ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 31st January 2024

Episode Date: January 30, 2024

Silly Little Poll!  Top 6: Colours of Kindness  Taylor Test  Aaron didn't want help  New Emojis  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Grab any medium cafe hot coffee for just $4. Only in the app. Ends Feb 9. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Two minutes past six.

Kia ora. Kia ora, kia ora. Happy Wednesday. Happy hump day. Happy hump day. So two weeks, that means what? Two weeks until the new season of your podcast is out. Yes.

And Valentine's Day, two weeks away. Valentine's Day. Yeah, we recorded another episode yesterday. Exciting. We're also thinking of having some celebratory drinks on the 14th. You're all invited. Is that a Wednesday? Yeah.

And a drink of home. And it's Valentine's Day. And it's Valentine's Day. And it's Valentine's Day. Yeah. We all spend it together. Oh. Because of the love we share. There's a lot of love here.

There's a lot of love. Sure, sure. Silly little poll on the way. Are you team liquid soap or team pube bar? Now, I will say, I had a shower at a friend's house the other day, and she said, look, I use bar soap. I got you a fresh bar. It was quite fun.

Was it a nice bar or like a... I think it was just a dove. I think it was a dove. Okay. Quite a nice bar. Okay. It was an interesting experience. Well, we'll get into the rather one-sided,

silly little poll results soon on the show. Oh, really? I haven't looked. Coming up on the show also is the top six. Now, Cray, I'm just kind of got a little bit, had a little bit of an obsession about this. Shannon said to me, have you seen that there's Crayola's release, The Colors of Kindness?

And so I'm like, what are Colors of Kindness? And I went and it's just a pack of crayons with a slightly different wrapper on it. It's all the same colors. Okay. It's all the same colors. Right. Brilliant marketing from Crayola.

Yeah, good from them. So I've got, and I was going to do the top six colours of kindness they missed, but then I thought this will be better. The top six Crayola colours of cruel. Ooh. Wow. Yeah, nice. Yeah.

So we won't be dipping our toes into colours like always brave, which is cadet blue, or Hello Sunshine, Cray Yellow. That feels yellow. Do you know Cray Yellow is like the number one yellow? Yes. Have you seen the woman online? Who only collects the yellow, yeah. Why?

And she's right. It was a discontinued yellow. It's a beautiful yellow. Oh, was that a discontinued yellow? Yeah, it was like a richer yellow. Almost an orangey yellow. It is a beautiful yellow. It sounds like she should get out more? Yeah, it was like a richer yellow. Almost an orangy yellow. It is a beautiful yellow. It sounds like she should get out more.

Do you know what? It sounds like she should get laid. I'll say it. Sounds like it's been a while. I mean, you know, yellow crayons are great, but sex is better. Do you know what is better? Sex, yeah. Not the sex I've been having.

Mate, you neither. We'll get an update soon on the show. A story that we mentioned yesterday. Yeah, the mysterious 5K man, as everybody's calling him. The stranger that in December, not yesterday and not in Otago, in December in Auckland gave a man who was doing his gardens $5,000 cash and then scarped it off. No explanation.

What's the latest? The latest update. Yeah, that's coming up up But next on the show Vandals in Paris Are not happy Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley Now

Have you Lads I mean I will say It's not targeted towards you Have you lads My boys boys boys Watched Emily in Paris No

That does not Look like it appeals to me. Is that the radio version of that Jay-Z and Kanye song? No, no, no. It's a fashion. No. Okay, there you go. Starring Nepo Baby. Lily Collins.

Yes. Is it Lily Collins? Yes. Who's Phil Collins' daughter? Phil Collins. Yeah. She's way too good. Granddaughter. No, daughter. Daughter. Yeah. She's way too big a granddaughter.

No, daughter. We'll let him Google it and then we'll just wait to be like. We'll let him catch up to the pop culture. Yeah. Okay. So he's 70. Happy birthday for yesterday.

To Phil Collins. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do. So Happy birthday for yesterday To Phil Collins Emily in Paris, I watched it And I'll say, it's a steaming turd But I really enjoyed it That's when I heard the reviews It was so bad, people just loved it The script sucks And it's just sort of lame and poppy

But for some reason I really like it The fashion's amazing You get to see Paris It's just sort of lame and poppy. But for some reason, I really like it. The fashion's amazing. It's in Paris. You get to see Paris. Yeah. Like, it's just, it really, like, glorifies Paris and makes Paris look beautiful and not at all... Stinky.

Stinky and quite dirty as it is. Love Paris, but it can be rough. Anyway, Vandals have had enough of this show and their tourists and their fandom and their film crews and everything. And they've started writing like scrawling graffiti over the kind of main area where they film. Lots of things.

Emily F Off, that was one. So it's directed at the film crew, not the tourists that are coming as a result. It's a mixture. Oh, okay. But both. Do you remember before the pandemic, Europe had had an, especially like Barcelona,

they'd like spray painted. Barcelona. Barcelona. They'd like spray painted like tourist buses and they just had it with tourists. Yeah. Airbnbs and just like tourists everywhere. And then the pandemic happened.

And they were like, please come back. Come back. And now I think they're like, please leave now. They've had enough. Oh, so they're back to having enough. Oh, hot and cold. Yeah. So, yeah, Emily was written on a wall.

Right. Underneath that it was Paris, ce n'est pas à toi, which means South Paris is not yours. Oh, wow. On a fountain in the square, Emily not welcome. Emily is shit.

So they're literally spray painting on these beautiful things Yeah yeah In the middle of gay Paris Because they've just had enough Another huge like Very unfrench because of course when they surrendered to Hitler They did so so that The city of Paris wouldn't be

Bombed or marked or destroyed Because Hitler was pretty much like By the way if you haven't noticed, I'm back on my World War II shit. Yeah, right. Because you're watching Masters of the Year. I'm back into it. I'm actually looking for a book

because the Masters of the Year is based on a book. Is it? Yeah, I want another World War II book. But yeah, they basically said, we don't want you destroying the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower and their... Beautiful pronunciation. That was beautiful, Vaughn.

Well, just as I said it, I was like, that wasn't built for the triumph of World War II. No, it was built for a previous Napoleonic war. I don't know. Do you know what they've said? Because they want the tourists to stop coming and taking photos there. And they've actually described a thing called Paris Syndrome, which is the term given to a tourist who have been given unrealistic

and romanticised expectations of France for books and films. That should also be called the Hollywood Syndrome. Yeah. Oh, my God. When you walk down the Hollywood Walk of Fame, you're like, bleh. I'll never forget my first time in Hollywood. I was 16 and I still, like, really wanted to be a Hollywood actor. And then I got there and was like, why is this man weird as hell?

And then a five minute drive in Beverly Hills is some of the nicest place you'll ever see. Yeah, I know. I googled other places that were ruined by TV shows. Yeah. So of course you got the Breaking Bad house. Yeah. Apparently there is a memorial site in Pembrokeshire in Wales for Dobby the House Elf. Oh, gosh.

We were just watching Deathly Hallows yesterday. Were you? August just watches the Harry Potter movies from start to end and then starts again. I've seen a couple of them. And I saw the bit where Dobby dies. Spoiler alert, Dobby. Oh, my God.

We're sorry, listener. By the way, it was that bit, Helena Bonham Carter that did it. Oh, wow. The full house house. Yes, my mum and dad have been there in San Francisco. The Friends apartment building. The apartment building.

The famous stairs that the Joker, when Harqueen Phoenix is the Joker and he runs down the stairs in the Bronx. Harqueen. Yeah, I never say that right. Joaquin. Joaquin, that's right, yeah. What about Notting Hill? The door.

Bookshop and the door. Game of Thrones was some of the place Beyond the Wall Dubrovnik And in Iceland And of course the most famous one would be the beach, right? Yeah In Thailand, yeah

Oh yeah, that one I mean, we're all a little guilty of doing these things Because we love it What, are we going to not go? Are we going to not take a photo? I'm there We'll be respectful Yeah I love it. What, are we going to not go? Are we going to not take a photo? I'm there. We'll be respectful.

Yeah. Right, yesterday we talked about this. You're right, got a lot of saliva. Yesterday. Dark. Yeah. Yesterday we talked about on the show a man in Auckland just before Christmas was handed $5,000. $5,000. $5,000? By a man that he did not recognise before the man who dropped off the money skedaddled away.

Yeah. Now the 78-year-old who received the $5,000 took it to the police. Narc. Now it's out. Sorry. I think we all would have kept the money, right? We all would have just kept it. $5,000 would be so nice.

I kind of get where he's coming from. He doesn't know that a gang isn't going to turn up the next day. Not tying you to something, totally. Yeah, and say, give me the money back, and by then you've deposited it. Gangs are pretty good about money. Gangs are pretty good about money. Are they reasonable?

I think they're reasonable people when it comes to their ill-gotten gains. I think so too. Yeah, and he doesn't seem to think he deserves this. He can't put his finger on any one person that owes him. Yeah. Well, the mistake this guy made was he did it in an affluent neighbourhood because people have security cameras and we now have a full length CCTV image

of this athletic and I will say athletic, he's wearing a running singlet. Oh, okay. He's wearing a running singlet Is he hot? Athletic. Good bod. Oh, okay. If he doesn't have a good bod, then I've got to get one of these cameras because it really is making him look like he's got a good bod. Is it like when you take a photo

with plus five? It's kind of elongating you, making you look a bit skins. Yeah, I don't know. He's got a hat on backwards. He's a navy blue. Shorts, running shoes. It does look like he's out for a trot. Okay.

Well, he did. The man said he ran away after he gave him the $5,000. I just want to look at him again. He's got a Karl Urban profile, and that probably is only exaggerated by the fact that he's got a beard. Not a full beard. One of those beards is kind of a bit more of a strap situation. I'd call it a Craig David.

