ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 29th May 2023

Episode Date: May 28, 2023

Top 6: Sir Edmund Hillary  Silly Little Poll!  Vaughans Cat  Hamilton!  Aaron was MIA  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fleshpawn and Hayley Big Pod. Thanks to McCafe. Great things are brewing, one cup at a time. Good morning, welcome to the show, Fleshpawn and Hayley. 70 years ago, Sir Ed made it to the top of Mount Everest. 70. 70.

Very impressive. Because when did he pass away? 2000s? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember seeing him at Auckland Airport once in the 2000s, and he was having trouble. 2008 he passed away. 2008, yeah.

I read his date of birth, 20th of July, 1919, and I thought it was 2019. I was like, there's no way he lived until 2019. Yeah, 2008 at age 88. Since then how many people have done it? Because it's still

like a hard climb. Like you need all the gear. Like what? Someone died last week doing it? Yeah, it's still so dangerous. Yeah.

Let's not do it. I know we were planning maybe in a couple of weeks to like have a go. Yeah, sure. I think let's just like rethink that and maybe do Tom and Gretel or something. I don't think trying Everest after you're two months off at the gym is... No, but she's carbo-loading.

She's carbo-loading. Yeah, that's why I'm strength building. Okay, yeah, right. By laying off lifting weights and dieting. Yeah. So I'll be ready So all that energy will be burnt on the ascent. Yeah, it's almost like a hibernation prep.

Like I'm really stocking up in order for us to get to the mountain. Yeah, good, good. You guys are going to regret not joining me. I've climbed the mount. It's like that. Yeah, it's like that, but times like 40? Yeah, and I didn't need to use the oxygen.

Right. When I climbed Mount Maunganui. Good lungs. Yeah, I know, great lungs on the guy. I used to live in Mount Vic, so that's... You've lived on a mountain? I lived on a mountain. Yeah, yeah.

So on Wikipedia, it says, as of July 2022, so this stats a little bit out, there have been approximately 11,300 summit ascents by 6,098 people. Not that many. So a lot of people have gone twice. 6,000 people and 11,000 ascents. Would they be Sherpas? The Sherpas would have been multiple times, I reckon.

The Sherpas would have been multiple times. Yeah, okay. So a lot of people probably go once and Sherpas just The Sherpas would have been multiple times, I reckon. The Sherpas would have been multiple times. Yeah, okay. So a lot of people probably go once, and Sherpas just go every other day. So in 70 years, only 6,000 people have done it. Yeah. That's insane, isn't it? Yeah. What a feat.

And he did it without, he had oxygen? No. No oxygen? No. Just Weet-Bix? I don't think so. Lots of Weet-Bix. Right.

He was a Kiwi kid. Did Hillary use oxygen? After all, the first ascent was largely measured. Oh, so they did use some bottled oxygen. They did use. Okay. Yeah. God, he fought in World War II as well.

Yep. Did he? It was a man. Oh, no. A bloody great. No. He applied for the Royal New Zealand Air Force, but quickly withdrew the application,

later writing that he was harassed for his religious beliefs. Oh, so he was a bit of a god-botherer. Oh, no. And then later, a Japanese threat in the Pacific and the arrival of... He was sent to Fiji and the Solomon Islands, where he was badly burned in an accident. He was in the army for a bit in the Air Force.

Goodness. And now he's on the $5 note. Wow, 70 years today. Fantastic. Bit of New Zealand history for you to start the show. Oh, yeah, we should do more history,

I think, on the show in general. Sreeman and Hillary's religion was a mix of combination, a combination of Christianity, psychology, health and fitness. That's what Google has just told me.

That's your religion. He was a crossfitter. He was an F45. Oh, he was, yes. If he was alive That's what Google has just told me. That's your religion. He was a CrossFitter. He was an F45er. Oh, he was, yes. If he was alive today, he'd be an F45er. He would 100% have his own F45 franchise. He 100% would. Oh, dude, yeah.

Sir Ed had big CrossFit energy. That's my man. Next on the show, AI. We talk about AI a lot. You've got the, have you downloaded the app? The app is available now on iPhones. I may have paid for a year's membership, so we've got to use this thing

because I'm claiming it as a business expense. Are you kidding me? You paid. How much is the... You're on the new version of the really good one. I got the $70 for the whole year. Oh, yeah. That's not too bad.

I think it's going to start charging soon. It can tell me dirty stories. Oh, my God. Sexy. I was going to say do one now, but we want to check it. Can you cater it, though? Like if you're watching a little bit of sexy stuff, you can put in your keywords. Yes.

There's different categories. This is under the naughty kit. There's stories, R18, F buddy, which I think means friend buddy. Yes. Dominator, mummy, subby, or daddy. I don't like that. Neither. Not my categories.

Let's just say that. Not my categories. AI is being used for bad because AI and hackers are coming after your password. And it turns out with AI, it's not that hard for them to crack into your email. Oh, no. So there's some things we need to do with AI and hackers to make your password safer. We'll delve into this next. Lewis Capaldi, ZM.

Play. ZM. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. AI, every day there are new AI stories. You've just downloaded the new app. Yep. What do you want it to do? It'll do this break for us. It'll do the whole break for us.

We'll just go make a coffee. I don't know. Well, we don't want it to do our job, do we, though? I accidentally clicked Dominator. I don't know. Well, we don't want it to do our job, do we, though? I accidentally clicked Dominator. I don't want to read it. It can teach you language, a homework tutor, a science tutor. A nerdy friend. A nerdy friend.

Why is that under the thing? Poems for school. I didn't even think about that. You could use it for tutoring and learning. Yeah. My mind just goes to all tutoring and learning. Yeah. Okay. My mind just goes to all the bad ways. Language.

Can you help me learn Spanish? Sí. I've clicked it. It said... It's not super fast. Right. Por se puesta. Which means, of course, let's get started.

Do you have any prior experience with Spanish knowledge? I watched Dora the Explorer. What's it started. Do you have any prior experience with Spanish knowledge? I watched Dora the Explorer. What's it going to tell you now? You laugh, but Circulo is Spanish for circle. That's a great starting point. Let's start. Okay, so then you can just go through. Right, and then so you can just chat with AI and it's going to help you learn.

Amazing. Yeah. Well, not everybody is using it to learn Spanish and for good. Hackers are using AI to crack into your email, your accounts, your banking. Oh, dear. So a news article here, an AI service cracked 51% of passwords in under a minute. Whoa. Whoa.

So like, I mean, even before AI,, even before AI, they're having programs that, you know, just run through passwords. Yeah, but if you get it wrong a few times, it locks you out. Yeah, I don't know. So I've always wanted that as well because you get, like, your iPhone, you put the wrong code in and it locks it for a certain amount of time. Yeah. I don't know if some websites do that, though.

Maybe they don't. Okay, that seems crazy. So, yeah, cyber criminals are using these and they're saying that basically you need to have a really strong password and have your two-factor set up on everything. Right. Yeah, I love a bit of two-factor.

Text authority? Yeah, it can be annoying. You've got to put in the code that they've emailed you. Or open the YouTube app, which I hate. Oh, yeah, that's another one. Gmail does that, doesn't it? Yeah. I love waking up to five emails from Facebook saying,

here is your Facebook password reset code. I'm like, someone's giving it a go. Yeah. So the common methods of how hackers get into your accounts. Brute forcing. It's a special program that enters different combinations of letters, numbers, and symbols faster than anyone can do by hand. And a hacker can try up to 100 billion possible passwords per second.

Oh, Jesus. So they're saying, and there are a lot of other ways they can try to get in, but they're saying if you want to make your password as secure as possible, you've got to use at least eight characters and they've got to be uppercase, lowercase. Like the weird generated ones they make you. Yeah, those are quite cool.

But if you use symbols and different kind of words or just random letters, that'll take 34,000 years to crack into. Whereas if it's just an eight-letter character with upper, lower case, that's 22 minutes to crack. Don't ever get mine. Mine's very clever. I use reverse psychology.

Just out of interest, what was your mother's maiden name? Robinson. So, you know, we've read out these lists of the most common passwords, QWERTY or password 123. Those are like at the start. Common phrases and passwords are at the start of every program that they use to crack into passwords. They just run through all like common phrases, dictionary words,

all of that. Yeah. It just cruises through. So yeah, you've got to just make them as long as random with letters, uppercase numbers as you can. And then make sure you write them all down. In a notepad. In a notepad. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But then you don't want to lose the notepad, so take a photo of it. Yeah, and upload the photo to your email. To the cloud. To the cloud. Yeah, have that in the cloud. Yeah, yeah, yeah, perfect. And email it to yourself. Yes.

And maybe to a friend as well. Or maybe just print it. You could print it out and put it on the fridge. That's also a great idea. Another great idea. Yeah. Life's too short for a long password. I've made a very long password.

You know when you reset a password and it says, oh, you can't use an old password So then I made a huge Sort of elaborate variation of one of my favourite Sort of go-to structures of my passwords And now every time I put it in I'm like, ugh, I resent this It's like writing a little novel

I just save all of mine In my iPhone in passwords Yeah, but it's so easy to crack The code of your phone, your PIN number, and then I'm in. Or I wait till you're asleep and I use facial recognition. And then I'm in. Yeah, but a hacker's not going to get into your home.

Hackers are going to go to school and start doing break-ins. Are they? For passwords. Well, we're all screwed then. Yeah, we are screwed. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. There was a massive survey done. This is in the United States of America.

And they asked people what their favourite type of cuisine is. Like takeouts. Yeah, like takeouts, basically. They limited it to Italian, which is not a massive takeout in New Zealand. Well, yeah, but pizza, you'd say that'd be top five. Oh. You're just thinking of a creepy carbonara.

