ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 26th May 2023

Episode Date: May 25, 2023

Top 6: Jeff Bezos  Haylien News!   Silly Little Poll!   Final Rankings!  When Didn't you know your own Strength? Hayleys On-Set IBS   Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Thanks to McCafe. Great things are brewing, one cup at a time. Good morning, welcome to the show, Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. It's two minutes past six. Happy Friday. Oh my gosh, so excited.

Even though I'm working Saturday, Sunday for the next three weeks. I just reminded Hayley she doesn't have a Friday. Oh. Yeah. But I have a life. Oh. Yeah. But I have a life and aspirations. Yeah. But, man, Fridays are pretty good too. Oh, I want Fridays.

I want latkeys with my boys. We had brunch without you yesterday. I know. You sent me a photo. Thanks for that. It was really fun for me. Yeah. It was pretty good Latke's yesterday

Yeah Sorry about that We missed you We missed you We missed you Do you miss me? I mean you're on the screen You paused too long

No no no I do I do I was trying to think Of what happened On our walk to Latke's And it was funny We were walking And we hear this

This flash car And I'm like, what a penis. And then I looked at him, it was Mike Hosking. And then he was in this real flash Porsche, real flash Porsche. And he was like, and then he tried to go around this like. Poor person. Poor person in a family mover. And guess what?

They changed lanes too and blocked him. And it was just like, viva la revolution. Yeah, it was so great. And then he was everywhere. He tried to get around this person. This little Toyota was just like, no, no, no. Oh, my God, I love that person. And then they got stuck in traffic.

He was just stuck. And it was like, ah, ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. It must be so degrading to spend that much money on a car and just be stuck in traffic like everybody else. Yes, I know. It was so great to watch, wasn't it? Oh, I wish I had seen that. Yeah, you would have loved it.

You would have loved it. You and your green party jumper would have loved it. Yes, yes. You would have frothed it. Coming up on the show, the top six, Jeff Bezos. Yes, the top six reasons Jeff Bezos' fiancee fell in love with him. Because they're engaged. They're engaged.

They met in 2019 after he separated, although I call crossover. There's a bit of overlap. Yeah, there was overlap. Classic overlap. People won't admit to the overlap. Monkey barring. You don't let go of one bar until you've got a hold of another, do you? Yeah.

That's right. That's right. I'm glad you listen to these dating terms I bring up. Because sometimes I feel like it's falling on deaf ears. Oh, absolutely. I'm cataloging every one of them. I find them very important. His incredible wealth won't be one of the reasons?

Yeah, because I feel like that would be a big lure. You two. First of all, how dare you? Secondly, how dare you? And thirdly, how dare you? Oh, okay. The top six is coming up. Next on the show, there's a new ride-sharing app.

This is only in America at this stage. And you know, when you make a new app or a new business, you've got to have a point of difference. Of course. You know, like, what's your point of difference? A USP, your unique selling point. Yes. Well, this ride-sharing app has a USP, a unique selling point.

And it's as American as you can get. It's next. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Well, there's a new ride-sharing app in America. This is As American as it Gets. And it's a unique selling point. It's a difference with other ride-sharing apps like Uber.

And in America, they've got Lyft as well. Ride? Is that one called Ride? I think so, yeah. You can hire this. It's already had 80,000 downloads. It's not for everybody, and it's not in every state by the looks,

but in Atlanta, Black Wolf allows riders to request armed drivers. So your rideshare driver will be back in. Are you going to have to tip them if they're going to be part of your drive-by, though. I don't know if you can just get them to do a drive-by. It would be great if you were going to pick up some drugs.

Yeah, watch me. Cover me, Uber driver. And yeah, they've got a gun, and so it's the first ever kind of... I've never heard of this being done before. That's insane. Is it aimed at people who might need more protection than others or is it just for cool points?

Apparently Atlanta has a bit of a crime wave going on at the moment so people are feeling quite unsafe. But yeah, apparently it's aimed more at celebrities, corporate executives, high wealth... But celebrities aren't catching Ubers. They've got drivers. Well, yeah, but now they can have a driver with a gun. No, but they've got private drivers.

Not always. I'll be your private driver. With a gun in my hand. Could you imagine being an Uber driver and picking up a celeb? That would be weird. Yeah, you'd be like, what, are you falling on hard times? I mean, Taylor Swift obviously doesn't get an Uber driver and picking up a celeb, that would be weird. Yeah, you'd be like, what, are you falling on hard times? I mean, like, Taylor Swift obviously doesn't get an Uber, but there'd be like lower, you know, minor celebs that would Uber

all the time. But yeah, the service offers armed drivers, unarmed drivers, and school shuttle drivers. And yeah, more for corporate execs, high net worth individuals, celebrities, women, school kids, and regular people who want peace of mind. So that'd be me. I get hounded when I'm in my Audi.

Yeah, I know you do. Constantly people taking photos. I'm like, please, I'm just trying to pick up my kids. And apparently they're trying to hire like ex-cops, ex-military kind of people. Works famously well. Works famously well in America when it comes to guns. Yeah. People who have suffered PTSD on the job Are again thrust into stressful situations

You could call them trigger happy You know Yeah So apparently there's some stats here about the Because you're off to America so Correct Some stats about homicides Oh what are you doing

Tell me about homicides I'm not going to Atlanta The top five worst cities for homicides. Number one, Atlanta, where this ride share app has started. Detroit's not there. Baltimore, Detroit is third. Las Vegas. Yeah.

And because of all the gambling and the drug debts. Yeah, I bet. I bet. And Kansas City. Those are the top five worst cities. Yeah. Jeez, we're not in Kansas anymore, Toto. We're certainly not. Kansas is supposed to be like the all- city. Yeah. Jeez, we're not in Kansas anymore. No, toe. We're certainly not.

Kansas is supposed to be like the all-American. Yeah. Okay, guns. Guns, yeah, guns. Guns, guns, guns. They love guns. They love guns. 12 minutes past six.

Next on the show. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. So this is some Danish research that was trying to look at the impact of looking at food. Now, if you've seen my Instagram, because, you know, yours is all gym bra stuff, Fletch. I don't have a single photo of me at the gym. Yours is all ethnically ambiguous models. Sorry, what are we talking about? Where is this?

Wait, are we talking about who we follow or like? I'm just saying if you look on your Instagram feeds. No, I don't have a single photo at the gym. You are a gym bra. And I don't follow gym bras. You're a gym bra. No, it doesn't. Whereas I'm cats and food.

Vaughn, you're... Yeah, I went two pictures down. Yep, slightly brown women. I mean, just absolutely brown women. Oh, wow. Yeah, either absolutely or slightly brown. I mean, just absolutely brown women. Oh, wow. Yeah, either absolutely or slightly brown. I mean, we know. What I'm saying is no shades of white.

Yeah, no. There's enough white. If we're in the bedroom, there's enough. Well, not me and you, but I'm just saying if I'm in the bedroom, there's enough white. Yeah. I've got that taken care of. Especially when you take your pants off.

Exactly. A very white bottom. A very white bottom. A very white bottom. Very white bottom. So I've got to, obviously, balance things out. Of course, of course, of course. Well, they were looking at whether or not just staring at photos of food would help suppress your appetite for that food.

But for some reason, my Instagram is so food heavy. Like I follow so many food, cooking, baking, all sorts, pages. And it just makes me want it more. So they did research. Yeah, right. They got a thousand participants. They split them in two groups. They were either shown pictures of delicious food once or 30 times during a period of time.

And they found the more that people looked at the photos of delicious food, the less they felt like they actually needed to eat it. So I just followed a restaurant that I really want to go to. We could all go as well at some stage. And, yeah, they keep posting meals, and it's not making me. No, it doesn't. It just makes me want to go. It certainly doesn't satiate my hunger. No, it just makes me want to go so bad.

It makes my cravings deeper. Yeah. That's like sometimes if I'm being a little, if I'm trying to, you know, be a good girl and maybe jump back on the journey to health, I'll unfollow pages for a while because I'll be like, oh, my God, no, I just want that big, fat, cheesy scone with butter dripping from the side now. Yum. And I won't stop until I get it.

Yeah. I manifest it and then I make it happen. So I don't know. Maybe the Danish are a stranger breed because, for me, looking at photos makes me want the food even more. They have good pastries in Danish land. They're famous in...

They're so good they named it after them. They did, yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley from the bustling ZM think tank. This is the Top 6. Today's Top 6. Jeff Bezos, Jeff Bezos.

