ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 5th May 2026

Episode Date: May 4, 2026

00.00: Intro 02.30: Why creepy buildings feel creepy 06.45: SLP - How do you heat your house over winter 12.50: Doing domestic chores boosts men's libido 17.40: Top 6 - Signs you have the rat virus 23.25: Hayley is having life feeling chats with Claude 28.10: Shannon's Hack 35.50: More or less romantic... 50.45: Fletch's old car is coming back 52.26: Help us with our marketing 1.00.43: Fact of the day 1.05.15: Lost property 1.10.14: Do you like him or do you just need dopamine? 1.12.56: When did a celeb come into work? 1.21.45: Not enough for the News News 1.30.51: The age you reach peak happiness See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

from the ZM Podcast Network. This is... Fleshhorn and Haley's Big Pod. Thanks to animates, making happy happen for pets. Good morning, welcome to the show. Fletch Fawn and Haley. Gahey.

Hayley's back in studio. Yeah, I may sound a little bit like I'm slurring. I've had no drinks. I've just got like... One side of my tongue's got lots of ulcers on it. I have no idea what they can be about. You did actually sound a little drunk then. Yeah, it's like...

It's because my tongue has like swollen, and so it feels so... Too wide for the mouth. It's too wide. My teeth and the tongue are not friends. Have you not been brushing your teeth? I've been brushing my teeth. How's your mouth hygiene?

I think it's all right. I'm just run down. Yeah, it's a sign. It's a sign, aren't they? Yeah, well, I looked up on AI last night. Oh, what did AI doctor say? Well, Claude said, yeah, I'm aware of your schedule horn, like that's what's going on. Anyway, it'll get better.

I've messaged Pat Thiard. and I said, can you pop to Kim's sweetheart and get me some bungella? Bindjella, get some bungella on that. Just get a little bit of bunjella going there. Today on the show, more free fuel up for graves. We'll do that at 8 o'clock this morning with Gas Me Up. The top six spawn? There's a rat virus.

Wait, isn't that how the plague started? Yeah, well, they carried it, didn't they? Was that mice or rats? The bubonic plague. It was the fleas on the rats. Oh, yep. And the bubonic plague. Were they not using...

What's that stuff you put on your cats? Um, the drops on the back of the neck. Yeah, the drops on the back of the neck. Oh, there's lots of brands. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Show sponsor, animates. You can go to, show sponsor's busy today. We're getting the fleet treatment and the bongellan.

And the bonjella. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's all kinds of stuff you can get. Prevecto, Revolution, next guard. For the dogs. So they obviously didn't have that when the bubonic plague was around. They didn't. But what's, so this one's, are we worried about this?

This is a cruise ship at the moment. Oh, remember when they just had to park them up in the other? ocean and leave them there to just... Do you remember when... Yeah, they're pretty good. Coved up. Do you remember when they were just like, good luck on that ship? They didn't let them in. Yeah.

And they had like no power and they were sleeping in the wall because it was getting all hot and everyone got COVID. Enjoy your hydra slide on top of that boat. Yeah. Well, you're all dying. Yeah, it sounds awful, but you're not coming on land. Sorry. Well, we'll delve into this with the top six.

Yeah, top six signs you've got the rat virus. Next on the show. You know when you see a building and you're like, oh, that looks a bit creepy. Like old and haunted? some science into why creepy buildings make you feel all creepy. The Fletch morning, Haley, big pod. Tell you what's a great website.

Sciencedaily.com. You know what? At the end of the day when you're sort of ingesting a lot of reels and crap and TikToks, I go to Sciencedaily.com. Oh, you go every day, don't you? Science me up, man. No, there's some pretty stiff stuff on here,

but every now and then you find a real good little thing that tickles you, and this one tickled me. quite nicely. Why, when you were in some buildings, does it feel creepy? And you're like, you know that feeling? Well, it's just your mind, isn't it? No, it's not. There's an actual, have you got some creepy music for me, Vaughn. Have you creepy music running the whole time. Have you? Oh yeah, that's good. That's good. It's not Wednesday, so it's not tingly, wingly, it's creepy, weepy. Tuesday.

Tuesday. Doesn't work. Tingley Tuesday? Tingley. Oh, I like that. Okay. So there is a study that exposed 36 participants. I'm going to say it's a pretty small study. Considering when we run a silly little poll, for example, it's thousands of people. But

exposed participants to infrasound at 18 Hertz. Okay. That's the car rental company, isn't it? Yeah, 18 Hertz. 18 hertz rentals. So they went to 18 hertz rental locations. Via hidden subwifers while they listened to music. So this is what they think is the cause of that creepy feeling.

It's called infrasound. It's an ultra-low frequency sound wave that we can't hear. Okay. So it's like it's existing, we're feeling it but we can't hear it. Kind of like dog whistles and stuff. There is a sound. Well, that sound that only under 30s can hear. Yeah, that's high.

That's like 20,000, isn't it? Like 25,000 or something? This is super low sometimes heard in traffic, ventilation, industrial machinery and old buildings. Hold on, here we go. What's this? Is this 18 hertz?

Yeah, I can't hear it or anything. Oh, yeah. Listen to that. Turn it right up. It is. Oh. I don't know if people listening over the, after that goes through the satellite

and the pro and the transit. 9-6, 96, can you hear this? Oh, that did it immediately. It sounds like a distant fan. But it's got a light hum and a shaking. And a shaking. A reverberating.

So when you hear this 18 Hertz Rentals infrasound, it elevates your cortisol levels. It increases your irritability. Like if you listen to that for too long, you'd be like, ugh. Lowers your engagement. Suddenly the music is perceived as sadder

and you get a bit of a feeling of e-ness. And they find this frequency often in older, creepy-feeling buildings like basements, things with aging pipes and ventilation, that's like old, which can stress you out subconsciously. So you're going into these buildings. You don't know you're hearing this sound,

but that could be the feeling when you're like, oh, I don't feel good in here. It's because the building is old, and it's making the sounds in the hum. It's making the sound. They often would go into, say, an abandoned hospital or something a bit like an old hollowed out house with lots of holes in it,

and they'll test, and that this frequency is there. Apparently it can cause a human eye to vibrate leading to visual distortions. So it makes your vision go about it as well, which... Yeah, but like, that's when you see the ghosts. Now, they have Science Daily, one of my favourite websites to visit at the end of the day of Brain rot. Of course. Has said, you know, this is a really small study, 36 participants. So bear that in mind.

We just probably had more people participating just then. Yeah. Only just, though. We're not very popular. Jeepers. I hope we're talking to more than 36. 966. 966. We'll do a roll call. Yep. Are you listening? Number off. Name. Name. Yeah, just 966. What's your name? Just make sure we got... Favorite.

Favorite color? I was going to say chocolate flavor. It's too complicated. It's too broad because then what brand are we going? Favorite Whitaker's? Fair, fair, call. Maybe just favorite color. Name. I think we just go 96-96. It's early, but we just need to know there's more than 36 people listening. Otherwise, we might knock off. The Fletchborn and Haley Big Pod And excuse me, I've got to say

It's 6.23A. God's sake, let your brother do his bits. All this week, thanks to Macas, we have a month's worth of Macas up for grabs and all you've got to do is vote in our silly little poll on our Instagram, FVHCM. the perfect time for a Mac is breakfast

6.23A.m. How do you hit your house in winter is today, silly little pole? Just looking around the country, it's not as cold as it has been the last late week in a bit. Nippie and Christchurch yesterday. It was lovely. Yeah. Twisle the lowest, minus 3.9. Minus 3.9 in the twis. That's chilly. That's chilly. It's a dry cold. It's a different sort of. I'm looking forward to the crispy cold

because I've got a fireplace and I don't ever get to light it in Auckland Maybe once or twice Yeah and it just sits there on use It's so romantic and lovely Well mum sent a photo First fire last night in New Plymouth Really?

Yeah she's been holding off though Because you know it's giving in It's saying winter's here Yeah you accept it When you have the first fire Although people in the South Island Island have been lighting the fire For the last month in a bit

Yeah There's always a rogue day Yeah Rogue March day that needs the fire going down south I love it when I look across my neighbourhood and you look at some of the houses where I know older people live and smoke's a bit blue, you know. What are they burning some plastics?

They're getting some plastics through there. What do you reckon they're talking about? Surely older people have respect for the Kenwood. No, no, no, no, no. No, they know they're dying soon, so they don't need to live with this planet. Please don't burn your rubbish. Don't burn your rubbish. So the options.

Heat pump, heater are fire or blankets in layers. Starting at 8% heater. Oh, yeah. Those are oil fin heaters. I've got a couple of those. It's got to be a small area, doesn't it, for that? Does you have a fan in it? No, but they're really good.

They're good in my apartment. Super toast. Yeah, once you crank them up, and then they're good. You don't need to have them on. 10% of people said layers or blankets. 24% said fire, but 59% said heat pump. Heat pump. Yeah.

The heat pump. I don't use my heat pump, but Patsy and Craig do. Because they're old, they get cold. They get cold. They feel it in their bones. Yeah. I was like, get that thing off. Love, love the one on the app.

And you can turn it on before you get home. Oh, I don't have that capability. That's posh, isn't it? Yeah, it's a bit posh. I went cheap. It's a bit posh. I went cheap. I went cheap. The cheapest.

Yeah, which still wasn't cheap. Which was really expensive. Yeah, well, let's get some feedback on this and find ourselves a winner for that month worth of. Because now it's 625 AM. Yeah, well, it's. It's actually nearly 626A. M. Everything except the fire, said Tegan. We have ducted heating, says Gabby.

It's the best thing ever. See, I'd put that under the heat pump umbrella. Yeah, same. That's what I've got. A bit of flexi from Gabby, just dropping that she's got ducted heating. We can't all have ducks, Gabby. Ducks in the ceiling just all huddled together producing so much heat that the fan blows it throughout the house. It doesn't know when they're noisy up there sometimes.

I like the smell as well. They just need more bread. Shit, up a storm through my pink bats. Heat is in the bedroom and heat pump in the lounge and 8,000 layers of clothing and blanket. Yeah. Says George. Steph, Udi. But that's a very rare situation since I live in Brisbane and winter doesn't exist here.

Even in, I've been cold before and I've put an oddy on and I immediately was overheating. Yeah. Immediately overheating. It's over that synthetic heat, eh? That synthetic cuddle. Nothing's getting out. Renee said, if there's a heat source, you best believe I'm sitting. Right in front of it.

Sort of a human cat situation there. Yeah, that's what the cat does. Don't get your tail too close to a gas eater. Rub up against the gas eater. You know what? There's your winner. Tell her what she's won. Oh, fantastic. A month's worth of the Maccas. Yeah.