Yeah, I was thinking of a carbonara. Yeah, okay, so we'll say pizza. Italian, Japanese, Mexican, Thai, Indian, Chinese. Chinese. So those are pretty popular. That's a solid list. Yeah. Those are my go-tos.

I'm just trying to think they haven't missed anything off. Well, like American, basically, like burgers and stuff. Yeah, true. You know, but they didn't include that. And then they put it into the category of age or generation, and they've worked out your favorite foods of each generation. Okay. And then they put

a stat at the top that said gen pop and i was like what's generation pop and then i looked it up and that's a sort of um prison term general population yeah yeah yeah they haven't asked the prisoners you've never heard the term gen pop in all of your crime documentaries and podcasts? No, it's just that I read it as generation pop. Oh, generation pop. Right. As in like generation X, generation alpha. That's a cute name. Gen pop. Yeah. So

18 to 24, who's that? Oh yeah, that's your bloody, that's your Gen Z's. That's your favourite. Gen Z's. Oh my god. I can't believe I have to talk about them again. Gen Z were asked, and their favourite was Mexicano. Okay, we've got a Gen Z. Is that your favourite Mexican?

Is that your favourite cuisine? Yes. See? I love Mexican guacamole when I can afford an avo. It's a treat. Yeah, yeah. We used to do Mexican night at the flat, and it was just we would char up frozen corn with Mexican seasoning

and call it Mexican night. Wow. It was just corn. Was it corn on a cob or loose corn? Loose corn. How do you char up loose corn? It would fall through the barbecue grill. No, no, no, just on a pan.

In a pan. Did you do tacos? No, no. Nachos? No, no, no. Just Mexican night. It's just corn. What you just did. Just did corn with some seasoning.

I don't think that's Mexican night. That's just a really sad corn night. She sauteed corn. But it's my favourite. Your Mexican nights sound shit. I'm going to say it. But if we can get an avo, then there'll be guac. Wait, so you would put guac with a fried corn?

Yeah. Loose corn ears. We need to get you some cooking classes by the sound of it. Horrendous. Hook me up. Okay. Mexican Monday followed by weird poos Tuesday by the sound of things. Oh, there'd be some floaty.

Yeah. A lot of corn in there. A lot of corn. Yeah. So Gen Z, so their favorite went Mexican, then Italian, like pizzas as we've decided. Yeah. Then joint between Japanese, Chinese, then Thai, then Indian. This is so American because if you went British, New Zealand, Indian would be so far off.

I reckon Thai would be as well. Hell yeah. Do you know the interesting thing is, so the next one, the millennials, exactly the same, like slightly different stats, but that order. Yep. Mexican, Italian, Japanese, Chinese, equal, Thai, Indian. Then the next generation, that's your... Gen X.

Gen X. Yep. Exactly the same. We're loving our Mexican. Yum. Just behind, though, is Italian for that one. The only generation that was the bloody boomers who loved an Italian way more. Yeah, my mum wouldn't do, because most of those other cuisines are quite heavy on coriander.

Or chilli. And spice. Yeah, and she's anti. Yeah. But would she do an italian like a pasta or a pizza pasta yeah right okay she'd do a pasta a takeaway pasta oh well you'd go to a go to a restaurant yeah for a quick sit down i don't think i can't even remember the last time i went to a restaurant and ordered pasta i I always get upset with people. Yeah, because there's just more exciting things, eh?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's way more exciting things. Also, I feel like we were, in student days, brought up on those packet pasta things. You know, where you just add a bit of milk and a bit of butter. What were those family packs of? San Remo. Yeah, they weren't afraid of that, a bit of milk and butter. Yeah, that got you your fresher 10, didn't afraid of that. A bit of milk and butter. Yeah.

God, that got you your fresh attendant, didn't it? Your fresh advice. Those were good. Oh, now I want one. Would it be weird if I got one? It's been literally over a decade since I've had a bag of San Remo. I think the last time I had was when I was tramping and stayed in a hut overnight. And I was like, well, that's easy.

Yeah. And you're totally carbo loaded for the next day. Always write off a lot of things. Oh my God. When I come back into studio, I'm going to bring some San Remo packets. It's got to be a mac and cheese. It's got to be macaroni elbows too. Oh yeah, absolutely.

I always got the bacon one with the long strips. Yeah, I got the bacon with the skinny strips. Yeah, that's what we're doing. It must be nice. Yeah, it's good stuff. Must be nice. My parents lent me the bacon with the skinny strips. Yeah, that's what we're doing. It must be. What's that? Yeah. It's good stuff. Must be nice. My parents lent me a bit of money every week.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley from the bustling ZM Think Tank. This is the Top Six. Hello. Today's Top Six. It's 29th of May, 1953. 70 years ago, Srim and Hilary, Tenzing Norgay reached the top of Mount Everest. What was that, sorry?

I said, take me back. Take me back 70 years. I just searched Mount Everest news, and it said climbers celebrate the 70th anniversary, and then there's the stories of people who died on it recently. So it's still a lot of people. And the bodies just stay there too. Yeah. And because it's so cold and so dry, they don't decompose

very quickly. There's still people there in really unfashionable climbing suits. Yeah, through the ages. Fluoroping. And their 80s North Face gear. Embarrassing. Oh my god, it's so bright. Garish.

The, what was I going to say about one of them? They use as landmarks. Yeah, like turn left at the dead Swede. Seriously? Yeah, two steps past the dead Australian. There's Green Boots. Now, Green Boots is a very famous death landmark. Green Boots was 28 years old when he died in 1996 on the mountain.

And now you're a landmark. Yep. Oh my God, I've just looked up photos, which is pretty grim. But yeah, Green Boots. What are they just sticking out of the snow? Found in a cave at an altitude of 8,500 metres, it has become one of the landmarks

for those who head up the mountain from the northern side. He's just lying on his side like he's having a little nap. Oh my God. He's been there for a while. And then there was a big earthquake a couple of years, a few years ago, and that completely changed the route as well.

Oh, okay. Because of some slips and stuff. It was 70 years ago today. If you can remember that, you probably accidentally listened to the show because you can't quite figure out how to change it back. But good morning. Good morning to you. What's the But good morning. Good morning to you. What's the frequency for gold?

Good morning to you. You've accidentally hit the AM FM button. Yeah. Hang in there. Press it again and it will go back to AM. No, stick around. This is a show for everyone. Here we laugh out louder every morning

and just bring some joy and light to your day. Today's top six is the top six things to know about Serebman Hillary on the 70th anniversary of the summoning of Everest. Number six on the list, he was six foot two. He is a tall man. He's a tall man. He was always shorter than his buddies,

but then he was the guy at high school that all of a sudden came back over summer and had grown. So he was six foot two or approximately one and a half sherpas tall. Yeah, right. Number five on the list, you may know that Sridharman Hillary

was a apiarist, a beekeeper. But did you know over the summer months he would sometimes get up to 100 bee sings a day? He didn't have the suits back then, did they?

But they had so many beehives. Him and his brother and his father would go around and sort them out and they had so many beehives but I guess just not enough suits for everybody.

That or because he grew so tall, the bees were getting up his legs and the end of his sleeves because he got so tall so quick. Number four on the list of the top six things to know about Sir Edmund Hillary on this, the 70th anniversary of the Settling of Everest. His Hillary has two L's in it. Often you'll see people use the L, Hillary Barry. Hillary Barry's one L. She's a one L. She's a one L.

That's a female first name. Yeah. Hillary's surname generally has two. Number three on the list of the top six things to know about Sir Edmund Hillary on the 70th anniversary of the summoning of Everest. And this is my favorite Sir Ed fact. After summoning Everest, he became very popular in Nepal. Like, yeah. Famous. fact. After summoning Everest, he became very popular in Nepal. Put in

landing airstrips in a hospital and just like a legendary fellow. But he also went back and led a party that explored the Himalayas for the Yeti. Actual search party. Yeah. Worth a look. It's worth a look. The

snowman. Yeah. Number two on the list of worth a look. The snowman, yeah. Number two on the list of the top six things to know about Sir Ed. This will get the old boys going. He voted Labour. In 1975 he supported the Labour Party as a member of the Citizens for Rowling campaign. Citizens for Rowling

to Uluru. Not Rowling Rowling's last name. Keith Rowling. Was it Keith Rowling? Bill? Bill Rowling. No, that's Bill Ralston. That's Bill Ralston. Outspoken media commentator.

And central Auckland resident. Okay. Interesting. And number one on the list of the top six things to know about Stread on the 70th anniversary of the Simming of Everest. He had his own coat of arms. And now I want one. It is a crest.

It is a Kiwi azure grasping a ice axe. Yeah. So on the top of it is a Kiwi standing up and on one of it the Kiwi's

cool. It's holding an ice axe. Wait, sorry. The Kiwi is holding an ice axe. Yes. And it's talon. Claw.

Foot. Leg. Yeah. Holding an ice axe. That's cute, but I don't think a Kiwi could use an Claw. Foot. Leg. Yeah, look, I mean, that's cute, but I don't think a Kiwi could use an axe. Wildly unrealistic. Then there's the shield underneath it. And on the shield, there's three Nepalese prayer wheels. And then on either side of that shield is an emperor penguin.

Because, of course, he did some massive Antarctic journeys as well. Oh, he did, yeah, of course, yeah. His motto's on there, nothing venture, nothing win. Terrible English, but you get the idea. Nothing ventured, nothing win. No, no, not nothing ventured, nothing venture, nothing win. Is that some kind of Latin-y

thing, English-y Latin? Nah, because it's English. It's just English. Nothing venture, nothing win. Nothing ventured, nothing won. Yeah, maybe we could just get a vivid and change that on the shield. A little bit of a change. And then his order is written underneath.

