ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 29th September 2026

Episode Date: September 28, 2026

(00:00) Intro (02:00)  Are you J Nielson (09:35) SLP - Do you set a buffer alarm? (15:15) Hayley's dog update (20:05) Top 6 - Ways to not be one of the billion to be killed by AI (23:55) People taking stress leave for loud offices (29:00) Movies written by woman are better (33:20) When did emergency services have to rescue you? (44:10) VMA's Wrap (50:00) What does your partner destroy? (1:02:35) Fact of the day (1:08:30) Gay Farmer day (1:12:15) Hayley's an electrician  (1:19:20) Did pets cause drama in the seperation? (1:25:00) Would we get into Berhain? (1:29:50) Kiwi onion dip and chip sandwhich might win an award See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZM Podcast Network. This is Fleshwood and Haley's Big Pod. Brought to you by Chemist Warehouse. The biggest brands of the lowest prices. Today's the 29th of September. How many days does September? 30. Well, so it's October on Thursday.

Yeah. That is correct. Fantastic. Just get the Christmas tree up and just get there, you know what I mean? Today, of course, we celebrate Gay Farmer Day. Yes, happy Gay Farmer Day. We are going to talk about this on the show this morning. Yeah.

A celebration Last year? Yeah Okay Yeah Something that happened on this day last year Well you know We are hoping it'll catch on like Christmas

Except it's non-secular of course Any religion can celebrate Gay Farmer Day Had a lot of listeners message out after we Yeah It was really weird yesterday We started getting messages We were like

Don't forget tomorrow's Gay Farmer Day So we were like Are you talking about? Yeah We'll get into that later on the show Are the top six A billion of us are going to get wiped out by AI. That's according to a forecast.

I volunteer as tribute. Well, I've got the top six ways not to be one of the billion wiped out by AI. Yeah, you've got an update as well how you're dealing with your neighbour's dog. Yeah, I do. Yeah, it took matters into my own hands yesterday, made a purchase, and it's going to be delivered straight to their doorstep. It's actually very generous of me. And I'd like to play some audio of a new addition to the household noise that they've curated for me.

Wow, good. Yeah. It's really fun. You're going to be in the news one day in the coming months. Just absolutely losing your shit and you're just not a know. ZM's Haley Sprouse seem naked and parading around her neighbor's yards, screaming, speaking in tongues, tearing her own hair out. Next on the show. Are you related to a Jay Nelson who lived in Glasgow in 1902?

I don't know. If you are, your great-granddad, or great-great-granddad, is wanted. Clay Z-M Fletch forna. Really beautifully said there with beautiful pronunciation. I went to France twice. Wow. And it shows.

It shows. It shows. Wow. Now the Egyptian pyramid, none of us have seen the pyramids. Nah, haven't been. Apparently they're smaller. They are smaller and they're right on the cusp of the city. And you think it's in the middle of the desert.

They take the photos from the side that doesn't have a city in the background. And it's all sandy. Remember that? that. Carl Pilkington. Just tearing down the pyramids, by the way, one of the greatest accomplishments of you. Literally,

the last surviving wonder of the world, the ancient world. So New Zealand. So New Zealand of us. Tiny and right near the Yuck city. Yeah, yuck. Didn't Carl Pilkington go there? Remember the Richard base guy?

And he was like looking at the pyramids in a KFC thing blew past. He's like, KFC at the pyramids. It was just so unexpected. What more could you want in life? Well, in 1951, Egypt ban climbing the pyramids. With the penalty of up to three years,

in prison. But it wasn't until 1973 that they sort of actually enforced it. So that was when people stopped casually climbing. In 2016, an 18-year-old German tourist, Andre Kinchkin climbed it and took photos of himself 455 feet up.

Small, though, I fletched tiny. Tiny. And he got banned from Egypt for life. Oh, really? See later. A Danish photographer and a woman with him climbed the Great Pyramids in the late 2010s and took nude photos of her at the top and then angered many Egyptians. And no one since has been a high-profile climbing case.

But in the late 1800s and early 1900s, there was no preservation measurements to protect the pyramid. The Sphinx was kind of buried under sand. So they kind of uncovered that, and that's when people started getting interested in it. And people would just climb it up. Climb up it. In 1938, there's a photo I've seen

where a group of tourists are having tea up the Great Pyramids. and apparently locals would climb the pyramids and drag their stuff up for them If you could climb them That would be so cool No, no No those are the oldest bloody stones ever

I wouldn't trust it Look at this Okay so here's the picture In them having a tea party At the top of the pyramids Pretty legendary pick If that was granddad That'd be pretty sick

That's pretty cool That'd be pretty cool Well one of the people who Has permission to go up there And his photograph The like deterioration Of the pyramids and what it's like up the top.

From other people having tea parties up there. Like modern day they're allowed to go up it. Very, very really. Okay. Like the guy that has taken these photos, Egyptian photographer Osama Serif, he is up there to catalogue the deterioration of it. Right.

He's not like know where it's at and make sure other people haven't been up. And he took some photos up the top and said, you know, this graffiti is from 1902 and it says Jay Nelson from Glasgow. What is it? Like they chiseled.

Yep. You cheeky bastard. So the main... Like a Kiwi picnic table. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And just carve it in. So James Nielsen, a well-known amateur scientists from Glasgow and vice president of the Geological Society of Glasgow.

In 1902, released a book called Notes from a recent trip to Egypt. So he's the number one suspect. Right. We know he was there. Yeah. But there's all over the... Do you know the most famous one is Sir Thomas Lipton? Tea.

The tea man. Exactly him. He reportedly paid to have his name engraved and Scotland beside it above the Great Pyramid's entrance in 1882. So it was a bit of a thing that Scots did. They went down there and they carved their name, their names in it.

Just looking at some photos of them, they are impressive. I want to take back my earlier statement that they're quite small and pathetic. Like they're really... They're old though. It's insane. I mean, the fact that, like, has I made that...

That's my hot take, by the way. They're old. They're old. Yeah, great hot take. Yep, yep. Thanks. Just like how they make them? It's insane, eh?

Dude, levers and stuff. Aliens, of course, sorry, aliens. Leavers and stuff. Yeah, that's what they want you to think. It's aliens. It's the only explanation. So the internet didn't really have too long to figure this one out, did they? No, it's pretty, it's not like locked in.

Yes, it was definitely harm, but they were like, he was in Egypt, he wrote a paper about it. He was, like, fascinated about it's geologists. Yeah. He's from Glasgow. He's from Glasgow. It's his initials. Scottish heritage. I'm a bit worried. I could be related to this crim-crum. This graffiti

artist. Yeah. Okay, I'm looking at another photo of just how close they are to like a sort of boring city and I actually reinstate. They're not that impressive. I'm really flip-flopping on the pyramids here. Look quite small. If you think about what they had at the time, they couldn't just whip down to might of 10 years a higher

trailer. Yeah. You know? It's impressive. And grab some more Steins. It was very impressive. It would have gone bigger if I went to all that effort. If they wanted to get away with it, they needed to use a nickname. like, you know, graffiti artists do now. Like Bloom and Physio. Fizio.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Physio is massive in Auckland at the moment. Which one? Physio. P. I assume it's said physio. It's Fyso. Yeah. Fizio.

Physio? Fizio is listening, 96, 966. Well, I wouldn't be going there. I wouldn't be, we're wanting to go to him or her with a calf strain. No. No. No. Which one, Bloom got caught?

Bloom got done, but that was multiple people. Did they go to? No. I think it's one. I thought there was Copycat Blooms because they got the Blum and then some more Blooms popped up. Yeah. Now, how did...

966, what's your town's number one graffiti guy? And I always assumed... We've got a random Bloom get around, though, multi-city. Yeah, I think he went to the Waikato maybe. My car. Yeah. He was identified as Sean Evan Anderson Ottie. Gee, that's a nuffle.

Yeah, it is. They reckon he caused $1.1 million in property damage across Auckland. Oh, right. with his tagging. Who was the one that was everywhere in Christchurch post-Earthquate? Got those buildings that they were like... Oh, wouldn't have like four letters in it? Yes.

It did. Yes. Yes. Oh, filth is apparently, that's from 228. Filth's all over Christchurch at the moment. Right. I've just got an article open if you guys are interested in hearing it. It's about how the pyramids will put my aliens.

You guys want to put them to... Oh, you know. I'll read that later. Yeah, I'll shoot it through to the group chat. I think the pyramids would be a good friend. fact of the day fame too one week. They're very fascinating. Maybe next week.

Maybe next week. So many facts. Boyfriend Mike's obsessed with Egypt and whatnot. I spend a lot of my time in museums in the Egypt section. Really? Oh, you haven't mismatched with a museum. Yeah, yeah.

Does he take too long a museum? No, no, no, we've got a good tempo. Okay. But we linger in Egypt. Right. Whereas I'm lingering, you know, and sort of, I don't know. Katie's just... Weird stuffed animals.

She's just driven past pork. Oh, okay. Yeah, right. Pork's a pretty big. Yeah, nice. So apparently that Canterbury police arrested a 23-year-old North Canterbury man in December 2025. Yeah. Who they say left more than 500 graffiti tags across Kikota, Canterbury and Dunedin.

But it doesn't say which... I hope he didn't graffiti any seals. Right. Well, we've really talked about a lot in this one break. Pyramids, criminals, pork. Graffiti. Graffiti. Physiose.

Spout with any. Boyfriends. Physio. museums. It all kind of ties together though, isn't it? It does, yeah. France. Yeah, my French speaking, England. This was truly a break for everyone. It was right at the top of the break. Yeah, wow.

Play Z-M's Flash for an haley. Silly little polis, do you set a buffer alarm? Now, this isn't a backup alarm. This isn't where you have to get up at 7.30, so you set an alarm for 7.30, 7.35, 7.35, 739, etc. This is an alarm where you have to get up at 7.30, but you chuck one. at 7.15 just to sort of, oh my God. Yeah, it's into the wake-up. People need to grow up.

You set one alarm and you get the, and you go about your day. I love it. And then you have a beautiful sleep right up until you wake up. Nothing about my sleep is better. No. I love a, I have a 425 that's like, and then my 430 is like, get out.

And then everyone afterwards is like, but the 425 is lovely. Meanwhile, the boyfriend in bed next year is like, shoot me in the face. The boyfriend in bed next to me this morning really received the wrath of the whole house lights on I'm throwing things looking for my car keys. Because if my day's going to be ruined, boy, I'm going to ruin his too.

Take everybody down. Yeah. Well, 46% of people always set a buffer alarm. That's... 39% don't in 15 sometimes depending on occasion. No. So every morning nearly half people are setting a buffer alarm. Before they need to get up, rather than back up.

I wonder how many people just wake up when they wake up. Oh, that'd be nice. Can you imagine a life? Well, that used to be our life, didn't it, when we worked afternoons? But I reckon what time would you have to be in the afternoon? What lunchtime? There'd be like a part of me that would still have to sit in alarm. Just like, you know, if I got used to, like 10 a.m. 10.30, you're like, oh.