It's Craig David but it doesn't look as tidy. A lot of people that don't... It's a more masculine Craig David. Yeah, people that don't have jaws have those. Yeah. Now this guy looks like he's got a jaw. Okay. He's definitely on sort of a fitness buzz. We would say he'd be in his 30s, eh?

Yeah. Late 30s, maybe? He's got a t-shirt tan. Okay. If this was your friend. 100%. If that was someone I knew, I'd know it was them. Okay, wow.

No doubt. Okay, this is a great step in the investigation. So now, yeah, so many people are going to know this now. But isn't it odd, though, because it's not like he's broken the law, this man, right? We're just, everyone's curious about motivation. And now his photo is like front page of news websites. I know. And it looks like a criminal photo, like, have you seen this man?

Yes, I know. And he's like, I was just doing a nice act of charity to a lovely neighbour. Well, he said he was just delivering the cash to this man. So who gave him the cash to deliver? I need to know. Same. We're going to get answers this week, right? Surely.

I reckon we'll get answers today. This photo's been out overnight. This is the mystery we all needed. The delivery man was described as in his 20s and looking gym fit. No, I said late 30s. Oh, okay. Yeah. Could be. Do you know what I mean? Men wear age differently. Every man was described as in his 20s and looking gym fit. No, I said late 30s. Oh, okay, yeah. Could be.

Do you know what I mean? Men, we age differently. Yeah, yeah, we do. We do. Well, we'll keep you updated. Head to Reddit. Head to Reddit. Reddit.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Silly little boys. Silly little boys. It is so silly, silly, silly. All right, you can only pick one. Is it liquid soap or bar soap? It's liquid soap. This was so one-sided. Yeah. Though as I

said, I did have an experience with a bar soap the other day and it's just quite nice to sort of rub all over yourself. I like like a posh one. An oatmeal one with a bit of like grit and stuff in it. That's a real good soap. Sometimes you stay at a hotel or like a flash one for work

and they have like a little oatmeal-y posh one. And you're like okay this is actually quite nice. Exfoliates a bit. You just use it once

and you put it on the shelf and you check out. You don't have to deal with the mankiness the next day. But then there's a few companies around the world

that take those soaps and like boil them back down and create soaps for people in third world countries who don't have soaps. Yeah, but do they sieve out the pubes? Yeah, the pubes get sieved out. I know people, they're in third world countries.

There's a pube plucker. And their job is they stand on a belt and the liquid soap, and its liquid falls hot and it runs past and they've got tweezers and they go pluck, pluck, pluck, pluck out the pubes. And the dead skin cells? Well, they just get cucked off. Cucked?

Yuck. Cucked off. Y cells Well they just get Cooked off Yuck Cooked off Yuck I mean why don't we Just send people In third world countries Actual bars of soap Well

Hotels don't want to Just give it A word like that They want to get A bit of a use out of it I like that hotels now Are doing the refillable bottles Unless Hayley steals them

They're chained on the wall They're chained Yeah I know But if you bring your own BYO bottle And you just undo the lid And you just stand there Pumping it for a while Also I did love that QT, you just, yeah, I know, but if you bring your own BYO bottle and you just undo the lid and you just stand there pumping it for a while.

That's great. I did love that QT called you out on that. Yeah, I know. Can you stand there in the shower at a hotel pumping it for a while? Yeah, I pump it for ages. In the shower. Until it's empty.

Yeah, okay. Interesting. 84% of people said liquid soap. 16% said bar soap. I actually just thought of another bar soap I had. Listener of the show and expat, Kiwi living in Australia,

working in the mines, Thomas. Okay. Sends me a mine care package every now and then. What am I? A mine care package? Wow. These mine care packages absolutely rule. Right.

And last time he sent me the two types of soap that they get issued. One was a bar soap, and it's just basically like a bar of sand. And coming in at the end of the day after yard work or getting all mopped up, it basically just sandpapers all the stuff off your hands. I love that.

I love that. It rules. For painting? Yes. It just takes it straight off. I used to get an exfoliating mitt for painting, but you do stuff it with your hands. There's other stuff that's like in a tube, like a massive toothpaste tube, and you squeeze it on, and that stuff's, I don't even know how that works. It's like a radiating mitt for painting, but you do stuff it with your hands. And you see this other stuff that's like in a tube,

like a massive toothpaste tube, and you squeeze it on, and that stuff's, I don't even know how that works. It's magic. God, he must have fabulous skin. Oh, clean. With all that exfoliation.

Or no coal dust. Yeah. No coal dust hanging around. 84% of people said liquid soap. 16% said bar soap. Emily, bar soap, if you live alone, it's superior. No, it's not. Liquid, if you live with flatties,

trust no one and their pubes. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you're living by yourself, if you had a nice oatmeal bar soap, you could probably put that in a little soap holder. It still gets manky and yuck. Nah.

Yuck. It's a no from me. It bugs me, Connor says, it bugs me how bar soap stops lathering well when the bar's nearly finished. Is it? Interesting. I think you're using a dud soap. What's he using?

What was that one back in the day that had the ad with Cleopatra having a bath in it? Imperial leather. Why was that so readily available for him? I know because we had that growing up. That was our mollive. Did you have Imperial Leather because your parents believed it was a top tier soap? Maybe.

And also like liquid soap wasn't that big of a thing. No, it wasn't. Growing up. It was all about the bar. Yeah, dude. And I've just Googled Imperial Leather and it came in a, look at this, flashback. Yes. It came in a cardboard sleeve., look at this, flashback! Yes! It came in a cardboard sleeve.

Yes. Oh, it must have been a pop. It was a Cussins. I think we had a five pack. Yeah, Cussins. Yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, get five pack. And when did liquid soap become a thing?

Because like, you know, there were always the Lynx body washes and that, but then, yeah, it wasn't until the 2000s that we had the big pump

bottles, right? Yeah. Mid to late. Mid to late? everybody started, now, it wasn't until the 2000s that we had the big pump bottles, right? Yeah. Mid to late. Mid to late? And then everybody started using it. Now you just wouldn't bother with a bar of soap. Well, 86% of people.

Despite its popularity throughout the early to mid-1900s, it wasn't until 1980 that liquid soap became mass produced for domestic use. But I reckon it took a while. To get to New Zealand. Because we definitely had those. Yeah, we had bar soap. And then we would have moved to your Dove bars, your Palmolive bars,

and then we would have moved to your rough soaps. Yeah. Does mum have a bar of Sard in the laundry at home? It's number one. It is a great, there's simply no better fabric soap. People, you always spray their white clothing and then put it in the thing.

You've got to get the bar, you've got to work it. Yeah, right. Circular. Yeah. Of course. Of course. I need to get a fresh one actually uh brianna says uh body equals bar soap hands equal liquid soap so she's got her hand no she's rocking a bar on the board she's going a bar on the board uh madeline says gross bar soap water that's all she said she's screaming yeah it's a little pinky, doesn't it?

It does get pinky. Ah, but there's no pink on the soap, so I'm not sure. I know. What is it? And it says, I get eczema on my hands and bar soap is the only thing that works. I also have liquid soap for guests to use. Bar soap can often have- It shows eczema girl what's your soap of choice.

Has she tried sorbolene? Sorbolene? I just use like- The big thing is sorbolene. This free, this free, this free, this free soap. That's definitely not cleaning anything. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay. Save the planet, guys. How lazy are you? You can't rub a bar of soap in your hands and save all that plastic. Crazy bad for the environment. Says someone probably driving a car. Not so fire. I don't think that's correct.

Okay, so what are you walking to work every day? What are you? Well, yeah, I don't have a car and I have liquid soap, so I'm winning. Actually, yeah, you're in debt. Thank you. I'm actually, yeah. Yeah, you can do that because you do other things. And you bought one nice thing of soap and now you're just refilling it with trash.

Yes, thank you. The bright orange trash that comes in a recyclable bottle. Yes. Those ones that you can roll up. Yeah, I do that. So actually environmentally he's pretty sound. We've got nice soap pumps. Sandy said, other people touch bar soap,

which to me is just a little bit gross. And Simone says, I cannot stand the mushy mess of bar soap sitting in a pool of its own despair. She's got away with words. It's a hard one. It's a hard one. It's a hard one. It's own despair.

Georgina is still haunted By pubes on soap She grew up with two brothers Who were older than her And as a teenage girl Had to You know they're rubbing it Straight on the genies Like straight on the bush

Smashing Smashing the bush Smashing it into the bush With the cussins Yeah Smashing the imperial leather Straight into the bush Those big hairy boys

That you call brothers Play ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley Play ZM Those big hairy boys that you call brothers. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. I feel like yesterday Aaron, my fiance, tried some independent shopping. And I was like, good for you. Hates it.

Can only shop at one store. The big long store. Johnny Biggs. Johnny Big Long Store. Yeah. Bless him. And you know what? They do good stuff. Yeah.

How tall is he? He's six foot six, but he's also extremely limmy. Like it's all in the leg and the arm. He's limmy. Yeah, which is where the length has to go. Otherwise he's got cropped pants and short sleeves. That's a look.

It is a look. What about online? Are there long stores online? America, man. Like, America's where it's at. But then if it doesn't fit, you've got to send it back. You've got to get it tailored then, right? Yeah, exactly.

So if it's too big, that's good. But if you get it and it's too short, they can let a hem out. But how much can they let out? Yeah, exactly. So if it's too big that's good, but if you get it and it's too short they can let a hem out, but how much can they let out? Yeah, totally. I know. So we've got a weekend this wedding. We've got a wedding this weekend and we had one last weekend. Yeah. And I

he put together an absolutely nice outfit for the weekend. He looked great. He looked fantastic. Can I run something quickly by you? Before Sade listens? Yep. She would not let me get a cream jacket to go with my cream pants and white shirt. No, I'm team cream. I'm team cream.

