ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 27th of February, 2025

Episode Date: February 26, 2025

People are getting pubic hair transplants Tradwives SLP - When there's three toilets, which stall do you pick? Hayley squatting over her phone Top 6 Things to do in AKL if you're already paid to come for Drake Sweatpant jeans The prioritisers Does your name get you into trouble? How much NZ spent online shopping in 2024 When did you embarrass the nation? Fact of the Day Hayley is hiding something she broke What the different levels of cheating areSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years, in the 1970s, the Mr Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of play. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Then he just pulled out a gun, shot her in the back of the head, and then said to Wayne, you're going to help me bury her. This is Mr Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts

From the ZM Podcast Network This is Flesh, Fawn and Hayley's Big Pod Thanks to Animates Making happy happen for pets ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley Thanks Brenny, good morning Welcome to the show Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. Thanks, Brinny. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. Happy Thursday.

Yeah. Secret Sound back at 7 o'clock this morning. Thanks to Super Liquor, $20,000 is the jackpot. So now for that activator. If you're trying to get through it, it'll be just before the news at 7. The top six. Well, Drake. Hey, guys, Drizzy.

Man, after postponing his Auckland shows two weeks, remember when it went from this weekend to a week, a couple of weekends, time 15th of March, he's now just cancelled them full stop. Cancelled the last couple in Aussie. People saying it wasn't selling. Yeah. And then, like, all the tickets kind of went away and people were like, well, what's happening?

And then everyone saw his private jet was going to Fiji. And they're like, oh, well, I guess he's not coming to New Zealand. Is he going to Fiji instead? Yeah. That sucks. And they said, is it a major problem? And they said, probably a minor problem. Oh, God.

He's on trend. That just happened. I know my... He's on trend. He knows his cultural references. I know my current pop cultural references. Yeah. So, no real reason.

Scheduling conflicts, which is a line that they... Always horse shit for not selling well or... Yeah. On a holiday. Doesn't want to or... Can't be bothered. Yeah. Yeah.

Which, man, there'd be some people that have changed their flights and hotels twice. Yes. And I'm saying don't change them again. Okay. There's lots of things to do in Auckland if you're coming from somewhere else around the country. The top six things to do in Auckland on the weekend that was supposed to be the Drake weekend. Play ZM's Fleshborn and Hayley.

Let me tell you the story of Sophia. Sophia is a girl who, she's a healthcare worker, and after years and years of Brazilian waxes and the constant pressure to remain completely hair-free down there. She struggled with sparse and patchy pubic hair. Oh. It had grown back all sort of funny and odd. So she hadn't lasered it?

No, hadn't lasered it. Okay. Not like a lot of us. Yeah. So as a result of that, she was like, this is not, not You know It's all sort of Not looking so great She's tried Various methods Of hair growth

You know Putting serums on And stuff To try to balance it out Oh no Because she was like Why not just Why not just keep

Keep up with the waxing babe Because she wants Because pubes are back babe Pubes are back Are they Pubes are back Like not full on Bushy pubes

No pubes are back Really Yeah yeah Body hair's back body hair's back. Body hair's back in a big way. Which, have we done this as a silly little poll? Pubes. Got your pubes?

Pubes tomorrow? Pubes or no pubes. And maybe we could have a scale. Like, we could have a scale of... Yes, yes, yes, yes. And at one end have a Sasquatch, and at the other end have one of those cats. One of those Sphinx cats with no hair.

Yeah, great. Great idea, great idea. Where are pubes at? 2025 pube check. Yeah, where are we with pubes? Where are we with pubes? Yeah, great. Great idea, great idea. Where are pubes at? 2025 pube check. Yeah, where are we with pubes? Where are we with pubes? Yeah, okay, we'll bring you the results tomorrow. One slide is your current situation,

and the next slide is your desired situation. Right. In both yourself and a partner. Okay, yeah. Because everyone was lasering them. I lasered all mine off, and they were all gone. But they've come back a little bit, because you've got to do sort of maintenance top-ups.

Right. And I think I'm just going to leave them. You're going to leave them? I think so. And just shave or trim or whatever you have? Yeah, maybe just sort of keep it tidy. But it's not all come back. Mine's quite patchy. But I couldn't care less, really. But Sophia didn't like her patchy pubes so hard

that she got a pubic hair transplant. And it has done exactly the way that a hair transplant hair transplant. And it has done exactly the way that a hair transplant has happened. So, hair follicles were taken from the, harvested

from the back of her head. So, think about, my hair is very fine and thin. It's soft, fine, thin hair. Pubic hair's a lot more, it's coarser, isn't it? It's thicker. Imagine if I would have like little sort of dainty, fluffy.

Soft pubes. Feathery, straight pubes. How lovely. You could kind of grow it out and have a fringe. Oh my God, a beautiful little fringe. A mince fringe. A mince fringe. Born Alan Smith.

Stop it. It'll be beautiful. Personal grim mince fringe. So I'm just... Hayley, please don't. Would you go, like, flat across? Like, are we talking a Zooey Deschanel bangs with a minge? Does it have a side part or a middle part?

Is it sort of split in the middle? So I just Googled a pubic hair transplant. This is a cost in US dollars. Turkey. $2,000 to $5,000. It depends on the number of grafts that you need. Jesus Christ, just don't worry about it. Just who cares?

We are of a generation that shaved and or removed the pube, long live the no pube. We did what we did. If we did what we did, we're going to live with our choices. Yeah. And also, this will be like baggy jeans. We'll be back into the skinny jeans in no time. I know, and then we're going to be ripping out our new transplanted mid-trench. Yeah. And also, this will be like baggy jeans. We'll be back into the skinny jeans in no time. I know, and then we're going to be ripping out our new transplanted mid-trench.

Yeah. Ironically, if you went to Turkey, if you were a male, and you went to Turkey for a pubic implant, you'd be going to Turkey to stop it looking like a turkey. You would be. Well, that's true. You would be. Or a hair into the old.

Okay, so in Turkey, it's $1,500 to $3,000. Well, but apparently it's becoming increasingly popular. There's things that happen in the world that I'm just like, imagine explaining it to a Victorian child. Oh, I love that. Like those raves in the sphere in Las Vegas with those big monsters coming forward with all the projections and stuff.

Explain this to a Victorian child. Even explain that to my grandparents. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Explain to my grandparents, Nan, who's still alive, bless her, talked to her on the phone on my birthday, beautiful. Great soul. Please, warriors, you've got to win this year. She loves her warriors.

She loves her warriors. Can you imagine explaining that you're off to Turkey to get some pubes put in? Like, from the back of your head? Yeah. I don't know if I'd want to bring up pube chat with my gran. I don't think I've ever spoken to any of my grandparents, who are all RIP, ever about pubes. That has never come up. I've chatted to probably my mum about pubes, and that's it.

Yeah. But it's just... Just let them be. The world is in no better shape for having this option at all. No. It's sort of, I don't know. Have we had too much? Do you know what I mean?

We've had too much. Are we bored? Absolutely. This is born out, I don't know. Have we had too much? Do you know what I mean? We've had too much. Are we bored? Absolutely. This is born out of boredom. Yeah. There's too much is available to us. We need to get busier. Yeah, we need to get busier

and stop worrying about whether our pears are patchy. Totally, like grow some cauliflower or something. You know, some cabbages. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Hayley. Trad wives is a term you may have heard banted about lately. Stands for traditional wives. Sort of like you think your grandparents' parents. Your Stepford wives.

Yeah. If they were on a farm, you know, she keeps the fire going inside, makes some scones, gets a hot meal on for her man. You know, preserves the fruit. Raises the kids. The woman stays at home while the man works. The woman stays at home, no focus on her career, does all the, you know, bakes a fresh tart.

They love to bake a fresh tart, pastry included. Yeah. The trad wives. It just makes me think of Mad Men, the TV show with John Hammond. 40s, 50s? Yeah, like the wives that were at home and they were just miserable. Yeah, how happy were they? A Harvard youth poll.

So this is the Harvard, the university, the home of progressive. Yeah, is she at Harvard? She's at one of those East Coast super schools. Yeah, she's at Harvard. Well, she's actually mentioned in this article I read

figures like Jacinda and Alexandra Ocasio-Cortez, AOC they call her. The old AOC. These young, progressive, left-leaning females leading the charge and inspiring a generation of women to stand up and say, no more. Yes. Or we will be listened to.

Yeah, modern Kate Shepards. Well, according to this Harvard Youth Poll, US voters between 18 and 24 are becoming more conservative. Oh. Which, I know, compared to slightly older generations like us millennials. Yes. We were out there. And, you know, now the trad wife movement is like,

this is the situation. I've seen jokes online of women crying in their car being like, why did the likes of Kate Shepard put up there? Screw Kate Shepard. Yeah, screw Kate Shepard. I could be at home right now, but now I have to go to work. Shut your mouth. I can't imagine you being a trade wife.

Oh, yuck. That'd be the last thing you'd want. Do you know, and this is a great segue actually to talk about maths. Yep. There is a. It's really not. There is. Thank you so much for opening up this door for me actually for one.