Sometimes the morning would slip away on you. Yeah. You know? You're like, Christ. It's 11. Yeah. I've been in bed all day. I've been in bed all day.

I feel terrible. And this, you couldn't even do. Berm stroll back then. No. Berm strolling wasn't a thing. What were we doing in bed? Heaven. Constant.

Taylor, you remember Taylor our snoring gay? Yes. Still found laugh? We actually would have to get a 9-6-9-6 on that. He hasn't mentioned that. He said, no, I have one alarm, and if I snore through it, I won't be going to work. Nice. His snoring can be so powerful.

He just gets up. He'll snore through work. Goes to work. I love it. All snores all day long. All snores all day long. He said, sorry, I didn't come out. Zach said, we're not all psychos like Fletch that just use one and say,

oh my God, just get up, it's not that hard. My life is hard, Fletch. He just said that. He did just say that. Yeah. But also, just get up, Zach, and go to bed earlier. Let's get that sleep. It's so important to heal the body.

That's actually, that's all been debunked. What time did you get to bed last night? No, nine o'clock. Nine o'clock. You just left the nine for me. Not bad. Okay. But usually, yeah, 10, 10.30.

Yeah. Renee said, I don't even use an alarm. The day simply begins when I wake up. I've only had to get ready in a panic once this year so far. Touch wood, that's the only time. Oh, my gosh. Lovely. What is your set up?

What is your life set up? Driggins are no curtains. God, I wish I was... You know, some people are in no curtains, so they just get up when the sun comes up. Maybe if you live in the middle of nowhere, but if you live in a city environment, that's not good. I'd love a no curtains wake up, yeah. You've got to sleep in a really dark room. I don't like a no curtains wake up, because especially this time of the year.

Well, just before daylight, so when it was the sun was up at a bloody five, 30. Yeah, true actually. You don't get any sort of sleep in. Anna said, I set my alarm five minutes early every morning just for my cat, sassy smurf. The second she hears that she comes trotting in for her morning snuggles, pering her little heart out. Five extra minutes of cuddles in the biggest purrs before I have to get up. It was honestly my favourite part of the day. Yeah, that's nice. How is that cat not like, feed me, feed me, feed me.

Yeah, rolly will jump on like faces to be like, like pretend cuddles, no I want food. Jack, I used to when I had a sleep divorce, but now I'm not allowed one. So he was sleeping on a separate spot for the partner, but now they're back in one bed. He's not allowed a buffer alarm. Oh. Did you see Matthew McConaughey saying that the key to his happy relationship as a queen bed? What?

He was like, the death of marriages went, because I've got a California king. I agree. I agree. Ew. You know, way for me. I agree. I've got a king. Touch me.

I've got a California. I've got the biggest one you can get. I've got a king at home. My girlfriend's beds are queen and it's nicer. No, it's not. Yeah, but she looks like someone who'd be like, sleep, like, pretty. I'm like, get out. I don't touch me.

She's spreading out. She sleeps like, she looks like, sometimes she looks a bit dead. Perfect. When she's asleep, I'm like, she's dead. I'm going to get blamed for this. My boyfriend's very aware that I'm asleep. Right.

You're like, wow. She's like peaceful, quiet on her side. Yeah, dead. I was just like, put a mirror under the. the nose, see if there's any connotation. I used to be a real sicker. I used to set an alarm at 2.30 each day. I would get up at 5.30 a.m.

because I permanently wanted the feeling of checking my clock and thinking, hell yes, still three hours of sleep to go. I get it. Why would you do that, Ash? That's a weird. Eventually it messed with my sleep pattern and I was waking up looking up on control every day, so I had to stop. So they were setting an alarm at 2 o'clock.

So I'd wake up and be like, how yeah, three more hours? I kind of get it, because it is the best feeling. No, that's insane. When you open your eyes, you look over, you're like, oh my God, yes. Yeah. Hell no, if you do, you're not sleeping next to me, get out of my life. So little poll, you've said a buffer alarm. 46% of you always do.

Play ZN. Fletch for him. Just sending an apology message to my boyfriend for poisoning his morning with my toxic behaviour. That's nice, though. You know, as long as you can acknowledge that... Yeah, I'm learning. You're the problem. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I am learning. I was in a bad mood. I was in bad mood. And I think it all started yesterday when I was out in the garage. Oh, I've got some updates to show you. I did well in the garage yesterday. No, she's a demolition queen. I know.

Yesterday, oh my God, I'm really, I'm strong. And I'm an electrician. More on that later. So yesterday, you know, I'm having an issue with my neighbours, two dogs. They're really, really loud. Yesterday they were absolutely going nuts. And I was like, oh, my God. And I've been filling in this form for the council.

but that's like a dog log. Officially, I've got council now. I'm filled in a dog log. Yeah, yeah. And the only problem was I was like not home a lot last week. So I was like, run them and I was like, can I do a fresh dog log so you get a real picture of it? Yeah. So this is where you write how loud it was?

Time length of barking, which dog was barking, how long. Can you tell the difference? The two dogs barking? Yeah, yeah. One of them is, oh, oh, oh, oh. And one of them is, oh, oh, wow. Oh, two different breasts. But look what's been added to the mix.

Oh, I hope I don't swear in this video if I do. What's that? Chickens. Is there a chicken log on the council website? How loud are they? Whose chickens are they? Same people. Oh, yeah, same people, mate.

How many chickens do you reckon there are? Three. Okay, you're allowed to stick something. Well, I'm going to buy three chickens, put them in and then get them confiscated. I'm done. Anyway, so yesterday it was too much And remember I bought one of those dog High frequency noise things

And I put it on my side to try to get to them And it had no effect It just wasn't working So I said to the woman on the phone yesterday at the council You know I bought this thing She's like, that shouldn't be your responsibility though You know, we'll get them, we'll give them some tips on how And I hear this neighbour and she's a mad bitch

So it's not going to work Oh, quiet. That's her effort and I just keep... What did she say? Oh, quiet. Oh. And I'm the one at the back from my deck being like, quiet, shut up.

Do you know, my friend who had the barking dogs I used to, I was very rarely at his house but he used to drive me nuts and the owner's excuse was that the dog was like, how did she put it? She used the R word, I won't... Oh, okay. It was chromosonally challenged.

Yeah, because I was like, that's bullshit excuse and I looked over. I was like, oh. Oh, maybe. Oh, was it? Oh, interesting. And now it's like, you're the asshole. You know what I'm saying?

Shut that dog up. So what I did yesterday, even though I spent $278 online on two different ultrasonic bark control devices because it doesn't work from my end. And what she's doing doesn't work either. And when they arrive, I'm just going to put them in their mailbox and say, please put these on your fence. Please put them on your side of the property. so we can get to the bottom of this. I'm just going to see how it's received.

Well, these ones are really good. That's why it was $278. But you don't know she's going to use them. She could just tell you to pass off and chuck them back over the fence. Yeah, yeah. Well, she can do that. Then I'll mount them on the top of your fence. Or I'll get dressed up in all black.

Yeah. And I'll cross the fence line at night and I'll screw them somewhere to the house. Just like in the middle of the night. Yeah. This is like the, because the council process to get. the dogs being quiet is really long. So for now I'm like, here you go. I've put the money in.

You install them on your side and we'll see how that goes. As for the chickens. I'm going to start coming out with some salt and pepper. No, they kind of come out every like as we head towards summer, but there's new more of one now. When are they when the winter comes? I don't care. Being quiet.

Being quiet. I've got chicken questions. Like, this is insanity. The chicken noise is. almost worse than the dog noise, but I can't sort of bring up chickens now. I've got to what are they doing? Making more chickens. This does explain your mood.

That's what the chickens sound like when they lay eggs. This does explain your mood when you arrived at work this morning. Oh, it's just, the day started off so badly. And now I know, if I go home after this bad start to my day and it that might be it for me.

But God knows what will happen when I snap. The ZN Podcast Network. Play ZN's Fletch Fawn and Haley. On the unmoderated comment section, this is the Top Six. Well, I was reading an article about Bill Gates and his thoughts on AI causing a billion debts, but TMZ wanted me to guess which celebrity owns these sexy legs. And they pushed me through to the next article.

You've been distracted. Who owns the legs? Yeah. Some great legs in there. Yeah. I've gone back to the Bill Gates article, though. Legs, okay. It can be looked at later.

This is serious. Good boy. Bill Gates has said he believes, when he was talking to meet the press, he believes that AI could be so powerful in moments that it would drive events to cause a billion debts. He said it's exponentially increasing in power all the time. There's been multiple cases of it hacking other places without being told to. She's all out of water.

She's all out of water. Yeah, it did. But also as a planet with kind of a, you know, got too much of us. and we're kind of taking a toll on the planet. Well, eight... Is it terrible of a billion of us shuffled off? Eight billion is the current? Around that.

It's a lot, isn't it? Bags not. Bags up. Oh, damn it. You're laughing. No, it's one and eight. So if anybody listening was slower than that? We were pretty quick.

96, 96, did you beat me? Yeah. If not. Tata. Top six ways not to be one of the one billion killed by AI. Number six on the list, pleases and thank yous. I'm always kind to AI. I'm always pleases and thank you.

Right. names, all sorts. I've told it off quite a bit in the recent times. Claude, I, please and thank you. I've very rarely used Google Gemini, but I'm quite rude to Google Gemini. I like Gemini, yeah. There's no pleasers and thank you's there. I don't

see it. Anyway, pleases and thank you. It's number five on the list of the top six ways to not be one of the one billion killed by AI. Ask it all about your body problems. Oh, I do this. This is weird. Oh, sore back. So, because it'll see you as a weak, pathetic excuse you're a human that's not a physical threat to it. So it'll just leave you be.

Or it could just be like, gas that one. Gas this one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a waste of resource. Strong to survive. Right, they don't want the weak. They don't want, you know,

they don't want a planet full of John Connors. Yeah, true. Trying to take them down. They want weak little nerds. Yeah, and I'll be like, this one's mentally weak as well, which is great. Yeah, perfect.

We'll keep them around, just torture it. She's sick, too. She uses anxiety to power our human batteries. Yeah, and her spelling's terrible. Yeah, that's all thanks to me. I was telling her how to spell things right. the whole time. Number four on the list of the top six ways not to be one of the one billion killed by AI.

Turn off the tap when you're brushing your teeth so you can save water for the sweet, sweet AI overlords. God, they're going to need some water. They're going to need water. They're going to need water. They're going to need to melt the ice caps, I reckon get a bit more water out and about. That's a great idea. I can see nothing. Get down to Antarctica. What can go wrong? Give those a big melt.

Number three on the list of the top six ways not to be one billion killed by AI. Go back to cassettes. Yeah. The PlayStation 1. No phones. Film cameras and in the Encyclopedia Britannica, if you need something. It's got everything you need. And a recipe book. Yeah, lovely.