Now. But you might look like a safari. So I looked a little bit like Kingpin. He's a super villain from the Marvel Universe. Vincent D'Onofrio plays him in Daredevil and stuff. I don't want to. Bald head, broad shoulders, cream suit. Yeah.

Bit of a Kingpin look. Okay. So I've also got a creamer. Like Lou Baga. A creamer. A creamer. A creamer. A creamer.

A creamer. A creamer. I know. So I'm going to go. But do you think I go cream jacket, cream pants, creamer, creamer, green shirt? I would go white. You can go white as well. Or do you think it's a bit bridal?

Also, you're just asking for sauce on you. Because the people that are wearing this weekend, they're both virgins, aren't they? Yes. Yes. Yeah. Gay virgins. Gay virgins. Gay virgins, aren't they? Yes. Yes, yeah, gay virgins. Gay virgins. Gay virgins, yeah.

So they abide by some rules of the Bible, but definitely not others. Yeah. Gotcha, gotcha. Yeah. I'm team cream for you. Okay. She was out of her mind when she was saying it wouldn't work. You're going to get splashed with sauces and-

No, but he didn't get his cream pants. I don't get splashed with a single sauce. You did split them, though. No, they were tested. Right, okay. But why doesn't Aaron, who went shopping yesterday, why doesn't he just wear the same thing as last weekend? I was like, no one, one, no one cared.

Did you feel that? We all were so stressed about the dress code of this wedding. We turned up, no one cares. We all look nice. It's good enough. But I don't know. He just got into his head that he didn't want to wear the same outfit. So he took himself

to the shops yesterday and I said, do you want me to come? You know, I can pick out some things online and we can go there with a mission. And he said, no, no, no, no, I'll be alright. And then I sat on the couch and proceeded to get like, sorry. Your mom is a MOTH in studio, just buzzed. I just did a flyby.

Hang on, let me get that out of my system. I just absolutely smashed it He said he didn't need my help and then proceeded to send like infinite messages of him like what about this what about this hang on I'll try it with the other jacket why didn't he just take you

I like the blue okay what about this with the blue is this too casual I could have just been there I could have just like slapped an outfit on and been like, this is what it is. Yeah. And then, but he just insisted that he could do it on his own,

but didn't. And I love, I love his intention of doing it. I think we ask because, like we don't care, but we don't want you. To be like, what are you wearing?

What have you done? Yeah. Anyway, he look, he has come up with a quite a nice outfit. He's wearing blues, blues and browns. We've got blue jacket, blue shirt. Oh, yeah, that's lovely.

That's lovely. It looks great. Blues and browns is a great combo. Blues and browns. So now, and then I looked at my wardrobe, I was like, well, I don't have anything that goes with blues and browns. You're the writer, now you need a whole new dress, do you? I'm black to white and he's gone blues and browns.

I'm going to have to, so I am currently on Karen Walker and have found a lovely bluey dress. See, he's. These are the people that told me they were on a budget and then turn up at the Airbnb last weekend with vintage pornography that they didn't pay nothing for. They're like, we won't go. Let's take breakfast and save money. They turn up with expensive vintage pornography

and now they've both gone shopping again. I was going to walk away from that again. Is he going to walk away from that? Is he actually going to walk away from that? There are some things that take precedence and vintage pornography was that.

Right. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. From the self-driving ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hello there. Targeted advertising towards Shanley Pajamas at the social media desk was Crayola's Colour of Kindness crayons.

24 crayons in a box. Crayons? Crayons. Crayons. Like a pianist. You're an artist with crayons. With crayons. Cols. Crowns. Like a pianist. With my crowns. You're an artist with crowns. With my crowns.

Colours of kindness. They've got special kindness labels on them. Hello Sunshine on Cray Yellow. Peace of Mind is a cool mint. Sky's the Limit is powder blue. A Warm Hug, oatmeal sort of colour. Goodness me. They've all just got like, be kind.

Sounds very positive, doesn't it? Throw kindness around like confetti. And all the C They've all just got like, be kind. Sounds very positive, doesn't it? Throw kindness around like confetti. And all the Crayola colours have got kind names now, like warm and fuzzy is the peach. Because peaches are fuzzy.

Delicious. I feel like kids today just won't have that hard time we had where it came to which colour do you colour yourself in on your coloured picture.

Yeah, I know. They've got so many skin tones to choose from now. It was either black, white or peach. Yeah. Now, all sorts. I was always a pink little piggy when I threw myself in as a kid. Yeah, they've got all these

colours. Not a hell of a lot of skin tones in a box of 24 though. No. Unless you're a Muppet. And then I think you'll find something that's the same colour as your fur. I'm a Muppet so that's good. Perfect. Well I thought if they're doing

the Colours of Kindness we could do the top six Crayola Colours of Cruel. Okay. Number six on the list Callus Canary Yellow. It's a bright

Callus. Yeah that's a very callous act. Yes. A bright yellow a vibrant yet violent bright yellow. Number five on the list of the top six trailer.

Colours of Cruel. Sadistic Scarlet. Oh, yeah. Sadistic. Yeah. That's a good colour. Sadistic Scarlet. Yeah, you've got a picture in your mind.

Yeah. Sort of at the bloody end of the Scarlet scale. Really dark. Yeah. By the way, with all the like smut reading, are these words turning anybody on? Nothing fluttering yet. Nothing fluttering yet. Nothing fluttering yet.

Number four on the list of the top six Creole are Colours of Cruel, Evil Emerald. Yeah, that's good. Emerald already kind of has evil, and I blame entirely old Disney movies. That green of like... The witchy green. The Wizard of Oz had the emerald city yes which kind of was

a bit weird lurking behind the curtains it's a lovely colour it's really been sullied hasn't it it has been sullied by Disney

it always makes me think of the witches what was her name and she was the big witch Angelica Angelica Houston no no no

not the witches not the movie the witches of Disney old Disney movies. And Angelina Jolie played Maleficent. Even though I know she was more purple. She was definitely purple. Number three on the list of the top six Crayola colors of cruel, tyrannical teal.

Oh, that's good. God, I hate teal. You're not a fan. Not a fan of teal at all. Right. Retro-y New Zealand uniforms wouldn't have done it for you then. Nah. There's something about it. It's justal at all. Right. Retro-y New Zealand uniforms wouldn't have done it for you then. There's something about it.

It's just off for me. Okay. Number two on the list of the top six, Crowell, Colours of Cruel, Narcissistic Navy Blue. That's a bit of me. That's my favourite colour. That's really me. Yeah, Narcissistic Navy.

Wow. That's actually the new name for the colour of your hats. Wow. Narcissistic Navy. Love that. It's what half his wardrobe for the colour of your hats. Wow. Narcissistic navy. Love that. It's what half his wardrobe is. Yeah. Excuse me. And half of his personality.

It's just easier to match everything with darker colours, okay? It totally is. And number one on the list of the top six Corrala colours of cruel, hateful hot pink. Aww. But it's in at the moment, isn't it? Hot pink with Barbie. Yeah, Barbie.

But then if you think about the plastics in Mean Girls. Yeah. They were a bit of a Hot Pink crew. They were a little bit mean, weren't they? That's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. If you think you've been on a bad date, listen to this. So there is a fella who shared this on Bad Dates of Melbourne

Facebook page and I thought this was going to be a female story no a fella okay a fella

I did too when you told us okay no no no so Bad Dates of Melbourne he shared he'd been talking with a girl online for a few weeks

and then one night she invited him over for a couple of drinks gave him her address and was like one night she invited him over for a couple of drinks, gave him her address and was like, come over around this time. We have a couple of drinks at my house. He set out on his bicycle. This is the most Melbourne story ever already. I'm imagining no helmets.

Yeah, no helmets. Floppy hair, all about the fashion. When he got to the house, all the lights were off. And it seemed like no one was home. Okay. So he called her and was like, hey, I'm here for some drinks. And she was like, oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed. I've gone to bed.

But I'll get up. I'm keen to go out. Okay. Who can do that? Wait, was he late? Who's getting out of bed once they're in bed? I reckon I've done it like twice in my life. How old are these people?

I'm imagining no older than 24. Once you're in bed. I reckon I've done it like twice in my life. How old are these people? I'm imagining no older than 24. Once you're in bed. Doesn't say, doesn't say. That's crazy. So he was like, okay, all good, but impromptu. Was he late for the date? He just, well, she'd just forgotten. No, she'd just like forgotten.

Okay. How long before between here's my address and him turning up, do you think it was? Probably a couple of days. Come over on Saturday. Why don't you text him and be like, I'm really looking forward to tonight, and him turning up. Do you think it was? Probably a couple of days. Come over on Saturday. Why don't you text him and be like, I'm really looking forward to tonight. Yeah, I'm about to set up on my giant bicycle ride to see you.

You're still going to be there? I would have sent a picture of my bike and said, mate Christy Steed awaits me. Don't take me to your castle, milady. I would have got laid hates, by the way. I can imagine. Believe it. I'm holding myself back now. I know. So he waited for her

and then she came out and he ended up driving them in her car to the pub. And they met up with some friends and they had a drink together. She was like, do you mind driving? And he was like, sure, I can do that. Drive to the pub. And next thing

they know, they go to a club after the pub. And he's chatting away and he turns around and sees her and she's got her tongue down some guy's throat. And they're just absolutely going out. And he's like, oh, okay. Did he misread

the situation? What's the vibe? What vibe are we picking up here? He heads outside of the club and is just sitting there being like, well, what do I do?

And he's like, I'm a good person. I'm not just going to leave her here with the car and, you know, like the situation. Oh, I would have just given her the keys. I'd be out my dude.

100%. He ends up spending the night just talking to the security and the bouncers until the club closes. And she comes out and he's like, hey. She's like, can you drive us home? She's got the guy.

She's got the guy that he was making out with. And asks the guy that she, like, invited to drive them back to her place. Wait, to join in or just to go home when he gets there? He's sitting on that chair that every hotel room has and watching. Yeah.