The Order of New Zealand, the Order of the Garda, and the Order of the British Empire. Lovely. What a man. 70 years since he summoned at Everest. That's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. United Video play it one more time now

except in Invercargill United Video Invercargill I can't believe they were still going yeah it's shutting down it's done

after 40 years it's shutting down. It's done. After 40 years, it is shutting down. Is this the last one left in New Zealand? No, there's still others. I was just trying to actually find some. So this was in 2022. Morrinsville still has United Video. Very proud to be from the place. That's because all the old mate farmers don't know about internet porn.

There's the famous... They're going to the UK's on VHS, mate. There's a famous Aro video in Wellington. That's never going anywhere. That's still there. So, Masterton and Invercargill were the two others mentioned in this 2022 article. So, I guess now with Invercargill, it's Masterton versus Morrinsville for who's got the staying power.

Wow. How do these places survive? Are you telling me that it's all just old mates? I was very surprised last time I was in Morrinsville. I was looking at it. It's downsized. It's not nearly as big as it used to be. But there were people coming in and out of it.

I mean, what's your lease on a store in Morrinsville? Like $20? It's like the first square of Monopoly. No, no, no. You buy it for $20. It's brown. So, you know, you can at least afford to in these smaller places, but you can never afford that kind of rent in a big city.

It's just nostalgia, I reckon, that reason people still go. Yeah. They're just going for a little bit of nostalgia. Or is it that, say, a place like Invercargill or Morrinsville, if you live out of town, there's no internet so you can't be streaming.

And you're certainly not paying for Starlink. No. It's ridiculous. I said to my parents, you should get it. Yeah. And they said, how much is it? And I said, it's $150 a month, which is expensive, I understand, but you're paying for an internet. But that's like $50 more than the city.

Yeah, and you're paying for it. And they were like, oof, no, no, no. Still have Sky. Get rid of Sky and just stream everything on. So this guy, I was just thinking they would have had a fascinating, this guy's owned it for 40 years. Yeah.

So he would have been there from the start to the end of home video, full stop. Yeah, yeah. He said one of his favorite memories was when he met Jean-Claude Van Damme during an event in Las Vegas. Okay. An event that I'm imagining, because this is the other thing, video stores used to have a real pull, a real say in what was like a popular movie.

Yeah. And that was when they made a lot more money when they were released for home video and DVD. And so if they had 100 copies of it, you'd walk in, you're like, that must be good. There's 100 copies of it. Yeah, 100%. And so you get it. So they would obviously take, they would get little work perks. To go away.

And so what this last one in Invercargill's closing down. Yep, Invercargill's United video is closing down. Now, I don't know about Civic video. Is that still going? I don't know if there is still a Civic video. What were the other? I can do a quick Civic video NZ. Amalgamated?

Civic video defunct as of February 28, 2023. That's on the official Civic Video. Oh. That's just, yeah. Do you remember when they all started shutting down and then all the places were doing, like, big sales? And you'd get, like, a DVD for 50 cents. Yeah, and then, like, it would be in your collection,

but it would still have all the stickers on it. Yeah. And it would be a bit grimy because of everybody else's manky home. Yeah. And like a thick lock case. Yeah. And if they didn't just go sticker over, it would have always annoyed me when it went from a $7 overnight to a $5 for a week if the sticker wasn't perfectly on top of the

old sticker. Oh, yeah. You had an array of stickers. Yuck. Well, it's a sad day. It's a sad day. It's a sad day. Yeah.

The last Civic video is shut in January 2022 in Tauranga. So Civic video gone. Yeah, right. United video, Morrinsville and Macedon. Hanging in there. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Fletch Vaughan and Hayley.

Silly little po. Silly little po. It is so silly, silly, silly, that silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Today's silly little pole. QR code menus. Scan them on the table. You're at table 12. What do you want?

Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. Order, and out it comes. Scan them on the table. You're at table 12. What do you want? Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. Order. And out it comes. Love them. You love it because there's less interaction with people. Less interaction with people and you've got like they can't just be like it does my head in when you go to a restaurant and the wait staff

says, and what are we after? And I'm like, oh there's no pen and paper. And they're doing it in their head. And then they come back and they're like, just to clarify, if you had written it down, we would not be coming back just to clarify. I now have a document on my phone where I'm like, hey, where's the chicken wings? Because they never expect you to order much. As much as you do. expect you to order much as much

as you do i like to order a lot so how do people feel the results i hate them i hate them so much because you want to deal with people because i love people and like like our local which is not a busy busy busy place just got them and we go in and because we go there so much they're like do you guys want to use this we're like no come no. Come to my table, have a chat, sit down, talk to me. No, no, no, don't sit, don't linger, get in, get out. I hate when it's just the menu

that's QR code, but you can't order off there. Some places are like that. It's ridiculous. It's like, just print it out and put it on the table. That's ridiculous. Yeah, laminate it. You've got to look at it on your phone. Yeah. QR codes, do you like them? 30% of people said yes. 70% of people said no, I'm over it.

Yeah. Also, it's hard if you're... Because you can only have one order on a QR, right? Yes. And then, so if you wanted to share some fries, someone's got to buy the whole fries. Yeah. And that's the thing, you can't add for little, like, ask for little additions

or extras. Like we always get this like smoked fish thing and go like, can we have a little couple extra pieces of bread? That's like not on there. Oh, do they charge you for that?

Yeah. Oh, good. But it's not on the menu. You can decide for bread. No, you can't. When it's part of their main dish. Right. You're being a pain in the ass now.

This sounds like, this is why they got the QR codes. Brandon says, Customer service is so poor these days, I would rather not have it than have a bad experience. Plus, I'm not rushed when it's a QR code and everyone can buy their own and splitting it isn't an issue.

So he likes it. He's a QR code guy. Etiquette says, Mel has said, Etiquette says no phones at the table, please. Yes. Friend James has just messaged me saying a great hack when QR code doesn't

add the public holiday surcharge, though. Oh! Oh! We like QR now, don't we? Who was it that there was a mistake on the website of the bar and the drinks were like 50 cents?

Oh, perfect. Yeah, that was another. That's my sort of drink. Ivy says, I love seeing photos of the food and usually the QR code menus will have pictures of the food. Yes, that's true. So you can see what you're ordering. I love that.

I'm out for socialising. Phone is turned off. Who are all these people turning their phone off at the table? What if there's a national emergency? What if Gran trips on a rug and rolls down the stairs? You would have missed

the test notification last night. Exactly, you would have. Oh, yeah. Also, what if the conversation runs dry? You get bored. You need to Google things to talk about. Dead bodies on Everest. Oh, yeah.

We're still talking about that. I don't know. Screen boots. Renee says, it's a pain in the ass. Just put your menu on the freaking menu. Yeah. She wants the menu on the table. Michaela, they were great on our recent trip to Japan

because you could super easily translate the menu into English, but here in New Zealand, no, not a fan. Yes, I've actually used it travelling, and there was an English version version and it was quite good. That's handy. So many encounters with these overseas. Sucks when the restaurant doesn't offer Wi-Fi and the roaming data's run out

and you have no way of accessing the menu. I mean, that's on you to be totally fair. Yeah. Or ordering and you have to slink out in shame. Ash said, absolutely not. It took 10 minutes to get a beer after ordering off a QR. That's a problem with the staff, not the QR menu. Yeah.

I think your drink would have taken that long anyway by the sounds. And Danica, I would rather touch my own phone than have a grubby menu caked in mystery stain. Sounds like the pandemic's made you a bit germaphobe. They do need to wipe menus. Your menu needs to be wipeable. Heavily laminated and wipeable. Heavily laminated and wipeable. Heavily laminated and wipeable.

Well, there you go. QR codes, no. It's a no from 70%. It's a resounding no. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Saturday evening, late evening, very dark outside. I'm talking like 11 o'clock. Oh, wow.

Late, late Saturday night. That's very late for you to be awake. I was going to go check the possum traps. Why? Just do it in the morning. Because I could reset. If there's a dead one in there, I'll take it out, reset it. I could get another one.

I feel like I might need a little help here, Vaughan. I'm staying at this Airbnb quite near your house. A bit more bush. There'd be possums there because of the bush, yeah. Oh, my God. Last night it was like... Those aren't possums. On the roof.

Was that it talking or it running across the corridor? No, that's the sound of the feet on the roof. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought it was... I think what you've got is a peeping Tom. Yeah. Possums are dumb. And when they run on a roof, they're extra dumb

because they're like skiddly-diddly-dee because they've got claws for climbing, not claws for running along a corrugated iron roof. But I went out to check and I had a head torch on and I looked at the base of a tree where I saw some movement and I saw these big eyes. I was like, oh. But I realised they were quite bright, not like a possum's eyes,

and it turned out it was our cat. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Don't shoot it. Don't shoot it. No, no, no, no, no possum's eyes, and it turned out it was our cat. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Don't shoot it. Don't shoot it. No, no, no, no, no, no. I wasn't going to shoot it. I always check what you're going to.

But anyway, then I was like, oh, that's weird, and I moved my head slightly and looked at the actual tree. It was sitting beside, and there were more eyes. I was like, hmm? And that was an actual possum. And my cat was kind of talking to this possum. You know how cats chitter at birds? Yeah. I love, my cat does kind of talking to this possum. You know how cats chitter at birds? Yeah.

I love, my cat does that with flies. Yes, so does Raleigh. And bugs. Because why do cats do that? There's a reason, eh? Oh, yeah. What is it? Is it to confuse the bird or something?