Go fully offline. Number two on the list of the top six ways not to be one of the one billion killed by AI. Be a billionaire. Yeah. Then you've got your underground bunkers, you've got your spaceships, you can shoot off up into space. I'm going to need a sub-top-six on how to become a billionaire. Tomorrow, join me for a failure. I'll tell you the quickest way to become a billionaire.

And number one on the list of the top six ways, not to be killed by a A-I tin foil clothes. Can't see through them. Okay. Can't see through. Remember in Jurassic Park? And they were like, don't move. The T-Rex can only see you when you're moving.

Wrap yourself in tin foil. Perfectly still. AI won't be able to find you. But my thighs touch. And so when I walk, the tin foil will be like, stay still. Stay still. When AI is about.

Okay. That is today's top. Play Z-N. Splashhorn and Haley. I feel like these stats may be a little screwy, if I may say. This is a super. that was done out of the UK looking at office workers

and the reasons why they've been taking increased stress leave. Now, would that come under sick leave? Like you'd take mental health leave as part of your sick leave? Yeah. Because ours isn't like separated. You've got your sick leave, your annual leave. Or you're like, I don't want to be here leave. Do they just lump it under sick days?

Yeah, that's what I would think. Stress isn't really a category we have here. One of the main reasons people taking stress leave, 24% of people have taken time off because of noise-related stress from the office it's out. Oh, okay. Now, it's hard for us because our office. We are the noise. It's our job to be the noise.

You were simply adopted the noise. We were born into it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We are the noise. We make the noise. And then when we're not making noise with our mouths, the music makes the noise. Yes. And then often, we're having fun and we just make noise.

But producer girlies, you head into the office once we're gone. to do the real Mahi of the day. Is it noisy in there? Yeah, I would say we've got a unique office because the radio is playing and it's purposefully playing. So do you go, in what station are you listening to? I choose a coast, actually,

and it's crazy that you stole butter from my favourite announcer. Don't, she's not here. But yeah, we have Zidim playing out here, and if we go off here, man, you feel it. Yeah, right. There's a rumble in the office. Yeah.

Do you find it hard to concentrate, Carwan? Yes, yes. Look, before I did this job, I used to work in an office job out there, and so I got very good at blocking out the radio. But now my job, I can't just block you guys out. Like, I really should be listening to what you're saying. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

It does help. Yeah. You ever choose to block us out. We also have a content creating office. So quite often there's TikToks and there's yelling and there's filming. Wait, oh, you mean the people in the office are kind? I thought you mean there's a specific office for content creating. I was like, Christ, every a punishing office, I.

No. So, yeah. Hi guys, join me tonight as I have my lunch. Get ready with me. That's my system it. You're never a little bit. I'm just going to have a cado in it. Yeah.

So there's a few times where I'll swap from an air pod to a noise cancelling headphone out there. Yeah. Well, yeah, I think if I worked in an office environment, I would have great noise cancelling headphones. Yeah, it can be a lot. I think, I mean, I have friends that I'm not, because I can be really sensitive to noise, but it depends on my mood. Like I can, like, hold it, but sometimes I'm just like, holy moly, it's too much, and it makes you feel uncomfortable. So 32% of people said it caused them to do worse work, missed deadlines, because it's too loud in the bloody office.

26% of people snap at colleagues at least once a month to be quiet. I reckon I'd be that loud on the phone guy in the office if I worked in an office. Oh yeah. Just because I'm so dead. Gatay, good. Gathe. How are you? Cheers.

Yeah, right. I'm wondering if you had a chance to look over the... How are you shagger? Yeah, yeah. 23% say noise cancelling headphones aren't an option for them. Like maybe they work in a workplace where... They're allowed them. Or you've got to stay a tune.

Like an ER maybe. I saw a chef the other day in the kitchen because it was one of those open kitchens at like a cafe and he had noise cancelling headphones on. Oh yeah. I was like, that's weird, eh? Yeah, because you need to hear them saying on your left, chef coming through, chef.

Yeah, behind hot. Yeah, she's hot. Cornering, cornering. I think some work environments it would be like quite anti-social. Yeah. Like if you were like, right, I'm locking in and put my headphones on and get this thing done

but if you work in a more of a collaborative space and you're just like not wanting to listen to anyone and put your headphones in. You look a bit rude. What if you hear, what if you hear a noise and then you can't never unhear the noise? What do you mean? You know, like if you hear it like a wh-l-oh.

Oh yeah. And that's like that's all you ever hear from eternity every time you step into the office. Like your neighbour's dogs. Yeah, or I've got a drip. Yes. And I see, I was like, I think there's a drip in this house. Oh, like if you ever go to sleep in a hotel

or you hear the fridge or a dripping shower. A drip. trip. That just drives me nuts. Yeah. I heard a trip the other day at my house and I was like, well, it's on the market. Like, I'm just not, what am I going to do? What was I?

Where was I the other day? And the people were just working and there was just this noise and it was just constant. They might have like, a door might have been left open or something. It was just constantly like, teat, teat, I was just like, how? And I was in a paint shop the other day and it's right beside the train lines. I hope it was. Yes, it was. Thank you.

Thank you for asking. I love the trains. But now because there's increased trains, like every two minutes, it was ding, ding, ding, ding, Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding I used to live at the end of a cul-de-sac That was a train thing And it was sort of a novelty for a bit And then you're like

My body's learning the schedule That's kind of nice But ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding Designed to be annoying And grab your attention Well the world's noisy What are you going to take a day off every day Dude dude?

Maybe The world is noisy The world's noisy Protect your peace I'm just out here protecting my piece The world is noisy, protective piece. The world is noisy

get some good headphones. Yeah, actually just invest in some good headphones. The ZDM Podcast Network. What's going on? ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. Now, for those that don't know, Haley, you've written a movie.

Well, I've co-written a movie. Co-written. With some friends of mine, yes. And it's shot. It's been shot. I don't know how much I'm allowed to say. Stars Amelia Clark. It's been directed by,

and co-written by my friend James Ashcroft, who's just worked with Robert De Niro. And it's, we'll hopefully be out next year. This is exciting. It's not a comedy. It's the weirdest thing. It's a dark, like, thrillery horror. Right.

Yeah. Well, so there's been. In which Millie Clark was a worm all along. And it turns out at the end, she's been living out and around. Yeah. So well because she was a worm in Cluel. Do you know, if this film doesn't do well, you're going to be the reason. No one's going to be.

Yeah, no one's story. They're going to take it to focus groups. You know how they do screenings. this to see what the audience thinks. And even Americans will be like, hey man, I thought they were a worm. How would she be able to live down there so long if she were not a worm?

She wasn't a worm, man. I read the line. I asked questions around how that actually works if she's not a worm. Well, there has been a study done that looked at 200,000 films. She's always. The last 30 years.

And it found that films written by women with no women director posted on investment 25% higher than male only films. But there's never been a film that's been written by and directed by a woman that has ever cracked the top 1% of production budgets. Oh yeah, yeah, right. Assuming that wasn't written by her?

Yeah, yeah, good a girl. Was it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's a one-stop shop. Maybe they missed that one. But what does it mean by 1% of production budgets? Do know, like the top. As in profits.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Compared to other budgets and other movies. Yeah, maybe. Does it cite any woman written movies that have done really well? Because you said women, but men directed it. Yeah, women write it because we've got the heart. Yeah. And the emotional sensitivity and the men direct it because they get more money.

Yes. So within all the financial data examine, not one film directed by a woman alone or paired with a woman writer ever crack the top 1% of the budgets across the entire 30 years that they looked at. God, this felt like a win for women when you started. It does seem like. But you wrote, you didn't direct.

But you co-wrote. Co-wrote with men though. But we could say, woman in the writing team, but not in the directing team, that is the recipe we have on our hands. James a man, director. Yeah, yeah, exactly. A lady woman co-riding. So this could bode well for me?

Could bode well. Am I about to become, dare I say, a global sensation? I mean, it depends how the worm thing lands. Well, they'll say, what's your next move? And I'll be like, it's a follow-up. Guess what? So explain how she lived down there so long. She was a worm all along.

It's the same story, but from a different perspective. Whose perspective? The worms. But she is the worm. The worms that she turned her back on the worms. I'm not one of you. Yeah, I'm a human. I'm not one of you filthy worms.

And they're like, She was like, oh my God. Subtitles. Why can I understand you? Black and white, subtitles. Yeah, why can I understand you? Because you're a worm. What?

Your father was a worm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Your mother fell in love with a worm and she couldn't tell anyone because it was a very... Because it would be ridiculous for a male worm to impregnate a female human, but it's perfectly reasonable for a male worm to impregnate a female human.

So, budgets, someone's just clarifying, yes, budgets meaning the amount of money they've been given to make the film rather than the problem. And they don't get given as much as the men. So Barbie doesn't get given as much because they're like, well, she'll probably go and blow it all on shoes. Yes, exactly. She'll probably blow it all on flowers.

Yeah, it's crazy. But yeah, that is. So I've got, I'm part of a good recipe. Yes, so fingers crossed. For success. I just want to clarify she's not a worm all along. That's a spoiler, but I just want you to know. I know, sorry, Carl and I ruined the end of the movie.

We'll see. Or am I tricking you? Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Forin and Haley Rescued by emergency services. Maybe you got stuck. Wedged. I, I, I,

Trap. Personally would like to stare at towards the quirky or funnier stories Rather than, you know, I flipped my car into a ravine. Oh, no, it was filling up with water. A raevine, I do apologize, I've mispronounce there. It's Rayvine. It's Rayvine, not ravine. Such an old reference.

Such an old in-joke that no one would understand, Remember, that's all right. Just to fill in the gap there, it's going to drive me nuts if I don't fill in the gap, a news reader was reading a story about a ravine and called it a rvine. Her car toppled into a ravine. What? It's good stuff.

You know, they're only human. Newsreaders are only human too, and sometimes they haven't heard words. Queen Elizabeth 3. I mean, we've lived through it all. We love it. Yeah. Quai Street.

Excuse me. News readers make mistakes. Labton Quay. Lambton Quay. That's how I said it. That news readers make mistakes. Yeah, they're only human. They do.

They're people too. If it's Lambden Key, it should be spelled K-E-Y. So on the lighter end of things, when did emergency services have to rescue you? Maybe you were trapped or stuck somewhere? This is a good one and a bit of a classic. It's happened to my daughter, a teenager squeezed into the baby swing. Now, the baby swing is the one with the legs and the chain on the front, and you put the legs through, and the baby goes in, so it holds the baby.

Because I don't know if you guys know this, babies are useless. Like, they know nothing. They are useless at a bunch of stuff. They're useless at sleeping. They're useless at eating. They can't even eat themselves. They have to have the moly up food because they can't chew properly. I know.

Or they have to get them on the breast. Yeah. Losers. And then one thing they also can't do is go on a swing because they'd top heavy in the head and they'll topple off and get brain damage. So it'd be braced in. Yeah. It'd be braced in.