No, he just, uh. He took them home and then left. What the heck? Oh, he sounds too nice.

Yeah. So he like drove them home, parked up the car, gave the keys, got back on his bicycle. Of course. And then was like. And on Godly Hour in the morning if the car had shut.

Yeah. What's that, Melbourne, like two, three? Yeah. Oh, my God. I would have been out of there. Yeah, same. I would have given her the keys. She's got Uber.

Yeah. So the next day she texted him to apologise and was like, oh, sorry, like I got a bit carried away and that was really rude of me and like would you like to come back over? And he texts back being like, no. And next time order an effing cab. Yeah, yeah. Like what the hell.

I'm glad he didn't go back over. Do you know what's terrible? Okay. Okay, so you've done this? Yeah. I must have. I don't know what I was thinking at the time, but I was about 20 years old and I was at drama school

and I was sort of lightly seeing this guy. And we were like hooking up and it was casual. He wasn't my boyfriend yet, but we were like regularly seeing each other. And one night he invited me to come out and I met him in town and we went to a couple of bars and we went to this bar called Mighty Mighty. And while we were there, I bumped into this guy, this other guy, Isaac,

who I used to just like hook up with. And I don't know what came over me, but when I saw this other guy, I just kissed him intensely. And the guy that I'd been there with was like, what? What a weird thing to do. And then, yeah, I was very apologetic about it. Who did you go home with that night? The guy who I...

Right, okay. But he was very much like, what was that about? Anyway, look, I was a bit wild in front of this 20. Okay, yeah. It's like ordering, though. You've ordered, you know, the chicken, and then somebody else gets a steak, and you're like, can I have a little pot of that?

You look across to the table, you're like, I want a bit of the steak. Yeah, I just wanted to like... Can I just have a little bit of the steak? I'll give you a little bit of the chicken. You could have gone to Isaac's, whoever Isaac was there with, and were like, you can pash this guy if you want. Totally.

Because I just wanted to try yours, and now you can try mine. And now I'm back being like, nah, anyway. I want to know if you were ever ditched in the middle of a date like this. For someone else, or just they just left you and ghosted? Either. Or either, but I'd love it to be like for someone else, as is my example. It's got to be somebody else.

Like if you were just there and you met up at a social gathering and then they went home with someone else. That's not going to feel good, is it? It will have happened. You think about clubs, but also even like house parties. Big 21sts. Yeah. You've gone with someone.

Maybe you misread how exclusive you- Oh, no. You took your day and then you- Happened to me. I'm sorry, hands up. What? Did it? Yeah, happened to me, yeah.

Oh, no. A girl left school and went to another school, so she couldn't come to our ball. Right. And I quite liked her. Yeah. And so I took her to the ball thinking, she can't go without me. Yeah.

I'm the ticket. Yeah. And then afterwards, yeah, she hooked up with some dude from like some other school that was there with somebody else. And I was just like, oh, I didn't think that was how that was supposed to work. You're my date.

Yeah. Yeah. I've actually got you a ticket. So you thought you owned her, did you? Yes. Yes. It was 1998, I believe. Last millennia, it was a different story.

It was a different time. Okay. Oh, my God. No, I didn't believe she was under any obligation, but she also said, oh, you know, I'm not, like, looking for that and blah, blah, blah. And then she was looking for that,

just not with this guy. Not with this guy. Boss. Are they? All right, well, and maybe you want to admit it like Hayley has. 0800- Maybe you did it. 0800-DARLS.M is the number.

You can text through 9696. Have you been ditched on a date for someone else, or, like me, did you do the ditching? Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. We want to know if you were ever ditched in the middle of a date for someone else

or if you did the ditching like I did once not proud but not ashamed because a guy in Australia went on a date with a woman it was such a mess and then looked over

and she was hooking up with some other guy and he ended up driving them back to her place to get it on He's too nice he was too nice about it You didn't ditch.

You juggled. Because you went with one guy, threw him up in the air, pashed another guy, and then caught that other guy before he hit the ground. I know. Yeah. Crazy. That's incredible. You should have known me back then, guys.

Honestly. No, thanks. Anonymous, you did this. You did the ditching. That's right. I was having a house party at my flat and had invited the guy that i was kind of casually seeing um and then another one of my friends that i'd also been casually seeing turned up so i uninvited the other guy you uninvited them while he was already

there um he was on his way he was like around the corner corner in an Uber and I told him I was tired and had gone to bed. You are a little miss. Oh my God. So when that happens, you have to get out of the Uber at your destination and then order another Uber? No, I think you can change. It's not like a taxi.

You're not like, hey, can you take me home? It's not my proudest moment. It's not my proudest moment. Look, you're going to live a life. What is your proudest moment? I love that so much. She's like, I don't have one yet. Yeah, I'm working towards it.

Did the guy get a second chance? Or was that it? I think that was sort of towards the end. Yeah, right. Okay, to kind of run its course. Anonymous. Thank you, Camille. When were you ditched midway through?

Hello, yes. Like Vaughan at my sixth form ball. Why is it always the sixth form ball, you know? Seventh form, you're growing up a bit. Maybe you've got over it a little bit. A bit immature. Yeah. Okay, so you went with your date.

Yeah. So I liked him for about a year. Finally built up the courage to invite him out to the ball. And then it was quite awkward at the ball. And then at the after party, I looked over and he was hooking up with my friend. Oh, your friend. Some friend?

Yeah, and then they dated for like the next three years. Oh, okay. Why did they break up? I don't know. What were you thinking? That he hooked up with someone else? Yeah, I just wanted it to be nice. I wanted it to be nice for Camille? I don't know. What were you thinking? That he hooked up with someone else? Yeah, I just wanted it to be nice. I wanted it to be nice for Camille.

I wanted some poetry. Was it nice when they finally broke up, though? I had moved on by that time, so I was more mature. Yeah, you can tell because you went up at the end of the word. No, it was nice. Where are we at romantically now? Not me and you. I've been married for 12 years.

Me too. Me too. A little bit more, but look at us. Look at us go. I know. I know. Look how mature we are. Yeah, we are so mature.

So what you're saying is that maybe a little bit of heartbreak at the sixth form ball. It's good for you. It's a bit of character building maybe. That's the key. Yeah. It's good for you. It's a bit of character building, maybe. It's a key, yeah. It's pleasant to me. Definitely. Camille, thank you. Some messages in.

At the school ball, I went with my neighbour, and the boy I liked went with my ex-best friend. I ended up dancing with the boy I liked all night instead of my date, which was my neighbour, and I ended up going home with him and my ex-best friend. It was really annoying. Yeah. My sister went to the...

Another year 12 formal Year 12 we get loose My sister went to the year 12 formal With Mr Nice Guy Came home with Mr Bad Guy Mr Nice Guy waited patiently Until she got the bad guy out of her system Then she got back with Mr Nice Guy

And they've been married for 20 years with two kids Okay well that's a two kids story Do you want to hear about mum's rebellious phase Yeah Where she left your dad by the side of the road And came back and picked him up later on kids. Okay, well that's nice. That's a two kids and story. Do you want to hear about mum's rebellious phase? Yeah. Where she left your dad by the side of the road and came back and picked him up later on. I was ditched at the high school. We could have just talked about high school balls.

I know. Deep well of drama. I was ditched at my high school ball by the guy I was dating. We'd been together for a year and it was my year 13 ball. I bought the tickets and when we got there he disappeared. When I found him on the dance floor

with three other girls grinding up on them. Grinding? I'm sad to say we stayed together for another year after that. Oh dear. Oh no,

grinding with one woman. Unforgivable. Grinding with three? Three. You're not coming back from that. When I was 17 I went to a block course

for a farming cadetship. Farming cadetship? I don't farming cadetship. Farming cadetship? I don't know what that means. Farming cadet. A farming cadetship. Or do you mean that's autocorrect? We grew up different. Army cadetship would make more sense, right?

Oh, yeah, maybe. Is it an autocorrect? I don't know. And you know what? We'll never know. Met a guy. He was so lovely. We arranged to go out on a Friday night.

I met him at the club. Long story short, I went home with his best friend instead. Two completely different guys. Super nice versus the bad boy. It's always the bad boy. The bad boy's pretty hot. I love bad boys. They win leather. My bad though, got up the next morning and went inside for breakfast and it turns out the nice guy's father was

the tutor. And he kicked me off the course of being insubordinate. Now that insubordinate doesn't line up with farming again, does it? It feels more like it might have been army. I want to imagine her in a farming cadetship. It's different. Doing like the farming obstacle course.

Milk the cow. Run over and shear the sheep. Move some hay. Yeah. Yeah. I met a girl on a night out, got back to my apartment building and bumped into another girl who I knew. Turned out, who I knew and turned out to be really keen on me.

The original girl just totally picked up on the vibe and decided to leave and I spent the night with the second girl. It was like a handoff, like a baton in a relay race. You're right. Pass the baton. I like that she was the same. Yep, I'm not. I'm not going to compete with that.

I can see what's happening here. Yeah. I'll just remove myself from the situation. A farming cadetship is a thing, you townies. I grew up on a farm and I've never heard this term at all. But like, what are you like in the farming cadetship's NZ? It's like an apprenticeship. A farming apprenticeship.

Oh, right. But do you have to be like, yes, sir. Two-year agricultural training program. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. And in the morning you have to hoist the flag, the Fonterra flag. Yeah.

Tie that off. Salute it. We apologise. Yeah. Us townies. 21 gun salute at the possums in the tree. Some Guinness World Records you don't even know are world records. I saw one online that was a guy who could set up

and tip over as many books in one minute. And I was like, that is a dumb world record. Get a life, you know. I'll say it again, get laid. Get a better hobby. But there is a guy who has just won a Guinness World Record related to Taylor Swift. Yeah, he's a 20-year-old.