Or to sound like the bird? And then the bird is like, oh, god. It's actually problematic that your cat's doing bird impressions. It's called cat chattering. Yeah. It's just a predatory instinct apparently. Really? Well, my Murray does it. Apparently it's a noise, chirping,

clicking or chattering. That's it. Yeah. It may also be a form of mimicry that's used as a hunting strategy. Yeah, that's what I think it is. Maybe confuse the birds or try to sound like them. The birds are like, is this a bird? I could be your friend. Is this a big, fat, hairy bird?

Hey, little birdie, why don't you come down here and we'll be friends. So wait, your cat is doing this to the possum. No, it was a bit more meowy than it was like. It was like. Just like, hey, what up? Possum didn't, it was a bit more meowy than it was like a... It was like... Just like, hey, what up? Possum didn't make any noise back. Was the cat just like, this looks like a cat, but it's not.

Yeah, whoa, cat. How are you getting up that tree so quick? Yeah. Hey, I like your bushy tail, cat. As if he's talking to this cat. What noise does a possum make? There's like... From what I know, they... Like hisses?

Yeah, they hiss. Like real... Like screaming. It's like a screaming, horrible noise. I've never seen one having a casual conversation. The only noise I've ever seen them make is when they're about to leave this earthly pine. I've never heard them just having a casual conversation with other possums. Yeah, that noise is somewhat disguised by the gunshot, though, isn't it?

So it's very hard to... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's good, though. Can you make us something? Can you make us some, like, slipper liners or something? Little shoe liners? My dad took my nephew possum shooting and shot it and skinned it then and there,

and then he took it to his other grandparents, and they did something to it, and I think they made, like, nipple warmers, didn't they? Little nipple warmers. Your mum's got those possum nipple warmers. Yeah, mum does love her possum. Especially this time of the year. She's very prone to the cold.

Well, you know, under the overalls in the milking shed, it's cold. There's not a lot of thermal lining. Yeah, you're right, actually. Yeah, that's just cotton. And every now and then a little hit of zip. And, you know, the zips get very cold on the winter mornings. That's why you need the possum nips.

Yeah. So my cat's got a possum friend. Wait, so how did it end, this conversation with the cat and the possum? I walked out there and the possum ran up to the top of the tree. Right. Scarpered. Yeah, scarpered up the tree. And the cat's just like, oh, see you later, I guess.

I mean, who are we to say what is love? You know, love is love. Love is blind. We're not saying that your cat can only be with a cat. Like Lady and the Tramp. Like she was a bougie cocker spaniel type thing and he was just some street dog. Yeah.

Yeah, exactly. Wow, your cat's in love with a possum. Not on my watch, mate. Not on my watch. Not in my day. I'm in love with a possum. Not on my watch, mate. Not on my watch. Not in my day. I'm in love with a possum. She's grinding that tree. And she's grinding.

Play it. ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley. Sometimes I rag on Gen Z. You know, what are you going to do? Well, you have had some complaints upheld against your behaviour. I have. I have. I have. And I have, I have.

And I want to sincerely apologise. I actually was talking to PAX Asadi, because of course I'm on the set of The Great Kiwi Biker for the moment. Yes. And we were having a chat yesterday about he's been working with some Gen Zers and we were like, God, they're just the worst. And off we went. We just utterly tore them apart for about 30 minutes.

Also, you're not like that far away. You're not like boomers. No, I know. But he was like, you know, this is just, this always happens. Each generation hates the last. Like it's just very normal to do it. Except Gen X gets away with murder. Like no one rags on Gen X.

No, no, they were fine. Because they kept their heads down. Yeah, they're like. Yeah. Let the boomers. Heads down. Whereas I think Gen like, shh, shh, shh. Let the booze, let the booze. Heads down. Whereas I think Gen Z is so entitled and very quite lazy.

But this is something that makes a lot of sense to me because apparently searches for picnic date ideas have grown by 385% in the last year. And picnic date ideas is a massive trend on the TikTok, on the talk in the grass. And everyone's doing, you know, like, it's all for the aesthetic of... Because it looks good. Yeah, it looks cool.

But do you also think that it's cheaper than a restaurant date at the moment, like with the cost of living? Yeah, Gen Z's broke ass. Well, everybody's finding it tough to, like, go on a date at the moment. Each generation, though, is always like... Like, if you have to pay. Yeah, everybody's finding it tough to go on a date at the moment. Each generation, though, is always like... If you have to pay. Yeah, exactly.

Also, though, this is what makes sense to me. I was like, oh, yeah, everyone's doing... Gen Z's into sort of cutesy stuff, like board games, not drugs. You know, like... Talking, not drinking. Yeah. You know. Oh, I don't know.

I've had a couple of games of Monopoly. We're at the end of it. You're just so bloody out of it. High on all of your capitalist power. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That can't be good for the organs, you know. Yeah. So I thought this was just this, that they're a bit cutesy, you know,

and don't want to drink and all that. But this is because a huge part of their social life, their early adult social life, was in COVID times where having picnics outside was genuinely the safest way to socialise, which makes a lot of sense. Oh, yeah, okay. I like a picnic. I like a picnic.

I love going somewhere. You get a hot choc, a bachelor's handbag. Now we're talking. Rip it apart, get some buns from the bakery. Buns and some slaw. Get some champagne ham. Yes. Oh, yes. Get in there for the... Like pre-cut cheese slices and a tomato.

Yes. Yep. Yep. Yep. The tomatoes are hard one because now I've got to take a sharp knife. You don't need a tomato. No, you can get one of those serrated plastic ones from the counter of the Dallas. You're going to absolutely mutilate a tomato with that. You're going to mutilate a tomato. You're better to take a Victronox. Get one of these Victronox. You're better to take a Victronox.

Get one of these Victronox out. What the hell? What's a Victronox? Dude, Victronox rules. Have you guys got Victronox knives? This is an unpaid endorsement for Victronox. They've got a brightly coloured handle. Oh, I've seen those. So they've got a serrated one, which is fantastic.

That's the best tomato cutting knife on the market. My friends have them and they always put them on their cheese boards and we were like, what are these weird plastic things? Yeah, the ghastly colours and it's a weird hard plastic. Where do you get them from? Swiss made them. Is it the same people that make

Swiss Army Knives? Swiss Army Knives, I think so. The original Swiss Army Knives were Victorinox. Victorinox. Do you reckon that's how that's said? I've never been corrected on it. Victorinox. Victorinox. I don't even know how many times I've said that out loud in my life. Already more now than ever before.

Yeah, right. Let's get some of these. Victorinox Knives, they're great and they're sharp and the paring knives are great and they would be a great addition to a picnic. They're called the Swiss Classic. The Swiss Classic. Yeah, I've just got on.

Yeah, look at that. Yeah, that's them. That's them. Hello. Or you can get a three packpack for $37.99. Are you on Chef's Compliments? Yes. How much is that?

A three-pack for there? Because you get them for $37. No, no, no, no, no, no. Don't go crazy. Just get them cheap. No, I think you're thinking of there's a knock-on version at Farmers or Briscoes. No, no, no, no, no. No?

No, no, no, no. Where do you get them from then? You mean at Stephen's. The fruit. Hayley, you know. Oh, you know what? I've got a Stephen's gift card I haven't used. Oh, go on the Stephen's site.

There he is. There he is. There he is. He'll get some sharp knives. You know that fruit and veg shop by the roundabout on the way in? Yes. Talking very local here. That's got them.

Right. That doesn't help most people. That's got them. It's got the peering and the serrated. Great for your vegetables and your stewed cuts. They're great knives. And again, I will reiterate, we're talking about picnics. They'd be absolutely perfect for a picnic. But do they

have a sheath? But dude, no. They come in a cardboard sheath. No sheath. Well, that's not good for a picnic. Dude, sharp. Watch your fingers. I'm going to get some Yeah they rule Do it I'm gonna get some

Good stuff They're really great You do need a knife for a picnic As a Swiss person This message just came in I'm offended Can we get Swiss text on the phone please We need the correct pronunciation of Victronox

Before the end of this break Victronox Victronox Are you telling me it's not Victronox Viggen writes and also sells them Oh okay fantastic Love a trip Viggen writes and I always walk out with things I don't need. I feel there's a knockoff version at like your farmers or your briscoes.

Don't buy me a knockoff. I don't want to buy the knockoff. They've got a plastic case though. They've got a plastic case. A sheath. A sheath. To keep you safe. For what you need for your Gen Z shape.

I want the real deal. I want the real deal. Bourne, can you go pick me some up, please, from the fruit and veg store? I'm busy. Are we just standing by? Are we getting a Swiss person on the phone? But, you know, this will be classic Swiss person. They will speak up.

They'll say something. But when we ask them to actually, you know, toe the line, they'll be like, no, we remain neutral. Oh, yeah, they'd give me a blow. Take a side already. Why don't you blow up the tunnels and the bridges So no one can get to you I've dabbled with quite a few Swiss men What do you mean quite a few Swiss men

Let's put a number to it You can't just say quite a few Swiss men There's probably only five of them You know I don't reveal my number What do you mean dabbled with Swiss men Are they good lovers Very neutral Near the handle there

They put a lot of time into the belly Are they good lovers? Very neutral. Neither here nor there. Yeah, sort of inoffensive. They put a lot of time into the belly, you know, between the two. Right. Okay. Caught between two warring factions. A lot of belly button work. Right. Sundreen, good morning.

Good morning. Good morning. Now, how Swiss are you? Half Swiss. Born in Switzerland. I actually grew up 10 minutes from the factory where the knives are made. Oh, my gosh. Before, I simply must know, what's the other half?

I'm Kiwi. Kiwi. Oh, lovely. Kiwi, Swiss. Right. And I simply must know, what do you make of the Swiss lovers? Have you taken a Swiss lover, Sandrine? No.