Couldn't get out. No. Had it been cut out by the firefighters. So embarrassing. What, with the jaws of life? Or do they have one of those... or just a hacksaw? A little Rayobi thing that you've got for your renaos.

Yeah, yeah, the renovator. Imagine though, getting that by the crotch, you'd be like, please, please, please. I reckon I'd be cut out by the sides. Sides, yeah, right. I'd ask him to cut out by the sides. I'd rather have a gash on my thigh than take one to the jumps. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Losing an inch or two, you know, devastating. A non-medical circumcision of stuff. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Imagine you're going to circumciseise of the renovator. I don't know, it took the whole head. Embarrassing, though, because then everyone's filming you're getting rescued by the fire department. It's like when people get their heads stuck between two rails. I love that because it like goes in, but then your ears just don't even going out.

You've gaffed yourself. Okay, well, we want you to call us, 0800 dials at M, text us, 9-696. The goofy or the better, when have you had to have been rescued by emergency services? Wow. We asked for some on the comical side of things. We've got those, but we've also got crazy rescue stories coming in this way. We want to know when you've had to be rescued, cut out of. By emergency services because our, attention.

teenager thought she'd fit into a swing. He, sorry, into a child swing. Legs went in, legs wouldn't come out. Megan has also messaged with the exact same story. Drunk, went to the park, hopped into a metal child swing. Thunder thick, I will say. Unable to dislodge. Fire surface is required to soap me up and slide me out.

Oh. I hope your friends have a lot of video of us. I've got a sexy firefighter to soap you up and slip you out. slide out my thick size. Kelly, when did you have to be rescued by emergency services? Oh, morning, guys. Morning. It was about 13 of us going through a burlesque dance lesson.

Oh. We looked in the lift and we went 12 people. There's two little ones. Two short people, we call one big person. We were really wrong. We got stuck in the lift. The fire service had to come and get us out. But best 10s night ever

because we didn't have to plan for the fireman. show up. Yeah, baby, that's a free amount. Yeah, but did they take off their clothes? Sadly, no. I did give them some of my pegs for the pegs game, the woman who played that before, and they looked very confused. Yeah, right.

Do you know, at the moment, they're screaming out for more funding, the fire service? They should actually think about doing hen stoo's as like... You just get a little, like... J.B.L. Boom thing, put on some genuine. Yeah. You know, I think the woman would go to them as well. Exactly. And then if there's a fire, they just leave. Professional firefighters.

They would be setting our houses ablaze left front and sent her. Whoops, drop a match. Drop a match. Kelly, thank you. Let's go to Tegan. Teigen. Tegan, when did you have to be rescued by emergency services? Morning, guys.

Morning. It wasn't actually me. It was my sister. So about 15 years ago, we went on a road trip, and we were in the middle of nowhere on the way to Antarctica. We all used this public restroom. and then she went last and she got locked in. Oh.

We had to wait for about an hour and a half for someone to come and remove the roof of the public bathroom to jump in and break the lock to let her out. What? Hey, what happened there? How did everybody else use it? And she got locked in so badly they had to go through the roof. We have no idea.

My dad, like, crawled under to try and break it and we just, yeah, we couldn't get it open. Oh, my gosh. It's hilarious. But she didn't think so. No. Funny now, though, to her? I think so

I hope We feel laugh about it Got in that smell Ugh Like the whole thing Yuck Yuck Tegan thank you

Some messages My old work colleague Got a leaf blower Stuck to her head I had to call the ambulance And the fire brigade That would make you day A leaf blower

So what Was it a sucker But they suck in the side So do you think the hair got caught And just Maybe Yeah Yeah

So the back of a hair dryer It sucks And sometimes It's caught in Yeah Elizabeth Taylor messaged in. The Elizabeth Taylor. The Elizabeth Taylor.

That's crazy. Perveyor of perfumes and other things. Is Elizabeth Taylor dead? Yep. Yeah. Long dead? Long dead? No.

Medium dead. If we can get a quick take there on Elizabeth Taylor, medium dead. I'd say long dead 2011. Yeah, long dead. That's long dead. Medium dead up to the last five. Five.

Yeah, I agree. Recently deceased last six months. Yeah. Steve Irwin, long dead. Long dead. Heath Ledger, sadly. Long dead. Robert Williams, sadly, long dead.

Hatler? Yeah, long dead. Long. Hang on, I was going to Google. Claire Patra? Pharaoh of Egypt. Ancient dead. Ancient dead.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. T-Rex? Jurassic dead. Yeah. Actually, can you just give me a quick check what period did the T-Rex live? And I'd hate to say Jurassic did it if it was actually critical. The T-Rex live in.

Quite right, we do not lie on the show. No, but that was what we're wrong enough. Named Jurassician. Mastrician dead. Mastrician dead. Late Cretaceous period. Late Cretaceous dead. So, apologise, because you said,

Oh, Jurassic Park. You've got so many paleontologists that listen to the show. We do. Sorry. Down there in St. Baths. Yeah. Getting the fossils. St. Bathins.

Slabs who died this year, because we'd say recently dead. Dolly pardon? Recently dead. Deceased. Donnelly Pah. We would talk soon about the VMAs and the tribute to her. Tim Carly, Catherine O'Hara. Recently dead.

Oh, recently dead. My papa was rescued by the Westpac helicopter after being run over by a golf cart. My pop. How did he get under that? Do you think he got out of his own golf cart? Didn't apply the break. Probably went down the hill to play a shot and the golf cart just tanked him.

What do you think some means? No, I reckon he slept with someone's wife at the retirement home and he was in there being like, you bastard. If we could get a follow up there if Papa ran himself over. I reckon it was some other. their old mate. They couldn't find the break? Yeah, they couldn't find the break.

I was drunk and put a plastic kettle on an electric element on a hotel in Christchurch. Then I fell asleep and the smoke filled the room. I had to be rescued. The hotel almost burned down. It wasn't funny, but the firefighters came and they made fun of me. They rescued me. Okay.

Just to follow up on Pop there on the golf course, it was an old mate parked literally on top of them. Great. Ran him over, panicked, parked on top of them. Yeah. Oh, God. A friend of mine had to be rescued by the police. Did you read this? No.

She was a teenager at home alone. She heard a robber rustling in the bushes outside her house if she called the police. The cops arrived to help her. It was a plastic bag caught in a tree. That's those plastic bags and stuff. That's why Jacinda banned them. They're just confusing.

You just think that it's a robber in the bush. Yeah. Plastic bags? Recently deceased. Yeah, recently. No, would you? Within the last five years, it might be over five years now.

Long dead. Long dead. I did like recently. and it was nice being in Europe. It was obviously very lovely being there. Best bit about Europe, people are like, Arc de Triomp, Coliseum. They haven't got rid of the real thick plastic shopping bags.

Tell you what, man. When your Aparole Spritz turns up and you're like, is that a plastic straw? It's nice. It's actually nice. I'm going to take my time with this beverage as my straw is not slightly disintegrating into it. Don't lie and say you took your time with an Aparol Spritz.

No, well, I just, I wasn't worried. Yeah, didn't do it in one continuous gulp Through the paper straw Three gulps I ran over myself with my own car In the middle of the whops Had to crawl three kilometres To get reception to call an ambulance

To come and rescue me How'd you run off using in our car? Don't know Get out of the car Didn't put in park Yeah and then ran over Maybe the quick follow up there 330

Did the car continue down into a rewind Or did it stop on top of you Like why wouldn't you drive your car I'm imagining the car Yeah. It is one of my dreams to push a car off a glove. Is it? Did you read the one about the friend

who got stuck in one of those circle bike stands? No. And they got at the fire service had to turn up and grease him out as well. What? You know those circle bikes stands? Yeah. They're all around Auckland.

He got wedged in one of those and he'd get greased out. It's so shame. And then the shoulders went through, I'm imagining a curvacious gentleman. Yeah. Shoulders went through, gaffed through the top. A broad lab.

And then a nice pig fat dumpy. Got, yeah, nice piton, cuttong, cut off. Can you ask what kind of, maybe there's some firefighters listening, what kind of grease do they use? Big pig fat. Lard. It's lard. They got a new world.

Do they have a tub of lard in the fire engine? Yeah. What grease do they use? Crimelter. Yum, to make those ice bubble. Ricey cups. Yeah. The Fletchborn and Haley, big pod.

Well, she won best new artist. She sure does. Did she? She sure did at the Vimmers, the Video Music Awards. That happened last night. Hoped it, hosted by Snoop Dog, who by the way, apparently did a really good job. I didn't watch the whole thing. Gosh, I'm proud of him.

He did a good job. He's come along. I might comment on his Instagram letting him know I think he's had a fantastic job and I'm very proud of him. That's really good. Can you send it from all of us? That's from all of us. I'll say it's from all of us. Snoop D-O-D-D-D-G.

So we had the audience singing like gin and juice and drop it like it's hot. He was funny, it was charming and everything. Yes, he and Aspiro, one new artist. There were some key moments. Shall we start with the sad? Oh, yeah. This is Casey Musgraves doing a beautiful dedication to Dolly Parton. I mean, people don't know.

She wrote this song. A lot of people don't know she wrote this song. They think it's Whitney. They think it's Whitney's song. The way Casey did it is definitely more in the style of Dolly's version, which is very soft and sweet. It's very beautiful. But poor Dolly, she's dead.

She is recently dead. Recently dead. Now, Madonna opened with quite an iconic performance. Here she is with Sabrina Carpenter. Oh, they're small? Do you know they're the same height? They're tiny. Madonna and Sabrina.

Yeah, yeah, the same height. Sabrina's like five foot. Yeah, they were standing next to each other. And then they were presenting an award later in the night. And Madonna said something that she was like, I'm Madonna. and I had to slide into Sabrina Carpenter's DMs to get this co-lab going

because her agents, Madonna's people were talking to Sabrina's people and apparently Sabrina's people were too slow. So she was like, screw this. Too much far around. I'm Madonna. I'm Madonna for God's sake. So she went in and slipped into the DMs

and made it happen and Sabrina like, oh, it's it immediately because you don't ignore Madonna. Especially if it's Madonna blue tick. Because you fell for that scam with Madonna. Yeah, I did Madonna no blue tick. God I sent her thousands of it. of dollars. Do you know Madonna follows,

we've talked about this before, Madonna follows like a few, like a couple of people on Twitter, one of which is my friend Sam. Why? I know. It's so weird. I know.

It's so weird. Did he post something funny once? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, okay. And she followed him. Wow. It's the weirdest thing. Okay.