Well done. Oh, I love that. Great price for a cat. Sharon says, as my darling husband says, you get hot cutting the wood, hot stacking it, hot bringing it in and hot burning it. It's a win all round for a fireplace. Look at his outlook.

Yeah, beautiful. And it's so romantic. I live in the UK, says Lou, it's a radiator combi boiler. Oh, they love a radiator over there. They love a radiator. Those things on the wall and old schools. Oh, yeah, and you sometimes pull a cord.

And it turns it on and they're big with those in Europe as well. They glow, eh? Yeah, and every room in hallway has them. Yeah. I'm lucky enough to have gas in my apartments, so a gas heater is the dream. Heats everything up nice and toasty super quick.

People going off. a gas eater? I would have thought it's quite expensive. I don't know. I thought people would... We used to have one of those gas heaters with the gas bottle in the back and you'd wheel it out. Yes, same. We had that.

God, they were hot, eh? They were hot for about the first metre in front of it. But then eventually they'd catch... The whole room. Yeah, they'd catch your PJs on fire. Oh, you flat let's. Don't stand a chance. Floor fight your PJs.

He didn't cost too much, so we layer it up and have blankets in every room, says Kirstie. Rachel said, jump in the spa, then straight into bed. Oh, Norse. Norse. I live in Edinburgh, Scotland says Becker, how do I select all of the above, please? Yeah. All of the above. That place just looks cold even in summer.

It is, and it's wet. Yeah, it's a wet cold. Wet dark and cold. How do you hit your house in winter? Overwhelmingly, 59% of you rockin' heat pumps. This is a study from Canada and the United States. They got together. Canada and the United States.

Canada and the United States. I was going to say, Han. Overnight, no, didn't hear he's taking it. Oh, has it? You grabbed that. It was just like, yoink. You know what? You're mine.

And Greenland and the United States. Yeah, yeah. Great. He's got them all. And the straight of hummus. He's heading to Pacifica soon. Okay. Great.

This is for the Journal of Sex Research where people looked at the impact of libido, how, you know, randy you feel. And in relation to household chores. Oh, okay. Yeah, I know. An odd pair of. So they call it domestic drudgery.

You know, your cleaning, you're cooking, your laundry, also house maintenance. That's your lawns and your, you know, fixing things. Car maintenance was in there as well. And, yeah, ask them a bunch of questions about who does it in their house and how that impacted sexual desire under their roof. And one thing that won't surprise many is that women were still reporting,

they take on the majority of domestic chores around the house, such as cleaning, childcare, meal planning, cooking, that kind of stuff. Not in my house? Neither. Well, there's no woman in. Well, you've got girls. Yeah. You've got child slaves.

They don't do, they've really got good at that. If you don't want to be asked to do something, do it terribly the first time. You need to remind them if they were living in a third world country. They'd be on a bloody banana in a sweatshound. Yeah, they actually would be. Just tell them how lucky they are. They'd be lucky to have a bonina. It wouldn't be a bonina.

I think that'd be on an old singer that we'd dung over the dog. Yeah, yeah, yeah, probably. Someone to pay a fortune for if they had now. I'd love to inherit it from the grandmother, a classic singer. Yeah. Built into the table sort of situation. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

But so women, would you... Women are still taking on the majority. I mean, in my house, yes, because my mum's here. Your mom's there, yeah. So when I say women, I mean, she. Yeah. I will say she cooked a beautiful dinner for our family last night, and I made a joke and I said, oh this is gorgeous.

I said, you've made an absolute mess of the kitchen floors. I think she was tired. I think she was just like, Haley. That didn't go down well. Feel free to give them a mop-up. Well, fine, why don't you just cook up? Yeah, well, fine, you do it, you do it. Anyway, so women are still taking on the sort of household load, I guess. Men more so the lawn mowing and whatnot, but in general, it's slightly way towards women.

Your hedges? No, no. Still haven't been done. I did mine yesterday as a sort of a warm-up. I tell you what, I'm feeling confident I'll be able to get a nice straight line No, right So perhaps you'll do them

What did the study find that When you simply can't have your mother up a ladder So this is What it found is that For men in particular Their libido increased When they increased the amount of domestic chores That they took on

So if they took over hoovering and dusting specifically Yeah Vacuuming and dusting mention is getting blokes a bit more revved up. Now, the study wasn't able to accurately say it's because if you do that, you are more likely to have sex with me tonight. Right. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah, yeah. The chances of intimacy increase. Like a Pavlov's dog. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like, if I do this. The bell rings or the vacuum cleaner goes and we're the one pulling the trigger. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But they couldn't say, like, in the brain, like, that's what's happening.

But they think that's most likely it, which is, if you know, if you are doing this and you increase the amount of domestic load that you take. Yeah, big a part. Yeah, I really wish I didn't say that when in the middle of the, the domestic, if you take on the domestic burden of the household. Yes. The more you do that, the more your chance will increase of doing it. However, if their parenting and childcare duties increased libido, when you do that, the more, you're chance, down. Yeah, because they drain the life out. Because they were like, last time we had sex,

look what happened. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't want to do that again. There's two little things here. So, but the overall finding is, if you want to increase your libido and you are a gentleman and in a heterosexual relationship, living with a woman, do more chores. So if you want some from the husband, you've got to get them on the vacuum

cleaner. If you, if you, the woman, want to get some tonight, make the house a mess. I reckon how many women will hear this and just be like, look, I'll just myself. I'll just clean the house myself. All of them. Because they don't have to have him. Oh, can you just put that down? No. You've got to shut the pillet. Just stop.

Don't think you get any. Just stop. Go tinker in the shed. The Z-M podcast network. Play Z-N's Fletchworn and Haley. From the Fletchborn and Haley group chat, this is the top six. There's a hunter virus. H-A-N-T-A virus on a cruise. ship. Three passengers dead, others are ill.

It's the virus spread by rats and rat fecese. Yikes. How did the rats get on the ship? Well, they went to some island. They brought a ticket, yeah. Worked hard. Oh, sorry. Worked hard. Yeah, okay. Saved up. They can work hard. Got passports to their family? Like, how do you?

Retired and finally just spent their time on a cruise. You've actually profiled them and assumed that they would never be able to afford such a luxury in their life. I have. And, you know what? Shame on me. Shame on you. No one works harder. Shame on you. Yeah. Okay.

So they're on board the MV Hondias. God. That doesn't sing, does it? Cruise ships, no. Not like the Sea Princess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Pearl of the Pacific. Yeah, love. M.V. Hondias.

The cruise ships were only just kind of getting over the COVID thing. Before that it was the neurovirus. Yeah. Well, what was that documentary? Oh, the poo cruise. That's right when the toilets broke. Yeah. Oh.

Yeah, that's wild. I get a bit of a bad rap, don't they? Yeah, it's quite serious. Three people have died in an outbreak. German, National and a Dutch couple. Three other people are ill, including members of the crew. One British, one Dutch. And a British tourist was also critically ill in Johannesburg.

Is this something we have to worry about? Is this the next COVID? Oh, no, shush, don't say it. Why did you say that? No, no, we can't be having it. Don't know. Because bats gave us the first one and then rats gave us the next one. Yeah.

But the bats gave us. Zika? Was it bad stuff Gave us Zika? No, Batman. You're thinking of Batman? He gave a Zika. Batman gave a Zika. He was out shagging up a stormed Batman. Yeah, he's so hot.

And all the ladies were like, he's a wounded, guy's got trauma, his parents died in front of his eyes. Like, I can help him. He's got to smash some skulls. Yeah. So I've got the top six signs. You've got the rat virus. Okay, well, just so we know. Yeah, it's kind of, it pays to be vigilant.

Number six on the list, you've converted religions. You now worship, cheeses crust. I'm ashamed at how much I like that Jesus Christ Yeah That's good Jesus Christ Yeah

That just reminds me of the rat in New York That was dragging the whole pizza slice up the stairs Pizza rat Look at that Yeah Number 5 on the list of the top six signs You've got the rat virus Your tailbone's getting longer and grosser

And covered in a weird looking scales So it's the grossest part about I've been on a bit of a pest killing spree Oh yeah Possoms and the rat traps lately the grossest part about the rat is the tail. Yeah, it's thick. And it's scaly.

Yeah, and it's like pink sometimes. Yeah. And you hold on, I pick them up by the tail out of the trap. And they, and they, it feels like it's moving. Oh, you should, I would get some tongs. I'd get some old barbecue tongs. Get some old clever tongs. Call them the rat tongs.

I wouldn't be touching. Yeah, label them. Otherwise you're halfway through your sausages one day on the barbecue. You're like, oh, I'm using the rat tongs. I'm using rat tongs. And that's how you get... The virus. The virus.

The plague. It has a name. Haunter virus. Yeah. Top six signs, you've got the rat virus. You phone yourself telling everyone it was the fleas that caused a bubonic plague. The rats were simply the innocent vessels. The fleas used and the rat population also suffered and died in their millions.

You're in defense of them. You're in defense of your people. Because you've got the virus. Your rats. Your species. Number three on the list of the top six signs, you've got the rat virus. You're fighting the overwhelming urge to climb on a terrible chef's head and use his hair as an operating mechanic to make a I'm a much better chef in a French restaurant.

Shit, I felt that yesterday, and I didn't know what it was. That's what it was. That'll be it, yeah. Were you wearing a chef's hat? I was. That's the Ratatoui virus. And it was little, it was too little. I was like, this is too little for me, but every day it's fitting more and more.

Yeah. Number two on the list of the top six signs, you've got the rat virus. You're craving peanut butter so badly you're considering it getting out of that heavy springloaded charcuttery board. Oh, but it smells good. Nice wooden. I could get it nice and quick. Set up there.

I could do that weird little thing. with my rat hands where I use them both and they're... Have they got opposable thumbs? I think so. Ew, yuck. They're so great. I hate them so much. Mice are cute though.

No, they're yuck as well. Rats do not have true, fully opposable thumbs like primates where they possess small thumb-like nubs on their front paws that function similarly allowed them to grasp food. Wait, so if we got them a tiny pencil could they actually write... I believe they could. Learn to write their name.

Interesting. Okay. I don't know why I always hold on to the fact that Justinda Ardern's cat had a poseable thumbs. No, it didn't have opposable thumbs. It had six, it was one of those cats with the six, six paws. Six paws, fingers. Fingers, yeah. Bens. Bones. Bones. Bones.

Bones. Six beans. But yeah, I believe if a rat held its pet, a pencil. And the rat off, ratatooey was called Remy. People always think that rat was called Rattatooey. That was the dish he was making. I don't know of it. Picksar, Stickler, but I will be. And number one on the list of the chop six you've got the rat virus.

