ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 3rd September 2024

Episode Date: September 2, 2024

Top 6: Roads Vaughan would makeSilly Little Poll: Takeaways of home cooking?Kmart vibrating massageHard work is a scamShannon's hacksFact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Thank you Bryn. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Two minutes past six. Morena. Morena. Morena. Morena. Morena.

Morena. Do you know what you're doing for the top six yet? Yeah, top six things in my three year transport plan. Okay. I just hear Simone Brown has said that she's got great plans. Simeon. No, that's a monkey. Simone Brown has plans for three years to spend $33 billion. Woo!

On some nice new roads. Quote. I think New Zealand is sick and tired of the amount of money going into cycleways. I just want a little bit of that. Do you know what I mean? Carve me off a bill. Just a tiny slither of $33 billion. Why don't you have a car?

It would just be nice for a little bit of cash payment. Cash, cash money. Cash money. Cash payment. That would be nice. I would actually stop driving my car for a billion dollars. Would you? Okay.

I would. How would you get to work? I wouldn't come to work with quite a billion dollars. You're crazy. Of course. You're a crazy man. Helicopter. If I needed to.

Yeah, nice. If I had to come into a workplace. If I had to come into a workplace. If I had to come into a workplace. Chopper. Chopper man. Do choppers use a lot of petrol? Is it problematic? Heaps.

Heaps, yeah it is. Tons of gas. You'd be cancelled. Damn it. There is a solar powered helicopter. You don't know if that works at 4am. You don't want to fly through the clouds. That too.

So the top six are dealing with this big announcement. Yeah, the top six. dealing with this big announcement. Yeah, the top six plans for... Oh, we've lost him. He's dead. He takes a bit of time in the morning. He takes a bit of time to warm up. He does. It's okay. I've rebooted.

My top six things in my three year transport plan. Great. I don't know. I haven't priced it all out yet. Play it. ZM's Fletchford and Hayley's. You know what's a scam? What?

Hard work, apparently. And this is great news for me. I could have told you that. I reckon I work pretty hard at some things some of the time. You are probably one of the hardest working people I know. I work a lot. You work a lot. But sometimes it's not particularly hard.

Quality over quantity. That's my slogan. That's your lot. But sometimes it's not particularly hard. Quality over quantity. That's my slogan. That's your slogan. Three hour work day. You've read my new book. I've made it better than the four hour work day. You're the three hour work day. Have you seen that guy who thinks he's hacked life and he gets

three days into one day? Have you seen that on Instagram? No. My first day starts from 3am to 9am. That's my one day. Have you seen that on Instagram? And he's like, my first day starts from 3 a.m. to 9 a.m. That's my first day. Then I've got my second day, that's 9 a.m. till 2 p.m. Now I've got two days in one day. And you're like, shut up, dude.

Have a break. Go for a walk. Eat a banana. The reason I want to talk about hard work is because there's a study out of, this is from London, but they looked at people from the US, UK, France, Nigeria, China, Sweden, and Japan. Now that's a pretty out of, this is from London, but they looked at people from the US, UK, France, Nigeria, China,

Sweden and Japan. Now, that's a pretty good cross-reference. However, we're not involved. No. It's fine. And examined the importance that people place on hard work in life. And basically, it's declining. And we, as a species, as humans,

are basically being exposed to the fact that hard work does not lead to a happier life necessarily and that things like human connection and time with loved ones are more important and so people are calling it a big scam. It went on Reddit, this study, and then the comments were just like, oh yeah, especially Gen Z,

who were like, hard work is the biggest scam of all. We're promised if we work hard, we get a good life, and that is no longer proving to be true. And so people are going, these are the things that you should place importance on. Travel, time with family, connections with people, making friends. Perfectly cooked steak. Hasselback potatoes. But then also-

How are we affording Hasselback potatoes in travel? Well, that's what I was going to say on the flip side. To be able to afford the travel and the steaks, you've got to work hard to get paid to afford the travel and the steaks. No, but they don't have to work hard to... Exactly. You don't have to work hard. Smart, just work smart.

I think this leads back to, you know, things we've talked about before where people are saying, you can have a job that gives a bare minimum, gives you enough money that you are able to do the things that you like and just do enough and then enjoy the rest of the time. I get it kind of,

but in some environments it doesn't work. You kind of have to work hard. Yeah. Don't choose that environment. Yeah, but what if... What if everybody didn't want to be a doctor? Oh, tough titties. We're dead. We die.

But, like, what a great last decade. But arguably you do have to work quite hard to become a doctor. There's no real easy route. I'm saying you don't have to work hard. But some people do. Why? So that we have doctors. Yeah, I know, but if we don't have doctors,

that's what I said, like, we just universally decide that we're going extinct and we just do what we've got to do. God, if everyone was like you, we'd be screwed. We'd be so screwed. We'd have a few years left. What if you get in trouble? Now we've got no lawyers.

Well, there'd be no law. What if you're having so much fun? It's the Wild West. What if you're having so much fun that you engage in one of the funnest things there is to do as a human being? Lovemaking. Yes. And you haphazardly impregnate a woman and then you give birth to

a human child and there's no one there to teach that child anything. Which is research. Because I'd say training to be a teacher is pretty hard work. Are you kidding me? It's in this holidays? Isn't it like course? Void. It's like TK. I think you need to tell our lovely teachers listening now that you were being sarcastic. No, teachers know I've got a lot of love.

Teachers know I've got a lot of love. I was being silly. But then I don't think people who've got to love the teaching. You've got a dumb kid in a lawless society who's going to get sick. Perfect. Only the strong will survive. Oh, God. I think people are a bit hard work adverse, but you know what I mean. perfect only the strong will survive oh god oh god people

I think people are a bit hard work adverse but you know what I mean yeah well you're a hard worker you would say that you're a hard worker yeah and look how happy I am

yeah and look how happy and thriving I am that's the face of a happy woman yeah yeah look at the joy bleeding out of my face

right now yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah Look at the joy bleeding out of my face right now. Yeah. And I haven't even had any Botox in this face.

So they don't see it as hard work. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like there'll always be someone to be a doctor because someone's going to find that enjoyable. Yeah. Thank God for those people because it's not me.

It's not me. And then when they're doing their enjoyable work, they find out they can earn way more doing it in Australia. So off they go. So off they trot. Off they trot. And soon enough, we're going to be living in a lawless society. Oh my God.

A lawless, uneducated society. A society with a low minimum wage. Oh, that's great. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the Top Six. Well there, well there, well there,

well there, well there, well there. Hello, government to spend $33 billion on transport over the next three years. And I think New Zealanders are sick and tired of the amount of money going into cycleways, says Simeon Brown. That's quite rude. I've got a bicycle. And cycleways are like not just for getting to work. People are doing cycleways for tourism, aren't they? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I use them when I'm on the scooters. I scooted around town yesterday. It was fun. The cycleways are very helpful. The shops don't like them because they take away the parks outside their shops. Tough, tough bickies. That's what I say. Hard being a shop.

Yeah, it's hard being a shop. It's hard being a shop. I've run a shop or two in my time. Have you? Yep. Okay. You worked at a gas station. Oh, no, I was talking about playing shops.

Oh, right. As a kid, that's how hard it is. No, as an adult. With my kids. Oh, with your kids. Yeah, and sometimes they don't have the right change. Yeah. And, you know, they'll try to pocket things.

Do you bankrupt them? I've done a bit of shops. Yeah, good. Yeah. The program, what, they'll try to pocket things. Do you bankrupt them? I've done a bit of shops. Yeah, good. Yeah. The program, what's it going to do here? Delivers on the agreement to reintroduce the successful Roads of National Significance program. Gets back to basics, focusing on reducing the number of potholes. That's good.

No one likes a pothole. No one likes a pothole. Supports reliable public transport services and delivers four new major public transport projects. That sounds all right to me. Ensurers, councils are doing their best. Let's get some imagination. Here's my top six things in my three-year transport plan. Number six on the list.

We start harnessing giant thistle seeds. Tell me more. Well, you know, you see a fairy floating through the sky. That's a thistle seed. Is it? We genetically engineer giant thistle seeds. Okay. And we jump off our roof with them and we hold on like on Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.

But how do you steer them? You don't. Okay. You're at the whins whimsy. Okay. They are thistle seeds. And if you catch them, you can make a wish. Make a wish.

Magic wish. And if you, because dandelions. Is it dandelions? Dandelions. Yeah. And they look like little parachutists. They're cool. Dandelions are lovely.

Don't blow the thistle seeds. We don't need more thistles. Number five on that. Thistles. Thistles. What a fun word. What a lovely word

to say. Thistle sifter. Thistles. I'm a thistle sifter. Number five on the list of the top six things in my three-year transport plan, human-sized matchbox car tracks. Oh, we find... That's just NASCAR.

Do they have loops? Yeah, it is. It's basically just NASCAR. No, no, it's not NASCAR because it's like public transport options. Like you get in your matchbox car and then you put it in the loader. Do the backwards one. And it goes, boom! And it fires car, and then you, like, put it in the loader. Do the backwards one. And it goes, boom! And it fires you on, and then you're like,

I'm going to work! Yeah. A fun way to get to work. That's real fun. And then you go around a loop. And then when you start to slow down, you go through one of those battery-powered things that we never had when we were kids.

No, we didn't. Speed them up again. Poor. Number four on the list. Did you call me a whore? No, poor. I said poor. We Number four on the list. Did you call me a whore? No, poor. No, I said poor. We're just slipping that in.

Whore. Number four on the list of the top six things in my three-year transport plan. I was like, why was I a whore? I was a child without a matchbox. Then we said poor. I poverty shamed you. Okay, number four on the list of the top six things in my three-year transport plan. Penny Farthings. Oh, okay. What a funny bike. Yeah, but in my three-year transport plan, penny farthings.