Anyway, and performance of the night, Ray. She's like a great voice, a great voice. She was just absolutely, amazing. It was a great VMA's performance. She did like this with a combo of another song, but this was the one that literally every single

artist was up out of their seat. Now Taylor Swift was there, didn't perform, debuted a new music video starring Dakota Johnson. There's a really funny moment though where Taylor Swift is presenting. She got that like kind of a lifetime acknowledgement sort of thing. No lifetime thing. A general career acknowledgement thing and they cut to Charlie XXX

in the audience. Brilliant. Not a friendly stare. Brilliant. Brilliant. Brilliant. Charlie X-XX is there and she's got her like Brad energy on. She's like sat back like this and she's just very casually dressed

and like jeans and a top of me she's just like... Does she have bitch your wretched and she's clapping like this? I think she's just the bitch which is perfect. Like that's just her energy. Yeah, you do do. But yeah, I think it was a good one.

You know, sometimes you have like a bit of a dud year or anything like that. Yeah, it sounds like an action-packed VMA. Let's just quickly touch on Somba's belly butter and he turned it great outfit, classic kind of like rocks, star, you know? Low-rise jeans

with the gutters out. We've got sort of like Stephen Tyler scarfs everywhere. Bellar buttons really out. Audi Ballet button, unexpectedly. I had an Audi belly button, remember? You recovered, though. That's right, you've got it sucked back in, eh? I got it sucked back in, yeah.

Spiritually, are you still an outy? Like, do you get Phantom Outie? No, I don't have Phantom Outie. 9-6, 9-6, for you an Audi? And is it a source of embarrassment for you? You've ever run your tongue across an Audi? 6-96? Is it like another nipple?

I don't think I've... I don't think it's very rare. Because mine gets sore when I... I think it's quite rare. Mine gets sore when I like just drive a finger in. But I want to... If it was an Audi, could there be an originer sign perhaps? No, I don't think so.

9-6-96. If you've got an outy belly button... Suggesting it as a silly little pole, but I just don't think enough people have Audi belly buttons. It's... It's probably rarer than a left hand. Yeah, I said to... I remember when my daughters were born,

I said, what are the chances of an Audi belly button? Because did you do the chops? Because it's not actually down to, everyone's like you chopped it too far away. No, it's not. You chop it miles away. It falls off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she was like, it'll be low.

Right. Yeah, see, that's the thing? And then you spend all their early life just, you're poking it back in. Well, if you do have an out of the belly button. Yeah, you've got a celebrity spokesperson now. In somber. In somber. With a proud outy.

Currently pregnant with an outty. Oh, no, but they pop. Yeah, they pop out when you're pregnant. Someone's it's hauntingly soft. Hauntingly soft there from 8-5, 8. Ooh. My daughter has an out of you. Sorry to ooh.

I had one. I can't remember it being hauntingly soft. You see, you're one of those people way that used to be one thing. Yeah. And then it's like, ugh. Like, what are you taking? Pull up the ladder behind you.

You know, and then gets rich and it was like, poor people. Or gets on the jabs and like, oh, fat people. Fat people. You go to the gym. Why don't you go to the gym and need to sell it? I had an Audi till I was 18, then it randomly popped itself in.

My daughter has an Audi, the whole family had inies. It's quite prominent. My family kept telling me it's how we cut the umbilical cord, but the doctors have told me that's not true. It's not, yeah. I've got like an in-in-y. Mine's so deep.

It's a deep in-in-y. You could store gold in there. My daughter has a half-in-half out, like an island, looks odd. Oh, sort of like a coral atoll. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mine's slightly outy, kind of looked like a cat's asshole, says Jamie. Okay. Now, we won't have that language used on the show, please, Jane.

Going forward. Jamie's puckered belly-button assholes. Who plays Z-N's flesh-borne and haley. We were just counting down how many days till Christmas. How many work days to go until it's Christmas? 60 or so. Yeah, we're not looking forward to it. Gosh, no.

Don't take us away. Please, don't we just have a sleep in. No, no, no, no. No, that's so mean. I've actually got permission to speak about this. I said permission to speak about this tomorrow, and my girlfriend Amy said permission granted. That's nice.

I said, cup corn car. Capcomca. Oh, no, you're a man, you have to do it short. Capcomca. Yeah. So she doesn't speak Thai She's like, what are you talking about? She's not Thai.

She's not Thai. She's a mystery. Yeah. Stay tuned. She's a toothbrush destroyer. Now I mean this in the fact that we were food shopping and I said, I needed a new toothbrush

and I said, and to be honest, you do too because I'd seen hers was a little bit flayed. Flayed. A little, you sent photos to the group chat. Oh, no, no, no. That one's not even that bad. We haven't even had that one that long. Yeah.

What's that hell? This is doing to them. So we bought a two pack. Yeah. So I knew that both of those toothbrushes were born on the same day. Yes. And they'd been used the same amount of time. And I was shifting around stuff at my bathroom the other day and I was like,

how have you done this? And the toothbrush is just like, it's one of those toothbrushes with the outer perimeter of bristles. And in the middle, it's got some of those little quarter circles of rubber. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Squeak, squeak, on the teeth. Good for the tongue. Two of those are missing. Yeah.

I'm like, have you swallowed the rubber? Yeah. Are you aware that the rubber's broken off? Yeah. Where, like, I watched it the day, I said, brush your teeth for me. Kink unlocked. Yeah.

And she was doing it, and I was like, she doesn't seem to be doing anything untoward. I reckon she'll be like, because I do this too. It'll be like, I brush my teeth, and then I'll think of something else to do, like a moisturiser or something, and I chew it the whole time.

Because you're holding it in your mouth by biting the bristles. Chewing, chewing, chewing, and then I go back to brush her. She doesn't do that because I do that. I'll start brushing the teeth and then get distracted. And then my tongue will be burning. I'm like, why is that burning? It's because I've had toothpaste in my mouth for an hour. Do you know the worst part about this is then you're like, because I do this.

And my boyfriend will know if I've used his because I was like, oh, God, sorry. I don't know where to put my toothbrush. I've used yours for the last couple of days. He's like, oh, I'm aware. Within two days, he can tell that I've flayed it. Yeah. Just go through the, but I reckon like every fortnight, every three weeks, just get a new one.

I, yeah. Suck it turtles. Or could you just do that thing where you brush your teeth and then put the toothbrush down and back and then go about your thing? No, no, no, no, no, no. I've got to do nine things at once.

Like my father before me and his father before him, we're wanderers when we're brushing her teeth. And it drives the woman in our lives crazy. My mom's constantly like, Ian, bathroom. My mom used to be like, you'll trip up and choke on it. Maybe that's what we want, Mom. Yeah, you don't know me. Maybe we want to be choked, don't you judge me.

I want to know this morning, from you listening, 0,800LZM, what is your partner tearing through? What do they get through way quicker? Because I know a guy I used to be friends with, well, I'm still friends with them, I just haven't seen him for ages. His toenails, and he just burned through socks. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, they last a month or so, and then 40th red beer. You'd always be like snagging sheets and snagging sheets, cutting through things of sheets. Yuck. No, that's that. Maybe you sweat through, maybe you're sweat through. Maybe you ripped through the undies

because you're a scratcher. Yeah, or your hairbrush. Yeah. You know what I mean? You just absolutely like ripping your locks out. The hair brushes. Oh yeah, because they've got the little sticks on the brush.

The bristles with the little beads on top. Yeah. To help not scratch your scalp and people knock those off all the time because they're getting through them. They're rough users. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, so you want to take some calls this morning.

I want to hint through dials at them, texta, 9-6-9-6. Now, if I just say, someone just said what animals are not using electric toothbrush, we've got sensitive gums. We've been through this. Yeah. It's too abrasive. We've got to use a song.

We're soft toothbrush. I think also I think Aletriush is a yuck. I'll go on the record. The goo gets around and the base is always yuck looking. Yeah. And then you've got to have

the PowerPoint in your bathroom. Oh, Haley, you sure your boyfriend's toothbrush gross. Yeah, but you've put... I've had other parts of them in my mouth. You know what I mean? Like, sharing a toothbrush or actually. That's the least of the ways. Yeah.

It's pretty the lowest risk. Yeah. Of everything done. 966. 0800. at Em is the number? What is your partner ripping through at a rapid rate? What is your partner using more than their fissure

of the worlds? Because my girlfriend Amy, she's getting through the toothbrushes. She must push hard. Choose them. Pushes too much. I've watched her brush your tooth. I just think it's a push hard situation. Is she going out? No, she goes around, but she

really gets in there. Must have clean teeth. Very clean teeth. Your gums will be serrated, though. What your partner is tearing through it a rapid rate or not. Now, Sammy, this is you and your partner is, I guess. Tearing through it? Yeah, it's actually me, but it drives my partner, my husband, crazy. Oh, so you're the guilty person here, okay.

It's nice to self-dob, it's good to have awareness. Yeah, I hate reusing socks, so I only use them once, and then I... Sammy! Sammy! What are you? No! A socks not good till it's had a week of wearing a couple of washes. I just hate the fact, like, reusing them and having to wash them and find the pair,

and it's just too much admin. What that? Wait, do you must buy super cheap socks then? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I just get, like, Kmartre's socks. But then it doesn't, wait, if you're just getting all the same socks, it doesn't matter that they're matched as long as they're the right color, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, I don't know. I just, we have a post on. to say what? You need a smacked ass. That'd saw this out. I think we should do a segment on the show where we do, where we call it complimentary therapist.

Yeah. And we send someone with a problem like you to therapy. It's called obsessive-compulsive disorder, I believe. But we don't work in this field. How long has this been a choice for you? Oh, like 15 years. Wow. Oh, my God.

So how much is your weekly budget for socks? Oh, I don't wear a lot of shoes that need socks I probably go through like a couple of three packs a couple of months every second month Wow Oh, okay Right So what is, are you the same size foot as your partner

Could he at least be using them? No No, okay, damn, God What could you do? Maybe look on Pinterest, look at some sock crafts You know what I mean? Or just donate them in the clothing bins at least? No one wants them.

No one wants them. No, it's socks that have been worn. Once. No, but they don't know that. You can't leave a note on the one. Yeah, that's true. One once, they promise. Sammy, thank you.

Alana, what does your partner tear through? He burns through baby powder. On the baby? No, on himself. Right, and so what's he just powdering himself in the groin or something?

Was it where it was? But what's about him? Just everywhere. I don't know, he seems to think that it helps him sweat so much. I always think it would make a paste. Yeah, like a sweaty paste. Like a groin?

Is he wet up the groin? Usually? So, but he does. Where does he do this? Slumpy crotch? Where does he do this baby powdering in the shower? No, just in the bathroom. Like, just most mornings,

sometimes in the evening as well. Is he vacuuming up? Because I'm imagine if he's pouring in. Yeah, that's just a piece. No, that's why she's ringing. Yeah, that's why she's ringing. She's ringing. enough. Wow. That's incredible.

Alana, thank you. Kayla, Kayla, what is your partner tear through? He tears through a lot of milk, normally about two litres a day. Okay, so the three of us tried to sip a milk yesterday. The context of which, through gag. And we were like, it's so

weird, just drinking milk. It's a lot, isn't it? It's a lot, yeah. Yeah, no, with like cereal coffees and then he'll just drink it straight out of the bottle. Wow. Is that an ac? That sounds a bit yuck. But he's, I mean, he always says he's never broken a bone, so it's going to do something different. Yeah, here we are actually sitting here all crumbly.