I was just adding something to my trade me watch list. Something I definitely don't need, but I just kind of want to keep an eye on it, see what happens. I could see you momentarily. That's my trade me watch list whole thing. I just add a whole lot. I wonder what that'll go for.

Just watching. No intention of buying. Top six reasons Jeff Bezos' new fiance fell in love with him and it is not the 137 billion dollars. Yeah.

Money doesn't matter to me. Money doesn't matter to me. No, I look for a good heart. Yeah. And if that good

heart is worth 137.8 billion US dollars, it'd be better if that heart wasn't so good because, you know, if daddy drops off,

mum is getting a payday. So they're engaged now and she's going up in his dick rocket, eh? To space. She is going to in his next space mission. Don't look at me like that, Jared. It's a dick rocket. It's what we call it.

The Jeff Bezos. It's very phallic. It's a dick rocket. It's straight out of Austin Powers. Penile propulsion. Yes. Thing. Couldn't think of a P rocket. It's straight out of Austin Powers. Penile propulsion. Yes. Thing.

Couldn't think of a P word. I don't know if I'd go. I don't think it's ready yet. She's a former broadcast journalist who worked as an entertainment reporter and news anchor. I did not know this. According to reports, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos and Lauren got engaged in May 2023 after four years of relationship. Crossover. It was definitely crossover.

Some crossover. Some crossover. All these years planting a tree on Earth Day, like every other thing that that company's doing, not slightly destroying the Earth. But anyway, we digress. Top six reasons Jeff Bezos' new fiancé fell in love with him, and it's not the money number six.

She enjoys how quickly Amazon shipping gets her goods to her door. Of course. Who doesn't? In America, they get there very, very quickly. Those Amazon boxes, a big pile of them. People are like, yay, yay, yay, yay, yay. Number five on the list of the top six reasons Jeff Bezos' new fiance fell in love with him and it's not the money.

Loves bald men. Who doesn't? Yeah. We're sexy. It's a solar power. For the sex machine. Yes, it's a solar panel for a sex machine. Yeah, hot. That's what a mug says. It's on a mug solar panel for a sex machine. Yeah, hot.

That's what a mug says. That's on a mug. I saw that on T-shirts growing up. That's not a bald spot. That's a solar panel for the sex machine. Number four on the list of the top six reasons your fiancé loves him and it's not the money. If that huge penis rocket was anything to go by,

Jeff's packing. Jeff's packing. Yeah, rocket up in the sky, rocket up in the money. If that huge penis rocket was anything to go by, Jeff's packing. Jeff's packing. Rock it up in the sky, rock it up in the trousers. No tucking that thing under the waistband, that's for sure. God, no, you'd see the top. It'd be coming out the top up by his throat.

Come through the neck of his shirt. Is that a necktie, Jeff? Whoa! Number three on the list of his shirt Number Is it a necktie Jeff? Whoa Number three on the list Of the top six reasons Jeff Bezos' new fiance Fell in love with him

It's not the money She thought for a moment She was meeting up with Jeff Bridges The dude Oh yeah He's sexy Yeah sexy old man He's a sexy old man

He's got cancer at the moment No I'm thinking of What who am I thinking of? Jeff Bridges had cancer From the That was in the old man TV of... Who am I thinking of? Jeff Bridges had cancer. That was in the Old Man TV show. Yeah, yeah. Has it come back?

No, no. It's going really well, his treatment. Oh, good, good, good. Because he shrunk a lot. It shrunk a lot. He paused that show halfway through to do the cancer treatment, and he comes back and they've finished filming it. Great show. Fantastic show.

If you haven't seen it, The Old Man. I think it kind of ended with a season two possibility. Yeah, absolutely. And I just watched The Big Lebowski recently. Oh, he's so great. Oh, good. Wait for the first time. Yeah.

I'd never seen it. I don't know what I was expecting, but I was a bit like, oh, okay. When it ended, I was like, right, okay. I just thought more would happen. And then it was like by the Coen brothers. I'm like, oh, no. I just thought more would happen. And then it was like, by the Coen brothers. I'm like, oh, no, famously. Yeah. Famously.

Number two on the list of the top six reasons Jeff Bezos' new fiance fell in love with him and it's not the money. She wants to be the son of Ted Jorgensen, who was an American unicycle hockey player and president of the world's first unicycle hockey club. What? Wait, what? Jeff Bezos' dad. Yep. and president of the world's first unicycle hockey club. What? You play hockey on unicycles? Jeff Bezos' dad, his parents separated when he was 17 months old. His dad was a bit too fond of the booze

and not fond enough of his wife and child. But his father's name was Ted Jorgensen and he was an American unicycle hockey player. He plays hockey on a unicycle and the president of the world's first unicycle hockey club. I think maybe the world's only unicycle world hockey club. You need to have a strong core.

You've got to have a strong core. Yeah, but it'll still be strong. Even in rigor mortis. It's as hard as anything. Stronger. It doesn't get harder than rigor mortis. When you die, your abs, oh, the best they've ever been

Yeah Popping Popping Tight And number one on the list Of the top six reasons Jeff Bezos' new fiance Fell in love with him

And it's not the money It's his kind and caring heart That extends to not Not only to his family But how well his employees Are treated And how he always Puts people before profit

Yeah oh that See what a beautiful Yeah It's why we all love our bank. Yeah, a lot of toilet breaks for Amazon workers. All of the toilet breaks you could ever want. That is today's Top 6. I've got some Haley-an news.

Oh, here we go. Hey, open your mind, she-pottle. I've got some alien news. Oh, here we go. Hey, open your mind, sheeple. Okay. My mind is open, shepherd. This is less sort of hoobly-doobly and more science-based, so stay with me. But it's inspired by the aliens now we have as a planet as planet earth

we have received our first in quotations alien message from Mars what's the journey from Mars from Mars

I thought we'd written that off did I stutter shipple no so what this is right is this actually an experiment it's sort of a piece of Did I stutter? Shibble? No. So what this is, right, is this is actually an experiment. It's sort of a piece of, what are they calling it? Like world theatre.

Where basically we've set up a device that would allow other planets to make contact with us. And this has been a long time coming and we've finally received the message which is proving that it would work. But that's assuming that other species or alien life would have the technology that's compatible with ours, wouldn't it? What if it's an international trail cam and it's just, you know, it's activated by motion so all they need to do is move in front of it.

But what if they've got this technological thing and it's like using the next thing after USB-C? Well, they're doing it in a way that... Because a lot of us are still on... Can't charge it. They're doing it in a way that they would be able to receive any kind of jumbled or jambled or coded sort of code, and then we would have to then decode it.

Right. So basically it's a test run for humans just in case. Where a spacecraft has been orbiting Mars and listening for signals and then it's done a simulation where it then would transmit that to Earth and Earth has to decode it. Wow, someone resurrected Alan Turing. This is a test, right? Yeah, it's a simulation of the first contact with an alien species so that when

it does happen, which it will sheeple, we're ready for it and we have the means to receive it. Because basically it is trying to create a type of technology that would be able to handle anything that they gave us. Because as you say, they're not

going to be using computers and English that they gave us. Because as you say, they're not going to be using computers and English and all of that. Yeah. So it's a kind of satellite that can pick up all sorts of different signals from a planet, send it to Earth, and then it's for us to decode. How good would it be if they did just speak English? They're like, hey, dudes.

That would be quite easy. Yeah. It would be so much easier. They've been watching us for years, maybe. Yes. And they're learning our languages. They come down, they're like, what's up? And you're like, oh, not much.

And they're like, no cap. This planet's busting. Back, back, back, back. You can say rat and gnarly, dude, but you can't be bussing no cat. No, you can't be. You can't be. So it happened yesterday that we received the transmission, and now it's available to the public to have a crack at decoding it, basically. They've open sourced it. Yeah.

But it's a test, and it's not even alien. Yeah, I know, but it's a practice run. Right, okay. Do we win a prize if we decipher it? Is there a prize? Yeah, you get a giant teddy bear. Okay. How giant?

It seems like a prize. Giant, giant? These people can get a thing to order Mars. I'm expecting a huge teddy bear. I was reading a stat in a news story. I don't know how correct this was, but it was something like 90-odd percent of UFO sightings. This is my second part of my Haley and News,

is this will be very exciting for America. Because, yeah, that stat was 92% of UFO sightings have taken place in America. Now, take from that what you will. What does that say? What does that say? What does that say? More meth usage or more kind of

mind-altering drug usage? It can be as simple as an oxygen deprivation, can't it? Or a carbon dioxide poisoning. Yeah, it can be. When you open your windows often enough,

it can lead to the brain playing funny tricks. Or just, you know, they see stars differently to we see them and then they think they're UFOs.