Oh, okay. What a funny bike. Yeah, but now there's no bike, there'll be no cycle lanes. I'm not riding a penny farthing over a speed bump. All those low signs under shops. Yeah, then there were cycle lanes in the early 1900s and people were penny farthing about. Yeah, true. Now they just have like gravel roads.

Yeah, they got it done. Have you seen that guy in downtown Auckland on that? It's like a hoverboard except it's one wheel. Yeah, it's so embarrassing. A unicycle. But they lean. They lean into it and he wears a full-faced visor. Yeah.

Oh, no, I haven't seen that. I have. He looks like Robo-Duck off DuckTales. It embarrasses me. He whizzed past us on Sunday. We were going for a light stroll after Yumcha and we were all just like, what the hell is that? The future, Vaughan.

It's the future. Yeah. Maybe that should be my transport plan. Maybe. Number three on the list of the top six things in my three-year transport plan, horses, more horses. Oh, yeah. Go backwards, not...

Oh, but they poo everywhere. Have you been to an old town overseas and they've got horses and carriages? No, you put those poo buckets underneath. Ah, there's always something that gets out. Have you been to an old town overseas and they've got horses and carriages? No, you put those poo buckets underneath. There's always something that gets out. Sloppier than anticipated, Aaron. A little flops out. Number two on the list of the top six things about three-year transport plans.

Skateboards, they're back. Are they? Do you know what? I had the thought the other day that maybe I could learn how to skate. Somebody told me that. Excuse me. I would look hot. I learned to skateboard when I was about your age. Yeah. Young lady.

Can you say that again? Can you say that again? Because when I was... When my kids were at... So it would have been like 20. Yeah. I reckon I was about your age when I learned to skateboard. I think I can do it. And when you fall, ouch. Oh yeah,

when you fall, it hurts. Yeah. And people are like And when you fall, people are like, oh, no. Just hang on to the fence and kind of push yourself around the tennis court. Yeah, yeah, I'll do that. Well, that's what I used to get the kids to tell me on their bikes. Like, resistance training. Don't you think it would look cool? Don't you think that would be a cool thing for me to do? Skateboarder.

I would wear a helmet, though, because I'm not an idiot. And knee pads. And wrist guards and knee pads and wrist guards and elbow pads oh 100% number one number number one

on the list of the top six things of my three year transport plane paper airplanes they're flimsy flimsy how are we going to

grab onto those did you see the embarrassing paper airplane that Hayley folded the other day I'm so bad at it yeah did they not teach you

at private school? No. Okay. We were learning science and math. If your kids go to private school, you should teach them how to make a paper airplane because it was truly embarrassing. Yeah, it's embarrassing. I know it's embarrassing.

I'm not even going to fight it. Terrible. That is today's Top 6. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. You have had a bad back in the past, Vaughan, and every now and then I'll knuckle you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Lower back.

It's always a bit stiff in the morning. Get going. Well, that's just getting old, isn't it? Yeah. Get out of your lazy bed. I've got a pinched nerve in my left shoulder and a weird nerve thing in the leg. Fletch, you've got a shoulder injury on the go.

Well, you're in luck for the small price of $10. I don't know if this is going to fix whatever is going on in my shoulder. Here's the description. Okay. Massage your... This is on kmart.co.nz. Yep. Massage your shoulders, neck and back with ease using this vibration massager.

Okay. Perfect for relaxing after a long day of work. Features two vibration settings and shaped for... Why'd you roll your eyes at only two vibration settings? Not enough variety. Use your imagination. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

What about the one that starts off, goes on and then goes on and then goes on and then goes on and then Shaped for... Great for the shoulder?

Really great for the shoulder when it's like... Oh, good. That one. The features, two vibration settings. Yeah, they just drive to the end. Shape for personal shoulder, neck and back massage. Is it like a wand?

It is a wand with a slight... What? I'm going to call it a hook in a come hither motion. That is not... That was a shower head. Yeah, that is not a personal massage. I mean,

it's a personal massage but not for the shoulder. So, literally, oh, sorry. It's $10, vibration massager

at Kmart. Well, that's why it's only got two settings. It's $10. Yeah, oh no, Rechargeable

or is it run off the mains? Plug it into the wall? Yeah. It is USB-C chargeable. It'll be rechargeable. Four AAA batteries, not rechargeable. Oh, that's not going to last.

That's terrible. That's embarrassing. It's not safe in the shower either. No, it's not. So this was announced as, you know, one of the exciting new Kmart things. And boy, oh boy, the comments have gone absolutely feral. I bet they have.

Everyone's like, is it showerproof? Is it showerproof? Can you use it in the shower? Is it waterproof? Like, what are we doing here? Kmart, what are you doing here? And already on the website, completely out of stock in most of Auckland.

A lot of sore shoulders, I guess. Yeah, a lot of sore shoulders. A lot of, I guess, because we're a big working city. Can you check the regions location-wise on the website? Where do we want to go? The regions are dirty, dirty birds. Do you reckon there's any left in Hamilton? Have a little look at Hamilton.

Shit, no. Hamilton will be able to stop from pre-order for years. Hamilton Central. Low stock. Low, of course there is. There's some in Te Rapa. Bayfair in stock. Okay, good.

So that's your... Conservative, conservative....todonga. Well, good. So that's your Tauranga. Well, not today when they hear about these $10 shoulder massages. Now, I genuinely don't know. Okay, I was like, $10 is great, but the AA's put me off. The AAA's. You're going to be going through batteries. You'll be spending $10 on batteries.

Not great for travel as well. Yeah. I've just found on, I just Googled cheapest vibrator. For the shoulders? Nah. I just thought vibrator, it could be anything. Oh, Vaughn, we were dancing around this. Oh, for God's sake.

We were doing a beautiful waltz over here. It's one of a massage gun off Teemu for $18, and that's rechargeable via USB-C. I am not putting a Teemu. No, it's a massage gun. This is a massage gun. Oh, yeah, I've got a Timu massage gun. It's fine, but it's soft.

You almost could. Do you know what I mean? And then there's another one that literally is like, it's got a series of rollables. That's $28. Yeah. But then there's a $5.19 mini keychain portable fully chargeable massager. Quote, unquote. On your keychain. On your keychain portable fully chargeable massager.

Yeah. Quote unquote. On your keychain. On your keychain. Very bold. For $5. Yeah, there's some. Well, you never know.

You might be stuck in traffic. You never know. Yeah, the absolute gridlock in Auckland. Sometimes takes two hours. Then you've got to take your keys out of the car. I was all over the road. Oh. Women drivers, am I right?

Play it. It's Fletchford and Hayley. Play it. It's Fletchford and Hayley. Silly little poe. Silly little poe. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little poe. Silly little poe.

Silly little poe. Silly little poe. Silly little boy, silly little boy, silly little boy, silly little boy, silly little boy. Well, a study that we really didn't need, eight in ten Americans find that they're too tired and exhausted after work to cook. I'm simply too tired. I can't possibly do it. Yeah, well, I was yesterday. I'm working in the days and evenings after radio and got home at nine o'clock last night and just went, no, I went to bed. Wow, no food. We had schnitzel, but it was thick.

Schnitzel? Put the H in there. Put the H where it belongs. Schnitzel. The schnitzel was too thick. No, we all agreed. It's supposed to be super thin. It was twice as thick

as it needed to be. You're just having a sort of lame steak. I know. Lame crumb steak. What the steak? We asked for still a little poll.

Did you cook last night? What was is for tonight's dinner? Because we asked yesterday afternoon. 88% of people said home cooking. 8% said takeaways.

5% said other. Can I say in this screenshot that we've got, Fletch, it's your gif, and it's you doing chef's kiss, but it's paused, and it looks like you're token, looks like you're taking a huge drag on a little token, a ganja

cigarette. Also, we asked this question on the worst night possible, because everybody's being healthy on a Monday, and a Tuesday, and then Wednesday, they're like, takeaways. Out in the wild,

northwest, a lot of things are closed on Mondays. They take that off. A lot of hospo is. And see, if we'd asked this on a Thursday or a Friday night, I reckon it would be flipped.

No groceries. 100%. Okay, we asked people what they're having for dinner. How's this? I mean, overwhelmingly a home-cooked meal on a Monday.

Michelle said, Tonight it's home-killed corned beef cooked in a slow cooker all day, mashed potatoes, steamed broccoli, Brussels sprouts, peas and corn, cheese and mustard sauce

from Pepper and Me. People love Pepper and Me. Love Pepper and Me. Do you have the Pepper and Me? No, what's Pepper and Me? It's a New Zealand company. It's herbs, spices, rubs, mixes. Sauces.

It's like sweet, savoury. It's amazing. Huge range. Very, and they do one called the man rub. The kiwi salt one's good. Yeah. It's got joropito in it. You love a man rub, do you?

You dirty boy. You dirty boy. I love the dirty boy. I've been given, given, given, given and receiving a man rub. Okay, good. Got some good recipes for me? Yep. Good.

So that sounds pretty, nothing like coming home from work to a roast in the crock pot. Yeah, coming home to the crocky, the smell. Yeah, it's like electric nana. I didn't crock pot at all this winter. And now I can't because it's summer. No, it's spring. It's early spring. No, they don't work.

They stop working in winter. Do they? Okay. September 1st. Kaylee says absolutely forced domestication on Monday because everything's closed. Yep. Yep. Samantha, homemade butter chicken.

Oh, yum. At Samantha's house. Laurie, tonight's a bachelor's handbag buns and cong slaw. Yum. Buns and slaw. That's pretty much homemade takeaways, isn't it? Yeah. It's takeaways. Effectively, you've done nothing, but you're just eating it at home. That's pretty much homemade takeaways, isn't it? Yeah. It's takeaways. Effectively, you've done nothing, but you're just eating it at home.

