ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 27th May 2024

Episode Date: May 27, 2024

- Silly Little Poll: Going solo to concerts- Green flags women look for- Fletchs Aussie language confusion- Schoolyard sidehustles- Fact of the day day day day daaaaaaaaySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Thank you Bryn. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

It's two minutes past six. Let's have a look. 33 mil. Yeah, nobody won lotto at the weekend. We've still got the deal. We've got the deal. We give each other 2 mil if we win. Is it now going up to 3? No, we can't just keep raising it.

Okay, right. God, simmer down. Now, Vaughan, you're going to deal with the fact that nobody won lotto in the top six soon. Yeah, the top six signs you didn't win lotto at the weekend. Are you just checking your tickets? Nah. I literally just got online my tickets. Well, don't even

bother. You didn't win. I mean, you might have won a free line or something. It's not open. You can't log into the app until 6.30. You can't gamble this early in the morning. I can't gamble this early. Unbelievable. Oh, you can't log in at all because I'm having trouble logging in. 6.30. But yeah, the top six signs you didn't win lotto at the morning. I can't gamble this early. Unbelievable. Oh, you can't log in at all because I'm having trouble logging in. But then that's just that.

But yeah, the top six times you didn't want Lotto at the weekend. I mean, apart from the fact that it went up again. Apart from the fact that we're just here. Just the personal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The personal little touches. I'd like to think I'd still come back into work. I wouldn't ditch immediately.

I wouldn't do that to you guys. I wouldn't ditch immediately only because I wouldn't want people to know I'd won. I'd give it a month or so. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you'd ditch on a week where someone won a medal. Yeah, and you'd be like, I'm out. I'm out. Maybe he won the medal.

I was going to say I'd start quiet quitting, but I've kind of been doing that for five years. How much less can we give? Yeah. Five? Ten? Ten? Ten?

Ten? That's enough. That's enough. Ten? Ten? Ten. That's enough. That's enough. Ten. Next on the show. Some celebrity criminals in our midst. Oh, wow. There's been a couple of celebrity arrests over the weekend.

Play it. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. I personally have never been arrested. And I would just like to put that on the record. I've never been arrested. You're not the unknown nameless. Female broadcaster. Yeah, no, it's not you.

Nah, even though I did get a ride with Vaughn this morning, I just want everyone to know it's because I left my car in town last night. When you do get, like, done for drink driving, is it a rest? Like, you know if you get pulled over at a roadside stop and you're over the limit and they're like, okay, leave your car there and come in here and you need to get the bloods and whatever

because the breath's the indicator, right? And the blood's the test that they'd take you to court for. Or maybe if you're not... You go to court. Is it arrest? You're under arrest. Unless you're not cooperating, maybe.

It all just seems quite voluntary, doesn't it? Yeah, it is. And then they just give you a court date and then you just turn up. And then you get charged with drink driving. That's a good habit, you know? Having driven a friend to the court date and then you just turn up. And then you get charged with drink driving. That's a good habit. Having driven a friend to the court date before.

I don't think you're under arrest. You just get charged. Yeah. Are those two separate things? Yeah. Anyway, I haven't been arrested. Lawyers are up early this morning

and you can let us know on 9696. Well, there have been... Oh, yeah, and you say that's not because you've been pulled over for drink driving either. I'm just saying.

Yes. It seemed like the time to ask the question. Oh, it's good. Thank you for bringing that to the group. There have been two celebrity arrests.

This is why I'm talking about this over the weekend. What a quad! What a quad! Oh, my God. This has been a hot minute. So, Sean Kingston and his mother are arrested on fraud and theft charges. And he was arrested, was I reading right after his concert?

Like, he literally was backstage and you can see all the... SWAT team. Yeah. Like, a full SWAT team raid. That's a bit much. Quite a lot, eh? What did they get arrested for? Fraud. Fraud and theft charges. Oh, so they...

So, um... I need to play the actual banger though, don't I? Short kickstick! Your way to beautiful girl. Yeah, that's right. So, hang on. I'm trying to figure out what it was for. Arrest warrants issued for Kingston and Turner, his mum,

on May 20th detailed an alleged scheme starting in October last year to defraud several businesses, including a jeweler and car dealership, of a variety of goods valued at $100,000 or more. Grand theft of property valued around $86,000. Grand theft of a car from a dealership, a luxury car that was $86,000, grand theft of a car from a dealership, a luxury car that was $160,000, and jewelry worth half a million dollars.

These are all American dollars, by the way. Was he like saying he'd promote them online? I have no idea. So then he was like, hey, we're all good on Instagram. Me and my mum are fine. We didn't do anything wrong, but straight up, you've been arrested. And then Nicki Minaj has been detained for...

Alleged drugs. Alleged drugs. Alleged drugs. Alleged drugs. Right. Whereabouts was she arrested for alleged drugs and what were the drugs? I don't, I'm not sure of the specific drugs.

I will say I'm on TMZ for this. Amsterdam. She was in Amsterdam. She was in Amsterdam. She was in Amsterdam. So we're assuming a bad one then, a naughty one, a drug. I don't know. Because you were allowed.

So apparently they, she just got a fine. And was released. Released from custody with just a 350 euro fine. Right. So she, what, she had weed on her or something? But this is still alleged because they were like, they're not naming, but it's obviously her. Guys, we've heard from a police officer.

Have we? On 9696. Our text machine. Police officer here. You just get detained when you get caught drink driving and given a court date for later, not technically arrested. You just get detained when you get caught drink driving and given a court date for later, not technically arrested. But could you go and get like a cheeseburger while you're waiting? Once you're out, you get yourself a cheeseburger.

Right, okay. You do what you've got to do. What if I'm going to spend that long in the police station? Get Uber Eats to deliver your cheeseburger to the police station. Yeah, delivery address. You guys want to know that? Monaco Police Station. And you could go out and get it

because you're detained but not arrested? Just be like, I'm just popping out to the street. I'm not doing anything. I'm just getting a burger. Right. They said arrested for possessing soft drugs like marijuana, for example, which in Amsterdam, they still have laws in Amsterdam.

You can't just be like that, like toking up, getting ablaze on the street. Yeah, and they've cracked down on it because of all the British tourists and all the tourists that were coming to Amsterdam, so they've kind of cracked down a little bit on that stuff. I don't know. I've never been to Amsterdam. It's a beautiful city. I'm sure been to Amsterdam. It's a beautiful city.

I'm sure it is. It is a really beautiful city. Yeah. Canals. Bikes. Bikes. Remember when we nearly lost Sean Kingston to a jet ski accident? That's right.

Well, maybe this will, you know, shake him up a bit and he'll release some new jams. And you know, what is a jet ski if not a watercour? It is a watercour. Next, somebody has worked out the average monthly mortgages on famous TV houses. Oh, my God. Did you see the Home Alone houses for sale again? How much for?

Have you seen? Five point something. No. Like, close to $10 million. $10 million. It is ginormous, and it's all been, like, completely renovated. It's amazing. Well, next.

Which is good, because you don't want those booby traps going off. No, no, or that horrible little fireplace downstairs. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn, and Hayley. Now, somebody has worked out the average monthly mortgagery payments on some famous TV houses. Hit me. Okay, some of these you may need to win lotto on Wednesday. That's fine. To even get a foot in the door.

Okay, I'll win lotto then. Start really expensive. The Fresh Prince of Balear. Oh, yeah, big house. Now, obviously, a lot of these were just used for external shots. And the inside was studio. Exactly, shot in the studio. But the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air mansion in L.A. is worth $10.2 million.

Big mansion. Is this who lives there currently? Is this someone famous? I'm just having a look at the house. I don't know. People have done tours of the mansion. Apparently, you can rent it or you have been able to rent it. Yeah, if you look at it now, they've got it up on Airbnb

and there's a 90-seat bedroom with like Air Jordans and graffiti and... How much is that a night? That would be so... Because it's a $10 million mansion. Surely a night would be like tens of thousands of dollars. It's ugly as. The monthly mortgagery payments on the Fresh Prince of Bali mansion, $67,000 US.

These prices are in US. The full house house, external shots only. But that house is worth $5.5 million. Wow. Four bedrooms, four bathrooms. The monthly mortgagory payments for the full house house, $36,000 a month. Jeez Louise. A month.

For a trip advisor. A townhouse that you share walls with somebody else. It's crammed. That looks like a house in Newtown or Mount Eden or something, you know? The Everybody Loves Raymond house. Yes. Oh. That is worth $1.1 million.

Okay. Okay. Now we're getting down to something recognisable. $7,500 a month for the mortgagery payments there for the Everybody Loves Raymond house. Whereabouts was that set? This house is in New York. So maybe upstate New York. Right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. All in the Family. What's that show? Do we like that? That's an old show. It's an old show, okay. Who cares?

So another house from Everybody Loves Raymond, the Ray and Deb's house. Oh, yeah? $760,000. Oh, wait, so what was the first everyone loves Raymond house? The mum and dad's house over the road because he lived over the road from his... Frank and Marie's house. Yeah.

So... So it's set in Long Island. I've just looked it up. Right. Yeah. So this, their house on Everybody Loves Raymond is $760,000. Wow. With monthly payments of $5,100 a month.

Okay. Breaking Bad. Wait, who's won? Albuquerque, New Mexico. This is Walter White's house, which you can drive past on tours. And people throw picks. My parents went past it when they were in Albuquerque

and went on a bus tour. And they had no idea what it was. Like low ceiling kind of Cali vibe. How much do you reckon that house would be? Not a hell of a lot.

It's not a lot. $350,000. Yeah, yeah. Just under $2,000 a month. I wonder how much Jesse's house is worth You know that awful place Where he was there

With the drug den The drug den With the parties Roseanne's house Oh yeah Is that Chicago? Was that where Roseanne was sent? Yeah

It was here at Illinois It's $230,000 Shameless The house on the US Shameless That's a trash house That's South Chicago This is the cheapest house on the list.