To talk about maths. What a friend. But there is one bride on there who that's her dream is to be, to serve her man basically. What's, I don't get what is the, what's the root of it? Like where's the's, I don't get, what is the, what's the root of it? Like, where's the satisfaction? I don't know. Where's the personal satisfaction? Who raised these women? I don't know. Gen Z's at the

prod desk, Carwin and Shannon, because there was a few, like, TikTokers that went really famous, like, blew up for kind of posing as these trad wives with the dresses and the makeup and the making things. Yeah, Nara Smith is one of my favourite influencers. And she'll post being like,

my children want mac and cheese for dinner, so I'm going to make cheese from scratch. Yeah, and I'm going to make pasta from scratch. She'll like mill flour herself and all that. And it kind of started this whole movement. But I think like most things related to Gen Z, we don't really know what we want because there's times where I watch her and I'm like, this is all I want in life

I'm going to quit and I'm going to make cheese from scratch. She's 23 years old and described as a fashion model and internet personality now she hasn't had a dose of real life yet not yet. She's 23 for a start, let's see how trad wife's going in 7 years.

You know, when you're ticking over 30 and you're like, uh-oh. Also, she said she doesn't want a job, but her job is being a social media influencer. Yeah, she's working a lot more. You actually are working. If you're at home actually having no stimulation and no means of expressing yourself like on social media, it's a different story, isn't it?

Yeah, I think she's quite self-aware and i think people watching it are like oh my goodness this would be so fun but then if you actually imagine sitting at home and churning butter every day i think it wouldn't be as fun have you guys seen that video of the older is she um Amish maybe, churning butter? And she's really like plunging the pole. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The old butter churn, the old up and down butter churn.

Yeah, it's good, it's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's really giving that thing play. Well, so you like it because it looks like, oh my God. It looks like she's doing two-hander. She's got a two-hander on her hands there. Twisting motion.

Hayley. She's got a twisting motion. Sprout. Up and down, round and round. Good for her. Do you know the thing? The thing is it's like I think a lot of the TikTokers and Instagrammers are self-aware of this, like trad wives,

but they're not actually trad wives. But you just worry about younger people on social media being like, oh, I can just stay at home. It's the problem with the entire social media is you're seeing part of their day that they selected to portray as the rest of their day and it's not. Yeah. The rest of their day

they're like doing all modern things. I am so close to saying we just switch off the internet. Yes. I know but I do. We send such funny memes to each other.

In the cat videos. We send such funny reels. You gonna miss out on the reels Vaughn? I just think the bad is starting to outweigh the good. Yeah I think you're right though. I think we're. Okay Fletch today we need to send Vaughn some more cat memes the bad is starting to outweigh the good. Yeah I think you're right though. I think we're

Okay Fletch today we need to send Vaughn some more cat memes. Some great memes. Some really great reels. Bring them back. I'm going to switch off the world's modem at the wall. No don't you dare. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley Silly little poe, silly

little poe. It is so silly, silly, silly that a silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Well, silly little poles looking into which toilet you'd use if there were three toilets. Not urinals, eh? Not urinals. So you walk into the bathroom and it's one, two, three. Left, middle, right. Which stall do you pick?

They're all identical. Always left. Me too. Always left. Yeah, I'd go left or right. I wouldn't never go middle. Here at work I go left because it's the roomier toilet. It's this lovely big toilet.

It's an accessible toilet. It's actually accessible. It's very accessible. The door's even bigger. That's for people that would need more space for. That's actually accessible. It's very accessible. The door's even bigger. But that's for people that would need more space for. Yeah, I do. I get a little bit agoraphobic,

claustrophobic. I've got all the phobics. I'd always go left or... Homophobic, transphobic. I can do it all and then there's so much room. I would go left or right. Never middle

because if you go middle of three toilets, there's always a chance... You'll be flanked. You'll be flanked. You're going to be flanked. I'm sorry. There's going to be someone right next to you. I'm a military man.... You'll be flanked. You'll be flanked. You're going to be flanked. I'm sorry. There's going to be someone right next to you. I'm a military man.

I can't be flanked. Can't be flanked. If I'm going left, then the next person who comes in goes right. If a third person comes in, so be it, they're in the middle. They're in the middle. Yeah. Spot. Yeah.

Unbelievable. No, no, no. If you're in the middle, you're guaranteed to be flanked. There is a study that looked at this, and which one is the cleanest toilet, based on how humans decide. Oh, go on then. study that looked at this and which one is the cleanest toilet based on how humans decide. Because you're right, the one that everyone

picks is also the dirtiest. Never thought about that. Yes, exactly. And that's what this study looked at. So researchers found that humans have a natural preference for middle cubicles. What? What? So avoiding middle is a good strategy to find a cleaner one.

It looked into the study at Divided Men and Women. Men should choose the cubicle furthest from the door because they tend to prefer the middle or the ones closest to the door. Crazy. Women should choose the cubicle closer to the door since they often prefer to go further away. Yeah. So in short, to get the cleanest toilet,

aim for the cubicle least likely to be picked by others, and that's usually at the ends of the row. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So people pooping in the middle. People pooping in the middle. Have you ever walked into like an airport and they've got like 10 cubicles in a row? Yeah.

If you walked right to the end... Chances are it's the cleanest. Yeah, because most people would be like ducking in quickly. That's good, because that's where I go. I don't want to go as far away. But then does everybody go to the end? That's what I mean. Reverse psychology.

Well, our stats don't stack up. Okay. If you walk into a bathroom and there's three toilets, which store do you pick? Left wins on 49% of people who chose left. 34% of people chose right.. 34% of people chose right and 17% of people chose the middle. So the middle should be according to that study the deadliest.

But they don't want to be flanked. People don't want to be flanked. Maybe as New Zealanders, because of our involvement in both World Wars and the crucial role we played in them we know about flanking and you can't get pincered. Don't want to be pincered. Don't want to be pincered, and that's in the middle. You're going to be pincered.

That's a flank on both sides. People are thinking about work, right? Like, if you're in the middle cubicle, you're going to be sitting right next to someone you work with. I must say, the other day I went for a Swifter Blues Shoes post show, and someone was having a real time in there. Oh, really? A tough time.

Were you flanking them or being flanked? No, I believe we were at either end. So should someone else have come in, they would have been flanked by us. Yeah. Horrible. Yeah. All right. Some feedback on this.

Trip D says, people don't like walking further. Hence, I always go to the one furthest away. Oh, yeah. Which isn't used as much. Because we didn't ask you which one would be the cleanest toilet. No, we just asked you which one you use. Which one do you go to? We gotcha.

We're more about privacy than we are about cleanliness. No one chooses the middle, therefore it's the cleanest, in my opinion, said Louise. But this study would say otherwise, Louise. Even though our study says you're right. Ruben, I picked right because people read left to right. So I'd look at the left toilet first and then use it more frequently. Therefore, the right toilet should be the cleanest as it would be the least used. If you walked into this scenario, but the door, you were coming in and you were in front of the right-hand side toilet,

would you be more likely to go there or still left? Because that's me. In the women's toilets, I walk and I'm in front of the right, so I still go left. But if I came in and I was in front of the left, I think I'm still going left. I'm left leaning. Yeah, okay. Politically and

with my hand. Geordie says, whichever one is closest to the far wall because it means more privacy, especially if the doors have those see-through cracks.

He doesn't want to be flanked. She. She doesn't want to be flanked. She doesn't want to be flanked. She's a clever girl.

She doesn't want to be pincered in the Moroccan desert by the Nazis and the Italians. Who wants to be pincered by the Nazis? No one wants to be pinc. She doesn't want to be flanked. She's a clever girl. She doesn't want to be pincered in the Moroccan desert by the Nazis and the Italians. Who wants to be pincered by the Nazis? No one wants to be pincered by the Nazis or the Italians. No. I think there's a bit of a hangover for the stall etiquette from the urinal, says Brett. If there's

one available at the end, I'll always take that one. But if someone is in that one, I'll take the next one available, ensuring that there's at least a cubicle between me and the other pooper. Yeah. I mean, urinal etiquette's a completely different beast. Well, yeah. I mean, if you're at a busy concert or sports event,

you just have to get in there, don't you? Stand next to the guy with the biggest dick. What did you say? What was your one? You stand next to the guy with the biggest... Yeah, so you can have a look. No, you just... But then that's going to make yours just look even smaller.

Yeah, but you still get to see a big dick, so... I mean, it's a win-win. You've been very naughty this morning. I know mine's small regardless. So if I stand at the end and it's small and I only get to see mine, lose, lose. But if I know mine's small and I get to see a big one, that's lose, win.

Lose, win. But that's not good for the ego, is it? The ego's gone. It's gone. It's unrecoverable. Okay. It's that small? It's It's gone. It's unrecoverable. Okay. It's that small?

It's unrecoverable? It's unrecoverable. Wow. Emma said the closest one to the entry, apparently it's the cleanest. Yeah, it is. Her stats line up with what your study says. Yeah, but then I don't think that they line up with our poll results.

No, interesting. Vicky has a completely different take. Vicky. Vicky. Vicky. I give a quick scan as I walk in for the one that's got the most toilet paper. Oh. Oh, it's the last thing I look for.

I've actually been caught short where you finish up and you go to get the toilet paper and you pull it. Oh, no, you always check. Only two sheets left. Do you ever put your hand under the next cubicle and be like, help a brother out? Toilet paper, please. Yeah, yeah. And then they give you five.

Yeah, and you're like, no, no. Yeah. Can't wipe my tush with that. Nah. Whatever one has the light over the top of it, said Lauren. Oh, I don't want to be well lit. I don't want to be well lit. Dim, dim, dim, dim.