That's good stuff, though. Beth, freeze the lasagna to the rescue tonight. Thanks to my mum for helping her grown-up daughter survive, plus her grandbabies. Thanks, Mum. So Beth's mum, top-tier work. Yeah, good stuff. How would you defrost the lasagna?

I would hope I have the nous to do it the day before. Yeah, because you wouldn't want to heat it from frozen. I don't love defrosting things on the bench. Mints on the bench all day. Yeah. I don't know. I don't love it. Why not?

I don't know. I just prefer to do it in the fridge. Go and deliver a little. Roll the dice. No, I had some dodgy chicken last week. Yeah. And lived to tell the tale. It's just off tinge. Do you know what I mean? Itgy chicken last week. Yeah. And lived to tell the tale. It's just off tinge.

Do you know what I mean? I wasn't pink anymore. Chris is one of the few people that ate out last night. He said delayed Father's Day dinner out. Wow. On a Monday. On a Monday. Yeah, Monday from the Sunday.

Rose. Nice. My daily free pub meal at work. I'm on day 100 of telling everyone that I'm having salad for dinner and then ordering a burger. Oh, she works at the pub. Oh, yeah. Okay. So she's open on a Monday. She's like, tonight I'm having the 100 of telling everyone that I'm having salad for dinner and then ordering a burger. Oh, she works at the pub. Oh, yeah, okay. So she's open on a Monday. She's like, tonight I'm having the salad.

Yeah. And then she gets there and she's like, let's go to the burger. Oh, just do a burger at Chip's. Yeah. Bloody burger. All you can eat Japanese on the menu for me tonight, says Anne. What? Yum.

Where? We watched Jiro Dreams of Sushi on Sunday night and then I ordered some Japanese food and I found... You watched what? Jiro Dreams of Sushi. What is that? What is that? Don't say that like it's one of the most well-known... It is. I watched Spiderman on Sunday night.

It's one of the best documentaries of all time. What is it called? Jiro Dreams of Sushi. It's about a master sushi maker in Japan. In Tokyo, Japan. Never heard of it in my life. You simply must watch it. It's always on the list of the greatest documentaries of all time. It's amazing.

It was done in 2011, I think. Follows the Sushi Master or as they become a Sushi Master. He's a three Michelin. No, no, no, no, no. He's like 90 by the time we meet him. Does he have a sushi train? No, he's got a three Michelin star restaurant. I don't think there's ever been a sushi train with a Michelin star.

Yeah, yeah, no. And it's the greatest sushi in the world. Wow. And then we ordered Japanese food to eat with it and I felt... He's dead. Well, yes. I'm just doing the basic maths. Although Japanese people do live a longer... He retired at 97. That's legendary. You must watch it. Okay. Sounds

good. This Hayley says, it was going to be a homemade quiche, but someone forgot the cooking time was 40 minutes and thought, effort, too late, fish and chips it is. Yeah, that's good stuff. Someone's messaging us from a cruise. Oh, lovely. Nikki said, I'm on a cruise.

It'll be a buffet for me. I want a buffet. Lovely buffet. Lovely. Hope it's got sneeze guards. That is... Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. A billionaire mining boss in Australia has gone viral for his comments.

He was speaking at, I don't know if it was a presentation. This was a presentation last week. So obviously it's a mining company, so they have like miners and stuff, but they also have like the office staff You know, employ like quite a few people He has already said that he's put a ban on working from home That's been in place for a while Doesn't want staff working at home

But now he doesn't Hard to mine when you're at home He doesn't want Well, like I said, they're in the office, Vaughn You smartass I just like to think someone's digging a hole in their backyard Haven't found any coal yet Keep it up with the boss I'll let you know, they're in the office, Vaughn, you smartass. I just like to think someone's digging a hole in their backyard. Haven't found any coal yet.

Keep it up with the boss. I'll let you know. And they're zooming in. They're like, I've done another shovel worth. No, he doesn't want his staff going out for a coffee. He doesn't want them popping out over the road to the cafe or to show sponsor Mick Cafe to grab a delicious coffee during work. Oh, ridiculous. What kind of an a-hole is this, eh?

Like, you can have a bloody coffee break. I think it was how he said it. This is what he said in his presentation. I want to hold them captive all day long. Oh, dearie me. I don't want them leaving the building. I don't want them walking down the road for a cup of coffee. We kind of figured out a few years ago how much that cost.

Oh, God. I want to hold him captive all day. It's wild. Isn't that a wild thing to say? What wild language. Is this how you become a billionaire? A billionaire miner. He sounds like a pig. He's giving me big pig vibes. This is a company worth

about $8 billion, employs like nearly 6,000 people. And they can't even have a cup of coffee. Well, I don't know. Maybe they have to have instant at the... But are they even allowed to go to the kitchen at work and make a coffee? The kitchenette and make one?

Or is there a coffee machine on premise? Oh, for God's sake. You've got to get out. You've got to get out and look around. Remember the coffee machine here? And it had the milk tube, and the milk tube would get green. And it had maggots. Remember, yeah, that was years ago.

Weevily maggots. Yeah, I haven't touched it since then. Oh, feral. Yeah. But I feel like if you go out, you stretch your legs 10 minutes, it's good. You get some fresh air, some sunshine. Oh, God, yeah.

Some natural light. I wonder what his stance is on cigarette breaks. Because that was always the thing when I entered the workforce. That's why I sort of took up smoking for a while was because the smokers got to have all these breaks. So I get my designated breaks and you're allowed to just pop out.

Or you announce the vapors that are allowed to go outside. I'll come out with you. It's so wild that you started smoking so you could get more breaks. It's so weird. What a stupid thing to do. But you think about it, it's double it's so much more of your life would be a break

because you're going to die earlier from the smoking but you get more breaks. Percentage wise, that's a double win. I don't think death is a break. You've died early. I wouldn't see my early death as a break. That moves closer. the death moves closer, and you're still taking more breaks because you're outside smoking.

So my whole life is a break. You're per capita. You're winning the breaks. I'm still not. You're getting more of your life rate going to be a break. No, but when you compare it to a non-smoker that dies at the same time, you've won. Yeah, yeah, totally.

Oh, wow. You did. You won because you got more breaks. I really won at life by becoming a smoker at 18. That's awesome. You've got to take the wins where you can get them, you know. Yeah, wow. You did. You won because you got more breaks. I really won at life. Yeah. Becoming a smoker at 18. That's awesome. You've got to take the wins where you can get them, you know. Yeah, exactly. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley.

Vaughan's in is a really good Instagram reel. A really good meme. It'll never ever be said on air. It's not appropriate for broadcast. It'll never be said on air, but oh my god, it's tickled me thoroughly. Now, when I was away last week, you silly beggars got involved in the Hawke's Bay Airport fire truck naming. And I tell

you what, we really swayed the vote. We really influenced that vote, didn't we? Spraying Mantis would have been my pick, but whatever. No, get on board. Be team... I'm team Judy Drench, obviously. Good. Thank you. But it has to be Dame Judy Drench. Yes, we said that. Yeah, we said that. But once it gets the name, then we'll assert that it needs to be Dame.

Dame Judy Drench. Because we've had quite sway. When we... Quite sway. Yeah. We've had quite sway because when we first talked about it, there was about 900 votes in total for the truck, and Fred was far ahead.

Yeah. Judy Drench was like third or maybe second. And Fred was far ahead. Yeah. Judy Drench was like third or maybe second. And now it's winning. Yeah, Judy Drench, I'm just looking at votes here. You've got more sway than Bikarunga. That's a terrible out-of-date joke. I actually think it's so, that's a great joke, but all my laughter went into the meme that you sent out.

It's been exhausted. It's been exhausted. It's been exhausted. Good joke though. And we kind of touched on this last week on what was it Wednesday or something and then we haven't

really talked about it since. The votes have gone up. Four and a half thousand votes in total. Yep. Two and a half of those are for Judy Drench sitting at 55% of the vote.

And it's a sexy fire truck too. Yeah. It's a sexy fire truck. And Judy Dench is a sexy woman. Those airport fire trucks are sexy fire trucks. This is what I said there.

It's sexier than the normal fire truck. Why is it sexy? And why is it? I don't know. It's what makes them sexy. Yeah. The flat,

the top mounted cannon. Yes. The fact that they shoot foam. Or is it because that we don't need in the cities they don't need top mounted cannon? But they should.

Imagine just pulling up on someone's front lawn and charging through their fence. Yeah, yeah. Straight up on the front lawn, hit the foam cannon. Like a what are those things? Battering ram. No, what's the vehicle? Tanks.

Like a tank. What are those things? Well, that's the other thing that makes these sexy is that they're not like the normal front end of a truck. Yeah, they're sexy. They've got like a full, almost 270 degree angle because it's all glass up there. Beautiful stuff.

Great stuff. I think we've really, this is the power of radio. It is. Yeah, well, keep your votes. We can't let it slip. Yeah, because it's still another couple of weeks of voting, right? September 13th, so we've got 10 days. 10 more days.

Well, you can go to the Hawke's Bay Airport website to vote. Name our fire truck. Yeah, and obviously put your vote behind Judy Drench. It's brilliant. It's brilliant. It's absolutely brilliant stuff. Now, it's also that time of the year. Bird of the year, baby.

Voting is underway today. Is it kicked off? Yep, I'm on the website now. Of course, following up from last year's absolute rampant from the poor ticker ticker that we hadn't even heard of. This is John Oliver, the talk show heist from America. He'll be getting back involved again this year. No, he needs to stay out of it.

It was a bit of fun, but it was too much. Literally just coming from the person that's trying to rig the votes for the firetruck. And get behind it. Yeah. Using our sway and our influence. I, you know, every year for me, I know it's one before. It's the kereru.