The last one, $123,000. $700 a month. $700 a month, yeah. It was. I mean, that was the whole deal. Shameless is an amazing show, but it's set in like a lower socioeconomic area with a family just trying to get by.

Yeah, yeah, totally. But that house looks, yeah, in that area, it looks nice. It's a leafy suburb. I've never watched the show. I've started watching the British one. Yeah, the British one was the original one. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I never watched it either. Well,

there you go. Well, there you go. If you want to buy a little famous house, I'd love to know the New Zealand ones, because the outrageous fortune one's gone. That's townhouses now. I've got a photo from years ago. There aren't really many famous... Nah.

Who would it be? That. Literally just that. Just that, and it's gone. And it's gone. Should have made that into a monument, hey? Like a little... A little museum to New Zealand television would have been nice.

Nah. You do have to go all the way to West Auckland, though. Oh, everybody, when we moved to West Auckland, everyone that came and visited us, I'd be like, you want to see the outrageous fortune house? They'd be like, where? Oh, my God. Right there.

Oh, my God. The top six is next. Yeah, the top six signs are you didn't win Lotto at the weekend. I mean, apart from the fact that Lotto was not won at the weekend. Yeah, and apart from the fact you're still up. Here we are. And probably on your way to work right now. We're all going to do it.

Play. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the Top Six. Hi. Despite my best efforts, Lotto was not won at the weekend. Yeah.

I put in a good effort as well. Did you see there was a second division winner sold at our local Super 8? Not your local Super 8. The QMU. That's not where I got mine from. 21,000 I think is what second division was. Everybody had their slice.

That's nice. It'd be so frustrating you're a couple of numbers off. The closest anyone got to $30 million at the weekend That's nice. That would be nice. That's nice, but it would be so frustrating you're a couple of numbers off 30 million. The closest anyone got to 33 million or 30 million at the weekend. It's now 33. Well, I hate it when it gets this big. I know.

It just feels like it occupies your brain. Because then you're like, I'm going to change the world with that. Well, I'm with the top six signs you didn't win a lot at the weekend. I'm not changing the world if I won. Sorry, when I say the world, I mean my world. Yeah. Our world. Specifically my world.

Our world. I'll change your world as well. Okay. Fantastic. Number six on the list of the top six signs you didn't win a lot at the weekend. You're awake at 6.26. Yeah. Go back to bed.

Millennials who won their millions don't get up at 6.26. They don't get up. They don't grind and hustle. They have a sleep in. Yeah. Number five on the list of the top six signs you didn't win a lot of the weekend. You're wondering how much gas is in your car. Yeah. This is not a problem for the mega rich.

Yeah. Is it going to last? Is it going to last until payday on Friday? Drive very economically. Number four on the list of the top six signs you didn't win a lotto at the weekend. You're feeling the cold. If you'd won a lotto, you wouldn't feel shit. No, you wouldn't.

You'd be warm. Merino socks and the like. Alpaca cardigan. Yeah. Insulation. Yeah. In the house. Number three on the list of the top six signs you didn't want to lotto at the weekend.

You're wondering what's in the cupboard for breakfast. This is not a problem for the rich. No. What's in the cupboard? Just brunch all the time. Do you reckon if you won lotto, you'd get real fat? Because you'd be able to... No, I'd suck it out.

I'd pay to suck it out. Yeah. Or I'd pay someone to take care of this. Yeah. Yeah, okay. You cook and someone tell me what to do. Yes, you cook. You train me. Yeah. someone tell me what to do. Yes, you cook, you train me. Yeah.

Just tell me what to do. I look great. And then worst comes to worst, pay to suck it out. Yeah. Number two on the list of the top six signs you didn't win a lot of the weekend. You know how many days it is till payday? Five. Yeah.

Five. If you won a lot, I don't think you'd worry. No. How many days till payday? Every day, payday. Yeah. And number one on the list of the top six signs you don't think you'd worry. No. Every day payday. Yeah. And number one on the list of the top six signs you didn't win Lotto at the weekend. Are you still listening to the top six?

What are you doing? Yeah, go back to bed again. If you won, you'd be like, this top six isn't for me. Yeah. And you would immediately turn off the radio. And be like, I can't listen to that. It might make me poor again now that I'm so insanely rich. Yeah.

That is today's top secret. We talked about a movie that we just kind of accidentally stumbled across the trailer of, Billy and Molly and Otter Love Story. And then at the weekend, my dad was up, and last time he was up up we watched Ghostbusters yeah oh my god he just doesn't watch movies

was it the original? I think so or would it have been Ghostbusters 2 oh god not that awful female one oh god she said it

I tried to be a feminist through that steaming pile of garbage she said it not me not us so we were kind of like What are we going to watch

Was kind of Become a tradition When he's up We'll watch something Because he never Watches movies Did he stay the night Yeah

Why does he never Watch movies What do they do at night Do they just watch Whatever is on They watch TV They're big TV watchers Right

They'll record a Mum or my sky An entire series of Oh they met They did mean to pass on They loved your cameo On my life is murder Oh thank you Mum and dad Oh thank you entire series of, oh, they did mean to pass on, they loved your cameo in My Life is Murder. Oh, thank you. Mum and Dad

love a Lucy Lawless production. Which I believe was born out of COVID, right? Because we were the only place in the world that was still producing TV, and I think... Yeah, I don't know. If I did, I popped up in one of the episodes. Of My Life is Murder.

That's a series I've got on. What did you play in this? I played a social media influencer who, like, stops Lucy on her, she's, like, walking and she's going far, she's, like, in a hurry. And I stop her to ask if she could take a photo of me. Okay. Right. That's good.

Just make it just, like, touching a toe back in the acting world, you know, to keep that degree useful. Yeah. Tax deductible. Oh, the whole lot. Yeah, yeah. Make sure the gym membership still remains tax deductible because I had to look a certain way for that five minutes.

Yeah. Bingo. Sure. So that's the sort of stuff they watch, that My Sky series. They love that one you watched about the lady who was the first responder in the final season and the first responder in the final season and the body was in the quarry at the start. I don't give it away.

No, no. It was at the start. It was in the first five minutes of the episode I accidentally watched. Happy Valley. Happy Valley. Oh, my God. That's a brilliant TV show. Now we know that the body's in the quarry, though.

Yeah. Well, that's the first episode of season five. Season five. And so we watched. I said, I've got to I want to watch this And it was a hard sell To the family The girls are like

Nah it sounds boring Oh no I mean the title Doesn't exactly Billy and Molly On a love story Yeah Anyway we sat down

To watch it And by the end of it It won Everybody was won over Really Okay Yeah it's the story Of a couple

He's from the Shetland Islands, the famous home of the pony. Okay. North of Scotland. Scorchlet, yeah. And he's from there, and they get to a certain stage of life. They've never had kids, and he feels the call to his home soil, so moves back there. Right.

With his wife, they build a house, and what a beautiful picturesque bay. Until it's winter, and then it looks bloody miserable and cold. Very cold. Very. But yeah, he is basically, he never gets diagnosed, but he's basically depressed. Right. And one day down on the jetty an otter turns up

and it's all like skinny and stuff. So he starts feeding it and then his whole life becomes about providing for this otter. We watched, because yeah, we were looking at this, and we watched the trailer, and I had tears in my eyes. The trailer. And it's beautifully shot. I mean, it's Nat Geo.

Charlie Hamilton James is the director, and he's a National Geographic magazine photographer. He's worked on all the big, like, wildlife series and stuff. Yeah. And I just Googled this morning. I was like, well, that all makes perfect sense. Is it sad? Like, is it?

It's not. I will promise you, because that's what everyone in my family said. I'm not watching if the otter dies. If the otter dies? I cannot. The otter doesn't die. Okay. The otter doesn't die.

And he doesn't die. Does he? Does she die? No. Oh, yeah. Yeah. The wife. He finds the friend.

Yeah. If the wife goes. And then he has to feed the friend. If the wife goes, I can't. And then he has to feed the wife to the otter because it's so hungry. Yeah. It's tough to get food up there in the ship. He can't afford a funeral. No, there's no death. That was what I was waiting for the entire time.

And I was like, this is going to ruin. Everyone here is going to blame me. I'm going to ruin movie night. But it's called a love story. It's a love story. It's just about like an old mate like finding a bit of direction and a bit of purpose again. Is this like the octopus movie? No.

But the guy's not as weird. That guy's kooky. Yeah. The otter guy's not kooky. He's just, otters, oh my god, it made me just be like, cute, let's muggle some of them. But then it was like, no more, no, we can't. Do we have otters here? No. In zoos we do. Yes. Yeah, in the zoos. Remember Jin the otter? Yep. Jin the otter escaped from Auckland Zoo.

And went to Rangitoto. Naughty Jin. Naughty Jin. Jin was a real cutie patootie. Oh, this trailer is still breaking my heart. Beautiful to watch. And, like, Dad was just blown away because, like, how'd they do that? Like, there's drone shots of the otter swimming.

He's like, how'd they do that? I was like, shots of the otter swimming. He's like, how'd they do that? I was like, it'd be a drone shot. And he's like, you can't hear the drone though. I was like, no, they'll be adding

the splashing sound effects later. Who doesn't it? I was like, it's somebody's job. It's called a Foley artist. What did they just splash the water and record it and then put it,

yeah. And he was like, amazing. Mind blowing. It's so worth a watch. Is it five out of five? It's so worth a watch. It's watch. Is it five out of five? It's so worth a watch. It's different.