I don't want to be well lit. Quite the shame of using a public toilet. Yeah. So much shame involved. I'm left-handed, so I always go to the left, said Sigourney. Weaver, I assume. Weaver. She's such a big fan of the show.

It's lovely to have Sigourney Weaver listening to the show. Huge fan of the Alien franchise. Yeah. She did great on that. Yes, she was. Love everything you do. Oh, man, I picked the left,

but now I see it's the majority, so I'm going to start using the middle now. They're the lesser used toilets, said Casey. Yeah. That's why we can all... It sounds like it is. All learn.

Wow, that's a little pop. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. I'm actually feeling quite good today after my surgery on Tuesday. Tuesday? Yeah, good recovery. Yeah, I had a Bartholin cyst removed from my vagina. I was cut out of my vaginal canal.

And it was sore. It was really, it was quite, it was not great. I could imagine. Yeah, yeah, it was quite a lot. And then yesterday, because it's quite low down, yesterday I was like, I wonder what it was looking like down there. Because you could see it previously. Yeah, you could see it bulging.

Oh. That's like, I reckon that's the hottest thing you've ever said. Yeah, I think so. That you could see my Bartholin sis bulging to the naked eye. Is that your Bartholin sister? Are you pleased to see me? Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

But this is quite a common thing that happens. Really common. Yeah. They can be small. They can be large. Mine was rather large. And so I was like, I'm going to have a little look. But do you know what I don't have in my house is like just a

handheld mirror or anything like that. I don't have like a mirror on a stick or something. Or like a small mirror I could take off the wall. Like a lady's pocket mirror. With a matching brush. My mum had that. I can still picture it. Oh bless. It was quite decorative. It was quite that. I can still picture it. Oh, bless.

It was quite decorative. It was quite ornate. Oh, yeah. A lot of them have like embroidery in the back. I think my grandma got one and she inherited it from her mother when she passed.

Maybe could we borrow Christine's mirror brush set so Hayley can look at her vag? Right, so I can, yeah, have a little puppet spot. Hey, mum, do you still have your... Well, no, but now thanks to the

beauty of modern technology, I was like, oh, I have my phone. Oh, God. So picture this, right? Picture this. Yesterday I turn on my front-facing camera like that and I pop it on the bathroom floor and I drop it low. Dip it low, pick it up slow.

Yeah, yeah. Move it all around. Something, something, something back pops. Pop the pop, pop that thing. Pop that thing. Okay. I'm going to show you how to make your man sing. So you're like squatting over your phone camera.

Which I encourage. And you know, if you listen to Sex.Live season one, this is something encouraged by people. We've got to look, we've got to check out our junk. Your junk is just out and about and you get to see it all the time. Ours is a lot more tucked away. Not if you've got a little tum-tum. Sometimes it can block it.

Yeah, that's right. That's why you need a little mirror brush set. So you can check out yours as well. I've got two reasons to ask my mum if I can have her

mirror brush set. Yeah, that's right. Three, because she's getting those pubic implants and she's going to need a brush to brush her... To brush my new... So I was over this but then I couldn't see.

Do you think playing Christina Milian's Dip It Low, Pick It Up Slow in the background would add a little something to this? I think it would. I've got to tee it up. I actually think it would. Yeah, maybe. Yeah, great. I forgot about the sort of Asian vibe at the top.

Could have a sitar. Is it a sitar or a sitar-adjacent instrument? I'm not sure. Anyway, so this is me in the bathroom dropping it low over my front-facing camera. But then the camera's not a good reflection, right? So I had to take a photo so then I could stand up, stop dropping it low. And then look at the photo. And look at the photo.

Did you put it on a timer? No. Or did you reach around? I should have. So then that was the awkward bit, was I'm there and I'm trying to reach around without blocking the camera to tap the... You know you're wearing an Apple Watch, right? Yeah, and I forgot.

I was trying to tap the dot to take the photo. Literally got a camera remote on it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. With a timer. I forgot about that function. And I'm trying to tap the thing and it kept swiping it it into, like, portrait mode or, like, panorama. We're going to do a panorama of the whole situation. I don't need a panorama of this itch.

So I kept, I eventually got it, but it was very, very awkward. Wait, so there is a photo on your phone of that? Well, it's deleted. It's in my deleted albums. Okay, good, yeah. But I had a look. She's looking all right. Okay, good.

Because you don't want that in your photos and then accidentally post it as a story. It wouldn't have gone to iCloud, eh? Let me just open up my library. I think you've got to delete it from... Nah, we're good. There should be a button on the iPhone that's like delete,

because then it goes to deleted items, delete from deleted items, delete from digital existence 100% never to be seen again. Burn from the earth. Burn from the earth. Well, that photo, even though everything's looking good, post-surgery. We're looking all right. Do you know what you're looking for?

No, I was just looking to see if you could see the stitches and things. Right. No, there was some discoloration and some swelling, but that was it. Yes, they do dissolve rather than get them taken out. I know, because you ever imagine that. Your Bartholomew Simpson sister's than get them taken out. I know, because you mentioned that. Bartholomew Simpson's sister's gone. It's gone. It said, don't have a cow, man. Eat my shorts.

It said, eat my shorts. ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. From Vaughn's free trial of Microsoft Word, this is the Top 6. Hello there. Well, I bring you bad news. Who are you? Brad? I'm bad news Brad.

Drake's cancelled his shows in Auckland. If you're waking up to this news and you heard Drake tickets, I apologise. If you are, I don't know where I apologise. People had kind of seen this coming for the last couple of days. A lot of rumours. Flip-flopping. Yeah. But maybe you got flights and you moved them from this weekend

coming to the weekend and a couple of times where it was supposed to be happening, where it was rescheduled to, and you change it to that, and you're just like, God damn it. And you can't get a refund and the accommodation's booked and everything. Panic not. I've got six things to do in Auckland without Drake. Okay. Number six on the list.

These are things that are actually happening. Advanced sea survival at the Te Atatu Boat Club. Advanced sea survival? Our two-day advanced sea survival course equips you with the theoretical knowledge and practical knowledge and cover a wide range of emergency scenarios to survive at sea. Oh, Vaughan, I don't know if that's going to be the Drake concert. Yeah, that's not an equal sort of replacement. This certificate is required by Maritime New Zealand

for 30% of the crew from recreational launches and yachts heading offshore, but it is not an NZQA qualified course. It's valid for five years. Get it done in a weekend. Okay, okay. It wouldn't hurt to have it. No. Did we leave work at the same time yesterday?

Yeah. Did you see that? The three or four people who obviously worked on a super yacht in their super yacht uniform walking down the road? I did not. There was something for everybody. Oh, damn. Very dapper.

She's kiss. Number five on the list of the top six things to do in Auckland without Drake the weekend that he's cancelled is Sothalia at the Bruce Mason Unforgettable Night of Music and Melody, a remarkable event organised by Shark Entertainment and proudly powered by New Zealandkins. Now, that's the New Zealand Sri Lankan community. And you know we're huge with the Sri Lankan community.

We are. Yeah, but it's no drink, is it? It's a night. Well, isn't it? Because we'll have a captivating performance from romanticist Shandana Layana Richichi. Oh, there you go. And Milotis Narosha

Vingeni. The powerful voices paired with enchanting melodies take the audience on an unforgettable musical journey. So he is Sri Lankan's Drake. Okay. Okay, right. Number four on the list of the top six things to do in Auckland for the weekend without Drake. Friday night, She

Had at Spark Arena. It's their final tour gig and I just think as a New Zealander, you should probably see She Had before they stop. You're quite the antithesis of Drake. I don't know that

there's much crossover in fan base wise. But She Had. She Had. You've got to see them. Number three on the list of the top six things to do in Auckland

that weekend without Drake. I'm pleased to tell you it's single night at the Room You Wear A Club. Join us for an unforgettable evening at the singles night at the Rumiwara Club. Oh. Join us for an unforgettable evening at the singles night at the prestigious Rumiwara Club.

$20 on the door to get in. Cash, please. No F-boss. Cash. Maybe you could score some kind of like rich Rumiwara widower. Yeah.

Get in there. Get the mansion. Get ready to dance the night away to the incredible tunes of Going Bananas, one of the leading DJs in town with a curated playlist of all the hits the one of the leading DJs in town. With a curated playlist

of all the hits to dance for, we'll be buzzing. Sounds fun. Yeah, if you're into stale, pale and male. That's us. That's for you. Number two on the list of the top six things to do that weekend that Drake's cancelled, Shea Fu is playing. Shea Fu? He's New Zealand's

Drake before there was even Drake, Drake. Yeah. And he's playing three gigs on the Saturday. I just looked at the Shefu. The guy's playing from pretty much March 6th to March 20th, something multiple gigs a day around Auckland Central. Busy. And number one on the list of the top six things to do that weekend that Drake's cancelled if you're in Auckland,

pop up to 76 Riverside Road, Oruwa, and enjoy South African bits and brews. Right. Right, yes. Is there anywhere to park the car? I don't know where would I park the car. I'm actually going to back to Yubra because I'm going to drink some of them brews. Right. I'm going to get on the lash.

Now, that's smart. Yes, it's smart, man. Really smart. Well, I had to do my thinking. Oh, he lost it. He lost it. Lost it. Lost it.