Yeah, crumbly bone, crumbly bones. Kayla, thank you. Haley, what does your husband tear through? Hello, I think my husband must drink for Listerine because he gets through about a bottle of each. Oh, my goodness, really? He's just gulping it. That's just not. That's how you really get the good coat on the throat, you know.

You got to cope the throat. Swallow it lightly. The goat coat throat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Listerine. What colour can I ask? Because we're a brown family. You couldn't swallow that. Oh, we've just actually bought separate bottles because he's going through it too quickly. So he's a blue guy and I'm a green gal. Oh, okay, right. Does he get sore throats very often?

No, not going to know of. Is he shredded raw? But they say it's bad for your bacteria and stuff because you're killing your... The good and the bad. The good and the bad. Microbiote. Yes. He seems to be healthy otherwise. Okay.

Wow. But just turning through it. I'd have a bit of soda water, you know what I'm? Do you think, though, do you think that if you went to therapy, it would trace back to one person telling him once he had bad breath like years ago? Yes, it's trauma. Oh, I might have to ask him if there's a big rooted problem behind it. Yeah, this could be an easy fix.

Well, it could save you some money. Haley, thank you. Okay, message is in. My husband and I both got night guards for sleeping in because we grind our teeth. Mine's fine. He has destroyed his. $600 that cost and it's gone in two weeks. He's a grinder.

Wow, big grinder. Botox. Yes, Botox and the Botox. In the Massetis or something like that? Phone charges. He'll sit there while it's charging and just leans the phone on the cable and it always starts working because he's bent them to shit and he's always like, oh, these are, these are shit that don't make them very well.

They're also not cheap. Yeah, you need to get in one of those, you can buy those charges. A shelf. It makes a shelf attaches to the charges so you can put it on. top or below. My partner rips through my vape pods. He reckons he doesn't vape. I don't need a vape because I'm not a vapour.

But he just uses mine, never replaces them either. That's right up there with I'm not eating chips, but I'll eat yours. Yeah, yeah. No, I'm not getting chips. I'm on a diet. I'll have just have some of yours. Because then you can say that you didn't order the chips and you don't eat chips, but you've eaten the chips.

I don't count. What do I have like five, six handfuls of yours? By your own. Yeah. Somebody said my partner goes through a bottle of Roland deodor in a week. What? Famously, that's supposed to last for I hate Roland deodorant.

He must be so much. He needs to meet baby powder guy. Yeah, they should have a pasty underarm. They would be a pasty underarm. Like a beautiful glue. Get a spray, grow up. I've been using, I use a gel. So nice, the Mitcham gel.

I might go back to a speed stick for a while. This morning, though, my gel's empty. Couldn't find a spray on or anything. I opened up my mum's bathroom drawer in my bathroom, and she had like an old classic pink mum. I'm wearing mum. Are you wearing a mum? I'm not sweating.

The chocolate biscuit packet I'm married to a female cookie monster She'll get through a pick of biscuits So nobody is What's our Jaden's message dinner I actually enjoy drinking ice cold milk It's delicious There's someone for the hearing

Typical Jaden behaviour My fiancé rips through my patience His name in my phone is literally The Destroyer of Peace What a blessed life you have Amazing, yeah Toilipa I don't know what she's doing In there but I reckon she's going

For a plaque on the wall The local Kindi for toilet roll donations See I think men are the worst of toilet bullet paper. And I'm always like, but you're not even, you're not wiping for every occasion. Yeah, but sometimes it's like wiping vivid, hey. Yeah, I get that. Stop. The sharp stop. The end of a sharp end of a sharp end. I eat some bloody father. My partner's going through track pants. He wears them to work. He's a builder. So every time he gets hot, he'll just cut his track pants into shorts. And then next time it's cold, be like,

another another, no, the pure track pants. I kind of like that. Yeah. I kind of like that. Do we? Where were we when? Wasn't with you, Fletch? Or was it with you born? And there was a guy. And he was so hot. Do we have just like pulled up next to us and cut off his hoodie sleeves and was like, that's better and then carried on? And we were like, yeah, right. That rings a bell.

Weird. Yeah. Weird that didn't cut off the hood. The Z&M Podcast Network. Play Zat M's flesh, one and haley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Ah, do-dududud do-dood-to-do-to-do-to-do-to-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.

Do do do do Do. It's shipwreck week here at Fact of the Day And Fact of the Day is brought to you by St. Piers. Today's Foo-Fushi? Sushi of the day is eight pieces of salmon supreme for $8.40,

which I guess is a fushi because it's a fish sushi. It is a fish sushi. It's a fushi. I reckon that's the quickest time in which he's remembered. Yeah, thank you to St. Piers. He did forget momentarily. Thank you and apologies. I did because I was getting excited about ships

because it's shipwreck week here at fact of the day. And this was, today's fact, is the fact spurred shipwake, shipwreck week, because I went to the Titanic exhibition. And I was surprised at the end it compares all the deaths to other famous shipwrecks and the Titanic isn't even in the top 10.

Oh. Wow. Are we going to learn the others this week? Yep. About 1,500 on the Titanic. Now, the reason it wasn't more is that the Titanic was only at about 62% of maximum total capacity when it sunk.

It's made a voyage expensive. If you wanted the good ones, a lot of people were like, let's just see how it goes first. Wisely so. And so it was only carrying about 2,200 people. It could have been carrying up to 3.5,000 people. But even then, if it had sunk at full capacity, it probably still wouldn't be in the top five

of shipwrecks that resulted in large amounts of death. Oh, okay. I'm going to start with the wartime ones. The Lancasteria. A German bomber sunk the ship while I was evacuating British troops. The death told us somewhere between 3,000 and 5,000. Jesus. Oh, wow.

Churchill suppressed the news at the time. Nauty Churchill. There was the Cape Arcona, which was an RAF aircraft sunk the ship. So that's the Royal Air Force, sunk the ship, which the SS, Germans. had crammed with concentration camp prisons. Whipsy daisy. 5,000 died. And that was killed by their own

just days before the war actually ended, which isn't great. Apparently they didn't know that it was full of concentration camp prisoners. God, I can't wait for the fun ones. Yeah. A British... There's really grim start to this one.

No, there's no, by the way, just on a whole, if you're talking about shipwrecks and death, there's not going to be some fun ones. Is there not some fun ones? A British submarine... Unless submarinesia thing. A British submarine sunk a Japanese hell ship, a shunumar muir,

which is carrying Allied prisoners of war and forced labour is five and a half thousand died. Again, whoopsie daisy. So slaves? Yes. And prisoners, yeah. Oh, you come the fun ones, fleets. Here we go.

A Soviet hospital ship called Armenia was sunk in the Black Sea in 1941 by a German torpedo. Estimate they lost between 5,000 and 7,000. Very few survivors. So sick people and patients. Because it was a hospital one year. Kids were all.

Getting funner. It's not getting better, is it? Nope. Goya in the Baltic Sea in 1945, a German evacuation ship. They were taking Germans out of Soviet Russia because they were like, we're in big trouble. We're going to lose this war. Soviet submarines sunk that one between 6,000 and 7,000 dead.

It's sunk in minutes. That's a few. No one had a chance. Okay. The Wilhelm Gustloff. It was in 1945 in the Baltic Sea. It is considered the deadliest shipwreck in history, a Soviet submarine torpedoed, the German liner.

It was like a German cruise liner that they, When it got to the war, they were like, let's get these refugees out of Soviet Russia. Between 5,000 and 9,000 dead, because a lot of them were undocumented, they were just piling on the boat. They actually have no idea of exactly but very few survivors of that. This is such great water cooler chat today. Do you want to know, the non-war time ones? I sort of feel like I'm tapped out of death tolls.

Okay. Yeah. You will miss out on... Like a pirate? You will miss out on a ship. There's more pirates involved. The coast of Gambia, which was made to have 500 people on it, but it had over 2,000 and a storm capsized it.

Again, like, do you have one where it was transporting like fluffy teddy bears? Yeah, and then they all floated to shore where they were picked up by children who were looking for love. Yes. Okay, here's one. A ship carrying refugees from the Chinese Civil War had a left over World War two Japanese sea mine, and over 3,900 would not like. No, no. No.

I'm not the vibe of what we were like. What a ferry collided with a ship carrying rubber duckies cap size? A ferry collided with an oil tanker and caught fire. No? No. So it's on fire and sinking. Wildly overloaded. The ferry was overloaded.

A lot of passengers weren't ever, you know, counted on or tag on. Maybe tomorrow let's... Do you have a New Zealand shipwreck any New Zealand? We've got a Houston shipwreck. The Endeavour. Okay. Something like that. Not the Endeavour.

What was the one? The Wahaheaheahe. No, that's not. That's not. I'll try to find a fun one about treasure tomorrow. Okay, that'd be great. Yeah, thank you. Pirates shipwrecks.

The ones in fish tanks. Yeah. And then the lid shuts again. What about like the ship from Hux? You know, Peter Pan. Yeah, Peter Pan. Come on. Back to the drawing board.

We'll do that. Well, today's fact of the day is the Titanic isn't even in the top ten for the death tiles for shipwrecks. Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day. Day, day, day. The ZDivortus yesterday. Three different messages yesterday. One from, I'm almost willing to call him official show historian Wilson.

Oh, okay. Wilson always pops up and says something about the show, and I'm just like, I've got no idea what you're talking about. He's like, you said it. And I was like, that doesn't mean anything. Yeah. I said 1,000. Every day has a thousand things.

Messages into FVHZM as well saying, guys, don't forget tomorrow, which is right now today. Yeah. Is Gay Farmers Day? Of course. And Wilson said, happy Gay Farmers Day for tomorrow, don't forget.

And I said, what are you talking about Wilson? Wilson said, it was your idea. It was you guys that did it, Gay Farmer Day. And I said, what? And he sent me a timestamp to our podcast a year ago today, and now we take a trip down memory lane. Oh.

I'm a male farmer hooking up with my boss's supervisor and he's hot. I'm kidding. Gay farmers. I've got some gay farmers. Gay farmers. Oh, yeah. It wouldn't be many of those. My bit is not out and about.

Text it, 969. Are you a gay farmer? Are you a gay farmer? We could do a new segment on the show, gay farmer. Gay farmer. Are you a gay farmer? I don't know what we'd do with the segment, but. Probably once a year we could do that.

It's our yearly Mark it in the calendar On the 29th of September Yep Or the closest weekday we can get Because I am not working weekends We do are you a gay farmer One year from today to celebrate

Yes Yeah See you September 29th Okay great Wow and here we are And here we are September 29th Our first softmoor

Sophomor is that where you That's the first time Follow up Yeah One of those words First gay Welcome 96-96

So 96 Are you a gay farmer? Are you a gay farmer? How are you celebrating? And also, let's mark it now. Join us next year. For Gay Farmer Day. September 29 as we celebrate.

Should I give us to see what day of the week it's going to be next year? Yeah, it'll be Wednesday, won't it? September the 29th. Wednesday, yes, correct. Okay, so it'll be a Wednesday. That's a nice, midweek. How can you tell a farmer out farming is a gay farmer? You know, I'm like, what are the signs?

966. If you are a gay farmer or you work with a gay farmer. Right. Because we just want to celebrate you. I reckon when you're getting the cows in, mostly like, come on, cow girls, cowgirls, and gay farmers are more like, let's go girls. That's the giveaway.

Is that the giveaway? That's what they said. I just had a 315. Gay farmers are literally everywhere. Undercover. 90% of. Oh, no, we don't. Oh, yeah.

Okay. Well, today we celebrate. Well, yeah. I'm coming. Like, yeah, let's go. My neighbour's a gay farmer, says Amory. Somebody said that a rainbow appears on the gay farmer's farm once a week. No, I think straight to have rainbows too.

No, but they're not as gay. Not as gay, right. Not as vivid. Well, if you do, if you do have a double-ended rainbow either. No, sorry, a double rainbow. Double rainbow. If you do have a neighbor, who is it? My neighbor's a gay farmer.

Yeah, you wish him a happy birthday. Not happy gay farmer's day. Yeah, just tip. Tip your hat. Tip your hat to them. And say, enjoy your day. If you're bobbing into PGG rights in today or farm sauce or farmlands and, you know, just give an open-mouth kiss. Someone said I'd put my money on the fat that most female farmers are gay.

Oh, the daughters of farmers. I don't know about that. I'm not mad at her. Gay female farmers. Strong hands. Yeah, rough. Working hands. I'd love to fix you up a sandwich.

A long day. Get it done. Well, happy gay farmers day to all this. All those that celebrate. The ZDM Podcast Network. Quick catch up. I'm converting my garage into a little studio flat for my mum and dad. And I'll tell you what, who caught my Roth yesterday?

Auckland Council. Yeah, man. Day 20 of 20. Where is it? You've got till today. You're becoming such a carer and it's so funny. Well, because during the last renovation I was like good cop and I was like, good cop. The cops are gone.

Good cop's dead. Good cop and bad cop. You're dealing with ice. You're the ice now. Yeah. No good cops. So I said, I caught up and I was like, so it's day 20 of 20. Legally, you know, you have to have issued it or sent me some requests in that time.

Yeah, where is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no, you will get there? So it's 3.30, so it'll be done in an hour and a half, will it? They'll just ask a question and the clock will reset. Yeah, I know. Oh, I can see the game coming. The council are great. They'll feel my wrath.

Yep. They shall feel it. Anyway, so I'm in the garage yesterday. Interesting, you say Roth. I would say wrath. I say wrath. Shakespeare, it's Roth. Shakespeare say Roth

Yeah But it's wrath I would say wrath I think we've 96-96 Roth or wrath Put an O in Roth O or A

Yeah Do you want of Shakespeare or Wrath is a noun That means extreme anger Or vengeance Okay Well Roth is an archaic adjective

Which means anger or furious No So he did receive my No he received my Roth It's archaic And oh we don't say it We say wrath Okay

Well he actually got Rothed and raft He got rath, broth, Wrift. Right, right and centre. Anyway, I was having a good day yesterday because I was back in my demo and tackling the big bit

that I had to do, the real big tear-down moment. But before that, obviously, I had to remove three sets of fluoro tube lights. Oh, yeah. And not just the bulbs. I had to take down the whole thing. Now I'm going to put this up on my socials later today because it was a bit rogue

the way I went about it. I mean, you're dealing with electricity. I do dumb stuff. Granted. Granted. Your Honour, I do dumb stuff. I wouldn't have done this. No.

So what I did was, I did turn off the power at the switchboard. Congrats. Okay, great. Everything. No, no, no. The main power to the garage. Yeah. Yeah.

But everything in the garage. Powerpoints. Just the main one on the left. That doesn't mean anything to me. Here we go. It's surprising you're even alive in here today. Right? there's three. I go on the first one. I've had a quick

little Google and it was like bamboozled me. So it got in there and I was like, right. Under the tubes. Yep. They got to smash. Duff on. Into the skit. Straight to the skip. Like you're in Star Wars. Yeah. Yep. Like this. Took those out.

Easy peasy. Then pop the cap of the actual unit, easy. And I'm thinking, Sparkies. Sit down home. By the way, remember I'm doing all of this because I'm saving money. I do have a sparky friend who I will say later in the day it was consulted but sent him a text being like, I won't die and he was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

So pop this and then there's all the wires, quite a long system for these long tube lights, all the wires like this. And what I did was I unscrewed the whole system from the roof and then it was dangling like this. Oh my God. Still connected to the wire. Fantastic.

And I went back on AI and it was like, no, no, no, you needed to have detached it first. and then it would have just slid off like that. And I was like, oh my God. So this thing is like swinging and rotating. And then where all the... And maybe coursing with 240 volts. Yeah.

And then where... No, I did this switch. And then where all the wires go in, you know, it connects into a little white thing and then there's other ones where there's electricity's happening. Are little screws. And then it was like,

you've got to unscrew those. And man, I had to like work myself up to it. I was like... I was got to get a scooter. I was going to just screwdriver are in there. So I go and get the right-size screwdriver out of the shed. And then I'm there. And I was like, I've just got to do this.

And then checking with AI and then my sparky friend, then I was like, I'm not going to die. He was like, get a tester. You can get testers, right? They'd touch it. And if it buzzes, it's got current. Do not proceed. Yeah.

It has a rubber handle. Yep. And I was like, man, I've already been to the tool shop once today. I'm running out of time. Time's short. Hailey! So the way that I test it, well, I was like, if I just, with my screwdriver, touch it quickly,

if it zacked me, it would be shorter than if I was just inserting the home. No, that's not how it works, Haley. Are you listening to this madness? I had to really talk my self. Blowing back off a ladder from the hour and high. No, no, no, I'm not on a ladder. I'm on the ground. The floor's low.

So I was all right. And I just had this huge, like, gussy up moment. And I was like, I'm going to do it. I'm going to do anything. I'm going to do it. And if it shocks me, I welcome the challenge. And it's, bit dead. It was fine.

That's the dumbest. I'm a Sparky and this is how people die. Yeah, exactly. See, we're getting messages in. And yet, who's speaking? Haley Sproul. This is bad because it's giving you a false confidence now. Well, I'm a little bit scared now because I got them all off, right?

It was all definitely off. And then my Sparky, who's around the corner, was like, come over and I was like, that's not a catch-up, mate. That's you're going to charge me. Staying over at your side of town. Don't even pull in my driveway, Scott. He's like, make sure the green, the red and the black are not touching each other. So I separate all those.

You've got to tape or you put that thing on them. Yeah, I said, can I just tape them all up? And he said, don't do that. Go get some proper connectors. And I was like, well, I don't have them now. So that's a tomorrow job. But I had to go into the main house and switch the power back on because the garage doors were up. Oh, yeah.

And I needed the power on to get them down. No, you do that disengaged cord. and you pull them down and then you re-engage it and locks it down there. Well, I'm going to learn a new school. I've already taught myself how to turn off light bulbs. We're now going to work out how to manually put down my garage door. So I was at the switchboard just being like,

we're just sick. Just see if anything just goes crazy. You flug at the whole neighbourhood just goes, boom. Nah, switched it, garage doors down, out the side door. Look at me. I'm alive. The lights are down.

They're still just hanging bald wires today. So today I'll go and I'll get the little white things to box them off and then who needs a man? Any other texts from electricians listening? Well my neighbour who listens, another neighbour up the street, I messaged

him being like, do you have one of those connected tests? And he just messaged back saying, what the ever you doing? Why? Why? Why? And I was like, oh no, no, no, I'm actually good, I've figured it out. And he said, how? And I said, I put my screwdriver in it to see if it was alive. And he was like, I'm home at seven. Like, stop, stop, stop. Someone said, do you want to change your heart rhythm, Haley?

A little bit. Maybe a little bit. Could be. Yeah. Could be good. Anyway, the lights are down, aren't they? Christ, you're a worry. I just want to say there's a rainbow outside of the studio, celebrating gay farmers.

Happy Gay Farmers Day. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh, Forne and Hayley. I want to ask right now, when did pets cause, or make a separation worse, or cause drama in the separation? Now this is a wild story. There was a couple. They adopted a golden retriever together.

Love a golden retriever. Best dogs. Best dogs. Best dogs won't hear anything else. They moved into a cottage together, adopted a, it was a shelter puppy as well. Oh, gorgeous. Lily was its name. They had three good years with Lily, went everywhere with them, you know, dog-friendly pumps, just living the life.

Now, their owners split up. Uh-oh. Who's getting Lily? the boyfriend gets Lily because he's got more space you know blah blah blah blah blah now they're on kind of good terms to start and he offers you know you can come and visit

Lily you know you could still be involved in Lily's life like you are like it's a human and after trying that a couple of times she realizes it actually just heartbreaking for her and the dog gets confused so she's like I'm just going to remove myself from this after a little bit of healing she pops to a shelter because she's like I need a dog to replace this dog size hole

in my heart gets to the shelter And who does she say? It's her dog. He gave the dog up to the shelter. Gave it back to the shelter. Have it back to the shelter. Rather than giving it to her. He didn't even offer her. It is. But she said she didn't want it.

She said she couldn't have it, right? It was a friend who had spotted Lily at the local shelter. Sorry, not she turned up. A friend spotted when they were looking for the dog for her and was like, what the hell? And it had been surrendered a few days earlier. So then she goes to the shelter and was like, yep, that's Lily. Like, that's my dog. Whining, just like upset.

And then the staff said that the boyfriend was just like, turned up and was like, I can't look after this dog and gave it back with no more explanation than that. Did he just take the dog to be like facetious? facetious and yeah. Yeah, yeah, for sure. To have one over her?

Yeah, yeah, for sure. She said she just paid the fees and took the dog home. And now it's her dog. Yeah, yeah. She tried messaging the boyfriend, by the way, and he'd blocked her. Like, it was just, drop, mate, the separation. Big old adventure, hasn't it?

Hasn't it? Yeah. Who loves me? What happened before it ended up in the shelter? it's in the shelter, it goes to this home, they break up, it's just for him, and then it goes for another trip to the shelter and then home with her. But like, this is why I want to know, like,

when did pets cause drama in the separation? Because years ago I had a friend, and they did like 50-50 parenting. I was going to say people do this. And they had no kids. It's normally the dogs, it wouldn't be, it would be hard to 50-50 a cat, like have weekends or months.

It would be the sort of thing that a crazy cat people would do would be like, well, the cat stays in the house and it's just us who changes. Yeah, yeah, we'll get a rental. Yeah, yeah. And we switch it to week. And we're moving together. Well, yeah.