Is it seven out of seven? Why did we go from five out of five to seven? I'm saying is it 8.5 out of 8.5 stars? I'd give it a close. You'd give it an eight out of 8.5? It's just a wholesome, nice watch. It's exactly what I needed. And Disney Plus?

Disney Plus, yeah. The Nat Geo thing. That is literally my afternoon. That and a big nap. And I'm tired. I've had three hours sleep. You know the big man would love it. I will weep.

You're going to cry. The big man will love it. I will. Opening credits, I'll be like, oh, The Order. The Order, they're friends. Yeah. Also, if you've lied to us and The Order dies, you're in big trouble. I promise you.

I'll kill you. I'll kill you and you'll die. No, no, no, no, I promise. Play ZM's Fletchford and Hayley. Fletchford and Hayley, silly little pole, silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole.

Do you enjoy going to gigs alone as today's silly little pole? Silly Little Paul. Silly Little Paul. Silly Little Paul. Do you enjoy going to gigs alone? It's today's Silly Little Paul. I sat alone at Hayley's comedy show. How did that happen? Well, there was like a group purchase of tickets, and then somebody didn't think they could make it and then could, so bought their own tickets. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And so then when everybody wanted to sit together, I was like, I'll sit alone. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so then when everybody wanted to sit together, I was like, I'll sit alone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To be honest, I had enough. You took one for the team. Hmm, it was a gift. Yeah. It was a gift. Gorge. I've been to movies. I've been to concerts by myself. Movies rule by yourself. Yeah. Movies are the best to go by yourself.

Yeah. You can stay till the end, right after the credits, and no one's like, come on Vaughn, let's go. That's normally Hayley and I at you, yelling at you that. Yeah, if we ever go to a movie preview, like a preview, if we were going to get an interview, I'm always just like, guys, we don't know if there's any credits.

And Hayley and I are in the car waiting. Literally like, me, me, me. Come on. Yeah. I like going to like lots of things alone, but I don't think I'd go to concerts alone. I've been to a concert alone. Yeah. I'd go if I really wanted to go and no one else wanted to go.

Yeah, and, you know, I don't mind it because when I have, it's been overseas. I don't know anyone anyway. Yeah, you're not like, yeah. And then you don't have anyone, like, in your ear talking. If it's, like, one of your favourite bands, you just take it in. It's so good. I can see that.

I can see it. I mean, you don't get, like, sloshed and dance alone. Yeah, I was like, are you dancing or are you having a vibe? But, no, you're just enjoying the music, I guess. Well, 86% of people said no, they do not enjoy going to gigs alone. 14% though said yes. Yes, they do. Dan, there's no stress worrying about whether your friends are enjoying the gig,

especially when it's a niche artist that they're not super familiar with. Plus, it's so much fun making friends at a gig. Don't even get me started on people that go to concerts that aren't into the band. I know. I do not want to be at a concert with someone that's half into or hardly into a band. Then they're talking to you. Yes, and you're like, no, this is the song. Shut up.

Who's spending that much money to go to a gig and not know in the... You've got to be a big fan. Some people do sometimes. Yeah. Save your money. Yeah. Lucille says, I can do a sitting...

Lucille 2? Lucille Bluth, yeah. Yeah, right. Lucille 2. Lucille 2. She's just having to have a sit down because of her vertigo. I can do a sitting show alone, but not a standing one. Oh, like a theatre.

She's sitting because of the vertigo. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a theatre show. Yeah, she could go to a theatre or a movie or even a seated gig maybe, but not a standing one. Maybe she gets lost in the crowd. Ashley said, other people just want to talk through it,

and I'm there for the music, so going alone is a great option. Okay. CN says, I mean, I'd prefer to go with others, but if your mates don't like the band or singer, then at least you know all the people there do. Yeah. True. True that.

You kind of got a shared interest, don't you? Yeah. Courtney says, no, I want someone to boogie with. Okay. Yeah. She won't boogie alone. Courtney says, no, I want someone to boogie with. Okay. Yeah. She won't boogie alone. Jazz, it's not preferred, but I've been to a few alone.

I went to the Spice Girls in Manchester a few years back. See, that's something. You're not turning down the Spice Girls, are you? Yeah, if you can't find someone to go with, you're like, fine. Screw you.

I think everyone needs to do it at least once in their life. It means you've clocked being a badass bitch. Yeah. Catherine, it's not as fun alone, but I'd never want to miss out on going to a great concert just because I didn't have somebody to go with, so I would. Yeah.

Vicky, I love going to gigs solo. No one to slow you down when you're trying to get up the front. I normally end up making friends with people on the line anyway. Yeah. She's a friend. That's cute. Another Courtney, safety first. It's good I don't want to go to something like that all by myself.

Fair enough. Yeah, that's true. Fair enough. You're going to have a plan at a The skill don't want to go to something like that all by myself. Fair enough. Yeah, that's true. Fair enough. You've got to have a plan at a concert, don't you? It's a little pole. Yesterday, I was coming back from Australia. Yeah, you were over in Australia. In Australia.

I was coming back and I was at the airport and I had heaps of time. So I was like, you know what? I'm going to get a lot of life admin done. Oh, lovely. What'd you do? What'd you do? Well, I'm trying to find like a cheaper pet insurance plan. Yeah.

Hot. So I was like, I'm going to do all that. I'm going to book the dentist. Yeah, hot. I did that. I did work. I did prep for the show. Saw that.

But I had a whole lot of things so i uh i needed to write stuff down i didn't have a pen with me so i went up to this guy uh and i was like hey do you have it can i borrow a pen by any chance well who was this guy he was just working at the like the um desk oh okay yeah right yeah because i was just like some random no and i was like he's gonna have like so right, yeah. Because it was just some random person. No, and I was like, he's going to have like so many pens. Yeah. And so he was like, oh, absolutely. And he turns around and opens up like a big cupboard of stationery. And I was like,

I love stationery cupboards. Oh, yeah. Like, you know, the stationery cupboard here at work is so good. Yeah. Is it? And you know where we get our mail. Yeah. You're talking about the stationary pantry. That's entry-level bullshit. That's not really.

That's entry-level bullshit for little babies. And then where we get our mail in those big, slidey racks. Yeah, there's so much. There's another couple of these big notepads and stuff. Oh, my God. Because when we worked at TVNZ, man, they had a stationary cupboard. I used to just, like, stock up. That's taxpayer stationary.

You're actually entitled to a bit of that. Hell yeah. We should all as taxpayers just be allowed to walk in off the street and grab a couple of pens. Grab a notepad and some highlighters. Because we paid for that. Because we're taxpayers. Oh yeah, it's yours. But yeah, the pantry's great as well. But anyway, this guy's like fumbling around in there and like... How hard is it

to find a pen? How hard is it? And he's like picking up these like tiny boxes and I'm like, pens are longer than that, dude. Like, what are you doing? Is he going to give you like a little mini pen? He was a little bit older, so I was like, well, maybe he just he's looking for the pens. Maybe it's his first day.

I don't know. And then he turns around and he says, do you need it for the phone? And I'm like, oh, yeah, like I'm imagining like, yeah, I'll write stuff down when I'm on the phone. Yes, okay, sure. I need it for the phone. And then like he's rummaging around and that's when I'm like, oh,

for the phone. He's looking for a pin. Not a pin. And like. Because you're in Australia. And he's looking for a pin. And I'm like, oh, no, I'm looking for a pen. And I did the Australian accent. And he's like, oh for a pen. And I'm like, oh, no, I'm looking for a pen. And I did the Australian accent.

And he's like, oh, a pen. And I'm like, yeah, not a pen. A pen. I'm looking for a pen, not a pen. Pen. Pun. He's like, I'm sorry, I thought you were looking for a pun to get your sim card. A sim card. A sim card out of your phone.

I said, no, I need a pen. You're lucky you didn't get your cast iron pen. Yeah, actually. Pen, pen, pen, pun. No, that's a pen. That's a pun. That's a pun. I need a pan. You're lucky you didn't get your cast iron pan. Yeah, actually. No, that's a pan. That's a pan. Put the pin in the pan and write on it with a pan.

That's how they say pan. Oh my god. That's so confusing. It's not that far removed, is it? We're so close to each other. It'd be different if you were in America and you asked for a pen and they went and got you a pen. Because they always think we're twerking.

They have no idea. In Australia, they're neighbours. They're neighbours. They should know. But then that's like classic like sex. Did he get you a pen in the end by night? He did get me a pen. And a pen.

It was a rad pan. He's like, I hope you don't mind it's rad. I'm like, it's okay. Who asked that? Any pan red he's like i hope you don't mind it's red i'm like it's okay any pen it's gonna be black i said i said any pen will do how embarrassing to borrow a pen and it's a red pen it's a red pad that is so embarrassing yeah i was like look i just need a pen any pen oh my god, like, of course. Like, I... Because I've always thought of, you know, you always know, like, six or deck.

Yeah, I always... Big deck. Like, I... Yeah, the six, I always say six. Six. Because otherwise they rip you in Australia for getting that wrong. It's just weird how it sounds like to them when we say six, we're saying sex.

Yeah. But it also sounds to us like when they're saying six, they're saying sex. Yeah, sex. How does that work both ways? I know. And, you know, you never say, I'll have a couple of beers on the deck.