You can all have a lot of fun. No, lost it. God damn it, it was there. Just tap out. I'm tapping out. That is the day. Stop saying that. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley.

Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. We all remember the humble jegging. Is it a pair of jeans? Nah, honey, that's a legging. And boy, oh boy, were they unflattering. Like a denim printed onto a spandex. Skin tight. It was a vibe for a while, but it was all about comfort, right?

And everyone was like, we want to have a stretchy thing. We're not wearing jeans anymore. They're suffocating us and we refuse to be suffocated any longer. So they weren't anything like a denim. No. It was often like screen printed onto spandex. Right. A denim look.

So it was the lead into athleisure. So it was a legging. That's why we call it jeggings. I don't think you've understood the name. So instead of jeans, they were leggings. Right. So they combined the words together to make jeggings. Right.

He hasn't understood. That's okay. I'm not following. Well, don't worry about them because they're gone, right? Jeggings went out of fashion a long time ago. And now we need to put a name to this. It's a you know how baggy jeans are kind of popular?

It's a baggy jean track pant. So it looks like a baggy jean but it's a track pant. Oh no no no no. With all the stretch and room and back look at that stretch there. They really look like jeans, don't they? Not great on the back. From a distance. Yeah, saggy on and back. Look at that stretch there. They really look like jeans, don't they?

Not great on the back. From a distance. Saggy baggy. Yeah, saggy on the back. So if a jean legging was a jegging, what's a jean sweatpant? Sweatpant. Schweins. Sweatpant.

Schweins. Schweins. Schweins. Schweins. Schweins. Now, Carwen and Shannon, as fellow fashion girlies, would you wear these shweens? You know what?

Probably. So they're just your standard track pants, but they're screen printed to look like jeans. Yeah, they're made to look like jeans. I would say that jiggings looked more like jeans than these look like jeans. Yeah, these look like straight up. These shweens look like track pants. I kind of like the cut of them yeah so in theory like yeah but why

not just go to regular gray sweatpants sweatpants yeah well i think that's not office appropriate yeah oh yeah people are styling them with kitten heels like people wearing heels with track pants and i just think that's incredible that i think I can kind of get behind it until you look at the fake pockets. A screen printed pocket is criminal. Like these videos from a distance. A screen printed pocket? Yeah. No, no, no. Don't screen print it on if it's not

serving a practical purpose. Yeah, and I've seen a few. So it's got a screen printed front pocket as a jean normally does but then has functional sweat pant pockets on the side and then a screen printed butt pocket. These shweens are really confused. That's a good name though, eh shweens?

Shweens! Not sweatpants. You've got to say it like that though. Shweens! What should we wear today? Shall I wear some shorts or my shweens? Could we get some shweens shawarts? We could get some shweens shawarts. You love your jean shorts. Yeah.

That's perfect. I love track shorts. Yeah. So Shaween Shawartz. You could absolutely. But you should patent this. It also sounds like a movie production house run by two prominent Jewish families. Shaween and Shawartz.

It sounds like I'd see this on Shark Tank, honestly. Yeah, Shaween Schwartz. Hi, we're Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. And today, sharks, we're looking for $100,000 for a 0.1% stake in our company, Shaween Schwartz. And he goes, Shaween. This is great. Great idea.

What do you get on Shark Tank? These would be great for travelling. I mean, sweatpants are great for travelling, but these just have a little bit more sophistication for the airport. You could put a blazer on. Yeah, for the airport, a little bit more sophistication. You could, a kitten heel and a blazer. Like, you might even get a complimentary upgrade.

Because I go, lovely, she's worn denim on air. Yeah. On board, sorry. Because you're never getting a complimentary upgrade in, like, sweatpants. It never works. My parents do this. They dress up for the flight hoping that they'll get a little. Yeah, yeah.

Honestly, it's so dumb. My dad's in jeans and like a sports coat. My mum will be in like a nicer outfit. Oh, really? My dad's in his good shorts and some strappy sandals with Velcro. Oh, yeah, that's not getting you an upgrade. Yeah, but he's got some socks in his bag in case his feet get cold. Oh, he don't want chilly tuts.

But very rarely do they. No. The man lives in shorts and jandals. Now he can upgrade his dressy shorts to some... To some shween shorts. To some shween shorts. I love it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

It's hanging over me like a dark cloud. This to-do list of mine. It's so long. Two things freak me out. I've seen her to-do list And I've seen her calendar On her computer Oh my god I know Where it's got all of your

Like appointments And like stand-up dates And like gigs And all this And I'm just like Too much Too much It's a lot

You are one of the Hardest looking people I know Guys I didn't come here For compliments And well no Vaughn also does You know he trimmed his beard The other day

And his peeps And the hedges Yeah and the hedges. Yeah, and the hedges. I love trimming. You're very hardworking at home. Busy boy. But it's not stuff in your calendar and not on your to-do list. No, no, no, I just do it.

And then I get distracted by the other thing and then I ADHD around the property for a bit. Yeah. Self-diagnose. Yeah, I just self-diagnose myself. So you don't do a to-do list? I do, I do. Do you do a pen and paper? Notes.

Only when I'm feeling overwhelmed I do a to-do list. But I do everything I can to avoid feeling overwhelmed. Right. So mine is like, and mine varies from like, there's one I need to chase up my accountant to get a business number for Australia because otherwise I can't make money when I go and work there in a few months' time.

That's a major one. I've really got to sort that out. Time's ticking. There's also, like, clean the dishwasher filter. Do you know what I mean? So it varies. Okay, yeah. Because you know what?

I've had that kitchen's been in there for two years and I've never cleaned that dishwasher filter. Do you know how many peas and bits of corn is going to be in there? Dude, as the assigned dishwasher cleaner, I will reiterate, again, rinse it before you put it in. No. No, I just read another thing the other day about it was a dishwasher expert

who said you never, don't do it. Dishwasher expert isn't getting down on their hands and knees and taking out the slidey drawers and everything and getting all the grime and everything off them and then taking out the filter thing. She feels to me that Vaughn's actually volunteered to take one of the things off of my reminders list. I do get a satisfaction

out of cleaning a dishwasher, but I would have to do it less often if everybody just rinsed properly. No. So anyway, I look at my to-do list and it's overwhelming and I was like,

the other day I tried to prioritise it and it's too hard and I was like, I can't be the only one suffering for this and I think that you and I, I don't like dealing with my own problems,

but I'm happy to help others deal with theirs. See, some advice. So this is the idea for a, maybe it could be a segment. A segment, the prioritisers, right? Oh, I like dealing with my own problems, but I'm happy to help others deal with theirs. See, some advice. So this is the idea for a, maybe it could be a segment. A segment, the prioritizers, right? Oh, I like that. I want to hear from you. Text us 9696 if you've got an overwhelming to-do list.

Oh, 800-DARLS-IT-EM. Yeah, we'll run through a couple of things on your to-do list. We'll choose one and we're going to help you do it. And we're going to... But not actually, like, physically. I'm not providing you any money. I'm not going around to someone's house and emptying their dishwasher. No, but we're going to... But not actually, like, physically. I'm not providing you any money. I'm not going around to someone's house

and emptying their dishwasher. No, but we're going to prioritise one of those things. I would if it was on the way home because I like looking at people's houses.

Actually, I wouldn't mind a little nosy. You are very nosy. It depends. You should just have an open home so I can have a nosy house. Quite often,

a lot of the things on people's to-do list, it needs a bit of thought. It needs a bit of thought or it just needs a little bit of motivation in someone to help you make the decision around things. So that is what we will do for you this morning.

Emily's called in. Good morning, Emily. Good morning. Good morning. What is on your to-do list that you'd like our advice? I just need to buy my partner's birthday present. Oh. Okay, well, describe your partner. I don't want to assume. Is your partner male or female. Oh. Okay, well, describe your partner.

I don't want to assume. Is your partner male or female? Male. Okay. Yeah. How old is he? I wasn't getting lesbian vibes. I would have straight away said.

Your gator is honed. I'm like one of those underground. You're the Chinese warship of the gay ocean. No, I'm the submarine you can't see below. Oh, you're a sub. That is. You're a bottom. You're a bottom sub.

He's a sub at the bottom. I'm a big top warship. I wouldn't have picked it. Yeah, I can't. My gay dad's not tuned in, but when I shoot my torpedo... Okay, Emily, we need a... How old's he turning? He is turning 36.

Oh, okay, turning 36. We need to know a little bit more about this guy. What are some of his hobbies or interests? He loves the beach, so he's into surfing. He's a really hard-working family man. Okay, so there's kids. What about those Yeti coolers? Well, let me finish.

Let us finish first. Okay, okay, okay. I got excited. It's just a beach. Family man, you've got kids? Yes. How long have you been together? How long have you been together? How long have you been together?

This will be our 11th year. Oh, okay. This is a problem. It's a real struggle finding a present after all this time. All these years you're late. Just get yourself. What kind of budget are we talking? Well, he deserves the world, right?

But you just don't always have that much to give. We're going to have to pay something, though. Don't, no. Don't listen to him. You shut up. You shut up. We're not after paying this. We're not getting ourselves into debt for presents.

How much? Oh, $100? Yeah, that's good. That's good. Maybe $200? No, no, no. No, $150 max. Just out of interest,

what do you think you spent on your last birthday present? Not that it's important. We shouldn't compare these things, but if we were to run a comparison. It's not a competition. I think I said don't worry about it because it's okay. Did you pick up on that? Well, sometimes you mean that, right?