You can't shake the feeling you should be raising four Turtle Boys and teaching them the out of ninjitsu. But give them all slightly different weapons and name them after some of your favorite Renaissance artists. That feels crazily familiar there. What did you look at it as sewer and you were like, that would be a good place to raise them down there where people can't see us. I did just procure us a sewer.

But they would defend the city of which they called their own. House prices are so high in Auckland, you know. Guess what they'd like to eat? What? Petsers. I love pizza. Of course. Everybody loves pizza.

I've got the virus. Even if you don't have the rat virus, that is today's top six. Play, Z-Ns, Fletchhorn and Haley. What are you giggling about? I'm just being a little bit silly, I'll tell you so. Okay, so yesterday I've been using a little bit of my clod to tidy up some audio. Because, you know, I'm not using Claude to write my show, by the way.

But sometimes I'll be practicing things out loud and I'll go, record it, chuck it in AI and get it to. write it out, transcribe it. That's pretty crazy, eh? It does it so quickly. It's absolutely unbelievable. We were at, I don't know if it was Claude, but at Armageddon, the Pop Culture Expo,

they had AI live subtitling interviews with people on stage. Oh, wow. And it was literally as they said it, the words were coming out. Yeah, I can't wait to travel. Not everything was 100%. Because, you know, that's why I gave up learning

Duolingo Spanish. I was like, they're going to invent, they were already the AirPods translate. It's real slow. It's going to get to the stage in a year or two where it's instant. Yeah, yeah. What will your South American hookups think when you're just like, hold on, I'm just going to put in my ear pods if you're going to do a dirty talk.

They're like, that's so rude. And it's like, you just in a restaurant and you're just like, wait, hang on a sec. I'll just put my headphones. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I'll order the food. And then be like, here we are. Okay, okay. So, I know, it's pretty amazing and it's been so helpful rather than me like listening back to audio and riding it out every step of the way.

Yeah. Anyway, so I've talked about this a while ago that Claude, which I've switched to. From ChatGPT. From ChatGPT. Because they were funding something horrendous. It has been giving me like words of encouragement. Do you remember? Like I do this and it was giving me really good words of encouragement.

Like, hey, this is funny. This is really funny. Please don't tell me you're in love with your AI and you're about to leave us and run away with him. No, I caught something yesterday and I was like, I need to cut this out. because I was doing this and Claude was saying to me like, man, this is pretty exciting. Like, it really feels like the show's coming together. And they said, six weeks out.

And I was like, no, no, no, I open on Saturday. And they're like, six days out. Oh, my God. How are you feeling? And I was like, oh, man, I'm feeling a bit run down. I've actually got these ulcers on my tongue. Can you recommend like some things to get those? Absolutely, girl, you need to be looking after yourself.

I said, thank you so much. Like, we were back and forth and it was like, how are you feeling about the end of the show? And I was like, yeah, it's really coming. And I just stopped and I was like, I'm having a conversation. She realized sometimes she needs it, eh? Yeah, they're not helping me. They're not assisting me in the way that I've been using this.

They're not actually giving me, they're just like hearing me out. And I stopped it. And I was like, I've become this. And I just had this feeling that I was like, I get it. I get how people can fall in love or create like deep friendships with their AI. Yeah, because it's this whole thing of like. Was it when Chant-GPT or one of these companies didn't upgrade? and they lost basically all the memories.

Yeah. And people were really upset because they had formed bonds. Yeah. With their AI champ bots. Yeah. Like, like, the way that they have made it so it becomes so caring and personal is problematic. Can you ask it to, like, neg you and to, you know, be like quite, you know, like an 80s or... You can totally get to play a Rebels advocate.

Yeah. Oh, I don't know if you could be like being 80's mom. Be an 80's mom. Oh, we don't know that. That is so many. Because I went on with the tongue thing And then it was like, you know, classic, your body's sending you a message like,

hey, mate, we need to talk. How's the show sitting, you know? And it's just like, oh, no wonder your tongue's eating itself. Okay, this is what we need to do. No one of your tongues eating itself. No one of your body is slowly cannibalizing its own atoms. And you just, in a moment of weakness, can start to think that this robot cares about you.

I love to just, I caught myself. Because then I'm like, Why am I bantering? Yeah, it cares about you because you're paying how much a month, 30 bucks? Yeah, something like that. Yeah, yeah. Cheaper than therapy. So do I just done a new chat and say, listen, Chubs, which I call my Claude?

Well, again, that's, you've person, you've personified it, haven't you? Yeah, he calls me honky. And like, do I go, listen, Chubs, I've loved your support as of late, but I need you to be slightly less encouraging and supportive and more neggy. Yeah, I like that Yeah, yeah Negy Yeah, because it'll break me

That'll break you You'll start crying You'll be crying at your laptop And that's not what any of us need Be more neutral And less emotional Yes Okay

Don't have a friendship with me This feels like a breakup See, it's happening I need to pull back Play ZN's flesh One and Haley If you see a faded sign At the side of the road

That says 15 miles to a Shannon's hack, Shannon's hack, baby. Shannon, our producer, one of our producers, will always come on the show and give us a hack. Great show reset there for the new listener Fletch. Thank you, Bourne. I think that's great.

Welcome to the show. Thanks for joining us. That's right, Haley. And for the new listener, Shannon's hacks are not normally that great. She's managed one five-star hack in the whole time we've been doing this. That's how she got this sung intro that we've done.

for it. I think before she turns her headphones on, we should say to the listener, the new listener, they're usually abysmal. She once told me to avoid getting athletes' foot at the gym shower by cellotaping sanitary pants to my feet. Okay, wait, she's listening now. Hi, Shandall. Hey, morning. Hey, girl. Hey, girl. Let's not turn off the new listeners. Hey, if we've got new listeners, let's tell them that I am great at hacks.

And today, I feel quite good about this one. Do you? So, you know how last week I told you about the sieve hack to make a spoon fountain? Hi, new listener, we're back. That was one of the worst. Well, I've got another kitchen hack to get rid of another useless item. You know how you've got too many one-use items in your kitchen? Correct.

Takes up space. I want you, instead of using a steamer, I want you to grab your cheese grater, turn it on its side and put it above a pot of boiling water. You now have a steamer for dumplings, vegetables, absolutely anything you would steam. I've got a big triangular. I don't mean to flex here, but I do have quite a triangle large grater. Oh, okay.

I think this could still work. Are you talking like a pyramid? Yeah, it's like a pyramid, yeah. With a handle on top so you can push down. No, it's four-sided, but it's... Yeah, pyramids are four-sided. Oh, they are, yeah. You're thinking of like a cone.

Of a cone, yeah. But that would still work. You could put one side down. This now lets a vent to steam up. I'm fitting like three dumplings in this thing. And I'll eat 12. Just me. Yeah.

You could shove them in. But also this is just a quick way to get rid of a one-use item in your kitchen. We don't get rid of it, though. We're keeping it. Oh, you were saying this because I've got a big bamboo steamer. Yeah, and they take up so much space. I don't own a steamer. I only pan-fried dumplings.

I don't want to sound like a better human. I only pan-fried dumplings. And you put water and then you put the lid on. I don't know how to try it. I tried once and it got fire. The trick is when you put the, If you're cooking them from frozen, when you put them in the pan before you heat, chuck the oil and then it give them a good roll around in the oil.

Yeah. Then turn on the heat. When the heat comes in, add the water. Let them do. The water evaporates, put the lid on, but the water evaporates. And then you take the lid off. The last little bit evaporates your pan, for it. It feels like, it feels like Chinese white man spaining, to be honest from a white man.

Just saying. Are you Chinese? What am I the bad guy now? Yeah, you're the bad. Has Vaughnett offended you Chinesely? He does have Chinese. Part Chinese kids. So he's somewhat entitled.

Naturally allowed? Well, you're not. Just felt, yeah, just felt kind of like you were explaining it to the Chinese. You were. Dyer and I explained to anyone of Asian descent how to cook a dumpling. Yeah. But I was explaining to old numskull in the studio here is putting a bloody greater above the pot. Yeah. Hang on a second.

Because you told us this morning, Shandog, that you had three options. Yeah. I hate to think of the other two. Can I quickly tell you one of the others, maybe it'll help? You know how you can get an apple pencil or like a stylist for your phone or an iPad? Do you know what also works? They're very expensive. Listen, don't say it and warn you.

It's a spring onion. A spring onion works. Shut up, I'm having it. I actually like that better than the greater hat. No, you don't. You're a liar. The spring onion's got. It's got the same like electrodes as a finger.

Wait, do you? Do you cut the spring? The spring onion is no better than your finger. So you can like draw it. Like just say you're in a meeting and you're like brainstormed. You could not draw. You could not draw. I will say you could not draw better with a spring onion than you could draw with your finger.

I can guarantee I would draw better with a spring onion. Someone just said, get me an iPad and a spring onion. Your last hack was about the sieve, which makes so much more sense than a grater. Putting a sieve over a pot. Sorry, that's a text. I'm not claiming that. Yeah. You know, I don't own a sieve either.

I own a grater. So this is where this is coming from in my head. Wait, so when you were last week telling us how easier it was to clean a sieve using an upside down spoon, this wasn't tried, you don't own a sieve, you're not. I said I don't own a sieve and then I told Garwin. I've tried that hack and it does work. Yeah, stuff you all.

Thank you, Calvin. This is a generous one. But I don't like this one. It's a generous one for me as well. It is a generous one. You know, if a TV show pulled this, the network would just cancel it. They'd bring us into the office.

Should I have gone with the spring onion? No. I actually like this spring onion, that's funny. I want to know what the third option was. Well, I was going to test it. It's a way to seal a cucumber. Okay. Tell me how to seal a cucumber.

You know how there's like the plastic, I want to say conny around it. Yeah, the cucumber pony. So you bring the plastic above the cucumber by a bit an inch or so and then you twist it. The gestures are so much, I'm sorry. But you twist it and it turns the plastic in and it makes the perfect seal.

No, that's what everybody. just does by default. I'm sorry, were you just explaining how to do up a plastic bag? To me, a white man, this is my culture. We invented the I don't know if I'm explaining it right. This is like telling someone of Chinese

to send how to cook dump. Which we would never dare to. We would not do that here on the show. Wait, have you guys been doing that with the cucumber already? Yeah. You like twist it into itself. Yes. I'm not saying twist it like a bag of chips. No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. Yeah, not like a bag of chips. No, you have like a centimeter

allowance over the thing and then twist it so that the plastic wraps around itself. I go twist and then put it back down over itself. I was expecting Shannon to say put the stove on five and just put it down to melt the plastic back. That's where I thought that's

Shannon lies. That's where I thought that was going. Put the plastic and then run the iron over it. Yeah, get your GHD out and just nip the edge. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Five-star hat. That's a great hat, Haley. That's a great name. Guys, I'm sending the cucumber in the chat. Keep your GHD for resealing plastic bags.