Yeah. Show us your big deck. Show us your big deck. Show us your new big deck. Have you seen that clip of there's a businessman, there's an Australian businessman being interviewed on an American podcast and they say like, what is your

advice to people who want to succeed? And he says, spend less time with dickheads. Yeah. And the guy's like, what? My advice is, spend less time with dickheads. And he's like, oh my god, I've never met a man who would encourage people to spend less time with theheads. And he's like, oh my God, I've never met a man who would encourage people

to spend less time with the kids. Dickheads. The kids. And he's like, what? Less time with the kids? No, with dickheads. It's such a funny confusion. He just thinks,

he just has no idea. What is your advice to succeed in business? Spend less time with the kids. They do take up a lot of time. They do actually. They don't have a lot of business it's probably quite good advice

yeah I'm glad you got a pen and a pin I could understand it in America but Australia come on pen

play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Ailey play ZM I've just actually you know you were just talking about

your pen just to yeah you asked for a pen in Australia and they were looking for a pen. We were in Fiji and some Aussies asked what my daughter's name was. I told them Madison.

They looked really confused. I told them again and they said, is that a common name in New Zealand? They thought I was saying medicine. Medicine. Oh, Madison. Madison. Yeah. It's my daughter, Madison.

Well, we're just such a huge fan of cough medicine. Yeah, we just love. In fact, our son's here, so I'm like, cough. Yeah. Cough. Robotussin. Robotussin. Cute.

Now, there is an article that I would like to share. It's a thread on Reddit that all women are kind of chiming in on. The green flags we look for when we're visiting a fella's house for the first time. Now, I've talked about this before. When I went to Aaron's house, 100%, he knew he was going to get laid that night because the bed was made to perfection, the lamps were on,

there was two bottles of red wine on the mantel and that house was so clean. Wait, he had this already? He? And then you went home back with him. Yeah, I went to his house. Right, okay, yeah. And I walked into the room and was like, oh, wow,

didn't someone think that this was going to happen tonight? And he, to this day, 13 years later, is like, no, that's just how I used to live. And I was like, what happened? Was it, though? No. 100% that room was ready for hanky and panky. Not, I would never assume a lady such as herself would both hanky and panky.

We hankied and we pankied. Wow. I thought you would have just pankied. You've got to save your panky for the marriage. No. You give them a little hanky. I gave them it all. On the wedding night, you give them the panky.

No, we hankied and we pankied. Who's going to hanky the cow when you get the panky for free? I wouldn't have called Hayley a cow, but okay. Oh, wow. Okay, so on this thread, here are the things that women are looking for when they visit a fella's house for the first time. And I'll tell you what, it's not March. Bathroom, clean, with a bin.

It needs a bin. Yes. Do you want me to put my tampon in your toilet and clog your drain? I don't. Or to, harrowing as it sounds, wrap it up in a toilet paper little bomb and pop it in your handbag.

Do you know, I thought until very recently tampons were flushable. No, no, no. I know that. Because I got the new septic system and I was reading the thing and it said no sanitary. And I was like, I said to Shada, I was like, I got bad news, no more sanitary flushing.

She's like, I've never flushed. Are you insane? I was like, there's no bin in our bathroom. What? You had to have a bin. And I was like, where does it go? She's like, mystery. Like, let's just keep some mystery in the marriage.

Yeah. I was like, oh, no. What, like wrap it up in toilet paper and then put it in the bin? Yeah. I'm imagining that must have been the situation. We've been together 20 years and I've never seen nothing or nobody. I know. We just deal with it.

You should hire one of those wavy bins that goes Oh my god, yeah. And then the woman always comes to the end of it. Yeah, yeah. I've got to tell you, it's so mortifying when you're using one of those and it's a quiet bathroom. You're like, oh my god. Okay, everybody knows. Okay.

Okay, so we want a bin in the bathroom. The girlies agree with that. We've got to have a bin. More than one towel also in the bathroom. If there was just one towel, like one skanky towel hanging there. I always have one towel in the bathroom. If you were having a guest, though. Yeah, no doubt, have a towel. Yeah, I wonder if that's like that they provide you with a towel.

If they live alone, you live alone. These are green flags. These are green flags. So we want to have like more than one towel in the bathroom. Food in the fridge. Now I've never gone home with someone and checked out their fridge. No. You checked

out my fridge. Yeah. And it's a wild fridge. Well there's nothing in it. There's nothing in it but eggs, kimchi, condiments and bottled water. Yeah. We want, yeah, hand soap. Because, man, the amount of men's houses I've been to and there's no soap.

And that just tells you, you're not washing your hands. Why don't people use soap? Always have the soap. And the worst part is you touch yourself to go to the toilet. Yeah. And then there's just no soap. Bin with a lid. That's mentioned so many times. Oh And then there's just no soap. Bin with a lid. That's mentioned so many times.

Oh, see, I don't have a bin with a lid. Should I have a bin with a lid? Well, you're just one day someone's going to flush their tampon. You just have to put up with that. Just deal with it. Bin with a lid. Yeah. Okay.

I'm going to hire one of those. If you had one of those sanitary stations that are so wide? Then you give your kid your apartment and a fob for your apartment to the lady that works for the company that cleans it out. Yeah. Wild. And then there's just like you're just at home one day and you just hear a click and you're like, hello.

And she's like, just here for the bin. Like it would be so wild to have a private residence for that with someone servicing the bin. Like, it'd be so wild to have a private residence with someone servicing the bin. More green flags. Homes that don't look like an Airbnb. Like, they have character. Okay.

Like, that there's an element of who you are. Yeah. Because I know, I've definitely visited homes where it's like, the decor is a bed. Yeah.

And a dresser. But wouldn't you rather if it didn't have character but it was tidy? No. Really? Yeah. Okay. You're just like, no, you're just so uninspiring. Just having like a dresser.

Yeah. And just your Nivea. Okay, what about Legos? What about some Star Wars Lego? Anything. Anything that tells me anything about you. Okay. Do you know what?

I love this one. Someone said stocked spice rack. Okay. Now, if you're getting there for the hanky and or panky. Yeah, you want to know your eggs the next morning aren't going to be plain. Yeah. You know, you want some chilli flakes. Dazzle me with paprika.

No, I do chilli flakes in my scrambies. Do you do chili every time? Every time, yeah. Yeah, poached eggs go hard with a chili flake on top. See, I'll chili oil. I poached the perfect, did I show you, did I send you the video? Yeah. Yeah.

Did I poach the perfect egg? Has it taken you this long in your life? No, no, no, but like, I'm talking next level. Here we go, watch this. Watch this guy. Oh, yeah, that's it. Watch this guy. Watch that guy.

Watch that guy. That's good. Who's that girl? La, la, la, la, la, la, la. Those are some set whites. Did you use... But some like runny yolk. You used vinegar, right?

Yeah. That's the trick. You use a splash of white vinegar and it stops the egg yolk. I don't know, a lot of chefs say you don't need to do that. You don't need to do it. And then I got the. That's the trick. You use a splash of white vinegar and it stops the egg yolk. I don't know, a lot of chefs say you don't need to do that. You don't need to do it. And then I got the tornado going in the pot.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's a beauty. Not a full boil like a simmer and then drop all three in at once. Oh, wow, okay. They just find their own way. And they wind themselves on and then. Good, good from you. And then just kind of sit with a chopstick.

Yeah. Kind of like not poking them but like nudging them sit there with a chopstick. Yeah. Kind of like not poking them, but like nudging them from the side with the stick. Yeah. Until I was like that now. And then I screwed them all out at once, trying to. Tony's a chef.

He's a chef. Send it to the boys. And then everyone was having poached eggs. We're all sending each other our poached eggs. So if you think you're like lads in a chat with this mate talking dirty about women, sometimes, sometimes, sometimes we're just trying to have a poach off.

We're having a poach off in here. We're having a poach off. Just innocent cute boys having a poach off. Would that be a green flag? That sounds dodgy. Would it be a green flag if a guy could poach the perfect egg the next morning? If I woke up at a fella's house

and he brought me that egg. Fresh coffee and a perfectly poached egg. More hanky and panky. And I would give him both a pank house and he brought me that egg. Fresh coffee and a perfectly poached egg. More hanky and panky. I will give him both a panky and an in hanky. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. While the time has come, Shannon has been asked an important question from a friend. Shannon, what were you asked?

I have been asked to be a bridesmaid for the first time. Oh my God, she's so excited. I'm an adult. It's happening. It's really fun. Yeah, itmaid for the first time. Oh my god, she's so excited. I'm an adult. It's happening. It's really fun. Yeah, it got dropped in the same sentence. My friend's like, I'm engaged, will you be a bridesmaid? It was all at once. Oh, it's literally one of the first things you think about. Yeah.

Are you top dog? Bridesmaid? Maid of honour? I don't know who is, so no. I haven't been asked to be maid of honour. Sounds like there's going to be four of us, three confirmed. Shouldn't tell me about the other person. You want to be the last one because then you still get to do the bridesmaid stuff but you're not relied on for the heavy lifting.

No, you do like one job. Yeah, well, I'm the furthest away. The wedding's going to be in Invercargill, so I feel like I get a... Oh, yeah, no, hands off, bridesmaid. Oh, gorgeous. I'm going to be the fun part. Autopilot.

I love that you're excited. I've been a bridesmaid. Oh, gorgeous. Autopilot. I love that you're excited. I've been a bridesmaid five times. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, it sucks so bad. List of jobs that it sucks to have at a wedding. Number one's got to be MC. Is it? No, because bridesmaid.

No, maid of honour. It gets heavy a week before, but like maid of honour from the get-go. Maid of honour best man. Even aftergo. Maid of Honour best man. Even after the wedding. Yeah. Did you have to do much for Vaughan's wedding, Fletch? A little bit, eh, but not too much. Yeah, not much.

Not much. I've been to Maid of Honour twice, and then the others have just, you know, part of the ranks. It's so much work. Maid of Honour. When you end up spending, I hate to say it, so much money. Well, your flights to Invercargill from Auckland, like $8 million. Then you've got to chip in for the dress.

You can catch a ride with the main front. Yeah. You've got to hitch with a truck, like a week out. That's a good idea. That's a great idea. Just hang around. Will you approve my annual leave for a bit of extra time? 100%.