He wore an eye mask in the submission video so that he couldn't be accused of like peaking or any kind of, you know, auto cues or anything. He identified in one minute 34 Taylor Swift songs by lyrics. So his

friends would just read out a lyric. Like blah, blah, blah. I know it. I know it. I know it. I know it. I know it. And as soon as he got it, they moved on to the next line. Now, two verified witnesses looked at a screen of randomly chosen lyrics. One of them read the beginning of songs while a timer counted down. And he did 34 in one minute. And that is a Guinness record.

Okay. I mean, that's insane. So for this test, we're going to take our two resident Swifties, Shannon and Carwin. And I've got a list before me of lyrics and the names of the songs they come from. And I mean, look, you can go for the 34, but I think it's better to be a competition against each other. What, just like a nice round 10 or something? Well, I just think, well, do you have a minute timer? I do, yes.

If you watch the time fletch, Vaughn, you listen for who got it right and take a score. The tally is in one minute, who can get more? Yes. So we're doing it at the same time? At the same time? Carwin or Shannon. Whoever's first, just say it. If there's some disagreement, will the timer be paused?

No. It's just going to be up to me. Yeah, up to you. You've got the power here. And you're very... Don't let that go to your head. You know what? It's nice to see a white man with some power around here finally.

Finally. Jeez. And I'm straight, by the way, so pick that up. Wow. Are you doing quite well for yourself? Nothing too much to complain about. Jesus. Now, who out of both of you,

Carlwyn, you're the bigger fan, right? For sure. Okay. Wow, Shannon, do you hate Taylor Swift or something? No, I'm just lowering your expectations on me. She's just nagging herself. For those that don't know, Carwen is venturing on obsessive.

Look, I have a tattoo and I have a Taylor Swift cup in front of me. And how many times are you seeing her in Australia? Twice. Twice. Well, some people have completely missed out, but don't worry, Taylor Thursday starts tomorrow on ZM. On ZM.

On ZM radio. Yes. It's Tuesday tomorrow. Yeah, it is. That'll be why. That'll be why. It's Taylor Thursday born. Okay.

I reckon we should go rogue one day and do it on Tuesday. Nah, I won't do it. Taylor Tuesday does sound better than Taylor Thursday. Taylor, you're in charge of lyrics? Yeah. Okay. Are we ready? I'm nervous. Okay, I like Thursday. Taylor, you're in charge of lyrics? Yeah. Okay. Are we ready? I'm nervous.

Okay, I'm going to... Now, wait, do they buzz in or do they just say the lyrics? You just got to say the name of the song. They're both blonde. Oh, the one on the right and the orange. And the orange. Yeah. Wait, are you buzzing in or just say the lyrics?

Just say it. Say it. Because buzzing in is going to take up the time. Do we just need to say the song, not the album, right? The song, not the album. Gotcha. Okay. All right.

Your time starts now. I used to switch out these cans. I just ghost. It's different. Correct. Don't treat me like some situation that needs to be handled. No. Yeah.

Yeah. Tolerator? No. No. Closure. Correct. You understand now why they had lost their minds and fought the wars. You're in love.

Correct. You play stupid games. You win stupid prizes. You were Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince. Correct. You drew stars around my scars, but now I'm bleeding. Cardigan? Correct.

You kiss me in a way that's going to screw me up forever. Oh, you kiss me. Superb in Legends. Correct. You did a number on me, but honestly, baby, who's counting? It's from Reputation. Yeah. And the song is Pass.

But she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts. Oh, you belong with me. Correct. No one wanted to play with me as a little kid, so I've been scheming. You're on your own, kid. No. You've been scheming. Mastermind.

Correct. Don't call me kid, don't call me baby. Look at this, God. I'm so confused. Exhale. No. Time is up.

Time is up. Man, that is... My heart is racing. You know the hardest part about it? A different song was playing as the music background. Yeah, that kind of hurt. For me, I was just like, I can't even concentrate on anything

apart from that. How the hell did that guy get 34? That is insane. Do you reckon he sang them like I did? Because that did hell. Totally. It helped you. I don't believe that helped anybody else. Also wasted about 10 seconds per song. I will say, on

my ears, because I had my eyes on the lyrics, it sounded quite even. Yeah, I think so. To the adjudicator. Carwen got five. Yep. Shannon got three. Oh, my gosh.

So close. Our resident Swifty. Congratulations, Carwen. Thank you, thank you. I had over 34 ready to go. We really didn't need them, did we? And I've got Guinness on the phone. Hey, mate, you could go.

Yeah. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. It was a bust. Send us some, though. Yeah, we'll take some Guinnesses. We'll take some Guinness. Anyone for a Guinness?

Absolutely. Well done, girls. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Emojis. We love them. Emojis. There's new emojis. I want to look at what's mine.

Heaps, but hold your horses. Hold your horses. There's not a horsejis. There's new emojis. Not heaps, but hold your horses. Hold your horses. There's not a horse emoji. There are. There's horse emojis. Oh, yeah, but not in the update. There's already horses. Yeah, there's already horses.

Now, it says 138, I think I saw before, new emojis. Now, all of them apart from 1, 2, 3, four, five, six, are symbols or people walking. Oh, lame. What? Oh, lame. Oh, my God. They all go with the walking. There's four family symbols.

Two parents and a kid. One parent, two kids. One parent, one kid. Two parents, two kids. Ha, suck it if you've got three kids. You don't get one. Yeah. That's your fault for having too many kids,

says the guy with two kids. Yeah. So there's those ones, and then there's just the people walking, but they've given each, so there's a walk, a kneel, someone with a, like a seeing cane. Yep. A wheelchair, a motorised wheelchair. Okay.

And someone running. But they've given them all the racial grades of colour. Right. Can they change the grades of colour? Because sometimes I feel some people, no one in this room, but some people overbrown themselves. Oh, yeah. Okay, I know I've got a few friends that overbrown themselves.

Overbrown their thumbs up? Yeah, and I'm like, just stick to yellow, babes. We're all the same. It's safe. Question, do you change your thumbs up from winter to summer? I can only ever F with the lightest two. The lightest two. And the second to lightest is in the absolute midst of a summer tan. I feel I'm halfway between browns.

You're a three to four. Because I literally give myself a tanned thumbs up in summer, not a brown. Do you feel that that's a good, that little love heart one with the hands, do you think that's a good skin colour for me? Yes, that's you because it's got tan but it's still parkier. Okay, good, yeah, fuel because I don't want to be over browning.

What am I doing? I'm on yellow. I'm good, I'm yellow. I've just sent you my thumb, which I believe is my colour. Can you send me back yours? Okay. Stand by. He's using iMessage.

That's so old school. I know. That's quite white. I think that's good for Vaughan. That's me. Because you're very painstaking. That's the second. That's the second to lightest.

Okay. Can I just choose mine that I think is correct for me? Okay. I'm just going to add it to the work chat. I've just sent you mine, Vaughan. I don't know why I didn't do this in the work chat. I've just sent you mine. It's like yours, but a hint of tan.

Is that the second? Because I thought you might have gone third, and I was going to call you out on it. Yeah, I've gone second. No, I know that's too brown. That's too brown. Yeah. Yeah, but that's where I am.

I mean, I think, you know, you've got to tell your friends. If they're over-browning, calm down. Oh, no, you've gone very pale there, Hayley. I would go you one browner. Yeah, same. You just respect your 1% Hawaiian and 19% No, but look at it now. It's too brown. Too brown. Oh, my God. You are in the middle. I'm in the middle.

You're in the middle. So, in this new update with emojis, which I believe is coming out in iOS 18. Incorrect. 17.4. 17.4. 17.4. Okay. Idiot. So there's a whole lot of walking, kneeling,

all that getting about and there's some family symbols. Here are the six new ones that you'll actually probably use. A head shaking vertically. So a nod. It's got a couple of lines

so you know. To indicate it's going up and down. A head shaking horizontally which indicates no. And it's got its eyes shut so it's a real passive no. Like, hey, Vaughn, are you coming tonight? It's a no, hon.

No. It's a no, hon. It's a no, hon. Yeah. Oh, thanks, hon, but no. Next to that, a phoenix, the mythical bird. The football team. Not the football team, but the same symbol as the football team.

You could say I'm off to see the football phoenix. I reckon that would be good for people that are like making a comeback. How you doing, babe? Phoenix. Rising from the ashes. I'm rising from the ashes. Yeah, sort of very metaphorical. Yeah, I like that.

You could be bouncing back from a breakup to a hangover. Yeah. You know, a life-changing loss. You walk back into a party and people send a message being like, Hayley just did a Phoenix. She's back. She's rising from her ashes. Next is a chain being broken.

This isn't the exact order that the things I'm in, but I'm saving the best for last. A chain being broken. I'm breaking my shackles. I reckon like, I'm leaving that man. Yeah, breaking free. I'm leaving that man. Breaking will work. Yeah. Next is a brown mushroom.

Do you reckon That mushroom Is gonna overtake the eggplant It looks like Does it look like It looks like a head It's very heady I mean Heavy on the head

Nah Nah I mean you could use it If you wanted to indicate You just slept with A tanned person With a Chody penis

It could be right up your alley With a giant head on Is it really A big head There's already A white mushroom Isn't there Yeah I believe so Is there Are we rocking a button It could be right up your alley With a giant head on Is it really a head? There's already a white mushroom, isn't there? Yeah, I believe so Is there? Are we rocking a button?

I'm looking now, I'm looking now I can't see the button Okay, no I always thought there was a mushroom Oh, it might be a toadstool one under a different Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes Search emoji mushroom Lastly, of the major ones

A wedge of lime A lime wedge Yep, this lime. A lime wedge. Yep, this is good. A lime wedge. Because we only have the lemon, the full lemon. Full lemon. With leaf. But that's not the wedge.