It is my favourite bird. We get a lot of them around us. Big fatties. You know, we're a body positive. It's 2024. It's time to be body positive and get a nice big fat bird in there. I love it. You'll be throwing your weight behind.

What's that? The kakapo. Yeah, that's the one. I met one last week and it was a full-blown emotional experience. But I will also say I'm still team Ruru. Moorpork. Big fan of the Moorpork boys, haven't you? Oh, yeah, they're cute.

They're cute. Remember the look of horror on that Doc Ranger's face when she said That the moor pork Eat the long tailed bat And I said Well that's life baby That's the circle of life Team moor pork Yeah She was very upset

She was upset We can't be angry At the moor pork That's nature That's nature And the moor pork And they've been here For the same amount of time

Yeah And they had a They're beautiful A relationship that worked With introduced species That are the problem I voted for the Ketadu right now.

Big fat fatty boom. So you just like click vote. How does this work? Does that read your IP or something? Birdoftheyear.org.nz and yeah,

you just click it. You don't have to log in or put your information or anything. What are we expecting for the controversy this year? Because every year, like there was a journal

of a thing last year. The year before was it Russian Bots? Yeah, Russian Bots. Then there was the bat, that one. The bat one. Oh yeah. The kakapo got stood down one year because it had won so many times. Yes, so it wasn't in contention.

Actually, I think a lot of these birds we could absolutely get rid of. The titiponamu. The seagulls. Beautiful. Those seagulls in there. It's like, yeah. And no one's voting for that. Look at that grey duck. We're all good, thanks.

Do you know what I mean? What do you mean grey duck? But it's rare. It's our duck. I love all these birds. I love them all. Oh, yeah. If we're getting rid of anything, it's the cats.

Excuse me? Get rid of the cats. I beg your pardon? If I was in government right now and say, you can have the cat you've got, but no more cats. When that cat dies, there's no more cats. You'd like getting votes. Yeah.

I'm not voting for him. We're going to look back in 50 years and be like, he was ahead of his time. Shut up, Gareth Morgan. Me and Gareth Morgan. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. She's vying for a jingle, which means it's an official segment, but she needs five stars max for Shannon's hacks.

Yeah, we said we'd make this segment permanent. We'd make an intro if she can deliver us a good hack. A five-star hack. So far. Time is running out. Not so good. Yeah, time is running out. What's this, our seventh time, eighth time?

Yeah, we've thrown you a bone. Yeah. And we gave you a break for a while to really sort of ruminate, think on something. You came in this morning and you said, guys, I've got a great hack. Yeah. That's timely. Yeah, we're heading into spring,

whether you believe in the equinox or not, whatever that is. I don't know if it's something. To those that celebrate the equinox. Is it something that you can believe in? It's just a thing, isn't it? Yeah, it's unilaterally decided. No, I think people say there is the calendar spring, which some people say the 1st of September, right?

And then there is actual equinox spring. Yeah, where the season changes. In a few weeks? Yeah. Either way, spring cleaning season. We need a declutter. We need to look at the wardrobe. We need to figure out what we're doing.

Yeah. Right? My house is very dusty. I've got a hack for you. Okay. So Marie Kondo was super famous for doing the does this spark joy? Yes.

You pick up an item, you look at it and say, does this spark joy? For me, that's a little confusing. Like, does this cup spark joy? Well, no, but it's a cup. You know what I mean? Yeah. So I've got a new way to decide if you should keep something in your spring cleaning.

Okay. So you pick up your item and you say if this had human shit on it, would I clean it off or would I throw it out? If this had feces, would you go to the... I sort of get this

because sometimes, you know, if something's really dirty, really stuffed up, you're like, put it in the bin. But we live in wasteful times, we shouldn't be throwing things out. Yeah, donate to it. If this had human shit on it, would I wipe it off and keep it? Would I go to the effort of sanitising, cleaning it, figuring

out how to make it work, or would I just say, I'll donate this one? You can't donate human shit. No, you're not actually shitting on something. It's the idea of it. You pick it up and you imagine, if this had human faces on it, would I keep it? Could we run through an example?

You said you've got... I'll get out my handbag. Okay. Yeah. There's a lot of crap. Is there a lot of crap in there? Yeah, yeah. Okay. Here's a lot of crap. Is there a lot of crap in there? Yeah, yeah. Okay. Here's a pair of spare undies. Okay,

what if they had human shit? Well, they probably have had it at some stage, haven't they? They could have had human shit in them. Okay. Size 12. I mean, that's a while ago. These no longer spark joy. And they're covered in human shit, so I'm going to get rid of them.

There's a jewellery box. I've got two of them. Yeah, and see, like, how much work would that be to clean? Too much. This is covered in human feces. What a bizarre way of looking at things. Yeah, it's really strange to imagine it. And it also makes me feel a bit sick. Yeah. No, I'd get rid of that. I'd donate that.

Some things, if they had human shit on them, would be quite porous and it might, like, forever smell. See, now here's a leather tassel that's come off my key ring. Looks like a fishing lure. Yeah, or a flog. Yeah. If this had human shite on it, it would all get in the strands and I would almost say it's a too hard basket.

Yeah. And you don't need, like, what is that that's not attached to anything? What helps me find it? It helps me find my keys in my handbag. But they're not attached to your keys currently. Yeah, okay. So the shit rule applies here. Okay.

The shit rule. I've got a highlighter. Yeah. That probably if it was covered in literal human. You wouldn't bother, would you? I wouldn't bother. What about imagining things in your house, like spring cleaning? But they would also wipe clean very easily. That highlighter.

Yeah, it would. Also then the leather tassels. You'd be good to go. Instead of the handbag, what about you cleaning your house or your garage? It's hard with clothes as well because I suppose you could just put them in the wash in the hopes that the human feces would come out of them quite easily.

Now whose feces is it? My feces? Yeah, because you've got more tolerance for yours. I have tolerance for my own feces. But as strangers... Was it thrown at me by... I think depending on how much you need to declutter, you can choose

your level of feces, maybe. Right, so there's not much it's your feces, but if you've got a lot to declutter, you've got to imagine how someone else's faeces. This is a hack to change your state of mind to help you declutter.

But see, okay, so we need new plates. That's established on the show. It's a long-running show here. You've still got the chip plates. You've still got the chip plates. So embarrassing. But if there was a bit

of human poo on them, I'd give it a rinse and chuck on the dishwasher. No, but you'd always know that there'd been human feces on it. That stuff doesn't work. And the chip is porous. You're not decluttering your plates because you need them.

You're using them because you don't have any more. You haven't replaced them. I don't even think that would force my hand to buy new plates. Okay, right. Just wash them. You really should. All chipped. Yeah.

And some of your mugs and glassware also chipped. Yeah. I'm just saying. How rough are you with your plates? So rough. So rough. I think you've got a turbulent dishwasher. They're fickle. They might have added some jingling jangling in there at some stage. I think so, considering literally everything in your

house is chipped. Okay. This, to me, is... I think it's not a bad way of decluttering. I think it's not a bad way of decluttering It's probably your best hack I'd say 3 out of 5 I'm giving it a 3 out of 5 Yes! I love that

I was expecting you guys to really give it a 2 for a pun Because I always struggle when you're like I'll get rid of that and then you're like well actually maybe I was too hasty You are a hoarder You love hoarding stuff. I love stuff. Yeah.

I love things. Yeah. I'm a collector of things. Trinkets and stuff. Trinkets. Well, I've got to start imagining my trinkets laden with human feces. How would you clean it out of a taxidermied duck? Yeah, see, that's hard.

Dishwasher. No, you've got to be very gentle with them. Can you not put a taxidermy duck in a dishwasher? Well, I haven't actually tried. I do have a taxidermy duck. Rachel. We have a taxidermy duck called Rachel. Of course you do.

It's a boy. Yeah. And Rachel, I would never put Rachel in the dishwasher. No, no, no, no. You'd have to comb him and softly wipe a light wipe I think it's called preening when it's feathers yeah is it

yeah rather than brushing you preen the feathers I have to preen the feathers give them a light wipe but yeah I do it but you know the old saying shit off a duck's back so

pretty much shit off a duck's we're in Derbyshire in the UK. The Bull's Head is the name of the pub that has been closed after inspectors found multiple food hygiene problems, including one particular food handler who has been told now, don't scratch your bottom, was seen repeatedly scratching his bottom and then handling food.

Also, if you know the council food investigators are in your kitchen. Hands off the tush. Like, you don't scratch your ass, right? Yeah. So, scratched his backside through his shorts several times, touched his face and dirty equipment, but failed to wash his hands after touching all of these things. And then would touch food, could lead to of course contamination of

said food. So I think that's a rule now. As food handlers, we don't scratch our bottoms and then touch the food. What if you got it to your butt? Yeah. Scratch it and wash your hands. Or back up to a tree like a bear.

Yes. Use a surface. Maybe there up to a tree like a bear. Yes. Use a surface. Yeah. Maybe there needs to be a special pole outside. You know like those bristle brushes that you clean boots with? Yeah. One of those standing up. Stop the cold, you die back and it's your bum.

In the kitchen. Yeah, in the kitchen. Back up to that. Well, this is why it's kind of gone viral because, yeah, they're like the pub had to bring in a rule, no scratching your bottom. Yeah. No scratching your bottom, please, while you're doing this.

But, I mean, there was also a lot. There was prawns being left to defrost in a sink drainer. Several food items passed. They're used by date, mouldy, not washing hands, da-da-da-da-da. A woman washed her hands but then wiped them on her dress. Little things. Okay. Raw meat being stored on top of salad and it leaking through.

Yeah, yeah, no. You don't want to know how the sausage is made. I don't like when you can see a kitchen. I like to just, the kitchen's out the back. No, unless it's bouge, like high end, you know, chef's table. We're sitting at the chef's table. That's nice. And we're watching you cook because you've got

exquisite health standards there. Well, I think we've actually done this maybe over a year ago, and it was really gross, and I don't know why we're back here. But we want to know the grossest thing that you have seen at a food place. I love this. It's great. We've all seen something grim.