Absolutely. We've got that power. And you turn on Fine Friends too, just in case. Yeah. Yeah, just hang out at Servo's, ask those truckies for a lift. You'll get down there in a minute. And no blonde girl like you, you'll be down in bloody Invercargill if we're not.

It's definitely an honour. Like, it's nice to be part of someone's big day in an important way. And I'm not trying to belittle them. God. Yeah, they're dramatic. Pardon? I was asking if she knew. No, no, belittle them. God. Yeah, they're dramatic. Pardon? I was asking if she knew they're dramatic. No, no, not at all.

Oh, okay, good. She's nice and chill. Blink once if they are dramatic, but you're too scared to say it on the radio. No, I think I'm the dramatic one. You're dramatic. So I think I'm bringing the alcohol and the drama. I think that's my addition to the group

because the others seem like real low-key, nice people. I think I'll be the bridezilla by proxy. Yeah, right. Yeah. Have you been maid of honour for anybody that was dramatic? Any other times you've done bridesmaiding, has it been for someone who's dramatic? My best friend

was totally fine. That was totally fine. My other friend that I was a maid of honour with, she just had, like, it was a great wedding, but the only thing she'd forgotten was an MC. So I was the maid of honour. And then just before about to walk down the aisle, I said,

oh, wait, who's MCing? And she was like, oh, you? And I was like, my day just turned. So I was like, okay, before I go down the aisle with you, let me go talk to the kitchen staff because now I'm working. But no, I haven't had any nightmare brides. The first time I was a bridesmaid, she had the biggest dress ever and I had to help her go to the toilet.

That was sort of the main thing. And she had to straddle it front on. She had to look at the tank. That was the only way she had to look at the tank. We had to hold up all the dress and she had to straddle it like a horse. Number ones or twos? Ones. Ones only.

I don't know how she would have pooped in that dress. I do have a question, though. What am I meant to do? Am I meant to do something right? Do I send her a present? Or be like, yeah, I'm just sitting here now. I'm like, well, what am I meant to do? Do you know when the wedding is?

No. No, you'll be all right. You'll be all right for a while. It should be in a year or so. It's not soon. So I'm like, I can budget. I'll get my main freight ticket sorted. Or you could sort of drift apart.

You don't get a ticket on the main freight truck. No, you can on the agent. So if you give me the money, I'll sort out your main freight ticket. Okay, cool. We don't guarantee anything. Do you know what you need to do is you need to start the conversation about the dresses you're going to wear. Yes.

Because don't let them just put you in anything. Well, I did ask. I was like, what colours are you thinking? She said, not red. And I said, I wouldn to wear. Yes. Because don't let them just put you in anything. Well, I did ask. I was like, what colours are you thinking? She said, not red. And I said, I wouldn't wear red anyway because that means you've slept with the groom. Does that? I don't think that's a thing.

No, that's the rule. Yeah, you can't wear white to a wedding and you can't wear red. What if you have slept with the groom? Just asking. Then out and proud in red. Wow. Play.

ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Just doing a bit about, because when, do you know off the top of your head when tertiary education started costing money in New Zealand? Because it used to be free. The education part of it

used to be free. Obviously the accommodation and stuff was never free. Right. No, I don't. 1990. Oh. That's just after I was, while we were born. Right. Why don't? 1990. Oh, crazy, eh? That's just after I was,

while we're born. Yeah. In 1990, the government introduced a standard tuition fee for tertiary study. The fee was set at $1,250. Oh.

For the equivalent full-time year, full-time year of study with postgraduate research students paying only 40% of that. So a degree might only cost you like five grand or less. It takes three and a bit years.

Wow. Mine was $48,000 and that was a three-year degree and I got all the extras, like the cost-related costs, which I bought the cutest like dresses and whatnot with. And I got the student loan living allowance thing because I wasn't eligible for the free one. People forget back in the day

like when I had a student loan it was 7% interest. When you finish studying it was 7% interest and then I paid off my student loan and then two weeks later Helen Clark said they're interest free now guys and I was like my student loan. And then two weeks later, Helen Clark said, they're interest-free now, guys.

And I was like, you bitch. Can I have a refund? Yeah. Auntie Helen. Auntie Helen. Oh, God. And now it's only interest if you're overseas, right? Yeah.

Yeah. Which is fair enough. So this is the stat that blew my mind reading this article. At present, government data has shown there are 21,710 student loan borrowers aged 65 and over. Far out. So there are people retiring still with a student loan. They'll be the ones that, like, did a massive degree. You know, like like did law or something

like retrained in their 40s or 50s yeah the ongoing yeah totally it's retraining because if you take it back 34 years to 1990 and now they're over 65 they must have been at least 30 by then so it would have been going back for a bit of

teacher training or must have been more expensive to still having not paid it off by the time you hit 65. So 16,600 of those are in New Zealand. So, you know, about 5,000 Kiwis in retirement, people over 65 overseas as well. So they're paying interest and not getting super? Yeah, you wouldn't be.

And I'd love to know if they're taking your interest, your student loan repayments, because there's minimal out of your super? Yeah, you wouldn't be. And I'd love to know if they're taking your interest, your student loan repayments, because there's minimal, out of your super? Because that becomes your sort of primary source of income. I mean, you can work when you're over 65, so maybe not, but maybe you're just getting it taken out of your wages or whatever. But they're over 65 and they've still got a student loan.

Paying mine off was such a happy day. You just have to chip away at it. Were you doing minimum or were you doing a bit more than minimum? I was doing like nothing until they started telling me I had to. See, this same article from Radio New Zealand said that many people have been shocked sometime to discover their superannuation was being docked to repay a student loan. Robin paid it to pay Paul, I believe that's... But you just hang it, if you're over 65, you're just hanging out for that like clause in your

student loan that when you die, it gets written off. Yeah, I know. Like you are, right? Why would you make extra repayments if you're retired? Yeah. Like, you're just not going to, are you? I wouldn't think so. I'll tell you what, if you're over 65 and you get a student loan, why not pop back to university for a bit more stuff? Clock it up. Yeah, yeah. Because that's during... I'll tell you what, if you're over 65 and you've got a student loan, why not pop back to university for a bit more stuff?

And clock it up. Yeah, yeah. Because that's what they said during COVID times, eh? When money was tight. They were like, don't pay your student loan. They're stupid.

But just pay the minimum you have to because it just sits there with no interest. It's interest free. Do banks even take that into account when you're getting a mortgage? Yes. They do.

Because when we got our first mortgage ever, we had to, when you say all your debt, we had to add our student loans, money and arrows. Right. It's not as bad as having that amount of money on a credit card, for example. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Or with a finance company, for example.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I want to know, no one's going to be able to do the maths on when you're due to pay for your student loan, but if you've got a whopping student loan and you're getting it, because there was a woman in her 40s who was having to go back to retrain to be a teacher, and she's like, I haven't even paid off the last one.

Now I'm going back to learn how to teach the thing I previously studied. Yeah, or what about the people that just like fluff around? They're like, I'm going to do this. Oh, my God. I don't like it. I'm going to change. People that get so close to finishing a degree and they're like, I'm going to do art history. And you're like, what are you doing? Just finish it.'t like it. I'm going to change. People that get so close to finishing a degree and they're like I'm going to do art history. And you're like, what are you

doing? Just finish it. Just finish it. None of it matters. It's not really going to help you that much. Or they do like two thirds of a degree and then do a whole nother degree. So you've done five years now but you still have zero degrees. I have friends that literally

did like seven years and then like ended up with just one like BA. But if you're looking for big student loans, it might not even be people that are doing multiple things. Just studying like law or like flying. Like student loans for pilots are massive. Ugh. So you want to hear from people that have the giant student loans.

They just may never pay off the student loan. So you want to hear from people that had the giant student loans? They just may never pay off the student loan. They've never, as I used to, have never seen it as a real debt. It's not, though. Somebody just messaged, you know, I work in tertiary, and over COVID and lockdown and all that, lots of people were retraining. And it would come in and it would show that they were last in the system 20-something-odd years ago.

Wow, okay. Yeah. And they hadn't yet paid off that debt, and they were like, oh, we better learn something new. Okay, well, give us a call. 0800-DIAL-ZM. You can text through 9696. How big is your student loan, and how did it get so big?

Like, what did you study? Did you do multiple degrees? There's some interesting messages coming in, actually. Okay, keep them coming. I'm from England, reads this message. Okay. I graduated in 2014 with the way the loan works out, with the exchange rate and the cost of living in this country accounted for.

I pay back three pound a month. Six bucks. Six bucks a month. And it doesn't even account for the interest. After 25 years of leaving the country, the UK write off your loan. Ten years down, 14 to freedom. Oh, my God. Keep your calls coming through 0800-DARLS-AT-M-9696.

Let us know about your whopping student loan. We're talking student loans. How big are they? No, no, no. Are you reading the top text from the vet that studied in the US? No. Yes. I'm a vet and I studied in the United States of America.

It's four years postgraduate and those are the only years I needed to take loans. Yes. No. I'm a vet and I studied in the United States of America. It's four years postgraduate and those are the only years I needed to take loans. Yep. By the end, I had borrowed 400,000 United States dollars. Yeah. With 7% interest that starts as soon as you take the loan. Because John Oliver did an episode on Last Week Tonight. He always does a deep dive into something. And yeah, the American student loan thing is wild.

It's been privatised. So your student loans are like through loan companies. Oh, not like a study loan. No, not like a government. Horrible. It's not a loan against the government, right? It's a loan against the private equity. Hold on. We have a couple, a vet and a pilot. Horrible. It's not a loan against the government, right? It's a loan against the private. Hold on. We have a couple,

a vet and a pilot. Don't marry. Oh my God, no. Don't marry. My husband is a pilot with masters and a PhD. Who needs a doctorate in flying?