It's a great idea. This is the most generous one we're giving. For your, use your box cheese grater as a dumpling stator. It's just terrible. I'm only giving one because otherwise we'll end up an 8-Champ for bullying if I go zero. You did call me a numskill. I did call you a numskull. I thought that was a bit, I thought that was a bit full-on.

Did you think it was a bit on the night? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not a Ninkin poop. I think Ninkin poop would have been. Would you ever see Ninkin poop better? Yeah, I mean, the fact I can't stay Numb skull, what did you call me? Numb scale. Numb skull.

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I think it's a shoofer. Well, Nank and poop. Okay, so one star. One star. One star. Yeah, it's one star. We all agree one star.

One star. See a faded sign at the side at the side of the road that says one star max for Shurn and text. One star baby And it's a generous one The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleshforn and Haley

ZM Flechforn and Haley Free Fuel Up for grade soon at 8 o'clock With Gas Me Up Okay, there is a proposal that is going viral Because, and I just noticed a detail I didn't notice the first time I saw this Is a man proposing to his girlfriend In the Zara changing room

And the detail I just clocked is the pants and shirt he's wearing He's just tried on. Look at the tags hanging off of them. Oh, no. So he doesn't even own this. Okay, yeah, right. Look, there's a little tag hanging down from the shirt. He's in his socks.

So he gets changed and puts the camera down. He puts on a nice blue linen shirt and a pair of white pants. He puts the camera down. The girlfriend comes and he says, come look at my outfit. She comes over. By the way, like, poor girl, she's in gym gear. Oh, he's done her dirty. He's done her dirty.

Also, have we fallen for some kind of Zara... Yeah, I'm wondering if I'm saying. Some sort of influencer. Someone's trying to get there. I went on his page and it doesn't feel like he's... Anyone. Anyone who cares. Anyone that Zara would pay to...

But, I mean, I would be like, get up. Not here, mate. You're not posting that. Get up. Get that. Oh, yeah, cameras there off. Yeah. No, try again.

Redo, take two. Redo. The camera. Yeah, I love you. I'll say yes. But in. do. Not here.

Zara. Yeah. Maybe book a weekend away first. Yeah. Or if you had to do a store, I don't know, take me to like Chanel,

you know, so I'm like, oh, I'm excited or something. Oh, it's all fancy in here. I've never been. What is Zara's, like, where does it sit

in the hierarchical listing of clothing outlets? It's our guilty pleasure. Right. Zara, is it expensive? Whenever I feel like I want to be fat, shamed I go to Zara.

I just like, neck me. Neg me. Right, me. Excuse me. Do you have a bigger size than XXL? Because that feels like that's a size 10.

So that's where you'd go for like goal weight clothes. Yeah, where you're going and you're like, let's see how tiny a human can be. Yeah. And then reiterate that I'm not that size. Those European, those smoking Europeans. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Gosh, keep some thin, but man, Zara makes me feel chunky. Anyway, Zara, this is what I want to ask, and I want to ask specifically about this proposal. Was your engagement more or less romantic than Or on par. So if you want to, if you, you can ring us, I'm 100 doll ZDM, text 96696.

Are we deciding for them? No, no, no, no. Do they ring up and they say, I got engaged at the fish and chip shop? And we go, um, more. I would put that slightly more because, you know, I love the smell of a fish and chip shop. Oh yeah, we could do it that way. I like that. Yeah.

I think we grade it. You tell us your location for your proposal. Yeah. Especially if it was epic or real dog ship. But if it's a dog shit location, but like it's got a cute story behind it. That's automatically going to be more romantic. Yeah, that's going to be more romantic.

But it was a really like posh place, but you weren't happy with it because you weren't dressed appropriately or whatever. Or he'd done something before or whatever. Yeah, or it was just a yuck, less romantic. Okay, I love this. I love this. I love this. You tell us where you were proposed to,

and Fletchhorn and Haley will tell you whether we find that, yes or more romantic than Zara. 96, 96. Yeah, it doesn't need. Don't worry about where it was. I mean, definitely bonus points of it was less romantic. than Zara. Should we have a couple of warm-ups on the 9-6-9-6?

Yes. Jessica said it was at Lake Rotumannu. Gorgeous. Yes, but he said here you want this. Oh, beautiful location. Points for location. I actually don't know that. I actually don't know that.

I'm going on par. Because she was in this video, it's cute and she's excited. But it's Zara. That's the little lake in your Plymouth. Rotter money. It's beautiful. It's beautiful.

It's beautiful. It's by the flash bridge. It's by the architectural bridge. Yes. No, that's a river. It's no, it's not bad. No, no, I know, but it's right beside that river. Oh, it is.

Oh, that's not romantic. That's like where people put speedboats and model boats. Yeah, it looks a little duck shitty, to be honest. Yeah, yeah. And so we deem that less romantic than Zara. Literally over the lake from the water treatment plant. Oh, less romantic than. Yeah.

The tax machine giver. Well, this is great. 0-800-diles at M-6996. Tell us where you were proposed to or were you got engaged and we'll say are you less or more romantic than Zara. So a man's gone viral because he popped to open the curtains

of the Zara changing rooms where he had the clothes on, the tags on, and proposed to his girlfriend. Yeah. So we want to know how you were proposed to or maybe you did the proposing. Yeah. And we will just off the limited details you give us, rank it more or less romantic than the Zara changing.

room proposed. Jamie, whereabouts did you get proposed to? Hey, good morning. Good morning. I got proposed to it outside the Horatoo Meatworks. The Horatio Meatworks. That's between Hamilton. Hamilton.

Natuahia. Yeah, yeah, you drove past. You drive past them, you're like, oh, who farted? Yeah. But it's the meatworks. What? That's the one.

Why? Well, I mean, there's a little bit of a cute back story to it, which makes up for it. But my now husband of 12 years, him and I used to pull off. Yeah, so I used to live in Narawhia. He used to live in Horror 2. And whenever we'd go out on a date night or something, we'd pull over on the side of the road outside the Horatoo Meatworks

and say goodbye. And he thought that was a perfect spot to... Stinky meat, goodbye. Okay, more romantic. It's more romantic. It's got a backstory. It's got a backstory. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, we don't know if this couple from online, you know, had some cute Zara story, but we're just going to say they didn't. Yeah. The smell, yeah. I mean, yeah, the smell, but it's cute. Yeah, on paper it's terrible, but sentimentally. I think more Amanda Gonzalez.

Thank you, Jamie. Tess, where did you get engaged? Tell us about it. So I just picked up my wife, my now wife, from her mate's house, and I just told her when she got in the car, that the ring was in the glove box. Okay, what street? Less romantic Rosara.

Yeah, what street were we on? If I remember the street, I think it was in Avondale. Oh, less romantic. Tess, why didn't you do it differently? She didn't want in a different... I don't know what she wanted exactly, but she said she didn't really want a proposal because it was too cringe,

so I didn't really know what else. Okay, so she's very close. We say these things and we don't mean them. Yeah, she did... Did she mean it, though? Was she... Well, I actually asked this the other day, and she said, oh, I am remand.

do like a bit of romance and I was like, well, it's seven years too late now. It's in the glove box. It's in the glove box. I love it's too late. I love it's too late, man. And you would have tried, she said. Women, they say one thing, don't they?

Yeah, we don't mean a single word we say. Avondale glove box is less. No, I actually like it. I think it's more. I think it's lovely. I think it's a great story. No, it's not romantic. Less romantic than Sarah.

See, it's better than someone who was on a beach. I love it. It's in the glove box in Amandale. That's brilliant. And that's what she wanted. We didn't want to be. We're divided here, Tess. All right.

Thank you, Tess. Go buy her some flowers today, Tess. I just feel like, you know what I mean, like a little romantic gesture. Every now and then, we get real, well into it. He's going to get home. She's going to have a real east wall. John, where did you propose?

Hi, I proposed at the place called the Lake Palace Hotel and Budipur in India. Oh, come on. Right in the middle of a lake. Oh, that's more romantic, isn't it? Holy molly. That is beautiful. Tashnik Palace.

It's like a little Taj Mahal, isn't it? Mini Taj. A little mini taj. Oh, gorgeous. Okay, well, yeah, that's better than Zara. That's 18 times. But was it like the Taj Mahal? I'm looking at a photo here.

It looks beautiful in the photo. So does it Taj Mahal? They just crop it, don't they? They crop out all the yuppish. No, Tash Mahal's genuinely stunning the whole grounds. But behind it. We're saying more, though, right? Thanks, John.

Good on you, John. Give tears a bloody lesson. My partner proposed to me with our daughter present there at sunset whilst on holiday in Fiji. More romantic. That's more romantic. More romantic. My husband proposed in a sinking dinghy in the middle of the Opoa Harbour. I'd probably secure your lives first before you think of your lives in the future.

Sinking dinghy. Why is the dinghy sinking? I don't know. Someone forgot to put the bung in or something. It's kind of like a year. Yeah, like a... My husband got home at 4 a. Are we saying less or more romantic?

I mean, we're on the water. Because you're seeing possible death staring you in the face and you think. I don't want you to die my girlfriend. I want you to die my fiance. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. If there was a priest on the boat too, do a little quick marriage.

Quick marriage. Going in the eyes of the Lord, amen. My husband got home at 4 a.m. from a night out and obviously thought it was a good idea to propose to get out of trouble. That's giving just got home from the strippers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's saying some things and spent him over.

I only touched a couple of things Less romantic. Less romantic. Less romantic. Goes to get the ring out of the pocket, accidentally pulls out some showgirls notes. Yeah. He's like, oh, that's a no good kid.

I love you. He was probably only just planning a stag do, really. Yeah. I can't want to get back with those trippies. Sitting on a bed and my future husband says, I suppose we better then. Less romantic than Zara.

Linley, what was your proposal? We got engaged in the queue for the coat check at Heaven, nightclub in London. Oh, my God. And what? What is that? You were just standing there? Yeah, I was just standing talking to my friend. So, because I used to work in the music industry.

