ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 30th July 2026

Episode Date: July 29, 2026

00.00: Intro 01.45: The fountain bill 07.00: Top 6 - Other ways the eftpos card knows you 13.30: E- Bike handles are GROSSSS 20.20: SLP - Do you wash your pans hwne they're hot or cold? 25.25: Hayley's hedge update 31.55: Unpredictable History 41.40: Why did you drop a name? 50.20: TikTok slang you need to know 55.20: Tell us a joke about yourself 1.07.20: Fact of the day 1.11.45: Vaughan's cast iron update 1.18.15: The girlies are doing sports trips 1.21.15: Whats in your hosue that never gets used 1.30.55: The death off the house guest See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

from the ZM Podcast Network. This is... Fleshwin and Haley's Big Pod. Thanks to animates, making happy happen for pets. Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. Great day to be alive. We'll give you the chance to win tickets

to post Malone this morning, around 720. Double pass, first call of three when you hear the activated, seem live in October. The top six coming up, Vaughn. Yeah, this was cool. Yeah, there's gonna be new ways,

bio... How did they put it? Bio... scan sorts of ways that the F-Boss terminal will know it's you. Well, you use your face or a... Or a thumbprint. There was a thumbprint, a face scan. A face scan.

A face scan. And it's like, yeah, that's them. But Jesus. Yeah, like, quite after my iPad, the angle it's at. Yeah. On its little stand, it's like, don't recognize your face. You have to be like, who's this fatty fortune?

Yeah, yeah, hi, Fletch. You've had a blow out again. Nothing was when you wake up and try and unlock your phone and your phone doesn't know it's you. Yeah. It's not a great start to the day, is it? Sorry, where's my beautiful owner? My beautiful young owner who set this two years ago.

It's this puffy-eyed mess. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why are you crying? Well, I've got the top six. Otherwise, the EFOS terminal all know it's you. Okay. Next on the show, though, there's a little problem. Yes, there is.

Invercago City Council. I love them Cargall. They've been dealing with the poohs in the pool. Oh, a long time ago. The Coed Browns. That was it last summer? Didn't they have a few more repeat visitors of the Code Browner? I didn't keep my finger on that one.

over the summer, I just, I unplugged. Well, this is another water-based situation. Oh, no. For the council to deal with, but at the other end of the, the icky spectrum. Almost too clean. Correct, Amanda. The ZDM Podcast Network.

What's going on? ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. In Hamilton, we had a famous fountain outside the now shut down. They shut down one of the theaters there because it was an earthquake risk. Oh, yeah? I don't know. I haven't been around that area lately to see.

Over the road from Sedan Park, the famous Fletch, you know to the cricket ground? Yes, I know that. We had a theatre there. And outside, there was a fountain that represented a dandelion. You're familiar with the dandelion, you pick it, you blow it. Make a wish. It looked like that. Now, when you put dishwash powder in that thing, or a dishwashing liquid,

but five-liter sunlight, that thing went off. Yeah. Because it sprayed the water out to make it look like dame. Sandy lions. Yeah. So it would just foam. And the Hamilton City Council was like, stop it. We had the same...

Every time it happened. On Dixon Street. Yep. Just the end of Courtney Place, the ponds there. The bucket fountain. Yeah, bucket fountain used to do all the time. The bucket fountain wouldn't foam very well, though. No, no, you need a movement.

Yeah, the bucket fountain would be a... No, I'm not going to say it. Don't. That thing's been vandalised more times than it hasn't. And producer Shannon said that their thing... of choice to put in what it was custard powder. Custad powder. What an...

That's a bore like to get out, Shandall. Where was this, Shannon? So this was in East Auckland, but everyone would travel to Mission Bay, the Mission Bay Fountain. Yeah. And put custard powder. Proud to say, never did it,

but I did find it funny. It would take a lot of custard powder, but also that's... I feel like dishwashing liquid would clean the fountain and eventually die down, but custard powder's forever. Well, the reason we discuss this

is because in Vicargle City Council. I'm getting there. I'm crafting a story. I'm going to a regional context. It's a long journey. To this happening. Yeah. It's a long journey.

What's your fountain? Yeah, actually that was where I was getting to. 966, what was the water feature in your town? They've got a red hot. Sometimes more needs to go back to broadcasting school. I'll say it. Take the time craft a story. So it's Invercargill that have released an actual cost per time.

We got there. We're there. A cost per time of Invercargall's Gala Street fountain. Where's that? I love him the Cargill. It's on Garner Street, is it? And it's in Invacargo. Actually, if me, I deserve that.

You do deserve that. I deserve that. No, that's fair. So they're saying it's approximately $100 each time to sort it out. And over the course of the year, they had to do it at 50. I thought it would be more. It's just like time alone. They're paying a contractor maybe or they have to pay for water.

They neutralise the fountain involving gallons of vinegar and staff time. Vinegar. Oh. Would negate it, I guess. Vinegar's cheap. If you're just getting your white cleaning vinegar, you go home brand. Yeah, five litres. That's a cheap way.

And that's the same white vinegar that you're going to be slopping in a sort of a dressing or anything as well, too. So, that's not go fancy. Vinegar is vinegar. Vinegar is vinegar. So staff time and a few gallons of vinegar to get it done 100 bucks a time. That's cheap. What's the fountain called in the carcule? I've forgotten the name of the street.

G-A-L-A. G-L-A. G-L-A-S-A. So they reckon what five thousand a year they're spending. Five thousand a year because it's doing, people are doing it once. a week. Yeah, that's a nice, big gushy fountain. Yeah. People did this a lot of Nelson, Nelson as well.

Yeah, Nelson's got a good fountain. Anywhere where there's fountains. NAPE's got a good fountain. Where's fountain? They're in the middle of the road over from the basketball, the Trafalgar Center. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think there's a couple from memory, and they always got foamed.

They got a big foamed. Oh, literally there is a photo of the Invercargo fountain foamed. Oh, that's a good fountain. It's a bloody good fountain. I don't know. I don't work in fountains. I'm embarrassed to say my fountain knowledge is somewhat lacking. But could you just leave it? Until it out.

Because you know when you're doing the dishes and you don't pull the plug out because you're like, I might need to do some more dishes and you go back hours later and all the bubbles are gone. Maybe not. Because it's still in the water, isn't it? Yeah, the water is screwed. It just circulates, isn't it? But it's not draining. It's going to get to a point where it doesn't bubble forever.

Yeah, I don't know. But it will dilute into the water and the water's all yuck. Memorial Park Fountain and Ta-Rong is getting a... I know that one, that would double well actually. Yeah, okay. Again, we're not encouraging it. No. We're not encouraging it.

But they do love seeing it. Sorry. There's one house near mine, like we want to go for a little neighborhood walkies. And it's a very like understated home, just a normal humble Kiwi home, but they have a massive fountain on the front lawn like it's a mansion. Oh, okay. Which it suds it. Whereabouts is this?

down past the school. No, no, no, I was just wondering, it's in your neighbourhood. Yeah, literally just around the corner. But it's on their private properties. You're not going on. Oh, okay, Dad. Of course we're not. Of course we're not, Dad.

Somebody said, I knew a guy that worked in parks, and he said the issues of people dropped the box or the bottle into it, and that can get stuck in the pump. Oh, that's true. Take your plastics. Take your plastic with you and pop that in the council-pride recycling. Oh, when you were vandalizing. Please recycle.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's FlashWorn and Haley. From the unmoderated comment section, this is the top six. Ooh. I just learn what Palm Vane technology is. And it is one of the new ways F-BOS terminals and your F-Boss card will chit-chat to each other and know that it's definitely you. And not someone that's stolen your...

This is the future of us paying. Palm vein technology is an advanced biometric authentication system that identifies individuals using the unique vascular patterns beneath their skin. So it's not taking your fingerprints, it's scanning your veins. Oh, so our veins are like a fingerprint. Yeah, we all have a unique. And they're all unique. But how unlike a fingerprint, which is easily documented,

how do people know my vein structure? No one's had a lot. I guess when the BNZ sends you a new card, You do face-o-down your phone and then vein structure. V-instruction. You've got to go set it up. Another ones are facial recognition and stuff. F-Boss, New Zealand is launching you

biometric capable payment terminals developed by a manufacturer called V-a-phone. So will this mean you don't need your F-POS card anymore? No, you'll still need your F-Boss. Or even your phone, because I'm loving now when I go out. I hardly take my wallet. Because it's all on my phone. But you know, the piss is still being taken on pay-wave fees. Yeah, it is.

Right there, actually, more. Pay-wave. Pay away two and a half percent. Yeah. And you're like, I'd pick you, pardon? Australia just passed some laws. We didn't have it during COVID and no banks went under. No.

I don't know why. They're doing fine. Are the banks still doing okay? I mean, they're struggling like the rest of us. Struggling like the supermarket. Still making billions of dollars. Yeah. Not as many billions, babe.

So, you know, tease of days. I got into a real spiral there the night I woke up at 2 a.m. And I was just like, but we can't be without a bank. That's not fair. Yeah. Couldn't turn that off. for an hour or so. Go back to sleep. No, I can't. God, we're turning into boomers, eh, all of us? Oh, I love it. I am loving it. I found myself

out loud saying she's not wearing enough for how cold it is the other day. About a teen and a skirt or something. God, she must be cold. She's not wearing enough. She's forgotten half of her bloody outfit. Yeah, does she not know it's three degrees overnight tonight? Because that's another thing about becoming a boomer. You know what temperature is going to be overnight. Yeah, you do. Anyway, I've got the top six ways your E-POS card and the terminal will know it's you through biometric scanning. Number six on the list, your sweet, salty tears at the supermarket

as you realize you're paying $30 a KG for mints. It'll be like, B, recognize tear. That's their tear channel. It always goes down the side and then goes under his nose. Your mince tear. And then it'll go,

and the tear will go up his nose. Number five on the list of the top six, otherwise the F-Boss card and terminal, no, it's you. Your stupid grin when you're buying more clothes that you'll never wear. Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Makes you on a ban. Are you on a ban? Self-imposed yourself. Yeah. Self-imposed clothing ban. How's that going? Got to put a new blazer on Monday. Hey, no one says that.

It's not so it's timeless. It's going to be perfect. Yeah, it's timeless. And that's blazer number. Twini. Gotcha. All timeless, though. Is it for your comedy show?

Sure. Sure. For tax purposes, sure. Sure. In fact, for tax purposes, it can't be worn anywhere else. No, no, no, no. It's a costume. It's strictly a bizarre costume.

the ways your F-Bos card and terminal knows it's you. Your face look of utter disbelief as your tiny car now costs $100 to fill up with 91. Yeah. Yeah. Though the other day I filled up mine and I was like, okay, it didn't feel as bad.

It dipped for a bit, but apparently we're going back. Yeah. We're going back above $3 a lady. Yay. Iran's still happening, it turns out. Is it? Yeah. We need to find some peace there.

It'd be good to find some peace. Peace in the Middle East. I think we'll be looking for some peace in the Middle East for some time now. Right. Number three on the list of the two. Top six are other ways you have the F-Bos card in Terminal notes. How sweaty your palms are is you buy vegetables that you realize will probably just end up rotting in the bottom of your fridge?