That's insanity. It must be in something else. You just push go. You push go. I thought the planes flew themselves. Is there a doctor on board? He's like,

you're not going to believe this. It's me. It's literally me. I'm a vet. I got out with $70,000. Husband is a pilot with a master's and PhD, $150,000. So that's $220,000. That's a quarter of a million dollars, basically.

You've got to marry an investment banker when you've got a student loan that big. Or a dum-dum that didn't get a loan. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, and as a tradie with no student loan, hearing all this makes me so glad I went with the trades.

In the late 90s, there was an active effort to discourage people our age going into the trades. There really was. We said this on the weekend. Yeah. Like, in my school,

I mean, I went to an all-girls school and it was still a very male-dominated industry, but it was like, dumb people go and do the trades. Yeah. And now the tradies are like... They've got boats.

Ha, ha, ha. They've got fishing on the weekend. I've got a boat. BMW. Yeah, exactly. And how I wish, having renovated a house, that, you know, Aaron worked in the trades, I worked in the trades.

Yeah. Go the tradies. Go the trades. Yeah. I managed to get a $120,000 student loan and a $40,000 personal loan from doing a pilot qualification. The pilots.

And only 20 months now back at school to become an air traffic controller. Money well spent. Money well spent. The English, remember we talked about the girl who's just like abandoning England to never go back. Yeah. So currently my loan is £29,000 and steadily rising with interest because the minimum I'm paying is £ pound a month,

as we heard. There's absolutely no way that's keeping up with it. $83,000. My daughter's got an $83,000 student loan. She studied law. Vet here, once I finished my loan, I was at $125,000. My wife did med school as a postgrad and her student loan got to over $160,000.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. There's another vet and pilot couple. What? The second one. I studied vet and my partner aviation. Together our loans are over $350,000. Tell you what, though.

If there's a remote animal that needs seeing to, I know the couple. Boy, do we have The couple figure Play ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley Play ZM Fletch Vaughn And

New Zealand Comedy Festival Fred nominated Hayley Sproul It is It is Congratulations Thank you

If you don't know What the Fred is It's like the best show award It's named after Fred Dagg Yeah Yeah There's the Billy T For like

It's not newcomer But like people That have done Less than three shows Yeah That's sort of Your rising stars I know

Do you know what's funny Is because I did my show And I really enjoyed it But definitely It was a very good show Behind the scenes You were like In the lead up

Panicky You were like It's not ready And then Flesh saw Your second night In Wellington Yep Or third Third night Third night It was a very good show. Behind the scenes, you were like in the lead-up, panicky. You were like, it's not ready. And then Fletch saw your second night in Wellington? Third night, third night. He was there Thursday, Friday, and Fletch was the message man. He's like, I don't know what she was worried about.

I know. But you always do this, like when you do a Hayley's version or something. Oh, that's crap. I don't like it. It was rubbish. And everyone's like, oh, my God, it was so great. And you're like. But I know sometimes I've got a bad gauge on my stuff.

But like last year, I was like, I think I've made a really good show. And I really enjoy doing it. Literally, like on opening night in Wellington, Aaron was like, how'd your show go? I was like, oh, it's a good show. It's not a great show. It's terrible. And then it got nominated for Best Show, which was ridiculous. I didn't win, by the way.

That was last night. Yeah. But like amazing to be nominated. It's ridiculous. I didn't win, by the way. That was last night. Yeah. But, like, amazing to be nominated. It was ridiculous. I thought people were just going to catch me out and be like, she's not a comedian. She's a fraud. Well, is this what imposter syndrome is? It is indeed.

You've truly joined the ranks of the show now, which is often nominated. Yeah. Often nominated. Oh, you know what? We've done even more of than nominated. What? Submitted.

Yes, yes. Yeah, it was what we've done even more of than nominated? What? Submitted. Yes, yes. Yeah, it was good. I did the showcase yesterday. So the winner was Barney, Duncan and Trigby Wakenshaw and they do a show called Different Party and it was like magical. And as part of the awards last night, you had to do five minutes of your show.

And it's like, because it's for best show, they've already probably made up their mind, but a little bit that'll maybe get you across the line. And they went first. Alice Sneddon was the other nominee, and she was in the UK, so she couldn't do a set. And these guys went out, and I was just like, wow, sucks to be the person following them.

Like, they were just magical. So I was like, oh, well, I'll just go and have fun. Well, I saw your show on Friday and it was amazing. And you sat on your own? I sat on my own, yeah. I sat on my own, which was nice. I was sitting next to perfect strangers and they were all very heartily

laughing. Well, I, my audience was predominantly female, like very much so female. And thank you to everyone who came. So many Fletchmore and Hayley listeners have come up to me and say that they listened in the morning and now here they are in the evening. Appreciate it. And that they would also message you on Instagram

and you delete all your messages. So many people calling me out for that. Hi, it's me. Laura, I messaged you on Instagram, but you've deleted it, haven't you? Yes. But my friend Shari came on Saturday night and was like, I would define, and she says this with respect, I would define your audience, I would call them 90% office bitches.

Office bitches. She was like, and she loved it. It's like the girlies after work who have come and had a few drinks and then are sitting there like smacking each other. I'm talking about pornographic content. Yes, yes. And then we're all watching this. We're all watching this.

And then last night I celebrated and I've been asleep for three and a half hours. Yeah. But I'm here. Yeah. And I'm happy. You're physically here. I'm physically here. Yeah.

And I had one hell of a festival. But now I shall return to being more of a contributing member of society. I don't know how, I guess it's because you do famously delete your inbox without reading them on. But I'm fielding a lot of questions on where else the show will be headed. It's only been to Auckland and Wellington. Well, I don't know if I'm like, I'll just say it because it doesn't matter. I felt terrible in the middle of my show. I say like, is anyone here from out of town? And so many people came from out of town.

Mostly Christchurch. And I was like, what are you doing here? And they said, we've come up to see you. And I said, oh boy, oh boy, I'm bringing the show down to Christchurch. Now that's happening in August. Yeah, August. And when do tickets go on sale? No, that's July.

July. Okay. August. And when do tickets go on sale? No, that's July. July. July. This is a soft launch, by the way, because I haven't actually done this. 19th and 20th, I'm in Christchurch, and then I'm going to New Plymouth in August, on the 17th. Now, that's all I've booked in for now, but I'll add some. I'll do some South Island stuff.

I just didn't book any in because I genuinely thought the show was shit, and now I'm like, it's obviously not. The songs are. The songs are brilliant. Your songs are brilliant. Incognito mode, one of your songs. Yeah, that's what I did for the friend yesterday.

Flight of the Concord level. Yeah. Guys, I am loving this. Also enjoy it because this is the last I wish to lay compliments at your feet. I will. No, it was amazing. I will take them. Well, yes, I will bring the show around because lots of people are

asking. And now that I know that it's a good show. And you've got a mortgage to pay. Awesome. I think New Zealand's horniest stand-up comedy hour. Yes, it could be. 100%. There was like one night where I mentioned in the show I play some audio clips from like erotic audio books and there was a woman in the front row listening to one voice,

and I heard her go, oh. And I was like, are you all right? Jeepers. Because I'd never heard the audio. And when you were playing it, the lady beside me was talking to her friend. She'd listened to one of them. Yeah. And I said, is that real?

I thought it was like. Like I've got actors to do voices. No, no, no, dude. That's what we're listening to. What I was saying was, yeah. I thought it was like. Oh, like I've got actors to do voices. No, no, no, dude. That's what we're listening to. The one they were saying was. Yeah. I know. Play.

ZM's Fletchford and Hayley. I got an Instagram message Saturday. Saturday night. Saturday. Saturday night. And I sat on it for a bit and then replied the next morning. You didn't just delete them all like Hayley? It's so good.

No, I replied to everybody that messages me because my mum once, I've told you this story, Hayley, I don't know if you, do you remember Tearaway magazine when you were a young teen? Yeah. So Tearaway magazine, stop now, but when you were a teenager, it was released like quarterly. Yeah. Always during the school year, you get Tearaway magazine. It was like a youth magazine. Oh my God, I just remembered Rip It Up as well.

Yeah, Rip It Up, the music magazine. Oh my God. R. rip it up as well yeah rip it up the music magazine r.i.p lost some classics yeah um tearaway magazine would get delivered to schools for free had all sorts of it was a rather it was pretty good but it was also kind of before the internet was when it was really strong so you didn't have like all that at your fingertips and there was a pen pal section and my friend in school allison said she did it and she got quite a few responses and she said to me, you should do this pen pal section just for, like, how funny it is. So I, like, wrote this ad to go in the pen pal section.

Vaughan. Yes, sir. It's still online. Tearaway. Tearaway.co.nz. Oh. You can subscribe. So it's just online now.

Who's working there? People. People are. This is great news. Oh, my God, it's the same logo. Yeah, it's the same logo. Journalist wannabes from around the country, around the motu, would send in articles and stuff and it would get printed.

And it was pretty rad. Oh, that's amazing. It started in 1986. Very cool. Well, this would have been 1996 if anyone's got the – I wonder if they've kept All their I wonder if they've kept

All their printouts Because it was either 95 or 96 That I did this I put in the Pen pal thing And I can't even remember What I wrote

So you see The thing was Because you know There was that Movie at the time Must Love Dogs Yes I think I put

Must Love Chocolate Oh he's a clever boy So Term 4 2014 That was the last edition Ever printed of Tearaway magazine. And now it's just fully online. It was such a good time. And I got over 700 letters. Sorry?