No. Sometimes you mean that. It's a whole other language. Oh, I don't need any presents. It's not about me. Oh, my God, I can't believe you didn't buy me a gift. You're a pig. What about a, I'm just thinking, for sake of ease,

a voucher for an outdoor store? A voucher? It's not very sexy. It's not loving enough. What about what you said, like a Yeti cooler? Maybe if you don't want to spend that much, like a Tumblr cooler or something for the beach. When he goes to the beach, keep his beers, he's cold.

Oh, yeah. I've got a husky one. Maybe the Yeti one. He's already got one. got a husky one. Maybe the Yeti one. He's already got one. He's already got one. He's already got one. This is a hard thing. 36-year-old men just kind of buy themselves things they want, right?

No, my mum bought him that. Oh, okay. Good old mum, eh? She's making a move on your man. What about like a, because we always think outdoorsy masculine things, but this is a father. He's a busy boy. She said he deserves the world, like a massage. Like a really nice massage.

Yeah. Loves a massage. Loves a massage. Get him a day spa, Voucher. Yeah, like a fancy one so he can like... I can just see him with cucumbers on his eyes. Yeah, exactly. Treat himself. Or just the mall one under the escalator. Magic fingers. Magic fingers. Fanny's massage. No, not Fanny's massage.

Not Fanny's magic fingers. Why is it not Fanny's magic fingers? No, it's too tough. I've cried in that chair. You've had a lovely massage with Fanny's magic fingers. Why is it not Fanny's magic fingers? No, it's too tough. I've cried in that chair. You've had a lovely massage with Fanny's magic fingers. No, no, no, no. But the good thing about this, Emily, is you can tick it off now because you just go and order it online, it'll arrive, then you're fine. Perfect.

Thank you so much. Have we helped? You should help. Oh, that's great. I think we've helped. That's lovely. Tell him to send us a photo. We've got Louise who's called through.

Good morning, Louise. What can we help you on your to-do list? Kia ora. Kia ora. I've got, it's a bit overwhelming, really. I've got to book flights and accommodation. Goodness. For an overseas nursing conference.

Oh, okay. Wow. For yourself or many people? No, just for me. Where are you going? When are you going? And please don't say in the next month. It's June and I'm going to Helsinki.

Oh! Nice. Now, is work paying for this or are you paying for this? Work's given me the study leave and they've paid for the registration for the conference. And the reason why it's still on the to-do list is I've made applications for grants because it's quite an obscure time in healthcare at the moment.

Right. So I've made applications for grants. I'm just waiting on the outcome of those. Right. So then you've kind for grants. I'm just waiting on the outcome of those. Right. And then you can book. So then you've

kind of got to wait for that, do you? Yeah, and it's catch 22, eh? Because the nearer you get to it, the more expensive

it is and the less accommodation options there are. So when they give you the grants, they'll just give you the cash.

They're not going to say, okay, tell us where to book or we'll buy you flight credit. So if you

purchase the tickets, the grants would reimburse So if you purchase the tickets, the grants would reimburse you for the purchase. Yeah, theoretically. If the grant covers, because the grants are like bets. So there's like... So you can't be too OTTI. I was about to say, if work's paying, let's go business. I just looked at flights in June, like 2,400, 2,500.

That's not bad. For Europe post-pandemic. Yeah, absolutely. That's good. Do you know what you... Okay, this is what I do sometimes with my to-do list, is to do one thing on my to-do list, I add more things to the to-do list. So you need to chase... So today, you need to chase

the grants, because you're paralysed until we've got the grants through. Yeah, absolutely. And they're coming through, hopefully, hopefully the end of February, beginning of March. No, but I never wait. I pick up the phone. I'm like, hey, can I take a little update? But Fletch will 100% book those flights for you

when you're ready. Because look at him. He's got the thing open. His nipples are stiff. His nipples are erect. You know I love booking. His pupils have dilated. Yeah, I love booking.

You're dribbling, babs. Yeah, yeah. Well, Hayley, I'm going to book Hayley's flight soon. I know, he's so excited. She's dilly-dallying around.ling, babes. Yeah, yeah. I'm going to book Hayley's flight soon. I know, he's so excited. She's dilly-dallying around. Okay, good luck. Chase the grants.

I reckon that's the first thing. Amy, last caller, we're going to help you with something on your to-do list. You need a paint colour. Oh. Yes, I do. Okay, okay. What are you painting? Our house.

Inside or outside? Outside, sorry, exterior. Okay, okay. Are we thinking light? I just painted my entire house. Inside or outside? Outside, sorry, exterior. Okay, okay. Are we thinking light? I just painted my entire house. Okay, are you thinking light, classic, or something fun? Well, it's like a weatherboard. I'm thinking white trim. We've got a farm let.

Vaughan and I have had a discussion a few times about our mutual love of coony coony pigs. We've got one. Oh, yeah, they're great. Great pigs, great pigs. More like dogs. of coony coony pigs we've got one oh yeah they're great great pigs more like um white trim and i'm thinking like maybe bluey but gray but you're thinking duck egg okay so on the trims we're going half bianca razine this is what we're doing i need a pen okay so half bianca razine on the trims that's like it's like a creamy slightly darker white and if it gets dirty you can't even

tell it's incredible. Oh, it hides the dust. I like that. That's important. Yeah, it hides the dust. That's important. Yeah, and then for the outside, we're going to go Muse Duck Egg Blue. This is like the most classic homesteady kind of resin colour.

Yeah. Look it up. Muse Duck Egg Blue. Oh, that's ticked off the list. I actually really like that. Just like that. I'm looking at it now. Yeah, Duck Egg Blue. Oh, that's ticked off the list. I actually really like that. Just like that. I'm looking at it now. Yeah, Duck Egg Blue.

I am worried. I think you've just nailed that. I think you've just nailed that. I found an article from 2019 saying we're going going. It's timeless. It's timeless. Duck Egg Blue. It better be girlfriend because that's six years ago.

Weatherboard hosted. We're going Duck Egg Blue on the weatherboards and we're going Half Bianca on the trims. Oh, my God. Nailed that. Love that. We all have our strengths. Amy, there you go.'re going half Bianca on the trims. Oh, my God, now that. Love that. We all have our strengths. Amy, there you go.

Take that off the list. Yep, done. Thank you. We're not helping paint, though. We're not actually doing the painting. I was so excited about a working bee, but okay. I love a working bee. Cut her off.

Cut her off. Cut her off. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. We want to know if your name causes you a bit of trouble because the surname Null, N-U-L-L, is apparently causing a few people a bit of issues. Like null and void? Yeah. Is that some kind of computer?

Yeah, if a box is left empty, it's null. It will often say null when you go to submit it. Exactly. So on certain programs and computer software, null kind of empties itself. And if you don't have anything in the box, it'll go

null. But when your surname is null, then it's not actually putting your surname in. It thinks that you're meaning nothing. I don't have a surname. The surname is the compulsory box. Is the compulsory box. Yeah. So there is a guy surname. And often the surname is the compulsory box. Is the compulsory box. Yeah. So there is a guy, for example, his surname is Null,

and any time he tries to book something online, like a hotel room or something, the form keeps coming back. And he's like, I can't bloody do this. And then, so that's caused a lot of issues for him. Then there was another person with a surname Null, and then they got a personalised number plate that said Null, and then they got all these random traffic tickets from across the country for some reason.

Because I guess, like, there's a glitch in the system. If the plate registers as Null, because it can't read it perfectly, it must just pop in the system. If the plate registers as null because it can't read it perfectly, it must just pop in null. It's got a history of Jewish with a German variant. As a surname. But even when you Google what is the meaning of null

last name, it will bring up null and void. No value, no meaning. Like I had to scroll down to actually get the definition of null. So apparently like computer systems are working this meaning. Like I had to scroll down to actually get the definition of null. Yeah, so apparently like computer systems are working this out. Like null won't be used that much anymore. But it's still like a massive problem.

It's like people with a difficult last name or first name. You're constantly having to spell it. You're constantly having to explain it. I've told you about this about my friend that I travelled the world with when we were marching together, K.O. Her name is capital K, space, capital O. No dot, not joined together. What do you mean?

K.O. Dad liked boxing? Yeah. You're kidding me. I thought you were going to say like they were... K.O. is just her first name. Yeah, K.O. I thought it was like maybe of Asian origin, Ko.

No, yeah. Like Lydia Ko. Yeah, K-O. I thought it was like a maybe of Asian origin, Ko. No, yeah. Like Lydia Ko. Yeah, so people call her Ko, or if she says her name's K-O, they spell it K-A-Y-O. Yeah, yeah, that's how I would spell it. K-A-Y-O-H. So we've travelled around together before, and people always mix it up,

and so when your passport doesn't match your ticket, it just all causes all these dramas. Right. And she was like, why did my parents do that? What are her siblings' names? TKO. Yeah. Because can you even book

a ticket with T space O? I don't know. As a first name? I don't know. I think often it would just shorten it to co. Anyway. Take the space out.