I moved to New Zealand when I was 14, and my partner is definitely born and bred in New Zealand. We're sloppy lovers. You're really sloppy. Really? Right. Okay. Now, Sandrine, how do we say the Swiss Army Knife brand? It's pronounced Victorinox.

Victorinox. Sounds South African. Victorinox. Victorinox. Yeah. Okay. Right. So that's way cooler than Victorinox.

That's Victorinox. We're very close. Victorinox. Yeah, it wasn't bad. It wasn't bad. Victorinox. Okay, fantastic. Well, yeah, apparently great knives.

Yeah. But you probably know that. You probably know that. They're't bad. Victorinox. Okay, fantastic. Well, yeah, apparently great knives. Yeah. But you probably know that. You probably know that. They're the best, yeah. Yeah. Great. She grew up 10 minutes from the factory. I did.

Do they give everybody in the town a little discount? No, not that I remember. But I definitely always grew up having Victorinox pocket knives, and my dad's always got one on him. Yes. Of course he would. Of course he does. That's so cool.

Wait, is dad the Swiss half or is dad? Yes. Yeah. Right. Amazing. What's your dad's name?

Patrick. Patrick. Oh, you were hoping for something real like Swiss food. Yeah. I had Hans or Franz.

Yeah. Sundreen, thank you very much for teaching us the pronunciation there. Yeah, appreciate it. Really appreciate that. And wow, what a journey we're on with these new knives. Stay churls.

Go on the Victoria Knox website and Sundreen 10, I believe, is the local discount code. Oh, yeah. Play ZM's Fletch Vornanalee. Play ZM. Well, last night A night of culture The theatre We went We went to the theatre

Did you go to the theatre? The theatre Well we went to Spark Arena The theatre It's so strange That it was there So Hamilton Is

Not the city Hamilton the musical Is on in Auckland Spark Arena Well Hamilton The city is on It's so strange that it was there. So Hamilton is, not the city, Hamilton the musical is on in Auckland. Well, Hamilton the city is on in Hamilton. It is on. Hamilton's just there all the time. It's Hamilton the city. Oh, yeah, yeah.

I mean, that would have been a... You can't avoid it, and sometimes you try to avoid it, and then you're like, how did I end up at this roundabout? This would have been a power play to have Hamilton the musical in Hamilton. It would have been great for Hamilton. It's a long way to drive just for a show.

Why are they doing it at Spark and not? Because it's just big. So you can fit more people in. This stage can't fit on the Civic. Oh, can it? No, it's a massive stage. Massive stage. And then the seats go back.

I think they're using the seats they use for the basketball or for those. The raked seating. Yeah, is that what you call it? Yeah. And then so, yeah, there's like, it goes right up to the back of the arena, but the sides, you don't sit on the sides. No, there's no one sitting on the sides. End on, end on they call that. End on.

Because I think otherwise you can peek to the side and you can see them like walking off and walking on. Yeah. So, yeah, but a load of people in the year. We went last night. I think it's been running for a couple of nights. It's my first time seeing Hamilton. A lot of singing. Do you know any of the songs?

I didn't know any of the songs. I went with all the producers. Yeah. Uncle Fletch took us to the theatre. Hang on. Hang on, hang on. Hang on. Why are you pretending like I have not been involved in this at all? Uncle Fletch was my date.

Well, yeah, Hayley was meant to come, but she was filming Bank of. And filming got delayed. So I said, Jared, you can have Hayley's ticket. Thank you very much, Hayley. You're welcome, Jared. Thank you for acknowledging my part in taking the producers to Hamilton. None of you would have been there if it wasn't for you. But, yeah, it was a lot of singing.

A lot of singing. A lot of singing. That's what a musical is. But too much singing for you? Finished like two hours past my bedtime. I was really struggling. You'll need a nap today then. Yeah, it was like, because I didn't know, I thought,

because you explained this to me, Hayley, earlier, there's two types of musicals. Yeah, one's a sung through. It's called sung through is one. And Hamilton's sung through, so nothing is. There's no talking. Everything's sung. Everything is sung.

Les Miserables is the same. So any time, like, you know, a lot of other musicals will go like, they'll sing a song and then they'll go, okay,s will go like, they'll sing a song. Yeah. And then they'll go, okay, off we go to something around and they'll talk. Yeah. I know. Those ones better. Gives you a bit of a break.

Everything is sung. But everything is sung. Oh, is that a bit much? I don't know how they memorize all of those lines and songs and raps. It's insane. It's so cool, eh? Because this was the Australian production. is that right? Yeah, it's the Australian cast, yeah. Because a lot of the time the musicals we get in New Zealand

are Amdram. Like, we don't get the big productions, so that's amateur dramatic societies putting them on. Yeah, yeah. And they might get a couple of professionals, but they often have a little tinge of shite. You know, they're like, not as good. Wow. Shots fired at the local Amdram community. Yeah. Go to drama school. You know what they're like, not as good. Wow. Shots fired at the local

Amdram community. Go to drama school. You know what I mean? Like train. But then, this one is legit. like, Morrinsville's got

the little theatre. Yes. And then every year, you know, someone puts on, and a lot of effort goes into it. And people love it.

Sorry, I'm like, the bloody sheep got out. And it's so good. And then they put on their little like the bloody sheep got out and it's so good and then they put on their little Rocky Horror Picture Show well because if you

were to put on a professional production of some of these productions like you couldn't like we couldn't just put on Hamilton because the licensing is so expensive

but if you're an Amdram society you don't have to pay the same licensing so that's why a lot of the Amdrams put on these huge musicals that like

professional companies can't afford to do. And they just sing it slightly off key. Because my mum and dad went to... Shots fired at the Amdram community. Wow. My mum and dad went to Kinky Boots at the weekend. Oh yeah, okay. So did Aaron. Is that a song all the way through? Because mum said they sang a lot.

No. What did she expect? It's a musical. My mum and dad go to a musical and then they were like, it was a lot. A lot of singing. That's a musical My mother Go to a musical And then go like There was a lot It was a lot A lot of singing It was a bit much

Well Hamilton She liked it though She did say it was good Hamilton Incredible show Good to see The return Because

Yeah I don't know The day That COVID Was kind of like Okay this is a big problem We need to shut the borders For a bit

Book of Mormon Had done like Two shows I know We went and bit. Book of Mormon had done like two shows. I know. We went and saw the Book of Mormon. And then the next day. And went out for dinner. And there was this kind of weird cloud looming. And then the pandemic hit and everything got shut down.

And yeah, it's good to get some of that stuff back. So good. Well, yeah, check it out if you're in Auckland or you can make it to Auckland for Hamilton. Tickets still available, I think. But this is a show you just can't get onto on Broadway. Like, if you went to America, you'd be paying, like, hundreds of dollars

or thousands for, like, the best seats. Yeah. Yeah. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. I just want to just quickly This is connected Yeah I tripped across

An Instagram account last night Where it's these guys In scuba gear And they strap a GoPro To their head And they swim around Like places where people Like jump off wharves

Or bridges and stuff And they collect All the treasure off the bottom Oh They find some things You would find some things Yeah yeah Phones

They found like And they had got This little handheld Metal detector And they found like, and they had got this little handheld metal detector and they found like car keys and all this cool stuff. Well, they found a knife. And I was like, murder weapon. Gotta be. 100%.

Gotta be. And this leads on to the story we're going to talk about now. An official from India, an Indian official in India Indian official In India And if would you say an official Indian? Well no I wouldn't say an official Well he is

He is officially Indian And he's an Indian official And he's very official He dropped his phone Into a dam A water reservoir. Have you seen the people that drop things into dams? Also love those videos.

Drop things into dams? Yeah, they're just like, oh, we've got a Swiss ball today and we're going to drop it off this giant dam. Oh, yeah, when the giant ball runs down. Yeah. And it goes, and it, for some reason, there's something to do with the force and it pops it out. Yeah.

Yeah, that's really cool. Fun. Have you seen those guys in Australia that have got an old broadcast tower and they crane things up and then drop it from really high heights? Yes, I have. And they explode. That's pretty cool too. Everyone just needs to calm down and get a real hobby.

It doesn't matter how old guys get. We love dropping things from high heights. They will love dropping things up from heights. One of my fondest memories as a teenager is throwing a condom full of water off the top of the centre place car park building in Hamilton. Condom. Oh, we used to do that. And watching it going...

And then just go... Have you ever hit anybody? No, no, no, no. We dropped it in the like alley to the side. Right, okay. Great stuff. Anyway, this guy dropped his phone in. He got... Firstly, asked some local divers To go down And he should have got the guys

That I've been watching They would have found this Look at the split Claiming it So this is the Indian official This is the Indian official He drops his phone Into the dam

In Indian Indian dam Yep And he said It contains sensitive Government information Oh because I was like Just let it go

Get insurance A.K.A There's some porn on there Porn Something's bad. Because when they couldn't find it, he hired two large diesel pumps and over the next three days pumped more than 2 million litres of water out of the reservoir.

He must be official if he has the authority to do that. No authority given. Just took it upon himself to hire it and try to get these out. Okay, what was on that phone? Don't know, but now they're without 200 million litres of water used to irrigate 600 hectares of important farming land during the Indian scorching summer. Wait, did he not put it back?

No, because he had to pump it. He didn't just have a 2 million litre container to pump it into to put it back on later. Oh, dear. The weirdest part is he actually ended up finding the phone but it was waterlogged and wouldn't start. I was going to say it wouldn't work, right?

Like even the waterproof phones now are only waterproof to X amount of metres. Death or time. And time, yeah. So just write it off. So he's been suspended from his job, likely not to get it back. So he's now not an official.