Yeah. Just that a little bit of veggie guilt. A little bit like, yep, scanned. Yeah. That's his sweaty palms. Payment accepted. Payment accepted. Good luck using a whole head of salary.

I just wanted a couple of nibs, but I'm not paying for the prepaid cut stuff. I'm not playing for the pre-paid cut stuff and I don't need another plastic bag. No. There was the boom of tone. Sorry. Do you guys want to go thirds on a set? head of celery. No, that's what I'm talking about.

You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm making? By the way, I'm growing some celery in the garden. Far more than I will ever use in an entire millennia. So please, if you guys use that, and I like it in my juice. Bingo. Okay.

Teamwork. Communism? I think that's what you just said is communism. Yeah. Communism? You've been communists? Number two on the list of the top six. Otherwise, the Airbus card in Terminal, no, it's you.

The dilation of your pupils is you panic to wait to see if there's enough money in your account. Oh, yeah. That thing where, you know, sometimes you're like, pay, why, and you leave being like, there's money. I've got this. And sometimes you're like, you just do that linger where you're like, I always linger. Even when I know there's money on my card, I'm always still lingering.

I'm like, oh, oh, oh. Because every now and then you get one of them network faults. Yes, yes, yes, yes. And you don't want them chasing you down the street. No, that's embarrassing. I had a thought it's gone. I thought it was quite fun to share. You had a thought and it's gone because you've got an open vivid

in your hand that you keep sniffing. I just thought Fletch might want to... You've got a whiteboard marquee or snuffing. Rab a nozzle around this. Hang on, no, hang on. What are we just talking about? It's gone. What I hate that.

Walking away, lingering by an F-POS machine. Oh, I saw a great, funny meme. Didn't I send it to you guys? It was like, that's crazy that car decline. There's like $10 million in that account. You know, when you're like, no, there's definitely money in there. There's got to be money.

No, no, no, try again. I think there's literally $10 million in there. And number one in the top six, other ways, the F-Boss card in Terminal, know it's you. the tone on your voice is he said, Gidey, mate, to the guy at the booze shop for the third time this week.

Oh, goody, mate. Oh, good a mate. Yeah. Just the usual he said to me the other day, I was like, Christ, this is a problem now. Yeah, I'll recognise it's a problem. You don't want, you want just the usual ad a kebab store is fine or a bakery,

but not a boo store. My local liquor store, how was France, how was this? Yeah, yeah, got a top-up of the 1800 coconut tequila. I love it. Anything else? Your favourite Prosecco's in the fridge. Oh, yeah. What a special.

on it. Well, that's today's top six. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh, Forne and Haley. Well, shocking news. This is terrible. This is one of the freshest studies I've come across. It's literally got completed last week in London Town. Where some people from the initial washroom hygiene company swabbed 50 e-bikes, like lime bikes and lime scooters. Yep. On the handlebars.

Oh, Haley, no. I don't know. Over the course of just two weeks. No. Wrapping up last week. Oh, I love a swab. We love a swab. I feel like...

How many billions? How many billions of pathogens? We've got some pathogens. We're talking to units. Oh, okay. Lovely. We're talking to units. Okay.

Now, Fletch, the reason this is aimed at you is because you take the most amount of lime scooters I've ever known. You scoot to work. You scoop sometimes from work. You're most of the more walk. Yeah, but you know, if I've got something on scooter. Before, because, you know, used to be a beam guy

before they got rid of the beams. Why they get rid of beams again? Were they naughty? They're lying about how many they had. Yeah, they were lying to the council. That's right. They were naughty. But so since I've been taking limes,

I don't even, oh, sorry, yeah, limes. I don't know when that started. I've done 1,188 kilometers. Shit a brick. 1,300 rides. Sorry, how far? 1188. 1,18.5Ks.

How far away is that? And 1,315 rides. Okay. That's insane. That's a lot. It's a lot, eh? I mean, it's a great way to get around. I think they're really fun.

I just do it because it's quick to get to work. I'll get to work in five minutes as opposed to 15 minutes walk. Yeah, and at 4 o'clock in the morning, anything to shorten that time. Exactly. Now, how far away is that? Give us a contact feel. At a straight line. Yeah.

In Vicargal is 1,187 kilometers away from Auckland as the crow flies. Straight line. That's insane. top to bot. If you were driving by distance, you would be 1188. You would be in just north of Tamaru. Oh, it's nice. Isn't that crazy?

I've done the whole length of the country on a scooter. So, well. And how long? And how many rides over how many years? Like it may be a few years. That's cool that there's those stats. Yeah, I love it. Well, you know, you get to work then and it's breaky time and it's fruit.

which we eat with our hands and you mate your oats and stuff. And if you're not going to the toilet, I mean, I don't go anywhere and wash my hands before I eat. Unless I can get to work and go to the toilet, I don't wash my hands. When did we lose that? Because it was always my mum, right? Wash your hands before dinner. Hands before dinner. If you washed your hands before dinner, if you washed your hands before dinner.

And we washed your hands as dinner. That's what I say as a parent. Go wash your hands as dinner? Yeah, all the time. Do you? I don't. I don't. I'll line to a restaurant.

I'll play that. I'll find if I'm in the kitchen, I'll end up. washing my hands anyway. No, you're totally, but when you're out and about... About a thousand times every time you touch something else, ugh, little off.

You don't wash your hands after you get off a lime scooter. No. This I know. So, bad news. So on there, obviously, they found biological residue, skin cells, sweat, saliva, food residue, and

welcome to the story, fecal matter. Now, we're keeping the show poo light, but we get off of the science purposes we've got fecal matter. Wow. This is the same as, like, if posse machines, ATMs, trolleys at the supermarket.

You don't wipe those down, do you? So the average, yeah, totally. This would be the same. It would be the exact same. Bus handles, you know, we have public transport all over Europe and stuff. I was holding on to things you allow. I'm about to eat a croissant with my fingers.

It's cold flu seasons when I become a little bit more aware of it. And there still are weird, like you stop looking for them, but they're still our hand sanitizer. No, I don't hand sanitizer. So the average contamination reading was one, was 1,500, 1,563 ATP units. So I don't know, it's like, it's medical. It's science, right?

It's a lot. But to put that in context, 1,563 is almost four times the level that's considered high. Oh, wow. That's the average. The higher was 7,000 on one particular one particular. Oh, my God. You're riddled with fecal matter on your hands. It's so bad.

And, you know, one of the reasons that they said that this is so bad on these. This is in London, but this will probably be around, is that the number of public toilets available have dropped by 40%. So people aren't washing their hands or anything like that. Right. Why have the number of public toilets dropped by 40%? I don't know when you go overseas. Like even Auckland, I feel it's bad.

for finding a place if you need to. Too as good is rural. Like if you're driving in New Zealand, every town you're like, I need to pee, it's always a toilet. Pull over on the side of the road and take a purse behind a toy toy bush or something. A little harder for me. Right.

And you wouldn't be careful behind a toy toy toy because that grass, that's cutty grass. It's cutty grass. And I'm asked to grass. Yeah, you're asked to grass. I don't know why there's less toilets, but totally that makes sense, right? We're kind of going about a day and washing our hands more infrequently.

Okay, I'm washing my hands more then. No, I said double break. Get some wipes. You said, you know, you've got your gloves some mornings on cold mornings like that. Pussy. I just, you know, pussy. I just realised I've got a gift for you. Do you?

But it comes with a small kind of... Caviard. Not caveat, it's just like you've just got to sort of accept its history. Okay. So you know how I mentioned on Saturday night? I went out to town in Christchurch. Felt very old. Ended up going home quite early.

Yeah. So on the way home in my sober state, thinking that it was too much for me, we were like, we'll get a little pizza. I hadn't had dinner. Went to sales. sitting down at Sal's waiting for our pizza I looked down on the ground

and I was like there's a pair of gloves on the ground Oh no And I picked them up And I was like These are quality Wait so you give them to the people at sales And you say if someone comes back

Looking for gloves Dude it's like 2am in the morning It's like good quality of gloves You go back to sales These are a quality glove They have a lovely sort of Oh Waterproof top

A lovely kind of pletheret High quality I've put them through the wash They're fresh as a day's mate And I tell you what, they're for men and they're yours if you want them. Oh, my lad. So they'd be great for the scooter with all the purse on it. So I think it was an Uber Eats person, you know, who sat there waiting for a thing

because it's giving big eye on a scooter, drop it off of that. I can't believe you didn't hand them in. I'm gobsmacked you didn't hand these in. These are quality. And I just handbagged those things. And they are now clean. That place was a muck with drunk people. Right.

I see a glove. I pick it up. It's washed. And my friend, happy birthday. Thank you for your second hand Manchi prison The Z&M Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleshfallen and Haley

Slat Fawn and Haley Silly Little Poe It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little... When do you wash your pots and pans Is today's silly little pole? This comes to us because producer Shannon the minute the

like pans off the oven and the food's taken out of it off the stove top or out of the oven the food's out straight into a sink. God, that's madness, Shannon. I do that and it's fine. It's not fine. I use hot water. I'll just run the hot water.

But it's not as hot as the oven or the direct flame that's going to do. Who cares. What it can't be, your water would come out of your tap at like 50 degrees. That pans probably be northward of 200. So nonstick pans, most vulnerable. I've done my own research here, as I do with everything. Nonstick pans, most vulnerable, the coating in the middle base expand and contract at different rates. so it'll crack it or it like warps it.

That's the main thing. It's called like thermoshock. It just like the metal contracts unevenly. It'll make it go like boom. You know like oven trays? It's just like no longer sit normal. Yeah. Because it's been hot and cold, hot and cold.

Cast iron, it could break in half. Could pang it. Right. It's yeah, drastically cooling it. So when do you wash your pots and pans? Right after cooking while they're hot, 22% of people. Mm-hmm.

Put them to soak after cooking and let them, and then clean them. 42% of people. But that still implies that it's going into a sink. Yeah, that's what I'd do. Wait until they're cooled down fully then claimed 36%.

Yeah. That's me. Yeah, I got cast iron. You've got to respect cast iron. My respect and love of cast iron, more on that after 8.30. Long teas. Long teas.

I couldn't be bothered with cast iron. It was this all too much? I just like non-stick. I don't care about the cancer bits that fall off in you eat. Cancer bits. You know, like... You won't drink.

Coke Zero. Literally told us yesterday how bad Coke Zero is for us. We'll cook on a Teflon pan every day. Wild behavior. Despite the cancer bits. Lucille said my $4 pan came with instructions to let it cool before cleaning. Otherwise, the middle will warp. You don't need to tell me twice.

Yeah, but that's a $4 pan. I'm sorry. Sometimes those $4 pans, though, and you're like, why has this been around for 10 years? I know. That last... It still serves me. I know. I have expensive cookwear and it's the worst. I regret. I hate it, so much. Kate, instantly, I'm not sitting down to eat until the plate I'm eating off is the only thing left to clean. Oh, one of those people.