It was insane. It got to the point where the postie, because you just put your address, because it was the 90s, why not? Of course you do. You put your physical postage address. And the postie would, like, bundle them up in rubber bands and put them in my parents' letterbox. And the postie was just like, what's he done? Like, I've never delivered this many letters.

And when the first bundle arrived. And what was in them? Like, hi, Vaughan. Someone sent me, like, it was insane. Someone sent me, like, an envelope full of M&Ms and, like, just these massive things and, likeughan. Someone sent me, like, it was insane. Someone sent me, like, an envelope full of M&Ms and, like, just these massive things and, like, drawings. People didn't know me. No.

They didn't know me for anything. They were like, this guy just, I want to be a muscle of chocolate. What a guy. Wait, so this is why you reply to everybody. If I would say, sir, if I may to the jury, if it pleases your honours It was the tinder of its time And I was hot probably Wow

Any flirty letters? All flirty There was one that was like Very intense Hot So I got like When the first ones arrived

There was like 12 the first day Mum's like You are going to sit down And reply to every one of these people Because they took the time To write to you Yeah And then the next day

When 50 arrived Mum's like You are sitting down this weekend And taking care of this Get it out of. And then the next day when 50 arrived, mum's like, you are sitting down this weekend and taking care of this. Get it out of the way. Then the next day, 50 more arrived and mum's like, who's paying? You are sitting down and just sitting. I don't know who's going to pay for all the posters.

Oh, my God, who's paying for the stamps? Mum and dad. But then it just got too much and mum said I had to write to Tearaway and, like, print, like, a, hey, everybody, thanks so much for replying. I've been overwhelmed by your responses. Oh, my God, you were hot tearaway property. I was hot tearaway property. It was

easily the most popular I've ever found in my entire life. And it's been all downhill since. Yeah, I know. And thank God. It was wild. Oh my God, can you, if anyone here is listening, and in 1995, wrote to a young Vaughan Smith

in Morrinsville. Someone sent me a chunk of their hair. I always remember that one. Yuck. And I think there was a couple of older men writing. Pretending to be like what? Teenage? Yeah, probably.

Pretending to be teenage girls. So my mum was always like, you've got to reply to people. So that's why I went, God, we've got a little bit sidetracked here. But when I get Instagram messages, I reply to everybody. Even if it's just thumbs up, heart, emoji, anything.

Do you see that, Hayley? It's very easy. Okay. Pretty make their day hearing from Fred-nominated comedian, star of stage and screen, and speaker, Hayley Sproul. Yeah. And bread ambassador. And bread ambassador.

Plowman's all day. All day or a day. Yeah. Baby. So I got this message on Saturday, slightly distracted. I sat on it for a while and I replied because they were asking me to chip in for Shana's birthday. $75 they thought was a fair amount.

$75? Who is Shana? Sorry, that's not a chip in. You're covering a full cost. I hate chip ins. I hate chip ins. A chip in is 20 max, by the way. We were talking about it tonight,

and we thought $75 each chipping in for Shaina's birthday would be about appropriate. Let us know. $75? Yeah. How old's Shaina turning? I don't know Shaina. What do you mean you don't know Shaina?

I don't know any Shaina. So I sat on it for a while, and then I replied, nah. We've been brats lately. We've been brats. Whenever we ask each other a favour Ne N-E-E-E-H No I would have just gone N-E-H

Ne Yeah maybe Too many E's I just wrote ne And they sent me a question mark And I said you heard me You are being a brat And they're like

Come on she's been through a lot It's a big birthday. We're happy if you want to put in a little bit less, but it just means everyone else is going to have to put in a little bit more. And I said, you'll be getting nothing out of me. Oh, my God, Vaughn. And then that was when they were like, is this Vaughn Williams? Making up the last name, I can't remember what they said.

I was like, no. And they're like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I'm like, this is why I don't want to contribute to Shayna's birthday party. I don't even know who she is. I don't even know her. Yeah. But now I feel bad. Oh, we should chip in.

You know what? Maybe we chip in 25 bucks each. That adds up to 75 bucks. I don't know Shayna. I don't know Shayna. But it's her birthday. Wait, what's she been through? I don't know.

Because then maybe I put in 20. Maybe I've been in 20. Well, she's been through a lot. I know. Yeah, but you could say that about many people. I think everybody's been through a bit. Yeah. She's been through a lot.

A lot. I know. Is it like she's been through a lot, she did a renovation that blew out, or she's been through a lot, a health scare. You know, they're different. Yeah. And that's going to dictate whether I chip in 10, 15, 20 or 25.

Not 75. 75 would be your upper limit. How many people are in this group? Is Shana getting like a $750 per separate? Yeah, totally. What are you buying? Yeah, that's the other thing. I don't know why. I should have asked what she's been through. I should have said me, Vaughan, before I contribute.

Vaughan Williams. I would like to ask for clarification what she's been through. But then the real Vaughan, before I contribute, Vaughan Williams, I would like to ask for clarification what she's been through. But then the real Vaughan would have known. Yeah, the Vaughan would have known. Now, question. We've got a birthday coming up in our friend group, just saying. Do we? It's real soon, yeah, like June.

What are we chipping in for me? Oh, yeah, Carwin. Carwin's coming up. No, me. What are we chipping in for me? 75 seems like I've been through a lot. We've? I've been through a lot.

Yeah. I have to work with you two. I don't know anyone that's been through less. There are days where Hayley and I are having a mutual stress, often financial, meltdown in the corner and you're like, la-di-da-di-da. Yeah. Di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di-di.

Yeah. Snoop Dogg. Off to my perfectly curated life. I'm going home to nothing. It goes, Shannon, Shannon's birthday is next. Then it's yours, Fletch. So you've actually cut the line here. Then it's Carwin's.

Okay, I'm just saying that, like, quite often we'll contribute for birthdays. We've already figured it out. We're going to find a nice photo of Vaughn and I, probably from having been paying attention, where we've been all gussied out. We'll blow it up real big and put it in that free frame you've got. Spare frame.

Well, you've got a spare frame. But it doesn't seem like. Where do you want to go in the house, Vaughn? Because I'm thinking the end of that hallway, so you open the door and there we are. It's a giant picture of you two. Yeah. Wow, that would be my honour to put that up there.

Sure. It would be our honour to give it to you. I'm not chipping in $75, by the way. Just get it printed. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. It's Beer Week. B-E-A-R. Not B-E-E-R.

Or B-A-R-E. Or Gay Beer Week. Or B-E-H-R. 1980s actor Michael Beer. Yeah, right. No, wasn't it Jason Beer? Jason Beer was on Roswell. Yeah. Michael Bear, I feel like

was on Terminator. Remember we who did we see once when we were walking? We saw the guy from Roswell. Roswell, yeah. The one I saw as a celebrity. The main guy. Yeah, yeah, the main guy off Roswell. Is this in his driveway? The guy that I'm talking about is

Moswell and he died in 2010. Most well known for Pride and Prejudice. Oh, right. Okay. Jason. The one with Thingy McFadden. No, no, no. Before that.

OG. Jason Bear is the one that was on Roswell. And then nothing else? Not a lot. He was a handsome dude. Whatever happened there? Jason Bear here. Well, I don't know.

Do I? Roswell also finished 22 years ago, so there's probably a bunch of people not knowing what we're talking about. Wait, Roswell finished 22 years ago? It ran from 1999 to 2002. In my mind, Roswell ran for 10 years. Yeah, and I was older, but no, I wasn't. It's like you think there's way more episodes of Mr Bean.

13? There's none. There's 13 episodes of Mr Bean. That's all they, you're just like, none. There's none. There's 13 episodes of Mr Bean. That's all they ever made. No, I watched it for years and years. Yeah, the same 13 episodes. Yeah. We could almost name them all now.

The one where he gets his turkey stuck on the head. The turkey on the head. Yeah. The one where the mini gets crushed. The mini. By the team. The girlfriend one. The one where he goes on the date.

The girlfriend, yeah. That's not the turkey on the head one No Yeah Ta-da Ta-da You've seen the TikTok theory That he's an alien

No Because at the start He falls There's a beam of light And then he falls out of the sky And lands on the ground And he's always like Not quite knowing

What to do with himself The movies were so good Maybe I'll watch that today That's actually a great look up But yes Yes They're throwing the fingers At everybody in LA Oh god it's so good It Maybe I'll watch that today. That's actually a great look up, but yes. Yes. They're throwing their fingers at everybody in LA. Oh, God, it's so good.

It's good stuff. It's true, but we're not here to talk about beans or bears. Michael Bear or Jason Bear, we're here to talk about bears as in grizzly bears. Today's fact of the day is that brown bears and grizzly bears are the same bear. They only have different names in different geographic locations. Oh, are they? Yes. So a brown beer, when I think of the grizzly,

I think of that documentary, The Grizzly Man. Narrated by Werner Herzog. Was that in Canada? Is that Canada? It was about the guy who lived with the bear. And then they ate him. They ate the bear, ate the guy. And it scrinkles black and you hear the crunch.

Yes. As you can see, it didn't pass the bear. But so I think of that as grizzly bears, the massive ones that you never, ever want to come across. When I think of a brown bear, I think of them being, like, cute and small. No, no, no. Same bear. No, brown bears are big bears.

So if they live in coastal areas of Alaska, they're called brown bears. Inland bears that have limited or no access to marine-derived food sources such as salmon. Yum. Oh, yeah. And seals and walruses and such are often smaller and they're called grizzly bears. And the hump they've got on their back,

people are like, oh, it's like a bear hump. It's not. It's just their strong muscle for swiping. Lats, bro. Lats all day. Them on lat pull-down machine, you never get on when they're at the gym. Oh my god, and they're taking it up. And they use all the plates. You're just like, oh my god, you

bastards. And then afterwards you've got to un-rack it. Yeah, yeah. And because they're so strong, they've used all the heavy ones. Yeah. So they're rude. They're strong, but they're also quite rude. Really rude. So if they're coastal, they're so strong, they've used all the heavy ones. Yeah. Yeah. Gosh. So they're rude. They're strong, but they're also quite rude. Really rude. So if they're coastal, they're called brown bears.