It's the kiwi fruit. I thought we had a cross-section lime, but that's actually a kiwi. Yeah, we do. The wedge is great. That with a cocktail glass, the martini glass one, we have a margaritas. Very indicative. Some good new ones.

Some good new ones. And they were thinking about going a cross-section of a line, but everybody's still traumatised by all the viruses they gave their parents computed with LimeWire.

LimeWire. LimeWire was the dirtiest of peer-to-peer transfers. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Play ZM's Fletch Vornanale. Yesterday was a beautiful day in Auckland where we currently are,

where we reside, and I wanted to make the most of it and I decided to go home and lay down some towels. God, that sounded terrible. I said, what's going on? Really lay down some towels. No, lay down like a nice little area on the lawn for me. Right. Because Aaron wasn't home and I had nothing to do and it was just nice.

I did a little garage workout on the bike. And then I lay down this little area and I wanted to read a book in the sun and have a little sunbathe, which I don't condone. It's terrible for you. But boy, oh boy, did I do it. And when I was lying there, I whipped off my top because I am the owner of this home and we've got a well-fenced house.

Other than a little house at the back of our property where a tree's been removed that has a window. But I think they're like teenage son drums in there and good for him. You know what I mean? Good for him. If he was to cop an eyeful of what I've got. Of the old girl next door.

Yeah. Why not? We're all young men who copped an eyeful of one of the old girls. I'm just here to make memories for life. Memories with my mammaries. Memories with my mammaries. Memories with my mammaries. So I whipped off my top and I was lying there and reading my book,

whatnot, drinking a lovely water. And then as I was like my time in the sun is done, and I did well, no burn. So it was just a short little thing. I walked, I stood up and then I walked around the front of my deck and then I walked up the steps of my deck and I was on my deck. And our property's much higher than the property of our neighbours down there. So when we're on our deck, it's kind of like looking down on their property.

And I was like, it'll be all right. So I walked past and then I sort of looked over because our neighbours haven't moved in yet. And there are about four tradies who are working on repiling their house that had all just gone and stopped and looked at me. And I just went, waved and walked inside. Four tradies? Four tradies.

Wow. And they're tradies. They're the same ones that have been there. They've been there for like a couple of weeks. And they're all like, when I go for walks and I walk past their house, I'll always be like, hi, how's it going? All this kind of stuff. So they copped an eyeful.

The tradies saw the ladies. The tradies saw both the ladies. Wow. And instead of like running and ditching, I was like, nah, my house. And just went inside. Just embraced it. Yeah.

And then we were on our emails last night. Yeah. And I saw that Karwin had written down in her preparations that you had a bit of a flashing situation as well. Yeah. I mean, like, look, maybe not as drastic as yours, but I live in a three-story house. So I was walking down.

Okay, shit, rub it in. Wow. That's nice. Yeah, I have friends that can afford to buy a house. Yeah, nice. And I'm on the top floor. So I was coming down the stairs and sometimes I'm just... We call it the penthouse.

Yeah, sorry. I don't want to flex. And I was coming down the stairs and I was like, I'll just like chuck my top on as I'm coming down the stairs. Now on each little level of the stairs at the end of the step, there are windows that look into the courtyard, which we share with like multiple other townhouses. And as I'm like pulling my shirt on,

I see just like a, just a grown man just standing there, like very aghast. Like what has he just seen? Aghast like offended or stoked? Well, well, no,

I think just like, oh, like not sure what to do. Yeah. Daring headlights kind do. Yeah, right. Daring headlights kind of. Yeah, okay. Jeepers. I mean, I remember when I lived next to a,

when I was flatting at drama school and there was a bunk bed in the house next to us and the woman used to always be like starkers, like butt, boobs and the other things. And she used to always like climb up and down this thing and like the ladder of the bunk bed was facing, like the window looked right at it. So every time she climbed the ladder,

I'd like see her butt off. What was a fully grown, was she a fully grown woman? I know. What was she doing on a bunk a business man in a bunk seat. I know, it's quite a happy situation. More room for activities. More room for activities, hello. That means you were also sharing a room with somebody.

Yeah, I know. I don't know, there's something about seeing your neighbours nude. It feels very like unsexual. I sort of don't mind it. And I know, just give the back neighbour and the tradies an eyeful and your fellow neighbours, why not? I think your welcome is in order. You want them to thank you now.

Yeah. They could send over a hamper. Right, like a thank you hamper. I just brighten their day. Or they could send you a business card and say we actually specialise in repiling the old girls. I do not need a repiling the old girls. I do not need a repiling. Yesterday, I've been sort of trying to curate more who I follow

on Instagram because it's my chosen platform. I love it. I love spending time on it and I probably spend too much time on it. Okay. And there's just some there's just some content from a person who I know that is not to my taste and I find rather annoying. And so I made the decision finally to mute them. Now I didn't post a story yesterday. So now you don't unfollow. You haven't unfollowed.

Haven't unfollowed. Oh my God. Do you remember when you couldn't unfollow, you haven't unfollowed. Haven't unfollowed. Oh my god, do you remember when you couldn't unfollow and you had to, no sorry, when you couldn't mute and you just had to unfollow someone if they were annoying? And then they were like, why did you unfollow me? But now they don't know. Never ask in person. No. Oh, but some people do. Yeah.

Yeah, wow. And then they have to lie to you and say it was an accident. Yeah. And then you've got to re-follow them again. But I know that you guys have also unfollowed people of similar vein as of late. I just... No, I just mute. I'm a big fan of mute.

I said to Sade at the start of the year, I said this year... No, unfollow, that's what I mean. Sorry, mute. We're not going to say things behind people's back that we wouldn't say to their face. And she was like, ha, ha, ha. And I said, I guess I'm just going to have to say a lot of this stuff to their face. She was like, no, please don't.

We'll get uninvited to everything. I was like, perfect. What are they saying about us? What do you say about us? Well, Fletch Fridays are a hell of a day. It's where we just unload all of our Fletch for the night. Hayley Thursdays? Do you do Hayley Thursdays?

No. Hayley Saturday? More just a floating day. So you've just had enough? Had enough. And I want to know, I want to get some calls in of who have you muted lately and why? And you don't need to, I don't think we name people.

I think you just say like why. Like maybe it's the new person that's got a baby. Oh, yeah. We don't need names. I muted Jemima Crossington. That'd be nasty. To Jemima Crossington. Sort of the kind of person they are, maybe their relationship to you

and why you've muted them. Because we've all got our own reasons. Sometimes it's because like I follow a lot of food things, and when I'm, you know, watching what I eat, I don't need to be seeing cakes and pud, cakes and pud, breads and cakes and pud. Yeah, I love cakes and pud. But I don't want to unfollow it,

because inevitably this diet will fail, and I'm going to want some cakes and pud, some cakes and pud, some cakes and breads and pud. So they're still there. So they're still there, and I can rediscover them. But that's the thing. If something's not making you happy and you're seeing it pop up on Instagram

all the time, unfollow or mute it. Yeah, I know, but unfollow, you've got to be careful because sometimes people will see that and then you start a drama you didn't mean to start. You've got to curate your feed so it doesn't make you like sad. Yeah, exactly. It's got to serve you. Or annoyed when you see the same things.

Or make you go like this every time you're on Instagram. So this person that you have muted, we know them. We all know them. Yeah, you know them. Somebody just messaged in saying all the Monac girlies are getting muted. Who's Monac girlies? I Googled it and it's an MLM. It's a multi-level marketing.

Oh, right. Okay. Thing. So it's just the latest in the... Oh, yeah, they're getting a fat mute. Long line of that. I've followed, I've had friends, like long-time friends that get into like that kind of thing.

You've got a... Fat mute. Fat mute. Unfollow or fat mute. Fat mute or unfollow. It's a fat mute on that. Yeah. Yeah.

Well... Okay, well, let's take... There's some really good stuff coming in already. We want to know who you have muted or unfollowed on social media recently because I've finally muted someone who I just... She won't tell us. Had enough of the content.

She won't tell us and we know them. Yeah. Amazing. You know, they're going to notice when they see that, you know, you've always been viewing their story and now you're just not. No, they're not looking at that. I'm not that.

They're going to catch you out. They're going to look at who's viewing your story. I do it every now and then. Don't do that. Why? Just to see if Jason sees it. Anonymous has called. Anonymous, who have you muted and why?

I muted my dad because he got a Christmas present, which is 350-odd dad jokes, and he's posting more a day, and they're terrible. Wait a minute. Your dad for Christmas got 350 dad jokes? Yeah. Oh, no. Now, does he post himself telling the joke

or just a picture of the joke? Just a picture of the joke. He should be reading them out. He should be doing a little performance every day. Can you remember any of these jokes off the top of your head or you've muted too long now? I've muted too long. Talk about three days, I've heard, enough.

Will you unmute him after 350 days, or do you think you'll just leave it there? No, it's been quite peaceful, to be honest. Because a lot of people mute their dads because of the comments they make on news stories, inappropriate comments. Yeah, yeah. Anonymous, thank you.

Olivia, who have you muted and why? I have muted a couple of my neighbours and the apartment building group chat. See, I've got an apartment building group chat or a page. It's just good to know when the elevator's broken. And I've muted it, though. Yeah. You'll also know when the elevator's broken

when you push the button and it doesn't come. Is that a fair call? That's a dead giveaway. That's a dead giveaway. It's a dead giveaway. Or the door opens and there's no elevator there. Although you might not be paying attention,

you might just step into an open elevator shaft. Well, yeah, but if I'd read that on the group chat, you'd be alive and well. Yeah, you'd be alive and well. Olivia, what kind of things are happening on your group chat

that made you want to mute it so bad? Primarily just complaints about the manner in which the gardeners cut the exotic ornamental grasses. Oh, God. They don't want to cut the grasses themselves. Yeah.