What gave her a lot of trouble? And this is what we want to know this morning. Do you have a name that, maybe you've got one of those names that when you put your first initial and your last name, it says something wrong. Oh, yeah. You know, like your Andrew Null. Oh, we nearly said it.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Nearly said it. Andrew Null. I mean, you get this with Vaughn. You're constantly. Just last night I texted someone and they text message back thanks and they spelt it V-A-U-N-G-H

V-A-U-N-G-H V-A-U-N-G-H So it's got that N-G-H, almost that South East Asian sound with the V-A-U-N-G-H Quite Thai. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Which I'm not against.

It's hot at the moment with White Lotus and that. Yeah. Okay, well, 0800-DARLS-IT-EM, we want to take your calls now. Text through 9696. Does your name cause you a bit of trouble? Oh, sorry. God, women constantly talking over men. It's a real problem we face most of our life, isn't it, Vaughn?

It's an epidemic. Yeah. Talking over men. It's a real problem we face most of our life, isn't it, Vaughan? It's an epidemic. Yeah. Now, we are currently wanting to know if your name gets you, causes you a little bit of trouble in your life. Because there are a few people with the last name Null, as in null and void. And it gives them problems with forms and software online.

Databases. Databases. A real pain. We talked about my friend KO, the spelling of which people just can't understand. And it causes a lot of grief. Kerry, good morning. Hi, how you doing?

Kerry, that's a pretty usual name, isn't it? It is a pretty usual name, yeah, but it's got an unusual spelling. My mum's of Welsh origin, and she actually originally wanted to call me heroine you gotta have the hat to win oh okay oh wow okay wow my dad was like i can't say that i can't spell it yeah he doesn't speak welsh yeah uh so she shortened it down and tried to call me carrie but it's uh spelt c-e-r-i oh yeah so what do people say siri or cherry cherry cherry the rye um pretty much anything you can possibly think of. Oh, wow. And so most days, would you be explaining this to someone?

I've given up, actually. I'm in my late 30s now. And when I was younger, for sure, all the time. But now I'm just like, whatever, just call me. Yeah, whatever you want. Or I would just write it down, K-E-R-Y. What happens when you get older? You just stop caring about just live phone.

You actually sort of tap out quite early. Yeah. That's really it. Well, thank you, Sarai. I just, I put a K in it, you know. That's what I would do. Yeah. Brilliant.

Thank you, Kerry. Thank you, Sarai. Josh. Good morning, Josh. Hiya. This is your brother-in-law that has an interesting name or has trouble with it quite a bit. Yeah, so he went to Auckland Uni and the way they sort out the emails, it's the first letter of your first name and the first three of your last. Okay, what's his... His cell's SHIT.

Oh! Talking like a shit at Auckland University. And Auckland's emails got flagged as spam to his professors. And then he got his PhD, so now he's doctor shit. Yeah. That's so good. But you would never think about, like, you'd think when you're naming a kid, you'd think about teasing, but you would never think about email shortening. Email compressions.

Yeah, Samuel Hitchcock. Yeah. Wow. And they all do it differently, so you don't even know what they. Email compressions. Yeah, Samuel Hitchcock. Yeah. Wow. And they all do it differently, so you don't even know what they're going to do. Yeah, exactly. How many weeks, mate? Oh, no.

Can you send our love and our regards to Professor Shit? I shall. I will. Yeah, do pass on our regards. Thank you, Josh. Some messages in. My partner's name is Bo, B-E-A-U. Oh, yeah.

He gets B-O, B-O-W-L, bowl. Yeah. I'm going to write bowl. He's even had pho, P-H-O. Oh, yeah. Oh, pho. And B-U-E, which I thought was just, I've just heard Bo, and just been like, I don't know.

B-U. Give it a go. Someone said it's on the low end of things, but just a shout out to everyone who's got two first names. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Like if your last name's Scott and your first name's Thomas and you're Thomas Scott, those are two first names.

Yeah, it is. My name is Anika Margaritas. Now, what a lovely name. But my middle names are Johanna Margarit. So my name is Anika Johanna Margarit Margaritas, which is also an alcoholic drink. So people think I'm taking the piss when I say Margaritis. Classic or strawberry or lime?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Frozen. Frozen. I'm going classic frozen with a salt rim. Frozen coconut. My cousin's name is Angela Nola. Her school login was anal. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley.

Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Guys, New Zealand has spent $6 billion online shopping last year. Is that overseas or in New Zealand? It's online shopping reaching over $6 billion in 2024. It was a 5% increase. It includes domestic and overseas. $6 billion. But the fastest growth is in offshore purchases.

With Teemu. Yes. Teemu experience. I'm on the Teemu checkout as we speak. But I have been trying to check out these things for a long time. Didn't you say you logged in this morning and... My cart from November. Remember when I was buying us those meat presses

and I needed a little face cream dispenser? That's been in my cart from November. Remember when I was buying us those meat presses and I needed a little face cream dispenser? That's been in my cart since November. It's nearly March. And they kept it in there. I just held it onto it. So it experienced a 33% increase in purchases compared to 2023. So much of the stuff on there is crap. It's shit.

But every now and then. There are some things on there that, you know, if you went into a shop, it's more or less the same thing. Yeah. Because they got it from China, and all you're doing is getting it directly from China. But my major issue with this is always the upsell on some little plasticky piece of nothing that's going to break,

that costs next to nothing, that gets here for free. Do you want a Borat car freshener or not, mate? Because I've added it to the cart. Of course I do. Just to fill it at you, exactly. As long as it smells like marijuana or I don't know, what is a Borat car freshener or not, mate? Because I've added it to the cart. Of course I do. Just to fill it at you, exactly. As long as it smells like marijuana or I don't know. What does a Borat air freshener smell like?

I don't know. I have no idea. Stinky buds. But that's my problem with it is the upsell on all this junk we don't need and the plastic stuff that breaks and is just forever in our oceans. But, man, we must be spending a lot. Well, we are. $6 billion. Forever in our oceans. But man, we must be spending a lot. Well, we are. Six billion dollars. It says local retailers are facing the challenges of more people opting for offshore shopping,

which of course affects the money being in New Zealand. Oh no, I shop locally as well. Oh, you're doing both. I do all thinking. So I shop locally. I shop New Zealand made. I shop internationally. I shop online, in person.

You had a new Karen Walker cat t-shirt I did that's shopping local isn't it yeah that's shopping local was that gifted was that hashtag gifted oh okay

was that hashtag gifted yeah genuinely hashtag gifted not the kind of hashtag gifted I tell Aaron about sometimes right I've got a hashtag gifted this he's like oh my god

I love this jacket I'm like oh my god they gave it to me hashtag hashtag gifted hashtag gifted he's like aren't't your lucky gal. Technically you are misleading someone there with that

hashtag, so you might need to just sneak in a hashtag G1 FTED. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As to not confuse people. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or, you know, be caught up in some sort of ASA situation. God, that's a lot of money we're spending as a nation. Yeah. But do we want these

meat pressers and Borat air fresheners? Yes. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. We want to talk about when you've embarrassed your nation. Maybe you as a Kiwi have been overseas and you've done something that's led a little bit of shame back to home. Or maybe you've seen, and we will also be taking stories off, of when you've seen New Zealanders embarrassing New Zealand overseas.

We get a bit carried away sometimes, don't we? What's the pub crawl? Waitangi Day. Waitangi Day in London. Oh, those costumes, though, are top notch. Top notch. But do we need the haka when you're that slaughtered? Yeah.

Because we're probably not doing it right. Nah. Maybe there was like a cultural misunderstanding or an accent misunderstanding. Because some of the things we say, they sound like swear words, but they're not. Yeah. Well, footage has emerged. This is what got us onto talking about this.

A Japanese man had his GoPro recording when he stormed up to a woman having a beer and a cigarette on a smoke-free ski resort in Japan. A lot of them are. No smoking on the fields, at the cafes. When you're on the mountain, it's no smoking. It's a way of reducing the. Yeah. A lot of them are. No smoking on the fields, at the cafes. When you're on the mountain, it's no smoking. It's a way of reducing

the waste from cigarettes, like the cigarette butts. Of course. We all know a smoker, or now they probably vape, but when they smoked, they all said, I don't litter,

I'm not one of those people, and then right in front of you goes, and flicks it, or stomps on it and walks away from it, and it drives me crazy. But anyway,

he approaches this woman in an effort to get her to stop smoking. Sorry? What sorry? I beg your pardon? I don't know. It's so problematic. Hey, don't yell at her. What?

Don't yell at her. She didn't know. Didn't know? No. It's her first time. You're going to touch her. I'll knock you out. You don't touch a woman like that.

It goes on for quite a while, but they're like two of the most bogan Australians you can imagine. So great. Yeah, you're not the sort of people you'd see and expect them to tell you how they've just been on a ski trip to Japan. No. They look like they would do two weeks in Bali. Yeah, and they look like they'd go on holiday.

He'd go out on a fishing charter and she'd go to the mall. This is actually our own prejudice, isn't it? Yeah, isn't it? Yeah. Isn't it? So we want to know this morning, 0800-DARLS-AT-M-9696. When have you embarrassed our fine country overseas or witnessed someone embarrassing our fine country overseas?

Or Australians. We'll take some Australian calls if you see some Australians. Well, I mean, we're quite often confused, aren't we? Yeah. We're tarred with the same brush. Also, you get to Bali and you do see some Australians. Okay, they are way worse than us in Bali. They're way worse than us in Bali.