If they're inland, they're called grizzly bears. And so grizzly bears are typically more aggressive because of a more limited food source and territorial. What are the bears on a coastal city in a pride march? Daddies. Daddy bears. Okay, right And also, grizzly bears aren't called grizzly bears because they're grumpy

or grizzly. It's because their hair is grizzled, like silver-tipped. Oh, frosted tips. Yeah, frosted tips, which is another thing you might see on a daddy at a game. Yeah, the daddies love the frosted tips. In coastal urban Alaska.

Yeah. I'm looking forward to, I mean, I like this. This is a good start. Good launch of beer week. I'm looking forward to some facts about size. Like size, speed. Okay, I'm looking forward to the fact about how they plug up their buttholes with mud. Oh, I know.

Hibernation. Can we finish with that on Friday? No, because it's been, well, you've just let the cat out of the bag or the bear poo out of the plugged butt, if you will, post-hibernation. That's been a fact of the day before. I think it has. And I try not to double down on the facts. Well, I'm sure you can fit it in there.

Well, there's only so many facts in the world. Is that when you know you'll retire, when you've done every fact? When there's no new facts. Wow. There's no new facts. Well, I'm sure you can. Well, there's only so many facts in the world. Fresh facts. Is that when you know you're retired? When you've done every fact? When there's no new facts. Wow. There's no new facts. So today's fact of the day is a grizzly bear and a brown bear are the same bear. They just live in different locations. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. The Mr Bean theory that he's an alien can be disproven

because the choir that sings after he drops to the ground was written in Latin and if you translate it to English, it's a song about Mr Bean being kicked out of heaven. So he's dead. He's a ghost. To you, Texter, I tip my hat. Wow. Play.

ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. There is a girl, I believe she's in high school, and she has shared that she sells sandwiches at school. And not just like egg salad, like fancy ass. She did like a little pose like, come to school with me to sell sandwiches. Wait, they don't have a canteen?

Or a tuck shop? She makes her own chipotle mayo. Ay-oh! Yum! Yep, she like chops up tomatoes, lettuce. Look, she's set alarms for 3.30 in the morning. What? She wakes up and she makes these gourmet sandwiches,

making BLTs, bacon going in the oven at 3.30 in the morning, prep stations, everything. Sells them at school. Sells them at school. To other kids. And makes a bit of, look, she's toasting the bread. She's got a hustle going on, wraps them up in a little wax paper, chipotle mayo on, lettuce.

Oh, my God, this looks like a good Sammy. How much is she charging? Did you have to pre-order the sandwich the day before? Yeah, because, oh, I think so, because she, on them, has names. Like, she wraps them up and writes people's names. So, yeah, I guess you would. She goes around.

And she's hustling, man. She's just making money. Yeah, because if they were just there, not necessarily made specifically for someone, they'd be the anti-tomato crowd. Oh, yeah, who are like, grow up. Can I have all of that? Grow up.

It's a tomato eater. Oh, controversial. She cuts them diagonally. What? Down the... No, no. And it's on a kind of a long loaf, which I would go half for a fancy sandwich.

Right. Because I cut diagonally on a square bread. On a square bread. This isn't a square bread. On a square bread. This isn't a square bread. If it's a long one, I will, as you say, cut completely. Do you know what I mean? That just looks like insanity, the way she's cutting. Oh, no, no, no.

They look yum. That's doable. Good, eh? Is that toasted? Is she toasting? Yeah. She toasted them. There's ham, bacon, turkey, cheese, tomato, pickles if you want them, avocado.

And she hustles, man. How old is she? I don't know. It's high school. Right. So this is why she's gone viral because she is making absolute bang. Yeah, totally. She's side hustling and she's so young and she's at school.

Yeah. Look at this. I'm just showing the boys a little half cross section. You would pay so much money for that at a bakery, like a proper restaurant. Oh, that's like a $12 sandwich. More. More. Oh, if you're going $12 sandwich. More. More. Oh, if you're going to sit down and get... That's like an expensive Reuben.

And then just get a sprinkling of green trash that you're not going to eat as a garnish, you'd easily be paying it. This girl, I mean, she's getting up at 3.30 in the morning. She's paying for the ingredients. Makes $125 a day. In high school, can you imagine? Cash. Yeah.

Tax man's not saying anything. No. Oh, you ain't paying nothing on that. She's got a hustle. Yeah, you should probably be careful advertising your side hustle on social media and going viral worldwide and not paying tax. Yeah, yeah, look. Because then someone would dub you in. I don't know that I'd be publicising it

or getting a New Zealand radio station to talk about it and maybe we'll make it go viral and we'll ruin her life. But, you know, my friend did this, Maria. She Maria, what is it you can't face? What is it you can't face, Maria? Don't call me that. My friend Maria

when she was going on like an overseas trip or something and she said, I need to fundraise. So she used my mum's brownie recipe, which is by the way, if you've ever wanted a brownie recipe, Patsy Sproul. Boy, oh boy, she got it. Is it just the Edmonds one that Patsy's claiming is hers? No, no, no, no. And then my friend Marie actually ended up becoming a baker and, like, using my mum's recipe in, like, cafes and stuff.

Where did your mum get it from? She must have inherited it from somewhere. It's a secret. Her mother? You can ask for it if you want it, but I'm not. It's from a woman's weekly in the 80s. Like everything is. Yeah.

And my friend Marie would do this. She would make brownies. She was a really good baker and have like ice cream containers full of them and we'd go around at lunchtime being like, does anyone want a brownie? She sold them for $2 a square. How much was a square?

Like, just like that. But who was it, mum and dad paying for the ingredients? Oh yeah, she just used her family kitchen. Yeah. But she made like quite a bit of money because she did it like every, like twice a week maybe. I love that. I know. But she made like quite a bit of money because she did it like every, like twice a week maybe.

I love that. I know. See, like for every, like one of those stories back in the day is like, you know, the 80s or the 90s. Yeah. Or the 2000s. Now those stories are, oh, yeah, this 16-year-old's got a drop shipping business and makes like $100,000 a month.

Yeah. Reviews toys on YouTube and is a multi-millionaire. Yeah. Those kind of side hustles happening now as well. Well, I want to know, did you have a side hustle when you were at school? Because, I mean, I had a paper run in something, but maybe something you had initiated. Like you were a wheeler dealer.

A wheeler dealer. Maybe you did a service. Are we accepting young enterprise scheme? No. No, because you don't get to keep the money. No, no, no, no. Yeah, okay. So a side hustle.

How did you make money at school? Did you have a little business? Yeah, you took the initiative and you came up with an idea so that your young ass had a bit of cash. Like this woman making $120, or this girl making $125 a day. That's genius. It's so genius.

Okay, 0800DARLS at Amazon. I'm going to give us a call now. You can text through 9696. Did you have a bit of a side hustle on the go at school? This is really shocking me. People really were making money. I feel like I sort of wasted my time. I could have done things.

You could have been making money at school. I could have. I could have done some piano lessons or something or kisses. My husband used to charge us some kisses at a kissing booth. Just if girls want to practice kissing or something. Or kisses? My husband charges some kisses at a kissing booth. Just if girls want to practice kissing or something? My husband charges schoolmates to pervert his mum sunbathing topless in the backyard. Oh, for God's sake.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That's amazing. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Does the mum know now? Instead of discarding the dirty magazines, Ed and Martha, my husband's dairy,

that's what you do. You cut the thing off and send the cover back of the unsold ones to get some sort of money back. He had to sell them to all the boys at school. His parents would get reimbursed for the unsold magazines for the front being cut off and then he'd hand out pages and sell them page by page. Hell yeah.

My boys sell mandarins at the end of our driveway. Wholesome. That's wholesome My boys sell mandarins at the end of our driveway. Now, thank God. That's wholesome. The good mandarins without the seeds? Because I could be interested in those. Or have we got tight seedy mandarins like Shannon's? Easy peel. Easy peel.

Easy peel. Okay. Shannon's got tight seedy mandarins. The problem is, by the end of the driveway, I don't know until you got home if you've got tight seedy mandarins. We're literally in the group chat. She's called tight seedy mandarins. That's her nickname.

That's her nickname. Yeah. Everybody's got re-nicknames and I'm really mad. She's called Tight Seedy Mandarin. That's her nickname. That's her nickname. Yeah. Everybody's got re-nicknames and I'm really... She's Seedy Tight Mandarin. What are you? It's hard to keep up. Loose. Loose.

Loose Seedless Mandarin. Loose Seedless. Yeah. You've got your pissy lemons. It's great. I was selling smokes to the other degenerates. I'd get the school cleaning lady to buy me two packs each day and sell them as singles. Wait, the school cleaning lady was... Did two packs each day and sell them as singles. Wait, the school cleaning lady was...

Did she get a cut? Ah. Amazing. You'd think so. At least the price of the packet. Someone burning CDs is pretty good. Oh, yes. By request, what do you want?

I want sort of a Limp Bizkit vibe. Yeah, no problem, mate. My son lets his friends hotspot off his phone during school. Oh! Okay, so you're paying for your son's data. Yeah, unlimited data. Getting the old hotspot treat. I like that. Make your money. It's entrepreneurial.

A bit entrepreneurial show there. Good on ya. Good idea. I really wasted school. Made no money at all. I made no money. I spent money. Yeah, I spent more than I made, that's for sure. The ZM Podcast Network. The Fleshborn and Hayley Big Pod. Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to bit more than I made, that's for sure.