But they also take issue with that. It's a lot of whinging. A lot of bin chat. A lot of parking chat. Bin chat! Yeah. Stuff that you don't need in your day. I totally get that. Olivia, thank you.

Some messages in. I muted my dad's wife because she's a bitch. That's pretty plain and simple there. I've muted my best friend's sister because she posts too many baby photos and I've seen more of this baby than I've seen of anybody else lately. I hide people I've said this before as soon as they get engaged because that's when it starts. Yeah.

You get the wedding photos and then they have the wedding and then they're posting photos. This is not at all directed to our friend, lovely friend, Dr. Sean. Who just posted a photo yesterday.

Yeah, that's fine. It's a lovely photo but don't post one every week for the next four years. Oh, yeah. Of the wedding photos. Of weddings. Anything. I think you get to do your top three on your feed. Oh, yeah. Of the wedding photos. Of weddings. Anything.

I think you get to do your top three on your feed. We need to establish a hard and fast rule on how long after your wedding anniversary is excluded. Yes, and then one once a year. Every anniversary? Sure. But you can see that. But those are your best photos of you as a couple. But you could also just put a photo up of you as a couple without it being a wedding photo.

But we need to put a sort of a rule on how long after the wedding you can keep milking the content. People go months and months and I'm like, and then I hide the engagement because then the babies are next and then the scan photos. No, the honeymoon's next. Oh, the honeymoon. Europe, don't want to see that.

We don't want to see that. And then the scans and then the babies and then Kate. You just don't want to see any of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Had enough. Yeah. Yeah. All right.

Actually, that's a great point. That could be a silly little poll. I mean, it's Carwin that raised that. God, they literally are all the same. They all look the same. One's a man with a moustache and the two other ones are interchangeable. The startings of a...

Oh, really? Do let them know. Rich from me, actually. I unfollowed my stepsister because her content was so cringe. She sent me a photo of her business stats to prove that I had unfollowed her. Yeah, I know. I know I unfollowed you. I pushed the button on purpose.

Yeah. I had to mute one of my best friend's girlfriends because she thinks she's Insta-famous. And now I'm just going to read ahead. This might have a few more identifiable features. Well, mum's just messaged on WhatsApp saying cat photos are okay aren't they my god botherer

brother-in-law new fad Christians are the worst he's just got into Jesus just found Jesus yeah well you know what it's like when you get a new hobby

you're very passionate about it at the start and you've got to catch up all that posting so much catching up all those psalms to post. Well, that's actually one point. Psalms, Psalms.

Psalms. That's one point towards your heaven total. Yeah. Every post. Oh, yeah. And if it gets a share, two points. Sort of a multi-level marketing thing. Yeah, okay.

Have you stumbled upon this one? I had to mute a mutual friend who constantly posts her yoga and positive energy peace vibes but the reality is she's a constant drama starter and shit stirrer and our mutual friend

just can't see it. Yeah. See, that's why you have to, you've got to curate your feed. I mute some people when they're really happy and I'm going through a rough patch. That's okay.

I don't need to see your joy. Also, the people posting that sort of stuff, it gets to the point where you're wondering if they're just trying to convince themselves. 100%.

Yeah. I have been muted by some of my friends because I went on a two-month holiday and it started making me depressed while they were at work, so they muted. Yeah, it was that first European summer after all the lockdowns were over that a few people got a temporary mute. Last year was unreal, eh? Yeah. Can you mute just for a month?

Or is it forever? No, that's on Facebook. Oh, that's on Facebook, right. Facebook, you can snooze them for a month. Okay. Local woman I had to mute her. She goes on about building an empire with brilliant budgeting and saving tips,

but she's a trust fund baby who's arrived at school in a limousine. It ain't your supermarket coupons that did that, love. I love it. New Zealanders will put you in your place in a second. Absolutely. Fat unfollow for anyone who ever posts a picture or video of themselves crying.

Oh, yes. Or anyone that's like, you won't believe what's happened. Imagine a feeling, an emotion, and being like, hang on, camera on the dashboard. Camera, it's just the hair. Hey, guys.

You want to start the crying before you press record so that when you do that again. No, no, no, no, no, no. You want to start crying before you press record so that when you do that again. No, no, no. You press record. Then you get good so you can see yourself and then you've got to go and then you'll do an edit. And then you edit. I'm a millennial. I'll do a millennial pause at the start. I'll press record and then give it a second to make sure

it's recording and then start my piece. And then two seconds at the end where you find the stop button. That's good stuff. Trying to tap the screen. That's good stuff. Oh, there's lots of... Some of them are too identifying,

but yes. Right, okay. Yes, me too. I'm muted by Nana because she's a bitch. Oh my God, Nana's a bitch. I don't want to cause drama with her and my parents.

Okay. So do you think they're just like, I'll stay out of it instead? Yeah. Oh, someone suggested if you want to post multiple wedding photos, do a reel with multiple photos,

each that lasts 1.5 seconds. Put a nice song on. Done. One post. You'll find I think you'll find that it's that people want to post every week.

1.5 seconds lingers on the photos too long. I'd do one second. I would never do one. I reckon you're looking at your.6s of a second. Yeah, seconds. Every three days. It lingers on the photos too long. I'd do one second. I would never do one. I reckon you're looking at your.6s. Yeah, right. Yeah, okay. .5 or.7.

The song has to be like a folky cover of a rock song. Yeah. Done by a female going, Hey, young. Oh, my hero. I was literally going to do a Foo Fighters song. I was going to do times like these. It's times like this. Sunset shots at a wedding.

Every car ad. It's times like these. Play it. CDM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day Now this week's Fact of the Day themed week is Origins of Words I've got heaps I've got 1, 2, 3, 4, five, six, seven, eight, nine,

and only one, two, three days left to go. Good counting from you. Well, can we get three each day? I could actually just make it a double week. No. Oh, okay. Just pick the best ones. No, because I like getting here on Monday night and getting an exciting new thing.

Yeah, although next week we're going to do the long weekend, aren't we? Oh, yeah. Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. Oh, sure. Okay, then let's do it. Origin week and a half. Origin week and a half. Origin week and a half. That works great.

Okay. Because they are good. They're good. Yeah. I've got one day that we could probably squeeze in a few animals where animals got their titles from because they're really cute. Should we do that today? No.

I want to do Nightmare today. He's so excited. I want to do Nightmare today because last night I had like a- Vaughn, take a breath. I had a proper nightmare. Did you? What take a breath. I had a proper nightmare. Did you? I had a proper nightmare. My friend Callum, we all know him, turns up at my house looking like disheveled as,

like shipwrecked for months. And he's got two, well, he's got a box, a wooden crate, and on top of it is a doll. Now, it turns out the doll's a haunted doll. He's like, I need you to look after this. Like a horror nightmare. It's something he would do is turn up with a haunted doll for you to deal with. and then the joke is

as soon as I accept it, it's my curse. Yeah. And he's just like, hey, can you look after this? I'm like, yeah,

sure. And he's like, ha, bye. And leaves me with a haunted doll. So he turns up with this haunted doll and a case of very dangerously unstable dynamite.

That's what's in the wooden crate. And he's like, we just need to hold on to this for a bit. I'm like, what is this? And he cracks it open. He's like, it's unstable dynamite. And the dynamite's like sweating, which tells me it's wildly unstable. It's about to blow.

So I'm like, well, we can't put that in the shed because it'll explode. Yeah. Because it gets hot in the shed. So we found a cool place under the house and put the dynamite under the house. Of course, why not? Perfect place.

That's way better than the shed, under the house where you live. The haunted doll went on a shelf in the house. Yeah. In one of the girls' rooms. Why would you do that? They had kids and, right, it's a doll. I still at this stage didn't know it was haunted.

I just thought it was creepy. But he said, we can't hide this. It's got to be able to see. Okay. And then the doll just like haunted me for the rest it was creepy. But he said, we can't hide this. It's got to be able to see. Okay. And then the doll just like haunted me for the rest of the dream. Did you have a lot of cheese last night or some kind of tramadol? And some chocolate. During this all, my friend Orban rang and he said, Arlo has decided to have Pokemon

surgery. And I said, what's Pokemon surgery? And he said, he's transitioning into a Pokemon. And I was like, oh, okay. Sweet as man. And he's like, yeah, yeah. We're all good with it. I'm like, yeah, that's, you've got to be good with your kids' decisions. Anyway, Callum's here with dynamite and a haunted doll, so I've got to go. So it was all, and then the doll started doing haunted things and I kept screaming, is this a dream, is this a dream?

And the doll was like holding me down. So anyway, I thought, this coincidentally I'd looked up. This was your nightmare. This was my nightmare. Why are nightmares called nightmares? Wait, how did it end? Did you just wake up and that was it? Because it's a at the start of the week. This was your nightmare. This was my nightmare. Why are nightmares called nightmares? Wait, how did it end? Did you just wake up and that was it?

Because it's a mare that happens in the night. I think the doll was trying to get inside me. Now, not through my bum. I think... Through your mouth? No, it was like

opening me up. Like trying to cut me to go inside and then... The thoughts were it was going to use... It was going to get inside and be able to control my body.

Right. How was it getting it? It was going to cut through my stomach to get into it. But how did its plastic hands hold the scalpel? It was like Chucky did it. Because it doesn't have fingers. Yeah. But anyway, it was like a porcelain creepy doll.

Okay. I'm going to be off them for a little while. Okay. Because, you know, I was big on them. Oh, your whole collection's going to go. My whole collection of porcelain dolls is going to go. You've got like 40 of those. I know, I know, but now they all scare me.

So, nightmare. Where does it come from? Well, night, fairly self-explanatory. That's when you sleep. But what about mare? Having a mare. The first person to have a nightmare was the mayor of the town. No.

My friend used to always say mare and her whole Lebanese family said it. Anything to do with Lebanon? Mayors? No, I don't know about that. What about horses? Is there a crossover with horses? You would think because it is spelt like mayor as in female horse.

But a mayor is actually a female goblin. And it was believed that when you were having a nightmare, a female goblin was sitting on you, holding you down, suffocating you, entangling you in her hair, which is a mare lock to tie somebody up with like, to be engulfed and cocooned with hair is a mare lock.

This is a nightmare. And then would put the bad thoughts into your head that you would have a nightmare. So it was night, at night, a mare, a female goblin would sit on you, wrap you up with their hair in a mare, a female goblin would sit on you, wrap you up with their hair in a mare lock. Yeah. And put the bad thoughts into your head.

Because, you know, my mum had sleep paralysis once when she was a kid and it was like a creature, a female creature sitting on her chest and she was suffocated and couldn't breathe. That was a literal mare. That was a literal mare. She was having a mare goblin. That was a little goblin. Wow. So today's fact of the day is the word, the term nightmare comes from the fact that it

was believed in ancient times that if you were having a bad dream, it's because a mare, a female goblin, was sitting on you while you slept. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. We've been watching We've got a chat called Love Island Girlies Now I see Georgia was added to the chat Producers We've been watching, well, we've got a chat called Love Island Girlies. Now, I see Georgia was added to the chat, producers. Now, you've got to be careful because if you've been bad-mouthing Georgia, she can scroll up and see every other message in that chat.

Can she? That's what we were aiming for. Yeah, yeah. We wanted to know how we feel. This is the thing. If you add someone to a group chat, you're better to start a whole new group on Messenger. Definitely. Yeah, it is awkward when you're added late and you can see that it's been going for literally weeks without you and you're like, oh, thanks. Late invite.

And we just thought we'd dive into it a little bit. Now, spoiler alert, perhaps if you're watching Love Island All Stars, which is on TVNZ Plus at the moment, we're like a day behind the UK, which is like not too bad, right? Yeah, if you're not following anyone, I feel like you can avoid spoilers mostly. I had to unfollow really quickly because it's contestants from previous years back for a second chance. And like the chat, the chat is just popping off.

Like we're all so invested. Yeah. Like who would you say is your favourite at the moment? Oh, just anyone but Mitch. Missy Mitch is such a dick. He's so embarrassing. Maybe Anton, actually.

Anton. He's come king behaviour. Yeah, I know, but that's why no one wants to shag Anton. Anton is like a Scottish, very handsome but very polite, and so he keeps getting friend zoned with everyone. Oh, right, okay. Yeah, and then any time the girls say something to him as a friend, like, oh my God, like Messy Mitch,

he's been saying this, then Anton goes up to Messy Mitch and is like, hey mate, don't do this, and it causes all this drama. Right. And then the other day, Liberty, who was my favourite for many many many seasons ago, she has like been absolutely shunned in the friendship zone for so long. Is that her real name?

Liberty. That is her name. Liberty and she's all about freedom. No, it's not. It's not her real name. She's giving herself that name. Do you think she's hot? Yeah, hot. Why does no one ever pick her? Because her name's Liberty and she talks about freedom. She sounds like an absolute plumbish. Liberty.

And Liberty, like they do these challenges right where they've got to kiss people And Liberty, oh my god She absolutely went for it She went for it and I'm proud of her What do you mean she went for it? So they go like Pash the hottest guy Other than the person you're coupled up with

And you've got to choose two guys that you think are quite cute in the villa and Liberty who's been like absolutely chosen by no one, friend zoned the whole time she just, she like did a lift up jump on, she lifted a man, no no no like jumped on a man and wrapped around

and then did a full thing and we were proud of her. And the boys really went for it too which is why I'm like, why are you not picking her? Yeah, I know. She's the purest soul ever. Your bar of being proud of people is quite low. No! If all it

took was a pash. Kim Bourne and I talk about World War II on TV shows now. No. Come on! And then the other day on the couch, there's talk about masters of the air? There's two exes in the villa right? There's two exes in the villa and then they were playing a truth or dare game and they asked

the guy who do you think is hot or something. He was like and put up. Like give me a better question than that and then one of the other guys was like okay how many people have you slept with since breaking up with Molly who's in the villa and they're still toying with the idea of getting back together. Where is this villa?

It was only six months between the breakup. Six months between the breakup. Hear me out. What about this? No, hang on. You've got to hear his number first. Okay. 16.

Over six months. And one every 11 days. My goodness. Oh, my God. Rookie numbers. Fletch. Fletch is like 16 over six months. Oh, yes.

That's terrible. That's terrible. 16 straight hookups. Wow. That's quite a lot. Okay. And, like, he'd been in a three-and-a-half-year relationship. With this person.

With this girl. So it's not like you're doing one every 11 days. Surely he took, like, two weeks to grieve. Or maybe he didn't. I don't know. Maybe that's how he grieved. Anyway, what I'll say about the land invasion of Europe. surely he took like two weeks to grieve or maybe he didn't I don't know maybe that's how he grieved it's crazy anyway what else about

the land invasion of Europe when it finally came to it hear me out because you know Masters of the Era started with you should be watching that because it's got the hot guy in it

it's not that it's not that Jared is fully our way but he straddles the fence no but hear about okay hear me out hybrid TV show it's Love Island

all stars or contestants fighting the Nazis in World War II. No, the Nazis would have them. We can't let the Nazis get a foothold. I'd love a picture-in-picture. If I could have a little Love Island with Nazis getting shot. Any kind of World War II Nazi thing.

Yeah, right. Jack Reacher bashing heads and then Liberty sitting on the thing. Yeah, Liberty would be good in the war because she's about freedom. And she is about liberty. Exactly. And Hannah would be good. She's got two bloody.

She's my favourite. If these are the best that they had in the late 30s, early 40s, we'd all be speaking bloody German. Thank you for giving us this moment. Just bring the group chat on here. Producer Carwin, you, I feel like you've read too much into this. Okay. You've seen one TikTok and now you're scared for your life.

No. Clore clips, they're here to kill us. At least three TikToks. Oh, okay. Well, we take it back. That's a solid majority. How dare we? Yeah.

So what have you read about claw clips? I'm actually wearing a claw clip today. I never wear them because my hair's too thin for that. This is the ones where you clip them open like a bulldog clip. Like jaws. Like jaws. And then they keep your hair in a bun. Yeah, so I don't really.

Is that it? Am I doing great? Am I doing good? You're doing well there, actually. Did I do good? For a man without hair it was really good actually. Yeah fantastic.

Thank you. So as a girlie with quite long hair and quite thick hair sorry Hayley I recently had it thinned anyways. I know

Karwin I have the thinnest hair you could ever imagine. Karwin got her hair thinned and my first reaction was like did you keep it?

The stuff that they took out and could we weave it into mine? No, it was like a pile big enough to be a small animal. Anyways, so I wear claw clips a lot of the time, right? Because it gets hot. But on TikTok, a girl showed a story about how she got into a car crash, you know, when someone, is it T-bone you?

Hit you from behind? Rear-end. Rear-ending. T-bone's you when they hit you in the side. Oh, okay. Rear-ended her. And she had a claw clip in. Now she was fine except for the fact that the claw clip got stuck in her

head. I sort of know she had photos. It was the owl. Because of what? She bounced back onto the headrest. Into the seat. And obviously the bit that does the clawing went into her head. Oh, because I guess

like once, if it was open, I've just got mine out to show the boys. If it was open like that, right, and the log of hair is in there, then the spikes, the claws. Yeah, they're open. But it's so plastic. It's so plastic. I know, but then I was like, oh gosh, no, surely it's a one-off. No, they're open. But it's so plastic. It's so plastic. I know. But then I was like, oh gosh, no, surely it's a one-off.

No, nurses have come out and said, girlies, take them out when you're driving. They've also said pay us more. Yeah, well, they deserve that. For sure. They do, they do. They deserve more because one woman said, I've had to remove three of these from girls' heads.

Ew. Ew. So now I'm terrified of that happening to me because I don't trust other drivers. So I was looking into soft claw clips. They don't exist. That's called scrunchie. Yeah, literally what I found.

But you can get flat lay ones. So I've sent you the little link in the group chat. Kmart. Yeah, so instead of it kind of doing jaws, it sort of chomps down sideways. Yeah, it's like an alligator sideways. So there's only teeth on one side. Oh, right.

Okay. These have been around forever as well. And it would sit flat. I know, but these aren't in the zeitgeist as much. And they're not so easily found. This is the first time I've seen them. But how do you know that these nurses aren't just plants? Kmart.

Kmart plants. Kmart plants. And they're trying to peddle their soft, flat clips. Feels like that. Large. Fair enough. Take my $7. Designed to wear flat at the back of your head

so you can wear your hair clipped up in comfort while you lie down, drive, or go about your day. Because it is like when you drive with a claw clip, the head, and you're often like, eh. And lying down. I never thought about lying down. You can't wear them to the gym because if you drive with a claw clip, the head and you're off in the air. And lying, I never thought about lying down. You can't wear them to the gym because if you lie down on a bench, you just got to take it out. Right.

Okay, so get the flat one. Yeah. And I love it. It's great, isn't it? I got it yesterday, used it yesterday. Seven buck. So good. Seven buck.

I think if you had quite thick hair, like thicker than mine, it's not going to work. Use a hair net. It's not. Get a hair net. I've seen a lot of those in the, you know, back of restaurants and kitchens. They look very sexy. Yeah, they are. I won't have a word against them.

Yeah, I don't know that that's what did it for you. Lovely long locks and a hair net. Blue plasters. It's chef chic. Blue plasters and a hair net. Okay, if you had to rate, review or marry Fletch, Vaughn or Hayley, what one would it be? Okay, I would marry Hayley. I would have sex.

Wait, which one is it? No, no, no, no. It's only rate, review, marry. Oh, okay. No comment. I'd have sex with the podcast. I don't know how that would work. Give us a sexy little review though.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.