He's not an official but he's still an Indian. He's not an official, but he's still an Indian. He's still officially Indian, though. He's still officially Indian, but he's no longer an Indian official. Okay. And he needs a new phone, too. So I don't know what was on that phone. We may never retrieve it. There was some nudes.

I'm going to say there was some nudes. I want to say he murdered someone and all the information's on the phone. Could be. But to drain a dam to get your phone back, that is insane. I dropped, I think the worst place I've dropped, I dropped my phone in the ocean once. I was, my godfather took me out fishing. And I did that thing where you just like lift your phone

to take a photo of the ocean and just like, and just sort of like gave it to the ocean basically. But I didn't try to, I didn't drain the Auckland Harbour. I just left it. I think you'd be pumping for a while to be draining the Auckland Harbour or just the world's ocean. The worst I did was I was on a plane and I had my phone in my back pocket and I went to the toilet and I did the thing where you flip your pants down

and it fell into the toilet and I just grabbed it out. Ew. Had it gone down the little flap? Because you know there's that flap in the plane toilet. No, it hadn't gone down the, it hadn't like flipped the thing yet. You wouldn't put your hand past the flap thing, right?

Hell no. As someone who is currently peeing into a port-a-loo you don't even look beyond the flap. Even at a festival I'd let it go. I'd just ride it off. Curiosity past the flap killed the cat for me. I use all of my strength to wheeze on the flap as hard as I can to push it down, and then I have a quick look.

Oh, why would you do that? I don't know. It's gross, and every time I regret it. I never want to look. That would be a great silly little poll. Do you look past the flap in a pool? It is good, though. You know you're having a really good wee when the flap sets itself off.

Yeah, pang, pang, tang, tang, tang, tang, pang, tang, tang. You're like, take it away. No need for the prostate check, thank you, doctor. No. The urethra doth flow. We want to take your calls this morning and get your stories. How far did you go to get your phone back? Did you have to reach into a gross hole or a gross space?

Or did you like have a, have a well entitled one night stand and then you left, you left your phone there and you had to go back. And break into their house because you didn't want to see them again. Yeah. Or did you drain a dam of 200 million litres of water? No, just 2 million litres. Only 2 million. To get your phone back. 0800 DARS at M. We want to take your calls. You can text

as well. 9696. How far did you go to get your phone back? Talking about a man that drained a dam just to get his phone back. 2 million litres of water. And at the end of it, the phone didn't even work. No, it wouldn't have logged. Some messages in

Instagram replies. Danica says I dropped it in a port-a-loo when I was drunk. Reached in to get it over. Whole port-a-loo tipped over. Oh my god. Take me away. No. Gareth, you also had a public toilet whoopsie with your phone?

Oh, it wasn't with my phone. I got a desperate phone call from my wife on her friend's phone telling me that she had dropped it in a public toilet. This is in Dubai. So it's for squatting toilets, the ones that you sort of... Oh, yeah. Oh, a hole in the ground. Yeah, so this is going back a good 10 years.

So she rang me up and said, you need to come now and you need to bring a plastic bag, not really telling me what I needed it for or anything like that, which was a bit unusual. So basically I'm rocking up and then she's telling me that she's lost her phone and that she needs it because it's kind of like half sitting there,

down as you can kind of see it. So I basically had to shoulder up the bag all the way up the arm and because it's a squatting toilet you can't really, you just kind of have to get down on top of it like you're almost kind of doing a press up. Wait, why are you doing this dude?

Give her the place to do it. You're in the Middle East, they've got no respect for women get in. So yeah, so the worst fishing expedition I've ever been on, but I did manage to find it. Yes, okay. And it survived. It survived.

Now she can never divorce you. No. Also, I imagine if she didn't tell you what it was for, I just probably would have grabbed a bread bag. Oh, yeah, yeah, true. Yeah, not a bin liner. But then, yeah, that would go elbow max, wouldn't it? Yeah, because that sounded like that was a big black sack.

Yeah, you got a big black sack. That's a big, big, yeah, yeah, big rubbish bag, that one. That is large. How far have you gone to get your phone back? An Indian official drained a water reservoir. Very important to local farmers during the scorching Indian summer to get his phone back that he dropped And after all that the phone didn't even work

No Jack, this was a mate's phone How far did they go to get the phone back? Yeah, sorry guys, it's another toilet story Oh, we're sick of them See, I would just let it go, eh? Yeah, so we're at a festival Your phone costs a lot of money

Oh, mate, you're at a festival That's so much worse than a standard portalo. Portalo's at festivals are, man. Feral. Yeah. It's down in Nelson, so I'm assuming the only festival down here is Bay Dreams, it would have been. Yep. Absolutely off the shops.

Dropped his phone, like, in the portalo, running around telling everyone he's dropped his phone in the portalo. Went back in, elbow deep, grabbed it, running around chasing people with his hand covered in... Oh, nice. He's drunk, isn't he? He's out of the friend group. And that's how he got E. coli and Campylobacter in Giardia. And he did it.

And he did it. Thanks, E. coli. Jack, some messages in. Hannah might say, my phone fell out of my hand, bounced once on a storm grate and then turned perfectly and slipped down the...

Oh. I mean, you can't fault the phone on its entrance. Boing. Slip. 10 out of 10. And she said

they lifted off the great drain cover. Those things are heavy. Got it out of very gross water. Travelled back to Auckland from overseas after my phone turned up two years later, said Amy. So she lost her phone. Two years later, it shows up in Auckland. She comes back to get it.

So she literally did. How far did you go to get your phone back? She went a long way. She took far as in literal kilometres and travelled for it. Some other text messages in. I had to get neck deep in swamp water. But it was my dog that eventually went

under and found the phone. It was absolutely fine. Good boy. We were sitting at a waterfront bar in Paihear watching in horror as a child at the table next to us dropped his mum's phone over the rail and into the water. The mum was distraught so my friend called her husband who came down from the house with his snorkel gear on, jumped into

the water, retrieved the phone. It was still working. The woman was extremely grateful and paid for our drinks. Oh. That's not right. That's a good way of getting free drinks. For kids on a phone, be like, I could shuck your mum's phone in the drink. And your dad's just around the corner with a snorkel ready to get it.

Do you think that's a local scam? Yeah, could be. To watch out for, a tourist scam. Somebody else said, back in the day I dropped my flip phone into a bonfire that we were having at a party. Someone grabbed a flick and stick and flicked it out. It was melted and worked, but it was one of those ones where

you had to push the numbers multiple times to get the letters. Oh, yeah. I couldn't use anything on the 7. Right. They don't make phones like they used to, eh? Nah, which from my memory was the QRS. Yeah.

QRS. No, because T was on the 8. Anyway, lots of people are going to extreme. And also, somebody just said, next time you add a port-a-loo, just speaking about the flaps as you wee on it, if it goes flap, flap, flap. Current winner of a flap competition at a party one night, I got 14 flaps on a portal loop in one week.

Oh, bravo. That's a heavy stream. You're stopping and starting. I reckon they were... Pump, pump, pump. They were stopping and starting to get that sort of number. That's a phenomenal number. Play ZM's Fletch for the Nailie.

Play ZM. Aaron and I are still on our little dating run at the moment because I'm in my Airbnb. While you're filming the great Kiwi Bake Off. Which, by the way, I've spilt so much crap on the floor. And now I'm like, how do I clean it up? There's no vacuum cleaner. But they don't clean it. I'm here for like three weeks.

Yeah, it's not a hotel. But there should't clean it. I'm here for like three weeks. Yeah, it's not a hotel. They just clean it at the end. But there should be a vacuum. I'm going to have to go home and get a vacuum cleaner and break it. Yeah, three weeks is a long time to live somewhere without. Yeah, and then I was like, do I have to change the sheets? But there's no dryer. And then I'm going to have no sheets for a bit.

Ew, three-week sheets. Or my banky sheets for three weeks. No. Anyway, but Aaron's obviously been like coming over after I get home from set right and having dinner with me and then the other night, was it Friday night? Friday night, yep.

Yeah, Friday night. In fact, it was the day that Bourne was like, what time do you wrap? Because we could have a beer and I was like, probably gonna be a little bit late. So then I was like, I'll just meet up with Aaron at the Airbnb afterwards and then he was like ignoring my messages and I was like, I'll just meet up with Aaron at the Airbnb afterwards. And then he was like ignoring my messages

and I was like, hey, I'm like finished. He was busy. Heading down the hill. Where are you? What time you coming round? I got to the Airbnb, had a shower, everything.

And then I was like, where is this man? And then I get a message from Vaughan, unprovoked. And it's my fiance with a bloody gun in his hand. In the group chat. Yeah.

Yeah, and he's shooting at cans that I want to say were too close to the cows, Vaughn. No, we were shushing the cows out of the way behind it. It's a slug gun. I don't want anyone to think we were just Friday night beers in a 303 or anything like that. It's a slug gun. I don't want anyone thinking we were just Friday night beers in a 303 or anything like that. It's a slug gun. Right. And there was some rabbits. They all ran away.

They knew the minute the gun came out. It was at our friend Jake's place, which is like elevated. So we put some cans down on the fence. And so we had a couple of beers and sat up on the deck shooting cans. I love shooting the slug gun when I was a kid at cans. It was so much fun. Slug gun sights haven't been in for ages. So we sighted it.

The lads, we sighted three of us, put our heads together and sighted in the gun. And then, yeah, we were popping them off. Do you reckon I can do a slug gun at the domain? I really want to be invited next time. I mean, where do you even come next time? We shoot the cans. And then, yeah. I've never shot a slug gun in my life,

let alone a bloomin' real gun. But it was so strange that he was like, yeah, I'll be there. You just text me as soon as you leave set and I'll be at your house. And then I'm like, there's a picture of him bent over a blooming spa pool in a moleskin jacket. Who is this man with a gun in his hand?