She's to do the dishes as she goes. Yeah. But with a pan of the hot sink, Kate. Lou, I like watching the washing up liquid bubble in a hot pan. She's boiling it. Wow, I love that. Sam, I wait until they're cooled down because that's what mum always said. Oh, yeah, turns out mum was correct.

Mum was right. Mama was right. screenshoting these results to show my husband that I am 100% correct. So I'm guessing at 42%, which was the most, put them to soak after cooking and then clean them. Yeah, right. But you're all saying it's still too hot after cooking. It's still too hot. You've got to let it cool down.

Don't let it touch water. If you're going to be able to touch it. Yeah. That's when you know. Yeah. I actually put a little bit of water right in after cooking and then back on the stove turned off and let the warm soak through while eating. Well, would that be allowed?

or would that warp? I don't know. You're not fully submerging the pan. Kind of de-glazing it. Yeah. You know? Yeah, maybe. Maybe.

Too sizzly went hot. That says Kate, that's simple, isn't it? She just says, too sizzly went hot. Whereas Ryan's just texted and saying he likes the cool steam. He likes the steam. You like the steam, your pan. That's your pan crying. Yeah.

You're warping. Those are pan tears. Yeah. I wait till they're cooled, but it's only had a pure lazy. I have no respect with pan, said Zoe, I drop them in a cold sink the minute I'm done. That's disrespecting the pan.

Two to three business days, says Sophie. That's single life for you. Just when there's a film of moulds started. Yeah, yeah. Probably should clean it. When the raccoons are scratching at the door. Which is amazing, considering we don't have raccoons in New Zealand. Somehow the scratching at the door.

That's how bad the pan got. Yeah, they came all the way from Canada. You brought records to New Zealand. It depends on the days of the week. Tuesday, I always do it right away, but every other day my husband does the washing up, so I don't care what happens, says Stacey. Yeah, well, you should be caring if your pans are warping.

I wonder what are the structure of their week is that Tuesday's so different. Yeah. Pippa says my dad takes care of that. She's living with daddy. Oh, daddy does that. She's out doing the dishes. You're not always going to have a daddy. Believe as well.

Well, you could actually just switch from father to daddy. To daddy, yeah. So Little Pole, when do you wash your pots and pans? the most common result is you put them to soak after cooking, then clean them. The ZM Podcast Network, play ZM's Flesh forne and Haley. Man, I've been hacking down fireboxes. I've been making space. I've been putting up lockboxes.

You put some shelves up? Put some shelves up. You got a lockbox? What do you turn your house into an Airbnb? Yeah. Nah, I'm just coming and going too much. I let you know the code's 7-4-22. It's more that my neighbour.

Sometimes they have to pop over, you know. And then once you've got that key, you'll go in, there'll be another code for 724. The keys behind there. And that opens a latch, which will have a garage remote in it. Yeah. And then you open the garage and you go in there and there's the red bucket. Yep. Go in there and move the bucket.

Yeah, no, no, no. I just, you know, sometimes if I'm away for the night, it's, you know, I might stay longer or somewhere. I'm just for neighbours and stuff. I can't have everyone on my street having a key. Yeah. It's a bit open policy. It casts a sprout. But I've been doing all sorts

and feeling very accomplished and yesterday. The sun was shining. It was cold, but it was shining and just my lawns were horrendous so I was like, leh. Mine are too wet. So wet, but I just had to do it.

Okay. I just had to do it. And they look good. That's good. Yeah, you got to, yeah, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, good on you. I just figured that out on my own. But I was like,

feels like I need to keep this higher. Yeah. And it looks way better. Okay. So I'm doing the hedges, the lockboxes up, the showers around. I've been sanding. I've been sanding filling whole.

I've been painting and I'm just feeling accomplished and I just look and I turn it and I look at my hedge and I think bloody hell that thing is a shambles I have this hedge, it's very long hedge it's my hedge but the neighbours get the top of it you know and it's sprouts

it's just it's not a fancy hedge it's just got all bits and sprouts and stuff and I just wasn't my job but I'm single you know so now it is my job and so I had to I asked Vaughan can you come over and do my hedge because Vaughn's done the hedge before

in the past. Did a really good job. Yeah. Really good job. And I was like, let's do that. I got, you know, your handheld situation. Yeah. He sort of sculpted it.

Yeah. He sort of sculpted it. It's what I plan to do when this all goes tits up. Hedges. Hedges. Yeah, he does a nice hedge. He also did my little mini hedge at the front. It was beautiful.

And I was like, that's a super so requiring. You know, I think his friends have really been there for each other over, particularly the last couple of years. And I was like, he'll do that for me. Do you think that's going to pay your mortgage? Some hedges? Hedges. Oh no, I'll live in a caravan.

Oh, okay. I'll drive around the caravan. On the property whose hedges being tripped. Yeah, right. You pay me to the hedges and I also get to park on your front lawn for a night. Oh, so you live on their lawn. Yeah, I like doing their hedge. Interesting.

I take my time, okay. Flat fee, though. Yeah, flat fee for hedges. Yeah. Anyway, I reckon I asked him at the beginning of summer. It's been a long-running joke on the show. It has been a fun. I'm running out of those hedges.

But yesterday I was like, I'm done. I'm sick. I'm not sick of. I'm just sick of looking at them. And here I am accomplishing so much. Let's go. As an independent woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

I get my rickety little ladder. And I get, put it on the thing, and I send a photo to you guys, guess what I'm doing? And you've got a way bit of ladder. I don't know why you were using that rickety little ladder. Because the heavy ladder, so heavy. It's heavy, but it's such a good ladder. God, it's so like.

Must get that ladder back off you, actually, because my head just need to do it. Yeah, right. Have you had that thing for almost 18 months? I reckon that's been at you all funny. So I put my rickety little ladder because that's the one that I can do. And I was like, I reckon I've got a huge trimmer in here somewhere. And I see it up on the wall.

Yep. I kept that. So I get it down. First thing I notice, shit, it's heavy. Because I used to have one that was like a battery little. I was like, that's perfect. This thing's a plug-in. Oh, okay.

Yeah, right. Oh, my God. A plug-in head trimmer. Holy moly. I cut through the cord once and I was younger, and it went. But then it blew the fuse in it. But man, I was terrified. It's hard, though, because you don't have any sockets in your hedge.

No, sockets in the hedge. Sockets on the deck, so I'm running a cable, mate. Right. Okay. I'm running a cable from the house, from the deck down to the thing. I wouldn't have thought about that. I wouldn't have thought of that. You would have caught an electrician and got him to install a couple of power points in your hedge.

I would have done that, yeah. What's it going to take to get a bloody socket in the hedge here? And I get up on the ladder and it's so heavy. This thing's really heavy. and it's like you've got it's like a big one I'm worried about you it's a big one and I and I have it

the little blades go like this the first thing I immediately recognises this thing is blunt oh you got to keep them sharp and you gotta keep them sharp in these little spokes because I've got one of those knife sharpeners in the kitchen and I was like maybe I just get one of those on there

well I've got a like a file a flat file and you sit it on I always sit it on like a bench and you file down my god So that would be tough one way. I'm going to add that to the list of things I'm waiting on Vaughn to bring over. You don't have to do it for long. I was doing, I was trying to get the top, you know,

because it's got a line, and I'm trying to get the top. And I could get the fluff, but the hard ones that have maybe grown a bit too long because I've been waiting for six months to get these. For Vaughn to come over. For Vaughn to come over and do it. They've thickened up. They've thickened up and it just wouldn't have it. So I'm on top of this ladder, alone, sort of swinging.

And I was like, I wonder if I could kind of hit it. Like, axe it? Yeah, like, oh, it's accent with the blunt blade. And it just wasn't having it. So the hedge still looks dreadful. So when I say, I've done my own hedge. You try. I'm just living on my calendar here.

When I've got some time. It's just, it just feels like it's... Pretty busy today. You said the other day you were spending a lot of time playing a video game. Oh, yeah, great games. Great games. I hate to take that away for the inconvenience of the 10 minutes of time to come and finish me. I've got one on tomorrow's no good.

Big day tomorrow. Tuesday's out. Monday, we'll got staff, man. See, do you know what I mean? Now it's spring. No, Wednesday. Now it's spring and the hedger is really going to take off. Yeah.

Have you thought about paying someone? This is where I'm at. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. I'm going to pay someone. I'm selling that hedge trimmer. Because it's not used to me. It's so bloody heavy.

I can't wield for that. You need a little lady. I need a little lady one. You've done a great job advertising it. It's heavy. It's corded. It's blunt and it doesn't do the job. Yeah.

How much? 400 Done The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleth Fawn and Haley Producer Shannon's

Unpredictable history Shall we get a little bit more cultured shall we Because everybody's Talk about the Odyssey at the moment You guys haven't seen it Yes no No not yet moment

Oh no No No That's true That was him Not yet to bubby No No

Brian Brian. Who said to me the other day, Giggity? And I was like, holy molly. Holy molly. Is that mad? No, I said something and you two misheard it as Giggity. Oh, right.

And then you see why you're saying Giggity and I said it wasn't. And then I leaned in and I was like, maybe I will say Giggity. Maybe Giggity's back. Sorry, listen, we were trying to have a classy break. We've already derailed it with a bit of Giggity and Brian. Come in Brian. Our producer, Shannon, if you've just joined the show, welcome. Now, Shannon is, she lives in a house that we call Meth Manor.

She comes up with these ridiculous hacks. sometimes could come across as perhaps quite flighty. Well, and loves her reality trash television. Loves her trash. But we'll always end the day with some history, falling asleep to YouTube documentaries and videos. Do you know what? Nothing gets her to sleep like a beheading. Oh, I love it.

It loves the story of Henry the 8th. I've been doing a lot of mad cow disease at the moment. I'm real into that. Nice. That's why you couldn't give blood for so long. Yeah. Fletch. Yeah.

Now, everyone's talking about the Odyssey. Yeah. Which is not historical. Well, it's a historical book. It's a historical book, but it's a story, a fable. Yeah, from climate. That's what we were laughing about, that, you know, Elon Musk has a problem with the historical accuracy of Christopher Nolan's film, but there's giants and cyclops and all sorts in there.

Yeah, like, calm down. It's a myth. Sirens and mermaids. It's very funny. Spoiler, a lot. They're mermaids. Babes. You know Vaughn loves mermaids.

You know how in cartoons and, you know, Mermaids for children. children, they wear shell bras. Yeah. Not these. Oh, they've got barnacle tiddies. No. Anyway. We've got some seeing enemies

grown on their nips. Are they nipples? They scrape the barnacles. Are they nipples seeing enemies? Perhaps. You poke the middle and it goes, bleh, yeah, yeah, that's what I was. So, but you have promised us

an unpredictable history working within the world of the Odyssey. Yeah, so the Odyssey is the second book and the Elliott is Homer's first book. Illy. Now, who's Homer? Not Simpson. And or a writer.

A writer. An ancient group. Did he not have a last name? No, Madonna and Zendaya and Shia. No one knows his last name. No, what is Shikeda's last name? Shikira. Shikara.

Shikita. Shikita. When she says it in the song, she's actually introducing herself. Yeah, right. So in the Iliad, we're kind of talking more the Trojan horse, stories and all that. And I've got a story from the I think no one's talking about enough. And I think could be the plot of another Christopher Nolan movie. Okay.