But yeah, almost 100% basically of UFO sightings have taken place in the USA. And then in particular areas more so than others. So there's a little list of where these UFO sightings have happened. Italy's number

10, Portugal number 9, France number 8, 7th is Spain, 6th the Netherlands, Ireland, a lot of drugs in these places. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ireland, number five. Germany, number four. Booze.

Sausages. Top three is United Kingdom in three. Yep. And they mostly see light. Right. Canada with... Too much maple syrup. Yeah.

5,696 viewings. Wow. They see light as well. That's number two. And number one, so number two has about 6,000 views. Yeah. And number one, USA with 126,000.

Oh my God. All of the drugs. Fentanyl. All of them. Yeah, and most of them are just light. Yeah, which is quite easily explained, right? Lots of lights in the sky. Russia should be seeing the most, right? Because it's got the biggest land mass. Russia's busy. Yeah, which is quite easily explained, right? Lots of lights in the sky. Russia should be seeing

the most, right? Because it's got the biggest land mass. Russia's busy. Yeah. Russia's got a lot going on. They're looking at other things. They're seeing lights

and things flying through the sky as well. It's the Ukrainian freedom fighter. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Fletchvorn and Hayley Silly little pole

Silly little pole It is so silly, silly, silly Today's silly little poll I just asked AI. This is about if you've ever used AI. I've used, I use it very sparingly. Silly. Yeah.

Sillyly. Silly. Fun times. Yeah, fun stuff. I just asked, tell me a funny joke about AI and AI said, why did AI go on a diet?

Why? Because it had too many bites. Oh, that's lame. But that's more of a computer. Yeah, I don't think it's a comedy. Tell me a joke about the fact, why did the fat computer go on a diet? Because it had too many bites. Oh, that's lame. But that's more of a computer. Yeah, I don't think it's a comedy. Why did the fat computer go on a diet? Because it had too many bites.

But now it's funny because we're imagining a fat computer. A fat computer. I don't think AI is a comedy yet. No, there was, you know, this year in the International Comedy Festival, one show was written entirely by AI. And how was it? Was it good? I didn't see it.

That sounds terrible. Lazy. What comedian absolutely nailed the laziness this year? Yeah, perfect. So have you used AI? We asked you. 30% yes. 40% not yet. 30% not interested.

I haven't used it. The yes and the not interested are the same, but not yet. People are curious about it. If I worked in a job, in an office job, and I've talked to friends... If you worked in a job, if you had a job... If I had a job... A real job. If you had a property. Where I had to just be typing all day

and coming up with press releases or whatever, I would 100% use it. I've talked to friends that have done this, and it is doing, like, huge amounts of work for them. Yeah, wasn't there one industry that's really under fire as, like, policy? You know, people that, like, look through contracts and policies and stuff,

because you can just upload a contract to AI, and it will go through and go, yeah, that's a pretty good contract. Yeah. Someone just text messaged in. Yeah. They've used their Snapchat AI because if you open Snapchat now, it's got an AI. Yeah.

And I think it's maybe a bit more like up to date because if you're using the free version of chat GPT, it's backdated to like 2019 or 2020 maybe. You've got to pay to use the most recent, right? The most advanced. But the Snapchat AI is a bit more up to date. And they said they've used it for sports betting and it works. What do you mean? Who's most likely to score first this weekend in the Hurricanes?

Because it would just put up all the odds, wouldn't it? Because it just goes and it works out the stats for you. It's going to give you the most likely, but their odds are not going to be the greatest. Well, no, that's gambling, isn't it? Yeah. If you were to ask it. But I don't think we should be relying on AI to gamble. No. Well, no, that's gambling, isn't it? Yeah. But if you were to ask it, like, what's what's... Yeah, but I don't think we should be relying on AI to gamble.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I just hadn't even thought of it for a possibility. Yeah, but because it would literally go through all the data and spit you out the best. Put me, if you're in a fantasy league, fantasy football, NRL, whatever, you could ask it, you know, who's going to be the best bet this weekend

for chunking up some big points? That's crazy. Crazy. And somebody else said, my friend, you Snapchat AI for multiple choice exam. Copy and paste the question and the AI tell them the answer. They got 100%. That's bad.

Yeah. How are you allowed your Snapchat? Well, it's probably one of those exams that's at home on the open exam. Open book. Bloody hell. Then if it's an open book, you'll find the answer anyway, right?

Some feedback. Isabella said, for uni, it's been an absolute lifesaver during exams, so there's a future doctor right there, ladies and gentlemen.

Renee says, don't encourage the robots. Okay. Okay, Renee. I kind of agree with Renee, though. This is only going to lose people their jobs, right? Yeah, but also, we're not going to have smart people. Yeah.

You're not actually learning something. You're just getting information and putting it down and then leaving. Yeah. And there's been so many movies where this happens. Yeah, there's one that passed into my mind, WALL-E. Yeah. We left that robot to clean up the planet, and we just became lazy slobs on a spaceship. Nah, I'm scared, says The Nail Glade.

Their Instagram account replied. I'm in charge of assessment authenticity at a high school. Too scared what I might discover if I start using AI. Yeah. You've got to be on Humber. I mean, I think, like, you know When a kid Isn't the smartest And they're coming in With an A plus essay

I think it's a fair Yeah How'd that happen overnight Yeah how'd that happen Like that's AI Obviously Someone said My husband asked them

To make a song about potatoes This is great This is the sort of thing I use it for Potatoes potatoes We sing to thee A love for you Will never cease to be

In stews and soups And salads and pies You always make Our taste buds rise Potatoes. Yeah, potatoes. The potato song. Right, okay. There's a lot happening there. I chose not interested, but more like you should have had an option called too scared,

because AI is crazy. Yeah. I'm on the hunt for a new job and I used AI to write my cover letter. So I've actually seen a lot of articles about this in the last few weeks about, yeah, people that will really tailor the AI, like they'll put into AI, here's the job, here's the company.

Here's their statement of what they said about it. And it spits out the most perfect cover letter. Yeah. But you're shaking your head, Hayley. It's just not right. Here you go. This is one for you, Sproul. Mark used one to get out of a parking ticket.

Great success. Oh, yes. But always use pleased and thank you. AI will remember. So when you finish with AI, you say, thank you, AI. Thank you, AI. Don't kill me later. Yeah.

Yeah, remember me is one of the good ones. Kat said we were shown at a professional development course, and since then I've used it to plan like five different activities for my students. So the teachers went to AI. So another way people are using it is travel. Like you could be like, I'm going to Europe for two weeks or a month. What do I do? Plan me the ultimate itinerary.

And apparently it's like coming out with the most amazing itineraries. Yeah. Don't we want to have ideas of our own? Yeah, but I do take time. Yeah. I do take time. I'm a teacher. But if you don't keep exercising your brain,

we're just going to be like big drongos. We can exercise it doing things we like, though. Yeah. Like, if you're going around Europe, that's fine.

You look, you get excited about your trip, you're playing your things you want to do, get some suggestions from AI, but don't rely on it. No. If you're a teacher

and you, for example, like this person, who needs to write regular emails to parents about their children's awful attitudes at school and misbehaving. It's a lifesaver when you have to delicately phrase things. Imagine school reports.

Write a school report for Vaughan who doesn't pay attention in class. Make it. Boom. Yeah. Make it nice. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. So in the most unsubtle way, Rihanna, pregnant at the moment, huge superstar.

Yes. She shared a video of her feet walking. Oh, you didn't give those away for free. I know. People would pay top dollar for a little bit of re-re's. Foot, foot, foot. Well, our very own Hayley Sproul, you're on a feet website. Yeah, let's have a look at WikiFeet and just see if there's any updates.

WikiFeet, because I'll go on there and see what they say about Rihanna. WikiFeet. Hayley Sproul. Producers, Fletch is waving at you. Hello. I want to come to them for an opinion on this because I find this...

What, feet? No, this, what Rihanna was wearing on her feet. Oh, gotcha. Now, I'm still sitting at a four out of five for nice feet. So that's pretty good. How did this website get your feet? Only one person said that they're ugly. I don't know.

They just go on your Instagram and anytime you've got a bare foot, they screenshot it and then they put it up. Rihanna's got five out of five feet. Beautiful feet. US size 10 they reckon. I'm a US size 10. Is she? Yeah, but Rihanna's not as tall as you. Right, well five out of five feet unlike Hayley Sproul who has four

out of five. That one person is going to stay with you all day, isn't it? She's got sort of, she's got a similar big toe to me, but her second and third toes aren't as long as mine. Oh, yeah, my second and third toes are like fingers. I can peel a banana. But it's what she was wearing on her feet that's got the internet like...