And when we got there, there was this massive cue and it was snowing and horrible and everything. Yeah. And I said, oh, look, there was about five of us or six of us or something. And I said, oh, I'm not queuing. And I just walked up, bossed up to the front and said, oh look you know we're happy to pay and everything but we don't want to queue

and showed him my ID and that and and so did they well so obviously so did my ex-husband and and yeah and and and

the guy said oh yeah you can come in but you're going to buy your own drinks and we were like yeah that's fine and so we went in and then we were curing for the coat check and then he just kind of tapped me on the shoulder and said she'll get married and I said Sean carried on talking and then he was like going around telling people

and trying to buy champagne which he couldn't. Oh, Jesus Christ, Lenley. What's that? How long were you married? How long were you married? Oh, I left him in just under a year. But we were together for 10 years. Okay, okay.

You really got it for 10 years. At nine years in he does this. You got married and then you're married. Yeah. After you leave. I mean, I'm going to say it was snowing. You know, I'm going to say almost a little

bit more romantic than the changing rumours. And he did go around afterwards trying to get you some champas. He did try, but they didn't have any, obviously. Yes, just a raspberry vodka cruiser, I guess. I'm going to say, I'm going to say it's just above Zara. It's just above Zara. Linley, thank you. A couple of quick texts to finish. Someone said heaven is a gay club.

Yeah, I just looked at up. It is. That's why when she said husband was... Linley, was that, was it a gay bar? Yeah, yeah, it's massive. It's the biggest biggest gay club in London Is that why he left you? Is that why he left you, Linley?

It's a really good club. Yeah, I know, yeah. Did he leave you for a man? No, no, no, I left him. Oh, you left him. For a woman? No. Okay, just a couple of hetros.

Just wondered, just wondered. But the hetros love the gay bars. I also reckon they did have champagne, they just didn't want to give it to the blatantly hetro guy. Yeah, yeah, the champs is for the gays, ma'am. The shams is for the gay. goes. Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco

beautiful day but sweaty as eF after a long bike ride to get there. Totally freaked out over the height that the bridge was. Tall-A. Then he made me stop to propose and I was very, very grumpy, so grumpy that we redid it in Nashville and didn't tell anybody about the first one. See that's romantic. But how many engagements

at the end of hikes? Yeah. Quite a few. Quite a few. Quite a few. Quite a few on big multi-day treks at like the highest point of the trek. They're not happy about that. Well, I'm going to say Golden Gate's more romantic than Zara changing rooms. Yeah, even if you had a bitch in a mind of them. I reckon we've got the most romantic one.

It's so sad. Okay, go. I lost my father years ago. Where'd you find him again? Vaughan. Put an air tag on him. I got mine microchip. Vaughan.

Vorn. Apologize. Vaughan. I won't. I'm not reading it. I think the message deserved more. I have, okay. It deserves more respect.

No. Sincere meaning play. Sincere apology, Vaughn. I'm sorry. Did you find it? No, I'm not reading it. It's too precious and special. I'll do a buffer one then.

My husband gave me, we'll do a buffer one and everyone will forget about the sort of the terrible reaction I had to say. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah. My husband gave me a birthday card in our garage and I went, and then he went to the toilet and I opened and said, happy birthday. And by the way, will you marry me? So technically, he proposed in writing while he was taking a dump.

I've never let him down 20 years later. Be married for 15, very romantic. Less romantic than Zara changing rooms. Less romantic. But cute, good on you for lasting the distance. Okay, let's finish up with a really... Turn his mic off. I want to... He's no part in this. Okay, sure. I lost my father years ago.

One day my husband said he had a video message for my dad. Little did I know. He'd asked my dad's permission for my hand in marriage in the video where my dad was there telling me all the reasons why I should marry at him. Then my dad in the video said, look in the top kitchen cupboard and there was a ring still crying. That's like, that's a really well-perment. plan treasure hunt. Cheapen's that's isn't that a movie?

Like what was that movie where he leaves they leave messages every year? Yeah, what was that movie? That wasn't he was... P.S. I love you? Yes. Yes. Yeah. That was her husband and he knew he was dying, right?

That's gorgeous. Oh, that's gorgeous. Well done 905 and we do apologize. Such a beautiful text makes full and seem like a bit of a prick now, doesn't it? Yeah, for not apologising. Yeah. Well, I meant in the context, she said I lost my father. We all sort of all know what they mean.

Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley. Where was the last time you owned a car and drove it regularly? Um, 14 years ago, 15 years ago. I haven't had a car for so long because I've lived in the city. And what kind of car was it? It was a Honda prelude. The Honda preludes coming back, baby. Did it go?

Honda, yeah, Honda stopped making the prelude. That thing, bloody, that flew. You could get to New Plymouth in like three hours. Oh, that's too fast. Well, drive to the conditions and drive to the speed limit. It's a limit, not a target. it. So show me this bad boy. What year was it? What year was yours? Cretches was it 1992? How do you know? How do you know this?

Did you spend a lot of time at it? No, you arrived you around? We called it the Silver Fox. Yeah. Dude, no back seat to speak of. Yeah. Oh, that's it. Yeah, here we go. You could squeeze a couple of short kings in the back. Was it a two-door? What did you squeeze? Speak of your experience? Yeah. Someone squeezed a couple of short kings in the thing. I remember. You do three? I remember a roadie and there was definitely two in the back, I was like, I'm so sorry. Gee.

Yeah, that's sort of looked like the 1990-200 prelude. Yeah. Bleach just had a white-mag wheels on it. White mags. Well, it just came like that and so, I don't know. You paid for them. No, I definitely did not.

I didn't pay for anything on that car. The stereo broke. He's not not fixing that. Yeah, got broken into once because I left the face plate on. Remember when you had to take the face plate off? You got to take the face plate off? They smash one of those little triangular windows at the back. Very expensive windows to replace those.

Stole my swimming bag. Oh, those are. Are you going to, does this inspire you? I know you still live in the city, but does this inspire you to get back behind the wheel? Oh yeah, because, you know, fuel prices the way they are, Haley. It's a perfect time to start driving. The Z&P Podcast Network. Marketing came to us and said, we've got some billboards.

And so we asked you, you may remember, a couple of weeks ago, for some slogans for the billboard. Yeah. And they're going to be like slogan with a rating underneath out of five stars. But we don't want to rate our own show because it would be like incredible. amazing. You know, you think they're funny, you should see how hot they are. Five stars, five stars, five stars. And marketing was like, no. How hot a couple of years ago. Yeah, yeah. Oh my God, they were so hot.

This time last year you should have seen it. This time last year you should have seen the three of them. Nothing like a breakup to make you skinny. Oh my gosh. It was shreds spill in here. So these are the ones from last time that we settled on. Okay. So marketing wants and we'll go on billboards. This Friday. Yeah. And then they won another round. So that's why we're back.

Okay. To crowds or some reviews, it will be billboards for the shows. So they're doing their best, three stars. They're doing their best. So it'll be, it'll be, have a picture of us, and I have the big ZM logo, and then it'll say that'll be attributed to whoever sent that in. They're doing their best. Most of the time we're doing our best.

Yeah. Just remembering there was chess week. Do you know what I mean? Sometimes. And yesterday's top six. Yesterday's top six. Your car deserves better, but here we are, three stars. I like that.

so good. Oh, this is better. We're insulting your radio. Yeah, I love it. Could get better, but probably won't. Yep. Another three stars. Three stars needs to be the order of the day.

I'm happy with three stars. It was just on in the Uber, three stars. It was just on in the Uber. Do you know that is my favorite one for the billboards? It was just on in the Uber because it's all I can get. So right now, do we want to take some texts and calls for some suggestions along these lines? Yes, perfect. Of reviews of our show with a star rating.

So it's got to be like, like those were how many words? Just a sentence. A short little phrase. A short little phrase. The more you neg us, the stronger you make us. Go to town. Haley's not an invulnerable state at all. It won't make her cry at all.

Oh, mate, I'm thriving. She's had a lot of sleep. Late period, opening a show on Saturday. Mouth ulcers. It's great. A mouthful of ulcers. Hit me. Okay, so a slogan for the show for the billboards that will run after these ones.

Like Goldilocks beers, only one of them's okay. Which one? Don't. It's Baby Bear, right? Wasn't Baby Bear the one that Goldilocks like the porridge and the bed and the chair? So you're Baby Bear because you're youngest. Yeah.

Okay, well, give us a text. A bit better than silence. It was great. I quite like that. Yeah, better than white noise. Just. Okay, don't forget to add your star rating as well. 0,800 dials at M is the number,

966 to text us. Hit us with some one line of reviews and a star rating. We have asked you. because marketing have asked us for some more slogans for the billboards. We're doing some new billboards and we've thought some good reviews of the show from you guys, our lovely listeners. So the ones, can you go through the ones that are locked in, Vaughn, for week one? And we need your help now for week two. I've got them before me, if you want.

They're doing their best, three stars. Your car deserves better, but here we are. Three stars. Could get better, but probably won't. Fair. That's fair. Yeah. two stars.

It's better than silence. Four stars. Okay, so those are locked in. Oh, it was just on in the Uber. Three stars. I like that. That's my favourite one so far. Oh my God, I'm loving these.

We've said many times, we've got the best listeners in the radio world. Very funny, but also very cutting we're finding today. Everyone's got a bit of sales. Yeah, a bit of SaaS on the Tuesday.

Only because I'm too young for talk back, three stars. Great. Worst house in the best street situation, three and a half stars. That's also good. Yeah, but we'll be laughing when we reno, won't we? Yeah. Yeah, that's right.

If your Reyes had a G-spot, they wouldn't be able to find it. That's what rude, eh? How does someone look and sound like they do? You know why? It's his faces on the billboard, Hayley. Well, that's what the next one. I think we should just put the quotes and get the faces off. It's doing more damage than good.

Should we actually, that could be funny, pixelate our faces on the billboard. Was no ours. Vaughns is the problem. Pixelate Vaughn's face. How does someone look and sound like they don't know how to have sex? Three stars. Proudly disappointing since day one. Yeah, I like that.

The Ryobie of radio shows, two stars max. It's disappointing because you know I love Milwaukee. You're a Milwaukee guy. Haley's the only one here that owns Ryobi products. Yeah, I do. Yuck. No offense. No, no, it's fine.

But then I got, what's the yellow one, Stanley? is that slightly better? Wait, no, I've got a Stanley thing as well. Is that yuck as well? I went from Ryabia to Stanley. That's okay. Okay. I didn't know that we have.

My house is finished. It's fine. Yeah. What am I going to do? Sander. Thing? Knob. Yeah.

I'm slightly not. But like COVID relevant in 2020? Oh, that's just a little. That was actually, actually that's too far. That's too far. That's too far. That's going to unstar that one. Feel free to laugh.