Do you want Shakira's last name now? Quickly. Yeah, quickly. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Is it obvious? Or is it, like, what the hell? Her full birth name is Shakira, Isabel, Mabarak, Ripple. Rupol's drag race.

Mibarik, Ripol. Yeah, but she goes obviously by Shakira. I can see why. No. Should we put such a Shakira on? No, it's distracting from the Iliad. Please. So the Iliad contains the story of the Trojan horse where they,

They infiltrated Troy inside of a horse and then they attacked them. Yeah, but today we're going to be talking about the famous funeral games. Funeral games? Yeah, so this was quite a common thing back then. To celebrate someone's life, they would host like a mini Olympics. There would be chariot racing, boxing, archery, and there would be running races. Are there egg sandwiches, egg salad sandwiches afterwards? What if you've got friends that aren't very athletic?

Well, you've got to work hard. You've got to honour your friend. Okay. So Archilles, the guy with the heel, famous Archelais. Brad Pitt played him back in that movie back in the day. And Troy. That movie back in that area. And Troy, 2003, 2004's Troy.

If it helps, you can imagine the characters as the actors if you want. So Archelies, his good friend, Patulas, died. And so he threw a funeral games for him. He said, let's do this. We're going to have chariots, archery and running. Now, Ajax, like Spray and Ripe, Ajax. Is that where it's named after? Yeah.

He was a very famous. I just thought it was a cleaning product. What was he known for, being clean? He was, um, he's actually called Ajax the Lesser. Do you have the Ajax jingle from the ads in the 90s? No, you're thinking of spray and wipe. Oh, I am too. AJAX spray and wipe.

I also was thinking of Patax. But then Ajax has Ajax, I'm sorry to do it, sorry, momentarily, has Ajax always own spraying wipe or was it an acquisition? I don't know. Ajax. EJax Spray and white. Isn't there, what's the jingle? There was a jingle.

Yes, there was. There was. It was a, it was a woman. And she was at the start of it. She was running around cleaning. Because guests were coming, right? And she was cleaning the whole house and were like, gling. And wipe up purpose.

I clean up every surface. And white. There we go. It's through toughest grease. It's been around since. It's fucking way back. And the buyers are very keen. So thank you.

Well, because it's the play on. Ajax spray and wipe. It was Ajax spray and wipe all the long. I knew it had a thank you. It's a play on word because Ajax is tough on Greece, which is famously like the one. Oh. Oh. What?

I never knew that. Oh my God, today I learned. That is today I learned. Oh my God. I had no idea. Do you think anyone... I thought that was quite common knowledge. Do you think anyone knew that?

Not a single person. No, no. Turn me off and turn me back on again. That's nuts. I need a reboot. That's insane. What? What a brilliant.

company name. What a brilliant brand of it. Brilliant. Brilliant. Oh my God. This day could it get better. I don't think the show's getting any better than. Yeah, I know. You get excited with history. I'm wet. There's a beat of sweat down the back of my neck.

That's incredible. Oh my God. Tough on Greece. 196. Did you have any idea? That it's called Ajax because it's hard on Greece. Tough on Greece. Greece, the country. Did anybody have...

I mean, it's obviously not spelt like Greece. the country but it's a play on words it's incredible did anybody know that 96-96 someone just texts him being like doesn't she clean the table and then fall through it no that's ACC ad Can you please find the jingle on YouTube or carry on

saying my and effing blowing we're gonna hone through this sorry sorry so Ajax notoriously quite arrogant earlier in the war he got offered some divine help and said no so the gods don't like him at the moment they're like you think you're better than us where the gods you're not the gods will smite them

Oh, do not be bit benevolent. So, at these funeral games, Ajax was about to do a running race, and he was, like, ready to go. You know, he's about to run his best run ever. Athena, played by Zendaya in the movie, is sick of his arrogance, and so what does she do to ruin the race?

What do you think she does to stop him winning a race? Sprays him in the face with Ajax spray a lot. Cleans the floor and doesn't put up a wet sign. Yeah, yeah, puts grease on the floor. No, and I'm sorry, I know we put a snow poo chat, but she put cow manure in front of him and he fell. And he slipped. He ate, like, literally ate shit.

That's where the saying kind of comes from is he physically fell over and ate shit. Are we learning so much on Shannon's unpredictable history? Alice is a blown. Guess who won the race because he ate shit? Wait, who ate shit? So Ajax running, falls into the cow manure. Oh, kill his shit. Who overtakes him and then wins the funeral race?

The cow, Zendaya. No, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You can get this. You can get this. You can get this. Someone really famous. We've been talking about all morning.

No. Odysse, audius. Odysseus. Odysseus. And this is where Odysseus really becomes a main character in the earlier, therefore becomes a main character in the audience.

So this is before Matt Damon needs to get home. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well before. So why does Matt Damon need to go home so bad? Because he's been away at war. He's been stuck on Mars,

because he was on Mars. making the potatoes. No, no, you've crossed movies. You've left the movie. Sorry, his brothers all died. And the US Army. That's saving private Ryan. He's gone off to war in Troy

and they can't get back because they don't have airplanes back then. I don't have had some movers. But the gods, Poseidon's all pissed off and stuff. We've had some movers of Matt Damon to get home, haven't we? We certainly have. He's always far from home.

Mind-effing blowing. Okay, everybody's just mind-blown. Well, thank you so much, producer Shannon. What an incredible episode of, unpredictable history. We learned a lot, didn't we? And how can the day get in now? From 1990s, the Spray and Wipe Australian ad in its entirety.

Got a call from Mr. Fryer! The kitchen looks up right from that little you do last night. Although I feel like quickly, I had to clean it quickly. With spray and wipe all purpose, I cleaned up every surface. Spray and wipes out breeze. Cause it cuts. The country The country

Kitchen sparkling clean And the buyer's very keen So thank you It's three and one Oh It was Ajax They just didn't say Ajax Yeah wow

It's called Ajax It's tough It's tough It's tough on Greece Like the country The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Flashfallen and Haley

Oh God Okay We want to know why did you drop a name Maybe it was your family name, the name of a parent. I want to know the drama behind it. Sometimes people get the double-barreled names if the parents aren't together and then they...

I don't know. I'm out of here. Yeah. I have friends that were... I have a friend that was born with their father's surname but the father wasn't really there so later in life took her mums. Oh yeah. Because you were like... That makes sense. You're the parent. Yeah. Who's a stranger, you know?

Yeah. Well, the reason we're talking about this is because a few stories in the news, Brad Pitt, you may remember a few years ago, Shiloh wanted to drop the name, Pitt from Jolie Pitt. Yes. For an 18th birthday, Zahara publicly went by Jolie

and dropped the pit a couple of years ago. Vivian did a Broadway play and got listed just as Vivian Jolie. He hasn't done it officially, but they're all... They're all cutting, Brad Pitt. So Zahara and Maddox have done the official court paperwork in the last week to remove

Pitt from their legal name citing personal reasons. Beloved Brad Pitt. Now we know of the incident on the plane, right, where he was drunk and being a bit of a dickhead and stuff and they had a kerfuffle and the divorce and all that. All of this does not reflect very well. It wasn't he great and inglorious bastards. This is the thing

with people like that. It would be weird though if your dad was adored by you know, so much of the world. Yeah. Like, we don't know him. You know the different size of it inside of him, yeah. You know what he's actually like. Yeah.

And I mean, we don't know what he's actually like. Yeah. But we can assume from this that the kids don't want anything to do with him. And then there's Tom Cruise, whose daughter, Surrey Cruz, who we have with Katie Hines. Who is like 20 now? Yeah, so they haven't been seen together, him and his daughter since 2012. There's no way she can have an iPhone, eh? Why?

Because everyone has walked past on the. and say, hey, Siri. Oh, my God. How can I help you? And her phone the hot, she's got to turn it off, right? Or she'd just get an opo. Yeah. Just get a Samsung.

Get a Samsung. So no one really knows what happened there. Like, they broke up Katie and Tom and then, like, Surrey's like, had nothing to do. You can get the Tom Cruise thing, right? He's a Scientologist and he's crazy, right? So she legally changed his surname. But again, great in those mission applause.

Oh, really good. And funny. Got an upcoming film. Surrey Cruz has changed her surname from Cruz to Noel, which is Katie Holmes' middle name. Right. Oh, okay. Maybe she just wants to be like...

Siri Noel. Yeah, not part of it. But maybe that was the thing. Maybe you had... Your parents gave you... It was an embarrassing name or... Yeah, you have a bit of family drama and you thought I don't want that surname.

Well, 0800 down at him. We'd love to hear from you this morning. You can text through 9-696. Did you make the decision to drop a name and why? Well, nearly all of Brad Pitt's kids and Tom Cruise's daughter, they're all just dropping the last name because they're like, I don't want to be associated with that person. And we want to know why did you drop a name?

Maybe it was a family name or a name that was given to you and what was the drama behind it? Why did you make that decision? Well, you just hated it? Yeah, maybe you just hated it. Maybe it was shame or embarrassing or had like weird connotations. Here's an interesting one. Someone replied to our Instagram saying,

my family name is small. Oh, yeah? But I'm nearly six foot tall And I've always been a bit chubby So yeah, I changed the name I changed the name Because I'm not small Yeah, that would, yeah, yeah, yeah

Would they change it to, medium? I actually don't know what they change it to Haley Jane, curvy medium Haley Jane fluctuate Someone else said I kept my family name legally But socially I go by my husband's last name So we'll just keep that one quiet

Oh, okay Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's a thing, huh? Okay, Tracy, did you drop a name? Yes, I dropped my first name and my last name. Okay, what are to the whole thing? The whole thing, why'd you start over? And, well, I was never called by my first name. I was always called by Tracy, which was my middle name.

Oh, right. And for my last name, I was born one name, and then it was changed by depot to another last name by my mother and told that was who my father was. But as an adult, I found out he was not my father. It was actually somebody else completely different. And so I went, do you know what? I'm just going to go by last name Monroe after Marilyn Monroe because I like her.

Yeah, nice. We liked her. Freshie. Wow. Okay. Tracy Monroe. I like it. Nice.

So do I. Okay. And it just has nothing to do with either of your parents. No. No. No, Munro, you just chose it. Yeah, I just chose it because I liked it and ran with it. It rolls off the tongue quite nicely, I think.

Tracy Monroe is a great. You could be a movie star actually with that name. Yeah, well, Marilyn Monroe wasn't her name. She didn't know that. She chose that. Tracy, thank you. Some messages. Ms. Monroe.

My wife and I took my mother's maiden name as her dad's family and her immediate family were not supportive of our lesbian relationship. Extended Farno on her mother's side were those, so we wanted to honor them with their support and we took that name. That's nice. That's nice.

How does the Ancestry.com family tree go when you had it with a couple of lesbians? The lesbians and a name change. And a name change. Yeah. A whole new tree? Is it a whole new tree? You know, are you familiar with the... Are you familiar with grafting?