Yeah, so she had a beautiful stiletto on with a diamante anklet thing. I'm looking at that exact picture on wiki feet. Yeah. As you started describing it, I was like, that's what she's wearing. Man, they don't mess around. Wiki feet. Straight up there. Straight on. Black heels, strappy heels with a diamante ankle strap.

But it's what is on her middle toe that has people talking. It is a toe ring. Startable. Ew. But it has a massive diamond on it. Like. Like, that would be more expensive than most people's, like, wedding It would be, right? It's huge. Oh my god

No, like, the size of, like, a bloody 20 cent coin. It is huge. I just something about, like, I don't know, Eva like, I don't even wear rings. I find them, ugh. Like, they get caught and, I don't know, you just grip things and then it hurts. Yeah

I don't know, maybe you're used to wearing it hurts. Maybe you're used to wearing your... I haven't worn my wedding ring for ages but that is a fat finger incident. That's because he wants to be. I'm DTF. So I took mine off. I couldn't even sleep with it on. Like I'd take mine off every night.

It was too much. I don't like them on. Some people sleep in them and that's... But toe rings, I just find them so... Just even the thought of it just makes me go... I feel like 10 years ago I wanted to be a toe ring girl. You know, like I really wanted to. But I can feel it and it makes me gross. 10 years ago was 2013.

Yeah. Do you mean 20 years ago? No. Sometimes I say 10 years ago and I mean 20 years ago. No, probably like 15 years ago. Okay, so 2008 toe ring, semi-acceptable. We had exited white guys with dreads territory by then. But are we going back into toe ring fashion?

Is it becoming fashionable now? Producers, what do we think? Yuck. Wow, and you're from Napier and you find that yuck. Oh my gosh. That's amazing, isn't it? I would have thought she would have been hard on the toe ring. Yeah, I think I'm anti-toe ring, but I'm pro-anklet.

So I feel like that's back now. What do you mean pro-anklet? Anklets are cute. What's an ankle? A bagel for the ankle. I've got one if I put my leg up. A bracelet for the ankle. Yeah, that's what I thought you meant.

Okay, wow. Have you just been to Thailand or something and met a backpacker and fallen in love and will never cut these off? It's a friendship anklet. What's it made of? Just like yarn. Ooh, it'll get wet. It'll get wet.

Bet that stinks. Ooh. Yeah, probably. Bet that stinks. How long has it been on for? Six months. It's coming off next week for Radio Awards.

Cut it off. Yuck. That is disgusting. You think it's coming off but it's sentient now It's got a mind of its own You can try to cut it off and it'll be like No I cut you off You can't embarrass us like that It's like a crawling plant

You know how they put their roots into the walls and stuff It's done that You should have heard me when I came back from India Because I came back from India and I wanted all the jingle jangles And I had like bell anklets and all sorts And it gets annoying. I sort of feel for cats that have a bell around their neck

because it haunts you, it follows you. Were you in the public eye when you came back from India and you were appropriating the culture? Yeah, I sure was. You were? Yikes.

I'm surprised you survived the cancellation. Yeah, I know. Well, I've just aired it on air, so come at me. Good luck, Bella Hadid. Doesn't she famously appropriate culture? Is it the Hadids?

They're like, this week I'm Japanese. It's like, you are not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you're not. We do this every Friday. We rank things. It's normally food, because yum. Yeah. It is today.

Deli meats. So you're standing at the deli at the supermarket. Yep. And you have to pick your top three meats. Deli meats. Now, is there a criteria? What are we buying it for? Like, is it lunch?

No, you're buying it to yum yum. Just yum yum out of the bag. No, just yum yum. We're just yum yuming straight out of the bag. No, just yum-yum. We're just yum-yumming straight out of the bag. You get a little plastic bag and you yum-yum. You imagine you're a little peckish, you open the fridge, and you go into your plastic bag

and you just yum-yum, yum-yum. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. Because you can't go past shaved ham, like champagne ham, right? That's surely we're all on board. That's your number one. And you always have that for your buns. But that's why I was asking asking because is there a price limit?

But wait, are we also doing, are we doing like stuffed olives and potato salads? No, no, no. We're not. Just meats. Are they a meat? Have you got those ears painted on? Fletcher. Fall in line, son.

Wow. Well, you know, I'm just saying they're available at the deli. No, we'll save those for another day. We're deli meat. Yeah, we'll call that deli pottles. Deli pottles. It goes in a pottle at the deli. No, we'll save those for another day. We're deli meat. We'll call that deli pottles. It goes in a pottle at the deli. Okay. But this is bags.

So no cheeses, just meats. Just meats. So you do bring up a good point, but we've got generally there's two options for when it comes to shaved ham. You've got the shratnil ham, which is just like... Or you've got like leg ham and it's the whole slice

and it's all the way through. So you've got the rind and the lovely fat on the outside and it's glazed. I think we should call that sliced ham and we'll go with the blah, blah, blah one as shaved ham. Okay, sliced ham. Yes. Sliced ham over shaved ham.

Now that's not ham on a bone, is it? That's different. Oh my God, no. But it's off the bone. That's the whole thing. not ham on a bone, is it? That's different. Oh, my God. No. But it's off the bone. That's the whole thing. Yeah. It's off the bone. It's cut off the bone.

Okay. Yeah. I'm going to go. I'll kick us off because mine's quite simple. Okay. Champagne shaved ham as in the tattered crap. Trash. Love it.

Number one. I love a bit of texture. That's my number one. You're trash. You're both trash. You're slimy trash. I find the sliced one is a bit slimy. No, I find the sliced one's too slimy.

It's too perfect. Yeah, you're right. The sliced ones are slimy. The champagne ham is drier. The sliced one you can turn into blah, blah, blah, blah, by tearing it up. But you can't turn blah, blah, blah, blah, back into sliced ham.

You're so slimy. Well, we're all entitled to our own opinions. Champagne, champagne is number one. Am I allowed to get mustard? No. You're going to get it dry. we're all entitled to our own opinions. Champagne-shaved hams, number one. Am I allowed to get mustard? No. In a dry... Your condiments are on your own time. We're just talking...

We're getting the fun details. But if I'm at home and I'm eating it out of a bag, my condiments are there. I do wait to get home. I'm hooning in the car. I'm hooning in the bag, but you guys also said this is for the purpose of purchase because it's in a bag in the fridge.

Okay, so what's your number one? Champagne-shaved hams, number one. Yep. Number two, I'm going to go an Italian salami. Now that's usually simply your Verkirks, but it's quite nice. Number three, I'm controversial here, I would go a black

pepper chicken. Now some A black pepper chicken? What do you mean? There's no black pepper chicken. We're not at Faro Fresh money bags. No, I'm not at Faro Fresh. Countdown does it, and A New World, where it's like a shaved chicken, quite almost fake chicken. Oh, my God, yum.

Almost luncheon, but not luncheon. Yes, yum. But it's got a black pepper rim. And when I was on the diet days, I used to just buy that and be like, hum, hum, hum. It's like a champagne ham, but it's champagne chicken. Yeah, you're right. That's yum.

Thank you. That's my top three. Yeah, good from you. I've never seen thinly sliced chicken. Yeah, it's yum. You ain't living. You're not living if you haven't. That's yum. Thank you. That's my top three. Yeah, good from you. I've never seen thinly sliced chicken. Yeah, it's yum. You ain't living. You're not living if you haven't. I'm on the New World Daily page.

We've got tandoori smoked chicken, which is sliced but not thin. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I would probably go the same as you, Hayley. I'd go number one, champagne ham. Number two, a salami. Yum. And then number three, I'd probably just for like the retro school days, I'd just go a classic luncheon.

You son of a bitch. Or chicken luncheon or luncheon. Just purely because it's absolutely yum. Have you had luncheon lately? No. It's disgusting. Is it? I remember fondly cutting it off and eating it and always having it on sandwiches and loving lunches again.

It is salty and it is like... Has it got less meaty? Wildly preserved. I mean, it was always... Oh, it's so sad. I haven't had it in years because I gained new respect when I hit my 30s. And if you're going to have shaved ham, I don't know why you...

Okay, price point difference. Hutton's Ham and Chicken Flavoured Luncheon, $1.60 per 100 grams. Flubba lubba lubba champagne leg ham, $2.49. Yeah, it's a bit more. It is a little bit more there. Okay, well, you've had our top three.

What's your top three? Well, I would... I'm never going to get sliced ham in the top three. This is strategic vote. Oh, okay. So I will change to champagne leg ham, but I asked about the mustard because I like that with mustard because as you said, it's drier, but the mustard adds a little bit more.

A little bit more wetness. A little bit more wetness. I'm talking a whole grain mustard. I love all mustards. We're not. DuJoy mustard. Drop the mustard. We're not here to chat about condiments. Whole grain mustard. It's not top. Weards. We're not. Deja mustard. Drop the mustard. We're not here to chat

about condiments. Whole grain mustard. It's not top. We've done condiments. It's not top. I'm just saying. It's not final rankings condiments with meats.

Then I would go, I'd never get it, but if I was going to get our chicken, I'd probably go shredded chicken. No. Ooh, that is the

driest chicken known to man. You never go shredded chicken at the deli. Are we allowed to get the quarter chickens? No, it's all the chickens they couldn't sell in the rotisserie.

So they shred them and then sell it to idiots like you the next day. That's why I never buy it, but I want chicken. Why am I buying thinly sliced shaved chicken with pepper on the rim? Because it's wet and delicious and a good diet meal. It's not going to be wet, it's sliced thinner. It's going to be drier than the chunks of chicken. I'm going to find you something to bring and it's going to turn you around because that dry shredded chicken, it's like dust in your mouth. It's not going to be wet. It's sliced thinner. It's going to be drier than the chunks of chicken. I'm going to find you something to bring and it's going to turn you around because that dry shredded chicken, it's like dust in your mouth.

It's so good. It's dust. Maybe I'll go that for number three. Yeah, thanks. We'll just go identical. And that will just be the winner, I think. Jellied beef tongue. Oh.

I don't even want it. You guys have poo-pooed everything I've said. Jellied beef tongue. Yeah, because you don't know what you're doing at the jelly. Jelly beef tongue. You're drunk. Jelly beef tongue. You're drunk.

Jelly beef tongue. I love a jelly beef tongue. You just don't know how to work a deli. Oh, salami. I would go salami, beef tongue. No, what? The juice out of the bottom of the pork. Okay, you're not taking this seriously, but we will take the salami.

You bring a brat and you show it off. And I think, Hayley, we can for final ranking, champagne ham number one, shaved champagne ham, number two, salami, number three, shaved chicken. Stop it. Stop it. Play. ZDM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Science. I've got some science. Stop it.

Science. I've got some science. Scientists have conducted a study that looked at the best time to have a little rompty-pompty, a little shake around in the shack, a little, ooh, yes, please. Some adult fun time. Some adult cuddles. Yeah, right. Cuddles.

Okay. They got a bunch of participants in long-term relationships, or, you know, not just casual flings, someone who could have the adult fun on the rig. And they got them for a long time to record when they were doing the Humpty Dumpties and how satisfying it was. And what they found from it was the most satisfying time to have a little fun in the sack was 7.30 in the morning. Now, it is 7.36.

We're six minutes late. No, you're within a window. People have done it four times by now. Is that a good old horn? What is that? No, that's okay. You're within a window. People have done it four times by now. Is that a good one? Oh, hon. What is that not good? No, that's okay. You're all good, mate.

It's not a race. Quality, not quantity. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. No, I'm not doing either. Oh, dear. Oh, sharday. It's terrible.

It's terrible. Very rarely. Overall, two-thirds of people chose doing it in the morning as the most satisfying Between 7 and 10.30 but 7.30 marked when it was like the best Is it like when people are waking up Maybe you got work at 9

Bit of brush of teeth You gonna brush your teeth beforehand It depends on how long you've been together Maybe just don't kiss I feel like you've hired them though If you're not kiss this morning. I feel like you've hired them, though, if you're not allowed to kiss them. I just feel like you're paying. Yeah, come on, not on the mouth. No, I just said, do what I push too hard there.

I haven't gone wheeze this morning yet. That sort of, you know. Oh, well, maybe you have to get up and have a teeth, a mouthwash. I also go wheeze afterwards, so you don't want to, like, totally empty yourself anyway. That's true, actually. You reserve a little. You've got to wash in a wee. You've got to wash in a wee afterwards, so you don't want to totally empty yourself anyway. That's true, actually. You reserve a little. You've got to reserve a little bit. Now, obviously, doing it releases lots of endorphins,

so it's suggested it's one of the best ways to start your day. Start in a good mood, full of energy, full of endorphins. They also think testosterone levels are generally higher in the morning and decrease during the day. So good for those with testosterone raging through their bods. It's also generally

just before people eat breakfast. So 7.45 was the optimal time for breakfast. The most common time. You want to do that before you tuck into your cereal? Oh God, no matter what. The milkies. And people say this would absolutely be the best.

There's no excuse. You're already in the bed. Yeah. You know, you don't have to go to the bed. You're just sort of hanging around. Well, there you go. Yeah. You can make the bed and deal with that later.

Yeah. Yeah. So if you're at home listening to us on your home radio. Oh, God, there's probably people that might have started already. Oh, my God. Well, don't tune us out. We don't want to be present for it. Why are you looking?

I'm looking. I'm just kind of imagining. No, don't look at them. I'm looking at them. I can see it. That's a nice move you got there, bro. Just slow it down a bit, though, Chief. Slow it down.

Slow it down. slow it down. Slow it down. Oh, my God, I told you. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. There is a WWE World Wrestling... Entertainment. Entertainment legend. His name is Big Show. Do you know him?

No, I don't. The Big Show, yep. Is his first name Paul something? He's the Big Show. Yep. Do you know him? No, I don't. The Big Show, yep. Has his first name Paul something? He's the Big Show. Yeah, Paul. He's huge. Seven foot. Yeah, Andre the Giant size.

He was involved in what I would consider the golden era of wrestling. You've got your Stone Cold Steve Austin. You've got the Rock Triple H. That sort of like turn of the millennium wrestling that was just can't be beaten. Big Show had some triumphant matches with Kane. I forget that you've got a bit of wrestling in your blood. I've got a bit of wrestling.

Yep. I like a bit of wrestling. That's how your brother met his wife. Yeah, in a wrestling chat room. That's right. Of course. Yeah. Wild.

Well, then you know him well. Big Show. Big Show. He was sharing a story of a time that, and this is funny because this is actually almost identical to a story I tell in my show. You are New Zealand's female big show, I'll say. I am. She's not small. I'm the big show of the radio industry.

Well, he was sharing a story of a time he was visiting Japan. Now, Japan, famously, a lot of things are quite small. And for Big Show, this was an issue, particularly when he was using a toilet. And this happened to me. Yeah. And he went into a cubicle toilet and he said he'd been traveling for 18 hours. He'd been trying a whole bunch of different foods. A bathroom emergency arose.

Yeah. And so he squeezed himself into this tiny little cubicle toilet in his hotel room and the walls were very close to him. Now, I've done this before, but it was to my advantage. Yeah. Unfortunately, the story for a different day. Unfortunately for him, it wasn't to his advantage because as he was, I'm going to say exploding. Yeah. He kind of braced his hands against the wall.

And because he's so huge and strong, his hands against the wall and because he's so huge and strong, his hands just went straight through the jib board. That can't have been... Toilets should never be jib lined. They should be a formica, a stronger formica lined situation. Yeah, well normally they've got a waterproofing on them, don't they?

Yeah. Well, I don't know what it was really made from. He literally put his things right against the wall. They didn't go to a hotel reception and saying, oh, sorry, I was using the toilet and I've just... I've just put my hand straight through the wall. Straight through the wall. And he'd be towering over them at reception like a giant.

Yeah. Totally. But like this kind of stuff probably happens all the time. I mean, even Aaron, I mean, he's six foot six. He's not a small man. Sometimes he'll be holding a glass of wine, telling a good story. He'll just snap the stem off. What?

Yeah, there was this one day we were having good yarns on the doorstep and he was like holding this glass of wine, getting really carried away with the story and it just snapped. And he like just put the stem down and continued holding it like a stemless glass now. He's a giant man. He doesn't know his own strength. This is what we wanted to ask this morning. If this has ever happened to you, something like this.

Yeah, where you just haven't known your own strength and you've gone, oh, just do this, and suddenly you're like, oh. Or just something was so flimsy that it broke, when it probably maybe shouldn't have. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was going to say I've broken a few office chairs, but that was probably because of just the weight thing.

Weight's its own sort of strength. And that wasn't my own. No, but I know this, like, I feel like Aaron does it often. You know, like things just aren't made for big people or strong people a lot of the time. And you just try to like pick up a something and it just snaps in half. And he's like, big head, weak item. So when didn't...

And he retreats to his cave to cry. Why big man so strong? When didn't you know your own strength? We want to take your calls this morning when you didn't know your own strength. Yeah. A lot of text messages about light bulbs. Oh, yeah, they're very fragile little things, aren't they? Yeah, especially if they've been in there for a little while.

If they're blown and you're taking the old one out and the glass might have got a bit weak and just smashing your hands. Yeah. Mike, when did you not know your own strength? Well, during high school, I was known to give really, really good high fives. And I wanted to see how good of a high five I could give him. I accidentally broke slash fractured his hand.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Because you're meant to look at the elbow, aren't you? To line it up perfectly. Yes, how you do it. The high five. But are you just a big, strong man? No, I'm six foot. I just didn't know my own strength.

Yeah, right. Maybe there wasn't enough calcium being drunk there. He has a weak ass little hand. Yeah, weak hand. A little hands. Yeah. He wasn't the biggest guy, and I felt really bad. Right. You weren't high-f, and I felt really bad. Right.

You weren't high-fiving an old lady, were you? You weren't like, give me a high-five, barrel, and then psh. The worst thing is I didn't have any feeling in my hands, so I felt no ramifications of what happened. Right. Why didn't you have feeling in your hands? We don't know. It'll come back eventually, but yeah. Well, you just lost feeling to your arm. Wait a minute, one day you just didn't have feeling in your hands? We don't know. They'll come back eventually, but yeah.

Well, you just lost feeling to your arm. One day you just didn't have feeling in your hand and you were like, I'm still going to dish out these wild high fives I've been doing hard

to people that have cost me the feeling in my hand. I'll keep going. Yeah, pretty much. Jeepers. He did. A teenage boy

with no feeling in his hand. Jesus Christ. What a weapon of mass destruction there. It's like a blood club. Jesus Christ, what a weapon of mass destruction there. It's like a blood club. Thank you, Mike. Kinsey, when did you not know your own strength?

Hi, so I was like 14. I got up in the morning and I decided, you know what? It's the weekend. I'm going to have avocado and toast. Yum. And because I'm so grown up, I'm going to do it the adult way with a knife. Yep. Oh, yeah.

Yep. So, obviously, I decided to use enough force to cut through the pip. Wait, you cut through the pip? And my hand. Did you karate chop the pip? You should never be able to get through that stone easy peasy. No. They crack sometimes, but you never can cut straight through

unless you're karate chopping it. Well, to be fair, the first two times I tried, I didn't quite get into the pep. So the third time I decided I need a bit more force. So I got a bone bruise on the bone of my hand. No knife damage? But the knife went through the skin? Yes. Like straight through the skin. Yes.

Like straight through. I had my toast first, though. I had my avocado on toast first. Yeah, well, you don't know how long you're going to be waiting. You get hungry at A&E. Yeah, that's true. So you better eat. So quick Google.

In 2020, 626 Kiwis lodged an avocado-related claim for injuries. Very dangerous. Wow. Yeah. Very dangerous. Laceration, puncture, or sting? Sting. Worth it, though.

Worth it. Did you have good taste? It's a superfood, isn't it? Yeah. The A&E doctor was really cute, too, so. Oh, yeah. Win-win. Oh, win-win.

Did you get the number? Did you get the number? Sadly not. But, you know, I'll have those memories forever. Hot doctors. Forever there. Kenzie, thanks for your call. Keep your texts coming in. Play ZM.

Let's go to Nelly. Play ZM. We want to know now when you didn't know your own strength. Jack has called. Jack, when did you not know your own strength? It wasn't me, but it was my mate. We were at the gym and he was on a leg press. Yeah.

And he was holding his phone in his hand. And he was obviously working out quite hard. And he, like, just crushed his phone. So his strength was the legs didn't crush the phone. He was holding his hand. He was straining so hard he just crushed his phone in his hand. Yeah, the screen just like shattered. That is insane.

Like it was a smartphone, like an iPhone or something. Yeah. I thought when you caught up and said my friend was on the leg press, the story was going to be like he didn't know his own strength, bro. He pushed 100. And I was like, this is really what we're doing. He pushed all the weights in the gym. People gathered for miles.

Jack, thanks for your call. Damien, when did you not know your own strength? I was posted to Egypt with the army and we were going through the Egypt-Israel border and I was trying to wake up one of the border guards. So I was knocking on the glass,

and he opened his eyes and looked at me, and then he went back to sleep. I knocked on the glass a bit harder, and I... Oh, my God! What happened there? That was the boom. That was the boom of death.

He just left us. That was the boom of death. He just left. Boom. I think the phone cut out all the phone lines, just boom. We simply must get him back, because did the guy wake up?

I'm imagining he broke the window with his hard knock. I've never heard the bong of death before. It's the bong of death. Yeah, it happens every now and then. The phone system will just, if somebody cuts off, it'll just be called bong. I think this is my first ever bong. Okay, I believe we've got Damien back.

Damien rejoins the show. You got bonged. You got bonged. The bong of I believe we've got Damien back. Damien rejoins the show. You got boomed. You got boomed. The boom of death there, sorry, Damien. So you knock, the border guard goes back to sleep.

He closes his eyes, so I'm sorry, I'll knock a bit harder and let you know my fist went through the glass. Oh, no, no, no, no. Yeah, appreciate it.

At a border crossing, what could go wrong? Yeah, so next thing you know, I've got six machine guns on me. They're telling me to lie on my stomach. And they had to get the army liaison officer out to talk me out of trouble. To be fair... Sorry, carry on.

The worst part was my mate waiting in the truck. He had no idea what had happened. He'd just seen all the police go rushing in there. To be fair, though, the glass sounded flimsy, and the guy was asleep. Yeah, yeah, he was fully just pretending to be asleep. So it was only about three or four mil. I didn't cut myself or anything, but yeah, it made a bit of a ruckus.

Wow. A bit of a ruckus. Slight ruckus. Anytime an army person's putting a semi-automatic weapon at you, yeah, a bit of a ruckus. Thanks, you're cool. Damien, a couple of texts to finish. At the gym I was trying out,

it was a group exercise class. A ball was chucked out and a group was split into two teams. The girl got the ball and I went to rip it out of her hands and she didn't let go until I pulled the ball and then she let go

and I threw her right across the room. The game got stopped and I got told to calm down but I thought the idea was we had to get the ball and then she let go and I threw her right across the room. The game got stopped and I got told to calm down. But I said, I thought the idea was we had to get the ball off each other. Oh, so she was kind of holding it as resistance. Yeah, yeah. No, no, no. She was like trying to get this ball off each other.

Oh. And this guy obviously just leans back a little bit, maybe takes her off his feet and then just starts wildly shaking it. Yeah. Brilliant. I completely ripped the back out of my

work colleague's pants and I gave him a wedgie. You shouldn't be wedging people at work. He hid the work vehicle keys. And so when I wedged him, safe to say

he'll never be hiding the work vehicle keys again. Yeah. Sounds like lads, lads, lads. Yeah, lads, lads, lads. Right. Cut him in half. Absolutely cut him in half.

I came home from Canada and gave my mum a big hug when I returned and I popped two of her ribs out because I was hugging her too hard. Mums do get a bit frail, don't they? Yeah, they do. We had a chicken that was egg bound. This is where the egg gets stuck in the cloaca on the way out. If you catch it early enough, you can't get it out.

If you leave it too long, they'll prolapse. And I picked the chicken up and I was holding it and then all of a sudden it stopped. I heard a click and it stopped moving and I'd accidentally broken its neck.

My own strength of just holding the chicken still. Oh no. I'd imagine the technique was holding the chicken and then it was running down the arm so you'd have the other arm

here to work the egg out and just held it a little too tight and RIP. Life's fragile, guys. Quick though. It's fragile. ZDM's Fletchvorn and Hayley.

An embarrassing day for you yesterday, Hayley. You're broadcasting from an Airbnb. You've got another two weeks there. Another two weeks of filming The Great Kiwi Bake Off. And, look, when you're on the set of a baking show, you're not often in control of what you're eating. And with the amount of sort of sleep deprivation and guts stuff going on, I needed to be a little bit more cautious with what I was eating. But instead, yesterday, I honed a whole

bunch of baking and thought it would be fine. And then I went to the lolly table, had a whole bunch of that. Then I had a nut bar, just sort of trying to reverse it and add something good, but that was slathered in honey. So do you get to try all the food that they make? Yeah, you can if you want. Because it's all left over. Like the judges will try it. It's in the backstage kitchen and you'll just like walk past

and try to ignore it, but you know. How can you when it's all the best food? It's calling you, isn't it? Yeah. It calls my name. And then so after... Amy, I'm a delicious upside down cake. Okay. Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom. The pineapple

started on the bottom and now it's on the top. I'm sorry, you said that you've got pineapple in you. I'm not eating you. Yeah, I don't want to eat that cake. Why won't you eat me? I'm just going you. Yeah, I don't want to eat that cake. Why won't you eat me? You sound poisoned. I'm just going to go to waste. Yeah, good.

You've got pineapple in you. I'm an upside-down cake. Why couldn't you be a hot, like, I don't know, Jeffers team Christmas cake? Who are you, my father? He always wanted me to be someone I wasn't. I'm an upside-down cake. Okay, you're not a cake.

Do you know what the death of it was? And I obviously can't say what the challenge was or what the week is or who. My guess is it's baking. Yes. Oh, you bloody hell. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. But what got me was someone did something with some elements of sticky date.

Oh. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. It was a sticky date pudding. It's a sticky date oh it was a sticky date pudding it's a sticky date pudding it wasn't a sticky date pudding but i cannot resist this flavor profile and so i ate so much of it anyway and then i had a little break and we had to go back into filming and i'm wearing quite a fitted dress and uh let's just get the pregnancy rumors going because my stomach blew apart it was so bad like i was on set trying to just let let small i said to pax who was standing next to me like dude

you you have to just excuse me i need to fart a little bit while we're standing here and it has to be quite subtle so he was being good and like sort of stomping his feet around and letting me to sort of just sort of like slow release yeah some gas into the into the air of the kitchen so all the cakes now smell a little bit like farts and then the other thing was we had a little break where pax was doing something and i didn't need to be there and so i was on the couch and i fell asleep and the thing that woke me up from my nap was a rather loud fart in the room. What, you woke yourself up? Yeah. And I was like, what was that?

From a nap? Wow. Yeah. And then one of the judges was also in the little cottage where we hang out. And she came in in that moment and we just decided not to talk about it. We just left that. And I think I got away with it mostly, like the bakers

didn't hear any of the farts. But definitely the sound guy did, because my microphone is like this. The sound guys hear everything. He just kept looking at me like, oh doll. It is wild when you eat something that disagrees with you though

that you do get like a literal swelling. Yeah, I get a swollen stomach. And then so you'll see, it one, I'm holding my hands in front of me like I'm hiding a pregnancy. That's what pregnant people do. I was going to say that'll get the review done. Yeah, I'm holding my hands in front of me while I'm standing there in a wide shot because my stomach was like huge.

And that's why I was trying to let out the farts because that's sort of what helps. So do you know what foods do... It's just anything yum. Oh my god. I love yum food. Oh no, so do I. That's why it was just the price I'll pay. I'm happy to pay.

I'm not going to adjust my diet. It would be ridiculous. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and to pay. You know, I'm not going to adjust my diet. It would be ridiculous. Yum. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, yesterday I got an email from my gym and Hayley, we go to the same gym. We sure do. Carween goes to the same gym as us as well.

And the email was basically that the membership is going up. Yes. Now we anticipated this because one, the cost of everything's going up. Everything, yeah. The cost of my gym membership hasn't changed for ages. And, two, they're doing a whole bunch of, like, incredible renovations at the gym that we prefer to go to.

And we were just like, okay, we're definitely going to email soon saying it's going up. Yeah. Which I don't like. Like, I go pretty much every day and I go to classes, so I get my money's worth. Yeah, and I like to donate my money as well to them. You're currently doing a donation scheme.

Yeah, well, I'm just taking, I'm taking, I think, I want to make it eight weeks off. Right. And just see what that does. I wonder if IRD would make that a charitable donation. Because you're not getting anything out of it. Because you're basically giving them money. Maybe.

Maybe. Yeah. So I said to Hayley and Carlin this morning, I was like, did you guys get this email? Because something interesting in the email was that the membership agreement that you sign is linked to the Consumer Price Index. Right.

And they're like, well, because. What? Like, did you know that? I didn't know that when I signed it. And because that's gone up. Because, no, neither. I'm just like, sign, give me my swipe card. And because that's gone up 6.7%, that's how much the membership's gone up.

Yes. And then I said to Hayley, oh, so this is my new amount. And Hayley's like No mine's cheaper Yeah So my Over the course of a month I pay monthly

As do you Yep Mine's gone up $3.46 So mine's gone up $6.98 But we go to the How much has yours gone up Carwin? I'm the same as Hayley Why am I paying $3 more?

Look. Balls tax. They are sweaty things. It's like the reverse pink tax, maybe. Yeah, right. Okay. Yeah. But it's yours, because you've been a member of that gym for such a long time.

Is yours more? It might be a different contract. They're trying to catch you up such a long time. Is yours more of a contract? They're trying to catch you up. Oh, maybe. Because yours is cheaper. No, but Hayley's is still cheaper per month. Oh. Yeah, I joined in 2016.

No, no, 2014. Okay. Because if guys, if it's the same price, they're just turning into a sausage fest, you know. It's like the club, dude. It's like the club. You're like, they let chicks into the club. Yeah, girls, you can come in. Nah, guys, sorry, you're going to, just turn into a sausage fest, you know. It's like the club, dude. It's like the club. You're like, they let chicks into the club. Yeah, girls need to come in.

Nah, guys, sorry, you're going to have to wait for a little bit. We're just trying to keep the numbers pretty even. And then you get in there and it's just women everywhere. Yeah, I don't think people go to the gym for that. It's not a nightclub. So people don't go to the gym to hook up. Look at me in the eyes and swear to me that people don't go to the gym to hook up. From your own personal experience, from what you've seen,

you saw one man pleasuring another man. You saw one man pleasuring another man. That was a podcast exclusive. That was a podcast exclusive story, Vaughn. If you're missing these sorts of stories, you've got to get the podcast. We talk about things that we can't talk about on the radio, but I'm just saying they were shaking hands and they were saying, sir, it's a pleasure to meet you, sir.

They were, yes, they were. Sir, I very much like the cut of your jib, sir. Or there are children in the car. Two men can greet. Two men can greet. Two men were greeting each other. Two men were greeting each other. I was like, okay, well, I'll just go back over here.

In the traditional ancient Roman fashion. Yes. That's right. And a sauna, which were also the ancient Romans. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. I will say maybe there is a gendered thing because you have the spa still in the pool,

whereas in the gym. Oh, do you think so? Whereas we've lost ours to the car park. The ladies don't have a spa. No. We lost ours to the car park. The men still have a spa. Yeah.

Exclusively men's spa. Yeah. Oh, good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir.

Do they greet each other? Good day, sir. Good day, sir. Good day, sir. I don't know. Good day, sir. A pleasure to meet you, sir. Guys, someone just texted saying you guys are making school car trips really weird. I don't know why your children can't meet each other and say good day, sir.

Let's do some business, sir. What a pleasure, sir. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Ah. 22nd of July, 1966. 39-year-old RAF engineer, Walter Taffy Holden, is doing some maintenance on a British XM-135 jet. Yeah.

This is like a RAF, Royal Air Force jet. Is he in overalls? It's a fighter jet. Is he in overalls? He's in overalls. He's damn full to get that oil and such on his clothes. Yeah. He's got coveralls or overalls or whatever you want to call them on.

He's in there. He is doing some maintenance. He's sitting in the cockpit when he accidentally engages the afterburner. Okay. Wow, that seems problematic. The afterburner, if you're wondering, is where you will have seen it in jet movies. Big in the 80s and 90s jet movies.

Yeah, like Top Gun. Top Gun we had recently and it popped off, so I'm expecting to see a whole lot more jet movies again in the future. Yeah, it's a big flamey thing that comes out the back, right? So it's flying and then it needs to pick up the pace. It goes, engage afterburners. Now this aircraft

with afterburner engaged capable of Mach 2. Now Mach 2 is twice the speed of sound. Did you say Mach 2? Mach. Mach 2? Oh, good call.

I didn't know. M-A-C-H, right? Mach 2. Mach. Mach, Mach, Mach. What did I say? Mach 2. You kind of said it

like a Kiwi called Mark. Mark. So it hit Mark. It hit two Marks. It say? Mark 2. Kind of said it like a Kiwi called Mark. Mark. So it hit Mark. It hit two Marks. It can hit Mark 2, which is 2,500 kilometres an hour. Oh, wow. That's fast. Yeah.