Yeah. We're shooting. We're shooting tins. And that was a thing because we were drinking beers. You'd finish your beer and then you'd walk down and you'd put it on the fence to shoot it. Did you shoot a full can? No.

Because then it would come out. It would be fun. I'd sacrifice a can, a full can? No. Because then it would come out. It would be fun. I'd sacrifice a can, a full can. No. What? Well, you'll be drinking Pals or something. No. That's on you.

You can't sacrifice our beers. Pals are yuck. Oh, yuck. You can't sacrifice our beers for whatever you're shooting. Yeah, it would have to be cheap beers. But I taught my daughters to shoot the slug gun at the weekend too. Can I shoot a bottle of Prosecco? Jesus.

No. Because you only get one shot at those You only get one shot at that. And then also if it's a thick bottle, I remember shooting a wine bottle when I was a kid with a slug gun and it wasn't strong enough to break the bottle and it went. Oh, she ricocheted. That's scary because you don't know where that's going to go. Safety first.

Was Aaron any good? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Once it was sighted in, he was a regular. Daniel Boone, that's what you say if someone's a to go. Safety first. Was Aaron any good? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Once it was sighted in, he was a regular. Daniel Boone, that's what you say if someone's a good shot. You call him Daniel Boone. Why? And you got the girls into it. Yeah, so I told my daughters how to shoot the slug gun.

It's got a scope on it. And I said to Indy when she was lining it up, I said, now pull your head back a little bit from that scope because it doesn't have a lot of kick, but it's a spring. So I pushed it back a little bit. And she was like, what have a lot of kick, but it's a spring, so push it back a little bit. And she was like, what? And pulled the trigger and it went poof. I'm pumped.

Popped it right in the eye. She's like, I'm not doing it again. But then August was real good. Yeah, right. Yeah. But then I got a video of her shooting a can and it like jumping up and spinning around and like landing really dramatically. But then I'm like, I'm not going to put a photo of my eight-year-old shooting a gun online.

That's just going to be... Oh, yeah, you'll get a bit of... Even though it's a slug gun, powered by a spring. Yeah. Yeah. Completely legal. Safety precautions were taken. Fun.

It was actually a very proud father moment. Right, and when did you get your fiancé back after all of this? Well, after 18 beers and a few successful shots. Yeah, I know. But you're only dating. And then, right. I didn't see a ring on his finger. Here's the thing.

Shut up. Here's the thing. Did you see the watch on his wrist? Here's the thing. He turns up, right, and he's had the amount of drinks he's allowed to have for the night. And then, so I go, oh, let's go out for dinner. And he was like, yeah, cool. Can you drive?

And I was like, excuse me, I've been working all day. And he's like, yeah, but I've had a couple of beers of Vaughan. I'm a fun guy to have a couple of beers with, as it turns out. Yeah, but you took that from me, and then I had to drive, and I wasn't allowed a couple of drinks. Well, that sounds like I might have started an argument. And next, we're going to hear a question to be asked to the person you're arguing with

that this relationship expert thinks will extinguish an argument. This person must be a sadist. Everyone here in the relationship is saying it will have the exact opposite effect. We just quickly have had some word from Queenstown residents. There's a bit of a traffic delay somewhere. Severe traffic congestion. Severe, severe. Between Calvin Heights and Hanley's Farm.

Yes, not moving. People aren't moving. Must be nice. Living in Queenstown. Yeah, of course it's nice. Meanwhile, Auckland listeners, there's congestion, but that's just called Auckland. Yeah, there's congestion from your front door to your destination.

Yeah. That's just called Auckland. Yeah, there's congestion from your front door to your destination. Yes. Whether it be school, work, or the gym, or now I've got a list everywhere. No, you don't need to. Thank you. Thank you for giving me the out. Now, there is a relationship expert. Her name is Lauren, and I believe she hath a death wish because she has advised, well, she's called it basically the way to stop an argument in its tracks when it's starting to feel like it's escalating too much or it's getting derailed.

Okay. So say you get in one of those arguments, so it's just not going anywhere and it's getting maybe louder and louder and you're making less and less sense. She says, I want you to do this. Pause. Already I'm like, impossible. No, because you don't want to lose your momentum in a good argument, do you? Exactly, because when I lose my momentum, it'll go, and then because of my very scrambled brain, I'm like,

well, now I don't know where I'm at. Pause and say, I want to understand what just happened there. What did you hear me say? Wait, that's the thing to say. What did you, sorry, I'm just seeing that we're going off track there. What did you hear me say wait that's the thing to say what did you sorry i'm just seeing that we're going off track there i just want to understand me say i just want to understand what's happening what did you hear me say what did you hear is it to prove is it so the other person is then proven that they're not listening but you can't do that i did that to aaron i'm like you're not listening and then he was like yes and he'll literally repeat back to me

probably the last two or three sentences I've said. Yeah, yeah, you get that. Well, maybe you're listening, but you're not hearing me. She says this question is, it does one of two things. First, it can allow for clarification. No, it can't. It's putting gas on the fire. It allows for clarification.

A lot of the times we've become quite defensive at this point and maybe we start interpreting what our partner is saying wrong. We get triggered and we're just going, oh, that you mean this. When you say that, you mean this. So we're actually asking for clarification. So I say something, I say, what did you hear? What did you think I just said then? The second thing is if your partner did interpret what you said correctly, it gives you an opportunity to slow things down because you go, okay, so you are listening to me. Thank you. You can hear what I'm saying.

But there's something about the framing of that sentence that is like all off for me. Someone just literally text messaged in, what the F for word? I know. Exclamation mark. No exclamation mark. Can you imagine if Aaron said that to me, I'd be like, oh, you pretentious, righteous little prick.

I beg your pardon. I just couldn't. I couldn't. Oh, my God. Someone just texted saying it works for them all the time. But is it because it gives the other person a chance to realise that maybe they are being a bit unreasonable? No one in the midst of an argument has the ability to realise they're being unreasonable.

Why would they be fighting to the death for their point if they believe it to be unreasonable? Yeah, true. Aaron's got a really good... He said this years ago. He was like, sometimes you need to leave space for people to be unreasonable. Yeah, true. Aaron's got a really good, he said this years ago. He was like, sometimes you need to leave space for people to be unreasonable. And I think he said that after years of being with me. And he will allow it for a certain amount of time.

Like, he'll just let me go, okay. And then I'll find my, and I'll get to the scrambly little wall, and then I'll be like, Aaron, I hear I'm being unreasonable. And he's like, thank you. He's a pragmatic man. It's very good. It's very good to just let them be unreasonable. But don't try and stop it.

We're getting feedback. Real-time feedback. SFTU. Now, I usually say STFU. Shut the F up. But this stands for seek first to understand. So try to understand. Where they're coming from.

So you could say something along the lines of, I understand where you're coming from. It's moronic. But I have really done my best. You've tripped up there. I've tripped up there. Okay, let me try again. I have sought to understand where you're coming from.

It's a wildly incorrect position. However, that's not right as well. That's not going to work either. Somebody says it sounds too condescending. It does sound condescending, yeah. I'm not your kid. I'm your partner. Does this work on teenagers?

No, no, no, no, no. Nothing works on teenagers. No. Nothing works on teenagers. Teenagers are like earthquakes. Find somewhere safe to shelter and ride it out. You get under the bed? Yeah, that is the entire teenage years.

Hold on tight. This may be the first time anybody has ever messaged in and quoted Brene Brown to us. Oh, wow. Okay. Am I saying that right? Brene Brown. She does TED Talks and stuff. I don't know. The story I'm telling myself is so that's what you say to them from what you're There's TED Talks and stuff, yeah? I don't know. The story I'm telling myself is.

So that's what you say to them? Yeah. From what you're hearing from them, I understand. So you say something, they go, okay, well, the story I'm telling myself is that you're feeling this and that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Am I correct? Oh, yeah. Okay, that's a good one.

I don't. I don't. None of these people have argued with Sade. Yeah, I feel like these people are writing these tips, like these relationship experts, when they're not in the middle of an argument. Yeah. You've got pepper in you.

That's like giving people fire safety advice when you're in a place that can't catch on fire. When you're underwater. I want you to be in the middle of a raging inferno dishing out these safety tips somebody said the best way to win an argument now this is not the best way to win an argument okay the best way to win an argument is to say oh you always have to have the lows the last word don't you because then they either shut up and you win which yes this is somebody else's opinion not

mine yeah or keep talking and prove your point, in which case you also win. Low-key toxic, but that's okay. Low-key toxic. But it's low-key. That's high-key. That's high-key. Someone said, if I'm in the middle of a war zone, I'm definitely not being calm and reasonable.

I let unreasonable chaos reign. Yeah. Well, good luck. You've got to leave space for it. Good luck, guys. Good luck. Good luck. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day,

day, day, day, day. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. Today's fact of the day, if you're about to go on a plane, this could be of interest to you. Oh, my parents are on a plane right now. Well, one of them probably would have the middle seat. Nah, they're in business class. Private school, she's in private school Darling Of course

Of course My mum's been messaging me The whole time I'm like How are you messaging me She's like Business class darling Business class

She also messaged me saying I thought you'd like this flit She was like There's a crying baby up here It shouldn't be allowed Bear bag Who bought the bear bag Wait

Does a baby have to pay The full price For a business class seat? I don't know. I actually had another very interesting fact of the day about why babies don't pay full price. And they should pay their way. They should pay their way. Because they don't have a job.