You cut a branch up one tree and put it on the other one and wrap some glad wrap around it until it takes. Yeah. That's a bit of that, isn't it? Lovely. Tree grafting. My parents were a well-respected award win. It's totally loved by the community, blah, blah, blah,

behind closed doors, absolute shitheads. Drop the name as soon as I could. Wow. It's funny these celebrities. They're just so adored. and their kids hate them. Yeah, and you're like, you don't know him. I do.

Yeah. I know a Māori boy, whose birth name was Brian. He changed it when he was 20 to Giovanni, and he told people he was Italian. Right. To get the chicks. To get the chicks.

Okay, how's that going for him? Yeah, how's it going well? Don't I, don't I? Some Māori dude out north, rocking around town and everybody's Italian. I was like, yeah. All right, Brian. Oh, my Italian. My husband.

Yeah, yeah, Joe, bro. Chia broichi My husband dropped his dad's last name at 18 He'd never met the man And wanted to match his real family That's fair That's a good call Well someone in their heritage dropped our very

German surname after the war Can't imagine why Yeah Really? You would though I'm like No No no no

No no It's John I reckon we turn that It's just John's Someone said as a lesbian's family tree More of a bush I like that actually I like what they've done there

I like what they've done there It's good good stuff I dropped my English name And took my granddad's traditional Māori name Tirama etepo Which is named after the bed So a candle that you read the Bible by Oh lovely

Yeah With light in the dark Is another translation of it That's nice A lot of people drop in the dad's name Because like where's dad And dad's not around He's not around

So why use the name Yeah dad's not around Don't know him Means nothing to you Which I can imagine that feeling Because I feel so strongly about Sproul because I have such a great relationship with my dad that it would just be the opposite, right?

They're like, what was that name mean? I had a double-barreled name. It was my parents' last name's hyphen. When they split, I just went by mum's last name. And my dad remarried and ended up with a legit evil step-mom who tried to erase my existence from the family. Oh, okay. Wow.

So then I started going by dad's last name just to make her piss off. You can't forget me. And then that person says, also, don't call me. My baby is currently asleep on me. One answer. Oh, sorry. Sorry about that. Sorry about that.

Everybody move quietly to the door. We're sorry about what we've done to the planet, by the way. When you come of age, you're going to notice it's really bad. But again, we're doing our part because we recycle. Fletch, not so much. You want to look at a generation older than us. I listen to a podcast about AI. We're so screwed.

I wouldn't even worry about recycling. I wouldn't even worry about afterpay payments to be like at this stage. Is it that? Like, it's pretty bad. If you got dead. Don't worry about it. Just like, just keep it going to 2030. Like, your mortgage, don't even worry about repayments.

Mortgage, I'm not paying for that. That's not real debt. That's, I'm just, that's just tread and water. The ZM Podcast Network, ZM's Flesh One and Haley, play ZM. Oh damn, that, that song was Crackham. No, you can't say crack, you crack in and crack it. I said that recently. We're just about to delve into terms and stuff that you might have heard your teen,

they just say, or kids say on public transport. Yeah. And you're like, am I being roasted here? What's the story here? No, you can't say crack it. Because at hockey, I was like, step in and crack it. That's right. Remember that it's embarrassing for you because that means something else.

Okay, I noticed another thing. So when we were over in Europe, right, everyone, as boats go by, they're doing the six, seven, right? There was another one. There was another physical one that was like with their hands. And everyone, everywhere around the world was doing it. there was another physical one and I was like

Was it this? Well it was like to wave you're waving Hold your nose It's that Shannon Hold your nose and go like that And like a fish What is that mean? Shannon everyone

Oh no What is that man So if you were like at a restaurant And their kids were going past kids I'll be like this Is it inappropriate? No hand down you're actually So it's a scuba motion

Yeah But you were doing it like the old school Scoobber Jump Jam No it's like this It's just a dance move But people are just doing it And now it's kind of becoming a new, like, pose for photos.

Yeah, people were just doing it in, like, every video and every photo. Haley thought they were all laughing at her on the boat. I kept in my sniffing and being like, yeah. I've got, I smell fine. They were laughing at you. Zero 94 said my 12-year-olds in the back seat of the car quietly, and I'm like, no, at us doing this. How good is that?

We're embarrassing kids. They don't even else. I love it. I love that. I love that. 094, what's this kid's name? What's this 12-year-old's name? Oh, let's embarrass them.

Yeah, let's embarrass them. embarrass them. Yeah. Because if they're 12, probably thinking about smirchen. Oh yeah, probably having a little kiss. I had a kiss at 12.

Did you have a little kiss? Ahold. Marcus. It's called ORA boat racing. That. Jesus. Or a boat racing. Haley thought they were being

really mean to wear on the boat. I thought they were like poo. Yeah, it would. It looks like poo. Because they're doing it down there. It looks like they're talking about. It was stinky crotch. Yeah, you got to see.

And it was hot. So the sweaty crotch. Well, Hayley was sweating a lot. I did the unc test. I was given the unc test that we got 10 out of 10 and I was like, knowed it apparently that's not.

Do you reckon Clara thinks we're unks? Oh, totally. Plainfully or teasingly describing somebody as old and out of touch with modern trends. So we've proved ourselves to be unks already

because we don't know what this is. What am I though? Because I'm an aunt. No, I think it's... It transcends gender. Clara thinks we're unk. To be unk. Okay, so what are they cool TikTok

slang words that we need to know to not be cringe? Okay, quite... And Fletcher. I think if you need to know these, you are. No, Fletch, you and I will try to incorporate it into a sentence. Okay, so quiet on the creek is like, it's on the down law. Can I tell, oh, Fletch, guess what?

Quiet on the creek. Yeah, that was good. Yeah, I think it was quite good. You just, you'll farm some aura. Yeah, yeah, and you're no longer on. Yeah, I'm no longer on. Yeah. But like, keep it quiet on the creek.

Tylenol babies, kind of self-explanatory if you've kept up with. But we would say Panadol babies, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because we don't have Tylenol here. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That was where Panadol, if pregnant women took Panadol, that was blamed for autism. Yeah, right.

By the American government. So this is a new way in which we're teasing people with autism. No, no, you say it about yourself. It's a self. It's said as a self. Right. Sorry. Having a Tylenol baby moment.

Oh my God. Panadol baby. So this one I've never heard of. This is news to me. Corny on the bob. Off the bob. Are they laughing at me? Corny on the bob.

Oh my God. What does it mean corny on the bob? Well, there's this old woman, and she's like talking about corn and she's got some on the corner on the cob and corn off the bob. I think with that one, corny on the bob, we don't need to know what it means. Just start chucking it around.

Corny on the bob refers to corny on the cob. When it's off the bob, you get the idea. No, I don't. No, neither. But that's apparently enough. Cooked, we know. Cooked isn't you. I think we've been saying cooked.

New Zealanders and Australians have been saying cooked for decades. Yeah, that's cooked, man. That's cooked. So we're ahead. Actually, we invented that, so we'll take some points back on that one. NPC, also familiar with. You can say someone's like an NPCC mode. Hey, I'm 12.

This is the cringest thing I've ever heard. All right. Yeah, but you're still listening. Here you are. Still up, you probably don't even have a job. Yeah. Ha-ha, you don't have a job. Yeah.

Ha-ha, ha-ha. Your mom's taking you to school. Shane. Do you have a boyfriend? Probably not. You had to be reminded to go to the toilet. Uh-huh. Embarrassing.

Uh-huh. It's about to get... It's about to get so much. worse for a bit. I know. That's what I was going to say. Ha ha, you're in the best years of your life and you don't even know it. You're way happier than me. Play Zat M's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. Well, apparently the humble fat joke is back in fashion.

A rising comedians making self-deprecating fat jokes. Because it was no for a long time. We're body positive. We're body-neutral, body-positive. We don't shit on ourselves. We don't shit on other people's bodies. We're just, there's the least interesting thing about. We're body positive until Farmak subsidises one of the weight loss jabs. Which I'm against... Then we're taking the shortcut because that's life, baby.

I'm against the jabs until I'm not. Yeah. Which I think will be around October 1st. We're putting a hard date on it. Or payday. It's just after a payday. Is that just after a payday? She's got a couple of afterpace and then...

It's genuinely a financial decision because I don't fit a single thing in my wardrobe. Now... That's fair. That's fair. It would post you least to get the jab than it would to get all new wardrobe. Absolutely. As a woman who fluctuates between 30Ks, I've got a 30kG fluctuation band. Yeah.

My big girl clothes don't fit at the moment. You know what I'm at the heighty? You know what I'm really? I'm going to have to get in, extend the wardrobe or just get back into the ones that are already there. Have you just girlmast? The jab? I think you've gilmath the jab. Did you just girl math?

Girl math. Girl math. Girl math. Girl math. I'm going to run a girl math. Joining us, Hayley Sproul. So you think it's going to be cheaper to get the jab than it is to replace your very fast wardrobe. How much is it?

Like $500 a month? No, one of them's getting farm act. So one of them's going to be cheaper. But to get far maxed, won't you have to have diabetes or obesity? Just a good doctor. I don't have either of those, but my wardrobe doesn't fit. Anyway, fat chokes are back. I'm hanging out to what are they called pepods.

going to be on peptides. Everyone's going to be like, dude, you're right. I'll be like, it's peptides, baby. All week, we've talked about peptides. None of us know a single thing about them. Nah. I want to get the tanning. I want to get the hair peptides.

And everybody that's doing the peptides all of a sudden looks better than they weren't doing the peptides. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I need to learn about these peptides. Anyway. No weight loss injection is currently funded for public subsidy by Pharmac. While New Zealand's Drug Safety Regulated, Medsafe has approved injection brands like Woldova and Moncharro. Someone said Wagoe's 360 a month from one of our list. Well, see, that's a pair of Jane's in a top.

See, someone said, Haley, I love your clothes. I wear all your garage sale clothes daily. So I'm coming to my garage sale. I got my skinny clothes. I buy them. I'll buy them and you can buy some more. Wait, can that person sell you those clothes back? When I jab.

When you jab. Yeah, Catherine. Can we get them back? Catherine, she is going to... Yeah, she is going to need those back. I'm skinny again now. You should buy Catherine the jab. So she's too.

Just more for my place. And then she'll give you the close back because you've made for the jab. What if me and Catherine do a half jab each? And Catherine, because I've got a tiny little wardrobe. I've got a size 10 wardrobe

to a size 16 wardrobe, right? I'm in the 16 now. Jab math. She's probably in the 12. Let's jab her down. And then I'll jab down. Right, okay. We're against it till we're not.

Anyway, fat jokes are back apparently about ourselves. Right. Stop messaging about me about going on the jab, listening. Now, Vicki's going straight to peptides. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like cheaper and work. better. Less side effects.

I don't want to know about peptides. Here's the one, peptides. I'm going to try protein and gym for a little bit. Retard peptos. I can't say that more. I'm trying. Retargetide peptides, 15 a month. Yeah, but they're not regulated or anything.

Like, what is, baby? The only thing that's regulated is who is playing to be regulated, man. Margarine, man. Margarine's regulated. Margarine's got health stars, baby. So many people are just texting. singing about jabs, peptides or buying my size 10 wardrobe. Listen!