There's something about Bali that sets them loose. Does it count when I was in Turkey and I saw a guy and he had a big Like a huge Maori design tattoo And me and my mum Went up to him And were like Kia ora bro

And he was like Hello What And we were like Oh we just saw your Maori thing And he was like Oh I just thought It was pretty

And we were like Oh He Robbie Williams Did that He did No I don't think that's I don't think that's bad That's on the

We'll pass that to England. Yeah, that's England embarrassing themselves. Okay, 0800-DARLS.M, give us a call. Have you embarrassed the nation? Australians, they do this well. And by well, I mean terribly. And by terribly, I mean very prolifically. We're also to blame sometimes.

I know, yeah, because so many people are messaging in when they were overseas. Somebody said, I'm going to give this guy a shout out. Where's his name? When our mate Bruce used to embarrass us all the time in London, we'd always apologise on his behalf as a couple of us dragged him away saying, sorry, he's Australian. So it was a buck past someone else. He wanted to embarrass my nation overseas.

I'll always pretend I'm Australian when, you know, it comes time to apologise. Sorry, Bart. Sorry, Bart. Oh, sorry, Bart. Some other messages in. I had an argument in KFC in Nottingham, England. Oh, we've been there. Lovely. Lovely.

You must go to the... And we met the Sheriff of Nottingham. And then you go underground, under the Westfield, there's a lime cave. Oh. Limes? Yeah. How do they grow under there's a lime cave. Oh. Yeah. Limes. Yeah. No, limestone. How do they grow under there without sunlight? No limestone.

More of a winter fruit. Yeah, more of a winter fruit. And I had an argument in the KFC because I was saying, no, I don't want these skinny ones. Give me the fat KFC fries. And she said, these are the fries. And I said, no, no, no, you're doing it wrong. Where are the fat fries that they've got back home?

And she said, piss off back to your own country if you want your fat KFC fries. But they're trying to give her shoestring. Apparently, in Nottingham in England, they do shoestring fries. They do the fat ones too. No, KFC is a slightly fatter fry, but it's not a thick cut.

Fatter than a McDonald's fry. Yeah. It's the fattest of the... But they're not fat. It's the fattest of the takeaway fries. It's the best fry, in my opinion. They're not shoestrings. No, no, no, I know, but in KFC in Nottingham,

it was skinny shoestrings. Okay. I want the fat KFC fries. Maybe they ran out of the fat ones. No, apparently they just never do the fat ones. Maybe they actually, like, pop down to the shop, you know? Go home.

Yeah. Go home and get them when you get back there. Well, that has brought shame to the nation. I want the fat KFC fries. My ex-boyfriend was very insistent to a British shopkeeper that L&P was an

international drink and he should have it. It's not. It's not. And had a bit of a steamed argument with him about it. Okay.

And I was just like, I am so sorry. Were they boozed? A lot of these stories, people are boozed. Yeah. A lot of booze involved. Yeah. Dobby, booze involved. Yeah.

Dobby, myself, and when I lived in London last year, I hosted a Kiwiana-themed dinner party. Our friend group did this for each of their own home countries. Oh, that's great. I embarrassed the country when I couldn't make a pavlova. Oh, yeah. Okay. Why bother?

It's a difficult dessert to tackle. But, you know, then if the Australians have a dinner party and now the pavlova, they claim it. They can claim it. So it's very important we remain consistent. I both promoted us and embarrassed us at the same time. Okay. I was in Sydney Airport taking a hungover

talk, taking a hungover chick, talking to her about crate day. And she thought we were on another level. An old lady across the table commented how bloody stupid New Zealanders are and how Kiwis need to grow up. I was actually on a flight home specifically for Crater. Oh, yeah.

That's, yeah. Shame to the nation. I got pretty heated in Macedonia. I was there for the first time and stopped a border patrol in a tiny airport because they thought that my passport was fake and New Zealand was a made-up country. How do you argue with that? I had them Google it on a computer

to prove that there was a country. I was there for 10 hours while they investigated it. Yeah. What is this place? I don't think that's shame to the nation. No. What sounds more made up? Macedonia. Or New Zealand. Yeah. Worked in rental cars. A customer from

the US came after a cyclone, asked the norm, I asked the norm, what are you here for, business or pleasure? He said, I'm here for disaster tourism. I was like, what the F? And he said, yeah, I see all the damage and stuff. I was gobsmacked. We had friends leave home and lives and people thought

it was a good idea to do disaster tourism. I put his entire country to shame right then, but now I think about the fact he would have gone home and been like, they're not very friendly. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But that is wild.

Yeah, that's fair. Go on. Went to Canada for work for a ski resort, walked into a... I haven't read the end of this. I just started with Canada. I'm like, what a friendly, lovable nation. Or as I like to call it, North North America.

Yeah. It is 820. That's all I'm going to say. Carry on. I need to read it, but you'll come across it when you get to it. Yeah, I've come across it now, and I'm not quite sure how I'm going to deal with it. Okay. Worked in Canada to work for a ski resort.

Worked at a hostel common room, and three young Australian women walked in, and one of them said, my nether regions are rubbing like two bits of dry toast And everyone in the common room stopped and looked And was just like I beg your pardon That's one way to describe it That's bringing a bit of shame to Australia

A little bit of shame to Aussie Two bits of dry toast And yet every woman listening can feel it Yeah, I can kind of imagine it. We can feel it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. I just had a finger of peanut butter.

We all had a little bit of peanut butter. I'm a little bit salivary. Yeah, we all had a bit of peanut butter. Just going to need a slight. Sorry. That's really good. That's really good though. Yeah, quick.

Quick mention, pick salt and pepper peanut butter. They've got a salt and pepper. You can really taste it. Your mum's going to find that and mum's not going to be able to handle that. Your mum's not going to like that. At all. Too spicy.

That'd make a good satay sauce. It would. Anyhow, it's insults week at Fact of the Day. We're looking into the insults, the origins of insults. Man, it's really made me salivary. The origins of insults, and today we're going to the origins of the your mama insults. Yay. Do you know where we can squarely find the big ones?

Where? The Bible. The Bible's full of your mama jokes. No, it's not. It is 1 Samuel 20, 30. Your mama so fat. Thou son of the perverse rebellious woman.

That's basically saying your mum's a rebellious pervert. Wow. Thou'st a son of the perverse rebellious woman. That's the first recorded history. It's not the first recorded one, but it's the most popularly published barbs from

the Bible are the your mama jokes. Of your mother is by the one who has intercourse with her. What slash who is it? Saying your mother's a promiscuous woman. Don't you talk about Patsy like that. I would never, but it's in the Bible. It's in the Bible. So they say there's various insults to people's mothers throughout the Bible.

And it's kind of like from there throughout time, it's just kind of evolved that it's got worse and worse. And now it's straight up your mama. Your mama's so fat. That she is, her BMI's high. Your mama's so fat that when she went to the beach, a whale swam up and sung, we are family. That's terrible.

That was the first one that came up. That's the first one that comes up on Google. You're kidding me. Google, that's the best Google can do. I mean, a lot of them are having to do with the weight. And that's not always what we support as a show. But what can you insult people on

nowadays? Your mum is so skinny when she swallowed a meatball, everyone thought she was pregnant. Now, that's mean because the mother might have health issues that lead to not being able to put on weight. What about your mum is so ugly even Hello Kitty said goodbye? Well, that's actually just... She can't help that. She doesn't have the money to rectify the situation

with any sort of cosmetic surgery. And why should she? Because Dad finds her beautiful. Your mum is so stupid she puts her M&Ms in alphabetical order. Well, it's easy. That's a sensible thing. Okay, that's a good one. It's easy to put them in alphabetical order.

But we're allowed to laugh. It's in the Bible. Bingo. You found the loophole. You're allowed to laugh. I found the religious loophole. Yeah. So, today's fact of the day is the...

Got another one? Your mum is so poor, she has ducks through bread at her. It sounded like a duck. The laughing sounded like a duck. These are terrible. It's not very nice. Goodness. She's really struggling.

And someone's making fun of her, Rebecca. All these things she can't help. Your mum is so poor. Your mum is so poor. When I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked what she's doing. She said moving. That's terrible.

That's terrible. That's poverty shaming, actually. Yeah, that's poverty shaming. None of these are suitable for 2025. You get cancelled for all of these in the modern time. Your mum is so dumb that Rebecca Black taught her the days of the week. It's good.

That's a good one. All she's into on a Friday. That's how dumb your mum is. She can only remember one day of the week. Yeah. Oh, that's sad. Poor woman. I feel like she needs help not to be mocked relentlessly

by people she's trying to do a support. Well, you did start this, Vaughn. Oh, no, the Bible started it. Okay, yeah. Your mum is so ugly, Bob the Builder said, I can't fix that. But Bob the Builder's not a cosmetic surgeon. He builds things.

Mostly takes care of sort of construction work. Yeah, but when he's asked, can you fix this? He says, yes, we can, so. Yeah, but he couldn't fix anything. He's not a doctor. Your mum is so skinny, her nipples touch. Anyway, let's, we're done. That's a weird one.