There was my favourite restaurant in Wellington that was taking the leftover curry and they were pouring it back into the vat and serving it up to the next customer. Is that bad? I don't really care. It's literally overcurried. Wait, from their plate? Yeah, so say you got a bowl of, let's say, beautiful chanae. No, I thought you meant it was in like a serving container,

like a smorgasbord buffet. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, no, that's bad. You would order a bowl of chicken curry or whatever, and then they were caught clearing your bowl if you hadn't finished it, slurping your uneaten curry back into the van and serving it back. Do you know what? That place is still up and running and good on them.

It's delicious. Every time I go to Wellington, I'm like, maybe I'll just try and go down here and have a little curry because it is really yum. I'm hoping they don't do that after they got caught. I'm sure they don't. That's wild. Anyway, that is what we want to know today.

What is the grossest thing that you have seen at a food place? Maybe it was when you were working behind the scenes in the kitchen at a food place. Maybe something you saw. We can leave names out. We can leave names of businesses out. We're not here to end businesses. We're just here to share gross stories. And as you say, maybe you were a customer or maybe you worked there and you have something behind the scenes.

I feel like if I was running a food place and a steak went on the floor, I'd just quickly put it up and fry it a bit more. You don't want me to fry the bugs away. I eat food off my foot all the time. Yes, I mean, but it's different when you're eating it. When you chop vegetables and it goes on the ground. Yeah, yeah.

Chuck it back in. Chuck it back in. Chuck it in the stir fry. The stir fry will take care of the bugs. The stir fry. The stir fry will take care of the bugs. Stir fry it away. It's fine. But then it's okay when you're cooking and you're eating. But when it's a stranger, I don't know if you should be doing that.

Oh, I'm like that. Who was I talking to? Oh, if I find a hair in my food, sometimes I'll just pull it out and keep going. Yeah, I'm the same. I'm not going to make a fuss about it. That could have joined the food at any stage. Unless it's a pubic looking here. Because it could be beard, but it could be pub.

Yeah. Yeah. That's when I'll say no. I'll eat around that if it was a pube. Right, so you just won't eat. So you'll make an island in the food. Pube island. A pube island.

And then eat around that. And around the pubes. That's fine. I'll do that too. Okay, give us a call. I'll 800- So you're going on record saying you'll eat around the pubes too. I'll And around the pubes. That's fine, I'll do that too. Okay, give us a call, 0800-DARLSATEM. So you're going on record saying you eat around the pubes too? I'll eat around the pubes. You eat around the pubes?

Always. Bored Alan Smith. You're just going to make a pube island? We want you to give us a call, 0800-DARLSATEM. You can text in anonymously as well, 9696. Tell us the grossest thing that you have seen at a food platter. A pub in the UK has gone viral because the food inspectors were there and they caught

many violations including one staff member that constantly itched his bottom. Itched his bottom and then touched the food. So we want to know the worst,

the grossest thing you've seen at a place of food and we have many, many messages. Wow. The texts are coming in thick and fast.

Thick, fast and grotty. Yeah. Real grotty. I do love them though. Like it's gross but I love these stories. Yeah. Korea hospital person here worked at an international chain hotel in the UK. Head chef was an alcoholic. Saw his sweat dripping onto the food

and into the sauces. It's just a bit of vodka pasta, you know. Big fat yuck. It's a hot place, the kitchen. I've wondered what you do when it starts getting sweaty. You've got to have a towel. You've got to have a sweat towel. You see it on MasterChef when they're running around and stuff.

Yeah, sweat band. I guess it adds a bit of salt, doesn't it? Yeah, no, a bit of sodium. Stephanie, you worked in hospo. Obviously, no names of places. We don't want to end businesses. No, that's my thing. What did you see?

Well, for years I used to work in a hospital, like I said, and I used to take trays of food around the canopies at the parties and stuff. And for a long time they had all those skewers. And so you'd have a bowl that had a used, so they could put their used skewer in it. But they never did. So they'd take the put their used skewer in it, but they never did. So they'd take the food off the skewer, and then they'd place it on top of other food. So they'd run their mouth along the skewer, and then they'd just kind of place the used skewer

with rubbish on it and then place it on top. And I used to have a line, I'd say, Mmm, that'll be really good for the next person. Oh, used skewers. Yuck. Oh, you're yuck. Yeah, that's y really good for the next person. Oh, used skewers. Yuck. Oh, you're yuck. Yeah, that's yuck. Not good for sure.

Get some new skewers. I mean, how much were we talking about? What do they cost? A couple of cents each, right? Hamish, what did you see in Hospo? So I was working in a ceiling as a sparky, and I managed to find a whole family of pigeons in the ceiling. And it was disgusting.

It was just poop everywhere. And I asked the owners, I said, yeah, they knew about it. I said, okay, that's a bit strange, but yeah. What they knew? They were using the pigeons a lot, they were doing. This restaurant knew it had pigeons living in the ceiling? Yeah. It's like, you could hear a rustling sound on the roof.

I didn't know until I got into the ceiling. I was like, oh, okay. Yeah, there would have been some pigeon poo. Yeah. Sprinkled around there. That was a massive pigeon poo. Yeah, there's good sound all the time. Yeah.

Oh, Hamish. Yeah, thank you. Let's go to Jared. Jared, what did you, the grossest thing you saw at a food place? This would have been about probably 10 years ago. I was doing some work outside a bakery out the back, and they had just finished cooking off some mints, which I'm assuming would be put into their pies.

Yep. Love mints. It was sitting outside uncovered with a whole heap of flies flying around it. Outside? Yeah, it was just outside the main kitchen. Ooh, yuck! Yuck! Ooh, mincey.

Ooh, mincey, and it would have gone all brown without being cooked. That's yuck. Oh, yuck. Yeah, fair enough, actually. Jared, thank you. Some messages in. The grossest thing you've seen at a food place. I used to work somewhere where a French waiter

who would take his shoes off and sniff his feet before running food out to people. Sorry, say again? Sorry, what? They worked at a restaurant where the French waiter would take his shoes off and sniff his feet before running. Do you think he was checking if,

have I got smelly feet? Yeah, maybe. But they said it was like really gross seeing the guy that was about to handle food giving his... Pick up his little foot and give it a sniff. Yeah, people smelling

their own feet. Gross. I got a burger once and when I opened the box it had a bite out of it. Hey! How did this happen? Sometimes you're hungry,

you know. I used to work in a fresh fish and chip shop. When the shop closed we'd have to take the fish from the shop cabinet to the chiller and we'd have

slap flights with flounders. Just grab them by the tail. We'd have what? Slap flights. I'd slap each other around the face with flounders. Like a slip. And then we'd put them back in the chiller for sale the next day. A flat fish slap.

It has some real sting to it. You know flat flounders? I love a flounder, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Smoking them on the face of them is weird though. Oh, I got someone was like I was trying to avoid the carbs

I got a lettuce wrapped burger I bit into it and I was like that's weird and I looked down and it had a centipede in it Yuck Big centipede too

I actually haven't eaten one so Yeah you don't know I can't say that it's yuck You don't know I actually don't know You, so. Yeah, you don't know. I can't say that it's yuck. You don't know. Yeah, I actually don't know. You've got no idea. My husband had a blowfly in his takeaway rice bowl.

One of those big, blue, shiny, mega blowflies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mega, mega shiny blowfly. Yeah, he said that was a little bit crispy. Clearly had enjoyed a swirl or two around the wok before. I was going to say, had it been cooked? Yeah.

Okay, well, that's extra protein for free. Oh yeah, for sure. You always see, this is at the low end of things, you always see a New Zealand waitstaff serving drinks and glasses and handing it to you,

holding the top of the glass where your mouth's going to go. Yeah, like that. Yes. Hold by the stem. Instead of holding it around the base. Oh yeah, gross.

I hate when people do that, yeah, because you're literally going to drink, unless it's a straw. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I worked for a big catering company once and someone was like, hey, we're missing a dishcloth.

And we searched everywhere and couldn't find it. We then heard from a client that they cut into their fish pie and the dishcloth was in the middle of that. One of those blue ones, those chucks. Oh, yes. Yes, 100% the disposable ones in the kitchen. Yeah. I went into the local bakery, and as I walked in,

the person was mopping, like they had been mopping the floors, but they were giving the tables a once-over with a mop. Yuck. Come on. No. Come on. I ordered a bacon and egg sammy from, I'm not going to say where from,

a guy gave it, the guy that gave it to me, it had a big black hair in it. I quietly mentioned it to him because I don't want to make a big deal. He pulled out the black hair and then said, what hair? Oh, my gosh. Just denied it ever happened. I mean, we would eat it. Yeah. Create a hair island.

Create a hair island. Yeah, a pub island. I used to work in a food court. There was one place in the food court that didn't open until 2pm. Yeah. But their chicken delivery happened at 6am and that chicken just sat there non-chilled out in the open until they arrived just before 2.

That's not good. Someone messaged saying they know a fish and chip shop that used to defrost the fish outside in the sun on top of the rubbish bins. Get it done. I used to work at a high-end cake shop. If the cake got mould, we'd scrape it off and re-ice it. And if the cake was a week old and still hadn't been sold, we'd rename it as dense cake because

it started going a bit stale. Because it's thick. Because it's a thick, stale old cake. Oh, yeah, nice dense cake. Yep. There's so many that are a real yuck. I mean, if this didn't make you just want to cook your own meal at home tonight, I don't know what else we can do to help you.

We're trying to inspire. Play ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. So taking a long weekend in November, I could probably just sit at home and play PlayStation, to be totally honest with you. Yeah, right. That sounds like a glorious way to spend a long weekend. Yeah, beautiful.