I don't want any of this. I don't want any of this. I don't want any of it. No, no, no, no. You want to bring back. I want some jokes. I want some jokes. Haley's joke of the day. Also, because I'm touring, by the way, still doing tickets for Hamilton tomorrow. That wasn't a sentence. By the way, still a few couple of tickets available for 630 Hamilton tomorrow. That's it. I've been telling jokes. Haleysprow.com.

630 Friday, Friday, Hamilton. Hell of a time to have a laugh. Yeah, man. Yeah, Haleysprow sold out. Fungare sold out If you want to see me You're going to come to Hamilton 680 It's a cold winter morning

We thought we'd get ourselves miserable Yeah and with the return of the fat joke I want the return of Haley's joke of the day You text in 966916 You can call it if it is delivery based You know you'd need to hear this out my mouth I want your best joke

We've had some in already And some of them are too inappropriate Go cat's not talking to me again As per As per Okay that's good That's good. That's good. Okay, 96, 96, texting.

Give us your best joke. Trudging through winter at the moment. Let's have a little giggle. 966. Oh, $100,000 in him if you want to give us your own delivering of your best joke. This is Haley's joke of the day. Haley's joke of the day. We've done this for ages because, man, we've got the funniest listeners.

Do we, do you award, I forget how this works, do you award the funniest? Or it's just a myriad of funny jokes? No, I think the award, and this for me, as a comedian is the best award you can get is the laughter. It's the laughter of the listener and of Fletchford and Haley. Okay, Bridgett, good morning. Good morning. How are you guys?

Really good, thanks. Now give us your best joke, Bridget. Okay, I just want to say I stole this from my best friend, so full credit to her. She's going to kill me to say it. No, no, no, no. First roll of comedy. When you see a joke, you never say. Did she invent it? Or she was just who you heard it from? No, no, she's just who I heard it from.

All right, you ready? Yeah, ready. Why do divers fall out of the boat backwards. Why do divers fall under the boat backwards? Because if they fell forwards, they'd still be in the boat. It's simple. It's simple. You know, what I like about that, points, it's clean. It's clean. You know, you can tell a joke to anyone.

Yep, you could. You could. You know. And the moment you hit the punch, like, you almost feel stupid for not realising it. Yeah, you're dumby. Thank you, Bridget. Okay, messages in. Really good. We are having to read the running with scissors one, or do you not think that's appropriate? No, I think that's really good. That's funny. It was funny. Yeah, it's funny.

Really? Wait, did you think there was inappropriate? Well, we said, we said poo-free show. Oh, yeah, okay. But no, I think it's great. Okay, go. What's worse than running with scissors? What? Cisering with the runs.

I thought you were. That's what I thought. That's what it is. Before you, like, don't read that on you? That's why I didn't think you were going to be for it. But you actually approved that. So that's you. That's your fault.

Yeah. That's your fault. This isn't even really a joke. It seems like it should be on a T-shirt. What has 182 teeth and holds back a monster? 182 teeth and holds back a monster. Yeah. What?

My fly. That's the stupid. Big, big old mate energy. Big, big, and long fly. Yeah. I'm so fat that if you try to undress me with your eyes, it would take you an hour. Because you said that fat jokes are back. Yeah, great, great.

My 11-year-old thought this was a real cracker, bust that out. The family did like it. You're so dumb. You bought curtains. your computer because it had windows. That's good. That's good. A minister, a priest, and a rabbit walk into the blood bank and the receptionist says, what type are you? And the rabbit says, I think I'm a typo.

Yeah, great. That's good. I like that. That's good, isn't it? That's really funny. Here's one reflecting the noun. My Mexican mate said he thought the Odyssey was quite a weird movie. Summed it up in two words. That was, Odesse. Yeah. It's great. I don't say that.

Can you say that? Can you say that? I don't think a white woman... I don't know if you're allowed to do it. Do you? Yeah, via Hawaii. Yeah. That's not how the...

That's not how it worked. Two robbers walk into a liquor store. One grabs a bottle of wine and says, is this whiskey? The other robber says it's not as whiskey is wobbing a bank. Yeah, that's good. That's good.

When a... When a purse... When a person gets killed by a bomb, where did they get buried? Everywhere. Is that a joke? It's terrible, long. That's just a terrible poor taste joke. This is my six-year-old's joke.

They've said it a thousand times in the last week. Why did the old man fall down the well? Why? Well, he couldn't see that well. That's really good. I like that. It's so simple. It's so funny, though.

Yeah. Yeah, that's good. Someone said the cat one's still the best. The cat one, the Asper. Yeah. You missed that. You have to listen to the podcast, even though I just told you the punchline.

My three-year-old's favorite joke, a joke from a three-year-old, what does a triceratops sit on? What does a triceratops sit on? Yeah. The ground? It's tricerobotum. This tricerobots would be better.

You literally critiquing a three-year-old comedian? Yeah. Well, I'm just saying I've got a little bit more experience. Tricerobots. Yeah. Why is it important not to buy pants made in Ukraine. Why?

Because Chernobyl fall out. That's silly. That's silly, eh? That's real silly. Oh, I'm not reading the witches on brooms, that's no. No, and eating a mandarin We're not.

We know that one. We know that one. Yes. Seven dwarves were all having a bath. That's so good. That's so good. They all felt happy. Happy got the hell out of the bath, didn't they?

My friend recently lost her front tooth. caused her to have a lisp. This was rough because she was deeply religious and was struggling with the new hole in her faith. That's good. That's really good. That's really good. Where do volcanoes fart from?

They're ash hole. That's good. That's good. What do you call a frog that can't park in the right place? What do you say that again? What do you call a frog that can't park in the right place? Toad. That's classic.

Simple. Simple. Simple. Simple. Simple. What's the number one cause of dry skin? What? Bath towels.

It took me a second. I was like, what? Because they're rough? No, because they literally dry skin. Clever. Layed. Clever. Yeah, really good.

Yeah, that's a good one. Man, some of them coming in from the regions. You can just tell. Some of them are for the regions? Yeah, you're too comfortable with their racism? There's it, yeah, right. Oh, they'll love this. That doesn't fly in the big smoke, I'll tell you that.

We can't say that. Oh my God, did I tell you my dog Minton, I'm swallowed my shuttlecock? Bad Minton. That joke. Bad Minton. That was really good. That's the best one. That's the best one.

That, that's the best one. That is, yeah, that's my favourite so far. That's really good. Oh, God. There's so much filth coming in. Oh, this year. I blame you. Some of them will take a look at the time.

It's 25 past 8. We can't be reading that out on the bloody old. We've got another three-year-old here. Another three-year-old in Love's dinosaurs. What do you call a blind dinosaur? What? Do you think he saw us? That's good.

That's good as well. I like that. Good stuff. Well, thank you for your jokes. Wait, wait, wait, wait, one more. What's Forrest Gump's Netflix password? What? I know this one.

One Forrest one. Oh, yeah, that's good. It's good. It's really good. Yeah, it's good. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flashawn and Haley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Well, today, do. Today I want to talk about a very unlikely place that has been established as still massive with tourists, unlike anywhere else in the world, and is only there because of the salt trade. Oh, okay. Any guesses? It sits at the very top of the Adriatic Sea. Oh, my favourite sea. Of all the seas. Runs up the calf of the boot that is Italy.

I'll just get there then. It's Venice. Oh, Venice. It's Venice. Okay. So I didn't know this, but Venice harvested its own salt. It had these massive, because it's a lagoon, that's why it is what it is. The water levels have gone up significantly since it was first.

But it's on the poles, right? Yeah. It's on the poles and they're in the ground and cruise ships can't cruise in and out anymore because the waves come in and are wrecking like this legendary city built on piles. Romantic? I've never been. Oh, my God, it's incredible. It's amazing.

In COVID when nature returned to the Venice canals and like dolphins were there? A dolphin went out. And the water went blue? Because there was no boats. Yeah. Yeah. Wasn't that fake? No.

Didn't it come out of a couple of weeks after that? No, nature returned. Did nature? Nature is recovering because everything got shut down. Yeah. Well, they made, the initial money of Venice was made by a massive evaporation pans in the lagoons. And then there was some floods and they worked out that they, with the money they had,

they could actually make more money of buying and selling salt. than harvesting it and they were kind of the gateway into Europe. So they began importing cheap, core salt from across the Mediterranean from Cyprus, Sardinia. Oh, it's just there.

And of course you can't have sardines without salt, can you? No. And North Africa and sold it as a massive markup. Right. So they became like this specific salt port. I had no idea that Venice had anything to do with salt. I thought it was just masks and art.

And love and love and boats and gondolas. And salt. And salt. And salt. Yeah, and salt. A lot of salt. salt. Everything comes back to salt. They had this ruthless monopoly over the salt supply of southern Europe and the Adriatic Sea. They were kind of like the centre point between the people that had it but couldn't sell it and the people who wanted

it but couldn't get it. And that's how monopolies are formed. Wow. Okay. So they were the first I want me one of those. They are monopoly on something. I'm not sure what. I'm anti-monopoly till I'm not. I'm anti-monopoly till I've got one. Till I've got one and then on my hand. Then I'm pro-monopoly and I'll say things like free market and let the market decide, but I've got a monopoly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got a monopoly. So in the 1460s, the salt office of Venice was solely responsible for funding,

Renaissance art, giant marble palaces, and military fleets that kept their salt. So I'm making all the money out of it. And then it kicked off. We don't have time right now to go under the salt walls between Venice and the other Italian rivals. And they think it was kind of the start of the organised crime. Is Venetian salt a thing? Like is that still a thing that you'd get Venetian salt? I don't know if it still is, but it was off.

They were like buying the cheap salt and then just selling it to people. They were getting the salt cheap, selling it expensive as like, you know. It's like those people that buy import stuff from Timo and sell it for eight tons of price. Drop shipping. Yeah, their original salt drop shippers. It wouldn't be really. Drop shipping salt. It wasn't really drop shipping because it was coming through their ports versus going straight to the person who purchased it.

Yeah, right. Right, right. Not a full drop ship situation. Well, you've got to put your own sticker on it. Yeah. soul. Yeah. But if you've ever been to Venice,

no, all of that nice stuff, masks, romance, gondolas, men in fancy hats, sexy Italians, only there. Overpriced food in tourism. Overpriced food.

Crowding. Yeah. Yep. And that one dolphin that went up there in 2020 and it was like, man, it's quite up here. It's all because of salt.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Do-Dip, do-dip-d-d-do. Do-d-do. The Z-N Podcast Network. Is this a show real?

Play Z-N's Flesh, Forn and Haley. There's a few things you need to know about me, Vaughn-Smith. That's you. That's me. Vaughn-Smith, you need to know about me to get the crux of this yarn. Yeah. I love cast iron. And I can't explain it.

I love steel things. I get it. I love cast iron cooker. I love getting an old rusty one that someone thinks bugged. Well, jokes on it. on them soak in a vinegar and give it a wire brush and a heavy sand

and then an oil and a re-season and you got yourself a beautiful pan that'll last generations Yeah, lovely. Love cast iron. I just love a non-stick from briskos.