I know. How skinny is she that her nipples would touch? Anyway, let's get out of this. They're all terrible. Come on, we're done. That's a weird one. I know. Just thinking about it. How's it going to be that nipples will touch? Anyway, let's get out of this. They're all terrible. Come on, these are terrible. Stand by this. You need to grow up

and read more Bible where you would find some of the original Yo Mama jokes. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Hey, I do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do and Hayley. Aaron's away at the moment and I'm home by myself and I, you know, I have been given the word of like not really to touch too much while he's

away. Like what? I don't like tootoo with because there's still things to do and there's bits and bobs that need like moving around but not to like do anything because I'll probably break things. Yeah. And I was like, mate, calm down, you know. Yeah, like you're not a teenager. Yeah, I don't like thrash about this house. So yesterday I was like, mate, calm down, you know. Yeah, like you're not a teenager.

Yeah, I don't like thrash about this house. So yesterday I was thrashing about in the spare room and I knocked a lamp and I think we talked about these lamps maybe last year but they were expensive. They're quite odd lamps. Are you going to describe them? Yeah, they're... Like a head.

They're heads. There's a girl head and a boy head. They're like busts. And the light bulb is them blowing a balloon. I thought it was bubble gum. Bubble gum, sorry. Yeah. Blowing bubble gum.

Because when I saw these in the spare room when I was around at your house last, I was like, they're very cool, but they're not something I would put next to a bed. Yeah, because the light bulb sticks out of the mouth and just sort of hangs out. And it's right kind of just hovering above table height. Yeah. So if you've got a glass of water or you're reaching in the middle of the night or you get up in the middle of the night, you're going to knock that. Because, you know, you can just get lamps that just look normal.

Yeah. You can just get ones with, like, a nice heavy base that holds the lamp down and then at the top there'll be a light and then sometimes you put a shadow over the light or sometimes and like if you break it, you're just like, oh, no, and then you just go and get another one. Yeah, that's what I've got. What other purpose does it serve though? Just light.

Because this is like it's ah, it brings me joy, it makes me chuckle. I walk past and I'm like hee, hee, hee, blowing up bubbles, you silly lamps. Anyway, yesterday I went into this. That's why I watch TV. To get that sort of. To bring joy. Yeah, see, I just walk around my house looking for entertainment.

I read books and comics and stuff and I'm like, wow, that is pretty cool. And then I just put it down and it's not broken. No, I put it into my furniture and put lots of money into it. Anyway, they're also not from New Zealand. So, yesterday I was in the spare room and I broke the light bulb.

And the bits come off. I've made it worse. Like, I knocked the thing and then I was like, what's happened there? Then I tutu'd and then I snapped it more and then I was like, I wonder if I could fix this. Then I broke a filament thing. Like, I've, I'll say I could fix this. Then I broke a filament thing. I'll say obliterated this light bulb. Can you put the bulb back in and just leave it there so he breaks it and thinks he...

No, because I've snapped the glass where it was attached to. Yeah, I've quite broken it. Oh, wow. That's like when you're in a flat and you go to change the light bulb and the light bulb comes off but the screw thing stays in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's kind of like that. Because it's so old?

It's so old. So I was like, okay, well, no big deal. You know, I don't get kind of thrown by these things. I was like, no big deal. I'll order a new light bulb. Yeah. But they have to come, I know this sounds pretentious,

but they have to come from Italy, darling. Oh, darling. These particular bubblegum bulbs come from Italy. What? Are you sure they're not on like 10 or while? No, I would have been down to minus 10 with that and I would have been like, what have you got? No, but it's pink and it's the right shape.

Erin comes home and the head is just like, there's a light bulb in it, a normal light bulb. Blowing one of those coiled. Could you have just bought two? How do you mean? Like, you can go down to minus 10 and buy two and switch them both out. There's a pink. They're like bubble gum.

Give them a little spray. No, no, no, no, no. Spray paint a light bulb? Heat resistant spray paint. I know, but like, this is the kind of stuff that Aaron's like, see, you're so, you know. Oh, right. So you need to fix this before he comes home. Otherwise, you're going to get an I told you so.

Yeah, a little bit. Okay. How much is it going to cost you to avoid an I told you so? Well, I've paid for the light bulbs and the shipping from Italy. Well, again, Italy. Wow. Is this something they teach you at private school? Must be.

Must be, eh? Watch how to order light bulbs from Italy. How to get things, how to own things that require Italian replacement parts. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This was like my whole seventh form. Yeah. Was like where to buy the greatest lamps and how to replace the parts.

And Italian marbles too. So basically the race against time is Aaron returning from his trap and the light bulbs getting to my house in Italy. And that's the race. Did you get express shipping? I got the only shipping that they gave me available which was like the cost of the light bulbs and I bought three

so that I could break a couple more in the future. Because inevitably they're such stupid flimsy lamps and this whole thing was a mistake but now I'm in too deep because I'm the one who wanted them. The race is on. The race is on. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley.

Animates also brings us Text of the Week. Yes. And show sponsor Animates. And I want to give that to the person who messaged him before because it gave us a good chortle that your mum is so ugly that your dad gets a morning wouldn't. Yeah. I thought it was a wonderful play on words

and significantly more advanced than most of the other Your Mama jokes. That was today's fact of the day, the history of insults. Yeah. Okay, I stand by that. Which we're loving better than calendar week. Oh, my God. Well, someone actually did text in as well, one you might have ignored,

your mama so stupid she liked calendar week. You guys are underestimating how popular calendar week is with her. I think you've overinflated it. People love calendar week. One week this week, calendar week is with that. I think you've overinflated it. People love calendar week. One week this week, calendar week, we'll be making its return with more amazing calendar facts.

Let us turn now from your mama jokes to a study that has been done about cheating. It's about cheating. People were asked where they put their modern relationship boundaries

and what constitutes cheating in the modern age. So many more options to cheat now. You think about the 1940s, you just had to straight up go down to the dance hall and find someone that wasn't your wife. Or you might have been stationed in France and you thought tomorrow you could die

because the Nazis are there. And you might hook up with a lovely young French lady. Yep. Or man. And then you don't die and the war ends and you're shipped home and you've got to go home. And then you just don't say anything. And you're like, I don't know. It's always burnt when I pee-peed.

Yeah. And Dr. Johnson has prescribed me cigarettes to solve the problem. 51% of people who were surveyed viewed harmless flirting as a betrayal. Oh, I love a little flirt. And 60% believed chatting with an ex crossed the line and they would consider it, you know, a road to cheating. If you had an amicable split with your ex and, like, you're not with them, who cares? It's not like you've still got a thing for them. Who cares?

And if there's kids, you've got to talk to these people. You've got to listen. Communication lines must stay open, people. 54% of people think that adult films should be banned in serious long-term relationships. Oh, for God's sake. They are needed more now than ever. Let them live a little.

It's no harm. 37% of respondents say they'd confront a partner hiding their phone password. Oh, yeah, that's funny. And believe that that is a sure sign that something's amiss. 49% of people would confront their partner about keeping pictures with an ex on their phone or on social media.

I'm not deleting. I don't like it when people break up with, like, a long-term partner and go into a... Unless it was, like, really bad. Yeah. I completely understand like it when people break up with, like, a long-term partner and go into a – unless it was, like, really bad. I can plainly understand you want to make a fresh start. No, but if it's not, like, really toxic, it's like, that's part of your life. It's there. But then if you're putting yourself out there,

the honeys are going to go through your timeline and see this girl and think about, who is that? Well, that's who I was with. Do you think if this is why Aaron says for me to never post him on Instagram, just to sort of save the admin on his butt? And he wants the honeys in a nice clean slate. He wants the honeys.

Maybe. But keeping them on your phone is a bit different. Yeah, I wouldn't unless you're like me and Hayley and you keep every single photo you've ever taken on your phone. Yeah, mine's on the phone. And pay an absolute fortune every month for cloud storage because it would fill up your phone otherwise. Where am I going to put it? I don't know, on a thumb drive or a hard drive.

No. You never know, sometimes I like to reminisce. Some people, a third of people are more patient with relationships with exes and co-workers will observe and make sure they can't see any untoward behaviour before intervening. Oh yeah.

But a lot of people believe any workplace antics, as it's described, could be cheating. We spoke a few weeks ago about work wives. Yeah. Some people were really against that, weren't they? Yeah, yeah. That was a real... You get one wife. Yeah. Yeah.

I don't know. I don't know how I became this way, but I just, none of it. What were your parents like with other people growing up? I don't know, really. When your mum was running out, Jay Hooker, was she a flirter to get the sale? I think both my parents are big flirts. Big flirts. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Big flirts. But they would never, you know, it would never be anything more. It's just a big flirt. Me and Aaron used to do that. We'd go out and be like, I've got to have a bloody mighty flirt tonight. Oh, tell me. Oh, this woman came up to me and said that.

You're not usual, eh? You're not usual. Oh, my goodness. Look at you go. Oh, so Aaron would also have a flirt. Yeah, he'd have a little flirt. I don't know. It makes me laugh.

Having a flirt. What, like? No, no, like a little flirt with you. Just like, that's just a bit of light fun. It's part of the joy of life no I don't want to flirt with you Just like That's just a bit of light fun It's part of the joy of life We don't cut off Let's like

With the adult content We don't stop feeling These things Once you're in a Relationship Well you're in Just the minority As 51% of people

Did view Harmless flirting As a betrayal Of the relationship A betrayal Oh my goodness Work on that Oh I just realised I did the whole show with my headphones on backwards.

Well, that means the show's backwards then, isn't it? We're going to have to play this in reverse. Well, should we speak in reverse and hopefully they'll work out the other way? Give us a review.