Hopefully also the weather's turning, so it's a bit more happy about the outdoor life. Do you want to hang out with me? No, it's all right. Stop talking. Because Vaughn knows how that'll go. It'll just end up with Vaughn's wife very hungover with you the next day.

Yeah, exactly. So you're doing the heafy? Yes, which is like a four-day hike. Three nights, four days. Fun. I'm so excited about it. Is it one of the great walks? One of the great walks.

Gorgeous. Gorgeous. I'm excited. Yeah. So I last week got a taste of nature when I went to Anchor Island and hung out with the kakapo. And so I was like, it's going to be nice weather. You're doing the hefe.

I'm fresh off that. Feeling good. I've proposed to the family that we do an overnight hut. With the girls. With the girls and Sade. Who has stayed in the dock hut. Yeah, we did. We've done a couple of huts.

She stayed in the dock hut. Although the second night we did just walk straight out and go to a hotel. She was so stoked when we were like, oh, this one's pretty full. Should we just hammer it and get out in the dark and stay at a hotel and her eyes lit up? Because the hut didn't have bookings. So they ended up being this like 20 hut bunk

with like 40 people in it. So we just hooked it and got out of there. That's the thing. If we were going to do it, we'd go to a hut that's booking. Yep.

To confirm. I know you don't want to spend all day hiking, but I don't feel like your family's not a hiking family Well we've never hiked We've got Whingy The whingy kids They'll be whinging

But you've got to How do you stop a kid being a whingy kid You've got to just get them Smack them Smack them Well unfortunately You can't do that anymore They'll poo poo that

As a way to stop a whingy kid whinging I'll give you something to whinge about Pinch from the soft soft underside of your arm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A little bit of silent torture. Did Patsy love a soft... Pinched on the soft bit. Oh, you're hurting me.

No, I'm not. Not yet, I'm not. Yeah, you don't even know pain. That's a sort of thing. So then I've got a favourite heart, Crosby's heart, on the Coromandel. It's so lovely.

That's a hard walk to get to, though. It's a hard walk. It's a hard walk. It's not an easy That's a hard walk to get to, though. It's a hard walk. It's not an easy walk. But I also said I'll carry everything. Yeah. Well, travel light. Obviously, they'll have backpacks and stuff,

but I'll carry all the heavy stuff. But it's one of those things I know has a 90% chance of going bad and everyone's angry and everybody's tired and shitty at each other. Yeah. But also, I think as a dad, you've got a responsibility to put everybody in that situation so you can just throw your hands up. Oh. Gotta try. Yeah, right.

How many dads? Is this a move? It's a move. You're doing a move. Yeah, it's kind of like a move. It's a life lesson, but it's also a, well, I've tried. So then I don't have to try. Because my trying, last time I tried.

So you're going to sit around and they'll be like I'm bored you'll be like I suggested something for us to do and you said no yeah

because how long are you going to stay in this hunt for just one night don't know two nights two nights wait so they've said yes

no no they haven't said yes no you haven't it's a convincing no I've proposed it how did it go down not great okay

because yeah I suggested that one and I have, Crosby's and I have previously talked about how it is a challenging hike. Yeah, it's a start. And so there was even like, oh, maybe not for the first one. Maybe we can find an easier one to get to. Well, you'd go to the Pinnacles. No, too many people.

Like a hut that's easy, easy to get to. Well, you just do a day hike nearby and don't stay. There's got to be a stay. Why don't you just do a top ten holiday park like every other family? Well, that's actually what producer Shannon messaged saying that most girls their age want to go to the top ten holiday park and hook up with boys like all good preteens did. But I just want to go play on the trampoline. In the middle of nowhere.

Was this your... 100. Oh, yeah, sneak out. I'll head off to the jumping pillow. It's a good time. This is why we're going to a drop line in the middle of nowhere. Was this your 100? Oh, yeah, sneak out. I'll head off to the jumping pillow. It's a good time. Smooching on the jumping pillow. It's the jumping pillow, not the smooching pillow. It's the smooching pillow.

But we would argue more setting up a tent than we would on a high- I didn't tent. No, no, no. We're in the cabin. You get cabins. How embarrassing. We're on a tent. Excuse me. No, no, no. We're in the cabin. You get cabins. How embarrassing, Dad. Cabins. We're on a tent. Excuse me.

Oh, gosh. We've got a lovely tent, and it's easy to set up. What's the Wi-Fi? If you follow my instructions. What's the Wi-Fi code? There's no Wi-Fi. It might just be better to stay at home, I think. I think just stay at home.

Just stay at home. Why don't you go for a solo hike? You've done that before. I could do that. That's nice. Yeah. Never come back. Charlie's dad took after the girls.

You know, I could follow in the footsteps of my good friend um, what was his name? Phillip or Tom that took his kids into the bush and never came out. He must be going through it, eh? Every day. Dad, we just want to play Roblox with our friends. What's the wife? Where's the wife? We want to watch YouTube.

I want to meet some boys. I haven't seen a Mr. Beast video for two years. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. He set a scene for you. Friday, lunchtime. These two roll sham bowled me into going to this restaurant that they wanted to go to. There was no thought about trying something new.

We go quarterly because we love the cauliflower popcorn. Yeah, it's delicious. Nice, but there's so many other restaurants you guys should try. No, we don't need to. Why would you? I've been telling you about the Jamaican place. Oh, yeah, we want to try that. That's on my list.

But we had to stay in town. We had to stay sort of local, so we went there. It was delicious. It was good, but it was like... It was really good. Just won awards for it, of course it's good. Afterwards, we had some time to kill, so we were going to go back to Fletcher's

and Fletcher's said there's no snacks, so we're just eating. I don't know why we needed snacks. Snacks were also for later. It was for later, yeah. So we went to a supermarket. Yes. Now leaving that supermarket, we all spied. Where I got a stamp. I made sure that I paid for

everyone's snacks. So you get the stamp. This is how bad Hayley wants the collectibles. The stamps. Is that you were like, I'll pay for the chips. I was like gathering everyone's stuff. Yeah. I'll pay for it all, I'll pay for it all. And I got one sticker. It would be really funny if the New World PR team was listening

and they sent Fletch and I full sets. Yeah. And not Hayley. Yeah. That would be funny. That would actually be hilarious. That would be funny. She's shaking her head.

I would call it workplace bullying. She doesn't know who you are. I reckon I do. I think I've got some stamps for you though. Weird. Don't make me pay for them Shannon just messaged me now Saying $30 Take it or leave it

No Or leave it I'm not doing it Do you know So many more people on Trade Me now Are selling them Even more I know

Because it's getting near the end And people are getting desperate So we're walking out of this supermarket We simply won't say which one And But I got a sticker And we said you will just before. And there was a baby in a pram and the baby was wearing sunglasses.

And not like baby ones. No, like speed dealer sunglasses. The baby looked awesome. It looked rocking, man. And it was a rocking baby. And even Fletch, who famously does not like babies. I see. Cool baby.

That's a cool baby. That's a cool baby. That's a cool baby. And I was like, cool baby. And I couldn't tell if the baby was looking at me, but I like to imagine the baby, which was literally a baby baby, not like a toddler, like a baby baby. No, no, no, baby. The baby baby may have even been asleep,

but in my mind the baby behind the sunglasses winked. Yeah. I know I'm things. I feel like he kind of pulled them down and said, thanks, guys. Yeah, yeah. You know, like that. Have a rockin' day.. You know, like that. Cheer my dudes. Have a rockin' day.

Have a rad, radical day. Yeah, get out there and live your best life. Yeah, rock the free world. And so the baby was wearing sunglasses, and we said, man, that's cool. That's a baby wearing sunglasses. Cool baby. And when we were past, we said, cool baby to the lady. And then we kind of did that thing where just as you pass, you catch, and we took three, and we took three more steps and I said to Fletch,

that was Sophie Pascoe. Dame. Dame. Dame Sophie Pascoe. I didn't say Dame. Now, should I have? In a casual setting, you should have. So disrespectful.

Always say Dame. Always Dame. That's why the fire truck should be called Dame Judy Dredge. We will ensure that that happens. Yeah. And I said, that's Sophie Pascoe. Again, my bad for not saying Dame. Yep.

Verbatim, you said just Sophie. Yeah. That's Sophie Pascoe. And Fletch turned and he's like, no, it's not. I said, I'm going to go back and say hello. Because we've met her before. Yeah. We were out in Christchurch once and she was there and I put her medal on.

Yeah. Crazy. And we met her. She was on Have You Been Paying Attention? We've met multiple times. We've interviewed her on the radio. I was like, I'm going to go back and say hello. And we met her She was on Have you been paying attention Multiple times We've interviewed her on the radio I was like I want to go back and say hello

And Fletcher's like That's not That's not That's not her No Also I don't really know What she looks like When she's not in the swimming pool

So I was like I don't know But she's got a lot of hair there Yeah You can normally see her With a swimming cap And the goggles

Yeah And in the goggles. Yeah. And in the training suit. Yeah. Look more eel-like. Yeah. If you could reduce all friction on your body. Yeah. So we kept walking.

I'm sure it was. And then I dropped it. Yep. We didn't have time. We had things to do. Last night, I was watching the Paralympics coverage on Television One. They do this every night after 7 sharp. It's great.