Call me old passion. The cast iron was all too much for me. You know people are like I always get Fletch and Vaughn confused. Vaughn's the guy that looks like he likes cast iron pans and that he can't have sex. Fletch's got big teflon energy.

Yeah, I can't have sex and I love cast iron Fletch nail sex every time but he's going to die of teflon cancer. Yeah, yeah. That's sort of that's a frame. Well, yeah, As I said later, like the AI end of the world's coming.

It's coming anyway. It's coming anyway. So don't worry about TEPA. Imagine if the only thing that can defeat IA is cast iron. And I never know. It's like that movie signs. So you've got to know that about me. I mean, they're heavy.

They're good. I went on a hike with some mates. And in a dock hut, we found a cast iron pan. And I was like, I'm not leaving that here. That's a great cast iron pan. But it was heavy. But it was heavy. Nah, we left one of the shitty pans.

We purchased from like the $2 shop on the way up and took the cast iron pan. And my friend Johnny carried it out. So the pan was forever known as the Johnny Nippet Memorial Department of Conservation Peach Cove Tramp Pan. Right. That's a full name. Yeah, lovely. Gorgeous.

So that pan, gorgeous. And took it home, seasoned it. It's a great pan. Then I'm in a shop one day and I see its exact twin. Oh, I love that. So I buy that. Yeah, nice. And I clean it up and I resison it and I give it to Johnny.

Now he's got one too. And then it becomes a thing. All the lads that went on the trip. Get a pan. I'm going to get one of these pans. So yesterday on Facebook Marketplace. Because I'm always searching. You're going to alert, do you?

No, it was at the top because it knows I love cast iron. It's like cast iron pan. Mangare, 50 bucks. And there's a picture of it. I'm like, that's a deal. It's a triplet to the Johnny Nimbabba. But I messaged the guy, I'm like, done. Tell me when you're home.

Yeah. He's like, I'm not home now. I'm out getting a warrant of fitness. Now that's, if that's not the most marketplace thing response you ever get. Yeah. Apart from is the silver sale, which is a button that's far too easy to hit when you're in the marketplace tab of the Facebook. Eyes are still available.

Eyes are still available. Which is super annoying if you have listed something on there and I fully understand that, but I didn't mean to hit the button. The other one is I'm not home right now and I'm like, that's okay, let me know when you get home from the Warren of Fitness. It's so far away from your home.

I know, so far away. So I don't want to leave work because it's closer. So I hang around and then this guy messages me to say, I'm back from the Warren of Fitness. Right. And I said, hold it, I'm on my way, I'm going to get cash out. I put in it, I say, where is it?

What's the address? He gives me the road address. And I'm like, that's familiar. Because it's exactly. exactly the same address that lured me to Mangare about three years ago chasing two other cast iron pans. Wait, so this guy, what's his deal that he has these pants? He just loves, I don't know if he searches for cast iron. So you've been to this house before?

And I've got the runaround of my life. Yeah, I remember. I'm at the house and he's like, I am five minutes away. And then five minutes later, I'm like, hey, mate, are you far away? Like, send him a picture. I've got the cash in hand. He's like, just stop for somebody to eat. Why don't you go get somebody to eat?

I'll meet you at the house and half an hour. Don't tell me when to eat. So I don't tell me to eat. stranger. Don't tell me when to eat. We're on different clocks, homie. And then I finished getting somebody to eat and I say, okay, I'm on my way back. And he's like, I've just popped out. I was like, wait, so you were home.

But now you've popped out. He's like, yeah, I'll be home in another couple of hours. I'm not hanging around. I don't have the Mangare connections to spend a couple of hours. Oh, Vaughn, what have you done? You can go for a nice walk along the water, but that's about 10 minutes. I'm very far from that part. You're talking Mangare Bridge.

I'm in the bridge. I'm in East. You're on Montgier. I'm in the heart of Montgier. Yeah, right, right. Some would say, a purist would say, Monge is Montgier. Yeah, Montgears, Mongear. So I'm like, and I'm driving.

I'm like, man, this all feels really familiar. This right, and I turn it on to the road. I'm like, oh, my God, it's a good, the exact house. Yeah, I mean, it shouldn't really come as a surprise. It's in the same suburb and it's its same item. No, and there's a lot of people in a world. I reckon Monga day is a big cast iron community. Yeah, yeah, totally.

We're snobs. Yeah, we're cooking it over big gas burners and stuff. You've got a seasoned it, don't use soap on it. You know, people get all. Yeah, so I pull up, I get out of the car, and there he is. He's home. He's home, he's sitting there. I'm like, I'm here for the pan.

He's like, I thought you might be. And I said, I came here a couple of years ago to get some pans. Why don't you make it weird, won't you? I said, we sit, and he's like, you would have been dealing with my uncle. That's who taught me how to restore the cast iron pans. Oh, okay, right. Well, he's pre-restored it. Yeah, no, it's this one's oiled and everything.

This is ready to go. is ready for delivery to one of the boys for the cast iron crew. Doesn't it have all in a little touch you, don't know. I said, wow, your bloody uncle gave me the, and I started telling him the story, your bloody uncle gave me the runaround. No, no, no, no, no.

He was waiting for it, waiting for it. Uncle gave me the runaround, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And he's like, oh, yeah. He was going through a lot then. And I was like, oh, God. And he's like, yeah, he's dead now. And I was like, Oh, mawn, what did you do that for?

Why'd you even bring it up? Respecting the tape. Because I was just like, Go! Nobody wants you at their house when it's a marketplace and get out. Then I told him the whole story about how the pan's really important to me because it's identical to the ones that I got. Shut up!

You're worse than me! And he's like looking at me nodding and I'm like, he hates this. I'm trying to make him forget the fact that I was just like, your uncle's a useless piece of shit. Yeah, yeah, got him. Ran me around, told me to yeah, he was going through it. Yeah, now he's dead.

He's like, it was about then that it was all really happening. And I was like, God, all that I'll signal anything. Why did you keep talking? Why didn't you shut up? I mean, exactly why I'm still talking now. This is a problem of mine. If there's a bit of awkwardness, I'm like, well, I guess we'll just fill this with some chat. It's a special pan to me and my friends.

Me, my friends went on a legendary hank to Peach Cove up north of Fangare. Cool, bro. I'm giving you a pan to 50 bucks, eaf off. My friend Johnny took the pan. Anyway, I love the pan. Cooked in it last night. Man, it's a good pan. Wait, you pre-cooked a meal in your gift pan.

Yeah, I'm going to resean it. This guy is too much. You're off. Play Z-N's Fleshhorn and Haley. I haven't been on like a girls trip for a while, but two of my friends are on a girls trip right now. They're in New Caledonia, just having a little getaway. That's nice.

I know. I've never been. That's an o-la-la-la girls trip. It's Ola-la, I know. They just both had a break in their calendar. The two of my marching friends and they've had busy times and they just went, should pop to. Girl's trip.

Girl's trip away. That's cool. My besties coming up soon to stay with me, a little girl's trip like to my house. And we're going to do movies and wine and gossip and that kind of stuff. My girl's trip is flying into Auckland today and then driving down to Hamilton for Haley's show tomorrow with the girls. Oh, how nice. We'll come and say hello and have a little huan.

Hran with me. Have a quran. Well, apparently the new girls trip for 2026 is what all the girlies are doing. You're getting your group together, getting the group chair. Come on, we need a girls trip. We're not going to an island. We're not going to a bar. We're not going to a winery.

We're going to a sports game. We're doing sports trips. Oh, okay. Now, typically, see, there's like a lads trip, right? My dad did a big, um, went over to the Masters Games with some lads. Went over to Shanghai once for some squash, you know. Went to Birmingham for some tennis with the lads. Your dad went on a squash.

My dad's a squash player. He was big, right. We knew this. Yeah, but I knew that. But you don't go to an international squashy. Yeah, they did you. And he's done the, you know, the Rugby World Cup. You know, the lads get together, you know, friends for 40 years.

Well, a lot of the girls. are doing the F1 now. The girls are doing F1 weekend in Melbourne. Because also F1 has Formula 1 has like really nice locations. I think you were going to say hot drivers. Petit for me.

They are. I think they've got to be a bit small to fit in, eh? You know I like a boy with a gut to be honest. Like a bit of chunk. But yeah, Formula 1 but then Monaco. You know like there's lots of amazing locations for that. US Open a lot of people like went to New York City for a bit of a splurge like this.

You do the darts if you like a chomky guy. Dude, I want to go to the darts so bad. So bad. I would love to. That's your ideal sportsman. Yeah. They've got a beard. No, those guys that do the heavy lifting, you know those heavy lifting games?

The strong men. Did you say, at the Commonwealth Games, I can't remember her name and that's really bad, but she's 18 years old, our Kiwi weightlifter and she just got fourth place at 18. That's crazy, eh. Weightlifting. She must love Legday. I hate Legday. Legday is like...

The days are the worst. It's just so heavy. Yeah. And I'm just like, eh. I want widdle one. But yeah, this is the new girls trip, getting together and being like, let's go watch a game somewhere.

It's still a destination. We're still going to have drinks and stuff. Yeah. But the game is at the heart of it. That's what all the girlies are doing. We love that. We've been saying, we need a girls trip. We want to go down to Christchurch.

To the new Takaha Stadium. Oh, yeah. So you just any kind of girls trip for anything there. For anything. For anything. At the stadium. Anything. Yeah.

Just any one game. sports, Adelie men are playing and we'll have fun and we'll go. The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Flashawn and Haley. Does it have a piano in your house growing up? No. Of course they did. Yeah, because you played the piano.

Yeah. No, if you had a piano in your house, you were rich. No, you weren't. No, no, no. No, you knew an old person that had to go into a retirement home and they Yeah, I got a dead woman's piano. They couldn't get rid of the piano. I only got a, I have four pianos growing up and they got better as I got better. Like we weren't, you only...

And did you ever have more than one piano at a time? Two ones. Two pianos at a time. We had one piano in the house growing up. And for years after anybody stopped playing it, it just became like a shelving unit. They just do. In the kitchen. Why would your parents with two boys have a piano?

Mum played a little bit of piano. My brother played the piano. They thought it was very important to learn an instrument growing up. Oh, it is. It's very helpful. Links the brain and stuff. Yeah. And my sister played the piano for a little bit.

Okay. And I do believe it was my uncle. piano and he went into retirement home so that's how we got it just got so heavy i remember the rigmarole of getting it up the stairs into the house like it was so and then it was too heavy to move so it so it just sat there unused forever and never gets churns and they was recently telling somebody about this and they said never would have pictured you as a piano family and i said it was one of those things that sat in the house unused and we got talking about they had a family bible not a single person in their family was remotely religious oh wow but the family bible sat out there yeah and i'm just like it's weird that

we used to have these things in our houses that nobody used. Like treadmills. You got from an infamials. Oh my God, yes. The Ab King Pro. And I've got to fold it up and put against the wall the treadmill. Is that a treadmill?

People would be like, is that's what I hang motel on. Oh, yeah. Or that in the moment, whatever it is, machine that Briscoes is selling, that we all made. Popcorn maker. A pie maker or a popcorn maker. People went crazy for those popcorn makers.