Okay, well, this is what we want to know. 0800 dials at em. You can text as well. 9-696. Did a pet cause more drama in this separation? That's what we want to know this morning. What was the drama? We got some messages in.

We're my old boss separated from his wife. Their son, they did their son, cuss that he week on, week off, and he just put the cat in the carrier with him and took him between the two houses. Do it? I can't imagine my cat liking that. No, my cat is so territorial.

I guess they'd get used to it. Maybe. My partner and I solved this problem because when we got a cat, we got a cat each. I got a silver sp- Oh, you're separating them. You're their friends. Okay, what if? I can't.

One of the cat dies, and it's the death of the cat that, you know, blows the relationship apart. And then you're going to be like, you don't get the only cat surviving. They're like, it's my cat. Yeah. Like how it is. Like how it is. I got a silver spotted bengal, and my partner got a blue Burmese. Problem solved with the shit.

hits the fan, we've got a cat each. Okay. That's what you think for now. But that's the thing, what if the cat likes the other person more? Yeah, my cat likes any man but me. You know what I mean? Like, he loves anyone who comes over.

It's probably because you're walking around the house yelling at dogs over the fence. Screaming at dogs. Sticking screwdrivers and PowerPoints. Yeah, yeah, generally having a meltdown. You filled the house with a whole lot of dead animals. Yeah, this is true. He pretty thinks he's next.

Probably not the most fun to be with. Some messages because we asked this on Instagram too. Previous Flatman and the X their dog week on, week off. It's been eight years. No, because then you're tethered to this person. I know, that's the thing they're always in your life. Just let them have the cat.

Yeah, get a new cat. Or you get the cat, whatever. I work in family law and recall a case that went to the high court over two dogs. That would have been like designer dogs. 100%. That would yuck bejeon freeze or something. No, you're not going to high court for a bejeon. How much money you're spending tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars?

High court, yeah, that's not. That's not cheap. For a dog. My ex tried to take my dog off me after we broke up. He threatened to take me to court over him through his lawyers, even though I'd had my dog for five years before we were even together. That ain't your dog. That's not your dog.

Yeah. He wasn't even allowed around some of his family because they had cats. I think they're talking about the dog. Yeah, right. So it's pretty obviously. He was just trying to use her to get to me after we broke up. Anyway, he lost. My dog and I still very happy.

Oh, that's nice. Good, good. when we separated, we've got a dog each. My dog is 13 and mostly blind So not practical to share care Wait, sorry Does he have a stick? You're, but you like, okay, we've got two dogs

Let's separate one each He's like, yeah, one each, you get that one It's blind and 13 years old But it says my three hours The other house is coming to stay But it's lonely at the other dog may have passed Yeah, maybe, yeah The other dog may have passed around

That dog's 13 and you got them at the same time 13, big dog, that's a good innings It is, yeah The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley This guy's going to be very confused. I'm currently in a simulation while I'm on

here. So if you've ever been to Berlin, it is known for its like techno nightclubs. Oons! I've never been to Berlin. I has also never been to Berlin. I've been three times really. Is there a particular reason you

keep going back? Are there any clubs in Berlin? I actually haven't. I wanted to go this year to go to the Kit Kat club. Yeah. But no, the Oh, okay, I've been to that one. And we agreed, we wouldn't look each other in the eye. This club that you're going to talk about.

Tell us a story about the club. Is incredibly famous. So Birkheim is one of the notoriously... Never heard of it, no interest in going. Thank you. Everyone's so shocked, Vaughan, that you haven't heard of this German nightclub. Even if you're not into nightclubs,

I feel like this would be incredible place to stick to go-to. How much of Red Bull Vodkas? A thousand euros. Come on, Grandpa. porridge. I'm eating my porridge right now. Eat your porridge and sip your little tea. I've overspice it with cinnamon though. I love so. Oh, too hot.

Look cute in your Pokemon T-shirt. So Birkine is open in Berlin 2004. The most famous nightclub in the world is its title. And the thing is it's very hard to get into because there's no rhyme or reason. So there's a guy. He's the head bouncer. His name is Sven Makard.

He is also photography. He's worked on the door since day one. And before that has been known in the nightclubs. scene of Berlin. So he's the one you have to impress to get in. And getting in his heart, you line up for hours and hours and hours, and you get to the front. And if he doesn't think that your vibe is elite,

gone. So this guy's Watson, Peter, at the Pula Gates. Basically. Basically. And it's not like there's a dress code. It could be, literally, you could be wearing anything. He says it's subjective. Is it a vibe check? It's a full vibe check. So, for years it's been a secret.

What does he look for? And he did an article, he didn't interview not too long ago. It was last year and he said it's subjective. Only a handful of his team, if he's not available, are allowed to pick. And he basically reads the night and he's like, who are the DJs?

What's the energy? And is this person, but he lets some tricks to get in. Arrive early, come in a small group, don't be too drunk. Fit in, but stand out. It's not about fashion. It's about like style, vibe, energy. Are you chatty in the line or are you a menace? You know, you bit stumbly.

Vibe check. So, Hello, Sven. I am currently on bergentrainer.com. Bergheiner. Because that's the name of the club Berghein. Yeah. So someone's made a virtual simulation. Shish.

Okay. Have you plugged it in? Yeah. Oh, do you want me to plug it into that? You can plug it into the line. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I was cranking my own German on Stornstein. Over here.

Yeah. Well, I put this on. This is on Berghein trainer.com. Sven's looking at me. Sorry not today. I got turned around because I was talking. Oh, Sven, Sven, let me in.

Let me start again. No, you're going to get back in line. Your simulator is now going to be three hours. Welcome to Burkheim trainer. The trainer needs access to your camera and microphone. I would have given you all of this. For analyzing your body language. Anyway, so you go on and you do this,

and it simulates walking up to the club. You meet Sven. Yeah. And he asks you three questions. Okay. Okay. Is it a German? Is it German?

Yeah, no, you say, okay, and now it's letting me in. So I'm walking up to the first. front door and basically you like act this out if you were going to Berlin and he asks you three questions you answer them and it decides whether or not you can get it. Look I'm putting down my beer on the street like this. It's so good and he asks you like are you drunk are you with a big group? Shannon did it earlier. Didn't get in. Oh, Horn didn't get in. Well I did it just now didn't get in. I am wearing sort of like a pink t-shirt. It's not really the Berlin. Yeah no. Berlin's black on black on black. It's black. A lot of black. Yeah. Here he is. Here he is.

Hang on. How old are you? How old are you? Hey, I'm like 37. Pretty young. Why should I let you in? Why should I let you in? Because I've come all this way.

I've come from New Zealand. And man, I'm here to bring the vibes. She's out. No, no. He's a loser. Desperate a loser. Where comes you're coming from? Where are you coming from?

All the way from Altero, New Zealand. Bottom of the world, baby. Heard a lot of the rings? That's us. I wouldn't let you. Hang on, he's turning away. He's looking at me. Oh, here's his decision.

Passoid knee. Not today. Screw you, Sven. I'll be back. Not happening. You should play along. Bergheimtrainor.com. Play Z-M's Fleshhorn and Haley.

There is a sandwich competition going on at the moment, and I'm personally attacked, but I haven't been invited to be involved. As a man who loves a sandwich. We made amazing sandwiches the other day, like all deli meats and double cheese. and avocados and pestoes and real Italian style. So it's been run by Freya's, the bread company,

because of course that's a crucial part of a sandwich, isn't it? As a Plalman's ambassador, to sit out. Were you going to sit this one out? Yeah, yeah, no, that was years ago. So the winner gets five grand, a year supply of bread, and the sandwich will be recreated and sold at Al Brown's Fed Deli. Oh, we love Al Brown's chicken salad sandwich toasted with cheese. Yeah.

So you can go and experience it. One of the front runners at the moment is a Kiwi onion dip and ready salted chip sandwich. Oh no. Actually, no, I can buy. I love chips in a sandwich. It's got other stuff in it. Marmite and chips in a sandwich. But those are like the crucial ingredients. What else is in this sandwich?

Salad. Some lettuce in there. Al Brown's in a recreation and he's put rocket in it, like that mescalum lettuce. No. Well, it makes it a bit nutty, doesn't it? It makes it like peppery nuts. No, you want the crunch of an iceberg. No, that's just watery.

Or a fancy. I won't be participating in the sandwich. You won't be participating in the sandwich. putting in the sandwich. There looks to be some sort of... You don't eat the crunch of iceberg. You've got crunch of chips. That's a very good call. Rockets got flavour.

Iceberg to say something. Is there gravy in there? No, there's no gravy. I want some chicken and gravy. It looks like there's some mayonnaise been thrown around. Oh, yep. You can't have chicken and gravy. That's his chicken and gravy sandwich.

I know, I love that sandwich. That already exists. Yeah. If you don't live in Auckland, if you ever come up, the fed deli, the chicken salad sandwich, get it toasted with cheese, and it dips in gravy. You wouldn't know this because you don't reply to your Instagram DMs and Fletch.

You're somewhat of a social media ghost that pops up every now and then if you're travelling or if your cat's doing something, coo-y. Yes, yeah, that's true. But the amount of messages I get from people being like, now I know you guys work in Central Auckland, I'm coming up to Auckland for a concert and we want to eat. Give me your top ten restaurants.

Fed. I'm like, who am I? Jesse effing mulligan? Yeah, yeah. Flick them on. You also, like, Haley and I would be the ones to ask. You famously don't. You don't go out. I've got some places I like to eat, but I always put fed on the list.

Yeah. As a breakfast option or a lunch option. over breakfast it's great because then you can do the pancakes. We haven't had lacquies team we haven't fed in a while. We need to we haven't fed it is yeah well we fitted semi recently after after the all the bungee drops

for the daffat all day. That's right. Why was it there? We had a boy of breakfast. You had a boy date yeah boy date we had a boy date yeah so what I guess sandwich competition on? See I reckon this I've never tried it with a traditional kiwi onion dip but I was a big veggie mite and chip sandwich growing up

Yeah sometimes if you find like half a bag of chips left from like a night or something, you're like, I'm have a chippy sandwich. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Butter, heaps of butter. Heaps of butter. Vegetimite. Butter on both slices so that the chips don't escape.

Marmite on both slices. Maybe a little Tom sauce. No, you've lost me. What kind of chip would you have? Salt and Vin. Salt and Vin or just plain. Yeah. Chicken?

Question mark? Soutre cream and chives, actually. So any chip. Well, salt cream and chives means you don't need the kiwi onion dip because it's kind of adding a bit of that with the extra. No, you can double. You can double. You can double up on the dirt.

It's like when people make cheese rolls in the South Island and they use Kiwi Onion dip in it as well. Yeah. If the chair... Yeah, yeah, that's right. Adds to it. Adds to it. Oh, another one in the bag.

It's a Versace bag as well. If you enjoyed that, give us a rating and review and be sure to tell your mates. You don't sound sincere there, boy. I'm just reading what's written here. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.