All the Paralympic events. I just saw They do this every night after seven sharp. It's great. All the Paralympic events. I just saw an article on her. There's a cool baby. That's the cool baby. There's a cool baby. So I saw it and I was like, God damn it, it was. And so I went on her Instagram

and the baby's face was covered, but I got the vibe. It was cool. That that was the cool baby with the sunglasses. And I messaged her and I said, did we fully ignore you While complimenting your baby On the cool sunglasses at the supermarket the other day

And she said yeah that was weird You guys just walked past in a flurry We were in a rush I'm so sorry I knew it was you and Fletch wouldn't let me come back And say hello I didn't think it was her She made Fletch look like the dum dum She said people do often not recognise me without the swim cap and the goggles

See I told you Well now she needs do often not recognise me without the swim cap and the goggles. Yeah, see, see, I told you. Well, now she needs to walk around her life in a swim cap and goggles. Just to go to the supermarket. Just so we can be like, oh my God, it's Dame. And the baby needs a sign that says, this cool baby belongs to Dame Sophie Pascoe. This cool mum. Yeah. Dame Sophie Pascoe.

Cool sunglasses though. Oh, how rude of us. I feel really bad about that. Yeah, did you apologise? She's a Dame and the baby took all of it. And we ignored her. I did, I did. I apologise.

I said I'm really sorry about that. Sorry about that indeed. And cool baby. Cool baby. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM. We went out for dinner the other day, me and Aaron,

who have known each other for nearly 14 years. Wow. And we used to do this thing, we haven't done it in a while, where I would be like, tell me something I don't know about you. And the longer we would, I know, intolerable. I just, can you imagine how arduous it is to be with me? I have no comment on the matter. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Vaughn is just ignoring this conversation. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just thinking about that cool baby in sunglasses. That's a cool baby. What would he make of this situation? What would he do? He'd be like, that's so uncool, Hayley. Anyway, so I used to do it all the time.

I hadn't done it for a while. We sat there in, you know, 14-year silence. Yeah. And I went... Celebrating monogamy. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's so fun. Anyway, and I said, okay

tell me something I don't know about you. And he racked his brain for a bit. He was like, I can't think of anything. I said, tell me something I don't know about you and I'll take my lead from that. So I was thinking and I was like, I don't think I ever told Aaron about the first boy I ever pashed. Not kissed. Right.

But like. Pashed. Okay, yeah. And it's not a great story. He had a tongue ring. His name was Menz with a Z. What was that short for? No idea.

Pat Menzies Footwear. Yeah, yeah. We must be part of the Pat Menzies family. Menzies. Menz. Was it short? Menendez We must be part of the Menzies family. Menzies? Menz? Was it short? Menendez? That's the last name.

That's the last name, Menendez. He was slightly older. And we met him while we were sort of out about in town. In Wellington. In Wellington. Goth days? Yeah, cusp goth. I was about 14, I think.

13, 14. Anyway, so we'd been out and we met these boys sort of on the street. And they came back to my friend's house, which is so, so, so obscure. And there was a hot one and then there was men's. And I made out with him and his tongue ring on the leather couch in my friend Maria's kitchen. Okay.

A leather couch in a kitchen? Yeah. With a man called men's? Wellington. Yeah. Wild, wild. And I told him this story and he was really horrified. Aaron was. Yeah, yeah. Aaron was like oh yuck. I said yeah, I remember his tongue ring rattling around, you know, and me being like, oh, what a sort of odd sensation.

And then Aaron just paused and he goes, man, you hooked up with some drop kicks. And I thought he was referring in a jokey way to himself, like, ha, ha. You know, men's and me. Ha, ha, ha. Me and men's. And then he said, what about? He reminded me of something that I had forgotten.

So in a way, telling me something I don't know about him because I'd forgotten. That when I met Aaron, before we got together, I was hooking up with someone. We weren't together, but we were hanging out who went on to steal from Aaron and he was like remember that guy insert name here and I was like yeah and he was like and how you were like hanging out with him when I met you and then he went on to steal things I was like what did he steal And he ended up stealing like a whole bunch of like wood and supplies and stuff from Aaron. And I was like, is this the picture you have of me that I hook up with these losers like men and a thief?

He was like, yeah, kind of. And I had to rack my brains and I was like, well, I guess I have. I have been with a few dropkicks. Anyway, he was really judgmental of his first hookup. And I said, well, who was yours? And he said, it was this beautiful girl. And I knew her family and I knew them very well. And it was a really nice time. Wholesome. I was really wholesome. Yeah, right.

I feel past shamed. We all had bad firsts. You got past shamed. You got past shamed. And there were, you know, poor men's. Wait, so you're having a lovely, nice dinner. Yeah. And then all of a sudden you've turned it into this.

Yeah, this sort of revealing what it says about me, or what it says about who I was at the time, shall we say, between the ages of 13 and 21. You've shown growth. I have shown growth. Shown growth. Anyway, you can't pass shapes on that. We all want to know, Texter875,

we all want to know what men's is up to now. What is men's up to now? I mean, imagine he'd be a bit older than me now. Yeah. And he was blonde, not particularly tall, tongue ring. I feel like... Let's find him. Let's leave the guy alone.

Let's find him. I think you've already said enough. His name is a name I've never heard before. I don't think it's... I don't think it was his name. He was bashing under an alias. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Right now, time for...

Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. I wondered why that was... It didn't sound right, eh? Turn your microphone on. I actually think it might be Fletch because before I had to turn my own microphone on. I think so too because I didn't touch that. It was like this.

And I had to go like that. Feel free to operate your own microphone at your will. Well, that's actually your job because you've got the buttons there. Are you offloading some of your responsibilities onto fellow employees? I don't want that. Write that down. Write that down. Write that down.

We're here to bring the sex and the vibe to the show. I'm a vibe hire. And I bring the sex. You can't the show. I'm a vibe hire. And I bring the sex. You can't be blamed for anything. Hands off. Hands off. If the vibe's right, I'm doing my job.

I don't know. It feels pretty good. Yeah. Vibe feels pretty good. It's a Paralympics themed fact of the week, this week, day,

week, month, year. No further comment, Your Honour. No further comment, Your Honour. So I found this a fascinating story. A-hmm. No further comment, Your Honour. No further comment, Your Honour. So I found this a fascinating story.

A fascinating story. The Paralympics. People who compete may have sustained a life-altering injury. Perhaps they were born differently abled. This is a story about Oksana Masters, who was born in 1989. That's the year I was born. And Taylor Swift.

In the Ukraine. Yeah. Three years after the Ukraine. Don't say the. I do apologize. It's not the Hawke's Bay. And it's not the Vaughan Smith. The Ukraine.

It is the Vaughan Smith. It's not the New Zealand. That's actually why I prefer to be addressed every time. Fletch the Vaughan and Hayley. Fletch the Vaughan. The definitive Vaughan's word. It's not the New Zealand. That's actually why I prefer to be addressed every time. Fletch the Vaughan and Hayley. Fletch the Vaughan. The Vaughan, the definitive Vaughan. Could it be a Fletch, a Vaughan and some Hayley? Some Hayley, yeah.

She was born in Ukraine in 1989, three years after the Chernobyl nuclear disaster. Oh, yeah. Well, that caused a lot of birth defects, didn't it? She was born with severe physical defects. Okay. Because of the exposure to the radiation, including six toes, webbed fingers, no thumbs,

one leg 15 centimetres shorter than the other, missing some organs. Oh, God. What? As well as... Wait, I've been to Chernobyl. Is this going to start? Am I going to grow some extra...

Check your organs. Do a count on your organs. I'm going to start... Am I going to grow... I'd check your organs. Do a count on your organs. I'm going to start growing an extra couple of toes. Yeah, maybe. No, she was born there. She was in utero. Her mother... Was in the zone.

Was in the zone. Right. And she was conceived, and it affected the fetus. She was born. These were some of her birth defects. Right. You think, what a disadvantaged start to life.

She won a gold medal at the Paralympics for cross-country skiing. Far out. What have you done? I've won lots of gold medals, but not Olympics. Yeah, I know, but not in a Chernobyl. Taylor Swift, sell out tours. This woman, all these disadvantages, gold medal at the Paralympics. Hayley Sproul.

TBC. Hayley Sproul. TBC. Win. My life is still just developing. I'm still extremely young. I'm still on this side of 30. Are you going to win anything?

Like you were nominated. I've won a lot. Okay. I've won a lot. Marching doesn't count though. Marching isn't a sport. Why not? What have you done?

Okay, calm down. Jeez. Wow. Really the nerve there. Calm down, sweetheart. Give us a smile. Oh, God, enough of that. Enough of that.

Thanks. So she won, two of the five medals she won in 2018 were gold and went on to compete at the Paralympics in Tokyo as well, even though they happened after. Remember? Because of the pandemic. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pandemic.

So she was raised in the U.S. and that's who she competes for because she was adopted by a woman from the U.S. This was a big situation in the early and that's who she competes for because she was adopted by a woman from the US this was a big situation in the early 90s that yeah a lot of babies were adopted from that area to the US so yeah she said she was missing weight bearing bones in her legs

her knees were described as floating they weren't really supported by anything hands are wet, five fingers, no thumbs don't have a right bicep, I'm missing some organs I have one kidney I don't have a right bicep. I'm missing some organs. I have one kidney. I don't have any enamel on my teeth. Like, all of the, can you imagine? All of this

is doubt to her. Yeah. And she said the woman that raised her was the number one inspiration in her life to you know, not let these things hold her back. So what was it, cross-country skiing? Yes. So did they, how did she adapt the skis?

I don't, I don't know. I don't know the adaptions or even what, because you know the different, I always think they were the Paralympics, the classes, the classes of the Paralympics. Yeah, like F20 and C something or other all stands for the different abilities. Yeah, the different stuff. Far out.

I'll tell you what. The Olympics is cool. You watch it. But the Paralympics is inspiring. I know. No end. It does make you think, what have I done? Yeah.

Sometimes I'll get to the gym and I'll just be like, not today. Not today. No reason why. And you've got all your arms and legs. I've got everything. I've got a slight tinge in the knee. Too much for me to overcome. Yeah. Actually. No reason why. And you've got all your arms and legs. I've got everything. I've got a slight tinge in the knee. Too much for me to overcome, actually, to get stronger. That's enough for me to not do it today.