You were like, you just put it in a pot. It's just a pot. You've got a pot. It's like, I think anything. Ninja makes. We've got to have it. No, hang on. How often do we use the slouchy machine?

During the summer, I used it a lot. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, the ninja creamy though. You're like, what? You make an ice cream every week? What did I see Ninja making the other day? And I was like, what the Ninja Jucer? It's good.

Ninja Jucer. And there was a Ninja something else. It's like, they've got us again. Yeah, they make great stuff. They do. They're clever with their stuff. But that's what I want to know this morning. What sits in your house unused?

Because I don't feel like, like, pianos and stuff, we just don't have them. as much anymore. Like there's less of that sort of thing but appliances are definitely There'll be so much crap. There's a few more appliances that don't get used. People buy it,

expecting to use it like exercise bikes and tread mills. Whatever it is, 0800 dials at M, give us a call. You can text through. 966. What is that thing in your house that just doesn't get used?

I wonder if there's many people messaging it about China cabinets. Oh, do my mum and dads, China cabinet is? All this stuff has never been used. You just don't use it. You're not allowed to charge you. It's like, what is it for?

I know, like you go over. for a dinner or family Christmas and they're like you just need one more plate or one more glass and there's one sitting there. No, no, I've got a plastic one. Yeah. No, no, don't touch that. That's for a good thing. You're like, well, it's Christmas.

That's a good thing. This is the good thing. Tracy, what sits unused in your house? So back in the 80s, dad got onto this fitness thing and he decided he'd buy himself one of those old 10-speed bikes. It was brand new when he bought it.

He rode it twice and then decided it was all too hard. And so it sat propped up in the front of our entryway. And mum put plants in front of it. And it was sat there for so long. All the plants had grown through the spokes of the bike. Oh, my gosh. Wait, is it still there to this day?

Well, it was there for about 20 years. I shit you not. That is true. Oh, my God. That's so good. I kind of love that. I love it. I love it.

Yeah. It would actually be cool to have that in your house now. Yeah. It was like a family joke. And to this day, my siblings and I still talk about it. I talked to mum about just the other day. We were laughing. We were just like, my God, can you believe it's sat there for 20 years?

And we just, we didn't move it. And these plants just looked beautiful. And it was this reddy colour that matched the horrible burnt orange carpet we had. So it was, you know, as well. You're talking real 70s, 80s kind of vibes. Decor. House decor. And that's also a sign of how nature will take over once we're gone.

I know, like those documentaries. It grows through everything. Yeah, it does. Tracy, thank you. Holly, what sits unused in your house? The soda stream machine I begged my husband for. Do you know, I have one and I use mine all the time, especially in summer. Mine ran out of gas, babe, and so I just can't be bothered.

Well, mine did come with the two gas bottles originally because I told them I was going to use it so often, but I've had it for over a year and I still have those two gas bottles. Well, I'll take those off your hands if they're the pink ones. Yeah, if they're the pink one. The pink ones are... Because they change. They change to the pink ones.

Did they change to the pink ones? I said I need them. It's going to help me drink way more water and I'm going to use it to make mixes for cocktails. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. That's what we had the other night. Didn't we've only had some Hugo Spritzai.

And I pumped a couple of farts of the soda stream. Yeah. I've got a soda stream when I just go and get a shweeps. Every time. Every time. Holly, thank you. Some messages in. There's a clothes steamer in.

My room takes up my small side of the wardrobe, says Brian. If Haley wants it, it's hers. Clothes steamer. He's trying to offload you. I'm actually storing two of those in my garage. You've got two steams. She steamed up, Brian. As you were, my friend.

I've got a Kmart steamer at sitting in the storage. Yeah, it's a good stuff. Had a gym membership was never going. I thought the problem is I have to leave the house. I'll get a full gym equipment set up in the garage. That's not been used. I think it might be my complete lack of discipline. It would have been nice in lockdowns to have that, though.

Yes. I had a bit of a gym set up. It was a savior, save you. Lots of people saying since they got married, their penis is the unused item in the house. Just use yourself. Yeah, I reckon don't let that go to waste. I say post separation, I used mine more than ever.

Your penis. Your penis? Yeah. Yeah. Is that something you want to tell us? Wow, okay. Okay, yeah, right. Great.

Someone said the ninja slush machine had to have it, didn't I. Had to have it. It's so good, though. Had to have it. Had to have it. Well, we share it. We get a good use out of it. We get good use out of it. Yeah, if you share it between

friends, that's good. Someone's here, a T-2 E-A-T-R-T-R-T-R-T-R-T-R-T-R-T-P. T-2 was the T-C company, wasn't it? Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, the fancy T-T. There might have been E-R-Trap. E-R-A-Trap. I have a few beautiful sets with a teapot

and matching teacups. So there you go. Yeah, people used to get the pots and stuff. You go, oh, thank you. It's just too pretty to get wrecked or chipped, so it doesn't get used, it just gets looked at. Now we tried to call that person. They message us back. Loll, sorry I know you just tried to call me.

I'm actually at a funeral. I've got my AirPods and I'm listening to ZDM online because this funeral is very boring. They're listening on I Heart Radio, Radio, I believe. Fantastic KPI. And what a fantastic example of listening to ZM anywhere you go. Take us with you at where you go. That's actually with three KPI's because she's at a funeral.

Fantastic. Sorry for your loss. I can't talk. We said, sorry to have bothered you. They said, I didn't like this auntie anyway. So they're passing some time. I tell you what, if you've just had a loved one die, and you're not looking forward to the dreariness

that is the funeral, and it's a morning funeral, laugh out louder. Fletcher and Haley live at the funeral. I guess I've always thought when we say take us with you wherever you go. I never anticipated being in the pocket of a funeral. No, I never thought of you. I never thought a funeral either.

I hope there's some good food at the way. Can we get a 905? Can we get a red hot? What kind of funeral are we out? Are we out of church funeral or the tonguey? Is it like a long sort of situation? Yeah. We're Christian, or we?

What are we? Yeah. And are there asparagus rolls? Also, bloody early in the day for a funeral. That's what I was thinking. Well, yeah, but you got that might have been a sleep over a tongi situation. You're the early booking. Yeah, cheaper.

Cheaper cremation before 12. It's an off-pick discount. It's an off-pick discount for gas, isn't it? Or they could be using the free hour of power. Yeah, power shops. Because that's what I like to be my cremating. Electric Kiwi. That's where he does all of his cremations.

Just. all of them on at once. Yeah. And then just sprinkle the ashes into five boxes. Yeah, yeah, and then put them down the shoe. Five, four, three, two, one. Flick them, flick them. Go, go.

You are 23 minutes into your free hour of power. Yeah. I hope that body is crisping up. Because otherwise, you don't want a free... Shut, man. You're still getting the hard. You're still having the door. You're letting the heat out.

If we are looking, it ain't cooking. Leave the door shut. I watch pot never boils. We build a new house and bought all of the melee appliances. Oh. Including a steam oven. Pass on. That steam oven has been used four times in five years.

Yeah. We have since separated. I no longer live there and it still remains unused. We tried to sell it on marketplace. No one wants a stupid steamed oven. No. Sort of what do we state, you know what I mean? What do you steam?

I think my partner's eyes have never been used because the house is a mess and they don't seem to see that mess. I'm happy to be the outlet for you today. Rory's messaged in. If she's listening to Z, ZM at the funeral, you better make sure there's no dead air. Good for Murray. That's a little bit of an insight.

That's where you're listening to the radio and nothing's happening. There's been some sort of mistake, some sort of technical error. I feel like should we sing, you know, like what do you want? How great are old? No, no, that was at the nearest funeral. It's at every funeral. Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley. This is a great debate and I would love to partake.

So there's two sides of this argument here. One is the death of the house guest. Okay. And one is the benefit of the doorbell friend. They are on either side of the spectrum. So start with the house guest, right? This is the person who gives you a little call and says, hey, I'm in the area.

Yeah. Can I come and stay? Oh, come and stay, not just to come to... Or I'm coming up for the weekend or I'm in town for a night or two. It's the couch free, free, it's a spare room or whatever. Fletch, you've accommodated many of our friends over the years in your spare room. Well, yeah, I love it. It's great.

Couple of days. Couple of days. A couple of days. Well, Gen Z in particular is saying, no, thank you. I mean, I'm shocked they have a house to share. But they're saying, no, this is my safe space. This is my sanctuary. I don't actually want anyone, no matter how close you are to me, friend, family, whatever,

to come and stay in my space. This is where I unwind. Is this an argument that started in New Zealand, Australia? It has, because I feel like we're very accommodating. We love someone on the couch. This is Australia. Okay. Yeah, they're saying 60% of Aussie travellers in particular now would just immediately get a hotel in an Airbnb if they were travelling into a different town where friends lived.

They wouldn't even consider going, oh, I could just stay at Fletches or I could just stay at Vaughns or whatever. Even though it's free. Yeah, even though it's free. And I kind of get this as someone who's like, I want to spend the time catching up with you. But at the end of the day, it is nice to go back in my own quiet space. 100%. So one side of the internet is saying, hell yeah, get out of my house, please go away. that's stressful. The other side,

this other article, which was about the doorbell friend, they're saying we need to make more space for doorbell friends and less space for friendships that need structure. So say you've got friends that are like,

take, you know, a thousand hours to plan a catch-up and you find, you know, it feels like a big heavy thing. The benefit is the doorbell friend, someone who just like, Bing-Bong, hey, what's up?

I'm in the neighbourhood. Let's catch up for 15 minutes, have a drink, have a coffee, have a tea, then I'll leave. Yeah. And you're like, best kind.

Those are the best kind. We're just like, oh my God, I've got an hour to kill. Yeah. Bing bong. Or like, you know, come meet me here. Quick little doorbell friend.

A little textie. But that is making the people who are like, no house guests, panic even more. Because the idea of someone's doorbell ringing or your door knocking and you're not prepared. Or even just an hour's notice, a text. Yeah. Your place might not be nice. Yeah, I think you're a bit. Because some people get a bit like they, oh, I've got to clean up.

Dude, it was me yesterday. As we mentioned earlier in the show. It's a mess. It's a mess. It's a mess in here. If someone came around, I'd be like, no. Yeah. No, you can't look in.

Yeah. I think I'm more houseguest, team house guests, like yes, come and stay in my house in a structured manner. Yeah, come for a couple of nights, but not a wait. Then I am for, if you just surround, feel free to knock on my door and like, come on over. Yeah. I don't like that. No, because I'm like to plan my day. Yeah, I planned my day.

And all of a sudden, you're putting my day out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and you're just sort of here and I'm wearing whatever I'm wearing. And, yeah, no, thank you. Well, of course you guys are welcome at my house anytime, especially if you want to trim my hair. Well, I've got to come do those hedges. Okay, if you had to rate, review or marry, Fletch, Vaughn or Haley, what one would it be? Okay, I would marry Haley.

I would have sex. Wait, which one is it? No, no, no, no, it's only rate, review, marry. Oh, okay. No comment. Have sex with the podcast. I don't know how that would work. Give us a sexy little review, though.

Play Z-M's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley.