He peed me off so bad one day he paid me late. I made him go home and pay me on New Year's Eve

in the office. Finally one day my friend set up at the house and we didn't know that each other were going to be there. Turns out even though we hate each other, we had a deep attraction eight years later for kids. What? Okay, didn't see that one coming. I was like, wait, he's not paying you. You refuse to serve him. He thinks

you're a biatch. You're working for him and now you're married. Wow. My husband and his ex were friends of mine. I always thought he was you refuse to serve him he thinks you're a biatch you're working for him and now you're married wow my husband and his ex were friends of mine I always thought he was a bit much anyway long story short we're now happily married

after 15 years in which a gay world is like a lifetime oh wow that's like yeah that's like 45 straight years yeah yeah yeah incredible

or 60 even maybe even longer when my mum and dad were married my mum could not stand this one friend of my dad's she would call my gran and complain that my dad was out with his friend

and she just wanted nothing to do with him. Then my parents got divorced and a couple of years later, my mum married that friend. And I've now been married for 23 years. Oh, wow. And my brother is 22. Wild. Wow.

Who knew? Who knew that people, you never know. You never knew. The person you might hate, oh, the brother's still very, very hot. They just messaged him. Oh, that's awkward at Christmas isn't it? Oh gosh. The hot one. Hot people at Christmas

it's just been so hot. Is six years and two kids too long for Leapfrog? Leapfrog the brother to get to the hotter brother? Especially while he's hot. Six years is a lot of time to get a lot of investment into it now. Yeah. This dick and I were pinned against each other in every PE class. Pitted against each other maybe? Yeah, it said pinned against each other in every PE class.

Pitted against each other maybe? Yeah, it said pinned against each other. Oh, pitted, yeah. Pinned against each other. We were capped in opposite teams. That's when we met and literally fell in love. I still smash him at basketball. That was 2001, still married.

Wow. That's the jocks. The jocks, Adam. The jocks, Adam. The jocks fell in love. Yeah. Hey, guys, apparently being the company's most successful podcast isn't enough. They want us to tell people to tell more of their friends.

So people are clearly liking it, but we have to tell them to tell others to like it. I would concentrate more on the shitter podcasts that the company makes. Yeah, same. You know, the real losers out there. No, no, no. We'll just... Yeah. Maybe we won't say nice.

Maybe we should even encourage people to listen to other podcasts that the company makes. Oh, no, but only after ours. Yeah, nah, nah, don't do that. And not more than ours. Give us a sexy little review, though. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.