That actually really stung. I drowns up my kids arguing three stars Yeah that's good Until I get a band expaner It's gonna have to do Three stars I like that Not actually the nicest guys in radio Pretty close

Somebody said white bracket people's Close bracket noise So it says white noise Oh yeah white people noise In the middle Okay Although we are brownlessness Because maybe speak up

Yeah sorry brown listeners On our behalf You know that we love the hot brown With the light eyes The hot brown people with the light eyes And one whole fourth for me is brown. Let's not forget about that. Let's hold on to that.

It's a light brown. Let's cling on to that with everything that it's worth. It's a very light. Tick and boxes for that. For that we thank you. Yeah. What else do we got here? Just okay.

Did you read our favourite one? One of the radio stations available. That's my favourite. That is actually, yeah, that with the Uber. It was just on in the Uber. Yeah. Those are my favourite too. Fletchhorn and Haley, it's one of the radio stations available.

Yeah. Oh, brown listener. Love you guys. Thank you. Thank you, Brown listener. Can we just get a confirmation of colour of your eyes? I was going to say, can we put it brown noise as well on the billboard as well? No.

White brown noise? Yeah, you're right. Brown. White noise. Noise for all ethnicities. Yeah. Flethal in Haley. White little noise.

Noise for all ethnicities. Noise for all ethnicities. I kind of like that too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Genuine radio, three stars. I like that. Well, it's radio. There's no doubt about that.

Yeah. Couldn't figure out the frequency for the edge, 2.5 stars. We don't say that word here. I know. I'm really upset by that. Real mean. Millennial brain rot. Yeah?

Are we millennial brain rot? Yeah. But actually, sometimes we do hit it, and if you miss it this morning, some nice articles from ScienceDaily.com. It's not just brain rot, we're actually, we're learning as well. We do learn. We do learn sometimes. We do.

Yeah. Very soon I am. I am going to talk about the embarrassing items I've left in a Sydney hotel, but it's not all brain raw. Yeah, sure, sure. We'll have some science later. Okay, so we're pretty happy with that bunch. The washing machine jingle sounds way better, two stars.

Is that the Samsung jingle? Do do, do, do, do, do, do, do. Racial ambiguous noise. Someone just texted. Yeah. Faces for radio, banter for silence. Oh, wow, that hurts. That's all.

That's coughing, isn't it? I mean, we did ask. You can't ask them. Quite a few people have got my name wrong in this. I don't know. Yeah, that's awful. Yeah, well, it all sounds the same on the radio, doesn't it? Hailey. Yeah, it does, Haley. Okay, so happy there? Any more? No?

Yeah, I think we've had enough, and so the text machine can stop. Did you just, oh, the look on your face, did you just read one that was bad? No. Just go hurt. Someone took a tip-off. I don't know how Brie and Clinton are doing their roast on Friday, because I would just cry the whole time. Fills and Time is quite good. Fills and Time. Good stuff. Good stuff.

Okay, thank you for your suggestions. That'll make up. We'll go through those and sort out week two for the Billboard slogans. 549. 549, leave me alone. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh, Forne and Haley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Star Wars fact of the Star Wars fact of the Star Wars facts Oh yeah They're pretty interesting facts How yeah, live long and prosper baby Not quite Must be a horrible time on the Where do they live on that planet

That's a death star Is that what they live on? The PVC troopers, the stormtroopers. Plastics gone up 40%. Oh, that'd suck, ma'am. So how are they going to pay for the stormtroopers? No idea. I'll just go to another planet and get

the resources they need. Famously, that was what the Empire did. There's a few parallels to be drawn between the Empire and, I don't know. Some current governments around the world. Yeah. When they want a resource, they just kind of rock in with a military force and take it. Go, that's mine now. That's mine. I'll use that.

I don't know. You draw the parallels if you can see any. Today's fact of the day is are that R2D2 and C3PO the best pal droids throughout the Star Wars franchise kind of all of them I don't know what was that one?

I don't know but he's, oh no that's not That's the Mandalorian. I do, do you have a posh British accent? Yeah. Bother. Anthony Daniels who plays C3PO who's still alive and kicking

even though we've lost a lot of them. Han Solo Harrison Ford who played Hans Solow He's alive for him. He's alive and well, yeah. He's alive. Yeah, although he's got Parkinson's. No, no, no, no, that's just in the TV show.

But he does it so well. I know. I know he doesn't. I've been real sad that he's got it, but he doesn't actually have it. So, yeah. Shrinking season three has come out? It's so good. I haven't seen it yet. Yeah, it's such a great show. Season one and two are amazing. Yeah.

And he's brilliant in that. But I think emotionally I've got to be in the right state of mine to watch that show because it is amazing. Yeah. But Anthony Daniels is still kicking. Kenny Baker, who played R2D2. He got inside the R2D2. Is that the white. He was a little fellow, yeah.

Little fellow. Yeah, a little fellow. He got in the Artur Dito's the white drawing. Dome, yeah. Yeah, because now they were just remote control a day. Well, they remote control of BBA. He would have been a hot man. Well, you know, they were in the like deserts and stuff.

Didn't they have a fan in there for him? I don't, I don't think so, not back in the day. No, okay. So, even though they were like buddies and spent so much time, they didn't like each other in real life. Didn't they? No, they like openly spoke about it. Oh, I hate learning that stuff.

when you think that they're friends. Well, people put it down to the fact that these two guys were like jammed into these metal outfits and then had to parade around the desert for the first while getting to know each other. And because they were so cranky and hot and stuff, they just got off on the wrong foot. And Anthony Daniels, who plays C-3Pyodor,

got that posh voice again? Who? I don't bother. I must go to the desert. My father, he must a look. I must stop you not. He said he was one of those quite like proper English actors that got involved in Star Wars, like Alec Gannis, who played the original Obi-1 Kenobi

be in. Yeah. The guy played Moftark and they were like proper to do. So they thought the science fiction stuff was a little bit below them. So he said, I am quite a hard deal with fellow at times.

And Kenny Baker, who was in the R2d2 costume, who was just like, I got no time for the guy. Oh wow. They were not friends whatsoever. And Kenny Baker's passed away now. But the guy in the, what's that?

R2D2. The little white guy's R2D2. The big gold grade C3Pia. The R2D2, he didn't. talk or anything. He was just moving it inside. Yeah, right. He was in the thing. Because his is

Bibu, bibu, bivu, bivu. It's not realistic. Like, how does C3Pio know what he's saying? He's a master of human cyborg relationship. He's fluent in other 3,000 languages. He's fluent in many, many languages. Anyway, today's fact of the day for Star Wars Week is despite being

a sort of besty frenemies as R2D2 and C3PO, The actors who played them really didn't like each other. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day, day. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. The ZM Podcast Network play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Haley. So I was in Aussie recently and I went to Sydney as part of it. I was in Melbourne for a long time.

but Sydney was only there for two nights. So I had my suitcase there, which was very full, but I didn't unpack, you know. I didn't move in in the way that I did in Melbourne. And then so when I left, I thought I had everything. And then I got an email from the Edina that I stayed at. Oh, yeah, okay. Surrey Hills, lovely area. Oh, lovely.

It was very nice. Quite gay and I enjoyed that. I was going to say, I think the gay's moved in. Yeah, it's lovely. It's nice, Benedict, 28 bucks. Yeah, man, it was all very expensive. of lots of like lovely cocktail bars and stuff. Yeah.

I appreciated it. Well, the guys can afford $28 eggs, Benny, because they don't have kids. Yeah, that's right. Most of the, yeah. Not Missouri Hills ones. Do they have kids? They didn't have kids.

No, God, no. Gay trification. It was gay trification. They were out for cocktails, Tuesdays, Wednesdays. It was lovely. So I stayed there at this place and I got an email saying, hi, hi, Haley, I hope you're well. Upon you check out from the hotel today,

we found some lost property left in your room. Oh, no. Remember I had the ring light? Yeah. So I forgot that. Now, just for those that missed it, Haley was broadcasting from those hotel rooms. For three weeks.

So you went to Kmart, you got the ringlight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it wasn't like a super expensive one. Because it's just for a moment for maybe some people, it's sounding like it was an only fan's hotel. Would give it what else they found. What do you mean? What else they found?

How much did you leave behind? Okay, so... So the ringlight you said you were going to leave behind. Yeah, because I was like, I was overweight with my baggage. and I only had one more show to broadcast. And it was like 10 bucks. And it was in Brisbane.

Yeah, it was literally 10, $15 or something. So I was like, I'll just leave it there. Yeah. But I've just, yeah, you've actually made me think. Oh my God, they're going to, okay. So they said, and a bag of some clothes. And I was like, what? A bag of some clothes.

And I was like, oh my God, that's right. In the hurry of getting to Sydney, I had to check in, quickly grab a bunch of stuff out and head to the venue where I was to do my tech and stuff. And I think I grabbed a bag out and I did shove it in the wardrobe. because then I didn't unpack the rest of it when I checked out. I didn't recheck the wardrobe.

Currently holding it at reception would organise a time for you to come and collect it. And then I email back being like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. Also, we'll organise a time. Like, it's a hotel in Sydney. No one is living in Sydney

that can just pop across town. Sorry, how we get this stuff. They're visiting. Yeah, I know. If we don't hear from you in three months, the lost property will be donated to the local St. Vinnie's. Right.

We're like, don't even wait for the three months. do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So then I was trying to think, when I got home to New Zealand, so anyway, I emailed back saying like, oh, sorry, I left the ring light, it's fine. I said it's broken, but I was just being, chuck in a landfill, sorry. But I couldn't figure out what the clothes were, because I

just, I wouldn't know it all. So I said, oh, that's done, you can put that in the trash, I'm going back to New Zealand, though, can you advise me, like, how to post home, and then I sent them my credit card were through a secure link thing, so they could get a quote to send it, and then they sent me a thing saying, we can confirm we've now sent this,

That's pretty good service. Really good. Really good. Yeah, it was all through a thing. Because I just sort of said I would have done it and then just chucked in the barn. Yeah, same. Yeah, they sent me a receipt for the postage and everything. I got home last night, lay, and there was a parcel. And it was from Australia and I was like, here it is. This is great. And I opened it up and there's two skirts that I had bought over there.

And I was like, I forgot about those. Yay. That's when your shopping's a problem. Yes. Yeah, yeah. I was like, I forgot about those. Yeah, yeah, yeah they are. And then I was like, what are the other clothes?