Better go home. Yeah, better go home, actually. You'll just lay down and keel over. Yeah, so today's fact of the day is it's time to drop the excuses because a woman born with birth defects caused by Chernobyl, including six toes, webbed fingers, no thumbs, one leg shorter than the other, missing some organs, won a gold medal at the Paralympics for cross-country skiing.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. On TikTok, Sarah goes by the name the mobile hairdressing guru. Feels self-appointed. She's a guru. Feels self-appointed. Most gurus are self-appointed. Yeah, exactly.

A guru is not an official qualification. No. Isn't it? No. It's not like a Bachelor of Arts or something. I'm a guru of medicine, for example. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's not something you can study to get. You don't want to go to a doctor who something I'm a guru of medicine for example, that's not something you can study to get You don't want to go to a doctor who says I'm a guru of medicine. Well

she shares hairdressing tips, tricks all that kind of stuff online and she said the one sentence that absolutely drives all hair stylists and hairdressers crazy which is, oh my old hairdresser used to do it like this.

Oh. Right? She was like, that is the sentence that absolutely customers should never say. Because, oh, why don't you go to your old hairdresser then? That's her thing. Why you hear them. Because you couldn't get an appointment with them.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well. I'm not your old hairdresser is the answer to that. So you've got to basically, she's going, because you've got to trust me now. Like I'm here. Let's create something together. Not like you're not doing it exactly like another human being

because of course not. You're different. Yeah. She said that is the one sentence that just drives her insane. I mean, you wouldn't say that to your new partner. Oh, my old partner would do this. Hey babe, I love what you're Good on ya, what you're doing down there

It's just that My old partner used to do it a bit more Imagine You wouldn't say that, would you? You wouldn't say that Absolutely, give some guidance Yeah, but don't ever use the words my old partner Yeah

But I'm sure, this is hairstylist, right? But I'm sure there are sentences like a customer facing jobs that you would always get sick of hearing. And that's what I want to hear. Oh, yes, okay. Whether you work in hospo or retail or any job. I just think anywhere lately. Oh, didn't used to cost that much.

Oh my God, yeah. It's out of this person's hands. They don't decide prices. Like what triggers you in your job when a customer says something? Mine is when I'll do an hour of comedy or acting or whatever and then afterwards the one comment is,

how do you learn all those lines? How do you remember all those lines? You're like, really? That's the reflection. That's a big one for live performance. But that is amazing. They're obviously amazed that you could remember. It's a compliment. It's a big one for live performance. What do you mean? That is amazing. They're obviously amazed that you could remember. It's a compliment. It's not a compliment.

The compliment would be like, wow, how cleverly written or how funny or you're so entertaining. Oh my God, how do you remember all those words? That's insulting. Wow. I'm telling you, this is insulting when people say that. Oh my God, how do you even remember all that? This is what I want to know.

See? Now people won't even know that that's a sentence that actors and comedians hate. That triggers them. Do they all hate it? Yeah. Because that's the least impressive thing that you're doing up there. Is remembering. Okay. And reciting. So in your job, what triggers you? Yeah, what is the one sentence

for you that you hate hearing based on your job? 0800 ZM is our number. You can text her as well. 9696. What is the sentence that you hate hearing based on your job. 0800 ZM is our number. You can text her as well. 9696. What is the sentence that you hate hearing? Play ZM's Fletchford and Ailey.

Play ZM. This is why I just read this top one. I'm a female working in a motorcycle outdoor power equipment shop in the parts. In the parts section of it. Yep. Just get one of the. In the parts section of it. Yep. Just get one of the guys to have a look at it.

So we want to know the sentences that trigger you that you hate hearing in your job. And there is no shortage. We are like blown away with the response. Travel agent here, the sentence that drives me crazy is, oh, I've already bought my ticket somewhere else. I just wanted to check the price. Wasting my time. Because they get

paid on commission, right? Well, some of them do. Yeah. I'm in real estate. I hate the line, we don't really need to sell it that badly. Like when, obviously, someone comes in with a price and then just like, no, we don't need to sell it that badly. You do. You do. You do. You need to sell this house, right?

Yeah. You want to sell it. You want to sell it in this market. That's the situation. When the Airbus doesn't work and every single white male over 30 says, well, I guess it must be free then, I'd like to apologise for my people, but that's a sitter. It's a sitter. And we're going to hit it every time. How much is that?

Must be free. Yeah. I'm a photographer. Your camera's amazing. That's a compliment. It's a compliment. Funny. Funny that.

Not just an iPhone? Yeah, yeah. They did Not just an iPhone Yeah yeah They turn up with an iPhone And a disposable camera I work with water coolers Change their bottles Every day I get

Here to fill it up with beer I work in jewellery I constantly get told Nothing's jumping out at me It's like Yeah it's jewellery mate It doesn't told nothing's jumping out at me. It's like, yeah, it's a jewellery mat. It doesn't jump. Yeah.

Just look at it. Any sort. Somebody said they heard the police and fire department, they'd like to add any form of government job. When the client is somewhat disgruntled, they'll drop the I pay your wages. That's a disgusting thing to say to someone. I know, isn't it?

That's awful. Yeah. I don't know. This person doesn't say what job they work in, but they say, I think I've shit myself. Now, what job? What's the job? We're going to need a job there.

We're going to need to know what job. Or maybe it's just early childhood. Or it's something where they give the bill to people, like, you know, the reception at the dentist, and they're like, I'm going to shit myself. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, because they have to pay it. Because it's such a big bill, maybe. Like, you know, the reception at the dentist and they're like, I'm going to shit myself. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, because they, yeah. Because it's such a big bill maybe. I don't know.

As a nurse, I often hear, last time I came, they just gave me antibiotics. I'm like, yep, that's why you're back. Didn't do anything. Of course. I bet Uber drivers get tired of seeing Busy Night. Busy Night? I never say that to an Uber or a taxi driver. What time are you wrapping up?

Yeah. I've done this. And I'll do it again. Of course you have. While you're here, to an electrician or a plumber. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. While you're here. Isn't it good, though?

They can make more money. We've allocated time to do the job and then have other jobs to do. So it's all been... Right. Yeah, but it won't take long. It won't take long. It's a small job. It's just while you're here. It's a Yeah, but it won't take long. It's a small job. It's just while you're here.

It's a small job. It won't take long. I'm a physio. I love when people say I've got a very high pain tolerance. That usually means they don't. Oh, really? Yeah, they're like,

oh, you're really getting there. I've got a high pain tolerance. Oh, yeah. Ow! You've got your hands full, people say, while I'm walking 14 dogs hands-free because they're all... Oh, you have a belt., while I'm walking 14 dogs hands free because I roll to my straight waist.

Oh, you're out. Yeah. I'm a PT and the worst session is my last trainer didn't work for me. Oh. Is it somebody saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. My last trainer didn't do anything. Yeah, right.

I went like once every month and nothing changed. It was probably because you went home and ate muffins. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yum, though. I do events for you went home and ate muffins. Yeah. Yum though. I do events for a job. I'm a vegan. I get what I'm carrying around food.

No thanks, I'm a vegan. It's like, who cares? Just say no thanks. Yeah. I don't need to know. Yeah. As a female landscaper, I always get asked,

so what do you do for the company? Oh, no. Are you the wife? Are you the company? Oh, no. Are you the wife? Are you the wife? Oh, what? Another emergency department nurse. I hate it when people tell me they have a high pain tolerance.

It almost immediately means they don't. You have to be real gentle with them. Yeah. Oh, my God. You guys get so many holidays. School teacher. Yeah. Radio announcers.

Yeah. Yeah. I'd like. Yeah. Yeah. I'd like an expert gold poured into a Heineken pint glass, please. What? Bartender. And I say no. No, that's embarrassing. You'll get an expert gold in the handle that it's meant to be poured into.

I'm a student midwife, not finished yet. I already hate dealing with mother-in-laws. Oh, yeah. The thing your advice is the equivalent to a bachelor's degree. So every time a woman says, my mum did this with me and I turned out okay, I want to scream. Yeah, you didn't. I'm a funeral director. People say, people must

just be dying to meet you. Oh my God, that's awful. Somebody messaging, because you know I'm getting my shoulder, what is it called? Sonographed. Yeah. I thought, yeah. Ultrasound. But the person who does it is a sonographer. Yeah, and then, yeah. That's the ultrasound. Ultrasound. The person who does a sonographer. Yeah, and then someone texts

in saying that all guys make the same jokes like, don't tell me the gender. What a surprise. I was gonna say that. He had her all up in his sleep. He's all excited to go there and hit them with this joke. I had a whole routine like I'm pregnant. It's gonna look like I'm pregnant. You think they haven't heard that? No, they obviously have.

My husband has an agricultural drone. Oh, I've seen these mega drones. So it's quite big. It can carry up to 50 kilograms. Your husband's hot. It gets used for spraying and got chainsaw attachments. Yeah. What?

I know. Some drones can shoot fire. Yeah. Burn them. Seen that. Seen it. I've seen it. We get asked, so you could fly the kids to school with that.

I'll be not. I'll be attaching my children to a flying chainsaw. Kind of would be funny to see, though. Yeah. I'm a florist. I always get, can you just make me something beautiful? It's like, no, I'm going to make you a shitty bouquet with my name on it. Look, everybody's, and this is, again, it feels like we did it a couple of months ago, didn't it?

Everybody just feels a little bit like. Yeah, tense. There's some tenseness in there. We love to be the station to let you vent and just get off your chest to go into the day. Oh, another one in the bag. It's a Versace bag as well. If you enjoyed that, give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell your mates. You don't sound sincere there, boy.

I'm just reading what's written here. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. your mates. You don't sound sincere there, boy. I'm just reading what's written here.