That's very, very fast. Why don't Air New Zealand put that on some of their planes? Get to Queenstown quicker. Oh, wouldn't you? It'd be lovely. You'd really go. We'd hear. You'd need a few of them.

So it ran down. It engaged. Yeah. Something was wrong with it, which is why he was working on it, and the computer was, or whatever it had on board at that stage, was unable to disengage the afterburner. Which he'd accidentally put on. Correct.

Right. He's on the ground, he's engaged the afterburner, and off it goes down the runway. Luckily, it was pointing straight down the runway. Imagine if it had been sideways and had just gone through a fence and into a building, it totally would have exploded. So off down the runway. Imagine if it had been sideways and it had just gone through a fence and into a building. It totally would have exploded. So off down the runway he goes. Narrowly missing a fuel tanker, which was crossing the runway at the time.

Wow. And a DeVarhalyard Comet, which was the world's first commercial jet airliner. Oh, yeah. So it's a big dog. Yeah. He narrowly misses that. And then he's like, well, am I going to plow into what's at the end of this or am I going to take controls? He takes off without

a helmet or the canopy on. So he's in a convertible Wait, he's a mechanic, not a pilot at all. The only flying experiences he has is a training single engine Cessna that he went through as part of being an RAF engineer. Right. Other than that, he has not flown any

planes. Right. So up he goes he has not flown any planes. Right. So up he goes. No helmet, no canopy. At the speed of bloody light, he's... Yeah. By the way, when these planes land, ejection seats disengaged. It hadn't been re-engaged before he took off. Uh-oh.

And the landing gear locked down. Because that was my plan, is get up and then eject a seat. So that's out the window. It's. Uh-oh. And the landing gear locked down. Because that was my plan is get up and then eject a seat. So that's out the window. That's a no-no. He can't go anywhere. So he circles for a couple of times, comes back, tries to land, and they're like, if that angle, if you hit the ground, you're going to die.

And he's like, ah, and pulls up, goes back around, comes back again, and they're like, angle's not right. You are going to die. And ah! Aborts two landings. On his third time, he said, what if I drop it tail heavy? So those that, you know, the planes that land on aircraft carriers, you see they've got that massive hook on the bottom,

and they catch that thing, and it's like a bungee cord, and just stops them really quick. They said, well, that landing technique, at least you won't go nose first and roly-poly and explode. He lands it and just stops him really quick. They said, well, that landing technique, at least you won't go nose first and roly-poly and explode. He lands it, stops it, gets out, and everyone's just like, how did you not die? Then his job was to get back after it. I'm imagining a cup of tea because he's British.

His nerves would be absolutely frayed. Cup of tea and a nice shortbread biscuit in the RAF but then he was told to get back out and do the engineering on it seeing as though he was the one

that took off on it and fix it yeah that is insane that story it's insane that should be a movie well it'd be

it'd be a pretty short movie yeah it would be well and then the main excitement part you'd fill it up with a love story oh he could be in love would be. Well, and then the main excitement part. You'd fill it up with a love story. Oh, he could be in love.

He could be in love. And then, yeah. And then there's love on the earpiece. Yeah. And she's like, don't do it. Come back. You've got to come back to me, Walter. Yeah. And he's like, call me Taffy.

And then he lands it on his third attempt. But yeah, today's fact of the day is an engineer sitting in a jet fighter once accidentally engaged afterburners and somehow survived the entire ordeal only to be told to fix the plane and get it back out there for service. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Last night for dinner We had pork chops When was the last time you had pork chops?

A lot Like never Did you ever grow up? Maybe when I was a kid Yeah but did your mum like slow cook them or do something crazy And they were always like really dry Yeah they were really dry Yeah they don't need to be like that it turns out

How great is it growing up and finding out food that you hated as a child Was just because you have your mother's incompetence I did not say that I would never dare say that Even my mother says that After a hard day at work Oh my god I'm just kidding but I'm just saying it doesn't need to be boiled to death I dare say that. Even my mother says that. After a hard day at work. Oh, my God.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. I'm just kidding. But I'm just saying it doesn't need to be boiled to death. And there are other options to cooking vegetables. Who knew? Not everything needs to be boiled. Who knew? Look, it's changed since the 80s and 90s.

She did a great job. She did a bloody great job. Look at me. God, Christine is going to give you a hiding list on your home. He didn't go without. No. Look at this guts. He didn't go without. Look at me. Christine is going to give you a hiding list on your home. He didn't go without. No. Look at this guts. He didn't go without.

Look at this high cholesterol. He didn't go without. Probably actually her fault. He's full of dry chops. He didn't go without. Well, they take so long to digest, the body really gets a chance to draw any nutrients left in them out of it before you pass it as a rabbit pellet sort of poo situation.

We had pork chops last night. They were pretty good. But I'm not here to talk about the pork chops. I'm here to talk about another aspect of dinner. Carrots. Oh, yeah. Because my daughter, Indy, who is 11 years old, 11 and nearly a half of another year, said, now, do we have a carrot tree?

Wow. Was that confronting? Were you like wow this is our carrot? This is how we got talking about it. I said to Sade if you want a persimmon you better go get one because the tuis are cleaning out the persimmon tree. Which I don't like non-native birds. Your thrushes, your blackbirds, your yakbirds,

your sparrows, your robins. Yeah. Pigeons. Pigeons. Pigeons aren't into the fruit, but like I would forgive a keteroo. I would forgive a fantail. I would forgive a tui. I would forgive any native bird, a little silvery waxeye if he was into the persimmons.

Help yourself. How do you mind? It's your land. But not the other birds. But I said to Shadow, if you want a persimmon, you better get out there and get that persimmon tree. Get a persimmon off that tree Because they're getting through them And then Andy said

What do persimmons taste like I said they're hard to describe Yuck They're just pointless Like we could easily go without persimmons They're stupid I love a persimmon They're just dumb

I love a persimmon Orange Like kind of like an apple But kind of like carrot-y But not really Get rid of it And then she said Do we have a carrot tree

And I said What And she said, do we have a carrot tree? And I said, what? And she said, carrot tree. I was like, tell me how you think carrots grow. And she said, like bananas in a bunch on a tree. I mean, I guess it makes sense. And I was like, oh my God. And August, our younger daughter was like, what?

Because she's been in the garden with me. She's easy to convince, let's go out and have a fiddle around the garden, dig up some potatoes and dig up some carrots and stuff. And Andy's like, huh? And I was like, you think they grow like bananas? And she's like, yeah, they dangle from a tree. I was like, have they never had to like prepare

vegetables for dinner? Like we would have to like clean the carrots of the dirt. But then when you buy carrots nowadays, they don't have dirt on them. If I was bringing them in from the garden, I would wash them before I put them inside. Right. It really made me think, hey, less screen time. That is every parent when their children Say something embarrassingly Yeah Dumb

You're like Hey Less screen time Yeah Or if you are Going to screen time Maybe it's YouTube videos About gardening

I was thinking I'm going to get on This TikTok account That she uses To watch her TikToks I'm going to just be like Gardening gardening gardening Oh get the algorithm

I'm going to absolutely Screw the algorithm So it's less of these Stupid Roblox videos With the voiceover voice And more about How fruit and veg is growing. Did you know carrots come from the ground? Yeah, exactly.

Here's a farmer pulling carrots. Oh, my God. Carrots for everyone. I should make an apology for my old man brain. My wife's just messaged saying you've got the children confused. It was August that thought they grew on trees in a bunch. Oh, my God. You confused your kids.

I know. And you're not even like. And really sold one out. Yeah, you're like. As being a real dumb-dumb. Wow. I wanted you. But Indy said something dumb as well that got me.

There was a lot of dumb being thrown around the dining table last night. That is like your mum calling you Philip. Oh, dude. I do this now. But you're not even... Run through dogs, everything. Wow. Because you're in the moment. It started. And it's always when your

mum needed you in a hurry or wanted to tell you off. So the brain just fires all these... And you just start screaming and usually you start with who you tell off first. Mine will be like, Ralph! I mean... Indy! Wow. Totally, you just start doing it. But apparently I got my children wrong. first. Mine will be like, Ralph! I mean Indy! I tell you it's totally you just start doing it.

But apparently I got my children wrong. She might be wrong though. Sounds like you're the one losing the plot. We're all losing our minds. Oh. Yeah, that was my tum-tums. That was my tum-tum-tums. Hey guys, I reckon that was the most fun I've ever had on a show.

Ah, not for me. Vaughan? Um, nowhere even close. No, nowhere even close. Nowhere even close. You haven't been here long, have you? No, I haven't. No.

Well, if you were listening and you had fun, why don't you give us a little review and a rating?