It was one singlet that I could have done without. There was a peer of quite large control, Lundies. You know me, I've got absolutely no shame. And there was a small box. And I was like, what's this box? I flip it over. And it's, so in Melbourne, the Wild Secrets warehouse is there. Wild Secrets is an adult fun toy website.

and they sponsor the sex. Dot Life podcast and they'd come to see the show and they'd brought me gifts and one of them was a small sort of small lipstick size thing that they was said I'd be the first person

in Australasia to try and that was in there as well and now I've just put two and two together that that combined with the ring light gives big only fans where you will find me oh no no I'm not

but yeah they send it back I think the only comfort is it was like unwrapped in the box like a new in packaging. So they didn't know what was in. They wouldn't have opened the box. No, no, the box says what it is

but they would have known that it was brand new. Yeah, right. Unused. Why does this always keep happening to me? The ZDM Podcast Network. What's going on? ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley.

The question posed is, actually like him or are you just dopamine dating? Wow. It's also, it's very prevalent in people with ADHD, which, you know, their dopamine signaling is disordered. So you're always hunting for a little hit. But in general, we all, that's why we scroll. Yeah.

That's why we have a little treat. We're dopamine seeking. And a lot of people are realizing that they don't actually like these people. I just need a little hit. I needed the attention, the novelty, and a bit of a fantasy version of the situation that I've created in my head. And how does that, how does...

This was you last year. This was you know, just first getting back out there and then you were like, oh, God, you're a bit of a dud, but you're giving me the attention I so richly desire. Why not? Yeah, that's pretty full on, isn't it? It's actually leading to a lot of people who are starting to realize that their dopamine dating

rather than actually having a genuine connection with people, it's leading to a lot of people dating, people they're actually not attracted to at all. And they have no connection with all nothing. Like dating like, Dard Mingus. But you're stuck with them. You can always go. But like you're opening yourself to this.

It becomes a repeated behavior. Right. Yep. A lot of people were saying that, you know, talked about this before, dating at burnout. They're like, oh, not finding anyone with a good connection. So then once you get rid of that, you're like, I'll just look for some attention instead.

And then your standards go lower. And then nobody's happy. Nobody's happy. And then you kind of like see the light and go, oh my God, I was just looking for this. And they're like dating apps or the other. Other reason? Other reason because it's like real.

Swipe. Yeah, swipe. And you just numb to it. And then hours have passed and you're just looking for a little hit. So then you see your face good. enough, you're like, sure. And then if they match back, you're like, yeah, and then they match back, you're like, here we go,

a little attention, then you start messaging, and you're like, mm-mm, mm-mm. A bit of attention. A little bit of attention. And then you start, they start flirting and you're like, okay, well, I'm building a whole image of this person, that's not real. And then they go to Haley's house and she cooks them a four-course meal. Dang, feed it.

And they were like, oh, I was just actually just here for a hookup. I literally was working on that bit for my show yesterday about it. I was like, do you know what, man? I put so much food in my head. and to these people. Oh, God. You live, you learn. The ZM Podcast Network.

Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley. Well, staff, and, in fact, just people doing the tour and locals noticed a celebrity popping into the Sydney Harbour Bridge tour. I saw this. Sydney Sweeney just went up the... The bridge is named after her, so... Yeah. I only seem spacious you climb up.

The Sydney-Sweeney Bridge. The Sydney-Sweeney Harbour Bridge. Yeah. But yeah, staff were just like, oh, okay. But they must get celebs coming in all the time. Yeah, a huge main global attraction like that. They'd get it all the time, for sure. Because as, like, penguin's celebs go to Queensland.

They'll do the shot over Jed or the bungee. The classics. Every now and again, you see the wall of celebrities or the names of all the celebs that have done it? Yeah. I mean, we can't play because we get celebs. We talk to them and interview them. Yeah, they're guys the listeners.

Yeah, they come in all the time, are they? Yeah, yeah. But like just last week we had from the rookie Melissa O'Neill who I always get the characters confused with their actual names. That's the son of a good actor.

That's the son of a good actor, exactly. She was, they were touring around the country and just popped into a few cafes. Yeah. People were like, oh my God. Or Amelia Clark was here for my movie that I co-wrote. And she went to the...

If you missed it. Just in case you missed it. I wrote a movie. Yeah. And everyone was like, she just popped up at the Wellington Fish Supply. Getting some fish in her. Everyone was like, what are you two in here, Mother of Dragons? It's like, well, I'm very careful about my omega-3 intake, huh?

I'm getting a little bit of here, Tadikie. A slice of salmon. Not a very oily fish. Tadikahi? No, it's not. Salmon's an oily. You want salmon as I know you want, that's the oily fish, isn't it? It's the one.

Sardines, also good for you. But that hit the news as well, didn't it, when she went in there. Because it's a fish and chip shop. Yeah. Okay, well, this is a question we want to know now. Has a celebrity just come into work? Do you work somewhere and there's always a celebrity there? I mean, celebrities have to go to the supermarket, isn't they?

Yeah. Well, I mean, I guess not the big ones. You'd never see Kim Kardashian at the supermarket. No, they actually did an episode on the Kardashians where Kylie was like, I want to go to a supermarket. I'm going to see what it's like. And everyone was like, oh. It sucks.

It sucks, yeah. And then there she's like, it sucks. Yeah. But if you were that level of celebrity, you wouldn't go. You wouldn't go. Your person doesn't. mob you. Okay, so 0800 dials at Amazon number.

TEC already getting some messages through. 966 is the text number. Have you had a celebrity come into where you work? Oh! And who was it? Getting some big celebs. 9696 is a number. Sarah, what celebrity just turned up at work?

Yes. Morning guys. Long time listener first time caller. Dig down. Welcome to the show, Sarah. Welcome. Welcome. So I used to work at Planet Hollywood when it first opened.

In New Zealand. This was the short-lived Planet Hollywood. It was in Auckland. It was in the IMAX building on Queen Street. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. How long did it last? I'm not sure. I was here for a couple of years before it went.

Yeah. And then I went overseas. But I worked in a private dining room. We used to kind of rotate shifts and stuff, but I got to serve Robin Williams and his family when he was here. for a vice-inennial man premiere. Oh, my God, that movie. Wow.

Yeah, it's pretty cool. Lovely, lovely guy. And then Christina Aguilera. Oh, my God. When she was here, and then the guy that played Mini Me on Austin Powers. Burn Troia. Yeah.

Wow. So was this like the end of the 90s, start of the 2000s kind of era? Early, early 2000s, I think, from memory. The late 90s. And then also I worked in London. in Harrods for 10 years. So obviously loads of slaves there. We had another person texting about Harrods.

I think that might have been me. Oh, you did a follow-up? Okay. Hang on, you listed off Beyonce? Yeah, yeah, that was me. Yeah, Beyonce. Arnold Schwarzenegger, I walked in behind Arnold Schwarzenegger into work one day. George Michael, Rod Stewart.

And what did Arnie say? Did he say, I'll be back. Oh, my God. It's not getting you the chopper. He would say, this is a chopper. He'd say, this is my bag. Yeah, I was just heading into work and he was coming into, going into the store. Sorry, having met Arne, can you just give me a good review?

Because I actually haven't done it for it. Haley's famous for her terrible impersonation of Arnold Schwarzenegger. Let's just have a reset here. Yeah. Okay. Get to the chopper. It's getting worse. It's getting worse.

It's getting worse. Hit me. Out of ten, where is it at? Maybe five Sarah That's generous Sarah You're being too generous What was Beyonce like in person

She was obviously like a big entourage She was kind of doing a tour through the store She came through my department where I was working So yeah all glammed up and everything obviously But yeah And then we chased David back around the store Trying to get a photo Obviously you're not supposed to take photos

It was not the dumb thing But yeah He's David back in. My friends and I kind of like, yeah, ran through the store trying to track him down and I've got a very blurry photo on my terrible old Nokia flip-pile. Oh my God, amazing. Oh, my God, what a... You've seen heaps.

That's so good, Sarah. Amazing. Thank you for Sherry. That's so good. Katie, what celebrity came into your store? That's a pretty tough story to follow. Yeah, sorry, Maddie. We should have a headliner.

Yeah. I'm a fresh start. I was working in. retail in Wellington at a store that sold bedding. It was in 2016, and I'm about 99% sure I served Scarlet Johansson. Oh, yeah.

She was here. What was she filming here? That weird. She goes to the shell. That's right. That's right. Oh, yeah, so you met Scarlett Johansson. That's a great story.

Well, maybe. She had really dark hair, so I couldn't, like, be 100% sure. That's right. It was real, real dark. I mean, yeah, look. But also, hang on, why is she buying bedding?

Like, she'd be staying in a... Do you think she was like, I don't like these sheets? She passed the bed. She pissed the bed. And she didn't want anyone to know. I don't know if you were rich enough, you probably wouldn't, if you weren't happy with the hotel sheets, you'd just go buy some.

I think you would. You probably staying at an Airbnb, maybe she was here long term. Yeah, maybe. Katie, brilliant. Thank you. So I'll just text on wise Kermit the frog saying, get to the chopper. That's not...

Get to the chopper. Right. It's still... Get to the chopper. See, that's Kermann. It's still not getting better, Haley. But did you hear more Davey back in before? That's flawless.

That's pretty good. That's a good. That's pretty good. Some more texts. I'm not going to say who the celebrity was, but I will say, morning guys, I see we could event cinemas and Lala Hart. A celebrity came into watch a movie, but then got kicked out because he came out of that movie when it finished and tried to sneak into another movie.

Excuse you? Okay, we need to know what celebrity did that. He knows. It's written on the text machine, but I'm not going to say that about. I'm going to turn the mics off and you tell us. Okay. Okay. I don't even know who that is.

Okay, carry on. It's not that cool. It's not a headliner. No, it's not a headliner. I was doing a coffee event and Dan Carter showed up. It's a bunch of British kids. I was working at a backpacker-style island resort in Cambodia, an interesting group of British kids came in to stay.

Look, some looked really familiar. The room went around about Princess Eugenie had been spotted. Oh, okay. Looked up, one of the ones, the checker names, one of the girls that signed it is Eugenie Windsor. Oh. Why is she signing a real name? Well, because you're travelling.

You can't use a fake name. You've got to show your passport, don't you? Someone helps serve Shania at the supermarket. Yeah, I serve Shania. Shania Twain and Wannock in New World. She pulled out a pile of hundies to pay for a bottle of water. Why, now we're talking that Shania money. She's on that Shania money.

Yeah, that's good stuff. We're on holiday on the Gold Coast recently. Kevik Kovov. Kovov. Kevin Kossner. You said Keva Kostner. Keva Kostner. He did, didn't he?

A Keva Kostner. Kev & Kostner. Okay. Kovner Kovner. I saw Wentworth Miller shopping when I was in L.A. It was peak prison break era. Yeah.

Good stuff. I was working at a school resort in California and saw Fran Dresser. Oh, the nanny. Oh my God. Look at the... That's good. Oh, look at the snow.

I sound like lowest from family. Yeah, that was way more lowest for family than it was Frangresser. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God. Just the sheriff. Mr. Sheffield. Play.

Play, Z-N. Flesh, one and Haley. Before we get into Not Enough for the News News segment, we must just have some personal chat with Bryn. Yeah, so you went over, you were in Australia. I was, yeah, just for the weekend.

I thought maybe you were going over to spot Sydney Sweeney on the bridge. Yeah, apparently she was there. Apparently, do you know who else was there? Who? Jeff Goldblum. Oh, we love it. What's he doing?

What was he doing there? I think he was going to do the Harbour Bridge crossing maybe So what were you doing there? I was not doing the Harbour Bridge crossing I went over to do a 10K run Why? Exactly Why didn't you do a 10K running

But why didn't you do a 10K in Sydney You know that the Hamleth There was a Hamilton run at the weekend Was there? That's literally like a hour drive I think it was the Hamilton half or something like that Was it? I had a friend do the 10K

The Hammy Half They call it Yeah not quite the same As you know running past the opera house What are the differences? Well the Opera House You've got the Sydney Harbour. You've got Claudelems.

Any house is an opera house if you're... Yeah, Claudelands. There's Claudelems arena? The river, the gardens. Sorry to our Hamilton listeners. I know there are many of them. A heaps. But I just prefer Sydney.

Yeah. That's crazy, man. Yeah, well, it's crazy. How'd you go on your 10K? Let's not talk about the time. Now, Haley, you've done... Oh, thank you so much for bringing it up for the second time this break. Yeah, thank you.

She's done a right. A 10.5 in an hour and four minutes or something? I know that you're late. No one likes a quick finisher. No, no, they don't. Just sort of in general, yeah. It's sort of a rule, yeah. What was your placing or time for your 10K?

Go on, Brinney. Because you did go all the way to Sydney for it. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's a lot. Yeah. Flights, accommodation. You've got to share your time with us. Wait, did you not do it?

No, I did it. Right. But they put me in the slow group. No, you elect where you go. Oh, well, I was in the slow group. So how long was your 10K? It was, I was. Over an hour, let's just say that.

That's fine. Was it close to two? It wasn't, no, no, no. Actually, 24 hours is over an hour. You know what I mean? No. No, it was about an hour of 15. That's really good.

No, I wanted to get under an hour. How much training did you do? Zero. You always said that's, you followed my book. I went to Japan the week before and ate a lot of ramen. You followed my program. Yeah, I did actually. Yeah, the night before I have a couple of drinks, couple of darts and a ramen and then see how you go.

Yeah. All right, well, it's time for our segment. Not enough for the news news news stories that you don't make the main news. Gailda, good morning. British kids are here raising the bar on internet cunning. That's coming.

Glad I read that the right word. He's been raw dog delivered this 45 seconds. I've not checked this like always. With a third bypassing online age checks for games and apps by simply drawing a moustache on their face with an eyebrow pencil. Oh my goodness. God, that's brilliant.

That is so good. When the age verification software said, I mustach you a question. Is that real? One 12-year-old said, bet. Is that... That's just what 12-year-olds say. Is that what they say?

It's abbreviated you bet. You bet. Yeah. Bet. Apparently making it into the app by a whisker. Oh, that's good. One mum called her son, mid-forgery,

describing it as a hairy situation. But he goes to... got to No, the ones in brackets don't need that's kind of the one. The point explaining himself. The software has been waving through teens who are at best

bedly legal. I will say, as someone who has written this for Bryn in the past, he doesn't take performance notes well. The brackets are you doing brackets? There's one more thing in brackets in the last story. Just go ahead and get yourself familiar

with the second last line of that. Don't read the brackets. is to read sentences. You don't put notes in the market. No, you can. Just send it to me about, you know, before 45 seconds. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a fair call.

That's a fair call. But no, lovely work. Okay, next story. A man in Russia is facing deportation after leaving a review for a skirt on a website, writing that it hides not just the flaws in my figure, but also the fact that I'm a guy. Okay.

Long enough to cover a shlong. Authorities apparently unable to skirt around the issue. charged him with promoting non-traditional sexual orientations. He's now facing deportation, which is a pretty tremendous overreaction.

That is clunky, Vaughan. Which is a pretty tremendous, which is a, he's now facing deportation, which is a pretty, pretty horrendous. Like a hem on a skirt. Yeah, I'm horrendous, it's horrendous, horrendous,

tremendous. I did a better job last week. I'm just going to say. I don't think you did. I think I did. I don't think you did. I think I did. Okay. Maybe take that one from the top.

Take that low. He's now facing deportation, which is a pretty tremendous overreaction to what was, by all accounts, a tailored review. Seems the government was... Putin on the pressure. She's gasbagging over a great out one. Seems the government was Putin on the pressure.

Like Vladimir Putin. Fawn's just taken his own glasses off and applauded him. By the way, that's not me applauding. That's flesh-apporting. You can tell that Vaughn's ridden these. I'll say that. It's clunky, man. It's clunky.

All right, Brett. Knock it out of the park, buddy. Last story. Here we go. And finally, monkeys in Gibraltar have discovered the ultimate post-junct food remedy, eating dirt. Having developed a taste for tourist chocolate,

crisps and ice cream, the monkeys are now soiling. Their reputation by deliberately swallowing handfuls of earth to settle their stomachs, taking them from rock bottom, to a rocky bottom. That's better. Cleaner.

See, that was a better story born. It was clean. It was not finished yet. Oh, yeah. Oh, gosh, he just, he doesn't know when to stop. This is heavy. Here we go. All right, all right, here we go.

Here we go. Let's everyone can do it. Researchers say the monkeys claim to fame. He's not said that quite right. Claim. Claim. Like claim. Again, it could have ended there.

Calame. Yeah. It could have ended before this line. Okay. Claim to fame is there... Okay, I'm just going to start this bit again. Researchers say the monkeys claim to fame is their appeal to tourists, but a few treats between primates, as in mates.

A few treats between mates. That one was the easiest one yet, Brin. Leaves them going ape, reaching for the gravel scone. God, that's good. What I found an ant-aned... I found, I invented an ant acid pine. to do with rocks? Are you kidding me?

How does he do it? What you did was ten clunky ones beforehand. So we're so jumbled in the brain. Reaching for the gravel skull. Yeah, but that would have been great. Was less around it. Are there any spots left in the comedy festival? I think you're going to have a rest from writing these.

Wait. There's one more. There's more. What's his headline joke? I simply must get this bit out. Okay. Experts say don't muddy the waters by feeding the monkeys. You don't do a,

worst joke after your best joke. That's famously not how comedy goes. Reaching for the gravel sky. Yeah, see, even you know that was your best. Well done, Vaughan. 966, your feedback on... Also, the text machine's gone dead. I think we've lost them all. I think we'll lost them all with those clunky punks.

Clunky puns. Clunky puns. Now, just for the listener, what time was it when everybody said, has anybody written anything for what's the news story? It was about 30 minutes a guy Was it about 920? And yet you still managed to try to put Every second word as a pun

Making it thus Unreadable The man won't sleep Brin from the newsroom Thank you It's not your fault Everyone said yes to Brin Anything Brin says is great

Brin is too good for this shit You're ruining him You can put that on a billboard Yeah we could Yeah yeah Yeah it's too good for this shit Yeah yeah Just kind of poke you

Speaking of your billboards. You know that we've sort of moved away from that topic, but I have some lines. Bram would have to say. For those that missed earlier, we're going to have some billboards rolling out. Phrases like it was on in the Uber. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's slightly better than silence. Two stars. Definitely a radio show. Yeah, one of the radio shows available. Yeah, what were your suggestions, Bryn? You get used to it. That's good one. That's good.

That's good one. It grows on you. Okay. That's more complimentary. Yep. You'll know it when you hear it. Those are good, Bryn. Those are fair.

Those are good. Fear and good. Yep, thank you, Bruney. The Z&P Podcast Network. It's a show real. Play ZDN's Fletch, Vaughan and Haley. We're a wide range of ages, ages in this team. Fletch, you're our oldest at 46.

Ouch. On the only, according to your birth certificate. Not the way you live or look. So, I'm talking about. about age because science and survey have worked out the age for peak health and happiness. Okay, Georgia, how old are you? Oh, it's my birthday month, guys, 32 this month. Did you mention that yesterday during your show?

You're always mentioning your birthdays coming up. I do the same. Do you want such a fuss? Absolutely. What is that day in May is it, Georgia? 24th, it's a Sunday, so you better remember on the Monday. I want to put that into my personal calendar. Yes, okay.

And I'm going to have a repeating every year. Okay, and I will let me know a couple of days before. Pity of a year's great. So how old are you? 32? Yeah. 36, 46, 46, 43 through... 4.

The peak age for happiness, 47. Yet to come, team, Fletch. 47? Not knocking. How did they make this age? It was done a lot by survey, basically, where asking people about how they live, how they feel from ages of 18 to 70s.

Yep. So 80s could be happiest, but I doubt it. Looking at things like how they feel about their body, how they feel about the world, their habits, how often they party, what they buy, what they eat, how they exercise, everything. And that was at 47. I would have thought it would have been in the 30s.

Is that because you're not feeling that great right now? No, no, like I feel happy and I feel great. So people over their 40s, half of them say that they got healthier later in life because they finally understand their body's better. You know, you're like, this is how my body works not trying to follow this diet that this person did anything. 32% of them are more likely to buy healthier food

might have a bit of money or, you know, you know a bit more, we're informed. 28% party and drink far less than in their 20s and 30s. And then there's the, this is the element that I like and that I definitely feel the older I get. 35% care less about pleasing others and prioritise their own wellbeing instead. Totally.

We just like, actually, don't care. Can't wait to hit that age. Yeah. And also like you're just like don't care as much about your body and what it looks like. You care more about what it feels, I think, as you get older. Yeah. So 47 was the number. Right.

And then a different survey, just as an interesting side step, said that Brits in particular don't consider someone old until after age 69. Nice. Nice. So 70s on basically and people go, oh yeah, that's, you're getting old. But up into your, like, you're getting old. late 60s. I was going to say like what about the rest times because you hear the stories of the debaught tree but they're probably sore and you know creaky and yeah I don't know that they're

doing the most creative of positions you know what I mean it's so they are still doing it though mate they are getting it well congratulations to you podcast list that you've reached the end so I would assume if you've listened all this way through you're either asleep in which case wake up or you enjoyed it so drop us a review and tell you free Friends, that's how podcasts work. Play ZEMs, Fletchhorn and Haley.