They don't have an income. Oh, it's not in here. I thought I had this one. Saved for another day. Basically, someone did the maths of if a family had to pay to fly and a baby needed its own seat, so add in the cost, the percentage of families that it would force to drive would mean more people on the road, and then using the percentage of people Who died in car accidents would mean more

Babies would die in car accidents Jeepers An economist did the maths on it And that's why they said to airlines Granted you're not responsible But a baby that could sit on the mother's knee That doesn't need it's own seat Is this much more likely

But it's so much inconvenience to the rest of the passengers Especially when they've played for business class. Poor Patsy. Is she doing okay? Is she doing okay? I think she's half drunk at this point, somewhere over the bloody Pacific Indian Ocean. I just think it's wild someone has a baby

and they can afford to fly. Oh, I know. That's true, yeah. Get it right up there. So today's track of the day is about flying. It's about the middle seat. And in a recent survey of passengers and airline staff, it was voted upon middle seat gets armrest priority on both sides.

Yeah. Yeah, I think so. I agree. Because they have the inconvenience of being in the middle, so they should get some perk. Window, you get the lean. You get the armrest, and you also get the curvature of the fuselage. Yes.

So you get extra leaning space. Yep. But you have to get across people. When you need a ways. When you need a way. So that's your positive and your negative. Yes. On the aisle, if you fall asleep and your knee goes into the aisle,

it's going to get banged by the drinks trolley. Yes. Negative. But you're free to roam. But you're free to roam. Yes. Positive. Positive.

Middle seat, nothing. Nothing positive. No positive. Nothing positive. Nothing positive. You're stuck. You've got to climb over. People go to the toilet.

There's nowhere to lean. Yep. And you're stuck in there. You're not freedom. So people voted that the etiquette would be you get priority at both armrests. Now, if you don't use them, it is optional for the other passengers to then weigh in and take the armrest. But you get first choice.

But once it's been decided, yeah, yeah, yeah. You get first choice. Nothing better than when you sit down in your long-haul seat and there's some little old lady who's like five foot tall, she's little and slight, and she sits down next to you like, yes. Unless she's chatty, though. Yeah, what if she pops out her Bible? Put your headphones on.

And starts wanting to chat. Put your headphones on. What if she starts telling you to hurry up because, you know, time's ticking and you don't want to not have children? Yeah. And how do you use the in-flight entertainment? I've had that before. Oh, yeah.

And what does your wife do? And you're like, I'm actually a young homosexual. Yeah, yeah. And she's like, ah! And then that shuts her up. She's like, oh, my God! And that shuts her up

for the rest of the flight. Read, bless, cure. So today's fact of the day is people have voted and the results are that the middle seat gets both armrests on a plane. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. It's just over a month until my triumphant return to Disneyland. Very much so.

Counting down the days. Yeah, and I was allocating some of the holiday budget for more lightsabers. And I was being told in no uncertain terms that was not happening. And I said, in many certain terms, it shall happen. And then I got the children chanting lightsabers and I was being told in no uncertain terms that was not happening and I said in many certain terms it shall happen and then I got the children chanting lightsabers and we were and then I went and got my lightsabers that I bought last time out they had a lightsaber fight they're your uh Minnie Mouse ears they're your Mickey Mouse ears that one's very expensive Mickey Mouse ears yes and you make the point you've you got your lightsabers are you already own lightsabers correct you don't need any more lightsabers.

Well, don't I? Well, what do you do with them? That would make a fine addition to my collection. You just put them in a drawer. Well, so then that was talked about. Then the next day we were cleaning the house and Shadow was doing the bathrooms and I said I'll do the lounge and the cabinets and stuff.

This is how you get the brownie points. This is how you get the brownie points. And whilst that was happening, I got my little display racks and put all the lightsabers out on the cabinet under the TV and some of the Star Wars paraphernalia. And she walked into the lounge and she was like, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, we don't do that.

You're interrupting the Scandi aesthetic. The Scandi aesthetic? Yeah. Why can't Scandinavians be Jedi? They want lightsabers. They put it out there. It's more of an industrial theme. Bit of an industrial vibe.

Star Wars. More of an industrial vibe. Bit of a post-apocalyptic. Here's what planet you guys are in. Might work in an old warehouse on the wall. That would be nice. Yeah, like a workshop, but not a Scandi minimalist house. Well, today I've been gifted

from producer Shanalette Pyjamas my very own... Is this crocheted? This is a crocheted grogu. This is what the Gen Zs do. They don't go out and drink and do drugs. They crochet.

Yeah, and watch out because that new movie Crochet Bears coming out soon about a bear that finds some crochet supplies from a plane and does crochet for everybody. It's the Gen Z version of Cocaine Bear.

How long did this take you to make? Maybe about six hours, seven hours. Seven hours of your weekend? A real labour of love. Yeah. To make Vaughan a baby Yoda crochet doll? Yeah, Jared's got a matching one. Now they have matching toys.

Whose is bigger? Vaughan demanded his would be bigger than Jared's. So I had to go to Spotlight and buy Vaughn's special yarn. Wow. Did you invoice Vaughn for this? I've said, please invoice me. No, I'm not going to invoice you. It's a gift.

Look at this thing. This is as cute as heck. It's pretty cute. I'll give you that. That's going to look good on the TV cabinet. She's not going to let you put that on the TV cabinet. It's Scandinavian, though, because it's... Would you let your boyfriend put that on the TV cabinet? It's Scandinavian though because it's Macrambler.

Would you let your boyfriend put that on the TV cabinet? Either of you two? No. Wahine, no. Well, my house is full of shit like that. Well, yeah, you are dating a magician. So that's... If he doesn't like something being displayed, he just makes it disappear.

Yeah, true. Yes. He's like, oh, look at this Macrambler. What? Where's it gone? Play it. ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Well, a study's been done.

Now, this is in America where a lot of people are still working from home. And what was the stat I just told you? I didn't want to. 87% of people are going to go into the office two to three days a week tops. That's nuts, right? Like, I thought in New Zealand most people were doing like one, like a three day weekend or working from home one day a week.

But yeah, in America it's two to three days a week. So they ask these people like what will it take to get you back into the workplace? Because I feel like people are being a bit more open about working from home now and their anger and their angst

towards it? Are you finding that? Like, are you hearing a lot of comments like, oh, get back to work? Because let's be honest, we know what you're doing at home. Yeah. You're playing with yourself most of the time. Yeah, a lot of playing. You're doing the washing.

A lot of playing. You're watching Netflix. Sometimes I pretend I'm working from home just so it's a bit more of exciting when I do play with myself. Yeah. And you're doing less work than you would be doing at work. Let's be honest. But no, if you're getting it done, this is my thing.

If you're setting someone a task and their task is to do jobs one through five and they get one through five done and then that's all you've asked of them and they've completed the door. Then who cares? And of the same quality that you get at work. I don't see the problem of where they're doing it. Yeah. I know some people get off on like Like an office

What's the word I'm after here Hierarchy No no no Well yes That's problematic That you were I'm just saying

That you love being The top dog Well I Wherever I am I'm top dog Yeah yeah It doesn't matter Where I'm top dogging

I'm top dogging You're co-CEO Aren't you Yeah yeah I just like to lend a hand In the CEO stuff When time allows And time always allows It doesn't matter to me where I'm top-dogging, I'm top-dogging. You're co-CEO, aren't you? Yeah, yeah. I just like to lend a hand in the CEO stuff when time allows and time always allows. Of course. No, it's a camaraderie.

Sort of like you get there and everybody's there and it's like, hooray, we're more than workmates. We're friends. You just miss that opportunity as well to be like, stand up and go to somebody and say, can we just get this done now? Like, can you sort this out? Oh, you're talking like an immediate face-to-face. Yeah, and also like, is it hard to progress your career if nobody

sees you and you're always working from home? You know what I mean? I don't know. If you're given the job, then you're doing a good job of it. Maybe not. Well, the two things... Man, that guy's never any hassle. He just gets it done from home and lets us know when there's a problem and solves problems. Well, they asked people, what would bring you back to the office?

And, you know, we're all pretty simple people. Half of workers want free coffee and food. Well, that's all it's going to take. That's all it's going to take, apparently. I thought we were going to make some sort of big stand, like a just stand that is working conditions. It's just coffee and food. Free coffee and food, yeah. I know some workplaces that do, like, they'll have big fruit bowls and stuff in the kitchen.

That's pretty cool. That's just fruit flies, though. You are asking for fruit flies. You're fighting the negative in that. You can put the fruit in the fridge. For fruit flies. No, because, oh, no, you can't. Cold bananas. Oh, no, you don't put bananas in the fridge. But what are you putting in the fridge for fruit flies. No, because, oh, no, you can't. Cold bananas.

Oh, no, you don't put bananas in the fridge. But what are you putting in the fridge? I put apples, mandarins. Oh, no, my teeth hurt. My teeth hurt. You've got to have a room here in Redrabble. Cold apples ruin me, man. Just put up with some fruit flies.

I don't want fruit flies in the office. Enjoy the free fruit from work. I'm going to get one of those little machines. Then you're going to have the residual stuff on the fruit. Why don't we just work from home? Pick our own work conditions. You know, we can really control the environment. I guess so. Hey, guys, apparently being the company's most successful podcast isn't enough.

They want us to tell people to tell more of their friends. So people are clearly liking it, but we have to tell them to tell others to like it. I would concentrate more on the shitter podcast that the company makes. Yeah, same. You know, the real losers out there. Same. See, I would concentrate more on the shitter podcasts that the company makes. Yeah, same. You know, the real losers out there. Same. No, no, no, we'll just... Yeah.

Maybe we won't say nice. Maybe we should even encourage people to listen to other podcasts that the company makes. Yeah, nah. No, but only after ours. Yeah, nah, nah, don't do that. And not more than ours. Give us a sexy little review, though.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.